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frecklystars · 3 months

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Don’t get me wrong I love Ryan Gosling’s Ken more than I love anyone else rn. I owe that character my life. I genuinely would not have lived through the last 6 months if I didn’t have that movie breathing life back into me when I was at my lowest point, he’s my number one go-to character when my flashbacks are happening and when I need support. I would genuinely have died without this guy and his dozen characters to keep me going and helping me feel safe self shipping again

But how the fuck did Ryan get nominated for an Oscar for being a supporter to Barbie while Margot Robbie whomst IS Barbie, she is EVERYTHING… did not…???? 😭😭 How did Greta Gerwig not get nominated for best director when she made history being the first and only female director to break the biggest opening at the box office????? What the fresh fuck is this

Ryan said himself it’s Barbie AND Ken… there is no Just Ken………………

The Barbie movie would not have happened if Margot didn’t get the rights to Barbie and trust Greta 100%. Nobody believed in this movie more than Margot did, because she believed in Greta, she knew it would be a powerful film. It would not have been half the story that it is if Greta didn’t direct this movie. Greta and Margot are the reason this movie 1) exists in the first place and 2) the reason the movie is as incredible as it is. Not to mention Margot had to convince Mattel that they needed to get comfortable with the idea of being uncomfortable. They were allowed to get away with SO MUCH because Margot is an artist at putting her 110% into everything she does and that includes getting Mattel to allow any of this to exist in the first place when they are so careful with Barbie.

Margot and Greta are literally everything. Ryan is JUST. KEN. THAT HAS BEEN THE ENTIRE FUCKING POINT

#I’m torn dude I’m so happy for Ryan but I’m like. devastated I feel like this was the whole point of the movie #BEHIND EVERY GREAT BARBIE THERE IS A KEN AND HES TOTALLY FINE WITH THAT.#KEN BEING BY HIMSELF ISNT WHAT HES USED TO!!!!!!#KEN NEEDS HIS BARBIE!!!!!! DO NOT SEPARATE THEM?????#i was hoping he’d sing at the Oscar’s but I don’t know if he’d be willing to do that now.#idk if he’d be comfortable bc he’s already only doing all of this for Greta and Margot #and what is the point if Margot isn’t recognized as Barbie… in her own Barbie Movie™️#and if Greta isn’t recognized for all of her hard work and how this movie would not have been possible or GOOD without HER!!!!!#I AM THE BIGGEST KEN FAN AND SUPPORTER AND LOVER. BUT. I AM UPSET #HIS WHOLE CHARACTER IS HIM BEING JUST SOME GUY 😭#AND THE WOMEN DID NOT GET RECOGNIZED AT ALL????#well america got nominated. I’m happy for her. but oh my god #greta is the one who wrote her big speech!!!!! where is greta!!!!!!#barbie itself got nominated BUT NOT THE PEOPLE WHO MADE THIS MOVIE?????#I’m sleep deprived I’m not wording myself as well as I normally would but god.#AUGH #woof

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nagitoedit · 7 months

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since im thinking about just know this: every time you defend biden at all even just say he isnt doing anything bad it makes me want to kill you in the most excessively tortuous way possible

#like as someone who is right where the mvp is. this fucking sucks and i hope redacted redacted redacted redacted #like mvp is stealing peoples property and destroying it not an exaggeration. peoples lives are being directly ruined by this thing #and the ecological destruction that is happening is just. its excessive ! like i dont want a pipeline here but theyre doing it so badly #its like theyre purposefully trying to make this as ecologically devastating as possible.#theyre fucking up rivers destroying forests blowing up underground caves <- REAL EXAMPLES #they have literally caused irreversible ecological damage !! every time you say biden isnt that bad i get more suicidal #mypost

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lev1hei1chou · 7 months

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Why i believe Gojo could come back

This chapter left us in a devastated state and was absolutely uncalled for, but I personally believe this isnt the end of the strongest sorcerer. There are several reasons as to why (These are just opinions, I could be wrong in certain areas AND personal feelings might make an occassional appearance.)

LEAKS:

This whole panel was obviously made for a reason. And we dont see gojo making a decision. Considering the fact that this is literally THE Gojo Satoru, he's more likely to choose north since there's numerous things left as plot holes. We'll get to that.

Here in this page, he mentions that Toji should've cut his head off to actually kill him. In the leaks, whats cut off is his upper body but not the head! I still can't quite wrap my head around RCT but lets say he's not able to heal himself. You know who can and who would? Yuta and Shoko

Now moving on

"Gojo then bids farewell to everyone." If hes truly gone then why would he be bidding farewell to the fallen comrades? If he's dead then isn't he supposed to stay in the afterlife with them?

Pretty self explanatory

What if Kashimo is going in to distract Sukuna while Shoko and Yuta can heal Gojo?

Now think about this. Gojo is gone, Shoko doesnt fight and who are all left? A bunch of sorcerers who are literally under 20, need guidance and we havent really seen any panel where they actually plan how they're going to go about in the whole battle. Gojo isnt a want, hes a NEED, a NECESSITY.

Remember, Toji who was dead long ago pretty much appeared out of nowhere in Shibuya Arc LMAO so- yes

WHAT IS THIS EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN

Theres no way Gojo would be left sealed for 3 whole years, brought him back just to kill him off in the most disrespectful way possible.

Besides, things that Gojo wanted to do haven't happened yet.

He wanted to tell megumi about his father

He wanted to see his students surpass the strongest sorcerer, aka him

He wanted to get rid of the higher ups

He wanted to properly mourn suguru (for which kenjaku has to be defeated but oh well)

He wanted to save Megumi

How'd we know what Gojo said here.

On to the other aspects of why killing off Gojo was a bad idea. We barely ever saw what happened to him, and an off screen death to the so called strongest sorcerer is just senseless. Gojo is a fan favourite. People started watching the show for Gojo (myself included) and there's a high possibility of multiple people dropping the manga since he isn't even there anymore.

The ending could take a turn for the worse considering the fact that Sukuna is just overpowered and Kenjaku hasn't done anything as of now. Unless there's some heavy plot armor I dont think the students even stand a chance against Sukuna and Kenjaku. Both outcomes- the students and others emerging as victors or sukuna emerging as a victor could make the ending absolutely terrible and this might as well top AOT for being the manga with the most disliked ending.

Gojo Satoru is the mentor for multiple; for Yuji, Nobara, Megumi, Yuta, Maki, Panda, Toge and the third years and its necessary for them to have someone to teach them. It is one of Satoru's wishes to see his students surpass him, which can happen only when he's there since there's nobody else who is actually capable of teaching them and leading them into the world as actual graduated sorcerers.

So Gojo dying will make the manga take a turn for the worse. Killing him off in the middle makes absolutely no sense and is just plain bad writing. People are prolly gonna kill me for this but lets admit the truth. Hyping this battle, building up tension just to finish him off screen is NOT good writing.

Anyways. There is factual proof of Gojo potentially making a return. Maybe at a cost, like him losing his power, losing his "strongest" title or anything else. He may not even be the same anymore but honestly as long as he's back, I'm fine.

It happened previously, and could happen again.

Satoru Gojo may not be the strongest and the honoured one, but may be reborn as a newer version of himself after getting humbled. Lotuses, as mentioned above symbolise rebirth, which is why i believe this is not the end.

A small bit of advice for gojo fans: Go watch haikyuu or highschool babysitters as a form of self care <3

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likeadevils · 5 days

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what songs from TTPD and TA are now yours? Which ones have spoken to you the most?

songs that are genuinely MINE

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus: i cried myself to sleep listening to this song on repeat on release night and for the life of me i cant tell you why. i think it’s a great example of her being older really deepening her writing— just that old scarred over longing of a possible life, a possible love, too far away to reach but close enough to brush past. also, the double edged sword of “if you want to break my cold, cold heart, just say’ i loved you the way that you were’”— you loved me before i’d twisted myself into the shape i am now in order to keep my current partner, but also, you loved me the way i was, not the way i am now

i look in peoples windows: i wrote a poem with the line “im afflicted by the not knowing” in it!! inspired by the outside!! and by spending so much of my childhood reading by moonlight and spying on my neighbors through their windows!!! it was called where midnight lives!!! what the fuck!!!

robin: another song i sobbed hysterically to. i was a strange little violent child obsessed with dinosaurs it feels like a lullaby someone made specifically about 3 year old me.

songs that i’m obsessed with:

but daddy i love him: the bridge is just so fun to scream along to. everytime ive been in a car since the album came out ive played this at least two times just cause

fresh out the slammer: it’s just. the first verse??? the way the song stutters apart for the last verse??? this song takes the blurry muse conceit of the album and uses it to its fullest. also just the diminishing returns from “but its gonna be alright, i did my time”

i can do it with a broken heart: my first listen favorite

the smallest man who ever lived: the bridge????? the bridge???? the bridge???? a few of the negative reviews specifically mentioned this song as boring and for a millisecond i was so angry i could’ve exploded

the black dog: this is like, the platonic ideal of a taylor swift song to me. just that old quiet tragedy she can build out of little moments of hoping your ex will remember you when they hear your favorite song or not having known your last kiss was your last kiss or your ex still sharing their location with you. like, it’s just her at her best, but with the maturity to sing “and you jump up, but she’s too young to know this song”

i hate it here: people have talked about seeing reputation in the anthology but i think you can also see so much debut and it makes me feel so tender. also i genuinely don’t understand why people don’t like “if chose the 1830s but without all the racists” like?? it’s supposed to be a bit clunky?? the songs about the limits of escapism?? the line enhances both of those themes?? also “i’m there most of the year” is such a funny devastating relatable lyric to say about a daydream

thank you aimee: it’s not every day a song inspires you to send this message about something a child did to you (fuck you madeline!!! fuck you jessie!!!)

the bolter: avoidant attachment representation!!! i love that it takes the stuff she hated about herself in the archer and just accepts and loves them and appreciates what they’ve given her. i especially love it because bolt can mean like, crossbow bolts, so it’s a flip on the archer. also “bolt” is one of my favorite words i love all the different meanings

“the only thing that’s left is the manuscript, one less souvenir from my trip to your shores, now and then i re-read the manuscript, but the story isnt mine anymore” also just had me sobbing. there’s just. wtf!!!!!!

#asks*

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amozon28 · 1 year

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something im really enjoying about the events happening in the latest chapters is that because Twilight isnt able to get involved because he isnt being informed and hes a full city away. is that in the aftermath hes going to be confronted with his two ideologies clashing. because yes, hes a spy that prioritizes getting the mission done for the greater good, his greater good being creating a world were kids wont have to cry alone like he did. in this stance his and WISE goals align. however he also cares about children on the micro level. he cares about the safety and well being of each kid he comes across. and this comes into direct conflict with WISE, who are willing to disregard the safety of kids if it doesnt help aide them in their greater plans of peace

Here WISE not caring about a busload of kids. saying that the police can handle this. and this is something Twilight himself tried (and ultimately failed to do) to prioritize his mission over the safety of one child when Anya was kidnapped in the beginning of the story.

Had it not been for the fact that Anya and Damian were on that bus, which jeopardized Operation Strix, WISE would have left it to the police. which isnt a bad thing its just where WISE and Twilight's desires dont always agree.

So when Twilight finally does learn about what happened with the bus and Anya hes going to be DEVASTATED. because as Twilight he was useless, being on a different mission, and a Wise agent he was useless, by not having a buss full of kids be on WISE radar. Hes Westalias GREATEST spy and he couldnt protect his little girl when she needs him most. thats going to HURT him, especially a man who tries to control and account for every possible outcome and blames himself for every failing.

however where hes going to fail as a Spy i feel like hes going to be reminded that being a spy isnt the only way to protect and make Anya feel safe.

Twilights mother wasnt a soldier or combat vet or spy or anyone of note. she wasnt someone who could physically protect twilight from the bombs raining down on them every night. yet as a child he felt SAFE with his mother because he inspired that feeling in him just by being there for him. sure it was a false sense of security, but as a child thats all he needed. and its still true to him years later as an adult when he cant even remember his mothers face, he still remembers how safe she made him feel in those scary moments.

and i think post this arc Twilight is going to be reminded how important this kind of strength will be for Anya. because while he couldnt protect her from the terrorists, or the bombs or the SSS police, he can hold her and comfort her and tell her “everything is going to be ok” as she falls alseep.

honestly i wouldnt be surprised if this arc ended with Anya asking if she can sleep is Papa’s bed with him because she doesnt want to sleep alone. and Twilight letting her, remembering how it made him feel as a child, and allowing Anya into his room, being another metaphor for slowly letting his walls.down.

because sure he failed to protect Anya as the spy Twilght, but he will succeed to protect her as her father Loid. because “Thats the sort of strength that will finish the job”

#loid forger #spy x family #spy x family spoilers #spy x family manga #anya forger #sxf #sxf manga #sxf manga spoilers #sxf spoilers #spy x family chapter 71 #mine #sxf commentary

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kidflashimpulse · 3 months

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Hi! So, question about Bart.( This will kind of disregard canon since I haven’t watched the show in forever, sorry in advance). What do you think about Bart’s opinion on death and killing? Like, do you think he might have killed reach soldiers before? Or, like, could have helped someone, but didn’t because of his own need to survive? I belief he would always help as much as possible but...

what about criminals?? What if, say, they are dealing with a bunch of human traffickers, and they say stuff that reminds him so much about his childhood! Like, he doesn’t get pleasure out of killing. But maybe he sees it in a strategic light? “ if I end this now, they won’t ever hurt anyone the way I was hurt. They would just pay their way out of prison..”

I just want to see a moment where his good heart + morals (taught by his family and other heroes) clash with his apathetic mindset from living in an apocalyptic world were humans are at their lowest. Plus, he’s smart enough (and fast enough) to make it look like an accident....

u’ve always got the most amazing questions which i’m so grateful for omg <333 thank you for the ask 🙏❤️

so first on bart’s opinion on death and killing /killed reach soldiers / or whether to help ppl at risk of his own survival :

very interesting scenarios that u’ve outlined !!! especially since yes i have SO MANY HCs about this 😭 some of which I plan to refer to in a Owen + Bart centric fic connecting to allusions of Barts past that i’ve hinted at in AAIT, so i won’t go into detail about those. But i’ll give an overall answer of the HCs that i have ! I do think he’s killed people like reach soldiers and that he hasn’t thought twice about it because it’s a natural kill or be killed scenario for him and the ppl of his time. I think he would be significantly more impacted by not being able to help ppl that he could’ve “possibly” helped but couldn’t/didn’t. I agree that he’s got that somewhat natural heroic tendency to him of wanting to help where he can so if he’s prevented from doing that, he would feel responsible and devastated by it. I think death and killing is such a prominent occurrence in his time that as typically establishes by most he’s been pretty desensitised to it, so even if he would feel sad or bad about something, i think he’s capable of moving on from it fairly easily that it doesn’t affect him to the point of say how the deaths have affected Gar in the show. As a very vague spoiler to my HCs that i plan to write about, everyone he’s killed isnt solely restricted to reach soldiers. Regardless of different HCs of anyone, i think it’s unavoidable to consider that bart has had at least a very strong exposure to death and killing, resulting in his desensitisation, which i would say is what we can assume from canon.

in terms of how his morality plays in and how this relates to things like criminals or ppl that remind him of his past like human traffickers: i think the biggest indicator of his character to answer ur question is that he befriended Jaime of all things, rather than just straight up try to kill him 😂 Like u said, it would be incredibly easy for him to just do it, so if he didn’t kill the guy who practically brought on the Reach apocalypse, the literal main reason why he’s in the present in the first place, then I really don’t see him being “triggered” in any sense to kill any criminal that they might encounter just for the sake of stopping criminality. Now i’m terms of in the moment survival where there’s quite literally no other choice, i don’t think it would be much of a dilemma for him at all in comparison to other heroes. But for the sake of “vigilantism” where it’s to get rid of crime, i don’t really see him being motivated to kill people. He seems to have a heroic morality to him where it’s more about helping people as much as possible rather than just stopping crime, which is why in the previous example of not being able to help someone i think he would be much more devastated than i’d he just killed someone for say in the moment self defence for either him or others.

good heart + morals + clashing with his post apocalyptic apathy: i understand i would LOVE to see that !! it can lead to incredibly interesting situations. i do think though that this can come around in other ways that we might not traditionally think of/expect. like i mentioned, i do see him as someone with an inherent heroic morality of helping people to him, and i don’t think that’s something that would ever come into any significant question for him (because of the blue beetle example). But that doesn’t mean i don’t think of him as without moral ambiguity/greyness, which i think he has plenty of in terms of his worldview and how he is as a person. I think a decent example is the fact that he literally hung out with his grandfathers murderer who helped him with his biggest and arguably most important mission ever. Whether bart agreed to his company out of it just happening or no other choice is something else, but he clearly had no problem being with the guy and even making snide remarks calling him “neutron” which nathaniel is probably traumatised by 😂 Growing up in his post apocalyptic world bart clearly has no qualms about stealing things, like at all. I think moral ambiguity would manifest in just how he is as a person, which can be (mis)interpreted as someone just being from a different time rather than having different moral principles. I think the fact that he’s seemingly addicted (this is more of a HC ig but based on my interpretation of him from the show 😭) to just always being there to help people out, he had no problem literally just abandoning everyone he knows to join the Legion with their mission (which is insane to me lmfao) and maybe, he can be a bit cold like that. In that one scene where the Outsiders lose track of where Vic went, and Jaime was almost killed by the X-pit and as bart said “Gar got his butt kicked” he seemed pretty upset at the notion of “losing” on a mission, like it’s something he doesn’t even want to consider. I think he takes personal failures quite seriously (Mt Justice, Wally), not to the extent that it’s debilitating, but it definitely plays on his mind to a point that I can see him get pissed at himself if anything.

Basically, i see his moral greyness and apathy manifesting in a type of aloof coldness of things socially, where he can seem maybe a bit inconvenienced by morals that are standard of the people around him, and in terms of a very drastic desensitisation of things like death and killing, and in terms of overall morality like theft/doing things for the sake of survival/the mission, but not without having to abandon his core moral of just helping people out. I HC that maybe he might struggle a little with some notions of empathy that he probably had to work towards by just being in the present, and that his sense of morality is maybe almost always mission based where he just wants to get things done, rather than out of a more humanitarian POV.

hope my essay can get some of my points across to answer ur ask 😅 and thank u again for such an incredibly interesting question !!

#yj asks #bart allen #young justice #impulse #kid flash #yj #young justice phantoms #dc

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tiredstressedemotionalmess · 7 months

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sometimes i think about party poison + sleep

(don't know why but i'm watching saw and considering things)

OHHHHH ME WHEN MARTYRDOM AND CONFRONTING DEATH. VERSE ONE IS ABOUT THEM AND THE CITY AND BC VENOM SIBLINGS BRAIN ITS THE WAY THEY FOUGHT TO PROTECT KOBRA WHILE THEY WERE STILL IN THERE "THERE AINT NO WAY THAT IM SORRY FOR WHAT I DID" = THEIR REFUSAL TO ADMIT THAT THEIR EFFORTS TO PROTECT KOBRA ALSO ENDED UP HURTING HIM IN THE LONG RUN. and the "undeserving of your sympathies" is soooo party poison bc they think they are a Horrible Fucking Person and they refused to be pities for the shit theyve been through bc they failed at protecting kobra and they failed at saving him and they know deep down they dont deserve to be the hero which is why they try so hard to be exactly that

AND THEN THE CHORUS IS JUST LIKE. LIKE IM IMAGING THEIR FINAL THOUGHTS WHILE SAVING THE GIRL AND MAYBE THEY CAN SEE KOBRA PANICKING TRYING TO GET TO THEM OR THEY JUST KNOW IF THE OTHERS SURVIVE THEYLL ALL BE DEVASTATED AND THEY JUST WANNA SCREAM "NO!!! DONT MOURN ME DONT CRY FOR ME DONT GIVE YOURSELVES UP TO TRY AND SAVE ME IM DYING FOR YOU. I FAILED TO KEEP YOU SAFE SO THE LEAST I CAN DO IS DIE, YES TO GIVE YOU MORE TIME BUT MORE THAN THAT BECAUSE I FUCKING DESERVE IT"

and then ohhhhhhh it works so well with one of my favorite interpretations of partys death where they just. give up. theyre exhausted and they know they have to die a hero because its their destiny its their purpose theyre supposed to protect their family to the end and if it doesnt end here then whats the fucking point? its like they view themself as a character in a way and they need their story to end like this because they cant make sense of a world where they aren't giving up their everything to save the ones they love. and maybe if they fought harder theyd be able to overpower korse and get away or stall until kobra comes to save them but they dont. they need their story to end here so they just shut their eyes and they kiss the world goodbye and chose to sleep. and they tell themself they arent being selfish because theyre dying for their family, but deep down they know that this isnt doing anything to distract the other crows or but anyone any more time. deep down they know theyre just tired and they want to fucking sleep.

and idk i just love thinking about a world where they spend their whole life certain that theyll sacrifice their life for someone else, only to die in the most selflessly selfish way possible. they couldnt even end their own story right

#asks #party poison

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kaiserkisser · 7 months

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ok well naturally i have been thinking (and crying) about the jjk ch 236 spoilers, but the first thing my mind went to was this

Firstly, isn't Mahoraga supposed to be gone because of purple?? And say mahoraga managed to release an attack before purple, i didn't really see anything like that in ch 235 that indicated that. and seeing that gojo had practically destroyed the surroundings with purple, how would mahoraga manage to stay hidden, especially from gojo's six eyes? And yet somehow mahoraga not only came back, but unleashed such a devastating attack. And although its completely possible that sukuna summoned him again, for some reason I just doubt that. i mean, sukuna looked kinda beat up imo , taking into consideration that like gojo, he repeatedly used his domain expansion

so literally my first question is where tf did mahoraga come from again??

Next, ive been thinking about what sukuna's trump card could have been. could it have been this attack of mahoraga's? or is there something even worse lying in wait? and is there a chance that sukuna will use this against kashimo? i doubt it. i think that perhaps sukuna expected everyonw else to run up and fight. Also during all of this, where are kenjaku and uraume?

And lastly, i really want to feed my delusions by accepting the theory that gojo is practically a demon and can only die by having his head chopped off. But when going through the toji scene again, i saw that he had added this:

i feel like the second pic may contradict this theory (i hope it doesnt) (translations might be different) because he specifically says cursed tool, which means cursed energy. so im sure mahoraga's attack would have had plenty of cursed energy, right? But for my and gojo's sake, lets pray that the theory is actually right and it isnt gojover yet (feed my delusions please)

and lastly, about when gojo says goodbye to geto and everyone else. that doesnt make sense. so what if its like the meeting between harry and dumbledore in HP7- harry, who isnt dead but thinks he is, meets dumbledore, who is dead. what if its like that here too, and gojo saying goodbye is because he is returning back to the living world. I mean it kinda feels like that to me...

ps- this is all only my theorising because i want to believe that my satoru is still alive so pls dont take this too seriously :)

#✾rambles•#jjk spoilers #jjk manga #jjk 236 #jjk chapter 236 #gojo satoru #sukuna

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hurrakka · 9 months

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oh man. theoretically in a l4d au luis would've helped develop the green flu yeah? sure it's a naturally occurring virus in l4d canon (maybe. we're not really sure where it comes from cus ceda doesnt say shit but ellis mentions the government using bio-bombs in one of his keith stories so it could be a bioweapon?) but this is an au we can do what we want.

anygays im just imagining leon getting infected. we know better-safe-than-sorry-guy (i call him scout cus his va is the same as scout from tf2) is human when we first find him but experiencing extreme paranoia and some compulsions then a few minutes later he fully turns, going from able to speak and function to choking and growling and fully mutated (either into a hunter, boomer, or smoker) so there's always the possibility of a rapid transformation too. im thinking leon falling behind a bit while theyre walking because he's coughing and chokin and shit n he falls to his knees and luis is all like "bro whats wrong!!" and he gets to watch as leon Turns Before His Eyes. even better if he turns into a hunter cus if you look closely at their models they don't have eyes. we can't be exactly sure what Happens to their eyes when they turn but the two most popular headcanons are both equally brutal-- either Luis has to watch Leon's eyes quite literally melt out of his skull or he gets to watch him claw his own eyes out. Fun!

BUT there's graffiti in one of the safe rooms arguing over how long it actually takes to turn-- whether it's 20 minutes, 2 hours, overnight, or some other wacky chunk of time. so there's also the thought of Leon turning slowly. progressively becoming irritable and irrational and confused and him slipping in and out of conciousness for days until Luis goes to check his temp one day and he fucking Lunges.

and if leon turns and luis makes it out alive imagine the Guilt. he feels awful enough in re4 canon when there's a cure,,, but the green flu mutates too often to develop a proper cure for it. if leon gets infected and he isnt immune then he's just. done. theres nothing that can help him at that point. and luis already feels so goddamn guilty about the millions of people he's killed and now leon's gone too and he cant help but visualize every single person who had somebody ripped from them by his hands.

oh man and if luis has to put leon down? its joever. that man would Never recover. i dont even know if he'd keep trying to survive at that point. maybe just for that shred of hope of developing a cure (even though he knows it'd be damn-near impossible but it's the only thing hes got, dammit) and stopping this whole disaster.

coughs. sorry for the rambling i simply have been obsessed with l4d for going on 12 years now so <3

I had to lay down for a moment bc of the feels and potential outcomes in the event luis lives on while leon well...yeah (thinkin abt how buddy from re damnation would jus turn as well since leon is no longer there and that made me big sad dgkrnekhbfgnjklh) Since the re verse has like morbillion viruses, the green flu existing would be plausible so its just another stonks moment for umbrella lol. But yeah luis would absolutely be devastated. He probably doesnt have the guts to pull the trigger, least he can do is to restrain leon for a while and tries to find whatever humanity he has left in his nonexistent eyes. Tho in my witch!leon hc I think luis may have a chance to keep leon around??? Since witches seem to have the most humanity among the infected (and thats not saying much) he could probs observe him a lil bit without getting eaten right away. It would just be a warm bodies scenario ngl (i just watched that movie recently so this is huge copium dksfghbshgndfh) Honestly Im glad l4d fandom still alive after all these years. That game will always be goated and it was one of my high-school obsessions. I used to do crossover stuff back then and Im back to doing it now. Time rly do be a flat circle

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multiplicity-positivity · 1 year

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ive been doing research on pluralpedia to no avail, so i figured i would come here and ask this question. today we had a new guy show up and i was wondering if there is a term for an alter or headmate just Showing Up or a type of splitting that doesnt happen from a overtly negative experience? like for example with the new guy we got today, he showed up while we were chilling outside & sitting in the sunshine. this isnt the first time this has happened either, we've had a few moments where we are just existing and our brain goes "oh im so and so" and then that alter exists. if this info helps, we do have bpd and experience the fluctuating sense of identity that comes with it, so that could possibly be a factor. please let us know what you think and thanks for taking the time to read 💛

Hello, we also have BPD and our system has experienced something like this. However, for us, these alters were not actually new; they had split a long time ago and resurfaced because the system was in a safer place.

If you have a dissociative disorder, splits happen from stress or trauma. Splitting is a coping mechanism used by the brain in times of difficulty. So you may have split in the past and just didn’t meet this headmate until recently, or they may have existed as a fragment and suddenly popped up due to the system feeling safe, or resolving some identity issues.

These alters may have come out of a dormancy, or were just recently willing to introduce themselves after hiding for a long time (the latter happens in our system fairly regularly). It may seem like they split off during a peaceful time, but it’s much more likely that they’ve been in your system for longer.

You mentioned “overtly negative” experiences, and I’d like to add that covert negative experiences can sometimes be just as harmful as overt ones. Something that may not seem painful or difficult to one headmate may be devastating to another. Something that at the time did not seem like trauma could very well be having subconscious or hard to notice effects on your system. Things like sickness, loneliness, BPD splitting (which is different from splitting in dissociative disorders!), rejection, cold remarks/unkind words, or misunderstandings can all be considered covertly negative experiences. And if your system has split in the past in order to cope, it may be all too ready to split again even if the situation doesn’t necessarily call for it.

You can learn more about splitting in dissociative disorders here, and splitting in BPD here.

Of course, if your system is spiritual, endogenic, or otherwise not trauma-formed, these headmates may not have formed in the past. They might be walk-ins or just characters come to life (I think imagien is the term? Or willomate?). We will say that if you have a complex dissociative disorder, the chances that this headmate is not traumagenic in some way are slim.

🖋 Cecil and 🐢 Kip

#splitting #traumagenic #bpd #trauma #dormancy

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mifs · 8 months

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cws for terminal illness and death

NOT ABOUT ME IM FINE. physically dont worry. this is a my life and family update for those who care

mentally though holy shit

this post is to announce very late that on september 1st 2023 my mom passed away from complications of lung cancer that moved to her liver.

never posted about this shit publicly before because this was always a funny humorous blog and talking about real feelings is scary. but this post is mainly for the people im not really in contact with anymore so they know this happened

this whole process of grief in my brain has led to some really weird shit, i think i might have hallucinated voices whispering in running water (this wasnt that bad) and had a few different moments where actual word salad came out of my mouth and i couldnt put words together that made any sense. (this was fucking terrifying)

at the end i really wasnt close with her because our relationship had been strained for a very long time. many dead archived server vent channels can back this up. but im still extremely grieving because thats my fucking mom you know. im just glad she isnt in pain anymore

we lost my oma back in december so its like fate is trying to cram as much possible Devastating Shit in one year yknow? Sucks! sucks major league

its been a long time coming but it still hurts a lot, family's been coming to see us and things. i got to drive a boat because my rich ass aunt came to town

but yeah this post has been long overdue. i figured you guys should know and we're planning a memorial for her next april.

thanks for reading and taking the time

#talkin

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anon-e-miss · 1 year

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I was thinking about what a *bad* pregnancy would look like for Prowl, and I had this idea that, like… He’s having a horribly rough carry (morning sickness, aching joints, exhaustion, etc), so he doesn’t do any field work, but nothing and nobody can stop him from tactics back at the base.

Except… the constructicons (who are obsessed with Prowl) notice his absence and strike a deal with Rumble and Frenzy to sparknap Prowl while Devastator keeps Jazz busy. Jazz is good, but… well, they’re a gestalt. And he and Prowl don’t yet have a bond, so he doesn’t realize anything is amiss until it’s too late. He might even get badly damaged because they’re actively targeting him.

So now the Constructicons have a heavily gravid Prowl. If he fights them, Hook threatens to induce premature labor, since he has medic protocols. He runs the odds and his only option is cooperation. Which obviously he hates!

The Constructicons strike a deal with Tarantulas to work together and build a convincing fake Prowl. Their plan is to say Prowl died in childbirth before hostage negotiations could be completed (due to stress), and ‘return’ his frame plus the bitlets they don’t want for a fee/in exchange for con hostages while actually keeping Prowl as a plaything. (Hidden from everyone but Tarantulas)

Imagine Jazz coming out of a coma to find out Prowl is ‘dead’. But at least they recovered his bitties. What would he do? If he goes to look for Prowl despite the extremely accurate corpse he already received, he might orphan the bitlets. (I’m picturing the Twins + Strongarm + Chase—maybe others, too) He has to take care of the kids he has, not go off chasing ghosts.

Does he even know this ISNT Prowl’s frame? Hook is a perfectionist, and Tarantulas is somehow even more the gestalt, so I think it’s accurate down to the tiniest scar. And his array. Which they might’ve used while waiting for their turn on the real deal, and they explain any transfluid as ‘he asked for donations because he could tell things were going south. He was willing.’ Along with a video of Prowl agreeing that he needs contributions to get through this. (Possibly edited by Soundwave, who knows)

How would Prowl get out of a mess like that?

Not something I would write. I find the Constructicons tedious mostly and especially centring around Prowl. So I write them at most a few lines and then… bye bye. Not shitting on anyone liking the dynamic, I just don’t.

My answer to this plot would be mostly, Prowl isn’t pathetic. He fights. Guns don’t care if you’re disabled, they equalize a lot of things. There’s no point where he wouldn’t fight. And I don’t see him agreeing to be raped for transfluids.

Let’s look at my history with Prowl suffering. And boy do I make him suffer. The times when he can’t actively fight, are engineered more than just capture holding him back and even then, he still puts up fights. At no point is he broken to nothing. And no point is he not planning or fighting.

Even in Ecdysis where he’s about as broken as I’ve made him, he’s still fighting.

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mooifyourecows · 2 years

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moo i’m so devastated with what america is going to turn into. it already was a shit show but now not only am i losing my right to bodily autonomy and i’m probably going to lose a lot more sooner than later. not only as a woman but also as a lesbian. i’ve seen things about how the supreme court might reverse same-sex marriage protection and i’m honestly prepared for the worst at this point. america is going to turn into hell for everyone in it and likely everyone around it.

I know it's all pretty bleak, but don't lose your hope. If one good thing will come from this nightmare, it's that the moderates and liberals who weren't radicalized before are going to be now. Voting isn't enough, but if we all work together to get leftist politicians into office and get rid of do nothing democrats like Nancy Pelosi, change IS possible

We just need to stay informed, stay mad, and stay hopeful that things can get better. Understand what things you CAN do and don't kill yourself over the things you can't. We flipped states in 2020 and we can flip even more now. Just support the people who lean the utmost to the left. The type of people that all your conservative relatives would call antifa extremists. That's who we need to replace the useless democrats stinking up congress and the senate

If we can get rid of the filibuster and electoral college, expand the court, and codify everything that should have been codified years ago (thanks Obama you useless liar)(biden still has a chance but its looking not good so we will also go ahead and file him under useless too), then we have a chance to make this country about half as good as they tried so hard to brainwash us it was

The younger generations are wising up. They've been radicalized earlier and in larger quantities than the ones who came before them. Every year a new wave of gen Z voters join the fight and you'll see that every year the old conservative incumbents will be replaced with younger, better people who actually give a shit.

I know it's not good enough. I HATE when useless democrats say "vote 😋" as a solution to our problems, especially in a country where the popular vote means nothing and the supreme court isnt elected by regular people. I know its fucking infuriating and ive been overwhelmed by all my rage and sadness the past few days. I want to riot and burn things down, drag our oppressors into the street and publicly execute them so that the change we deserve can happen TODAY. But we live in a horrifically militarized state and even peaceful protesting results in the brutality and death of innocent lives. so our dreams of justified bloodshed can't be so easily carried out

Stay mad though. Educate everyone around you. Help where you can. Remember that there are states where its still legal to get abortion access and there are resources to help people in need. Just stay safe and limit the amount of data they can steal from you in any way possible. Delete the apps that need to be deleted. Install Mozilla Firefox or other browser that ensures privacy. Get a VPN. Don't sign paperwork. Don't talk to the cops. Spread useful information to all your friends and neighbors and classmates and beyond.

Everything fucking sucks but things can always change

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dyketubbo · 1 year

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Egg Tubbo you say?

egg tubbo i do say. because for some reason i really like torturing this lil guy. i went on a ramble about it in another server so ill paste that under the cut but basic summary i expand on the egg a bit more to make it have more stakes + be more horrifying. in this case, the egg helps fulfill your deep desires, but in a monkey paws way where it does it in the worst way possible. simpler desires get fulfilled quicker, complex ones are promised over time. ponk wants an arm, she gets an arm, but being so directly connected to the egg keeps her under control for longer. ant wants velvet back, well.. sacrifice enough people and the egg could do whatever it wished (but velvet probably would be brought back as a server or vessel for the egg)

and well.. tubbo wants a community. a purpose. to know what the fuck he should be doing with his life. he needs to have something to dedicate himself to, that wont leave or be destroyed. and, deep deep down, its not necessarily a desire, but. he feels hes living on a scam, so to speak. like back when they were getting the discs back one more time, or maybe in the wreckage of his country, he should have died to give a chance to someone, something else. hes done enough, and yet he so, so desperately needs something else to do. so the egg takes him in, and takes hold of his wishes.

tubbo doesnt die in the traditional way, but his life does become the eggs, in every way it could. he wanted a community right? to serve and make into a purpose? let the eggpire be his community, let the egg give him a guideline of what to do next with his life, let furthering the eggs reach be his purpose. tubbos body is taken over, his conscious even moreso, but he knows exactly who hes getting next. ramble about the actual story under the cut rather than just the premise

the basic gist is like. i want to make the egg be something a bit more Physical since in my own head i can go outside of what minecraft allows for etc etc. also bc i like fucked up horror scenarios. here, the egg is supposed to give you what you want, but its often a like.. monkeys paw situation, and if you do get what you want its often not in the Way you wanted it.

more direct desires get filled quicker, i.e. ponks arm. and, in this case, tubbos desire for a community. one that respects him, listens to him. one thats like a family, and wont ever leave. but deeper than that, hes very, very tired of everything. he wants a purpose to keep going, but as it is.. he doesnt have one. he cant really make being a husband or father into a Purpose, not the way lmanburg was one. he wants to provide, but in a way that helps a bigger community, one that will fight like lmanburg did against all odds.

and so, the finger curls, and the egg gives tubbo a purpose. to serve the eggpire, and specifically the egg itself. it wraps vines around him, sprouting flowers here and there, and during the process.. he loses his last life, but ends up staying in a weird, half dead state where the egg is not only taking over his body, but still possessing his conscious, and since it needs a conscious to possess in the first place, hes still tied to his own body, not being able to leave for limbo. however, with the altered state, its hard for him to really be aware of much if the egg doesnt care

tubbos actual loved ones are. of course. Devastated. bc what the Fuck tubbo. but all they really know is that he joined the eggpire, not the extent of the control the egg has over him. ranboo ends up panicking abt having to make sure michael isnt affected while also still not alerting techno, so he stays with tommy for a while and has either eret or fundy watch over as him and tommy go out every now and again to try and get tubbo back.

neither of them really succeed, and end up admitting that they need a lot more help. they get tied in more firmly with the egg plot as a result, and join the omelette resistance etc etc. some things stay the same, others change, ranboo gets very close to being possessed but escapes last minute. lots of tension ends up resulting between benchtrio

blah blah skip forward its red banquet time. similar stuff happens, but this time with the addition of tubbo, who is. yknow. somewhat experienced in war strategy, some things get circumvented.

yknow how tubbo has the secret passage by the egg. and also a fucking shitton of dogs left over from nlm. basically he ends up being able to counter technos dog army and is also able to communicate enough that *puffy* loses a life rather than ant, as hannah intercepts in time. tubbo is a lot closer w the other eggpire members here btw but he esp ends up bonding with hannah (bc flowers) and ant (bc gay lovers both of these are simplifications but basically theyre friends). hes also a little closer to ponk (bc they know each other already)

either way, the eggpire still has to flee, but they do suffer less losses here and with tubbos tunnels (which would be more expanded to be a Tubbo Thing that he does during war in general) they end up having some well. technically lower ground but metaphorically higher ground in the situation

eventually, ranboo decides to make a risky decision. he gets some help to try and track some of tubbos tunnels and, one day, waits by one with michael

tubbo comes up eventually and, well. its his son. hes near immediately pacified, not being able to bring himself to hurt michael. ranboo is relieved, but.. tubbo reaches down, kneeling to hug michael.

and then his body slumps.

panicked, ranboo grabs michael and runs off, planning to come back later, but when he does, tubbos body is gone, with only flowers and vines where he last was.

the next time they meet, tubbo looks even more covered in vines and flowers, and this time, when he beckons ranboo to follow, ranboo doesnt hesitate.

ranboo follows tubbo to the egg, and asks why tubbo left, wasnt he happy? tubbo tells him he'll be a lot happier if ranboo joined him. that in the end, this really was the way to bring the family together. if ranboo just gave up now, they could live in peace with michael, and once all the others gave up too, there would be nothing to fight. dream was in prison, schlatt long dead, wilbur nothing but a forgetful ghost. even techno and phil turned out to be fallible. what was there to be afraid of anymore?

tubbo had a purpose now. a community to fight for. a family to care for. isnt that what ranboos always wanted? to fight for people? people over sides, isnt that right? tubbo finally understood now. all it would take is one night, and they could be a happy family forever. just like they wanted.

..what else is there to do? ranboo accepts, and lets himself be walled in next to the egg with tubbo. he rests his head on tubbos chest, calmed by the throbbing heartbeat, and rests.

the egg speaks to him. about all the secrets ranboo has tried to hide, about how it would be so much easier to have a sense of self if he let the egg give him someone to be. he just wants to be there for his family, doesnt he? why keep secrets from tubbo, why keep hurting him by never pressing, always letting him stay complacent? but with the egg, they could understand each other, fight for each other, have no secrets left untold. and nothing but acceptance. doesnt that sound nice?

with very little digging, it drags up a nagging little thought. ranboo would do anything for their family, right? even sacrifice themselves?

the egg whispers that happy families dont keep secrets. if ranboo gave themself up now, there would be none to keep. just them and tubbo, in holy matrimony, where not even death could do them part. the egg knows every little thought, and with a harsh edge, it tells them that *it* knows how to get ranboo their happy family, not dream. cut out the middleman, and get what you want with very little cost.

knowing who he is, wanting to protect his family. very simple desires, really. the egg could tell him everything, all he has to do is let go.

so he does. ranboo lets go, and with the last few blinks of consciousness, they realize they arent hearing tubbos heartbeat. its the egg's.

the _beloveds end up being hard to win back over. its them and michael, til the end. tommy ends up being one of the only ones still fighting for them, rather than against. but with how much the egg is able to take over tubbo and ranboo bc of that whole deal, its even harder for them to break out, especially since, well, michael doesnt realize anythings wrong, so hes still happy and safe and theres nothing that really shocks them out about that.

how things get solved is a bit fuzzier in my mind but i imagine it is tommy who breaks through to tubbo somehow. ithink in this case tubbo has a deal with the other members that they cant hurt tommy or ranboo. maybe one of the members tries to hurt tommy, and it makes him snap out a little, just enough to jog ranboo out a bit too.

thankfully ranboo still has his totem hoarding thing and i think by the end of their deal with the egg both are able to live on the life their totems give them once the egg lets go of control etc etc

#angel answers #egg tubbo au #dsmp #dsmp au #tubbo #possession tw #also tws for implied suicidal ideation/sacrificial tendencies and for manipulation and death + mild body horror #feel free to ask any other questions . bc for some reason this au is really prone to randomly giving me vivid daydreams every now and then

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miriamundertale · 20 days

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da miriam writing masterpost

so im porting my writing/review stuff over from wordpress to here. both are gonna be getting updated ideally so if u hate wordpress here is good and if u hate tumblr yet are on here to see this the wordpress isnt going away

to answer the "why is this around" question. i work nights at a hotel, and its very uhhh, full of free time. so ive wound up having most of the night to either watch stuff or read manga, and its gotten to the point where i think i should probably keep track of my opinions of them more in depth -- this felt like the smartest way to do so.

The core point of this post is gonna be to track stuff i want to write about and be a pretty ok navigation point for people. lets break whats coming down:

Yoshiru Konogi, the Hornybait writer who Fucking Gets it

if youve seen me tweeting ever henjou has almost definitely shown up. henjou is hornybait and largely just a sex comedy much like everything Konogi writes, but i think the standout about her writing in the genre and henjou and its spinoff in particular (Eroko-San on the attack) is that while theres an obviously set audience for the horny teenage boy in both, the target feels less to be them and more to be women, either the weirdo girl whos willing to be openly horny or the failwoman neet whos terminally fucking posting about being horny online. its very different in feel to a lot of its genre and i think deserves some more analysis. done! Konogi is a weirdly fascinating mangaka and at least worth peeking through like this. i also go into her crypto stuff for some reason

The Game Parodying a Genre You Didn't Know Existed

if i wind up making a video out of any of these, itl be this one. this is about a specific game in my horrible side hobby of playing terrible western eroge, specifically those using koikatsu party as their source of visuals. my biggest fear is how intentional the parody itself is, as unlike Yoshiru Konogi's work i dont have an accessible back catalog of works to go through. if i wind up having the creator see and and get some sort of weird backlash to my reading im going to be so fucking devastated. they're very much a weirdo(positive) so i dont imagine anything like that but the fear is there.

Homestuck

Yeah i fucking know trashing homestuck is very easy considering the state of a lot of homestuck fans and the way people were with it, especially since it was for a lot of people a first for fandom (and realistically was probably the worst possible entry into fandom one could get,) but homestuck really has a lot of interest going on in its meta layers and how it is intrinsically tied to the era it was written in. Homestuck and its successors (the epilogues and hs2, maybe ill read some of the bigger FA's once i get to this) have a lot of depth that i feel gets terminally ignored or just passed by from basically everyone who has had some sort of interaction with it, be they fans or Normal People

Star wars - God i fucking hate episode 9

Thats right two red flag series in a row babey. we got some TERRIBLE posting Writing POASTING about to happen Star wars realistically is a good series cursed with one of the worst fanbases imaginable, and i want to examine the overarching themes it has about fascism in detail, but here's the basic outline: the original trilogy is about the defeat of fascism and taking only the best from the past, the prequel trilogy is about the rise of fascism and how it corrupts democracy from within, and the sequel trilogy SHOULD have been continuing on the themes of the original and how fascism corrupts and utilizes the past as a tool to grow its own power (but instead we get the most fucking pandery fucking movie targeted at the worst of the fandom)

The one good gacha is fucking dead

Listen i just really wanna talk about dragalia. maybe it was laser targeted at me with its obvious mmo influences but dragalia was MADE for the platform it is on instead of being extant on that platform. dragalia wasnt by any means the best game ever made but it was easily the best gacha ever made. the loss of dragalia is a fucking crime that needs to be talked about more.

Can we please do a good live action comic book movie again at least spiderman like cmon

pretty please i wont complain about the actor spiderman is my favorite superhero of all time and the last two good live action spiderman movies were the first two raimi movies. i think they realised that with no way home and thought by bringing back dafoe and molina they had nailed that when really it was raimis commitment to understanding the fucking medium hes adapting that made those two hit so well and is part of why im so conflicted on multiverse of madness which i also wanna talk about

One Punch Man

See this is coming at some point i have a lot to say about OPM and specifically comparing it to the original webcomic but for now i will leave it at you should read the webcomic its good

Kyoukai No Kanata the best anime of all time

Kyoukai no kanata is the best anime of all time and im not taking questions

#miri writing #big post

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