#then my stomach acted up

[chronicallyonline-fandomwh0r3]

I measured with my heart into a crockpot and now I have Devine stew in front of me that is helping with my current issues of acid reflux.

(yes, my body has decided to try and destroy my life again and I had to go to the ER Wednesday for it. just have to wait and see if the acid in my stomach is going to be a permanent or temporary issue this time.)

@britcision @stealingyourbones

calling my fellow body broken buddies here to see this delicious food.

#this shit is ridiculous #i was fine #then my stomach acted up #made me think i was having a heart attack #nope #just stupid acid problems #blegh #AGAIN

[isbergillustration]

I feel like absolute garbage today so no new art (sorry to the peeps whose commissions i promised to do today) but here is an update on this thing. Amputated part of its waist which is good, glued its legs on back to front which is. Unfortunate.

#n3783457 #my art #combination bad headache and fucked up my meds so ive been been seconds from throwing up for two hours straight #bleh #going to lay down and see if not having a cat stomping on my stomach helps the nausea #been taking my meds again like a good person for like six days but the very physical anxiety symptom that used to drive me to alcoholism is #still here. anyway. that's two years worth of oversharing for the art account. good night. #someone put what i think is a homestuck tag on this already and i consider that an act of aggression #go back to misidentifying my original art as welcome to nightvale or magnus archives if you must but homestuck?

[moeblob]

You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)

#moe talks a lot #i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry #and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds #LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO #shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds #BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER #i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up #i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong #after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before #YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain #oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older #and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds #holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang #sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat #but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like #welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant #anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain #im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake #but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry #anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering

[notetaeker]

November 24, 2023 - Friday

Jumuah Mubarak! What a lovely day today✨ did some work, picked up a paintbrush for the first time in 4 months, and saw a brilliant sunset. Seeing videos of Palestinian hostages, kids who locked up for 8 years, smiling and embracing their moms warmed my heart. Ceasefire for a few days is not enough. End the genocide now. Dismantle the apartheid state.

#😔 #my stomach is acting up still 💔 #hope it’s not too bad #🥲 #praying #studyblr #notes

[jademickian]

I think it’s pretty neat that stargazing was a Gallavich thing. 

In season 2, Mickey says “you want us to put a blanket out and look for shooting stars next?” There is that—once again—an inner desire hidden behind the veil of a witty rhetoric. The dawn is popularly the symbol of new hope, the sun coming up shining its light, enveloping the ground with a potential of joy and rebirth. But with stargazing, the darkness in which it transpires precedes the coming of dawn. It is the hoping itself, the wishing, the tilting of head towards the sky, like the heart whispering a prayer to the universe. The sun is a very bright star that illuminates all. It’s overwhelming with its promise of renewal and warmth of love. That's why it’s much easier to look at tinier, less brighter stars at night. The multitude of them enough to give light—not too much—but just enough to stare at, so it doesn’t hit you all at once. The dawn would tell him he deserves to love and be loved, and that contrary to his belief, he’s not fucked for life. It’s a crazy jump, and the blaze of it might even burn. Meanwhile, the twinkle of the stars would tell him that a boy likes him enough to hang out with him, and that it is okay to long for something so far out of reach, for now.

In season 5, Ian is having some grass time (he’s lying on the grass), stargazing. Earlier than this, he mentions you can never see this many stars from Chicago because of light pollution. Mickey calls, and he holds it up to stare at his ringing phone. Contemplating whether he should or should not. He stares at the stars—weaver of fates, guider of travels. Desire, once again, for answers. A confirmation. Some direction. There must be something because here, they’re clearer, unlike back home where it’s hindered by stray city lights. Maybe this could help clear his clouded mind. Maybe he could draw constellations by connecting the dots and it’ll show him what to keep, what to lose. A glint. A flicker. “That’s the most important thing, to find somebody to love, right? Who loves you back for who you are.” But the thing about the stars’ divine message is that it could often be misunderstood. Misinterpreted. Maybe the stars will sigh, oh well. Guess you could take detours. Because another thing about stars is that, although enigmatic to a fault, they know where everything must go. They are close to the language of the gods. Perhaps for now, the answer is to be apart because in the grand scheme of things, it will all play out as planned. 

In season 7, together, under the very same stars. It is hope and desire realized. Who would’ve thought? It was inexplicable, almost alien, that this is how their story is going now. But to the stars, it’s an old song. This is exactly where they should be. It’s the same narrative back then under the bleachers, when they didn’t know better. When voicing your feelings seems a futile and gargantuan feat. It’s the same story now, when they reconvene after, celestial forces refusing to cut these ties. When feelings are all you could voice out, as you’ve learned that if they swim inside you long enough, you’ll drown. “God I missed you.” The stars have known since the beginning. Its plans, slowly unfolding themselves. The wisdom they hold seem nearer now that if reached by the fingertips could be cold to the touch—not yet, not yet. 

But even stars could grow impatient. 

Even stargazer lilies—observer of heavenly bodies, predictor of futures—bloom facing the sky. Upwards, toward the stars, the flower looks upon. Maybe they’re ready for the dawn. The sun, the bigger and brighter star. The ball of fire catapulting itself, yet it doesn’t burn. It caresses, warm to the touch, and over the land gives life. It is here before them, and it will be here after. 

“Now?” Now.

#i had coffee and idk where to spend all the extra energy on #it is 3am right now and im palpitating lol #anyway #i need to sleep i have class at 8am #and my mind and fingers are itching to do something #so here we are #whatever this is #this makes sense to me now but in the morning it prolly wont #jade jabbers #my stomach is acting up what the hell was in that coffee #goodnight #shameless #gallavich #ian and mickey #ian x mickey #stargazing #gallavich ficlet #stargazing motif #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below) #My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm.. #pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread... #I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever. #And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

[chandralia]

no I think it’s good when bkdks come together to literally question what’s going on with bkdk because sometimes we get wrapped up in everything we forget to take a step back so WHY did Deku lie to Bakugo about what caused black whip, why are Deku’s words/thoughts about it always unfinished, WHY have we not had access to what Deku’s thinking in so long, WHY did Deku severely suppress his emotions and cover his MOUTH with black whip before going into this final battle with ShigAFO?????

#I saw toadsbogblog post and started SPIRALING sfkdhdgb #I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HE’S THINKING #this is an extensive build-up and I’m so nervous… #I know some people think bkdk talked already and that there’s a possibility of a flashback but… even if they did SOMETHING WAS STILL UNSAID #because Deku wouldn’t be acting this way if he had poured everything out #and it’s like at this point WHAT could it be… is it really just ‘oh Kacchan’s the most important person to me and always has been’ #or is it something else BECAUSE THIS SEEMS LIKE A LOT of effort to hide something that we already know????? #I’m really getting my stomach upset thinking about this please 😭 #bkdk #dkbk #bakudeku #dekubaku #:’)

[mandiemegatron]

Selfshippers with "selfshippers DNI" in their bio make me laugh, but its like... an awkward laugh.

"How dare you love the same character i do. How dare you wish that the guy I SHIP WITH would love and support you 😤😤😤 HOW DARE YOU GET FANART WITH MY F/O!! HES MINE YOU CANT HAVE HIM!!"

Babe... go touch some grass and drink some water. Maybe you'll feel better. 😬

#mandie vents #i sigh. #the internal cringe I feel when a fellow self-shipper tries to rip me a new asshole for shipping with Law #you Law bitches are fucking CRAZY #like i would love to not feel uncomfortable on my own blog thanks. #just block me ? there doesnt need to be an interaction - you can just block me and not see my blog anymore ?? #this is why its so hard to make friends in the self-shipper community. yall get all up in arms over your fictional other and act like #you fuckin own them or something. #actually makes my heart break and makes me sick to my stomach. why cant we just be friends...?

[urmomsfavelesbian]

im being so normal about this daya

#new gf daya unlocked #daya with hoops daya with her hood up daya with her hoodie that features a leash hook im normal #daya blep 🥹🥹🥹 #her SMILE 😭😭😭😭 sick 2 my stomach #daya betty #dayaaaa mf bettyyy 😩 #i swiped up and called her cute and she responded to me so i’ll be acting increasingly unwise for the foreseeable future #if you saw me repost this no you didn’t 🫶

[aro-culture-is]

quick note - this blog is gonna be sparse again for at least this week. trying new medications and tbh initial side effects are not super pleasant + actual effects build up. as a result: currently as if unmedicated for mental health, with anxiety+ side effect, extra fatigue, dizziness, and fatigue. it's uh, sure something.

totally recognize that most of y'all know we're absent at times due to health things, just wanted to give a heads up that this one is at least anticipated.

#fun fact sometimes condensing meds just means poorer treatment of some conditions #this is a re-expansion + new thing #so that instead of poorly treating my mental health and using an unusually high dose SNRI for another (physical) condition #i will hopefully both be in less pain AND not depressed af AND also have an appetite again #i doubt i will be lucky and not have a fucked stomach due to meds but one can hope that an appetite will allow me to eat foods that upset #my stomach a lot less #my health is forever a massive balancing act #every time a medical thing is like 'so what meds do u take' i'm like here i wrote it down for u #and they're like 'oh. ooookay. let me just...' *five minutes of typing and clicking later* #'so! what did you come in for again? uhuh. you said you experience pain daily? with your chronic pain thing? hm. have you tried yoga?' #/gen #like. straight up every time i say 'i am in pain all the time due to fibromyalgia' they are like 'ooh studies say regular exercise helps' #and like. theoretically yes! but also. i would be lying if i said the fibromyalgia studies i've skimmed don't set off general 'bad science' #alarm bells in my brain #like... cool you performed a fibromyalgia study with... all male lab rats? mhmm? so are you aware fibromyalgia appears to occur #overwhelmingly in women? like. data seems to suggest between 70-85%? #(not that the data can't still indicate things but it certainly makes male rats a poor choice of model for tests on it) #also just... idk i've looked at some metaanalysis and been like 'okay cool theory and for all i know about human bio or bio in general that #sounds more or less correct BUT. you never discussed that one study on this subject that did NOT support your conclusion. #and that's 1) interesting when it was the most diverse group of subjects and the exceptions often teach just as much as the 'rule' #2) just shitty science. tell me how your theory is still credible when some evidence doesn't fit the model. #like... 'given that all other studies were primarily conducted on white american women in their 30s to 40s it is possible that this model #only explains (the early effects of fibro since that's a typical onset period) / (a possible genetic link primarily found in white women) / #(a possible sign of bias in diagnosis that demonstrates the possibility that there are different causes) / combinations of all of those #like... idk a paper that just throws out things that don't support it is a pretty big red flag #it doesn't mean the conclusion is entirely incorrect but it is often important to understand the context in which it applies #like... it's very easy to jump to an incorrect conclusion if you used something in the wrong context #ie: thumbs up is a good job / positive thing in a lot of western civilizations. teenage kee once went to china and discovered it to be #neutral to offensive in many areas outside of major tourist locations that were used to it #anyways i gotta sleep

[curly-cottage-girl]

I feel like I’m losing the battle of treading water and am just starting to drown in exhaustion now

#I would take a day off a work #but people have been out sick #including a coworker who’s been out for a while since she got sepsis and pneumonia #she’s out of the hospital now and all but obv still needs time to recover #I’ve definitely been kinda sick with Something all week but obv wasn’t gonna cause a fuss over something small #when I have no obvious symptoms and we’re short on ppl #now I think this is just my Stomach Problems acting up from whatever that was #but I’ve been tired for a while #I have stuff I need to do over the weekends #but I also need to just be dead to the world for at least a day #but then I still have no energy to do all of the things I need to do #and never any time or energy to try to get back into hobbies #aaaghhhh

[umilily]

strawberrry milk post relevant again bc i accidentally came into possession of 1.5kg strawberries

#lily talks #(considering my stomach was acting up earlier i don't know if i should risk it though) #this.... is unexpected #they were on sale so i forced myself to go to the store to buy ingredients for more mochi but uhm.... #i may have accidentally stolen the box of the person in front of me at checkout #like the cashier was going at LIGHTNING speed even for german/austrian standards #and i was just shoving shit into my bag trying to keep up #anyway #while rearranging i noticed that uhm.... instead of 2 i suddenly had 3 boxes #couldn't find the person anywhere in the parking lot i'm assuming they already left #so... i guess... they're mine now? #illegal strawberries #what will i do with them?

[zaggyzoo]

it's official ‼️

#from march 1st i'm gonna do part time instead of full time #i can't fucking wait i have 10 more days of work to power through then a week off and then hopefully I won't feel so tired all the time #😭😭😭🫶🏻 #also i have a hairdresser appointment on my week off i kinda wanna do some sort of curtain bangs even though i have the middle part cowlick #i think it could work what do you guys think #also i need my stomach to assest right now. please don't act up again

[madamescarlette]

🩵

#it honestly never stops being funny to me that I spend the entire time leading up to going to confession #acting like I'm at the cliffs I'm sick to my stomach with worry #and then immediately after I'm like 😊😊🥰 the world is so beautiful and bright everything is good and right!!! #anyway. can i go where you go can we always be this close. #and other such truths about being this close with somebody (Somebody) who loves you this much

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

..

#hi back for now bc it's fall break and I'm stuck on campus #trying not to complain about it but I've been having stomach issues for at least the past couple of weeks #it's been acting up since I got here but the past few weeks and specifically the past few days it's become a lot more intense #I made an appointment with the medical clinic here on campus and they're treating me with something for a possible stomach ulcer right now #I have a follow-up in a couple of weeks #I'm struggling to keep on top of all my thoughts and feelings and emotions right now too #which may be causing or compounding the stomach issues. honestly who knows. #all I know for sure rn is that I feel very tired and worn out despite it being fall break #and I wish I didn't feel this way #kinda sad and very tired #it's a perfect opportunity to catch up on school work that I've fallen behind on. and yet I feel completely unable to even think #about school. hhhhh. 🙃 #it's been such a hard year guys. and I don't want to complain or wallow but I wish I could just break down have a good cry #or a screaming fit if needed #just get it all out #and then maybe I'd be able to cope a little better #unfortunately I'm not sure that's how it works. so I guess I'm stuck feeling like this for now.

[lesbianlotties]

thinking about mike flanagan series and villains and sure, bev keane should probably take the crown for worst person ever, but my god the hate i feel for peter quint is unparalleled

#just remembered frederick usher he's also up there on the list on characters i hate so much my stomach fucking hurts when they're on screen #it's just. the scene where peter tries to act like he didn't treat rebecca like shit and he's like 'i forgot about it :D' i am going to KIL #the way he talks to hannah.... i've never known hate like this #infinite kudos to oliver jackson cohen for playing both the one male character i love (luke crain) and this absolute monster asshole i hate #impressive #watching bly manor