#which I know (I hope) is not true but. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bitterie-sweetie · 4 months

Note

Heyyy! If you’re open for requests, there’s this TikTok that I saw where a pregnant lady had her husband lift her heavy belly for a few minutes and it gave her some relief. I somehow could see Mingyu do that. His wife having a hard time getting used to her growth and him trying his best to help her 🫠🫠🫠

baby ⇢ mingyu x reader, 1k, fluff, domestic au ⇢ warnings: pregnancy, "baby" as a term of endearment, mingyu being his usually sweet self (mostly), established relationship

"This is all your fault, you know."

At the sharp tone of your words, Mingyu looks up from his phone.

"This," you gesture at yourself, at the unmistakable way your stomach now protrudes, a little larger each day as time creeps closer to your due date. "This baby is already huge and we're not even halfway there. It's all your fault, Kim Mingyu. You and your—your stupidly big bones and your long limbs and your giant frame and, and—"

It's another empty complaint, that's all. Lately that's been much of what comes out of your mouth the moment your sore feet touch the floor, having to support your new weight, and when you're rushing to the bathroom again after just having left it. And when you hear Mingyu's mom lament about how heavy he was at birth, you don't even want to think about how the next few months are going to go.

This pregnancy is both a blessing and a curse.

You get up from your chair, eager to crawl into bed and let sleep magically melt away your problems if it comes at all tonight. But before you can take a single step, Mingyu is there. It takes him two steps to cross the room and come to your side, and while he usually wears a big smile whenever he looks your way, now it's been completely replaced with a frown. A solemn expression.

"I'm sorry, baby," he says softly, gingerly pulling you into a hug.

"W-what? What are you apologizing for?"

"All of it."

You take a step back and try to wiggle out of his arms so you can properly read his expression. "Hey, I was just joking—"

"Y/N," he says, shaking his head as he loosens his arms, "it's hard going through all this alone. You know I would help if I could."

He's being genuine—that much you can see, but that makes you all the more concerned. Is there something going on? What does he mean? So much of your attention has been focused on preparing for the baby ever since finding out the good news that you hardly had a moment to stop and consider his feelings in all of this, and for a second your heart drops at the thought that there might be something wrong.

Mingyu's never been one to hide anything though. He always wears his heart on his sleeve and speaks without a filter—which is only a bad thing when he showers you with overly cheesy compliments—and even now, one look in his eyes tells you exactly what you want to know. You can see the excitement floating in his eyes, the absolute adoration at the start of this new chapter in your lives, the nerves of being a parent for the first time.

But also mixed in there is a ton of guilt.

While none of it is his fault, you can tell that he's feeling the immense guilt of watching you suffer to bring a child into this world while he is, well, still very much his regular self.

"Mingyu, you are helping. You've been doing all the cooking and running around to get me whatever I'm craving, which has been a lot these days. You set up the baby's room all on your own, and then there are your massages—I'm going to get so used to having this luxury that I'll be asking for them even after all this."

His frown only deepens. "Baby, that's not enough. I hate seeing you in pain and being unable to do anything about it. I wish I could take it from you."

"Hey, look at me." You heave a sigh, reaching to take his face between your hands. "I'm fine, Mingyu. You know how strong I am, right? I can handle it. In fact, you should worry more about what this kid might do in the future."

"Knowing the two of us, that's probably true." He wavers for a second before a smile starts to creep onto his face, but he holds it back, almost shyly. "Y/N, can I try something?"

"Like what?"

Mingyu steps closer until the space between you diminishes, leaving only your belly pressed against his. Then in one motion, he takes his hands and carefully places them under your belly, and then lifts.

"Does this help at all?" he asks, face gleaming with tentative hope.

You slowly relax into his hands and take notice of how everything shifts. The weight pressing on your bladder is alleviated immediately, and your sore lower back feels much better. Even your feet aren't quite as in pain as before. "Yeah, actually. This helps a lot. Thank you, baby."

"Good. Then I'll do this for you all day." Then he nuzzles even closer to you, burying his face in the crook of your neck as you wrap your arms around him as much as you can. There's still too much space between you with the baby in the way, but when you close your eyes and listen to the sound of Mingyu's steady breaths, it's enough to spread a warmth in your heart that takes you back to the early days of your relationship.

"Hey, Y/N?" Mingyu pulls back slightly to look at you.

"Hmm?"

"Do you really think we should be worrying about how our kid might turn out? What they might be like?"

You study him, looking beyond the spark of anxiety in his eyes. "Well, yeah, but they'll be fine. Trust me, if they have your genes, they'll basically be perfect already. You were a perfect kid."

"I guess I kind of was." He stays still for a moment, but when he meets your eyes again, there's a mischievous smile threatening to creep across his lips. "Yeah, see, I wasn't exactly worried that the kid might turn out like me."

"Hey, Kim Mingyu!"

#mingyu imagines #mingyu scenarios #mingyu x reader #my fic #ok i know you sent this in may....... OTL #srry this took forever anon 😭 you prob thought it wasn't gonna see the light of day #which is half true bc it's just that.... i was going to turn this down at first #bc i'm not a fan of domestic aus and esp not pregnancy aus 😅#but then... it's kim mingyu... and like #idk what it is about him but surprisingly i actually had this idea come to mind?#so it was a great writing challenge!!#well anyway!! uhhhh if ur still around i hope you like it :')

260 notes · View notes

skunkes · 2 months

Text

What he said

#having so much trouble focusing on work this month i jst want to draw the same 5 things in my sketchbook over #and over again....#a doodley #also ive been so TORN bc i work loosely in sketchbook...of course...i dont make any ''finished'' pieces so everything is just Whatever #but i keep seeing ppl say its bad to draw without purpose....#which is true....bc practice makes permanent #i fear im getting my wheelbarrow stuck in the mud. or whatever that one post/quote was. hope u know the one #was it mud? or cement? either way it was SOMETHING about how if you wheel down the same path over and over again #itll be hard to break free

187 notes · View notes

phoenixcatch7 · 9 months

Text

Cap should be allowed to teleport to the rock with his transformation lightning. I mean that's where it's coming from, after all.

He would use it to get out of so many situations XD.

Batman: captain, do you have a minute to stay after this meeting?

Billy, going to be late for school if he doesn't hup to: um haha sorry the wizard wants me back at the rock I'm already pushing it hahaSHAXAM

The wizard, looking up from his orb: *raises an eyebrow*

Cap, transforming back with more lightning and rushing for his bag: I'm sorry I'm sorry Mrs Ermine is going to KILL me if I'm late again this week!

The wizard, to his rapidly retreating back: this is the seventh time this month you've used me as an excuse.

Billy, halfway down the hall of sins, voice echoing: I said I'm sorrrryyyyyyy!!

Batman, left all the way on the watchtower: :|

#This is how he avoids all the fangirls and reporters XD #Freddy gets a video of cap doing the ✌️ *fades from sight* vine but it's a huge crash of thunder #It has the power to make everyone assume lightning is how cap arrives in earth (which is TECHNICALLY true)#People try to count the lightning strikes like they're kids trying to see how close the storm is but there's just too many lol #In the end they give up counting to try and figure out when caps coming or going and crime just tanks in lightning storms #Ironically the lack of crime means that's the time Billy transforms the least XD #Like I know he uses portal doors but they never get enough use anyway and the champion of magic guardian of the rock #probably needs emergency access. Plus you can't take anyone else the lightning way and you'd probably kill them trying!#captain marvel dc #dc captain marvel #shazam #billy batson #Dc the captain :D. I like his new name I hope they keep it #Anyway #rock of eternity

533 notes · View notes

blueskittlesart · 8 months

Note

do you have any thoughts on zelda not staying as a dragon? me personally I like it and am very cool with it mostly because I think zelda should get to be happy forever (and because I'm smart enough to know she changed back because of recall and not some ambiguous power of love lmao) but a lot of people seem to dislike that it made the draconification inconsequential?

i think there's like. some valid concerns surrounding inconsequentiality/"curing" the physical problems characters have as a way of giving them a "happy ending" but I think those concerns don't necessarily apply to totk in the way people seem to be applying them, especially irt zelda's draconification and link's arm.

most of the time when the criticism of this "magic cure" trope is applied to media, it's because the trope is used as a cure-all to erase a character's suffering or trauma and make them "normal" again, and often ignores the character development or themes of the story in favor of giving the character a happy ending. I don't think that applies to totk, though, because the "curing" link and zelda experience is both within the realm of possibility given the worldbuilding present in the game (recall could easily have done it, as you mentioned) AND thematically consistent with the rest of the game. One of if not the most important central themes of totk is the idea of failure and second chances. we see a hyrule that has been given a second chance after link's initial failure with the calamity brought it to the brink of destruction. we see characters who were deeply unhappy and entrenched in the shame of their precalamity mistakes like purah and zelda become active, beloved members of their communities. we see the people of lurelin village take back and rebuild their destroyed home. we watch this kingdom and its people make an unprecedented comeback after a century of struggle and ruin.

Similarly, totk's gameplay is LINK's second chance, his comeback from the initial mistake of losing zelda, of specifically being unable to reach her with his injured hand when they fell. The consequences of that--the master sword's corruption, the loss of his arm, and zelda's draconification, are all supposed to SEEM irreversible, because that's how LINK initially sees them. he believes that he doomed both himself and zelda all because of that SINGLE moment in which he wasn't enough, a viewpoint which is obviously left over from the pressure he experienced to perform to an impossible standard of perfection pre-calamity. The story of totk is about deconstructing that belief and proving it wrong. the mistake he made caused harm, but it's never too late to repair things. he can fix the regional phenomena ganondorf causes and rebuild those communities. he can revitalize the master sword. he can GET ZELDA BACK, with his own arm, uninjured and able to reach her this time. no matter how impossible those things may initially seem, no matter the perceived finality of his mistakes and their consequences, there is always hope. there is always a second chance. no one person's single mistake can doom an entire kingdom for eternity. the fate of hyrule was NEVER resting on link's shoulders alone. he was never their final hope. there was always going to be an after. the whole POINT of the draconification and the loss of link's arm is that they AREN'T final. they ARE inconsequential, because they were born of one mistake and ONE MISTAKE IS NOT THE END ALL.

#like. think about the message the game sends if zelda stays a dragon. we are saying that link CAN'T come back from this mistake.#that one single split-second moment in which he made the wrong move because he had no way of knowing what to do #means that the one person who understands and supports him above all else. the one person who shares his experience and his trauma #the woman he LOVES. is gone forever with no hope of return ever and it's 100% his fault.#that's not true to the themes of botw OR totk. these games are about growth and healing and second chances.#this game was link learning that he gets a second chance. that no move he makes is the final be-all-end-all fuckup.#it removes the pressure and that's the POINT. for a character like link whose life has been DEFINED by pressure #who was taught from a horrifically young age that any wrong move on his part would KILL EVERYONE HE KNEW AND LOVED #this is such an important lesson to learn. removing that pressure/showing him that it was never actually real in the first place #is a crucial step towards healing for him.#asks #zelda analysis #totk spoilers #like i like the idea of lasting consequences dont get me wrong. <draconic features zelda enjoyer #but like. making link keep the fucking rauru arm rubs me the wrong way. the whole point is that he caught her with his own hand in the end #ugh. anyway. you get the idea

231 notes · View notes

ra-vio · 1 year

Text

I'm finally replaying Spirit Tracks

#loz #legend of zelda #spirit tracks #toon link #toon zelda #princess zelda #I think the last time I FINISHED spirit tracks was in 2013 which is almost 10 years ago #i'm replaying it now in hopes of finishing it again. it is literally link's first day holding a sword #im already thinking of the option of whether he stays an engineer or becomes a knight #boy trained to be an engineer. he wanted to drive trains. why would i take that from him #but also why not both #now that i think of it alfonzo could have given him basic sword training #you ever think of how link always leaves after his adventure cause his life is so different now #so many of them just leave the country.#well if this one leaves the country guess what he can take on his way out?#but also they give you the option of not knowing what to choose #and giving me that option while I was in high school? so true lmao

813 notes · View notes

merrysithmas · 1 year

Text

me when someone says luke is a bad teacher and made grogu "choose" btw being a jedi and his dad:

what he did was ensure grogu could one day be a jedi AND have his dad now!!!

#bruh....#he said grogu's HEART wasnt in it #then created a child-appropriate scenario where grogu would be free to choose his dad with no ill will #realizing of course the love between grogu and din and feeling compassion as he loved and misses his own father so dearly #and he has a new Order where he will allow those attachments #only to hope one day (perhaps even after his own death) grogh would return to complete his trainjng #KNOWING he would never be able to do so if he isnt ALLOWED TO LOVE HIS DAD NOW WHILE HE HAS HIM #which was the OPPOSITE OF THE OLD ORDER AND THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT THE JEDI DID TO ANAKIN AND SHMI #luke skywalker is WISE and compassionate #he totally understood grogu #he said you may never see the mandalorian again- your training may take you elsewhere your bond may be frayed #and its true #maybe din would die on his own without grogu's help #which would have happened several times already in s1-2 #LUKE GETS IT #anyway #dinluke #luke skywalker #i mean im not defending favloni bc they have no idea what theyre doing #but i dont think this was ooc as per luke's outlook on his new jedi ordee #order #din grogu #what he did was ENSURE GROGU COULD HAVE THE JEDI AND HIS DAD!!!

328 notes · View notes

hanzajesthanza · 3 days

Text

i tend to talk a lot about the realistic nature of the witcher, its "realistic fantasy," "brutal realism," its references to political realities and inspirations taken from history, and that is all very important to it.

but... i also want to take a moment to say that the witcher, as a tragedy, also fills me with a hope... that such love, such beautiful families and friendships can exist, even if they differ too much to survive in the end. the idea that the beauty and purity of that love even exists at all, in such a fucked up world, despite it and sometimes existing in the very middle of it, is also what makes it realistic. hope is realistic. love is realistic.

#because it is also their love which dooms them in the end.#the close sense of understanding and BELONGING i hope to truly know one day #yennefer kills herself wretchedly trying to save (resurrect) geralt. because she loved him. like in a fairy tale.#the hanza all die out of love for each other and for ciri and for geralt #and it is out of nimue's love for the legend that we know its true ending #only out of her devotion to it was its ending found.#hm... only those who seek shall find.#what did sapkowski say about her... she is separated from the legend by time but her love connects her with it #the elbow-high diaries #the witcher books

47 notes · View notes

girlgerard · 6 months

Text

mommm white people on tumblr are misconstruing my posts again despite the post being entirely about how important wording is + how i don’t feel comfortable posting large statements when i haven’t fully processed them yet.

#if you want to put me on a blocklist for loving netanyahu you can! i don’t! and no matter how many times i get told i do #i still don’t!#i literally said i hope his balls get cut off IN THAT POST #i don’t know how that read as unclear.#perhaps there are no hidden genocidal messages behind the wording of my tumblr posts - who knows!#when i said i cared about every single civilian living in that land i meant it. if you decide that i actually don’t that’s not my problem #if you somehow took my words and decided that what i really meant is that i’m a government bootlicker who loves murder #you can do that all you want. it won’t make it true and it won’t help save any lives #i was in ramallah and jerusalem six months ago. have you gone?#if the answer is no maybe think about that for a second #moreover if you’re viewing this from a purely racial or religious framework you have no idea how to navigate this subject #i don’t view israel and palestine through which government i want to back. why the fuck would i do that #palestinians and jews and everyone else in that land is who i care about. i care about gazans #if that’s not enough of ‘a side’ for you i don’t really think there’s much of a conversation to be had.#do you think i wake up every day NOT thinking about gaza? do you think i wouldn’t feel nauseous every second of every day because of gaza?#do you think that within everything i’m saying that the most logical conclusion would be to post all of my thoughts on tumblr?#because if you think any of that we’re not going to have a productive conversation. i don’t take kindly to being told my own emotions

70 notes · View notes

nerdreid · 19 days

Text

i don't really go here so feel free to push back on this but. as funny as the "i'm an ally!" line is i also think it's such an interesting manifestation of the specific struggle buck has with his sexuality. like, he's not using it as an identifier label for his identity per se. it's more of a deflection/denial of the root of his discomfort.

it was already clear at the restaurant but it became so evident in his conversation with maddie. buck was clearly nervous about going on a date with a guy, he had never done that before, and when eddie walked in he panicked even harder, lying about it being a date. and he feels so bad about it. but despite mentioning himself that it's his first date with a dude, he can't seem to make the connection that that's where his reaction is coming from. "so why do you think you did that [lying to eddie]" "i don't know"

because he's an ally! he's cool with gay people! so the not-straight thing cannot possibly be the problem. "shouldn't be, right?" he has a hard time grappling with how he feels and how this might change things for him. and i just want to grab him by the shoulders and tell him that it's okay to feel weird about your own newfound queerness. these are your feelings, it's new, it's different. being okay with yourself is a whole different beast than being okay with others.

#this is a ramble and i hope it makes sense #cause i have soo many thought about this #911 #911 abc #evan buckley #seen a lot of people make the comparison with imogen from heartstopper #and while yes very funny and also very true #i also think there is a different way they utilise it #like imogens was very 'im an ally i cant be homophobic' while buck is more like 'im an ally gayness isn't weird so that cant be the bit im #uncomfortable about right not. must be something else'#i also have to be honest i only watched the first season of 911 and the recent episodes. the rest i only know through timeline osmosis #but i think i have a decent read on this #which. i love buck so much this is such a great bit of (disaster cringefail) bi rep

21 notes · View notes

mel-loly · 1 month

Text

-Happy Easter..💛

#hi! so.... I'm going to say something different today. just so you don't ““insult”” me and say that I say the same thing every year!/j #for those who don't know. both the bunny and the chocolate egg have a true and also christian meaning!#being that of the egg: “eggs symbolize rebirth and renewal. which makes them perfect for celebrating the story of jesus’ resurrection.”#and the bunny: “the animal was associated with easter because it reproduces quickly and symbolizes fertility and new life.”#(I took this two from a google search. being it in the PORTUGUESE version. so I just translated it.#if you want to look for it in real english. look for it!)#so... it's okay if you want to give someone a chocolate egg or something like that. give a stuffed bunny to a child or someone too.#because there's really no problem #not only because of the real meaning. but there is no reason not to give as a gift something that is also special for that day.#and it's also cute gifts!#just.. DON'T MAKE IT A “SORRY EXCUSE” TO NOT CELEBRATE WHAT THE HOLIDAY REALLY IS!#which is the resurrection of christ! who died on the cross for all of us. ok!?#and yeah.. well. I'm leaving! I hope you have a great day and a blessed easter!! love you all!💛#happy easter #easter #easter art #i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog #art #my art #my art <3 #art mel #my art style #my oc character #mel creator #resurrection of jesus #resurrection of christ #bible verse

24 notes · View notes

wi1dshxpe · 2 months

Text

i just think it’s so sick and twisted gortash canonically has abs. like him being hairy isn’t enough i also need him to be fat. it’s like when people make mods that smooth out his old ass face or whiten his yellow ass teeth, but it’s real. i need to see his muffin top more than i need to see anything else in this game.

#enver gortash #durgetash #i did not care about him at all my first run i was like ‘old man anime boy- boring- whatever- i like the lobster suit lady more’ and moved #on. it took playing durge for me to be like 'actually i gotta worship this man's hairy bhaals i think' which is the correct way to go for a #character. he's whatever then you learn about his history with your player character and you're like 'okayy. listening- seated- on my #knees- you already know what i'm doing down there.' in reality his shitty hair cut and yellow ass teeth are entirely what makes him hot and #that would entirely be elevated by a fat stomach i don't make the rules. this is also true of halsin. actually no party member should have #muscles they should just varying amounts stomach fat to attend to MY preferences exclusively. hope this helps!

21 notes · View notes

lifeonmvrs · 3 months

Text

happy apollo justice hd trilogy release day to those who celebrate hehe‼️🎉

[Image Description: a digital drawing of apollo justice from ace attorney. he is visible from his knees up and is playing video games. he is sitting cross-legged with his body bent forward as he is concentrating and clearly struggling. some sweat drops are falling down his forehead and cheek. there’s some text on the top reading “happy apollo justice trilogy release day :3 [cat face emoticon]” and dialogue text reading “i’m fine!”. the background is a blueish light purple gradient. /end ID]

#i had to do this one quickly bc i had nothing prepared for today lol #i am not playing the game yet bc i haven’t even finished to original trilogy so yeah #i got back into ace attorney recently so expect some drawing from that ig #also expect more drawings bc i am FREE FROM SCHOOL 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#so that’s great #anyway #instagram restricted my account and i am SO mad #it’s been days and i still don’t know what i did wrong or if i even did something wrong #i already reported it bc my account status says i have access to ALL functions of instagram like commenting liking posts etc #which is not true but aaghhh #i hope that gets solved soon #apollo justice #apollo justice fanart #aj trilogy #capcom #fanart #ace attorney #ace attorney fanart #aa #art #digital art #digital artist #has id #described #my art

24 notes · View notes

natasha-in-space · 9 months

Note

hi:) um can i ask a slightly angst fic where the reader don't have a job because of her social anxiety and so she's v embarrassed when talking with people and when she joins RFA even more so cuz they're all successful and busy. Can you make it slight Seven/MC? I hope that's okay 🙃

"You feeling okay?"

You jolted, feeling like your heart was just about to jump straight out of your chest with how hard it was pounding against your ribcage. Really, it was silly of you to react like that. The party venue was full of attractive people dressed in fancy evening attire: dancing, laughing, drinking, and networking. As a party coordinator, it was a given for someone to eventually start up a conversation with you. And yet... No matter how hard your brain tried to rationalize every little thing around you, it never truly helped.

You didn't belong here. All of these people... Hell, even the rest of the RFA! They held themselves up with such confidence, they talked with such grace and they didn't have to worry about their standing at all. And, who were you? Just an anxious mess who couldn't even function properly in a completely normal social interaction. What were you even doing here-?

You swiftly turned around, meeting a pair of golden eyes staring right at you behind his signature glasses. Seven... Speaking of, you didn't even see him since the party started. Did he notice how pale your face has gotten? How tightly your fingers gripped the champagne glass you didn't drink from even once ever since you first took it from the tray to busy your trembling hands with something? How your breathing was too shallow and quick to satisfy your desperate need for fresh air in your lungs? You hoped not.

Say something-!

"I- Uh-" You barely managed to choke out, your throat closing in before you could utter a single word, your mind feeling like it was too overwhelmed and underwhelmed at the same time. There were too many eyes, too many people, too many voices. It was too bright, too loud, too crowded. Your clothes were too tight, the fabric was too itchy, and your skin was too clammy. It was all... too much.

"I- I'm fine."

You were obviously not fine.

Seven's brows furrowed, though you barely registered it through the panicked fog that took over all of your senses. And, even if you did notice it, you'd probably think that he assumed you were weird and off-putting or something. That's what you would have thought of yourself in his shoes, anyway. You knew you were failing this, and failing this miserably... You knew you needed to get out of here, you knew you needed some peace and quiet to ground yourself, and yet-

And yet, you were too damn frozen to do anything. Your body and mind were begging you for an escape, but they didn't let you do anything to achieve that escape. What kind of sick joke is that?

"...C'mon." You didn't even detect Seven's voice in your ears. You just gasped as you felt someone gently nudge your arm and start leading you away. So, you stumbled along, your breathing shallow and your legs tripping over themselves as you were being led down the dimly lit corridor somewhere you couldn't see. He was quiet as you two walked alongside each other, his grip on your arm tightening from time to time to keep you steady, making occasional small pauses for you to regain your footing.

You wouldn't notice any of these small details until much, much later, once your mind had cleared up again.

Finally, you briefly heard the sound of a door opening, before a rush of fresh air hit you right in the face, almost making you choke on it from the pure abruptness of it. You didn't even notice how stuffy it was on the inside until you got a taste of what it was like on the outside. Two warm hands lightly pushed you down, and you let them, feeling yourself being seated onto a small wooden bench. It felt so good to no longer have to stand and keep your weight up. You let your head lean back as you closed your eyes and let yourself finally breathe.

God, each breath of fresh night air felt like true paradise right now.

A few minutes passed by until you felt yourself slowly coming back to earth, more or less. You still felt anxious and incredibly tired, your heart racing on the inside of your chest. But, at least you could move again, albeit shakily. You could speak. You could see. You could breathe.

Speaking of... You quickly turned your attention to a fellow redheaded RFA member that was sitting beside you, his gaze turned upwards towards the night sky.

"...Seven?" You decided to say something, your voice weak and raspy.

He turned his attention back towards you, a warm smile gracing his features. It was strange. You knew Seven wasn't all jokes and laughter, but you also weren't expecting him to be so... caring once you finally met him face-to-face. It made your heart race for a different reason from before.

"Are you feeling better now? I can bring you some water if you want." He replied, holding your nervous gaze.

Why are you so nice to me...? You wanted to ask, as you hang your head low, starting to anxiously fiddle with the ends of your outfit. Instead, you just shook your head. "A-A bit later. I'm... Uh..."

"You're not ready to go back out there. I get it." He finished your train of thought for you, returning his gaze toward the sky. It made you breathe a small sigh of relief, grateful to be free of any kind of attention right now.

Wait... Did he do it on purpose-?

"I... I'm sorry." You mumbled, biting onto your lower lip. "I should be there right now, talking with our guests and making sure the party is a success... And yet, here I am. Some kind of party coordinator I am."

Your words were laced with bitterness and frustration, centered around nobody but yourself. All you wanted was to be... normal. To stop feeling like every single person in the room hated your guts for simply existing. To be able to function properly. Why was it so goddamn hard!?

Seven sighed, glancing at you briefly before looking away once again. He seemed to be thinking about what to say to you. You never thought you'd see him not knowing how to reply to something. He was always so energetic and all over the place in the chatrooms or on the calls with you... But, this side of him was... new.

You appreciated seeing it.

"It's... terrifying to try and act tough when you feel like there is danger waiting on every turn. You have to pretend that everything's going great when all you really want to do is to run and hide yourself away somewhere nobody could ever find you." He started slowly, carefully. Almost like he was thinking over every single word he spoke, cautious not to say too much. You wondered what it was that he was avoiding so meticulously. "I saw that look in your eyes, and I knew what you were feeling on the inside. It's a look I... Well, let's just say, it's not something unfamiliar to me."

You were surprised to hear that. Seven? Being familiar with such anxiety? The same Seven who would laugh the loudest out of everyone in the group, or make a fool of himself with a confident grin on his face? You found it hard to believe.

He continued his line of thought before you could question it, though.

"Listen... I know you feel like you don't belong. And, I mean... I can understand that." He chuckled, shaking his head a little. "Practically everyone in our group is impressive in one way or another. Some, in ways a normal person couldn't even imagine. It would be pretty overwhelming to anybody to get thrown into your position."

You furrowed your brows, your fingers stopping their fiddling as you got too focused on your own thoughts. "A normal person wouldn't freeze up at a party that they themselves are supposed to be responsible for. Or fail at keeping a job for any longer than a month without completely breaking down."

"None of this could be possible without you joining the RFA, Y/N." Seven replied, now looking straight at you, his expression oddly serious. He just continued to surprise you the more time you spent together. "I know more about you than I should. I'm not... proud of it, but the least I can do is use this knowledge to help you. I know you struggle with some things. And yes, you did get too overwhelmed there. But, everything's okay now. The party is a success. Thanks to you. Thanks for your efforts. Nothing is ruined. The guests are happy, and we raised a lot of money that will be used for a good cause to those who are in need. Rika's legacy continues. None of this could be possible without you. Don't belittle yourself for this."

You just stared at him, not knowing what to say. Not knowing what you could say. You could feel tears welling up in the corners of your eyes as you swallowed the lump forming in the middle of your throat. "But... But I-"

"You're a member of the RFA, Y/N. Whatever struggles you're going through... We're all going to be there for you when you need it. In fact, I'm sure everyone is very worried about you right now." He gave you a small reassuring smile, patting you on the shoulder. "Don't be afraid to rely on us. Just like everyone relied on you. We're here for you. And... I'm here for you, too."

You would hold onto those words. Just like you found yourself holding onto his arm for the rest of the night, finding his warm presence warming and reassuring.

You weren't alone in this. And, even though you had no idea what you were doing, you knew you had people who would always be there to catch you when you fell.

#mystic messenger #mysmes #mysme #mm #saeyoung choi #choi saeyoung #707 #luciel choi #saeyoung x reader #707 x reader #tw social anxiety #i hope you like it anon <3 #i struggled a lot with social anxiety so it's always very special to write works concerning it #being a party coordinator would be stressful for us #especially in a group of such talented individuals #but they love you #just like you love them #i know for a fact they would be there for us when it all gets too overwhelming to handle alone #i do hope saeyoung is not too ooc here! it's always a bit difficult to write his softer side which making him feel true to his canon self #i feel like he'd be very understanding and caring when it comes to these things (if not a bit awkward)#after all he helped saeran many times during their childhood #and i'm sure his time in the agency affected his handling of such situations too

89 notes · View notes

eyrieofsynapses · 11 months

Text

good evening, all. it is May the 25th. our lilacs are blooming, just as the ones at the Watch House did. and I am thinking about remembrance of the fallen, and GNU, and the love in commemoration.

y'know, I read Night Watch… oh, maybe a year ago and some months ago. and the lilac symbolism, the remembrance of the Watch, has always struck me with the depth of the emotion of it, the tangibility of it in the flowers. but I wasn't aware that today was the day until I saw commemorative posts, all that gorgeous artwork and more, on my dash.

I was also not aware, until now, that fans commemorated the day not only because of the book reference, but in support of Terry Pratchett and of those with Alzheimer's. which knocked me over a bit because of course, of course the group that would use GNU to honor him would do that. and… I've been thinking about GNU a lot, lately, and this caught me again.

I read Going Postal a bit ago, and reread it recently. both times, the parts about GNU made me tear up. this idea of the names, the memories, the lives of the clacks workers who dedicated themselves to ensuring that people heard each other's voices—all those names spoken again and again and again by that which they poured their souls into, winging along in the air as they could not, an eternal reminder that they were loved—how could that not touch a person's heart?

when I found out that fans online used it to memorialize him, I damn well cried. hell, I still tear up just thinking about it. do you know, there's a code for an HTTP header "X-Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett" written by Reddit users to put in webpages, where it goes unseen by the average user? and in 2015, when Netcraft took a survey, there were eighty-four thousand websites using it? it's eight years later—how many thousands upon thousands of websites have this now, do you think? how many little cables of light has his name flown along, now? how many times?

that alone is absurdly and unimaginably lovely in its own right, but… there's something else to it. there's something about remembering with the lilac sprigs every year, just as Vimes and those who were there remembered their dead. something about how, when we take up our lilac sprigs, we carry a little piece of the characters in our hearts, too. I kept trying to put my finger on why that makes me tear up the way it does. the conclusion I came to is this:

what greater way to honor a writer is there, but to honor them the way they did the characters they poured their heart and soul into? what better way to say we know you and you are not forgotten and your work and words and gifts to the world are held in our hearts forever than to remember them by their own words, their own vision? how else could we say you embodied all the good you believed in and wished to see in the world, but to memorialize them after the little pieces of their soul they wrapped in ink and put upon the page?

it is a knowing of the writer, to remember them in their way. it is not a worn-out faceless platitude, but a reminder that their work has been read and will continue to be, that the characters and world they loved enough to bring to life last just as their name does. such remembrance is warm and loving and delights in their memory even as it grieves.

and now Pratchett's name has been written in his tradition, over and over and over, across the vast plane of the Internet, where it will—with any luck—continue to fly for generations to come.

there is no way to truly express the beauty of that… but perhaps we can catch a glimpse of it in the lilacs, both ours and the Watch's.

#the glorious 25th of may #night watch #gnu terry pratchett #discworld #I cannot express how much I love that our lilacs bloom at the same time as they do in the books #also I dearly wanted to include this little fact in my accidental monologue but it didn't fit. so in the tags it goes:#GNU Terry Pratchett is ALSO a Minecraft splash text #which is just. aaaaaaaaaaah of course a game with something like the End Poem would do that but aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah #I have many feelings on this and a decent summary of a lot of them is about the beauty of how humanity remembers and loves our dead #and also just... the love. the love that can be held for someone you never met #but whose writing and words can pierce your heart in the best of ways #and the love for characters--for the best of them are these little shards of the writer's soul that they decided to share #because that's really the nature of writing. baring your soul and your self to others in those persons you breathe to life on the page #and then sharing it with others just in hopes that it might ring true and inspire them #give them insight #help them in ways no one else could because only YOU could write that character and share that part of yourself #and by gods if Pratchett isn't among the best at that then I don't know who is #anyway. I have feelings and I accidentally turned them into a monologue whoo #have a good evening all

134 notes · View notes