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7grandmel · 1 month

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Todays rip: 25/03/2024

The Life and Times of Wade L.D.

Season 3 Part of: The SiIvaGunner Christmas Comeback Crisis

Directed by Smoky, Chaze the Chat Music by dante Full list of credits on Wiki

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Requested by Jiko Music! (Request Form)

Five years. It's been five whole years since the third season of SiIvaGunner came to an end. Five whole years since, in some ways, the channel began charting a course that would change it's direction forever. Season 4 Episode 1's mission statement was incredibly concise - to return the channel's chaotic, unpredictable nature of the Season 1 days, and to deliver on the absolute titan of an event that was the King for Another Day Tournament. After various production woes in the Christmas Comeback Crisis' main storyline and a newfound interest in other ventures through the King for a Day Tournament, it became evident that there simply wouldn't be much room left over in the itinerary for the channel's ongoing storyline in 2019. And so, in a way, Season 3's finale marked the day that the channel's storyline bowed out to a backseat position - yet with The Life and Times of Wade L.D., they did so with utmost splendor.

I've said before on here, at least way back on 時の回廊＜ver. CCC＞, that I don't wish to get too hung up on dissecting the Christmas Comeback Crisis storyline in particular - compared to most other lore on the channel, the form it takes is one that any average viewer is well able to dissect and watch on their own without much added context needed. I adore the series and wish to celebrate it - particularly its later endeavours - with my whole heart, but if I did I feel as if I'd inevitably be writing up to pages in the triple digits. Yet even if you're not all too familiar with the Christmas Comeback Crisis, be it as a newer fan or just plainly someone uninterested in the lore, it's pretty immediately noticeable that The Life and Times of Wade L.D. has a far different feel to it than other endeavors in the series. For one, the story told doesn't follow a character like Wood Man or Smol Nozomi or Haltmann, but an entirely new character - one who is created and (seemingly) ceases to exist entirely within this storyline. It is in some ways a standalone story - one that, perhaps more noticeably, is presented in an incredibly unique fashion - through an chronological archive of various recordings, emails, receipts, logs and photographs all centered around the titular Wade L.D. character. A character who, for the first time in the Christmas Comeback Crisis story, depicts the life of the everyman in Grandiose City - those who are not heroes nor villains, but are simply trying to exist within this strife-filled world that The Voice Inside Your Head unleashed at the series' beginning. Three years deep into this storyline, and it's officially become so much more than just the fun Kirby: Planet Robobot spoof that Patched Plains Fusion Collab, Mother's・Caption (We Paused The Channel For HOW Long?! Mix), The Noble Haltmann and so many more rips were all themed around. With Season 3 in particular, we'd gotten so many deeper insights into how this universe's world and operations were undergoing, small little peeks behind the curtain - it only makes it all the more befitting for the season to end with a full-on investigation of the truth. "Trust Nobody. Doubt Everything."

I believe its fair to say that The Life and Times of Wade L.D. was one of the most ambitious individual videos the team had made at the point of its release. Throughout its entire, gargantuan 30-minute runtime, we're spoiled with quality in so many different areas, from the fantastic artwork that maintains the story's mysterious atmosphere perfectly, to Smoky's remarkable writing being able to effortlessly ping-pong between seriousness and sly comedic jabs and references, to the soundtrack done entirely by the CCC series' sound director and certified GOAT, dante. Before the King for Another Day Tournament had the world floored, it was The Life and Times of Wade L.D. that kept impressing me with every turn - the commitment the team still had to this story, despite the clear signs to move on from it that they would eventually take in the years to come, was awe inspiring.

All of this is punctuated by what perhaps sets the story apart the most from other CCC productions - the full voice acting of all spoken and/or recorded dialogue. Season 3 was still a time where the voice acting the channel would have was typically in jest, either through sentence-mixing, text-to-speech, or through jokey rips altogether such as Haltmanna feat. Rob Thomas of Matchbox 20. Before Season 4 Episode 1 and onward would bring proper voice-acted performances for characters like John NotWoodman, DJ Professor K, and Joke-Explainer 7000, we had this. And perhaps unsurprisingly, it is that titular character, Wade L.D. himself, voiced by ripper CaptainComedy, who through my every rewatch still impresses me most in his performance. At once, CaptainComedy's performance feels tired, fed up, exhausted, yet also like someone no more different than you or I - a true everyman, a cog in the machine, yet one with pent-up anger and frustration building up inside of him, anger that comes out as events unfold.

Its hard to not get excited, as a big lorehead, to have the narrative in question focus so much on loose ends set up by prior CCC events and Haltmann's Archives videos. The presence of 2B from Nier Automata as a prominent character, the direct callbacks to the first-ever side story in Waluigi's Tacostand and establishing its bizarrely critical plot importance, the building drama between Haltmann and The Voice, the investigation onto SiIvaGunner's empty house and the traces of Woodman's presence there from the very start of Season 2...there is such an overarching feeling of satisfaction throughout all of The Life and Times of Wade L.D., as if I'm being genuinely rewarded for having paid attention to all of the channel's workings ever so extensively. All capped off by a genuinely touching narrative about the gradual collapse of a man's life.

Yet more than that satisfaction, what I love most about The Life and Times of Wade L.D. - above the music, the story, the artwork, the lore, or whatever else - is how much it still truly feels like a SiIvaGunner production. CaptainComedy's performance is incredible, yes - but right alongside him, you have channel founder Chaze the Chat playing a literal self-insert of himself, dubbed by only the most modest amount of investment into the role, althewhile making references to Maroon 5 and Kara's Flowers. There's references and nods to prior CCC episodes, an ongoing bait-and-switch joke that sees "Dr. P", set up to be a reference to the Dr. Piccolo meme, actually turn out to be referencing Dr. Pavel of Baneposting (Maskettaman - Dr. Pavel's Fly-So-Good) fame. There's just this subtle cheekiness to it all - never any sign that the episode and the storyline aren't being sincere, yet with countless signs to remind you of just how much fun the team are having in producing this story. A beating heart. A passion.

There are so many readings one could make of the storyline, that I don't know where to - or even if I should - begin. In our real world, the SiIvaGunner channel is a passion project driven entirely by voluntary contributors, a group of people contributing to a greater whole as a hobby out of love for the channel, their craft, and one another. It stands in stark contrast to the version of SiIvaGunner that The Voice Inside Your Head seeks to create, a symbol of the whiniest of fans of the channel's early days, and it stands in even starker contrast to what Haltmann further wishes for it to be - to produce rips as content, as products, as a job to attend just like Wade L.D. himself does. Wade's journey is one of excessive overwork, of burnout - perhaps not of making rips, yet with work pertaining to SiIvaGunner itself althesame. The environment Haltmann has created necessitates that Wade finds escapes from his job in order to feel relieved from it, that his work offers him no relief or fun - that the act of contributing to SiIvaGunner's growth is, at this stage, no longer something done out of passion. The Christmas Comeback Crisis, as meme-filled as it and the entire channel its hosted on is, is a form of a dystopia, if a subtle one, and the insight we get into Wade's life shows just how dire a project like SiIvaGunner could, in a far-worse world, be.

I could, really, as I said before, go on forever about this, about any Christmas Comeback Crisis episode. The series means the world to me, the CHANNEL of SiIvaGunner of course means the world to me as well - but it was, as I've said many a time before, through Season 2 that I unabashedly fell in love with the project. The Life and Times of Wade L.D. was everything I could have ever wanted a side story of the Christmas Comeback Crisis to be, and it warms my heart to see so many people from the team still cherish it. Be it dante reminiscing on how important of a project it was for him as a composer, or indeed this post's requestee, Jiko Music, arranging the episode's main theme for RIP^2 just last year with the beautiful LD. Its clear that it's so much more than just another piece to the SiIvaGunner lore - as perhaps SiIvaGunner's best Season finale second only to the one Season 7 just provided us, The Life and Times of Wade L.D. is downright incredible.

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mth-emma · 10 months

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hi. a really long time ago you tweeted this

unfortunately god is dead (rip SOPHIE) and the lost media wiki has expanded to offer new and exciting questions about the meaning of life by which i mean more reasons to torture you and your tumblr ask box

pretty much everyone knows what o and p were at this point but what about the other stuff? when the siivagunner wiki doesn't know what the jokes even were that's when we have a real issue on our hands. and by real issue i mean the most esoteric nerd shit ever. :3

Final Level - Mighty Switch Force Back in 2018 Chaze made an effort to find this rip after being asked about it. It was uploaded long before we had any kind of concise logging on who made what, so he went around and messaged everyone who was in Backroom at the time to see if they happened to still have the file. Nobody had it, and the person actually most likely to have uploaded it had lost the contents of the hard drive they had at the time. Any further attempts throughout the year have proven similarly unfruitful. Status: Lost

o & p The wiki has pretty detailed explanations of these, so there's not much to add there. Both videos were part of the Reboot ARG and were always unlisted, but when p got a community strike for nudity we decided to private o just in case it was also getting flagged. (I assume, because that makes the most sense.) The videos are still on the channel so they are not lost! I have reuploaded them here for your viewing pleasure, though please do mind that even though there isn't really anything explicit visible, they are based on directly on pornographic footage. Status: Archived Links: o (direct mp4) - p (direct mp4)

Because I Love You (Alpha Mix) - Earthbound Roughly half an hour after this was uploaded, the creator of this rip sent a DM to a backroom member saying "I think you should delete my rip because I noticed off key sections and clipping," adding that "even people in the comment section noticed it," and that they "disown that rip". In response to this, some team members said that while the execution of the rip was indeed lacking, it did have potential, but it never ended up being fixed and resubmitted. 28 hours after the initial upload, the rip was deleted while another backroom member was cleaning out some of the private videos (most of which were test uploads or otherwise stuff not meant to go public to begin with). They also noted that the rip in question was "garbo". The original ripper may still have this, but they are no longer affiliated with the SiIvaGunner team so I will not be reaching out. Status: Undetermined

Main Theme (Summer) - Wii Shop Channel This rip was removed due to its awkward execution, and was planned to be revised by someone else shortly after its removal. This never ended up happening, but the original file remains archived. Status: Privately archived

Lost in Thoughts All Alone - Fire Emblem Fates This rip got muted for copyright reasons shortly after being uploaded, and was probably deleted not too long after. I sadly have no idea who made it or what it contained. Status: Lost in Thoughts All Alone

Central Highway - Mega Man X Accidental duplicate upload. Contents are identical. Status: Not lost

#siivagunner #lost media #ask

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decadentenemyturtle · 3 years

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The Great Unknown

Part 24

Pairing: Thorin x Reader, mentioned Robin Hood x Regina Mills

Words: 4022

Warnings: Mention of murder, dead people, bad language.

Crossover of The Hobit and Once Upon a Time!

All the parts of The Great Unknown!

You ran silently towards burning Laketown, your heart in your stomach. There was no sight of Smaug anywhere, and the two elves had confirmed that they didn't see or hear any big animal, or creature for the matter, in the sky that could have lit the town on fire. So, either the dragon was already dead, or the town had been set on fire by someone else. But who had done it exactly was still unsure for the trio.

The last twenty minutes or so felt like eternity. And when you finally got to the road that led to the town on water, you could see dead orcs and men lying on the wooden road on water. You quickly counted five dead men and one woman, and six orcs. All dead, their lifeless bodies laying face down on the water or staring to the sky above on the wooden road, not seeing anything. And after seeing the lifeless bodies, something sifted in you, clenching your heart.

This was, no doubt, an orc raid. But why? Because of your friends? Had the dwarves been here, and by accident, led the orcs here? Or had the orcs lost the sight and track of your friends and thought that they had escaped in the Lakedown, killing everyone on their way and set the town on fire?

You were still a leopard as you walked the burning streets of Laketown. There were no soul in this town. No screaming, crying, pleading of help to be heard. Nothing but the cracking of fire or the burning woord craking and finally giving up, collapsing down. You didn't know these people living in this town, yet you felt your heart beating harder, clenching like someone was holding it in his hand and squeezing it with all their might. They might be all dead, for all you knew. Some of them might have managed to escape, but where? There were few dead bodies of men, women and even children, and orcs here and there, but not as many as you might have expected. And then Tauriel stopped and motioned you and Legolas to stop. And you did.

And then you saw him. A male, standing alone on street, staring at something ahead of him, yet hidden from your sight. And then the wind carried his fainth smell to your nose. And you took a shaky breath.

"Impossible" you said with a shaky voice, taking a step towards this person. Legolas and Tauriel lowered their eyes to you, seemingly understanding what you had just said. And before neither of them could ask you anything, you bolted towards this man. And when he noted that something was running towards him, you let the magic sircle you, change your form. And little by little your running slowed as your steps from leopard turned into a human's.

"Grandpa!" you finally shouted and then the males face fell as he recognized you, his face showing multiple emotions in few seconds. And yet he opened his arms, keeping his walking stick on his other arm. And you ran to his arms, sirckling your hands around his middle, sob leaving from your lips as tears started to fall down from your eyes. And he closed his arms around you, his wooden walking stick touching your back like it always would when he hugged you. For the first time in ages you felt like you were home. This, this simple hug, was the closest thing you knew for safest place and what was nearest you could ever call home.

"Oh my little singing bird, I thought we had lost you for good" the older man cried, pressing his nose to your dirty hair. The two elves got closer to you, knowing that this man was good - with bad history, but still good. They could see his fea, which was now brighter with a memory of its darker days, what were now gone forever. And the fact how you acted after seeing him, they knew he was important to you. And Legolas knew, that with this man's help, he could help his cousin regain her memory. And just as they got closer to them, this man lifted his eyes to them and the young girl turned her buffy, teary eyes to them.

"It's OK" you reassured the older man, to calm the situation. "Grandpa, meet my friend Tauriel" the red headed nodded to the human "and my ... err... might-be-cousin Legolas" the blond nodded his head and was ready to have earfull or defend himself from this human. But, instead, he got an nod from this man. "Tauriel, Legolas, meet a man and powerfull sorcerer from Stoorybrook, my grandfather, Rumpelstiltskin, or Rumble for a short" And just then did Legolas and Tauriel truly understand. He was her kind, an human from another world. Her kin, a person she trusted, probably even more than she trusted to the two of them.

Legolas took a step towards them, put his hand to his heart and bowed a little. And when he rose to meet this man's eyes, he could see understanding, the same passion to want to protect someone he cared about.

"I know now isn't the best of the times, but we have a lot to discuss about her" Legolas said, nodding towards you. Rumble looked a little down you, a faint of an smile on his lips. Then he turned back to Legolas.

"Indeed there is. But, I believe we have more important things at hands. A group of orcs attacked this town, and while myself and my companion's were able to take them all down with the townsfolk, alongside with their leader - if the biggest one of them was suppose to be their leader - we have no idea why they attacked" Rumble answered. Legolas nodded and then he turned to look around them, looking for the dead orc. When he turned back to Rumble, he turned to one of the roads. "The biggest one is dead just behind that building. Two of our best warriors took it down. And few of our women took the townsfolk safe to our town, Stoorybroke"

A relief ran in the three travellers. Most of the townsfolk were safe. "Altought these people fought hard, I... Well, I believe their leader died while he tried to save his gold and other richess. I believe he even got rid of few of his workers in order to save the gold" You grimaced and Legolas' and Tauriel's faces turned grimm. The leader of this town would really put richess above his workers and the people who lived in here. That was just disgusting and disrespecful. It wasn't right to think, that it was a good thing that he was dead, but still, you couldn't help but think that he had deserved it.

"The orcs were chasing down a group of dwarves, who are friends of (Y/n)'s. She and the dwarves were trespassing in on our lands, and the dwarves were taken as prisoners. Back then we did not know of her existence. As the dwarves told us, they had lost sight of (Y/n) at somepoint in the forest and they had been ended up apart from each other. Myself and Legolas found her just today, when the dwarves escaped from our dungeon and were chazed down by these orcs" Tauriel tells to Rumble, who in turn frowns and nods.

"Our home, the forest you can see afar, is surrounded by magic that can confuse one's mind. I am not exactly sure why that is, but if I have understood it correctly, it is because of our oldest enemy's dark magic" Legolas answers to Rumble's unasked question. Rumble swallows and nods.

"I believe this strong enemy of yours is currently somewhere in the forest. I can feel dark, one of the most malice-like bearing somewhere in there. Not close to us, but still, it is in there. And I can feel powerfull light in there, not like sun in the sky, but a light of ones heart. Her power shines brighter than any light has shone directly to my eye. I wonder how powerfull her light would be, if she stood right next to me?" Rumble says, while staring at the far of the forest, where he had been staring before meeting the three of you. While Legolas and Tauriel exhange worried looks, you look up to your grandpa, horrified. Then you turned to look at the forest. You knew what was in that direction, and just what kind of an enemy had been keeping an fortress in the old ruins in the forest.

And then you swallowed. That was where Gandalf had went before you stepped into the darkness of Mirkwood, that was where Thorin's father had been held captive all these years, and that was where the old dwarf had died. That was where your possible father-in-law had died. Your face fell even more as you thought of Thorin, who had been looking for his father all those years, keeping some kind of hope in his heart that his father was still alive. And you knew, that Gandalf was enough of an covard to not to tell the truth to Thorin, and how it fell to you to dig the truth from the old wizard and pass the news to Thorin. You knew Thorin would never really forgive you, even when he already knew that his father was in the old ruins and would not make it out alive. And there was the fact that that was where Sauron had showed himself after all these years, where Galadriel, Elrond and Saruman had fought against him and his nine ghostly ring bearers.

You knew that this world was in danger, but you also knew that your knowledge couldn't save this world from the darkness. Or, well, it could, but this world had to find it's own way to help itself.

And there would be people, who would lose their lives during these years, or even decades. Numerous lives, from every race. You knew how to stop Sauron, but it was not in your hands to show the way. Deep in your heart you knew, that all of the races had to face these losses, find a way to work with their kind and with other races, and work together against this strong enemy and trust each other, no matter how hard it was. Because, in the end, there would be people, who would go against this strong enemy. There was a possibility that you wouldn't be alive anymore when this would happen. And the fact was... you were not a saviour of this world. You could only help to fight the current situtation, help to fight against the last dragon, somewhat help to see the bigger problem and enemy of this world without giving the name out loud or spilling the whole truth.

You were not Gandalf.

You were not a hero or a saviour of this world.

And in order to the races to trust more eachother, they had to face Sauron. And to trust eachother, they had to see the problem themselves, to feel it themselves. A child does not learn, if you do not let him learn himself first. Knowing this was a reason you knew you couldn't be the one, who would spill the beans of the enemy, to be the one who would be marked as a hero and saviour.

You were...You were you, (Y/n), daughter of Regina and Robin, daughter of Glorfindel and Sarael. You had to protect the people and animals from the enemy, not to destroy him. It was not your destiny, what had been planned out for you.

"... But there was a small group of dwarves running through the streets at some point, but I had no time to take a good look at them. The town was already in chaos, and we had to get the people safe and take down the orcs, all the while out watching for the fire and trying to save the people from the burning houses" you heard your grandpa say. You had zoned out while lost in your thoughts and missed their talking. You looked up to Rumble, and just then did he look down at you. "We could not save everyone, unfortunately. There was only handfull of us, and too many things to do at the same time" You nodded and lowered your eyes back to the dirty, wooden road. It wasn't their fault that some of the people had died. They had done their best, and Tauriel even pointed that out, thanking Rumble for their efforts for saving as many people as possible.

And just as Tauriel had finished, you started to hear loud talking. Your head jerked up to the direction of the sound. You recognised the voices, who they belonged to. And tears were growing to your eyes, again, as soon as your brain registered just who these voice's belonged to. After so many months, you had finally met your granfather, and now you could meet your friends, uncles, and your father. When the group appeared to your sight, you saw your father leading the Merry Men, the Seven dwarves right next to them, Emma and Captain Hook, their daughter Ruth and son Leo, Roland and Henry, David, Big sis Red and Tinkerbell walking towards you. Seeing them left you breathless. You took a step towards them, then second one, and when one of the Merry uncles saw you, you let out a scream and ran towards them. And just then did your father turn towards you.

"DAD!" you screamed from the depth of your lungs. His face fell even more, and he let out some sort of an sob and laugh before hoisting his bow to his shoulder and started running towards you. When the two of you met, you jumped to his neck, and his hands went around your back. And you both cried. Seeing your grandpa had been an relief and bringing some happiness and feeling of safety to you, but now when you where hugging your father, you knew you were safe. Now everything was almost fine. You just needed to see your mother to finish the sircle.

And then there were more hands surrounding you two as your uncle Merries and your brothers Henry and Roland circled you to hug you, all of them crying of relief too see you alive and fine. After all these months, they had finally found their lost little sister and princess.

You didn't know how long you stayed in their arms, being welcomed back home, to safety, until they let go of you. Your father took a good look at you, his eyes being as teary as they could. And after a few seconds, he cupped your cheek and let out a sob, before a small smile grew on his face.

"Months you were lost from us, and look at you now. You are a woman, an hero with hidden power" he praised you, tears still falling from his eyes. And you smiled. This man, your father, saw your little changes and was still proud of you. He saw the hero in you, before you even knew that you were one. And he knew you had an hidden talent, without even seeing it or without you telling anything about it. However he did it, you did not know.

"Well, I have gained a new.. or, well... I found my old life and the magical talent that comes with it after arriving here. And, I found out something interesting about my... past life before Stoorybrook. Buuuut, I still need to confirm it, and I'm not quite sure how to do it" you said and your father raised his brow, as did Roland and the Merry uncle's, and pretty much every new person here. Expect Henry, who as a writer already knew about it.

"So, she finally knows how to burn people alive?" Leo half-whispered, earning an loud slap to his head from someone, probably from his sister, or from his father. You just rolled your eyes and then answered the question that everyone had. Only your grandpa had seen it, but he had not been in a state where he could actually link it to a magic. Or, then he already had done so, but had not said anything. Or, then he had, when you hadn't been listening to him and the two elves earlier. Well, anyway, now you were going to spill the beans in front on everyone - and oh Goodie, you had to do this like billions times over when you'd get back home Stoorybrooke.

"I still don't know how to do that, or use magic in any other ways than-" you began, as you let the magic circle you, and then, in middle of your sentence you turned into a husky. Everyones eyes were glued to you. And it was silent for a few seconds, before Grumby pointed a finger at you and turned to look at others next to him "She just turned into a dog! Who did that?!" Some people, your grandpa being one of them, rolled their eyes.

"I believe she did it herself" David told matter of factly, looking at you smiling, like a proud father. Well, he was your half grandfather, so... Grumby looked at him and then down at you, his frown deepening. You walked to them, taking again your human form.

"I... well, better explain this now, but I have to keep this short and I hope you'll leave the questions for later" you said and waited for everyone to nod for understanding "As you all know, my parents, Robin and Regina, and my Merry uncles found me from the forest when I was a baby, and how Robin and Regina decided to adopt me when my real parent's didn't show up to reclaim me or how they could not be found. While I have been in this world, which is also called as Middle-Earth or Arda, I have found out why they didn't come and get me"

You took a few deep breath, and closed your eyes for a second. This felt horrible thing to tell, especially because your father was here, even when you knew that you had nothing to worry about. Seconds passed on before you could feel your fathers and grandfathers presen's behind you, and you lifted your eyes back to everyone infront of you. You could do this, and you knew that no matter what, everyone, including your father, would understand. And no one would hate you after hearing about your origins.

"After a few days I had come to this world, I turned into a husky, a dog you just saw. At first myself and my companion, 13 dwarves, a wizard named Gandalf and Bilbo from race of hobbits, thought it was because of Gandalf's magic, that... kind of happened because of an accident... and kind of because I had a fight with my... um... nevermind... But then we learned about a secret race of shape turning mayas - sort of spirits of this world - who guarded this world few thousand years ago. And their leader, or gueen or whatever, Sarael is believed to be my mother. And my father is an elf called Glorfindel. There are, for now, two facts confirming me to be their daughter. The first thing is the fact that I can use magic to turn myself into a animal, even when it took me for a quite long to figure it out how to use it. And the second fact is that the blond elf over there, also called Legolas, said that my fea, or soul is the same as Glorfindel's and Sarael's daughter's. And, as he put it, he is a cousin of mine" you continued telling your complicated history.

People from Stoorybrooke shared an look, before they turned to look at you and then Legolas. Then you felt your father wrap his arm around your shoulder, squeezing your shoulder, just as smiles started to break on the others faces. You turned to look up to your father, who smiled.

"I'm happy to hear, that you have found your family. Where are you other parent's?" Robin asked. He must have guessed that you had found someone special to you, but choose to ignore it. Your smiled dropped a little. You might know, who your parents were, but...

"Aut Sarael died at war against orcs about a thousand years ago, and before she died, she got (Y/n)'s fea safe. Glorfindel should be at Lothórien, annoying lady Galadriend and lord Celeborn. Or, that is where I last heard he should be, but if he has heard of (Y/n), he should be on his way to her" Legolas says. And then Tauriel frowns and turns to Legolas.

"But if lady Galadriel is in Dol Guldur, then Glorfindel must be there too. You know very well that blond haired drama queen loves dangerous situation's" Tauriel said with far too serious tone. You, with rest of the citizen of Stoorybrooke, stared at her with different mixture of disbilief.

"And here I thought he was a noble elf...." you mumbled. Legolas and Tauriel had heard this, and all they could do was to roll their eyes. Well, never make an first impression of an persion you have never met. You put on an note to your brains to lower all the possible images you had on your father, because, clearly he was not what you thought he would be. And after hearing Tauriel's little description, you weren't even sure what to expect from him.

One burning house collapsed behind you, and you all turned to look at it, a little starled. And you stared at it, being silent for some time.

"We should go back to Stoorybrooke. This town is evacuated, and the orcs have been killed. There's nothign left for us in here" David says, and the rest nod. Even Tauriel and Legolas seemed to be eager to go to this new town. Or go on their own way. You really didn't know, what those two were going to do now, since there were no living orcs to chase or hurt or poisoned dwarves to heal.

And then you thought about Thorin, and the rest of the company. Rumple had said that he had seen dwarves, but you weren't sure how many he had seen. Were they all alive, healthy, together? And more imprtantly, where were they?

You turned to look at the Lonely mountain and held your breath. You had lost your sence of time in the Woods, so you weren't sure when Durin's day was suppose to be. And then Henry was next to you, smiling like a mad man. You glared up at him. This man, your older brother, was the only one who could write your story, and who would know where your friends were.

"You go back to Stoorybrooke! Me and my sister are going to look for her One true love" Henry says and his grin was far to big. At the same time you wanted to kick him, and hug him. And your glare told as much to him, as his grin grew bigger.

"Well, I suppose you aren't the only one going to look for them" you heard captain Hook say. He, and few other of your friends and relatives gathered behind you, smiling like they had just learned a juicy secret. And you sighed. These were your friends. No matter where they were from.

"Well, alright then. One group with me to hunt these idiots down, the other one goes back to Stoorybrooke to make sure that everyone from this town is safe. And, someone looke for Bard. I need something black and pointy from his herbs. And someone, please, please tell my mother that I love her" you say. And then everyone puts on their best poker face.

"Well, about your mother....." your grandfather says, with the most serious look.

Tag-list; @lidda @lady-bee-fechin @queendarkmuffin @silencegetawayfromme @kettnerjanea @stories-by-shanna-p @ealasaid @jumpingmanatee @fab-notfat @bae-age @fricking-ghoul @k-youre-a-fantasy-blog @dumbgopher1 @maddybeck01 @naminalati @leah-halliwell92 @evyiione @tschrist1 @red608 @aliendaddiesneeded @letsbeinspiredby @jotink78 @dragongirl642 @shxrrybomb @awaiting-pointless-dreams @leac813 @sukeraa

#the hobbit #once upon a time #fanfiction #the hobbit fanfiction #once upon a time fanfic #thorin #thorin oakenshield #thorin x reader

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amydancepants-peralta · 5 years

Note

46. Argument leading to kissing/sex for the prompts? 🥰

Sooo I really wasn’t going to make this smutty. And then, ya know … smut happened. Here goes. I hope it fills the prompt okay!

*NSFW*

I like the way it hurts

The day had held such promise when Jake and Amy had walked out their front door that morning. Amy had been clutching two reusable coffee cups filled with precious homemade caffeine (because this way they were saving the planet and saving money, she’d stated with pride the first time they used them), her body turned away from Jake as he’d locked up. His hand had slid over her waist briefly, wandering dangerously low before leaning in to drop a gentle kiss to her neck, and when she’d looked over at him in mock indignation he’d thrown her a wink, grabbing one of the cups of java.

Their laughter had bounced off the staircase as they’d made their way down to the car, neither of them aware of what the day had in store for them.

Fast forward to this evening, their angry steps heavy against the wooden planks as both face resolutely forward. Both were waiting for the other to throw the first grenade, and the tension between them was palpable.

Jake waits until they’re crossing the landing to their apartment before taking the first shot. “All I’m saying Amy, is that Boyle and I had been working that case for weeks before you came along. There were things that we knew that couldn’t be contained to some dumb report. You should have taken my opinions on board.”

“I’m a Sergeant, Jacob.” If he was going to full-name her, then she was going to do the same. “Sometimes, there is information that I am privy to, that I cannot disclose to you. You know that. And despite that, you went against me.”

Two of Amy’s uniformed patrol officers had been conducting a routine walk by today when they had noticed two familiar faces walk into an unmarked building. Chaze Wagner and Tyler Melton - the two men currently on the APB for their alleged involvement in seven robberies, five assaults, two counts of drug trafficking, and a partridge in a pear tree. To put it simply, they were Not Good News, and their location had been reported through to Amy without haste.

Under her direction they had run surveillance on the building, holding until further instruction; while Amy, knowing that Jake and Charles had been working on a case involving these two, had headed straight to them for the update.

Having come out of a meeting with higher-ups earlier that day, Amy had shouted clear instructions as they suited up: for them to hold their positions with the patrol officers on scene until the ESU had arrived. Given the location, there was the ever present danger of civilians being involved; and it had come to her attention that Wagner and Melton were working under the hand of D’Antonio (a much bigger fish), and if they played their cards right they just might walk away with all three.

To his credit, Jake had followed instruction without question. Until, that is, he saw another man - someone that he and Boyle only knew to be a man named Andrews, enter the building. Someone that, in his eyes, was the worst of the lot, and before he remembered that he was NOT on point, he had been running into the building, gun raised and shouting out instructions.

If he had waited, if he had explained what he had seen, then maybe Amy would have had the chance to tell him what she knew. That Andrews was FBI running undercover, and that his links to the majority of the crimes had been deliberate.

But he hadn’t listened, and had dove head first into the fray, and under Amy’s shout the squad had followed. The resulting altercation had left Andrews in hospital with a gunshot wound to the shoulder - struck by the men he had been deceiving - Wagner and Melton in custody; her officers limping back to the station with varying injuries, and D’Antonio still at large. It was a semi-successful operation, that could have been far better, and the result had left Amy seething.

Needless to say, things had been very tense back at the precinct as Jake and Charles processed the paperwork on the two arrests.

“On paper, Andrews was bad news, Amy. The things that our sources had told us he’d been involved in ran longer than what the other two had done, put together. He was incredibly good at getting away when things take a turn, and there was no way I was going to let him do it again.”

Yanking her key out of the lock, Amy shoved the door open and waited for Jake to walk through before slamming it behind him. “Yet another reason to fill out your paperwork properly, Detective! If all of that had been ‘on paper’, like you say, then you would have been told about Andrews’ involvement in the operation. And then maybe you wouldn’t have run in there, guns blazing, and two of my officers wouldn’t be on medical leave right now! Not to mention all that undercover work, that has now gone up in flames!”

“Well, you should have TOLD me that!”

“You never gave me the chance!” Letting out a frustrated growl, Amy reaches forward, grabbing Jake by the tie and yanking his mouth towards hers. He’s surprised by the sudden change of pace but only hesitates for a moment before pushing right back, teeth clashing as their tongues duel, fighting for dominance. Her left hand is still wrapped around his tie and she uses it to pull him even closer, right hand heading straight for his hair and tugging with just the right amount of pressure.

He pulls away with a gasp, hands gripping both of her upper arms as he stares down at her, jaw set in anger and eyebrows knitting together.

She wasn’t ready for the kiss to end, and she wasn’t interested in talking right now. She lets go of his tie in favour of slapping him against the chest - not hard enough to hurt but enough to let him know that she was hurting. He pulls back slightly, frustrated, but does nothing. Not that she needed to be concerned. Jake would never hit her. He glares back at her, and she hits him again with less force.

He picks up on her cue, and before another thought can be made Jake has dropped his grip on her arms, grabbing her wrists and pushing them upwards until they’re above her head, pressing into the door. He’s pinned her there, hips holding her into place as she cranes her neck forward, desperate for another kiss. There is no hesitation, and they sigh into each other’s mouths as their lips move.

One hand still gripping her contained wrists, Jake uses his other to roam Amy’s body, hand heavy as he follows the curves he knows so well. Her belt, heavy with equipment, falls to the floor with a clunk, and her regulation navy blue pants soon follow. Having half a mind to quickly push off her work boots, Amy takes the opportunity to kick her pants across the living room, moaning into Jake’s mouth as his hand grips her thigh, pulling her closer to him.

His hands are in her underwear within seconds, deft fingers working her up the way only her husband has ever done, and Amy finds herself pulling against the restraint of Jake’s wrist around hers, desperate to wrap herself around him completely. He tightens the grip in response, and she waits until he’s pulling back from their kiss to bite his lower lip in retaliation.

His eyes flash as she pulls away with a satisfied smirk, and he releases her grip before yanking at her blouse, buttons bouncing off the floorboards as they scatter. She gasps at the destruction of her beloved uniform, wrapping her arms around Jake’s neck as he lifts her, hands gripping her ass as he stumbles back towards their living room.

Shaking her head, Amy grips Jake’s hair in her hand, steering him toward the bedroom in between hot kisses. From her current vantage point she can reach the plaid covering him easily and she makes quick work of it, pushing it as far down his shoulders as their position allows before sinking her teeth into the base of his neck. There had been many a hickey marked in this spot in the years they had been together, and there was no chance of that changing anytime soon.

Her bra ends up somewhere between the hallway and their bedroom, and as he throws her unceremoniously onto the bed Amy lets out a breathless moan. She needed him. Now.

Flannel and pants cast aside without a second thought, Jake crawls up the bed to meet Amy, pulling her in for a heated kiss as he tugs at her underwear, letting her legs take over as they lower. His follows hers soon after, and with a nudge of his knees to her thighs he’s pushing in, both releasing a sigh as the scratch began to be itched.

He sets the pace quickly, spurred on by the dig of her nails into his back, and before too long they’re both a mess - a jumbled set of limbs and breathless moans racing for completion.

In an attempt to stave off his impending climax Jake begins to trail kisses along the side of Amy’s jawline, teeth skating at the edge of her earlobe as he travels further, moaning into her skin as one of her hands move to card through his hair.

His eyes flit to the right and for the first time he clocks the beginning of her bruise, taking in the dark hue spreading across her tan skin. She can pinpoint, almost exactly, the moment that he realises just how much he fucked up, and that the consequences for said fuck up didn’t end at the precinct.

He tunes his attention back to her, gaze apologetic as he leans in for another kiss, far more tender this time. His pace slows as his hands land on either side of her face, holding her close as he tries to make his amends with every twist of his tongue against hers. It’s all very sweet, and the apology is appreciated. But she wants to be fucked, and hard.

She bends, taking advantage of his hands on her face by wrapping her legs around his waist, jutting her right hip forward and forcing them to roll. He grunts at the unexpected change of pace, fingers digging into her skin as she begins to move.

“Oh my god, Ammmess …” he moaned, and Amy felt the shiver run down her skin.

She loved when he did that - held onto the M sound of name, sounding it out like he was saying Mmmm. It made her feel … delicious. Jake said and did a lot of things that made Amy felt treasured, but this just may be her favourite.

He looks again at the bruise, seemingly unable to look away, and she cups her hand against his cheek, gently pulling his face back to hers. She smiles down at him as their eyes meet, hips still rising and falling, resting the other hand against his chest as she leans down to kiss him softly - a juxtaposition to the pace she has set. “I’m fine, babe.”

Jake simply hadn’t seen it. Hadn’t noticed, during the fray, when one of the perps had gripped Amy by the shoulder, pushing her with all of his might against one of the walls, hand reaching back in preparation for another blow. She’d been bracing herself for the onslaught when Boyle had grabbed the man by the waist, yanking him backwards until he’d hit the floor. Jake had missed it all, too busy wrestling Wagner to the ground, and she’d been quietly nursing her arm all afternoon.

He noticed it now, though, and she could see the cogs turning in his mind. Reaching into her mental bag of tricks, Amy squeezes her inner muscles against his length, leaning down to rest her forearms on either side of the bed as she changes angles.

His eyes squeeze shut as he throws his head back, moaning as she moves up and down, and Amy licks along the edge of his Adam’s Apple, waiting until his head has dropped back down before pulling him in for another kiss.

They stay like this for a hot minute before Jake’s arms are wrapped around her, twisting until she’s underneath him once again. He smiles down at her in victory as she grunts at the change, nose rubbing against hers before kissing the bridge.

Amy moans as her husband thrusts harder, reaching underneath to tilt her hips just so, hitting her at the perfect angle over and over. Her legs tighten around him, hand reaching up to grip his hair as the sensations begin to overwhelm her. His pace has turned erratic, and she knows that he’s not far away from it either.

She twists her head, nipping gently at his earlobe as she whispers harder into his ear. HIs responding sigh leaves shivers down her skin as he cups the back of her head with his free hand, before raising himself onto his upper arms as he really begins to pound into her.

This. This is what she had been needing all afternoon. Her body begins to shake, desperate to move with him but also too incapacitated to do anything other than stay still, absorbing the push of his hips against hers as they both race towards completion. He fuses his mouth to hers, tongue thrusting against hers in perfect match to their movements below, and when they break away he whispers how much he loves her, how much he needs her, and how very sorry he is.

She answers him with a sharp cry as her climax takes over, fingers pulling at the roots of his hair as she tightens around him. It all proves to be too much for Jake, and while she continues to ride the high he joins her, face buried into Amy’s neck as he calls out her name, pouring himself into her as he stills.

Heartbeats continued to pound as they lay together, sweaty skin sliding onto sheets.

Heartfelt apologies would come later, along with steadfast declarations to listen for the other before jumping off the deep end. These were rules that they both knew, and for the most part stuck to. But every now and then, something would challenge their commandments, and today had been no different.

Proving to each other each time, that together they had something worth fighting for, was what set them apart. And they wouldn’t change that for anything.

#mine #smutfic #b99 fanfic #peraltiago #jake x amy #b99fanfic #cliche post prompts #peraltiago-babies #hope I did it justice!

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journalseekersofficial · 6 years

Text

The Seeker Files: The History of Clowns and Toons

Welcome back to The Seeker Files, my fellow humans and anomalies! Apologies for the weeklong silence, after the massive undertaking that was Resident Biohazard I had to step away from Journal Seekers for a bit but I didn’t want to leave you in the dark for too long. So right now we’ll get into one of the more odd things in the Journal Seekers universe: The Struggle of Clowns and Toons.

-Arson

Now the History of the Journal Seekers universe is quite different to that of the real world. A few examples being: Planet Earth is twice the size of our Earth, The Crusades never happened (technically, but that’s for another time.), and technological advancement happened far earlier in history than it did in our world. 100 years faster, in fact! By the 1800’s the Journal Seekers world was in the same technological era as us in the 1900’s! Which is funny because that is where this little ditty begins.

Our story begins back in 1800’s, with a woman by the name of Annabelle Affini and man by the name of Alan House. The two lived completely different lives yet unbeknownst to them their lives would intertwine. Annabelle lived most of her life in New York when her mother and father had immigrated back a few years ago, and despite the fact that living here was much better than where they came from, income was sparse and the family needed to do everything they can to continue to have a roof over their heads. Annabelle, understanding the predicament their family was in, tried their best to support their family as well.

Keep in mind this is the 1800’s and while the JS universe is different, some historical moments do mirror that of our own world. So Annabelle could just get a job, however she had a horrible streak of bad luck. Wherever she went she would fumble, fall, and tumble into danger and just barely make it out with her life. People who knew her didn’t know if she was the unluckiest girl on earth, or a blessed child for making it out of scraps alive. Her mother and father always coddled her because of this, making sure she was always safe and never ever put herself into danger. Annabelle on the other hand was persistent, and one day went to go help painting buildings to try and scrounge up some money. This moment would forever change Annabelle’s life, with what was supposed to be a simple errand becoming a cataclysm, and then into a performance. Clown Historians call this moment in time “The Raise of the Curtain” as any Clown performance beforehand was merely leading up to the main event.

Citizens looked on in horror as a small child was thrust into such danger, but as time passed that unease and fear turned into laughter and smiles. As Annabelle trudged forward, leaping from building to building, spilling paint everywhere and objects precariously falling from ropes, she felt something. For her entire life she knew that her streak of misfortune meant something and today she would find out what it was. Everytime something like this happened she’d always run instead of facing it head on, and while for most people it would have been suicide, for Annabelle it was something different. She stood still on the roof of a building, as a Piano had been launched into the air not moments before. For a moment the onlookers paused, their joviality returning to it’s origin of shock. As the Piano fell upon Annabelle’s head the crowd gasped, some even screamed. However, not even a few seconds later, Annabelle popped her head out of the front door of the building, spat out a tooth and shouted “I’m okay!”. The crowd went wild. It was then that Annabelle found her purpose as a clown. Now at this point in times, Clowns had already existed. However they were nothing more than roles they played in the real world. People who dressed up in colorful clothes and makeup to put on a show for the masses. However Annabelle began something more. As she grew up to become a Clown Legend she created what is now known as The Clown Ethos. The Clown Ethos’ original writer has been lost to time. Some theorize it was written by Annabelle herself, a student of hers, or simply someone who was dedicated to chronicling Annabelle’s passion and heart. The crux of the Clown Ethos is one simple saying: “Let them laugh with you, and you’ll know a joy greater than laughter.” After The Clown Ethos was created the way people saw Clowns was changed forever. Instead of just being performers, actors, comedians and stagefolk they were seen as beacons of some sort of holy joy. With some people even coining the term ‘Paladins of Comedy’. The more people believed in this strange Magic that clowns had, the stronger it became*.

*In the Journal Seekers Universe, belief can actually give power and bring things to life. This is what gives Gods their power. If you’ve ever played the game Okami, it works sorta like that.

But, in the shadows something was being created to rival Annabelle. Enter Alan House, the creator of House Animation. House Animation was a powerhouse Animation Studio at the time, mirroring that of Fleischer Animation in our world. Alan was born in New York same as Annabelle, but despite not sharing the same bad luck as Annabelle, Alan’s life wasn’t pleasant. He was born in the slums, with an absentee father and a mother who did everything she could so that Alan could lead a normal life. Alan’s mother gave everything for him, even working as a prostitute in order to make ends meet. As the years went by Alan grew to pity his own mother, knowing that she was giving her life to make sure that Alan could avoid the strife she had to live. The world was so cruel to Alan and his family he coped the only way he knew how: imagination.

Alan created thousands of characters in his own head, using them as a coping mechanism so that he could forget about the troubles of reality and make a world that was just for him. One where him and his mother could truly be happy. As Alan grew from a boy into a man he finally took his shot in becoming an animator, working for a small startup company trying to get off the ground. Sadly, once his first animation came to life on the big screen was also the day his mother had died. After that day, Alan eat, slept and breathed his own work in order to avoid the crushing reality of what his life had become. From that day forward House Animations became a juggernaut of animated film, with Alan leading the charge. Every day he spent time coming up with new ideas, new characters and putting his blood, sweat and tears into his work. His most famous character being Blythe the Dog, a small little animated Bulldog with a bowler cap and tie known for their wily attitude and bullheaded mentality. Children and Adults alike fell in love with Alan’s work but there was a problem. It wasn’t real.

With the art of Clowning becoming what it was around the same time, Alan knew he’d always be a step behind the curb. Back than Clowns didn’t have any sort of strange abilities or uncanny powers, they were just regular people. But now because of Annabelle and The Clown Ethos, Clowns could do anything that a Cartoon could do but in real life. Alan furiously tried so hard to bring his creations to life with theme parks, actors, toys and even animatronics (one of said animatronics being of one of Blythe’s secondary characters, Chaze the Cat. Although, that’s a story for another time…) yet nothing worked. As the years passed Alan’s passion became an obsession, the joy that he gave people becoming adrenaline, and he became addicted. As he grew more desperate, until one fateful night.

As Alan sat in his room, furiously scrawling on scraps of paper, he heard a voice. A deep, smooth and surly voice. A voice promising that he could make his dream become a reality. The voice Alan heard went by so many names, yet it simply asked to be referred to as Mr. Zebub. Zebub had promised Alan that if he gave up his blood, sweat and tears, he could bring Blythe to life, just as he wanted. Alan, not even second guessing the situation at all, agreed. Nobody knows of what happened to Alan afterwards. Some say he went through his own personal hell and came back a husk of a man, other believe he literally gave up his soul to put into that of Blythes. The answer remains a mystery, but one thing does not: After that night, Blythe came to life.

Blythe looked just as he did from his cartoons. A monochrome, four-foot tall dog with a bowler cap and tie who only spoke in growls and barks. With that, Alan had completed his life long goal and was prepared to show his work off to the masses. Needless to say, it was everything Alan could have ever dreamed of. Yet people who worked close with him said that despite that, he looked dead inside. During the first showing of “Blythe’s Alive!”, Alan simply sat in the crowd motionless, and silent. Rumor has it that once the first show had come to an end, and just as the crowd began to cheer, Alan simply got up from his seat and left.

After that night, Alan was never seen from again. Despite the fact that he was clearly still alive, and people still heard the sound of a pencil on paper and heavy breathing from his office, nobody had ever seen Alan’s face ever again. And the fate that was in store for Blythe was one nobody could have predicted. The humor of most House Animation cartoons tended to be very dark and grim, with almost every joke resulting in someone getting hurt, brutalized, and in some cases even killed. Blythe even had a trademark wheezy laugh that he’d do every time he saw someone get hurt. However, Blythe’s sense of humor didn’t translate well into the real world. As time passed the “Blythe’s Alive” show became more and more grim, with actors working with Blythe coming home with bruises, black eyes, and if they were lucky only one broken arm. As time passed less and less people began to show up to the show, and Blythe’s grew angry. One night, on a rehearsal before the last Blythe’s Alive show an event occured known as “The Black Comedy.”

That night, Blythe had created a new act for the troupe. One written by Blythe himself that he knew was going to rake in interest. In his own words “Someone is going to show up, even if it kills us.” Well he didn’t say it he kinda, growled it. In fact it’s a wonder how anyone understood him. Some theorize that once Blythe came to life he had a set of ethereal subtitles or something. Back on point, “Someone is going to show up, even if it kills us.”

And kill them it did. What was supposed to be a show rehearsal became a massacre, with every actor being brutalized by what Blythe thought were jokes. People were crushed under ten-ton weights, decapitated with mallets, torn limb from limb and had their limbs juggled, it was a living nightmare. What’s worse, is that with every actor killed, Blythe had devoured them whole and consumed their souls, becoming an overgrown, 10ft tall beast. Once the curtains raised for the final showing of Blythe’s Alive, the crowd met gazes with a horrific beast soaked in the blood of the innocent. As the crowd ran away, Blythe gave chase, trying to keep his audience captive and watch him for all eternity.

As he broke out of the theater, he wreaked havoc upon the city until he finally met gaze with the thing he hated the most. Annabelle. Ever since Blythe came to life he had an undying hatred for Annabelle, knowing that he was made to compete with her. As he went to rip into Annabelle’s flesh, she jumped into the air, tap danced on his head and started running. This began the final event in both Annabelle and Blythe’s lives. The event known as “The Eternal Showstopper.” To this day, The Eternal Showstopper continues, an game of cat and mouse that will last until the end of time. As Annabelle and Blythe ran through the streets of New York, Blythe tried one last time to get rid of her and dragged her into hell by the legs. Now the two remain in the Hellian Badlands, Annabelle acting as a sacrifice to keep the beast at bay.

As The Eternal Showstopper continued, Blythe began to throw himself into danger. Despite how much he tried to kill Annabelle, he always fell just short, always hurting himself in the process, whereas Annabelle never even lifted a finger to ever hurt Blythe. With each contraption that had backfired on Blythe, another geyser of black, inky blood spewed from his body. This black blood would soon create a river in the Hellian Badlands known as “The Ink Splot” from where the next era of Toons were born.

And that, my friends is the beginning of Clowns and Toons. Next time we’ll talk about Clowns and Toons and get into how they work, the powers they have, the different variants, and so on! Be vigilant, my fellow seekers and be wary! Laughter may be the best medicine, but you can overdose on anything.

-Arson

#The Seeker Files #Journal Seekers

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selflovestories · 3 years

Text

Struggles of Loving Yourself

It’s particularly warm and calm today, the rays of sunlight filled the whole room. I sat beside my bedroom window looking at the huge rice field owned by my grandparents. The beauty of the scenery that dances with the wind are outstanding. It’s been a week since I came here. I’ve learned and discovered a lot of things about myself with the help of my loving grandparents.

The door suddenly slams open and there, I saw my grandma, holding a cup of coffee. She’s wearing a floral dress partnered with a floral headband, her lips are as red as the roses. “Is that for me?” I asked. She walks toward the room and placed the coffee on the mini table in front of me then she sat in my bed. “Yes, sweetheart” she said with a genuine worry in her eyes. I sit beside my grandma and hugged her. “Oh, sweetheart” she hugged me back.

We sat there for a little while; just hugging each other. The warm sensation that hugs brought to our body sends calmness and peace within. I don’t know if it’s just me but I really felt peaceful and calm when someone hugs me.

I let go of the hug and take a glance at my grandma’s eyes. It’s like a snowflake trapped in the sea, it’s beautiful. “Why did you bring me a coffee?” I asked her. She looked at the coffee then looked at me, “You didn’t come down for breakfast and I thought you were still asleep” she chuckles “The smell of coffee wakes me up”.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to worry. It’s just that I have a lot going on with myself and in my mind. I want to have a little time to myself, I supposed?”

She wandered her eyes around my room and said, “You are very much like me. I thought you were like your grandpa but it turned out that you get a lot of my characteristics. Anne, let me tell you a story”

Yes, story time. This is what I like most when I’m visiting my grandparents. There were a lot of stories prepared for me and it wasn’t just a story, it was their story. “What is this story all about this time?” she put her finger on her mouth and hush me. I mouthed okay and focus on the story she was about to tell.

“When I was about your age, I’ve had a lot of struggles with myself. I’ve met a lot of people and I tried to copy their way of speaking, their personality, and their likes or habits. I have a lot of friends and one of them is Chaze, she’s beautiful, funny and smart. Everyone likes her and I like her too. So, I tried to be more like her. I tried to copy her funny character so people will like me too.”

She took the coffee that she brought for me and sips a little. I laughed because I thought it was for me. Her eyebrows met and she smiled foolishly “A good story needs a good coffee, don’t laugh at me”. I raised both of my hands and said okay. She continued with her story “I thought people liked me too because I became funny like her but I was wrong. They’ve noticed that I was copying Chaze and they ask me ‘Why are you copying Chaze? Don’t copy her because you will never be like her’. I was so ashamed of myself at that time and I lost track of who I am.

Every night, I cried and ask God ‘Who am I, Lord? Because I don’t know who I am anymore”. I prayed and I prayed to God to guide me in knowing who am I. After years of struggling with myself, I got the answer.” Her eyes got watery and she looks over the window.

“Acceptance and embracing of who I am is the answer. I’m so focused on getting people’s attention and validation to the point that I lost sight of how unique I am. From that point, I promised God that I will love myself even more. I will accept and embrace my flaws and uniqueness. I will change, not because I want people’s attention or validation, but because I want to be a better person. I will celebrate my friends’ uniqueness. I will no longer copy others’ characteristics or personalities because if I tried I will not be myself. It isn’t me, it is not God who made us to be”

My grandma’s face is a reflection of peace, and I never thought that she had problems like that. I thought that she was born perfect and flawless but I was wrong.

“Now that I’ve got my answer to my questions, I thought it’s gonna be easy for me but it was not. There were a lot of struggles in loving myself, in accepting my uniqueness, in embracing who I am. It was not easy for me and it will not be easy for you too. But I will tell you now, hold on because it will be worth it.”

How hard it will be? I glance at the greenery over the window. I wish we are just like the trees who are peacefully standing and dancing with the wind. Giving shelter to the people who need them, a place where you can rest and relax. Why is it so hard to be human?

“Anne, listen. I will tell you the things that you’ll encounter when you started loving yourself or embracing who you are. But even if I tell it to you right now, it will be still hard” I bit my lips and turned to my grandma. “Okay, tell me.” she smiled.

“I will tell you three struggles that I’ve encountered and how will you respond to them. First, it will be a rough start. You will fall on your past struggles and as for me, it was copying other people. There were a lot of times that I fall to temptation in copying them all over again. But you have to be nice to yourself and loving yourself is not just a one-time decision, it is a daily decision of saying yes to loving yourself. Don’t ever think that you are not making a progress because the daily decision you make in loving yourself is progress. Baby steps are okay, slowly but surely.” I asked her a question “Isn’t it tiring? To fall all over again in your bad habits?”. She answered quickly and full of confidence, “Yes, it’s tiring. That’s why you need to be nicer to yourself. If you can be nice to people who made a mistake on you then you can do it on yourself too. Be more gracious to yourself.”

This is really hard. Grandma continued, “The second one is there will be a lot of questions about yourself, doubt will rise. In the middle of the journey, you will start asking ‘Is this really who I am?’ Am I not selfish in loving myself or in prioritizing myself?’. What I did is that I anchored my identity to the One that’s never changing, not on the material things or the social construct that this world offers. I prayed that He will give me a company that will walk with me in this journey. If I am all alone in this situation, it’s gonna be real trouble. So whenever these questions of doubts started rising in my mind, I call to God first and then to my friends. That helped me a lot”

I raised another question to her, “What if I don’t have friends that I can run to? And, I don’t trust God enough to handle my problems?”

She answered, “Run to people whom you trust the most. I can’t push you in believing God, I respect your beliefs and decisions in life. It’s for you to find out who are the people that can help you, there will always be one”. I nodded, she’s right we are not alone and there will be always one person who will be with us. “What is the third one?”

“The last one is starting again, it’s hard to start again when you are tired. Like when your plans didn’t go the way it was planned and you need to start again, that was hard. This is what I did, I changed my perspective in starting all over again. Changing your mindset on things is hard, it takes time and practice. But don’t worry dear, once you get used to it, everything will fall into place. So, instead of looking at it as starting “again” I looked at it as a ‘fresh start’. The ‘again’ word is what makes me feel tired and unmotivated to continue what I started. The word ‘fresh start’ brings me excitement and motivation to continue what I started. See? It’s the way you look at things.”

I held the coffee and drank it. It was not hot anymore, it’s cold but it tasted okay. “Yes, it the way we look at things. I have a mixed feeling about that phase of life where we need to start loving ourselves. I have excitement and fear at the same time. I hope it will turn out okay for me too just like yours.”

I felt the warm hands of my grandma in my face, she cupped my face like I’m a four-year-old child. “Trust yourself dear”

- Joanne Karunungan Bariring

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comicteaparty · 6 years

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October 18th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on October 18th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT. The chat focused on The Origin Story by Carolin Reich.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!

Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing The Origin Story by Carolin Reich~! (https://tapas.io/series/The-Origin-Story)

Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

one of my favorite scenes is actually really depressing XD but i really like the small part of a scene after cosima beats joreal and velver passes by her looking for her. https://tapas.io/episode/974705 something about the illustration on this page is so expertly crafted. like, you can just take one look and see cosima is in shock and kind of dead instead, and the fact its conveyed in such a brief and brillaint way amazes me.

Superjustinbros

Hi there!

RebelVampire

hey SJ

Superjustinbros

Glad to be here

RebelVampire

feel free to share any scenes that you were found of.

Superjustinbros

https://tapas.io/episode/1182515

Here's a pretty silly one

RebelVampire

yes! i really liked the relationship between chaze and his brother. theyre so different in personality. and you kind of have to wonder what happened in the past that caused his brother to leave home and essentially leave chaze in charge. cause chaze is not exactly whod i was as a king necessarily XD

Superjustinbros

Heehee X3

Pretty much

RebelVampire

did you just like it for the silliness or was there something else?

Superjustinbros

the silliness

RebelVampire

any part of the silliness that particularly entertained you or just the whole package?

Superjustinbros

I'd say the "head shake" bit

RebelVampire

yeah thats definitely a great illustration right there~!

Superjustinbros

Indeed

And giant draco daddy

RebelVampire

yeah i liked how the dragon was treated more like a pest than as a dragon XD

Superjustinbros

Dragon jsut wants his pumpkins for Halloween

RebelVampire

in the meantime, another scene i liked was in the elven court where velver did manipulative mumbo jumbo towards nocturne by playing to her fears on being the proxy for chaos. that was just some beautiful a-ok emotional stake driving right there. though i do wonder how much of it was on purpose or if velver was being a jerk. but i like the fact that i dont know for sure because it keeps velver as a bit enigmatic

Superjustinbros

https://tapas.io/episode/1152958 Ooh, so there's some type of modern tech in this world too?

RebelVampire

ummm, well in that part of the world its just cause cosima brought her phone

Superjustinbros

lol right

RebelVampire

another scene im fond of is when nocturne she tells Chaze "nope you gotta figure out how to get yourself out" after freeing him. Chaze has some really great expressions. But i also like the story itself turns my expectations on their head by having Chaze really actually mostly figure out how to escape himself.

Superjustinbros

Yeah that's a good scene

RebelVampire

speaking of head turns, and not so much a scene, but i like that cosima orchestrated her own escape from the brothel and noped out. like im used to stories where the protagonist misbehaves only a fraction (like explore the brothel after being told no dont do that). but cosima just nopes out of there and heads for home, which is a fitting reaction for someone her age.

Superjustinbros

Yeah.

At least it's appropriate for Cosima's age.

Since I see lots of story make the young characters far more intelligent/capable for someone their age

RebelVampire

yes, so i like that she decided to try and nope after all. granted it backfired as it should have, but still the attempt was made

mathtans

I will be another... 15-20 minutes. FYI.

RebelVampire

kay take your time. well be here but i hope you can make it.

mathtans

I liked the rattling off of "chosen one" artifacts like mascots and silver crystals and then be all, if I don't get those, then nevermind.

Superjustinbros

Oh hey Math(edited)

RebelVampire

oh yeah i forgot about that moment in the larger scheme. but that was a really great moment. and again, kind of a more realistic reaction in a sense. cause i think those sorts of things are what ppl expect if they get told theyre the chosen one.

QUESTION 2. Throughout the comic, Velver seems to be up to his own sorts of goals. What do you think Velver’s goals even are? Are they personal, or is this the will of the supposed Church? What do these goals have to do with manipulating the elves to war with the merpeople? What outcome do you think people are hoping to achieve by starting it? Who is Kader, and what’s their intent with Cosima/Riga? Do you feel Velver is loyal to Kader, or is Velver playing the field to achieve his own ends? Lastly, how does Velver know Jorel, and why did Jorel call Velver a traitor?

i will try and tackle the last one first. i feel as if velver must not have always been part of the church by the fact hes a traitor. instead, he joined the church later when he saw the people he was with were "evil." though personally i feel like jorel's group wants to stop the prophecy a different way versus what the church is up to? but this is mostly based on the fact i cant necessarily picture jorel as part of this so-called church

i could be wrong and its totally opposite and the hunters dont realize velver is a double agent who hates the church

im gonna go out on the limb and say i think velver is playing both fields and trying to decide for himself what the best outcome is. and that while he's doing kader's bidding for now, he ultimately is after something else that makes following kader necessary.

Superjustinbros

I second the "prophecy a different way" part, seems like a possible reason.

RebelVampire

i definitely also feel that kader is definitely for sure evil. cause something about the breaking of strings and velver's reactions makes me pretty sure they're a tyrant. XD which makes me pretty sure that they actually dont care about light beating the dark. they just want cosima's powers to do cool power things. maybe take over a kingdom

actually thatd make sense for why they want the elves and the merpeople to war

let the elves and the merpeople tire themselves out

then swoop in with cosima/riga saying "were here to take over"

insta win

Superjustinbros

I mean who doesn't want to rule over a kingdom

mathtans

Okaaaay, hiiii. Busy week, didn't get all the way through "Destiny", but very impressed by the German origins here. Gonna scroll up and make random remarks now.

Re: The scene after the dead parents, yeah, that whole section somehow rang really true, the whole "my parents will be so annoyed I don't want to have to deal" morphing into the "what is even my life now". Also, kudos on illustrations in general.

RebelVampire

yeah. i like that it continues as well to when cosima got caught by the hunters. and she just sits there like "what is life what do i do"

mathtans

I'm not at the brother scene yet. ^.^ Did not expect the dragon thing. I wonder how people who do the swimming/water thing end up with dragons, that we associate with the air.

Yeah. I mean, not only are your parents dead, you come face to face with their killer. Yipes.

Yeah, Cosima's portrayed well as a teenager.

RebelVampire

i did wonder that too. we havent seen the merpeople yet in the sense of their city, so maybe they actually live above water unlike all past precedent merpeople or something

i did think it was ironic

but i also thought it was ironic anyway cause how does chaze of all ppl have a dragon XD

mathtans

Velver's an interesting cookie. Joining up later makes sense, particularly if that made him a "traitor" to some. I feel like he's his own agent, rather than working for anyone else... not necessarily that he's trying to engineer the best outcome either, just that he thinks he has some role to play, prophecy wise.

Superjustinbros

I wonder what the merpeople even look like

unless they already appeared and I jsut missed it

mathtans

Seahorses are called dragons of the sea, right? Maybe that's how they hatch.

RebelVampire

chaze is a mer person

Superjustinbros

ooh

RebelVampire

as is his brother XD

Superjustinbros

Okay then X3

RebelVampire

and i guess thats possible if the dragons are secretly just sea horses

mathtans

I think Velver's been reading the ancient runes. I also have my own crazy theory...

Namely that which one of them is good/order or evil/chaos hasn't necessarily been decided yet. Velver's pegging Cosima for the former, but it could be the other girl, so he's goading her too.

RebelVampire

oh thats a really good theory. that either one is capable. cause i mean tbf chaos doesnt have to be evil nor does order have to be good

mathtans

It's like, "I'm going to start a war, and let's see which of them handles it better".

Superjustinbros

lel

mathtans

It also might explain why Jorel wanted Cosima dead, he (or others of his kind) have pegged her as the chaotic one.

RebelVampire

could be

tbf maybe jorel wasnt even ordered to kill cosima

maybe hes just like velver and think he has his own role to play

Superjustinbros

Maybe so

RebelVampire

and he chose the psycho role

mathtans

Could be. I'm not sure I totally buy he's a psycho though... he's strangely ordered in his thinking. It's like, I gotta do this, and this, and tie up loose ends. He just, I dunno, has no soul?

(Maybe that's the same thing.)

RebelVampire

i mostly label him psycho cause he heartlessly killed her parents XD

mathtans

OH, hmmmm... what if Velver and Jorel were originally the rebirth of order and chaos, and they messed it up, so now it's up to the women? How old are they anyway?

Rebel: Fair.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. Many of the events of the comic come about for one reason: Cosima and Nocturne are destined to fight according to a prophecy and past precedence of their past selves. Do you think The Origin Story about Riga and her sister is true, or do you think there’s some critical information missing from it? Do you believe the prophecy is destined to come to pass, or are Cosima and Nocturne going to find a way to avoid fighting each other? Why do you think Cosima was kidnapped as a child but not Nocturne? In present times, what do you think will happen when Cosima catches up with Nocturne? Do you think Cosima will learn to control her powers inherited from Riga better, or will they ultimately be her undoing? What about Nocturne? Will she overcome her own issues regarding the prophecy?

i dont think that old. but i mean i guess its possible. though they must of messed up real bad cause neither velver or jorel killed each other.

so im saying it now cause of that flashback cosima had at some point (which i dont remember where). i think this is one of those situations where what ppl believe is a lie. someone else hurt riga and someone kept turning the new incarnations against each other. and eventually it devolved into a myth and such, as myths tend to do

mathtans

Well, the killing each other is just how things are now, once it's all escalated. ^.^

There's probably key missing information... maybe they're actually TRIPLETS.

RebelVampire

dun dun dun without the 3rd sister there are no negotians. jsut blind filled rage

mathtans

Yeah, there has been some interesting flashback/imagery stuff. Like when she reached for someone, and the image shattered and it was Velver (if memory serves).

I wonder if Cosima's friends have a role to play too. Maybe in a big twist, it was really one of them.

RebelVampire

they definitely have a role to play. they are suspicious af, though idk if you got to that part yet

mathtans

Ahh, if they appear in "Destiny" then no. I only got to the bit after Velver and Jorel talked. (I feel like they're related, incidentally.)

Speaking of though, the plot has been very clever in rolling out it's cast. Gradual enough to come to terms with each new character, but teasing others that end up with bigger roles later on. I'm reminded of an early scene when Velver was spying on Cosima - and Nocturne was spying on him. Layers.

RebelVampire

yeah i really like the pacing on it too. i dont have to spend an immense time memorizing a billion names at once.

Superjustinbros

At least the names aren't too hard to memorize.

mathtans

I'm still horrible with names. It's a gift.

I imagine it scans differently too when you're seeing it as it comes out versus binging, but I felt like the pacing was done well for the cast.

Superjustinbros

i feel ya Math (edited)

RebelVampire

on the side topic of nocturne, i feel like left to their own devices she and cosima wouldn't fight it out to the death. instead theyd be all sister bondy bond, have some tea, etc. so i think for sure its not they themselves who bring the prophecy to pass, its the plans of others who try to grab at the power and turn them on each other. but i also think cosima and nocturne will be obstinate and keep hugging each other screaming no

mathtans

I'm not so sure about that. Mainly because they might not always have control over their bodies. Like when Cosima went crazy on Jorel for self preservation. Could happen again with unintended consequences.

Nocturne probably also resents Cosima for growing up without so much responsibility, maybe also for having actual parents who aren't apparently trapped in crystals.

(...is reading a bit further in the background btw...)

RebelVampire

idk if nocturne would resent cosima for it. cause i mean, at least nocturne's parents are still probably alive in their crystals and werent viciously murdered. though youre right that riga may have other ideas about their bonding and just take over. but then again riga seems to know what velver is up to so riga might not act either.

the bigger danger on seeing nocturne i think is seeing the queen of elves

cause shes the one who might not take kindly to cosima XD

mathtans

Well, yeah, once Nocturne learns of the murdering that might change things. ^.^ There's a lot of variables in play I suppose.

That said, I will willingly ship Nocturne with Cosima's friends.

RebelVampire

LOL i dont think i can get behind that ship. mostly cause i expect cosima's friends to die. :"D

mathtans

That light haired girl is kind of precious though, with her theories.

I wonder what she'd make of seeing the town.... ... and now I'm picturing her at the brothel, I shouldn't do that.

Also, shipping all the girls in the brothel.

RebelVampire

yes those are more acceptable ships. the brothel girls are probably safe. and head brothel girl has a whip.

also i found it, that scene with cosima's friends being super suspicious. it was actually in puppeter

https://tapas.io/episode/915705

mathtans

Right, the fact that they knew Jorel. I thought that was weird.

It's fine though, I'll still ship them with each other! All the ships!

RebelVampire

yeah. whatever organization jorel is from theyre clearly from

QUESTION 4. Among the larger threads rests a plethora of other possible curiosities to be solved. Who exactly were Cosima’s parents? Were they working for someone from the beginning, or did they somehow get wrapped up in everything? Who are Cosima’s friends considering they lament that their comfortable lives have changed since Cosima left? Who is Jorel, and why are his orders to kill Cosima? What is the deal with the elves trapped in crystals? As far as the plot goes, how might the Hunters affect what’s going on in general? What about Chaze? Will he be able to stop the war, or is his destiny meant to be something greater than that? In general, what are your theories for the future? What do you think or want to see happen?

mathtans

Are they from that organization though? Because if so, they know where Cosima is. Why bother sending Jorel.

RebelVampire

i think jorel is more firmly acting on his own

since the friends didnt know of any death order

mathtans

He was saying he couldn't go back without being sure she was dead though, or someone would be upset.

I think.

RebelVampire

so maybe the friends didnt get the message? and theyre going to show up going wtf guys

mathtans

Holy Hannah! Kader's more psychotic than Jorel, she doesn't even kill directly. (Just got caught up.) Like geeeeeez.

Rebel: Maybe. There was the implication that they could return as well.

I suspects events will prevent that, but they thought it was an option.

RebelVampire

maybe. idk. i need more data in this case. i still think jorel is working more on his own though. cause maybe the person who was gonna be upset is actually gonna be upset regardless. and be like wtf jorel why did you kill riga you dolt

but yeah kader is psychotic, or at the very least tyrannical

velver did not necessarily make a good switch

i really want to know whats up with the elves in the crystals. like was there a spell that backfired and the queen just doesnt care O_O

mathtans

Maybe, yeah... also that mention of having the same problem in another 10 years makes me think once again that if the battle doesn't happen the spirits move on again. Or something.

Yeah, maybe the elves in the crystals had a disease? So it's like suspended animation? Because it was mentioned that there were fewer elves than merfolk.

Or maybe they just couldn't make enough food for the city, so this means fewer mouths to feed. Swords apparently grow in the crystals, but I guess vegetables don't.

RebelVampire

maybe it is a disease. or maybe this is actually why riga was kidnapped. cause riga caused it and jorel's group was like "welp we found riga. did you see that giant crystal explosion?"

im not sure what mention youre talking about with the 10 years thing tho

i must of missed it

mathtans

The most recent update. Third panel from the end.

Riga likes making crystals. Everyone needs a hobby.

RebelVampire

hmmm from the phrasing i feel like the implication is more that nocturne will kill riga? and kader will have to wait a decade for riga to be reborn again so they have to restart the kidnapping process. but i could be wrong.

mathtans

As to the future, I really don't think I can call it. Too many moving pieces. I also wonder a bit if maybe the Circle's hiding elements of the prophecy, accidentally or otherwise.

Ahh, I see... no, that's possible. Doesn't necessarily negate the Velver/Jorel reincarnation issue though, maybe the host doesn't need to die.

(Yes, I'm back to that theory.)

RebelVampire

its a possible theory. though like i say theyd really have to mess it up for this to be a thing. i do think parts of the prophecy are hidden

though maybe its a bit of both

in that theyre purposefully hiding some of it

but then theres parts that they just missed

and are gonna go through their archives and go "oops"

mathtans

It was censored by the clerics.

Incidentally, just want to shout-out here too for the translator. I noticed the comic's originally in German, and gets translated. Can't be simple coming up with the terms like for the "virtual loop" forest.

(Maybe the original German prophecy got translated so many times it's being misinterpreted. )

RebelVampire

i am curious what the original german says now XD

mathtans

I can't speak German. They have neat words for things though.

Okay, final theory. In a massive plot twist, Cosima's cat app saves the day. All the outside world needed was technologies to unify the different groups.

Oh! And shout-out to some of the fun cartoony poses. I feel like those would be fun to draw. (Or maybe not draw, but see once drawn?)

RebelVampire

haha i did kind of hope it would go that way tbh. that by the end the worlds recombine and they figure out that technology is awesome and puts less pressure on the whole magic business.

so i mean if cosima's cat app requires this to happen, so be it

mathtans

I wonder if there's anywhere for her phone to charge. Or if she can use magic for that.

RebelVampire

i wonder if vampire guy we saw briefly who seemed to be from cosima's world has the cat app

that would be hilarious. has all these great goddess powers, uses them to recharge her phone

mathtans

It's the simple things in life sometimes.

RebelVampire

well if cosima visits the brothel again, she cant disappoint. theyll want to see that cat app again

mathtans

Yis. That will be after the Origin Story... the Sequel Story.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!

Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Carolin Reich, as well, for making The Origin Story. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Carolin Reich’s efforts however you’re able to~!

Read and Comment: https://tapas.io/series/The-Origin-Story

Carolin Reich’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/CarolinReich

Carolin Reich’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/A212D0X

Carolin Reich’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/Ensyis

Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club

Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about A Drift of Souls by Davpow. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, October 25th, from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!

Comic’s Main Site: https://adriftofsouls.com/

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #bookclub #book club #webcomic bookclub #webcomic book club #comic tea party #ctp #the origin story #carolin reich

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7grandmel · 2 months

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Todays rip: 26/02/2024

Shopping on Star Road

Season 2 No Album Release (Read More) Game Over (OST Version) - Super Mario World

Ripped by sadkey

youtube

Requested by bobthetacocat! @bobthetacocat

There's a part of me that really doesn't quite know how to approach this rip in particular, for a few reasons. Sure, I've covered hip-hop themed rips on the blog before, including other lo-fi ones like Yoshi's Cookie World and Stickerbrush State of Mind - but with those and others, I've felt like I've had a story attached to them to tell, to sort of make up for my lack of knowledge on the rap scene in general. I still heard the name "Lil Peep" around from time to time, but knew nothing about the guy or his work - and further wasn't even aware that he's now been away from us for close to seven years, after his passing in 2017. Like I said with Through the F-F-Fire and the F-F-Flames, there's an added difficulty in talking about someone's legacy after the fact when you never really felt like you knew them to begin with. Those were, at least, the thoughts I had when receiving the request to cover Shopping on Star Road. And then I listened to it - and then, I dug deeper.

On SoundCloud's official Wikipedia page, Lil Peep is one of ten artists listed as examples under the "SoundCloud Rap" sub category, a label many of you are likely more familiar with than I've ever been. I recognized the names of several of the other listed examples, of course - XXXTentacion, Playboi Carti, Juice Wrld - yet never put it together that they were all born under the same umbrella, the umbrella of SoundCloud as a platform. This community formed of creators expressing themselves with as much honesty and raw emotion as possible, a sort of re-emergence of emo expressions as told by individual rising stars...The more I read, the more fascinated I became - and, of course, given my brainrot, I couldn't help but draw parallels to the SiIvaGunner channel itself.

Much of the joy of SoundCloud as a platform is how...unrestricted it is, as a platform. There's little in the way of licenses, little moderation, no reason for quality control - from what I've gathered without using it, its able to act much like your average social media in that you can post practically anything (that isn't hate speech) and have a chance of getting noticed. There's little pressure to perform, little direct monetization: it is, in its purest form, an audio playground. The idea of "SoundCloud Rap" came about from that culture as a result, to just perform and release something without the pressure of a perfect mix, of perfect vocals and mastering, effectively "venting" in the form of music. There's an aura of sincerity to rap music like Lil Peep's Star Shopping, with a simple beat that sets an immaculate vibe alone, with vocals that speak from the heart, with flow carried by emotion despite the music's simplicity.

And, like, I know it sounds a bit insincere to draw a connection between this thing that I'm not very invested in, and the thing this blog is about that I am VERY invested in, but...that sort of sincerity has always been a huge part of SiIvaGunner's appeal to me. Be it in stupid bits where the mask of the parody occasionally slips with a laugh, such as Can't Say Goodbye to Yesterday - as performed by Bob Dylan, or mashups where you can feel that each source was picked out with affection like vs SAYU (Based Version), there's an aura to many SiIvaGunner rips that make you feel...connected to the people behind them. A connection not all too dissimilar to the one formed between the artist and listener with music as unfiltered as SoundCloud's often is.

There's that, and of course that several of the team's oldest rippers, such as toonlink of Dr. Soulja fame, initially got their start doing the very same thing they do now on SiIvaGunner, but on SoundCloud. It was this messing around with other "rippers" as part of what was then called the "SoundClown" community that SiIvaGunner creator Chaze the Chat cites as the primary inspiration for starting the channel all the way back in Season 1. With this shared history in mind, Shopping on Star Road gains a new sort of meaning - a sendoff from one side of SoundCloud's old guard from another, in tribute to a rapper who passed just as SiIva's own first season ended. It obviously helps that ripper sadkey has a fantastic ear for what he does, and would later go on to make one of the channel's most underrated rips of all time in Unstable Connection. sadkey, Lil Peep, the sentimentality born from the shared history on SoundCloud, and the Super Mario World Game Over theme itself, come together to make Shopping on Star Road one of the most soul-healing listens on the channel.

I never knew much of Lil Peep, nor know much of just how much he impacted people. But I can feel a connection to both him and the people who miss him through Shopping on Star Road and its comment section alone.

#todays siivagunner #season 2 #siivagunner #siiva #tentative rip name #sadkey #Youtube #lil peep #star shopping #soundcloud #soundcloud rapper #mumble rap #super mario world #super mario #smw #snes music #lofi hip hop #lofi aesthetic

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