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zuzu-draws · 18 days

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So after the spoilers for Chap 257 dropped, I saw some tweets clarifying the meaning of the Kanji Sukuna used in the chapter when referring to his mother, and the overall reveals in the chapter got me thinking.

I’m making this post as a way of gathering my thoughts, personal speculations and where I think all of this connects to Sukuna’s character and the information Gege has given us over the years. Nothing I say is by any means new information, but like I said, I’m just collecting my thoughts here. By the way, just a warning, this post contains SPOILERS for the JJK Manga! If you don’t like that, please don’t read this!

Something I’ve noticed is that the theme of “Hunger” and symbolism of “Cooking/Food” is heavily referenced with Sukuna throughout the Manga. Gege in a previous Fanbook has disclosed Sukuna’s favorite Hobby to be “Eating”.

This theme is again very much ingrained within Sukuna’s cursed techniques and even his Domain Expansion, the “Malevolent Shrine”. With his two main techniques being “Dismantle” and “Cleave” are cutting-type attacks. He is also able to use a Flame-Arrow, and Fire is essential for making Food. The Shrine in his Domain Expansion literally has mouths on all sides, looking eager to chew down anything in-front of them!

This symbolism also heavily influences Sukuna’s own manner of speech, and the way he speaks to other characters in the series as well. With his post-fight chat with Jogo before his death, Sukuna mentions Jogo lacking the “Hunger” to take control of his desires, preventing him from reaching the heights of Gojo Satoru. Before the Start of their fight in Shinjuku, Sukuna called Gojo a “Nameless Fish on top of his cutting board”, and that he was going to start by “Peeling off the scales”(refering to Gojo’s infinity). There’s also further symbolism that supports this by analyzing the Kanji and meaning of Sukuna’s “Malevolent Shrine” but I’m not very educated on that so I won’t be opening that point here.

What all of this points to is that Eating and Food……is extremely important to Sukuna, to the point that it literally affects him in manners innumerable.

Eating is an instinct, a necessity for the survival of every single living being.

And In the face of extreme Hunger and starvation, even those with the strongest will could lose their Humanity and revert to the basic animalistic side of their existence. (The Heian Period also had a Famine, although I believe the timing to be a bit off, but do with this info as you see fit)

In JJK Chapter 257, it is revealed to us that Sukuna and his Twin were most likely starving in the womb of their starving mother.

On the brink of starvation, Sukuna had to consume his “other self”(his twin), so that he could survive.

Btw, this tweet and this thread gives additional characterisation to Sukuna:

Link to the original thread: Link.

More context (and reactions :P):

Link to original thread: Here

This reveals to us that indeed, Sukuna was born a twin. And as we all know, “Twins” are seen with extreme scrutiny in Jujutsu Society, they’re not well liked. This too in a period where Cursed Spirits and Jujutsu Sorcery was at its peak, it is not far-fetched to assume that his Mother may not have been treated very well by the people in her surroundings, especially as she bore twins.

When Kashimo asks if Sukuna was born the Strongest or if he made himself the Strongest, this is the response Sukuna gave to him:

When you think about it, how do you think the people around them would have reacted when the woman: who was supposed to birth two twins, gave birth to a single child instead? and that child had consumed his other twin in the womb itself?

No doubt people would’ve been horrified, disgusted and even revulsed. With the woman and her newborn child.

This would’ve led to their further ostracisation in the already very close-minded society. Unable to fend for herself and her newborn child, it must’ve been difficult for Sukuna’s mother to survive. I feel like somewhere along the line, Sukuna was left alone to fend for himself at an extremely young age. To protect himself from both Curses and Society alike.

This is why I believe Sukuna knows what true starvation, weakness and hunger feels like. Both in the emotional and literal sense. He was left without another person caring about him or his well-being, in a cut-throat period where it was “Fight or be killed”.

Powerful curses roamed all across Japan, nowhere was safe. Simply be strong, or you'll die. There's no room for weakness. And initially, a kid!Sukuna was weak, as anyone would be in the beginning when they're just starting out in this world. (and maybe, he didn't have much to eat, leading to long periods of starvation? :') )

I believe it is this debilitating hunger, and feeling of weakness that eventually led to Sukuna’s current Hedonistic mindset.

He’s essentially traumatised by it, and believes that it was his own weakness that led him to experience this sheer starvation. That he deserved to feel this way because he was weak then. Perhaps, the people around him were right, that as long as they have the power and strength to overcome anything, they’re free to do as they please; And there is nothing anyone else could do about it.

I feel like the irony here is that Sukuna himself, must’ve been a “weakling” before eventually rising the ranks to become History’s Strongest Sorcerer. This is also why he values Strength so much.

Ultimately, Sukuna has decided that there was nothing more important than being strong enough to fulfill your own desires. And “eating” is one of his most important desires. It’s his favourite thing to do, the one he derives the most pleasure out of. And like an animal, whose main focus is to consume, consume and consume. He too, simply consumes.

Most morals likely have no meaning to him. He doesn’t care who he hurts, what he does, as long as he’s able to get what he wants. And this isn’t limited to eating.

This is why people referring to Sukuna as a “Natural Disaster” is so befitting of him. Because Natural Disasters also don’t care about what or who they’re destroying, they just come and go, wreaking havoc appropriate for their nature and magnitude.

I believe Sukuna himself has said lines similar in nature, when talking to Kashimo:

Now I’m not sure how Sukuna perceives or even experiences this “Love”, because I think he has a rather very warped idea of it. I do think that this definition of love is similar to the one that Gojo also understands, but I don’t think he knows what “love” truly is. I’m not sure how I could comment on this, but I do think that Sukuna’s emotionally starved, whether he realises that or not.

Because, like Kashimo himself asked Sukuna “What is the point of dividing your soul into 20 different parts and then traversing across time if you’re satisfied with this?” we do not know the answer to that yet.

But many people have speculated that “Black Box” panels in JJK manga represent a curse (either self-inflicted or put by someone) on the speaker. Like, take a look over here where Sukuna reiterates the same dialogue, except it looks like he’s trying to reassure himself:

This once again shows that Sukuna has only ever strived for himself, in the same hedonistic fashion, to a very very extreme degree. It is possible that he's been lacking something, and he himself does not realise that he’s lacking it. Maybe it was this subconscious feeling, that led to Sukuna agreeing to Kenjaku’s plan of dividing his soul into 20 different parts, and to traverse across time as a Cursed Object.

Sukuna’s an incredibly complex character, and I’m excited to see where this goes. Gege has put extra care in the way he characterizes and depicts Sukuna, and again, I’m really sad that a lot of that characterization gets lost in translation. Still, I’m going to try my best to understand and get the most accurate feel of his character as I possibly can.

If you made it this far, Thank you for reading! And if you would like, please do leave a comment in the tags or replies because I would love to read what other people think of this and just Sukuna in general. I do not see a lot of people doing critical analysis of him, and a lot of his actions are seemingly swept under the rug. I don’t like that, so hopefully this contributes to people focusing more on Sukuna and his character. (/^v^)/ <3

#ryomen sukuna #jjk sukuna #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #sukuna #king of curses #heian era #character analysis #manga #jjk manga #jjk 257 #this is...so very long omg im sorry for my huge word vomit #like 1.4k works but i really did felt like i wanted to gather my scattered thoughts into one place and kind of make the connections #not sure if anyone is gonna read this but if they do #thanks for reading! be sure to let me know what u think!#i just love psycho-analysis of my fav characters and being able to really understand the essence of their characters #their emotions their motivations and to finally be able to do that with Sukuna and reading what everyone else have to say about it ahhh #im super excited! We're finally getting close to the Heian Backlore!! rejoice!!#my gut always did tell me he was a tragic character T_T and now we're finally getting the tid bits #also apologies for adding different panels #but i only added the translations i liked #i don't like J*hn W*rry's translation like yuck #so ima wait for Lightning's translation notes~ for further clarifications!

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brain-rot-central · 1 month

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I don't wanna go to work. I just want to write vampire smut, cook good food, and bake bread.

#i seem to only be able to write when I know i don't have the time to write #what the fuck is that about #neech's speeches #i did voice lines with my fiancé last night for his latest yt vid #maybe i should explore cooking on yt #good news is i finally started the actual sex scene this morning #just word vomitted 300+ words worth of smutty tension #jdkanskdk #sorry this is taking me so long #my mind has been a battlefield for the last month #also my work contract is up as of thursday so i have to find another site #i have enough saved to chill for a bit #i probably will #but still #that's stress #plus personal life bs happening ugh #I'm ok just really busy sorry

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cherrirui-official · 5 months

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Friendlocke Violet Gijinkas (Part 3/7)

PART 3 RAAAAGH!!! SO SORRY THIS ONE TOOK SO LONG AAAH!!!! But it's here now, yippee!!! And just in time for Christmas too, wowie!

I plan on posting them in order by groups of three, so there's gonna be seven parts in total, all of which I'll be linking here when done vvv

(Part One) (Part Two) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven)

!! These will contain personal headcanons I have for the cast, little fun facts, and also spoilers for Friendlocke Violet (for both the edited vids and the streams) !!

@saltydkart-reblogs

Designs under the cut!

GRACE:

The light scars/ cracks on her body were injuries formed while she was accidentally sent through Turo's time machine. Unlike the paradox pokemon/ miraidon, GrAce's body isn't made of iron or metal, so her body wasn't able to withstand the large amount of tera energy used to power the machine as easily as the paradox pokemon were.

Luckily, she was just barely able to hold out against the time machine's energy until she made it to Turo's lab in the present day. Unfortunately, she can't be sent back because she would literally die if she went through the time machine again. Sooooo she's stuck in the modern era.

Very familiar with Area Zero and the various pokemon that reside down there, but moved out in order to continue producing music as well as familiarize herself with current-day Paldea.

She only vaguely know Clavell back when he was a rebellious teenager, though she didn't know his name. Clavell, on the other hand, was one of her biggest fans back in the 50s-60s.

Funny enough, when she sees "Clive" for the first time, she recognizes him! But not as Director Clavell, she just barely recognizes him as the random teenage fan that would occasionally ask her to sign various GrAce posters he had bought. She is also under the belief that he too, was sent from the past into the present, unaware that he simply just grew up.

Likes doing random poses for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

BRAIDY:

Believes that everything can be solved without violence, but can and will throw hands if need be.

Everyone in Braidy's family greet each other by playfully ramming into one another. So when Peppy and his team were getting chased down by Braidy's family during their journey, they weren't trying to attack them, they just wanted to say hi!

Braidy is really good with kids due to his experience with being the eldest sibling, as he'd often have to take care of his younger siblings.

Mykyie and Braidy shop at the same clothing store.

Speaking of Mykyie, the lighter parts of Braidy's fur appeared only after Mykyie passed...

As of now, he's still an apprentice, but he has great potential to become an all powerful wizard... someday.

CHRISTENE'S:

Artist's note: I couldn't fit their children in the bio sorry girls and gays. I'll probably draw them out later on after I'm finished with everyone else.

Their stomachs are basically voids, so every time they eat the food just disappears, which is why they're ALWAYS hungry.

HIGHLY flammable.

It is speculated that they're poppets, but you don't have any proof of that, do you?

If you listen closely, you can hear soft bell noises every time they walk. It is unknown why this happens, but I believe it is best not to ask.

Aaaaand that's it! I plan on taking a short break from these bc I wanna draw some other stuff. Dw, I'll continue to work on these very soon!

#You guys will never guess who's lore I spent the most time on...#A knee ways... sorry for the word vomit in GrAce's funfacts I just really like the lore I came up with for her #time traveling bird just hit different ig #Also if anyone has noticed: Yes I changed the spoiler warning image on the previous post #Having the same image on both posts was starting to confuse me a bit so I made a different one for that post as well as one for this post #I hope you like the lil Peppys i drew for each one lol #lil guys... look at them go!#again. sorry these took so long yall I got caught up with life and other stuff and yaknow what? That happens sometimes and its ok.#but I got these done in time for christmas! So ig this is my Christmas gift to yall haha #Merry Christmas yall!#cherris canvas #saltydkdan #friendlocke #friendlocke violet #violet gijinka au #also just noticing this but the quality is better if u click on the image bc sometimes it looks like i drew this on 144p u get what i mean?

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decapodparty · 1 year

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jokes aside i always thought it was worth noting that the second dean found real bonds outside of his family he pretty much gave up sex when on screen (until he was a demon but thats a whole can of worms). the moment a steady cast of supporting characters comes in, dean drops the womanizer act like it was burning him up. for simplicity’s sake id say the first long-lasting supporting character we get that isn’t familial would be cas, and sometime around season 5 we no longer see dean hopping bars, bragging about what he’ll do that night. there’s obviously slice girls (s7), but aside from that iirc the only times dean is in a bar, it’s to talk or to drink. as the seasons go on and we collect a small cast of semi-longstanding allies who aren’t even implied to be romantic interests (jody, charlie, kevin, garth, etc), dean’s supposedly salacious nature disappears like it never existed. he makes jokes sometimes but, really, from what i remember, any pursuit of a night out with a stranger is pretty much eviscerated from any on-screen dialogue as early as s5 or 6.

and THEN to open the demon dean ordeal- it’s really interesting that the moment he drops his connections, he goes back to his early season tendencies. it feels like with him, he either has sex or personal bonds, and when friends appear sex is dropped pretty much entirely. personally i choose to interpret it as dean preferring fulfillment from close bonds, and not truly caring for sex as much as the viewer is led to believe.

#okay gang heres how asexual dean can still win #his general disinterest in dating could also be used to make points for aro dean too #also i want to note that rufus is actually the first non familial support we see #but hes a little bit outside the winchesters direct sphere of socialization #anyways sorry if this is word vomit im so bad at typing #spn #originals

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homielander · 2 months

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the most interesting character detail about maeve through which i have extrapolated at least half my understanding of her is that she prefers to be called maeve. i frequently see "maggie" pop up in meta and fic as her chosen name, but quite literally nobody calls her that, including (and most significantly) elena. elena is maeve's tether to her humanity and her refuge away from vought, yet even elena only ever refers to her as maeve. (and in season 2, we learn that maeve started dating elena before she joined the seven -- before queen maeve's popularity would have become so inescapable that she would feel compelled to introduce herself by that name.) it's especially notable that in her final scene, maeve refers to starlight as annie for only the second time, but she is still called maeve by both annie and elena.

here's what we know about maeve's life as maggie: she had a rocky relationship with her father whom she doesn't seem to speak to anymore, she's from a "cousin-fucker hick town" as described by homelander -- i can't imagine this place being terribly lgbt-friendly, and she generally lacks connection with anyone she would have known before becoming queen maeve. she doesn't have fond memories of this time of her life, and perhaps that extends to all associations with it, including the name maggie.

i tend to think that becoming queen maeve was, in many ways, self-actualizing for her. the act that garners her national attention and earns her a ticket to vought is a heroic one -- she breaks every single bone in her right arm to save a school bus from falling off a bridge. and i know madelyn says she is responsible for the mythos of queen maeve, but this character was still aspirational, and likely someone maeve wanted to live up to. in any case, this new identity gave her a purpose and tools to achieve it: she wanted to help people! by her own admission, maeve enters vought bright-eyed and hopeful, not far off from annie. (maeve is also one of the only supes in the seven not to know about compound v -- she doesn't strike me as religious but believing she's among the very few born with powers would have strengthened her internal drive to be a hero.)

it's for the same reason that i think maeve actually... liked having powers? of course she says otherwise in her last season, but season 3 maeve is cynical and weary from about two decades of dealing with vought and homelander's abuse. they've used her first as the token woman and then the token gay person of the seven. after growing largely passive to the brutality of the job, the flight 37 incident forces her to confront all of the violence she's witnessed and tolerated. she's given pieces of herself away and she loathes the husk of herself that's left. i don't find it surprising that she would want to relinquish every single connection to vought, including her powers.

assuring herself that she will be better off without her powers comes with an added benefit: she gets to distinguish herself from homelander, who would be lost without his powers. and i think she is eager to make this distinction in her mind because there are some uncomfortable similarities between their initiations into vought. the mantle of homelander allows him to exert agency for the first time in his life, just as the mantle of queen maeve endows her with purpose for the first time in hers. (crucially, none of his current circle call him john, either.) they both enjoy being the most powerful superheroes in the world, the unending public adoration, and (in my interpretation) each other. they're also both overwhelmingly lonely and they know it -- homelander teases her multiple times about how she has no friends with a bit more bite in every passing season, while maeve is keenly aware of his isolation and exploits his yearning for love pretty effectively.

maeve steadily grows disillusioned with her position at vought because she still has a moral code, suppressed though it may be. even so, she nearly relents to homelander's vision: that they will be lonely at the top but lonely together. she's pulled out of her miserable state of inaction by annie and elena. annie reminds her of what a hero should be (what she was, once); elena offers her a way out of vought, serving as maeve's light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.

she escapes that tower as maeve, not maggie. she rejects homelander's god complex which engenders his cruelty towards regular people and 'lesser' supes -- no one will call her queen maeve ever again, at least -- but it is still important to her to be a hero, and for better or for worse, she found that as maeve. i feel like she'd struggle to exist without her powers (possibly the self-awareness hasn't settled in yet) for all the reasons mentioned above. i like to think that eventually, she'll circle around to helping people and resisting vought however possible -- albeit on a smaller, more covert scale so she can continue living a peaceful life with elena.

#sorry for this word vomit i have just been thinking about maeve! what's in a name...#motivated by 2 years of reading takes about maeve wanting to be a normie (during s1-3 and prior) that i don't rly agree with #i'm not offering this as the 'right' interpretation of course this is just what makes sense for me!!#i have a couple of things i wanted to add (particularly re: maeve x HL since i know how consensual their relationship was #is controversial and i feel a bit weird slipping in that characterization of it w/o any follow-up)#but for now i am just going to say it fits with how i perceive her character trajectory and leave it there??#because i don't want to disrupt this post my thoughts on that #i also have mixed feelings on her ending but again not the post for it i suppose #queen maeve #the boys #maeve x elena #maeve x homelander #annie x maeve #supe names in this show are interesting... curious to see what they will do w annie next season

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that-was-anticlimactic · 2 years

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yo besties y’all should take the what ninjago character are you quiz that i just made because you love me and i’m funny

#uquiz #ninjago #so sorry to anyone who gets anyone other than kai and lloyd because i gave up on descriptions after that and just word vomited #also it's a horrible quiz but it is my bby now #i have adopted it into my family #i want to pick it up by its collar and shake it a little bit #i just took it and got lloyd and i feel Very called out wow op so rude #his description starts with: 'bestie get some sleep. drink some water.'#tbh i did not think i was going to get lloyd but like... that's fair

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minamotoz · 2 years

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the boy meets world writers creating the most heartbreaking narrative about growing up queer and closeted in 90's you've ever seen (it is entirely through subtext and poorly aged, sorta problematic jokes)

#boy meets world #im sorry im in my shory brainrot era again #i know i literally Never post abt BMW but i cannot stop thinking about this genuinely #i rewatched 4x12 aka the gayest episode and my brain is about to Explode #'its only natural' 'sure......natural' UR JOKING???????????????#theyre so miserable bc of their own comphet yet they just. accept the fact that 'its always been this way and it'll always be this way'#they both long for normalcy and acceptance and they think that being straight is the only way to achieve that HELLO CAN ANYONE HEAR M #like. cory chasing the white picket fence nuclear family fantasy with topanga and shawn chasing what cory and topanga have #bc theyre the most stable parts of his life #and so much of corys interest in girls is entirely reliant on keeping up with shawn #he starts crushing on girls bc shawn does. he starts dating girls bc shawn does. he wants to have sex w topanga bc he thinks shawns done it #FUCKING 'i always thought topanga was the one person i could live without but shes gone and uoure here and im alive so it must be you'#ARE UOU KIDDING ME #*couldnt #im sorry im judt word vomitting i just feel. Insane #this show and this ship make me go a bit cookoo bananas

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pawphin · 5 months

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there is nothing in the world that makes me more neurodivergently happy right now than op 6 of hxh

#everything. EVERYTHING #h-x-h spoilers in tags ehirewhkdljshfulkh lkusfhurhfkjhksf klf reskh glker fsgfhkser <- filler #nksjdfbhlekflkehlkebwlkgfhkwghewilfbgewulgfkldhdbbgfehkvfewbhkeehfvgfhewvfhkeghvewfhkefbgjkewhgefebhwek #okay. kilua walking away form gon and then it showing baby aluka running towardshim. are you JOKING #i waited a bit to watch the op because i didnt want to get spoiled and when i watched that i burst into tears #something about the way gotoh is animated he looks so fucking badass #and then cheadles little grimace. kilua reaching for gons hand. ALUKA AND NANI KA #canary and amane riding together on the grandma mobile #leoriio punching the shit out of the stand #AND THEN THE ANIMATION OF GON AFTER WEHAVENT SEEN HIM FOR LIKE A DOZEN EPISODES #kilua and aluka looking at the world tree.. and hi ging youre there too #sorry i had to worm vomit a little #word. okay. godnight everypony

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rainswept · 18 days

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aventurine + counting backwards - throwing muses

hii. i forgot to post the ask but 💀💀💀 I Did It

anyone else feel free to send me a song + a character and i’ll write a little something for it if i can 🫶

#i also added this to the aven playlist. actually #overall a win in my book #i might write a second one that actually follows the lyrics.#this one.. overall i just.. listened to it while writing. didn’t exactly take too much inspiration #i fear i did not do the song or the lyrics or how it portrays him/how i interpreted it to justice..#the only theme i actually took from it was the i don’t remember him 😭. even then.. didn’t focus on it too much #i kind of just started word vomiting unrelated to the song. HELP SORRY GWEN #i would love to play with the lyrics a bit more.. i kind of just got Swept Away. haha ba dum tss.#so anyway I Don’t Know. Maybe. we’ll see!!

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crows-home · 10 months

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about to have one of the most taxing days tomorrow. nevertheless. we persist gamers 💪

#pobre payasito #i have been... so low energy lately. a lot of things catching up to me. AND with whats happening tomorrow...#i. cannot catch a fucking break.#literally as i was typing this i got hit with another whammy. god fucking damn.#cansado. pinche pobre payasito for real.#im staying positive!!! life is hard!!!!! taxing! shit sucks sometimes!!!!! but im going to live. continue. persist and go through the lows #i need a good cry i think. i should keep writing my fics!!! project and word vomit until something good comes out. im good at that i think!#ahhh. sorry for the rant. its just. if u send me something or if im gone for a bit then please be patient.#this isnt an 'i need my followers to be updated on my personal life i need them to not hate me' post #more like. a heads up. and a thank you! :) genuinely. u guys are nice and this blog really is a bright spot in my day most of the time

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death-himself · 2 months

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I feel like I should stop listening to Lovejoy as a whole, but I need a second opinion because I’m still trying to wrap my head around the situation /gen

(Also sending love to Shelby and the others who were abused, or are being abused)

honestly, it’s perfectly fine to take your time with this

it’s also fine to keep listening to lovejoy if you want, i’m not gonna sit here and pretend i don’t listen to a bunch of problematic and/or downright terrible artists (falling in reverse and msi for ex…) so long as you’re not buying merch or anything there’s nothing wrong with it

wilbur was probably my favorite mcyt, i’m gonna miss his content a lot, but i don’t think i personally will ever be able to watch/listen to anything he creates anymore. if someone acknowledges what he’s done and continues to watch/listen to his stuff, i’m not gonna assume they’re a terrible shitty person. just consume media critically, be aware of who you’re supporting

i never watched much of shelby’s stuff, but i really hope she’s doing alright and knows she has support <3

#idk if this helps or not anon sorry lol #this kinda just became word vomit #i think ppl should just listen to whatever they want #just try and be aware of if they’ve done something shitty #but #wilbur’s music apart from lovejoy might be a bit iffy now #i’ve seen people saying one of his albums is about shubble or someone else he abused so that’s…not great #but keep listening to lovejoy if you want #when in doubt pirate it out

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comraderoscoes · 2 months

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You made a post yesterday about Lewis not acknowledging f1 until Australia and I’ve been thinking about it for a day and a half lmao bc I genuinely didn’t remember that? Like I was depressed when the car launch happened a couple of weeks ago bc he looked so uninterested. No posts about the new car except sharing a couple of photos on the stories, no new helmet launch, no comments about being excited to go racing again at testing (i remember at the beginning of 2021 or 2022 he shared a video of a penguin waddling and jumping around with the caption “that’s me bc I’m about to get in the car again”, it was so cute 😭😭).. and I get it that since the break he’s adopted this new approach of sharing very little on his socials (which I hope doesn’t last very long tbh) but it was very discouraging to see as a fan, especially when I think a lot of us are assuming that the ~atmosphere~ in the merc garage is not the best atm. But if you say that he seemed like this last year as well….. it’s a bit comforting I guess .

iirc he didn’t really post about f1 at all from testing until the australian gp, when he was finally like guys im still an f1 driver and here’s a photo dump 😭

like he was still posting a couple of other things but to me the vibes felt OFF.

but maybe just personally the vibes from bahrain testing last year - australia were some of the most rancid lmao with the w14 turning out to be the w14 and lewis definitely not enjoying bahrain and saudi (i was really questioning whether i could stick it out as well tbh 😭)

the vibes feel better to me this time around! i’m sure the atmosphere in the garage is weird, but he still has his boys around him (bono and mike (bike)) and he has an escape route 🙏🏾 i think the car was just so shit last year and they hadn’t listened to him at all, so i can’t imagine how frustrating it must have been. in general i think his socials are just more minimal now

#ask #anon #bit of word vomit sorry!

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pinkspiraling · 1 year

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can’t imagine how i get out of this or support myself or feel better or stop wanting to die. just can’t picture it at all anymore. i love the sunset i love the feeling of the wind i will miss it one day

#tw suicide #sorry i’m a wee bit drunk lmao. i’m fine i’m just sitting outside and being sad #pink’s word vomiting

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white-weasel · 5 months

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I loved reading about finnean in your tags of that poll reblog. This is your sign, if you want one, to talk about him (or any of your other characters) all you want. Fascinating little guy

Anon you have unleashed the floodgates I think... This is gonna be a mix of general information, campaign recaps related to him, and just general brain rot so uhhhhh who's to say if this will be even remotely intelligible lmao

So like I laid out in the tags of that post, Finnean Galondel is a high elf Order of the Scribes Wizard (currently we're at level 14). He's currently 91 and since elves reach the age of maturity at ~100 at least according to the PHB, I started by playing him as the equivalent of someone going off to college for the first time: very smart, but because he had never traveled very far outside of his village before so kinda naive about how the world actually works. He's certainly matured over the course of the campaign, but he does still tend towards optimistic outlooks

The backstory I originally provided for him was pretty brief. Essentially, Finnean's father had been out of the picture ever since he was 5 years old. Nobody really knows what happened to him. His mother told him that he was a very dedicated scholar, studying magic and history in general, but specializing in one specific area thousands of years old. Then, one night, he apparently stumbled on a huge discovery and told her that he needed to take it to the village elders right away. He left and wasn't back the next morning, the village elders saying that he never even approached them that night. Nobody knows why he decided to leave the village, or if it even was a voluntary decision at all. However, since 85 year had passed since then, Finnean and his mother essentially treated him like he was dead by that point.

And Finnean and his mom!! He is SUCH a mama's boy it's not even funny. Before the campaign, she was his best friend in the world. He loved helping her out around the house and just spending time with her. However, she was the one who pushed Finnean to leave home so that he could branch out in his training. She knew that he was pretty sheltered and needed real world experience if he was to actually improve and become a better wizard like he wanted. I have written multiple letters to my DM in character throughout the campaign for what Finnean was sending to his mom to keep her up to date

There was also Daemaris (hate this fucking bitch) who I originally included as Finnean's childhood bully. He's basically the village golden child who has always outshone Finnean and then rubbed it in his face. He left the village to strike out on his own a couple years before Finnean did and for right now all you need to know is he's an asshole and I hate him ajafsldf (he will become important later tho)

So yeah not to get into the details of everything we did in the first part of the campaign, but we played through the Dragon Heist module with some supplementary side adventures. Here, Finnean gets his first experience with violence and actually taking a life, as everything he's done before has been in controlled environments. He struggled with this for some time, about the realities of adventuring compared to all the books he had read that had made it sort of idyllic and heroic (because of course he's a huge book nerd, he's a wizard)

The thing that kinda makes him come to terms with death and killing is the group's first encounter with an evil cult (typical dnd stuff yknow). Basically it's all the horrible things, the group saw piles of bodies, but also saw a few survivors who were horrible brainwashed + traumatized from everything. We fought this cult leader, Vialis, but before we could finish him off, he teleported away. Finnean, seeing all the death and carnage around him, realized that he wished that they had been able to kill this man so he could never do this to anyone else again. Sometimes the world is a better place with certain people dead. (This cult encounter is where we have gotten one of the lines that has become our paladin's maxim throughout the campaign and has now become a central theme: "Death is inevitable, but not today" Whether that death is the PCs, those NPCs/citizens we are trying to protect, etc. Everyone will eventually die, but that doesn't mean we won't fight like hell to push it down the line later. So yeah, Finnean realizes that sometimes killing is necessary and it's part of his duty as an adventurer to carry it out.

During the course of Dragon Heist, Finnean and his friends (our party calls themelves The Keepers of the Howling Moon because we set up/own a karaoke bar in Waterdeep called The Howling Moon and it just sounds sick as shit) work for Vajra Safahr, the Blackstaff. She's basically the archmage of Waterdeep and I love her so much. Finnean and her have developed a friendship throughout the campaign. At first, I'm pretty sure she viewed him as a kid with a good heart, but green in the gills. However, as the party learned and grew and saved Waterdeep from devils, she has become much more comfortable with the party. Finnean opened up to her about his own self-doubt to her and she in turn revealed her own insecurities as the youngest Blackstaff in Waterdeep history and how she is pulled in a million different directions always. Whenever we're in Waterdeep and have downtime, Finnean spends a lot of time with her. Usually, he'll visit her tower and they'll each work on whatever they need to together. We have sending stones that connect directly to her and are CONSTANTLY trying to fill her in on what's going on with us. I just... love her so much

Another important NPC to Finnean is one Renaer Neverember. I wanna say we met him in session two, saw him be insanely competent in battle, and Finnean was IMMEDIATELY smitten with him. At the beginning of the campaign there was... so much failed flirting and obliviousness on Finnean's end. I think the most mortifying one was, Finnean went to his house, followed a courting ritual suggested by another party member (who, unbeknownst to him at this point, had just escaped from a cult so her perspective on romance was severely skewed), and then, when Renaer tried to let him down gently, misinterpreted his words and believed they were dating. After lots of second hand embarrassment, Finnean got his ass handed to him emotionally (Renaer basically said "look, you seem like a great guy, but I have a lot going on with my dad rn" but was never a dick) and resolved that they would never be more than friends.

However, there have been so many moments where Renaer singles out Finnean specifically from the rest of the party: getting bracers of defense for his birthday, lingering touches as the party goes off the Baldur's Gate, etc, etc. So in character, Finnean has already resolved they can never be more than friends based just on how badly all previous attempts at pursuing him went. Out of character I am just SCREAMING because the stories of Finnean and Renaer are so similar to each other, but so different.

Renaer has a bad relationship with his father Dagult, who is an important figure in the city of Neverwinter. His father embezzled a shit ton of Waterdeep money and then dipped. Renaer has had to deal with the mess his father left behind, despite how much he wants to wash his hands of everything and be his own person. To most people he will be a Neverember first, and then Renaer. Finnean, on the other hand, barely knew his father. He used his father's books to study and connected to him that way, but there was never any expectation placed on him to be anything but himself. However, when he learns more about his father, who he was and how he disappeared, he knows that he must finish what his dad started, no matter how much the idea of it scares him.

Speaking of Finnean's dad, Finnean found out more about him by a Cleric/Warlock of the Raven Queen literally giving him the memories of his father's last moments. He had been researching this ancient lich and had finally figured out his location. He left a package and letter to Finnean and then set out to confront the lich. He didn't tell anyone what he was doing and didn't take any sort of backup with him. He ultimately died in his quest.

So cue a couple weeks in game later, we finally make our way back to Finnean's village to retrieve this package for Finnean, which pointed out some suspect ruins. There was a SHIT ton of stuff that happened there for each of us PCs (Paladin/Barbarian from the cult of Orcus had an emotional confrontation with her older brother, trying to save him from whatever entity's control he was under and Warlock/Sorcerer basically found out that she was not who she thought she was (too convoluted to explain easily, but essentially due to the trauma of seeing her sister die in front of her, she took on the persona of her sister to shield herself from that truth + her patron took advantage of that trauma further in making their pact)). The shit that happened with Finnean was twofold

Motherfucking DAEMARIS of all people was in these ruins, performing a ritual to open a portal for the bbeg lich. Finnean always knew he was an asshole, but he never thought he could ever actually be evil. They had a very intense confrontation, and when Finnean tried to get an answer about why Daemaris was doing this and hurting people, Daemaris accused Finnean of being a hypocrite. He wasn't very clear, but essentially said that they both play judge, jury, and executioner. They both kill. We have not played much past this, but now Finnean is spiraling because he thinks that Daemaris might be right. The first time Finnean killed someone, he literally threw up. Now though, he and his party members kill those they deem evil without hesitation and is that right for him? Yes, some people are probably better off dead, but to the extent of what they've been doing? He has a lot to think about. Even if this isn't true, Daemaris' mind games have worked on him. I definitely see a future where Finnean hesitates in the heat of battle and either he, or worse, one of his friends gets hurt because of it. Also, even though I as a player really really want to kill Daemaris, I think Finnean will struggle with this a lot more and probably won't be able to finish him off

Nezerac, the lich, was able to get through the portal and gave a long villain speech and one of the things he said implied that something about Finnean was only able to do all this because of him (so that could mean the source of his magic, his lineage, his village, SOMETHING) which is really just horrifying. And also probably gives a hint as to why Daemaris is working with Nezerac. He also revealed that he had been keeping an eye on the whole party since the very beggining which is so concerning. Nezerac then straight up killed Finnean and the Warlock and then provided two diamonds for the paladin to revivify them as a power move/taunt. And like I said, haven't played past this yet but Finnean is gonna SPIRAL and feel a shit ton of guilt about the entire encounter because the only reason his friends were there was because of him.

I think Finnean has half a thought that he should not let them get involved further, that he needs to hide his guilt that he feels about putting them in this position. He needs to be stronger and strong means that he would be able to handle this on his own. But then he also remembers the last memories of his father (which are now as good as his own memories), where he tried to confront Nezerac on his own and the only thing he did was get himself killed and give Nezerac another soul to gain power from. Maybe if he had spoken with Mordenkainen, or any of the other powerful wizards he knew, he would still be here and Finnean wouldn't be the one who has to deal with all of this. Something something, treading the path of his father but not making the same mistakes

There's probably stuff I'm leaving out about him, but like... I love him. If anything happens to Finnean I will genuinely be inconsolable for at least a week. He's the first dnd character I ever created and I absolutely love playing him because he has all this real shit going on, but also has the capacity to be Just A Little Guy when we aren't in the thick of it. (And I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I think he gets a lot of good, funny moments outside of serious scenes to keep things from getting too dire)

Rapid fire little moments/facts about Finnean:

He has a ferret familiar named Fenny (short for Fenjamin). Fenny's "wriggly body is optimized for dance" and essentially when he's running around the battlefield and distracting our enemies (aka giving the help action to give one of us advantage on attacks) he's "dancing" :)

Met Volo (aka in-universe writer of Volo's Guide to Monsters), had an insane fanboy moment, and got him to sign multiple things including a copy of the book which he kept as a prized possession

His wizard robes were sewn for him by his mom and his name is stitched into the neck part

His spellbook is actually a library book from his hometown. He didn't realize that those needed to be returned though, so it's horribly horribly overdue (we actually just got back to his village a session or two ago and he had to pay a huge fine on it because it's now so beat up it can't be returned lol)

Made the poor choice of buying a Gucci belt for way too much gold (from Old Man Gucci at Ye Old Gucci Shoppe) but then became disillusioned with the drip when he kept seeing assholes wearing them

Helped make magical WWE called Mage Mania (I ordered shirts for my group as Christmas gifts after 2 years of us joking about it. I'm so excited for these)

For an event at the karaoke bar, he disguised self to make himself look like a women. Rolled a nat 20 for hotness and so was disguised as an extremely hot MILF. Daemaris (back before we knew he was like... actually evil) hit on him endlessly and it was very fun to see his reaction when Finnean dropped the disguise and revealed that he had been pursuing the "idiot loser" all night

Loves to study and learn languages (he initially bonded with the paladin/barbarian by taking Abyssal lessons from her)

#thank you anon for giving me an outlet to be mentally ill about him. this for sure is word vomit and probably makes like 10% sense to others #but it let me think about him for a bit so I very much appreciate it #ask #dnd #Finnean Galondel #(gonna start tagging stuff for him I think. in case I wanna spout more bs about him or the campaign)#long post #like really long post holy shit I'm so sorry nobody is obligated to read this

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