#this isn’t related but I love it so much when my dog sleeps in my room with me

[sofasoap]

Holding you

Pairing : John Price x F!Reader

Summary: After months apart from each other, nothing better than waking up with the love of your life, and helping him with his.... "little problem".

You can either read it as a standalone, or as part of my Mini MacTavish verse, continuation after Come back to me.

Warning: Explicit. Smut, slight angst.

I apologise for any inaccuracies describing military related stuff.

A/N : This was an extension of a little midnight drabble I wrote a while ago thanks to my midnight muse @a-small-writer-in-a-big-world. I hope you will enjoy this Price ramble.

“masterlist” 

You slowly stirred awake as you feel someone gently caressing your cheek. 

Eyes fluttering open, you saw the beautiful blue eyes of your husband, gazing down at you lovingly.

"Morning love." He greeted you in his morning husky voice." Had a good sleep??

"Hmmm hmm." You close your eyes with a smile, snuggling closer to him, savouring his gentle touch. Oh how you have missed him. 

You haven’t seen each other for months. Seven months, fourteen days. But who's counting?

Apart from being absolute workaholics, fate seems to be determined to interfere with the two of you. From the tumultuous courtship, near death experiences, now trying to keep the marriage intact with so much time apart from each other.

When you are home from your deployment, he is already flying halfway across the world, ready for his next mission. When he arrived back in the UK, you were on your way to meet up with your team with KorTac.

Communication was hard. A little ten second voicemail in your inbox will be the last thing you heard from him for weeks. And a quick “I love you” text send out to him before going into a black op mission.

You will always find a little handwritten post-it note, with his worn shirt on the kitchen table when you come home between missions. John isn’t a man with many words, but you can still feel his emotions conveyed through the short sentences, how much he misses you, how much he loves you and wishing you were with him. 

Sometimes you will wake up from a nightmare, dreaming of Laswell showing up at your front door, with John’s dog tag and his personal belongings. One look at her face you knew what had happened.

You cried yourself to sleep every time, wearing his shirt, curling up, inhaling the faint residue cigar and gunpowder scent and trying to imagine his strong arm around you.

It was only two days ago you received a call from Laswell. Seeing her name showing up on your caller ID sends your mind into an endless spiral. She never calls you unless it was for any urgent business. Or an emergency. Or something has happened to one of the men. Or…. 

You always wake up right before she opens her mouth and delivers the bad news,silent scream that is stuck in your throat, heart pounding, tears streaming down your face,panic sets in until you realise you are in your own cot, in the middle of a shared tent on a mission.

Horangi and König will always know what happened the next day, with your red rimmed and dark baggy eyes.  None of them are the type that will give you verbal comfort, but a bag of Korean snacks which you mentioned once that was your favourite and a little tin of handmade sweets will appear on your cot at the end of the day.

You always smile at their thoughtfulness. 

“Are you going to pick up that call?” Horangi looking over your shoulder, “ Laswell? Must be important.”

Flexing your hand, you shook your head, trying to dispel the negative thought that was muddling your brain before nodding. 

Answering with a wavering voice, grabbing tight to the wedding ring underneath your shirt that is chained together with your dog tag, expecting the worst.

You must have sounded more distraught than expected, “John is fine. I am just letting you know the men are on their way back, they should land by late afternoon.“ She reassured you immediately. 

“Go. Just submit the report by this weekend.” König pushed you out of the office as soon as he overheard the conversation. He knew how anxious you were to get back home. 

You took the first flight you can get your hand on to the UK, drove straight from the airport to the base at Credenhill, despite your own weariness, you want to be there to greet your husband as soon as he lands.

Pulling into the car park of the base, you caught a glimpse of the helicopter coming into landing. 

You don’t know how long the two of you have been standing there for, until the other men came over and gave you a slight pat on the back, interrupting the reunion.

The guard at the gate recognises you and you run towards the landing pad as soon as they process and issue you with a visitor’s pass.

You felt your heart going to burst the moment you saw him walking out from the helo, finally being able to see him physically, safe and sound.

“JOHN!” you yelled out to him, catching his attention. Turning around, surprise was evident on his face as you barreled into his embrace. Grabbing tight onto his vest, you burst out crying. All the months contained worry, fear, doubts and longing emotions released all in one go. You heard John murmuring words of assurances into your ears, feeling of his slight unkempt beard caressing against your face as he peppers you with kisses,tightens his arm around you. 

Smiling sheepishly, leaving John’s embrace to give each of the men a tight hug, glad all of them made it back in one piece. 

“We know how much you miss the Captain. Don’t break the bed from too much fun tonight!!!” Gaz teased as they waved goodbye to you and John. He rolled his eyes while your face was burning up like a furnace, from the embarrassment and thinking what was to come that night. 

A soft kiss on the lip, bringing you back from reverie, John adjusted himself slightly, sliding his hand down towards your breast and thigh." Well, since you are awake.... "giving you another kiss, this time with more passion and sliding his tongue into your mouth, before breaking apart, "I think you should help me with my... little problem down here. " he grinds against you as he emphasises  the word  little problem. 

You let out a chuckle, teasing him,“ Last night wasn’t enough for you??” 

“I will never get enough from my beautiful wife.” His voice dripping with both sincerity and need. 

He slowly trails his kisses down your neck towards your chest, pausing to caress the bites and bruises that are spread all over your neck and shoulder. 

“… sore?” Murmuring with a hint of guilt in his voice, regretting being rough on you the previous night.

You never seen him so needy and rough before, releasing all the frustration, the pent up energy of not being able to see you, to be there with you physically and emotionally for such a long time.  He made you cum twice before reaching the bedroom, and the countless times during the night you begged him again and again to reassure you he is there, in your arm, limbs intertwine with each others, not just some figment of imagination and dreams you wake up again and again from, to an empty cold bed.

Shaking your head as you card your finger through his messy morning hair,drifting down to his beard, smiling with silent reassurance for him to continue on.

Kneading and sucking each of the breasts with the utmost care, making sure he isn’t causing more pain. You let out a contented sigh as he slowly pushes your legs apart, running his tongue languidly across your already damp slit. 

‘John… Love…” grabbing onto the bed sheet, pleading with him to give you more, to quench that fire he is stirring up within. 

“Patience. I want to just enjoy…” lapping up more of your wetness that is sipping out between your slit, “tasting you. Feeling you.” His eyes shifted up to meet with you for a moment, “ Loving you.”

You sucked in a big breath of air at his words, holding back a sob. All you can think of is how lucky you are, to have such a wonderful man, who cherishes you, accepting and putting up with all your faults, ( as the 141 men once mentioned Price was probably the only one that can hold you back on a leash to contain your recklessness.) always aims to please you, putting your needs before his. 

In a dazed post orgasm mind, you see him crawling back up towards you, stroking your face before positioning his already dripping hard cock and pushing into your still sensitive core.   

In contrast to the frantic sex the night before, peeling each other’s clothes off as soon as you pass through the threshold of the door, hands roaming everywhere, desperate for each other’s touch, how you want him to be inside you, filling that void you've been missing for the last few months. 

Now he is just taking his time to relish the short time together. Both of you know it won’t be too long before duty calls again, splitting the two of you apart. 

You don’t want to think that far. Pushing that thought to the back of your mind, you nudge his shoulder, for him to lean back so you can push yourself up, adjusting yourself to straddle him. 

You clench down hard as he hits you in a sweet spot in this new position, eliciting a moan from him. You smile lazily, rolling your hips, arms around his neck, one hand lightly caressing the nape of his neck, determined to return the favour, making sure he is enjoying it as much as you do. His hand wanders down towards your butt, grabbing both cheeks, pulling you close to him as he can.

You can feel him getting close as he rolls his head back, breathing starting to get erratic, his hip slamming up towards you, trying to chase the high.

“It’s ok love.. just let it go…I want to feel you inside me.. coat me with your hot cum, show you how much you love me…” You whispered into his ear, enticing him. Tipped over the edge with your words, he let out a loud groan as he filled you up inside. With a few more thrust from him as he rides out his orgasm, you bury your face into the crook of his neck, biting down hard on his shoulder,reaching your own high.  

“Ready to go again?? I don’t think my problem has been solved… with just one round”  He asked with his raspy voice as you felt his cock twitching inside you, getting hard again.  You laughed , and leaned in to give him a deep kiss before letting him lowering you back into the bed. 

You and Price didn't get out of bed until way past noon. 

If you are reading this as part of Mini MacTavish verse... Mini and Price are both absolute workaholics, spending more time away from each other than together until they both retire from front line. in my H/C, they never ended up having any kids. by choice or not by choice? you decide. But they are happily to shower their love on their nieces and nephews ( the little rascals Soap has produced lol ).

I apologise for bit of jumble of the smut part. I have no idea why every single time I start writing for Price x Reader, I am always in a slump depressive stage. but hey, I had bit of fun writing, I might revisit and tidy this up when I am in a better place mentally.

Tag :

@floral-force

@homicidal-slvt

@captainpriceslover

@a-small-writer-in-a-big-world

#captain john price #john price x you #john price x reader #john price imagine #john price #captain price x reader #captain price #captain john price x reader #captain john price x you #captain john price x female reader #call of duty #Mini Mactavish verse #call of duty fanfic

[livingfast04]

Monster Au? - Part 2

part one II part three I’ll post a snort snippet of Part three when I get ready to post this on ao3, or I might post this as just a tumblr thing. I’m not sure yet, I have kind of an idea of what I want. but also not really. However I also don’t want to conflict with “An Untuned Piano” (which if you haven’t read before you should totally go and do that-) and this was just a little break for my messy brain.  TW for Vomit- and a little body horror- (this hardly scrapes the surface of the terrible, terrible ideas I have. My poor little Hurt No Comfort Brain is mean)  ---

Steve hated how much he identified with the creature, with Frankenstein’s Monster. It made his skin prickle, that was his threshold for, for relating to a character. A creature whose creator turned on him- a creature that kills every person who had the capability to love him, and then himself.

Even now, tucked against the couch watching his friends pile together, touching in some way. Steve felt sick to his stomach, knotted and messy. He wasn’t sure what to think. His belly ached, and he wasn’t even sure if it was rebelling food he couldn’t process or if he felt like an outsider in his own space.

After everything, after 83’, after the Junkyard, and the Tunnels- the Demo-dogs, after Russians and the mall. 

After Vecna. 

Of the kids getting attached to Eddie, Eddie who is a vampire- Eddie who only lived because of that fact. Came out of the bats almost completely unscarred, unscratched- with a mouthful of blood, and fear in his eyes. 

Steve envied that, the quick healing, the way Eddie bounced back faster than any of them really, right next to Max and her single broken arm. The wolf sleeping in her bones pushing her further than Vecna could even dare to go.

Now they push into Steve’s space, into his house with little care for what Steve thinks. It’s their space, pack space, coven space. And Steve shouldn’t care because he’s human. Not wolf like Robin and Hopper, not Born-Witch like the Byers-Hopper Clan, not Made Witch like the Wheeler Siblings, not Dragon as the Sinclar siblings are, not Gremlin like Dustin or even remotely close to being a Vampire like Eddie- not, not- 

Steve was human, and it was just his house, and it shouldn’t matter if they want to stay in it for hours. It shouldn’t matter if Steve said no, if Steve didn’t want them there. It was their space now. He should enjoy having people in his house after being alone for so long- but the way they treat it, as if Steve’s the interloper.

It was driving him nuts. 

He couldn’t keep anything down, processed foods he wasn’t supposed to eat filled the tables- foods that Joyce cooked, or Hopper when he made breakfast. It was twisting around in his head, curling his stomach and turning it over.

It was his space, and he couldn’t mark it as his own. No, scratch that it was his father’s space. 

Why Hopper had no sway over him, why every forceful remark from Nancy stung. Steve wasn’t a part of whatever kind of pack had collected in his living room. He wasn’t allowed to be, not until he had his Father’s permission, or they recognized him as a part of it. 

And they hadn’t.

They probably never would. Not with the way they all seemed to dislike that Steve was even around half the time. But it’s fine, it’s okay. His skin crawls, all the perfect edges, the ones that he shapes, molds, covers up how bad the scars around his neck actually look, about how his stomach isn’t fully healed. His skin is struggling to stitch itself back together with the lack of proper care. 

Steve’s missing chunks, muscle, skin, fat- his body moves and changes. There’s limits, and caring for himself as he’s supposed to is hard when he’s supposed to wear human skin. He’s not supposed to wear it for one- he can’t heal like this. 

So all imperfections are covered, hidden away. Bites his tongue and hopes he can keep down whatever processed meal he’s eaten. Avoid Eddie’s imploring Vampire snitching gaze every time he tears a stitch. 

His stomach knotted painfully another time. And Steve was on his feet, don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic- It wasn’t discomfort this time, not with the saliva pooled on his tongue. He stumbled slightly, bile rising in his throat. His head spun as he stood, and his knees threatened to buckle-

---

Eddie watched with sharp eyes as Steve stood from his place on the couch, part of him wanted to coo, call out the other to join the pile. Curl around him and remind everyone that Steve was Eddie’s.

He worked his jaw as the younger boy shuffled out of the living room and down the hallway to the bathroom. Eddie’s sharper ears heard the sink turn on almost as soon as The door shut, which was unusual. Eddie twitched, disturbing Dustin who was sprawled across him.

Under the sound of water running was the sound of retching. Eddie’s face screwed up in sympathy. Oh damn, how long had Steve sat there feeling bad? How did Eddie not notice? Over everything, all the little things. With the way anxiety made Steve’s pulse beat far to fast- 

Eddie tapped Dustin’s side “Up.”

Dustin grumbled, a long drawn out why, as he wiggled around for a moment, but ultimately flopped off Eddie. Right on to Mike who let out a groan at the sudden impact to his ribs. Eddie ruffled his curls, pushing the boy's head around a little bit.

“Going to go check on Harrington.” Interrupting bonding time, the displeasure was loud in the air, but Eddie could hear Steve’s heart kick, thumping anxiously. And he couldn’t just leave it. Not with the way he’d watched the boy slightly stumble before all but bolting for the open bathroom door.

Not with how in tune he had accidentally become of the human. “He’s just in the bathroom-“ Nancy’s voice was rough, half asleep from where she was tucked between Robin and Jonathan. Eddie looked over the gathered group with raised eyebrows. He knows that some of them probably could hear Steve over the water running.

Eddie snorted, a little bit of a bitter sound. “Yeah Puking.” That startled Robin who jerked up right. Her ears weren’t completely useless like this, but there was a small chance that she wasn’t used to recognizing Steve as much anymore. The human had pulled back some from the group, Robin had been almost inconsolable for over two weeks over it. 

That she couldn’t recognize his footsteps, or his breathing patterns. That Steve was hardly around outside of work anymore, and it was devastating. They’d been bonded, they were bonded, a pair. Eddie had been sympathetic, but he remembers asking if she’d even talked to Steve about it.

Nancy had been more vocal in her displeasure for Steve’s actions. Eddie wanted to ask them if they knew that Steve smelled like blood, and healing. As if there wasn’t a clotting heavy smell of skin stitching itself back together. Maybe Steve was retreating because he was hurting, and uncomfortable. 

That the smell of blood wasn’t going away and it was making Eddie anxious.

“I’ve got him, Buckley. Lay back down.” Eddie moved around the pile of sleepy bodies, eyeing the adults in the kitchen as he passed, and then paused in front of the bathroom door. His feet quiet on the floor.

He tapped softly on the door, knocking his knuckles just slightly against the wood. The Retching hadn’t stopped, if anything the closer Eddie got he could hear just how painful it sounded. The smell of blood was underlying, and it set him on fire. That wasn’t right. It wasn’t. “Harrington? You alright?” The toilet flushed, not quite covering the gag that Steve made. Eddie knocked on the door again, leaning against the door frame.

“‘M fine, Ed’ie,” he didn’t sound fine. Eddie hummed under his breath.

“You don’t sound fine.” There was a pause, the water hadn’t stopped running, and Eddie was starting to get nervous. Steve’s pulse was jackrabbiting hard. “Can I come in?” He pressed his palm against the doorknob, the metal was frigid. Steve was quiet, and then Eddie hears another gag- and then what sounds like dry heaving. 

Fuck, okay- that’s, “I’m coming in Harrington.” Eddie pushes open the door, not locked- which is good, he really doesn’t want to break a door. The light isn’t even turned on, and it takes his eyes a minute to understand the difference. He steps fully into the space and shuts the door behind him.

Steve is hunched over the toilet, legs curled uncomfortably. “Go away Munson.” Eddie reaches out to turn the sink off, the handle squeaks. Before sinking down to sit on the small bathroom floor next to the other.

The smell of blood was thicker now that he was sharing the space. Eddie worked his jaw, pricking his lips slightly with his teeth. “Steve.” His voice is hard, and it draws wet hazel eyes to his face, they dart around slightly, before falling back to look at the toilet. “Are you bleeding?” Yes, Eddie knew this, could all but taste it, and it was making his skin crawl because it was wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Steve’s whole form shuttered, curling tighter around the toilet. He retches again, and doesn’t respond. The bathroom didn’t smell like healing, and the blood that comes with it. It smelled like distress, vomit, and blood.

Eddie reached out to touch Steve’s shoulder, his body curled away from the outstretched touch. His creature hissed low in his belly, angry at the rejection, Steve was his. God he hated imprinting on Humans.

But this didn’t feel like flinching away from Eddie because he was well, Eddie. But rather a curl away because he was uncomfortable and touch wouldn’t help. So Eddie pulled back. He could hear Steve’s heart jackrabbit, the anxiety heavy in the air. “What can I do to help?” 

“Go away.” Eddie blinked, well fuck you to then. He huffed, standing up, offense now filling his chest.

“You are literally vomiting in your toilet- and you want me to just leave?” Eddie lowered his eyebrows, looking at Steve’s shaking form with something close to a glare. Steve didn’t even bother to look up. 

“I didn’t ask for your help, just go back- to, to the living room, and the pile of people who don’t live in my fucking house.” Eddie jolted, echoed into the porcelain and muffled as it was, there was almost a growl to the tone, low and sharp. Maybe Steve was spending too much time around them. Eddie hissed, mind realizing Steve was claiming their space-

He jerked up to stand, “Fine then, suffer by yourself. And it’s your house, but it’s our space.” 

Steve’s body was shaking harder as Eddie turned to leave, hands curled around the toilet seat, holding onto it. “Fuck off Munson.”

Eddie slammed the door behind him. Chest heaving, his whole body giving a hard shake, trying to rid himself of the smell of blood. He wandered back into the living room, flopped down in his spot, and curled around Dustin. “Eddie?” 

Robin’s voice was hesitant, he lifted his face slightly to look at her, “You okay?” Was Steve okay? She was anxious, that was telling from the way she was clinging to Max who had burrowed into her side. 

“Fine.” He bites it out, the word feels too sharp, but he was hot, and angry. 

He can hear Steve leaves the bathroom maybe 20 minutes later, and he goes upstairs instead of coming back to the living room. Maybe it’s for the better.

---

#steddie #steddie ficlet #Liv is losing their mind #steve harrington #eddie musnon #monster au??? #steve x eddie #ficlet #my brain hurts #steve harrington whump #monster steve #vampire eddie munson #shapeshifter steve harrington #steddie monster au?

[nightghoul381]

Dark If ~ Jude Jazza

This a fan translation so it is definitely not 100% accurate. I do not own anything related to Ikemen Villains. Support Cybird by buying their amazing stories!

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Bitter End | Premium End | Epilogue

Thus, the Thorn Princess fell into a 100-year sleep due to a curse, but was awakened by a princes kiss,

And they lived happily ever after--.

Kate: “…I, I haven’t been kissed by a prince…”

A passage from The Thorn Princess that I’d read when I lived in England came back to me and I couldn’t help but mutter to myself.

Thorn Ellis: “Is something wrong?”

Kate: “Ah, no….While I was sleeping in this castle, didn’t my father or the military invade looking for me…?”

When I woke up, I was told that my father, the King, had passed away while I was sleeping.

I was worried for a while that I had parted with him in an impersonal way, but

After visiting his grave, I was able to sort out my feelings a little.

Moreover…because he cursed me and stole me from my father, he earned the hatred of all the people,

When I think of Jude, who is still hated and feared 100 years later, I can’t help but wince.

(I don’t want you to regret what you did to help me.)

So, although I had never really thought about it in depth, I suddenly became interested.

Thorn Ellis: “Aah…now that I think about it, I think there was one time.”

Thorn Ellis: “Jude had told me, so I mostly chased them away.”

Kate: “Eh…”

Thorn Ellis: “I was trying to get you back home unscathed as much as possible.”

Thorn Ellis: “It seems like all the people who came when I wasn’t there were stripped and kicked out by Jude.”

Thorn Ellis: “Sometimes there were people left hanging around for a while.”

Apparently, all of the princes were being attacked like thorns by the Wizard of the Thorn Castle and his assistant.

(In order for this world to have a happy ending.)

(Maybe it would’ve been right for me to wake up after being kissed by one of them.)

There is something missing in this world—Those words have always stuck with me.

(But…)

(If it meant I had to kiss someone other than Jude… I would rather stay in the distorted world.)

Kate: “…Thank you very much for protecting me.”

Thorn Ellis: “Mmhmm, you’re welcome.”

Jude the Wizard: “Isn’t it weird that you’re still thanking us for that?”

Kate: “! Jude, welcome home!”

When I hear that voice, my heart leaps on its own.

I jumped up from the couch and ran over to Jude.

Jude the Wizard: “You jump on me every time, are you a dog?”

Jude said slyly, avoiding me and sitting down quickly on the sofa.

It had been several months since I woke up from my sleep and tried to live faithfully to my love.

Kate: “I wanted to see you, so I guess it can’t be helped.”

Jude the Wizard: “Yeah, yeah, I’m impressed by how strong you are.”

It seemed that Jude still thought of me as a little girl or something.

(…I would like to be recognized more as a woman.)

(Is it because my mental age is too different as someone who has been asleep for 100 years…?)

The collar I wore when we met still adorns my neck.

I was told that it wasn’t really something that would make my head blow up, so I could remove it as I wanted, but…

I feel like I’m connected and tied to him, and I was so happy—I couldn’t take it off.

--At night, when I couldn’t sleep, I snuck into Jude’s study.

(This pile of books was all meant to cure my illness, right?)

On the one hand, I feel like Jude is so vindictive and endearing, but on the other hand,

I yearn for him, wishing that he had directed his attachment not only toward my illness, but also toward me.

(Currently, I guess I’m only seen as a laborer repaying my debt to Jude.)

(Of course, I would be happy to be of use, as promised…)

(I’m greedy. That’s not enough.)

A feeling of helpless sadness washes over me.

(…This room smells like Jude.)

The love that continues to build in my chest makes my entire body ache.

Kate: “Jude…”

I touched my lips with my fingertips.

(I don’t need a kiss from a prince…)

Kate: “…If I kiss you… will you be more conscious of me?”

Jude the Wizard: “I thought it was impressive that you were spending your evenings studying…”

Jude the Wizard: “What are you thinking of, pervert?”

Kate: “…!?”

When I turned around, I saw Jude leaning against the door with a sneer on his face.

(Jude!? When did you get into the study…)

Kate: “Um, that was…”

Jude the Wizard: “What, are you frustrated?”

My face heats up as I hear my exasperated murmur.

I bit my lip in frustration, feel as thought I was being mocked and insulted.

Kate: “Yes, if you’re asking… maybe I am.”

Kate: “But that doesn’t mean I want just anyone to notice me and touch me like this.”

Jude narrowed his amethyst eyes as he stared at me.

Jude the Wizard: “… Sounds like you’re saying you’re horny because you’re with me.”

Kate: “…Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.”

Even if he smoked me, even if he hated me. I wanted to make that point clear.

Kate: “Is it bothersome to be treated like that by a mere worker who’s simply paying off a debt?”

Jude the Wizard: “—a mere worker?”

After not moving at all until then, Jude suddenly twitched his eyebrows as he spat out the words.

Jude the Wizard: “… you really don’t get it.”

Kate: “Huh…?”

Jude’s long fingers slip between the nape of my neck and the collar.

Kate: “…Ah…”

The tips of his nails scratched my skin, and the insides of my body, which had been aching ever since I came into this room, trembled sweetly.

He pulled me in and brought my face closer to his.

Jude the Wizard: “I don’t think I’d spend 100 years working to cure someone I thought of as nothing more than labor.”

Jude the Wizard: “You’ve been licked, haven’t you?”

Kate: “Haah…?

My back begins to hurt from being pressed against the bookshelf.

When the collar was ripped off of me and my wrists were tied together—

I felt a soft sensation on the back of my neck where the needle had been inserted.

(Huh…?)

The moment I realized that those were Jude’s lips, my whole body shuddered.

Kate: “…ngh… ahh…”

A hard sensation touches my skin and slowly sinks into it, as if to instill pain.

(Jude is biting…?)

The numbness permeates through my entire body and I feel like my legs are losing strength and I’m about to collapse, but…

Jude’s knee, wedged between my legs, won’t let me.

Jude the Wizard: “…You said that before I put you to sleep.”

Jude the Wizard: “Because you said that, I couldn’t let you die.”

The shimmering amethyst looking down at me becomes distorted.

Jude the Wizard: “Ah… I guess I said it wrong.”

Jude the Wizard: “Because it was you, I couldn’t let you get away.”

Kate: “Jude…”

I was happy, I wanted him to touch me, I wanted to kiss him, I wanted to stare at him,

Jude looked down at me mockingly.

Jude the Wizard: “Oh, but I won’t, will I? No kissing, nothing more.”

Kate: “…ngh, why?”

Jude the Wizard: “You made me wait 100 years—so it’s not fair if I should satisfy your desires right away, is it?”

Jude the Wizard: “At best, you’ll get impatient, sulk and suffer.”

Jude the Wizard: “You’re not the kind of person to give up, so you can last 100 years, can’t you?”

Kate: “---That’s in such bad taste…!”

Jude the Wizard: “Ha… We’re alike.”

Painfully, so painfully, my whole body pulses and won’t stop.

Desiring him like crazy, the scorching heat invades even my thoughts.

(I don’t need a prince’s kiss.)

(A happy ending means going back to my original world.)

If he gives me this agonizingly sweet pain—that would be the greatest happiness to me.

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Bitter End | Premium End | Epilogue

#ikemen villains #ikevil #ikemen villains translation #ikevil translation #jude jazza #ikevil jude #ikevil jude jazza #ikemen villains jude #ikemen villains jude jazza

[ryuichirou]

Recent artworks related asks!

Since we got quite a lot of them, and my replies to these are rather short, I hope it’s okay for me to put them all in one post.

If I missed your message, I am super sorry! Thank you to everyone for your lovely words and for your support. Every asks we receive makes our day hehehe.

Alright, let’s go-

Anonymous asked:

Azul 100% had to put a leash on Idia so he wouldn’t run off, like a fucking backpack kid or hyperactive dog

(This is about this art)

Putting Idia on a leash would have been so much easier… 😔 He is so energetic and fast whenever he wants to run away from something.

Anonymous asked:

*Sees Deuce's injuries* How did he got hurt?

(This is about this art)

Oh, it’s just some dirt.

It was meant to be a post-Vargas camp thing, but honestly, these two can get into this kind of situation anytime by their own lol

Anonymous asked:

MY FIRST THOUGHT WHEN I SAW YOUR ADEUCE ART WAS "OMG SOMNO", IT DIDN'T EVEN OCCUR TO ME THAT ACE COULD ALSO BE SLEEPING

(This is about this art)

LOL ANON  YOUR KINK IS SHOWING it’s okay, Ace being asleep doesn’t change the fact that he can do stuff in his sleep…or that he isn’t pretending to be asleep lol

Honestly it’s a shame that we haven’t done anything somno-related yet.

(We do have one ask about this topic if I remember correctly, it’ll take some time for me to reply... )

Anonymous asked:

Truth to be told, ever since you posted an art of Jack and Deuce that says Jack will rail Deuce, I really can't wait to truly see Jack rail against Deuce. 😍😍😍

(This is about this art)

Today I learned the crucial difference between railing someone and railing against someone LOL

Honestly, Jack could do both, he is both righteous and horny enough.

I would love to draw a nsfw of them one day…

Anonymous asked:

Jade looks at mushrooms like Sebastian looks at cats

(This is about this art)

True, true. Well, it’s not his fault that mushroom are so perfect…

Anonymous asked:

Neige gives the vibes that he’d ask to redo the kissing scene several times cause ‘it didn’t feel right’ or something. Meanwhile Vils over here like nope it was fine can i pls leave

(This is about this art)

Ahh, the perfectionism~ And one and only moment in Vil’s life when he suffers from other person’s perfectionism and wants to leave things as they are lol Neige should get his chance and get all the kisses in the world from Vil while he still can!

#replies

[sparklingsin]

THE STRANGER THINGS SPOOKINKTOBER WRITING CHALLENGE!

calling all stranger things writers! i am a hosting a spookinktober (a combination of spooktober and kinktober) writing challenge for the older stranger things characters!

note: you must be 18+ to enter this challenge!

how it works

reblog this post! (sorry but better reach)

send me an ask with any prompts from the list below and a character you want to write for. you can choose how many ever prompts you like in whatever combination (e.g. one from the spooky prompts and two from kinky or only one from kinky etc.)

prompts are not tied to a person, but picking unique, unchosen prompts is encouraged. (prompts that are being used by one or more people will have an ☆ against them)

each ask counts as one fic and you can send as many asks as you like!

there is no restriction on the type of fic (fluff/smut/angst/anything)

it can be a blurb, a one shot, a series, a 23k word fic, but it has to be a reader insert!

tag me and/or use the hashtag #strangertober when posting. (also please mention what your prompts are in the fic, or link to your ask if possible) posting starts on 1st of october and the soft deadline is 31st october, of course, which is when i will be organising the fics into a giant masterlist! you can continue posting after but please try to post it asap since it is an october related challenge!

and that's it! please send me an ask/dm me any questions you may have.

happy writing! 🎃👄

prompts below the cut:

SPOOKY PROMPTS: (this is a combination of sentence starters, settings and random words you can use in the fics)

There was a howling in the distance, but it was coming closer and closer. Now, it was too late to run. ☆

"This is bad. This is very very bad." ☆

"I bet you won't manage to scare me tonight!"☆

"Haha, look! This pumpkin looks just like you!"

“Would you stop stuffing your face with candy for one moment and listen???”☆

“Well that doesn't sound good. Fucking hell.”

“Does that even count as a costume? Or lingerie?” ☆

Making out in a graveyard can lead to some very unexpected things. ☆

“This isn’t a ghost story. It’s a creature features. It’s really happening, and you’re all in it.”

“We are not doing a couple’s costume.”  ☆

Car doesn’t start

“How do you expect me to sleep after that?”

“Show me your haul.”

Falling, fruit picking, and a rain storm ☆

Playing with Ouija Boards

“You look ridiculous. I love it.”☆

“I dare you to go down there.”

“Is it just me or did it just get really cold in here?”

“You were gone…I watched you disappear.”

“Somebody’s watching us.”

"It is pretty spooky down here and it smells pretty unnatural so… Yeah. Okay. I’m coming back up." ☆

"I’m scared to close my eyes. I’m scared to open them. "

" Whatever you do, don't fall asleep."

“Can you stop breathing down my neck?” “Dude, I’m over here.” ☆

Pumpkin carving, a haunted forest, and oversized sweaters ☆

"You're holding my hand." "I just don't want to get lost in the woods at night." ☆

“Alright, well, it looks like a pit of eternal darkness so…”

Late night, consistent door knocking, and an empty front porch. ☆

"Quick, switch costumes with me." ☆

trick-or-treating shenanigans ☆

graveyard ☆

scary movie night ☆

halloween party ☆

too many shadows

cave at a beach, moonlight ☆

in a dark and deserted side hall of an infamous library ☆

halloween sleepover ☆

trapped in a haunted house

haunted house date ☆

large dog

black cat ☆

pumpkins

clowns ☆

dark clouds, an empty house ☆

three knocks, a child crying

abandoned house ☆

spook decorations

a room full of candles ☆

KINKY PROMPTS: (again, this is a mix of dialogues and specific kinks)

Shower sex ☆

"Be brave for me, baby."

Car sex ☆

" I’m not wearing any underwear. thought you’d like to know." ☆

Sixty-nining

"Show me how much you missed me." ☆

Praise kink

“Wanna join?”

Erotic photos

"Want me to serenade you while you strip?" ☆

Nipple play

"Never tease me like that again. "

“Touch me and you lose.” ☆

Breeding kink ☆

"Keep talking shit and I'll show you the other things I can do with that mouth of yours." ☆

"It's hot when you talk back." ☆

Fingering ☆

Cockwarming ☆

"If you think being in public is going to stop me, you're sorely mistaken." ☆

Thigh riding ☆

“I came so hard last night just from a picture of you." ☆

"I've never been this wet before.”

Orgy

"Did i give you permission to come?" ☆

Corruption kink ☆

“I’m hard/wet.” “Sounds like a personal problem.” ☆

Phone sex

Public sex

Semi-public sex

Voyeurism

"Be a good boy/girl and spread your legs."

Edging

"You're mine, and only mine."

Mirror sex ☆

"Please, just touch me."

Squirting

"I missed your hands so much."

Cock worship

"Don't make me stop this car, because I promise you, you'll regret it." ☆

Cosplay/costume

"I've been thinking about your fingers all this time."

Skinny dipping ☆

"Bite your lip one more time and we'll have a serious problem." ☆

Dirty talk

note: you can use other kinks etc ofc (except non/dub-con) but your fic must include atleast ONE of these prompts to be a part of this challenge.

Excited to read what everyone writes! Have fun!

tagging some mutuals for visibility (you don't have to participate but a reblog would help!!<3): @sunshinehollandd @angeloddity @taylorsmylover @royalmaybank @lurkymurker @silkscream @darthkenobii @sophia-busch @magicchai

*sourced these prompts from various tumblrs and google

#stranger things #stranger things x reader #steve harrington x reader #eddie munson x reader #robin buckley x reader #nancy wheeler x reader #steve harrington smut #eddie munson smut #stranger things smut #stranger things fanfic #steve harrington #eddie munson #strangertober

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

since i have a migraine and stomach flu maybe i can get some platonic mass/loui stuff?

❤️

*le happy gasp* MI ÁNGEL 🥺🥺 Ofc you can, love <3

there are so many "My dad forced into a war" jokes that go on in between these two scary mfs and they think they’re some goddamn comedians when in reality the other states are just concerned 😭

They bond over talking about all the scary sh*t thats happened in their states (NOLA is #4 and Salem is #5 on the most haunted American cities list help-)

Mass’s cat, Mayflower (who is 100% a black cat with golden eyes) seems to only really like Loui. She hisses at literally everybody else, even Mass himself, but the moment that Loui enters a room, she cuddles up to him and basically does all the happy kitty stuff :]

Hurt one, you hurt the other. Which can be very bad for your mental and physical health. Just sayin.

These two pull off the BEST spooky pranks and for some reason Alaska seems to be their favorite state to scare.

Mass 100% knows how to do dreads and braids because he’s helped Loui multiple times. (Also I’m not gonna say that he uses this knowledge to help Mary with her/his/their hair, but 👁️👁️-)

Mass has been dealing with the spirits for FOREVER, and is pretty used to them by now. Whereas Loui somehow isn’t used to them, so Mass helps him on the REALLY bad nights.

Loui apologizes for literally EVERYTHING, and Mass just refuses to apologize for sh*t. So cue Mass telling Loui to stop apologizing for stuff so much and Loui telling Mass to start apologizing more.

At this point, keeping an arm out around Loui is second nature for Mass. Cuz Loui is clumsy as hell and doesn’t sleep, meaning he will just drop unconscious out of nowhere.

Related (not really-) to the one about Mass’s cat, Mass is the only person that Loui’s Maine Coon, River, hasn’t growled or hissed at yet (besides Loui, cuz River loves that boy with her whole heart).

Loui communicates through weird-sounding chirps sometimes and Mass just thinks that it’s really cute and reminds him of NY.

Seemingly, Loui walking around with Mass is like having "scary dog privileges", even though the only actual threat there is Loui. But ain’t nobody gotta know that 🤫.

#welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #ben brainard #wttt #wttsh #wttt louisiana #wttt massachusetts #wttsh louisiana #wttsh massachusetts

[asteroidtroglodyte]

I saw a post about wanting a dog and running free but not being able to have that as a child and crying over seeing your own child running free with the dog. I saw it was made by you, reblogging your own post

And it resonated with me, so I went to like it. But then Tumblr wouldn't let me, there was something going wrong. So I thought oh well it's not that far down my following feed, I'll just restart the app and try again. And now it's gone, I scrolled until it wouldn't let me scroll anymore

I tried to look it up on your page, scrolling and searching. It's just gone

I just wanted to say that that post resonated deeply with me, in a way. And I know it might not quite have been the way it was intended to be taken but i could relate it somewhat to something quite personal for me

And I just wanted you to know that I would have liked that post, maybe even reblogged it, and it made me really feel things

What I mean is, thank you for that post

[I deleted the original, but I can remember it pretty well, so here’s a reiteration]

The experience of reading Where The Red Fern Grows as a child and feeling deeply about it; spending years wishing you could have a dog (that wasn’t supposed to sleep in the bed, but when mom isn’t looking you let them, and the two of you fall asleep curled up together, like littermates) and wanting to run wild and free with them through the woods, to pound the earth with your feet and fog the air with your breath as the two of you live the Ancient Kinship of Human and Dog;

But there are no woods to run through; the police will ticket you for even having a dog on a leash in most places; god forbid the two of you run wild and free; and besides your mom is alone so she’s always tired trying to raise you and doesn’t have the energy to raise a dog too so you never get one;

And the decades pass and you forget; first how much it ached, that Want; and then, gradually, eventually, finally, mercifully, you forget that you ever wanted it at all;

And one day you finally make it out of the city and you meet a woman and fall in love and she has a dog and it looks just like you always imagined you’d like for your dog to look and the dog falls in love with you as much as the woman does and the woman says things like she must really like you she never does this with anyone as the dog curls up next to you to sleep (like littermates)

And one day the woman gives you a Child and you have the surreal experience of meeting someone who laughs like you and cries like you and makes your faces back at you and you fall in love with this beautiful little Human and you teach him how to run and how to say “dog!”

And one day you’re in the woods with this little person who looks out at the world through eyes that are so eerily like yours and he’s running with your dog and they are wild and joyful and free in the Ancient Kinship of Dog and Human And

I Love you, little one.

I Love you so much.

I hope you never understand my tears

#troglodyte thoughts #free range sustainable shitpost #druid life #writing #animals #dog #child #parenting #healing the scars of a hard childhood #by giving my son a gentler one #I love you #little guy #where the red fern grows

[edandstede]

i’ve never understood this idea that once you live with your partner, it becomes a chore. that you hate being under the same roof. it’s most often pedalled by the cishets too, which i could go into their norms vs queer love and how we experience these things differently but i won’t. but yeah, what’s up with this accepted state of hating being in each other’s space? like, i understand the occasional argument or disagreement, needing to make time for yourself, having your own room, of course being inseparable isn’t healthy 24/7, but i could never hate living with the man i love. it couldn’t even cross my mind.

we’ve been together for almost 12 years, lived together for 3, and i’ll never be bored. i’ll never resent being in his space, getting to share a roof and a home. it isn’t difficult. i don’t struggle to accommodate him, because loving him isn’t a job or a task. it’s something i do every day the same way i eat and drink and breathe. just is. we watch telly together and share a running commentary on some things that make us snort, we play video games together, he randomly starts dancing with me in the kitchen to the radio. we sit and do our little separate crafts together. he laughs and talks in his sleep and i see how long i can keep getting him to answer me. we hand over meals or cups of tea with a love or sweetheart or darling and we have done for years and i know we always will. we have our little routines and jobs we each prefer and we work out compromises for things and we go on enjoying our lives together. he makes me fucking howl with laughter on a daily basis, and i do with him. we cuddle up with our dog at night in a pile of blankets. it’s so lovely. like it’s just so fucking cool to have him around all the time and never have to miss him for long.

why the fuck do some people think you have to accept that one day you’ll hate this experience? that’s not normal. like, this shit is the best thing ever, it’s so much fun, every day i get to just hang out with my best friend! that’s a privilege! what do you mean i only have to open my eyes and the person who brings me the most peace and comfort in the world is right there? mate that is magic. who gets to be that lucky?

who we are now and how we act with each other vs when we were dating and living separately, there are only minor differences. normal differences. it hasn’t changed our dynamic, if anything we are more content and in love and settled. that’s how it should be isn’t it? sharing a home, that added layer of security and assuredness, that you’re a team, a family. it should make things easier, not harder.

it’s just bizarre to me and i’ll never understand it. i can’t relate to this popular belief that couples become grumpy and complacent and bitter and resentful just because of proximity, and that it’s bound to happen - that it’s inevitable. literally no couple is perfect but god damn do you even love each other if coexisting makes you that miserable? because it shouldn’t. it’s the joy of my life to get to do this with him.

#this has been on my mind for months. needed to vent it out #of course i get that some circumstances make relationships suffer #of course i do. but generally speaking #you should never feel like you’re dooming yourself to be ‘tied down’ #the whole ball and chain thing needs to die #i’m having a blast actually #most fun i’ve ever had #quill to paper #personal

[kalicocoa]

An Announcement on the State of Night Rule

So I’ve been struggling with how to say these things and I finally just need to get it off my chest. I think I’ll feel better after finally speaking about things, so here we go!

After today, I will not be participating in the Project SEKAI fanbase outside of finishing my fanfiction, Night Rule!

I’ve had a lot of unsavory experiences with people in this fanbase that were behind closed doors in a way. (Discord Servers, Private Messages, etc.) Making a big stink out of things will only reflect poorly on me as past experience has proven to me, so I’d rather just let sleeping dogs lie and remove myself from the equation without making an enormous post about those things.

I don’t feel very safe when interacting with people anymore and more often than not I’m hurt by unnecessary hostile behavior toward me. Hostility that ranged from disagreeing on meaningless headcanons to straight up bigotry at my expense. (I quite literally watched as some passionate readers of my fic turned on me immediately upon learning I was a person of color. I don’t feel good about this and I never will either.)

However, Night Rule will be completed. I plan to finish it, even if my motivation is practically abysmal lately. I have love for my story and the completed outline I worked so hard on, but I do not feel well writing this story for people that ultimately think little of me as the creator.

That being said, updates will be extremely scarce from this point onward. Hopefully at least once a month, but I can’t promise this due to my current mental health state. You’re getting this fanfiction for free and it’s a work that has brought a lot of aggression toward me as a person, so you can be reasonable and accept that it will update as much as it will on my terms. Hope that’s understood, because if it isn’t, that’s something you’ll have to deal with on your own I’m afraid.

Night Rule was a creation of my own personal passion for Proseka and its cast, fit with my favorite fantasy tropes and ideas I had been dying to use in a story for years. For this reason, it’s much too special to me to abandon and I plan to keep this as a thing for me before I worry about how much people love or hate it.

I recommend that if you only follow me for Project SEKAI, you should probably unfollow me now! I will not be sharing posts of it anymore and the only things related to Proseka that will be posted will be updates on this fic and reblogged fanworks of Night Rule if people continue to make those. I’ll still be playing the game on occasion, but I will not be talking about it on here casually from here on out.

Where I plan to go from here, I’m not really sure. I still have things that I enjoy, so I plan to keep writing and reblogging things that I like. Maybe I’ll move on to the next big interest. Maybe I’ll disappear someday. Who knows. We’ll figure it out when we get there.

But the point remains, this chapter of my life is coming to a close, and the end of Night Rule will be the end of my involvement in this fanbase for good.

Thank you for understanding! See you on the flip side. (❁´◡`❁)

#Proseka Magical Hero AU #Calico Chats #I'm so relieved to get this all out #I'm just really tired and ready to move on #I've woken up daily thinking about how I can't bring myself to work on chapters atm and I feel so sick all the time #But no more. I'm moving on and taking as long as I need on this fic. #If this bums you out sorry? You can unfollow and block me whatever makes you feel good. But I'll be taking it easy from here. #Life is too complicated and much too short for me to be trapped in a cycle like this #I'm not even being paid HAHAHA I will quit for my own health. Thank you #Proseka #WonderShow #Leo/need #MMJ #VBS #N25 #Vocaloid

[gray-skiess]

🌙Hi!! Can I please have a Marvel and a Marauders romantic matchup?? (and forgive me if I make a mistake in the writing, I'm not fluent in english yet♡)

I'm pansexual and genderfluid, that uses all the pronouns.

I'm a brazilian, my house is Slytherin (but I have LOTS of Ravenclaw qualities), my sign is Leo and MBTI is INTJ. I have tan skin, dimples, brown eyes, straight black hair that goes below my waist and bangs. About my body, I think what stands out the most are the really thick thighs and the hands and feet that are really small. I wear glasses (I have astigmatism and myopia, my grade is VERY high); where i live is SO hot but i really like to wear sweats and pants so sometimes it's kind of hard but i think i wear any kind of clothes? I like to experiment with new styles and I really want to dye my hair but I didn't have the opportunity; I'm absolutely addicted to wearing necklaces, bracelets and especially rings, I'm always wearing several.

I have a quiet, observant, sarcastic and motherly personality, although from a distance it seems that I will be rude to you, I will actually be very calm and give you soft smiles. I can get stressed out easily but I don't show anything but glare, and above all I NEVER raise my voice, even in a fight the only thing I'm going to do is keep my voice calm with a firm, authoritative tone. I LOVE protecting and caring for people and listening to them talk about what they like, I always give them my FULLY attention. My love language is 100% touch, I am always touching the people I like and care about. Another thing is that I'm not a submissive person in a relationship, like NO, AT ALL, and i absolutely hate going into water, like, sea, pools, lake, I don't know how to swim and I panic.

I'm completely in love with all kinds of art, especially dancing (I'm ALWAYS dancing while listening to music, which is pretty much all day long) and drawing/painting (sometimes I end up doing a whole drawing and not even realize it). I love reading and I always have a book with me, physical or digital. I love animals, I have cats, dogs, parrots, turtles and cockatiels, and I would give my life for them all without a second thought. Oh, I also love anything horror related with passion and bake, most of the time I don't even eat, I just bake and give it to people because I love it when they say they like what I made.

hey lovely ! thank you so much for the request <3 i hope you enjoy ! also omg we can be blind besties- my prescription is awful too ;-;

from the mcu i match you with;

thor odinson !

underrated king !! i feel like y’all would balance each other out a lot <3

- he is your #1 supporter !!! like definitely cherishes anything you give him and if you bring him around your house he’s definitely trying to befriend all of your animals

- he’s an adventurer (obvi) so he’s always looking for something to do and because he still isn’t used to earth’s ways of life he’s always wanting to bring you with him. he doesn’t push you into anything you’re uncomfortable with but wants you to be a part of his life as much as you’re willing

- i don’t think he’d be the type to get comfortable with a good book- but he’d definitely keep you company while you do !

from the marauders i match you with;

sirius black !

ugh they’re so abhshsxhidhehd i love sirius ! and i feel like it fits (my justification for everything tbh) <3

- love language is absolutely touch and quality time. loves to sit by a fire with you in his arms just talking or reading or sleeping- anything really

- loves seeing you dance and listen to music- definitely tries to join in but they’re not quite as talented. tries anything you’re into- books, music, baking, art

- i don’t think sirius is a horror movie fan- definitely the type to have to hold a pillow over his face every time there’s a jump scare, but continues to watch them with you because you like them.

#gray-skiess #gray's blog #x reader #marauders #marvel #matchup #matchup request #mcu #sirius black #padfoot #thor #thor odinson #headcanons #moodboards

[inkystaar]

mafia :looksatyou:

hi merc we are going to pretend like this ask isn’t months old, okay?

me losing my mind under the cut

(ft. multiple crane wives songs)

little soldiers by tcw….. mafia…….. specifically braid duo….. but also angel duo…..

the “i swear that you loved me” is angel duo..

“we didn’t give up, we wouldn’t dare surrender, it was an honest loss!” is braid duo to me. like. ough. they’ve been through so much but they’re still going (as far as i know LOL)

i’ve also thought about little soldiers as gem and bowie which is just. ouughhh. “i swear that i loved you” <- that one scene on the rooftop where gem finds out bowie started the loops….. “beneath the table you would offer up my bones” is gem telling people about it, and “all the dogs would lick your fingers” is people then going after m!bowie… “now the aftermath will ring with songs you’ve sung, all our words sent home in boxes” THE AFTERMATH. OF GEM. TELLING ICARUS ABOUT WHAT BOWIE TOLD IT. OURHEHDHSHHDHSJSJSJDJDJ. THE AFTERMATH WILL RING WITH SONGS YOUVE SUNG…..

SPEAKING OF M!BOWIE AND M!GEM…. canary in a coal mine is THEM. “am i the only thing that keeps you safe when the light is gone?” <- them. somehow. i know it’s them. i just KSJJDJDND i can’t figure it out COMPLETELY. hhhhhhhhhh

“but i still hold out hope that maybe someday ill be worth more than all the silence left in my way” <- m!gem. no i will not be taking questions. goodbye.

also!! metaphor is so m!merc and m!bowie to me. i love m!merc and m!bowie so much they should be allowed to blow shit up. specifically m!merc should be given explosives.

okay no one is going to understand this because i never shared what i wrote for m!bowie’s ending (i will…. at some point maybe……) but sleeping giants is m!bowie and xer relationship to the loops…..

the personification of the nature is just. it’s the timeloop to me. it’s the loops. that dimension, every part of it, so so so fucking alive….. “the trees are crowing hungry, hungry harmonies” RAHHHG

“my pulse is clear, rushing in my ears, i hear something calling me” 🫵 m!bowie’s ending btw. btw. if you care. also. the pulse thing relates even though m!bowie doesn’t have a pulse!!!! right as their… not really?? dying??? but i guess they’re dying. they’re being reborn into like. a different life. and that’s the one time during the loops that they actually have a pulse, hence the “my pulse is clear”

hollow moon by tcw is unexplainable but for sure a mafia song….

the glacier house is revengers to me?? “i saw your eyes so sweet go cold” is such a m!iced lyric to me? “bundle up darling, you’re on your own now” is literally that one time iced told jordan they were using her. or something. (i forgot exactly what happened. (i read that rp very late at night))

“you sought to hold yourself in, wait out the weather” <- also m!iced. to me. what the fuck is their problem /pos

#*iskall voice* omega incomprehensible character thoughts of doom #me when i am not caught up on lore but still brainrotting about mafia #mafiablr #inky speaks #mafia on my mind #i probably have more to say about tcw and mafia but hey. i gotta go to work.

[c-rose2081]

Starchild || 11. Heaviness

(Disney Z-O-M-B-I-E-S)

—

—

-

Zed felt heavy and worn down.

His body was aching more than usual, and his head felt as though it was ready to split in two and spill his brains out. Morning practices were the worst. Not only was it cold, but there was dew still on the field meaning the smell of mud was now plastered inside his nose. The night had been sleepless; mostly just worried thinking about anything and everything that wasn’t related to sleeping.

He thought about his mom; how much he missed her. He thought about Zoey, not having the female role model in her life that she really needed now that she was getting older. He thought about dad, and how hard he worked for so little, but also about how he had to continue on without the love of his life. And — naturally — Zed thought about A-ddison. Because when wasn’t he thinking about her? She was everything he wasn’t. Clean, smart, beautiful, and so sweet it made his heart yearn for her attention. He was just a cranky Zombie kid with nothing but football in his future.

Not only had A-ddison fallen from the sky perfect, but she was an expert at blending in. She was already far more adapted to human life than Zed had been back when Zombies were first invited to Seabrook High. She was a Cheereader now, and the lost daughter of the Mayor. The MAYOR. One of the most important people in their town (who also happened to be part alien. Surprise!). Suddenly, Zed felt very self-conscious about himself. Not just about his clothes, either, but about his attitude in general. He wasn’t social, or really all that great at making friends. He had Eliza and Bonzo who he’d known forever, but no one else had really earned his full trust since then.

Sure he was popular, but he never asked for that. He didn’t want to be liked just because he could throw a ball and knock people over. It was an awfully brutish way to get attention, now that he thought about it. A-ddison was a natural at meeting new people — there was just something buzzing around her that made people enjoy her presence. Zed wasn’t sure what it was, but he felt addicted to its draw. The loss he felt at Addy leaving with Mayor Wells the night before to spend some time together was immense. Probably another reason why he felt like his ribs had been packed full of sand, and sawdust was coming out his ears.

“���well, you look like you just crawled out of a grave.”

Zed groaned in annoyance, lifting his head to sneer at the werewolf now standing before him.

“I’m trying to tan, dog. You’re blocking my sunlight.”

“That’s funny for a dead guy,”

“Undead guy,” Zed corrected, “if we were actually dead, you’d lose your lunch. What do you want, Wyatt?”

“Hm,” Wyatt huffed, strolling to the outside table which Zed had settled at the minute practice ended, “a little birdie told me you’ve got a new girlfriend.”

“It’s not exactly a secret,” Zed scoffed, frowning as Wyatt rested one knee up on the bench directly across from him, “pretty sure all of Seabrook knows by now.”

“Maybe. But a dogs nose knows, ya know?” Wyatt insisted, tapping the end of his nose with a finger.

“No. I feel like I’m dying; I really don’t have the patience for riddles, fleabag.”

“You’re keeping secrets, that’s what,” Wyatt growled, “the pack doesn’t like secrets.”

“What I do isn’t any of the pack’s business,” Zed snarked back, “why do you care about my relationship status, anyway? Jealous I’m taken?”

“As if,”

“Sure doesn’t sound that way.”

“I’m saying, zom-boy, that if you keeping secrets threatens our Moonstone? I’ll be sure that you really are dead meat walking, capisce?”

“Where exactly is this coming from?” Zed wondered in genuine confusion, lifting a notched brow, “you don’t even know who I’m dating, do you? Just that I am.”

“Maybe. But you’re always meddling in things you shouldn’t be,” Wyatt explained, “so I’m giving you a warning. You know, from guy to guy?”

“Right,” Zed rolled his eyes, “cause this interaction has been purely good will.”

Wyatt growled in annoyance, but turned to look at something across the quad.

“Well, well. What do we have here?” he mused, causing Zed to turn and look in that direction as well. A-ddison was getting out of a fancy blue car, practically glowing in the morning light and reflecting the sun with her brightness and apparent love of pastel pink.

Zed didn’t think A-ddison could shake him any more than she already did, but today she was positively beaming, bright blue eyes glistening, and pale blond curls kept behind her ears by the cheer bow in her hair. Mayor Wells exited the car as well. She handed a box of something to A-ddison before kissing her on the crown of the head, cradling her face in both hands. As newly reunited mother and daughter separated, it didn’t take A-ddison more than a second to spot Zed (who made sure he was as close to the front of the school as possible).

“Zed!” She greeted happily, quickening her pace to meet him, “hi!”

“Morning Addy,” he smiled at her, rising from his bench with a small grunt of pain, “you look nice today.”

“Thank you! Mom and I stopped to get a new dress before school; she says it takes up less energy to have something called a wardrobe, so I don’t have to change so much.”

“Right,” Zed agreed, moving to slip both hands into his pockets only to have A-ddison saddle up easily into his side. The only place he could put his arm was around her, which was more than comfortable, if not way more intimate than yesterday.

“Is this a friend of yours?” Addy wondered, finally spotting Wyatt who was staring very intently at her. Zed didn’t like how focused his wolf eyes were, like he was sizing up a rabbit or deer to chase.

“This is Wyatt, he’s a Werewolf.”

“Werewolf. That’s right, you told me about them,” A-ddison mused faintly, tilting her head, “it’s nice to meet you, Wyatt. I’m Addison.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Wyatt drawled, showing off his fangs, “welcome to Seabrook.”

A-ddison smiled back, glancing up to look at Zed as she opened the tupperware given to her by Mayor Wells.

“Mom and I made these last night. She said Grandma was really good at them.”

“Cookies!” Zed laughed, reaching into the box to pick up a baked disk and observing it, “did you sleep at all? You’re practically buzzing.”

“Not really. We fell asleep watching something called a movie? It’s on the…screen-thing,” Addy insisted, forgetting the word for television and causing Zed to laugh as he took a bite of the cookie and moaned.

“Addy, oh my god, these are so good.”

“Mom did most of the work,” A-ddison chuckled, lifting a hand to show off the bandages across her fingers, “I just burned myself on the cookie sheets. Wyatt, do you want one?”

“Don’t mind if I do,” the wolf said, reaching into the bin with his claws, “you made em?”

“I’ve never made cookies before,” Addy told him, bouncing on her heels with a gleam in her eye, “it was so much fun.”

“We should probably head in. You still need to get your schedule,” Zed remembered, glancing at his z-band which told the time, “we have a bit of time before first period.”

“Alright. Will I see you inside, Wyatt?”

Zed frowned at the question, but smiled triumphantly as the wolf shook his head, seemingly downcast as he looked at his cookie, flipping it between his claws.

“Nah. We wolves just like to hang around out back; keeps things interesting. You need something, drop my name.”

“I will,” Addy nodded, “bye Wyatt.”

“Wolf.” Zed mumbled flatly as Wyatt smirked at him and gave a small salute.

“Dead guy.”

And off he went, vanishing quickly into the trees nearby as A-ddison blinked and shook her head.

“You don’t seem very much like the traditional definition of friends,” she admitted, “was I incorrect in my assumption?”

“It’s…eh, complicated,” Zed shrugged, beginning to walk with A-ddison back towards school, “we aren’t really friends. I guess you could say it’s more like unwilling acquaintances.”

“I see,” Addy mused hesitantly, not saying much else on the subject. She was either mulling it over in her mind in order to decipher what that meant, or simply didn’t have much else to include. For a while it was just a comfortable silence between two friends. Zed liked having A-ddison beside him again, and he stole another cookie to munch on while they wandered along. But eventually he spoke up, needing to figure something out before reaching Principle Lee’s office.

“Uh, A-ddison, I have a question.”

“Yes?”

She looked up at him with those baby blues and nearly sent him to the floor. Why was she so freaking blinding? It made it so hard to focus on anything but her, “Zed?”

“Huh?”

“You had a question?”

“Yes, sorry. Yesterday, you called me…babe, and kissed me. And I was just kinda wondering where that came from?”

A-ddison paused her walk, furrowing her brows up into her hairline.

“Yes. Is…that not what a girlfriend is supposed to do?”

“Well I mean it is, b-but we…I just…”

“Zed, I know being involved is part of the plan and is not a permanent fixture in our friendship. However, Zoey informed me that in order for it to be very believable, nouns of endearment and physical affection via the lips should be exchanged frequently.”

Pet names and kissing. Right. Typical boyfriend and girlfriend behavior.

“What does Zoey know about that?” Zed grumbled, “she’s twelve.”

“She seemed very knowledgeable to me, and I thought I’d try her advice. It worked well, don’t you think?”

“Yeah,” Zed agreed with a sigh, “really well.”

A little too well actually, because now all Zed wanted to do was kiss her back. He was curious what her delicate pink lips tasted like…he knew she borrowed some cherry, glitter lip-gloss from Bree the day before.

“Zed?”

“Wha?” He shook out of the intrusive thoughts, “sorry.”

“You seem awfully distracted,” A-ddison observed, intertwining her fingers with his and squeezing gently, “are you alright?”

“F-fine…totally…”

Zed stared into his Alien friends face, getting lost quickly in her eyes. They were deep and sparkling, as though she had trapped the whole universe of stars inside them. Cautiously, he leaned in a bit. She smelled really nice today; something sweet, like the cookies held in her arms. They were so close, noses were almost touching. She wasn’t pulling away from him…could he…?

“Ahem?”

Both teens jumped away from one another. A-ddison ducked her head, and Zed nearly fell into the wall as Principle Lee stared at them intently.

“H-ey, Big Lee,” Zed greeted her with a small salute, trying to stay casual while his palms were getting slimy from embarrassment, “we were just coming to see you.”

“Uh-huh? I can see that,” the woman drawled, seeming a bit amused if nothing else, “awfully brave to study one another directly outside my office? Most students do that in more private environments.”

“We were just talking,” Zed mumbled, shoving both hands into his pockets, “you know…about stuff?”

“Yes, well. A word to the wise, ‘stuff’ should probably be discussed out of the view of your Principle, hm?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. Now, Addison,” Principle Lee turned to the girl, who glanced up at her sheepishly, “I was informed of your…unique…circumstances by the Mayor. It will be kept confidential until you decide you want to share it with others. Though I must warn you that talk travels very quickly in this town.”

“I understand, ma’am.”

“Very well. We have a few more things which need to be discussed in private, so if you’ll please come with me?“

“Of course,” Addy agreed, “Zed?”

“We’ll meet up for lunch,” he told her, seeing the wariness caught in her eyes, “same spot as this morning, kay?”

“Ok. I’ll see you later.”

Zed smiled, once again caught off guard as A-ddison grabbed him by the collar and pulled him down to her level. It was just a cheek peck this time — she probably felt he was uncomfortable with the lip kissing after their conversation — but it still sent fireworks through his stale blood. He immediately reached to cup the area with his palm, watching her follow Principle Lee back into her office. The last view he had was the bow in her hair, the bounce of her turquoise curls, and the swish of her skirt. He stood there for a while, jaw slackened as he fell to rest against the nearest wall of lockers.

What in zombies name was she doing to him?

Zed spent plenty of times around girls. They tended to flock around him, after his popularity and status. They did nothing but make him squirm. A-ddison was nothing like that. She was magnetic…addictive. Having her next to him was like holding onto a charged battery. It electrified him, completely and totally. All of the exhaustion from morning practice was gone. The pain, the ache, the feeling of slowly being crushed under the weight of the world. Gone. A single glance from those sapphire irises made him feel like a new zombie.

Glancing down at his wrist, the black veins had faded. They were faint now against his pallor, unlike just after practice where they were bulging, painful, and rashy. It was the second time such a thing had happened, he realized internally. Addy touched him, and his pain went away. He also dropped down to the IQ of a trash can, and had the eloquence of a beached seal during these moments. But the pain was gone, like she had simply pulled it off him like a sheet and took it with her.

Sighing heavily, Zed flopped to the floor. He banged the back of his head against the lockers a few times, cursing himself.

He didn’t think being ‘just friends’ was working out very well.

-

Tag List:

@theredrenard

@disneyfan50

@rose-sparks13

@magical-ashley

@kokinu09

@octolingo-writes

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@zeddisonss

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#disney zombies #starchild au #alternate universe #zed necrodopolis #addison wells #zeddison #wyatt lykensen #z o m b i e s #z o m b i e s 2 #z o m b i e s 3 #fanfiction #disney fanfiction #writing #dcom #soft af

[velvettes-lil-fawn]

I wrote this a while ago, while not Kpop or SWF2 related I figured I would post up a writing anyway.

Emotional support Pokémon

Piers

Would throw everyone off and have a Fairy type or something

Probably a Sylveon caught as an Eevee by Marnie

It evolved into Sylveon at night while he was trying to get an Umbreon to stick with his dark types

Marnie caught the Eevee and had it trained as a thanks for her Morpeko which he caught for her when she was younger

Rika

Let's be honest she has more Woopers

Not just Paldean but Johto as well

Grusha Probably got one of the Johto Woopers for Rika so she let's it sit by her desk when she is interviewing Elite 4 challengers

Grusha

Has a fire type which throws everyone off

It was caught by Rika as a thanks for the Johto Wooper

Rika caught him a Vulpix and he cuddles with it at night

He plays with it when he isn’t busy with any gym challengers during the day and his Ice types are sleeping

It knows he loves it and it loves him a lot

He lets it sit and watch when he has to battle gym challengers

Leon

Let's be honest he is part of the reason Emotional support Pokémon exist

That man has been through so much as his time as champion

His Charizard still battles but he trained it to be his Emotional support when Raihan and Piers aren't around

People aren’t really surprised his Charizard is his Support Pokemon

Raihan

Piers gave him a Galar Zigzagoon and he absolutely spoils it

He's trained it to bite ankles of people who make him angry

"He won't bite"

as it's chewing gently on Raihans arm while he speaks

Marnie

Her Morpeko is her emotional support as well as her best fighter

She wouldn't stop bugging Leon to train Morpeko for it

“He may be my best partner in battle but still, train ‘im fer me please” constantly

Leon eventually gave in and did it as well as trained the Eevee (now Sylveon which he finds kind of funny) for Piers

Allister

Says his ghost pokemon are enough

Is lying though

Secretly has a Espeon thanks to Nessa giving him an Eevee after she got it trained to be an emotional support pokemon by Sonia

He loved the Eevee and had such a good friendship it evolved in the daytime to an Espeon

He immediately showed Nessa and Sonia that it evolved

He cuddles with the Espeon at night when he had a rough day

Hop

Leon got him yet another Wooloo as a surprise

Did not expect it at all and started crying (of happiness)

He gave up his bed so the Wooloo would be comfortable at night

That Wooloo never leaves his side and has witnessed him lose so many battles at this point

Sonia

Both Nessa and Leon secretly got together and trained another Yamper for her

Walked into the lab and thought the other one was a wild one that wondered in

Nessa had to stop her and explain before she hurt it on accident

She was grateful and hugged both Leon and Nessa as tight as possible when she was done playing with both the Yampers

Both Yampers are spoiled as fuck

It was her idea for the Emotional Support pokemon and she brought it up to Leon who agreed on it

Atticus

He got a Piplup as gift from Penny

When he told people who got it for him they were shocked

His team was a bit skeptical of the penguin at first but they eventually warmed up to it

He designed a vest for it so people don’t tell him to send it out if they battle him

“This Piplup is a mere baby. I shall not let it get harmed in anyway”

He carries it around on his shoulder everywhere he goes

Pepper

He has a Fidough as an emotional support Pokemon

It sits in his dorm mostly

He cuddles up with it and his Mabosstiff at night

Mabosstiff was skeptical of the other dog Pokemon being brought around and still is

Pepper has to keep Mabosstiff from attacking the smaller dog Pokemon 90% of the time.

#masked writings #pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #pokemon sword and shield

[unusual-raccoon]

Here's a modern!JaceLuke idea i had while waiting for sleeping pills to take effect(it has been like two hours and nothing is happening so who knows).

So Jace and Baela are best friends and step siblings/cousins(since this is modern times Rhaenyra and Laenor did artificial insemination so trueborn Velaryon boys, yay🤗) who everyone thinks are dating. When in fact both are very much in love with their younger siblings, Luke and Rhaena. Both Jace and Baela are very pretty, very popular, and very scary(i headcanon that Jace and Baela are Daemon's favorite kids whom he knows can take care of themselves and don't need him to fight their battles, meanwhile he believes Luke and Rhaena need protection 24/7 even those are more likely to commit and get away with murder) so people are wary of asking the younger Targaryen/Velaryon sibling duo out on dates.

I would add more but i ran out of mental energy so this is as much as i can come up with at the moment.

Putting my clown 🤡 wig on because I genuinely thought I replied to this??? Sorry for the delay.

This isn’t a criticism, but I imagine Jace, Luke, Baela and Rhaena would still be related and likely just as close even if Harwin was their bio dad, Rhaenyra and Laena are still cousins! Sorry, I just love Rhaenyra’s boys to have all their dads, modern!AUs are the perfect “everyone lives” opportunity in my opinion.

Anywho, I am absolutely in love with the idea of Jace and Baela lowkey being each other’s beard???

Everyone thinks they’re dating meanwhile they’re messing around with their siblings? Brilliant.

Modern!AUs are so deeply attached to High School!AUs for me, particularly because the characters are of age. Captain of the football team and head cheerleader Jacela being the IT couple, with their shy, artsy younger siblings who follow them around like stray dogs.

My brain is going in a thousand different directions with this ask, mostly with Luke and Rhaena getting slutted out by their older siblings?? (I can’t help it, sorry).

Bonus points if Jacela knows what the other is up to, but Luke and Rhaena have no clue? Like they’re in the exact situation as their best friend, quietly pining after a hot older sibling.

#answered asks #anon <3 #jaceluke #jaceluke agenda #jacaerys x lucerys #Baela x Rhaena #hotd

[jjtheresidentbaby]

whenever a case is especially difficult, hotch insists on Emily and jj sleeping with him in his hotel room when the team rests for the night, regardless of whether or not the case is solved. it just makes him feel better knowing his partner and their little one are safe with him where he can see and protect them.

And even though these nights result in jj barely sleeping throughout the night from nightmares and waking up every other hour whimpering for one of them until they rock her back to sleep, or Emily not sleeping at all from her insomnia and trauma, at least he’s not alone. sure none of them get much sleep but at least they have each other. bc aaron hotchner may not be able to protect and save everyone but he’ll be damned if he lets anything hurts his team, especially Emily and jj -⚽️

Nightmares | Caregiver Hotchniss x Little Jj

find on ao3 here

a/n: I am sobbing about this whole thing, god I love them and protective Hotch hits my heart. also a total hc of mine that Jj’s scared of dogs after what happened to her

warnings: nightmares, crying, angst, case related talk, Emily being referred to as ‘mama’ & Hotch as ‘dada’, mentions of the dogs from season 2 final episodes

───°˖✧✿✧˖° ───

-

“Jj, sweetheart you have to get up.” Hotch pleads, shaking the girls arm, not the first time in the night he’s woken up to the sleep talking of Jj begging for help.

Crying for Aaron and Emily, thrashing in her sleep, breathing becoming ragged, and absolutely destroying the caregivers every time. Each time seems to get progressively worse as the night goes on. Which isn’t abnormal for the blonde girl, she’s always had bad nightmares since her sister died, but the recent events of the case that just got solved really seem to bother her sleeping patterns.

“Jj, honey wake up.” Emily chimes in, her worry overflowing in her chest when Jj’s hands try to grasp at the blankets wrapped around herself for comfort. Small pleads of ‘dada, help, mama, em, help me, I don’t want to’ that fall mumbled from Jj’s lips.

“No- no- Dada!” A sob echos through the quiet room when Jj awakes with a gasp, her arms getting thrown over Aaron’s shoulders in an instant, head stuffing against his neck and tears flooding down her cheeks.

“Okay, okay, Shh, I’m right here baby. Right here.” Aaron shushes in seconds, wrapping his little girl up tightly in his arms, trying to press every ounce of comfort he can into the embrace. Emily rests a hand on the back of Jj’s shoulder, sharing a concerned look with Hotch while the blonde cries louder.

“It- it was so bad, couldn’t get out- and- and the dogs and-!” It’s broken up between sobs, Jj stopping whatever she thought was trying to convey to instead start crying against Hotch, her hands bawling up fists of his sleep shirt and arms tightening over his shoulders.

“I know baby girl, I know honey. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there, I’m so sorry.” Aaron’s stomach turns uncomfortably thinking about the night they found Jj in that barn with those dogs shot down and a poor girls remains.

Him and Prentiss both shiver at the memory. Emily being able to pinpoint just how terrified Jj was, her whole body on edge that didn’t truly die down til they all went home, it was gut wrenching watching Jj try to conceal how much that night affected her.

But both caregivers have come to know just how difficult it is for Jj to even be around a dog afterwards, clinging onto Hotch or Emily the whole time, no matter the breed or how kind the dog might be.

Then the recent case where she was cornered with a rather large looking dog, it wasn’t aggressive but it was loud, barking at Jj from its place tied in the yard while the girl stood frozen in fear til Hotch had found her. The case couldn’t have finished any quicker after that, for all three of them, Emily and Hotch not letting Jj be more than three feet from them, and Jennifer desperately keeping herself from slipping into her little space for comfort.

Something Aaron can tell has happened now, he slowly starts to rock them both atop the bed, trying to soothe the feeling of anxiety he knows sits in Jj’s chest. It works the way it does every time and Hotch blesses that Jj’s tears turn to sniffles quickly.

“That’s it baby, just breathe.” Emily shuffles closer to the pair on the bed, leaning against the shoulder Jj’s head doesn’t take up, pressing a kiss to Hotchs forehead softly then to Jj’s arm.

“Don’t wanna see the dogs again, don’t wanna think about it.” Jj mumbles into Hotchs damp skin, her voice is quiet, still shaky from the anxiety filled state that she woke up in.

“You don’t have to, we don’t have to see the dogs again.”

While Hotch assures this, he knows there will be point where Jj faces another dog, also that the nightmares and flashbacks from the night in the barn won’t go away either, he can only press a kiss into Jj’s hairline and hope him and Prentiss are there to help her through it.

Jj’s always been resilient to things that hurt her, never letting peoples words or actions affect her outside the normal pauses reaction, but this seems to be sticking. Aaron doesn’t know what else to do to try and help, Emily has to be at the same loss since she leans farther into Hotchs shoulder, murmuring something small enough to Jj that only she’s able to hear it. Tonight’s not alright, far from it, but it won’t stay like this, Aaron has to remind himself of that fact as he holds both his girls close.

#jj writes #criminal minds agere #little!jj #caregiver!hotch #caregiver!emily #jj x emily x hotch #jennifer jareau #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #⚽️ anon

[scarsmood]

clinical lycanthropy

Content warning: abuse, violence, symptoms of delusions and trauma

I wanted to document my experience with clinical lycanthropy so people may understand exactly what it encompasses for me as an individual. My experience is going to vary from others but typically i think people are under the impression you mental shift or experience transformation on a non physical level.

Since I can’t afford therapy (we love america) it has come back since mine is based in trauma. Without trauma therapy it has come back.

Here’s what I experience:

Pseudoseizures- often to me feel like left over energy from trying and failing to shift. I get those twice a day now.

Nervous system overstimulation- my highly sensitive nerves are more raw and on end than usual because of the stress from shifting every night and turning into an animal

Emotional ups and downs- my emotions are more animalistic and raw. You cry some days you snarl at people. Its very hard for me to control my emotions and impulsivity since im tired and have the urge to turn into an animal that can’t perceive consequences

No more late nights- my clock for friends stops at 9pm now. Typically i used to stay out till 2-3am but now I have to be in a designated safe space by 9pm. I have 2 hours from when i first feel the urge to shift starts. That gives me time to either drive home or improvise and find somewhere safe for me to sleep.

Shifts- painful and disorienting. My m-shifted mind has its own set of values and associations to objects. I notice routine is the most benefit and anything related to my bed or my own smell is comforting since it means i was there before. My personality definitely anxious wolf type behavior. I’ve growled at walls because shadows make them look slightly different

Diet changes- I’ll eat more (ig that helps the developing eating disorder lol) i now crave blood and organ meat often and a lot, along with beef or goat. Though sometimes i just want water filled vegtables.

Exhaustion- staying up till 3am every night cause your a scared dog pacing its enclosure is not fun on your body. I am in pain often and tired more so.

Friend averse- I don’t wanna make friends. I don’t want to talk to people. I often want to cut any ties i can. This is due to the stickied add on to this delusion that a werewolf is a monster and it’s better people don’t interact with those. Touching and hugging takes much more of my tolerance now and i wouldnt be suprised if i snarled at someone now instead of just being polite

Sadism- hunting and killing animals at night is what my brain wants to do every night now. Issue being. Everything is an animal. It typically triggers when im starving and never ate that day. Some days i just want to eat anything i can. Including people. I do remember that i can recognize faces to some degree but its more like flipping a coin and not a garenteed thing.

Strained muscles- my werewolf self loves over excerting itself and doing stupid things. Sometimes seizures or particularly active nights i wake up with strained muscles.

Inability to understand human society- as this continues the passive inflection to understand how humans and human culture works will slowly leave me. Until i feel completely alien and rejected from society. This often turns to anger and anxiousness. Which can trigger day time shifts.

Inability to read, write and understand language- as time progresses i may slowly loose these abilities. During shifts I completely loose them until I wake up the next morning. I can learn commands similar to other animals but i cannot understand english if that makes sense.

Red eyes- I’m not at this point (yet) but as my delusion gets stronger it’ll come back. Red eyes is a trigger state while I’m m-shifted that is 100% rage. This is how I’ve attempted to attack and kill my previous partner due to abuse. Red eyes is fun that it isn’t an if but a when. Each shift that doesn’t trigger a red eyes moment adds onto the pressure to trigger a red eyes shift. Similiar to setting a bear trap each m-shift is another additional weight against the spring until it sets off. This in particular is why I stopped having irl friends before trauma treatment. As i am simply straight up dangerous to be around. Not even a muzzle is gonna fix that shit.

Chaotic mindset- my mental alignment typically shifts from content and chill to aggitated asshole. I may start passively picking fights or in general be harder to be around because i am just abrasive. This typically is most apparent with places like jobs or with strangers. I seem to usually be ok with friends.

I just like this song rn have it as a gift

In short? Being an actual werewolf is stressful. My suicide risk probably went up 70% if this keeps up. Because living in constant pain, fear and anxiety of a world you do not understand that is working against you is extremely stressful.

Would I ever recommend someone to try werewolf’ing? No

#delusion #clinical lycanthropy #otherkin #therian #endel #Spotify