#or it was just a half-assed shitty ending man idk

[redr0sewrites]

Adam x Reader General Hcs

HAD TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR HIM HES JUST SO. AUGAHGEHEG. i love him. characterizing him is so fun, but so challenging at the same time.

🥀 Cw: adam being adam, sfw + nsfw hcs, smut, breeding kink

🥀minors dni with the nsfw portion

sfw:

Adam is more prone to casual flings and hookups, hes def not huge on relationships and longterm partners

this means that if your with him, you must be pretty special bc hes a huge ass handful

while he is a pretty big douche, adam is definitely loyal imo

deep down, hes still pretty insecure about both lilith and eve, and im a firm believer that he would never cheat on a partner if he was in a serious relationship

adam comes up with very.... interesting nicknames for you that are 10x more vulgar than the ones he uses for everyone else

hes HUGE on nicknames and petnames in general, at the start of a relationship theyre pretty crude and flirty but over time they start to become sweeter

sugartits, doll, sweet cheeks, bitch boy/babe, babycakes, BAE, lemondrop (idk it just fits), mama/mami, honeytits, honestly anything that comes to mind

adam likes to put "my" in front of most of your petnames, its not so much in a possessive way, moreso in a bragging way, he just loves telling the world that your HIS

he also definitely calls you bro, brah, dude, etc he doesn't care that it "doesnt sound romantic" 💀

adam finds the MOST unhinged things hilarious, hes the type to watch those ten hour long youtube videos of a spinning potato chip and laugh every ten seconds

speaking of, he has one of those loud, booming laughs with a slight wheeze to it

"BAAHAHAHAHAH BAE COME HERE LOOK AT THIS HAHA" and its just a low quality video of a water bottle falling over???

100% a shitty pickup line user

and also a shitty flirter in general

his flirting is just

obnoxious

adam is very proud of you, when the two of you officially got together he probably called half of heaven to announce that you two were dating

"THATS MY PARTNER‼️‼️‼️" type of vibes

adam acts like he isnt big on cuddles bit is secretly the clingiest, most touch starved person alive

PLEASE let him hold you, this man is tall af and loves just swallowing you in an embrace

when he was "courting" you (irritating you constantly and flirting with you obnoxiously until you caught on that he was serious) the biggest tell that his feelings were genuine was the amount of physical contact he initiated

adam was always leaning on you, throwing an arm over your shoulder, resting a hand on your thigh, hooking his arm through yours, overall invading your personal space

he was incredibly happy to FINALLY be able to cuddle with you when you both got together, and HAS to fall asleep touching you in some way every night

adam is almost always wearing his exterminator helmet, but he really likes it when you take it off for him at the end of the day. even he doesn't really understand why, but there's something so intimate to him about the fact that you love his real face more than the persona he puts on

he would rather die than admit it tho

hes not good at words or communication in general, and prefers to express his appreciation through actions

he brings you foods that he knows you like on days where you're especially busy, he gives you song recommendations that he'll think you'll like, he'll buy you a trinket he saw you eyeing at the store, just tiny things like that

adam genuinely does care about you, but as per his usual adam-ness, he would rather go bald than live up to that 💀

nsfw:

you cant tell me this man isnt kinky as shit

hes tried pretty much everything

HE LOVES TO HIT FROM THE BACK, DEF LIKES DOGGY STYLE

i also think he would like the mating press too, getting to watch your face as he wrecks you while also having the opportunity to leave bites all over your thighs, and feel them tremble as he fucks you? sign him up!

his dick is big big

i think hed be a little thicker than average, with a few veins running up the underside, but its his length that's downright heavenly

adam keeps himself pretty well groomed, but has a prominent happy trail and light fuzz at the very base of his cock

listen, this is the first man we're talking about, he KNOWS what hes doing

whether you're male or female, he will go down on you

once he buries himself between your thighs youre done for, adam barely comes up for air as he devours you

hes def sloppy w it too, loves when you cum on his face so he can lick it up

enjoys it when you return the favor as well, i actually think hed really realy like receiving head

would def fuck your face until your drooling

if you hve an oral fixation, you're in luck bc he LOVES watching you suck his dick, his fingers, anything really

adam always makes you lick and suck his fingers before fingering you, and will sometimes trigger your gag reflex by shoving them down your throat to watch you gasp and whine

adam has STAMINA, expect to stay up all night bc this man will stop at nothing to make sure you're both satisfied

i swear this man is built to breed, he has a HUGE breeding kink and goes crazy at the sight of his cum dripping from your hole. even if it's physically impossible for you to get pregnant, adam still babbles about "fucking a prety little babe" into you when he cums

adam likes using plugs to make sure his cum stays inside you, he'll also finger it back inside and loves smearing his cum on your thighs and ass

he also brings his fingers up to your face and has you lick the cum off of them

LOOOVEEEESSS marking you, by the end of the night youre always covered in bruises and scratches and hickeys galore

i love adam guys yes ik hes a douche but hes my douche <3

i wish i characterized him better but whateverrrrrr i dont want to write him as a total asshole but hes def not an angel either (haha im so funny💀)

#hazbin hotel adam #adam x reader #adam x you #adam smut #adam fluff #hazbin adam #hazbin hotel adam x reader #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel x reader #hasbin hotel #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel x y/n #lute #hazbin hotel #hazbin #i love him your honor #i could fix him

[marleyybluu]

Another Man's Treasure

Oscar Diaz x f!reader

Word count: 6.8k (I am so sorry lmao)

Warnings: 18+, shitty husband, smut, p in v, unprotected (but pls don't be this stupid), creampie, dirty talk, cheating (but is it really if your husband is an ass), flirting, fluff, love at first sight type shit, Spanish/English pet names (pretty lady, hermosa, cariño), limited use of y/n(I literally used it once) idk lmk if I missed any.

(I only mention the first song but the other two are more for the… spicy scene😏)

——

The only escape from reality you had was the small moments of disassociation you had between the screaming of your children and the-

"Are you fucking kidding me?!"

The shouting of your overgrown child of a husband playing his stupid games on his stupid PS5 that you wanted to set on fucking fire. This is not the life you pictured as a stay-at-home mom, yes the piles of dirty laundry were expected, and the mountainous dishes in the sink but you never predicted you'd be doing this alone. Your own mother stayed at home with you and your two brothers but your dad would still help her around the house so that she got the time to kick her feet up and relax.

You never got that.

You were living with this dark cloud over your head and deep regrets in your mind, why did you marry this man? You did think he was the love of your life, three years together before you got married proved your theory but never did you think it was going to end up like this. The amount of work you did was overwhelming, just one look at the number of toys on the floor made tears sting your eyes. You were tired, exhausted, drained and absolutely depleted.

If this was a job, you'd quit, you would take your children and quit. You wanted to so badly but the small hope of him changing clung to you like a piece of lint. You sighed holding your eleven-month-old on your hip while you made him a bottle, anything to keep him from wailing in your ears-- Jesus, half the time you couldn't hear.

"Babe!"

Your eyes rolled, you loathed his voice at this point. "What?"

"Can you pass me a water bottle?"

"Get up and get it, I'm making Malakai a bottle."

He groaned. "For fuck sake, you're in the kitchen already."

Your nostrils flared, and your eye twitched. You wanted to cuss at him, shout at him until your voice box shattered but you kept whatever calm you had left and ignored him. A small hand landed on your nose and you smiled kissing the tiny palm. "I love you too bubba."

He flashed a little smile and your heart sobbed at the fact that your last baby was growing so fast, teeth already emerging from his gums when just months ago he didn't have any. You could never regret your three little creatures, you loved them dearly, so much so you were willing to put up with the man that helped you create them just so they could have a two-parent household but you didn't know how much longer you could take this.

Heavy footsteps trailed inside the kitchen, you could tell he was angry at the fact that he had to pause his little game just to grab some water. He looked over the sink, utterly disgusted by the site in front of him and instead of just keeping his mouth shut or for once volunteering to do them he decided to spit out a sentence that made you want to knock his head off with the glass bottle you were holding; "You need to wash the dishes."

Your blood was boiling, if life was a cartoon you'd have steam coming out of your ears. "Why don't you get off of the game and do them?" You bit.

He cracked open the bottle cap. "Hey, I'm the one that works all week, you just stay home and do nothing."

Nothing? NOTHING!?

That was it.

That was the tip of the iceberg.

Your shoulders dropped and he left the kitchen, there was that ringing in your ears again that came and went every time you zoned out. Ever since you got married you'd felt nothing but unappreciated by him, you quit your job to stay home with your children and not even a thank you, you made sure he had a good meal when he went to work and all you got in return was an "it was okay." And the disgustingly dirty dish tossed right in the sink you'd just emptied. You were at the end of your rope.

You held back your tears and lightly kissed your son on his head handing him his bottle and putting him on a beam bag so he could lay down and drink. You trotted upstairs to check in on your oldest twins who were in their room colouring and getting along for once. Then you headed to the bathroom locking the door behind you, your body sliding down to the floor, you curled up in a ball burying your head between your knees you let out a long and heavy sigh before your river of tears took over.

A cry session your body and mind were so used to. You wailed into the void, muffling your weeps so that your children wouldn't hear you and come asking what was wrong, a question you couldn't answer without them turning on their father and you didn't want to ruin that relationship they had with him.

You were just so tired.

--

As night fell you remained mute when it came to your husband, whatever he had to say you didn't respond to, you were just happy that it was Sunday and soon he'd be out of your face for a few hours.

With the kids all asleep you were in the kitchen on FaceTime with your older brother. "The kids are great, they're sleeping." You conversed.

"And how have you been?"

There was no hiding how you felt when it came to your siblings, you were the baby and the only girl so when you were hurt they knew and they'd do whatever they could to fix it. "I'm okay... I'll be okay." You reassured. He was the only one who knew some small details about what you were going through and you begged him not to say anything not even to your mother until you figured out how to deal with everything yourself.

"Hey, listen, Jordyn is going on vacation next week, she's hitting Fiji, and I think you should go with her."

You squinched up your face, you didn't have a problem with your brother's wife, always so thankful for the sister you never got but what about your kids? Could you even trust that man to take over your duties even for a day?

As if he read your mind he continued. "I mean it'll be summer break next week, and they can stay by me if you want. I just, I really think you need time away from life. I want to see my little sister happy."

You pouted, it really touched your heart how concerned he was. A vacation would be wonderful, it was all you could dream of after the kids were born, you loved them but you just wanted to be by yourself.

"I'll think about it."

"Well, don't think too hard." He joked. "Whatever. I gotta get their lunches together, I'll call you when I make my decision."

"Sounds good, night."

"Night."

The call ended and you finished packing the twins' lunch placing the bags on the only empty spot on the counter. You huffed at the dishes and your husband's words replayed in your head. Nothing. You do absolutely nothing.

The longer you stared a vengeful plan began to brew. You were about to show him what doing nothing meant.

--

You decided you were going on that trip, Jordyn was excited and your brother was happy with your choice. The week flew by quickly, you kept up your normal appearance of keeping the house clean and to your husband's liking and by each day you grew more distant from him not like he cared in the first place.

On the last day of school you explained to the twins that you were taking a trip with Aunty Jordyn and they, unfortunately, couldn't come but they'd be staying with their uncle and they'd loved that man to death so they were excited either way. Your house was a mess and for once you smiled at it, you'd been letting everything pile up for the last two days, packing the clean clothes they did have in advance. The only explanation you gave your husband was that they were all staying by your brother for the week but you didn't mention that you weren't coming back.

You were leaving tonight and there would be no stopping you. You loaded the van with their stuff and yours and hollered for them to get their little butts in the car. "Last one in the car has stinky feet!" You laughed at the building volume of stomping feet coming across the hall and down the stairs, your twins were out and your youngest sat on your hip giggling at their antics. You happily wrote a short note.

Bye.

That's it.

You showered your baby in kisses and grabbed your keys before heading out the door, you locked it and made your way to the car, buckling in your baby and making sure the other two were in securely. You closed the door and first time in a long time you felt a weight off your shoulders, you smiled in satisfaction at how you left the house knowing you were not going to answer a single phone call from that man.

--

Jordyn squealed. "Ugh! I am so excited I don't even know what to do with myself!" You laughed at her enthusiasm as you put your hair up in a ponytail. It was day 2 of your trip and you were living life, you couldn't remember the last time you felt this relaxed. Now, of course, you missed your children it'd been the longest you'd ever been apart from them so you were a bit clingy with the calls but it was all understandable.

You two were hitting the beach today and you were a bit nervous, nobody had seen your body in almost a year not even your husband but Jordyn had persuaded you to find your behind in a two-piece bikini and you argued that you'd wear it as long as you could wear a cover-up so it was a deal. You looked yourself over in the mirror, you felt oddly confident. You looked fucking good. Three kids did your body right.

"You sure you want that cover-up?" She teased watching you admire yourself. "Hmm," You angled your lower half so you could check out your bum, how plump it had become over the years. "Maybe not."

She winked. "That's my girl."

You two grabbed what you needed and headed down to the beach which was right in front of the hotel you were staying at. The slight wind brushed against the water sending a cool and comforting breeze your way, your ears wiggled at the sound of the waves, and the giggles of other vacationers enjoying their time like you were.

The cushiony sand had greeted your toes after overflowing onto your sandals. You two travelled until you found a decent spot, it was close to the bar and the body of water. You set up your area as best as you could but you were in a battle with the beach umbrella Jordyn insisted on bringing. She watched with her hand covering her mouth to camouflage her laughter. "Okay, you know what, I'll handle this and you go handle us some drinks."

You childishly stuck out your tongue and strutted your way over to the bar, you hopped on an available stool. The bartender noticed you asking for you to just give him a minute. "No worries." You responded. You went on your phone and checked the many pictures your brother sent of your children, you smiled and a bit of sadness tugged at your heart. You missed your babies dearly.

The number of messages went up and it could only be one person. You promised you wouldn't look but you just had to, you swiped and tapped on your husband's name.

Where the fuck are you!?

The house is a fucking mess!

I'm not cleaning up, I hope you know that.

Baby, come on, we can work this out. Please.

You scoffed at the last message and put your phone down casually being greeted by the bartender who watched your various emotions while you went through your phone. "Everything's okay?"

Oh. Wow.

He presented a sweet smile, your eyes slightly widening at the sight in front of you. He was handsome, scratch that, he was fine as fuck. The shaved head didn't usually work on a lot of men but it did him justice, the scattered tattoos on his pretty and tanned skin, his broad shoulders that looked like they were made for legs to be hooked on and not to mention his big arms that looked like they could hold you snug and tight all through the night.

"Uh, yeah, everything's... everything is good." You stammered, a queasy feeling crept through you as it settled in your lower stomach. Butterflies? But you couldn't even remember what that felt like in order to come to that conclusion.

"Good to know. What can I get you, ma?"

You shuddered at his voice. He could talk to you all day.

"One Long Island, and one Piña Colada please."

He nodded. "Starting off slow I see." He chuckled. "Eh, we're on vacation, gotta soak it all up before we go back."

"I see," He multitasked making your drinks and conversing. "And when does the pretty lady go back?"

You blushed, should you even tell this literal stranger when you're actually leaving? But he felt... comfortable, easy to talk to and it's not like you'd ever see him again. "End of the week."

"Oh, you have plenty of time to get shit-faced." He encouraged. He'd finished your order and placed the liquored-down drinks in front of you. "Don't worry about paying yeah? It's on the house. Enjoy your vacation pretty lady."

"Y/n... you could just call me Y/n."

Not like you wanted him to, pretty lady was working just fine

"Nice to meet you. Oscar... Diaz." He winked. "Thanks, for the drinks."

"Anytime, pretty lady."

Your legs felt wonky as you walked away, and your breathing quickened. You did your best to walk back to Jordyn without looking back, if you did you were pretty sure you'd fall, just clumsy as fuck. "Girl, that man was watching you walk away." She whispered. "Stop." You poked, shoving her drink toward her. "Oh please, his eyes were on you." Jordyn gazed over to the bar, "He's still staring."

You casually whipped your head around and sucked your teeth when you noticed he wasn't. You glared at her. She snickered taking a sip from her Long Island. "Makes good drinks too."

You sighed, "Shut up."

The topic was silenced, you downed a few more drinks but sent Jordyn to get them instead while you swam around in the cooling water, floating around enjoying the peace the water brought you. But you couldn't help but occasionally look over to the bar. Oscar Diaz... nice name. Nice face. Cute little moustache that sat above his lips and a goatee that sat below. Pretty rosy pink lips...

Your eyes darted away. You're married.

Are you though?

You swam back up to the beach, it was beginning to get dark and the patrons on the beach became scarce. You wrapped yourself in a towel and collected anything Jordyn hadn't packed up yet. "You want one more drink before they close up? Maybe your new friend will allow it." She teased. You took off your flip-flop and threw it at her but your reaction only made her laugh.

A familiar voice was heard behind you. "So she's beautiful and she's got good aim, better watch out." 

You quietly gasped. "Hi... Oscar."

"Hey, uhm, listen I own a club not too far from here and you know it's a decent hangout for the locals... and the visitors." He winked. "Wanted to know if you two would like to come check it out?"

You fought back a smile. "We could try." You answer without even thinking. "I'll take that," He reached into his pocket handing you a folded piece of paper, you assumed had the address of the place he owned. Your fingers brushed against his, prickles felt like they were forming on your skin and those weird feelings returned in your lower stomach.

He sent you another wink and headed back off to the bar to close up.

--

Of course, Jordyn was down to go. You groaned internally as you two pulled up to a crowded place, looking up at the illuminated sign reading Cloud 9. Hmm, cute. You pulled down your dress as it rose up with each step, your heels clicking against the cold ground, the music booming so loud you could feel your body vibrating the closer you got to the entrance, flashing lights of different colours beamed through the door every time it opened blinding whoever entered. "Where's your friend?" Jordyn asked. "Have patience, I just told him we got here."

"Mhm." She sassed. Your heart thumped in your ears, it pounded against your chest. What were you doing? It was a question you asked yourself from the moment you got back to your room and began to get ready for tonight. You shook off your thoughts and shifted your eyes over to a black door that slowly began to open. "Hey, over here." Oscar waved you two over and you followed. "What's going on, pretty lady?... And pretty lady's friend."

Jordyn nodded at him as a silent greeting, she was just here to observe your anxious behaviour for her entertainment. "Come on," You followed him through a dimly lit hallway and up a flight of stairs, your nerves building and sudden regret forming in your bones until you entered a brighter atmosphere, the loud music returning to your eardrums. He had led you two to a section that only had a few people, you could assume it was the VIP section.

"Anything you two want to drink just let me know and I got you."

Jordyn raised her eyebrows at the tempting bottle of unopened champagne sitting in a bucket of ice. Oscar chuckled granting her permission to open it, she shimmied her shoulders in excitement and got to work. You shook your head at her, you travelled over to the balcony and looks down at all the patrons having the time of their lives, a few familiar faces from the resort and others that weren't recognizable which you could only assume were locals.

Oscar found his place beside you and nudged your shoulder with his. "You want anything to drink?"

"No, not yet, I'm good."

He slowly nodded. "So, what are you doing in Fiji? Besides vacationing."

You huffed, "I just needed time to myself... to get away from shit."

"I hear that." You could just feel those sweet and curious brown eyes boring into the side of your head, you poked the inside of your cheek with your tongue and looked down at your shoes, just anything to not make eye contact with him. You were shy, you were never shy not even with your husband when you first met him. It's like this was a new feeling, you were queasy and nervous and it honestly felt good in a weird way-- it felt good to not be comfortable, to get all flustered over someone like a schoolgirl crush.

"You really own this place?"

He scrunched up his face. "Half own, I guess. My brother and I came here for an escape just like you and we ended up staying. Now, we own Cloud Nine and I work down at the resort once in a while."

"Oh, you're a busy man."

"I try to be." Oscar chuckled. He was so easy to talk to, why was he so easy to talk to?

You found yourself moving a bit closer. "What were you trying to escape from?"

"Life. I wasn't happy where I was living and I wanted better but... given the circumstances, we just couldn't get it. So I threw a dart on a map, so to speak, it landed on Fiji and we've been here ever since."

"Where are you from then?"

"Originally born in Mexico, we moved to LA, and then out here."

"Would you ever go back to the States?" You asked finally looking up at him knowing he hadn't taken his eyes off you all night. He leaned forward, officially entering your bubble. "If I had a good enough reason... yeah."

You looked up at him through your lashes and softly smiled, meanwhile, Jordyn sat on the couch sipping and shaking her head at the sight in front of her. She would playfully scold you in the morning but tonight she'd let you have your harmless fun.

As the party went on you were getting a bit bored being upstairs so you grabbed your girl and headed downstairs to where the crowd was and of course Oscar was right behind you, he felt a sense of protection over you two tonight given this was your first time out here and inside his establishment. You had found enough confidence to start dancing around, a little two-step from left to right to get you going, but soon the constant flow of drinks Jordyn handed you helped you loosen out of that as well.

The DJ was beginning to play all the oldies, and that was your specialty. Oscar watched in adornment as you killed every lyric, every adlib and every beat to whichever song came on. It had transitioned from a bit of Hip-hop to something a lot slower.

  "Right now, we're gonna slow it down a bit, so grab your lovers and take your time."

The lights changed to blue and a recognizable first note had you close your eyes.

Mmm ooooh, my my my my my my my babyyy ouuuuuu

Jordyn had already found herself dancing with a random woman. She looked widened her eyes at you and quickly flicked them over to Oscar, trying her best to encourage you to make your move. But he was faster. You felt yourself being pulled into his warm embrace, his strong chest against your exposed back, his hands carefully snaking around your waist as if he was worried about you rejecting his touch but you gladly welcomed it.

Melting into his hold you two swayed side to side, he leaned down comfortably nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. You were lost in the vibes of Keith Sweat's Right and a Wrong Way. You reached back hooking your arm around his neck lightly scratching his scalp with your nails. "You smell so good, mamita." He whispered, it was a miracle that you heard him. Your lips parted slightly as you felt his warm breath tickle your skin. His swift hands ran up your sides resting right under your breasts and gliding back down to your hips.

A thumping began between your thighs, now that was something you hadn't felt in a long time. You put that feeling to the side no matter how hard it was to do so. The rest of the night it felt like all the songs were targeted for just you two, you hadn't eased up on him once-- always in close proximity to him. He touched you in simple ways, ways you hadn't been touched in almost a year.

It was getting super late, almost three in the morning and you couldn't recall the last time you were out like this, it'd give you hell when you woke up but it was worth it. You and Jordyn rode back to the resort with Oscar, she exited the car first thanking him for the night out and wobbling her way inside. You giggled watching her walk away, "I should get in there before she tries the key on the wrong room."

But you didn't want to leave him.

And he didn't want to leave you.

"Thanks for tonight, I had a lot of fun."

"No problem, anything to help a pretty lady escape." He bit his lip. "What are your plans for tomorrow?"

"Recovering," You laughed, "But other than that nothing."

"Can I see you again?"

You gulped and nodded. "Mhm."

He laid out his palm your eyebrows furrowed as you rested yours on top of his, he brought the back of your hand to his lips and placed such a gentle kiss on your skin. "Goodnight, mamita."

You wanted to scream. You left the car putting a little swing in your hips as you walked away, you looked over your shoulder and sent him a cute little wave before disappearing behind the doors.

— —

And that's how you spent the rest of your trip, shamelessly flirting with Oscar. You got to know each other a lot more, when you weren't spending time with Jordyn you were with him. Giggling like an airhead and blushing red like Rudolph's nose.

Jordyn constantly teases you about the crush you'd seem to quickly develop.

"Is this stupid?" You ask shoving your face in the pillow. This all felt too good to be fucking true, a guy that you met only four days ago was treating you so much better than the man you married four years ago. Oscar had flowers for you at the front desk of the resort every morning and sent you the sweetest messages throughout the day about how he was thinking of you, how he caught a glimpse of you today and you looked stunning, calling you the prettiest woman he'd ever seen step on this island.

You convinced yourself they were all lies, sugarcoating you like he probably did every woman but who were you fooling? Certainly not yourself and certainly not Jordyn.

"It's not."

"I'm married." You argued tiredly to which she fake yawned. "I don't see a ring on that finger and I don't see that man treating you any better than Oscar has. Just saying."

The fingers on your right hand brushed your vacant ring finger, you'd taken it off the minute you got on the plane, you didn't want to be reminded of him on this trip at all and yet there was that piece in the back of your mind that reached out to him. Checking his messages once in a while but never responding, he was giving you the attention you wanted but it didn't feel right.

The fact that you had to spontaneously leave to get even a fraction of what you were asking for was bullshit. Downright bullshit.

You groaned sitting up the pads of your fingers now rubbing your temples, tired and stressed. The trip was almost over and you dreaded going back to that house that was no longer a home. He'd sent you pictures that he'd finally cleaned up but you had a feeling once you returned home things would go back to the way they were and you did not want that.

"I think your brother would agree with me, you've smiled more in these past few days than I've seen back home, I mean you two are always so distant when you come over. And don't think I don't hear your rants when you and your brother are on the phone. Now I don't condone cheating but, hey, I didn't see shit."

You sighed checking your phone for any recent texts from your husband but Jordyn caught wind of what you were doing and snatched your device. "Enough with him. Flirt and have fun before you have to go back to normalcy."

You heard your phone buzz in her hand, she looked at the message for you. "Speaking of, someone is downstairs."

You felt nauseous. "Where are you two going anyway?"

"Down to the beach, said he has to restock the bar... and I wanted to spend time with him so I offered to help."

"Mhm." She winked. You grabbed your phone back from her grasp and told her you'd be back soon. You left your room, entered the elevator and headed downstairs where Oscar was happily waiting for you. "Hola querida." He become more comfortable speaking Spanish around you, especially when he noticed how the little nicknames got a reaction out of you.

"Hi," Oscar noticed the shaky tone in your response and made note of it You had comfortably slipped your hand inside his, he immediately hooked his fingers in the spaces of yours. Like he was your puzzle piece.

You two headed down to the decent-sized Hut, your eyes widened at the number of boxes sitting on the sand. "Don't worry, I got the heavy bottles, you just get the small ones." He reassured pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You loved those, so innocent and sweet, although you wish sometimes he'd kiss you on your lips or you had to courage to kiss his. "Think I can't handle the big boxes?" You scoffed walking inside after him.

"I think you can, I just don't think my pretty lady needs to."

My pretty lady.

ugh!

With music playing in the background you two got to work, "Do you still think about running your own restaurant?" You asked sparking a conversation, you squatted down to the lower shelves and propped the glass bottles in an organized fashion, eyes tearing through the material of your sundress and you could feel them. "I do, yeah. Why?"

You bit your lip. "Would it still be down here?"

There was a beat of silence. "Most likely."

Another pause in the moment aside from your soft humming to the music. "You excited to see your kids?" He asked. You smiled at the mere thought of them. "I am. My three little headaches." Oscar found himself next to you, leaning against the counter, you stopped your movements and looked up-- he had one arm folded over the other and a bit of a scowl on his face.

"What?" You innocently question standing up to match his eye line, well more-like chest line. "Nothing, just trying to take my time to remember this face." He reached for your cheek, his fingers ghosting your flesh. "You flirt like this with all the girls here?"

A question that was supposed to come out jokingly but you were a bit serious. "Nah," You squinted at him watching his lips press together, his chest stuttering as he held back a laugh. "You asshole, I knew it." A dramatic hand to your heart as you playfully pouted at him and fake cried. Oscar's arms enveloped you in their warmth, you attempted to push him off but it was no use, your feet suddenly off the ground, you squealed and giggled as he switched positions with you plopping you on top of the counter.

He placed his palms flat on the side of your thighs while he was positioned comfortably between them. "To be fair, hermosa, it is kind of my job. But believe me when I say I've never spent any time with them. And I've definitely never brought them back here after hours." His thumb and pointer finger pinching your chin. "Just you, princesa."

You melted, your whole body could be seen physically slumping in his hold. His eyes sparkled while he looked at you, the crinkles in his eyes appearing as he smirked. Before you could comprehend anything his lips brushed yours, your head suddenly becoming foggy with the inappropriate images of him that you'd conjured up these past few days.

His nimble fingers danced along the hem of your dress, a rush of heat passing over you as he hiked it up further exposing more of your flesh.

This was no longer a want... it was a need.

Your hands landed right under his jaw as you pulled him in crashing your lips onto his and he happily reciprocated your energy, his hands wandered up to your hips tugging you closer to him as if it were possible. Your lips moved as one, tongues passing by in the heat of the moment, the only thing on your mind was him and you wanted it to remain so for as long as possible.

Tingles scattered around your body, both of you flushed with lust and arousal. Your hands travelled to the bottom of his shirt quietly begging for him to take it off, you needed to feel his skin, thankfully he got the message-- pulling away for a brief moment to remove his top. Your eyes glazed over his lightly tanned skin, little scars here and there you can only presume he earned before he got here.

You smiled at the strewed ink on his torso, chest and ribs. "What are you thinking about?" He inquired. You looked back up into his brown iris'. "I wish I had met you first." You mumbled drawing him back down, this kiss was a lot more passionate and slow unlike the first.

Oscar's hands gently tugged at the neckline of your dress, your breasts spilling over and his calloused hands finding them. You softly moaned against his lips, your nipples hardening from the cool breeze and his fondling. He pinched and rolled them between his fingers, your head tipped back and his teeth nipped at the column of your neck.

You were forming a small pool in your panties at his teasing. His tongue grazed your neck continuously licking and sucking a specific spot that was getting a squirming reaction out of you. You felt his devilish smile, he knew what he was doing to you and he liked it.

His hands moved from torturing your swollen breasts back down to your thighs shoving your dress up until your little black panties were on display. You sat on the edge of the counter making it a bit easier for him to remove them, the cool air hitting your soaking slit.

"Touch me, please, touch me." You whined not caring about how desperate and needy you sounded. Oscar listened to your pleas and dipped one hand between your legs, his fingers quickly finding your slick folds. You shuddered as he glided two fingers up and down, dipping them inside you once in a while.

You were soaking, you were throbbing, and you just wanted him inside you where he fucking belonged. He slowly plunged his fingers inside, you clench around them happy to have something pleasuring you. Your eyes are closed and your legs spread further for him, nails digging into his shoulder blade hopefully leaving little indents.

He pumped them in and out of you with the squidgy noise of your wetness to follow. "Yes... oh yes, like that."

Oscar felt himself twitch under his boxers using his other hand to undo his belt and pulled down his materials. His dick is hard and his tip a rosy pink turning cherry red oozing with a bit of cream, his hips buckled once his hand brushed over it-- equally as desperate as you were. Your erotic moans were like music to his ears, so much sexier than he could've pictured. You whined once he removed them your hole flexing around nothing as you caught your breath.

Oscar hooked your legs over his arms spreading you to his desire, you reached between your bodies firmly (but not too tight) grasping his length and guiding it to your entrance, his swollen head prodding inside you as the rest of him followed.

Your jaw slacked at the feeling of him deliciously stretching you out, he was so thick and it felt so nice. Oscar croaked out a moan while burying himself deep inside your warmth-- coating his dick with your sticky walls, so slick and welcoming that he didn't want to move.

You caressed the back of his neck as he pressed another kiss on yours, trailing it up the side and finally landing on your mouth. You giggled into the kiss, Oscar pulled back with a questioning look. "I can't tell the last time I felt like this." You mumbled under your breath but he heard you. He didn't want you to leave, hell if you didn't have kids he'd probably try to convince you to move out here with him.

He didn't say anything in response just pulled out and pushed back in. "Fuck." You both moaned.

His head dipped back down, nibbling on your sweet skin.

You whimpered through every tantalizing stroke he gave you, his tip poking right at your hot spot and you knew you wouldn't last. "You feel so good!" A sentence broken by little gasps. Oscar grunted, violently gripping your thighs as he pounded you, pulling the filthiest sounds from your pretty little throat. So loud and erotic he was sure they could hear you back at the resort.

Your eyes squeeze in absolute bliss, your head hazy from the constant pleasure you received, quickly feeling a sensation in your lower belly a wave of heat threatening to take over. Your palm lay flat on his back while the other gripped the edge of the counter.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck! Oscar!"

He lifted you off the counter a bit, relentlessly slamming into you now. Your high getting closer and closer. "I can, shit, I can feel you mamita. So fucking tight."

Your toes curled and your eyes rolled. "Baby, ohhh, I need to..."

Oscar smiled. "You wanna cum for me, baby? Come, mi amor, all of it."

His words tipped you off the edge, your back arched and your body trembled from the shockwaves of your orgasm, he held you closely revelling in your pulsating pussy dripping down his shaft.

He quickly brought you off the countertop, your wobbly legs barely holding your support. He turned you around, you barely recovered from the first position.

You were sensitive and extra wet just how he wanted you. You flinched when he pressed himself against your entrance once again, pushing in ever so carefully. "Fuck... you."

He laughed menacingly, his hands squeezing your hips. "That's what I'm doin' pretty lady."

You wanted to give him a smart-ass answer but it was cut short when he began to move. Your nipples were hard against the surface, you rested your head down and whined. "So fucking good."

"Yeah?" He chuckled spanking you. He was enjoying the pornographic sounds that you provided, all going straight to his dick.

He wrapped his arm around your waist pulling you up against him, back pressed on his chest, his warm breath in your ear. "Can't get enough of you I swear." He admitted.

He poked and prodded against that familiar spot, tears of overwhelming pleasure threatening to spill when he pinched your nipple. "Fuck! I'm gonna miss you, so fucking much."

"You gonna think about me?"

"Yes! Oh!"

You felt him twitch inside you, you smiled egging him on. "I won't stop thinking about you, when I touch myself I'll picture it's you-"

"Fuck, cariño,"

"Ou, you're the only one I want inside me."

You convulsed around him feeling another orgasm quickly building and getting ready to fall apart. A few more thrusts and Oscar held himself still inside you, your body shivering at the warm cream he just spilled inside you. His high triggering yours. You reached behind hooking your arm around his now sweaty neck.

The sound of the wind against the water and the waves crashing describe exactly how you felt right now.

"Oh... my god." You said breathlessly.

"You're okay?" He asked with a laugh. You giggled tipping your head back on to his shoulder. "Better than okay."

He sighed kissing your back. "I meant it..." You said.

"What?"

"I'm gonna miss you."

He smiled sheepishly. "I'll miss you too."

--

Those moments replayed in your head constantly, it was the only thing getting you by once you came back home. You two still talked every day, called and FaceTimed but it wasn't enough. You would stare at the prices of tickets and sigh, you couldn't afford to go back right now.

Your life was the same, unloved and unappreciated, despite the embarrassingly desperate messages your husband had sent when you were on your trip. You stared at another pile of dishes, your shoulder sinking with exhaustion. With your two older ones at school and your son almost an hour into his nap you decided to just relax. You clicked on Netflix and attempted to finish Bridgerton's, Queen Charlotte.

Your eyelids felt heavy, sleep threatened to take over but the doorbell had them shoot open. It wasn't just one ring it was multiple and it was annoying so you assumed it was your brother. You groaned trudging to the door. You swung it open aggressively, ready to give him a piece of your mind. "You're going to wake-"

There he was. Standing in front of you, on your doorstep... at your house. "O-Oscar..." You poked his chest to see if he was really there. "Said I'd come back when I have a good reason." Your eyes softened, your arms reaching for him. His lips immediately find yours. "I," kiss, "fucking," kiss "missed you."

Your legs wrapped around his waist as he stepped inside closing the door. He carried you over to the couch and plopped you on the cushions. You laughed, your mood immediately changing with him around. "Jordyn told you where I lived didn't she?"

He nodded. You rolled your eyes. "Of course."

"Not happy to see me?"

You pulled him down for another kiss.

"Beyond happy."

I was going to wait until the weekend to post this but I am a little too excited to get this out.

Shoutout to my girl @darqchilddaydreamz for her input on a few things and her encouragement. Holdin it down ✊🏾

if you liked this fic feel free to like this fic, comments and reblogs are appreciated.

Alsooooo thank you for 800 followers, yall cool as fuck thanks for fucking with me and my antics.

Peace and love see you in the next one✌🏾

🏷: @darqchilddaydreamz @skyesthebomb @realhotgurlshit

#Spotify #oscar diaz #spooky #spooky x reader #oscar diaz x fem!reader #spooky fanfic #spooky fanfiction #on my block fanfic #on my block #on my block fanfiction #smut #oscar diaz smut #marleywrites #marleysfanfictions

[irisintheafterglow]

some bonus hcs about dating volleyball captain!gojo while i finish up the next few parts of end game. hope you enjoyy !!

his lockscreen is of you sitting on his bed wearing one of his jerseys with no pants on

he'd just made you laugh really hard and it's a candid of you smiling

your lockscreen is of him standing in front of a tree that had "penis <3" carved into it with his thumb up

you'd literally teared up laughing when he begged you to take a photo of him with it

his homescreen is of you trying to wrangle megumi and yuuji to take a proper photo without getting distracted (the photo, therefore, being them getting distracted)

your homescreen is a mirror picture taken after you'd run around in the rain and were both soaking wet

he's holding you from behind and burying his face in your neck while you take the photo

if he wasn't protective of you before, he is the definition of protective now that you were officially together

other players that dare to hit on you before a match are humiliated by the honored one beating them at barely half of his full power

he'd blow you a kiss and then serve straight into the net because he's stupid <3

he likes to leave little notes in your pocket with the most OBSCENE things written in them and you have no idea how they got there

"your ass looks incredible today"

"call me mater because i want you"

"kachow i want you NOW"

he goes absolutely FERAL when you wear his clothes, especially his volleyball gear

doesn't matter if it's a jersey or his track jacket or a worn out tee-shirt from training camp

"you look better in that than i do, baby"

"though i do admit you'd look better in nothing at all"

you could wear his SOCKS and he'd get all giddy

if you're wearing it and it's not yours to begin with, he's a smug motherfucker

would unironically get you two those lego piece necklaces that create a heart in the colors of the school (i was thinking black and purple)

he always has to be touching you

doesn't matter the place or the time or the scenario

whether you like it or not, a part of this man's body will always be on yours

leaning against your shoulder, linking a single pinky with yours, touching your thigh with his under the table

it grounds him and reminds him that he's not alone

he love love loves it when you fiddle with his hands

you're laying down together with his arms around your shoulders looking up at the ceiling you'll trace the lines of his palms with your fingers and play with his hands and he literally melts

he's incredibly adamant to mention to eVERYONE that he has a partner including but not limited to: cheerleaders, fangirls, classmates, girls' team players, and other boys' team players (man can pull idk what to tell you)

at all times just

"i have a partner."

"sorry, i'm taken."

"i'm not single."

"i don't want you."

he'd never dream of giving up a love like yours because you see him just as satoru

not the powerhouse captain set to lead your school into its second volleyball golden age

just your best friend first then boyfriend satoru

whose bloodstream probably contains sugary green apple soda that you taste whenever he kisses you

"i taste that shitty fruity energy drink on your tongue again"

"so you admit you like my tongue"

"i just called it shitty, satoru"

"i'll start drinking a different flavor then, and you tell me which one you like"

he still doesn't convince you to call him captain

yet ;)

#gojo x reader #gojo x you #jjk x you #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #jujutsu kaisen #suguru geto #satoru gojo #jjk volleyball au #gojo hcs #jjk hcs

[the-owl-house-takes]

I hate what they did to Alador in the show. That man was an active abuser in his kids' lives (I'll focus on Amity on this ask since she's the main one between the three that we see), and they completely ignored it after the first season

In Understanding Willow, Alador is actively helping intimidate and coerce Amity into breaking up her friendship with Willow. That's literally shown on-screen, no way around it, he was intimidating his ~5-6 year-old and threatening her friend in order to get her to obey

In Escaping Expulsion, he's not as "active", but he still follows Odalia along, both while putting Amity to work and "fight" against abominations (which even if it wasn't real, there's there's way it's safe for a child), and while expelling his daughter's friends. Don't come and excuse it saying he was being corced or forced into doing so. He steps up against Odalia by the end of the episode, when she wants to expell Luz, Gus and Willow again. And guess what? He only intervened because having Amity be on their side would be convenient. So far he has been seen actively abusing and exploiting his 14 year-old daughter

Then Reaching Out. First, I wanna say that I hate that they removed those storyboards of Alador saying Amity wouldn't leave the house again without an abomination, which once again puts to light how he was an abuser. Not "just" complicit and neglectful, but purposefully an abuser, taking away his child's freedom and privacy as punishment. By the end of the episode though, we get that little shitty scene of him and Amity talking, Amity saying he doesn't pay attention to her or the twins anymore. Which... doesn't even scratch the surface of all he has done ON-SCREEN to her (and presumably the twins too). This whole scene sucks, and they try to make up a little by having her reject the hug, which was nice to see, but it doesn't make me any less annoyed with how they treated the situation. Oh, and I forgot about the twins in this episode, didn't I? But I suppose it's fine, since Alador forgot about them too, apparently

Then of course, Clouds on the Horizon, where Alador magically grows a spine and tells Odalia that abusing their children and cooperating on a genocide is bad and I guess gets a divorce idk their parts of the episode kinda sucked. And then, he leaves the scene with Amity and... oh right, he forgot he has two other children again, and let them be locked up by their abusive mother on God knows where and under "maximum security". Nice!

Anyway, we don't get much Alador focus from here on. My final verdict, he's a terribly written character with a half-assed "redemption" they threw in last second after ig realizing they needed a decent parental figure for the Blight kids by the end of the show. He had abused, exploited and neglected his kids - not even acknowledging two of them during the whole show - and all that got swept under the rug after shaking hands with Amity. Kinda amazes me when I remember Dana said he was an interesting character to write because he's just. A bad character. Not even a "love to hate" type of character, just... bad

And you can argue that hating Odalia and loving Alador isn't just misogyny, but... really? The fandom collectively hating Odalia but most people adoring Alador since his first appearance and constantly ignoring his abusive behaviors towards their children isn't just misogyny? I'm obviously not saying we should like Odalia, but Alador should get just as much hate. Honestly, I hate him even more for how he got away with it so easily

Anyway. Next time I'm coming with an essay about Emira and how the show and fandom treat(ed) her poorly in comparison to Edric

-

#the owl house #toh #character hate #toh critical #long post

[jerzwriter]

You are so fucking disgusting Elsa. Using your bland ass straight white bitch MC to be the MC of the Month for Pride Month.

You’ve gone really low

Good morning, Nonny.

I'd like to say hope you're having a good day, but clearly, you're not.

I was 50/50 on putting this in my "delete because Nonny is a bitter troll who doesn't deserve the attention/exposure they desperately crave" file. But this anon goes beyond the usual "I'm a pathetic human who hates someone on the internet who has zero impact on my life so much because of (insert stupid/insane reason here), so I'm going to be a vile bully and send them anonymous hate because - IDK - I can't find a good therapist? I'm off my meds? I'm just a vile piece of shit?" See, I no longer waste my time or energy on those.

But I decided to answer this because a) you're wrong, and b) you're engaging in bi-erasure - something that happens in the fandom and in real life every day, and I'm not going to pass up a chance to educate your ignorance and address your bigotry.

Casey was picked at random - the same way all MCOTMs and WOTMs are. I grappled with the decision to highlight her bisexuality... because of people like you. In the end, I decided to be true to the character. I've been dealing with people like you my entire life - in my personal life - never mind fandom. So let's educate.

Bisexuality is real - people.

Your ignorance in understanding it doesn't make it any less real. I am proudly bi, but trust me, it feels like a pretty shitty thing to be at times. You're never queer enough for many in the queer community, but you're too queer for those who aren't. There is no real safe space outside of a precious few who get it. And I mean few.

Your straight friends talk shit about you "doing this" to be "cool/get attention" or whatever... and they're "relieved" when you're in a hetero-presenting relationship. Your queer friends are happiest when you're with a same-sex partner, and if you're not, they accuse you of lying about who you are or "hiding." It's awesome. You know, instead of just having friends that are fucking happy if you're happy. People CAN BE and ARE attracted to more than one gender and the feelings/love we have toward both are real, valid and do not have to be explained to anyone.

Anyone who follows my MC (and I don't believe Nonny has) knows that Casey has been presented as bisexual from the day I entered this fandom. If some choose to ignore that, that's on them, not me. The fact that she is half of a pairing that is hetero-presenting does not make her any less bisexual. How ignorant are you?

Her profile clearly states she's bi. I've written about her being an activist for LGBTQ rights and about her reluctance about coming out to her parents (because she doesn't believe she should have to "come out," why is straight the default?). I've introduced her ex-girlfriend, Jessica, in fics and text fics, and discussed Casey's identity at length in numerous asks over the years.

So, yes, her current partner is a man, and he ends up being the love of her life. GUESS WHAT! THAT HAPPENS TO BI PEOPLE! And, TRUST, we know the privilege that comes with being in a hetero-presenting relationship. I've never once had someone throw something at me or hurl slurs when I've held a male partner's hand in public, but I've had it happen when my partner is a woman. But no one bi is "suddenly straight" because of it! And asking us to parade as hetero just because we're with an opposite-sex partner is pushing us into a closet - and I'm sorry, but fuck you - because no one belongs there.

Last June, I deliberately avoided all pride-related events in the fandom (NOT in real life). I did so because I was coping with the guilt that is tantamount to being bisexual. The "Should I put it out there. I mean, there are others who are more queer, right? I have no right to do this? Their characters are more important than mine, right?" And yeah, I've felt that way in real life, too. THIS is what it's like being bi. I'm out for decades, I'm comfortable and proud of who I am, I counsel younger people in the community that they are valid - and I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes right now because with all of that, THIS SHIT STILL CREEPS IN - largely because of s-bags like this Nonny.

So you know what, I'm not grappling with it anymore. It's pride month, and in real life, I'm celebrating to the fucking max. And you know what - I'm doing it in the fandom too. Casey is going to be as out and fucking proud as I want her to be, and if it makes your ass uncomfortable, well, that's not my fucking problem.

Re-read your ask, Nonny. The only disgusting person in this exchange is you. Do fucking better.

#playchoices #choices fandom #bisexuality awareness #bi erasure #hate anons #open heart choices #do fucking better #your ignorance is showing #pride

[alternativememories]

both sides...

i have a friend who has sucked for a while now. i've been thinking about writing about it for a minute but i've been putting it off like everything with our friendship lately...but part of who i want to be is someone that shows up, even when things fucking suck, and i can't waste any more time. i know what i've got to do and it's time to rip the band-aid off. our friendship is over and i've gotta be real about it.

i'm fucking sad, man. i see him as a younger brother. so much of how we see things and approach things is similar to one another. the ways that he has sucked for some time are really similar to how i struggled when i was younger. he had a breakup recently, which in the big picture i thought would actually end up being good for him. i think both he and his ex have stuff that they need to work on individually and that this would be a good opportunity for him to get himself squared away.

but the spiral continues. the last time i saw him we talked about where he was with things and where he's headed and it was mostly half-assed excuses. it's apparent that he's not showing up for himself, let alone anyone else for that matter. he smokes, which has kept him comfortable in the cycle of not showing up in any meaningful way, and he lacks accountability. he's living with his parents right now and it seems like they're enabling his behavior.

it's shitty. we lived together up until the end of october and to be honest it was toxic as fuck. it came down to money and cleaning. in moving in, we agreed to not have his now-ex on the lease to keep things simple in case they ended up not working out as a couple. however, when she ended up staying at the apartment more than A and i and we wanted her to pay toward the bills, it was an issue *eye roll*. initially, the conversation about contributing was shut down bc homie talked to other roommate and he supposedly said that he didn't care if she paid and that was the end of it...(we'll revisit this)

at one point during this conflict, there was a text about wanting to be friends after the lease would end...i've thought a lot about that since. it took me some time to figure out why i couldn't help but fixate on it, but with where we are now i think i know the answer. the statement operates through an inherent assumption that how things were handled was damaging to our friendship. to be honest, it was. the bills conflict was infuriating bc the argument against contributing was school loan payments being high; meanwhile in watching behavior they ate out all the time. and you know, everyone has bills. but not everyone takes advantage of their friends to pay theirs.

with the cleaning thing, it became clear that he was frustrated by the cleanliness of the apartment but never communicated what those expectations even were. eventually we landed on a chore-board. but this wasn't without its problems bc it just led to them not being accountable for their share of the chores; beyond that, there was noticeable passive-aggressiveness toward the other roommate who tbh idk if he ever even agreed to in the first place. weird to someone to a standard they never agreed to but maybe that's just me...

when he and his ex broke up he told me a very specific story of what led to the fracture. i want to say that i found the specificity odd but dismissed it bc i was excited to have my friend back. when they were dating he was very reclusive and we were barely friends anymore. truthfully, we moved here in a pandemic and while i have loads of coworkers, he's really been my only friend here...but a few weeks ago i found out that it looks like he's lied about those specifics of the story that he told me, knowing that it fundamentally changes the reaction. it's manipulative.

in thinking about it, i've really tried to explain away or excuse the poor behavior...but to be honest, it's inexcusable and with what he's lied about, there's no recourse here...there's no way to police the behavior, and with him lying about it, no way to trust anything he says that it's even stopped. now i'm wondering what else he's lied about to get what he wants. the first thing that comes to mind is the bills conversation. it's a fundamental breach of trust and i don't think our friendship can be repaired. it fucking sucks and this fucking sucks but it is what it is...because he sucks.

#2024

[minijenn]

Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: The Boss Baby

(I could not for the life of me find actual promo art for this stupid fucking movie anyway). Boss Baby is bad. Wow, Jen, what a shocking revelation! Who could have guessed? Yeah, I could have. Cause this movie sucks. Let's get into all the many, many reasons why.

Seven year old Tim lives a perfect life with his loving parents, until the arrival of the Boss Baby, who acts like a normal baby around adults, but in reality, he's actually a corperate suit who works for Baby Corp, which is where all babies come from. A rivalry ensues between Tim and the baby, until they're forced to work together to foil a plot to stop puppies from overtaking parents' love for babies. Or something like that, idk this movie's plot is fucking weird.

So yeah, weird ass story that just... has really fucky pacing? Like this movie drags on man, it drags on SO long to the point that I felt like it was never going to end. We get to the climax and there's still like 20 minutes left in the movie??? Bro, stop padding this damn thing out. Nobody wants to sit through this fuckass movie for that long???

Our characters are all pretty lame. Tim is a typical annoying kid with an overactive imagination, there really isn't a lot to him. Boss Baby is as about as annoying as you'd expect a baby playing off white collar worker stereotypes to be. The parents are barely characters, same for Boss Baby's little crew. The villain is also the same old upstaged petty jealous bitch who wants their glory days back. Dreamworks, you just fucking did this trope. In fact their past three movies have had this trope (Dave, Kai, and Chef).

The humor in this is expectedly lame and childish. Because there's such a large focus on babies, you can expect lots of poop and vomit jokes, which I am absolutely not a fan of. When the humor isn't that its just "oh look at this cute baby saying he wants a latte and talking about stocks! Isn't that FUNNY? LAUGH, PLEASE WE"RE BEGGING YOU!" And it's trying so hard, both to be funny and to wring out genuine emotions and I think it almost manages to do the latter near the end, but even then it all comes across as nothing more than pandering and tryhard. Like I already don't like these characters, movie. What makes you think I'm compelled to feel anything about them?

The animation is... oy. A mess? The character designs are just bad, man. They look like something out of a shitty mobile game ad, with those massive uncanny valley eyes that take up half their face. The movie is agressively colorful, and while I praised something like that in Trolls, I can't say the same here. It's just too... hyperactive for me? Like there's lots of imagination sequences sprinkled throughout the film and you can tell they're trying to be stylized ala Kung Fu Panda, but there's always just too much going on on screen and it kind of hurts to look at? Like fuck, movie, calm down. You are way too overstimulating right now and my eyes are starting to goddamn ache just looking at you.

The one thing I didn't hate about this movie I suppose was the music. They could have easily littered the soundtrack with shitty pop songs, but they surprisingly held back. The score is also fairly nice to listen to, should have been in a better movie than goddamn Boss Baby, that's for sure.

There's also the fact that this movie's lore is just... a confusing mess? I get that this is for kids, but like? It takes itself seriously, so why am I still so confused about where babies come from in this universe. Are they concieved through Sex? Or are they made in a factory or something? Like what the fuck am I supposed to think, movie? Make it make fucking sense, please.

So yeah, I didn't like this one. I think Dreamworks was trying to make a kids' movie that could also appeal to adults here, but in the end, they made a movie that appeals to absolutely no one. Sure, I suppose it has its fans, who are likely just dumb kids who are too stupid to know they're being pandered to, but I am certainly not one of them. Fuckass movie, fucking hated it. Get it out of my face. Now.

Overall Rating: 2/10

Verdict: (takes out a gun and cocks it at Boss Baby) You're fired, kiddo

Previous Review (Trolls)

Next Review (Captain Underpants: The Epic First Movie)

#jen watches #dreamworks watch #jen tortures herself with every dreamworks animated movie ever #the boss baby #dreamworks

[bunnyb34r]

I got snaaaacks 🍿🥤

Not as expensive as I thought like $10 for a small popcorn and small icee, but that's more than the price of a matinee so yknow 🤷‍♀️

Was very good though sgdgdgd think I'll do the order ahead pick up in theater thing if I get snacks again, but I only ate like half the bag agdgdggd big ass bag for a small and tiiiiiny cup for a small icee

Anyway the movie was really good! I forgot spiderman is marvel though 😬 but I used my movie credit so I didn't pay for it. Still though...

Anyway really liked it, really liked the casting and story. Didn't end the way I thought it would tbh. I'll put my spoilers under the cut. Sat second farthest row back bc getting snacks took so long that the end seats were already taken in the row I picked and I didnt wanna make someone get up especially when the theater was so sparsely filled anyway like it's not REALLY assigned seating (unless you order stuff to your seat)

But! I could see the screen a lot better and I didn't need my ear plugs even with it being a loud action movie so that's a plus! Fun little trip all around :)

Oh! And guess what trailer was playing when I came in. Guess. :)

Imaginary. I fucking hate those trailers 😭 stop making me see Chauncey 😭 hes not even cute!! And Alice sobbing at the end makes me saaaaad having seen the other trailer

AND Tarot looks really fucking good even if I haaaate horror movies. Like the premise that whatever card you picked is responsible for your death (I think that's it, I'll have to look it up) is really cool (couldnt help but think of stardust crusaders 😅 I'm like 👀 what does the Hierophant do? 👀 like we saw the hermit, the high priestess, the hanged man (kinda??) Like what else... let me see without watching the whole movie and being paranoid for a week like horror always makes me 😭) anyway I think it's the first 12 cards and 13, death, was the last one tying their fate I THINK. Anyway idk if I'll see that 😬 but it's funny bc I remember when Ouija came out I tried to convince my friends to skip school with me and go see it but no ones parents would let them call out sick but mine sgdggdgd my mom was like whatever just let me know if your friends take you to the movies (they did not.) Anyway I picked that bc it looked cool and they liked horror, and I think this is the same "franchise" same director

The creepy rhyme of the rules was cool sgdgdgd

Spoilers for Madame Web under the cut ⬇️

So it's a prequel to spiderman! I didn't know that! We got to see Uncle Ben becoming Uncle Ben, and he didn't just have like a short cameo like he was apart of the story which was cool, I liked that.

The "hints" that theres gonna be more involving her and the girls looks cool. Maybe I'll see em when marvel stops being shitty fuckers. (So likely online... for free. (; )

I wish Ezekiel didn't die in the end (he's super super dead lol) bc he was a cool villain! I really liked his character and he had a lot of potential! I wonder if that's gonna play a part in the upcoming series, like if he's somehow alive again (probably not). I might look up free scans of the comics later bc I really like Julia, shes so cute agdgdgd I mean I like them all but I like Julia's spider-sona the best

I liked the overall idea and plot, though the Las Arachas (I think that's how you spell it) scared the fucking shit out of me sgdgdgdggdgd I was like oh that's a cool legend, wonder if it's real. Have to look that up later. OH SHIT

Also glad they didn't kill the mom, I thought they did bc they didnt even like move Cassie closer when her mom was reaching for her??? Hello??? Asshole??

Also shout out to customer who called in the girl's sighting, even though it led Ezekiel to them, way to not be a bystander 🤙

Also nitpicky thing but I wish Cassie had given the girls a count when she taught them CPR, I remember we needed to count (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4... or something) over and over when we learned it, or tell them to use the beat of Staying Alive (could've easily gotten the rights... then make a joke ab them not knowing that song bc haha Cassie old)

Mainly just wish they didnt kill him, like that would have been such a good "oh I'll be back. Just you wait" type villian! I mean I get it, he would stop at nothing to kill em but like come ooon

Anyway highly recommend seeing this... online ;] ;) bc marvel is shit

#marquilla #im gonna shower and then ill look up the tarot movie bc if i do it first im gonna be paranoid and need bosha to get his steel chair and he #is on break from that sgdgdgdgd #(to combat my usually self-induced paranoia that i get from horror shit i mentally have my stuffed bear Bosha smash em #with a steel chair like it's the wwe and he's smashing whatever im paranoid ab with a chair and that makes me feel better)

[this-is-krikkit]

Top 5 queer characters

ooooh good one, thank you !!

5. Frankie Bergstein. The most gentle soul out there, hilarious whether she wants to be or not, an incredibly loving and warm character who ends up falling in love with a woman who's shown her nothing but disdain most of their lives before they end up in the same shitty situation. What i especially love about her is that in my headcanon where that show didn't queerbait us to death, she's the bold and crazy one who doesn't care about other people's opinion, she's the one you'd expect to be brave and loud and clear about how she's in love with her best friend and it's not just platonic. But i actually love the idea that she might be the one struggling most with that realization and how to act on it, because she used to be so open and loving of everything and everyone (and still seems that way) for the seven decades before the show starts ; and she got her heart broken so badly from the twenty year old affair, that although she did get attached to Grace quickly enough and jokes about being more than friends all the time, she's deadly afraid of those feelings and what may come of them. I absolutely love this strong and funny and silly woman on the outside, who hides a much more vulnerable and frightened woman on the inside, who deserves all the lifetime of love and affection Grace has never allowed herself to feel or show anyone.. until now, post-canon !!

4. Crawley, my actual demon child, who is way too good for this world, and the other two he's visited. (And i've been torturing myself for a solid half hour trying to pick between him and his equally amazing boyfriend Aziraphale, and ended up flipping a coin for it. I'm sorry Aziraphale. I love you so much.) Anyways, back to Crawley and his ridiculous crush on an angel that makes him do crazy things such as going to actual heaven to save said angel's ass, and who embodies Iris by the Goo goo Dolls so perfectly it's a lil suspicious and he probably had smth to do with that song coming to life while he was under cover on Earth. I love a tv show that brings a book to my attention, i loved both of those media and i cannot wait for season 2.

(do i need to explain that gif choice ? no i don't. bye.)

3. Charity Dingle, chaotic bisexual icon if i ever saw one !! haven't had a chance to catch up with the soap since the Vanity shit hit the fan, but i'll get back to her one day because i miss the truly Slytherin Queen that she is (sorry for the HP mention but it belongs to us now, fuck JKR and terfs in general). Pretty sure she's the most flawed character in this list, but i apparently LOVE a queer anti hero ? She's a lot of things and not all of them good ; she's a cheat, a liar, a bad mom most of the time, selfish and venale and has trust issues towards everyone and herself the size of a mountain. She's also a survivor of terrible abuse, a fighter, a love-starved but deeply insecure person who won't let that be seen easily. She's the only such representation i've ever seen of a wlw woman esp in a popular soap, and her simply existing gives me so much hope that society might just be evolving in the right direction ? Idk man, on the good days where i still have faith for lgbt future, she sorta gives me hope for our queer lives to become part of the norm and not just sensational and weird.

2. Regina Mills from OUAT. What a great show with a great lesbian power couple and awesome message about queer families, or so i'm yelling somewhere in that parallel universe where the two cowards who wrote it grew courage instead of magic beans and made Swan Queen canon. I grew to love this character, it wasn't love at first sight (although def lust at first sight, shout out to them Evil Queen gowns) and now i'm trying to write self indulgent fics from her pov and day dreaming about all the things she deserved that she never got. Best redemption arc (apart from my #1 down there maybe) i've ever seen, a full badass bitch energy. Sidenote, Lana Parrilla being the biggest and loudest Swan Queen supporter in the cast felt suspicious to me in the beginning (idk, i don't get me either), but i'm finally at a point where i can fully appreciate how awesome that was of her.

(Yes that gif was queerbait. Yes i still get excited seeing it.)

1. Obv my number 1 queer bitch forever is ROOT from Person of Interest, it's been 6 years and i'm still in denial of the byg trope they pushed down my throat a meer day after she finally got her tiny sociopathic soulmate back. She was a lot of things that i can't detail or i would die from dehydration bc the tears would consume my entire stock of water, but she also happened to appear in a TV show i actually loved. I mean i did start watching strictly for the gayness i vaguely knew was ahead, let's be real, but POI is a show i really came to love so much even when she wasn't a main character. It touched me deeply, and i still rewatch it and get blown away by the genius of so many of its episodes, from the mind blowing plot twists to the soundtrack. I had so many kids on that show and loved them all so much, just thinking about it hurts... We were robbed of a Shoot reboot, and i'll leave it at that.

(look at her being so passionate and right and fierce and hot. loooooook. i would have followed her into battle from day one of her psych ward escape 😢 )

#root #regina mills #charity dingle #crawley #frankie bergstein #wlw #lgbt characters #lgbt stuff #person of interest #once upon a time #emmerdale #good omens #gay omens #grace and frankie #still mad at three fo these for their finales lmao #tumblr games #trying-to-get-somewhere-real #asks #I HAD TO PICK AMONGST ALL MY KIDS I FEEL LIKE SUCH A BAD PARENT AAAH

[feelbokkie]

I'm finally freeeeeee!!!! 🥳 All my seniors graduated today so I can finally stop managing their events and worrying about their grades 😮‍💨 I can't believe it's only been 3 days since I last commented though??? Feels like forever ago. I might be a bit all over the place since I'm gonna talk about chapters 3-5 of DLMLU and I'm running on 3 hours of sleep (I'll do a long sleep after this, no more wake up alarms!)

So I had a feeling Bai was the girl Felix was trying to get over (since I didn't think he'd mention it if it wasn't gonna come up or that you'd add another character into the mix), so I'm just hoping their lie about dating 2 years is still feasible? Unless Lix is just like Y/n, still having feelings for someone 2+ years after things went south with them 😩 Honestly they both dodged a bullet though, since Chan is trash (I'll talk about him later) and Bai is horrible. Like, even if Bai pretends to be nice and stuff in front of Y/n's parents, they HAVE to be like being willfully ignorant about her shitty personality. It's impossible that they're not sensing her absolutely rancid vibes?? Towards their own daughter???? Both Y/n and Felix are totally better off with each other even in this fake relationship/basically just cool friends (for now) with a joint mission lol.

Now onto Chan: he's definitely trash for cheating and yet he's feeling a type of way about Y/n being in a relationship, but also he's being so incomprehensible?? Like, HE proposed to Bai and is all like "I love you" but all signs point to him not even liking her all that much (plus his family doesn't like her either). Dude can even SEE and HEAR how terrible she is, but he wanna clown on himself and ruin his own life lmao.

Also been loving the other stories you wrote, specially When They Notice That You're Not Around! Idk something about it was making me feel a type of way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyways, it's good your interview went well! I hope you aren't too busy in general (saw your upload schedule next week is so filling again~) so I hope you have time to rest and chill!

-👻✌️

You're finally free! Congrats to your seniors and congrats to you for completing another school year! Has it really only been three days? This week has been so hectic for me I've lost track of almost all sense of time. I'm not one to talk, but go sleep!

G, ily but you are killing me bc I want to-- no I NEED to talk about all these theories but I can't without spoiling 😭

Here's what I can talk about:

The two year thing will be addressed next chapter bc I realized the timeline wasn't adding up when I was working on chapter 4 (I rlly need to start writing these things down. But Bai and Lix were always going to have had a thing in the past) But I managed to make it all work, I think

Bai is horrible. I somehow ended up making her worse than I planned, it's really contradicting the whole Lix and Bai thing bc DLMLU!Felix is like the perfect person and Bai is, well Bai

Y/n's parents know Bai is a bitch, they just don't know the extent of how poorly she treats their daughter. They're just willing to overlook it bc they think this is just her coping, albeit in one of the worst possible ways, with the death of her parents (I mentioned that I think, accidental spoiler if I didn't) I will say this, DLMLU!Y/n's parents are significantly better than LR!Y/n's parents they have the right spirit, they're just a little confused.

I also need to talk about my boy Chan but I can't 😭 But the LORE with this man is driving me insane. He's a hot mess.

Those requests have been in my asks for a hot minute, I hope the ppl who requested them saw that I posted. I think I showed my entire perpetually single ass with "When They Notice That You're Not Around." I literally had to take a break to scream into my pillow for like half an hour after each one which is why it took so long to post. Binnie's esp after he pulls reader's chair to be closer to him ✊🏾💥✊🏾💥✊🏾💥✊🏾💥 dear god when will it me my turn

I might be, but that's why I'm doing the scheduled thing. The interview was for an internship and idk how long it'll be before I start. I have to do a background check and fingerprinting since I'll be working around kids for a non-profit. But it'll be unpaid and only one day a week for 8 hours so I'll be busy 5 days a week but it's gucci. I used to run fan pages on top of varsity sports, student council, drama, school, and acting competitions so I'll be fine! Next week looks pretty full but it's mostly drabbles and I can finish those quickly. I might actually do them when I get home from work tomorrow. And purple is mostly done so I really only have to worry about DLMLU.

I am planning to take a small break next month after DLMLU is over bc I just realized the amount of content I've released in a two month period is quite literally bat-shit insane and I'm on track for a burn out if I don't. How long of a break? Idk yet.

I hope you take a much needed rest! You deserve it.

#feelbokkie answers #👻✌️ anon #dlmlu press tour

[only-freaking-sunflowers]

Why I didn’t actually hate my shitty job?

Just a wee blog post amongst all the Eurovision flooding your dash right now. Sponsored by Uber Eats, Google Sheets, and Neurodivergency. 

I’ll keep this as brief as possible. LOL jk I probably won’t, let’s be honest. 

At the end of December, I started working for a local music school. You know, the kind that teaches kids to play the piano or the guitar, or (unfortunately) the violin. (I’m surprised at how many people think it’s cool that I worked at a music school, idk what they’re picturing? It wasn’t that cool.)

And no, this is not at all where I pictured myself, or at all what I went to school for. It just beat going back to the mall, cause working retail kicked my ASS.  

And here’s exactly the thing. This place– while absolutely laden with the kind of bullshit that only small businesses run by a Gen-X white man with an inflated ego are– did not kick my ass. On the day to day, it was actually quite pleasant to be there. And best of all, it was neurodivergent friendly.

What I mean by that is that I got quiet time at the start of my day to ease into things before the kids arrived, drink coffee and answer emails, not to mention that my day started at 12:30pm which is freaking fantastic for my sleep-wake delay. The music teachers, the coworkers I had physically around me everyday (other admin staff, like me, I only ever saw over Zoom, I was the only admin in my location) were lovely people who made the environment really fun. I’m not a kids person really, but I saw the kids in brief passings while they waited for their teacher to be ready for them or their parent to come pick them up. I let them draw on the windows and always had a stocked basket of stickers, so I gained my cool status twice over. I got to run pretty much all the creative aspects of the studio– I wrote on the windows in chalk markers, I decorated the whiteboards, I hung streamers and holiday decor, not to mention learning how to use Canva so I could make our social medias pretty and engaging. And I got to be surrounded my music and creativity all day. 

And I didn’t take it too seriously. It’s music lessons, it’s supposed to be fun. This isn’t a law firm or a hospital, it’s a music school. We’re in the business of letting kids have fun and foster a love for a music and creative expression, the same love that I have.

I felt love for this place and I wanted everyone else to, as well. If you haven’t been able to tell yet, I lead from love, always.

Sometimes I let the mundane tasks slip, I’ll admit. I didn’t take the trash out when it was raining. I didn’t always clean the toilets. Sometimes the phone calls waited until I could muster the energy to talk to a stranger over the phone (but they always got done).

This place definitely had its problems. So many problems. As I said, so much bullshit that only a place like this could have. And our management/staffing structure was.... abhorrent. I had a lot of piling responsibilities, being the only admin staff to work there full-time. We didn’t have a kitchen or a break room, or a fire alarm... or much of anything at all. Let’s not even start on the surveillance issue.

I should’ve run from this place way sooner.

But I liked it there.

No one really gets why. And that’s okay. I’ve had to justify it a few times over the past two weeks– as two and a half weeks ago, I was abruptly fired, and I’ve had to say to people in my life that yes, I worked in a hurricane but specifically I worked in the eye, so it was actually kind of pleasant to be there, even if it was a disaster.

I just texted my favourite coworker cause I remembered her birthday. She turns the big 3-0 today. She said she hopes I’m well and she misses working with me. I never got to say goodbye to her, even though she was the last person I talked to before I got fired, we were making plans for advertising the summer recital as we walked out to our cars at the end of the night. Then I got fired in the morning before she got to work. 

This nagging non-hatred of the job, however shitty it really was, really muddles with the righteous anger of being fired. So I had to put these words somewhere. Apparently Tumblr is useful for more than shitposting and gifsets, huh.

Anyway I’ve applied for 15 jobs this past week so God give me the strength.

#Just belle things #long post #personal

[hyeque]

GOD, THESE MAKE ME SO ANNOYED!!

like, write whatever u want, its fine!! i know not everything i see on the tags is gonna cater to me. whatever.

but i can never self insert in those bc its so !?!?!?! the character is always an asshole, and the reader is so soft and understanding. like mf is out there calling the reader clingy and annoying with no good reason and then making up with a half assed apology. bITCH NO?!?!😀 YOU THINK SORRY IS ENOUGH? i would make them go through the 12 herculean tasks before i even think of forgiving them

AND WHEN THE CHARACTER YELLS AT THE READER ?!?! then they are "I'm sorry, i was stressed" 😐🤨 yeah and?!?! I know my latina ass would never take that shitty ass excuse. first of all, no man is yelling at me and staying unscathed. and second of all, i'm gonna see blood red for awhile if the fucker has the audacity to raise his voice at me.

so yeah, i can't really understand when the reader is immediately taking them back?!?! like bby pls, at least make him work a little for it

oh god yes, you get it. like based on previous experiences in my life, I've learned to not let people talk to me like how they do in those fics so seeing those scenarios is so ...frustrating? it's even more frustrating where reader rightfully says something or even breaks up with the character but then you have people in comment sections requesting a second part where they 'get back together' and in some of these cases, it just isn't realistic. like not everything needs a happy ending IMO. it's sad but true.

and yes, reiterating what you said, it's much better to have the character work for it then to just immediately forgive, like ??? yell back? or at least do something idk.

#chats with: isa

[hanemiso]

im sorry that this is gonna be long 🎤😁 okay so one of my friends started talking to this boy and now they’re dating and i’m fr really happy for her and my other friends are too. but then one of my friends (i’ll call him V)… the whole time they were talking and still now he’s been saying some really out of pocket shit about this guy and it’s clear that he thinks he’s attractive and stuff but he’s taking it a little too far… like for example V is out here saying things like

“ what would you do if you caught him CHEATING ON YOU 🤭 with me 🥰” / “i’m scared to meet him what if i kiss him 🥺” / “i hope he has a crush on me instead of her 🥰” / “me and him can sleep with each other” (we’re planning a sleepover)

just stuff like that but almost everyday. he always talks about kissing him and hoping they end up together and it’s like??? THATS YOUR BEST FRIEND’S MAN?????? some of the shit hes said is so out of pocket and i’ve had enough so last night when V said that thing about sleeping with the guy at the sleepover i called him out.. i was like “wdym by that 🤨” and he went “👁👁” so i tried so spell it out to him i was like HE IS SLEEPING NEXT TO HER. AND HER ONLY.

and then he pulled up some ass excuse and i was like right okay.. and then on his private story he put this thing of the gay men pride flag (the blue one) with a ❌ over it and he was like “Y’ALL” and he kept making jokes about me being homophobic 😭😭 this boy… is tryna call me homophobic for trying to tell him that you don’t say stuff like this about someone else’s boyfriend. i’m literally GAY for a start and second like??? why are you being so petty just because you know you’re in the wrong like come on 💀 he’s also a person who believes he’s always right and always thinks he knows what he’s talking about so it’s nearly impossible to call him out and actually get him to listen/apologise for something 🛌 he’s also a kazutora hater and bi people are “half straight” so idk maybe he secretly hates me because i’m bi and a kazutora stan idk man <3

nah cause he’s a whole red flag. it really doesn’t matter if you’re joking if you’re making other people uncomfortable. also, calling someone lgbtq+ out on their actions does not mean you’re homophobic. he’s being a shitty person and hiding behind that.

seriously why are you still friends with him? dump his ass bro

#[📫] miso’s mail #[🥟] miso soup dumplings #dumpling grace #that’s toxic

[silentxxsoul]

The ‘holy shit how is it the finale already???’ reaction dump:

ayyyyyye here we gooooooo!!!

I'm simultaneously excited for tonight but hella nervous of the potential cliffhanger they'll leave us with (get it, cause the rig goes down a cliff???)

(sorry)

(no im not)

can we stop talking about placentas in smoothies

oh so the real cliff hanger is gonna be early, huh? on the bright side that means we know nothing terrible happens to bobby since we know he's all healthy like at the vow renewal

I'm no firefighter but even I know yall didn't properly anchor that rig. Clipboard Buck would NEVER

Man the 118 has a shitty record with fire trucks lmao

Bobby bby don't internalize it

Buddie BFFs back on my screen doing adorable husband things

Eddie laughing at his own fix-it joke, being all sassy and shit

S6 better be the rise of Sassy Diaz, I'm just saying

MADNEY ♥♥♥♥♥♥

Hell of a miscommunication there Chim holy god

Well, that was dramatic

HENRIETTA NOT OUT LOUD LMAO

I'm gonna be sick too, don't worry

Chim in the background wincing away omg I love him

But also, this gif is worth repeating since they once again are gonna make me barf

Denny!!! He's so big!!!!

Uhm, so wait - not a henren renewal????

No complaints tho, cause Toni and Clive are fucking adorable and I love them

Someone give Karen a hug for me :(

sobbing

Maddie taking big steps for her future (starting over), we love to see it!

Buck, what was that face lmao

Ravi running interference, love it ♥

"Knowing they have your back" - Ravi ships Buddie is canon yall

JFC what was that????

Sorry, I'm still thinking about Ravi's words of wisdom and how they literally called back to Buck and Eddie's "You can have my back any day" and "Or you could have mine".

GOING FERAL OVER IT ACTUALLY

(thats literally fox trying to gaslight me into thinking I'm not seeing the buddie moments)

This rescue is giving me too much anxiety yall

I need them to be ok

Buckley sibling moments, inject them into my veinssss ♥

Buck you are literally talking about you and Eddie, you realize that right? Like you both have been at rock bottom with each other and came out on the other side tOGeTheR

But also, Maddie listen to your brother because that accurately describes you and Chim

This couple is killing me (in a good way tho)

THEY'RE SO ADORABLE STOP I LOVE THEM

THAT MEET CUTE OMG

I don't know that I've ever been this invested in a rescue couple but I do know that I love them and they must be protected at all costs

There's 15 minutes left for BT breakup and a wedding, how the fuck do they fit it in with the commercials ? ? I really think we needed another ep or two - the last couple have felt so packed and fast paced and they could have benefited from more time to wrap things up.

In my heart I want a Buddie "oh" moment during the vows but I know we wont get it, so fellow fic writers pls pls pls deliver k thanks bye

"I'm sorry you're still upset" is such a shitty non apology

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THIS SHOUDL HAVE ENDED A WHOLE ASS SEASON AGO

"Two days of traffic collisions and trash fires will take care of that" idk why that was so funny to me

Eddie looked so cute when Bobby opened that door ♥

I fucking love this scene so much, Eddie and Bobby needed this

"You saved my life, and my sons" brb sobbing and throwing up

BOBBY PUT IT DOWN PLS

OR POUR IT OUT

PLS

THANK YOU

EDDIE THANK YOU TOO

The 118 is such a tight knit family, they keep saving each other and half the time they don't even know they're saving each other

Toni aayyyyyye surprise vow renewal!!!!!!!!

Karen, don't worry I'll take the deviled eggs

NIA FLOWER GIRL AND DENNY WALKING HIS MOMS DOWN THE AISLE IM FUCKING SOBBING THIS IS THE BEST ENDING

Amicable ? Did not expect

Now to wait until September ahhhh

#911 fox #911 fox spoilers

[stfuprettypls]

.

going digging in my blog is so wild bc my intent is to find a good memory (i religiously wrote on this blog for quite a few years) but then stumble upon the SADDEST fucking post by me and then stumbling on even SADDER fucking post two minutes later

i blocked out so much of the first half of 2017 man i deadass forgot i wanted to die the whole time. it was truly such a perfect storm everything happened at once and felt like the rug was pulled from underneath me. i always forget about that academic quarter because it consisted of me needing to take random ass classes because i had failed out of my major and my new major had zero classes available.

my first breakup EVER happened and the situation around it plagued me for years. like literal years it took me ages to be able to overcome all the insecurities that came from it. this was from a time i thought i was unlovable and ugly, who could love me when i didn't even feel proper love? that relationship only confirmed my worldview that i was always going to be at the bottom of the priority list. that fucked me so bad because i was really hoping i was delusional that whole relationship that he would pull through the for me. that he would CHOOSE me. and he didn't and that was fucking devastating. that is what stung so much about it. i hated myself for the way it ended because it was literally because he couldn't choose me.

my 21st birthday? the literal moment i knew. my birthday after a lovely party he threw me. us on his bed already knowing the end was coming. i literally had made the man want to kill himself because i was so stressful to him. it was broken and we both knew. then we had one last genuine talk about who he was choosing. it wasn't me. it wasn't necessarily her. it was him confirming he couldn't choose. i think i told him to talk to his therapist about it, but i already knew. later that week he calls me crying confirming what i knew. we agreed to last one weekend together and then ending it. it was such a solemn weekend with one final date being at the pigeon lighthouse. we didn't kiss once that weekend. it was so sad.

ugh i havent thought about that break up in literal years. for the first time in 7 years do i feel ache over this and it was by randomly remembering. fuck yeah does the first heartbreak sting. idk if its because im stoned or what......too think im even going through this bc i wanted to revisit the date on my blog when i watched la la land

anyways but also:

finding out my friends also wouldnt choose me. the whole thing with that roommate? FUCK fuck fuck fuck. it was traumatizing to lose a friend so ...... spontaneously. such a strange thing so confusing. and then the screaming a few weeks later? and how they didnt stand up for me. and how she mocked me in front of me to her friends in my own HOME in the bus everywhere she could demean me. all over what? this i haven't forgotten so much.

then the other guy that was such a hot fucking mess who also put me the wringer. again, forgot about the pain i endured with him. not bc of heartbreak just because of the cruelty. such a shitty guy. he was EASY to forget about it was a fucking relief

but i remember the fall of 2017. everything changed in 2017. i wonder if he will ever fully understand how much he means to me and how he came into my life during the time i most needed him. new beginnings and i met him. him who i originally was resistant to. idk if he will ever understand how special he is to me and he is really the first person to love me in a way that is not due to familial duty.

[pumpkinupsidedowncake]

Live(ish)blogging my reaction to The Road Not Taken, by Robert Frost, for posterity, part one: the long ass introduction I feel obligated to read.

Introduction by Louis Untermeyer:

Every time I read the lore behind poems I know, which is three times, I learn something that fundamentally alters my perception of the work. Only once have I appreciated the insight. This occasion was not that time.

Additionally, and I don’t know why I’m surprised by this, but this guy is such a Robert Frost simp. I truly don’t think there’s a better word to describe it. When explaining how at first only one magazine wanted to publish any of Frost’s work, Untermeyer basically calls all the other magazines cowards with shitty taste:

They were totally uninterested in poetry that refused to repeat the pretty platitudes of verse; they were afraid to consider a new kind of pastoral poetry which, instead of using the shopworn stereotypes of exaggerated country sentiment, showed the country in its quiet, sometimes drab, but always true colors.

Like, wow. Rip to those other poets. Who, you know, were well-liked enough to get published and all that. But no, I’m sure their art was nothing but unimaginative drivel, Frost’s number one hype man says so and surely he wouldn’t be biased.

Moving on: how the hell is “poetic radiator” a job description?! Now I’m picturing Frost sitting against the wall, making loud humming noises and intermittently saying things like “Poems are cool, yo! You should write one!”

Okay, finally some valuable insight. By my definition of valuable which is extremely relative.

Preferring a reality of experience to a retreat to a fantastic dream-world …

Idk if that’s the right way to end that quote. fuck it we ball. This quote is referring to Frost, and it interests me because of what it could say about Arthur’s gravitation towards Frost’s poetry in Malevolent. It also explains why I’ve never felt particularly drawn to Frost.

Yeah, I should say this for context: the only reason I am reading this book, the only reason I bought it at half price books in the first place, is because I enjoyed the poetry included in that podcast. Well, that’s half the reason. The other is that I don’t really get Frost. I appreciate his artistry, but the emotions he conveys are not immediately relatable to me.

Take, for example: the big one. Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening. The first time I learned of it was through the story behind Eric Whitacre’s choral piece Sleep. I don’t remember if I read it then or not, if I did it made no impression on me. Years later when I actually read and reflected on it, an admittedly childish dominated my mind:

why not just go into the woods for a time?

It’s bad weather, just get wherever you’re going late and blame it on the snow or forgetting something. Cell phones don’t even exist yet, you’re free! Nobody needs to know. The miles will be there when you get back.

I know what the poem is saying. I can understand the experience it’s speaking to, even. But unless I really try to get what it’s going for, I don’t. And that’s why I’m here, reading the longest introduction known to humankind, instead of working on the large assignments due tomorrow, as Robert Frost intended-in-reverse-as-in-definitely-would-not-appreciate-especially-since-he-was-apparently-a-teacher.

I want to get Frost’s poetry, or at the very least make my best attempt at it. I’m a nerd, I basically get a stat boost to this type of thing. I can do this. All I have to do is make it through this introduction. And then the actual poetry collection.

I did it. The introduction is finished. I’m being overdramatic, there were only like two pages left. The last thought I have to offer today is on the last line of the excerpt from Frost’s “The Lesson For Today”:

I had a lover’s quarrel with the world.

It’s described as what he wants written on his tombstone. My first thought was “same”, my second was “wait a minute, is this just a universal thing?” and my third was “no, it’s because I refuse to pick a struggle.” Meaning not everyone would describe their existence as such, but plenty of people probably would.

So yeah. This has been a journey and it’s literally just passing through the gateway. Thanks for watching, like and subscribe, I will be back with more at some point.

#i have no idea how to tag this #tumblr user reacts to classic poetry #with too much snark considering they are reading it for no reason outside of their own enjoyment #apologies to any robert frost simps in the house tonight #things i have said