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#weird complaint
cursedcommutethoughts · 3 months
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It deeply bothers me there are no fics in Cherry Magic with corporate espionage as a subplot. Or a main plot. Like, I get it, that's not the genre... But there's so much that can be done with a character who can read minds. Just think about it. Reading minds to get inside scoops on deals. So far that's happened once in the anime, and I need it to happen more. I need the thrills and the angst and the laughs because Adashi would make the worst corporate spy.
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aledethanlast · 7 months
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For the last time Neil is not oblivious he's just so busy playing 5d chess with everyone he meets that the concept of regular chess baffles and bores him. Matt what do you mean I should hook up with a cheerleader can't you see I'm busy waging psychological warfare on a Frenchman.
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anglingforlevels · 7 months
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Open House (Yandere House x Reader)
When people say the housing market is a nightmare, is this what they had in mind? (The story goes out to me because I’m trying to get an apartment and it is Suffering. Please pretend this count as yandere.)
CW: not proofread, unconventional captivity, swearing, I accidentally had too much fun writing Abby and forgot the point of the story-
Minors DNI
When you proudly had reached the saving milestone to buy a small house in the countryside, you had opted to spend some of that money on a real estate agent, figuring it was a good investment, hiring a Ms. Abby Bardot – who, over the phone, had insisted heavily on being called Abby rather than Ms. Bardot – who had twenty years of experience in the field.
Quite quickly, you realized that perhaps she wasn’t the most conventional real estate agent.
Ms. Abby, you quickly noticed at your first meeting, was all hand-wringing and nervous sweating, though she seemed sweet enough, having clutched a tin of home-cooked cookies in all shades of black and almost-not-black, and had heartily insisted you’d take as many as you’d like (which was zero).
She had insisted on bringing you to an open house for what she had called a hidden gem of a house, that it would be a private tour. To you, once she mentioned it would be at 1 p.m., it was quite obvious that “private tour” meant, “no one else has or will be showing up”.
Ms. Abby had also enthusiastically shown pictures of the place, pictures she had ready-at-the-go on her phone, presumably she really needed a buyer for the house.
“Ms. Abby.” You had said, interrupted with a small interjection of, Oh please, just Abby. “Ms. Abby, that’s not quite a house and more so a small manor. I went over my budget with you when I hired you.” Ms. Abby had quickly recovered from the rejection and puffed out her chest proudly.
“Why that’s the best part, this is within your budget!”
You had sent her a dubious look at this. “Are the pictures… How do I put this delicately? Are the pictures recent and unedited?”
Ms. Abby deflated so quickly that it almost felt impressive, almost urging you to clap as if it was a circus performance. Of course, it felt mean had you clapped at her dejected look.
“It’s well-kept, I assure you. These pictures are all recent, I’ve updated them every year for almost my entire career!” She said proudly, and you almost felt pity at the fact she didn’t seem to realize her own slip-up but instead paraded it around like a badge of honor.
Though, all-in-all you were charmed, and somewhat endeared, by the honesty. But not very much by the house at all. “I think I’d like to look at other options, it’s awfully big for just one person.”
“Ah, wait!” Ms. Abby said urgently. “Please, before we continue with other options, let’s first try out the open house this Friday.”
“Is this protocol, Ms. Abby?” Ms. Abby’s lips wobbled at this and… “Are you crying?!”
“No, I’m a professional. Real Estate Agents don’t cry, I’m simply sweating, is all.” Ms. Abby sniffled, dubbing her eyes with a handkerchief, presumably you were meant to believe her eyes were suffering heat stroke on this fine autumn day.
“…Alright, I’ll go to the open house. Just give me the address.” You eventually relented, if only to avoid seeing the pitiful sight of a teary-eyed Ms. Abby.
That’s how you ended up before a grand house out in the middle of nowhere, the closest town was an hour-long drive away. Forest and fields were most of the surroundings, which was why the house was in such stark contrast, standing as a sole presence, the forests and fields shying away to make room for it, leaving a vast vacancy around it, stretching on for at least fifty meters.
It really was a pristine house, when comparing it to the pictures, it seemed to match right down to the placement of every rock and plant in sight. As if someone had consciously placed each leaf and pebble.
The plants and trees of the garden donned vibrant colors despite the season. You wondered how often Ms. Abby came by, or if she had hired a crew for maintenance, as you could not spot even the slightest hint of dirt or spiderwebs.
The only thing that looked aged was, unfortunately, the “For Sale” sign.
It felt a little unnatural, but you chalked it up to currently being a display house, and thus not lived-in either. You took notice of the way the trees beyond the reach of the garden were withered and wrinkled, and the grass yellowy, dry patches, barely hiding the dirt beneath.
“Some more forest could really do this place some good.” You mumbled. You hesitated for reasons you didn’t fully understand before stepping beyond dead plants clinging loosely to your feet and entering the garden.
You felt a prickling sensation behind your eyes the further you traveled, the door felt so far when the weight of something cloyingly attentive seemed to drag you down as if to prevent your advances.
“You’re here!” A delighted Ms. Abby yelled out before the sound of pitter-patter was interrupted by a loud thud against the door that rattled the frame. With her energy dampened, a sheepish Ms. Abby appeared behind the front door, simply saying; “It opens the other way.”
Right, something attentive could only have been the attention of the overzealous Ms. Abby.
“Come in, come in!” She invited, all but pulling you stumbling into a most decadently, lavishly decorated foyer. From distasteful stuffed animal heads to the ruby red furniture and mosaic glass tables, it felt quite uncomfortable, all sharp angles and very little homeliness to it, like an ornate display of wealth rather than a welcome into a household.
“Not very welcoming, huh?” You commented, which Ms. Abby elected not to respond to, though the small “eep” suggested she had heard the negative impression.
Looking the room over it was impossible for your eyes not to rest at the centerpiece of the foyer: A huge painting above the staircase. A solemn-looking guy stared out into the air, curly locks framing his face. Old paintings always looked miserable, yet you couldn’t help but feel there was a glint of genuine misery in his eyes. Noticing your attention had wandered, Ms. Abby followed your eyes.
“Oh, that was an owner of the house who had it commissioned back during the Renaissance, they wanted it right here, in the heart of the house.” She explained though you couldn’t say you agreed to a decadent foyer being the heart of a house, and if it was, that wasn’t boding well for Ms. Abby’s already poor sales chances.
“I’ve never understood why someone would want to pay money to look miserable in a painting, like you’re paying for it, at least make yourself smile or something.” Your jab was met with Ms. Abby’s impressive ability to carry on like you had said nothing negative at all.
“You know, the owner claimed it was a Jan van Eyck-original too.” Ms. Abby said as if letting you in on a secret, or town gossip. “Really, we’ve had it appraised.”
“And the appraiser confirmed it was a Jan van-whatever original?”
“…The owner really loved art; you’ll see plenty of paintings throughout the place.”
So that was a no. And speaking of no’s:
“Listen, Ms. Abby, I don’t exactly have the budget for a big house, as I already said. I especially don’t have the kind of budget that the kind of person who’d commission an artist to paint them for their foyer would have.”
Abby laughed nervously. “Well, you see, the value’s dropped as I mentioned. We haven’t been able to sell it for a long time, so the price just kept falling.”
“Right. But even so, it can’t have fallen that much.”
At this, Abby avoided eye contact, wringing her hands before, after a big breath, blurting it out. “The person in the painting was the last person to own the house.”
“Is this place built on top of an oilfield or something?”
Ms. Abby laughed a hearty if a bit shrill, laughter, before sighing and mumbling. “If only.” She clapped. “But! This is a charming house, why, let me show you the many rooms!”
“Ms. Abby, have you ever considered a field outside of sale?” You asked dryly but nonetheless followed along, eager to leave behind the painting, as you felt watched. The house consisted of many sprawling hallways, enough to almost make one dizzy, and you struggled to remember where everything was.
The house had many rooms, none of them particularly inviting, reading more like a historical display room lacking any warmth or heart (and perhaps even worse, any semblance of renovation despite old age), and all absolutely clustered with trinkets, knickknacks, and in the case of the walls, paintings – leaving very little free space.
It really did read like a historical display, as some rooms seemed older than others, suggesting partial renovation must have been done on some of the rooms. You’d like a word with whoever had been in charge of that lackluster, nonsensical effort.
Perhaps the lack of replaced furniture or renovation was why the house periodically seemed to creak and moan in odd ways, at times you almost confused it as Ms. Abby groaning or sighing, only to realize it was the sound of the house itself.
As for Ms. Abby, she remained undeterred regardless of how many snide remarks you made, which you had to commend her for, though the charm you initially had felt from it was quickly wearing off. Ms. Abby actually seemed increasingly happy, humming to herself. She didn’t think the sale was going well, did she?
“How much of the house is there left to see, Ms. Abby?” You asked, increasingly impatient and tired, having been dragged through an unreasonable number of rooms, which inexplicably, almost all were bedrooms (and yet, you had yet to see more than a single bathroom).
“Well, we’re still missing a couple rooms like the kitchen, oh! I know, how about the master bedroom since you’ll be spending every night there.” She said with a beaming smile.
“That’s awfully optimistic, Ms. Abby.” You noted, at this you received a good-hearted chuckle.
“Oh, this place is too lovely to pass up on, I think it likes you – it’s a match made in heaven. If you don’t like some of the features or decorations, it’s easy to change those, so it would be a waste not to live here.”
“I can’t imagine a house as empty as this holding much affection, and I’m not up for a big project.” All you wanted was a small but cozy house, a simple place. You felt exhausted just thinking about the amount of work you’d need to pour into a house like this to make it feel like home.
“Well, it’s perhaps not an easy house,” Ms. Abby admitted, her cheer at this point an unshakeable force, as a sense of confidence seemed to have sprouted in her. “But that’s why when that rare fit comes by one must take the leap and hold onto it.”
You’d feel insulted by the suggestion you were a good fit for this distasteful and unpleasant house, had Ms. Abby not already shown herself as incompetent but well-meaning. You simply sighed, giving up the conversation, figuring you’d find another real estate agent when you came home.
“Well, take me to the master bedroom then.”
Ms. Abby led you through the foyer again, the bedroom apparently at the other end of the house. Your eyes were drawn to the painting once more, its eyes felt more sunken in than before, shadows forming beneath, to which you tiredly sighed. “Me too, buddy. Me too.”
The master bedroom seemed to be at the stopping point to the sprawling hallways on the right. You were just aghast at the fact you had gone through another set of sprawling hallways, you wondered who had come up with the confusing layout of the place.
Ms. Abby tried to imitate a trumpet to build up suspense but trailed off after you shot her an impatient look. After a weak cough, she simply said “Tadaah” and opened the door.
You stopped up, your right foot hanging in the air, about to cross into the room. A sense of foreboding filled you; it was a bit different from the first time, however. The prickling sensation you felt and the cloying attention, it felt smothering, less like a shove away and more like… Being held in place.
Ms. Abby waited patiently inside the room, not commenting on your hesitation, though you had been snarky and displeased the entire tour, so perhaps this just seemed like more of that. You swallowed and ignored the pressure as you put your foot down and entered the room.
The air felt different here. You had hoped the odd sensation would disappear if you just carried on, like when you entered the house, to begin with, instead, it worsened. The air clung to you, terribly heavy and sticky. It took you a moment to actually focus enough to realize Ms. Abby had spoken, so when you finally snapped back to reality, Ms. Abby was standing in the hallway.
“-tively spellbound already. I’ll give you some time to look around and get acquainted together, one-on-one.” And then she closed the door in your face. The room was, oddly empty, compared to every other room. Nothing but a big, red bed, the empty walls that you could’ve sworn were further away when you entered, and that feeling of being watched, lodging into your skin like stitching.
Nothing except an almost empty room that didn’t feel empty enough.
That’s it. Ms. Abby had officially used up all her pity points, you were leaving. You opened the door, a tad more aggressively than what was perhaps called for, but Ms. Abby was nowhere to be seen in the hallway.
For how annoyed you were with her at this point, you found that you missed her company as you walked down the hallway, nothing distracting you from the odd sounds of the house that seemed to have increased. It felt as if the floor beneath your feet moved and rumbled slightly, the velvety carpets uneven and bumpy, as if walking on something breathing, something living.
You wished that Ms. Abby had given you the floor plans, as you struggled to remember how to return to the foyer through the hallways and occasional rooms you had to cross seemed to hold no real rhythm and didn’t feel as if it obeyed any rules about directions.
At one point you could have sworn you turned back, only to be in another room than where you had emerged from originally. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you found the foyer again. Even in your rush to find the door, your eyes were drawn to the painting, though you continued to rush by it. In your haste, it almost looked as if the painting’s colors were smudged.
You attempted to open the door but found it didn’t budge. It was an odd choice to lock the door, but you were certain that was the reason, it had to be. A locked door was no issue from the inside, but even after hearing the click of the lock, the door didn’t budge when you attempted to open it.
You attempted to kick, pry, tear, and even throw your body weight at the door, but with no luck.
Settling in the foyer after your final attempt at prying the front door open, you huffed, out of breath. You laid on the stairs, trying to settle your heart and pulse, when your eyes landed on the painting again.
…You rubbed your eyes and sat up, thinking what you had seen was owed to your tiredness and the upside-down angle, but no. The painting really did look smudged. Like someone had blurred colors and borders together, the hair’s vibrant color having lost its radiance.
And the mouth, it was oddly smudged between the lips, that it almost gave the impression of a mouth being pried open.
No, that was silly, you were being silly. The painting was smudged out, which was already creepy enough on its own, or rather, the house was already creepy enough on its own – your mind was just working overtime and was making up new things to get scared over.
“Well brain, if you like overtime, I guess I’ll have to put you to use and think of an escape. But you don’t have a union, so it’s unpaid hours for you, I’m afraid.”
If the front door was a bust, then you’d find a window. You struggled to recall any windows on the ground floor, but surely there had to be some. Or… That’s right! The kitchen, it had a glass door. You never got around to seeing the kitchen, having mainly been shown the upstairs so far, but you recalled Ms. Abby mentioning it back when she had given her pitch for why you should show up.
You hadn’t been on the left side of the house, at least not on the ground floor, so you figured that was a good direction to begin, in your search for the kitchen. You opened the door, urgency in your steps, only to find you weren’t in an unfamiliar room.
Instead, you were back in the empty master bedroom, which somehow felt much more crammed than any of the other rooms. But… That didn’t make sense. The master bedroom was upstairs, you had fought through a confusing hallway to find the foyer, so this… this didn’t make sense at all.
The air felt oppressive in the room as if your heart would be forced to a halt from the sheer weight of it, like a physical presence. This time you were sure that the walls were closer than they had been before. A bed table had been added next to the bed, and the part of you still delusional enough to hope thought maybe it meant that Ms. Abby was still around. As if this was an elaborate prank.
You tried to swallow despite how dry your mouth felt, your heart hammering painfully against your chest. This was ridiculous. You slammed the door open again, the door shaking on its hinges. Beyond the door, it revealed a hallway, but even if the hallway was confusing, you had been through it twice by now, you could do this, you could find the kitchen or a ground-floor window.
Hurrying along the hallway, it felt as if the floor and walls shifted and moved. Were you dizzy, or was this actually happening? The restrictive air of the master bedroom followed you, as you dragged yourself through.
“Huh?” you furrowed your eyebrows when you opened one of the doors. You were sure this was the one you had gone through before, but the room behind was unfamiliar. Cold dread filled you as a horrible thought crossed your mind.
No, no, no. You ran to the next door but behind it was another unfamiliar room. Were the layout… Changing? Your hand trembled as you tried to open a third door, and you felt like crying when all it revealed was the master bedroom again.
A lamp now stood on top of the bed table. Were new things going to be added each time you returned to the room? You thought back to the cramped bedrooms Ms. Abby had so cheerfully shown off. You weren’t sure what to make of it but felt sick all the same.
“I don’t have time for this.” You had to snap yourself out of it. You could spiral and panic later, but for now, you needed to get out. So, turning on your heel, you returned to the hallway. You’d go through each door that didn’t lead to the master bedroom, hoping to somehow find your way downstairs.
You almost cheered audibly when you finally saw the staircase, rushing to it. Once again, as you passed it, your eyes were drawn to the painting.
The painting no longer looked the same as before, the person it had been long erased by smudged and changing lines. You couldn’t tell what it was changing into but felt your heart race with familiarity all the same.
The mouth was a gaping hole by now, outstretched awkwardly. You thought it might have been a smile, but it looked much more like a pained grimace to you.
You only took this as further encouragement to get out of there.
When you failed to find anything of use, you realized there was one room that you seemed to always find. So, as counterintuitive as it seemed, you walked upstairs again, and as confusing as the changing layout was, it didn’t take you long to find it.
You saw the familiar bed, the bed table, the lamp, and the newly added clock on the wall (which didn’t seem to be working) and closed your eyes for a moment. You took a deep breath. And then you decisively walked in to grab the lamp, shivering a bit as you brushed against a much-too-warm wall.
If you couldn’t find the kitchen or a window on the ground floor, then fuck it, you’d find one up here. Whatever broken bones or bruises you’d get from the fall, you’d accept. Finding a window upstairs proved much more doable, as one would line the walls every now and then.
You threw the lamp against the window and braced yourself for impact.
But nothing happened.
The lamp fell to the floor with a hollow thud. When you opened your eyes, you found not a single scratch on the window. So, you tried again. And again. You tried punching the window, earning nothing but a stinging fist.
Yet you continued. At some point, it became more of a tantrum, an expression of your desperation colored in violence, than an attempt to escape. Hitting the window, kicking the wall. “Why-“ you hated this house. You hated it. Hated, hated, hated it. You just wanted to leave. Your ears rang, whether it was from your headache, or the way the house’s groans and creaks had grown in severity, you didn’t know, didn’t care, couldn’t care.
Already unsteady on your feet, your final kick caused you to lose balance entirely.
Stumbling and falling onto the floor, without realizing it, you found yourself by the stairs, and face to face with the painting. Your blood ran cold as you stared into your own lifeless eyes staring down at you from above.
 
Quiet had fallen over the house like a blanket, only the slow rumble throughout the house bellied any activity. In the heart of the house rested a painting, donning a toothy smile and a certain glint in their eyes.
A satisfied Ms. Abby removed the “For Sale” sign out front and drove away with a hum.
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trillscienceofficer · 30 days
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Star Trek: Voyager Tsunkatse Survival Instinct Human Error
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the-meme-monarch · 1 month
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ut fangames as of late have had a lot of heart to them and they deserve all the praise they get but idk something makes me really defensive when people start saying "it's even Better than the game it's based on" like undertale get behind me
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cheese-rat29 · 3 months
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hannibal is really lucky that he is self-employed in his own private practice because can you IMAGINE if he had an hr department overseeing him?
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snufflescribbles · 1 year
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when you watch promising young woman for the first time and see the ending, and as a woman your BRAIN SCREAMS, 'why do woman have to die to get justice?????'
and then you take deep breaths and realise.... that's the point...that women HAVE to die get justice. they won't believe you until you are fucking dead in a ditch and they have no choice but to believe you.
the ending this cold harsh reminder that oh, you thought this was a feminist revenge fantasy, where everything will work out.
well, here's the cold harsh truth. that the man you might love will be complicit in your worst nightmare. and he will show no remorse unless his career is at stake.
that the men will KILL you and burn your body and enjoy their weddings and escape because they CAN. because the world is built to protect them.
you thought this movie will find escapism here, that oh I Can Win.
well, no. no you can't. they won't let you.
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midnighthybrid1 · 3 months
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So…
Poppy Playtime Chapter 3 Amiright
My first time drawing Catnap, his shapes are so fun to draw maaaaaan-
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qtubbo · 6 months
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Its weird to look at the progression of how people are treating the new parents, because at no point did I ever remember people being so critical before. I assume it’s because people have gotten so used to parents being used to their kids and knowing how to act, and just general attachment to the eggs going up. But the amount of cirticsm ive seen towards bagi, tubbo, niki, and mousy for stuff that other people have done in the past with no complaint is odd. They are new parents and constantly expecting them to be perfect is not it. Bagi’s not going to know how to comfort Em perfectly about Jaiden, Tubbo’s not going to be the perfect communicator, Tina’s not going to fully locked and loaded attentive at the get go. People just seem to constantly forget they are new, they are figuring things out.
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tallgh0st · 5 months
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densitywell · 10 months
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i mean i wouldn't consider disliking imodna and disliking imogen as equivalent of course. and i don't even think it's a thing of people disliking imogen, bc sometimes you express your love for a character by not shutting up about what you think is wrong with them. but like, it tracks that a lot of the people who see imodna as empty and lacking real connection are the same ones who focus near exclusively on the harm (both real and imagined) that imogen causes others, to the point of seeming deeply disinterested in the harm she’s experienced herself and viewing any acknowledgement of it and its influence on her actions as coddling her.
like if i thought that the takeaway of imogen's story was that she does the things she does because she's selfish and manipulative, as opposed to indecisive and insecure and angry at the world, i would also see her and laudna's relationship as festering with unspoken resentments, stagnant instead of stabilizing. of course imodna doesn't make sense if you brush off the years of isolation and ostracization imogen faced as inessential to her character, and even more so if you think it was justified or largely her fault. because then the core thing that connects her and laudna - finding someone like them for the first time after years of excrutiating loneliness, and being not just accepted but loved for the same things that made them monstrous in the eyes of everyone else - is rendered meaningless.
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ganondoodle · 10 months
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the more time goes on the more negative i feel about totk, its got lots of reasons but aside from me thinking about what else they could have easily done instead of what we got its more and more bc its so put on a pedestal like its the best zelda ever and also its affecting botw in retrospect, not just by the lore, but the fact that people have been saying even shortly after totks release that theres 'no point playing botw' anymore, and will see botw as nothing but totks "bad" prototype is just SO infuriating to me
you know when you initially feel neutral (or ignorable dislike) about a character but then the fandom for some reason gets so insanely obsessed with them that you just start disliking them more and more over time ... yeah
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atalienart · 7 months
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What's wrong with naming months in fantasy world the same they're called in our world when the whole world is made up? I get it when there are two worlds (our regular and made up one) next to each other, it might add some otherworldly personality to the fantastic setting but if there's just one fictional reality why can't it have October? If you call it Pumpker does that make your world more fantastic and you a better worldbuilder? Then why would you call a teapot a teapot? Why not an infusionpan? If your world has months then you can call them with names everyone's familiar with, or just come up with a new language all together. Like, I don't see why this is so controversial to not change the names of the months.
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give-grian-rights · 6 months
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i was so fucking ready for when Blue Beetle came out, thinking there'd be an inflex of fics. a reasonable amount, y'know, since DC doesn't fucking advertise their movies. and now here we are with like. probably 8 even TAGGED AS JAIME in the last month .
on my hands and knees begging y'all to watch Blue Beetle (2023) when it hits streaming this weekend PLEASE?
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gertritude · 6 months
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sorry to talk about the quarry again but i simply cannot get over this. why did they not make it so that the werewolf curse had been passed down in the hackett family for generations or something. why was it called "the quarry" when the actual quarry in the game was superfluous. why was there like zero closure for any of the characters. can someone rewrite this game so it caters to ME by just making it about an evil werewolf family who purposefully lures people into the area to hunt them in a like "most dangerous game" scenario. that would be so much more fun
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mbat · 1 year
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by the way this was after like 127 pages of murders, gore and body horror, war, anime-style battles with OP powers, and literal gods granting power to popular cartoon characters who also have been harmed in many fucked up ways
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