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emelinstriker · 4 months

Note

May you share your TFP Decepticon headcanons 👁️👁️

If you want specifics, then their domestic lives? (Or what one can achieve akin to a domestic life in time of war 💀)

I did NOT expect to see any ask regarding TFP- Or at least till I switch fandoms again- So like I can't really think of many X Reader headcanons right now. So I just wrote down like 3 for each. I'm also not quite sure how to condense domestic points, cuz I suck at general fluff when my hyperfixation is elsewhere- So sorry if these don't feel like they're really in the domestic direction fhgnfhg

Only doing some Decepticons though-

☆ ~ Headcanons ~ ☆

☆ Megatron

He do be a busy mech, so he doesn't have too much time on his servos. Therefore he cherishes it whenever he gets to have private moments with just his human and no interruptions.

Likes to carry you around on his shoulder pad- It just generally makes it safer for you, in his opinion, and more comforting for him.

Any that would merely look at you weirdly would face the wrath of Lord Megatron. You can tell him not to punish the other Cybertronian though. He does listen... sometimes.

☆ Starscream

Mans refusing to show affection towards you around other Decepticons, especially Megatron. But he's just melting around you when in private.

He prefers recharging with you lying on him. It's oddly soothing having his human on his chassis.

Tends to look for you as comfort whenever he had a bad day with Megatron.

☆ Soundwave

Despite the amount of work he does and how busy he is, he doesn't really fail at also paying attention to you. He's truly a multi-tasker.

Would let Laserbeak play with you though if his extra appendages and music can't keep you busy.

Very loving towards his human. He may not talk, but he uses emoticons on his visor to display how much he loves you.

☆ Shockwave

Just don't play with whatever materials he needs to conduct his experiments and you're good to go. Play with his antennae and ear fins while on his shoulder pad instead.

He gets easily distracted by his human. He knows it's illogical with the major size difference, and how he should just be able to ignore you. But he can't help it nor explain this phenomenon.

He also also can't explain why he has this urge to gently pat you with a digit.

☆ Knockout

While he does buff himself on his own, or has Breakdown help him, he does enjoy it when you're buffing him instead as well. Especially when he's in his alt mode.

Speaking of which, expect drive-in theater dates. Just don't get his interior dirty with snack crumbs.

Worries a lot about your health. If you're sick, he'll keep you close to him to make sure you're actually alright. But no kisses from him till you're no longer coughing and sneezing. He just buffed himself and doesn't need your sickly fluids on his frame.

☆ Predaking

Tends to pick up you up whenever he wants attention. You were talking to Steve? Nah, now you gotta give you giant mecha dragon pets and kisses.

He also enjoys carrying you around on his frame whenever he can. At least he won't have to look where he goes this way.

While he has to go on missions from time to time, it's not a common thing due to his value, so a lot of his time is spent protectively watching over his human.

#tfp x reader #transformers prime #headcanons #megatron x reader #starscream x reader #soundwave x reader #shockwave x reader #knockout x reader #predaking x reader #cybertronian x human #transformers x human

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errolluck · 13 days

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Your honor, they are ace and in love.

(Soundwave would totally respect Meg's boundaries. Being a supportive husband 100% fits him)

#transformers #transformers fanart #transformers prime #megatron #soundwave #megasound #tfp megatron #tfp soundwave #tfp megasound #tfp fanart #asexuality #asexual #This is was made as a stress reliever due to what happened yesterday with my fanfic #Ace MegaSound makes me happy #Megatron being asexual is one of my main headcanons #maccadam

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medicon · 1 year

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Retirement Home AU<3

Autobots

Optimus

that one grandpa who has a concerning amount of grandchildren visiting him

wakes up randomly during the night to tell staff members about his 27947293th battle with megatron

tries to keep the peace (and never succeeds), lectures all the other patients when they fight

*stares off into space* i have a vision..

Ratchet

either a random guy, or the head of staff

everything is perfectly organized in his room, if anyone moves his stuff he throws his cane at them

always complaining about his sore joints, has full conversations with himself on the daily

will throw a fit if someone else reads the newspaper before he does

Bumblebee

the grandson that visits every week

befriended some of the other patients, has to suffer through hours of "back when I was your age..."

seems like the sweetest angel, but actually helps smuggle prohibited things into the home

the flamethrower wasn't his idea

Arcee

that one great aunt your parents told you not to talk to

has poisoned megatron's food on several occasions, doesn't plan on stopping either

probably that one patient who talks in a foreign language but refuses to translate it for anyone else

knows how to make anything in the retirement home into a weapon

Smokescreen

the staff member that is way too cheery

probably ends up causing serious injury to a patient by accident

tries to make sure everyone has their medicine and is getting along, but ends up causing chaos instead

^_^ everyone please stop fighting!! *stands perfectly still in the midst of everyone throwing objects at each other*

Decepticons

Megatron

pissy old grandpa (what did you expect?)

*aggressively plays chess against his arch nemesis* *throws the board when he loses*

constantly mumbles about how he had more respect back in the old days, and how he would blast everyone to bits if he could

prune juice and nap time guy™️

Starscream

supreme ruler of the retirement home (self diagnosed)

falls down the stairs at least once a week after he tries to run away from the staff <- has committed felonies

sells his meds to the other patients, not sure how he hasn't been found out yet

tries to be cool and fails

Soundwave

he exists. that's basically it

unnerving patient who will follow you around without saying anything and simply stares at any visitors

has escaped the retirement home at least twice, has a horde of items he stole from other patients under his bed

gossips with his roommate (megatron)

Knockout

old person who is far too confident and charming for his age

*tries to be smooth and flirty but ends up falling and needs 3 nurses to help him up*

routinely smuggles alcohol into the building, no one knows where he gets it from

tried to bribe the staff to give him extra pillows

btw i am taking requests for anything in this au ♡

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bots-and-cons · 1 year

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Well hi What if the human reader gets really excited about a certain thing like they rescued her cat from a fall and he kisses their cheek and there are several red lipstick marks on their cheek. With Optimus, Soundwave, Megatron❤️🫶🏻

I mostly just focused on the whole lipstick mark thing rather than why the reader is kissing them. Also Idk what this is, I just wrote something that came to mind. The Soundwave one is super short though

~Megatron~

•Yesss, you should be worshiping him for helping you

•Some kisses will do though

•Afterwards he notices you looking at him kind of weirdly

•He asks why you're looking at him like that and you just smile and tell him that he’s got some lipstick marks on his face

•He of course doesn’t really know what lipstick is, but you’ll explain it to him

•You just show him on your phone’s front camera that he’s got some red marks on his face

•You’re snickering the whole time, because he has a very confused expression on his face and you found it funny

•Megatron doesn’t really care about having the lipstick marks to be honest, because they don’t really mean anything to him like they might to a human

•So until you want to get the marks off him, he’s just gonna be walking around with them

•You think it’s kind of cute, but also a little bit embarrassing, since Knockout connects the dots right away

•Knockout of course wouldn’t say anything to Megatron, because he values his life, but you and Knockout share a bit of a look

~Optimus Prime~

•You kiss him as a thank you for saving you from a fall and he’s also very thankful for the affection

•You didn’t really pay attention when he let you down from his shoulder, but a few hours later you notice you’d left some lipstick marks on Optimus’ cheek

•You get his attention and tell him what you noticed, and he lifts you to his shoulder and you start wiping off the lipstick marks with a tissue

•You’re blushing and muttering to yourself, hoping no one else noticed

•No one did, but you’re just convinced they just didn’t say anything out of courtesy

•You get the marks off and Optimus asks why you’re so flustered

•You just tell him you didn’t mean to leave marks on him or anything, and you just feel like it’s a bit embarrassing

•Optimus doesn’t really understand why you’d consider it embarrassing, the other bots know the two of you kiss so what’s the big deal

•Also something about him never being ashamed of something that shows you love him

~Soundwave~

•Soundwave doesn’t mind the marks, and his visor hides them anyway, so you don’t notice them until you go to kiss him again

•You ask him if he noticed it and he just nods and tells you he doesn’t mind them

•You do clean them off, but since he seemed to like them, you occasionally give him new ones

•Soundwave just treats them as marks of your affection and he’s kind of happy no one else sees them, so it’s a secret between just the two of you

#transformers #tfp #transformers prime #decepticons #megatron #soundwave #autobots #optimus prime #tfp headcanons #reader insert #tfp x reader #transformers x reader

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cozzzynook · 5 months

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Thought I'd give your ask a try. I love dad Optimus and son Bumblebee.

How do you think dad Optimus reacts to Bee's potential partners?

It depends on the partners honestly.

- if the partners are both Jazz and Prowl, he’s hesitant but gives approval.

- Optimus pulls Jazz aside and Prowl both together and alone and make it very clear he will use rank and force to make their spark’s miserable if they hurt his bitlet mech in any way.

- He tells Prowl in so many words he will make the stoic mech lose composure and shows Jazz that even if he is a beast in the field, he is no Optimus Prime.

- Of course Bumblebee never finds out, he just happily sits on his sires lap and tells him about his day and how happy he is while the others know just how terrifying Optimus really is as he smiles looking at the two who are statue still failing to look unfazed.

- If its Tarn trying to get with Bee Optimus does not care about peace nor does he care about being civil or having honor. He will make sure Tarn knows to never set pede near his bitlet again. Megatron does not do anything to stop Optimus, he warned his troops, they should’ve listened.

- Oddly if its Soundwave and Shockwave Optimus is down right pissed but does nothing to stop it. Bee is in his rebellious phase and he hopes it will end soon. He bites his glossa in hopes it will be over soon and Bee will pick a nice autobot he approves of. Bee does not. Optimus almost rips his finials off when he sees Bee taking care of Shockwave and Soundwaves sparklings Rumble and Frenzy. They look like a family pod and he wishes it would stop. Its Ratchet that pats his shoulder armor and tells him to look at the bright side, “he’s well protected. Those sparklings nearly offlined a mech for trying to touch him. What do you think Shockwave and Soundwave will do?” Optimus isn’t so against it after that, after all- anything goes to protect his bitlet.

- Optimus out right refuses for Bee to Starscream which leads to Bee running off and Optimus leaking coolant chasing after him. Optimus does NOT want anything to come of this and he can’t live a peaceful life cycle knowing his bitlet is mated to Starscream of all mechas. Until he sees how loving and genuine Starscream can be. He’s still a menace and a scrap screamer with everybot else but for Bee he’s at least tame, bare-able and sweet sparked.

- Optimus honestly puts the least amount of pressure on Thundercracker. He’s civil, plans things, looks at the bigger picture, is not Starscream or the little menace Skywarp. And he easily sees how smitten Thuncracker is about Bee. He didn’t put up much fight when he saw Bee returning those feelings and didn’t object when Thundercracker asked to spark bond with Bee. When TC is seen cuddling with Bee Optimus forgets TC is a decepticon who should not be relaxing in an autobot base with his bitlet wrapped in a blanket in recharge on his chassis while said seeker writes a play dedicated to his bitlet….Optimus actually doesn’t mind this. His bitlet is happy so he is happy.

- last but not least if its Blitzwing…Primus help them. Its every creators worst nightmare to know their sweet, precious gremlin bitlet is being courted by the likes of Blitzwing. The afthole seeker turned triple changer who courts his bitlet in some of the sweetest and most chaotic ways imaginable. Blitzwing draws countless images of Bumblebee in recharge, fueling, fighting and gazing at the stars. He would think it sweet if it weren’t the triple changer he saw half devour a mech for touching his bitlet inappropriately. The only reason he stopped was because Bee demanded him. Optimus was NOT fond of Blitzwing asking for Bumblebee’s servo and spark. Nor was he fond of how gentle Blitzwing could be with his bitlet when it was just the two of them. Optimus will deny stalking them he simply had the same route as they did. Even when he looked through their shared home and watched as Blitzwing made fuel for the both of them every lunar cycle without fail because apparently it was his love language.

-Optimus definitely didn’t break down leaking coolant the moment his bitlet said he was in love and spark bonded to Blitzwing. And no, Optimus didn’t hold Bee hostage in his arms leaking because he didn’t want to let his little bitlet go. He did no such thing.

Basically Dad optimus is protective and wants only the best for his baby bot while also being emotional.

☺️🍉🇵🇸🇨🇩🇾🇪🇭🇹

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cloudraker · 1 year

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heyo! I saw ur post and wanted to ask for tfp decepticons with a winged! S/o

preferably with megatron, soundwave or shockwave and knockout! Like how they would react and act around them, or like how they would use reader to their advantage? (Not in a bad way)

Reader has a long wingspan (18 ft) and is bigger than a normal human? Like smaller than Arcee but bigger than average.

Please tell me if that’s too much for you! And ty! <3 stay safe

Ofc!! And no worries, it's not too much at all :) Thank you sm for requesting <3

TFP Megatron, Soundwave, Shockwave, and Knock Out with a Winged S/o

Under the cut :)

Megatron

Honestly probably doesn't even notice you're any different at first until you start zipping around

I would say that of the four he's the one that cares the least

That isn't to say he doesn't care at all, far from it! He's got more than a handful of schemes, plots, ploys, etc ready to use when the need should arise

Depending on how you fly and such, he might take your movements into consideration when it comes to his own flight or when training troops. The information gets passed on to Starscream for the latter, but he's still aware of it

He doesn't expect you to be able to keep up with him when he's flying, but he will commend the effort

He does expect your wings to be in peak condition; they're one of your defining features and something that he see as putting you above the rest of your species

If you're at all self conscious about your wings, he scoffs and tells you to take pride in what sets you apart. It's not great advice, but it's something

Soundwave

Enjoys running his fingers through your feathers if you'll let him

Despite being in a relationship, he's still got a job to do. If you're up for it, he'll ask you to do recon or survey areas that need to be scouted in a more subtle way

He's not above using your humanity for the benefit of the Decepticons, but he wouldn't knowingly put you in harms way

Of the four, he's got the easiest time helping you groom your wings due to how thin his digits are

He draws comparisons between you and Laserbeak at times, though he does keep those thoughts to himself

Shockwave

Dude has got plans and ploys in place to test things and ideas

At times it might feel like you're more an experiment than a partner

He's always more than happy to run tests on how far you can fly and how fast, how much weight you can carry and for how long/far

He's also rather interested in your biology, pulling up diagrams of a typical human body and comparing it to yours, trying to figure out why you're different

It might be hard to notice, but he's more careful when it comes to tests. It's one of the few ways he has to show he does actually care about you, and doesn't want to see you hurt if it can be avoided

If there's something you want to train towards physically, you can count on him to come up with the most optimal training program possible

He finds it helpful to have you in the lab and having you zip around and collecting tools for him so he doesn't have to step away from his work

He understands the concept of keeping muscles strong, and makes sure you exercise enough if you're keeping him company in the lab

Knock Out

Dude makes sure you know how pretty your wings are

Makes sure you've got every product you'd ever need to keep them in top condition. Don't ask where he got them from tho

Schedules regular sessions where the two of you just preen and gossip

Also finds it super helpful that you can just fly up and reach the spots he can't and buff them out for him

Absolutely admires the strength you have in your wings. The idea that you have to actually flap them and have enough strength to get yourself off the ground is foreign to him as it's super different for Cybertronians

Not a fan of molting tbh. There's feathers everywhere and guh they're everywhere

Will still (reluctantly) help you deal with it tho

Knock Out makes sure you know he thinks that your wings make you much cooler than other people, and is not above making fun of the Autobots for having 'inferior' humans on their side

#transformers #transformers x reader #transformers prime #tfp #transformers headcanon #maccadam #megatron #tfp megatron #megatron x reader #soundwave #tfp soundwave #soundwave x reader #shockwave #tfp shockwave #shockwave x reader #knockout #tfp knock out #knockout x reader

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obscure-imaginations · 4 days

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Decepticons as cats. SFW, under the cut for space.

Megatron: Longhair gray maine coon who demands grooming. Too proud to let you cuddle him... most times. Will dig at the food container when hungry. You get him a grand cathouse- and he chooses to sleep in a box too small for him. Only enjoys catnip toys. Always tries to fight stray cats through the glass doors.

Starscream: Orange and white jerk cat who pushes stuff off of shelves, tables, etc when you don't pay attention to him. Zoomies come accompanied with loud and long yowling. Has to occasionally have a cone because he overgrooms due to stress... will bite in protest. Demands attention then suddenly wants to play. Isn't neutered.

Dialogue courtesy of @starscrumpt : "If you do not pick me up and cuddle me within thirty seconds, I will push this mug off this table and it will shatter upon impact! I know this is your favorite mug, and you'll never be able to use it again!!"

Soundwave: Tuxedo who's mostly quiet. You think he's a boy until he suddenly has kittens, then you accept him as a trans boy who now has a bunch of sons- how are the kittens so chaotic when their father is so calm? He will steal things to give to the kittens. Sleeps next to your pillow with one eye on the kits. Always brings the babies to you when busy. Likes watching ASMR videos with you.

Blitzwing: Bengal cat who goes from 0 to 100 in a split second. Sleeping one second, zoomies in the next. Sleeps on your face whenever possible. Goes insane for canned food. Will fight you for butter. Likes water. Demands to drink your cereal milk. Cuddles then sudden attack!! Loafs and stares at the ghosts in every room- growls when you try to stop him. Collects socks.

Shockwave: Sphynx. Spends most of his time on a cat shelf, judging everyone. Stares out the window, planning demise for the birds and squirrels. Chronically tries to escape to the great outdoors... but freezes in the backyard (easy to grab him and drag him back indoors). Tends to try to jump on things but fails and lands facefirst on the floor.

Lugnut: Huuuuuge gray cat. Likes to watch the TV. Always guilty when he gets in trouble. Loud meows. Gets his head stuck in things all the time. Cat no like banana. Scared of the printer. Tries to groom Megatron but Megatron bites him :(

Blackarachnia: The spider that Shockwave brought in after an escape attempt. Blitzwing plays with her until Soundwave's kittens eat her. [Sorry if you're a Blackarachnia fan. I do not like her, for her actions against my boi Blitzwing. There is a bias here]

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tireddal · 7 months

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TFP!Soundwave x Cybertronian!Reader (G/N) with oversensitive audials

--- before war ---

• having sensible audils always has been a trouble for you;

• you were able to hear almost anything – ordinary gossips, howls of pain from gladiator's rings, pumping of energon throughout whole Cybertron, Council discussions, but also sounds from other planets and living creatures. First time it was rough, as you tried to assist anyone who managed to croak a quiet plead for a help. Moreover, listening to whimpers and painful groans all the time hadn't done to you any good;

• so you decided to block your audials at all. working as a tech meant having ability to get written instructions, active communication wasn't necessary while you've been repairing gadgets. Audio plugs hadn't solved problem fully, but other bots' talking was like a constant whisper, not a deafening roar as before;

• than you met Sentinel. You had never expected someone as respectable to take even a glimpse at you, ordinary clerk from small workshop;

• at least working under his authority wasn't too bad. Sentinel requested from you espionage work and in return provided you with soundproof quarters, audials' plugs and any necessary supplies;

• his secretary - Soundwave, was the only one who decided to get acquainted with you beside work terms. You interpreted his actions as an attempt to become more successful in executing tasks as you were both working with espionage –

• or maybe, you just had accidentally saved one of his minibots, who was buried under ship's debris on the mission and struggled until you hadn't tracked his quiet whispers for help;

• friendship between you two had been building slowly. At first, you hadnt listened to him in attempt to ignore any loud noises – but Soundwave, needless to say, was (unexpectedly) extremely gentle with his voice while speaking to you as other Cybertronians always shouted and didn't care about your audials. Being an expert with sound, Soundwave knew how much you were hurt from hearing everything on Cyberton and above it. Soundwave had spent almost three cycles gathering information about your sensitivity, and with which noise level you'll be convenient;

• his amount of knowledge about your comfortable hearing was shocking to you – other cons had never shown any interest in you because of your created "deafness", but Soundwave showed you somewhat of respect, gaining your trust by small steps and infinite patience, not getting annoyed when you've forgotten to turn off audials' plugs;

• the wariness hadn't left you immediately. Soundwave was a great spy as Sentinel wasn't a simpleton, so believing velvet mech at once would be self-destructive decision. However, Soundwave hadn't tried to hurt you at all, only speaking quietly enough for you to be comfortable, or sometimes even reassuring and supporting you when espionage work became too stressful;

--- while war ---

• you had thought a lot about joining the Autobots. They might be not the best side, but few of them often hadn't interfered in fights, so it was absolutely a thing which you had desired for a long time while working with Sentinel. He had been patient with yours audio problems, yet never offered you to be out of the battle if there had been one;

• you've been convinced by Soundwave to stay with Decepticons. He persuaded you that Megatron soonly would become a winner, so you must be with them, but deeply inside Soundwave just can't lose you after losing every minibot except Laserbeak. To him, the last minicon and you are a reminder of calm and peaceful life on Cybertron;

• Soundwave is still the only true friend of yours. You are in good relationships with other mechs like Knock Out or Dreadwing, but they still seem not as caring as communications officer. Sometimes they try to talk quietly, but forget about it often. Not the reason to blame, however - Soundwave has spent with you a lot of time, so he's much more adjusted to your features;

• he's jealous when other mechs talk to you without due respect. In his opinion they're annoying and have no concern about your audials in the same way as himself, also they even bother you with matters outside the job;

• Soundwave almost hates Starcream. Air commander may be a great strategist (rarely), but usually Seeker rises volume of his voice, which is unpleasant not only for you, but other Cons as well;

• you engage in fights only when Soundwave is able to assist you. For Megatron, your ability to hear anything is a great weapon against Autobots, and there's no reason not to use it. However, Soundwave had made attempts to persuade Decepticon's leader to exclude you from battles at all. Although fighting alongside Soundwave is comfortable – jet takes attackers on himself and leaves you to gather information and espionage from distance. Also, there is always a Laserbeak who's ready to protect you from intruders.

#soundwave transformers #transformers prime #tfp x reader #tfp headcanons #soundwave tfp #soundwave x reader #soundwave #transformers

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spiritshaydra · 7 months

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lmao made a fullbody flatcolor reference of Sweeb so it’d be easier for me to color him consistently 😭 (still gotta finish the version with Laserbeak docked tho-)

Also we had an annular solar eclipse at 90% totality earlier today which was metal as hell??

#my art #fanart #tfp #transformers #tranformers prime #maccadams #maccadam #tfp soundwave #tfp soundwave headcanons #tfp headcanons #flatcolor reference #decepticons #mecha #digital art #procreate #science fiction #sci fi

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showstopper35 · 1 year

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TFP Cons Reacting To You Calling Them Pretty

a/n: I am taking my friend’s advice and channelling my depression into art. If this can even be called “art”.

Not A Communist ™️

Lieutenant Noodle Digits

#1 Mean Girls Fan

The Crab From Moana

The Con’s Only Himbo

Scott Summers (Cyclops)

Creepy Crawley

DreadRedRedemtionWing

Toothless on Steroids

#tfp #transformers prime #tf #transformers #transformers x reader #Tfp headcanons #tf headcanons #transformers headcanons #megatron #decepticons #decepticons x reader #Tfp cons #tfp decepticons #decepticon headcanons #soundwave #shockwave #starscream

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enmusthighs · 7 months

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Random Transformers Prime headcanon:

When getting around earth music, Megatron kinda gravitated towards songs that were raging against being treated like objects or slaves and being silenced. One day Soundwave is just kinda like “why is your playlist 90% angry feminist music?” And Megatron is like “how the hell was I supposed to know they were all female 🤨”

For those wondering the other 10% is all My little Pony songs.

#transformers #tfp #transformers prime #tfp megatron #transformers prime megatron #transformers prime soundwave #tfp headcanons #transformers headcanons

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errolluck · 9 days

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While I write my next fanfic, I thought it would be nice to share some of my...

MegaSound headcanons!

♡ Not officially married, but they are the embodiment of an old couple that has been together for over 50 years.

♡ They sleep on the same berth.

♡ Soundwave always wakes up first, grabs some energon cubes for him and Megatron and wakes up his husband to have breakfast together before leaving to do their duties.

♡ Sometimes, when Soundwave is working, Megatron just lays his head on him in silence to make him company.

♡ Soundwave records almost everything they do and plays the clips to himself everytime he feels lonely.

♡ Usually Megatron is the big spoon and Soundwave the small spoon when cuddling because of their size and built difference, but sometimes Soundwave likes to be the one to cuddle Megatron when the warlord has a hard day. Visual representation of everytime Soundwave tries that:

♡ Megatron didn't know how to be affectionate with Soundwave at the beginning, so he would pat him in the head to show his love to him.

♡ Megatron purrs when he is extremely happy. Guess who is the only one who knows that.

♡ They both love music and Soundwave has a playlist of Megatron's favorite songs.

♡ Most of the time, Megatron has a light sleep, waking up at the minimal sound. But when he recharges near Soundwave, nothing can wake him up.

I have more headcanons, but those are all the ones I'll share in this post ;)

#transformers #transformers prime #transformers headcanons #megasound #megatron #soundwave #tfp megatron #tfp soundwave #tfp megasound #tfp headcanons #They are consuming my brain #MegaSound is consuming me #nobody help me #Feel free to ask me if you want to know more headcanons I have of them :)

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weenwrites · 10 months

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Cooking A Meal: Part 2

Summary - You ask one of the cons to cook you a meal, but honestly it goes about as well as you'd expect. Characters - Megatron, Shockwave, Starscream, Soundwave, Dreadwing, Knockout, Breakdown, Airachnid, Predaking, Darksteel, Skylynx Content - Crack Category - Headcanons Trigger Warnings - None

✎ A/N: This is an un-revised shitpost, not something too serious.

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

Megatron

Don't even bother having him try to cook you something, he can't cook at all. More often than not he'll just send some vehicon off to fetch you a meal, but when he's actually put in a kitchen and told to cook a meal, he'll probably serve you a plate of charred... Stuff.

It reeks and honestly you can't even tell what it used to be. The most he knows about cooking is that humans always heat up their food. He doesn't know how cooked a piece of meat or a slice of bread has to be, and despite knowing how useful patience is, he can't bring himself to wait a couple minutes for a slice of bread to turn golden brown.

Even with some instructions he doesn't understand a single word on that page. What does "fold in the cheese" even mean?! All in all, the food tastes awful, the presentation is awful, and it's not even a nice experience, he somewhat cleans his mess, but still, it's an awful experience. Even your local fast food restaurant would serve something better than what he could make you.

Shockwave

He wouldn't be too bad at cooking... However the meal he's served you is most likely made from some artificial substitute... It's not bad, per say, and it has a higher nutritional value than everything in your kitchen combined, but... He didn't stand in a kitchen to make it, he stood in a lab and fabricated it. That aside, it's plain and has a bit of a weird taste, the presentation sucks, and it's not naturally made, it was fabricated in a laboratory. It counts as science. Not cooking. So nevermind, he'd be bad at cooking.

But if he were to cook, he'd get into the technicalities of all, and spout food science facts at you. He'd tell you all about how proteins in meat force out moisture through coagulation, and that's how meat cooks. Or how amino acids and simple sugars are rearranged to change the color of meat as it cooks. Unless you know about food science yourself, all it may sound like some scientific garble to you. Whether you implore him to continue or not is all up to you.

But just because he knows about the chemical composition of a cracker doesn't mean he knows how to make things taste good. He chooses things based on their nutritional value, not their taste. Everything from meal portions, to seasonings, to even the temperature it was cooked at is all carefully measured to ensure that you're getting your healthy fill of nutrients. He doesn't even allow you to season it afterwards, because any more seasoning would disturb the healthy balance.

Still, while it may be nutritious, it certainly isn't delicious, but at least it's 100% edible and extremely healthy.

Starscream

He didn't know humans cooked their food, he thought they just ate it as is. So you'll have to explain a lot of stuff to him before either of you actually get anywhere. But once he gets the basics down, he'll be off to a rough, yet good start!

He's very particular about the way things are organized in a kitchen, and he'll get real annoyed if you moved something like a spatula or a spoon he was using. He's sorta set up this organization system in the kitchen that works specifically for him and no one else. While it may look like a mess on the outside, it works really well for him.

He'd never touch raw meat, even if it were to cook for you. He just hates the feeling, so you'd basically have no luck at getting him to scrub a chicken down with salt and seasoning unless you gave him a pair of gloves or a brush. But even if he's a bit squeamish, he's very thorough with his work, and very patient too. But he does complain about how long it takes for things to prepare things and then cook.

Might be a bit burnt here, and a bit bland over there, but if you pick some parts out and sprinkle some salt, pepper, spice, or hot sauce on it, it makes for a solid-ish meal! Which is pretty impressive, given the fact he once knew nothing about cooking a few hours ago.

Soundwave

They're actually a really good chef, better than everyone else, that's for sure. Soundwave knows where and how to learn what he needs to know, so it wouldn't take long for him to research and grasp the bare bones of cooking. And after a couple of tries, they could definitely whip you up a 5 star meal that tastes like something the best chef in the world would make.

It's almost scary how fast he learns, but hey at least you're getting like one of the best meals in the world using cheap ingredients from your fridge. Like who knew ketchup could taste so good in place of fancy marinara sauce!

And because of the amazing meal he made, it's without a doubt that he is the undisputed best chef aboard the Nemesis and everybody else's skills immediately pale in comparison. If it were a competition, it would've been over the moment they joined.

Dreadwing

Like almost everyone on this list, he has no idea what to do, and he has no idea what humans eat, so it ends up being a bit of a lecture before he actually starts cooking. It might take him a bit, and he'll stumble here and there, but he's always quick to ask good questions to ensure he has a solid grasp on what he needs to do.

He's quick to pick up anything you teach him, like about cutting vegetables, or seasoning meals, temperature, et cetera. And in a while, he's able to follow a recipe rather well, only occasionally coming to you to ask a question about what "folding" or "basting" or "al dente" means.

He'd serve you a pretty solid meal all in all. But on the off-chance that what he made for you had caused you to get sick, he'd immediately and sincerely apologize to you, and most likely never make you a meal ever again.

Knockout

He has some knowledge around human cooking thanks to the internet, and it helps the slightest bit, but for the most part he'll be bugging you with all his questions about human cuisine and cooking.

And all the while he's cooking, he'll ask you to fetch him things like that kitchen knife over there, or that measuring cup—no, not that one. That one was used for wet ingredients, he needs the other one that was used for dry ingredients, now chop chop. The clock's ticking. Or he'll holler at you to come and help hold the bowl as he scrapes the mixture into another pan.

Surprisingly, the kitchen actually remains rather nice and orderly throughout it all. He fills your sink with water and just leaves the dirty dishes in there to soak, and cleans messes the instant they're made, which greatly helps with clean-up afterward! But he won't touch the dishes. He just hates the feeling of scrubbing grimy food off, so you're on your own unless you give him a pair of gloves.

But as for the food itself? It's... Semi-decent! He may have burned it a little, or messed up one of the steps, but it still tastes good and it's still edible. He even decorates it nicely! He'd chop any vegetables into cute little shapes, and he has a good eye for presentation. So it's pretty nice.

Breakdown

He doesn't know anything about human cooking. He does question where the heck human food comes from though, and the most he knows is that humans consume other organisms, which he finds really weird. So in the beginning, the whole cooking session might be more of an educational session than anything, but only so he understands what humans can eat and what he should be doing.

He technically doesn't do any cooking since he just makes you things like instant noodles or instant mac n' cheese. But he'll need a bit of supervising because with the noodles, he'll put the seasoning packet in the water while the noodles are cooking, and then drain the noodles because he thought that the noodles would absorb the flavor (same goes for the mac n' cheese), but it turns out that the cheese water just goes down the drain. So it technically isn't completely his fault that the food may taste off (because instant food doesn't always taste that good...) but he does mess some of the steps up which contributes to that.

But with a little guidance here, and a little trial and error there, he'll actually be able to whip up something pretty decent using the instant stuff as a base! He'll add things like chopped up vegetables or spice for some flavor in some instant ramen, or cook the macaroni in milk and add some mustard for mac n' cheese, or perhaps crack an egg and add some garlic into some insta-soup.

All in all, it's a pretty solid meal for his first time cooking. But does it really technically count as cooking if he used an already pre-made thing to make it?

Airachnid

If she didn't care about you as much as she does, she would've fed you something poisonous if she didn't ignore your request first. She's... A questionable cook... To say the least, but one thing's for sure, all the meat she uses in her cooking is fresh. And I mean fresh as in "she dragged that animal into the kitchen and slaughtered it on the spot" kind of fresh, which is ideal if you're eating something that requires super fresh meat like oysters.

She doesn't burn the food, but she most likely under-cooks it. As for seasoning, well, she doesn't add any, so whatever you're eating will need a whole lot of salt, pepper, and spices either to taste like something, or to distract from the horrible taste the food already has.

But while the food may taste weird, the presentation's interesting. It's something of an art, made from something you don't even think you can call "food" anymore, but it's interesting to look at.

All in all, the food tastes horrible, the presentation's neat, and you're 100% guaranteed to get food poisoning if you scarf the entire meal down (which you won't, the stench is bad enough to kill even flies).

Predaking

He can't cook at all—actually, he doesn't even know what humans eat, so you'll have to explain to him quite a lot. Even then, he'll probably just bring you a dead animal and assume that's enough. You'll actually have to lecture him on cooking meat, preparing ingredients, and whatnot. So this whole thing turns into a cooking lesson as opposed to doing actual cooking.

He soaks all that knowledge up like a sponge, and with his newfound knowledge of cooking he's able to make something relatively decent for you, if not leaning more towards mediocre! The meal is something simple, probably from a cookbook you have at your house (or on the internet...)

All in all, while it's below average, it's probably above-par by your standards, given the fact you just taught him how to cook a hot second ago. The presentation is simple, the food actually tastes good, so all in all it's a pretty average meal.

Darksteel

Surprise, surprise! He is the worst cook out of them all. And here you might have thought that Predaking or Airachnid would've been the worst, but nope. It's him. He'd most likely burn your kitchen down, if not trash everything you have, and waste everything you have in your fridge. The best he does is bring you a dead animal that he "cooked" by spewing fire at it. Then again it's most likely either overcooked or undercooked and would definitely give you trichinellosis, E. coli, BSE, salmonella, or whatever other horrible disease you risk contracting by eating what he's served you.

But what about vegetables? He doesn't even know what a vegetable is, and unless you give him a really thorough description of what counts as a vegetable or not, he'd most likely just uproot a tree or pluck a bush out from the ground and give it to you, mildly scorched, because he remembered that you have to cook it.

If you were to ask him about presentation, he'd probably pose the scorched cattle or chicken he got his claws on, set the crisp "vegetables" upright, and think that's good enough "presentation".

Bottom line? Do not eat anything he gives you, it'll absolutely destroy your stomach.

Skylynx

Yeah he doesn't want to. He'd hate cooking so much because everything takes so long to do! He's sensible enough to do some research and learn, or ask you questions for clarification, but waiting for water to boil just drives him crazy.

He tries to work diligently and be patient, but you might catch him cutting corners a little bit. How so? Well, he'd raise the temperature of the stove to get something to cook faster, or if he needs to carefully ground something into a poultice, he'll just smush it into paste. If you're having something simple like mashed potatoes, then he has absolutely no problem preparing that.

He doesn't pay much attention to how it looks, so while the food he serves looks unappetizing as he straight up slaps it onto your plate, it actually tastes pretty decent... Ish... Decent-ish. Sure your food may have come out a bit burnt, or you might find some weird chunks in it, but it's better than what Darksteel has to offer, that's for sure.

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bots-and-cons · 4 months

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Knockout, Breakdown and Soundwave x reader that has self healing abilities. Basically she could lose an arm and then within the hour it’s showing signs of growing back or maybe she loses the entire lower half of her body but she’s just acting like it’s another Tuesday.

How do you think they would react?

Uuu this sounds fun, just another spark attack for the cons. I ended up watching Deadpool while writing this so this might be kind of inspired by that. I didn’t do Breakdown, just didn’t feel like it and I just wanted to post something

Warnings: Gore-ish description of injury?

~Soundwave~

•When you got hurt, he was understandably pretty freaking shocked

•He didn’t even really get upset at first, because he was in too much of a shock

•He just stood there looking down at your body that had somehow gotten cut in half

•Your lower body was thrown in one direction and your upper body in another

•Soundwave just glanced between the two parts a couple of times, before the realization started to settle in

•But then the top part of you pushed itself up with its arms

•You pretty much went like “Ow!” very overdramatically and pushed yourself into an upward position

•That’s when Soundwave noticed there was very little blood and that you didn’t really seem very bothered by the whole thing

•He scooped you up and hurried to get you away from the fighting, picking up your lower body in the process too

•He was obviously quite distressed, seeing you so hurt, but you didn’t seem panicked or in pain

•You notice his panic and start calming him down, telling him you’re okay and that you’ll heal

•Soundwave is pretty confused, because he thought humans were very fragile and easy to hurt/kill

•You ask him to just take you back to the Nemesis and that you’ll explain everything to him once he’s not in danger because of you distracting him

•When you get back to the Nemesis you’ve already started regenerating, it’s honestly a bit disturbing, because it looks like you have the legs of a toddler

•You sit one the berth and you’ve wrapped yourself in a blanket as to not get cold, your pants are a bit big on your toddler legs

•Soundwave is understandably pretty weirded out but he’s just glad you’re not dead

•He can’t get the image of your cut in half body out of his head for a long while, it’s kind of traumatizing for him to be honest

~Knockout~

•Knockout was understandably very upset when you got your arm cut off when he got attacked by the autobots

•You didn’t really seem to mind though, but he was on the verge of tears as he tried to figure out what to do

•You just told him to stop panicking and take a good look at your arm

•He stops panicking for just a moment and looks at your arm, it’s not bleeding and even though it’s now a stump, it looks healed?

•You tell him it’s gonna be just fine in a couple of hours and that it’s going to grow back

•He’s obviously quite confused, because that’s not supposed to happen, right?

•But would you look at that, it’s slowly growing back, first it’s like a baby hand, then like a child’s and finally it’s back to being the way it was before

•Knockout is obviously weirded out by this, since he’s never seen anything like it before

•And he’s seen a lot of weird stuff, even by his standards

•He doesn’t know any other humans, so he can’t say it’s wrong exactly, but he’s pretty sure it’s not how that’s supposed to work

•He’s of course never seen you or another human injured before, so he doesn’t really have comparison point

#transformers #tfp #transformers prime #decepticons #soundwave #knockout #tfp headcanons #reader insert #tfp x reader #transformers x reader

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