okay i’m being a lil hyper today and i CANNOT get the idea of an island empress reader having Luffy wrapped around her finger, plus the island itself UGH i’ve already though of it all guys. pls encourage me to talk more cause i have a 4 page goodbye doc for this fucking reader.
kay so basically my entire thought is empress reader on a very distant yet powerful island, like she’s friends with everyone and her island has a neutrality agreement bc of this, meaning marines and pirates have to be chill and natural around each other or smth
anyways- some day the Strawhats are just sailing around when Nami starts freaking tf out abt ‘THIS FUCKING ISLAND I FUCKING FOUND HER YES FUCK’ and literally screaming to find their big ass transponder snail meanwhile everyone else is just shocked she’s genuinely tweaking
come to find out Nami n her family (might be agaisnt cannon but fuck off) we’re regulars of reader’s island back when they were both lil girls and they bonded so hard that they still write each other and Nami has slowly been nudging the crew to get closer n closer to her island just so she can geek out with her childhood bestie
so they all are like ‘lmao okay that’s chill’ and park it and Nami just takes off. i’m talkin they turn around and she’s bolting toward the massive ass golden castle or smth, and they just kinda chill while the islanders greet them and start slowly (normally) taking them to the castle. they’re like weirdly neutral abt Nami screaming like a banshee, mainly cause the older islanders remember her and know it’s a lot for her
so they literally barely make it to the first step of the entrance before two shrill screams ring out and Nami comes out dragging this gorgeous, young ass empress out, covered head to toe in jewels and charms, even her hair is filled with crystals tied to her braids and spirals of gold and silver are strategically placed everywhere. she’s got obviously tribal tattoos and symbols decorating her entire body, her thick form’s dressed in the more beautiful silk robes and she’s got the brightest smile as she openly sobs int Nami’s arms
and Luffy, for the first time in his life, is completely shellshocked from her, just like ‘:0’ and STARING at the empress while she tries to compose herself
Obviously she’s aware of who they are, shooting them all pleasantries and looking down at Luffy (mf is like 5’6 im sorry i’m 5’11 I LOVE SHORT LUFFYSS KAKDKSKQ) and giving him just the sweetest smile and soft lil ‘hello Captain’ and oh god he’s literally shaking his hands are sweaty what-
then Usopp’s just like ‘HAH srry he’s never seen such a pretty lady before’ and they’re all giggling at his absolutely stary-eyed face as he’s just dead silent, heart racing in front of this goddess.
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is there a reason as to why jers really did NOT like being called sweetheart?
okay, hmmm.
i think it's because he finds it...Condescending?
honey, sweetheart, angel, baby...
they're all terms of endearment, but jersey only does infearment, ergo: getting cutesy-woosty, fuzzy-wuzzy lil pet names from people, specifically adults, make him feel like you are likening him to a weak, helpless domesticated animal that's meant to submit to you, infantilizing/inferiorizing him the way you would petulant child or a blubbering baby, that you're praising him but secretly patronizing him...that you're basically belittling and looking down on him.
...when in reality, you're literally just trying to be Nice.
jersey played basketball all through high school, so he knows ALL about offense and defense, or rather:
being offensive and defensive.
like, at the grocery store, if the old checkout lady is like "do you want a bag for that, honey?" <3 kyle is like She Thinks I'm Not Strong Enough To Carry My Groceries ( aka apartment groceries that kyle is not even going to eat anyways, rip jersey's ed ) and will carry 7 huge bags to the car, huffing and puffing, cussing her out.
tldr: no matter how many times you fill the glass, jersey kyle's is always half full -- when it's not Empty -- which it usually is because again, jersey doesn't drink anything but water or red wine. he covets cynicism, thinks everyone is secretly out to get him/preying on his downfall and that no good deed goes unpunished.
more than that...jersey’s never had a Reason to be soft.
he's a machine. he doesn't know what to do with his fingers when they aren't curled around a pencil or fashioned into a fist. he doesn't think he was made to do soft things. sentimental things. to him, being gentle & loving were meant for kind people. the kind of people,
...who can love things.
and jersey does not think he can love things.
again, it's part of the jersey can't say i love you ask meme, that i think i'm just going to slowly distribute through these other ask meme answers, but i am of the belief that sixth grade pre!rm jersey either told stan he loved him and then stan died the next day or that jersey kyle was abt to tell stan he loved him and then he died...
either way...i think that traumatized the Fuck out of him.
so he was, one, never told i love you by his father...ever, doesn't think that he's meant to love things because he's a unfeeling cyborg whose only purpose in life is to Succeed, love makes you vulnerable which makes you weak which disgusts him. but mainly: he'd stopped believing in love full stop after he lost his stanley marsh...
...but now his stanely marsh is back.
and kyle's whole world is in color again.
once jerseykyle and ravenstan start dating, and even, i think, during the period of time when kyle thinks he has a crush on raven of c.d., finds that his heart, which was hard for so long...is softening. he had no reason to be kind or gentle, but now...wants to be soft and gentle.
for stan.
( he is very touch tank by quinnie coded )
like kyle doesn't care about other people or how they're handled or mishandled, but if stan even frowns, kyle is like cracking his knuckles and looking around before checking on him in the cute gentle ky vc.
someone asked me if kyle's ptsd goes after after he gets stan back, and yes...and no. it gets better, tbh i think taking the clozapine actually made his psychosis worse so when he got off that things were better, but getting stan back unlocked a new fear which is...
that constantly in danger of losing stan again.
so sometimes in the middle of the night if stan gets up to get a glass of water or pick up more cat food for curb, if kyle wakes up and sees stan not there, it'll trigger like a full blown panic attack where he's like "ohgodohgodohgod!! none of this was Real i just fucking hallucinated stan, this whole thing was a lie, stan is gone, stan is dead!! sTAN???"
and thinks he imagined the whole thing/stan is GONE again, start like yelling his name, freaking the fuck out, totally breaking down and stan just comes out of the kitchen w/ his glass and then immediately drops it and runs over like "ky, did you think i was gone again? :(" like putting a blanket over him and holding his face and giving him one million thousand kisses like "shhshhshh it's okay, calmate, cariño. </3 i’m here. i'm not going anywhere. you're safe. go back to sleep...
I Would Never Leave You."
wHICH! V SICK N TWISTED THAT STAN LEFT!! DURING THE RAVESEY DIVORCE!!! KYLES ONE TRUE FEAR!!!!!!
KILL ME
but we are not going to be miserable this ask meme!
we are going to be lovely and kind because that's how kyle is when him and stan start dating like...WHEN I TELL YOU NO ONE HAS LOVED ANYONE MORE THAN JERSEY LOVES RAVEN!!!!!
like nobody! No! ONE! NO!!!! ONE!!!!
like idc idc idc if he can't say i love you, he has trauma, and the literal trauma of losing stan is a large reason why he can't say it, but also the reason why kyle is so Attached to stan when they're dating is bc when kyle thought stan was dead he thought that he was gone forever...so now he's committed to spend every second with stan like it's his last and spend his life loving him.
ugh, i just...kyle would do ANYTHING for stan.
like he's so sweet and soft in a way he isn't with Anyone.
when stan was getting sober from alcohol and he was throwing up nonstop, fucking crying and dying with his matted hair sticking to his forehead from how much he was sweating/how feverish he was, literally shaking, so fucking miserable w/ his face pressed into the toilet seat like "kyle, i can't fucking do this. i'm not strong enough. i feel like i'm going to die. i can't i can't i CANT." :((( kyle was just like gently gliding his thumb over stan's cheek like "you can do this. you survived so much more than this. i know it hurts now, but i'm here. and i will be with you every step of the way." and kisses his forehead.
and when i tell you kyle's fear of contamination and his intense ocd has him washing his hands and spraying you with bear mace if you even breathe near him, it doesn't matter when it's stan. like he loves and cares about stan so much that he does not give a shit what happens to him or weird fluids or being sick and i'm...AAAAAAAA!
or like omg, speaking of stan getting sober, those first couple of concerts after stan stops drinking and has to do raven things or preform in front of thousands of people, he used to do shots and have to drink a lot to be comfortable out there, so he has huge panic attacks sober. and kyle just reassures him from off stage and squeezes his hand, blows a kiss & sticks his tongue out.
FR EVEN HANGING OUT WITH THEIR FRIENDS!!! bebe and tweek and kenny and craig and marj and jimmy are all on the couch and kyle and is like "baby, will you find the colander in the kitchen please?" and stan is like *squints in dyslexia* but is like "okay, be right back" but then kyle is like "wait you forgot something" and gives stan a little kiss AND EVERYONE IS LIKE "wAit yOu fOrgOt SoMEthiNg" and kyle is like "yEAH HAHAAHA REAL FUNNY ASSHOLES!!!! ITS GONNA BE REAL HARD TO LAUGH W/ YA TEETH ON THE FLOO--"
but stops midword bc stan makes a tiny whining sound like "kyyyy? i'm so sorry, but i can't find it." and kyle's face immediately softens and he's like "stan, what did i say about apoloizin' when you don't need to? i’ll be right there, sweetheart. <3" and everyones like i'LL bE RiGh-- and kyles like “tRY IT AGAIN, IDIOTS!!! SEE WHAT HAPPENS SEE--oh god, stan, don't cry!" :'c *races over*
girls, gays and theys!!! my sons are in LOOOVEEE!!! ;-;;;;
but yeah, no, when ravesey starts #hating, kyle calls stan sweetheart like alllll the time, all the little cutesy-wutzy, fuzzy-fuzzy nicknames that he claimed to hate because stan just makes his heart so warm. also jersey kyle saying "baby" in the jersey accent??? like saying sweetheart, baby, honey...I KNOW IT SOUNDS CUTE!!!
( ky does also call ravenstan zeeskeit and stan does call jersey mi sabelotodo like in his letter, btw xx )
okay, last thing, is that honestly learning how to love things and being vulnerable and soft is how he realized he wanted to be a guidance counsellor and provide support to kids like him who didn't have it growing up/being gentle with them and patient and nurturing.
the post!rm soft kyle psychology major/elem guidance counsellor era is my faaav like his character development is CRAZY!!
my comfort television shows are say yes to the dress and masterchef (which means that kyle's favorite comfort tv shows are them) and kyle is so gordon ramsey coded in that with all the adults he's screaming at them, calling them worthless and idiot sandwiches, but with kids he just like kneels all the way down and speaks sweetly to them and is like "i'm not leaving until you laugh" <3
like i think a little girl is in there one time ( i think it might be nova, who is the ravesey kid bc i had them adopt one of kyle's troubled guidance counsellor children...also she looks like this, yes i made her look like havana rose liu because i'm obsessed with her. she's a qt )
but yes, so a little girl starts crying in kyle's office and he's like patting her on the back like "it's okay to cry. don't be embarrassed -- look." then pulls out his phone and points to his lock screen and its stan in a black cd tee-shirt with all the tattoos and piercings and eyeliner in like a pair of ripped skinny jeans and the combat boots.
then jers is like "okay, so this is my boyfriend. and he cries alllll the time. over very silly things." and is like "like, the otha day we were goin' to the store and he saw this tiny little dog, even tinier than you, and she was wearin' this pink sweater and he started crying...bc he thought she was cute. like full waterworks, everything." and the little girl starts laughing and he's like "there we go! c': see, it's all gonna to be okay, my friend. take a piece of candy on your way out. see you later." and fist bumps her bUT SHE HUGS HIM AND HE'S LIKE AAA
anyways...actual angel jersey kyle...my beloved.
-uncle nina, who is leaking out of her eyeballs
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On the OTHER HAND after a rough day you get Karl who curls into your lap like a dog, produces a pen from his pocket, and starts doodling over your arms. He likes to draw on all Sapnap's battle/training scars in particular to turn his biceps into a canvas, each scar bruise and mark becoming its own character with intense lore of how they relate to each other and Karl getting giddy whenever a new one pops up for the excuse to kiss over it and then draw a new cat face over the marred skin and add it to the family (so at least Sapnap doesn't have to worry about his scarring making him ugly, not that that was much of a worry in the first place). Sapnap doesn't really pay it mind but it entertains Karl and he loves the attention so he lets it be even if they wash off with every shower.
Q doesn't get such fluffy things- he's too busy and self conscious. instead he rolls up the sleeves of his dress shirts to reveal little vines and flowers etched onto the skin. he takes extra care not to get them wet or wash them off so they last there as long as possible. he considers getting them tattooed but Karl likes making different designs every time and the soft press of ballpoint is too soothing to give up, so he leaves his skin blank for him.
on a particular night, Karl kindly asks him if he can play connect-the-dots with his beauty marks lining his face. quackity refuses to let him do it in pen so he has to borrow eyeliner from Tina and convince q he'll wash it right off after if he doesn't like it. and as q lays on his back and Karl straddles his lap like that one meme of the two girls doing makeup ,he squirms and makes jokes to brush off his nerves, and it's just a silly drawing, why is he nervous (because he doesn't like being scrutinized so much. his looks were half of what he had going for him, and stupid fucking techno had to fuck up his nice face-). but when Karl rolls off him and gets him a mirror, there are little constellations dotting his cheeks and nose over each mole, forming little abstract shapes and swirls and stars and flowers. and along his scar is a detailed vine pattern to frame it, as if the scar were merely a crack in an ivy covered wall that made it all the prettier. when Karl sees q is going to cry (quackity doesn't- he doesn't want it getting it smudged, so by god he tries not to) he offers to let quackity do the same to him. quackity draws a dick on his cheek to fuck with him and pretends he doesn't linger on his own reflection from then on with a faint smile, even when the drawings are long gone.
this got out of hand im so sorry im not sorry lmao get fucked
MELTS oh this is so adorable i love when ckarl is a natural born storyteller and can see the beauty and meaning in anything, and it never comes easier than with the people he loves most! and the fact that csap just fondly puts up with it but it means absolutely everything to cq that they still find him pretty and worthy of their attention i cry
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