#no matter how false their memories are they Have them. they have the tools to change and want change

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

hm ok so for a while i was thinking that Wally, for the most part, only perceives reality as "Home", the neighborhood. that's his entire world, it's all he knows

but then i slapped myself and went wait. the Live Interview. Wally has been outside of Home, and has interacted with humans (presuming that the interview did actually happen, of course). and through Wally's interactions - or rather, attempt at interactions with Us, the QA, and the WHRP, it can be strongly assumed that he knows that there's an Elsewhere. there are places outside of Home. maybe he doesn't quite understand that there's another reality of sorts, but there's no way he's unaware that there's more than just the neighborhood out there

(and then of course there's the fact that Clown has said that humans are deeply involved (not a direct quote, im paraphrasing) in Welcome Home. maybe Wally interacted with them / regularly interacted with them. there could have been an adjustment period after he gained consciousness where humans helped him learn how to walk/talk/fine motor skills - this could be why he has such a seemingly inherent / desperate trust in Us & the WHRP & the QA... humans made him and cared for him. it's possible he could view them as a sort of higher power to trust & have faith in

& maybe he's been off-set or could go off-set. i mean, the houses' rooms were all different sets - the buildings themselves were empty husks, right? who's to say Wally wouldn't physically walk to the individual set pieces whenever he went over to someone's house (but then that leads me into speculation on how the puppets' consciousness works and how multiple copies of them could co-exist and wondering which is the - im getting off track. but there's all of that and then the two part "you're okay!" art pieces of Wally & Eddie, which are technically canon - dont quote me on that - and that's Another ramble/theory post i could go on about & have strong feelings on. Anyway!)

"but wait," i hear someone protest, "what about Barnaby? he was in the Live Interview too"

but was he? was he really? was that Barnaby, or was that a person in a suit playing the character Barnaby B. Beagle? i mean, if it was Barnaby, there had to be some memory fuckery going on that prevented him from either fully comprehending/realizing the situation, or just made him forget as soon as it was over.

and actually wait, Wally has to be aware of the reality discrepancy. because it was certainly him in the Interview as himself. He had to have understood on some level that either that wasn't really Barnaby, or that Barnaby wouldn't remember the interview.

(there's a connection in my head between all of this & how he would view an apple pie. "it isn't the same anymore. something's different". but i can't pin it down for the life of me.)

and with the Talking Telephone calls, Wally explicitly tells Us that he's not going to tell anyone who was behind the calls. i remember listening to the "original" prank call audio tests, which while were very similar to the canon in-website ones, have a few changes. one of which was Wally - in the tests - saying that the others weren't ready to meet Us yet. now in canon that tidbit has been swapped out for "You have to go too. You have work to do" but i think it's still implied through Wally's purposeful withholding-of-information that he doesn't think the others are ready to know. or he straight up doesn't want them to know

i mean, one little theory i previously had is that Wally wants them all to catch on to the nature of their reality and situation, but he doesn't want to - or Can't - tell them outright. they have to figure it out. and that can't was either something keeping him quiet, or because if they learned too soon / inorganically, their little puppet heads would pop into confetti like Red Guy's in dhmis 4

However my views have Changed and i'm pretty sure Wally is purposefully not telling anyone to maintain the illusion that everything is fine and can continue on as it always has. maybe it comes from a place of protectiveness, of love? whatever the motive i think he wants them all to keep being unaware and dare i say, Complacent while he "fixes" their situation.

which is delusional, but we all know Wally is digging his metaphorical claws into a desperate bid to keep everything the same / return it to its original state, leaving bloody scratches in something already rotted. or something like that!

all this to say i think it's interesting how it seems that he's the only one aware of humans / an outside/other world, yet he's so determined to stay in his lane. he wants connection & communication yet he doesn't want to leave or change. he wants help in keeping things the same (some could say in keeping Our reality & his separated) but in the process he's dooming everyone/everything and tearing down those walls himself

(Wally: i'm going to stay where i am, and you're gonna stay where you are, and we're gonna help each other keep me and my friends where we're meant to be. anyway i wonder what this sledgehammer does)

#this is a very disjointed ramble but when are they ever put together! #i have to start at point a to get to point 36 yk yk #trying to write down my thoughts is like trying to keep a firm grip on a lubed up ferret #SOAPED!!! SOAPED UP!!! I MEANT SOAP yk that doesnt make it any better. anyway moving on dont look at me #its. its. the more i think about wally the more i go insane #like he's got neurosis stacked on neurosis stacked on- #there is something soooo wrong with him <3 #homebogging #welcome home speculation #wh speculation #i do think his heart is in the right place. i do think he's trying to achieve something he thinks is good & best for everyone #but... despite being aware of more than his friends... technically knowing more Truth than them #he's more trapped by that knowledge. he's ruled by it. and he doesn't really have the - #i dont want to say capacity bc i have to believe that he Can change. he just doesnt know how / currently doesnt want to / is too scared to #but he doesn't have the freedom the others have. bc in their ignorance they can ignore their confines #in a way they're more real than wally despite living in a fabricated world as fabricated people with fabricated lives #they're authentic in their ignorance #and ive said it before and ill say it again - wally was created as a blank slate while everyone else already had a Foundation #no matter how false their memories are they Have them. they have the tools to change and want change #they already perceive themselves as more than what they were made for. they think they're People (not humans - people) dont they? #so if they learn theyre trapped... they'll want out. meanwhile wally is already stuck bc while they have - in a way - More #the neighborhood & the show are all wally has. he knows there's outside but he doesnt have any reason to Want that outside #bc why would he want to leave home? why would he want anything to change? it's his sole purpose isnt it? #idk i just think wally would benefit from being told 'you dont need a purpose / you dont need to adhere to a purpose / you are enough as Yo #doing what You want. you can just Be' #but yk. what was i talking about again #oh yeah - wally is so so aware and yet so in the dark #he's got one half of the puzzle but they're all corner/edge pieces and he's trying to fill the inside space with Nothing #hm. i wonder if he'll end up needing the other neighbors to help finish the puzzle... who's to say who's to say!! #FUCK YOU TUMBLR I HAD MORE TO SAY. CUT OFF AGAIN AGH

[seiless]

This may get a bit dark, but how about some heavy hurt/comfort. I used my irl d&d campaign as my Astarion route Tav (tiefling wild magic sorceress) intending for BG3 to be the next adventure in her storyline after the d&d campaign... then my DM threw some really messed up angst at her, knowing I'm a lover of angst and Astarion. Turns out her mother (a queen & sorceress) had been using her as a pawn to seduce, charm, and eliminate rivals who wished to usurp her throne, then erased the memories and planted false ones.

So maybe dome hurt/comfort of Astarion when Tav finds out what she's actually been through, her life has been a pie, etc etc? If this is too heavy/too specific, pls just delete but the campaign has been being A TIME for me and I need some Astarion affection

(The first prompt is finished, at last! Many more to come! U V U)

You were used. Of course you were. If all your other companions had some sort of difficult or twisted past, why would you be any different?

But it wasn’t that you had one as well that bothered you. What had your stomach in knots and your heart twisting apart was the fact that it had been happening your whole life…and you hadn’t ever once noticed.

That you weren’t just your mother’s daughter; no, far from it. You were your mother’s tool. A weapon for her to wield, to manipulate and coerce others to do what she needed them to do.

Not only did you never have a say in the matter…you didn't even realize it. Not until your memories were forcefully returned by the tadpole and broke whatever insidious curse that kept the truth at bay.

They didn’t come all at once; they started as nightmares, over the course of months. The kind that became more frequent, more vivid.

And then the realization struck; they weren’t nightmares at all. They were memories. Shadowheart helped you come to this realization when you explained what you were suffering through each night.

Astarion had been awre of these dreams that tormented you; sharing a tent did make that easy. But you had insisted he not worry; it was your problem to resolve, and he had enough he had to deal with.

But that didn’t stop him from keeping a close eye on you. So when you strode from Shadowheart’s tent that night and made a beeline for your own, he could tell quite clearly something was wrong.

His gaze flicked to Shadowheart, who had lingered at the entrance and watched as you steppped away. She was worried; that much was obvious.

Astarion pursed his lips, but knew there was little time to wait. With a lift of his chin and a fluff of his tunic, he made his way over to the tent you had disappeared into.

Of course, he could hear the sobs before he’d even reached you. The sound was muffled, pressed into the palm of your hand. 

It did make his heart twist. You had done so little to deserve such distress (well, in his unbiased opinion).

His initial thought was to dismiss any heartfelt attempt at comfort, say something lighthearted and teasing to break the heaviness that suffocated the tent.

He thought better of it, and instead reached out to take hold of your hand, gingerly forcing your attention away from the bedroll you had all but pressed yourself tightly into.

You turned your head some, offering a little acknowledgement to the vampire.

But there was little else you could do; not without a whole new waterfall of tears gushing forth.

“What did they say?” He asked gentlyin a soft voice; gentle enough that it might coax you from the whimpering.

You shook your head, averting your gaze back to the dirt in front of you.

“It was all real. The nightmares…t-they were memories. All of it. .I was…I was a tool. A pawn, used by my own…” You choked back a sob, and he could hear your teeth grind as your jaw clenched tightly. My own mother.”

Astarion nodded quietly; he had suspected as much, given the vividness and the sheer amount of detail you were able to recall with each instance.

You bit your lip, squeezing his hand tightly.

“I don’t know what to think…the things I did for her, Astarion, what I thought was right, what would help her….the people I hurt, that I-!’

“I’m quite familiar with it, darling.” Astarion’s tone remained gentle, if only with a hint of a teasing lilt. “If it’s any comfort, at least you didn’t know the things you were doing were inherently wrong.”

You whipped your glare back to him, pulling your hand from his. “That doesn’t make it any better. That makes it worse. I couldn’t even atone for my sins because I thought it was the right thing to do. That I was doing it for her- Gods, I can’t believe…”

There was a deep, unending understanding in his heart. There were few who could understand what you were going through. 

“I…I am sorry, my love. I know exactly what you’re going through. To have come from your own mother is unfathomably awful. It is something no one deserves…least of all, you.”

You nodded, pushing the tears away as you worked to sit yourself upright. Your expression was bordering on embarrassed; sheepish. Like you were ashamed to be telling him any of this.

“Thank you, Asta, really. But…but I don’t think it’s anything like what you had to go through. I wouldn’t dare compare the two things.”

“You didn’t. I did. You weren’t given a say in your actions; certainly, you may not have been tormented and brutalized in a whole host of different ways, but-”

“My point exactly,” You frowned, this time moving to take his hand in your own. Your body was hot with sorrow; with anger. “You don’t need to try and-”

“I’m not doing anything other than giving you the same compassion you've shown me. You needn't belittle your experiences simply because it doesn't compare to my own.”

“I-I’m not trying to comp- I just- I’m sorry. I’m a mess.” You shook your head, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I don’t want to be this. I hate that this is what I am. I hate that she made me this way, and I didn’t even know it. And I don’t want to t-talk about it either, because I’m hardly t-the only one with issues like this!”

“But you still need time to process it, as we all did. And you will not be alone in this. Quite the contrary; I’m certain there’s a number of people that are willing to be there for you, aside from myself.”

“That’s…that’s true.” You sniffed, taking in a long, shaking breath in a feeble attempt to calm down. “I’m sorry. You're right, I’m just…I’m not in a good headspace. I do need some t-time to process it.”

“Couldn’t agree more, darling.” Astarion smiled softly, “Would you prefer to be on your own? I’ll gladly fuck off, if you demand it.”

“No.” You shook your head, holding out a trembling hand. “I want you to stay.” 

Cool fingertips skated over your palm, and laced with your own as he drew you gently into his chest. Deceptively broad, and reliably strong, you melted into him, unwinding your hands so that you could properly wrap your arms around him and fall into a much needed embrace.

Astarion laid you both down gingerly, prizing your comfort as the floodgatesopened once more.

You don’t know how long you cried, and at certain points, you weren’t entirely sure what your breaths were hitching for.

But when the storm passed, and you finally cried yourself asleep, Astarion was there.

Unwavering in his loyalty, reluctant to let you go for even a moment, his thoughts were filled only with you.

Well, you and a variety of schemes to take revenge on your mother, but you nonetheless.

You were there in the darkest of times, and knew you would remain at his side when he finally found the strength to face his greatest fears.

There could be no doubt that he would do the very same for you. He would never allow such a concern to ever cross your mind.

#astarion #tav #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion x tav #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #astarion x reader #hurt and comfort #f!tav #fem tav #woohoo first official story! #requests are open #so please dont hesitate to send more :')

[jackdaw-kraai]

The thing I think isn't talked about enough in all these conversations about "AI art" is how, even if you work out all the kinks, even if you get it to the point that it works perfectly according to the most lofty goals set, even if all that came true... AI will still disappoint when set next to even just a moderately skilled human artist. Not because of any technical flaws with the product, but because of its fundamental limitations as a tool.

AI, as we understand it right now, without all the grandstanding and doomsday predictions and near-mythological qualities we ascribe to it, works on binary. Down to its core, stripped to its studs, it works on binary code, and you see that reflected in the design. Every choice it makes, every result it produces, is a result of a million, billion "yes or no" questions asked of it that chain together into a coherent response. Endless amounts of "TRUE or FALSE" results spat out when data is fed into it, that string together to form a conversation, or an essay, or a painting, or a comic. At least, when trained on enough data to weigh the odds in favor of what the creators want it to do.

If you ask ChatGPT to tell you something about romance, it filters its endless data banks for what that training data it was given matches your request and what results in those tests were rewarded by its programmers and which were discouraged and based on all that, it begins making TRUE or FALSE choices with the odds weighed by that data. That's how all AI we currently have fundamentally work, and that, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. It's a tool, and tools are hard pressed to be evil. What it is, however, is vastly inferior to the process of a human writer for one simple fact: when asked a question, we have more options than to answer it TRUE or FALSE.

If you ask a human writer to tell you about romance, they too will draw upon all the memories they have stored away of what they know about romance and base an answer off of that. But they will also draw up all the knowledge they have on astronomy, to compare the feeling it creates inside to that of hydrogen fusing, and that of medicine, because it burns so bright inside that it feels like your rib cage feels like it should be alight from the inside until it looks like an inverted x-ray image. A human writer will visualize the way love feels and draw connections an AI couldn't fathom, because it was never trained to do so. And more than that, if a human writer tells you about romance, they won't tell you just about romance.

They will tell you about how romance happens.

They will tell you about what romance between a young Polish woman and a young Polish man living in what would one day be the powiat of Bieszczadzki on the border with Ukraine, but for now are just the Bieszczadzki mountains, in the spring of 1914 would have looked like. And they will tell you about how it looked like all the months afterwards as the young man is drafted into the army and their home is ravaged by WWI as the Bieszczadzki mountains become one of the most bitterly contested regions in the Eastern Front during the war. They will tell you about how romance, how the love blooming from it, cannot fix the damage wrought by senseless battles fought by powers so much greater than the two of them, but how it carries them through the war nonetheless.

And what's more, they will know enough about the history of Poland to parallel the growing love between these two young people with the growing, not-yet-formed modern state of Poland that will once again rise from the ashes of the war after having previously been partitioned by greater powers into non-existence.

A human writer will not only have the knowledge to do that, they will have the skills and manner of thinking necessary to form the thoughts that will lead to such a story and make it into something incredible. An AI, no matter how well you train it, no matter how good you make it at emulating a writer's style, will not be able to form the same thought process. Not because it is flawed, but because it simply isn't built for that.

An AI cannot experience nationalism or patriotism for a country, an AI cannot reason out how people might have lived in the absence of credible historic evidence when it runs up against a gap in its data, an AI will not understand the link between fragile, young love blooming in adversity and a country struggling to be reborn in spite of the greater nations around it that wish it would remain dead. It cannot do this, because it isn't based in "TRUE or FALSE" questions. It's based in the painfully human experience of complicated emotions, difficult thoughts, and yes, even deeply flawed ways of looking at the world that nonetheless are beautiful exactly for having those flaws.

An AI, at its core, with where the technology is right now, is a machine of averages. Even if we polish it to peak performance, that will not change. At peak performance, it will still give you an average of all the possible answers it could give, it will be technically flawless, and it will never be anything even close to a fraction of the lightning in a bottle that a writer with categorically shit technique can capture if their heart and mind are put into it.

And let's be honest here and step a foot outside of the bubble of speculation, just for a bit: AI will never, ever, give you an answer or story that pushes boundaries or makes you think like even the most technically incompetent but passionate authors are able to.

Because in order to push boundaries, in order to deliver a message, you have to be willing to make people uncomfortable. You have to be willing to be messy and raw to the point that your story bleeds. And even if we polished AI to perfection, even if, by some miracle of a completely new and fresh coding base, it could do all those things... the humans pulling the strings of the machine would never allow it to do so. Because if their machine produces stories that push boundaries, that have things to say, that make people uncomfortable, it's not going to be profitable. It's not going to be advertiser-friendly. It's not going to please the stock market. And let's be honest here, in the end, that's what matters to those people.

AI cannot write the stories that people want it to, that they truly want it to, because in the end, the stories we want to hear are not the stories it can tell. The stories we want to hear are, in the end, painfully human, in all the best and worst ways possible. And if you want a human story, if you want to have something like that lightning in a bottle, AI can never be more than a tool in making them instead of the maker itself. A potentially useful and innovative tool, but nothing more than that.

Because if you want human stories, no one but a human will be able to write them. And no one but a human will be able to read them and understand what's being said.

#wga strike #chatgpt #ai #ai critical #wga solidarity

[collabwithmyself]

Is there anywhere to find the basics on Milton and Hitoshi. I am compelled

I will do my best to explain them both and their relationship!! @wizardmolars and I have SO much fun writing them.

Dr. Milton Beech is quite literally a self-made man- he woke up not long ago with no memories and only one thing in his mind: you need to heal. His flat voice and expression contrast his sheer audacity; he does what he wants and doesn't care who's against him. Frustrated with the state modern healthcare is in, and trying to find a way to practice medicine without sacrificing the comfortable niche he's carved for himself, he is a man of staunch morals and no patience for those that would do harm to others. He doesn't care about who he was, all that matters is who he is now- but he can't quite escape his nightmares, and false voices like radios and phone calls threaten to send him spiraling into a horror he refuses to behold the shape of.

Hitoshi Hidaka is many things- a chatterbox of a mailman, a bumbling father of one, selfless to a fault, and a carrier of many, many mistakes. He keeps a sunny smile on his face to distract from the trauma and neuroticism that plagues his day to day life, and refuses to elaborate on what claws at him- he can handle it himself, after all. His secret keeping has put a strain on his relationship with his daughter, and he feels like he doesn't deserve good things in life. Between that and his fear of being a nuisance to others, he's a desperately lonely person.

How the two meet varies- but they wind up with a mutual respect for each other. Hito upholds Milton's boundaries, Milton is patient with and defends Hito. They wind up giving each other the tools they need to face their respective pasts- teaching each other how to rely on others, as well as inspiring Hito to be more confident and Milton to be more lenient.

You can read excerpts from one AU involving them, the Fallout: New Vegas AU, here!

#iamonlyatiger #wizardmolars #buttermint #hitoshi #collab answers #fnv au #collab writes

[dc-said-bi-robin-rights]

In Another World (1151 words) by ajvt

Tools, like him. Machines. Beeping. People standing over him. Latex gloves caressing his body, like worms, like sand. Face masks. Scalpels glinting under overhead lights.

He’s at the Farm. He never left.

no stop not again I will make you pay I will make you scream

“Cyrus?” Voice, faint. Light. Alarms, blaring. Roaring. Boots. Get them. Stop them. No escape. She won’t allow it. She won’t let her stop it.

“Cyrus, can you hear me?”

Maybe he did leave. Not that it matters. He’s back, and it’s worse this time. Not even a cuckoo. Just a thing.

“Cyrus, you need to wake up.” Why? Does it matter? They’ll make him anyway. He doesn’t need to do anything.

“Cyrus!”

Unless…

“Cyrus!”

Static. Familiar, like a hug. Scary, once. But not like theirs. Not completely. Not where it mattered.

“Cyrus!”

The man who was once Sidestep peels back the lid of his true eye and sees only static. His other eyes, his false eyes, his man-eyes, though… they see the woman.

An impossible thing. A weak hope.

And yet here. Here and real.

His lips crack open, parched and weak from years of disuse. He doesn’t know how many. “Ortega?”

Alarms blare, again and again. A storm of thoughts engulfs his senses, a haze clouding his visions. And yet the smile of the woman that looks down on him as real as a memory.

“You’re awake. Thank God. I thought…”

“You… you can’t be here,” he interrupts, blinking as if doing it enough times would dispel the illusion. “You moved on. You stopped looking.”

“What are you talking about?” Ortega asks, before shaking her head. “Nevermind, forget i said anything. We need to get you out of here before the guards come.”

“The… guards…?”

“Yes, the guards,” Ortega says, moving over to the machines holding him in place, out of his line of vision. It vexes Cyrus, not being able to turn his head to look at her, not being able to feel her in his mind, to simply have to trust that she is there. But she is, and a moment later, he hears the crackle of lightning surging into the machines behind him, followed by the release of the clamps around his extremities.

He was free. Just like that. Cyrus felt sudden tears spring to his eyes, tears which he angrily blinked away. So long spent lying down, half-naked, a thing for their tools to poke and prod… and then it was just over. Like a switch. It was almost too much to believe, too much to trust.

“Can you stand?” Ortega’s voice again, from behind him. Cyrus barely hears her, so she sighs and picks him up, holding him to her chest bridal-style as his eyes flutter closed. The practical part of Cyrus’ mind doesn’t like that—she should keep at least one arm free in case she needed to fight, he knows that—but he is so inconceivably, inexplicably exhausted he can’t bring himself to voice that thought. It was the kind of tiredness that went beyond the physical, like the point after a fight where the adrenaline wears off magnified a thousand fold.

It didn’t matter, though. Ortega was here. He didn’t have to be strong anymore. He could just… sleep. It would be all okay. Things would work themselves out, and…

They’re in a corridor. A man stands in front of them, a guard, like Ortega said. He is shouting, inside and outside. Cyrus can hear him, inside and outside. His thoughts are like a stream of hail, pointed and sharp, scared and furious, focused outwards. Towards them. Towards him. He has a gun, long, smooth, with a pump. A shotgun. He won’t hesitate to shoot if Ortega doesn’t turn back. Doesn’t stop. Doesn’t leave him here.

A moment later, the gun goes off in the guard’s mouth. He drops to the floor, chunks of his head splattering the walls. The only choice. One he doesn’t regret.

Ortega holds him tighter. Is she scared? Of him? That doesn’t make sense to Cyrus. She’s the Static. He should be scared of her.

“Come on,” she says, shaking off her shock. Cyrus doesn’t miss the fact that she steps over more bodies than just that of the guard as she continues forward. One of them is charred, which is interesting, because usually Ortega makes an effort not to kill.

Some of them aren’t, though. Most of them aren’t.

Was the guard the first? The last?

“You okay down there?” Ortega’s voice. They aren’t in a corridor anymore. He can see the sky.

The sky. How long has it been since the last time he could claim that?

“I should be asking you that question,” he says. It smells like burnt meat.

“I’ve still got enough juice to get you out of here.” A grimace. A smile? She doesn’t like killing. She’s doing it anyway, because Re-Genes don’t stop coming, don’t stay down when they should. Pain-Gate. Like the one he had.

Has she gone mad, like him? Mad, for him? Cyrus doesn’t know. Cyrus doesn’t care.

“You work for the government.” It’s a non sequitur, not to mention a stupid thing to fixate on, but she’s a Ranger. “You can’t do this. You’re a Ranger.”

“Not today I’m not.” Ortega smiles, and somehow he knows right then and there that this is fake. “Today I’m…”

He never gets to hear her finish.

His eyes snap open to darkness, sweat sliding down his body as he sits up, heart racing. The sheets feels familiar, as does the bed underneath him, and when he sends his frantic mind out he can sense only the woman, downstairs… cooking, humming to herself, thinking of bacon and cereal and other inane insanities. Beyond that, the fluttering thoughts of the horses. The goat that was more than a goat. And next to him…

“Hey,” says the Static, sitting up in bed, voice soft. She places her hand on his shoulder—his naked shoulder, because it doesn’t matter if she sees anymore, not after the crash. “You okay?”

The Ranch. Ortega. It’s a relief, in some ways. It’s a disappointment, in others.

“Just a dream,” Cyrus says, because he doesn’t blame her anymore. It was Steel who abandoned him, not her. He knows that now. “Go back to sleep.”

“Mmmh, if you say so.” Ortega presses a kiss to his shoulder and lays back down, closing her eyes. “Was it at least a nice dream?”

“It was about you,” he admits, which makes her grin. Cyrus rolls his eyes, even though she can’t see it. “Can it, old woman. Just because it was about you doesn’t mean it was nice dream.”

“Well, was it?”

She’s too smug for her own good.

Doesn’t mean she’s wrong.

“It was.” He lays back down and closes his eyes, feeling Ortega place her arms around his waist. “It really was.”

#fallen hero retribution #fallen hero rebirth #fallen hero #fhr #fhr sidestep #fhr charge #fhr ortega #chargestep #julia ortega #fhr julia ortega

[misscammiedawn]

To add in to the recent discussion of Goncharov and Unreality, I want to take a moment and focus on how these concepts interact with the hypnosis community.

I will make quick note that this post may contain themes of psychological abuse (both intended and unintended) and hopefully acts as a bit of a learning tool.

If you are playing with hypnosis or thinking about playing with hypnosis... do take into consideration the lingering impacts of what extended play will do to the mind. I have seen it said in some circles that hypnosis is edge play and though I do not believe that myself, I have experienced the very kind of impact that could cause one to believe it. I have had my morality, boundaries, sense of self and grip on reality tested, altered and broken in the past. In ways I, fool that I was, believed at the time to be consensual.

I wouldn't wish my history on anyone.

Which is why I want to make note of something. Hypnosis can change a person's perception and mess with their ability to differentiate between real and fantasy. Between self and imposed. I feel like the majority of people working within the space understand that, but it's important to note. If you make someone see fireflies when they feel someone's hand stroking along their forearm, you NEED to ground that suggestion with "you'll know that they are a product of this hypnotic suggestion" you can even add some conditioning in there, "and knowing will prove just how deeply you surrender to me, knowing that it is a product of hypnosis will only further cement how captivating those glowing fireflies are and how mesmerizing it can be to look at them."

But you've GOT to add that awareness of reality in to every suggestion. Package hallucinations in fantasy, twist a person's mind and bend reality until hypnotee surrenders it completely and hypnotist controls it entirely. Do so. Eagerly. Wantonly. With bliss and blessing. But ALWAYS make sure that before and after a session a person has a grip on their reality. Because even the small things will take a toll on a mind.

I only have the perspective of a mildly psychotic insane woman. I cannot speak to neurotypicals (though I believe this kink attracts neurodivergent folx by default). But I can say that I cannot tell if some memories of my past actually happened or were guided fantasies or dreams or things I just thought up. A decent majority of my life is based on journal entries, testimonies from other people and a foot kept in the door of reality that tells me that "no matter how much you can recognize the scent of the spirit hallow that you visited in a tabletop game or the light headed tingle of the honey sweet air of Arcadia, those things are just fantasies made from sitting at a table with close friends. They didn't happen.".

There is such an allure to being able to control a hypnosis partner to the point of which your words shape reality. I know full well a partner wanted to use those exact words on my "my words shape your reality" before realizing that my psychotic little brain would not react well to that suggestion, and paused for a check-in to negotiate the wording of that concept. I shall eternally be grateful for that.

No matter that allure, though, the responsibility to leave your partners and yourself tethered to reality is *vital*.

Here are some good ideas for how to do that:

1. Create a box, save file, protective boundary or however you prefer to imagine the concept, that preserves the hypnotee's state of reality, mindset and security before the scene begins and restore it afterwards. Same concept as an amnesia scene, but with emphasis on grounding.

2. Mention that the hypnotee will always be aware of the false status of the suggestion and that they are acting under guidance. Reinforce this with a hypnotist's presence. Ensure you both understanding the "Guided" portion of guided imagery.

3. Aftercare that focuses on grounding and building reality. You spend a decent part of the scene/prep destroying those walls. Build them back up together.

4. Check-in can include a simple "are there any things you're unsure about right now?" display curiosity and understanding. I, myself, feel deep shame about my sense of disconnection from reality. At an earlier phase of my life I dove into danger and drove away from Real without considering the risk or how it would impact my partner... which leads to:

5. Be upfront. As I said. I am deeply ashamed of my poor mental health. Elements of it I still cannot disclose to my Family. But I consider it a moral act to tell my partners, especially when we play. If you even worry that you may not be able to keep a firm grip on reality, make requests, ask for the kind of grounding you feel would play best for you.

My hope is that my situation is far removed from The Normal enough that this post is a waste of words. But on the off-chance that you, as a hypnotee or hypnotist, have never considered the damage of not grounding or trying to blur reality to the point of it being unrecognizable from fantasy? I hope this gives you pause to think about it.

Just be safe out there, folx. I love you all and this silly little kink we share.

Send Asks if you need more details on everything.

#dawn posting #hypnokink #hypnosis #community safety #mental health #personal #watch me post my trauma in public #bpd #hypnokink writings

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

[Monkie kid season 3 episode 4 spoilers, tw abuse] 

SO many things make sense about Macaque’s character and the way he’s been acting now after episode 4. Man’s basically straight up been abused by LBD.

AND THE WAY HE’S ALWAYS SO THROWN BY THE WAY MK RESPONDS TO HIM NOW MAKES SENSE TOO NOW

BECAUSE MK IS HIM. Macaque is to Mk what LBD is Macaque. Macaque is threatened and abused and he turns around and does the same things to Mk, responding violently to him, gloating, threatening, telling him “you’re nothing,” because LBD tells him in the wake of “HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN WHO I AM? WHAT I AM?” he is nothing. 

And then instead of continuing the cycle of taking it and turning around and being that person to someone else, Mk breaks out, fights back, and asks him why he’s doing this. 

Macaque says “FIGHT BACK” but it’s almost like he wants to lord over him the fact that he can’t fight back rather than get him to actually fight back. Mk is powerless and Macaque is powerful and he can do nothing, he is nothing. That could be why he alway seems to look so surprised whenever Mk actually fights back. 

Mk doesn’t react like he does. Instead he breaks the cycle. He’s kind to his friends, what’s more is he’s kind to Macaque. And when he doesn’t back off, he kicks out kicks back, because Mk knows what’s happening is wrong and that Macaque is wrong and he has a group of friends who supports him and mean the world to him, and he will take it all, but the moment you put them in danger he fights, and that is what Macaque doesn’t have. 

He miscalculates because he assumes everyone is like him or thinks like him or reacts like him like he thinks they will, but his ability to see that is completely screwed by the fact that he’s been manipulated and abused and gaslit by the Lady Bone Demon. He can’t even see people anymore. Like… 

He’s in a rough spot. We don’t know how long LBD had to mess with him or how much in his head isn’t real that she showed him, or how much is through his warped lens, or how much was planted as false memories by her. How almost angelic like she looks in the flashback feels wrong. 

Macaque’s unstable right now. Straight up. He’s lashing out more than ever, unhinged in a way that really illustrates the fact he’s falling apart right now. He got taken advantage of when he was near-death and agreed to a deal that has trapped him in an abusive horrible situation. Can’t even get a good figure on how that happened because both LBD and Macaque are unreliable narrators. Even Macaque’s own memories could be something changed by LBD, a specific version of events that she forces him to remember when they might not be true. 

However he got there, Macaque is in a pretty horrible situation. Mk, who’s been directly traumatized and manipulated by LBD is in a pretty horrible one too, but he’s choosing to try and find something to beat her, when, to Macaque, she is unbeatable, so why try to do anything but follow her and stay on “the winning side”. He’s been pretty thoroughly snapped to pieces and sculpted into her “champion”. It’s not him. But that’s who he has to be right now to survive in his mind. 

Macauqe is LBD’s “champion” and Macaque is trying to make Mk his “student” which is basically just code word for “tool” and “punching bag”. And the cycle of abuse ends there, because Mk won’t let it continue. 

Being in a situation like that is no excuse to treat anyone the way he does, abuse is abuse no matter what you experience, Macaque is to Mk what LBD is to Macaque and yet Mk chooses be kind despite that, even if the situation is so similar. It doesn’t make what he does okay, but it does provide a much closer look at why he acts and reacts the way he does to things. 

Why doesn’t he fight back?

Well, he tells us himself. 

“Kid, you can’t even beat me.” 

When Sun Wukong was at full power, Macaque couldn’t beat him. And when Mk fought LBD all out, using all of Sun Wukong’s powers, he lost, Sun Wukong even hasn’t tried to fight her. So, if he can’t beat them he knows he can’t beat her when she’s stronger than them. The way he treats Mk actually kinda just tells him exactly what he thinks and his rationalization behind things. 

Anyway, Macaque’s an abuser who has been abused himself and hecking needs therapy. Looking forward to getting more of the backstory between him and Wukong cause that could provide SO much more insight to his character and I am STARING. 

#Knox rambles #Monkie Kid analysis #Lego Monkie kid season 3 spoilers #Monkie Kid season 3 spoilers #tw abuse #abuse mention #Six Eared Macaque #ANYWAY I'M JUST RAMBNLING THOUGHTS #Macaque's not in control so he tries to manipulate Mk to feel in control #tells him who he is and what he will be #even though none of it's true #sees Mk's kindness and seems to think it'lll go away after a while scoffs at it laughs #i'M JUST #H #cycle of abuse #absolutely FASCINATING that that is the approach they took with Macaque and i do wonder if that was a conscious decision #GOSH THO IT'S VERY WELL DONE #THIS SHOW IS FIRE THE HECK #Macaque is gonna fail and then... #well #long post #kinda #bG;KLANMEWOF #This got a little heavy but WOW #that was heavy to watch #honestly every ep with mac in has been heavy with the abuse and manipulation #felt it since day one but hoooo boi #ep 4 was real heavy #twitter doesn't get this analysis cause they're not ready for it LOL BGLKSDMF;AWE

[twistedintern]

~A summary/analysis of Mozus Trein’s voice lines [from Unified Exams No.7]~

Once again, the following analysis would not possible were it not for the efforts of the one and only Ras and their terrific Mystery Shop Translations. Theirs is not short of a bonafide labor of love; I am eternally grateful for their kindness in allowing me to corroborate my own interpretation of game content with top-quality translations.

The voice lines under examination in this post can be found here.

DISCLAIMER: As with my previous writings on staff voice lines, please keep in mind that this post is speculative in nature and should not, under any circumstances, be heralded as canon.

Let’s not delay any longer, dear visitors!

(As an added bonus, I furthermore have in my drafts a critical treatment for your reading pleasure: that is, a “mini-study” detailing Professor Trein’s relationship with another canon character, featuring evidence gleaned from personal episodes.)

FACTS

- He lives alone - His adult daughters correspond with him through written letters - They are concerned for his well-being; they often ask after his health and urge him to call upon them if ever a need - His view of academia is certifiably a no-nonsense one. He insists the duty of students is singular in nature: learning should--no, must--take precedence - He is firmly against utilizing the Internet as a research tool and/or study aid. According to him, it is rife with false information that anyone can claim factual. Books and printed matter (which require review in most cases) are far more reliable in his eyes - Not only does he loathe yawning during his class, he finds the gesture rude in public settings in general - He asserts that each and every one of Night Raven College’s instructors care deeply for students’ success and behave in accordance to seeing pupils realize their potential. No matter how strict he and his colleagues may be, what they do is for students’ own good - He strives to keep up a presentable, professional image befitting a scholar: little else factors into his choice in attire. In the interest of tidiness, he always has a lint roller handy for the removal of cat fur - He demonstrates admirable dedication to maintaining an orderly home and domestic environment, such that he cleans his kitchen and bathroom daily. He attributes this habit of his to his late wife--he thinks it unkind toward her memory to live in squalor - He does not play favorites; he treats all students equally - He has on a prior occasion consulted Vargas on the topic of keeping physically fit in a manner befitting his age. True to form, Vargas suggested he take up Magift... Trein is reluctant to pursue the latter’s advice on account of the risk of injury - He provides us with another example of Sam’s product savvy: despite Trein’s misgivings, Lucius has loved each and every cat toy the former has recommended. (A curious thing indeed, as the same cannot be said for the toys he personally selects!)

Logical Assumptions

- When he mentions “living alone,” he means, “living alone with Lucius”. Lucius is an indoor cat, after all: it would be strange if he did not share his domicile with his beloved companion - As he speaks of (laments) time passing since his daughters were small, it’s quite likely many years have passed since they “left the nest”

Speculation

- His daughters demonstrate incredible devotion to their father as well as an interest in his affairs: this very pronounced attachment could be an immediate consequence of having lost their mother early in their lives. Taken a step further, it’s possible that upon entering adulthood they came to recognize his labors and sacrifice as a single parent--a tremendous feat of selflessness and love

#twisted wonderland #twisted-wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twst spoilers #mozus trein #kyuu speculates

[haveyouprayedtonight-desdemona]

albedo’s relationship with rhinedottir is such an important key aspect to his character and yet i never really see people talking about it? rhinedottir left albedo’s prototype, a living being with emotions, to die because he wasn’t good enough. knowing this, i imagine that albedo probably lived to be perfect only for her to eventually abandon him as well, essentially confirming that he would never be good enough for her no matter how human-like he seemed. albedo’s character story describes rhinedottir as a cold, strict woman who would threaten to leave him if he ever failed her. it specifies that he believed her, too — rhinedottir evidently wouldn’t have hesitated to throw albedo out just like she’d done to his brother. to rhinedottir, albedo was always replaceable. sure, we don’t know a lot about the specifics of their relationship. maybe there was more nuance on her part, but from the way that i see it, rhinedottir either didn’t see albedo as sentient despite creating him to be so, or she knew that he was but just didn’t care. one thing is for certain: rhinedottir treated albedo like an experiment.

(what makes this even more interesting to me, though, is durin. in the festering desire’s description, we see him refer to rhinedottir as “mother” multiple times, and she also refers to her creations as “my lovely children”, which tells me that she must’ve established parent-child relationships with them. durin’s memories paint a completely different picture of rhinedottir in comparison to albedo’s. rhinedottir was kinder to durin, she calls him “lovely” and tells him that she’s sending him away from khaenri’ah in order to “display his beauty”, a stark contrast to the way that she seems to have treated albedo (albedo also says that he considers rhinedottir to be family, but he never outright calls her “mother” in the same way that durin does. i think that’s interesting.) in the end, though, rhinedottir still corrupted durin and sent him to his death, so i don’t think she really cared about him either. at the end of the day, no matter how she treats them, rhinedottir only sees her creations as tools that she can use for her own gain.)

so, okay, rhinedottir doesn’t care about her creations. fine. cool. albedo doesn’t see it that way. or maybe he does and he just doesn’t care. albedo knows about durin, he knows about his prototype and what she did to him and yet he still loves rhinedottir. he still views her in a falsely positive light and doesn’t seem to register anything wrong with the way that she treated him. he maintains that rhinedottir means more to him than words like “family” or “master” can convey. he still thinks it was his fault that she left and now he’s stuck chasing after an impossible goal in an attempt to get her to come back. meanwhile, she evidently cared for him conditionally and left as soon as she found something more interesting to study (we don’t know the full story but that’s how it looks). in a way, i feel that he must have somewhat realized that his relationship with rhinedottir wasn’t healthy on some level because, while he’s not exactly warm, he doesn’t treat sucrose or timaeus the same way at all. like, he’s patient with them and he helps them out on a personal level. i can only imagine that he learned this by examining his relationship with his master and realizing that it bothered him at some point. that’s mostly just speculation on my part, though.

the thing about albedo is that, on the exterior, he seems to have moved past it. he’s still looking for the “truth of this world” as far as we know, but he’s also managed to find a place in mondstadt on his own, divorced from rhinedottir’s influence. he’s developed hobbies outside of alchemy, likes and dislikes, has made friends and has even met people that he considers family. sure, he lives in a secluded cave on a mountain so, i mean, it’s not like he’s social but he’s his own person. albedo also seems to have come to terms with his origins as a synthetic human, the mark on his neck and has accepted it as something that he can’t change. he seems happy, if not, content with where his life has come to in the current state of the game.

this raises a question for me. between albedo’s love for rhinedottir and his place in mondstadt, if rhinedottir were to come back, what would he choose? what would come of it? i’m honestly really curious, and i hope they find something to do with their dynamic in the future (if rhinedottir even appears) because i think it has a lot of potential.

#(this is a re-write of an old post because i realized that i didn’t like it.) #genshin impact #genshin analysis #genshin theory #i need to find another character to write about #gi albedo #genshin lore #good morning btw

[diinferi]

LOCATION

[AFGHANISTAN] This is problematic. You're trapped in a cave currently being held by the Ten Rings terrorist organization, and they're all loaded with the latest in Stark Technology as a point after Stark escaped not too long ago. They have plans to execute you soon as an example... maybe you can do something with that box of scraps nearby.

IDENTITIES

[OPERATIVE] +You're damned good at what you do, and what you can do encompasses a lot of things. +Expect to tear up a lot of organizations if you're clever about it. -The second your cover is blown, people prepare for you.-Good luck having a normal life. You may as well be a ghost with all the false identities and backgrounds you have prepared for yourself. No matter what identity you choose, all of them are deadly. You work with precision and dedication on whatever task you're given. With so many identities, however, it may be difficult to decide which one is the real you. Tread carefully.

ABILITIES

[THEY CALL ME “STAR-LORD”] Using your real name can be so boring at times... or lacks the awe and intimidation you need. Fortunately, with this you can designate a code name or alias that people will know you by, and a great majority of people will associate that name with you. This does not guarantee they will call you that name, but they will know it's a name that belongs to you.

[VEHICULAR MANSLAUGHTER] You're a really good pilot, and a really good driver! It doesn't take you long to familiarize yourself with a new vehicle, though alien vehicles may take a fair amount of trial and error. Once you're moving however, you know how to get the most out of your new toy... as well as how to utilize it against your enemies. Whether using the weapons or just running them over, a vehicle is a tool of death in your hands.

[ARMED TO DISARM] When enemies don't perceive a threat, they're not as alert as they should be. Suckers. You've been taught in the ways of being friendly and polite, even if someone was pointing a gun at your head. You're charismatic enough to make friends easily, and you can show a friendly personality that many people would think is harmless... until you prove them wrong.

[WAY OF THE WIDOW] When someone mentions 'secret agent', it is often you they think of, in hushed whispers for fear that you may hear them. You have mastered a myriad of different skills needed... you know how to spot a tail and likewise tail someone, you know how to stay hidden, you know how to make cover stories, the works. Whether it's making your data trail run cold or tracking someone halfway across the planet or even how to seduce nearly any target, you know just how to get your foot in the door and slam it on the guy behind you. You're simply one of the best.

[A FUNNY THING HAPPENED] You are a walking bastion of skill and danger. Your martial art skills are so sharp that you could take on a group of trained soldiers single-handedly. Your marksman skills are enough that Annie Oakley would tip her hat in respect, and you could do that while using your weapons to gun-kata the aforementioned group. You've trained enough that you know how to utilize the environment to your surroundings, your situational awareness drastically increased as a result of learning to gauge situations of their dangers and what you could do to alleviate it. People would claim they were lucky to have NOT met you... now if only it could help you choose what kind of doughnut you wanted.

[SUPER SOLDIER] Well well WELL, aren't you a fine specimen? You've been bathed in Vita Radiation and have taken the eponymous Super Soldier Serum, and have found yourself enhanced as a result. You are at the very peak of both physical and mental human ability, even hitting the lower end of superhuman. Things like increased agility, speed, strength, mental calculation, memory, and more are all enhanced. This does not give you tactical knowledge or the courage to do things however, as this version does not impact your personality. You DO however, have the tools to achieve such things on your own now.

[ENHANCED SENSES] The world is so much more than sight, more than its colors or brightness. After training yourself and focusing, you have discovered this for yourself. Your four senses of hearing, touching, smelling, and tasting have all been increased to a level where you could effectively 'see' the world without sight. Feel air currents from a person attempting to punch you, or hear the heartbeat of a person from across the room, and more. Never be truly blind again.

EQUIPMENT

[TACTICAL SUIT] A standard bodysuit made of a polymer blend with ten layers of treated composite materials, allowing for state of the art protection. Default appearance of a S.H.I.E.L.D. logo and emblem, but you may choose a different style upon acquiring this.

[THUNDERSTICK] This police baton-sized weapon was designed by S.H.I.E.L.D. in order to release a wave of sonic energy designed to quickly incapacitate an attacking force. It works by releasing an explosive device in the air, but yours can also slam the ground to trigger it if need be.

[FABRIC SUIT] This custom fabric is pretty useful, having the consistency and lightweight feel of cloth but being capable of deflecting knife strikes or even small-caliber gunfire without any harm to the wearer. Even better, this outfit will come in any style or appearance you want when you purchase it, and will never be dirty.

[VIBRANIUM SAMPLE] Vibranium is an extremely rare element that possesses unique attributes. In a pure mass, vibranium forms a solid metal that is stronger than steel, but only a third of the weight, as well as being completely vibration absorbent. This means it can absorb the impacts of a great deal of attacks, but bear in mind high-energy attacks WILL do damage... especially if it is consistent. Purchasing this gets you a container a foot in length with some Wakandan Vibranium shards.

DRAWBACKS 

None

END CHOICE

[MOVE ON] There is more adventure waiting, and this universe is too small. You continue on your journey to the next world, with time on Earth still paused for you to explore and plan with no worries.

#marvel cinematic universe #mcu #jumpchain #cyoa #mcu oc #file: information #file: jumpchain #file: build #file: text #file: rasslédovatelʹnica

[minachan95-written-works-on-ao3]

Title: Something That You Cannot Dim and Take It Away...

Fandom: King of Fighters

Characters: Kyo Kusanagi, Iori Yagami

Pairing: Iori x Kyo

Summary:

[Trigger warning: past rape/non-con, past abuse and other dark themes] [This story was written for Iori's b-day on 2022/03/25] [Takes place after Iori rescued Kyo from the NESTS lab]

''<...> the brunette’s memory skips forward to the most horrific part, which he wishes to forget. Without realizing it, Kyo trembles and covers his face. <...>'' What kind of painful memories Kyo recalls? Is he left alone to deal with his inner fears? Read and find out.

AO3 Link

Some time has passed. Finally, the Kusanagi’s heir is waking up. As soon as the brunette opens his eyes, he briefly panics.

‘What place is this? Where am I? How did I get there?’ - He wonders while sitting up and looking around.

Knowing that he rests in the stranger’s bed, stresses him out. More so, he has no idea who dressed him into a blue pajama, and covered his body in the medical bandage and plaster.

Suddenly, the wave of memories flashes inside his head. It was such a vivid memory that he can even hear every little sound and feel that soreness on his wrists, ankles, and around the neck. Kyo rubs his wrists without realizing as he remembers what happened in the NESTS’ lab.

Lastly, his mind takes him into the darkest corners of his past.

_______________

Despite being restrained by the chains, he was desperate to escape and wished not to be left to die alone. However, thanks to his exhausted body, he couldn’t move. That’s right, the brunette was nothing more than testing subject to them. Although, it was too late for him to blame NESTS for messing up with his body.

Kyo was just a living tool. A thing which once fulfills its life purpose given by someone else, will be disposed like the rest of the nameless flesh dolls. The subjects do not need a free will and waste their energy on emotions. After all, all you need to sustain the subject alive is just keep it hydrated, nourished, and clean.

Of course, by far, the Kusanagi thought he could endure any physical and mental torture. The brunette refused to show them his pain and fear because he would lose.

Unfortunately, he hasn’t realized that the research will need more than his flesh and blood.

And thus, a few days later, a nightmare, which nearly broke the Kusanagi’s spirit, has begun.

He didn’t know how much time has passed since then. Perhaps a day, week, months. Such a concept as the ‘time’ ceased to exist to him.

Yet, was anything matter to him? After all, one group of scientists already observed him being violated by the machines countless times.

He never knew that he could make such shameful and lewd voices. Nor the way how his body reacted to the touch of certain devices.

At first, Kyo was disgusted and ashamed at how his body enjoys the stimulation and acted on how the instincts told him to do it.

Perhaps it didn’t matter whenever you have an intimate moment with someone whom you love, or you are getting screwed by strangers - the outcome might be the same. In one way or another, the primal nature would take you over.

He realized all this. Yet, the brunette still refused to embrace being a mindless creature, who would be much happier without his own will.

Despite that, the scientists screwed with him in any shape and form. However, Kyo kept refusing to give in to the dark thoughts, which slowly lure him into false comfort.

In the end, the NESTS stripped away all the brunette’s remains of his dignity and pride. He even lost the most toughest battle to an enemy, which he couldn’t handle alone.

However, one day, after another session of trials, he noticed something that broke his heart.

Kyo was lying like a doll, who did not have the strength left in his body to do anything. All he could do - was blankly staring at the window on his cell.

Behind the glass window, he could see a blonde scientist, who also wore a pair of glasses, talking to someone who looked exactly like him. More so, that replica was so innocent and happy to get treated like her son.

Perhaps, this clone got a decent treatment because he could adapt to his new environment. That’s right, Kyo thought that they created this artificial creature just to replace him and live his life.

It was when exhausted Kusanagi realized NESTS trapped him here for the rest of his days, and with no one knowing about his capture and, possibly, his death. Lastly, before passing out, tears ran down his face.

A few months later.

The flashing red light, the deafening noise of alert sirens, and the automated woman’s voice awaken Kyo. He could even hear how the carnal beast was calling his name.

 Suddenly, Iori destroyed the iron door and spotted him in a miserable position.

As both exchanged gazes, Kyo felt the unbearable sense of shame, which he thought was erased. Perhaps that’s why Iori stared at him with anger, disappointment, frustration… and sadness? However, both remained silent. Lastly, the redhead grabbed the chains and tore them apart one by one.

The brunette was in disbelief and couldn’t say a word, nor move. Perhaps it wasn’t Orochi’s blood running in Yagami’s veins that gave him such supernatural strength. No, his eyes were clear and untainted by the certain curse. Nevertheless, Kyo was in awe of what Iori was capable of at a desperate time, driven by the adrenaline.

 Fortunately, Iori’s reaction was faster, and Kyo collapses on him. However, no matter how the redhead demanded him to stand up, all the Kusanagi’s attempts ended with failure.

It can’t be helped. The brunette has been attached to these chains like a rag-doll for too long. Even his body slowly forgot how to move.

However, Iori didn’t waste the time. After quickly scanning the surroundings, he grabbed the long medical coat and covered Kyo.

___________

Back to the present, the brunette’s memory skips forward to the most horrific part, which he wishes to forget. Without realizing it, Kyo trembles and covers his face.

_____________

During their escape, a powerful enemy blocked their path. Even from its massive body build, it was clear as day that none of them had a chance to defeat this fellow. More importantly, this giant hunter was armored by the latest weapons produced by NESTS.

Of course, the Kusanagi knew it wasn’t worth risking their lives. Unfortunately, Yagami took this a challenge and threat, which could take the brunette from him.

Despite that, Kyo tried to drag him away. However, the redhead brushed him without even looking back. Iori’s eyes were burning with determination and pure rage towards that giant man.

Perhaps Yagami mistook his stone-cold stance as a taunt, and thus, he was provoked to attack.

Iori dashed and was about to use the claw strike. He was so confident that it would be enough to finish this mocking fool.

However, something was off… Just the moment before the strike, the hunter picked the metal bar. It briefly buzzed. As the metal bar hit the redhead’s chest, the high-voltage stroked him.

Lastly, as the gray smoke started coming out of Iori’s lifeless body, he collapsed.

For sure, like never in his life, it devastated Kyo. At that moment, he even forgot about the NESTS sent hunter, nor cared that he was the next target. Now he rushed towards the redhead’s corpse.

As Kyo desperately shook Iori’s senseless body, he begged him in tears for him to wake up and stop pretending to be asleep.

However, there was no sign of life, not even the slightest breath or pulse. The brunette couldn’t accept this. He denied the demise of Yagami and that it was his sacrifice.

Suddenly, the Kusanagi realized he had nothing to lose anymore. He didn’t care that the hunter observed him before killing him next.

Yet Kyo gave his last shot. He knew that soon he’ll join Yagami in whatever place he was now. So, he wanted to show the best he could.

Despite that, the orange flame wasn’t as bright and powerful as before getting kidnapped. He relied on it. After closing his eyes and igniting his palm, the brunette takes a deeper breath.

The giant man only smirked at this petite struggle.

As Kyo opened his eyes, he smashed the burning palm against Iori’s chest. After a few seconds, the redhead groaned and breathed. Soon enough, Yagami shakily opened his eyes.

The Kusanagi himself wasn’t sure whenever he was already insane or hallucinating. Yet, he had no time to shed tears of joy or to check on the redhead. Just before the hunter strikes Kyo, the whole place shook and crumble. Fortunately, they were separated from that giant man.

After Kyo grabbed Iori from behind, he shakily stood up and ran as far as his legs could carry him and Yagami. There was no time even for the mistakes or tripping over.

On their way, they encountered a lot of scattered corpses of the clones who barely resembled humans anymore. Either these artificial beings were shot down or injured, either crushed under the ruins. However, among them, there were a few scientists as well.

After making it through the closing iron gate, Kyo noticed a heavily injured clone who crawled through the same door.

For sure, that replica was too weak to make it through the closing gap. However, he was desperate to survive, and Kyo could see it.

Suddenly, the brunette was dragged away further, and now, pressed against Yagami like being hugged by him.

After Iori covers Kyo’s eyes and ears with his palms, he refused to let him go.

The Kusanagi could barely hear anything aside from the loud sirens and crumbling ruins. He couldn’t understand why Yagami did this.

Meanwhile, the redhead closed his eyes after hearing that agonizing scream followed by the sound of bones and flesh getting crushed.

Then, the brunette could feel how Iori hugged him more tightly. And thus, it was the last thing he could recall.

_________________

Unfortunately, Kyo cannot remember what happened after they escaped the lab, nor how he ended up in an unfamiliar apartment.

When he removes his wet palms from his face, he realizes he was crying all this time. After he wipes his face with the pajama’s sleeve, he gets startled by the familiar voice ‘‘Took your time, Kyo.’’.

There is no mistake. The brunette turns his head towards the direction of that voice, and stares in disbelief ‘‘Yagami? Is it you? You’re alive?… How? But what are you doing here?’’.

‘‘You still can’t figure out?’’ - The redhead replies with his arms crossed and him leaning against the door frame.

Without getting any answer from Kyo, who dumbfounded stares at him, Iori explains ‘‘This is my apartment, you fool. I take from your not the smartest look that you don’t remember passing out on me.’’.

As he approaches the brunette and sits on the bedside, he hears Kusanagi’s concerned question ‘‘Why did you bring me here? What do you want from me?’’.

However, Yagami ignores these questions and tells his story ‘‘After you show no signs of waking up soon, I carried you to my room. Even when I was done cleaning your wounds, you were still sleeping. So, I had to wait for at least three days until you woke up.’’.

As he stares at the confused Kusanagi, Iori asks him “Don’t go anywhere yet, got it? I’ll return in a few minutes.”.

“Wait. What have you planned, Yagami?” - The brunette gives him an insisting gaze.

“You’ll see. But in meantime, behave yourself.” - Iori backfires as he gets up.

For sure, no matter how hard Kyo tries to think, he cannot understand what the redhead is up to. But for now, he is left alone.

As time passes by, he becomes more and more anxious and unsure. He simply cannot stand that rising tension. ‘Just why does he take so long?’ - Kyo wonders.

However, just as he prepares to leave the bed, Yagami shows up while carrying something on the wooden tray.

Lastly, the redhead carefully places the tray near Kyo ‘‘Here. Just be careful with it.’’.

Even such a simple thing as a homemade chicken soup looks suspicious to the brunette ‘‘What is this? Are you planning to poison me?’’.

Yet, the redhead only face-palms and sighs ‘‘Just eat it. I don’t want you to pass out again.’’.

At first, Kyo doubtfully stares at Iori. However, after taking a spoon near the bowl, he adds ‘‘You better hope that you have put nothing funny into it…’’.

Just before taking the first spoon, the brunette feels under pressure when he is being watched ‘‘Why do you need to stare at me like that? You know, I can eat pretty fine and with no one else presence.’’.

However, since one pesky redhead refuses to leave, the Kusanagi ignores him.

And thus, he makes the most terrible mistake. That’s right, not only does he burn his tongue and his mouth, but also chokes on the soup.

Fortunately, Yagami’s reaction is faster, and he makes sure that the brunette won’t spill the rest on him, nor harm himself.

‘‘Do not rush while you eat. Or do I need to explain it like you were a child?’’ - Iori scolds the still coughing Kusanagi.

After a while, his coughing eased. Finally, Kyo backfires ‘‘You can’t blame for that. After all, this is the first time in a while when I can have actual food.’’.

‘‘What do you mean?’’ - Iori raises his one eye-brow.

The brunette honestly replies ‘‘After I became NESTS’ test subject, they would give me a daily food ratio. However, I kept refusing even to touch it. So, one day a group of scientists asked the security guards to lend them a hand. Hell, even when I tried to fight off these men, one of them punched me into the guts, and then they strapped me. Then one of these scientists inserted a needle and poured some kind of liquid inside me. I could feel how that cold thing could run in my veins, yet there wasn’t much I could do about it. And since then, such procedure was a part of my routine, and I have never even a single bite of proper food.’’

Once he finishes telling, Kyo gets genially surprised by seeing the redhead’s darkening face. For sure, he does not know why would Iori react this way.

‘‘Did I tell anything wrong? It’s not my fault that they had an advantage over me.’’ - Kusanagi answers in a slightly apologetic tone.

There is no answer from Yagami, who is drowned in his thoughts.

‘At least it explains why Kyo lost so much weight. Just what else those bastards did to him? If I didn’t pass out after sealing Orochi, none of this happened. I would instantly send those cowards to hell by just getting near to Kyo. Those fucking bastards took him from me…’ - Iori wonders, while regretting being so weak at the worst time possible.

Meanwhile, the brunette softens his gaze and places his hand on Yagami’s shoulder.

For sure, such a gesture makes the redhead widen his eyes. Yet, without facing the Kusanagi, he asks ‘‘What do you want? If you have anything to say, say it. Otherwise, I won’t disturb you.’’.

Just as he stands up, he can feel how the brunette pulls his sleeve.

This time, Kyo gets the redhead's attention, even if he did it without even realizing it. Of course, he can’t understand why he reaches out to Iori.

After withdrawing his hand, he defends himself ‘‘Like heck, I did this on purpose!’’.

As the Kusanagi lowers his gaze, he continues in a slightly shy tone ‘‘But could you stay for a bit longer? I won’t mind if you are here… I just want to make sure that I’m not dreaming and that once I wake up, I would be in the lab again.’’.

‘Does he really need to make such eyes? That fool… He won’t get away so easy.’ - Yagami thinks to himself.

Lastly, Iori replies in a chill tone as he can ‘‘Tsk. If that would help you to stay away from causing more problems. If you are still hungry or need anything else, I’ll get it, got it?’’.

Finally, after such a long time, Kyo can genially smile.

‘‘Aren’t you afraid that I can empty your fridge or even take over your place?~’’ - He teases Iori.

‘‘Get better first. Then, you can try to prove it and end up under my foot. But for now, eat, before it gets cold.’’ - Yagami backfires in the same tone.

‘‘Sure thing. So, let’s see if you can cook.’’ - The brunette replies.

For sure, no matter how it feels so unusual that once he finishes the soup, no one will drag him out of his cell and use him as an experimental guinea pig. However, Kyo tries to convince himself that it is alright to eat once without needing to worry about anything.

____________

Some time passes. It is a late evening. However, one certain redhead is sleepless. After getting up and leaving the couch, he checks on Kyo.

That’s right after Kyo finished his meal, Iori explained to him that he can stay in his bed for tonight while he would rest on the couch.

But for now, when he reaches his bedroom door, he silently opens it. After sneaking in, Iori notices that the Kusanagi curled under the blanket and peacefully slept.

Of course, seeing it is enough for the redhead. However, when he is about to leave, he hears the weird noises from the brunette’s side.

‘‘What a hell is wrong with him? Is he talking in his dreams?’’ - Yagami murmurs.

It can’t be helped, then. That’s right, who in the world knows what’s maybe happening to Kyo… Even if he is just having a nightmare, Iori cannot leave him like this.

When he gets close enough and sits on the bedside, the redhead removes the blanket cocoon from the Kusanagi.

Kyo is curled into a ball while turning his back to Yagami. More so, he is shaking like a leaf and time from time whining.

As Iori observes him more, he notices how the Kusanagi curls even more while hugging himself. Even that facial expression concerns the redhead. That’s right, Kyo looks like he is suffering from unbearable pain, and sweats in a cold sweat.

Perhaps he is sick. When Yagami places a couple of fingers on the brunette’s forehead, he is assured that is not a fever. Despite that, seeing the brunette having a nightmare disturbs him.

Even if in the past Iori kept telling that he’ll finish Kyo, seeing him now like this is a completely different thing.

Yagami cannot understand. Why does he feel bad for his rival?. It’s not what he wanted to happen. It’s not Kyo, whom he knows. Where is that stupid, arrogant brat who always keeps that smug face? Where is the little sparkle in his eyes?

He doesn’t like this at all.

However, the Kusanagi murmurs something. Eventually, Iori understands his singly words, which he speaks in a robotic and shaky voice.

Lastly, he can hear words like these ‘‘…No…please, no…I beg…just...return to…to me…Yagami…’’.

For sure, hearing his name in such a tone makes him feel numb inside. What nightmares Kyo is going through? How does the redhead get involved in them? Is he dreaming about the NESTS, Orochi’s blood curse, or something even worse? There are too many questions at the moment, which Iori cannot answer.

But for now, Yagami brushes the brunette’s forehead and his hair. While he keeps doing it, he silently observes the Kusanagi.

Eventually, Iori’s treatment gives good results - Kyo stops shaking and calms down. More so, he stops speaking in his sleep and slowly breathes.

For sure, Yagami gets relieved as well. However, for tonight, he stays close to the brunette. He wants to make sure that he is near if Kyo has another episode like this.

So, after covering the brunette and himself under the blanket, Iori returns to sleep. Lastly, he hopes that he’ll wake up earlier than Kyo. That’s because he doesn’t want the Kusanagi to have weird thoughts or assume anything. 

For now, Iori decides to leave tomorrow’s challenges for tomorrow. Besides, it will be just the beginning of Kyo’s slow rehabilitation.

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