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saltnpepperbunny · 1 year

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Till World’s End- 2: Nine Days Remain

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COVER

Till World’s End is rated Mature. Viewer discretion advised. Content Warnings listed on the Cover.

* * *

Selkie knew the routine.

Margarine the cutiefly fluttered up to her every morning in the mess hall, without fail. It was the price of breakfast: To get food, she had to deal with the bug’s incessant simpering. The constant, subtle tremble in its voice was a surefire way to set Selkie’s blood to a boil. To be fair, there were a small number of positives. It was a good opportunity for Selkie to practice her breathing exercises, her impulse control. And of course, money.

“Good morning, Selkie!” Margarine twittered. The cutiefly fluttered over the seat at the table to Selkie’s right. It had an oran berry in its little insect grip, probably all the breakfast such a tiny thing needed. Margarine set the oran berry down on the table and stuck its pointed nose into the flesh of the fruit, suckling for a few seconds before turning back to Selkie. “How are you doing this morning?”

“I’m fine,” Selkie lied. Stupid little thing. Please go away.

“Fine is fine! Fine is good.” Margarine said with a smile. It suckled its breakfast for another few seconds, then back to bothering Selkie. “I heard Shadow had a bad night. Is he okay?”

Ooh, hm. The conversation was suddenly interesting, if only slightly. Should she answer honestly or not? Answering honestly would betray weakness, the weakness of her unit, of her partner. But despite the advantage of its fairy-type over Shadow’s dark, Margarine was hardly a powerhouse. There was no immediate risk to telling the cutiefly the truth. However, a quick glance around the bustling mess hall reminded Selkie that Margarine was far from the only danger in this Guild. Stronger pokemon existed. Meaner pokemon existed. And Selkie had quite literally no faith in Margarine’s ability to keep a secret. All pokemon gossiped. All pokemon broke trust. Trusting Margarine to keep quiet on Shadow’s weakness was possibly the stupidest thing she could do. But on the other hand, Margarine had already heard about Shadow’s bad night. It wouldn’t be easy to craft a convincing cover-up on the spot like this. It was possible the entire Guild knew already; in fact, it was likely.

A snap of anger drifted through Selkie’s chest. Dammit. All pokemon sucked. Even her partner caused such awful problems for her. They were a team for Arceus’s sake; his weakness was her weakness! And goodness, was his weakness immense. She could still hear his screaming, see his thrashing, the wild panic in his eyes. It wasn’t his fault but dammit if it wasn’t fucking inconvenient—

“Selkie?”

“Shadow is fine,” Selkie lied. “He tends to recover quickly from nightmares. He’ll be at the morning briefing today.”

“I’m glad!” Margarine said with a bright grin. “It’s so worrisome that he gets nightmares so often. Almost every night lately, huh?”

Selkie felt her bones snapping. “Mhm.”

“Maybe he should see the Guild’s thera—”

“By the way, Margarine.” Selkie arranged herself for the next bit. Chin tucked just slightly, shoulders sagged, eyes drooped. She let out a little sigh. “I don’t think you’ve heard because I wouldn’t tell anyone but you. But… my grandmother’s getting worse.”

“Oh no…” Margarine breathed.

“Yeah,” Selkie sighed. She stared wistfully into the distance. “I went to visit her yesterday, b-but she didn’t even recognize me…”

Margarine’s lip quivered. “Oh, Selkie! I’m so sorry to hear that! That’s so hard.”

“It is…” Selkie lied. “I don’t know what to do anymore besides just… prepare for the worst… Her doctor won’t even look at her until I can scrounge together another few thousand poke. It’s so hard to make enough money as a gold-rank team. The Guild takes s-so much of our earnings, Shadow needs a psychiatrist, and I still have to feed my whole family back home…” She dropped her face into her flippers and shuddered. “I’m sorry. It’s just so hard.”

Selkie glanced up to see Margarine’s eyes had become wide and watery. It sure was something, the way emotions bounced from person to person, animal to animal like a contagion. Even Shadow was not immune to the effect, an observation that both surprised Selkie and not. The creatures of the world were locked together in a tango Selkie had never learned the steps to. Thank Arceus. She hated dancing.

She felt the softest tip tap of Margarine patting her with its little insect legs. “I’m sorry, Selkie! Here, let a fellow Guild recruit help you out.”

“I couldn’t possibly accept your generosity again—”

“I insist!”

And there it was. A white-gold coin, worth 2000 poke, produced from the cutiefly’s satchel and extended across the space between them. Selkie arranged her lips in a little smile. “Margarine… You’re so kind. Thank you.”

She took the coin from it gently with her flipper.

It took everything in Selkie not to bite Margarine in half when it flitted up and hugged her around the face. Obnoxious little thing, she hated those buzzing wings so much! “No problem! Some of us are in more fortunate circumstances than others. We gotta help each other out!” Margarine finally backed up and fluttered off from the table. “See you at the morning briefing, Selkie! Best wishes to your grandmother!”

Selkie watched it go, disappearing into the swathing crowd of pokemon in the hall. Finally, a bit of peace. She let the mask fall away, a rippled pool settling into stillness, and looked down at the coin in her flipper. A flick of her claw tossed it upward, and as she snatched it out of the air, she felt a subtle pressure in her chest she figured was maybe happiness. It would be logical, after all, to feel happy right now.

She finished breakfast without further interruption, and Selkie made her way out of the mess hall. She shuffled through the Guild’s corridors towards the main hall where the morning briefing would take place. Arceus, this briefing was going to be boring. It always was! The Guildmaster was likely going to speak on the expedition upcoming in several weeks’ time, but considering the timeline of the situation, there was no reason to give a damn about which teams would be selected for the trip. So, there was literally no point in listening to the Guildmaster drone on and on and on. How fucking agonizing! The boredom was a rot in her brain!

“Selkie!”

Her ears pricked. Selkie looked up to see, well, herself at the opposite side of the corridor. Thank Arceus it was just the two of them or this would’ve been problematic. Another popplio sat facing her, with her same spiky blue fur, same dull pink nose, same splash of white on its chest. The mirror image even had the same leather chains of fangs and canine teeth tied around its flippers, accessories Selkie couldn’t be caught dead without. The only difference between her and the doppelganger were the eyes. Selkie’s were a dull, dark brown, the color of a stagnant pond. Her reflection’s eyes were stormy, electric blue.

This was always a bizarre occurrence, to see herself wandering the tunnels of the underground Guild. She wouldn’t care at all if it weren’t for those eyes. They broadcast emotion like a beam into the sky. Within that stormy blue, she could see winds of glee, downpours of sadness, the blinding crack of anger. To see herself so… exposed… Her chest squeezed.

Selkie bared her teeth just enough to show the tips of her fangs. “Change back, Shadow! There can’t be two of us in one place!”

Her reflection blinked and sputtered. “O-o-oh! Right, sorry!”

The second popplio melted into a haze of gray, flickering like TV static, and then pulled back together into the image of Shadow. Ah. Much better. The dark gray zorua smiled sheepishly at her, eyes melting with love, and Selkie whipped her head away. What a ridiculous little creature. He was so shamelessly loving, so brazenly emotional, his eyes betrayed all. How he could dare to stand before her and not tremble with embarrassment was something Selkie never expected to be able to understand.

It was nice to see him again.

Shadow lifted his hind foot to scratch at the back of his ear. His claws clinked against the single, curved fang stuck through the bottom of his ear like an earring. “I don’t mean to cause problems for you, Selkie. I just—”

“I know. You get nervous,” Selkie shrugged. Shadow was a nervous little creature; aloneness terrified him. Selkie tried to be at his side whenever possible since her mere presence was like a thunder jacket for the zorua. When she couldn’t be, Shadow (with her permission) walked the Guild halls disguised as her, acting as her when he encountered other pokemon. Did Selkie find it a little unsettling? Yeah. Was that a logical reason to stop Shadow from comforting himself in that way? Not really. It was just unfortunate that she couldn’t look his illusion version of herself in the eye without feeling a rattle in her spine.

“I can stop if you mind—”

“I don’t mind,” Selkie affirmed. Because honestly, squeamishness aside, she didn’t. Shadow’s comfort was worth her own lack thereof.

She curved the corners of her lips up into a smile, since being happy would make sense right now. “Look!” She brought out the coin she’d earned at breakfast. “I got money to buy you a drink at the café later.”

Shadow’s eyes lit up like sunbeams. “Wow, thank you! Selkie, you’re the best!” The corners of his eyes crinkled softly, his impossibly fluffy tail swished to and fro. Oh, she hated to admit it, but what a victory that smile was. It was the satisfaction of a child feeding their pet goldeen, the soft, wistful glee of watering the plants in one’s garden. Tending to her own.

With a pressure in her chest that she figured must be happiness, Selkie lifted up a flipper and rubbed Shadow on the head. He giggled as she played with the tuft of fur on his crown. “Come on, Shadow. Let’s go to morning briefing,” she said, passing him by and shuffling down the hall.

“Okay!” He trotted behind her.

The tunnels got busier, packed with more and more pokemon as Selkie and Shadow approached the main hall. As they ducked and dodged through swaths of pokemon far larger than them both, Selkie held her chin high. The smile she’d offered Shadow had since faded; there would be no smiling here, not with the animals about. Show no weakness. She felt the eyes all around them, boring through her fur, trying to pierce the skin to look into her heart. Her eyes were stone. Her face, neutral. They would get nothing out of her. The water was still as ice.

With Selkie in front and Shadow in tow, they pushed their way through the crowd into the main hall. It was the largest space in the underground Guild; the concave ceiling stretched high overhead, splattered with navy blue paint and white speckles to represent the constellations. Selkie liked stars, but she didn’t know these constellations by heart. They weren’t her constellations. She’d learned them all once, she refused to do it again. The room sported an array of wooden bulletin boards covered in yellow fliers. If she concentrated hard, she could read the signs above them: Rescue Jobs, Exploration Jobs, Escort Missions, Service Jobs, Wanted Outlaws. But trying to decipher the pokemon’s footprint runes was a headache. Thank goodness she had Shadow to read things for her now because fuck that, honestly.

The main hall was always bustling with pokemon looking for jobs, returning from outings, or meeting with clients. But the morning briefing drew in crowds that packed the place like a can of fish. Shadow in tow, Selkie pushed her way to the front where the littlest pokemon stood, fixed her gaze on the closed double doors at the head of the hall, and waited.

Within a few moments, they swung open. A hush swept over the crowd like wind over grass, and Selkie felt in the ground the thud thud thuds of Guildmaster Kommo-o’s footsteps. The master of Spectrum Island Rescue Guild was a hulking beast that dwarfed most pokemon, with scars to boot and yellow eyes of gentle intensity. Its voice was deep as the core of the earth. Selkie knew this thing was on a whole other scale of power. That didn’t stop the itch to someday take it in a fight, hopefully before time was up. Oh, to imagine the thrill that would come from gouging out that thing’s throat…

“Good morning, my lovely recruits! It’s time for the morning briefing.” Kommo-o’s voice boomed through the hall. Its yellow eyes were melted caramels. “I know most of you are here for news of the upcoming expedition, but it’ll have to wait! I’m still in the process of finalizing the selections.”

Selkie let out a long huff. Lazy slowpoke.

“But I do have an exciting announcement this morning! Our Guild has a new recruit starting today. Come on out!”

Selkie’s eye twitched. She could not give less of a damn about new recruits. Maybe she’d go track the newbie down, cut its tail off with a pair of garden shears, and leave it on the Guildmaster’s doorstep for wasting her fucking time with this shit. She lifted her head to see what pokemon she’d hopefully be maiming later today, and out through the double doors came…

The instant their eyes met, Selkie’s heart dropped to the bottom of her chest.

It was a litten. Common pokemon in these parts, common species on tropical islands, but this one, uncommon as a star in a daylit sky. Nothing of its appearance betrayed its true nature. It had the same triangular ears, same black fur, same red stripes, same yellow eyes of any ordinary litten. But the instant it set foot in the room, she knew. How she knew, she had no idea, but there was no mistake. Nothing of this ilk could hide from Selkie. The heat of her body drained through the tips of her claws, and Selkie felt her mouth run dry as she remembered, for the first time in a long time, the sensation of fear.

The Guild’s new recruit was a human boy.

“Everyone, this is Lyn. He’ll be working alongside you from now on. Make sure to be welcoming!” As the Guildmaster spoke, the human-turned-litten scanned the crowd of pokemon with half-lidded, disinterested eyes. When Lyn’s gaze fell on Selkie, he blinked and frowned. Shit, had her facial expression betrayed her?! She shot the boy a ferocious snarl, and in response, he dropped his frown and moved on, feline face solidifying once again into mild indifference.

Oh. That was not the reaction she’d expected. Was this stupid creature not afraid? She thought him laughably foolish for a moment before realizing: Was he not afraid because… he’d seen her own fear? Had her face truly betrayed her? Selkie’s body started to tremble. Why was she trembling? She suddenly felt like she was going to cough something up. Why?! What was happening to her?!

“AUGH!” Selkie stormed from the main hall. She paced away down the corridor, her only goal to put as much distance between herself and the others as possible. Goddammit, goddammit! Was this what happened when she let her fear leak to the surface? Was she still just the stupid little girl who cried and cried and couldn’t stop crying? Who felt fear so strong it could devour her whole? No! She was stronger now, she was better, she was safer, she was powerful, or at least she was supposed to be. But now there was an enemy in the Guild and Selkie had immediately betrayed weakness to him. Stupid, stupid humans—

“Selkie!”

“Ack!”

She whipped around, teeth bared. Shadow flinched backwards, and Selkie barked, “For fuck’s sake, Shadow, don’t sneak up on me like that! What the hell’s wrong with you?!”

Shadow didn’t respond for a long moment. The little zorua was cowering. His lips quivered. His eyes started to glisten.

Fucking hell.

Fix it. She had to fix it, immediately, or the pathetic little thing would spiral into a meltdown. She’d made the mistake of not making immediate reparations before. She could not deal with Shadow’s shit right now if he spiraled.

“Shadow, I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to lash out at you.” She shoved down the frustration of not being able to still the tremor in her voice. “You’re not the one who upset me. You just startled me. Are you okay?”

Shadow blinked at her. His lip continued to tremble, and the little thing sniffled. Selkie frowned. She didn’t like to see him like this. She didn’t like to be the reason he was like this. But she had to be patient and let her words do their work. Sometimes, it seemed like Shadow was slow to listen. Selkie could say I love you and watch the words sink into her partner in real time. The way his eyes would widen slightly, like you’d told him something new or that he’d never considered before. His ears would shift, his mouth would go just slightly agape. And slowly, the words would internalize. Selkie watched it happen now, here, in real time. And Shadow sniffled again and wiped the tears away. “Okay…”

Seeming to have collected himself, Shadow picked himself up off the ground and stretched towards her. His stormy eyes glistened with concern. “I was just so worried when you ran out of the briefing! Are you okay?”

Selkie hesitated. How to answer that question? There was very minimal risk in being honest with Shadow. Shadow was a weak little thing; he would die before using her weakness against her. But even still, the fear in her heart muzzled her. To answer honestly, to say no, I’m not okay was a wall even she did not have the power to climb. Weak little popplio. Weak little child. But even so, Shadow needed some of the truth. He was her partner. And trying to obscure this complicated mess would hurt her in the end. The thought of it made her want to cough up her entire stomach, but she was going to need—ugh—help.

“Shadow…” Selkie said. “That litten is a human.”

Shadow’s eyes stretched wide as saucers. His mouth fell open. “Wh-wh-what?”

“I sensed it the instant he walked into the room.”

“But how can that be?! You’re supposed to be the only—”

“Not so loud!” Selkie hissed, and Shadow clamped his jaw shut. She tried to give him a soft look so his sensitive soul wouldn’t take it to heart. She glanced around the corridor to make sure they were alone before continuing. “I don’t know how this can be. I’ve never met another human in this world. Everything was going perfectly! Why now of all times did another human have to…”

Shadow stared at her as she trailed off. “Selkie… Do you think the other human is here to save the world?”

Selkie grimaced. He’d read her mind. She hated when he did that. “… It’s… likely.”

Shadow’s ears pressed back. His tail started to thrash. Lightning lit his stormy eyes. “But he can’t do that! We’re so close! Selkie, we have to stop him somehow. He’s going to ruin everything!”

“I know!” Selkie growled. She felt a rattle in her lungs and forced herself to breathe calmly. In, out, in, out. Relax for fuck’s sake. “I know. I’m going to keep an eye on things. I’ll handle it. Okay, Shadow? I’ll handle it.”

“We’ll handle it.” Shadow took a step closer to her. Rain, thunder, and lightning danced in his eyes. They betrayed all. “Okay, Selkie? We’re… we’re gonna handle it together, okay? You’re not alone in this.” He stepped even closer, and Selkie let him gently lick the base of her ear. “You’re the hero, and I’m your partner. You’re not alone.”

Selkie stared at Shadow for what felt like forever. They were so close in physical space; his little breaths tickled her fur. If he was any other pokemon, Selkie would shove him away. If he was any other pokemon, he wouldn’t be he, but rather it, an animal, a thing. But Shadow wasn’t an animal. He wasn’t a thing.

He was another soul in the dark.

Selkie swallowed her spit. For such a weak, desperate creature, Shadow truly was an impossibility. Pokemon were its. Pokemon were things. And in her own world, humans gave her the same impression. They were resources to be used, obstacles to be dodged, hazards to be wary of. Most understood from birth that other humans were living beings with wants and wishes of their own, who could feel pain. A guidance counselor had to explain the concept to Selkie after she tried to smother another student with her winter jacket in the fourth grade. This was, apparently, the fundamental difference that made other humans “normal” and Selkie “broken.” Normal humans affiliated with each other, for no reason other than its own sake. Normal humans cared for each other, and for each other felt some kind of emotion called “love.” But how was she supposed to care when relationships ended in nothing but drained resources, wasted time, and a feeling of brokenness? She wasn’t dysfunctional. She was right. Humans were worth nothing, pokemon were worth nothing, and nothing—not even being transformed, transported across spacetime, and saddled with an impossible task—could convince Selkie otherwise.

Nothing, that was, until she met a broken, little zorua in a deep, gray cave.

What changed? Selkie still didn’t know. It terrified her not to know. But when she looked at Shadow, something stirred in her icy heart. Like his storm had whipped up her still waters, warm hurricane winds melted the glacier, and out from it came feelings she never thought herself capable of experiencing. Happiness. Liking. Affection, fucking affection. Maybe it was her possessiveness that bound her to Shadow, the feeling of MINE that struck whenever she looked at him. Even normal humans had pets, and those normal humans often preferred their pets remained safe and well-kempt. Maybe it was his obsessive devotion to her. Nothing made Selkie feel powerful like knowing that Shadow was completely within her control. A simple insult could drive the zorua to madness: she’d once told him she wasn’t fond of him just to see what he would do and later found him gouging himself on broken glass. Oh, the idea that she could make that happen, the power she had over Shadow was juicy. Megalomania was a hell of a drug.

But when she saw her little pup slashing his wrists, the result of her words, she felt bad. She’d slapped the broken bottle out of his paws, dragged him to their dorm, wrapped his gushing wounds in linens and moss and whatever she could find because for reasons she couldn’t explain, she didn’t want him to die. What was wrong with her? What was happening? What about Shadow made her smile when she thought of him? What about Shadow made her possessive and protective? What about Shadow made her allow him to inconvenience her, to drain her resources, to be real, the only real thing in all the worlds she’d ever walked?

The hardest part was knowing that deep down, Shadow had power over her, too. He was her partner. He was her exception. He was trustworthy, valuable, unique, qualities Selkie had never expected to find in a human, let alone a pokemon. Shadow had the power to not be an object in her eyes. He had the power to be real. In the only way she could truly manage, Selkie cared about Shadow. And that was scarier than the end of the world.

Was this love?

“I know I’m not alone. I have you,” Selkie said. She pushed her nose into his fur and licked his cheek. It did nothing for her, but she knew he loved it. Then, Selkie pushed past Shadow and stared back down the corridor towards the main hall, where within, the human awaited. It was hard to get invested in anything when she knew it would cease to matter in nine days. It was hard to stave off the boredom, the rot in her brain. But finally, the itch was scratched. Selkie wasn’t afraid. She was powerful, the most powerful creature in this world, and nothing was going to break the promise she and her partner made. Nothing would ruin their happy ending. And if the human Lyn had anything to say about it, he was welcome to meet Selkie’s wrath.

Arceus above. This was going to be interesting.

#pokemon #pokemon fanfic #pmd #pmd fanfic #pmd fanfiction #pokemon fanfiction #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd till world's end #prose #literature #fanfic #popplio #zorua #fanfiction

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saltnpepperbunny · 1 year

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Till World’s End- 1: Ten Days Remain

NEXT: Nine Days Remain >

COVER

Till World’s End is rated Mature. Viewer discretion advised. Content Warnings listed on the Cover.

* * *

Shadow knew the dream.

When sleep came, he walked the labyrinth of his own mind. It was so deep an expanse that Shadow feared if he ventured too far amidst the corridors, he would never find his way out again. The paths were well-worn; he had tread here so many times before, like a prisoner pacing the perimeter of his cell, like a madness had set in. What did he keep coming back for? Shadow was never sure. Part of him snuffled through memories as if poking his nose through the underbrush searching for something, anything that could ease a broken soul. Another part of him knew it was masturbatory, the euphoria of pain lived again and again, the thrill of the inescapability, the catharsis of tear ducts burst. And a last part of him lay chained to grief by an unspoken, unanswered question: How could this have happened to me?

The labyrinth became the Cave. The still, dank air. The plinks of water droplets against stone. Gray walls, gray shadows. The Cave turned everything monochrome. It bled the color from even the brightest pokemon within. Their pigments pooled at their feet and seeped through the stone floor. To be in the Cave was to be colorblind, it snuffed out whatever good was to be found there. What soul could survive in a place without color?

The Cave took shape into a cell, ovular, small, tight. The dampness crawled under his paw pads. Something rattled down Shadow’s spine. Ah, there it was. Fear. Fear like fingers tightening around his throat. Fear like his lungs burning from a lack of breath. Fear like his paws turning to ice. Fear like tuck in, brace yourself, it was coming again, there was nothing that would stop it. Fear like resigning. Fear like giving in. Fear like giving up.

Fear like resigning as he heard the creeeeaaaaak of the metal door swinging steadily open. Fear like giving in as leathery talons peeled through his fur and grabbed tight into his skin. Fear like giving up as Shadow did nothing. Throat clenched too tight to scream. Muscles so stiff with bracing that he couldn’t move except to tremble. Mind too far gone to cry. It slid down his spine into the bottom of his chest, hiding there from the world, from him. There was nothing, nothing he could do—

BAM!

Pain bloomed in his back like red ink rising into water.

BAM!

Tears squeezed out his eyelids, but he couldn’t cry.

BAM!

Please stop, please stop, please stop!

Again and again and again. The world was excruciation. All he could do was suck in wisps of breath through his nostrils, shake, and hold on. Hold on to what, it didn’t matter, just hold on. Hold on until she got here. Where was she? Where was she?! Where was she?!

“SHADOW!”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

There it was, his voice! His eyelids flung open, and Shadow threw his head back as the scream burst from his maw. Fear, ejected as sound, and with it the floodgates opened. Shadow kept screaming, fumbling in the dark, legs kicking out every which way. His back split with pain. “Get off! Don’t touch me! GET AWAY FROM ME!”

Flick!

It was like a sunbeam cutting through the murk. The darkness that had sunk into the room like a fog, with the flick of a light switch, dissipated in an instant. Color came to his eyes, and through heaving lungs, Shadow took in the familiar space of his dorm: rough, red walls of the underground space, covered here and there with fluffy, green moss and pinches of lichen, all lit in the warm, yellow glow of the incandescent bulb in the ceiling’s center. Dark wooden shelves sported gold badges, trophies, and medals. Atop a red, circular throw rug on the floor sat two beds of moss and yellow straw, one of which Shadow was clutching onto for dear life. The second nest was empty. Shadow’s gaze trailed up towards the light switch by the door, where he expected to find the pokemon who should have been within it. Sure enough, standing by the switch and flicking her flippered tail was…

“Selkie…” Shadow drank in the sight of the scruffy, dark blue popplio.

For a moment, the sight of her melted the thorn of fear lodged in his heart. Her eyes were still water. Her expression, almost totally neutral. Almost. But Shadow could see the slightest twitch in her eye, the flicking of her tail, and anxiety crawled through the space between his lungs and his heart. His gaze flicked to the round window nearby, which revealed nothing but pitch black. The lightbulb had beaten back the darkness, but nightfall still swamped the world outside the cozy, little space they shared.

He'd had a nightmare.

Shadow clenched his teeth. “Selkie, I—”

BANG BANG BANG!

Shadow jumped two feet into the air at the sudden banging on door, and an exasperated voice cut through the wood into their shared space: “HEY, PSYCHOS! SHUT THE HELL UP! Some pokemon are trying to sleep!” Then, the thud, thud, thud of retreating footsteps, and silence.

Selkie’s lip screwed up, and her eyelid twitched. “Knew that was gonna happen,” she muttered. “How irritating.”

Shadow swallowed a quivering whimper. “I-I’m sorry. I just h-had a d-dream. I didn’t mean to cause trouble for you, Selkie, I was just—”

“Stop.”

He shut up.

Selkie stared hard at the door. There was a ripple in her still-water eyes. They were the color of murky water, betraying nothing beneath the surface, at least to the everyday passerby. But Shadow could see so much in those eyes. Because even still water could ripple. He could sense it like the softest waves lapping on the shore of his own mind: the irritation, the anger, the ember. Selkie didn’t move for the longest time, gaze fixed on the door where any pokemon could intrude on their safety, their quiet, their peace. She raised a flipper towards the bronze knob, the tips of her white claws twitching. But then, she turned her pink nose away from the door with a huff.

“I’m sorry—”

“Don’t.”

Her still-water eyes rose slowly to meet Shadow’s. She stared at him for an extended moment, and then Selkie let out an exhale and shuffled towards him. Shadow waited patiently as the popplio crawled past her own bed and slowly, gently lighted herself down into his nest with him.

The touch of her flipper wrapping around his body set Shadow’s stormy heart aflame.

As soon as she settled in, Shadow buried his face into her blue. Nestled under her collar, he inhaled deeply. Even the smell of her fur was cold, still, like crystal. Shadow drank it in, he drank in Selkie and let her spirit fill him to the brim. Like a hatchling suckling his mother’s milk. Like an addict shooting up. Selkie was his drug, wasn’t she? She was the calm that could quell the storm, the anchor in the madness. Perfect, where he was nothing. But in moments like these, when their bodies melted into one and Shadow could feel the warmth of her blood, the soft beating of her heart, the stirring of air in her lungs, he became something that one could constitute as alive. Was this love?

“Another dream, yeah?” Selkie murmured to him.

“Mhm.”

“You’ve been getting so many.”

“I try not to.”

“I don’t mind.”

“I know that’s a lie.”

Selkie was quiet for a moment, just breathing. In, out. In, out. A little sigh. “It causes problems. But it’s not your fault.” Shadow felt a tremble in her fur, and he glanced up to see the slight curling of her lips. “It’s the damned animals.”

Selkie scraped her white claws against the side of the bed. Shadow could guess what fantasies must be running through her head, but he didn’t mind. Selkie would never hurt him. Trying to block out the scraping, he nestled deeper into her fur and breathed her in. The dream didn’t matter anymore. He was out of his own head. She was here. She was here.

“Hey, Selkie?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.”

“… I love you, too, Shadow.”

And that was all he needed to hear. His heart skipped three beats. Warmth oozed from his heart and filled his chest with a storm of fire, so hot his ribs glowed molten. Oh, what a blessing she was. His perfect pokemon, his favorite pokemon, the only pokemon that mattered. The light that broke through the darkness, the stillness to his storm. Outside held the dark, the black, the storm, the intruders. In here, it was just him and Selkie in the yellow glow. There were no other pokemon. No monsters, no intruders, no night. The storm was a storm they could contain together. Just Shadow and Selkie, in perfect harmony. Nothing else needed to exist.

“You just have to make it ten more days, y’know?”

Shadow’s ear flicked at Selkie’s voice. He glanced up to see her staring down at him. Still water.

“Yeah… Ten more days…”

“No more suffering.”

“No more suffering…”

“And until that day comes…” Selkie bent down, licked him gently behind the ear, and murmured in a voice that betrayed no emotion, “I’ll destroy anything that tries to bring you harm.”

In that moment, in the yellow glow of their safest space, Shadow felt protected. Because Selkie lied more often than not, and Shadow knew it every time, but this was no lie. This was the one thing she would never lie about. She was incredible. She was the goddess. She was the savior. The hero. And he, her partner, her shadow. Her Shadow. That was all he was, and that was all he needed to be, till world’s end.

Shadow whispered, “I would die for you.”

Selkie whispered back, “I know.”

#pokemon #pokemon fanfic #pmd #pmd fanfic #pmd fanfiction #pokemon fanfiction #pokemon mystery dungeon #zorua #popplio #pmd till world's end #prose #literature #fanfic #fanfiction

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saltnpepperbunny · 11 months

Text

Till World’s End- Epilogue

PREVIOUS: One Day Remains >

COVER

Till World’s End is rated Mature. Viewer discretion advised. Content Warnings listed on the Cover.

* * *

Mom always said there’d be a light at the end of the tunnel.

Most often, she was mean. Hell, she could be cruel. Shadow would never forget how his fear rose with the moon when Mom came home from work and the reek of alcohol would billow through the house. After dark, he kept to his bedroom. He’d bang his wooden dolls together in imaginary combat and listen to her wail and slur her ex-boyfriend’s name. His heart would break. Then the reek would intensify, and Shadow would listen to Mom mutter about her child’s monstrosity.

Shadow, oh Shadow, why’d you have to be born?

Sometimes, she would come into his bedroom. This was an occurrence to be feared. But sometimes, instead of screaming at him or crying in his lap, Mom would slide in through the door and give the softest smile. She’d come close and caress his face. Tell him she was sorry. That’s what was hard about Mom: It was hard not to understand. Shadow hated her but could not blind himself from her personhood. She was weak and fragile, and he wished he could’ve protected her from the world that turned her insane. Sometimes, they would go for walks, and Mom would give him advice. She’d say, “No matter how dark things can be, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.”

Back then, Shadow didn’t know what she meant. Too young for metaphors. When he aged, died and revived, and came to experience more of the world, Shadow thought he now understood her meaning. It referred to the fabled bright light that pokemon see when they die. No matter the darkness of the world, someday he too would enter the light. And then nothing would ever hurt him again. This was what Shadow had seen in Selkie’s promised happy ending. To step into the light, not even alone but with his savior at his side, sounded too good to be true.

But Shadow now saw the error in his childish stupidity. Oh, how fear drove even the fearless to such lengths. His worst nightmare had come to pass: It really was all too good to be true. Selkie, the team, their happy ending, everything. But somehow, on the other side of the labyrinth, he found the inevitable epiphany not terrifying, but liberating. Like his soul had spread white wings.

Shadow knew a thing or two about how to save the world.

The reason he knew these things was, of course, because of Selkie. After all, before becoming his partner instead, she had been this world’s hero. Shadow remembered those late nights spent curled up in their Guild dorm, talking for hours. Shadow often spent those hours venting or lamenting about the past, and Selkie preferred to listen, but sometimes he could get her to talk. The longer they spent together, the more secrets she trusted him with. She usually spoke of her own past and the humans she hated. But sometimes, she talked about the end of the world. Before abandoning the quest, Selkie hadn’t figured out everything about the coming end and how to stop it. But she did know a few key details.

The entity that would destroy their world was an ancient being whose name translated into Light that Takes. It was not a pokemon but a formless, reincarnating being that embodied the earth’s elements: ice, darkness, now light. According to Selkie, Light that Takes was sentient. It could feel, think, and sought to ruin the world over and over for a personal reason. That’s what was hard about those who sought to destroy the world: It was hard not to understand. Been there.

As Shadow stood upon the clifftop, looking into the immense light spinning above the ocean like a daylit star come to earth, staring into the storm of boulders, buildings, and debris pulled up into the beacon, his heart cracked in his chest. Oh, Light that Takes, he was sorry. Sorry to become the taker in turn, sorry to steal away this chance at curing the rot. Shadow knew what it meant, he understood the gravity of Light that Takes’ choice made again and again. But unfortunately, he and it had ended up on opposite sides.

Unfortunately for Light that Takes, Shadow had a girl to save. And no force in this world nor any other would stand between him and that purpose.

Shadow crouched. His legs tensed, braced. And with a springing leap, Shadow sailed off the clifftop and flew across the gap onto the nearest floating boulder. Towards Light that Takes they were pulled, into the storm of gargantuan debris, and the wind buffeted Shadow’s fur. Atop the stone, he sailed into the battle.

There were several different beings that could take on Light that Takes, especially if brought together. A legendary pokemon, powerful enough, could face it alone. A legendary pokemon and a human together were the strongest of combinations for facing the entity. But if a legendary could not be procured, a human could still stand against Light that Takes. This was why the humans were called. Light that Takes could not be defeated by an ordinary pokemon alone.

But the guests of honor hadn’t shown. No legendary pokemon appeared to face Light that Takes, and the sole remaining human hero would be a no-show. How ironic that Shadow had rooted for the world’s destruction the hardest, lay awake dreaming of it, and now he was the only one to show up to the party! Hilarious.

Shadow sighed. His chances were near hopeless, he was aware. He was no legend, no human, just a zorua with a fang in his ear. But he was the only one here. He was the sole barrier between his human and the being which would end her. No matter how easily he could be knocked aside, Shadow wasn’t going anywhere. Into the open sky he sailed.

As his boulder approached the storm of light spinning in the sky, Shadow dug his claws into the rock and hung on tight. It was no smooth journey; the boulder swayed and dipped from the force of Light that Takes’ pulling. The sensation reminded him of a journey across the sea.

But as he sailed closer to Light that Takes, the boulder beneath him suddenly lurched. Shadow scrambled against the stone to avoid being thrown off, and he gasped as a crack gouged through the rock beneath his belly. Fuck, he wasn’t gonna have a ride for much longer! Shadow jumped up as the boulder wrenched in two from the sheer force of Light that Takes’ pull. As it splintered and split beneath him, Shadow kicked off and made a flailing jump across the sky onto the nearest rock big enough to hold him.

He cleared the gap and latched onto the next boulder with his claws, scrabbling his hindlegs desperately to secure his hold. He crouched low to keep his balance and lifted his head to look into Light that Takes as they soared closer. It was a hurricane of swirling brilliance, a tornado of bright white. Light it Takes itself was quiet, as light made no sound, but the storm of destruction in its orbit was not. Shadow’s ears filled with the cacophony of boulders peeled apart like tangerines, houses and buildings crushed into rubble, rumbling rivers of water drawn up from the ocean. The crash and boom of massive rubble and debris crashing against each other in the air stung his eardrums. If something big knocked against him in the sky, it was over. It would be a lie to say Shadow wasn’t scared. But for some reason, by some strange power excavated inside him, anxiety did not drown him. His fear today was a hatchling he could hold, and with it tucked in arm, he would save the world or die trying.

“SHADOW!”

What? It couldn’t be! It was just a voice in his head, it must have been! Shadow whipped around in the direction of the call, and his jaw dropped. It was Selkie, riding towards him across the sky on an uprooted pine tree! She clutched onto the wood with her flippers and shot Shadow a furious snarl. His heart dripped at the sight of that beautiful scowl— Wait no, focus, Shadow! She shouldn’t be here!

“Selkie, go back! It’s too dangerous!”

“SHUT UP!” Selkie’s voice boomed across the gap, but it was still near impossible to make out her words amidst the storm’s roaring. “SHADOW, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU DOING?! THAT’S THE THING THAT’S GONNA END THE WORLD, YOU MORON!”

“I KNOW, SELKIE! THAT’S KINDA THE IDEA!” Shadow shouted back.

“I KNOW YOU’RE SUICIDAL, BUT THIS IS IDIOTIC EVEN FOR YOU!” Selkie roared. She gasped and clutched on tighter as her pine tree lurched under her. “SHADOW, JUST COME BACK TO LAND! YOU’RE GONNA HURT YOURSELF!”

“NO!”

“SHADOW, FOR FUCK’S SAKE—”

“NOT UNTIL I SAVE YOU! WHOA—” Shadow yelped as his boulder suddenly smashed against the excised wall of a house. It crumbled into chunks beneath him, and Shadow heard Selkie cry his name as he quickly kicked off against the remaining rock and jumped atop the wall. He grit his teeth and stared into the storm. “Selkie, what do I have to do to defeat the Light? Will regular attacks work?”

“SHADOW, THIS IS FUCKING MADNESS!” Selkie made a sailing leap from her tree onto a closer hunk of dirt and stone. “We’re not prepared to save the world! We needed a legendary pokemon, and there were scrolls and magic rites… YOU CAN’T JUST BEAT IT UP UNTIL IT DIES!”

“WELL, I’M GONNA HAVE TO FUCKING TRY!” Shadow shouted.

The wind was howling. Selkie jumped closer again onto a chunk of uprooted billboard. She grimaced in desperation. “Shadow! I don’t fucking get you! You wanted this, I wanted to give you this! Why now, at the last possible minute? WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO SAVE THE WORLD?!”

“I’M NOT!” Shadow’s voice boomed. “I’m not trying save the world, I don’t give a fuck about the world! Selkie, I’m trying to save YOU!”

Selkie paused. Those still water pools of her eyes swam with confusion. “… I NEVER ASKED TO BE SAVED!”

“THANKS, BUT I WASN’T LOOKING FOR PERMISSION!” said Shadow. “Because I know you’d never grant it. You think you’re a monster. You think you don’t deserve to be saved! But I KNOW YOU’RE WRONG!”

“HOW? How could you possibly know?!” Selkie’s voice came out strangled as she clutched on. “Even I know the truth! I know I’m the villain! Your obsession has blinded you from the TRUTH! The world is not worth saving, ESPECIALLY not for me! Just come the fuck back to land!”

“NO! I DON’T CARE! I CAN’T BEAR TO LOSE YOU, SELKIE!” Shadow screamed.

And that was the truth of it, really. It was all so simple in the end. Shadow couldn’t stand to watch the world end because he couldn’t stand to say goodbye to his closest friend. He always thought he would be ready when the day came to step into the light together. But he wasn’t ready for this to end. He wasn’t ready to sleep alone. Selkie saved him. Selkie gave him this chance. If he couldn’t use it to save her in return, then how dare he call himself her partner?

Selkie growled in frustration. She grit her teeth and jumped across onto Shadow’s chunk of debris, caught herself just in time not to slide too far. Crouched low, she looked deep into Shadow’s eyes, and her brows furrowed in desperation. “Shadow, listen to me. If you save the world, there is no going back! They’ll live, all of them, all the pokemon who ever hurt you! Our pain won’t end here, it will live on with us! Are you really ready to suffer indefinitely?” When Shadow didn’t answer right away, she said, “I can’t stand for harm to come to you, Shadow. I can’t bear to lose you either, but…”

Shadow let out a breath. He smiled soft. “I know. Thank you. You’re just trying to save us, Selkie. But that’s how I know I won’t suffer!” He reached forward and laid his paws atop her flippers. “I would rather live a thousand painful tomorrows than say goodbye to you today. You saved me, Selkie. Now let me save you.”

Selkie gasped. Her lips quivered. And her eyes softened. Then she scowled as her attention turned towards the storm. Light that Takes reflected bright in the mirror of her brown eyes. It illuminated her face. “If I can’t protect you from this thing, what the hell kind of partner am I?” Selkie flexed her claws and flashed a sharp-toothed grin. “We’ve barely got a shot, but we’re just gonna have to try.”

Shadow’s jaw dropped. “Selkie!”

“A pokemon alone has no chance of beating Light that Takes. But a human and pokemon together might be a different story! It’s supposed to be a legendary, but we’ll have to do.” The wind buffeted Selkie’s blue fur. “We have to get closer. Get your biggest attacks ready! Let’s SHOW THIS FUCKING THING WHO’S BOSS!”

Hollering a war cry, Selkie made a flying leap onto a boulder pivoting closer to the Light. She nearly jumped too far and snatched out with her claws to grab it just in time, then swung her body up onto the rock. “FUCK YOU, LIGHT THAT TAKES!” With her last word, a blast of water launched from her mouth directly into its heart.

Shadow jumped to his feet. No way! No fucking way! She was in! Selkie was at his side! Feeling the world swell in his chest, Shadow leaped across the air onto as close a boulder as he could reach, dark magic readying at his paws. He had no idea how he was meant to aim at a formless storm of light, but Selkie knew best and was already on the attack. He’d just have to follow her lead! He leaped across the field of floating rocks towards Light that Takes, darting this way and that as illusion magic cloaked his form. Once he was close enough, he lifted his paws and blasted Light that Takes with feint attack.

Shadow gasped as it lurched under the force of the feint attack. No way! He’d expected his attack to pass straight through Light that Takes, but his attack hit something solid at its core. The air buffeted his fur as Selkie’s disarming voice shot past him, and as the attack connected, Shadow felt Light that Takes shudder. It shuddered!

The epiphany that Light that Takes was not a formless, invulnerable presence but rather a solid body they could strike changed everything. He hadn’t been stupid, the quest wasn’t doomed to fail from the start! They had a chance, a real chance to pull this off. They didn’t have to die today! They didn’t have to say goodbye! They could live! They could LIVE!

It was no easy battle. As Selkie and Shadow blasted Light that Takes with water and dark magic, a low, agonized howl like a thunderous wind emanated from the entity’s solid core. Its trailing limbs of light swirled around it, and Selkie barked out, “It’s going to attack! Watch out!” Shadow braced himself as Light that Takes drew in on itself, and out from the center exploded a blasting force of light that knocked into Shadow like a wall. He cried out and gripped onto the boulder tight with his claws. He didn’t fall.

Selkie was already back in the fight. She slid through the air across boulders and debris as water swirled around her in aqua jet. Light that Takes flailed and swiped at her with long tendrils of yellow light, but she dipped and dodged with ease. From her mouth erupted disarming voice, stunning Light that Takes as it cried like a dying belltower, and then Selkie slammed against its core like a bullet of water. Light that Takes screamed.

Shadow jumped up again. He watched Selkie square off against the world-ending horror as he ran back into the battle. The bright light illuminated against her shining wet fur. Up there, locked in battle, she appeared like an angel of water and light. Selkie was amazing, and Selkie was special, and Shadow was obsessed with her. But she was no angel, no goddess, no queen. The girl he loved was just like him: Someone left to fall through the cracks. Someone who struggled with hope, despair, and pain and hated herself enough to die. But just like him, she was here, fighting for the life of her partner. The understanding that Selkie wanted him to live more than she wanted the world she hated to die brought Shadow’s heart to swell. He could hear the symphony. Shadow would fight to the death for her!

As he attacked Light that Takes with feint attack, as its pained shrieks filled the sky, Shadow saw once again that crack in the heavens, glimpsed so long ago when Selkie carried him across the sea. In through the rift spilled impossible light. He saw everything in that moment.

They really were so alike, weren’t they? Selkie and Shadow. So distinctly opposite: Human and pokemon, hero and partner, stillness and storm. Yet Shadow now saw so clearly the likeness that bound them through thick and thin. They were children of the worlds’ cruelty, offspring of a universal indifference. Selkie believed this was justification for her death, but Shadow kept the truth for her. He always thought himself different, a being of such exceptional monstrosity that he did not deserve to live. But maybe she kept the truth for him, too, manifested in her battle against the end. If he and Selkie were born from the same mother, then how could she deserve to live if he did not?

The meaningful difference between them did not exist. In that moment, Shadow finally understood that he too deserved to live. He wanted to see tomorrow.

It was going to be hard. Messy was an understatement. Shadow knew the problems they’d face tomorrow morning would feel insurmountable. He’d expected to only survive some years past choosing not to save the world; now, he had decades to look forward to. And he was scared. The looming future was daunting, the understanding that every day he would still battle pain, emotional storms, and Selkie’s stillness. She would still lie and steal, he would still cling and cry, and he expected that some days, they would regret saving the world. It would still hurt them, torment them, it would never repay the debt owed for its rescue. Shadow had no idea how to untangle the mess of his own mind, or if he would ever see the day that he was “better.”

But tomorrow, the sun would rise. Tomorrow, he and Selkie would find something to eat. Tomorrow, they would lick their wounds, find fresh water to drink, and talk about what to do next. Next. The idea of next set Shadow’s heart racing with excitement. He couldn’t help but smile wide. As he readied a final blast of feint attack and Selkie at his side prepared a water gun, their eyes met across the battlefield. Selkie’s face was cut up from flying debris and burned from light, but a fire burned in those deep, still pools.

“You’re really hot when you save the world!” Shadow called to her.

“I know,” Selkie deadpanned. Her eyes softened.

“I love you, Selkie.”

“I love you, too, Shadow.”

And that was all he needed to hear. Shadow’s heart skipped three beats, and as human and pokemon blasted Light that Takes with their final attacks, the entire world jolted. The eldritch entity screamed. It curled in on itself and exploded outward, and the orbiting storm of debris rocketed off as if smacked away by a great gust. The floor vanished under Shadow’s paws. His body flung through the air. Was he falling? Was he flying? He couldn’t tell.

Shadow had no idea where he was going to land. But he looked into the sky and saw only light, and in that moment bursting with potential, it didn’t seem to matter what came next.

* * *

Hey y'all, thank you so much for reading Till World's End. The story is now complete. I understand that this was an incredibly unorthodox, controversial, and perhaps (for some of you) distasteful story. But thank you for sticking with it to the end and giving this weird little romp a chance!

It has always been my dream to release a book to the public and share it with readers. Till World's End is the first book I've written and completed since 2017. I am so, so happy that my dream has finally come true. As always, your patronage, support, and readership are greatly appreciated. You guys are the real ones, truly. Thanks again, and see you next time!

#pokemon #pokemon fanfic #pmd #pmd fanfic #pmd fanfiction #pokemon fanfiction #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd till world's end #prose #literature #fanfic #popplio #zorua #fanfiction

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saltnpepperbunny · 11 months

Text

Till World’s End- 10: One Day Remains

PREVIOUS: Two Days Remain > NEXT: Epilogue >

COVER

Till World’s End is rated Mature. Viewer discretion advised. Content Warnings listed on the Cover.

* * *

When Selkie fell asleep last night, she felt so physically awful that she hoped to knock out and sleep through the end of the world. So, when the sound of someone yapping her name roused her, she was sorely disappointed.

“Selkie! Selkie, wake up! Selkie!”

“Ngh…?” Selkie hoisted her head out from the puddle of drool she’d been using as a pillow. Rubbed the crust out of her eyes with her flipper. Who the absolute hell was bothering her this early in the morning? It’s not like she had school anymore… Wait, no, the morning briefing wasn’t for a few more… Gods, hang on, where the hell was she again? Opening her eyes slowly to adjust to the bright sunlight bouncing off the ocean, Selkie greeted the final morning.

One day. Just one more goddamn day.

“Oh, thank goodness! You’re finally awake!”

Selkie tilted her head to her right, following the direction of the voice she knew anywhere. Shadow stood hovering over her, butting his wet nose uncomfortably close. Selkie looked into his electric blue eyes and glimpsed the familiar storm, but something about those wet, fiery eyes made Selkie’s heart jump. She quickly turned away, fixed her gaze on his chest. The way Shadow’s brows furrowed in concern made her want to clock him.

“Oh, good, you’re back,” Selkie spat.

“Of course I’m back…” Shadow huffed. Selkie noticed he was panting. “I couldn’t find you at the spot where we split up. I-I-I was worried! I was looking all over the place for you, Selkie, why are you sleeping here? It’s not safe!”

“What?”

Looking around, Selkie realized she fell asleep low on the beach amongst the rocks, where she’d lost herself in her memories. She glanced behind her where the dead buneary had lay, but the corpse had disappeared. Must’ve gotten dragged out with the tide. Her fur was damp and encrusted with salt, her head pounded, her throat was dry. Her empty stomach clenched and crunched with pain. It was somehow worse than waking up hungover. How long had she been asleep here for?

“I sleep wherever I please,” Selkie muttered.

“You can’t do that. You’re freezing!” Shadow sniffed her all over, and Selkie’s fur stood up on end. “Were you sleeping here all night? Selkie, come on, we need to get you somewhere dry—”

SMACK!

With a swift strike of her flipper, Selkie shoved Shadow away. He stumbled back and nearly tripped over himself as an incoming wave slid under his paws. Caught himself just in time, and Shadow gave Selkie that usual look of pained betrayal, but there was something a little different about it this time. Something starkly less… childish.

Shadow gulped. “Selkie, I want you to—”

“YOU DO NOT ORDER ME!” Shadow clamped his jaw shut and flinched back from Selkie’s roar. One of the arteries in her frozen heart snapped open and hemorrhaged warm, sickly anger. “I’LL SLEEP WHEREVER THE FUCK I WANT! WHY THE HELL DID YOU EVEN COME BACK?!”

“I came back because we’re a team!” Shadow whimpered. His tail swished in building agitation. “W-we’re Team Tempest!”

It took everything in her not to start blasting Shadow with water gun. “No! Fuck you, don’t you pull that shit on me!” Selkie barked. Her head was splitting open. Her dry throat burned from shouting. “After everything I’ve done, you still just wanna see the worst in me! I thought you were different, but you’re just like the rest of them! The team is over, you hear me? IT’S OVER!”

Shadow stopped. He blinked. Selkie watched the words sink in through his skin to his brain and heart. His lip quivered. “Selkie, I… I went back to the Cave.”

“And what did you find there?” Selkie glowered at him. “The skeletons of your captors, or the bodies of my victims? They’re still down there, aren’t they? Exactly where we left them.”

“Th-they are—”

“Except that’s fine, isn’t it?! According to you, they deserved to die! They tortured you, of course they did!” The anger snapped white in Selkie, and she spun around to slap her flippered tail against a nearby rock. Something cracked. “But Lyn the human was somehow an EXCEPTION?! You make no fucking sense!”

“Selkie, Lyn’s not what I’m here for—”

“So what? What are you here for?!” Selkie started to storm towards him, and Shadow folded his ears and backed towards the surf. “Come to poke the ursaring? Prod the monster?!”

“No—”

“Hoping I’d lie to you? Manipulate you?! Seems to be what I’m good for!”

Shadow growled, “That’s not—”

“So then, WHAT!? What are you here for?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!”

“I CAME BACK BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”

“NO, YOU DON’T!”

Her thunderous roar stunned Shadow silent. Selkie watched his eyes widen and brows furrow in confusion. His tail swished. “Selkie, what are you talking about? You know I love you! I’ve told you so many times—”

“Do you think your sick infatuation is what love is meant to look like?!” Selkie snarled. She stormed closer to Shadow, felt the rush as she watched him cower in fear. “Do you think any ordinary person tells his partner he would die for her? Do you think it’s normal to stalk her and watch her sleep? You think it’s normal to assume you’ve been abandoned and throw a goddamn fit every time I leave the Guild without you? THAT IS NOT LOVE!” Selkie lowered her head to glare directly into Shadow’s eyes, nose to nose. “You’re just obsessed with me.”

Shadow’s lip quivered. His eyes glistened. “That’s not true—”

“Yes, it is,” Selkie hissed. “Every time we have ever told each other I love you was a lie. It was all a lie, you hear me?! A LIE!” Shadow winced from her deafening roar. “We’re toddlers playing pretend! You cannot love, and I cannot love, because we’re FUCKING BROKEN! The universe TOYED with us and TWISTED us, and this is the result! WE’RE FREAKS!” With her last word, Selkie slapped her tail against the sand, and Shadow yelped as geysers burst from the ground around them.

As bursting saltwater rained on the two pokemon in the surf, Selkie glared down at Shadow’s trembling form. She drank in the sight like a cup of hot tea. Everything would be okay so long as she made him fear her.

“Let’s end the fucking charade already.”

Finally, Selkie lifted her head high and looked away from Shadow. Her gaze drifted past the rocks floating around them. Some were small as pebbles, some large as boulders, spinning adrift through the air. The sky was sickly bright. “Now, go on. Run off and cry. Break a bottle and cut yourself. Throw your tantrum. Show me just how fragile you are. I know to you, my words cut deeper than thorns.”

She did not look at Shadow but felt him trembling beneath her. Selkie rolled her eyes. He started to rise, and Selkie waited for him to bolt off into the jungle again. So fucking predictable. At the end of the day, Shadow sure was boring.

But Shadow didn’t move. After giving it a bit longer to avoid speaking too soon, Selkie scoffed. “What? Did I upset you so much you forgot how to run?” As she spoke, she pivoted her head to face Shadow directly, but when they met eyes, Selkie fell silent. Their gazes caught each other like hooks. The storm swirled in Shadow’s watering, glaring eyes, and in them Selkie sensed neither anguish nor collapse, but a force with the power to unite the storm under its will. Why did Shadow look so ferocious?

Eyes brimming with tears, Shadow boomed, “Do NOT talk to me like that!”

Selkie sputtered. “H-huh?”

“Stop it, just stop talking to me like that! I hate when you get mean!” Selkie couldn’t understand. Shadow was crying and sniffling but somehow shouting back at her? What was going on?! “Don’t you DARE talk like you’re broken! Don’t you DARE talk like you can’t love! IT WAS NEVER A LIE!”

“Yes, it was! I was just saying it cause I knew you liked it! I’ve never felt anything behind it, never!”

“I DON’T CARE!” Shadow shoved his nose at her, and Selkie backed up. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I am just obsessed with you! I worship you, I dream about you, I can never get you out of my head, I’d trade my life for yours, and I KNOW that’s not normal! I have NEVER been normal! But just because I’m not normal doesn’t mean I don’t know how you make me feel!

“My whole life, I have ALWAYS been treated like I’m broken! My mom thought I was a monster, so she sold me! The Rogue tortured me! The pokemon at the Guild treat me like a traumatized freak who can’t tell left from right, let alone accurately judge his own teammate! I went through hell and came back, and pokemon just see the scars. They never see me! But you’re different!”

Selkie stood dumbfounded as Shadow continued to scream. Tears streamed down his cheeks. “You’re not just any other pokemon or any other human. You understand! You don’t judge me for wanting to die because you want it, too! You don’t treat me like shit when I act like a freak cause you know the world made me that way! You’ve suffered, just like me, and it turned you cold and mean. You can’t feel anything behind it, but you still say I love you back.

He pressed closer to her. She stopped backing up. “Do you think that after all these years, I don’t know you? I know you lie. I know you steal. I know you don’t really feel anything but rage. But Selkie, you are the only person in all the worlds who has ever seen me. Maybe you don’t love me, but you are the only one who has ever tried. A-a-a-and that…” Shadow’s words collapsed into sobs. “T-t-that means m-more to me… than you could e-ever know…”

Silence settled on the beach. Selkie stared at Shadow in silent shock as he lowered his head and let his tears fall into the waves lapping at their feet. When he nudged towards her, she didn’t move. When Shadow nuzzled her face and licked the side of her muzzle, she was still. Frozen, as Shadow whispered to her, “I know you think it’s not real, Selkie. My obsession is all I have to offer; I can’t give you something better, and I’m sorry. But… I love you.”

Selkie let the words sink in. Like a warm breath on her icy heart, novel yet so familiar. Shadow seemed to glow in the light of a new dawn. She still felt the same towards him: That possessiveness, the urge to protect and shelter from harm what belonged to her. She remembered the rush of the power she held over him. But as if from the thawing soil in the spring, something new bloomed inside her. Something unrecognizable.

Selkie realized her heartrate was rising. Her breathing quickened, and her body itched to bolt. She felt small, like Dad was sneaking up on her, he couldn’t be! She whipped her head around to make sure. Beach rocks floated behind her, and Selkie lifted her chin to follow the trail of pebbles into the sky. More was rising along with them: Grains of sand and sticks and twigs, loose leaves and old bleached bones. The earth itself was stirring. Selkie suddenly felt sick.

“It’s too late,” Selkie muttered to him. “It’s too late to rise. This world will never see another morning. We set with the sun.” Why did she feel so queasy? What was this pressure in her chest?

Shadow’s mouth trembled. He chewed his cheek.

“It’s too late for us. No matter what is between us, it’s powerless against the world! It’s all going to end!” She was suddenly back in her childhood bedroom, the door was locked and there was no way out. Selkie clutched at her pounding head. Somewhere, a dead buneary stared into her soul. “There’s no way to resist. I killed the hero!”

“You’re the only hero I’ve ever needed, Selkie.”

Selkie couldn’t breathe. “But I’m not a hero, and you know it! I have steered this world to its ruin. I wanted this, and I still do, I don’t give a shit, so what is going on? Why do I feel this way?!”

“H-hey, it’s okay.” Shadow nosed towards her but made no contact. “C-c-can I touch you? Is that okay?”

For some reason, Selkie said, “Yes.” So, Shadow nudged closer, touched her cheek with his nose, and they breathed together. Stillness against the storm. She reached up with her flipper and pulled his head close. He rested his forehead against her shoulder. A crack ran through the ice in her heart. If only her embrace could protect him from the end.

After a moment eternal, Shadow pulled back. “Selkie,” he said. “I understand the truth now. You don’t deserve to die.”

“H-huh?” Selkie stuttered.

“I know you wanted to give this to me. And I know there’ll be so much pain to follow. So, please forgive me for this.” Selkie watched helpless as the image of Shadow flickered before her. Before she could realize what was going on, he vanished like dust on the wind.

Selkie jumped up. “Shadow!” When he didn’t answer, she called louder, “Shadow!”

But Shadow didn’t answer. Selkie’s chest heaved, and she launched water gun after water gun in a circle around her, trying to hit him and break the illusion before he could get away. But her blasts dropped into the sand or smacked uselessly against floating rocks, and her partner was nowhere to be found. Selkie grit her teeth as dread sank through her body.

He couldn’t be… Could he?

#pokemon #pokemon fanfic #pmd #pmd fanfic #pmd fanfiction #pokemon fanfiction #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd till world's end #prose #literature #fanfic #popplio #zorua #fanfiction

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saltnpepperbunny · 10 months

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It's the first part of the TWE Author Q&A! Patron questions are now released, and we'll release the public questions in two parts. Thanks so much to everyone who asked a question!

NEXT: Public Questions Part 1 (coming soon) >

Read Till World’s End

(Selkie and Shadow heads drawn by @thetruegge)

#till world's end #pmd till world's end #pmd #qna #author qna #spb's writing #zorua #popplio #aspd #bpd

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saltnpepperbunny · 11 months

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Till World’s End- 9: Two Days Remain

PREVIOUS: Three Days Remain > NEXT: One Day Remains >

COVER

Till World’s End is rated Mature. Viewer discretion advised. Content Warnings listed on the Cover.

* * *

The wailing of wind through the open maw of stone sounded like a baby’s cry. Sleep never came to Shadow, for within minutes of closing his eyes, that infantile shrieking would jar him awake. Shadow was not a “kids’ pokemon.” If a baby was present, he had to leave the room. Something about laying eyes on a creature so miniscule, so shamelessly helpless, turned his stomach and brought bile to his throat. He didn’t understand his reasons behind it. All he understood was that a baby’s cry brought the itch of violence to his claws.

Shadow knew it was all in his head. The whining was just the wind. But when he stood outside the Cave and heard that sound, fear leashed him. Shaking, he turned tail and made sick in the bushes. The Cave was definitely empty; all he could smell within was bone cold nothing. But the what if held Shadow prisoner in the outside world. The sun rose, set, rose again, and still, the wind kept howling, and he did not venture in. What if…? What if…

Dawn painted the sky rose red. Shadow lifted his face to greet the morning. He had to do this. Before everything ended, he had to make his return, complete the circle. It was the only way to move on. But that damn wailing! What was he supposed to do to break the spell?

Shadow…

The zorua’s ears pricked. He whipped his head in the direction of the Cave entrance. His breath hitched. That voice… It couldn’t be. No.

Shadow… Shadow…!

He jumped to his feet. Body rigid, ears erect. It was just the wind, wasn’t it? It was just the wind? But the murmur of his name emanating from the mouth of the Cave was unmistakable. Shadow sometimes heard whispers on the wind. The rustling of leaves in the trees pieced together into words. He usually heard names, his own or Selkie’s. Sometimes, he heard taunts. But not in that voice. Never in that voice.

Shadow darted to the Cave’s mouth and looked deep into the darkness. She couldn’t be here, right? There was no way.

Shadow…

“M-m-m-mom…?”

Shadow… Come home…

His tail tucked between his legs. Shadow gulped. Who he would find within, he had no idea. But at the end of the day, Mom knew best. She would see through his inaction, she knew all he’d done was put off the inevitable. After all, his two nights of waiting had been pointless, hadn’t it?

Selkie never came to find him.

So, fine! He knew it was just the wind. There was no baby in the Cave! Whether Mom was in there or not, he didn’t give a damn. With the whisper of her voice curling in his ears, with the icy tremble of fear on his breath, with shaking paws, Shadow finally returned to the Cave.

His paw pads tread against frigid stone. The earth was flat and smooth beneath him. Shadow descended further and further into the dark. The tunnel pressed tight around him, and his whiskers brushed against the rock. Shadow worked hard to control his breathing. His lungs burned from effortful sucking of the breath. But though his paws resisted the forward momentum, though everything in him wished to collapse and curl up into a heap, Shadow pressed forward. The tunnel widened. The space opened. And Shadow stepped out into the wider space of the underground Cave.

Shadow’s lungs ached as he gazed out upon the skeletons littering the stone. He crept out amongst the stalks of bone blooming from the earth, looked into the sockets of each skull, and glassy feline eyes stared back. The cavern was a garden of bones. As Shadow stalked across the cemetery of unmarked graves, Lyn’s pleas for mercy echoed in his mind. A breeze from nowhere brushed past him, carrying on it the screams of the pokemon who died here. Somewhere, a baby cried. Wherever that wretched creature was, Shadow wished it would shut up.

He came to the place in the wall where the tunnel narrowed again, went deeper. Shadow swallowed his spit. He knew this way. What lay at the end. As Shadow descended further into the narrowing shaft, he heard the screams and wails of a child dragged into the depths. The tear stains caressed his cheekbones. He felt the talons peel through his fur and pinch into his skin as laughing monsters dragged his body against stone. Deeper, deeper. Crying for Mom. Where was Mom?

Shadow took a deep breath. If he lost himself in his mind now, he would never reach the bed. He pulled himself out of the labyrinth. The nightmare had been years ago. No living being walked the depths but him. He pressed on and went deeper.

The iron door of the cell was unlocked, just as they left it those years ago. The open doorway, pitch black. Shadow stopped and stared into the darkness, tried to swallow the building, bubbling panic in his chest. He was scared. So scared. He had to do this, but he could already feel it: The blinding pain of talons ripping through his skin, the horror of those cold blades digging through his flesh. His own screaming and crying bounced across the walls, and from the blackness echoed laughter. His body shuddered in sickness. The laughter was the worst part, it was always the worst part. How could someone gouge him, maim him, and just laugh? How? How?!

Shadow gasped, yanking himself once again from his own head. He realized he’d started to cry. Furiously wiping at tears, though his heart darkened at the thought of her, he longed for Selkie’s resolute strength. She left him to brave this place alone. Brought him back here in the first place. That fucking bitch.

Shadow shuddered under the swirling storm of his emotions. Angry, mournful, terrified, he choked back a sob and leaped forward into the black hole.

The cell was tiny. The ceiling low. Cramped. Shadow had no idea how long he’d spent prisoner here, but he remembered vividly the torturous claustrophobia, hardly enough room to pace let alone truly stretch. The constant, aching tension in his muscles measured up to the sharp, jarring pain of the beatings. Shadow stood still at the cell’s center. He let his tears fall. He listened silent to screams of blinding pain. Raucous laughter. His own voice, begging for mercy. Soft sobbing as he lay alone on the icy floor, clutching at his throbbing groin. The orchestra of the nightmare.

Shadow could so clearly see himself, small, unkempt, curled in the corner of the cell, crying alone. His heart, gouged open and oozing with black hatred for Mom. How could she do this? How could she abandon him to this?! Chest throbbing from the storming pain, Shadow fell to the floor of the cell and let loose a wail of agony. He covered his face in his paws and choked up sobs. The hatred for her consumed him, the agony of the betrayal, the understanding that she really had hated him this much. She threw him away like nothing, and the pain of it threatened to devour Shadow alive.

He took deep breaths, just as Selkie had shown him.

When the worst of the storm began to pass, still forcing himself to breath, Shadow lifted his head. Across the cell, blue eyes met the empty sockets of the Rogue’s bleached skull. His bones, like the rest of his minions, flowered from the spot where Selkie killed him. He would never forget it.

No, Shadow would never forget. The moment of his rescue was as distinct in his mind as that of his imprisonment and abuse. When the cell door swung open to reveal not the Rogue, but instead a popplio about his age, Shadow knew instantly that she was not amongst his captors. She stared at him like an alien, as if Shadow was the last pokemon she expected to find at the bottom of the earth. As if she was not the one out of place in this hell.

And then, the approaching footsteps of the Rogue. Thud, thud, thud, thud. Shadow had come to believe only pain and hatred could exist here. But somehow, he found again the white flower of kindness, bruised and buried deep, deep within his soul. “He’s coming… Quick, hide!”

Into the cell she came. After her came the Rogue, and the pain. Shadow embraced normality, the reality of his eternal prison, squeezed the scream in his throat and refused to cry out. Popplio, forgotten. This was his life. This was the world Mom abandoned him to. She sold him away for their money, how could she? He was never leaving this Cave, he would die here! He would never see the end of his misery!

Then Selkie sliced open the fabric of the world, and in came beams of light. Jumped from her hiding spot, and a burst of water separated the Rogue from Shadow. She rushed him, Shadow jumped back, and by the time he spun around to understand what the hell was going on, the deed was done. The Rogue was dead, murdered by Selkie.

Yet at this point, she was just Popplio, just a popplio with jewelry of teeth. Shadow couldn’t understand. The Rogue was dead? The Rogue was dead? What the hell was happening?!

“You… Y-y-you…”

“Saved your ass, that’s what! Now, unless you wanna sit around for them to lock you up again, get off your fucking tail! Let’s go!”

“What are you gonna do?”

“Fight.”

And she did. Popplio stormed the Cave, and every pokemon she found lay dead at her claws in seconds. Most never got the chance to scream. Shadow watched as one by one, the monsters who’d held him captive dropped, and dropped, and dropped. Thunk, thunk, thunk of bodies against the sticky stone floor. The world ripped apart, inverted.

When she was done, when the Rogue and all his minions lay dead at their feet, Shadow did not look at the bodies. His eyes lay only on her. The being with the power to tear the world asunder, to rip the fabric of the universe to shreds. She was a pokemon, just a popplio, but Shadow knew then this being was something different. If this world had abandoned him, then she could not be of this world. Something different. Something special. Something that, against all convention, had decided to save him.

Why? he asked with eyes alone.

In the still, murky pools of her eyes was no answer. All she did was hand him a fang.

It was overwhelming. Sheerly overwhelming. Looking out amongst the dead and the one who’d slain them, Shadow cried. He wept and wept, coughing up soft sobs, engulfed by the understanding that he was free. He’d been saved! He’d been saved… Good Arceus, how could he ever repay a debt so deep?

For now, his words would have to do. His actions would follow. He promised himself and, silently, her, the moment he took the fang from her delicate hold.

“T-t… T… Thank you.”

“… You’re welcome.”

They made introductions then. She introduced herself with a melodious name: Selkie. Shadow wanted to sing it to high heaven! She was a recruit with the Spectrum Island Rescue Guild, training in outlaw capture. A mission to apprehend the Rogue had brought her to the Cave. Wow, a solo recruit after Talonflame the Rogue? She must have been a big shot! As they caught up, the field of bodies surrounding them faded out of Shadow’s consciousness. All he could take in was her.

Together, they left the Cave.

Shadow would never forget Selkie’s glinting silhouette framed against the mouth of the tunnel as she guided him to freedom. The full moon illuminated the night sky, cloaking all in a misty blue, shedding pooling wisps of light across the jungle trees and earth. Seeing the outside world once again, feeling the breeze in his fur and the soft dirt beneath his pads, Shadow cried once again. Selkie rolled her eyes and snapped at him to hurry along, and he dutifully followed, but Shadow could not stop his weeping. Oh, how beautiful the world was! How beautiful, this chance Selkie gave him!

Together, they crossed the sea. What a terrifying journey! Shadow buried his face under Selkie’s collar and clutched on tight as she surfed the waves. She slipped through the water with swiftness and grace, slid across the foaming crests, and Shadow’s fur ran damp with saltwater. He was scared, but not like the Cave. His fear ran charged with the thrill of the journey, entering the unknown of second life.

Alone together, surrounded by open sky, Selkie and Shadow forged ahead into the dawn. Whatever came next, ensuing that blissful moment in time, Shadow believed right then that he could face it.

But Shadow would soon come to find that the challenges he would face at Spectrum Island Rescue Guild were near insurmountable. He would come to find what weak flesh he was made of.

That blissful moment in time between Selkie and Shadow, from their leaving the Cave to their arrival at the Guild, that liminal space, the gap between worlds where Shadow looked into a crack in the sky and saw potential, proved itself ephemeral. When Shadow saw a crowd of pokemon emerge from the Guild and fix him in their questioning gaze, his blood turned to ice. He cowered behind Selkie, putting her body between him and the onlooking strangers who just kept staring, stop fucking staring! When an oricorio stepped out from the crowd and approached Shadow, he snarled and shook, don’t come near him, don’t fucking come near him! Selkie growled at the oricorio to back off, but a makuhita barked at her to shut up, psycho, and Selkie slung insults back. Within seconds, the crowd was buzzing and barking, and the oricorio was still creeping closer, and Shadow couldn’t focus, there were too many pokemon, he couldn’t breathe! He spun around to bolt, but someone grabbed his tail and Shadow screeched. Kicked out with his back feet and connected with something solid. Someone grunted behind him, and Shadow’s lungs heaved but found no air. The world was getting louder, and darker, and darker…

Shadow remembered the tumult of his waking in the Guild’s infirmary. Waking up alone, panicking to find himself in a cave, panicking more when Oricorio, the Guild’s head nurse, came back in, and panicking even more when she trotted across the room in his direction. Within minutes of waking, he filled the infirmary with screams. Tried to bolt. Remembered being held down, unable to think, crying out. The commotion only remedied when Selkie’s bark cut through the nightmare fog. Growled at them all to “shut the fuck up, some pokemon are trying to sleep.” Despite the snarl on her tongue, the storm stilled in Shadow as he paused and soaked in the sight of her. She’d reappeared! His savior was back! She could protect him from these pokemon, right?

So, Shadow darted out from the crowd of nurses and heeled at Selkie’s side. Wagged his tail. “Hello again!” He ignored the stab of pain in his chest when Selkie looked him up and down like he’d drooled on her. She took a step back from him but then whipped around to the nurses and barked, “For Arceus’s sake, don’t just crowd the kid, you fucking morons! Did no one tell you where he came from?! Show a little fucking respect for once!”

That’s when Oricorio darted over and started to squabble with Selkie, but as they barked back and forth at each other, the nature of their words faded from Shadow’s consciousness. His eyes drank in Selkie alone. He watched her eyes pulse with irritation for the nurse, baring her sharp teeth, and Shadow saw again the glint of her fangs as she ripped out the throats of his captors. Something turned hot inside him.

He looked deep into the still pools of her eyes and within saw nothing through the murk. It daunted Shadow, but not like the crowding Guild pokemon frightened him. Not like the Rogue petrified him. The emotion he’d felt in his journey across the sea returned, and inside Shadow stirred the instinct not to run from what scared him… but to near it.

When Selkie left the infirmary, finally fed up with Oricorio’s bleating, Shadow trotted after her. Selkie didn’t notice at first, but as she shuffled through the hall and pricked her ears at the pawsteps behind her, her shoulders dropped with a huff. “I can hear you, y’know.”

“I, um… I wanted to go with you!”

Selkie turned to glare at him, but there was something halfhearted about it. She was clearly annoyed, but her eyes were still. The storm of rage that flared from her in the Cave was absent. Thankfully, not aimed at him.

“Why?” she muttered.

“Because I, ah… I wanted to! Is that okay?” Shadow’s tail wagged. His heart oozed with something warm and sticky and soft, perhaps blood? His cheekbones flared with heat, but he didn’t understand why. How could he explain to this pokemon that his attraction to her was beyond all language that could possibly explain it? Shadow wanted to be near her, just because!

Selkie scrutinized him for a long time. Shadow held his breath, awaiting the moment she might rebuff him and break his heart. Selkie’s gaze flicked steadily to and fro, up and down as she took Shadow in, he could see the gears spinning behind her eyes. She looked… annoyed? Or possibly… no… confused? Before Shadow could figure it out, the oncoming stomp, stomp, stomp of heavy footsteps startled them both out of the spell. An exploud and a glaceon approached them from further down the corridor.

“Hey, Selkie. That the kid you rescued from the Rogue?” Exploud’s voice rolled like soft thunder.

“It is.” Selkie squared her shoulders. Her face settled into an unamused scowl. Eyes still.

As Exploud and Glaceon approached further, Shadow found his paws carrying him behind Selkie. He peered out at the newcomers from behind her, felt ill from shame as they scrutinized his malnourished, scarred figure. Exploud scoffed. “Damn, he’s been through a number. You do that, Psycho?”

Shadow blinked in shock. What? What did he just say? There’s no way he heard right. But no, he watched Selkie’s eye bulge and twitch as she took a breath and growled back, “Obviously, his disfigurement is the fault of Talonflame. Why would I harm a victim for no reason?”

“You tell me,” Exploud chuckled, flicking one of the teeth on her leather chains. Selkie snapped at him with her teeth, and he wrenched back and guffawed. “Ha! You never change.”

Glaceon smirked. “I know she rescued you, Zorua, but keep a wide berth from Selkie if you know what’s good for you. She’ll hurt you just as bad as the Rogue did.”

Her words struck Shadow. Within him erupted a volcano of anger, but before he could even dare to retort, Exploud and Glaceon strolled off down the corridor and rounded a bend. The growl trailed from Shadow’s throat, cut off when Selkie hissed, “Shut it! If they hear you growling, they’ll come back and keep making nuisances of themselves.”

“Let them come back! T-t-they’ll get a piece of my mind!” Shadow yapped.

“What do you even care? You’re not the one they insulted!” Selkie growled.

“I know!” Shadow hollered. “But I’m furious! I hate what they said to you, what they said to me! How dare they?!” He huffed and heaved. Anger cracked bright, white, and electric in his mind. “You saved me from the Cave a-and the Rogue. You brought me back with you! Y-y-you saved my life! How could I stand to hear someone insult you for it?”

Selkie’s eyes widened. She blinked. Then scratched the back of her head. “Oh…” A pause. “Okay.” And her eyes softened.

Shadow blinked back at her, not sure what to make of her reaction. She didn’t smile, she didn’t thank him. Just, okay. And her eyes softened. At least she wasn’t scrutinizing him in cold confusion anymore? His heart oozed with warmth… But still, maybe he said the wrong thing. “Um, I’m sorry if I overreacted.”

“It’s fine.” Selkie turned down the corridor. “Um, if you’re not interested in staying in the infirmary, you can follow me if you really want. Just… keep five feet back. If you get too close to me, you’re done.”

She started off down the corridor then, and Shadow’s brows shot up in surprise. Oh! Okay! He could keep five feet back! He trotted after her, a respectful distance behind, shoving aside the agonizing urge to push further, closer into her bubble, snuggle against her. No way was he gonna mess this up!

And so, in between healing at the infirmary and trying to answer Guild’s pressing questions about the Rogue, Shadow followed Selkie around the Guild. He kept five feet behind just as she’d asked, except for when she turned her head or lost herself in a book, at which point he would sneak closer. Four feet, maybe three. Shadow would follow Selkie to the mess hall, to the library where she read quietly for long hours, to the morning briefing, to the beach to decompress and splash in the crisp surf. Shadow could tell his presence agitated Selkie. She’d hunch her shoulders when he hovered behind her, would sometimes shudder like a bug-type was crawling up her back. Sometimes, she’d bark at Shadow to back up further or get lost, and he would retreat to the infirmary in quiet tears, unsure why it hurt so bad but understanding more each day that his attraction to Selkie was swelling like a tumor in his heart. At night, he dreamt of the Cave and of her.

Selkie must have hated him. Shadow could understand why. He cringed at the way his magnet heart pulled him to her. He knew she hated his looming presence, the attention flustered and unnerved her. Shadow knew it the day she caught him hovering over her sleeping form and shoved him back with her flipper. “For Arceus’s sake, you cling to me like my own shadow!” He ran back to the infirmary sniffling, cried through the night. Nurse Oricorio stroked his back as Shadow’s heart tore itself asunder, victim to the storm, terrified that Selkie was fed up with him, done. The next time he saw her, Selkie said to him, face neutral, “Hello again, Shadow.” His heart burst. His tail wagged. He turned the pet name over in his brain. Shadow.

From their first meeting in the Cave, Shadow never introduced himself with his childhood name. This was for two reasons. The first: Even thinking the name brought nausea deep to Shadow’s gut, let alone uttering it aloud. His mind whispered it in Mom’s haunting voice. It bound him at the ankles, shackling his soul to the one who abandoned him. Second: Shadow felt reluctant to introduce himself as a pokemon who was truly dead and rotting.

He kept it secret even from Selkie, especially from Selkie, the understanding that he was somehow both living and dead. Shadow knew that he’d entered the Cave, and some number of weeks later, Selkie delivered him out. But he vividly remembered dying, crumbling into earth, the Cave had become his tomb alongside his captors. Mom’s child followed the Rogue into the crypt, and that boy had bled and fractured and mutated, withered. The thing that escaped the dark was unrecognizable from that which it had been birthed. A shadow of the real pokemon he’d once been. Shadow spent more nights than not in the infirmary pooling over his fragmented memories trying to figure out if he’d died, if he hadn’t, when it happened, how. They returned no understanding, just nightmares.

Shadow didn’t know who or what he was anymore. All he knew was when he searched within for himself, he found nothing but empty space and blank walls upon which long shadows stretched. A smoking wisp of nothing, an empty field after the battle. Hadn’t there been something there before? Something he could feel within and grasp onto that reminded him he was a person? Or had he really always been so empty?

He breathed in Selkie’s pet name and let it fill him up. When she continued to call him Shadow, he never once complained. Within time, amongst the Guild, it took root. Selkie started to let him follow her four feet behind.

Shadow came to understand some things about Selkie as he observed her from behind. For one, she handed out fibs like candy. White lying seemed to be one of Selkie’s most impulsive habits. Shadow couldn’t tell if she prepared them beforehand, so once when they were alone, he asked her about it. Selkie shrugged and responded that they “kinda just came to her in the moment.” Most often, they were harmless falsehoods, functioning to smooth over the interactions that came to her with much difficulty. But Shadow often watched her lie for the purpose of soliciting coin from other pokemon, sometimes in a pinch after realizing she’d forgotten her own money at home, sometimes to soothe a foul mood. Then she’d buy herself a treat at the canteen. Her favorites were the blue poffins.

Sometimes she lied about other pokemon. Shadow once watched from afar as Selkie huddled in a corner with two younger Guild apprentices, whispering of how Exploud coerced his partner Glaceon to please him after light’s out. Shadow could hardly keep his jaw from dropping as he watched Selkie assemble her face into an uncanny approximation of sympathy. The way she made her voice tremble with concern as she spoke of the horrors Exploud enacted against Glaceon made Shadow’s stomach turn. But wow… So, she didn’t take their insults lying down, huh? She took back her power in the shadowed corners of the Guild halls, and though the eeriness of her masking gave Shadow chills, he recognized the virtue in it. Selkie did not just roll over and take it. She was stronger than that.

The pokemon she lied about sometimes caught wind of the rumors, but rarely did they trace the root of the grapevine back to Selkie. Exploud was an unfortunate exception.

Shadow was watching Selkie practice aqua jet in the training grounds when Exploud stormed in, beelined for Selkie, and punched her hard in the back. Her pained screech jolted Shadow like a livewire. She whipped around and blasted Exploud with water gun, igniting battle. Exploud was a brick wall of an opponent, but despite the assault of his hypersonic roars and walloping punches, Selkie came back at him just as hard. She fought with terrifying ferocity, threw herself into attacks just to deliver her own, she didn’t even seem to feel pain! The horror of watching Exploud bruise and bloody her, combined with Selkie’s own inability to stop throwing herself at him over and over, dragged the cry out of Shadow’s mouth: “Stop it, stop it! STOP HURTING HER!”

When his cry fell on deaf ears and Exploud reeled back to swing again, though the sight of spattering blood and purplish bruises terrified Shadow beyond end, his paws carried him forth. Without thought, he decided. Exploud screamed as Shadow bit down on his forearm. His teeth, charged with pulsing dark energy. Exploud hollered and shook Shadow off, and the zorua scrambled back out of the way of his swinging arms. He met eyes with Selkie, and the still pools within rippled. She stared at him like he’d burst into light.

Later, as Nurse Oricorio treated their wounds in the infirmary (finally having shut up about how Selkie should “know better than to be spreading fibs about her fellow Guild mon”), fixing her gaze on the ground, Selkie muttered to Shadow, “Why did you do that?”

Shadow hesitated to answer. Why did he do that? Violence still petrified him; he was still shaking from the anxiety of the altercation. But within he found not a smidge of regret. “I don’t know,” he said. “I just couldn’t stand to see someone harm you.”

Selkie’s eyes narrowed. “Was he not within reason? You know what he’s pissed about. You know I did it.”

Shadow shrugged. “He started it.” Her eyes softened.

From there, something changed. It was a slow shift in the relationship between them, not one he understood was happening in the moment but psychically sensed. It was the shift from walking four feet behind Selkie to padding at her side. The shift from watching Selkie read books to reading them to her aloud at her request. From watching her train to heeding the call as she beckoned him to practice his dark-type moves with her. When they sparred on the training grounds, dark magic against water, Shadow came to life. The rhythmic movements of their violent dance shook loose scar tissue in his heart. In those moments, he felt like a real pokemon again, and Selkie had given it to him. A single petal in the flower of her heart had opened to him, and with it, in little ways their closeness grew. Not just Selkie and her shadow. Selkie and Shadow.

He felt it in those summer nights when he’d lie awake with throbbing heartache as he longed to lie beside her. All their time apart sent him buzzing, grinding his teeth in anxiety, pacing the infirmary, tending to separation pangs. Shadow had never known dependence, had only ever seen it in Mom, but he recognized then his addiction to Selkie. Every moment together swelled his heart with euphoria. Every moment apart left him despondent, anxious, and painfully lonesome. The company of the other Guild pokemon ceased to hold meaning. When Selkie went out on missions, Shadow was thunderstruck with wild terror that she may not come back.

He knew even then that his explosive fear agitated her. She dreaded the obligatory visit to the infirmary after every mission to calm Shadow down. His raging emotional storm unnerved her, he could see it in her rippling still water eyes. But her leavings horrified him, and he had no idea how to make it stop. The mental torture eventually became too much, and one night—the day after Selkie snapped and called him a “perpetual crybaby”—Shadow snuck out from the Guild and stole away. Voices whispered on the wind, calling him with his old name and new, and Shadow knew it was the right choice. His intention: Find a tall bridge to jump off.

Shadow’s trailing paws took him higher up the island. Above a gorge that split through the land, he found a rickety suspension bridge. Looked down into the tumbling waters below and imagined his brittle bones breaking upon the rocks. His second life, evaporated. Wasted on something weak and worthless. The Rogue’s raucous laughter bounced across the gorge walls. The river hissed in Selkie’s voice. At least his action could free her of the obligation.

“So, this is where despair brings you?”

When Selkie spoke out, Shadow didn’t expect it to truly be her. But suddenly she was beside him, Shadow nearly jumped out of his skin. Something about her materializing beside him snapped Shadow out of his lonesome spell, and he became cognizant of just how high up they were. “S-Selkie…” Shadow breathed. “You followed me?”

“I saw you leave, and I was bored. I hoped you’d go somewhere interesting,” Selkie said. She didn’t look at him but instead stared into the bottom of the gorge. “Do you mean to jump off?”

Shadow gulped. “I did…” Selkie said nothing, still staring below. “What d-do you think of that?”

For a long time, she remained silent. Stared into the waters below. A breath of a ripple crossed her still water eyes. “I… don’t know.” A pause, a breath. “I’ve seen death rock the world of people and pokemon alike, but it never fazed me. Been to funerals but never shed tears. I think if you died, I would recover.”

Shadow’s throat trembled. “O-Oh…”

Selkie stared into the void below. Her eyes dimmed. Shadow felt ice on her breath. “I know yearning for death is ordinary. I’ve read so much online and in books about people wanting to die. Like catching the common cold. In my world, several millions die from suicide every year.”

Shadow’s brows furrowed. “In your world?”

“But even though it’s common, it’s still weakness. Most would stand to collapse before they could ever reveal it. I have never once heard someone admit to me that they want to die.” Selkie looked up. Her gaze pierced the storm of Shadow’s eyes. Probed his soul. “A night or two after I returned you to the Guild, I tried to drink myself to death.”

Shadow’s jaw dropped. “Selkie…?”

“That’s not even my real name. I threw away the old one when I got here.” She spoke matter-of-factly, but Selkie’s eyes swam with darkness. “I thought I could make something of your world for me. I have never known what it’s like to come home. I thought I could find it here, but something about the night we met knocked something loose in me. There’s no world I could call home.” She looked at him hard. “Let’s jump together. You and I.”

Shadow stood there, stupefied. What the fuck was going on? Selkie wanted to jump with him? What? He questioned whether the popplio before him was real or illusory and reached out a paw to prod her chest just to make sure.

Selkie flinched from his touch. “Why are you poking me?!”

Shadow responded with the only words that came to mind. He looked her in the eye. “Selkie is the only name I’ve ever known you by. It’s real to me.”

“It’s the name of a monster.”

“No. It’s your name. And it’s as real as the one you gave to me,” said Shadow. Selkie breathed. “I felt like you hated me. That’s why I came here.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Are you sure?”

“I assumed maybe you hated me. I’m so often the source of your pain.”

“I could never hate you, Selkie!”

Under the full moon on the bridge above the gorge, they talked for hours. Shadow lost track of the time as Selkie, usually so quiet, let loose the contents of her mind. She spoke of the stillness of her heart and soul. She spoke of boredom and anhedonia and how she’d long forgotten the feeling of joy. She spoke of purposelessness and explained the definition of nihilism. She spoke of feeling adrift, alone, understimulated, and deeply hateful. She spoke of only ever feeling truly alive in the rush of battle. She spoke of wanting to die since she was a young child.

And Shadow spoke as well. Spilled what had tormented his mind for so long. He spoke of plaguing nightmares and the voices on the wind, of unendurable emotional storms that left him gasping, reeling. He spoke of the uncertainty regarding his own death in the Cave, and of reaching inside and feeling nothing where his self should be. He spoke of the crippling, unshakable fear that someday, Selkie would come to regret her choice in saving him. That someday, she too would be gone, and he would have nothing.

Selkie asked him where such a convincing fear came from. Shadow paused then, gulped. He’d never told anyone this before. But the momentum of their conversation and the comfort of her listening ear soothed Shadow’s anxieties. Selkie knew of the Cave, so Shadow told her of before. He spoke of Mom, who hated him from the start. The ways she berated him, criticized him, cuffed him when he cried. Made salient how Shadow was the living reminder of her own pain. Sometimes she cuddled and kissed him, licked him behind the ears and told him she was sorry. But those moments had been fleeting and ultimately meaningless. They didn’t save him from the exchange, the Rogue, or the Cave. They didn’t save him when she threw him away like nothing.

Shadow couldn’t take the pain his memories brought. He clutched his head, pulled his own fur, cried, and screamed. The excruciating emotional storm ripped him apart inside, and Shadow was sinking under the waves. In desperation, he jumped at her, clung to her. Felt her muscles tense and braced for her to shove him off. Instead, she murmured a question.

“Does it help your pain if we touch?”

“Y-y-yes…” Shadow hiccupped. “I-is it okay?”

“… I guess so.”

And so, under the full moon on the bridge above the gorge, Shadow grieved. And Selkie held him.

When he finally calmed, breathing against her stillness, Selkie murmured to him again. “Shadow… I’m going to take you back to the Guild now. I have something very important to tell you about this world.”

As Selkie led him down from the bridge, as she guided him back down the island and to the doorstep of Spectrum Island Rescue Guild, as she took him inside and let him into her dorm, Shadow marveled at the fact that though Selkie was a stranger to it herself, she could still gift to another soul the feeling of coming home.

They huddled in her dorm and spoke together until dawn washed the little room in soft gray light. Hopes of sleep forgotten, Selkie told Shadow unbelievable things. How she was not a pokemon but a human summoned from another world. How this world was marked for death, and she was a hero tasked to save it. How her meeting with Shadow had snuffed out all desire to accomplish that goal.

She asked Shadow what he thought of that. She asked if he believed she should save the world. Shadow answered, “No.”

Together in that little underground space, a human and a pokemon sealed the fate of the world. Between them bloomed a secret, an agreement, an unbreakable pact. Maybe their choice was born in anger. Maybe it was born in hatred or despair. No matter the nature of its origin, from their choice, their secret, something incredible came into being. Something greater than Selkie and Shadow combined. From the union of their powerless bodies, Selkie and Shadow forged together the power to destroy worlds. It was a power greater than stillness and greater than storms. Together, they could become the tempest that would lay waste to all that had and could hurt them. No longer alone together, but a singularity. A team.

Was this love?

But now, they were divided. The power that they birthed together, from their separation, was now forfeit. Shadow was back in the Cave, called back by Mom, staring into the empty sockets of the buried monster that had abused him. What happened? What had gone so wrong? The destruction they wrought would still come to pass, but what about all they had built together? What about Selkie and Shadow? Was everything between them truly… over?

Shadow kicked over the Rogue’s skull as he ran from the cell. He didn’t give the skeletons a passing glance as he dashed by. They were dead and gone, the Cave was a tomb, but not his. Someone had died here, but Shadow was still alive. As long as he was still breathing, he would make it back out. He would make it back to her. Maybe there was nothing to salvage, but he couldn’t know until he tried.

The light of the sun cut through Shadow’s eyes as he sprang from the Cave. Before the end of everything, he had to know for sure.

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