who smokes the biggest, fattest, nastiest blunts in homestuck?
john: he is from the suburbs. if earth b wasn't destroyed he would've smoked not only weed, but would've probably done shrooms as well. maybe even crack
rose: has definitely done weed but is now staying sober. not just to help with her alcoholism, but also because she gets extremely paranoid when she does and starts lighting candles everywhere to get rid of the smell and it's a literal fire hazard.
dave: talks the most shit but gets nervous and clammy when he's first handed a bong and it slips out of his shaking, sweaty hands and shatters into pieces all over the floor and no one offers him weed ever again
jane: doesn't touch the stuff because she "doesn't have the time for it" but the one time she decides to take a hit it has no effect on her at all and she gets extremely frustrated and takes a couple more, lies down, and then immediately enters the deepest, longest sleep of her life to the point that everyone else around her gets very concerned
jake: says he's never really been into drugs until someone informs him that the mushrooms he dug up behind meemaw's garden shed as a kid and ate to see funny movies in his head were, in fact, a form of drug
roxy: has actually never done weed and the one time she was given a bong has also dropped it with her sweaty gamer hands and had it shatter all over the floor
dirk: knows that weed could potentially help calm him down, let go of his hyper-vigilance, give relief from his constant self-inflicted anxiety, and help him achieve a state of inner peace. which is why he stays stone cold sober
all the trolls: they literally sleep in cbd slime
jade: snoop dogg
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