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multiverse-imagines · 1 year

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um… so I literally just binged read all your Vash fics. Planning on watching the anime on Saturday.

but I’m even tho I’m a newcomer……

can I get a Vash x Reader, where maybe homeboy gets her pregnant.

👉👈

he’s already taking over my life…

A/N: so I'm not typically comfortable with writing this kind of thing, but for specifically you, (and Vash) just this once, I'll indulge a pregnancy fic request. It gave me a chance to think about things I don't want to write in the future. It's my fault for not putting it in my pinned post. I will say this was one of the cutest things I've written in Vash's pov, and probably how I would react if I got told I was gonna be a dad. I do appreciate getting out of my comfort zone sometimes. ^-^

On the lighter notes, I'm so excited for you to be joining the Trigun cult we've amassed on Tumblr! Give the manga a read too if you can! Don't worry about being a newcomer. I've only been in this fandom for a year. (Where has he been all my life?) It's never too late to start a new series!!! If you want someone to gush about the series with, hit me up!

I've only had Vash for a year, and in my head we've already been married for 10. xD

Sprout

I carried a box of donuts, sandwiches, and a couple of sodas towards City Hall, where she worked. She, My Lovely Mayfly, worked there as a volunteer coordinator. I decided to surprise her with lunch. She always works herself too hard, and sometimes forgets to eat. I entered the main lobby, quickly finding the office she worked in. It was empty. I came in early enough where she wouldn't have gone to lunch with anyone else. The hairs on my neck stood on end as I thought of the worst. Making my way back to the front desk, I asked the receptionist where she was.

"Oh, She went out for a bit. She said she had a doctor's appointment. Said she'd hopefully be back by lunch." The receptionist took a sip of his coffee. A doctor's appointment? She hadn't said anything about an appointment this week. Before I could make my way back to her office to wait, a chime of the front door revealed someone entering City Hall. I turned around to see her, My Mayfly. She almost seemed troubled, looking at the ground, not quite noticing me yet.

"Hey, Mayfly!" I cheerily greeted her as always. She seemed to stiffen up, but was immediately happy to see me.

"H-hey, Angel. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I brought us some lunch! How was your appointment?" She stiffened up again at this.

"Why don't we eat lunch!" She seemed to panic as she dragged me into her office, shutting the door, almost too quickly. She leaned against the door with a sigh. She was acting strange, well, more so than usual.

"Mayfly, is something wrong?" I let my voice drop to a concerned tone. Her breath hitched, and the facade of being around other people faded. Her face was almost… scared. Vulnerable, Worry, such things I never wanted to see on her face.

"Do you remember when I said sometime last week that I was feeling kinda funny?"

"Y-yeah, I thought it was the burger from the bar."

"Well, it wasn't the burger, I guess…"

"You didn't get sick, did you? You're not dying are you?" I began to worry. Humans didn't live too long on this planet. Taking a chance with her as my partner was a struggle for me. I often distance myself from others where I can, even though it doesn't ease the pain when they die. We had spoken on this topic a few times when I tried to deny her advances, even though every fiber of my being wanted her. What if she really was dying? I couldn't take her with me as I continued to run from bounty hunters and the like.

"Vash." My name leaving her lips broke my panic, and I hadn't even noticed she had taken my hands, "I'm not dying. I…." She took a deep breath, "I'm pregnant."

"P-pregnant." I repeated back to her, "wh…what?" My face relaxed from panic to surprise as my gaze drifted to her hips, "I.. I didn't think that was even possible." A wave of emotion was flowing through me all at once. How was my DNA compatible with human DNA? How was I supposed to keep the two of them safe? Raising a child on the run? What if Knives targeted them? What if I died before I could see the kid go to school? Or get married? Oh, Rem, help me. What if they died young? What if I lost Mayfly during the birthing process? What if I lost both of them?

My body moved on its own as I leaned down to press a kiss to her lips. I rested one hand on her back, the other rested on her cheek. I allowed my mind to clear as I lost myself in her kiss.

I whispered her name when I parted from her lips. Holding her chin to keep intimate eye contact.

"I love you. Let's have a family together." I found myself laughing a little bit as a smile came across my face. The laughter spread as I pressed more little kisses to her lips, "I'm gonna be a dad." I toyed with the idea of teaching the little sprout how to color, ride a Tomas, reading them bedtime stories, falling asleep with them cradled into my chest on our ragged couch, and even teaching them good morals if I could help it.

"I'll keep you both safe. I promise."

#trigun #vash the stampede #vash x reader #trigun brain rot #tw: pregnancy

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im-a-king-baby · 8 months

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I love ELYN, it was a wonderful read. 🪷

<333

Today's bonus scene is a post-epilogue snippet, because Kevan is one of my favourite characters who barely appeared in the actual fic XD

Under the cut for maaaajor ending spoilers! Go read ELYN first!

“The band should have arrived,” Simon checks his phone, for about the twentieth time since getting out the car that had picked them up at the airport. “Normally we’d meet in the bar, have a drink.” He looks across the lobby to the hotel bar, racks of liquor stretching up to the ceiling.

Wilhelm catches his hand. “The schedule I got said we were meeting for dinner,” he says. He’s pretty sure Simon knows that, but sometimes it helps to have someone else say it out loud. “So let’s check in, and you can have a shower while I ask Farima what time.”

“Right.” It takes Simon a second too long to drag his eyes away from the bottles. He keeps tugging on the straps of his backpack, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

Wilhelm had asked widely around for advice on how he could support Simon going back to playing live shows but the consensus from everyone was just, ‘It’s going to be hard, but if he wants to tour again you have to start somewhere.’

“Hey! Si…imon!”

Wilhelm barely has a chance to jump before someone is bounding across the lobby. He’s a huge man with long black hair dressed in a leather jacket with silver studs and for an instant Wilhelm wonders if he should be throwing himself in front of Simon - where are the bodyguards when you need them?

Then he registers that Simon is laughing. “You can keep calling me Simme,” Simon says, stepping past Wilhelm so the man can pull him into what looks like a bonecrushing hug. “I don’t mind.”

“Oh thank god,” the man says, letting Simon go and stepping back. “Farima keeps sending emails about ‘Simon’ and I’m like ‘who?’ every single time.” He notices Wilhelm for the first time, slightly off to the side in his carefully nondescript jumper and jeans combo. “Let me guess, you’re the boyfriend formerly known as Prince?”

Simon snorts. “Kevan, this is Wilhelm. Wille, Kevan. He plays guitar.”

And now Wilhelm remembers him from the Faktory, standing off to the side of the stage with a red guitar. And the name, too. Kevan was the person Simon called in Bjarstad, the one who told Candace where to find them. Wilhelm’s first instinct would be to keep him far away from Simon, but he’s aware that - as much as he doesn’t like it - the Candace Issue is more complicated on Simon’s side.

Simon met her for coffee, when he was in L.A. and Wilhelm was stuck in class a million miles away, and Wilhelm’s phone left imprints in his palm he was gripping it so tight waiting for a phone call that didn’t come, just a text two hours later: she’s gone, all still standing and heading to the airport. See you soon xx

Here and now, Simon seems relaxed for the first time since they entered the lobby, flicking the studs on Kevan’s jacket and saying, “Did you listen to the EP?”

“I did. Not really my thing,” Kevan says, but with a grin as though this is some shared joke between them. “But we can add more guitar solos when you record the full album.”

Simon snorts a laugh, like he hasn’t been up all night for the last week worrying about The Full Album. “Let’s get through these shows first.”

“Speaking of, I did need to catch you.” Kevan’s smile drops. “There’s a problem with my schedule.”

Fuck. Wilhelm steps a bit closer to Simon as his laugh dies and he casts a desperate look towards the check-in desk and escape. “The schedule isn’t really my area,” Simon starts. “Can you talk to Farima about it?”

“No,” Kevan says. “I think I need you.” He’s already pulling out his phone. “See, I’ve got the dinner tonight, rehearsals tomorrow, shows Friday and Saturday, but in the middle I have something called a ‘day off’? I told them, this is a Simme tour we don’t do that here -”

The tension drops entirely out of Simon’s body. "Oh my god," he says, shoving at Kevan’s shoulder, the kind of easy roughhousing that he would've done with Ayub or Rosh back at school. “You’re such an asshole.”

Kevan uses his height advantage to ruffle Simon’s hair then takes off running before Simon can retaliate. Simon is laughing, but pauses to kiss Wilhelm’s cheek and shove his backpack into Wilhelm’s arms before chasing Kevan across the lobby, scattering guests and hotel staff in all directions.

Wilhelm slings Simon’s bag over his shoulder and heads to the desk, only glancing back every other second. “Simon Erikkson and Wilhelm Kassel, I think our bags have already been dropped off.”

She digs out some paperwork for him to sign - he’s still figuring out his signature, still forgetting to respond for a minute when he hears ‘Mr Kassel’ - and she’s coding up two keycards when Simon stumbles back up against the counter, breathing hard.

“Hey, sorry. Didn’t mean to abandon you,” he says, and Wilhelm can’t blame him for it when he’s still smiling like that, lighting up his whole face.

He had kind of understood what Simon said about wanting to be back on stage - in that he could see it was something a person might want, even if the idea of doing it himself made him want to throw up - but he’d thought the touring was a necessary evil that went with that, not something that could possibly be enjoyed. When Simon had arranged these first shows for Spring Break so Wilhelm could come along, Wilhelm had just assumed it was so that he’d have someone other than Farima there to fall back on.

But as Kevan falls into step with them on the way to the elevator, talking about dinner plans like booking a table at a restaurant is the most outlandishly posh thing that any person has ever done, he realises maybe for Simon it was about showing Wilhelm this other side of his life. To show that he’s not alone out here.

“Di was asking if we need to dress for dinner,” Kevan says. “I said I didn’t think we should go naked but I’d check with you.”

Simon elbows him in the side. “I think we can be us,” he says. “It’s not -” he pauses as Wilhelm presses the button to call the lift, waits for the doors to open and them to step inside before he continues. “It’s just to keep it out of the bar, you know?” Wilhelm steps closer, so their knuckles touch and Simon gives him a sideways smile. “Things are going to be a bit different this time.

Wilhelm half expects Kevan to make another joke, but Kevan nods, like he gets it. “You let us know what you need, yeah? We’re all rooting for you here.”

#bonus content meme #elyn fic #I feel like these snippets keep getting longer #oops #sorry not sorry #why is his name kevan instead of kevin?#nobody knows

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xxtc-96xx · 1 year

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Why you gotta do him like that though? Like admittedly I don't follow your mew comics all closely but I really enjoy your art.

But like? Why you do him like that? And then post memes and cute stuff immediately afterwards??? Bruh?

At 10, intense physical and mental trauma, tonight, only on HBO...

Then...

Stick around for Saturday Night Live! At 12:30. Ain't Jim Carrey a kidder?

I guess what I'm saying is...

I can't WAIT for part 3 BABEY

Cuz that’s just how it’s always been here XD memes and angst roulette

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awwyeah107 · 3 months

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So...I haven't made any fan art in years. And I haven't ever posted it online. But here I am with some drawings of a dress for a fanfic author's OC, and I'm quite happy with them.

These are some mockups of a dress that I pictured Mellótë wearing; she's an OC in the Silmarillion fanfic Daughters of Therindë by @darkfrozenabyss.

(I tried to draw Mellotë's face and hair. I really did. However, that gave me a lot of trouble, so in the end I decided it was okay to simply have the dresses be on a model XD Perhaps one day I'll try to actually draw her features.)

Made with the app Sketchbook on my dad's iPad.

Skirt design (and part of the first top design) is based off this dress. The second top design is completely mine. The third top design with the veil is based off of this other dress, and the fourth is the same thing without the veil.

Further description of why I made these, their inspiration, and my process below the cut :)

This came from a conversation in the comments of chapter 11 of Daughters of Therindë. In my comment, I mentioned that I had noticed a line about Mellótë's hair brushing her shoulder, and it prompted me to ask about what she was wearing. darkfrozenabyss replied, "I was picturing something gauzy and light pink, a one-shoulder gown that flares more at the bottom."

After that conversation, the next time I got onto Tumblr, I got an ad featuring the dress below that immediately made me think of that description—except for the fact that it was not one-shoulder.

It made me think, "Hmm, what would it look like if that was one-shoulder? What would it look like if she did wear it?" And thus my idea to draw the dress was born.

As mentioned above, I used the app Sketchbook to create the drawings. I imported that photo of the dress into the app as a layer, and I traced over the dress and the girl wearing it in a new layer. Then I made use of copious layers to get the texture and design of the skirt the way I wanted it to look.

I had had a couple ideas for what the top design would look like, and I worked on those designs after the skirt. My immediate thought was to move one of the wrap-around sleeves (I'm not sure what to call them) from the original dress up onto the shoulder and make it a bit thicker, so that is the first top design. I also had the idea to make a small little ruffle sleeve over the shoulder with a flower or brooch connected to a top without any additional texture. After I made those, I felt like there was still another possible design I could do that would look/fit better, so I scrolled through the dress website for one-shoulder dresses to use as inspiration. I found this dress with a veil (linked above as well) and really liked it, so I imported one of the photos and loosely traced it. Then I adjusted the tracing and added my own texturing and color to it. I think the design works both with and without the veil, so I included both versions.

Also, I had started on this drawing at around midnight on a Saturday night, thinking "Oh, I'll just start this and then continue tomorrow." Then after intensely focusing on getting the skirt coloring and texture down, I decided I should check the time (it doesn't show in the app for some reason)...and saw it was nearly 3 AM. XD I did continue the next day, gave it a rest for a couple days, came back to it, and then gave it a couple more days' rest and decided the designs looked complete enough that I was ready to post them.

From scrolling through darkfrozenabyss' drawings on Tumblr, I think the third or fourth designs would most likely be what Mellótë would wear out of these designs. Maybe the fourth more than the third. What do you think @darkfrozenabyss? I could be totally wrong in my guess, or maybe none of them would be anything close to what she would wear. XD

Anyway, it was a lot of fun working on these! I'm quite happy with how they turned out. I particularly love the bottom edges of the skirt—I feel like I was able to capture some of the gauzy layers. This is also the first time I've ever done really dedicated digital art, so I enjoyed the experience.

#daughters of therindë #fanfic #fan art #fanfiction art #digital art #dresses #dress art #my art

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teen-cups-au · 9 months

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WIP Game

Guess what's going on. Comment or reblog with your answer!

Doudy (mod): Preview Sunday. About time, this break feels like foreveeeeeeeeer! And the page isn't even ready, had an artblock haha (planned to prepare stuff the 2nd half of July, big fail).

Anyway, here's a lil' game for you meanwhile!

Edit:

I MEANT PREVIEW SATURDAY! TODAY! POSTING RN!!! AND NEW PAGE TOO oh boy it's hard to get back into it XD

#cuphead #cuphead au #teen cups au #teen cups #the cuphead show #wip #ooc #doudy

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piracytheorist · 6 months

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So I decided to do something crazy, and I went and bought the eighth manga volume.

I know, I know! Its chapters will only now start getting adapted. I am aware and in fact, as I got it I didn't even open it or look at the back cover.

And yes, I haven't even bought volume 6 or 7 yet, but I wanted to try reading the "new" chapters in printed form. I still only have that same laptop that makes reading digital chapters difficult and distracting from immersion, so I decided I can try and buy this volume so I can go chapter by chapter from a physical copy. I mean, I already have the digital copies available at any given moment, and I intended on buying the volume later anyway, so it's not like I believe it will be an extra temptation or that I would have changed my mind about continuing on buying the manga volumes.

If my calculations are correct, the upcoming episode this Saturday will include the last chapter from volume 7 and the first chapter from volume 8, so after watching it I can read the former digitally and the latter physically, and see if that makes the manga reading even more interesting.

I would have bought more volumes, but I'm a little tight on money right now. My paycheck will come in about two weeks so I think then I can buy 6, 7 and even 9, and be prepared for the respective episodes!

For now, my collection is a little wonky but it'll get there!

I won't lie, it was really strange to get the volume in my hands and resist the temptation of turning it over to see the back cover or flipping through it. WHAT OTHER ANIME ONLY GOES TO SUCH LENGTHS. I was so giddy holding it and yet I was like "Must not turn over. Must not open. Resist the spoilers."

So for now it will sit in the drawer I keep the rest of the volumes in (I don't have a shelf but I do have lots of drawers for such uses XD) and I will slowly go through it, week by week, until its last chapter is adapted into the anime! And if I find it an interesting way of going through the story right after watching the episodes, I will probably continue doing so for as long as I can easily get my hands on a copy.

I may actually have trouble finding some volumes. Volumes 1 and 3 I got from Book Depository, which has now closed, and volumes 2, 5 and now 8 I got from a Greek comic chain store, which only has up to volume 9 available. Volume 4 I got from Blackwell's, which may be my only choice of buying newer volumes aside from amazon, since I don't want to support amazon. But I guess volumes past 9 will be a problem for the Nette of next year, lol.

#nette speaks #sxf

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tobiasdrake · 6 months

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Well, chief. I guess this is it. Thanks for everything, and I'll see you aro-- Oh, we aren't finished yet.

Goddammit.

Hypothetically speaking, if you were going to be alone with a man who might try to kill you, what size of knife would you carry on your person and where would you stash it? Asking for a friend.

Are you, though? You know in a Saturday Morning Cartoon when the adult guardian goes, "The plot is happening but YOU will go to your room and behave yourself. You will NOT slip out and go do the thing."

But this is like episode 87 and we all know they're going to slip out and go do the thing anyway so, really, saying this is just a formality at this point?

That's your level of authority, Yakou. Thank you so much for saving my life from my terrible mistakes last chapter; Anyways, back to doing the things that got me in trouble in the first place!

I'll write him a note and leave it in Halara's hotel room, along with an IOU formally requesting that they deliver it to Yakou upon confirmation of my death.

I obviously won't be able to pay the IOU but at this point I'm pretty sure Halara only cares about the optics of charging money.

Kurumi, I took you to meet my dangerous, ambiguous wildcard contact. There's a 50/50 chance he's going to tie you to a chair and dangle you over a vat of acid before all is said and done. We are well past the point where something as innocuous as worry is inappropriate.

OH THANK GOD. Of Death. Literally. Thank you for finally ending this awkward quasi-farewell, Shinigami.

We're running out of good ideas to escape from this sub. This is one step above pointing behind Yakou and shouting, "LOOK, A FALSE LEAD!" then bolting when he turns around.

Because then it will spoil. The best kinds of evidence have an expiration date!

Yuma finally proving that abandoning all pretense and bailing at the speed of feet is, and always has been, a viable option for dodging Yakou's paper-thin attempts at professional responsibility.

Sorry, man, but you-

HAHAHAHA OKAY, Yuma made me laugh but I was unprepared for Kurumi to then also bolt out the door. XD Run, guys! Yakou looks like he maxes out at a shamble! A brisk jogging pace should do!

To be fair, she does not work here. It'd be uncomfortable for her to stick around someone else's workspace without her one and only connection to this place.

Sorry, Yakou. As hard as you're going to kiss her ass, Kurumi is not interested in becoming your intern. She's here for Yuma. And she is as much of a troublemaker.

HOLY SHIT YOU GODDAMN VAMPIRE

I legit did not turn the camera to check the fireplace. He may have been here for this entire scene thus far.

I KNOW RIGHT!? We need to put a bell on him. Wait, no, bell only chimes when you move. ...one of those perpetual motion clicky ball sets that managers have on their desk to make them look important. He can wear it around his neck.

You heard as much as Yakou, man. Yuma was super cryptic and then fled.

*sigh* Okay, what's Desuhiko pulling this time, Vivia? Is the pale blue blink supposed to be Fubuki? But then the storm would be... him getting the shit kicked out of him....

Ugh, I don't have time for his shenanigans, I have a trap to go die in.

For a man who was all gung-ho about box cutting my throat out, you sure don't seem to be in any rush to do it. I think Vivia used up all of his energy trying to stand up dramatically.

How are you going to feel if I die before you have a chance to kill me, Vivia? Can you live with that regret? Or... I guess, since you want to die someday, maybe not being able to live with that regret would be a good thing.

I guess. Keep doing what you're doing and hope for the worst, my guy. Power of positive thinking!

#master detective archives: rain code #drake plays rain code

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elvenbeard · 1 year

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Elven goes Comic Park Artist Alley 2023

Here it is, the post I threatened to make! It's gonna be long and full of ramblings, but I wanted to write everything down and idk, maybe you'll find it interesting to read! xD

So, this was my first time tabling at an artist alley. I had applied to another con near-ish me a couple of times in the past but never got accepted, so I was quite floored when it worked here at first try this time around xD I was hella nervous all the way up until the day I actually had to go and leave for some reason. Beforehand, I gathered some inspo at other cons for table setups and invested a little bit in one of those wire-shelf thingies, cause since it's very modular I would have also been able to make good use of it if it turns out artist alleys aren't my thing after all. I got a small collection of prints printed, I wanted to stick with a theme (namely, my original fantasy stuff, since fanart is a legal grey area and I wanted to be on the safe side - also, themes are nice!).

I managed to fit everything I needed for the table into two big Ikea bags and left on Friday noon for the con (we were allowed to set up starting at 2pm that day, the actual con starting on Saturday at 9am). I also set up two small shelf units for putting on the table upfront to save some time!

My cat was not impressed.

Setup and everything worked out without problems, the helpers were all super kind and welcoming. The only thing that was kinda chaotic was that the con organizers and the owners of the location (the artist alleay was in a whole new building, and the location overall is insanely pretty) seemed to kinda work against each other in a way xD Communication didn't quite work, and I think if we as artists and our helpers had received at least some kinda document or ID or a little coloured wristband that said "exhibitor" or something, it would have prevented a lot of arguments and delays. But alas, maybe next year!

Since I had a quite long drive and didn't wanna do that twice every day, I stayed at a hotel nearby. It felt a little like a mini vacation, which was nice xD Cost-wise, I would have ended up paying the same amount in gas that I paid in hotel fees.

As I said, as soon as my table was set up, all nervousness from before had kinda vanished and despite my days starting super early and ending very late, I had a blast overall xD Only thing is, I didn't sleep well (but I rarely do when I know I have to get up early, the anxiety of missing my alarm haunts me in my dreams).

My view for the weekend xD I love how creative some of the other artists' setup was, let alone how amazing their art was! There was a huge variety of styles and products, from prints to pins to handmade jewelry and plushies, and I didn't even get the chance to see it all xD

I guess this being my first table and the fear of accidentally missing out on a conversation with someone who likes my stuff I kinda didn't dare to venture very far from my table xD So I didn't see much of the rest of the con, but thankfully a lot of people found their way to the artist alley anyway! My personal highlight was having the ultimate, first-hand V experience. I randomly look to the right, and suddenly:

Johnny fucking Silverhand! Including an ominous duffle bag that might have said NUKE... or NIKE, not sure... (find him on instagram @_iggyizzy_). Had a short convo with him both days, he was absolutely living his role, and yes xD Best quote that'll stay with me: "Don't make me laugh, or my beard is gonna come off!" Cosplay problems, I relate so hard :D

Some other highlights:

Explaining my dark fantasy world and setting with the target group "21+" to some very enthusiastic young kids who liked the pretty pictures xD

Talking to other creative people and seeing their projects - also loved the fact that there were several others tabling for the first time, and they all had different approaches that I all loved!

In general being told my art is good by complete strangers who know nothing about it was a huge ego and morale boost xD And being able to talk about a very dear-to-me project I'm passionate about in general was awesome

Talking to likeminded people who got inspired what I was doing <3

Nerding about my favourite video games with people

People really liking my inktober stuff a lot, which I wouldn't have expected

Ending the con with a long conversation with two cosplayers/gamers/creative people discussing tabletop games, Dragon Age, and Cyberpunk for about half an hour :D Was such a nice note to end the weekend on!

As I said, upfront I read up on some random resources online, some dos and donts and useful tips for artist alleys. Some of the tips really paid off ("pack a little emergency bag containing all sorts of materials to improvise if need be") which was useful to adjust some price tags and stuff! Others didn't quite turn out to be as accurate, with my most expensive item selling best in comparison to more affordable ones. I also hadn't planned on offering doodle commissions (which I'd seen people do at other cons) but I will definitely do if I ever get a table spot again, cause they were quite popular. And they made me realize once more why I miss doing commissions and will get back into them soon here, too!

Kinda negative things that come to mind regarding the whole experience are really minor actually, as I mentioned already the slightly chaotic organization here and there, but overall there were always good workarounds to that available, too. And I think/hope next time will work out better! A personal annoyance (but that is just my life in general xD) was getting misgendered quite a bit cause I'm not really passing, and me being too scared of irl confrontation in that reagard to correct people XD But I'm working on it. On the other hand, also had a really nice convo with a fellow queer dude about the abundance of pride flags and stuff, which was fun xD

And what I also learned is that the majority of people who do this regularly work Monday-Friday jobs... which makes sense, that enables you to go to cons on weekends, cause you always have the weekend off. Me, I get one weekend off per month at random (I could request specific days, but they're never guaranteed). So yeh... time to find a better dayjob I guess, if I wanna do this professionally xD Or luck out with my day off requests.

Anyway though... my personal takeaway and what I'd do differently next time:

I enjoyed the whole thing a lot more than I would have guessed

I'd make my stand more visibly lgbtq+ themed, to get people interested in queer fantasy art and writings that would walk past generic-looking dark elves

Also I'd add somewhere that this is an original project I'm working on, cause most people I got talking to assumed "oh this is just dnd stuff" and were pleasantly surprised when they learned "no, this is actually a whole setting and story"

I'm gonna wear a name tag with my pronouns on it (I wanted to do it this time but chickened out at the last moment, cause I'm just with one toe out of the closet irl and got too scared XD one challenge at a time)

I did like how my table was set up overall though and apart from some minor tweaks would set it up like this again

I would like to try to walk around more and get talking to other artists more, but I was too glued to my seat and table and everything (also, mild social anxiety, but everyone that I did talk to was so kind, so yeh XD one challenge at a time!!)

So yes. So much to my report on being at an artist alley the first time XD Would love to try it again some time, cause I had a blast, and cause of the stuff I'd like to improve on.

I still have a bunch of leftovers, too, posters, postcards, and a few booklets... But for now I'm gonna set up a Ko-Fi-Shop (which I'd wanted to do for a while) and put some things there for the time being. Once it's up and running a post will follow!

And if you read this far: thanks for reading ♥ xD

#personal stuff #drawing stuff #elven does artist alley

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k1ngj0ve · 1 year

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Had a long convo about Bisexual Pickles(the drummer), gonna edit it to be readable

(initially this was a convo about how Murderface would be into Semen Retention and claiming being with women is gay, and pickles doesnt get involved because hes had sex with men before)

Friend: I feel like one interpretation of Pickles could be that he doesn't think it's "gay" to have sex with men. so he thinks he's "straight" and that fucking the same gender occasionally is a thing EVERYONE DOES Me: pickles doesnt strike me as a 'has thought deeply about his sexual identity' or 'has done research on terminology'. if he has any terminology at all its some rare 80s term that was thrown around casually in 1 district of LA during a 2 year period. hes like 'oh im just what they used to call a butter nutter' and no one has any idea what that is

Friend: he's from the generation where "bisexual" means a girl fucking two men in porn or something, he never considered it's a label that can apply to real people

Me: this all came out because he was accidentally being interviewed by an lgbt magazine and didnt know it, having a great time with dudes that understand him and can relate to big gender-weird sex parties

and then the article comes out and its front page like 'pickles is bisexual' And hes SO MAD and he spends half the episode making a big deal about it, until someone finally defines it for him (i think swkisgaar wouldve been trying but wouldve reached a language barrier, hes getting so pissed)

until finally someone explains it to pickles and hes forced to deflate like "..oh. i guess that is.. what i .. am.. then… '. Hes so upset to have a label though. He wants himself to be UNLABELLED. he liked the mystery

Friend: Like a younger version of creed https://youtu.be/2JO3oJybBTw

Me: Thats funny XD "im not offended by gay people" and then relates about how he fucked this dude 15 times over a 3 day bender and how it was some of the best sex he ever had and they met up every saturday night for the entire summer until that dude came out to him as gay and pickles had to end it which always bummed him out because they had a real connection you know

Friend: the poor guy thought they were gay dating out and proud and it turns out Pickles didn't realize kissing another man in the mouth and holding his hand while getting ice cream is gay

Me: pickles talks about it in a way that strongly implies he was in love and wanted to spend the rest of his life with this dude, they bought a puppy together "but then i found out he was gay so i had to break up move out"

Friend: RIP

Me: in that dethklok way where youre just like "what the fuck goes on in your head, how do you think anything works"

Friend: he thought they would have to get a little purse dog and both of them would become hairdressers

Me: 'i dont wanna be a wedding planner'

Friend: "I don't want to move to San Francisco :("

Me: i am really pleased by my mental image of skwisgaar like yelling at pickles trying to explain that bisexuality is fine and normal but not having the language to do so. just fully not in english, and the parts in english Can Not Be PArsed. he means well and keeps trying to help and he just gets angrier every time

Finally screaming like 'SITS DOWN, SHUTS UP, YOUS GONNA LISTENS SHJSJFHEHSJAN' and then a plain looking person next to him clears their through slightly and goes "Skwisgaar says "Please sit down and be quiet, I have hired a swedish interpreter to help communicate" then gives this really heartfelt and informative speech telling pickles its okay to be who he is

#metalocalypse #pickles the drummer #bisexual pickles #snb pickles #skwisgaar skwigelf #dethklok

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indelibleevidence · 1 year

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Broken Wings, chapter 1 (Reller, M-rated)

Author's Note: Also on FanFiction.Net and AO3! Updating on Saturdays, because I made sure to actually finish the fic before I started posting it, to ensure I didn't consign it to WIP hell like my other WIPs. XD

Wow, this is going to be a lot of explaining, but here we go! First off, if you haven't read Strikethrough, Crossroads, and the Damaged Goods summaries for the rest of the fics that I haven't written in between Crossroads and this one, go do that first. There's also a one-shot called Stalling that's set a month or two before this fic, but it's not necessary reading to get what's going on here.

This fic contains suicidal ideation, suicidal distress, and a depiction of Remi at rock bottom. If you're in a bad place, it might be better if you don't read this right now. (And I hope you feel less terrible soon.)

Remi is a lot different from the Remi in Crossroads. She's got pretty much all of her memories from her Jane years back now, and is a little bit softer and less sweary, until she's provoked, and then she reverts to 'fuck you' mode. Much like Jane's 4x15/4x16 self in canon, she's overwhelmed by the weight of her past mistakes, as Remi and as Jane. She's definitely not on the 'yay, law enforcement' train, and is still mostly ACAB in nature, but she knows that at least Kurt and his team are well-intentioned, and their eyes are open to the corruption within the system (mainly because of the first set of tattoos). By this point in my timeline, she also has accepted the fact that she's in love with Kurt, but she'd die before she'd ever admit it to him.

Jane is referred to as a third person throughout this fic, because neither Remi nor Kurt are at the 'Jane and Remi are just two time periods sans memories for one person' stage of acceptance. Also because it's easier for me, as a writer, to differentiate between those different time periods and mindsets by just using the names she was going by at the time. I do think that in another year down the Damaged Goods timeline, both Remi and Kurt will stop referring to Jane as a separate entity, but Remi kind of needs it right now, and though Kurt is further down the line as seeing Jane as a part of Remi, he's still getting there too. So things might seem a little bit disassociative identity disordery, and I apologise to anyone who might stumble upon this who actually lives with DID and hates what I did with this. But Remi is compartmentalising a LOT, though interestingly enough, now she's seeing Jane as the better person, whereas before, she loathed Jane with the fire of a thousand suns. The difference a few memories can make...

This fic is complete, so I'll post updates on Saturdays, I guess. This is my first time actually finishing a multi-chaptered fic before starting to post, but I really didn't want to start posting another WIP that was going to hang around in limbo (I'm sorry, Remember to Forgive and Taken for Granted fans! I will get there, I hope!).

Lastly, I really have to thank nachosandcheeze for her enthusiasm for this AU, and her encouragement for me to keep writing for it. She's not the only one who's been lovely about it (and thank you to everyone who cares about my weird little enemies to lovers universe where Jane never quite made it back to her brain - really, you guys are fantastic!), but she's been pretty consistently poking me with metaphorical sticks, and making Remi gifsets, and squeeing over Reller, etc. - to the point where I showed her the half-scene I had written from a fic several fics away from where I'd left off with Crossroads, just to get it out of my brain. And she loved it so much that I wrote a bit more, and a bit more, until over 16k later, I ended up with this. So thank you again, nachos. You're proof that nagging a fic author for more story does actually work, sometimes! :D

Absently tracing the carving on the stone with her finger, Remi glanced over to the small vial of clear liquid on her nightstand. It sat on top of a small, leatherbound booklet—El Libro de la Eternidad—which she’d smuggled out of Peru, along with the stone brick from Machu Picchu. Maybe she should feel guilty that she’d stolen a couple of pieces of Peruvian history from its citizens, even if one of them was a loose brick, but after all the things she’d done in her short fuck-up of a life, her conscience was way past that. And the brick contained a carved message for her: RB 4 RB, Roman Briggs for Remi Briggs, along with binary code that pointed to Roman’s data caches, and a message that had made tears sting her eyes.

Hey, sis.

I got you something. I never solved this one.

I hope you can. I did my best.

May you outlive this… for both of us.

Your brother, always,

Roman

Even during his bitter feud with Jane—Remi still flinched to think of him ZIPped and claustrophobic in his FBI cell, even though she now remembered Jane’s reasons, and her anguish at her brother’s state—Roman had still been looking for a cure for her. He’d had his own, the one she’d stolen from Dr. Roga and used to cure herself—after all, Roman had died before he’d had the chance to benefit from it. But still, he’d hunted down more Stanton cells, which meant that now, Remi had a cure for ZIP poisoning all lined up.

She had everything she needed. If Roman’s cache intel was right, New York billionaire hypochondriac Ken Lee would trade El Libro de la Eternidad for the Stanton cells. Dr. Roga could synthesise a new cure, if Kurt approached her. And Remi would need that cure, because the ZIP on the nightstand would be going into her body, as soon as she laid the plan out for Kurt.

There was just one more thing left to do.

Setting aside Roman’s carving, she accessed the video recording setting on her phone, and held it up so that her face was visible. She’d made a video for her future self once before, to further Phase One of her grand plan by introducing Jane to Oscar, and verifying his trustworthiness.

And you know how that turned out, her internal critic whispered.

Swallowing hard, Remi made herself focus on the task at hand, ignoring the guilt gnawing on the synapses at the back of her mind. How was she going to start this thing? Saying hello seemed redundant.

“I know you’re suffering right now, and I’m sorry for that. You don’t remember your old life, and that’s intentional. Please, trust me when I say you shouldn’t go hunting for the finer details. I’m sparing you a lifetime of pain and futility by taking the ZIP, even though you might not be able to appreciate that.”

She sounded whiny as hell, but how else could she put it? She had to make future Jane understand that this was for the best.

“The only options, as I see them, are suicide or ZIP. I’ve got enough here that I should be able to wipe out any trace of my old memories. You might get a few flashes, but I hope you don’t. You don’t need to go through this again.”

If you weren’t such a coward, you’d just put a shotgun barrel in your mouth and pull the trigger. Maybe Jane would think she was cowardly. But she wasn’t afraid to die. She just didn’t want Kurt to have to suffer, knowing his wife was dead along with Remi.

“I’m doing this, instead of killing myself, because you have good people around you, people I’ve already hurt enough, and don’t want to hurt any more by making them lose you. You have loyal friends. A husband who loves you very much. Things will be hard for you at first, but you’ll build a life again, like you did before. And this time, you’ll know who did this to you, and why, and you won’t have me telling you to disregard your instincts and undermine the people you care about. I was misled, and betrayed, but I made bad choices, too. I was too stubborn to see it for so long, but the first time we were ZIPped, Jane found happiness, and a new purpose, and even though I still don’t think law enforcement is the shining star of morality… If you’re working with Kurt and his team, you’ll be working towards good things. Hold onto that.”

She took a breath, picking up the ancient Peruvian brick again.

“The one thing I want to tell you about is my—our—brother, Roman. Or Ian. That was his birth name, just like yours was Alice. Ian Kruger. Later, Roman Briggs. He wasn’t perfect, as I’m sure Kurt will tell you. But he was a follower his whole life, not a leader. He followed me, and our adopted mother, because he loved us, and didn’t want to be rejected. Jane hurt him too much, and he turned on her, and on Kurt, but deep down, he was a good man. He just wanted a loving family, to belong somewhere.”

She held the brick up in the camera’s sight. “I want you to keep this. Take care of it. This points to his last message from him to me, on his data caches. To Remi, I mean. Not the old version of Jane.” How did things get so confusing? “I have the actual message saved on my phone, so you should be able to see the message itself there. As for the brick, I took it from Peru, along with something to bargain with for a cure for your ZIP poisoning. Roman was looking for a cure for me, even while he knew I—the old Jane—was working to bring him down. He just wanted his sister back, I guess.”

If she kept this up for much longer, she was going to get too damn emotional, and there was no way she was willing to break down and cry on video. She had to cut this short. “Roman and I went through hell together, and that’s one of the things I don’t want you to remember anything about, so I won’t go into it. But we survived our childhood by relying on each other, and then our teenage years were the same, in a different way. We used to pass a South African rand coin our parents gave us back and forth, giving it to each other as a gift. It wasn’t worth much back then—and it’d buy even less now—but its symbolic value for us was priceless. For Roman, it was a comfort object. Jane buried him with it, so I don’t have it now, but I wanted you to know about it.”

She dug her fingernails into her palm, a technique she’d first used at the orphanage to keep outwardly calm, while a torrent of emotions churned within her. The pain centred her, making the grief easier to bear.

“Things went so wrong, but I never stopped loving Roman, even as Jane. And he never stopped loving me.”

She sighed, knowing she should say more, should give Jane more closure, but knowing she’d never be able to get through it on camera. Maybe she’d write Jane a letter, before Kurt ZIPped her.

“I hope you can build a life again, and find happiness. You sure as hell couldn’t do worse than I did. Please, look forward, not back. There’s nothing here but pain. Good luck.”

She threw down the phone and buried her face in her hands, breathing deeply, striving for the numbness that could get her through the final days of this life. Soon she’d fly to New York, and wipe the slate clean.

The end of my memories can’t come soon enough. I can’t do this anymore.

Three days later…

Kurt stared from the vial and hypodermic needle to his wife, a rapidly growing pit in his stomach. What…is happening here? What the hell, Remi?

“It’s okay,” she said, shrugging as though this was a foregone conclusion, a logical end to everything they’d battled through on their way to this moment. “I’ve made my peace with it. There’s nothing left here for me now. This is Jane’s world, and I don’t belong in it. At least…at least this way, you can get her back. Or as close to it as it’s possible to get.”

“It’s okay?” he finally managed to say, his throat choked with an intense mass of emotions that he couldn’t even begin to analyse right now. “Your identity is what makes you you, Remi. You’ve fought to defend it so damn hard, it nearly drove us apart for good. You’ve spent over a year getting so many of your memories back, and now you want a clean slate again? I know you remember how hard it was for you after Times Square, and after Cape Town.”

She wrapped her arms around herself, still not meeting his eyes. “The first time, you didn’t know who Jane was. Nobody knew. This time, everyone will. And she’ll have you, and your friends. It’s…easier that way. Even though I hated you when I found out what had happened to Sandstorm, at least I had…” She shook her head. “Anyway—Jane will adjust quickly. You can get the woman you married back, as she was.”

The words shook him, in so many different ways. He rubbed a hand over his face, floundering to make sense of everything.

To get his Jane back…it was everything he’d dreamed of for so long. During those ten months that Remi had gone off the radar, he’d been desperate to find a way to bring Jane back to the forefront of her mind. Aside from Bethany and work, it had been all he’d thought about, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel a spark of hope for that outcome now.

But it was all wrong. It was a fairytale. Jane had been a product of the situation she’d been in, from the bag in Times Square to not knowing who she was, to thinking she was Taylor Shaw and then discovering she wasn’t, to being tortured by the CIA—and then discovering she used to be Remi Briggs, daughter of the leader of a terrorist organisation. She’d become who she was because of the way things had been back then, the way her new life had unfolded, and there was no way to know how much of that would be replicated in a newly ZIPped Remi.

Remi. God… I… He swallowed hard, something akin to grief seeping into his bones.

“What about you? This is like…like mental suicide for a huge part of you. You really want to kill yourself that badly? Why not shoot yourself in the head? Jump off a building? Overdose on pills?” His voice was harsher than he meant it to come out—demanding, angry.

Terrified. He was goddamn terrified.

Remi flinched at his tone, finally looking into his eyes. “Because you don’t want to live without her. And if I did one of those things, you’d have to face that she’d never come back.”

He rose from the couch abruptly, the twister of conflicted emotions within him too much to handle if he stayed still. Tears filled his eyes as he stalked over to the kitchen, and he rested his palms on the worktop, his back to Remi, as he tried to breathe.

“So you really want to die?” he managed to ask.

“There’s nothing left for me. My mother, my brother, my friends, my cause, my convictions… Everything is gone, Weller. There’s no point in trying to rebuild. I’ve spent the past year not knowing what to do with myself, fucking things up…”

He turned on her, snarling, “There’s nothing left for you? Then what the hell am I? Why do you keep coming back? After everything that’s happened, you don’t care enough to stick around?”

She got to her feet, crossed the room, her eyes sad. “The only thing I care about in this life is you, and I hurt you constantly, just by not being Jane. This way, it kills two birds with one stone. My empty life goes away, and you get Jane back. You get to be happy, and I get to…forget.”

A tear slid down his cheek, and he dashed it away impatiently. “Remi…”

She reached up to brush another tear from the corner of his eye, her fingers gentle. “I don’t want either of us to hurt anymore. We’ve suffered enough.”

Staring down at her, he finally put names to the emotions within him. Fear and pain had been easy to identify on their own, but they were joined by a surge of something else, so strong and fierce and breathtakingly real that he could hardly bear it.

Remi… Fuck, I can’t lose you. I need you.

I love you.

Despite everything she’d done to him, all the mental torment she’d put him through, the bitter arguments they’d had, the misunderstandings and deceit that had shredded their trust in each other…he’d fallen for the whole of her, just as hard as he had for the Jane part of her. Remi was Jane, intensified. She’d called herself damaged goods, and he couldn’t disagree, but so was he. Remi understood him in a way Jane never could have on her own.

And he was suddenly, powerfully certain that she loved him just as much.

Unable to control himself, he pulled her into his arms, giving her a crushing kiss that seemed to shock the breath from her, even as she returned it just as ardently. Part of him wanted to reject this whole conversation, carry her to bed, fuck her until they were both too exhausted to do anything but fall asleep in each other’s arms.

But this was too serious to hide from, even temporarily. He had to make his position clear.

Wrenching away from her, he stalked over to the table, picked up the small bottle of ZIP and brought it to the kitchen sink. Unscrewing the lid, he poured the contents down the drain, then dropped the bottle and turned to Remi, who was staring at him as though he’d gone mad.

“What the hell?” she demanded.

“Listen to me,” he told her, his eyes locked on hers. “I will never use that stuff on you. Ever. It doesn’t matter to me that there’s a cure for ZIP poisoning all lined up. There’s no going back for us. I can’t just inject you and turn you back into the Jane you used to be. It wouldn’t work like that.”

She sighed, looking down at the splashes of ZIP remaining in the sink. “Better the devil you know than the angel you don’t?”

He cupped her face in both hands, making sure she couldn’t look away from his face. “You’re my devil, and my angel, and everything in between. Remi, the thought of losing you scares the hell out of me. You’re my wife, and you may not be the way you were when we got married, but you’re still the woman I fell in love with, deep down.”

She was frowning, shaking her head, and he rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes as she drew in a shaky breath.

“I love you, just as much as I did when you were Jane. You didn’t make it easy to get to know you, but every time you let me in a little more, I fell for you even further. I need you to stay you.”

“What?” She breathed the word, and he opened his eyes to find her visibly trembling. Her expression was a study in contradictions. Fear. Hope. Anger. Longing.

Kurt smiled sadly. “It’s too late. I already know you love me, too.”

She tore herself out of his arms, stepped out of his reach. “Stop it. This has gone far enough, Weller.”

“No. It hasn’t gone anywhere near far enough. You’re so scared of making yourself vulnerable, of being hurt again, that you’re hurting yourself so that I’ll never have that power over you.” He took a step closer, and she backed into the living room immediately.

He’d once mentally compared her to a trapped animal, defensively clawing and snarling out of fear. He saw that same distress in her now, and ached to hold her, even though it would only make the situation worse.

“I thought we were over this,” she said, her voice brittle. “I’m not Jane.”

“No, you’re not Jane. You’re Remi. I see you, the whole of you. I know exactly who you are, and I love you.”

She eyed the apartment door, her fists bunched at her sides and her jaw set.

“Don’t run from this. Please.” He took another slow, careful step, and though she backed up again, her eyes were on him once more.

“You never took off your wedding ring, even when you were telling me you hated me. You’ve opened up to me more than once. You’ve trusted me to keep you safe, and you’ve forgiven me for mistakes I’ve made, and I’ve done the same for you.”

She pulled at the ring on her finger, trying to remove it. “You can believe what you want to believe, but it’s not true. It was just about sex and anger, and then we became friends with benefits. That’s it.”

He caught hold of her left hand and held it between his, before she could take off the wedding band. “You didn’t even want to admit you wanted me, back when we first realised we still needed each other. Even when you were halfway to coming. Is it gonna be the same now?”

She snorted, but didn’t try to yank her hand free from his. “What, you think you’re gonna fuck a confession of love out of me? It’s not the same thing, Weller.”

“Is that what it’s gonna take?” He couldn’t pretend he was surprised. They’d resolved so many of their other issues through arguing their way into sex. Why would this be any different?

Her jaw trembled before she firmed it, glaring at him. “No, because it won’t work. It’s not true.”

With anyone else, he’d take that as their final answer. A rejection that he’d have to accept and move on from. But with Remi, things had never been straightforward and simple.

She tested him at every turn, refusing to take anything he said at face value, and this thing with the ZIP was likely a part of it. He wanted to believe that was all it was—a manipulation, a shock tactic designed to scare him into laying all his cards on the table—but his gut told him otherwise.

She would never have risked him saying yes to her offer to ‘become Jane again’ if she hadn’t been prepared to accept the consequences. She was too proud to back down from something she’d said she’d do. And that meant that she really was at a desperate end point, unable to find a way to move forward from the ruins they’d left of her pre-ZIP life.

Kurt needed her to see that he could help her find the path, if she’d only trust herself to walk it. But first, she had to know he wasn’t going anywhere, that he wasn’t just settling for a doppelgänger until he decided to stop clinging to Jane’s memory.

And they both had to be clear where they stood with each other.

“Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me.”

Remi stared at him, for a moment seeming completely taken aback. Then her protective bravado and anger kicked in. “You say ‘jump’, I say ‘how high’? No!”

Even as he understood her reasons for refusing—knew she was just trying to protect herself—her words still stung.

“I love you, Remi.” He shrugged, standing straighter as he laid out his challenge. “If you don’t feel the same way, I need to know. So come on—break my heart.”

God, this is going to hurt.

He believed that she loved him. But whether she’d ever admit it to herself, let alone to him, was another story entirely.

#broken wings #damaged goods #reller #blindspot #blindspot fanfic #canon divergence #really hope this posts coherently #the post editor is weird today

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