𝐋𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐲
?? x Fem!Reader Drabble
Tw: Implied violence, angst, hospital themes
[“His chapped lips part, but he remains speechless. The fires that once lit his eyes had been extinguished, left glossy and damp. He looks so overwhelmed. So lost. ”]
The corridor smells sterile, fluorescent lights line the chalk colored ceiling, and white tiles run down the stretch of the hallway; you feel yourself suffocating with anxiety in this setting. It’s like you’re sleepwalking, merely hallucinating that you’d been called to the ER at 5 AM on account that you were the only listed number on his entree form. Nothing can ever change the fact that you despise medical settings. You feel awkward, hovering in toe with the nurse as she gently guides you to the waiting room, leaving you to fill out paperwork.
You aren’t even an adult, and you’re being forced to fill out paperwork?
“When did my penmanship get so sloppy?” you wonder, scribbling down your name with a shaky hand.
You can hardly focus. It feels like all your thoughts are being snubbed out by that signature hospital scent.
The paperwork is collected; you hold your jacket awkwardly in your arms. It’s a waiting game… until the doctor approaches you.
“Miss (L/N)?”
You rise from your seat, nodding at the man. He looks over his clipboard, eventually folding the file behind his back and giving you his full attention.
“You’re here for…?” You nod in confirmation, again, feeling unable to utter a word.
Your voice, when you finally rasp out a few words, sounds hoarse and unfamiliar, “Where is he?”
In a matter of minutes, you find yourself closing the curtain into the dark corner of the hospital. The room is blue-washed and dim; the only light sources come from the beeping machines and warmly lit bed light. You catch a glimpse of the pulse oximeter on his finger, the tell-tale red glow hiding beneath a fold in the covers.
You hover awkwardly by the doorway, admiring his side profile in silence. His broad chest rises and falls, each breath accompanied by the heart monitor’s beeping. You’ve never seen him looking so vulnerable and bloody.
You approach the bedside tentatively, curling your fingers into the fabric of your jacket. Your palms feel sweaty, but even still you force yourself to reach out to the bed, grabbing hold of the scratchy sheets. From this close you can see the cotton hospital gown that he wears beneath the covers, and as your eyes roam you catch glimpses of the hardened scars on his infamous fist.
Then your gazes connect. Before you can say anything else… without any thought words slip through your lips and escape you.
“Taesoo… your eye.”
Alarmed, you feel an uncomfortable plummet to your stomach as you scan over his face. Your fingers feel numb as you squeeze your hands into the fabric of the hospital sheets. Leaning over his broad chest, your mortified expression is highlighted in the warm lamplight. “What happened?”
His chapped lips part, but he remains speechless. The fires that once lit his eyes had been extinguished, left glossy and damp. He looks so overwhelmed. So lost.
You don’t see the confidence. Or the ferocity.
At the moment, he doesn’t even look intimidating. Just vulnerable. Your King… the King of Ansan… looks vulnerable.
“James Lee…” he mumbles. In a parched voice, he uttered a name you would never forget. The name of a man you swore to defeat.
His solitary dark eye was unfocused and hazy, staring up at you as if he didn’t recognize who you were. As though you weren’t his most loyal follower.
You didn’t blame him for thinking you had left him. That’s what everyone else thought. “His lady walked out on him as soon as he lost his eye.”
“Only there for the looks I guess.”
“Unfaithful-”
“Whore—”
No one seemed to understand the rage that had stemmed from Taesoo and into you. The vengeance that boiled in the pit of your stomach as you curled your fists into balls and buried your face in the hospital sheets.
James Lee.
Hot, angry tears streamed down the side of your face as you looked up at Taesoo. You held him in your bleary sight. The reddened splotch, empty socket, permanent scars. Ever handsome.
But he would change. Deny himself. You knew that, and you couldn’t bear the thought.
You wiped your eyes and swore to yourself. You wouldn’t let that man hurt your King anymore. You would protect your King of Ansan, no matter the cost.
If you had to break your body. Sell your soul. Shatter your bones and rebuild them again. You would do it. As long as you never had to look down at Taesoo with pity ever again.
You would defeat James Lee.
If a man couldn’t do it, then surely a woman could.
I mean scientifically… probably not but UH
PTJ bobbing off with unrealistic… stuff. So I will too 🤷♀️
150 notes
·
View notes
Queerness in Indian Media
↳Film: MAJA MA (2022, Hindi) dir. ANAND TIWARI
Maja Ma follows Pallavi Patel (Madhuri Dixit), a closeted lesbian who gave up her beloved, Kanchan (Simone Singh), decades ago and has since become a devoted mother, housewife, and adored member of her community. While making preparations for her son's (Ritwik Bhowmik) wedding, however, Pallavi is outed to the entire town--and subsequently must deal with the consequences to herself, her former beloved, and her family.
Madhuri Dixit discusses her role in this movie, how movies like this are more possible now because of OTT streaming, and the "unexpected reactions" to the story here.
Madhuri Dixit discusses this movie coming from "a place of love", wanting the LGBTQ community to "feel seen", and "accepting people for who they are" here.
The actress Madhuri Dixit has been in multiple gay and gay-coded media, both as a supportive character and as the gay character herself. She has also been supportive in real life of the LGBTQ community.
60 notes
·
View notes
On the train and wanted to give you some blorbo time. When do you think Tara realized she wasn’t straight? (Also, unrelated: do I really have to say that “Songs About Death” by The Wonder Years is Carpenter sisters-coded?)
(i loved songs about death and i agree it is very carpenter sisters coded <3)
i like this idea i've seen before here on tumblr of woodsboro being a small, religious town. tara's parents getting married for convention right before they graduated high school, as soon as sam was born, and, with it, the carpenters being the kind to try to look like your perfect american family. this would make the impact of sam and tara's dad leaving even harder, because this dream in particular was ruined and the façade fell and shtuff. but anyway-
i believe queerness wasn't something they spoke about, at all. it was only the whole "women are meant to be with men" and "men are meant to be with women" and that's it.
as a child, tara didn't have much of a reference. she only had her bedtime stories about princes and princesses, male and female toys to make husbands and wives and the little dollhouses. she never thought much of it.
sometimes, when she was on her own, she did mix up and make different pairings, such as putting two female barbies to sleep on the same bed. she thought to herself that it was simply because she had less ken's to play around, but she never treated any of them as males and kept them as couples.
when her dad left, of course, her mother decided to not give a shit about anything and sam changed, so tara was left to discover who she was all on her own, leaning onto her friends for support as they all navigated growing up together.
tara and amber, in particular, had always been inseparable. you know, the whole childhood best friends thing: both were super clingy and amber was totally possessive and overprotective of tara, her best friend, and would push any kids that tried to bully her from the playgrounds.
they were the kind to always walk holding hands, the kind to share lunch and sit together and have almost daily sleepovers that they didn't even need permission to, because their parents wouldn't notice nor mind them missing.
tara always loved her; something childish and pure, an innocent love that she had never even thought about.
but puberty came, and talks about who's cute and who's not, and first kisses, and first dates and boyfriends and girlfriends became a natural thing in her group. tara was never unsure of her attraction to men. she knew she could see herself dating one or getting married to one – but women were always a tricky subject, one she could recognize, but chose not to tackle.
everyone felt a little bit jealous of her best friend starting to get attention, right?
amber was always more of an extrovert between the two of them; with that, it was natural that she had made a lot of new friends, and, of course, people would fall for her charm pretty easily. and it bothered tara endlessly.
she thought it was natural to feel her chest tighten at the sight of amber laughing at something bethany from her film club said. to not want to share her best friend's attention with jimmy from chem lab, who everyone knew had the biggest crush on amber, because she was afraid she'd want to hang out with him instead of her.
she'd ignore the way her heart would be crushed at the mere thought of amber liking him back, of her having her first kiss with him, of her ever actually dating him.
(not because she wanted amber, but because she was her best friend, and she didn't want to lose her, of course. she didn't like girls. not like that.)
until mindy came out, and tara was vehemently supportive. they were at the meeks household, and mindy started talking about her experience, about how she had butterflies in her stomach whenever a pretty girl smiled at her, how her cheeks flushed whenever she thought about kissing one, and holding one, and calling someone their girlfriend.
it all felt way too familiar for tara's liking.
she became more self aware after that; of how she loved playing with amber's soft, dark hair, how she felt so safe cuddling with her whenever they watched something, how she'd blush when amber gave her a compliment and called her pretty.
how she thought amber was the prettiest girl she had ever seen.
32 notes
·
View notes
Why is it called "misery" in French when it looks do happy??
Just look at her with her little flower! And she's preparing many others! OwO
It's crazy to think she just started as a simple stem that broke from her original plant and that I took back home.
Now she has grown so much :'3
Just wanted to share my Tradescantia pallida for my birthday, she deserves to be seen :)
5 notes
·
View notes