Can I request la squadra with a reader with a biting problem? NOT in a kinky way, like they basically chew on anything they can like a dog. That pen that someone lost? Readers chewing on it. The strings on your hoodie are busted? They were chewed on by reader. THANK YOU 🙏
La Squadra x Reader with a Biting Problem Headcanons
I'm so sorry for taking so long to get to this 😅😅 been focusing on other stuff lately and been forgetting to write
Formaggio
- Oh he also has a biting problem!!
- If you had a nickel for every time you saw Formaggio get ink all over him for biting a pen too hard, you'd get two nickels
- He doesn't mind your bad habit, he thinks it's adorable!
- It's not a big deal to him, just another cute quirk you both share
- Bite him he'd bite you back <3
Illuso
- He's going to act disgusted even though you know he has the same biting habit
- You'd loan him a pencil and he'd return it with the eraser accidentally bit off
- He's in complete denial about it though. Might try to convince you that you did it.
- He's a terrible liar and stubborn so it's useless trying to argue about it
- Tease him and he'd get so pouty about it, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes at you
Prosciutto
- Okay yeah I think he's the only one who doesn't share anything with you because he fears you chewing on his stuff
- And also unfortunately for you he will always be in someone's business
- He'd see you chew on the neckline of your shirt and he'd lightly scold you like "What are you, a goat? Stop it."
- I promise you he can be caring about it
- For example he cares a lot about the condition of your clothes. That's why you don't chew on it. See, he's helpful.
Pesci
- He's a chronic biter too, but he does it out of nerves!
- Constantly asks if you're okay when he sees you fidgeting and biting something
- Sure he knows you just do it when you're bored, but this man is always stressed and worries that you might be getting anxious over something too
- Pesci has a bad habit of biting his nails, thinking about you both reminding each other to break the habit!
- Pesci is just super supportive, having someone like him to help him to stop biting is a major relief
Melone
- Melone doesn't care for the most part, he just asks you to refrain from chewing around his juniors
- He doesn't like to think about the chaos that'd bring if Babyface decided to eat anything and everything they see because they wanted to copy your behavior
- But Melone is ever the teasing type, he sees you chewing on a pen or him, and he's always going to make it something more than it actually is
- Like he's the kind of guy to ask for one of your chewed up pencils just bite and lick at it, all while maintaining eye contact.
- All in the efforts to fluster, make you mad, etc. Everything you do is amusing to him
Ghiaccio
- Reader you are so lucky he likes you because it's one of his major pet peeves
- Ghiaccio doesn't like it, you will get certain privileges revoked because you chew on his things
- Things you're banned from: His pens, pencils, hoodies, erasers, literally anything in his room
- But also it irritates him that he's picked up your biting habit
- It's when he's in deep thought and working, he'll occasionally chew on a pen or bite through the wires on his headphones
Risotto
- I think he tries to mind his business about it, he doesn't outwardly say his thoughts on the biting problem, but it's telling that you have never even held one of his pens
- Risotto doesn't think it's gross, he just likes to have things without bite marks, y'know?
- Literally he only cares if it's his own stuff getting bit, with everything else he believes you and the others can talk it out
- If you're even closer to him, he may find it endearing.
- It's like seeing someone focussing with their tongue poking out, it's just a weirdly cute quirk of yours
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Marrying La Squadra Headcanons
Anon asked: What would married life with la squadrons look like?❤️
Hihi!! Thank you for requesting, I had a lot of fun with these 😅😅 though I'll admit I lingered on the wedding back stories a bit too much lol
Formaggio
- Formaggio never in his life thought he'd be married, he always dreamed of living a bachelor lifestyle
- But y'know...sometimes couples get drunk on special anniversary trips and impulsively get married at a cheap, tourist trap chapel in Vegas
- Formaggio would've loved the stereotypical Elvis impersonator officiamt
- The morning after would've been a bit hectic on his end, but Formaggio is a man who can commit
- He's been thinking about taking the proper steps to marry you anyways, as long as you were fine with the night prior there's no harm done!
- The marriage is a secret for a while, to the team it's as if nothing changed. Your new husband was just as clingy and doting as ever
- I think if weddings are an important part of your culture and something you'd really want to do-over, I think Formaggio isn't opposed to something more formal and traditional
- Though I think he'll always prefer to tell people the story of the shotgun wedding in Vegas, definitely makes him feel cooler
Illuso
- I think Illuso is similar to Formaggio, he never thought to be "tied down" to anyone, but meeting you absolutely changed his mind
- One word to describe Illuso: Bridezilla. He wanted everything to be perfect for the wedding, he might've been the most strict during this era
- I'm sure you had to talk Illuso out of having the wedding in the mirror world because he could control everything. Though after the wedding, he started to come down to his normal self
- The clingiest and softest you've ever seen him was during the honeymoon
- Illuso wouldn't stop calling you his husband/wife/spouse, he wouldn't stop referring to himself with your last name
- Being married you was something he didn't know he needed
- Illuso wears his ring like a badge of honor, he enjoys seeing the silver band that decorates your finger that tells everyone that you belong to him
- Every time he wakes up and you both have to leave for work, he makes sure to kiss your ring before he says goodbye
Prosciutto
- To no one's surprise, Prosciutto easily adjusted to the idea of marriage and the married life
- He can be tender and affectionate, of course he wasn't scared of spending the rest of his life with you.
- Prosciutto would prefer something small, only wanting close family to attend
- Absolutely he would be open to having separate or fusion weddings if you come from a different background. He'd have a lot of enjoyment sharing your traditions with you
- There's so much more confidence within the relationship, Prosciutto smiles when you brag about your husband. A smirk graces his lips when he can hold you by the waist and introduce you as his spouse
- It's very natural for Prosciutto to fall into a house husband role, he loves unwinding in the kitchen and cooking dinners for you
- Even in the honeymoon, he'd scoff at restaurant food and insist he could provide you with something better
- He's an ideal husband if you want to get pampered and recreate the classy romance you see in the movies.
Pesci
- Getting married to you was the scariest and the happiest moment of his life
- Pesci stumbled through the novel that was his vows, when he was able to kiss you he couldn't help himself and pulled you in with anxious excitement
- Even when he proposed, Prosciutto slapped his face and told him to man up before he pulled out the ring
- Like his brother, he prefers something smaller. He wants the moment to be intimate, private
- He cried so much ever since you two married
- Half the honeymoon was spent hugging him and reassuring him that yes, you two really are married, and yes, you really do love him that much
- Marriage or not, he's still just as shy and flustered since you met him. Doesn't matter how tough he tries to act
Melone
- Melone never really thought about marriage before, but it's a welcomed surprise
- I just know that when he got to kiss you during the ceremony, it made everyone instantly uncomfortable/j. He does not care about what others think, he just likes to show you how much he loves
- He absolutely uses the title of husband to his advantage, especially for silly things like pda.
- The honeymoon phase never actually ended for him
- As you two are further in the marriage, the more Melone starts to think about kids
- No secret he's good with them, Babyface has given him more than enough practice
- But having an actual, human baby? Oh it has him all giddy and anxious
- For the first time, you actually see him take a situation seriously. Whether you're giving birth or having a baby through alternative means, he doesn't want to have kids unless you know you're ready too
Ghiaccio
- I don't think marriage ever crossed Ghiaccio's mind growing up. Meeting and falling in love with you opened up so many doors
- It definitely scared him, if you weren't on the other end of the aisle waiting for him, he would've become a runaway groom
- Ghiaccio would so go off and rant about how nothing much has changed ever since you two got married. To him it's just "some name change and extra paper work"
- He'd say that he doesn't feel any different, but that's so far from the truth
- Tease him by calling him your husband, call him by your last name, and watch how his face turns pink and he tries to hide a smile
- It takes the longest for Ghiaccio to settle into married life. I'm not sure it fully registered to him how long you and him have been together
- He never thought he would be loved the way you love him. No matter how hard he pushed people away, you stayed and warmed his heart <33
- That being said never joke about divorce it'd freak him out. He'd cry.
Risotto Nero
- The married life with Risotto is special, as it brings out a completely different side of the capo
- May be an unpopular opinion, but Risotto is right up there with Illuso when it comes to being a Bridezilla
- All he cares about is adhering to your plans. He'll go above and beyond for research to make sure you won't get scammed
- Like yeah. He may have threatened the florist behind your back, but like. What was he supposed to do? The florist was the one trying to pass off rhododendrons as hydrangeas.
- But once the wedding is over, he's exhausted and looking forward to the honeymoon
- Solidifying the marriage made Risotto fully let down his walls around you. He smiles more, he's more physically affectionate, he lets you know that he belongs to you too.
- While you two try to keep chores and tasks equal, swapping out who does what, it's hard to deny that Risotto loves it when it's your job to cook
- He thinks it's adorable when you tie an apron around your waist, roll up your sleeves and get to work.
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