#perhaps a little weird lol

[megamanrecut]

Vastly underestimated how much I had to do this week (and next :S) but had a spare half hour (...sorta) so here's a quick battonton~

#my art #digital art #support units #battonton #they almost look like batman logos #or at least this one does #also first time noticing the RS battotons have blue eyes like Wily #perhaps a little weird lol #megaman #ruby spears mega man #rockman

[zhongrin]

yk, while chinese is a nightmare to learn (for me at least) they're also such an interesting language... "来, 小姐!" hits a lot different than "miss, your order's ready!" but i can't really explain why hahahah

#rin rambles #why did they use the 姐 hanzi? is there a 小妹 too? perhaps used for younger looking females?? it's just. so interesting to me hsldjfsd #it's always so interesting to see but also kinda weird bc sometimes i see a hanzi and knows what it says/means in jp but then i have 0 idea #-if it means the same or how it reads/sounds in cn lol #i think. maybe. if i was born in an environment that actually supports leaning chinese i might have taken to it a little more. #but at this point i just can't with memorization as an adult #and as a younger person having to learn it in school but unable to use it anywhere just makes it feel like i have to learn it just for the- #-sake of grades so i hated it at that time. there were lots of other subjects that was more 'important' so it felt even more meaningless- #-that time bc even if i somehow managed to learn it. it's not like i'll be able to use it anywhere ;;;; #still..... it is tempting.... to just learn for the sake of learning. and it is usable for my current situation.... maybe. mayhaps.

[inkwingsinc]

Chapter 22 of BMGWMBGG posted...and y'all already know where chap23 is gonna go just from the ending alone :3

(also, I don't think I've had Laera and Feyd have a single sexual encounter that doesn't somehow involve blood...my #blood kink tag is really doing some heavy lifting)

#Feyd-Rautha #Dune fanfiction #bmgwmbgg #bit my gun with my black gold gums #the update didn't take a week this time! perhaps 5-6k words is more manageable every 2-4 days than 10k monsters #it certainly makes editing easier #also an aside: I've gotten at least three future chapters written but they're a little too far in the future for me to post yet LOL #inkwings rambles #also should I include an eating disorder tag on the story? I uhhhh will have characters display some weird habits regarding food

[unproduciblesmackdown]

mordecai is the first funny bitch like spends 90% of his time literally just standing there going "i'm dapressed" to himself while everyone in the vicinity takes potshots and then he's clocking in for the night shift where for the next 9 hours people go "god mordecai would it kill you to act like you're having more fun at the [kills you] factory"

#The First Funny Bitch as a phrase from the ''cain was the first funny bitch'' post that i will use with some flexibility. yaknow. #i love going like oh boy a coworker triumvirate. their funny little guy (other duo going ''i want him dead'') #though it's unfair to the savoys lmfao if he's at best sometimes a desk toy to them: they do at least keep calling him babygirl #and giving him special mordecai invitations (by not inviting him) to their hotel room to try to marry him #so if nothing else we do appreciate adding a ton of flair to [afflicting the autistic coworker] #in turn i appreciate that mordecai and viktor's dynamic probably consisted of mutual ''i Do Not Care if my coworker seems weird'' #but outside of that; was anyone at lackadaisy aggrieving mordecai with the style & variety that the savoys bring....perhaps not #an upgrade in that realm....and there seems to be Some mutual [i do not care if my coworker seems weird] there again too lol #even while they've all probably been working together like half a week & haven't all worn their getalong sweater long enough #and already mordecai is doing his [not just literally standing there] rogue lone mystery solving deal lmao. wild card that he is #lackadaisy #oh also speaking of [before mordecai went grr i Hate still working here; ripped off the fridge door; went & got a new Hated job] #it's pure bonus comic realm & particularly Elevated Silly Goofs genre at that; but #points for ivy having that Younger Sibling dynamic w/mordecai w/the implication she takes his forbidden condiments index seriously #and like; in general lol not even just a [it's serious when it comes to dealing with this weird guy] way. all the more powerful for that #wait i nearly forgot to mention the hot new otp: mordecai / j.j. #that's right [sad trombone] providing guy. i know enough. first funny bitch 4 first funny bitch. #[guy doing his own thing & everyone's like Get His Ass] 4 [guy doing his own thing & everyone's like Get His Ass] #and ofc because it is funny in & of itself. & basically like Your New OC. so much room to maneuver that you cannot crash #also hmm like if your nickname for someone is Maybe ''annoying mf'' does it cancel out....eh #numbers flying around intense focus like everything points to ''hatchet would directly translate to hatchette not petit hache'' #and if you mon petit hache it (read this w/such a meter that it all rhymes) #900 tons of restraint not going ''wow this is just like analyzing billions'' & by even saying i've managed to avoid as much; now i haven't

[welcometogrouchland]

(for the drawing reqs) i recently finished toh s1 ;-; can you draw eda and lilith? also hiiii i hope youre having a good day :)

[ID: Two images featuring Eda and Lilith from the owl house. The first image shows the two at the end of season 1 embracing on a white background. Eda looks at Lilith, who's crying, with tears in her eyes, smiling. her hair pushed to the side to make room for Lilith's face on her shoulder. Words written above the two read "I just miss how it felt".

The second image has a black background and shows a glowing yellow silhouette of the sisters embracing in the first image. Inside the sillouhette is young Eda and Lilith- Eda is dragging Lilith along while leaves flit about them. Words above them read "standing next to you". End ID]

wearing matching dresses/ before the world was big

YESSSSS CLAWTHORNE SISTERS BRAINROT ALWAYS LETS GOOOOOO!!!!!!

#the owl house #Eda Clawthorne #eda the owl lady #lilith clawthorne #lyrics in the drawing and in the caption are from before the world was big by girlpool #it's good these specific lines always make me think abt sisters and nostalgia for no particular reason? #my own biases I'm sure lol #anyway the first image is a bit sketchy and for the second one i did some lines on a VERY loose sketch #so like #not everything is perhaps in tiptop shape here #but tbh I'm REALLY happy with how the anatomy/pose came out on the first one I'm not great at drawing characters interacting #but this felt like a big improvement on my past attempts i feel like there's contact there #and in the second one i mainly enjoyed drawing young Eda and Lilith hehe #clawthorne sisters make me go INSANNNEEEE #especially on liliths part #she literally always cares abt her sister like that is consistent across every appearance she ever has even in agony of a witch #she's just the worlds most brainwashed and emotionally stunted and weird woman #and it means that in s1 her attempts to help just hurt #AND EDA ALWAYS FORGIVES HER because that's her sister. they're sworn enemies they r besties they're rivals they r allies #lilith will curse her and feel horrible abt it for the rest of her life and still make fun of eda. because thats her little sister #she's legally obligated to dunk on her #AND EDAS LIKE. lol okay whatever. #because that's her big sister and she loves her and edas always had the upper hand their whole life so she legit doesn't care #she'll tie lillys pointy shoes together or put glue in her shampoo or body swap her with a dog or guilt trip her for cursing her #it's just. it's sooooooo #i wish lilith had gotten more screentime in s2 because while all her beats hit for me i wish there was more breathing room #but like. i do still love the essential ethos behind the clawthorne sisters. yes its a beautiful tale of wrongdoing and reconciliation #but it's also abt 2 petty and mak adjusted women in their forties behaving like children every time the other is around #and i just think that's beautiful ❤️ #anyway I'm having a LOVELY day now that i got to talk abt these two iris lol thank you for ths

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Hey I’ve heard you have your own sparrow rare pair with nick

may I offer nick doing gender-fluid sparrow’s eyeliner.

👀👉👈 Who me? A rare pair? No no… I would never… And certainly not one that’s doomed to be unpopular in light of popular fanon, no, that would be so foolish of me…

(You know, the thing about rare pairs is, a lot of it is just people taking their favourite characters and making them smooch, and yes I am no exception)

☺️🌸 and yes, you absolutely may! Truthfully I’d accept this with any form of Sparrow, though the specific appeal of gender fluid Sparrow is one that I’ve toyed with on my own time 🤔 (true for Lark as well actually? Ik this isn’t about him but… Well idk truthfully I’ve never been the type to get super caught up in those kinds of HCs necessarily but for some reason when it comes to Lark… Idk it interests me a bit more for whatever reason!). Anyways yes! This is very sweet fluffy and up my alley 🥰

:] Eventually Sparrow would try doing Nick’s eyeliner too I think! Maybe those art skills would come in handy…

😤😌💜 Thank you kindly for the offering!

#🤔 perhaps I owe you some Terrow hc in return… No promises but I’ll try to think on it! #I’m high key so embarrassed about shipping them #Especially cause I actually really like a lot of the Nark fanatics #Genuinely I think so many of them are like kinda super cool and making awesome content #So this almost feels like a dirty little secret #Not that it’s so secret but still… A little! #Also I hope this isn’t weird to say #I can get a bit irrationally nervous talking about this kinda thing but #I actually like “gender fluid oak garcia twin” the most in the context where it’s true for both of them (like both Lark and Sparrow) #I’ve more thoughts there tbh but I’m… Shy #yes #A bit shy is what I am #Hehe #Sparrow x Nicky #<- my dumbass has thought of ship names for them too #Maybe lovesong #But consider highjinx #Get it like high and hi-jinx yeah you get it #They’d smoke weed and listen to music together LOL #rarepair

[rimouskis]

ayudame, I was mansplained to yet again today at work

#why are pedants..... like that. why. I am quickly finding out why the whole team has weird feelings about this guy lol #he isn't even the subject matter expert he's literally just waiting for anything vaguely in his realm of knowledge to pop up #so he can then Overexplain it to someone. like dude have you considered that perhaps people have previous knowledge #and going into interactions with the intention of explaining Every Little Detail to people is going to make them tire of you FAST? no? #aaaaagh lol

[icewindandboringhorror]

Daily Log 4

Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.

Activities: Woke up late because I went back to sleep with a headache briefly, then kind of struggled to focus all day ToT

Worked more on the aforementioned tapestry/painting type of thing. I've done the base layer of painting for the main image, now I'm lining in darker outlines. I wanted to finish the center art before getting into the intricate borders. Still haven't translated the text lol..

Made a small bowl and also a little box with a lid out of more avocado pits. Still just with random nail cuticle tool things and kitchen knives, as I don't have proper carving tools.

Finished editing and proofreading the new poll adventure post!! I don't have time to post it tonight because I need to get to sleep early but.. I have it Completely 100% Ready.. finally..

Also washed the clothes I got together yesterday. Called about the bloodwork. Sent an email to a doctor.

Reviewed some writing documents to get back into my game maybe?? (basically, I started working on a visual novel type game a few years ago, decided it was a huge project so kind of put it on the backburner for a while in favor of things that were more easily finishable/tangible. then later on a game website I play (similar to neopets or something, there are collectable little creatures, etc.) there was an opportunity for me to design a pet on site, so I made a smaller shorter visual novel centered around that, where people on the site have to play the game in order to earn the pet, and I have a google form for them to answer a few short questions about it. All of the feedback is quite positive (reached 200 responses a while ago! though still only like 4 comments on the itch.io page lol.. Mandatory Form vs. Optional Comments evil showdown), but sometimes I get commentary that's really enthusiastic and inspires me to start back working on the OTHER bigger game. The small game was kind of like, a proof of concept that was safe because I had a guaranteed audience, that has helped me gain more insight for the larger one.

Anyway, since I've abandoned the Main Large Game for so long, I have to re-read and review/probably rewrite A LOT of things just to pick it back up again as A Thing I'm Actively Working On, so it's another one of those tasks that I do maybe 45 minutes of and then realize it's going to take days and days and get discouraged lol..

Notable sights: Saw two cats in windows. No clovers. It rained a little today but I didn't get to go outside and see it. One of the pieces of asparagus in the fridge was like the size of a carrot, comically overgrown downright ridiculous looking asparagus. Maybe I'll get taller after eating it.

Goals moving forward: Consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit costume pictures & etc.

Notable foods: ASPARAGUS AGAIN BABEY.. yeaAAAAGHHH asparagus squad !!!!!!

#just posting these publicly since it feels more like I'm doing something or easier to hold yourself accountable if you make public #declarations of goals and progress or etc. .. perhaps.. for now.. #I wonder if you can eat too much asparagus. Hopefulyl I don't get sick ghjbj #Still craving lots of savory foods and soups. Also in a big big worldbuilding mood. #Not enough to actually edit the worldbuilding slideshow videos apparently since I've barely done any of that all week #>:Y #(they are different though.. actively writing wolrdbuilding is different from like.. editing recordings of you talking about it #BUT STILL...) #In an ideal world I have a little house in scotland or canada or something and am sitting cozy by a window watching it #rain whilst I eat lasagna and like a huge buffet table of every single hearty food I am having Anemia Cravings for #and my cat is sitting near me and I am furiously sketching various designs for different worldbuilding details. I have finally found #a weird hermit platonic best friend I'm compatible enough to live with and they are up in the attic doing their own weird little hobbies #but every once in a while I can call them down and tell them about an idea so we can bounce concepts off of each other. I somehow walk away #with no heartburn or stomach upset or nausea despite eating 800 plates of craving foods. It's cold and summer #does not exist anymore but not in a Catastrophic For The Earth type of way more in a like.. I am in a magical bubble #that only affects my direct vicinity and sheilds me from the temperature ever getting above 65F #(also I have a comfortable amount of money and good doctors and reasonable health etc. etc. but that's a given in any Ideal Scenario lol) #oughh... I just want to eat hearty breakfast foods and think about elves for 5 hours.. is that so much to ask #Why must... responsibilities... capitalism... limited time and no energy to focus on 100 projects at once... why these things... #ANYWAY #daily log

[queenlua]

this is objectively a stupid thing to stew over because The Bright Sessions obviously wasn’t trying to be High Art and i was just listening to it while running errands and shit, but

it’s been a couple days and man

i still can’t get past how hard that show leaned into the whole “anyone who is not Superficially Pleasant And Nice And Chummy is not only awkward/ill-fitting/socially weird but actually wrong and bad” thing, near the end of Damien’s plotline

it just gives me the absolute heebie jeebies.  when i bumped my knee against this ~theme~ in The Long Way To A Small, Angry Planet i felt like i needed to shower for a week to get the yuck off.  i mean i read plenty of stuff by people whose worldviews i find actively repugnant, but those bother me way less than the cozy-group-hug vibe of This Particular Kind Of Fiction.  i think maybe because there are plenty of repugnant worldviews that are least based in something, some kind of (rotten) premises or (misguided) ideal they’re trying to achieve or some self-consistent conception of the good.  whereas this Group Hug (Except For That One Guy, You Know The Guy) stuff is a conception of the good based on nothing, literally nothing beyond how blandly pleasant someone is to hang out with, and fuuuuuck that

in my paranoid moments i worry this sort of thing is just becoming The Default Moral Ideology of my general irl social class/milieu and i freak all the fucking way out (flashback to that one time i went on [mildly bougie vacation] with some acquaintances and absolutely started sobbing on the car ride home even though nothing bad had happened, it was just this dreadful vibe)... but realistically i’m p sure this is just a tiny weird self-satisfied corner of the world that has disproportionate influence in, like, YA publishing and a couple other weird corners or something

but who the fuck knows.

anyway if paradise doesn’t have sinners i’m not fucking going

#look i just want to write silly little fic about Mark being sad and traumatized in peace #but the way they handled the fuckin Damien fuckshit ruins that joy for me! bastards!!! #to be clear i don't think the correct way to handle this would be Damien joining the group hug or anything like that. #honestly it was super weird and kind of cloying how close everyone became after the mission and there could be Less Of That In General #but if you're going to have everyone in a group hug and mark this one guy out as The Baddie... i'll notice that lol #if i had been righteous myself perhaps there would have been no criminal standing before me bla bla you know the rest of the bit

[supahstarrr]

hot take. you're weak if you can't take a single negative criticism, opinion or complaint about a character you like... UNLESS the negative opinion, criticism or complaint is based on: misinfo, misinterpretation of canon, ignorance towards the character's traits or bias stemming from discrimination. dare i say you're also weak if you're worrying about someone having a hate account about your favorite character.

#im using the word 'weak' to seem more mean but like i dont think thats ACTUALLY the word id use if im being serious #in SERIOUS terms: you're fragile. perhaps depending on the person you are: you are a coward #and likes its okay to be those things. im like this towards things too (not rlly about characters but about SOME of my beliefs) #what gets me with these people are that they overreact to stuff like calm down a little??? #and about the last part. its a little weird to have an account soley on hating a character but its like. idk whatever man lol #some people dont want to put that kind of negativity on their main so eh #anyways. that one tiktok hate account focused on hating on my fav had me gagged like they were lowkey right about her design #sunny's thoughts

[magioffire]

you know how in fae myths a common way to spot a fae/see through their glamours is to try to look for discrepancies in their limbs/digits, like having too many joints, too few or too many fingers, animalistic limbs like goat legs, etc etc etc. and that got me thinking about the speculative evolutionary side of a creature like the dokkalfar that pretty much spend equal amounts of time climbing and walking upright, and their hands and feet should reflect this. as such, they would end up looking...decidedly inhuman in those areas even if they manage to hide their other inhuman traits. but close enough to a human’s hands and feet that its uncanny valley still.

a key trait of my design philosophy with (humanoid) fae is to try to make them feel decidedly inhuman and alien, but while still retaining enough of a human-like element to keep them within the realm of uncanny valley. human enough at least at first glance to make you feel uncomfortable af. so i didn’t exactly what to give them like, straight up bug feet (that would also be too much of a departure from the general body plan i have for the dokkalfar, it would likely result in changing their entire lower body plan to suit it)

so.... after much deliberation i have decided to fuck with dokkalfar’s anatomy by giving them a weird cross between human-like and lemur-like feet. which look pretty suited for a creature that spends a lot of time walking around upright but also needs the extra support for climbing. our toes basically become fcking useless (for climbing, anyway) when we humans left the trees, as the jungle receded into grassland/savannah and tundra, the evolutionary pressure to be Tall Enough to see over the grass was greater than the evolutionary pressure to be a good tree climber. but dokkalfar never experienced the evolutionary pressure to completely give up climbing, their world is full of jungle and forests. if anything, their environment would need to be pressuring them to be both very effective climbers and upright walkers. so hence, they got weird ass fucking opposable thumb hand ass feet. like lemurs. cursed af and i love it.

maybe the ‘thumb’/toe would not be so....dramatically elongated as it would make walking (and running) upright somewhat of a challenge, but elongated and pronated enough to allow some level of opposable flexibility. gripping onto branches and rock-faces (and lamp-posts) would be extremely easy with this sort of adaptation. it would certainly make their ability to crawl up walls and hang from ceilings seem more within the realm of possibility rather than some gravity-defying magic shit (not that it isnt out of the realm of possibility for these damn fae lol)  i prefer biological explanations over purely magical ones generally

#i just think they should be weird your honor :) #this also complicates the subject of...shoes #no way they would be able to wear normal human shoes #even if the 'toe' is not so dramatically elongated #perhaps going barefoot or having minimalistic footwear would be the norm while more complicated footwear would be for nobles #sandals are still gonna be the Ideal Footwear for them #but it does make uh...boots...a little complicated.... #biology. #canons. #ummmm sorry for this cursed mental image btw sorry i couldnt just let it be LOL #but its kinda my job to overthink these things #vali: *shakes ur hand with his weird ass hand foot* #first contact be like

[barbiebiddie]

im so obsessed with them not hugging on trixie motel. like, whats different? any and all the others guests can be described as friends and business partners of trixie, and she had no problem then... so what stops them from having a casual friendly hug? unless its not that for them at all...

#sorry but its just so funny to me #trixie was hugging in the script for all guests BUT katya #'we struggle to show affection' why is that written into the script for her and k's interactions? how will the audience interpret it? #'oh trixie hugs all her friends except for katya who she cant hug for some weird reason...' maybe any past history perhaps? #unadressed feelings? #but well... let them keep saying a lot with very little #this is a whole dissertation sorry lol

[astrxealis]

sometimes (often) i think about the characters i kin or relate to and then the realization comes in again and again that i need therapy (/lh?)

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #unfortunately i doubt i will ever get therapy bcs i have this. thing. idk. but i believe in myself to just rely on myself? #and yeah i uhh can go on more about that BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT OF THIS sorry i suck at explaining things. anyways #humans. interesting. i am fascinated by humans and myself and i'm tired of typing now GOODBYE anyways xiv music is so fucking good #and also idk how to interact w others sorry ..... i am scared of getting close to people bcs everyone i've grown close to has ended up #leaving me or i mess up! but tbh it's better now i think and also not as bad as i think but sorry i still have bad issues with. that #me saying i don't want to type anymore and then proceed to rapidly type out so many words oopsies #pls just do not PERCEIVE ME !! unless you want to ig but idk why you'd want to do that uhm #yk i like tumblr most out of all social medias bcs it feels like i can... sort of just be my weird self here! and it's not fully nice #and i still have anxiety problems and overthinking problems and whatnot which is evident by my 100+ notifs i havent checked since #christmas but that's not the point (?) idk whats the point honestly uhhhh nvm (??) #OH I LOVE FF SO MUCH tbh it's w/o a doubt still my favorite series ever but drake/nier is also up there for sure #which i think is amazing bcs i have yet to finish a game. and ive only like played idk 5 hours of replicant and automata #and then ive already spoiled myself on important aspects of all games but that helps ngl uh. i could explain but im tired of typing #ANYWAYS GOD actually noehgjbsejhbghjes i really suck w interacting w others i really wish i were better at all that #im not super introverted or shy im just kinda awkward and anxious but im a fun person and all and idk #and tbh its interesting thinking abt my personality... some parts of me havnt changed at all from a bit (/pos) like my lively. aspect of my #personality !! i was a bundle of energy and a little annoying (perhaps unintentionally but now i think its a bit more on purpose lol) #but the only person who really sees my true self is me. and the closest to that is lune. but even i dont know who i really am #and yeah... wnvr im like woa ill make more friends !! and then when i have the opportunities i suddenly dont care anymore IT SUCKS #anyways i think i have Opportunities now again so lets see haha ?? at least uhh in school. its like 2nd sem and i dont rlly have friends #as usual haha that sounds so sad help BUT its not like im disliked im just rlly quiet and shy at school..... throwback to 7th grade tho #that was rlly the worst but also now is just as bad in a diff sense but back then i cldnt talk w my crush at ALL i didnt speak at all im so #sorry about that HELPPP I RLLY JUST CLDNT SPEAK anyways moving on in my class rn i do have a group of sorts. like #we're grpmates wnvr theres grpworks and we can pick which is nice! ive been classmates w em all b4 and theyre the cool kids #but in the more fandom sense and one used to be a close friend of my twin and of mine too by extent and then the other was someone #who knew me when i was more extroverted so yeah uhhh anyways #OKAY ALMOST MAX TAGS im DONE rambling. bye. hopefully. bye. oh god

[mercuryislove]

despite not having a regular writing schedule for the past uh two months I'm still going to do nanowrimo once again but I can't pick which project to focus on

#for real in the past two months ive written like. 5k words total. if that. #i have not been doing well mentally. in fact you might say it's been pretty fucking bad lol #should i work on the weird western revenge plot ive been cooking up or perhaps the futuristic 'one last job' heist situation #or should i buckle down and do the sequel #OR since i decided on this while i was pathetic and weeping the other day: #should i rewrite the entire white crane with allllll the ten million changes ive made to the plot #since i had my little meltdown and almost blew my computer up in a fit of rage #it remains to be seen. but i have two weeks to decide or whatever i guess #oc talk

[dandyshucks]

this is not related to s.elfshipping at all other than dear god i would give anything to get a hug from Guz after all this but ,,,, apparently I do not attract ticks ??? (just rambling utc LMAO)

my sibling and mum both had multiple ticks on them but I somehow did not have any ??? my best guess is i have really low blood pressure and poor circulation, and I'm also an on a med that lowers my heartrate, so that maybe makes my body heat a bit less noticeable than regular ppls fjfkdl. i thoroughly checked over myself and all my clothes and bag (including all along the inside seams of my pants shfkdl) and my sibling checked in my hair for me so im just like,, i guess.... no ticks on me somehow. that's bonkers LMAO. also we're in Saskatchewan rn so there are no black-legged ticks around here (the kind that carry lyme disease), so even if I do somehow have one really well hidden on me I will be okay, thank fucking god !!!!

also i finally broke and cried today dbdjskl my sibling just hassled me abt something really minor and made me feel like shit and I just kind of cracked RIP, so theres my one allowed cry for this trip i guess dhfjdkl, feel a little embarrassed that that was the thing that finally did me in ^^;;

AND NOW we are back at campsite and going to just eat dinner and play yahtzee or smth w the grandparents before they leave tomorrow and then go to bed PHEW.

I want to do some drawing or something tonight hopefully,,,, i gotta draw some Guzbug stuff to calm tf down after today WHEW-EE !!!

#this is such a journal entry of a post sorry LOL im just like. scattered today idk #its been a day for sure nodding nodding #and i think perhaps someone is co-fronting w regular Juno so we're a little Weird rn. cannot figure all that out atm though #the place we visited was good though!! other than the crying and the ticks !!! glad we went :o) #i have so many lil guz photos to share once we get home !!!! very much looking forward to that !!! #dandy.cmd #umm we'll tag it with vent too maybe bc its sort of one i think fhfkdl i am so scattered augh #vent //

[icewindandboringhorror]

Daily Log 2

Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.

Activities: Much less than yesterday, felt sick and sleepy so barely got anything done. It was also warmer inside today.. Very much dreading summer. I still feel like the people who ~~ love warm weather sooo much~~ must also have central heating and air and are able to escape the warmth, or at least have cool airy houses where they can get cross breezes or something.. I just fail to see how ANYONE could enjoy sweating all day because it's like 75F indoors, etc. grrbb,,, the headaches, sleepless sweaty nights, constant physical discomfort, etc. The next few days look cloudy and rainy though so.. yEs.. haha HA

Got a new charger for my old 2004 nokia phone so it actually turns on now, and recorded myself going through the ringtones and games. I might add the footage to a currently not fully edited video of me also looking through other electronics (old phones, turbo twist math, etc.). I love old ringtones actually and if I were rich, I would love to collect old phones specifically just to have a catalogue of what they're like and all of the sounds they contain.

Managed to have a tiny burst of energy and take photos of 3 outfits before my arms and shoulder started hurting and I got too warm.

Sent email to one doctor.

Translated like 3 words for the Avirrekava poem thing I mentioned yesterday. My language document is not organized very well at all so I've kind of lost my flow of working on it. I've heard about people making searchable dictionary type things for their conlangs, so I'd like to look more into that maybe. As well as making a custom font, though I don't know if that's more difficult for syllabaries (so wouldn't be directly linkable to a plain english alphabet keyboard?? eh?). Anyway, I need to finish the tapestry/painting thing/etc. soon though since I have no good place to put it. The canvas is warping a little just laying haphazardly on my closet floor lol.

Made one quick mspaint background image for the next batch of song snippet things for my jokey music youtube.

Edited like 10 minutes of the Giant Worldbuilding Slideshow Project.. couldn't focus on that either since being at the computer today irritated my shoulders and arms.

Notable sights: Saw 6 baby ducks and their parents swimming in a nearby pond!! It's interesting how their colors seem to change so much, and the young ones have the little spots on their back. Not much else, I was not very active lol..

Goals moving forward: Still working on consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit pictures, post the poll adventure thing that has been sitting in a draft for weeks (I thought I would get it done today, but alas.. I don't even have to do much, just proofread and post it, I just keep having no energy/being preoccupied with other things/hurts to be on computer.. grrr.. I want to continue the story lol >:T).

Notable foods: HAD ASPARAGUS YEaaaaaghhhHHHH!!!!!!!!! Asparagus SQUAD!!!!!!!!!! ... Also a few pieces of smoked gouda with lunch, one of my favorite cheeses.

#just posting these publicly since it feels more like I'm doing something or easier to hold yourself accountable if you make public #declarations of goals and progress or etc. .. perhaps.. for now.. #I'm just curious to see if it helps. I know some poeple do diary style stuff or etc. on social media to help with productivity so #worth trying for like a week at least lol #tired and sleepy of being tired and sleepy though. Every day that stuff like chronic health problems or weather or etc. #interfere with me getting stuff done and it's all stuff that I've also had on my todo list for like.. weeks at this point it's like.. oughh #insurmountable tasks ever looming piling upon my shoulderes... #I've been 'supposed to call a lab to shedule blood work' for like a week and a half now and everyday I get the number #out and look at it and just go 'hmm.... sooon...' and then suddenly it's 10pm and I didn't #You Know How It Is Folks. I'm going to write myself a script of exactly what to say and also tape it to my computer screen #Sometimes that helps. lol #I dont' feel like I need a full on caretaker or something at this point but someitmes I do think like.. in a few years with my various #physical and mental issues it would be nice to have a Person Who Functions Normally Socially come visit me like once #every two weeks to help me plan things and make phone calls. Same with creative stuff too though. I bet I'd be doing something creative as #a career by now if I had like. an Assigned Neurotypical Extrovert to network for me and help me navigate things like that bjhbhj #hashtag hermit problems. etc. etc. (not just like 'a little weird and asocial' but like.. 'near complete inability to function in society' #type hermit problems lol.. #ANYWAY.. .. #Also fighting the urge to have another personality typing phase. I can feel it creeping up. My 'once every 3 months when I get very #interested in the enneagram and other stuff again' type of thing. distracting myself with worldbuilding paintings instead ghgj #why don't you do a phone call for your blood work first maybe then you can spend 3 hours reading about tritypes or whatever #I have so many interests and hobbies but a handful of Main Ones and they never go away I just seem to take turns with them #Except worldbuilding I think that's always there. Genuinely again.. wish I could find some way to work that into a career. that is the only #thing I could to 1000 hours straight at any time of day under any circumstance. Kidnap me and lock me in a basement and I will be passing #my time thinking about what type of cheese elves make and all the things I'm going to write once I escape captivity ghjhj #EVEYRHTING else though lol.. kind of comes and goes. but can be annoying when it's suddenly the only thing my mind #wants to focus on. BUT yeagh.. ANYWAY... rambling again #daily log