#this is gonna sound a little depressing

[redtrobug]

so trans?

Heehoo

#i guess by technicality #im not cis #but #this is gonna sound a little depressing #ive never been trans enough for trans people or cis enough for cis people so #i dont really like hsing either label #answerin

[hecksupremechips]

Come back home when you have some sense

You can throw your life away just not at my expense

You’re not the son I raised

#jhariah #this one just rawrrfrrr #and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’ #nice #im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it #god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like #hnnnghhh #hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot #the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM #sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’ #like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke #but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me #and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards #the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome #the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear #its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe #but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill #and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill #you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit #and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it #and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was #very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me #which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me #yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍

[foldingfittedsheets]

Food is a prison.

#ramblies #maybe I’m just depressed but god I am too sad to eat why does my body persist in its wailing? #nothing sounds remotely appetizing and we have very little food in the house so it’s gonna be a fun night #I wish we had protein drinks so I could just chug something and get on with moping

[tecchous-thicc-buttocks]

GUYS IM GOING CRAZY HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THIS ON THE BSD WIKI BEFORE????

#“you want me to twinkify him?” “no i want him to be specifically fyodor-level twink” #I HOWLED A LITTLE BIT FYODOR IS THE STANDARD FOR PHYSICALLY UNFIT #GOOD GUY FYODOR SOUNDS SO CURSED TOO??? throwback to anime protag eyes fedya *shudders* #SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP #imagine tachi going thru the universal lost parent experience of seeing a twink from the back and calling out his brother's name #and it's just some anemic russian terrorist #they're so unrelated which makes this 1000x better #i would rock tachi's brother's shit if he wasn't. yk. 🕴️ #only people with great taste fawn over dead men with no build #they should start a club for the lanky depressed men of bsd #fyodor tachi's brother lovecraft bram even kunikida ango oda and mushi could join #born to babygirl forced to emo twink #it's the “good guy fyodor” that pushed me over the edge im never gonna stfu about this #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd the soldier #bsd fyodor

[sophiethewitch1]

kinda wanna write a fic where the dog is literally the deus ex machina

#sophie speaks #dog backwards is god yknow it makes sense #me and my undertale bullshit back on it again #i have 3 fic ideas for it. one is a meta commentary one is just about a reader with a chronic illness and one is my love for desperate read #-rs returning in full blown massive fashion. and also identity issues but all 3 of these fics have that last one just has that. a lot lot #all include my weird DID metaphors and multiverse shenanigans #because honestly all sans/sans shippers do not understand the weirdness of loving an alternate version of urself #they dont lean into it #i mean im not gonna write sans/sans I'm an x reader till death because i love self love. also sans could not love himself look at that guy #but undertale itself has so many cool themes u can build off of that i just. i wanna grab and squeeze em out like juice #and i mean its not like i can do www at the moment I've written like... 9k this month it ain't going good #might as well just enjoy the depression spiral. i know that doesn't sound very possible but yknow. we rock w it #im just in pain all the time... ill go back to the docs soon and maybe just start taking straight up opiods #but until then i can only do things if i feel there is absolutely 0 pressure on me to do them #once again thanks school system i love these learned behaviors you traumatised into me they're really useful #what was i saying? did i mention im a little scatterbrained atm

[hauntingblue]

NAMI HAS TAKEN ACTION!!! LETSGOOOOO

#when is uta gonna physically fight luffy..... it's just a matter of time #shanks planning on coming back?? its been 84 years.... that probably was only said to makino bc he is trying to sway her.... girl run... #'that's our local sea beast' so he just hangs out??? well fuck me #luffy was just fucking around about the making a new era and look what happened.... apollo blessed him.... #the sun god omg.... nika..... ahdahsaj i ws fucking around with that too HAJSHAJA #oh no shit he does actually come back.... i thought this was the same time... omg... THAT'S EVEN SKETCHIER!!! #thinking luffy wss just here alone depressed in foosha and ace was there alone depressed on the forest too...... 🥺🥺🥺 #ohhhh little luffy....... like i know she is not dead but something happened..... what.... #oh it might seem like she died... elegia destroyed bc of shanks??? what is that and tot music (sounds like catalan meaning all music to me) #beckman has haki too? like zoro........ #SHE HAS BEEF WITH SHANKS?? SEE HOW HE IS SKETCHY!! WHATS WITH THAT FACE??? #i need to make my evil shanks cosnpiracy board but that whill be implied on my other bigger conspiracy board i am sure #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 1030 #zeus got free... its namis turn... #usopp and nami being strong and brave for tama..... exactly..... #and so they meet again..... oh new break with momo....... #otama tamed big mom too omg ajdhajshaja prometheus saying she enters mom mode with kids under 10 AHDHAJSHAJ #no way big mom is turning on kaido for this.... SHE KNOWS RYUO TOO??? SHE IS NOT TOUCHING HIM OMG #goodbye page one... jesus.... now his sister..... damn #damn. wasnt expecting all that. now nami can take zeus either way hehe #episode 1031 #when are we gonna get ad breaks for the rest of the crew.... we get it zoro and luffy are important.... okay.... #sanji carrying zoro.... here we go.... #PEROSPERO????? DIEEEE!!!! WHERE IS CARROT??? #komachiyo..... TAMAA!!!!! usopp tells nami to take her and run.... NAH!!!! FUCK HER SHIT UP!!!!!! #nami finally fighting omg i have been waiting for this moment #episode 1032

[kitsuna21]

I was birthed today

#kit talks #yayyyy… #tw: vent #I think this is the first one I truly feel sad #like I don’t really want it to be my birthday because of what that entails and it’s gonna be a year since…things happened #and I don’t like the attention really and I just want to spend the day doing fuck all #maybe it’s the seasonal depression or the fact I’m still going through the weird identity crisis #or maybe the fact I’m not out and I’m constantly reminded of that #I just wanna hang out with my closest friends man #I feel bad for saying it but I don’t wanna spend it with my family??? like I know it sounds kinda dumb but yeah #but hoorayy I was birthed today #I will draw more little guys today and work on the animatic thingy me thinks

[thatone-churro]

imma keep it real with you, besties, i’m really running low on the will to exist in this world as it stands 🥴

#i dont think i really want to die per say #there is a life i’d love to live but i just don’t think i could ever get it #not with the way the world is tbh #that fantasy sounds so nice but. there’s too many precise circumstances that have to be met to get to live it. it’s not happening. #which doesn’t help anything #i’m not gonna do anything don’t worry; this isn’t a call for help just a little vent #i’ll probably delete it in the morning. the depression’s just been kicking my ass lately #grace being kinda serious for once #text post #personal

[ditzydisko]

Okay now say it with me: Cereal is my friend

#haaaiiii #I've been surviving on cereal for like. 3 weeks now 🫰😗 #mostly for the depression #partially because none of my comfort foods sound good rn #partially also because i dont wanna cook #but its mostly the depression #sorry im gonna be depression posting for a little bit ur free to unfollow if you dont wanna see it #or block the tag: personal #anyway #personal

[mayonakano-archive]

sometimes i think about all the things i have to do as a senior (like prom and stuff) and i just. space out a bit

#leoposting #do i even want to go? nobody's gonna ask me to prom and all my friends graduated already #and prom tickets are... super expensive. #and even if i do go there's like. a 99% chance i'm getting forced into a dress... #ugh. instead of prom i'm gonna drive myself to the sea and throw myself in #ok that sounds a little depressing i promise it's in more of a fun way

[minamotosousuke]

reading this book called “the guncle” which is totally funny and heartwarming and I recommend it to all (esp the audiobook) but all I can think about is a mitsukou version of it

#which is actually very depressing omg this is gonna sound AWFUL #but anyways #it’d be Mitsuba being with Kou for basically ever and like being welcomed into Kou’s family eventually #and teru marrying and having kids #but kou dying in a car crash #and some years- not many pass but Teru’s wife gets really sick #and under the pressure of that and of being the perfect Minamoto and husband and father and all that he gets addicted to prescription meds #so when his wife dies and he calls on Mitsuba to come because Mitsuba’s the closest thing to his dear dear brother he’ll ever get #he asks Mitsuba if he can take the kids on for 90 days while he goes into rehab #REALLY FUCKED UP PREMISE IK #but Mitsuba having these little snarky Minamotos who look just like Kou cause all the Minamotos look the same omg #the SASS ugh #love it

[indigodawns]

.

#man. had two therapy appointments today and i feel. just. very bad. not good. #first one is too much to go into but really the take away is don't do drugs kids #especially if you're fucking mentally ill #second one just... got to meet my new therapist. very young woman. very. ohh and aww and she started #with. hey. we're doing cbt :) look at this neat little printout that you can fill in :) #when i tell you i wanted to tear off my own skin #i still do! but being very cool and mature about it and calming myself down by eating and watching seokjin and that did soothe #but this woman right. 'so you think the world is an awful place? is that right? is that one of your core beliefs?' #no!!!!!! yes!!!! but like. i don't think changing my mindset re: the world is my problem??? #is it??? like... the world is awful and unfair yes but i want to React to that in a way that's useful. THAT is what i want to changr #i want to not be too tired or overstimulated or whatever to even have empathy for anyone or anything #or too numb/derealised/depersonalised whatever :'') #and she just... 'why are you sad? when are you sad?' like god fucking hell im fucking depressed okay?? we know this!!! it's fine!!! #a fucking cbt thing im....... #maybe i SHOULD give it a proper go but like. i just want feedback. i want someone to talk to #god fuck im gonna do something calming or whatever #i know i sound arrogant and whatever but man. #edit: did the big girl thing and reached out to my irl friends and sent a long ranting voicenote #and ate something easy #and im feeling a bit more like i can breathe again so <333

[starkidlabs]

My fish died and i didn’t even get to say goodbye :(

#I know this sounds really silly but this is like the first fish ive owned who had a proper little personality #he literally got depressed because all his friends died and we couldn’t get him any new ones because it was lock down #like he would always come up to the front to see you #I’m gonna miss him :(

[pizzapizzadickz]

.

#diary #personal #i was gonna journal but im far too tired now and i cant. #so instea imma ramble here. #anyways. i was thinking lately how as i got earlier i sorta would just. cut off parts of myself. #like. id observe everyone around me. figure out what was socially acceptable. and remove what wasnt. #sometimes... people would say little things. and i work very very hard to to fix that about myself. #like. if i dont understand humor. i worked REALLY hard so i could. and so i could figure out how to joke and talk with others. #and god. anytime i make friends i try REALLY FUCKING HARD to make sure i like. do their activities that theh like. #i just sorta hope that i can have friends that way. if they like cars well now i do. if they like computers now i do. etc. #and like. i used to try hard to keep up with pop culture shit so i could feel included. cuz otherwise id be left out. #honeslty all of elemetry school i remember trying so hard to fit in and it really made me feel like i lost myself in it all. #i remember in high school a lot of this came to a head and i sorta just. felt lost a lot. #i like. feel a lot better now. i dont do things i dont wanna. i dont try so hard to blend in. but its still really hard sometimes. #i remember. i used to always have to ask what people mean. what a joke was about. i felt excluded from things a lot. #i sorta. gave up on friends in like. grade 7-8ish. i was also sorta depressed. so id just. watch people #and in the winter. id sometimes walk around in little circles and make patterns in the snow. recess wasnt long enough tho #i remember in grade 3 when i sorta became the token loner id just. walk around aimlessly at school. #it was sad being excluded but i really learned to enjoy it to. to really feel the wind. to listen to the sounds. to feel present #i love the swings. still do. might be why i rock so much now? ive always just loved throwing my body around violently. #it honestly makes me really sad now bc it hurts now. i cant move in ways that are fun anymore. #i can rock tho. and i do a lot. yknow i saw a girl(?) on the bus the other day rocking #it was so... strange to see it from the outside. i wonder if thats what i look like now that i think about it. #it was distressing tho bc they seemed upset. bc thats how i rock when upset. just. very regimented. #theyd stop abruptly. then continue. i could really only see myself in that. i wanted to ask if they were okay but... #i felt that it could potentially cause more stress. besides. idk if theyre autistic or whatnot. it could be invasive. i hope they were okay #mn. i sorta wish i had never just. cut away at myself. removing what i deemed garbage. #im... so much different from the way i portay myself sometimes. #i love looking at things. just. staring at stuff. watching people. and. when im with others i remove that. #when i work i have to remove the fun from things. and that sucks.

[aquarelleskies]

today was in so many ways stressful enough to trigger a migraine so i need to stop staring into my phone but over 3 hours (london innit) to and from a medical appointment WITHOUT EARPHONES means i had to percieve the coughing crowded world for much longer than sustainable & need to decompress but and the only cure i know is Grace/Wastelands and scrolling so... 🤷‍♀️

#had to use a special treat that i only save for absolute swamp times: cheesy af imaginary scenarios featuring Lady Don't Fall Backwards #sorry to anyone reading but i need my emotional support screaming into void #now more than ever. i am soooo disconnected from the world and i hate it #i don't mean relationships. but normal interactions. getting a coffee. smiling at someone. etc #saw a guy today who looked simultaneously like a fashion model and a homeless person and his face was so intriguing i Staaaared while cross #ing the road and he definitely noticed and now i feel awkward as fuck but also it doesnt matter #and this is what i mean. i miss just SEEING people. existing alongside ppl. not necessarily making a connection with anyone but just Being #where there is life and sound and leaves are falling into someone's tea and just fuck idk #anyway i am a little manic in the most depressed way imaginable rn.. so goodnight #oh also accepting prayers for my bro who has covid AGAIN istg this worry is gonna give me a breakdown. he'll be fine etc. #ANYWAY. love you all #personal

[wren-kitchens]

depression is so weird why don’t I get to feel anything now I thought it was just serotonin that fucked off apparently it’s everything??

#things keep happening and i’m not feeling Anything about it it’s very bizarre #if it’s very bad i’ll feel a little #if it’s very good itll just not be sad adjacent nothingness #this is so weird #like hello was anyone gonna tell me I stopped having emotions or was I expected to find that out myself after several months #it’s kind of funny people keep asking how I am and my response every time is ‘fuck knows’ #your guess is as good as mine babe I probably know less than you do #this isn’t really a vent i’m just kind of curious if anyone else has this #I get anxiety still but not the emotions I just get the adrenaline and physical affects #I cannot tell you how weird that is #what’s weirder is I can’t actually. remember what emotions feel like HKFHDJ #THAT SOUNDS SO BAD #I think it’s kind of funny tbh #wren wrambles #uh how does one tag #depression #I guess?