#so sorry but it has no appeal to me especially because i'm not fully a woman.there is one variant i like that i won't share | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tubbytarchia · 1 month

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Just a bunch of Doc and Jimmy thoughts as to why I find them so appealing and endearing. I wanna draw them more but regardless I have too many thoughts on them to ever visualize them all. It's a lot and very self-indulgent. This is your warning

TLDR Jimmy in a father/son type of dynamic (as opposed to a romantic relationship) would do him good and Doc would be very perceptive and gentle and awesome about it

These are pretty much all reliant on a hypothetical scenario in which Jimmy is on Hermitcraft (after Secret Life?), temporarily or permanently or accidentally etc. I'm also gonna refer to Jimmy's relationships with Tango, Scott etc as romantic just for clarity

- Firstly I don't mind them as a ship, its all cool with me (cause I know at least a few of you ship them haha), but to me their absolute main appeal is the fatherly aspect. It being a father/son dynamic eliminates so many of Jimmy's struggles off the bat - ones that are prevalent in his romantic connections, mainly the inherent anxiety and inability to open up to his partners as a result (at least fully)

- Because of said anxiety, none of Jimmy's partners up to this hypothetical unexplained point of time would fully "get" him. Even if Jimmy trusts them, he's been conditioned to see himself as the faulty link by default and the people around him, however good they are and however much they COULD help, aren't the type to pick up on or be able to understand exactly what he needs (Tango's rather oblivious, Martyn's hot-headed etc), and Jimmy isn't exactly going to tell them in the headspace that he's in, he doesn't know how to. Yet Doc has had one, ONE notable interaction with him, and in that one interaction, even as Jimmy's just jokingly calling for Etho, Doc immediately and immaculately picks up on what Jimmy needs: "I want to take you into my hands and take you to a safe place"

- There's a quote(?) exchange that goes "You're free, (referring to a bird whose gate has just been opened), why don't you fly away?" followed by the bird "the cage is all I know". Sorry to use some "I'm 14 and this is deep" quote but that's just Jimmy. He needs time and gentleness, and a safe place that'd allow for that. A safe place to heal until he's ready to step out into the world of his own accord. He's helped out of the cage with patience and understanding, not by pushing him. Where Doc understands to be patient, some of Jimmy's partners post-3L would push - of course just trying to help but failing to grasp Jimmy's needs fully - or fail to realize there's (still) a cage there at all. Sorry what are we talking about again

- Add-on to the above points: Doc being able to pick up on Jimmy's wants and needs without verbalization. He'd be able to offer Jimmy desired comfort, and, comparing to Tango for example, without their time necessarily being cut short and without the failure to recognise that it's something Jimmy continues to need. (I've said it before but Tango's oblivious, and that's partially why he and Jimmy work well together, but it also means that he doesn't pick up on everything, especially when not near and soulbound to Jimmy, and by virtue of being a romantic partner, Jimmy's too anxious to ask for help too, because of previous relationship experiences). Doc would pick up on it all though, eliminating Jimmy's need to explicitly ask for help, because that's the one thing he's not able to communicate however desperately he's needed to to kickstart any kind of healing

- We all know how Doc gets when he's being a dad so. This father/son dynamic only means more softness and gentleness from Doc you know... Again, something Jimmy is in desperate need for!! And what he's gotten from people like Tango as well, but once again, this isn't a romantic relationship so Jimmy's feelings about physical affection are a bit different. Doc would have the utmost mindfulness of approaching Jimmy in any physical touch scenario though and never push or pressure. He always watches out for signs of discomfort, and will hardly touch him if he thinks that there's a chance it could upset Jimmy further. He understands that Jimmy needs time and patience and he doesn't want for him to draw more into himself, thus reversing any progress they might've made, especially if in Jimmy's current mindset, an even remotely unwanted approach could make him feel unsafe. If there are defenses that he's learned to and needs to keep up, then Doc won't take that away from him and give him space as needed

- When Doc IS to offer physical touch and such, he'd still have the utmost gentleness and pay attention to where he's situated near Jimmy just so he can ensure that he's using his organic arm to pat him or to have the organic half of his face towards him, not only to minimize intimidation but to also put them on more equal footing - If Doc can just look over and read Jimmy's eyes at any moment, he wants Jimmy to be able to see his too to help him feel more comfortable (and thus encourage opening up)

- Back to the "safe place" thing specifically, Doc would totally take Jimmy under his wing and thus also into his base - his huge and scary full-of-machines barely-resembling-a-house-to-any-degree base. Jimmy would be naturally intimidated by Doc and his base in kind, but just as he grows more used to big scary goat man, he grows more used to big scary goat man base. He'd be intimidated but not past the point of intrigue, and combined with his need to prove himself, Jimmy would very much try to study Doc's machines and learn the layout of his base etc. I'm tickled by the idea of no one understanding Doc's base as per usual, except this one lost guy he took under his wing

If Jimmy were to mess anything up (he inevitably would I'm sure) Doc would be all grumbly about it in the moment but never hold a grudge towards him. And Jimmy would either flee but quickly return and/or be very insistent on making it up to Doc, which Doc would refuse because there's no need

- Again, with Jimmy's need to prove himself but also out of genuine interest, Jimmy would very much try redstone whilst at Doc's. He'd ask Doc to be honest and not to praise his work just to be polite, but Doc would believe in him and find his efforts genuinely endearing and worthy of praise for the work that he'd have put into it. Not once would he have complimented Jimmy's work without meaning it. I don't think he'd be able to live with himself if he stooped to disingenuousness like that (though Jimmy wouldn't know that)

- Doc would be protective and rightfully so. If he were to see Jimmy bullying becoming too prevalent, he'd very much step in to say that that's enough of that. He might tease Jimmy a little himself, very lightheartedly, but otherwise not find much comedy in it. And we all know how he holds grudges if he's to single anyone out for going over the line... Jimmy would be opposed to Doc calling anyone out or anything of the like and Doc very much wants to respect Jimmy's wishes but... There's no way he isn't going to speak his mind at least out of Jimmy's earshot

- Doc has always understood that Jimmy's in need of help, but of course he can only entail so much without hearing it from the man himself. And when Jimmy does inevitably open up, Doc would be totally taken aback by the amount of things weighing on Jimmy's heart, and just out of disbelief he'd go "and you haven't told anyone??", which may make Jimmy curl in on himself a bit, but Doc would be quick to reassure that he's not questioning Jimmy's actions nor blaming him for bottling his feelings up, merely expressing sadness that Jimmy hasn't felt like he could tell anyone up until now. Doc would remember everything he's told with precision and keep it all in mind constantly. Very self indulgent but for example, Jimmy having felt the need to dress up as a maid as payback just to stay on SOS would make Doc pay even more attention to any potential signs of discomfort in Jimmy presenting himself to others or feeling pressured to do something etc

- Before reaching the point of being able to open up, Jimmy would inevitably tear up at some point when he gets stuck thinking about just how kindly he's being treated for whatever reason that remains a mystery to him. Even if he tried to hide it, Doc would immediately notice the unusual body language, or something like his headwing moving to cover his face. And he would become very panicked lol, quickly reassuring Jimmy about whatever he thinks caused the reaction, like his redstone attempts for example, only for Jimmy to be unable to express why he's really crying, but at the very least Doc would understand that there's more to it and will just do his best to comfort him regardless

- Jimmy has and will absolutely call people his dad as a joke, but when he inevitably refers to Doc as such by accident, he'd become embarrassed about it. It'd be awesome and cute I think

- Ok so Hermitcraft, of course Tango's there!! And with no death game looming over his or Jimmy's heads. Still, that doesn't erase Jimmy's anxiety even when he opens up to Doc about it. Doc would offer suggestions for how Jimmy could approach Tango (And maybe Pearl too), but if Jimmy expresses his inability to do so because of anxiety and such, then Doc will let it go and just comfort or reassure him for the time being instead. He'd ask if he should talk to Tango all menacing and Jimmy would be vehemently opposed to the idea lol. Doc would probably still take it up with Tango at some point and Jimmy wouldn't find out until much later into him and Tango talking again, at which point he'd become embarrassed that Tango had to deal with that (but of course there would have never been any malice involved and Tango can easily laugh about it). Added drama if we go with the idea that Jimmy's time on HC is limited which would only stress him out more about talking to Tango

- Doc would pay so much attention to Jimmy's wings' welfare. He'd ask Grian and do all kinds of research on his own too to make sure they're properly cared for whilst fully understanding their personal importance and potential intimacy that caring for them entails, giving Jimmy whatever space he needs whilst still keeping an eye on his wings. In a different hypothetical scenario where Doc is in the Life series and not much else is changed, he'd take note of Jimmy's wings being clipped (3L, LL), then growing (DL, LimL), and then becoming ragged (SL, with Jimmy's increasing hostility, restlessness etc)

- You are insane for reading till this point. Take my hand, we can be insane together

#blabber #Doc&Jimmy

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luna-rainbow · 2 months

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I'm sorry if this is an odd question. I'm new to the Steve/Bucky fandom and only recently started reading fics relating to them. How come most fics tend to favor Peggy and write her to be a sympathetic character? Most of the fandom that I've interacted with agree that Peggy isn't a good person (SHIELD and Hydra as well as her behavior with Steve in CFA) and wouldn't be a good match for Steve. I've loved all the fics for the love b/w Steve/Bucky but the sympathetic writing of Peggy has irked me

Thanks for the ask!

I came into fandom pretty late so I missed a lot of that, but I’m told Peggy has always been pretty popular in the Stucky fandom.

I think her popularity comes from a number of reasons — 1) lack of other female characters at the time, 2) easy to project onto, 3) a reluctance to tackle her negative traits.

At the time when Stucky’s popularity exploded, there weren’t a lot of female characters in the MCU. There were Pepper and Jane, both of whom were passive watchers and “civilian counterparts” to the main character's heroic enterprise. Peggy was a rare Phase 1 love interest that seemed to be present and at least somewhat handy with a gun. People were more forgiving of unfavourable character moments — and just coming from the movies alone, you could bend the narrative to ignore most of those unfavourable moments.

Which leads me to the second point, which I think is the most important one. The vagueness with which Peggy is written makes her an incredibly useful “blank” character to project onto. Firstly, her mannerisms are forceful and assertive, and the superhero genre target audience is one who likes to watch things being resolved by fights. As I said above, at the time there really isn't any other female character (apart from Nat) for the female audience who likes action heroes. Secondly, Peggy and Nat form the madonna-whore dichotomy (especially with Whedon’s characterisation), and a lot of people would prefer to project onto the fandom madonna than the whore. Thirdly, she has very little character traits within the movies apart from “strong-willed” and maybe “ambitious”, which gives a lot of flexibility to how writers can play with her character. Fourth, the fact that her appearances in the movies only ever occur in Steve’s company (except the later cameos) gives a misattribution of narrative proximity, with a lot of fans believing (especially if they haven’t revisited the source in years) that she was a more important narrative force than she actually was. But that same narrative proximity is appealing if you want to project onto a female character who can participate in Steve’s adventures and you don’t like Nat or Sharon or an OC.

And the third point I think is the trickiest part. Does fandom misogyny exist? Of course it does, especially in the MCU. But misogyny is also flung around as an accusation against fans who make genuine critiques of a character or want to write a nuanced female character that acknowledges her negative traits. Someone once dumped a 1500 word rant in my comments because I omitted Peggy from a Stucky meta, so you can imagine how much her rabid fans would arc up if you are actually critical.

Besides, writing a nuanced character takes effort and planning and a lot of hard work. I know for myself unless I plan to tackle Peggy as a fully-fledged character, I'd either omit her from the story or give her a very minor role that is not overtly critical, because it's just not worth the effort of the argument in the notes.

#anti peggy carter #asks

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aspecpplarebeautiful · 25 days

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Hello! If you don't mind, this is half a vent and half an ask both to you and to your followers who have had some experience?

I feel like I want certain aspects of a romantic relationship, the idea of having someone "special" is very appealing. Especially since I find myself falling in the trap of romance tropes, and I really do feel that I want to find that one person who I'd feel safe being physically close with, and not just because I turn my brain off to suffer through it but to actually enjoy it.

I know that I'm rather attracted to men, in theory at least, but whenever there's even remotely a thought in my brain that a polite conversation may turn into something more I get nervous, kinda in a bad way. I feel like I want to put a barrier in and I'm afraid they'll be reading into my behaviour too much. It makes me feel as if I like to play pretend in my head but I'm too much of a coward when real life gets involved.

I've been identifying as ace for years now, and I just turned 24. No experience in the dating department, I've been slowly making my way to accepting being at least arospec as well, possibly just aro, but for some reason it's been so much harder for me. Asexuality just clicked. This I think I may be fighting because the idea of a relationship seems too nice to give up and I've already had a bad experience with an extremely undernegotiated QPR (ended quickly but left a bitter taste nevertheless).

I just wish I could not think about it? But I also feel like the societal expectations of romantic attraction are much more pressing than sexual one. I don't want to lead anyone on, and I don't want to feel this little bit of dread whenever I have a conversation with a guy who I know doesn't have a girlfriend. That's another sign of being aro, right? Being able to be comfortable only when the possibility of the other party wanting you romantically is non-existent.

Sorry for this being so long. Thank you for listening, either way.

Romance definitely has a hard to explain quality to it, and I think that can make it questioning if you're aro especially tricky. It is possible that anxiety you're feeling when a situation could turn romantic is a form of repulsion. It's not uncommon for romance repulsion to feel more like anxiety or nervousness, and for people feel like wanting to go and hide. Alloromantic people can be nervous too sometimes, but it usually comes with a feeling of anticipation and still being drawn to the other person. Or they will usually have either trouble with anxiety in other areas, or issues with romance (romance related trauma for example). Sometimes it can be tricky to know exactly what it is, but if the stuff below doesn't sound like you at all, than repulsion is a likely explanation.

The other thing I would point is that fully alloromantic people often have people in real life they are experience a romantic pull towards, who they really want to be in a romantic relationship with. And if you're not experiencing that, that could also be a strong sign of being aromantic.

Being aromantic, and even romance repulsed, if you are, does not mean you can't have a very important person in your life. I know you mentioned a QPR that didn't go well, and it's up to you if that's something you ever want to try again, but even if you don't. remember that deep bonds can come in all forms of relationships. All types of relationships, including friendships, familial relationships, etc. have the potential to be very special of very deep if you end up connecting to someone in the right way. So whatever path you choose to take, don't feel like this isn't possible.

I'll throw this out followers too if anyone wants to share their own thoughts or advice.

All the best, Anon! Good luck!

#vent post

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magadauthan · 1 month

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Ep 16: Fifth Moon

Trying to keep up. Maybe I can keep the @trigun98watchparty to one day behind? Yeah, right. Fifth Moon ends the first arc of the story and next we transition to the not-fully-fleshed-out TriMax portion.

"The greater the tragedy, the greater the emotional effect." You're not wrong, Legato.

--Midvalley has sax appeal lolz

--Meryl's so sad, look at her. She misses him terrible. Milly's worried too, but she's just as worried about Meryl as she is about Vash.

--"Oops, did I say that out loud? No, I don't have a thing for him at all, ah ha ha ha ha"

--Oh Meryl, honey, please be careful.

--The non sequitur with the weird little messenger... can someone please explain it to me? Is there a cultural reference here that a Western audience wouldn't get? Or is this some odd interpretation of the Garden of Gethsemane for Vash?

--WW can't stay away.

--yes, it's bowdlerization... but seriously, how can you get a major city evacuated in like one day? Anyone who's lived through a natural disaster knows how that goes.

--EG Mine anticipates the pandemic! Plus, only Legato gets to be a drama queen.

--Nice lampshading of samurai tropes against spaghetti westerns.

--Rai-Dei brings a sword to a gunfight. Indiana Jones knows how to handle this situation.

--Meryl has crossed the line from worried sick into worried stupid, and Milly knows it. Someone is going to have to be the adult in the room, and it won't be Meryl.

--Western audiences wouldn't pick up on Meryl's shift in pronouns (neither would I except for that excellent discussion) but she's crying out like a child to go to Vash. She's wailing in despair, fighting her best friend because she is desperate to help the man she loves, and Milly has to pick her up and drag her away. Milly knows how to be a good big sister.

--Twisted Christian Science is a good name for a band.

--Vash nukes another city, and presumably all the Plants in it, so what the hell, Knives

--WW doesn't seem terribly sorry to be offing Rai-Dei, especially since he's become more fond of Vash than he'd let on. "this annoying guy, and he beat up on Vash, fuck him"

--Oh, Meryl. Meryl. Trying to hide the tears under bravado, only to be told that she's to stop looking for Vash immediately and she has no further excuse to try in the future. The only reason she has to follow him now is that she loves him - which I'm not sure she's admitted to herself at this point - and it would cost her everything.

--The saddest part of the ep is that the individual people Vash has helped, or whose lives have been touched by his actions, now have to ask themselves which Vash is the real one. Were the kind things he did for them just a ploy? Were they tricked? Is he evil, is he the devil, is he wicked, is he inhuman? (yes on that last one... sort of. depends what you mean by "human.") It may be only Meryl who continues to believe in him wholly at that point. (Even Milly is angry, because Meryl is crying over him, and Meryl doesn't cry.)

Fade to black.

#trigun #trigun 98 #trigun 98 watch party #vash the stampede #meryl stryfe #milly thompson #Day 16 #Fifth Moon

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sylenth-l · 5 months

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for Cayde/Andal and Osiris/Felwinter, who do you think fell first and who fell harder?

Oh! Let me think...

For candal - I'm not sure, it was probably quite mutual process, but I'd say Cayde solely because he seems like the type to get enamored rather easily, especially with someone as likeable and attractive as Andal + Andal himself can actually think one step forward and was worried about how this possible relationship will affect their pack. Especially if it didn't work out for some reason and they'd have to break up. But when it comes to actually doing something, I guess this is fully on Andal, because he is the only one in this duo who is capable of making decisions and facing consequences asjdhfkjsh

But yeah, I can totally see that for Cayde the thought of having to confess to Andal and getting rejected was so horrendous it outweighed all possible pros of him saying yes. In general however, I think in their case both ways are possible and it mostly depends on the circumstances, since their feelings and ways of showing it progressed more or less with the same speed and intensity.

For felris - oh, here I think it was definitely Osiris, because he. Has eyes. And pretty vivid imagination adsjkfhslkja But yeah, if we're taking the romantic route here, I guess Osiris' first and pretty fast formed interest in Felwinter was physical, inseparably mixed with scientific curiosity about how his Exo frame is constructed, how it works, what he can and cannot do, etc. Osiris seems like the type who can get turned on easily, but can brush that away just as easily, switching to whatever is the problem/question/challenge/research he's occupied with right now. And Felwinter thought it was just that, not surprising at all with Osiris' desire to learn everything about everything as fast as possible, so he answered his technical questions and didn't think much further into it. But as they grew closer and got to know each other better, this simple crush/fascination also grew into something bigger, that couldn't be swept aside as easily. (But tbh they are still so new for me to think about that way, I'm still figuring out how things could've worked between them)

And for the fell harder part - I think in both cases both parts are equally obsessed (in a good way) with each other or else it's not that appealing to me?

I'm sorry, my answers in stuff like that are usually boring af 😂

#ask #destiny

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starlittheory · 3 months

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Thinking about Hazbin Hotel, specifically Alastor’s verse in Finale

The verse starts with the line “This place reeks of death, there’s a chill in the air, and I barely escaped being killed by a hair” At first I thought that Alastor was talking about the smell of death because he is walking through a battlefield of slaughtered angels, but the denizens of Hell would smell death after every extermination, so it wouldn’t be something new to Alastor. In episode 7 Alastor is shown to hang around Cannibal Town which would constantly smell of death which makes the mention of the smell seem out of place for him. Charlie also comments on the smell of Hell during the song "A Happy Day in Hell" with the line “It’s a realm so appealing it beats anywhere, if you don't mind the smell”. I believe that during “Finale”, Alastor brings up the smell because the hotel now reeks of his death. Alastor sees himself as incredibly powerful and fully thought that he was going to be the one to kill Adam, so his view of himself was severely shaken when he was defeated and almost killed. He is grieving his own death because he has never been so close to it before. It’s hard for him to stand in the wreckage of the hotel because the land is now stained with the memory of him almost dying. Which makes being inside his old radio tower feel cold and off putting.

The next line of the song is “Great Alastor, Altruist, died for his friends. Sorry to disappoint, that is not where this ends” and I have seen a ton of people talking about this line. If you watch Hazbin Hotel with the subtitles on you will notice that this is the only one of Alastor's lyrics to be put in quotations, which means that he is not saying it, he is quoting someone else. To me this line reads as a headline for either a newspaper or a radio broadcast. Alastor is predicting what would have been said if Adam killed him. He is saying that other people in hell would see him as an altruist and would assume that the people in the hotel were his friends since he died “protecting” them. But that's not what actually happened because Alastor is not an Altruist. An altruist is someone who is devoted to the wellbeing of other people, but Alastor was fighting Adam to show off his strength. Alastor is very distraught while he sings about being remembered, he runs his hands through his hair and looks around frantically. He does not want to be remembered as an altruist because that would ruin his image as a powerful overlord. Alastor says that this is not where his story ends because he is going to prove that he is not weak or an altruist. I love Alastor and I believe that deep down he likes being surrounded by the members of the hotel, but he definitely does not consider them to be friends.

He then continues saying “I'm hungry for freedom like never before. The constraints of my deal surely have a backdoor”. Being face to face with double death has made Alastor realize that he needs to speed up the process of finding a loophole. If he can get out of his deal and gain his autonomy and power back then he will be less likely to face double death again. Alastor is a demon known to make deals as is shown in the pilot when Vaggie warns Charlie to never make a deal with him (even though they both end up making a deal). Alastor is most likely at the Hotel to either use Charlie’s power to get out of the deal or to fulfill it. During episode 7’s song “Ready for This” Alastor tells Rosie “She's filled with potential that I could guide”telling me that he is definitely interested in her power. I find it hard to believe Alastor would stick around the hotel for pure “entertainment” purposes after he was defeated by Adam, especially after seeing how upset he was during this song.

Finally, his last lyric is “Once I figure out how to unclip my wings. Guess who will be pulling all the strings”. Clipping the wings of birds is a practice done so that they cannot fly away and leave the owner. Later on, the wings can grow back, but by that time the bird would have learned not to leave. It's a means of keeping the bird trapped and reliant on the owner. He is not saying that he had literal wings, he is using a metaphor to demonstrate his tie to whoever has him on a leash. The second half of the line indicates that Alastor will be more powerful after he gets out of his deal. We do not yet know the details of Alastors deal, but I believe that Alastor will be more powerful because he will get his autonomy back. In the show we see Husk and Angel Dust also on leashes and we know that they have lost a good chunk of their free will. In “Loser, Baby”, Husk sings “I sold my sold to save my power” probably because he was down on his luck and had nothing left to gamble but his soul. So far we have not seen Alastor lose as much of his autonomy as Angel and Husk have, except for the fact that he has been gone for 7 years. I cannot wait to find out who Alastor is chained to and the details of his deal.

#hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #ramblings #alastor #radio demon #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor altruist

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sporesgalaxy · 4 months

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Hey I've seen you got into one piece.

I've also recently gotten into one piece, I find it really cool.

I've seen you also talking about the show both to praise it and in a critical way.

Sorry to ask unprompted and this isn't to spark anything just a genuine question: what do you think about usopp's design?

I love the character but his design has always felt.... Bad and uncomfortable to put it mildly. Mostly the lips.

Am I being stupid? Idk you or maybe some of your followers can answer me/there can be a (civil obviously) discussion.

If you don't respond could you say that you won't be responding to the usopp ask so I know to never ask things like this? If you want. You don't have to do anything

Yeah, the lips on Usopp's design resemble an anti-black caricature. I do hate that.

I can't say I know or understand if the context of drawing lips that way is the same in Japan as it is here in America*. In America, there is a generations-long precedent of stylizing lips that way for antiblack racist caricatures. This put me off of One Piece for many many years.

I started reading just before the live action show dropped. I wanted to know why so many Americans could overlook something as off-putting as the Usopp's caricature-esque lips.

I fully expected a dime-a-dozen case study in audience willingness to dismiss antiblackness when there are enough other appealing aspects to distract from it.

What I learned was this: One Piece is very long. One Piece has made openly anti-racist arguments on more than one occasion, especially in some recent parts of the story**. One Piece has played into racist tropes on more than one occasion, especially earlier in the story.

The philosophy One Piece is built around is that everyone deserves equal human rights and autonomy, and that everyone is capable of helping to make that a reality. That philosophy is fundamentally against antiblack racism. That absolutely does NOT mean that One Piece or Oda are incapable of antiblack racism.

But I think One Piece's philosophy makes it a story worth discussing!!! A story worth reading and thinking about and using to reflect on yourself!!!!

I think that Usopp is irreplaceable as an aspirational figure for people with a desire to make a positive impact on the world who struggle with fear and anxiety, and I'm glad he was written. I still fucking wish they would stop drawing his lips like that though, yeah.

*The more Japanese animation I've watched over time, the more I see nonblack characters with lips stylized that way. That's what makes me question if there's some separate origin to it, maybe not based in bigoted caricature?? But I have no idea.

**Recent parts of One Piece have also started discussing DNA as a source for superpowers. If Oda fucks this up and makes it eugenicist I'm going to kill him. I have hope that it won't happen, because of all of the non-biological family representation in One Piece, but if it does, seriously, I'm gonna flip my shit...

#adddna #1pc #1pc discussion

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artzzyb00-27 · 7 months

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{💜Kimchi Prep & Dish💜}

Korean readers need more representation. That's it. Also, if I ever offend any of you white people. Please, respectfully, get over it. No one has said anything(maybe because I haven't joked about it yet satirically) but I've had experience with people telling me the being racist to white people was a thing. And that they shouldn't be responsible for their ancestors actions. Then later on go to make racist jokes. Not saying I hate white people, I just don't immediately like you guys. The bar is not the hard to overcome anyway. Just don't be a racist biggot and we're good.

In Queens there was a small Korean restaurant with a pretty decent community filled with familiarity. Something that attracted a quartet of mutant turtles who were always longing for new experiences. And places like this were perfect.

The culture was unique, music was widespread, and people were of different variety and presentability. Proven especially with Iseul Ok(pronounced; 'Ock'). One of the daughters helping out at her grandfather's restaurant. The turtle brothers had saved the blind man before from some low lifer's and he repaid with food for life. No complaints were made, anything to stop eating pizza whenever they couldn't get any specific ingredients.

So when they told him about their situation, he told them to come after hours so they could eat in peace behind the building. Which turned to them meeting his youngest grandchild. She was really sweet. Shocked about their appearance at first but then quickly turned when she started cracking jokes with Mikey. So Donnie watched. Observed. Tried to make sense of her. Learn about her.

He gained an interest to learn about the culture of her and her family. Which turned to him asking about Kimchi. Since it had gained a lot of popularity on TikTok, and it reached his 'For You Page'. To say she was ecstatic was an understatement.

"Kimchi's really important to us. It's a national treasure. You know for some people it represents love and future?" She asked rhetorically, which made Donnie tilt his head to the side smiling. Listening to her ramble was something he found appealing. She wasn't ashamed for her culture, which sadly was something that happened to often in cultures who weren't colonizers.

"How come it's popular?"

"Our ancestors wanted to achieve balance between nutritional qualities and health. At first it was pretty bland. Some salted vegetables with Korean Radish. Later on spices were added. There's a lot versions of it now but they each have the same origin. At least 180 varieties."

"Damn! People sure love their food." Donnie mused as Iseul collided her hip with his playfully. After fully making it Iseul turned to Donnie with a weary smile. He smiled back at her nervously.

"Sorry, it's just,... usually for it to get good fermentation it should be stored for at least one or two days. Or sometimes two weeks. You can try it now and bring your brother's back so they can taste the good version."

"Whatever you think is best. I'm only just learning." Smiling, Iseul grabbed a piece that looked more covered in the spices and fed it too the 6'11 turtle. Who leaned to reach her 5'10 stature, which was taller than most women in her community. Older generations barely reaching 5'3.(Y'all are tiny, no offense)

Savoring the flavor, Donnie's eyes lit up at the texture and amount of flavor. He was so happy in fact, that he started churring. Shamelessly might I add. Which made her happy. It showed that he was comfortable around her and didn't try to mask himself to appear more "normal".

"It's delicious, can't wait to try it again in a few weeks." He smiled at Iseul and helped clean up the kitchen after putting the Kimchi away in storage.

"Remember to bring your brothers. I want them to get a good taste of it." Nodding in agreement, he left her apartment and arrived home around 2:30 am.

--------------------------------

A few weeks later the brothers were headed to Iseul's apartment to try out the infamous food Donatello had been hyping up. Smirking in amusement Raph nudged his older brother who returned the emotion and turned to his nerdy brother.

"Question. How long have you been waiting for this?"

"Not long, like two weeks. Only because it makes the flavor set in more." Nodding at the explanation Leo glanced at his other two brothers and looked back to Donnie.

"And you're sure it isn't because we haven't been able to see her that you're so excited?" Rolling his eyes, Donnie turned away from his leader.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." A small laugh came from Mikey as he walked up to his brother in purple coloration.

"Bro, if we were messing with you, you could tell. Be honest now,.." A pause fell over the turtles waiting for the youngest one to finish his sentence, "Have y'all kissed yet? Ow-!"

Getting hit by a pebble to the noggin wasn't fun. Especially when it was thrown slightly faster than usual by the most yolked out of the ninja quartet. Glaring at his little brother, Raph turned to his twin brother.

"Ignore him, let's just go. But D, seriously. Just ask Ise out man. Her family already knows about you. Not much stopping you," Donnie went to open his mouth to retort but was shut down by Raph. "Cept for losing the friend-ship, and yadda yadda."

"We'll make give Donnie advice later. We gotta hurry before Iseul starts spamming our phones." Leo told the others before running off with the three in tow.

Arriving at the apartment, Iseul opened the window for them to come in and made sure no one was watching. Setting their weapons down somewhere safe the brothers went to relax on the couch and started the Nintendo to play Mario Party. All of them except for Donnie and Iseul who was getting the giant container of Kimchi out.

"Feast your eyes, Dontron." She said while lightly pushing it towards the turtle. The food was bubbling and making noises. Eagerly Donnie grabbed a piece of cabbage ate it. Eyes lighting up in enthusiasm. Turning his head to the tall girl next to him.(Who was still small compared to Paul Bunyan over here.)

"It's even better than before! You have to let me take some for Splinter. Guys get in here!" With a few seconds the turtles and Iseul were snacking on the Kimchi while also enjoying video games and at some point a movie. After some talking the brothers got ready to leave. All but one.

"You guys get going. I'll catch up." He said handing Leo the bag containing a portion of Kimchi for their master. Agreeing, the three turtles left through the window and headed up to the roof. Iseul looked at Donnie confused. That is till he pulled her into a hug, which she reciprocated, and began talking.

"This is really hard to say and get off my chest. I know we're best friends and we don't keep secrets from each other and you've said before that you can tell me anything,.." Taking a pause after putting the girl down and looking at the ground to avoid eye contact he barely lifted them to see her face. She caught on to what he was saying. "But that's also why I'm not as nervous to tell you this because I know that you're not someone to shut out others who are emotional or don't think before acting. Something I admire about you the most."

At that point Iseul got on her tip toes and kissed him on his cheek. Standing there in shock and lifting a hand to touch the area she kissed. Hearing a click they both turned to the window and saw Mikey laughing and running back onto the roof. Groaning Donnie looked back to Iseul and smiled.

"Let's make this official tomorrow. My grandpa is making a giant buffet for the community and he wants all of you to come. Could also give them a chance to meet Splinter." Nodding, Donnie leaned down slightly and kissed her forehead and ran out the window.

Jumping up to the roof ignoring his shit-head brothers staring him down after smiling at the pictures the youngest turtle took.

#bay tmnt #bayverse tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles 2014 #teenage mutant ninja turtles 2016 #tmnt #bayverse tmnt fanfic #tmnt 2016 #bayverse turtles #tmnt 2014 #bayverse donnie #bayverse donnie x oc #tmnt oc #oc #korean oc #korean readers please critique if needed #tmnt oots #tmnt out of the shadows

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robinwithay · 5 months

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I'm mean this very /gen, but I've seen a lot of posts recently talking about how fans need to think more about Aziraphale and not baby Crowley and based on these posts fans seem heavily skewed towards Crowley but... I'm hardly in this Fandom, I pop in from time to time to see art and fic and meta for like a week or two, go away for a bit, and then come back and check in again, and generally what I've seen more than anything, is posts about Aziraphale and his trauma and why he's suffering the most and Crowley should have Done Better and Aziraphale Defense no matter what, any aziraphale critique seen as hate...

So I'm not sure where this disconnect is happening. We're apparently seeing completely opposite sides of the Fandom, but it seems like the overwhelming majority. So I see posts that are like, okay let's focus more on Aziraphale, and I'm like, that's literally all I'm seeing......this isn't meant to start something, bc I honestly am curious how this is happening and how everyone is either miscommunicating or idk something

hi anon! first of all, sorry it took me so long to get to this ask - it's partly because i really don't know the answer. i've spoken to others about this phenomenon of everyone seeming to only see the opposite of whatever "side" they've personally chosen, and it does seem to happen a lot. i have a theory it's partially confirmation bias - as in people ignore what they see that agrees with what they already think, and only focus on/remember what doesn't because they want to believe there is opposition to their opinion - partially temporal (maybe especially temporal for you, if you only dip in and out!) - as in more people have come around to seeing Aziraphale's side of things the more time has passed after the initial pain of s2 making a lot of people side more with Crowley - and partially that there is a real divide.

personally, i think that choosing "sides" between two characters who love each other is...silly. i think both of them were wrong and right in different ways, they both hurt each other, and they both have some development they need to do to forgive and earn each other's forgiveness.

however, i do think there was a huge initial wave of hatred thrown at Aziraphale that some folks are still very much riding. since season 1, i think Crowley has always been the fandom favourite, and i say that in full appreciation of the fact that in terms of fandom, the GO fandom is a rare one where the disparity between fandom favourites is much smaller than in most. plenty of people love Aziraphale, but he doesn't tend to get the same treatment as Crowley. and it's understandable - Crowley is a sad wet cat of a demon, and people love an underdog, an antihero. i think a lot of folks really relate to Crowley in his bitterness, his depression, his resent. he's been treated badly, rejected, tossed aside, and persists regardless, and - unfortunately - a lot of people know how that feels. it helps that Crowley is very easy to read (despite his best efforts), especially to the audience. his motivations are clear and relatable.

Aziraphale, on the other hand, is...kinda more complicated. he's generally operating on so many layers of deceit and denial that i don't know if he himself fully understands how he truly feels half the time - he's not honest about his emotions to the audience or himself. that doesn't make for an accessible, relatable character for most people, but for those with whom it resonates, it really resonates.

let me be clear: Crowley is not a bad character for being easier to read. Aziraphale is not a bad character for being harder to read. they're just different and appeal to different people.

#good omens #ask

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kusokurae01 · 1 month

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*Cracks knuckles* Did you really think I wouldn't RETURN THE FAVOR- now, what's YOUR favorite Jekyll and Hyde adaptation(Or adaptations)?

Hello, first off thank you so much for this ask! <3 I don't get them everyday, so I'm very happy with how much this blog is growing, little by little.

My top three is quite controversial, but I'd say that my favorite adaptation so far has to be the broadway musical, from which my own adaptation (Apotheosis) takes inspiration; what people don't understand is that an adaptation isn't made to be 1:1 with the original product, especially when the original quite literally doesn't have anything to tell story-wise and is overall a mediocre story with an interesting concept. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy the Novella, but I take it for what it is instead of pretending that my interpretation is 100% correct and canon and treating the book as if it were a masterpiece of classic literature, when it isn't— sure, it's a small, enjoyable story which can be interpreted however you want and that's also what makes it appealing to most people— the uncertainity of everything, the fact that we don't know who the reliable narrator is, it's VERY interesting, but it isn't the writing that makes the story, to me. So you see, my disdain for novella fans not only comes from the fact that they're gatekeeping assholes, but also that they insist that their interpretation is the only correct one, when the novella was written PRECISELY to don't have a correct interpretation, at least IMO.

Funniest thing is that they expect Hyde to be a bachelor of morality somehow and not do anything problematic besides murder, because we are so desenitized to violence that apparently now it's something inherently normal (or rather just fandom puritan bullshit), as if this wasn't the literal Victorian Era and the author wasn't a rampaging racist (which is normal for again, the period we find ourselves in. But they are willing to shit on people who attempt to be historically accurate, but when you mention that the dead man they have a parasocial relationship with was racist, and that the original book description of Hyde was IIRC, xenophobic too, they suddenly pull one hundred excuses up from their asses, but only because it's convenient to THEM in that moment).

These people know who I am referring to considering that they "called me out" on their shitty discord server over the 9/11 J&H joke in my description, pfp which was just Christine with a sapphic flag which also makes me presume these people are inherently mysoginistic, and the fact I ship musical Jekyde, sorry for being based I guess. I 100% expect them to see this, and if they do, I have one simple request— get your shit together, you aren't some literary critic, you are like seventeen and a "wrong headcanon" is enough to ruin your day, if not week, fully.

TL;DR Musical takes the first spot, the novella is good albeit mediocre and overrated and its fans are insufferable.

Now, what makes me like the musical if the recorded play wasn't anything special and Hasselhoff's acting atrocious?

The musical was the second adaptation I've watched of J&H, so it's only fair that I am very attached to it, but still recognize its inherent flaws— I don't think however, the musical should be judged because of a bad recording adaptation alone considering the many interpretations we got from other actors (Rob Evans, Robert Cuccioli...) and the simple choreography itself, especially when it was first performed in 1995; all the ideas behind it which in the end didn't make it in the play, are somewhat still there, like Simon Stride basically replacing Lanyon and being an enemy to Jekyll, someone double-faced just like the rest of the governors.

For those who don't know, Stride was supposed to be a main antagonistic figure in the musical, he was the owner of Red Rats and of other several brothels in Kentish Town as stated by Hyde in The Wedding Reception, also described as a green-eyed monster in The Ballad of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, the one who performed Good and Evil originally, supposedly when he was collecting money from prostitutes. Since The Spider basically took his role, we also know that Stride is inherently a domestic abuser considering that he hits Lucy on several occasions, other than being Jekyll's contestant for Lisa/Emma as shown in Lisa Carew which literally completely destroys the perception that Lisa completely depends on Jekyll when that's not inherently true. She's underdeveloped yes, but her character is interesting nevertheless, the musical is called JEKYLL AND HYDE, it's normal that it focuses on telling Jekyll's story, because a musical can't be ten hours long. His motivations are inherently unknown, but I suspect that he simply is jealous of Jekyll and overall wanted, like Hyde stated in The Wedding Reception, to put Lisa/Emma in one of his brothels, and he was angry that Jekyll spared her that fate, seemingly.

See? Everything, even if it didn't made it in the final product, it blends in with the background story of the musical's society perfectly, making the world feel alive rather than static like it did in the Novella.

Lisa/Emma is a woman who clearly wants independence, which was something definitely big for the period, considering that the ideal of victorian woman from the conservative classes was that of a frail and submissive lady (which I think it's also seen in the fact that their ideal make up made them look almost as if they were ill due to how pale they were) and the first feminist movements literally simply asked to be beaten up by their husbands less. This is seen in Letting Go and Lisa Carew. She doesn't depend on Jekyll and is stated by her nevertheless, she chose to marry him because she genuinely liked him, and never doubts him even when the big reveal happens. Underdeveloped =/= Bad character.

Lucy, on the other side of the spectrum, is a prostitute, which was the lowest and most hated class you could possibly be a part of. Other than this she's a domestic abuse victim, and the only person who ever considered defending her and showed her kindness, instead of objectifying her even when she was giving him sexual hints, was Jekyll. It's only normal she'd latch onto him; she clearly wants to live a different life and keeps hoping that things will get better for her, because everyone has their day (The Girls of The Night), even when her own best friend (Nellie) discourages her, she keeps hoping. She feels genuinely lost, (Nobody Knows Who I Am) in which it is left implied that she doesn't have anything if not her identity as a prostitute, and that not even her friends (possibly, one of her lines was referred to Nellie) know who she truly is; once, perhaps there were possibilities for her, but that faded because for a prostitute in the victorian era, there's genuinely no hope or respect. Bring on the Men also makes us understand that she's been a prostitute for a very long time now, so who other than she knows this? But yet she keeps hoping, and eventually her prayers get answered. She turns to Jekyll when Hyde first physically harmed her and, she seems very resigned about what has happened to her while Jekyll is horrified, and her emotions led her to kiss him perhaps as a sign of gratitude, and Jekyll didn't refuse, and if I recall correctly that's when Lucy sings Someone Like You and then later on, In His Eyes with Lisa/Emma. If anything, Jekyll is the villain here because he blatantly gave Lucy false hopes, because his actions as Hyde clearly make us perceive that he was only ever kind of her because of lustful reasons, at least IMO. Her world doesn't revolve around Jekyll, we barely see her in the musical quite frankly, and considering what I'm saying and her little screentime, perhaps Lucy is the MOST developed character of the musical. She's tragic— her death truly shows that there wasn't hope for minorities in that society.

Most criticism I saw about the musical is mainly from people who heard things novella fans themselves told which are inherently inaccurate, or from people who perhaps during the songs in let me repeat, A MUSICAL, didn't pay attention.

now, the second spot is taken by Hyde & Seek, I don't have much to say about it because I mainly saw snippets from it but, the motivations are pretty much the same as the musical, the worldbuilding is really good, the characters are funny and memorable, and the art direction is just chefs kiss.

Novella is third.

#.txt #jekyll and hyde #jekyll and hyde weekly

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beevean · 7 months

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I never understood why people praise Satam as the end-all be-all of Sonic media and gush about how dark it is. First off, the games (especially Sonic CD) handled the "Robotnik takes over and turns world into polluted hellhole with his machines" concept much better. Second it wasn't even all that dark. The games had darker moments like having an unarmed terminally ill child get gunned down like a damn dog on-screen, baby Chao being stomped to death and having Sonic's friends experience a "I have no mouth and I must scream" sensation of floating in a black limbo without a body, after being turned into fully conscious immobile statues. The robians were just mindless zombies. They got it easy.

Even Satams Robotnik was pretty lackluster. All he did was sit on his rotund rear end at hq and bark orders like a Screaming Dumbass. He even begged for his worthless life before a Canon foreigner villain . He literally kissed the ground while beggingm

Also he was a freaking dumbass for not using the robians as meat shields against sonic or using them as attack dogs since the freedom fighters wouldn't want to harm a former mobian that could very well be a loved one.

Also Satam Sonic was weak AF! Satam tails was weaker than a kitten!

Sorry, no point in coming to me to complain about SatAM because I never watched a single episode of it lmao.

To be fair, all the dark stuff you mentioned came after SatAM, and to this day Shadow's backstory and Gerald's diary are considered the darkest point of the games. (no such respect for my girl Tikal or the Time Eater's effects, sadly :( ). I can see how, superficially, people back then would be appealed by SatAM's grimdark nature contrasted with how bright the Classic games were. It's true however that CD was much more creative in its depiction of a world conquered by Eggman: we actually see how much he damaged the zones, from turning the lake in Palmtree Panic into a grey sludge, to mining down all the crystals in Quartz Quadrant, to defacing ancient ruins in Tidal Tempest. It's not just an endless sea of super scary buildings: the zones are corrupted, ruined, and it's all your fault for not stopping it. And, of course, the Good Futures show technology aiding nature instead, making Sonic CD possibly the earliest example of Solar Punk <3

I also personally really love Scrap Brain Act 1's aesthetic. Sonic 1 has a nature-urban progression, so you go from unspoiled Green Hill, to ruins overcome by nature (Marble Zone and Labyrinth), to a city with greenery (Spring Yard), to a city without any greenery but still pretty to look at (Star Light)... to an utter industral monstrosity, the ground completely made of metal and a sky turned orange from the sheer amount of pollution being emitted.

I also find brilliance in how Act 3 is a palette swap of Labyrinth Zone! Eggman has built his base over ancient ruins! He's dumping pollution in the water!

And a personal appreciated detail of mine is how the "good" ending of Sonic 1 8-bit is the power of the Chaos Emeralds cleansing the smoke surrounding South Island. Even in that little game, they made sure to include how much of an ecoterrorist Eggman is <3

Yeah sorry, I have nothing to say about SatAM. Maybe (maybe) one day I'll try to watch some episodes, but I'm not interested. I prefer to talk about the games :>

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic cd #sonic 1

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nhasablogg · 6 months

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Hi, sorry this is not a tickle related question and please feel absolutely free not to answer since it’s a bit personal.

How did you realise that you were asexual?

I’m struggling with my identity and sometimes I think I am since I don’t really feel comfortable with, yk, *doing it* with other people, but I still feel sexual drive sometimes, so I was wondering how do you experience your asexuality.

Ad I said feel absolutely free not to answer and I apologise if you have already talked about this

Sending love 💕

Hi! For me it was always really apparent that I don't have the same type of attraction toward others like the people around me seem to do, especially when we were in our teens and everyone started dating/sleeping around/getting into relationships. I put myself in very uncomfortable situations I didn't want to be in because I felt it was expected of me. I of course can find people visually appealing, but it's very very rare that I feel any type of like... pull toward others? Like I've had crushes (like 15 years ago lmao), but it's never in the sense that "I want this person to kiss me" etc. Honestly as I got older and realized I'm also queer in other ways I wondered if that would explain it, but I still don't really feel what I think others feel toward any gender. Sometimes I wonder if I'm also aro, but I want love too much to fully decide that right now. I've never BEEN in love, but I think the bad situations I ended up in in my teens have made me very wary of romanting (and sexual) attention and I've only recently started trying to date at 28.

This part is TMI and talks about masturbation, minors and people who don't want to know too much about me turn away

But that isn't to say I don't get, you know, horny and whatnot. I will protect my, uh, toys with my life lmaaoooo but I very very VERY rarely fantasize that it's someone else I'm being intimate with. In fact, thinking about it too much makes me VERY uncomfortable. I'm letting go of some old fears though now that I'm older and much more secure in my boundaries and feelings, but the fact that I've been terrified of dating up until now because of the whole societal expectations around sex says a lot to me. Even though people can be scared of sex and not be asexual, I can just feel it because it's not an important part of my life or anything I crave and has instead played a big part in my life as something that's making it quite difficult instead of being something fun and pleasurable. I can 100% understand why people like it, but it's just not important to ME even though I obviously enjoy masturbation.

Tldr I just always knew this about me even though I couldn't put it into words until about 10 years ago. I think many people are picky about their sexual partners too and need to have a connection in order to sleep with others and that they're confusing that experience with mine when I try to tell them, but my end goal is never to sleep with anyone, while for them that is their end goal and a part of their relationships, from what I've understood. But tbh just like my gender it's hard for me to put it in words and as long as I understand what's going on I'm fine with it

#ask #asexuality #tmi #hope this made any sense idk

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idololivine · 7 months

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this event (and his latest ssr rooms) really establishes olivine’s route to self-acceptance and the importance of having someone who will be there to also accept him. thankfully, it’s not the edgelord corruption arc that some people are pushing. this one just resonates with me more 😭

the thing is, some people are trying hard to be good but will sometimes fall short because of reasons. when people are expecting you to always be good, you will sometimes feel the desire to break out of those expectations because you just want to exist as you are—, flaws and all. but that doesn’t mean that you stopped “being good” per se. it’s just that you want to stop catering to their perceived notions of you that you feel like you have to fulfill.

i’m sorry, i am rambling but this event hits too close to home 😭 kinda cringe but i really am an olivine kinnie. his character just validates my faith and my desires and everything i’ve been through so far in life (minus becoming a priest lol)

Yeah!! I mean, I get that a corruption arc would appeal to some people, but I also suspect that it would be appealing in the kink way. Not that I'm kinkshaming, but honestly, it's borderline insulting to me when people criticize his writing when what they really mean is that it doesn't appeal to their corruption kink. Sometimes, Actually Compelling Character Writing is more important than kink. But I digress.

I get that a lot of people like cruel and fucked up characters; there's a comfort to knowing that you can be really fucked up and still deserve kindness, and also there's a persistent fantasy among certain demographics of being able to fix your asshole boyfriend (or not having to fix your asshole boyfriend because he's inhuman.) But that just isn't me. I like it when traumatized characters choose kindness; I like the reassurance that just because I had a cruel upbringing it does not mean I have no choice but to be cruel myself. I love Olivine because at every opportunity, he chooses kindness, and I love that this event is digging into the times where he feels like he no longer has that choice. Even a worm will turn; what happens when you push a fundamentally kind person past their breaking point?

It's a character arc I personally find compelling, especially because the answer in the end isn't "he was actually evil all along" but rather "anyone would go nuts under that kind of pressure" and also "when everyone expects you to be perfect, even the slightest misstep will feel catastrophic - so why not go all the way and destroy everything?" He's not a bad person, just someone who was in a bad situation. So was I. So are many of us. Our worst days do not define us.

The sex isn't the only part of Olivine's struggles, but it is a major part. We see him go from sexually submissive in his first scenes (where he isn't fully responsible for wanting sex, because Eiden's ultimately the one in control) to sexually dominant in his most recent rooms (where he's finally allowing himself to embrace his hunger and take what he wants). It's such a distinctive angle on an arc about self-acceptance, and it's one that couldn't have been told in a fully SFW story. It's erotica as character exploration. I suspect in the future he'll maintain a good push-pull with Eiden where they can trade off who's dominant and who's submissive in scenes, where he's finally shaken off all his shackles and it's all about what feels good in the moment.

#asks #Anonymous #nu carnival #nu carnival olivine

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hollowingearth · 2 months

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Hi I'm responding to your post about being confused at the hopeful lyrics of NPtK! Here are my thoughts:

Firstly, I'm not sure if I agree on heroes and promises being a bad thing in the world of ff7. From my perspective, they've never really been a bad thing, especially since the narrarive allows Cloud gets to become a hero and keep his promise to Tifa. Cloud carries her to a safe place during the Nibelheim incident and then stops Sephiroth. Not to mention he later helps Tifa out with Avalanche and defeats Sephiroth at the end of the game. Perhaps you have a different perspective but I always thought the game has been pretty receptive to the idea of heroes and promises, just that Cloud was kind of a false hero for a lot of the game. (In contrast, the true version of Cloud is a true hero.)

In addition, there was a tweet on Nojima's twitter recently stating that he imagined Aerith wrote the lyrics to appeal to a crowd and that she rewrote the lyrics a few times. Ergo, they are not her purest feelings put to paper. Now, this tidbit doesn't necessarily help this discussion much, but I do think it's worth considering that some of the lyrics could be prophetic in a way Aerith didn't intend. Perhaps she wrote some of them more innocently, unaware of the irony that's to come... (food for thought.)

Anyway I personally think Aerith has resigned herself to fate in the song but that she still can't help longing for something better. She sings: "if only id never known, all the burdens i was born to bear, lived a life without a care in the world save for you, but that won't do." I think this line is exactly what shows the inside of her tumultuous heart! Yes, she's resigned herself to her fate, but even when she's trying to share one last date with Cloud and pretend everything's fine she can't hide the sorrow on her face from the photographer. She longs for fate to change, she just knows it can't, or at least not as much as she'd like. I personally don't think these are really contradictory...? I can see how you might, though.

Err sorry if I missed the point of your post but I'll just send this anyway! I do think you've opened up an interesting discussion though. :)

Ok, first, it's genuinely such a nice thing of you to take time to write this, it made me so so happy. After I saw that NJM's tweet I think I started to understand it much more. You see, my initial interpretation of the lyrics were that Aerith is singing to Cloud to reassure him to not fret as they are sure to meet again, and that meeting would be in the lifestream, as all life is reunited upon death into one single thing. So there were no promises to keep because it was a given that they would meet as everyone dies eventually.

Now that NJM said he sort of imagined it as Aerith writing the song again and again. Honestly, I agree completely with your interpretation. I mean, isn't her song kind of like a prayer, in a way? For a better future to herself? Aerith in the OG is unaware of what is going to happen to her, she's fulfilling her duty, but Aerith in the R-Trilogy knows. She doesn't know her future but we see that she feels the danger that she's in, Nanaki warns Cloud about it and his connection to the lifestream is much weaker than hers (and I don't think she would fully divulge it to him either because Aerith is a bit of a secretive character). I believe she's aware of what's going to happen (even if she doesn't know when) and she chooses it, it's the ultimate sacrifice. I wonder just how scared she was to take every step foward with the increasing uneasiness of her upcoming doom.

It's just very heartbreaking. Specially so if the running time loop theory I've seen floating around is true, actually.

Oh, also, about the hero thing. I still maintain my opinion, actually, though I think I'd like to explain myself better a little bit haha. So, from my point of view, FF7 subverts the idea of a hero or the notion of the becoming of a hero, at least, and I don't think it paints it in a good light. I question the notion that Cloud becomes a hero by saving Tifa because he puts her on a safe spot and then, because of his rage, instead of running away with her (and actually making sure she was truly safe, Zangan is the one who does that) he goes back and kills Sephiroth. That action only makes Sephiroth stronger and allows Cloud (and Zack) to be captured and messed with. He effectively made things worse there. If only Zack was captured and he didn't have to care for Cloud maybe he would have survived. And then, again, when Zack saves Cloud he is uncerimoniously killed by Shinra - the very thing that allowed Zack to funnel his heroism into. And also, yes, the party defeats Sephiroth in the end but Holy is what stops the Meteor and even then, humanity still perishes in the future. People are saved due to the mercy of the lifestream, the recognition of the value of life.

I guess this sounds like what I'm saying is "don't have empathy/help others" haha but it's not it, I guess I just think the game is interested on questioning the reason for their actions and showing how much of it doesn't stem only from empathy but truly from selfishness and the want for recognition. That's what I think for now, at least.

#ff7 rebirth spoilers #final fantasy vii #no promises to keep

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queerprayers · 1 year

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i wish i could be like you. i wish he could love me as he loves you. but im so far away. i ran away from him as fast as i could as a terrified and angry child but little did i know i didnt move an inch: hed never let me. for it i hate him, the feeling is mutual and my existance is concrete proof. is the transition from burning metaphorically to literally so jarring as it's said to be? i'll find out. he'll whisper the answer in my ear for the first and last time.

but im so very glad you found peace and love in him and im so happy the feeling is mutual. im not good with tone but like im being honest. i wish you the best in all you do.

Hello, beloved. This is so honest and vulnerable and I have so much love for you. I know it's been a long time, but I hear you. I don't know if anything I can say can get across to you how much you matter, how much I'm glad for your existence. But I'll always try. And I know all of this is easier said than lived out, but we have to say it first.

You're not like me, and you don't have my experiences and emotions, because you're not me. I don't know you, but I know we didn't grow up the same way, we weren't taught the same things, we don't have the same life. However appealing others' lives may seem, we can't have them. We only have what we've been given, however hard and alone it is. I'm sorry, but I'm mostly grateful that you can bring your unique experience to the world. Diversity of life benefits us all.

I don't know if you'll believe me, but I do know that I am not more loved than you. God's love is outside of our comprehension, and because it is infinite and more-than-human, we are held equally and fully in the universe's love. There is not more or less of it, it just is.

You're right, it doesn't matter how much you run--God is there. There is no place without Them. This is scary sometimes, and you can hate it, but I hope there are moments where this is comforting to you. Every moment of your life and experience is within God. Sometimes we need to run, transform our lives, exist completely differently. And you'll find God is there, too. And does it suck, to be fully known? Yeah, sometimes.

You're allowed to hate God. It's not a space I would recommend staying in, if only for your peace of mind, but it's allowed. It's a real experience. If that's where you are right now, that's where you are. Bring it to Them! There is no world in which God hates you back, but sometimes we can't believe that yet. For now, maybe, you bring your fear and anger and loneliness to God, and see what it can transform into.

Trying to comprehend God does burn, I know that all too well. But we cannot let that burning be mistaken for hate. Hate has touched me many times, especially as a queer person, and it's cold and unfeeling. But that burning? Learning to let God love us hurts. It's too much to bear, sometimes. Sometimes I think it'd be easier to live in an indifferent universe. Then I wouldn't feel like I owe anyone anything. But we don't, we live in a fully aware, breathing universe, that wants us to know Love. We can be angry at it, and then we can let it lead us to full life. You've opened up so much to me. Keep opening yourself up to people, to experience, and to God.

I can't tell you with any certainty what awaits you, especially after death. There's so much trust that goes into not being afraid of death, trust that you might not be able to process right now. Live, for now. Life is the most jarring thing you have to process/experience right now. Don't let thoughts of death take up your precious life.

I promise I don't have anything special. (Well, I do, with God's help, but no more than we all do.) At some point, I've thought almost everything you've written about myself and my own life. I've found peace and love with God, but I've also found anger and loneliness and doubt. I'm in a better space right now, and this blog reflects that, but I've fought to get here, tooth and nail. There is no peace without growth. There is no love without a fight.

Thank you for your kindness toward me, even as you struggle. It would be so easy for you to be angry with me. Happiness for the people we're jealous of is a skill I haven't fully learned yet. That right there, that compassion, tells me that you have so much love within you. Perhaps someday you can extend that love to yourself (who God made), and to the world (who is God). You're in my prayers. I'm proud of you.

<3 Johanna

#asks #y'all send me poetry and sometimes i don't know how to tell you that.

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