#need her to be so nasty to him and for him to grovel back | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

artists-ally · 4 months

Text

{She Gets The Flowers, Right?} Reader x Lucien {Pt. 3}

Welp... here you go! I shall prepare to be boiled alive. Enjoy!

Word Count: 7,525

Warnings: you know the drill. Angst, language, hurt/comfort, nasty ass cliffhanger

Tagging: @bubybubsters @thelov3lybookworm @cyrygher @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @anuttellaa @crazylokonugget @thehighlordishere @acourtofbatboydreams @thisblogisaboutabook @fabulouslyflamboyant5 @venuseuripedis

Summary: Can everything be reconciled? Be repaired? Was it all just a big misunderstanding?

~~~~~~

READER POV

THAT MORNING...

There is nothing quite as startling as waking up to the sound of silence. In a life full of chaos, full of commotion and the constant buzz of energy, silence is unsettling. Especially in a house that should be full of laughter, taunting jokes, and easy smiles.

Anger seared my heart. Branded it black. Visions of heated conversations seep into mind, flooding my vision in red.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so mad in my life. The fact that he chose her over me. But I refused to let him disrespect me. I said hurtful things. And a twisted part of me likes the fact that they hurt him. I wanted him to suffer and grovel as much as I have been.

It’s petty, but I don’t care.

I push myself out of bed, dragging to the bathroom to sort myself out. I look in the mirror: skin? Dry. Eyes? Puffy. Lips? Swollen. I look tired. I am tired. And no amount of sleep will fix the bone deep ache of sheer disappointment.

Gods, he is still everywhere. Even with all his stuff gone; his toothbrush, his signature scent, his body soap and cufflinks sitting in the dish behind the faucet, somehow, he’s still here. Bits and pieces of him, of his once kind words…. All of it has turned sour.

A day has yet to go by where I don’t think of him. Of his laugh. Of the way his lip trembles when he cries.

I miss him.

And every day I hate myself more for it.

I shouldn’t miss him. What did he do besides torture me with the fact that he’ll never give me the time of day? Just like Elain was doing to him. I hope he’s happy. No, I don’t. That’s a lie. I hope he’s just as miserable as I am.

That’s even more of a lie.

I dress without thinking, my outfit the same as it has been for the past month and a half after opening the restaurant. The double breasted, black chefs coat with three stars embroidered over the heart. The slithering, embroidered black filigree on the shoulders, in a slightly different sheen to make them stand out. The pants had matching details over the pockets and down the side of the pant leg. My boots slip on and I grab my cap, fitting it over my head before heading out the door to get an early start.

Every fucking day since I kicked him out has been an early start. Anything to keep myself in this place we used to call home. I should move. Repaint at the least. Change something.

No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Everything is painfully the same.

When I need change the most, I can’t–for the life of me–decide what I want that change to be.

It doesn’t fucking matter.

He’ll always be there.

A murmur in the back of my head of what could’ve been.

Should I be this jealous? This aggravated over this whole thing? Am I overreacting? It’s not like he cheated on me, we weren’t even together. But I wanted him so bad I was willing to kick him out because he chose someone else over me. Oh Gods… I am a horrible-

No, I stop myself. Taking a deep breath as I step down off the porch, heading down the well beaten dirt path towards the city. Your feelings are valid. He hurt you. Badly. You didn’t overreact. Some would say it might’ve been an underreaction, or how could you have let it go on this long? You are allowed to be upset, for as long as you need. No one can tell you otherwise.

No one can tell you otherwise. I repeat the words over and over. I stare down at the cobblestone sidewalks, firsts clenched under my arms. I chew my lip. I clench my teeth. Things I always did, and things Lucien would try to get me to stop.

He’d put a hand on my shoulder. Or grab my hand to keep from digging my nails into my palms.

No one will ever know me as well as he did.

And that shatters my soul.

The thought of having to try to explain the events of my life to someone all over again… it’ll be impossible. Why couldn’t he have just loved me back?

Before I have time to realize where I’m going, I’m at Meliora. I see Ms. Immy bustling around. I wonder if she ever sleeps.

“Ah!” She cheers when I walk in the door. “My Spirit of the Gods! How are you dear?”

I give a half smile. “I’ve been better. Just the usual for me, please.”

“You are still missing your Fox?”

I nod. I watch as she pours the bubbling water into my mug, dipping the peppermint tea bag into the liquid. She’s so methodical. I’ve been here a thousand times, and she manages to make it the same way every time. Ms. Immy dusts the top with granules of sugar, adding a mint leaf to the top. She slides it in front of me as she grabs the chocolate chip muffin from the case.

“When are you going to talk to him?”

The question throws me for a loop. I answer honestly, “I wasn’t planning on ever seeing him again.”

She snorts. “I doubt that will hold true. He misses you too.”

“I don’t care.”

“Yes, you do.”

Yes. I do. “I don’t know how to forgive him.”

“Then don’t.”

I blink. What? “So, you think I should make amends with him, but not forgive him? How does that work?”

“He is your mate, no?” I nod. “Then you love him. Why is it so difficult to forgive someone you love?”

“I don’t know,” I bit my tongue. “I don’t deserve to be treated like that.”

“Yet you still want him back.”

Wow. I sound so pathetic. I cast my eyes down, tapping my fingers on the mug. “No matter how much I love him, I won’t let myself remain second place. I refuse to let myself go through to torture of always being picked next. Never first. No matter how much it hurts to stay away from him.”

She clicks her tongue, wiping down the counter behind her. Faintly, she hums a tune, its melody ringing in my ears. I feel like I knew it once. But I've been so caught up in everything that happened last month to bother trying to hold onto those types of memories.

I am losing myself.

“Do you know the meaning of Meliora?”

It’s the name of her cafe. I shrugged, “No, should I?”

“It means the place for better things, my Spirit. It is an ancient omen, an ancient oath of the Night Court. This is a Meliora, a place for better things. Seems like you could use some better things.”

“I have Latibule. I am living my dream of owning a restaurant. Better has come.”

“And it has gone,” Ms. Immy says. “Don’t fool yourself Yn. You are lost without Lucien. If he were to ask for your forgiveness, to give up Elain and all that has happened, would you accept him? If he said he only wanted you, would you have him?”

I grind my teeth together. The peppermint tea has turned to acid on my tongue. No one can tell you otherwise, no one can tell you otherwise…

“There are things in the world Yn, so precious and hard to find that it would be stupid to let it go. To trade it away over unintentional negligence. Lucien loves you. You love him. The two of you have been blessed by the Cauldron with a mate. Let it go to waste and suffer the consequences of never being able to fill that void. Let it rot your mind and heart for anyone else.”

I grind my teeth harder. Why does she insist on forgiving Lucien?

“After everything I did for him, after saving his life and rebuilding him from the ground up, he decides to repay me how? By forgetting about me and standing me up on the most important day of my life? Seems pretty unforgettable to me.”

“There is a great balance in this world. And to keep it, the Cauldron dishes out magic and illusions to offset it. Lucien got the short end of the stick and got more than he could handle.”

“Well that's not my fault.”

“No,” she shakes her head. “But it is your problem. Yn, all I’m suggesting is you give him a chance. There is no telling what will happen between you two if you don’t try.”

“I don’t want to try, what if I make things worse? What if it doesn’t work out?”

“But what if it does?” _____

But what if it does? I have been doing nothing all service besides thinking what Ms. Immy last said to me. But what if it does? I start spiriling with questions after that.

What if it does work out? Will I be able to fully trust that he won’t run back to Elaine? If it doesn't, will I just spend the rest of my life trying to find him in everyone else? Will I ever find someone else? How can I be so sure that he’ll want me in his life after I’ve kicked him out? If I see him, will I want to punch him in the face? Could I even stomach looking at him? Would I just puke from nerves and anger? Should I even bother? What if I never get the chance to-

“Yn, there is a table seated in section 8 for you,” my lovely hostess, Esmira, calls from the window.

“I’ve got six pans on right now, Es. I can’t just take a table. Where are Karos and Daxillion? They’re supposed to have a handle on this right now.”

“We’ve got a full house. It’s the High Lord and Lady, as well as her sister and the General.”

Shit. It’s midweek, why do we have a full house? Especially at lunch. From what I’ve heard amongst my staff's gossip, Lucien has been living at his house. I don’t want to see anyone. Especially someone who’s been caring for him.

“Okay… okay fine I’ll take the table. Go take their drink orders and I’ll be right back. Esro, I need you to cover my station in between checks.”

“Heard,” he calls back dutifully. He always takes the shit I give him and dusts it with gold. I should give him a raise.

I jog to the supply closet where I have an extra uniform stashed in case of an emergency. I change quickly, taking my cap off and fluffing out my hair. Not bad but… not great. I still look so tired.

Esmira scampers into the bathroom to hand me their drink list. A bottle of wine and water for the table. Easy enough.

Racking the glasses onto the carrier, I haul the bottle of wine and decanter of water to the table, plastering a courageous smile on my lips. Who knows if it’s actually convincing.

“Evening, my High Lord and Lady,” I greet. “Cassian and-” Elain. It’s Elain. What is she doing- “Elain. Good to see you out and-”

“You don’t have to pretend to be excited to see me. I know you’re not. I ruined your relationship with Lucien.”

Well, shit okay guess this is happening now. What do I say? “He made a choice, it’s not your fault.” I settled on.

But it is your problem… screw you Ms. Immy.

She looks hesitantly to the High Lord, who gives a firm nod. She sighs. “I’ve tried to stop him from pursuing me for months. He still comes back. I share no bond with the firehead.”

Firehead, ha! Why had I never thought of that one?

I just press my lips together, fighting off the prickle in my nose and throat. “Can I take your meal orders? Anything you’d like to start with?”

“He misses you, Yn.” Rhysand spoke. His violet eyes swirling with stars. “Is there a chance you’ll talk to him?”

I feel like such an outsider looking at the Inner Circle. There were so many outcomes I could’ve had in Velaris. I could’ve been a part of their Court, not just an inhabitant. But I chose the path my heart wanted, and lost the thing it needed most.

I swipe the tear away as fast as it falls.

“I’ll bring a round of bread for the table.” And I head off.

____

After I had served them their meals, bid them farewell with a pitiful look on the High Lords face, the room was a lost less crowded.

Now I’m starting to wonder if we were meant to say goodbye. Maybe there is something salvageable. But I don’t want to shred myself to pieces for a maybe. Even he is not worthy of my self destruction.

But what if it does?

“Hello?” A sultry voice says from behind me. I rack the polished pint glass and turn over my shoulder, greeted with a handsome face. Too handsome… curse these high fae. He’s got rippling muscles as he crosses his arms over his chest, eyes a vibrant, ashy caramel. And his hair… “I’m looking for Yn?”

What does he want? “Is there something I can help you with?”

“For once, my brother wasn’t reserved in his descriptions.”

What? His brother? I stare at the male, taking in his sharp nose, those eyes like fire, his hair… oh Gods-

“I’m Lucien’s brother, Eris.”

I stay silent, taking in his face. Fuck, there is a lot of Lucien there. More than I’d like to see. They have the same eyes and hair. And it hurts to see so much of him in someone else.

“Now, I don’t particularly care that much about who you are-”

Charming.

“-but I do know you made my brother happy. At one point or another. I also don’t care what happened between the two of you, but it must’ve been bad.”

“Leave.”

“Whether or not you talk to my sorry bastard brother means nothing to me. But if I have to deal with one more Court meeting where Rhys and his brute ask me if I’ve talked to him, I will rip off my own ears.”

“I asked you to leave my restaurant.”

“Is this how you treat all your customers?”

I narrowed my eyes, “You are not a customer, you haven’t ordered anything. So have a good day, Eris.”

“I’ll take a pint of ale,” he smirks. Smirks, like I’ve got all the time in the world to listen to him babble about how much he wants me to talk to Lucien.

With a viscous yank, I pull off the glass I just put away and fix it under the tap. I debate spitting in it. That most certainly would not end well for me or my restaurant. I’ve already had one Vanserra ruin my life, I don’t need another to ruin the only hope I have left.

I slap the glass down in front of him, turning around to finish unloading the clean dishes from the drying racks.

“So,” he slurps his drink, “when are you going to fix your shit with Lucien?”

“I’m not.”

“Why not?”

“Because he hasn’t earned my forgiveness.”

“What would it take?”

“Doesn’t matter. I won’t forgive him.” Can he stop asking me so many fucking questions? I just want to clean up, shut down the kitchen, hand out todays tips and go the fuck home.

“Why?”

My hands came down on the steel counter, rattling plates and saucers. “Why are you so fucking concerned with something that isn’t your problem?”

He goes quiet for a second, and I’m blessed with a moment of peace from his irritating voice. “Because, despite being nothing but a pain in my ass, he’s still my brother. And he’s miserable. And you’re the reason why.”

“No,” I snapped, ready to hurl a glass at his thick fucking skull. “He’s the reason he’s miserable. He did all the damage on his own. All I did was ask him to be there for me, and he threw me aside like a stray cat begging for a warm meal.”

“What did he do?”

“It’s none of your business, Eris. Go away, the bar is closing.”

“I still have a tab open.”

“Then come back tomorrow and pay it.”

“But I’ll be away.”

“Then it’s on the house,” I sighed, too exhausted to deal with this. “Just go. Please.”

“As soon as you tell me what he did I’ll-”

“He fucking ruined me, thats what he did.” Thank god the restaurant was empty or else the whole city would know that I’ve been completely shattered by Lucien Vanserra. Who am I kidding, I’m sure everyone already does. “All I asked was that he be there for me the day I opened my restaurant.”

Eris puts his palms up, “well? Where was he?”

“Where do you think?” The glare I sent him made him back off.

“Oh…”

I scoff, “yeah, oh. I gave up everything for him. My family, my home, my life to restore him after he fled to the Spring Court. I just wanted his support. And he was busy with a female who would rather be tortured than in his presence.”

“I don’t think it’s fair to blame Elain for-”

“I wasn’t blaming Elain,” I corrected. “Lucien let me down. Unforgivably. That's the end of it. I don’t want an apology from him, it won’t do anything for me.”

Eris let out a long sigh. “Look, I understand that he hurt you. I’m not trying to invalidate your feelings. He fucked up. Point blank. He’ll never be able to take back what he did and said. But is there any way that the two of you may be able to move on?”

“Move on?” I scoffed, a cruel laugh escaping me. “Move on? Eris, I confessed to him that I am his mate, and he told me I was selfish because I wasn’t happy about him and Elain.”

“Were you?”

“Of course I was,” I ran my palms over my face. “Did it hurt knowing he’d never look at me like that? Yes, but I was prepared to live with it if it meant that he got to live a happy, fulfilled life. I didn’t care who it was, it was the fact that he forgot all about me. On more than one occasion. Menu designs, recipe tastings, wine tastings… all of it. He missed all of it to go be with her.”

“So you’re jealous?”

It took everything inside me to not rear up and smack him across the face. Who does this asshole think he is? Instead of possibly earning myself more trouble, I take his glass of ale off the counter, dump it, and rinse the glass.

“I wasn’t done with-”

“Well, you’re done now. Thank you for dining with Latibule, but the restaurant is officially closed. See yourself out.”

Eris clicks his tongue, pushing off the bar. The rustling of his clothes chafes together as he walks away. “Lucien cares about you, Yn. From the very few mentions of you he’s shared, I can tell he thinks highly of you, no matter what you may think.”

Then the door snaps closed, and I’m left with nothing but a pulse in my ear and tears in my eyes.

____

After a quick mop in the kitchen I shut off all the lights and lock the front door. As I’m walking down the street, a thick, crackling scent hits me. And my stomach churns. It’s familiar, part of it still lingering in my house. But this one is more… just more.

“Eris, leave me alone.”

“I did a lap around the block, and I was thinking-”

“Hope you didn’t hurt yourself too bad.”

Eris chuckles, then laughs. “Feisty, I can see why Lucien would like you. Just give him a chance.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Why are you Autumn Court fae so fucking dense?”

“Just be thankful it was me and not my father who came to see you, then you’d really see dense.”

“Please,” I rolled my eyes. “If I ever came face to face with that bastard I’d do a lot more than hurl words at him. I’m not particularly fond of you either, so be careful how you speak to me.”

“What if I arranged a meeting for the both of you? To talk things out and see if there is any common ground to be found,” Eris suggested, falling in stride with me as I walked up the path, back towards home.

“Gonna pass on that one. If I wanted to ‘arrange a meeting’, I would’ve already done it. I don’t need Lucien's big, scary older brother to do it for me,” I mocked.

“You think I’m scary?” He smiled.

“I think you’re annoying and disrespectful.”

“A lot of the High Lords of Prythian would agree, try not to be so original.”

Don’t rip out his eyes, don’t rip out his eyes. He’s just trying to get under your skin, don’t let him win.

“Come to think of it, there is one High Lord in particular who seems to agree with this idea of trying to get you and Lucien back together.”

“If you even think about dragging Rhysand into this-”

“He approached me,” Eris admits. “He’s sick of Lucien moping around the Town House all the time.”

“Then tell him my advice is to kick him out,” I bit out, more than tired of this conversation. “And stop following me, Eris. Go back to whatever hole you crawled out of.”

“But I have to make sure you get home safe, Lucien would have my head if something happened to you,” Eris reasons, knocking his shoulder into mine.

“Is there an imminent threat against my life, Eris Vanserra?”

“No?”

“Then there is no need for you to walk me home.”

“But if there was an imminent threat, I would be able to protect you,” Eris smiled, and curse me… it’s a nice smile. I glare up at him, but he just smirks back.

I decided to seal my lips. If I don’t respond, he can’t get any more information out of me.

“Just think about this for a minute: if you decide to have a conversation, one of two things is going to happen. You’re either going to confirm everything you already know; he’s an uncaring, forgetful bastard who doesn’t give a shit about you or the lives you two have built together. Or, you’re going to realize the exact opposite; that he does care, and it was all a misunderstanding. And that he does care about the life the two of you have built together.”

I can’t be bothered to care about what he wants anymore. I’ve spent too much of my life caring for his every waking need. When is it my turn?

“You are his mate, Yn. It goes against every instinct in your body to reject him. Why do you keep fighting yourself on what your heart wants?”

Because he betrayed me. He completely broke my trust, ruined my image of him in one night. Why does no one understand that?

“I get it, he hurt you or whatever, but are you really going to risk the chance of eternity together with him because of one mistake?”

He and Ms. Immy would get along well. And it wasn’t just one fucking mistake, it was about seventeen. Apologies don’t mean a thing if you don’t ever fix what you did wrong. I can see my house, just a few hundred yards away. I can slam the door in his fucking face and spend the rest of my night doing anything but thinking about Lucien.

“Yn, just answer me,” Eris demands. “I know there isn’t anyone you’ve talked to.”

“No you don’t.”

“Have you talked with anyone about this?” I stay quiet. “Exactly, you need to release this. To scream and shout and yell-”

“I’ve tried that. Didn’t do anything for me.”

“Have you punched anything? I like doing that when I’m mad,” Eris snickered.

I just rolled my eyes. “I’m about to punch something soon.” He takes a step back as I finally reach my door. I unlock it and push it open, kicking off my boots at the door. I have no reason to be bitter to Eris. he’s just trying to help, trying to be there for his brother. Now, whether or not he’s doing it in the best way is certainly debatable. But at least he’s trying. I sigh, feeling incredibly defeated. “Would you like a drink?”

His smile is softer, and he gives a nod, following me inside.

As I make us a drink, he looks around the kitchen and the living room.

“Gods it looks just like the Autumn Court in here,” he chuckles, picking up a pillow from one of the chairs.

“Yeah, Lucien did most of the decorating.”

“It’s gotta be difficult to see it every day.”

I bite back a sob, “You have no idea.”

“I know I am not the easiest person to get along with, or the most…tender, but if you are hurting this bad, then I know Luc must’ve been special to you. And you special to him. So, if there is anything I can do, tell me.”

As I slid the glass across the counter, I stared at my hands. Would talking about this really make a difference? I just feel like it keeps opening up old wounds without giving them the time to heal. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to move on.”

Eris looks at me, thick brows knitted together. “Because you miss him?”

As much as it hurts to admit, I nod. “So fucking much, Eris.”

“Now, do you miss him, or just having someone to share a space with?”

I blink up to meet his eyes, the ashy-caramel irises full of so much life. “I miss him. I don’t know when he started distancing from me, but I clearly didn’t notice it quick enough. I started to miss his smile first. He stopped laughing for a while after he met Elain. The creases between his eyes replaced those around his mouth.”

“Yn-”

“He started being late to everything next. He would apologize but… they weren’t sincere. I tried not to be hurt by it but… I don’t know. I thought maybe it had to do with stuff happening from the Spring Court and with Tamlin. Doesn’t matter, it just kept getting worse. He’d only talk about Elain, ask for advice on what to do since ‘I was a female’.”

“Oh Lucien…” Eris rubs his eyes. “Even for him that's low.”

“Yeah. I don’t know why I didn’t snap earlier. Part of me wanted to hold onto something I knew I couldn’t have. Then came the grand opening and once he was late for that?” I shook my head, biting my lips so as to not sob in front of Eris. “Nothing he could’ve done would’ve made up for that.”

I don’t know why I’m opening up to Eris. He’s probably just going to relay it word for word back to Lucien. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.

“None of what he did is excusable,” Eris says. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t understand. He wanted to spend time with his mate. He just wanted her to know that someone was there for her. But did he do it the right way? Absolutely not. And he fucked up, really bad.”

“Can I give you something?”

Eris just stared blankly at me. “What?”

“Just stay here for a moment,” I set my glass down, charging up the stairs. It’s been burning a hole in the bottom of my closet since I found it a few weeks ago. The lump of midnight blue fabric was a crumpled mess, but his scent still lingered on it.

I held it up to my nose. Inhaling deep. It’s time to let go.

As I stand in front of Eris, I hold out the shirt. My throat is like liquid iron. “Give this back to him, will you? It was one of his favorites.”

This shirt… this god damned shirt. It always looked so good on him. With the color of his skin and the tone of his hair. All the jewel tones made him look marvelous, but there was something about the teal color. Tears slid onto my cheeks. The first night he wore this shirt was when Rhysand and Cassian took him out to dinner. “To try and get to know me better,” Lucien said. He thought they were going to interrogate him. But he wore this shirt with dark blue pants and black leather boots. His hair was braided away from his face… I braided it back away from his face.

Eris’s hand on my cheek pulls me out of the memory and into his eyes. “Did you keep this, knowing it was his favorite, hoping one day he’d come back looking for it?”

The fact that he figured it out so easily made my blood run cold. I tried to answer, but the sound of the door creaking open made me forget what I was going to say.

My heart dropped.

Eris’s hand was frozen on my cheek.

Lucien dead still in the doorway. What is he doing here?

Eris clears his throat, taking the warmth of his hand as he drops it to his side. “Brother, perfect timing.” Perfect timing? Did he- “No, I didn’t plan this, Yn. Though I respect you for thinking me so clever.” Eris turned me, blocking my view of Lucien. He folded the wrinkled shirt in my palms. “This is your chance.”

And then he left. He slipped around Lucien with a subtle glare and shut the door behind him.

Lucien looks… he looks so…

“I thought you would be at the restaurant,” he spoke, voice low and cool. “I can came back-”

“What did you want?” I asked, curious as to why he’d be back here ever again.

“Actually I wanted um… I came here for that shirt.”

Oh. Oh. My heart hammered against my ribs. “Yeah, yeah, take it. I found it doing laundry a bit ago.”

Lucien crosses the threshold of the room and takes it from me. I’m waiting for him to ask me about Eris. To ask about how I’ve been. Or to apologize. Gods Luc, please say something.

“I see you met my brother. What did he want?”

Here we go. “He walked me home from Latibule.”

“Oh,” he nods. “Well, I hope he wasn’t too much of a pain.”

I snicker, but refrain from further details. “You look well.”

He did, he looked healthy. His arms and chest fill out his shirt in a way they never used to.

“I’ve been training with Cassian for a while,” he explained. That’ll do it, I guess.

“Sounds exhausting.”

He gives a faint chuckle, “It’s interesting.”

Then we just look at each other. My heart swells, and crashes down. My fingers and toes go numb and my head feels lighter. I want him to stop looking at me so intently, yet I don’t want him to leave. Ever again. I want him to stay here and build a home with me. A new home with new memories and new adventures. But the logical part of me knows it’ll never quite be the same.

“Why was Eris here?”

“I told you he walked me home from Latibule.” He gave me a look that screamed ‘I’m not buying that shit’. I must have no resolve because I caved instantly. “He came and found me to talk about you.”

I’ve never seen Lucien look so worried in my seventy years of knowing him. “Why?”

“He wanted to know if I’d ever forgive you. Apparently he’s tired of dealing with Rhysand begging him to talk to you so he came to me.”

“Yn,” Lucien’s eyes sulk, “If I had known Eris would’ve found you I would've just talked to him. I just wanted him gone and away from me. I didn’t mean to drag you further into this.”

“It’s fine, he only mildly insulted me. I see where you get it from.” It was a low blow, but seeing him wince made me feel a bit better. It was petty. But cathartic.

Silence stretched between us. Wrapping around me like a pit viper after delivering a lethal dose of venom to its prey. It constricted and constricted and constricted-

“I love you.”

I almost looked around the room to see if someone else spoke. But it was his mouth that moved, and it was his voice that sang.

“What?”

“I love you, Yn.”

“No-”

“I love you,” he gasps, tears filling his eyes. “I-I… I am so in love with you.”

“Lucien stop,” I beg, that numbness spreading up my arms and calves.

“I am so so fucking sorry for the way I treated you. You are so undeserving of that after all that you did for me. I was selfish and blinded by what I thought I wanted. You were right, Yn. About everything. I never once considered that it could be you because I just always knew you’d be in my life. I never thought that I’d lose you but when I did I… I broke. I can’t live without you. I need you. I love you.”

“You don’t get to decide that you want me and then waltz back into my life. That is not how this works.”

“Please Yn just give me a chance to apologize and make things right.”

“No,” I shouted, anger leaching into my tone. “No, I gave you one too many chances I think. I have given you too much, Lucien. More than enough for one lifetime and you're just now realizing that you want me back? ”

“I’ve always known I’ve loved you Yn. I just didn't understand how much. Or in what way. And I know that’s my fault and my problem. In some way I was cursed by the cauldron to have two mates. But it blessed me with one who cared enough about me to take my broken spirit and make it whole again.”

“Good luck finding someone to do it again because it will not be me this time.” I crossed my arms over my chest, turning away from him.

“Yn please just- just let me speak. I truly didn’t mean to hurt you. I got so caught up in the fact that I finally had a choice in this world that I forgot to think about everything else in my life. I never meant for you to feel anything but loved and appreciated.”

“Lucien, you somehow managed to achieve everything you meant not to do.”

A sob tore through Lucien. And one tore through me too. “You never gave up on me, not once. From day one you have always believed in me, what happened? What changed?”

“You’re complete and utter recognition of my existence changed, Lucien!” I screamed, not caring who heard me. “Ever since the war ended you haven’t paid me the closest bit of real, undivided attention. You only spoke to me if it was about Elain, what dinner was going to be, or if I had gotten the next project done on the restaurant. But not once did you ask me how I was doing or if I wanted to go out for a fun night. I just faded away into the back of your mind.”

My blood curled against my bone while I waited for a response. He stared at the floor, eyes darting around and around.

“I’m so so so sorry, Yn.”

“I’m sure you are.” More empty apologies

“How do I fix this? Tell me what to do. I’ll do fucking anything you want just tell me- please Yn I can’t leave here without saying I gave us every chance we had-”

“And I told you I gave you one too many chances to apologize.”

I refuse to be walked all over. I refuse to be second place. I refuse to be treated as anything but a first priority. My heart is too big sometimes, and I’ve been known to forgive under less likely circumstances, but this is where I draw the line.

Lucien gets down on his knees. “Please, my Yn. I have nothing without you. You are entwined in every corner and crevice of my soul. I know I’m undeserving of you. But somewhere deep down I think you still love me. Even if you hate me right now, and I do not blame you. I have been an awful person-”

“Lucien please don’t-” my throat feels like it’s swelling closed.

“-but I cannot see a future without you in it. If I don’t have you by my side, then all of this is useless. All these heartbeats, all these breaths of oxygen are worthless without you giving me a reason to have them.”

I try to get a grip on the world spinning around me, but it’s of no use. “Lucien get up.”

“No,” he shakes his head, pieces of his hair falling loose to frame his face. In times like these I would once comfort him. Place my hands on his cheeks and tell him how worthy he is of love and protection. And here he is, trying to do the same for me. “No, I need you to listen to me.”

“I don’t wanna hear what you have to say.”

“I don’t care. I have to tell you otherwise I might burn alive. I have never regretted a day more in my life than that night a month and a half ago. It haunts my every waking nightmare. On repeat, every night for me to relive and beat myself up over. I deserve every second of it. You’re right, I did discard you to the side like you were nothing. And I sweat my life on the Cauldron that I didn’t mean to do it. I didn’t know I was doing it until you pointed it out to me. Then I just… I fell apart.

“I had no idea what to do, where to go. Ask anyone, for weeks I was unable to get out of bed after I came and got my stuff from here. The only person I talked to was Ms. Immy. Even she knew about it. She told me to respect your wishes, to not neglect them like I had neglected you in the past and I might have hope. So as hard as it was, I stayed away. Because I didn’t want to make things worse than they already were. Ms. Immy told me it wasn’t my fault that I neglected you- well… it was, but- but it was now my problem. To try and fix it. And she’s right, you’re right. Fucking everyone is right. I just want to fix this with you.”

It’s not your fault, but it is your problem. Damn that wise hag.

My muscles are so taught they begin to ache. I can’t handle this, I don’t want to handle this. I want him gone- no… no I want him to stay and tell me how much he’s fucked up. To validate me because he spent so much time doing the opposite.

“What if I don’t want you to fix things?” I asked. “What if I wanted you to leave and never come back?”

“That’s not an option. Being out of your life has never been an option. I want you more than anything I could think of. I am going to fix this between us one way or another, today, tomorrow, or a hundred years from now. But I will never stop trying because I love you.”

“Don’t say that,” I plead, turning away from him. His hand wrapped around my forearm, locking me in place. “Let go of me. Now.”

“Not until you give me a legit reason why we cannot fix what we have. Yn, you have given your entire life to me. Let me return all those years back to you.”

“I don’t want you t-”

“You don’t have to forgive me today, but let me try to make it up to you. My Spirit of the Gods, who cares so much more about the lives of others than her own. Let me be the one who cares about you. Let me bear the weight of your burdens.”

“Lucine stop talking.”

“No,” he roared, shaking his head. “I need you to understand that I won’t stop trying to fix things with you no matter how much you hate me. I love you too much to let you slip through my fingers. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I blew off the most important night of your life. Through everything, you were there for me, and I didn’t return the favor when it mattered most. You worked so fucking hard on Latibue, Yn. And I am so unbelievably proud of you. And I’m sorry I wasn’t there to support you.”

“For Cauldron's sake, Lucien, shut up.”

“Why are you refusing to listen to anything I have to say?”

“Because if you say one more Gods damned thing about how much you love me and how fucking sorry you are, I might just forgive you and I am not ready to forgive you because I am still livid with you!” The confession tears from my lungs. I heave for a breath, carefully watching Lucien. “I’m not ready to be comforted by someone who hurt me so badly.”

“Then I’ll give you time,” Lucien’s eyes soften as he stands. “I can live with you being angry at me, but I can’t live without you at all.”

“I can’t possibly know how long that’ll take.”

“I don’t care how long it’ll take,” he shrugs. “I’ll wait until our souls pass again if I have to.”

My mind is too cluttered. My heart in too many shards. “You don’t need to wait for me. I’ll be fine on my own.”

“I know you will,” he smiles. Oh how I’ve missed his smile. His smile. “But that doesn’t mean you need to be.”

He wants to fix things, he was begging on his knees for you to listen to him. He’s okay with you being angry at him as long as you give him a chance. He loves you. He loves you back. After all these years, everything you’ve been waiting for… it’s right in front of you. Even if it hurts, even if you’re scared it is better to do it afraid then not at all.

I broke down into tears, my chest wracked with sobs. All this locked up pain and indignation exploding out at once. And Lucien is right there to keep me from falling. “Shh, Yn it’s okay,” he purrs, holding me so tight I can’t breathe. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

I have spent so long loving this boy, begging him silently to love me back. And here he is… why can’t I find the space inside me to let him in?

“Lucien…”

“My Yn,” he breathes, cradling my head to his chest.

I take a deep breath. “I love you.”

I feel his body relax.

“And I think you should leave.”

His body goes rigid. He pulls away, hands reaching to cup my face, but settling on the backs of my arms. “W-What? Why do you-”

“If you spent all this time waiting for it to be the right moment to make peace with me but never taking the opportunity then it’s too late.”

“Yn please- this is me taking the opportunity.”

“No,” I shake my head, sniffling. “This was just a coincidence. You didn't come here with the intention of making amends. You came here just to get a shirt. So here,” I picked up the shirt, shoving it in his chest. “Take it. And go.”

“Wait-” I began to push him to the door. “Yn wait! Yes I came here to get my shirt. No, I didn’t think you’d be here. But you were. So I took a chance. I took a risk for you.”

“Do you really think I’m so naive?” I scoffed, opening the door and shoving him through, rougher than I intended. “If you want me, then you’re going to have to do a lot better than getting down on your knees and saying you love me.”

“What do you want me to do? I’ll do anything, anything.”

“If you need me to tell you, then there’s no hope for us.”

He stares at me, eyes begging, pleading, hoping and praying that I’ll just tell him. Despite the slight sweat on my skin, my body feels calm. Powerful. I feel in control.

Then his lips are on mine, and any sense of reality I have comes crashing down.

#acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar fanfic #lucien acotar #lucien vanserra #lucien x reader #lucien x you

166 notes · View notes

hp-hcs · 8 months

Text

(Fine, I’ll do it my damn self: part 5 of my silly lil mlm stories <3)

tmr is just babygirl i don’t make the rules

Watercolors (Chapter One) — tom riddle x male! artistic! hufflepuff! reader

he could manipulate and possess me thus irreversibly changing my trust in people despite it never being mentioned again and i would thank him

yk, i absolutely love chamber of secrets, but who starts a new diary (obtained under questionable circumstances) with ‘my name is’?

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Tom Marvolo Riddle had been stuck inside of his diary since he was sixteen years old.

The diary itself, inside, was a perfect replica of Hogwarts, the boundaries stretching out well into the Forbidden Forest. Perfect, except for the fact that it was made solely of parchment and ink, and was completely devoid of color or life.

Tom hated the color of parchment.

The diary passed hands many times over the five subsequent decades. First there was the pathetic, sniveling man—the Malfoy sycophant—who all but groveled at Tom’s feet (metaphorically, of course).

Next was the littlest Weasley, the redheaded girl who bored Tom to (again, metaphorical) death. He could only pretend to be interested in how Dean Thomas held the door open for her so many times before he wanted to bash his head into one of the walls.

(He tried, once. The parchment just ripped and left him with a nasty paper-cut on his forehead. Tom missed the red of blood. Now, he bled only black, dripping ink.)

Then, Harry Potter, the boy fated to defeat him, (or whatever) who turned out to be really quite sweet. As a last fuck you to whom he became in the future, Tom aided Harry in coming out to the littlest Weasley’s mother.

That’ll show Lord Voldemort, the dipshit, Tom thought gleefully.

Eventually though, even lovely Harry became more distant, his newly rediscovered godfather being the rightful center of his attention. Tom supposed he might have been jealous of the acquitted Black in another life, but after fifty years of loneliness he understood the yearning for living, breathing friends rather than just paper that writes back, as Little Weasley once called him.

Then, out of nowhere, came the Hufflepuff boy with a tin of watercolors and an eye for the overlooked.

The first thing this wondrous creature made for Tom was a little stone cottage, complete with a warm hearth, a garden of pumpkins and berries, and an idyllic curl of smoke from the chimney. The cottage sat near the edge of the forest, wonderfully secluded and alive.

Tom had watched as gentle sweeps of a brush, suspended in midair, created a home. One that existed in both the physical diary and the hellish paper prison Tom resided in.

Everything existed.

The warm, brown thatched roof, the colorfully patterned bedspread, and even a fireplace.

When the masterpiece was complete, Tom, although he would never admit it, gorged himself on the garden’s sweet huckleberries and sour raspberries. Afterward, he explored his new house, even going so far as to stick his hand into the flames of the fire.

(They weren’t real. They felt like nothing more than a faint warmth against his skin. Disappointing, Tom supposed. But probably a safety hazard.)

Then he curled up in the big bed, under the vibrant bedspread, and closed his eyes.

For the first time in fifty years, Tom slept.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Chapter Two

i need you all to know that the original title for this was “Tom Riddle is a man-whore(crux)??? (NOT CLICKBAIT)” so-

#harry potter #fuck jkr #hp #hp x male reader #x male reader #tom riddle #tmrhp #tom riddle x male reader #horcrux #no but seriously if tom didn’t hate muggle stuff so much i’d say that he could hit me with his car but yk he DOESNT OWN ONE #x reader #tom riddle x reader

281 notes · View notes

oh-for-fic-sake-library · 2 years

Text

A Suitable Alternative

Masterlist

Summary: When the inquisitors are caught assaulting Lord Vaders darling little engineer two things happen. 1. Vader swiflty teaches his underlings a lesson. And 2. The sith lord finally puts his little one in her place. Which unbeknownst to her is beside him.

Warnings: yandere!vader, Suitless!Vader (as in not clinically needed) , possessive!Vader, attempted sexual assault, swearing, canonical violence, threats, coercive & obsessive behaviour, semi forced relationship.

A/N: *insert ben affleck smoking meme here* Like what do i say about this? Incase you didnt already know I love a dark yandere tropes. Powerful Posessive men who will fuck up anyone who touches their darling. So yeah. Backtrack about a week i decided to pop starwars prequel on for background noise then kind of... watched it, then watched Kenobi. Anakin is prety much the definition of a soft obsessive yandere. And vader? Psychotic yandere. And well this is what you get, i genuinely couldnt help it. Enjoy my fuckery while i go yeet myself off a bridge and look for my moral compass. 👋😀

You whined, squirming uncomfortably your torso pressed tightly to the table. Tears blurred your vision as you struggled, the chubby face of your tormenter split into a wide grotesque grin. He was seated infront of you pleased with himself. Chuckling to himself before leaning back as he used the force to hold your frail form bent over the table, leaving you vulnerable to the others in the room.

"Aww dont cry, isnt this what you like? The power? The invisible holding you in position? Im sure your used to this? Being bent over like a little bitch" he teased, the others chuckled. Even the gaurds snickered at you. You hissed shaking your head still desperately fighting the force that held you still. But it was no use you were stuck.

"N-no i told you! Theres nothing; stop it! Please!" You cried out, not above begging the fifth brother for some leniency. You knew that your arrival had put a few noses out of joint. Many who spent their lives groveling at the feet of lord vader envied you. The interest the lord had in you roused jealousy and anger.

It wasnt like you had done anything, the terrifying male just didn't ignore you as he did others, nor did he threaten or scold you. Youd done nothing to earn a scolding. Perhaps that was the problem? Because your dealings with the sith lord were secret, so according to the inquisitors and troops you hadnt done anything deserving of his attention. Little did they know you had simply done your job in the background. You served Lord Vader just like them, followed orders given to you. Rumors were rampant and everyone seemed to believe you were some kind of whore.

They hissed filthy things in the corridors as you passed, subtly pointing to you and making vulgar hand gestures before laughing, all the while staring at you like meat. Many thought you had been privileged enough to see him without his suit and won his favor serving him on your back. All of this talk because of you survived his interest for more then a few weeks.

It wasnt like that at all. As always the truth is much more boring then the tall tales whispered in the corridors. In actual fact you were an engineering apprentice. Your unsure how or why but lord vader had seen your personal schematics for new bionic prostetics, ones youd been designing for your sister who'd had a nasty accident when you were a child. He had been impressed by the design and had commissioned you to make one for him. And so you did. You made a state of the art prostetic and fitted it for him. That was all, youd measured him, made it and had been observed cloesly by the sith as you worked, he seemed weary of trusting you at first. You could understand it, you were makingnhim a new limb. but he soon realised that you would consult him everystep of the way without having to be spied upon. your task came to a very lackluster end, you were summoned each night for a week to install and configure it, making final adjustments to it untill it was perfect. And after that were simply sent on your way with a large sum of credits you didnt know what to do with.

It probably didnt help that since that week of evening visits the sith lord made a point to greet you in the halls when he saw you, sometimes a quick nod, other times stopping to ask about projects or give you new orders, usually to do with small issues onboard his ships.

These small interactions didnt go unnoticed, but before you could see the growing animosity in his closest underlings the sith lord had made a habit of checking up on you once a week. He seemed to treat his visits like a reprieve, for a an hour or so he could forget his responsibilities and investigate your latest projects, share thoughts on upgrades to the fleet or codeing on the ships mainframe. He even toyed with the idea of having you look into weaponry for him. You quickly found that he was quite advanced with engineering and coding he seemed to have an affinity for more then just the force. And honestly it made you relax around him, it was easier to forget who he was when your discussing technical advancements. Youd even go as far to say you developed a friendship with him, allbeit a very insignificant long distance one.

The issues surrounding gossip only became apparent when vader needed an impromptu sensitivity adjustment to his hand, his hydraulics had almost crushed his lightsaber in battle and that could not happen again. So he dropped into your tiny personal chop shop on the dark destroyer unannounced. And he was unimpressed to say the least declareing the space was too cramped for talent such as yours and that you needed a bigger space work. That night youd been moved in to his biggest ship; the executor. And given a captains quaters, roomy with its own wash room and new huge workshop to tinker in.

"Oh no, a lie? I wonder what he does to you when you spout lies?" The fifth brother rose with another cackle, a high pitched wheezing laugh of a weak man. He pressed forward, palms flat on the table before you, scoffing down at you.

"I dont; we dont even! Please let me go! I havent done anything!" You panicked craning your head as much as you could with your neck cramping from pressure behinde it. Tears glazing your eyes but you refused to let them fall. This was your fault, you'd come to the meeting room intent on waiting for lord vader to inform him of a new code youd been asked to develop.

Vader had asked you to investigate a possible track and trace protocol that could be useful to the control room. Youd managed to create something better. Discovering a way to automatically target hackers and implant spyware into the assailants system not only ravaging their communication but also relaying all data to the executors own systems.

In your excitement youd sought out lord vader, forgetting that the only true safe places for you on this ship were your quarters and workshop. And thats when you were unceremoniously dragged into the room and the taunting began.

"Oh, you would have us believe your not whoreing yourself out to him? Honestly its laughable. So pathetic, you think we dont notice. That we dont see his favor of you? Perhaps we can share in his delights-" the words were venom, spat at you with greed and loathing. A sinister promise below them as he began rounding the table in your direction.

"NO! NOOO! STOP LET ME GO!" You screamed trying to shake his hand away as his palm landed on your shoulder skimming your back making your skin crawl. You sobbed trying the thrash as the fifth brothers hand moved over you, following the dip in your back heading south with intent. You struggle, fighting as much as you could as the inquisitors hands roamed you, squeezing, rubbing and pinching making crude comments to the others about what a comfortable ride you must be. All the while you begged for him to stop. Threats of what would happen when vader found out were on the tip of your tongue. But fear of your own retribution should you use your lord in such a way made you bite your tongue.

You felt it before you heard anything, the atmosphere changed. The room grew cold and a sense of anticipation hung in the air as the door behind you opened. Everyone froze as the mechanical breathing of your lord cut through the room leaving no doubt to who had just waled in. It was clear no one had thought this through. You could almost hear their panicked thoughts wondering how they didn't feel him coming? But then again it was lord vader, if he didnt want to be detected he wouldnt be, it was part of his arsenal.

You heard him pause at the door, his feet planted to the floor in what could only be him taking in the sight before him.

You felt a shame youd never experienced before wash over you hearing your lords breaths break through the silence. You stayed pinned down face flaming in mortified defeat as you knew he was staring at you pitifully bent over the table. Your ass though covered by your uniform was still displayed,and in your mind a little too large to feel decent bent over like this. Your tears finally fell as your lord saw first hand how truley weak you were. It was soul crushing to think this may be the moment the sith finally realised how pathetic you were.

You bit your lip, holding your breath for a moment waiting for what ever was to come next, resigning yourself to the fate lord Vader chose. A laugh, taunting? Disappointment? Or maybe lord vader will simply ignore your situation and abandon you, let the fifth brother continue as he pleased.

"What. Is. This?" The words were distorted, almost lost in translation despite being spoken slowly between breaths. You could almost say the voice coded words sounded angry. No one made a move to answer him, probably because you all knew he wasn't asking whats going on, he was asking for an explanation. He wanted to know who and what had instigated such an attack. He wanted to see if anyone would lie. It was. Test, a challenge noone accepted.

You expected to hear a plethora of excuses, stuttering words or apologies. Hell even a ridiculous 'she attacked me' lie. But no. Instead you heard the inquisitors fearful gasps, they crouched and jerked back from their lord. Cowering. Had you not still been held down you too would have buckled under the quick, scalding burst of rage that permeated the air making it thick and painfull to breath. Or perhaps it was just your fearful anxiety that was threatening to suffocate you. You felt the darkness seeping into the room, a rageing tidal wave of fury and disgust, you dread to think what it felt like to the other force sensitve occupants.

The need and rage rolled into one as Vader finally spied what was causing the commotion. He made sure to pluck the force in the room with a vengeful malice, pressing his anger into the threads of the inquisitors own force making them each take a scuttle back in fear.

Vader tolerated many things on his fleet that he probably shouldn't. The occasional celebration, small quantities of alcohol hell he granted sick leave when people clearly faked their illness. He even overlooked some force sensitive stormtroopers, going as far as to mask them with his own force signiture when palpantine decided to visit. He would turn a blind eye to them aslong as they were loyal to him. Yes. He allowed these things to slip past the net so to speak, he never wanted to be as restrictive as the jedi.

But assaulting a young female who served him was not something he would allow.

Especially when its his favourite woman in the entire fleet. A young engineer who had enhanced his bionic hand to the point it no longer caused him pain once attatched.

He had grown fond of his little engineer. You were a marvel to behold, new concepts and technology seemed to just pour from you when you began tinkering or coding, you seemed to do the impossible. It hadnt taken him long to come to the conclusion that you were worth the time and effort. He could give you the means to make great things, you could innovate and modify his own fleet of ships and grant him an edge which they currently lacked.

But in the time he had indulged you, he had become somewhat attached, lines had been blurred. He told himself it was to manipulate you. That he needed to get close to bend you to his will without threats of violence;they would make you nervous and bring about mistakes which he did not want to deal with.

And he also wanted to understand this new odd darkness he felt. It was almost like Anakin and vader combined into this depraved poisonous yet protective longing. He wanted you. All of you, he wanted to crawl inside of your mind and occupy your every thought, to have your heart for himself and be your entire reason for living. He wanted to keep you mind, body and soul, to own you. To never allow anyone to ever see or speak to you. He needed to be your everything.

And most confusing of all? He wanted to protect you. Sheild you from any who would dare harm you. Not out of sentiment, or maker forbid love. But because you were his. You belonged to him, why would he allow anyone to tarnish what is rightfully his? He always belived his protective urges were because you were small. Defenceless and naive, much like padme. There was a quiet reverence to you he had come to appreciate and crave. He coveted your admiration, fed off of it.

He knew he was toeing the line. He was more attached to you then he would like to admit. He was bordering possessive, he didnt like you being far from him, which was the reason for moving you onto his own ship. He'd thought it would be enough to have you on the executor, walking the same halls never being too far from him, he'd made certain your clearance never allowed you to wander into the bowels of the ship. You were contained to a quadrant spanning five levels and six hundred metres squared. Not that you had realised that yet.

But having you here handlt quelled his obsessive need for you, and so he had still been keeping a close eye on you. Shadowing you, checking your movements during the day by tracing your unique access code. And when he had a spare few moments he'd hunt you down and give you random meaningless tasks just so he had a reason to give you orders inperson. Not that you seemed to notice. Or if you did, you didnt mind.

It was your ignorance to his odd behaviour that spurred him on. Excited him even, you were someone who accepted his dominance without question or complaint. Not in a fearful sense either. You didnt cower from him, your life force didnt tremble or try to resist him when his own prodded at you. There was just a calm understanding there, you accepted his might. Even when the power radiating off of him was suffocating, you still sat there obediently, loyally waiting his next command without trying to escape his presence. It was refreshing to not have to pretend, or put on hiers and graces. He could be the rough, demanding and powerfull man he was, without judgment. Which was more he could say for padme. And unlike padme you were far too meak and loyal to ever think of crossing him. You wont abandon him, you wont stab him in the back, you were a suitable alternative to padme, because you already accepted him the way he was.

It pleased him. You pleased him. And you will continue to please him as he sees fit.

Vader hovered by the door for a moment assessing the scene once more commiting it to memory. It was very rare he had to do a double take to actually belive his own eyes, but this was one of those rare occasions. And the fool whod dare touch his engineer was to shell shocked to remove his hands. It would seem he really did have to do everything around here. Oh well.

There was a beat of cruel anticipation, violence echoed silence in the room. And then you felt rather than heard a lightsaber rush across your back. You yelped out in surprise as heat engulfed your spine, uncomfortably hot like your skin was on the cusp of sun burn, yet not actually damaging you. There was a second scream accompanying yours. The fifth brother screeched an agonising blood curdling pained scream. And you felt something hit your back, the weight of the force was lifted instantly. You took a breath and jerked upright so fast you had to hold the table to stop yourself from falling over. You peered to your right only to stumble back a step as you saw what happened. And more importantly what had landed on you.

"Oh;oh god" you covered your mouth seeing the fifth brother panicking on the floor withering in pain holding up his arms to his face unable to belive what he was seeing. Your stomach turned as you saw the violent sight. Two cautorized stumps adorning each arm, a diagonal cut across each. And the hands that had tormented you were twitching on the floor loosing their colour, fading to a deathly blue.

"My lord you? His hands?" You whispered, trembling as you realised those hands had been what fell on to your back. Severed hands! Your chest tightened as your eyes roamed the sight of the whithering man before you. You vaguely heard the sound of lord vaders lightsaber retracting, but didnt react, far to focused on the sight before you.

With a slight yelp and jolt you pivoted as Vader approach you, closing the last few inches. But he did not allow you to move, one gloved hand pressing into your side keeping your back to him. You felt his fingers twitch as he held you stil.

He relished in the feel of finally touching you openly, cursing his suits thick gloves wanting to feel your supple flesh with his own skin. But he also enjoyed the intimidation his suit provided him. It was the only reason he wore it, the fear factor.

Your breath hitched as vaders hand dug into your side firmly easing you back into him. His huge frame shadowing yours, so close his cloak was falling around your own shoulders as his body skimmed yours.

"Hush little one." He ordered lightly. You peered over your shoulder flicking your gaze to him and then back to the floor holding your breath for a moment swallowing down your panic with a firm nod and released a slow breath, edging yourself away from an all out anxiety attack with practiced ease.

"Good girl. Always soo obedient, soo loyal. Youd never defy me would you?" You could hear the grin in his words, the pridful taunting thats prodded the others in a veiled threat. Vader moved his hands cross you, tucking one arm arcross your waist completely aligning your body with his. Making a show of holding you as close to him as possible.

You flushed keeping your eyes on his mask not wanting to be seen as rude. Though it was hard to maintain your gaze with your heart stuttering in your chest. You merely shook your head silently at his question. No, youd never defy him. Never, you looked up to him. So much so you felt it was him who should be emperor, after all it was vader who lead the troops, vader who fought and won the battles. It was vader who people feared and respected. He got his hands dirty and was actually fighting for something. Palpantine just seemed to make decrees and force others to do his bidding.

"Its a shame others dont follow suit. To think my own inquisitors sought to steal from me, right under my nose on my own ship" he continued speaking. Completely ignoring the other inquisitors as they still stood cowering on the far end of the table, making sure to keep their distance and avoid their lords anger. You didnt have time to fully register his words before he was speaking once more, berating his servant's whilst not giving them any of his actual attention both punishing and Insulting them.

"They believed i would allow them to sully you with no consequences. They feel that they are indispensable. Yet you have done more for me then all of them combined" you flushed absentmindedly shaking your head and tried to tuck into yourself and hide your face at the soft praise. You knew it was to rub salt into the wound, to embarrass them. These great force weilding soldiers were less usefull then a silly weak engineer that hadn't even finalised her training.

"I had thought i could trust them with you. That their so called loyalty to me would prevail over their jealousy. It seems i have over estimated them. They are not loyal, but frightened. They have no respect, just fear" vaders words were a harsh taunt, turning sinister and vicious with an air of mocking and dark sarcasm that he was known for throught out the fleet.

"And rightly so." You heard more fearful inhales from the others in the room,but you couldnt bring yourself to acknowledge them. You didnt dare disrespect your lord by disregarding his attention in favor of those who were so far below him.

"M-my lord i would have stopped, i was teasing Ugh-gagh!" Your head snapped up to the fifth brother as he stupidly opened his mouth and tried to defend his actions. You flintched as your lord moved, arm snapping out infront of you and the fith brother gurgled on his own words, choking.

"She is not yours to tease or torment" you watched in a horrified fascination as vaders hand fingers curled slightly. It looked like he was commanding a puppet, tugging invisible strings, choking the fifth brother slowly. Youd admit it was terrifying to behold, youd never seen this before and to be so close? You were conflicted. It was like watching a crash, you knew what was to come, you should look away but you couldnt. Something in you wanted to see it.

"Perhaps you should offer an apology? My little one is merciful. She is one for granting second, third and fourth chances" vader teased, enjoying dangling a bone infront of such an undeserving mutt. A thrill shot up your spine as you realised he was doing this for you baiting the dying man just to let you have a moment of retribution. Though being the cruel man he was vader made sure to tighten his grip. To cut off any sounds this squeeling little pig would try to make. And he did try to plead his case, eyes flicking to you begging for mercy.

You shivered pressing back into vader as the scene continued to unfold. Even when this man was dying you were afraid of him. And yet you weren't afraid of the sith lord commiting the act. Vader had to be provoked, you reasoned to yourself trying to fend off the uncomfortable thoughts trying to arise. After all vader had mentioned in passing about entering minds to gather information. You wonder if he could read your thoughts in real time.

"No? Well then" vaders dealthy teasing took an amused tone. He was enjoying this for a change. Especially when you released a soft half giggle under your breath at his dark sarcasm. It was irronically entertaining as your once powerful assailant made to grab his throat with two stumps. His eyes widened in true panic as he realised there was no way he could escape, he couldnt even claw at the grip tightening around his throat. You vaguely noticed that he was still firmly on the ground, which for some reason made you think it was somehow worse? It was one thing to be choked lifted from the floor, kicking your feet helplessly. But another sadistic torment to be choking on nothing whislt on the ground trying to clutch at your throat with no hands.

Vader hummed in approval at your minute glee, he always sensed a tiny dark spec on your pristine soul. You craved justice, to the point you enjoyed karma. You liked watching the odds get evened out. He even toyed with the possibility of that being why you were so loyal to him. That you looked to him as that balanceing force. The one to even the odds in the galaxy. It filled him with a delicious heat to think deep down you enjoy the way he was punishing your attacker. He felt righteous and godly as you relaxed into his hold watching the life slowly drain from someone who had made you beg and cry for mercy.

Your eyes locked onto the fifth brother as his body finally succumb to lord vader. He collapsed in a heap on the floor beside his hands. You arched back instinctively not wanting to touch the body.

"It is a pity. He was adequate in the force. Useful. But i will not ignore such an insult. Though while we are here let us make this a learning experience" his voice quivered with anticipation, not that his voice coder would give away his excitement.

You gasped, hands flying to the thick leather clad arm wrapped around you,clutching him as he moved you. Spinning around hoisting you off of the ground so he could keep you against him as he turned on the horrified inquisitors. It was when vader began speaking again you flush and willed yourself to dissappear, making yourself seem smaller against him. The others stared at you in a looks of shock, anxiety and disdain.

"This is mine. She belongs to me and me alone. And anyone who looks at her, let alone touches her without my permission will be..." vader explained making sure there was no mistake. He paused with a glance to the corpse before quipping his final amused remark.

"Decommissioned. Am i understood?" The hissed question snapped you back to reality and you began answering, only to catch yourself, covering your mouth with your hands when you realised he wanst actually talking to you. You felt rather then heard him huff a light chuckle against your back, the light humming was followed by a light squeeze against your tummy.

"Yes lord vader" the chorus of affirmation seemed to satisfy him and he placed, you back ont the floor, and took half a step back, yet still hovered closer then was needed.

"Good. If i were you I'd make sure to complete your asigned tasks before my return. Come along little one. We have much to discuss" and with that he turned on his heel and began exiting the room.

"Y-yes my lord" you squeaked quickly following him wanting to escape the inquisitors now hateful gaze.

You kept your head down, eyes fixed on the floor following the dark cape skimming the floor in front of you. You tried not to think of what had just happened. You didnt want to relive the ordeal or try to excuse any of it. You knew you'd overthink everything. Especially the way lord vader had held you so closely. The way he'd defended you so fiercely, how he'd not even just disposed of fifth brother, but mutilated him first with his lightsaber. Which he only ever ignited when truly angry or readying for battle.

Your heart jumped in your chest at that particular thought, if he was angered that meant he cared? Meant that you held some form of worth to him? Your stomach joy rushing through you. Youd admit to holding a fondness for your lord. Your admiration of of him had slowly grown into Something reminiscent of a school girl crush... only a very gaurded and respectful variation of a crush. Afterall he was your lord, a sith and the most unpredictable yet powerfull man in the galaxy. You had to be careful.

"You are unharmed?" The words spooked you as he finaly broke the silence and you looked around startled. So lost in your thoughts you hadnt paid much attention to your suroundings. Not that you needed to, everyone made way for lord vader in the halls, so you didnt need to be too aware when following him.

But had you been paying attention you might not have been so stunned when you realised you were in a huge living quarters. A sprawling expanse of black glistening tiles, black matte walls inlayed with glowing beams of light illuminating an array of practical dark furniture scattered pleasantly across the space. Frosted tinted glass acted as partition walls seperating various areas and a partiality concealed a bed room off to the far side of course the huge bed was also draped in a mix of black and maroon silk and velvet sheets.

The room was dwarfed by a window peaking out into the expanse of space, it stretched across the entire quarters in aligned sections. It reminded you of the one in the pilots control center, only this one was almost floor length. It took you a few moments to realise you may have just been lead into lord vaders private chambers.

"Y-yes my lord, thanks to you. I;" you uttered uncomfortably trying to bite down the slight panic at being brought here. Not that you thought he would kill you, it was just odd. Vader was above all unpredictable.

Glancing forward you frowned and took another slow step forward. He had disappeared, venturing deeper into the sprawling space whilst you appraised the decor. In your anxiety you began turning, trying see where vader had gone. Sensing your trepidation he called out to you, beckoning you to him.

"This way little one" you followed his voice only to pause stunned in to silence as your eyes laid on him. He had stepped away from the main open living area into a half concealed office. His back turned to you. But thats not what made you pause. No, it was when you saw his hands clasp his mask and free it from his head. A mane of wavy hair fell to his neck and he drew a deep breath as if thankfull to be free of the constricting head piece.

Your brain seemed to stutter, stalling as words died on your tongue and your mouth hand open for a moment. You never thought youd be privileged enough to see your lords true visage. It was a fantasy not even you had toyed with. Not even when you had been working on his hand, skimming the skin of his arm delicatly as you directed him to twist this way and that so you could concentrate on the connections.

He kept his back to you, slowly removing his gloves, one hand coming to his face obviously nipping the tip of a finger to remove a glove and then the second heavy leather joined its twin on the desk.

"Im pleased the inquisitors didnt cause any damage. It seems i should have kept a closer eye on you. Your far too delicate to let roam. The others think they are safe, belive me when i tell you they are not. They will pay their penance in time" you shuddered greedily lapping up his honeyed tone. Why was his soft voice more menacing then the deep voice recorder and harsh breaths?

It was unsettling, the way you could have been lulled easily from the gentle yet authoritative tone. His demand for respect was so ingrained into him you couldnt help but listen as he spoke. Though at the threat lacing his words you faltered slightly, you did feel somewhat responsible for the incident.

"It was my fault my lord. I had gone looking for you to deliver the new security codeing. You said once i finished to find you and i should have known not to approach the meeting room when the inquisitors;" you tried to argue, though you were unsure why you felt as if everything was your fault. Afterall you couldnt control the inquisitors, and they didnt exactly deserve your mercy after standing by and letting that wretch almost have his way with you for no other reason then jealousy.

"Do not try to make excuses for their deceite. You are above such foolishness" the order was harsh and swift stopping your explanation in its tracks as you tried to take the blame. The ire in his tone and way he flicked off his cloak violently made you bite your lip remaining silent. You peaked up at him hearing him cross the space.

My god. He was a devil. A frightening handsome devil. His face had softer features then you thought. Beautiful and cherub like. Yet there was a sinister undertone to him, a powerful gaze. Yellow eyes, they were haunting in a way, so unique but only enhanced the dark beauty he possesed.

He paused before you, drawing a deep breath tilting his face and concentrated on you. His yellow gaze penetrated you. You could almost feel him burrowing into you, as if he was searching your soul for something. Trying to unravel you and collect your secrets. What ever he found must have pleased him. His face split into a grin and his hands raised, one cupping either side of your face making you look at him. You didnt flinch, you didnt ever gasp as his cool bionic palm cupped your cheek. All you could do was blink up at him owlishly, unsure what he expected from you. But even through your shock you did take comfort in his happiness, feeling yourself smile back up at him.

"You are indispensable to me, you will be moved here where i can keep a close watch over you." His words were alight with a strange glee. You gasped when he tipped his own head to yours his nose skimming yours. You felt slightly uncomfortable, he seemed off? Not that you claimed to know him, because in all honesty you knew very little. He'd allowed you to uncover small details in your time spent together. But you couldnt help feel he was acting out of character. Your interaction felt foreboding, like there was something just around the corner that he was slowly leading up to. That he had a plan for you that could be something wonderful, or incredibly unsettling.

"From now on you are to be by my side at all times outside of these quarters and you workshop. I trust nothing and no one with you. This incident will not repeat itself because you strayed from me. Am i understood." The order came with its own slight chastisement. A light warning laced in the vaguely possesive words.

"Of course my lord" you didnt hesitate. He grinned, eyes darkening with a pridful victory. It was only in this moment, this final test where he truley revealed himself to you that he had realised his true victory. Your obedience to him was second nature, he'd cultivated it. Made sure his authority over you was absolute. That his dominion over you was indisputable, whether he was in his feared suit or out of it. Youd agree to anything he suggested, and youd do it of your own accord with no need for threats or violence.

He chuckled lightly befor dragging your head down and pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. The action stole your breath and before you could even wonder over the unprompted affection he had stepped back releasing you completely from his hold and turned motioning for you to take a seat in the communal living area.

"You are not disagreeing. Such a good girl. My good girl. You can see i do not have the patience for such frivolous games today" his giddy words were thrown over his shoulder whilst he rounded one of the sofas and then he sat heavily, releasing a sigh as he took the weight off of his feet. You followed him, somewhat in a daze, growing more confused by the second. But dutifully followed him and sat on the spot he patted next to him. Obeying the unspoken demand to sit as close to him as possible.

"I am pleased that the circulating gossip has not hindered your resolve or frightened you off" he continued the conversation as if it were nothing substantial. Like he hadnt just thrown you for a loop and shook you to your core with unwarranted, yet not unwelcome affecton.

"Yo-You heard those?" You stuttered trying not to falter as you held the conversation, you didnt want to disappoint him now. Especially when he was behaving so unpredictably. Youd seen his face, you were a loose end now, you knew some of his best kept secrets. It was humbling and exciting, but even in your excitement you understood the danger you could have stumbled into.

"Indeed. Though i did not confirm or deny such things, i belived if others thought you were mine it may offer you some form of extra protection when my back was turned. I was mistaken" he shifted plcing an arm around your shoulder and pulled you to him. He didnt seem to want to let you go, literally. He'd never shown this type of affection to you before today, youd never had any inclination that he was one to seek out this kind of touching. But he couldnt seem to help it, and he didnt seem to be stopping anytime soon. You flushed as a tiny voice in the back of your mind could barely contain her shy approval. You certainly didnt mind him holding you.

"My lord i; i didnt. I never told anyone that we were? Involved or or anything. I didnt mention what i was summoned for. It was no ones business. I did deny all rumours- or at least tried;" you tried to explain, fearful that he thought you wer e trying to climb rank useing his authority. You sat up, pulling away from him as you spoke wanting to make eye contact with him so he could see the truth in your eyes. But something engulfed you. A pressure pinning you to his side, firmly encouraging you to lean on his chest and tuck your head below his. You whined realising he was useing the force to position you. Your whimpers were quietened down by him hushingyou, his hand rubbing your arm soothingly. It was when you stopped fighting that the pressure left your body.

"I am well aware you had nothing to do with the gossip. Unfortunately such things happen on board all vessels. There is nothing we can do to quell them. Even if i had wanted to." He hummed, his hand rising from your shoulder to twist a lock of your hair and tuck it behind your ear.

"You look shocked." He stated with a deep chuckle, amused by your stunned silence. But continued to distract himself with your hair, knuckles grazing your neck whilst his fingers twisted the soft locks.

"I, yes, well... did you not want to stop the rumours? i dont understand" you mnaged to whisper quietly, stumbling over your words trying to make atleast one coherent sentence and not look a fool.

"Understand? what is there to understand? I am not blind. You are an attractive young woman. You have a brilliant mind and submissive personality as well as being loyal, true loyaltyis a rare find in the empire. I am not adverse to the idea of keeping you for myself." He uttered casually, treating the topic like something as mundane as the weather. It almost became a monologue, him listing his feelings methodically, speaking them aloud like he'd only just rationalised them.

"Infact i thought i made a compelling argument with the inquisitors. I do hope there is no confusion on your part" your stomach dropped , reality settling like a rock in your chest. You couldnt help feeling there was still more to this. A sinister undertone had crawled into his final words. But you couldnt discern if he ws actually threatening you, or is he was genuinely asking you if he had made himself clear.

"Well i? Yes? No? I; im sorry but i dont completely understand? When you say keep me to yourself? Do you mean as an underling?" Your resolve quivered when he threw his head back and bellowed a laugh, one hand dropping to his stomach as he did so.

"Oh sweet angel, you truly are a naive little thing arent you?" He teased lightly through his amusement shaking his head to rid himself of the remaining laugher threatening to escape him. You shrunk face glowing a bright red, unsure if he'd just complimented or insulted you. He felt your embarrassed pout and glanced down at you tipping your head up to face him smirking down at you with mischief.

"But to answer your question, under or on top. It makes no difference as long as i am your only partner, a will not share, you are mine to fuck and fill." Your jaw dropped. No. What? No he couldnt have meant? Surely not! He chuckled again sending you a devilsh look, soaking up the innocent shock and riseing flush on your face. He enjoyed your reaction to his vulgarity, he noted the way you tremble, your thighs tensing. He was tempted to brush overthem and drawmmore sweet breaths from you, let you taste what was to come. But he also knew he needed to make himself clear first. Youd probably have a heart attack if he didnt allow you time to register your new-found role.

"Speechless? Fear not there will be plenty of time for us to explore such things now that you will reside here along side me" he soothed pressing the two fingers to your chin, closing your mouth which only furthered you embarrassment. And he wasnt finished, it seemed he very much enjoyed making you squirm and continued.

"Rest assured I have no intentions on rushing you little one. Though your new uniform will be here by morning and i will make it known that there is a lady Vader on board. Should anyone be confused i will enlighten them personally" you didnt pay mind to the mention of new uniform, no. Instead the title of lady vader echoed in your head like a mantra, you were so stunned by it you almost missed the blatant threat of violence that followed.

"Wha- wait? You really mean to? You wish to be with me intimately?" Your voice cracked, making you clear your throat whislt trying to collect your thoughts that were running wild. The images of you and him tangled in the huge bed youd spied earlier were almost too much for you to bare. You tensed your legs trying not to think about having such a powerfull man ravage you, how he could possibly use his immense power to his advantage in the bedroom.

"It has been my plan yes. You captured my attention, my intrest. And have not disappointed me like so many others. slowly my feelings have morphed into affection, need. A desire for companionship. Something i have not felt for a very long time. I will not waste this opportunity, we will wed soon enough" with that he had finally revealed his intentions. You drew a deep breath trying to keep the air in your lungs and not squeak pitifully like a cornered mouse. You knew it, you were right, he did infact have a masterplan for you.

At your panicked silence vader grew defensive. His aura thickened and the room seemed to darken and cool as the seconds ticked by. He curled his fingers pinching your chin firmly drawing your attention back to him.

"I decided you will remain by my side. And i warn you now, whether you are inclined to agree with me is irrelevant. The decision was made long ago little one" his words grew icey, eyes sharpening to dreadfully observant daggers. You swallowed, nodding to him feeling a fright you hadnt felt since your first few encounters with the sith.

"I understand my lord. So i will stay here? And shadow you?" You agreed trying tp placate him and calm whatever frustration was building in him. You had no objections. Youd do as he asked gladly, you were just blindsided and surprised. If only you had the courage to admit that and voice your feelings.

Whatever darkness washed over him faded quickly and his face relaxed from an eerily calm anger, to a soft contented smile. Your quick compliance and following curiosity seemed to have quelled whatever darkness had arisen inside of him.

"Yes. We will spend a majority of our time together, either here on my fleet or my home on mustafa." You nodded slowly taking it in. The reality, this was happening. He had planned your life, planned your relationship, and the way he was so self assured in his ideas for your future showed that he had thought this through, played with the idea long enough to work around any issues tht might arise. Youd also made sure not to flinch at the mention of that terrifying planet. It was somewhere you'd never want to visit, but you doubt you'd get a choice in the matter.

"And my work? I mean will i still...after we are? wed?" You inquired wanting to pull the conversation away from mustafa. But also clarify exactly what your lord had instore for you. His face lit up, youd pleased him by insinuating your upcoming nuptials. Quietly accepting the future he had planned.

"I would never impede your personal growth. You are free to keep your workshop. And i will give you tasks to keep you occupied when i am away on business" you closed your eyes in relief. He may have sprung this on you and expect you to obey him without complaint. But atleast he wasnt going to lock you up and let you suffer bordem. Youd have some freedom.

"Thank you my lord, your words mean alot to me. I fear what would happen if i was left with nothing to do" you quickly voiced your appreciation. Still hesitant but compliant, your lord had made up his mind, and you were not going to tempt fate by arguing. You were however going to try and explain yourself. The last thing you wanted was for him to doubt your loyalty and obedience.

"A-and just? For what it is worth I... i am inclined to persue this relationship my lord. I was just shocked earlier, i meant no disrespect. I didnt mean to anger you. I am sorry if i upset you"

"Apology accepted" he hummed dragging you to lie on his chest once more. This time his arms coiling around you protectively. You melted into him. Despite having the beejeezus scared out of you moments ago you couldnt help but give into him. This had been what youd fantasised about hadnt it? Being held by your lord? Having him trust you, showing you affection and being special to him. Although you admit this was much better then your late night guilty pleasures. Not only was he holding you so sweetly, he had trusted you enough to let you see what lies beneath his mask. As ridiculous as it sounded, you couldnt help feeling that you could be happy with him, despite how intimidating he could be.

Still you couldnt help but want to make things right. To reassure him and smooth over any lingering unpleasant thoughts he may have over your silence earlier.

"It just caught me unawares. I admire you and was surprised by your words. I can admit to harbouring a crush on you. Even before today, but i never thought that..." you trailed off slowly conveying your thoughts wordlessly, trying your best to find a solace. A stability in the new situation you found yourelf in. His quick temper had shaken you, youd never had such a misstep with him before. And you didnt want to repeat it.

"Then that just makes for a happy ending doesnt it little one. Come we will eat and then rest. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day" he rose from the sofa taking your hand pulling you along side him gently.

"But in the end it will be worth it for you to watch the colour drain from my inquisitors faces when they see you take your place beside me" he lamented with a twisted grin thinking about the fun he was going to have tormenting those pathetic mutts.

You couldnt help a jolt of excitement race through you at the thought. It would be nice seeing their smug hatred become terror when your new position was anounced. Hell it would be nice to be beside lord vader, even if your future was completely dictated by him. You really would do anything for him, it was a sobering thought, but not unpleasant. How many people can say their fantasies became reality? But then again its said that when the gods truley wish to punish us they make our dreams come true. Only time will tell if this was your fairytale or your punishment.

#oh for fic sake fics #anakin x reader #star wars anakin #dark!anakin #darth vader x reader #darth vader x you #anakin x fem reader #yandere anakin skywalker #yandere anakin x you #suitless vader #darth vader imagine #anakin skywalker imagine

2K notes · View notes

intheclearblueskies · 5 months

Text

How You Met

| Masterlist |

Tanjiro Kamado:

You met in the Final Selection.

He saved you from a demon, although neither of you ever got each other's names. You survived and went on to become a Slayer with the others.

Nezuko Kamado:

You met in Asakusa.

Well, maybe not met, per se, but you accidentally bumped into the Kamado siblings and apologized. You offered to buy them both some food, but Tanjiro politely declined and they kept going.

Zenitsu Agatsuma:

You met shortly after you got your first assignments as Slayers.

You were on your way to a village when you ran into Zenitsu, who immediately noticed that you were a girl and started groveling on his knees before you, begging you to marry him.

You tried to push him off, but he kept at it until he recognized you as one of the ones from the Selection. He then started begging you to protect him until you knocked him out with the handle of your sword and fled.

Inosuke Hashibira:

You met during the battle with Kyogai.

You were one of the ones who came as backup, although you mostly kept outside the battle due to the two boys rushing in immediately and leaving you on standby (your exact words were 'This is total bullshit', but Tanjiro pleaded for you to stay back in case they needed fresh backup. You couldn't say no). You helped guard Nezuko's box when Inosuke barged out of the house, adamant to fight.

You tried your best to fend him off, but you unfortunately sustained a nasty shoulder wound from his sword and collapsed, leaving Zenitsu to guard Nezuko alone.

Giyuu Tomioka:

You met during one of his visits to a Wisteria house.

Your family dedicated themselves to helping the Pillars, although you secretly detested them for their general behavior (Sanemi cussed you out when you accidentally spilled a pail of water on him, Tengen's tastes were a bit expensive, and both Obanai and Muichiro were too cold). So far, the only nice ones were Mitsuri, the love pillar, and shinobu, the insect pillar, although Shinobu's aura kinda freaked you out.

But one day, an injured man with unruly black hair in a ponytail came to your door. The water pillar, it seemed, a taciturn man whose name was Giyuu. You were wary around him, but he proved to be kind enough that when he left the next morning, you hoped he would come around again.

Kyojuro Rengoku:

You met during a demon attack on your village.

A rogue demon was going around killing and eating. It nearly got to your family, but luckily the flame pillar Kyojuro arrived and killed it just in time.

Your family vowed to repay the favor someday. You were so impressed with his exuberant demeanor and his moves that you were determined to meet him again.

Muichiro Tokito:

You met on the way to a hot spring.

You had just finished your job for the day and were on your way to relax in a well-known spring. On the way, you accidentally bumped into the mist pillar. You apologized, and he merely kept walking without acknowledging you.

It irked you, and you vowed that if you ever met him again, you'd give him a piece of your mind.

Shinobu Kocho:

You met at the Butterfly Estate.

You were badly wounded after a fight with one of the more powerful demons, and you were rushed off to the estate. While you healed, you met your superior, the insect pillar. She was rather kind to you during your stay, and when you were healed, you gave her a box of dango from your home village as a thank-you.

Gyomei Himejima:

You met during one of his vists to a Wisteria House.

You had grown rather curious about the taciturn man, and so when he visited, you went to his room and offered to talk while you both ate. Your parents were wary of it, but he didn't mind, so you two sat and talked for hours.

You were surprised to learn that he was blind, but he intrigued you with his stories. When he left the next morning, you hoped to see him again.

Sanemi Shinazugawa:

You met during a battle with a demon.

The battle against Lower Moon Six was a little tougher than you anticipated, but right at the last moment, Sanemi came in and stole your kill, slicing the demon's head off and winning the fight.

When you complimented him on a job well done, he curtly answered, "Tch, whatever. Don't be so damn careless next time; that demon nearly cut off your arm."

He was right, of course, but his tone and rude phrasing seriously pissed you off. You sent him off with a middle finger before going off to sulk back at your residence.

Akaza:

You were walking home late at night when you realized you were being watched. You drew your katana and looked for the source, but you could only find a pair of yellow eyes watching from a rooftop. It thoroughly creeped you out, but you weren't looking for a fight, so you sped up your trek.

Douma:

Your meeting was brief, but it stuck with you.

You were the student of the retired Ice pillar just yesterday, and while you were running an errand for them they were attacked by a Kizuki and killed. You came back to their body, and for the second time, you were an orphan. Now with nowhere to go, you stumbled upon a cult and a man with a plastic smile who called himself their leader. You politely refused his offer to stay, only meaning to stay the night before finding your hometown to make a new life. You left the next morning with some new friendships, food and a little more money, but his false endearing smile burned itself into your mind. You vowed to meet him again when you got your life on track.

Kokushibo:

Your family was sort of famous for being one of the first branches of the Wisteria family, the ones responsible for sheltering slayers and helping them out. Your ancestor was one of the ones helped out by the first slayers (and one of your paternal grandmothers became a Breath of Ice user -- a long-lost art now, only cultivated by one of your aunts).

You were now a slayer yourself and were on a mission when your squad was ambushed. One of them started screaming about an 'Upper Kizuki' and begged for someone to call for a pillar before they were killed. You were hidden in a knot of a tree, watching breathlessly as this mysterious person (a tall demon with long, unruly black hair in a ponytail) gracefully struck down your squad members.

Just as you were about to leave your hiding spot, you caught his eyes -- all six of them, to be exact. The sight of his unblinking, cold yellow irises made you faint from fear.

... Hours later, you were awoken by a worried Kanroji as she and Obanai looked over the area. Most of your companions were gone, probably to be devoured, only leaving you.

Muzan Kibutsuji:

You were going about your night as a shop employee in Asakusa when a handsome-looking man in a suit and fedora walked in. He seemed gravitated to something, going straight for the back, where you kept your stuffed animals.

He picked out a small stuffed rabbit and walked up to the counter. He flashed you a charming smile and handed it over.

"How cute," you commented with a small smile of your own as you rang him up. "That'll be 1,200 yen."

He pulled out a coinpurse and picked out some coins. He handed the correct amount to you and put it back in his pocket.

You nodded, handing him back the rabbit. "Thank you, sir. Have a wonderful evening."

"Thank you," he spoke for the first time, his deep voice resonating with you and making your cheeks go pink.

Even a while after he left, you stood there stunned. Secretly, you hoped he would come back again.

Yoriichi Tsugikuni:

By your 21st birthday you had completely given up on getting married; you were still trying to find a suitable match, and your parents were still losing hope in you. Your father had hoped that someone would want to marry you, but here you were: still single and depressed. What a mood.

One day, a demon attacked your village and managed to separate you from your parents. You screamed, bracing yourself for the killing blow... but suddenly, the demon was struck down by a blade, just inches away from you. You watched in awestruck horror as it began to disintegrate, and a man with long black hair in a ponytail stood before you, his hard eyes turning softer as he beheld you.

He made sure you were alright before bringing you back to your worried parents. Your father offered anything as a thank-you, but the man simply said he didn't want anything. He left after politely declining tea, leaving you gazing pensively at his back (and trying to ignore the stunned stares your parents were giving you).

"...shit, he's hot. Hope Dad doesn't try to set me up with him, boy would that be embarrassing."

#kny scenarios #kny x reader #kny x female reader #female reader #tanjiro kamado #nezuko kamado #zenitsu agatsuma #inosuke hashibira #tomioka giyuu #kyojuro rengoku #muichiro tokito #kocho shinobu #gyomei himejima #sanemi shinazugawa #akaza #douma #kokushibo #muzan kibutsuji #yoriichi tsugikuni

76 notes · View notes

dollypopup · 3 months

Text

'Colin is knocked off the pedestal'

and we resent him for it. How dare he not be perfect? Say the perfect things? Be the perfect man? He's an idiot. He should grovel. He needs to suffer. He doesn't deserve Penelope

Colin is knocked off the pedestal

and he's a devil. he ruined her prospects. his actions have grievous harm. she should ignore him. she should ghost him. she should consider him cruel.

Colin is knocked off the pedestal

and we don't want to see him have a happy ending. she should end up with someone else. hea with Debling. fuck his brothers. he's stupid. he's blind. he's oblivious. he's an asshole. he fucked her over. he doesn't appreciate her. he's nasty. he's mean.

Colin is knocked off the pedestal

except he isn't. Colin is still on that pedestal. Colin is still expected to be perfect and when he isn't perfect, we are angry at him. we think he's The Worst. We want him humbled

We do not see that Colin was never on that pedestal. That he was never perfect. That he was never meant to be. That the perspective the audience has had of him is through Penelope's eyes, in which she thought he could do no wrong because she was so blinded by infatuation. But we were meant to know better. Colin is silly. Colin is rebellious. Colin is not listened to in his family. Colin is lost. Colin is sad.

Colin IS humbled. Colin's mother doesn't notice when he's courting someone for months. Colin's sister asks why he even came back home if he liked traveling so much. Colin's brother makes fun of him for being a virgin. Colin's letters go unanswered. Colin doesn't have close friends. Colin doesn't have a future in place. Colin is heartbroken. Colin cries alone in his room, silently, turned away from even the audience. Colin is invisible. Colin is a charming, pretty ghost in Mayfair and no one sees him

not even us

#colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #bridgerton #polin #colin thinks 'if only i can be on that pedestal someone will actually love me'#and it doesn't work #it isn't possible #colin thinks 'if i can just bring levity and ease and say the right things i'll be accepted' but he won't be #he can't always bring that #he can't always be that #and the instant- THE INSTANT he is no longer perfect colin #charming colin #smiling colin who always says the right thing #colin who is in any way difficult or complex- we think the worst of him

13 notes · View notes

casualhedonists · 4 months

Note

wtf. wtf wtf wtf. PLS tell me that she gets back to her senses and makes him grovel on his knees. bc that was too much, not only was he being such an asshole to her already but the way he treated her???? no. i def want them tog we her obvi but he needs to grovel and beg and barter and cry and all the things for her

he’s gonna be on his KNEES next chapter rest assured 🫶 like. the scales are gonna get balanced out one way or another i have PLANS hehe

but also yes he’s such a nasty piece of work, morally fucked coryo my beloved you’re so fun to write

#asks 💌#attention

7 notes · View notes

harlowhockeystick · 1 year

Note

we need a time where Princess dumps Nolan and he has to grovel hard af to get her back but nothing works and he sees her out with friends and all her friends basically berate him for being so mean to her

this happens after the fight.

they can't find to seem common ground. she is firm on living separated until engagement, he is firm on the idea that marriage isn't for him. they go back and forth on this for days, he tries to get her to come around the idea but she won't. she doesn't understand why he isn't okay with it. finally...they decide to stop the fighting and then just end the relationship. it's abrupt, it's short, it's nasty. they begin to go off the rails, but in their own way. she went off the rails by being secluded, staying inside her apartment, only going out for work and to pickup her occasional groceries. she let her hair grow out it's natural color and she even let her nails come off- something she hasn't done since her freshman year of college. nolan went off the rails by throwing himself into the vegas party scene, going out with teammates and hanging out with people he has no business being around. hanging out with people that princess never liked. each time a girl comes up to him, he pushes her away and uses the "i have a girlfriend" to get them to go away. it does the trick, but he's telling a lie, and that hurts more than anything. so it was only a matter of time before her friends drug her out of her home for the monthly girls night, and it was only a matter of time before they ran into each other. soon enough her friends spot him at the other end of the bar sipping on a beer and watching a baseball game. they've seen princess in shambles the past two weeks, and they take the chance to lay into him. and while they're going off on how he was such a bad boyfriend to her, that he didn't stick up for her, that he didn't love her enough and that he wasn't good enough for her, nolan spots her standing a few steps behind them. she looks just as horrible as he does. and that's when his heart truly breaks. he interrupts them, "i know. i will never ever deserve a woman like her, she deserves someone who will love her like she's the only woman on earth, and i will give my dying breath to make that happen if i have to." she heard every word he said, and she knows that he meant it.

#my asks #princess reader #nolan x princess #j's hc #nhl blurb #nolan patrick

36 notes · View notes

mermaidsirennikita · 5 months

Note

Top romance novel moments that live rent free in your mind.

(I take it back include derek this time I want to read that wild mf again and I need the inspo)

OH HOW THE TURN TABLES

Dreaming of You: obviously, the scene where Sara is all "oh no don't!!!" because she's breastfeeding at the end and he's like "OH YES" and purposefully drinks it because he's a real man; the scene where he thinks she's a ghost and is a blubbering mess of emotions; the "sometimes I want to punish you a little" scene; the "YOU'VE HAD ME LIKE A DRAWN DOG" scene... Like.... That shit.... is so nasty. And I. Live. For It.

The Duke's Perfect Wife by Jennifer Ashley: there's this scene where Hart fucks Eleanor when she literally has her arm in a sling and he's like "Iiiiiiii don't know if we should be--" and she's all "UM YES PUT IT IN ME" and I love her a lot; there's a scene where after they fuck for the first time in years they're on a boat and he pulls the whole yOU COULD BE WITH CHILD!!!! thing and she's trying to turn down his proposal but then she looks in his eyes and realizes he like, super wants a baby, his womb is EMPTY, and she's like *sigh* yes I will marry you; of COURSE the whole *Eleanor straddles Hart while he scowls and growls at her and she boops him* moment

When the Duke Was Wicked: Rum! On! Lips! Obviously! But I also really love the moment when Lovingdon is like "well we must get married now that we've had sex and I think it'll be great because we're really good buddies and do sex good" and Grace is like "... what" before gathering the blankets up around her being all "GET OUT" in a very dignified manner. He was flabbergasted

The Bride Goes Rogue: lol similarly Preston Clarke doing a "BUT WHAT ELSE IS THERE?" proposal and Katherine politely turning him down, to which he reacts by stumbling to her dad, who he hATES, all she *sob* won't *sob* marry *sob* me!!!!

The Duke Gets Even: the entire book but especially--"I'm going to cover you in bite marks, darling"; Nellie finding out Lockwood's Secret and clearly falling for him in that moment and him being like "pls calm the fuck down I'm only like dying basically"; the pool scene; the scene where he gets trashed to impress her cousins and they're all lmao Nellie isn't a virgin and he goes "THANK CHRIST FOR THAT"; "I'm keeping you, Eleanor" both times; the scene where he finds out nobody in law enforcement cares about him being a duke, like, at all; the scene where he manfully walks away from her and you can tell he's thisclose to bursting into tears the entire time

Mafia Madman by Mila Finelli: when Gia bites Enzo right before they have penetrative sex for the first time, like fully bites into his bicep so that it's dripping blood and his response is "stop, you'll make me come"; him returning to her after slaughtering like 20 people to save her sister, covered in bled, being all "suck my dick in the shower while I tell you about all the people I killed" and he looks down during and realizes she's touching herself and is all "THIS IS THE IDEAL WOMAN"; the scene where he keeps her chained to his bed and fingers her while his home reno employees work like six feet away; the scene where he's having a panic attack and she teaches him how to breathe through it and then they have emotional cowgirl eye contact sex and she says "make me your good girl" because... lmao.... the grovel... THE BOOK, basically

Mafia Target: this is one of the only books that has ever pulled off love at first sight so jot that part down; Alessio blowing Giulio in the club and then Giulio getting sent a pic of the guy who's been sent to murder him and realizing it's Alessio lmao; when Giulio finds Alessio chopping wood on the tiny island where they first fell in love, barehanded because he's angsty following a failed grovel, and Giulio is all "oh my god you're fucking up your murder hands you IDIOT" and takes him inside and makes him pasta

The Dragon and The Pearl by Jeannie Lin: the tattoo scene. that is all

Waking Up with the Duke: Ainsley and Jayne's parting and him telling her that he lied before and he'd rather be in her husband's place than in his own; Jayne feeling the baby kick and impulsively taking Ainsley's hand to put it on her belly and him being like "it CAN'T be mine" and freaking out because he wants the entire marriage baby thing with her now

Shadowheart: Allegreto telling Elena to take confession and Elena refusing because she can't handle the idea of going to Heaven if he's not allowed in; conversely lol, a scene where she visits him in prison and like... mouths his dick through his clothes.... and it's reeeeeally hot, especially because they have something of a femdom dynamic lol

New Camelot Trilogy: obviously, every threesome scene; the scene where Greer asks Embry to do CNC with her so she can work through some shit and also, if we are being VERY REAL about that series, CNC is absolutely Greer and Embry's Deal Together; Ash and Embry's Last First Time (and also their first first time tbh); there's this scene where Greer is all "WELCOME HOME CHEATER" because she thinks Embry cheated on them! with her cousin! and I think she like confronts him and is all does she taste sweeter than me is she prettier than me is she softer than me super meanly and he's like "NONE OF THE ABOVE" and goes down on her and it's GREAT

The (ongoing) Lyonesse Trilogy: uhhh in an extra scene there's a moment where Tristan goes "sir?" and Mark replies "Yes, puppy?" and I literally can't stop thinking about that shit. I also really love the face sitting scene in Salt Kiss. More m/m face sitting in romance novels plsthx.

Heated Rivalry: when Shane is on the phone with Ilya after Ilya's dad died and he's like "well just tell me everything that's bothering you in Russian, I don't speak it, just vent" and Ilya vents for five minutes about how he thinks he's in love with Shane and he doesn't know what to do about it and then switches to English all "ANYWAY"

The Kingmaker: the sweatshirt scene. GIRL.

Thief of Shadows: Winter taking the pins out of Isabel's hair; Winter going down on Isabel for the first time and being like "I'm sure I can figure it out somehow" lmao; Winter holding Isabel after she tells him she can't have children and just letting her cry and admitting that he would've loved to have had biological children with her but he wants her above all else oh my HEART

Duke of Midnight: TAKE MY COME FOR IT'S ALL I CAN GIVE YOU.... that whole sex scene is.... insane

Kingdom of Dreams: Royce calling Jennifer a bitch and grumpily dragging her bodily to the altar because he doesn't wanna be there any more than she does!!!

Scandal's Bride: Richard coming back to rescue Catriona from a fire only for her to yell at him after to which he basically says "WHAT. YOU CRAZY BITCH". Also, Catriona going "nobody will believe we had sex Richard" and Richard immediately sketching a pic of her ass and going "lmao well how do I know about your ASS BIRTHMARK" then because of course, he'd just been fucking her from behind like six hours prior.

#romance novel blogging #sorry this took so long lmao i went a bit CRAZY #romance novels #obviously. these are just some of them

13 notes · View notes

chimivx · 1 year

Text

HAVEN. (2) -> Lee Know x Female!Reader ( she/her pronouns )

summary: It's been three days since Hyunjin caught you with Minho. You should've realized that eventually... something was gonna give. It's crazy how friends you've come to know and love, can become strangers in matters of days.

words: 10k

warnings: INFIDELITY themes all throughout, hyunlix, alcohol consumption, mentions of smoking cigarettes, angry boyfriends ( if you can call it that ), SEXUAL CONTENT, unprotected sex ( DONT DO THAT ), smut directly under the cut, mature themes throughout every line of this mofo, If I missed anything PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

a/n: Part two is here, FINALLY! This one took forever, and it's a whirlwind... Good luck.

{ my masterlist }

Long, delicate fingers intertwined with your hair tugging you backward, pulling you flush against his bare chest while he wraps his other arm around you to grip the sides of your neck. Pressing his cheek to yours, he locks you in place while his hips smack into the round of your ass, thrusting into you insatiably.

Babbling mindlessly, he’s fucked you senseless already once, not hesitating to do it again, you didn’t have a clue as to what was spilling from your lips.

Sticking out his tongue, he dances it over your earlobe, a sensitive place you’ve grown to love having him mess with, a trick you use yourself, one you ultimately stole from him.

“Such a good slut for me,” He whispers, nipping the soft skin gently. Rolling your head backward, you lay in the dip of his shoulder comfortably, letting him aggressively, yet passionately, knock away any other thought out of your euphorically static mind.

Pursing his lips he looks down at you, eyes sharp, like he was on alert, simultaneously woven with a tinge of fear, or uncertainty.

Caressing the skin on your neck, releasing his pressure, he kisses your cheek and asks, “Who’s fucking you, baby?”

A mix between a moan and a messy jumble of his name between whimpers makes him chuckle.

“Let’s try that again,” His voice deepens, “Who’s been fucking you all morning?”

Another whine escapes you before you mumble, “Y-You.”

Humming with pride, his grip tightens around your throat, “I have a name,” He grovels just behind his teeth.

“Hyunjin,” Comes out of you fast with a sigh, “Hyunjin!”

Then, the unthinkable occurs.

From the bottom of his soulless, inconsiderate being, comes the loudest, most erotic sound you’ve ever heard him make- one that sparks your release, igniting it ablaze like you were doused in gasoline and he was holding a match.

Shaking in his arms, crying out to him, Hyunjin lays you forward, pressing you into the mattress where he snaps his hips mercilessly. Overstimulation invades your brain, the tiny sensors going off all over your body as you writhe beneath him, listening to him sing you a pretty little song.

Lost in the sounds, in the gasps, in the moans, you nearly miss him coming, pressing deep inside of you with a nasty grip on your body.

On your back, Hyunjin sucks in deep breaths, much like you, releasing a soft whine with every exhale. He stirs slightly to press a kiss to your cheek, the tiny hairs on both of your faces slick with a sweet gleam of sweat.

“So good,” Hyunjin whispers, kissing your skin one more time, “So good.”

Side-eyeing him where you laid, you breathe through your lips, waiting for him to move. There was a wave of electricity surging through your veins, and though your skin tingled with utter ecstasy, you needed him to move.

Shifting your hips, he feels you and tightens his hold, pressing another kiss to your cheek.

“No,” He whines, the sounds flowing from him now as if he’s always made them, “Keep me in, it feels so good.”

“Hyunjin, please get up,” You say quietly, and his groan that answers is all too immature, feeding into the pleasurable sounds like it was some type of joke all of a sudden.

“But your pussy’s so…”

“Hyunjin,” You cut him off, speaking up, “Get off of me.”

Following orders, he relaxes his greedy grasp and retreats off of you, taking a few steps away from the bed. Rolling onto your back you flutter your eyes shut and lift your hands to drag them across your face, Hyunjin doing the same to push his dark locks back.

Keeping your eyes covered, you hear him start to putter about the bedroom, searching for his clothes that littered the floor with yours. Listening to his footsteps accompanied by his breaths, there’s a dime sized hole in your heart that begins to ache, churning your stomach with shame. A light nauseating feeling with debilitating capabilities.

An hour and a half ago you showed up to the apartment with the intent of packing some of your things into a bag so you could stay elsewhere while you went through the process of moving. Somehow along the way, after shoving a weeks worth of belongings into the small suitcase, it was left by the door and Hyunjin had fucked you twice in the bed you used to share.

It’s been three days since he caught you and Minho in the backseat of his car going at it like a couple of horny teenagers. Three days after the argument you had at the kitchen table in the early hours of the morning, where you stupidly answered the question he pestered you with, asking you if you were in love with Minho.

The question to which you answered, yes, but then quickly added how you were still very much in love with him, with Hyunjin, hinting to yourself that you weren’t as detached as you hoped to be.

Three days at Minho’s though seemed to be taking some of the edge off, like laughing and rolling around with him over his bedsheets was healthier for you than being used and pushed headfirst into Hyunjin’s. Talk about dirty laundry, that is all this morning in this bed has brought back to you, the countless times the lanky boy wandering about the hardwood floor has let you down.

Avoiding his gaze while you packed your bag, knowing that the second you catch his eye he’ll pull you right under, you made it all the way to the door without succumbing to his bitty bursts of protest.

With a hand on the doorknob, you thought you were safe, in the clear, so you gave him a look. There may have been a couple seconds of thought, if you had to go back and relive it to figure out how you ended up on your back full of his cum, but ultimately the pleading crease in his brow was entirely too heart wrenching to ignore.

One may say that you came onto him, and since you’ve spent a secure amount of time with Minho, you cannot help but feel disgustingly guilty. Words have been shared through heated kisses with Minho, words that amplify this wall of shame to a thousandth degree.

Together, these past three days, the two of you stayed in, avoiding Haven, the drama, and your friends for the sake of things cooling off. Without seeing Hyunjin for seventy-two hours, you weren’t expecting much to change, you expected more of the same when you showed up here in Minho’s blue Mark Gonzales hoodie that he took notice of in an instant. Everything was exactly how it was supposed to be, Hyunjin wallowing knee deep in assholery, until he got you in bed, and then it was like a new and improved version of your used-to-be everyday life.

“Who have you talked to?” You ask quietly, breaking the stark silence in the room. You hear Hyunjin pause. Taking your hands away from your eyes you sit up on your elbows to find him looking toward you with only his sweatpants on. Between his fingers he holds his t-shirt, toying with the neckline as he bites onto his bottom lip.

“Nobody,” He says.

Scoffing, you roll your eyes, “Bullshit, you all gossip like teenagers.”

“Worried I’ll tell them all about this?” He smirks, pulling the white shirt over his head, his muscles flexing with the movement, “Don’t want your boyfriend to know?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” You say, keeping your eyes steady on Hyunjin as he comes back to the edge of the bed.

Knees resting against the side of the mattress, he leans over top of you, his smirk growing, and says, “Still want to tell me you don’t have a type?”

Sighing, you shake your head. Hyunjin laughs, then brushes his nose against yours.

“I missed you,” He whispers sensually, reveling in the shared air for only a moment, then pushes off the bed with his hands to collect an article of your clothing off his floor. Watching him bend over, he takes a peek at you from between his knees and chuckles. Curse the flexible bastard.

“This means nothing,” You force out of your throat, eyes glued on his smug expression as he twirls a lacy thong on one of his fingers. Waltzing back over to you, he gestures to what he’s playing with, raising a single brow.

“Sure it doesn’t,” He mutters in confidence, sliding the thin piece of underwear around your ankles to up around your hips, leaning back over your body as he does. Slipping a hand in between your thighs, he taps your clothed center and presses the tiniest kiss to your lips.

“Take my mess back home to your housewife,” His tone is so soft it’s near a whisper, one that sends a chill down your spine, “He seems to love sloppy seconds.”

Narrowing your eyes, you frown, “How did you know?” You ask at the same decibel.

“Know what?” He questions.

Swallowing hard, you whisper, “The sounds, Hyunjin. How did you know?”

For half a second his lips pull into a devious smirk, but a joyful knock at the front door swiftly pulls the attention off of you. Whipping his head toward the bedroom door that was open a crack, Hyunjin peers down to you momentarily before shouting, “It’s open!” Then leaves you where you lay bare naked, not bothering to shut the door behind him.

Frowning, you wait a moment before standing on your feet, knowing if you got up right now you’d leak everything Hyunjin gave to you into the thong he slipped around your hips. The thong that wasn’t put on purposely… Which is what you’ll keep telling yourself.

A gentle, deep voice carries down the hall and into the bedroom, one that’s followed by a boisterous laugh that on any other day would make you giggle. Felix. Another face you’d been avoiding these three peaceful days.

Hyunjin truly was a man incapable of shame, because you heard the two of them move from the door to the living room with him knowing you were naked in his bed. As if he didn’t just suck the life out of you twice, you can hear them laughing together, sharing quiet mumbles over who knows what.

Your stomach churned again over the thought of having to walk out of here with Felix as a witness. With how long the two boys have been messing around, a small part of you, the tiniest part, felt bad for Felix. The little sunspot didn’t deserve to be fucked over, though maybe doing a walk-of-shame would help him out in running far away from the energy vampire lurking around this apartment.

The feeling refuses to lessen as your thoughts shift over to Minho, having to return home to him from ‘grabbing a couple things’ from Hyunjin’s. You weren’t dating, but you were sure your situation doesn’t include sleeping with other people, let alone your ex-friends-with-benefits-turned-lover.

Heaving a sigh, you slide forward on the comforter and jump off the edge, keeping your legs pressed together as you gather your clothes from the floor. Slipping into your leggings, you toss Minho’s blue hoodie over your torso and pull the hood up, pushing your disheveled hair beneath the soft fabric.

Stepping into your shoes, you take yourself over to the bedroom door quietly, trying to keep your presence under wraps. Glancing around Hyunjin’s space, his cozy room with posters on the walls, and drawers with clothes hanging out of them, and a salt lamp he bought a couple months ago because you were going through a bought of anxiety, and a strip of pictures the two of you took in an amusement park photo booth during a trip with your friends taped to his bedpost… A lump starts to form in your throat, one that makes tears prick your eyes.

Staring at the sequence of three photos that were in black and white, you’re taken back to that day, reminded of how happy you once were.

In the first one you’re both holding up a peace sign, winking with one eye. The second photo, the two of you are pulling funny faces, Hyunjin’s eyes were wide and he crossed them, sticking out the tip of his tongue while you pursed your lips together in an angry pout. When you glance to the third, the sorrow deepens. The third photo is the worst.

You were laughing, with your eyes screwed shut, the corners crinkling, and you can remember finding Hyunjin’s silly face incredibly endearing, inciting the crazed giggles that had made your stomach hurt. Leaning toward him, Hyunjin was looking over at you, and his gaze read like immense infatuation. His light smile over your giggles showed not only how proud he felt for making you laugh, but how in love with you he was.

There were a couple cute kisses shared after the photos were taken, that moment and the entire day swallowing you in simple happiness.

When the relationship was good, it was unbeatable. Near perfection with how the two of you could be total best friends, but, when the good turned bad, it was repulsive. Like a switch flipping in mere seconds, you and Hyunjin could become each other's demise.

Not even a week after the photo strip was taken, Hyunjin slept with Jennie, thus beginning the horrors that turned you two into what you are today.

Taking a shaky deep breath, you wipe a sneaky tear from your cheek and decide to step out of the room. It was going to have to happen at some point, may as well rip off the bandaid and get it over with.

Trekking down the hall, you appear in the living room where you catch Felix’s eye in an instant. Unsuspecting, big, blue contact wearing eyes take you in, while his huge smile fades to something small. The blonde boy is sitting on the couch on his knees, facing Hyunjin with both hands latched onto one of his.

Stopping your hurried self, you focus only on Felix, your eyes just as soft as his in these short seconds you share with one another.

Checking you out, head to toe, he raises a brow slightly and says, “Hi.”

His hesitance was contagious.

After a gulp, you nod, avoid his eyes and mutter, “Hey.”

“See you later,” Hyunjin cuts in quick, giving you a smug smirk. He had an arm around the back of the couch, the one Felix wasn’t clinging onto.

“You’re coming to Haven?” Felix asks you, his pure gaze stuck where you stood. Shrugging, you clear your throat to try to ease the awkward tension.

“I don’t… I don’t know,” You mumble.

“We haven’t seen you in forever,” Felix says, twisting his body so he was facing you, dropping Hyunjin’s hand.

“It’s been… three days,” You keep your tone low, shrugging again. Felix pouts, his bottom lip pleading with you.

In the space between you, you can see that the flames of the friendship you shared with Felix had dwindled, becoming just glowing embers over the last two weeks. Though it hurt like hell to know the sweet boy was the breaking point of what you shared with Hyunjin, you cannot find it in your heart to hold him responsible.

For all you know, Hyunjin may have filled his head with lies, and poor pushover Felix doesn’t see anything wrong… With any of this.

“I’ll think about it,” You say, unable to say no to his sweet face, “Okay?”

“Okay,” Felix smiles, and the pout is quickly wiped away making you sigh. Nodding toward him once, you shove a hand in the pocket of Minho’s hoodie and head toward the front door, gripping onto the handle of the suitcase that you’d forgotten about.

“Oh,” Hyunjin speaks up, peeking over the back of the couch. Felix’s eyes follow as well, you find them peering at you when you look their way.

Hyunjin smirks again, and says slyly, “Make sure everything makes it home safely. Don’t need anything… slipping out.”

Groaning in disgust, you yank open his front door and push the suitcase over the threshold without looking back at the boy who started laughing at himself.

“Is her bag broken?” You hear Felix say as the door swings shut behind you.

Stepping into Minho’s, you find him leaning against the counters of his small kitchen just inside the back door that acted as the front. Cupping the bottom of a coffee mug with the other arm crossed, he’s still dressed in what he had slept in, a grey t-shirt and old, black shorts he used to wear to dance practices. Smiling, he’s focused on his best friend sitting at the kitchen table.

Rambling on about what Jeongin had done at Haven last night, you caught on to the topic quick, Han had his feet propped up on a chair across from his, speaking with his hands and expressive brows. The sound of you arriving catches their attention, making Han whip around with wide eyes, Minho with the gentle smile he was giving the boy a couple feet away from him.

“Hi,” Minho says, his eyes flickering down to his hoodie you donned.

Slapping a hand on the table, Han sighs dramatically, “What is that?“ He asks, staring at the suitcase you pushed inside. Turning to peek at Minho, who gives him a heavy side eye from behind the mug he now held to his lips, Han starts to smile, but represses it.

“Just some of my stuff,” You say quietly, glancing between the two of them, lingering on Minho a bit longer.

His eyes are sharp, they always are, like two tiny daggers with the inability to ever hurt you, and they’re attempting to pierce your soul at the moment. At least, it felt like they were. Minho intimidated others easily, never you, however with guilt festering in your gut it felt like his gaze knew something you did too.

“What’s wrong?” He questions.

Shrugging in response, you say, “Nothing.”

Minho frowns something silly and drops his brows, the first time his smile has broken since you walked in the door. Pushing off the counter with his backside, he slides the mug onto the table in front of Han and pads over to you with outstretched arms.

Hugging you around the shoulders, Minho pulls you into his chest and buries his face into your hair. Placing a kiss to the top of your head, he takes a deep breath- one that triggers his entire body to tense up in your arms.

“Was he there when you went?” Han asks, and Minho twists his head so he speaks into your ear. In a tone that sends your heart plummeting through the tiled floor of the kitchen, he mutters three words to your dismay.

“He was there.”

“Oh, shit,” Han mumbles. You hear his feet drop to the floor before he pushes the chair out from under him, standing up in a hurry. “See you guys later?” He asks as he brushes by the two of you. Minho pulls his chin back to look down at you.

“Yeah, I don’t know,” He says to Han, then glances at him, “I’ll call you.”

Without a goodbye, Han is out the door in an instant, leaving you vulnerable in Minho’s hold. His eyes linger on the door for a moment after it shuts, then after a breath he looks at you. Pressing his lips together, thinning them out so tight they lose their pink color, he nods.

Everything about his expression and the way he carried himself made you want to lose it. You didn’t want to hurt Minho, and after everything that had already gone down this morning, the feeling of shame mixed with the anger you felt for yourself had your eyes tearing in seconds.

“No, no,” Minho soothes, dragging a hand through your hair, “Don’t cry.”

“How can I not?” You sob with a sniffle, pressing your forehead into his chest. Cradling the back of your head, Minho pouts. “I don’t want to hurt you, I don’t know how it… I just…”

“It’s okay,” Minho whispers, “I understand.”

Picking your head up for him to see your tear stained cheeks, you glare at him and say, “You understand?” Scoffing straight after. He simply nods, twisting his lips into a small smile. Furrowing your brows, he chuckles realizing he’d need to explain himself.

“You were involved with him for a year,” He says gently, avoiding any condescension in his tone, “And it wasn’t an easy one. Hyunjin put you through hell, he messed with your head. If I was going to see an ex days after we broke up, depending on how it ended, I’d probably end up in their bed too.” Your eyes point down to his neck, the smooth, honey skin littered with small, faded love bites.

“Also,” He begins again, “We’re just… here. You and I are just coexisting in the same space as two adults who enjoy the same sport.” His words make you smile, something small.

“I’m not your boyfriend,” He says, sliding his hands around the back of your neck and up into your hair, “You’re not my girlfriend. You can do whatever the hell you want.”

“But I told you I-”

“I know,” He shushes you by giving your cheeks a squish with his palms, “I love you too, I always have.”

“And this doesn’t hurt you?” You whisper. Pondering his thoughts, Minho picks his words carefully, not wanting to cause more damage than has already been done.

Swallowing hard, he blinks a couple times and slightly shifts his head to give you an answer, one that encourages your teary eyes to go on.

“You aren’t mine,” Minho says, composing his being, though your tears threaten to wreck him, “I can’t be upset with you over this. Can I hurt? Hell yes, you slept with your ex-boyfriend after telling me you were done with him, and… I kind of trusted that you were serious.” You part your lips to speak, but Minho beats you to it.

“But, you know what?” He asks, and you tilt your head curiously, “You came back to me,” He gives you a soft smile.

“I don’t want to leave you again,” You mumble. Minho shakes his head, slipping a hand beneath your chin to hold you there.

“Then don’t,” He whispers, narrowing his eyes. Closing the gap between you, he presses a slow, gentle kiss to your lips before he asks, “Did he make you finish?” Pulling away from him with widened eyes, you make him chuckle, a hint of a devious smile appearing on his face.

“Seriously!?” You sigh, heavily. Tugging you back into him, he kisses you again and grins.

“Yeah, seriously,” He says. Dumbfounded, staring at him in shock, you stutter and give him the answer he wants. Twice. Flashing you an unreadable look, Minho licks his lips. Leaning toward you, he touches his forehead to yours, gazing down at his hoodie you wore.

“Did you enjoy yourself?” He asks at a decibel so low he quieter than a whisper. His eyes flicker back to yours, curiosity burning within them, mixed with a hint of lust.

“Minho, what-”

“Answer the question,” He grits his teeth, eyes fluttering shut for a second.

“I- I- I guess?” You stammer, “But, it was meaningless. Totally, completely, meaningless. Nothing like we have, what we have is incomparable to anything.”

“Damn right,” He smirks, giving you another kiss, this one longer than all the others. Holding you tighter, he pushes his body against yours, brushing his hips into yours. From beneath the old, black dance shorts you can feel his half hardened length pressing into your thigh.

Pulling your lips away for half a second you manage to gasp and say, “Are you getting off on this?” With a giggle before intertwining your tongue with his. You feel him smile.

“Maybe,” He mutters somewhere within the shared, flustered air, “Do you not like that?” Swiping the tip of your tongue across his bottom lip, you tilt your head back and look at him.

“I didn’t take you as the type, that’s all,” You say. Minho’s gaze eats you alive. The devil is alight in his eyes, and you already know where this is about to go.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me,” He smirks, “Did he cum inside you?” You gasp aloud, falling into a fit of embarrassed giggles, “I’m dead fucking serious,” Minho can’t help but smile with your laughter, “Two times?”

Holding a hand over his cheek, you nod, “Two times.”

“Fuck,” He groans, dipping his chin to press messy kisses to your neck, “Bet you took it all like the good girl you are,” He grumbles against your skin. Eyes falling closed, you slip into the pleasure from his sensual touch and hum, giving him some sort of an answer. As his hand around your shoulder retreats, sliding down your side to slip underneath the hem of the hoodie, his soft fingers brush against your skin, sending a chill down your spine.

Over these past three days he’s touched you this way, but with every greedy grope it feels like the first time.

Lifting his head, he kisses your lips quick, his eyes half lidded in need.

“Minho?” You mumble, feeling like your grip around him was weak. The day hasn’t even made it past noon and you were at your limit, which embarrassed you more than you cared to admit. Minho, clinging to you ravenously, clearly wanted to, and needed to fuck.

“What’s ‘a matter?” He breathes, getting his lips back to work on your neck. A whine escapes you as his teeth nip at your skin.

“I can’t… I can’t,” You whisper. Minho pulls away from you carefully. “I want to… but, I can’t… I feel too… too dirty.” Relaxing his touch, he caresses your side and nods.

“It’s okay,” He reassures you, kissing your cheek, “You want to shower?” He asks. Your eyes widen with relief, making him laugh.

“Will you come with me?” You ask with a pout. Minho takes the hand from your chin and messes with your pursed lips, smiling.

“Of course I will,” He says, “Let me help you,” He raises his eyebrows, “I’ll take care of you.”

Following Minho through the house and into the bathroom, he closes the door behind you and turns on the shower, shifting the knob to almost hit the hottest point, knowing you loved a good shower in Mordor. Kissing you once, he motions for you to pick up your arms, and as soon as they’re in the air he’s slipping his hoodie off of you.

“This is my favorite,” He says, tossing it on top of the sink.

Smiling, you kiss the tip of his nose, “I know.”

“Come on,” He gestures to your leggings as his cheeks blush, “Get ‘em off.”

His hands slide around the waistband, fingers tucking in the edges. Holding your hands over his, you hesitate, remembering what you were wearing underneath, and who put it back on you after it was thrown to the floor. Minho, with his eyes pointed down, glances up to you curiously.

“You want to do it?” He asks, taking his hands away from your body. Watching you shake your head, he slowly places them back around your hips and attempts to slide you out of the skin tight bottoms.

A quick laugh escapes him when you won’t allow him to, “My love, you can’t shower with these on, what’s the matter?”

“I’m…” You pause, clamming up under pressure. Moments like this, where you turned shy, where you were too frightened to explain yourself, takes you straight back to your childhood. You were never, ever able to express yourself the right way, there was always a fear of shame, or that the person you were speaking with would shame you themselves. Today it seemed like you went searching for that feeling, leaving the inner part of your heart cold, and empty.

Minho waits patiently with a calm gaze, letting your inner turmoil work itself out. He could only say so much to reassure you, to let you know that everything was going to be alright. The rest was up to you, to believe him, understand him and ultimately forgive yourself for being a human.

Unfortunately, to you it felt immensely deeper… You felt like Hyunjin. And that thought alone was nauseating.

“I can step out if you want me to,” Minho offers. The second the words leave his lips you’re snatching his hands, giving them a squeeze.

“No,” You say fast, making him laugh.

“Whatever it is that’s bothering you, I promise, it’s okay,” His tone is endearing, speaking to you in a way that heals a tiny part of you every single day, “Don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“How can I not,” You whisper, sharpening your eyes, “I hurt somebody I love. I turned into the person that I hate, the person that did this to me for months. Why do I deserve to be treated with care when I think he should go through, like, all seven layers of hell, or something!” Raising your voice, you start to talk with your hands, letting Minho’s go.

“All seven layers, yeah, I agree,” Minho nods, letting you go off.

“I don’t care what kind of… kink you have about this, I fucked up, and you’re being too nice to me,” Taking a step backward, you shake your head a few times and stare down at the floor.

Minho waits to see if you have anything more to say before he holds out a hand for you to take. Glancing at it, you look up at him, then focus back on his fingers. Lifting one of yours, you wrap your fingers around one of his. Laughing to himself, Minho curls the finger you grabbed, using his strength to pull you back toward him.

Almost tripping over the rug beneath the two of you, you succumb to his gesture and end up in his arms, wrapping yours around his back. Minho rocks you side to side for a bit, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“Nothing hurts me more than seeing you hurt,” He says, “It’s incomparable to anything, there’s nothing worse,” Lifting your chin, you watch him as he speaks, “For a year I endured it, that type of pain, knowing that I loved this girl so, so fucking much… And she fell for the asshole of the group,” His dark eyes scatter about the room, ending up on yours.

“I was supposed to be the one to catch you,” His voice drops, “You and I, we’ve always been connected in some way, looking out for one another through life, but, when you and… him, started to do your thing, I knew I’d lost you.”

“I’m right here,” You whisper. Minho gives you a small smile, and kisses you, smoothing a hand over your hair.

“I know,” He bobs his head, “These last few days have felt like a fever dream, I have to keep checking to make sure Han didn’t accidentally drug me again.”

“What?!” You shriek with a grin, jutting your head backward off of his chest.

“Nothing,” Minho brushes past the incident as if it were an everyday occurance, ushering you back onto his chest with his hand on the back of your head, “But, I’m glad I made you smile,” He chuckles, “Now I want you to tell me what to do, okay?”

Taking a breath you respond tentatively, “Okay.”

“Do you want me to leave-”

“No-”

“That’s been established,” Minho cuts you off, smiling, finishing his following words quickly, “I could go out in the hall while you get ready to shower, then I can come back in. Or, I can help you do it, and you can find out for yourself that nothing you could do would make me hate you.”

Nibbling your bottom lip, you take a deep breath, releasing it shakily, “I really want you to help me, but I just feel embarrassed.”

“Is that all?” Minho asks kindly, and you nod, “Thank you for telling me,” He whispers, “I hope you know that I am the last person that would think anything is TMI, especially when it comes to you. After living with you for a couple days I’ve figured some out on my own.”

Tilting back again, you gasp, “Hope you know I’ve figured some of yours out on my own, too.” Minho smiles wide, laughing devilishly with a scrunched up nose.

Squeezing you tight, he rests his forehead on yours and says, “I want them all, I want all of the TMI’s, tell me every single one.”

“Patience, young padawan,” You joke, sliding your hands up to cup his cheeks, “All in due time, all in due time.” Minho’s smile makes his cheeks squish in your hands.

“Does that mean you’re gonna stay with me?” He questions, already feeling like he knew the answer.

“‘Course it does,” You say. Minho tosses his head back with a thunderous cheer.

“Oh, yes,” He exhales, leaning in to give you a kiss.

While your lips are at work, Minho’s hands slide down around your waist, where he hooks his thumbs into your leggings and pulls them down swiftly, parting from lips momentarily. He pays no mind to whatever you thought would make him upset, and instead stands back up to lock his lips with yours once more.

Reaching behind him, you grip the neck of his t-shirt and pull it off of him, throwing it on the floor. Letting your hands slide down his chest, you take your time to show some extra love to his midriff, knowing a TMI of his, he was insecure about the scar he was given years ago. You can feel him smile against your lips.

Tucking your fingers into his shorts, you give them a tug and they pool around his ankles. Unable to help yourself when his thighs were exposed to you, your hands wander lower to give them a generous squeeze.

“Hey,” Minho mumbles between kisses, “If you don’t want to have sex, I need you to stop touching me like that, please.”

“Right,” You sigh, your hands recoiling back to his shoulders, “I’m sorry.”

“Mm,” He hums, pulling away, “Don’t apologize, we respect boundaries here, it’s nothing to be sorry for. I respect yours, you respect mine. We figure them out by communicating,” Your lips were parted in slight shock as you stared up at him, “What? Too much?”

“Uh,” You stammer, “No, not at all, I just… I’ve never been with someone that has…”

“Respected you?” He raises an eyebrow. Though it seemed his response was a jerky one, it was your truth, and it was what you were going to say. You could add that you’ve never been with a partner that wanted to communicate as much as Minho, and while it appeared that it could be a mood killer, it made everything all the more exciting and stimulating.

“Yeah,” You sigh.

Minho smirks, “Is this you implying you want to be with me?”

“Has that not been clear enough?!” You giggle. Minho’s smirk grows into a grin.

“Oh, it has,” He teases, “I just need the words, that’s all. But, you lead the way, babe.”

The air is sticky, warm, and smells of hours old, muddy shoe stepped in beer. When the heavy door was pushed open and you were met with the warm, polluted glow of the neon lights, it smacked you directly in the face. After not making an appearance here for a few nights you weren’t so used to the stench you all were conditioned to ignore.

Haven was packed wall to wall tonight, a sight that riddled your body with nerves, because if the bar was buzzing that meant every single one of your friends was there to enjoy it.

Nearly impossible to keep a secret from any of the eight of them, you were wondering if anything had been spoken of about your whereabouts this morning. You hoped for Minho’s sake, and your own, that Hyunjin had kept his mouth shut. There wasn’t a need to live through it again, you and Minho had it under control, it was talked about. Then again, when it came down to it, Minho was the only one you needed to be okay with. Hyunjin was of no concern to you, the morning had meant nothing, and you intend to stick by that.

Lacing your fingers around Minho’s, he pulls you in front of him, guiding you through the crowd of plastered young adults instead of dragging you along behind him. He maneuvers one of your shoulders and your hand, pointing you in the direction of the corner where the nine of you typically holed up.

“Wait,” You stop abruptly, Minho bumping into your back. He glances around you, you’ve stopped directly on the dance floor.

“What?” He asks, nuzzling his nose into your hair.

“What if he’s here?” You say with remorse, taking into consideration this healthy communicator thing with Minho. You can feel him shrug his shoulders, dragging a thumb over the back of your hand.

“He’s allowed to be here, this is where they all collect,” He answers honestly, and your heart sinks a bit, “It doesn’t mean he’s allowed to harass you, though. I won’t let that happen. You’re going to stay as far away from him as possible.” The corners of your lips prick up when you hear the subtle jealousy in his tone. Not that you wanted Minho to be jealous, but hearing him shift into an overprotective energy was invigorating.

“He and Felix are probably off catching a public indecency charge somewhere anyway,” Giving your hand a squeeze, Minho pushes your hips with his own in hopes that you’d continue on to find your friends, “Han and Chan miss you, keep it moving.”

Apart from the dread of running into a couple you don’t want to see, you were happy you were here tonight. Haven was always a place of comfort to you, before the downfall of the friend group, and hearing that Han and Chan were in attendance made you smile.

“Seungmin and Jeongin?” You ask, tilting your head back to catch a look at Minho. He nods happily. “Thank god,” You groan, “I haven’t seen them in weeks.”

It’s been ages since all of you were under the same roof at the same time in the same night. The variety shuffles every night you’re here, you’re almost never with the same group twice. No wonder information seemed to travel fast.

“SHUT-the-FUCK-UP!” Changbin’s voice carries throughout the bar once he spots you and Minho elbowing your way through the crowd.

You appear in the clearing first with a smile, five faces alight with joy smiling back at you. Tugging on Minho’s hand, he pops up beside you, and three of those five smiles turn to shock.

“You weren’t kidding?” Seungmin asks Han with wide eyes. The boy you found lounging at the kitchen table this morning sat back in his chair, opening his hands in the air, gesturing toward you and Minho, who had pressed himself against your back.

“Boys, I wasn’t kidding,” Han grins.

Changbin rests his elbows on the table in front of him, his biceps tightening in the sleeves of his t-shirt. His naturally curly black hair grew out above his eyebrows, giving him a badass look about him.

Shaking his head, he laughs, “Never thought I’d see the fucking day, Minho.”

“Shut up,” The boy behind you snickers.

Chan takes a swig of his drink, tapping Changbin on the shoulder.

“He’s right,” The eldest agrees once the beer is swallowed, “For months we’ve had to put up with the incessant pining…”

“And whining!” Changbin adds jauntily.

As the boys continue on, you find yourself giggling along with them while Minho beckons them to stop wearing a smile.

“How much longer is she going to put up with him?!” Changbin squeezes his eyes shut, adding drama to the scene he’s creating. Han can’t help but laugh as well, adding in a few of his own ad libs.

“She wants to visit Europe, I’d take her to Europe!”

Your smile turns into curiosity.

Chan shakes his head and reaches across the table toward Han, “Wait, wait… How about the time this past summer when he didn’t want to go on any of those rides with us? What’d Min call him?”

Jeongin slaps the table and cackles, “A fucking wimp-ass cry baby.”

Dropping your jaw you glance over your shoulder. Minho, his lips thinned so tight the color was non-existent, nodded and glared at the wall.

“You really don’t like him,” You say quietly. He flickers his dark eyes to you.

“Never have,” He whispers.

The chatter from the boys went on in the background, you and Minho sharing a moment, a knowing moment as you gazed at one another.

“You’d take me to Europe?” You ask, smizing. The corner of his lips perk up.

“In a heartbeat,” He sighs.

At the table Seungmin signals for your attention, Minho’s ears pricking up as well. Flashing you a small, braceless smile, Seungmin narrows his eyes.

“I never got the full story, what happened a few nights ago?” He asks suspiciously, toying with the condensation droplets on his glass.

A gentle, unanimous groan sounds around the table, though Jeongin listens attentively, hoping to catch the details he was missing as well.

Getting a good look at them all, their curious eyes, and Han’s worried brows, you spin around in Minho’s grasp and try to push on his chest to maneuver him away.

“I can’t… I can’t,” You whisper. The boys whisper behind you, Minho glancing up to them a few times. He rubs your back and nods his head, pressing a quick kiss to your temple.

Gesturing to Han, he signals his best friend to tell them the story, then ushers you away toward the bar, “We’re gonna grab some drinks,” He says, entrusting Han to tell the story right without sharing too much.

At the bar Minho places you upon an old stool, the metal creaking beneath the wood as you make yourself comfortable. Minho stands off to the left of you, placing a hand on the bar and the other around your waist.

“What are you drinking?” He asks you, coming close to your ear, laying his cheek over top of your hair.

Checking out the various bottles of half full options of liquor, you decide on a simple vodka soda, hoping to only have one and stay alert for the rest of the evening. All you needed was one glass to calm the anxiety, the Hyunjin showing up out of nowhere anxiety.

Acquiring two glasses, Minho tosses the bartender a twenty and slides your drink in front of you.

Lifting his as if to salute, he takes a swig and places it back on the bar with a knock. Following suit, you take a huge gulp, shake away the sting in your throat and let out a dramatic, “Ah!”

“Feels a little strange to be here,” Minho begins, leaning on the bar with his elbow, scouring his surroundings.

“Does it?” You ask. He nods.

“I dunno, I’ve been feeling like I’ve grown out of this, if that makes any sense.”

Taking another lengthy sip from your drink, your eyes go wide as you agree with him, “I know what you mean.”

“Right?” Minho smirks happily at you, “We’re only here right now because…”

“Han,” You giggle.

Sighing dramatically, blowing a raspberry from his lips, Minho mumbles, “Han.”

“How about,” You lean closer to him, nearly touching noses, “We stay for, like, another hour, catch up with the guys, then sneak away,” Sliding one of your hands down his side, you caress his thigh and give it a gentle squeeze, “Pick back up where we left off?”

Painting a lazy smile onto his face, hanging onto the end of every word, Minho nods, then closes the gap to give you a kiss.

“Only if you’re feeling better,” His voice is hushed between the shared air. Running your fingers along the seam of his jeans you smile. Healthy communication.

“I am feeling better,” You whisper, planting a heavy kiss on his lips.

You want to get lost, in Minho that is, but a happy-go-lucky voice calls out your name from a few feet behind you that sends your heart plummeting through the sticky concrete floor.

Whipping your head around, bumping Minho’s nose with your ear, you find Felix coming toward you. Alone. The blonde scurries to your side quickly, leaning against both of his arms on the edge of the bar.

Facing forward, you look over at the smiley boy and take a deep breath. He seems excited to see you, and not the least bit surprised.

“Hey guys,” He releases a breath and gives Minho a wave, “So, who was it?” He nudges you with his elbow, “Was it me? I got you to come right?”

“Excuse me?” Minho raises a brow.

Placing a hand to his shoulder, you slightly shake your head, still overcome by shock. “I think, I mean… You know the guys- I, uh… Yeah, it was you.”

Felix tosses his head backward with a cackle, “Knew it. I missed this, yanno, everyone here together. We used to have so much fun.”

“Till you fucked it up,” Minho mutters, glaring out toward the crowded dance floor. Kicking his shin with your ankle, you take another deep breath and try to smile.

If Felix was here, his master wasn’t too far behind.

“Uh, yeah, everyones here, right?” You ask, wondering if he’d give you details, which you’d turn into pointers on how to avoid Hyunjin.

Smiling proud, Felix nods, gesturing to the group over his shoulder, “They’re all over there.”

“I’m a little confused,” Minho says, sending a chilling glare across the bar to Felix who’s smile decreases drastically, “Why are you over here if everyone else is over there?” Standing straight up Felix gulps, darting his eyes between the two of you. He shrugs twice, then places a hand on his hip.

“I said this morning that I hoped she was coming here tonight, because, uh, we haven’t seen each other in a few days,” He says.

Minho rolls his eyes and smirks, “You haven’t seen her in days ‘cause you’ve been attached to Hyunjin’s hip.” He glances at you momentarily. You didn’t tell him you had run into Felix.

The blonde boy stammers a few times before saying, “Right,” He laughs awkwardly looking over at you, “It’s great you’re here, sorry to bother you.” He attempts to smile, but the pressure of Minho’s glare sends him scurrying away to the others.

Still turned to the right, you watch Felix hurry off, afraid to face Minho. It wasn’t that you were scared he was going to be angry you had seen Felix, it was the fact that someone else had seen you at Hyunjins. Someone else other than the three of you knew what had happened. And with everyone under one roof tonight, it was a matter of time before it spread like wildfire.

“Didn’t expect that one to be thrown into this mix,” Minho sighs, wrapping his hand around his glass. The arm around your back had slid up to your shoulders.

Twisting your body around on the stool, you face him completely and shrug sheepishly, “Me either, Minho,” You whisper, eyebrows turning inward, “I wasn’t keeping that a secret, I hope you know that.”

Shaking his head he gives you a reassuring smile, “I trust you, I know. He’s just… loose lipped that’s all.”

“And Han’s not?” You question, raising an eyebrow.

“Not with me he isn’t,” Minho scoffs, tilting his head side to side teasingly.

“Let’s hope so,” You say, softening your gaze. Minho leans forward to kiss your cheek, resting there for a few seconds after his lips leave your skin. Breathing him in, you’re succumbed to peace for all of eight seconds.

Nobody wanted you to have a good night.

“Hey, Min!”

Cue heart falling deeper seven more stories, and stomach spiraling down beside it. Electricity shoots through your veins. The bad kind. Every muscle in your body tenses, just like Minho’s hand on your shoulder.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Minho spats.

“Don’t be stupid,” You manage to whisper, feeling frozen.

Minho scoffs once again, “Too late.”

Pulling himself away, Minho stands in front of you, facing the menace on his way over to the bar. Dressed in dark colors Hyunjin has his hands shoved in his pockets, shoulders rolled and chin cocked back. His long black hair is pulled back with an elastic, his soft, delicate features on full display beneath the strand of hair that falls over his forehead.

“You know damn well you need to walk away,” Minho barks, clenching his jaw. Hyunjin pauses, six feet away from you, grinning.

“No, I can’t do that,” He sings, rocking on his feet, “You disrespected somebody I love.”

Minho bares his teeth, “I could say the same.”

Laughing, like, actually laughing, Hyunjin takes a look at you peeking at him around Minho’s back, “That was no disrespect, she asked for that.”

“Liar!” You shout, jumping onto your feet. A fire is ignited in your chest. Hyunjin pouts.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” He says solemnly sarcastically, sending a look to Minho, “Did you like my gift I left for you?”

You thought Minho was going to blow his top. Taking a step forward with his fists clenched, you grab onto his arm to keep him back. Hyunjin laughs again.

The walls of the bar feel like they’re closing in around you, like there’s no way to escape, and Hyunjin will stand here taunting you forever. You knew he was lying, even Minho knew he was lying, but that didn’t erase his presence. His manipulative, degrading, charismatic presence that was detrimental to everybody around him.

Hyunjin glances at your hands gripping Minho’s muscle, then looks to your eyes, turning his chin downward, “You got to be careful who you trust, baby,” The name sends a bullet through your heart, “You wonder why I knew what I knew?” Hyunjin shifts his glare to Minho.

Taking a breath, you furrow your brows and shake your head vicariously, “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Yeah, what the hell are you talking about?” Minho repeats, nearly shaking in your grasp. You see him take a quick breath, swallowing hard.

“You’re kidding,” Hyunjin huffs, smiling with pleasure, “People talk, these people talk, the people over there?” He puts heavy emphasis at the end of his sentence like Minho had done with Felix, “You think because we’re done it means I’m not going to be friends with them anymore?”

“Walk away,” Minho warns.

“You think because you fucked up our relationship, it means I’m going to be the one to walk away?” Hyunjin was speaking directly to you, inching closer and closer, “You make me out to be a villain to all of our friends, do you know what you’ve done to me?”

All you can do is shake your head. Hyunjins eyes bore into yours with an anger you’ve never seen him express, it was terrifying.

“Hyunjin, leave,” Minho says louder, alarm in his tone.

“Shut up, Min,” Hyunjin whips his head, piercing him with his words, “For once in your life, shut up. If you knew how to do that I wouldn’t be so smart, would I?” Hyunjins smiles sadistically, shooting you a look.

“What?” You whisper, your body going cold.

“Don’t listen to him, he’s trying to get in your head,” Minho says to you, glancing at you quickly. His heart is inflicted with pain when he sees the look on your face.

“Not hers,” Hyunjin corrects, taking two steps closer, a foot away from Minho, “Yours.”

“I really, really need you to walk away,” Minho speaks through his teeth.

Hyunjin chuckles, “Why?” He narrows his eyes, “Afraid she’ll realize she misses the good dick and will come running back?” Pausing, Hyunjin purposely looks down at you, “Oh, wait… She already did.”

Minho isn’t quite sure how it happened, and neither are you. Within seconds the two boys are on the dance floor with Hyunjin literally on the floor. A crowd has formed around them, many of the bystanders egging them on, chanting nonsense at them.

Standing over him, seeing complete red, Minho’s fist was pulled in at his side, his other hand rubbing his knuckles, soothing the sting. Hyunjin, on his back, stared at the older boy in shock with a split lip, blood starting to trickle down his chin. He doesn’t stay down for long, and once he’s back on his feet he lunges for Minho who blocks both of his shots.

Tearing your eyes away from the fight, you search the crowd for any sign of your friends, praying that one of them would jump in to break the two apart. You didn’t want to be the one to do it, you weren’t sure if you could even try.

Out of the six that remained, Felix was the first one to show up, pushing people aside with a purpose.

“Hyunjin!” He shouts, rounding the tussle, “Stop! What the hell!”

You shake your head, the only thing you seem to be able to do today. He wasn’t going to be able to get through to him like that, Hyunjin could become blind with rage, and though Minho was all the more stronger than him, you’d lie if you said you weren’t nervous.

“Chan,” You whisper, and your feet send you rushing around the crowd, “Chan!” You shout, catching the eldest’s attention as he caught on to the incident at hand.

“What the fuck is going on?” His brows are furrowed beyond belief, raising himself to his tiptoes to look over the rows of heads around his friends. Grabbing onto one of his biceps you sigh heavily, your eyes telling him everything he needed to know. “Fuck,” He groans, sharing a look with you, “I really didn’t want this to happen.”

It was ironic really, the fight taking place in the building that brought you all together.

Funny that it would be the spot to tear you all apart.

By the time Chan was over at Minho’s side Hyunjin had him in a headlock, but it didn’t hold him for too long, Minho spun out of it and elbowed Hyunjin in the side. The sound that left him worried you. He was a jerk, but you didn’t like to see him hurt.

Felix was popping in and out of the circle, trying his best to latch onto Hyunjin in some way that would make him stop, or pull him away. He was still shouting at the two, the frustration excruciatingly clear in his voice.

Seeing that Felix had inserted himself in, Chan followed along, swinging an arm around Minho’s chest, pressing his chest to his back. “Get out of this, bro,” The Aussie says, “This isn’t you, this is Hyunjin though. Let it go.”

“Can’t let it go, he’s a fucking douchebag!” Minho shouts, half at Hyunjin who shoots him a maniacal grin, just asking for more. Pushing Chan away with his hips at full force, even Chan is shocked by Minho’s power.

For another few minutes the boys go at it, Chan and Felix both attempting to put an end to the mess. Seungmin and Changbin put themselves up front as well, hoping some verbal encouragement would get them to calm down.

It wasn’t until Hyunjin knocked Minho clear across the jaw that you had to look away, curling your hands into fists over your eyes. Sucking in a deep breath, you walk backwards unsure of where you were headed.

You back up straight into somebody’s arms, arms that wrap around your shoulders and hold you gently. Turning back you’re greeted with a warm smile from Han. The immediate safety you feel is overwhelming, making tears prick at your eyes. Spinning around all the way, you loop your arms under his and bury your face into his chest.

“I know,” Han sighs, rubbing your back between your shoulder blades, “Surprised this didn’t happen sooner.”

Tilting your head back you roll your eyes and scoff, “Honestly? Thought this was what was going to happen a few days ago.”

The night Hyunjin spotted you and Minho tumbling out of his car all loose and wiggly like drunks, you expected it to go down. You thought for sure that Hyunjin was going to lose his shit on Minho, and once his mouth got going, vice versa. Instead, Hyunjin walked away. He didn’t drive you back home, but he walked away, leaving you alone until you arrived home that early morning.

From over your head Han watches Chan finally break Minho away from Hyunjin. Felix latches onto his boytoy quickly, pulling him backward and out of sight for the time being. Chan stumbles backward, locking Minho’s arms behind his back to keep him from charging forward again.

Han looks down at you and smiles, saying, “Let’s go outside,” knowing Chan was headed there with Minho next.

The air outside Haven felt twenty degrees cooler, the night air both refreshing and a shock. Han let you lead the way out, keeping watch for Hyunjin or Felix. It was a typical Minho thing to do, making you curious if he had commissioned Han as his second.

There’s not many people outside aside from the few smokers who accumulated along the walls. Most of the crowd had probably been drawn inside by the commotion, not many fights broke out at Haven.

Wandering close to the sidewalk, you fold your arms over your chest, smoothing your hands over the fabric of your shirt. Tilting your head backward, you look up at the night sky and take a long, deep breath, releasing it with a groan.

Han stayed close by, but gave you your space, crossing his own arms, keeping an eye on you as you tried to process the evening.

“You know,” You say, side eyeing him, “I really wish we didn’t come here.”

Han takes a breath and nods, “Understood,” He says, and continues on before you can look away, “But, if you didn’t, I think that tension would’ve never been taken care of.”

“Tension?” You question, and Han nods again, “The tension? Between Minho and Hyunjin?”

“They had to get it out, they had to confront it,” He shrugs, “Besides, Min’s hated that guy for ages, he’s been dying to knock out a tooth or two.”

Thinning your lips you send a glare his way while remembering what Hyunjin had said prior to the brawl.

“I don’t think there would be all this tension if you guys didn’t run your mouths like teenagers,” You grill, sharpening your eyes, “I’m starting to feel like I can’t trust any of you. There are things you don’t need to share, things other people don’t need to know.”

Han smirks, huffing a laugh, “We’re always going to talk, I’m sorry.”

Dropping your hands to your side, you turn away in defeat.

“But, if this has to do with Hyunjin, which I’m pretty sure it does… Whatever he did, whatever he said? It was definitely to use you,” Han opts for a softer tone, “If he found shit out from whoever, probably Changbin because he’s always with Felix, it was just so he could use you. He could’ve chosen not to do it, and I think you know that.”

Taking in what he’s said, you nod, folding your hands together behind your back. Focusing down at the grass growing in between the cracks in the concrete, you wander around in a small circle, marinating in the quiet for a moment.

Glancing up at Han, you utter a, “Sorry,” and kick a stone with your sneaker.

“You’re fine,” He smiles, “I get it.”

You scoff, “Seems everyone does except for me.”

Han seems ready to offer you some more support, but the door to Haven swings open with a vengeance, slamming into the wall with the loudest crash. Both of you stand straight up, turning toward it attentively.

With a hand clamped over his mouth, Minho has his eyes pointed down, hurrying out of the bar with Chan on his tail. They’re the only two to come outside.

“You’re leaving,” Chan says, seeming to finish up a conversation they had been having inside. Coming to a stop, Minho pulls his hand away, wiping his chin and shaking it at the ground. His perfect, porcelain skin is stained red.

“No shit I’m leaving,” He growls, examining his hands that were definitely going to be bruised tomorrow.

Chan would’ve said more if he didn’t spot you waiting on the sidewalk near Han. He presses his lips together in a simple smile of apology, then backs away to head back inside Haven. Minho hadn’t noticed you yet. Dropping his hands, his eyes go wide as he turns around to speak to his friend who had left him.

“No, wait, I have to get-”

“Me?” You offer, cutting him clean off.

Whipping himself around with eyes full of utmost sorrow, he clenches his jaw and exhales heavily through his nose.

The air is quiet for a little bit, letting you examine his appearance in peace. His hair was tousled, and his mouth was fucked. The t-shirt he put on for the evening was disheveled, while the strap of his boxers stuck out of the waist of his jeans on the side of his torso. His knuckles were red, cut up, and clearly painful while you watched his expression tense as he stretched his fingers out.

“Don’t do that,” You whisper, “Something might be broken.” He attempts to laugh, but it leaves him in the form of a breath.

“I was a dancer, nothing’s broken,” He says just as quiet. Exchanging a look with Han, he bobs his head and glances to the ground, “Thanks,” He mumbles, Han’s cue to leave.

Heading toward the door, Han nudges Minho’s shoulder and says, “I’m going to pretend to be mad at you for her sake, but, if I’m being honest, I’m happy for you, and hope you kicked his ass.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Minho shakes his head, breaking into the smallest smile. Han turns to give you a wave, motions for you to call him after gesturing to his best friend, then leaves you and Minho alone.

“I said don't do anything stupid,” You say once the door to the bar is shut. Minho flickers his eyes to you, listening. “He deserves an ass kicking, yes, but from anybody but you, Minho.”

“I’m sorry,” He whispers. Stepping closer to him, you frown.

“You don’t have to be sorry, I get why you did it,” Your lips turn up into a smirk, “And as hot as it is, I don’t think I like the way jealousy looks on you.” Popping his brows, Minho wipes his chin and chuckles, checking to see how much he was still bleeding.

“Talk shit, get hit,” He says, shrugging.

“Were you? Talking shit?”

A sneaky grin appears on his face, “‘Bout Felix, yeah.”

“Min,” You exhale, walking over to him. His wounds were even harder to look at up close. “What about what you said? Us outgrowing this?” Lifting a hand, you smooth your thumb over his cheek and slightly pout your bottom lip. “My beautiful boy.”

Minho dips his head forward, laying his forehead on yours, fluttering his eyes shut. Running your fingers through his hair, you cup beneath his jaw and gently place a kiss to the tip of his nose. A smile escapes him.

“You still want to be my boyfriend after all of this?” You whisper.

Minho’s eyes shoot open, “Yes,” He says swiftly. Laughing together, you kiss his cheek and slide your arms around his back.

“Come on,” You say, “Let’s go home, clean you up, and… let me take care of you.”

Minho smiles, “Lead the way, babe.”

thank you for reading, I hope you’ve enjoyed this piece!

feedback is always greatly appreciated & helps artists immensely. we also all love messages & the audience’s input, opinions, and ideas.

leave me some here! <3

53 notes · View notes