#math and econ major I think

[itsbeeble]

Doll

Summary: You and Hyunjae had never really gotten along. But, since he was your brother’s best friend, you couldn’t exactly avoid him your whole life. Especially now that Sangyeon has enlisted Hyunjae to help you study for your classes.

Genre: Fluff, Smut, e2l (kinda)

Pairing: brother’s best friend!Lee Hyunjae x afab!reader

WC: ~6.5k

WARNINGS UNDER CUT

Warnings: Uhhh public sex (car sex), slight age gap (Hyunjae is two years older than reader), oral (m and fem receiving), pet names, switch!Hyunjae, switch!reader, Haknyeon might be scarred for life, swearing, mentions of chemistry, they make out in a library, face-fucking kinda, threats, reader almost kicks the bucket, Hyunjae jumps out a window, Sangyeon is NOT happy, idrk there’s a lot happening MDNI!!!

A/N: Yeah this is uh... yeah

~

“This is so easy, how are you not understanding?” Hyunjae is hunched over beside you, scowling at the seemingly infinite number of red marks he’d made on your worksheet. You scoff at him.

“Sorry to burst your little bubble, Lee Jaehyun, but maybe you should consider the fact that Chemistry doesn’t come easy for everyone.” Maybe take that stick out of your ass and you’d see that.

Lee Jaehyun, or as most people like to call him, Hyunjae was a straight A student. He was nearly perfect in everything. Perfect grades, perfect voice, perfect face, perfect body. He was perfect when it came to the sports he played, he had the perfect family and home. The only horrid thing about him was his attitude. 

He was cruel. To you, at least. Maybe just to you, his best friend’s little sister. Maybe he just didn’t like you because you always seemed to be around, always trying to one-up him in everything related to school. Trying to be better than him at math, at english, at extracurriculars. You joined the debate team in high school just to spite him. And he’d be damned if he ever said he felt threatened by you. 

If you were being honest, you really didn’t hate him. You liked him, even though he clearly didn’t care for you. You looked up to him, similar to how you looked up to your brother, but Hyunjae was different. He wasn’t just your brother’s best friend. At some point you started going out of your way to try to impress him, even if it never ended well for you. You wanted to spend more time with him, get to know him more. 

“I would think that you’d be decent at this,” he sneers at you, “given how you seem to be so good at everything else.” You bite down on your tongue and turn back to the worksheet. The mistakes you’d made were so silly, so you understand why he’d be confused that you’re getting them wrong. Simple miscalculations when balancing equations, simple miscalculations for enthalpy. All of them were simple, and yet somehow you consistently got them wrong. “Your brother wouldn’t be making these mistakes. I thought you idolized him.” 

“I’m not Sangyeon,” you snap. “Plus, why would he be taking a chemistry class as an Econ major? He doesn’t need this shit.”

“Gen eds, doll.” Hyunjae smirks at you. “We all had to do them at some point.” 

Your tongue was starting to hurt from how hard you were biting on it to avoid yelling at him. You’d forgotten that Sangyeon and Hyunjae were already in their third year of college while you were barely starting your second. 

“Don’t call me doll,” you slide your chair forward and lower your head. “Give me another worksheet.” Hyunjae shakes his head. “Dude, give me a worksheet. Let me try again.”

“I’m not giving you another worksheet,” he says as he begins to pack up his things. “You clearly aren’t understanding anything I’m teaching you, so why should I keep helping?” You rise from your chair at the same time as he does, your eyes going wide. 

“There’s no way you’re giving up because I get mixed up sometimes.” He looks down at you, almost annoyed that you’re still talking to him. “Lee Jaehyun, you cannot be serious.”

“I’m dead serious, doll. I don’t know why your brother asked me to help you when it’s clear there’s nothing I can do for you.” He turns to walk away, and your hand latches onto his wrist, attempting (and failing) to pull him back. He’s taller than you and definitely a lot stronger. You barely even get him to wobble on his feet, and he hardly stops walking toward the exit of the library. Now, you’re just being dragged along with him. 

“Why do you hate me so much?” You jog to stand in front of him, walking backwards (in hindsight, you should’ve known that was a bad idea). “Like, I’ve never done anything wrong to you but you just fucking hate me for no reason. Why?” He’s looking down at you while he walks, jaw tense and eyes narrowed into a glare. 

“You’re stuck up and think you’re better than everyone.” 

“Yeah, but so do you!” You argue. 

“You’re more annoying about it though. Like everyone has to know that you think you’re better than them.” He spits out, and the two of you stop walking, standing outside of the library. The cold air of November bites into your skin, slipping through the gaps of your knit sweater. “You just have to brag about every achievement you get, about every goal you make in soccer, and every award you get from school. You think you’re just some fucking princess that everyone needs to bow down to.” 

“Again, you’re the same way!” You snap. You’re walking backwards again, hardly paying attention to where you’re going with how focused you are on Hyunjae. “You’re constantly shooting me down, when all I’ve ever done is look up to you! All I’ve ever done is try to impress you, but you just have to make me feel bad about myself huh?” 

Hyunjae’s eyes widen a fraction, his lips parting as he listens to you talk. He’s not walking any longer, but you are. You’re backing toward the stairs leading to the parking lot and he reaches forward to stop you.

“Doll,” he tries to get your attention but you’re on a tangent now.

“Maybe I went too far sometimes, but it’s only because you’re my brother’s best friend and I wanted you to notice me!” 

“Doll,” Hyunjae tries again and takes a step forward. You’re getting closer to the first step, just inches from backing off the edge. 

“But you’re right. Little old Lee Y/N can’t possibly be worth helping, she’s too dumb for you isn’t she? She isn’t enough for you to not—” 

“Y/N!” Hyunjae lurches forward when your foot slips from under you. For a moment you flail in the air, arms waving while you attempt to get your balance. Your brother’s best friend grabs one of your arms, yanking you toward him and pressing you tightly to his chest. Your body spun, and you found yourself pressed against the railing, your face squished against the tall man who had his arms wrapped fully around you.

You can feel your heart pounding, and you can feel his own, It’s rapid against your cheek, slamming against his ribs. He’s warm. His body is warm, and your hands tighten around his jacket. Call it desperation, but you know this is the only time Hyunjae would ever touch you and you wanted to make the most of it while it lasted.

“Are you dumb?” Hyunjae pulls you away from you, holding you an arms-length away while he scans you over. “Why the fuck would you walk backward near a staircase?” He looks angry, and you duck your head into your chest. 

“I’m sorry,” you mutter, “I know it was stupid but I just—” 

“What if you had gotten hurt, doll?” He interrupts, his grip on your shoulders tightening. “What then, huh? I’d never be able to forgive myself.” 

“Didn’t realize you cared that much about me,” you try to joke. His frown only deepens, and you begin to shrink in on yourself. 

“Of course I care about you!” Your heart begins to pound again. “You’re my best friend’s little sister, why wouldn’t I care about you?” And then it sinks. You just got best-friend’s-little-sister-zoned. 

You wonder if he ignored everything you’d said before the fall. Maybe he did. Maybe it’s for the best that he did. Save yourself the rejection, move on with your life. Easy enough. 

“I dunno,” you shrug, “figured you hated me enough to let me fall.” Hyunjae scoffs and grabs you by the arm to start dragging you back to the car.

“Idiot.”

~

“So what you’re telling me,” Haknyeon sits across from you, his chemistry textbook open but going ignored as he listens to you talk about what happened with Hyunjae. Since the staircase…incident he hasn’t spoken to you, and you really needed to pass chemistry so you enlisted your friend to help. “He calls you doll, acts like he hates you, then you confess to him and fall down the stairs, he saves you in the most romantic way, then brother’s-best-friend-zones you?” 

“Yeah, pretty much,” You dig your pencil into your lip, listening to it click while you read through one of the practice problems that Haknyeon gave you. “And since then he hasn’t spoken to me.” 

“What a dick. You’re doing that one wrong, by the way.” He slides his chair across the library’s old carpet to sit next to you. “Finding the delta-H of a reaction is products minus reactants, not the other way around.” His shoulder is brushing against yours while he explains and writes down how to do the problem correctly. 

One of the doors to the library opens and you glance up, almost immediately locking eyes with Hyunjae. Your stomach sinks when he narrows his eyes at Haknyeon.

“Oh shit,” you mutter, dropping your gaze again.

“Please don’t tell me that Lee Hyunjae just walked into the library and currently looks like he wants my head on a spike.” Your friend is now frozen, speaking quietly out of the corner of his mouth.

“I will not confirm nor deny any of what you just said.”

“If that man kills me, I will kill you.” Haknyeon hisses, and you just smile at him. Hyunjae is sitting at a table nearby, and you feel that familiar sinking feeling in your chest when he looks at you again.

“He’s not gonna kill you. Laugh as if I said something funny.” You jab him in the side and he starts cackling loudly, gathering the attention of several other students around you. “Not that loud, genius!” He quiets his laughter, and you can see the flush rising on his cheeks. “God you’re dumb.”

“What am I supposed to do? The hottest man I’ve ever seen looks like he’ll snap me in half if I touch you! I’m terrified!” He grabs you by the shoulder, and you hear his chair scrape against the ground. “Oh god he’s gonna kill me and it’s your fault, you bitch.” 

“Y/N,” Hyunjae’s hand comes to rest on your shoulder, and he bends down to the opposite ear so you can hear him better. Your body goes rigid, and you feel his breath brushing against the side of your neck. “A word, please?” You turn your head, leaning back so you aren’t so close to him. He’s staring at you, a mix of emotions swimming in his eyes. 

“Uh,” you glance at your friend, but he’s already shoving his face back into his textbook. “Yeah, sure. Hak, I’ll be—”

“Yup, go ahead, have fun.” Your friend spits out and then Hyunjae is pulling you up and walking you toward a dark corner of the library.

“Is this where you kill me?” You joke, but he doesn’t laugh. He’s facing away from you, hands shoved into the pockets of a loose jacket. “Damn, killjoy much?”

“You sure move on fast, huh?” You reel back and he turns to face you completely, a small smile practically stapled to his lips. “With tutoring, I mean. You were able to replace me just fine.”

“Oh, uh,” you blink, “yeah I guess. Hak is a great…teacher? Jaehyun are you okay?” His jaw tenses before he responds again, taking a few steps toward you until he’s just inches from you, and you’re pressed against a bookshelf. 

“You know you’re the only person who calls me Jaehyun? Not even my own parents call me that.” His head is tilted, his eyes half-lidded while he looks at you. “Why is that?”

“I, um,” your brain is faltering, overwhelmed by him. The way he looms over you, the way his fingers dance across your waist, the way he’s looking at you like you’re his last meal. “I don’t— spite, maybe? Jae, you’re getting really…really close.”

“Does that bother you, doll?” He asks, he’s only a few inches away, and you’re getting the urge to lean up and press your lips against his. 

“N-nope. Not at all. In fact,” Your hands are wrapped around his jacket, holding him so he can’t step away from you, “this is great.” He smiles, and you don’t see joy in it. You see mischief and lust. 

“Really?” 

“Mhm.” One of his hands slides up to grip your chin between his thumb and pointer finger. 

“And what if,” his voice is just a whisper, his breath fanning your cheek when he tilts your head to the side. “I did this?”

His lips are warm against your skin. Warm, and soft, and your breath is hitching in your throat andd you know he can feel it. Hyunjae kisses your neck right below your ear, his teeth just scraping against the tender skin and his lips sucking gently. Your eyes are fluttering, your body leaning closer to his. His hand releases your jaw, finding its way back to your waist while your own hands slide up to tangle in his hair. 

He slides his lips down, trailing them across your neck and sucking little pink marks into the skin. 

“Should—” you stumble over your sentence when Hyunjae pulls your shirt to the side, placing kisses to your collarbone. “Should we b-be doing this?” He hums, and the vibrations against your skin have you gasping.

“What do you mean, doll?” He pulls away, leaning back up to look you in the eye. His eyes are halflidded and dark, filled with the lust you had seen in his smile. Your jaw drops open a bit, your hands sliding back down to his shoulders when he leans toward you again. 

“I just— I mean— what would Sangyeon think?” Hyunjae rolls his eyes. “I’m seri—” He’s kissing you before you can finish that sentence. It’s a rough, searing kiss and the suddenness has you gasping. With your mouth now open, Hyunjae is able to slip his tongue into your mouth. It dances along your own, tracing every inch of the wet cavern of your mouth. Your lips are slightly chapped against his, and you wonder if he notices. You wonder if he cares, but the way he groans against your mouth tells you he doesn’t. That he cares only about the way your lips mold against his, the way your tongue dances against his own, and the way your body seems to fit perfectly to his. 

“Who—” his lips press against yours as he speaks, “cares— what— he— thinks?”

Hyunjae presses further against you, pressing you into the bookshelf, and you can feel the kiss becoming sloppy. You can feel the spit beginning to slide down your chin, but when you try to wipe it away your brother’s best friend pins your arm above your head. You squeak into his mouth, feeling him smile against you. 

He pulls back just slightly, catching your lower lip between his teeth and watching your eyes flutter, listening to the whine that escapes you. 

Hyunjae says something to you, something you don’t catch, and then he squeezes your hip.

“Sorry. What did you say?” He smiles, and this time you know he’s amused. There’s a little twinkle in his eye, and you find yourself smiling along with him.

“I said,” he drawls, “that we should get out of here.” 

“Oh…” you hum. “Yeah, no, yeah we should.” He tilts your head up again, his eyes narrowing.

“Are you okay, doll?” 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” You reassure him, “Just…a little shocked, I guess?” 

“Shocked,” he echoes, tilting his head to the side. “Shocked about what, doll?” You shrug, your cheeks starting to burn from the way he stares at you. 

“You’re just…you’re a really good kisser.” You’re mumbling, but you know by the way his smile grows that he heard you.

“What was that?” He coos, turning his head so he can “hear you better”. You scoff. “I didn’t quite catch what you said. I’m a really good what?”

“I said you’re a dick,” you snap and push him away from you, your cheeks now blazing. He trails after you, practically giggling at the reaction he pulled out of you. Haknyeon is still at the table when you come into view and you see his eyes go wide when he sees you.

“What…happened to you?” You grab your jacket and bag, shaking your head. 

“I’ll tell you tomorrow, Hak.” You feel Hyunjae’s hand on the small of your back, urging you along and you watch your best friend’s eyes bug out of his head. 

“He— you— are you two—”

“She said she’ll tell you tomorrow, Hak.” Hyunjae says sharply, now firmly pushing you along. “Let’s go, doll.” 

~

You’re in his car, straddling his waist in the backseat. Your lips are pressed against his in a rough kiss, much sloppier than in the library. It’s a mess of tongue and teeth and spit and his skin is so warm against yours. Your hands are underneath his shirt, but his are under your own shirt. You can feel goosebumps rising on your skin where his hands trace. Your waist, your stomach, your back, underneath your breasts. He’s so gentle with you. You, on the other hand, are rough. Your hands are digging into the skin of his abdomen, sliding across his abs and up to his chest. He hisses when your nails dig into him, undoubtedly leaving little crescents into his golden skin. 

You pull away only briefly, a string of spit connected between the two of you. He’s staring at you with awestruck eyes, staring at the marks he left on your skin, at the knots he made in your hair, at the stretched collar of your shirt from where he pulled on it. 

“What happened to what Sangyeon would think?” Hyunjae’s hand slip to cup your ass over your jeans. 

“I’m not the one that’s gonna have to tell him that his best friend fucked his little sister in the backseat of his car in the library parking lot.” You tug your shirt over your head, tossing it to the front seat. To be fair, Hyunjae moved the car into the darkest corner of the lot, but his windows weren’t tinted and if security came around to check what was up, you’d both be fucked (in more ways than one). “Besides, should you really be worrying about that right now?”

Hyunjae lowers his mouth to your chest, placing wet, sloppy kisses to the soft skin while you unhook your bra and let it slide off your arms. 

“You’re really gonna make me do it? All on my own?” He gazes up at you and you can only smile at him.

“If you want me to suck your dick, yeah. You will.” His grip on your waist tightens and his eyes go wide. You lift his head, connecting your lips again as you begin to roll your hips against his. He hisses out, letting his head fall back at the sudden pressure against his growing erection. You let your eyes drift closed, enjoying the friction, enjoying the pleasure each roll of your hips sends up your spine until you decide it isn’t enough. Until the quiet, gasping breaths that escape the boy under you aren’t enough. Until you need more.

You force yourself off of him, pushing yourself as far back as you can in the cramped backseat of his car, the little waves of pleasure dissipating as you undo the button of your pants and begin to tug them down. Hyunjae watches you, eyes hazy and chest heaving under his shirt. You pause in your motions and stare at him with a cocked eyebrow. 

“What?” He exhales heavily and you scoff, kicking his leg. He hisses, lifting his head and glaring at you.

“You really think I’m gonna be the only one undressing? Take your shit off, Lee Jaehyun.” He sits up, leaning toward you. Challenging you.

“Why would I do that, doll?” He coos. “I quite enjoy the little show you’re putting on for me.” You can hear the little tremor in his voice, can see his cock straining against his jeans. You love the act he puts on, the way he wants you to think he’s in charge, so you play along.

You widen your eyes, playing the role of a desperate little girl. He may be older, but you’re smarter. You’ve known him long enough to get an idea of what he likes, just based on what you’ve accidentally overheard from his conversations with your older brother. 

“Jae,” you practically purr, leaning forward and letting him see the way you’re squeezing your breasts together with your arms. He watches you lace your hands together, tenses when you place them on his knees and bring yourself forward until your mouth is right next to his ear. His breathing hitches when your breasts brush against his chest. “Can you please take your clothes off, baby?” You press a gentle kiss to his jaw. “I promise I’ll be good.” 

He doesn’t respond, but you can hear him shuffling, hear the zipper of his pants and feel him shoving the garment down his legs as fast as he can. His shirt follows after, and you lean back with a pretty little smile on your lips as you slowly pull your jeans down. Hyunjae watches you carefully, practically drooling as more and more of your skin is exposed to him. More for him to touch, to feel, to play with. 

When the last bit of your legs is exposed and your jeans are thrown to the side, he tugs you onto his lap again. You both hiss when his fully erect cock presses against your core, when the slick fabric of your underwear brushes against him and leaves a small damp spot on his boxers. Your hand rises to the back of his neck, nails scratching gently as you begin to roll your hips again. 

You aren’t slow this time, you aren’t gentle with him. You grind against him as if you’re already riding his cock. You roll your hips in gentle circles, pressing down hard with each drag of your hips. This is the pleasure you were searching for. This is soothing the ache that had been building and building since the night at the staircase. 

You listen to the pitiful whines that leave Hyunjae’s mouth, listen to the gasps, and the pleas. You feel the way he lifts his hips to meet yours, thrusting harder and harder with each moan of his name that leaves your mouth. 

“D-doll,” Hyunjae whimpers, “Y/N, please. ‘M s-so close, doll, please.” 

“Please what, baby?” You lower your head to his neck, sucking harsh purple marks into his skin and running your tongue over each one to sooth the burn you know is there. “Hmm? What do you need from your doll?”

“You pro-promised,” he pleaded, squeezing at your hips and trying desperately to get you to stop. You can feel his dick twitching underneath you, and your hips only move faster and harder against him. You can see the tears welling up in his eyes. 

“What did I promise, Jae?” You ask. “Tell me.”

“You prom— promised you’d— that you’d suck me off.” You kiss your teeth, slowing your hips. Your own body is screaming at you, begging you for the release you’d just ripped away from both of you. You, unlike Hyunjae, are good at hiding how desperate you really are to have him inside of you. He’s still thrusting into you, whining at the loss of pleasure. 

“I did, didn’t I?” You run the back of your hand down his cheek and watch him lean into your touch. “I can’t let my baby suffer now, hmm? Not after he asked so nicely.” 

Hyunjae watches in awe as you slide to the ground in front of him, tugging his boxers down with you. He watches as you brush your hand over his leaking cock, running your thumb over the slit and digging in. He whines loudly, jerking his hips into your touch. 

You pull your hand away just briefly to spit into your palm, using that and the pearly liquid leaking from his tip to help run your hand up and down on his length, squeezing gently when you get closer to his tip. 

When your lips finally wrap around him, a shudder runs down Hyunjae’s body, his back arching and his head falling back. There’s a brief moment between when you first put your mouth on him to when you begin to suck, one where you just watch the older boy twitch and shudder under your touch. 

You don’t linger too long, shifting and rising a bit on your knees so you can take more of him down your throat. Your hands grip at his thighs, squeezing tightly when he hits the back of your throat and you have to hold yourself back from gagging. You pull yourself back up, suckling at his tip before bringing yourself back down onto him, taking a bit more of him into your mouth. You repeat these actions until you’re able to take all of him into your mouth. 

From there, when you take him down your throat you moan around him, letting the vibrations hit him until his hips jerk up and he’s sent impossibly farther down your throat before pulling yourself back up and digging your tongue into his slit and drinking in the precum that leaks from his cock. He’s a whining, blubbering mess, begging you to go faster. To make him cum. To do anything except tease him, but you don’t listen. You take your time, occasionally pulling off his dick entirely just to watch him suffer. 

“‘M close again,” he chokes out, barely heard above the sloppy noises of you choking on his cock time and time again. His eyes, up until this point, have been squeezed shut. He’s afraid that if he looks at you, he’ll bust right then and there. “Fuck, doll, please.” 

He makes the fatal mistake of opening his eyes, making direct eye contact with you. His breath hitches in his throat again, his chest tightening. You look so messy, drool running down your chin and onto his balls. Your make up is running down your cheeks, your hands squeezing so tightly at his thighs. 

It just takes you sending him into the back of your throat one more time for him to regain control of himself, gripping your hair and sitting up a bit. Your eyes go wide when he thrusts into your mouth the first time. He hears you gag, but he’s just so close. He’s so close, and he can’t help how his hips move faster and faster, each brush of his tip against the back of your throat sending him spiraling just a bit more out of control.

“You thought I’d just let you take control?” he hisses, tugging your face towards his hips when you try to pull away. He can hear your muffled sobs, hear you gagging on him. “Let you run this show? Pretty girl, you have no idea what you just got yourself in—to—” He stutters his last word, his eyes rolling into the back of his head while he empties his load into your throat. He hears you choke and pulls back, letting the last ropes of cum paint your cheeks and your chin while more spills out the side of your mouth. 

Hyunjae gasps for breath, watching you pull yourself back onto the seat with your back pressed against the door. He watches you run your fingers through the mess on the lower half of your face, bringing it to your lips. You whine at the taste of him, and he feels his cock twitching back to life already. 

Then he notices the lack of underwear on your body. Sometime between you taking control, and him forcing it back you stripped yourself of the last bit of clothing on your body. He turns toward you, wrapping a hand around each of your legs to spread you open. Your eyes are wide again, and you try to protest when he lowers himself to be face-to-face with your sopping wet cunt. 

“Such a pretty doll,” he murmurs, bringing a finger to your slit and collecting some of your juices. Your body twitches, trying to pull away from him but he just pulls you closer. “So cute, still trying to be in control of something.” 

He runs his tongue all the way up the length of your pussy, stopping to suck on your clit before bringing his tongue back down and repeating that again and again and again. You writhe underneath him, moaning loudly when he digs his tongue into you, practically fucking you with it before he’s slipping two fingers inside of you. You knew it would sting with just one of his fingers, but the burn of two fingers pushing inside of you and immediately beginning to pump in and out of you at a rapid pace has you crying out and curling away from him. He just holds you closer, his fingers scissoring in and out and his mouth sucking relentlessly and the knot inside of you is growing so tight, your body curling and your hands gripping his hair tightly. 

Then your body goes slack, your vision blurring and your ears ringing as you release all over the bottom half of his face. He doesn’t relent, doesn’t stop drinking up your release until you’re kicking your legs and shoving his body away from you. 

You both gasp for breath, trying to recover. Your body is tingling with your release and you can see Hyunjae leaning against the door opposite you, running his hand up and down his length while he watches you, waiting for his cock to become erect again so he can fuck you.

“So,” his voice is rough, “now that we’re somewhat even, I vote that we both tell Sangyeon that I fucked his little sister in the backseat of my car.” You roll your eyes.

“I just gave you the best suck of your life, and you think I’m gonna tell my big brother that his best friend fucked me? His best friend that’s two years older than me?”

“You’re 21,” Hyunjae frowns, “two years isn’t that bad. If you were 14 and I was 16, then it would be weird, but that’s not the case. We’re both legal adults in college.” His hand slows on his cock, but he keeps his fingers wrapped around the tip. You run your tongue over your lip.

“Jaehyun, I thought you hated me. What changed?” He shrugged.

“Simple. I never hated you. Sure for a while you were just my best friend’s annoying sister, but like…I dunno. I never really hated you, I just didn’t know how else to interact with you. What about you? I thought you hated being around me.”

“Yeah because I wanted to make out with you half the time you were around,” you roll your eyes and let your head rest against the steamed window. Hyunjae sputters out a laugh, throwing his head back and yelping when it slams against the glass. You gasp and jump forward, crawling over his lap to cradle his head.

“Shit, Jae, are you alright?” You run your fingers through his hair, feeling for where his hit his head. He lets his forehead rest against your collarbone, still laughing. “Why would you throw your head back like that?”

“You sure have a funny way of showing that you like me, you know that, doll?” His lips press gently into your skin and you flick the side of his head. He hisses under his breath and pinches your hip. 

“You worry me sometimes, Lee Jaehyun.” He hums and brings his hands to your hips. “You gonna fuck me now?” He kisses his teeth and pushes you off his lap until you’re on the leather seats again. 

“Hands and knees, doll,” he instructs and you grin.

“Ooh, doggy style. Didn’t think you liked that kind of thing.” You roll onto your hands and knees, lowering the front half of your torso until you’re able to lay your head on your hands and (sort of) gaze back at Hyunjae. You watch him pull a foil packet out of the center console and click your tongue. “Only use one if you want to. I’m clean and on birth control. As long as you’re clean and fine with it, you don’t have to.” You watch the man behind you shudder again.

“God, Sangyeon really is gonna fuckin’ kill me, doll.”

“Problem for tomorrow, really.” You suck in a sharp breath when you feel his tip pressing into your entrance. A quite whine escapes you at the stretch, and Hyunjae rubs your sides to sooth you while he continues to slowly press himself inside of you.

“Almost there, baby.” He assures you. “Just a bit over halfway.”

“Are you shitting me?” you whine. “Why the fuck are you so big?”

“Good genetics, doll.” You feel his hips against your ass and your body relaxes slightly. “Tell me when, okay?” 

“Just fucking go already,” you hiss, fighting through the stretch. “God, just fuck me Hyunjae, please.” Your hips roll back against his and he exhales shakily. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me.”

“It’s either me or my brother, pick one baby.” 

Your teeth dig into your lip when Hyunjae gives an experimental, shallow thrust into you. He pulls out a few more inches and thrusts into you again. When he pulls himself out all the way to the tip, he inhales sharply before plunging into you. Your body jerks forward at the force of it, a moan escaping you, and then he’s plowing into you at full force. 

Hyunjae drives his hips into you hard and fast, your body jerking forward so much that you have to grab onto the door to stop yourself from hitting it. The moans you let out become loud cries and screams of his name and you know that if there’s anyone left in the parking lot, they’ll know exactly what’s happening. You can only pray that they know better than to approach the window, pray that they can’t see the way you beg for Hyunjae to move faster, to go harder if that were possible. 

“Such a good, pretty girl for me,” Hyunjae tangles a hand in your hair, yanking you back into his chest. The new angle has his cock driving into that spongey spot inside of you time and time again. “So pretty like this, filled with me. But what would Sangyeon think, hm? What will he think of his pretty little sister getting fucked senseless by his best friend, someone he trusted to look after her while she studies?”

“F-fuck, Hyunjae, please!” You beg, clawing at his hands and his hips and the back of his neck. “Fuck, harder, baby, harder!’

“You want me to go harder baby?” Hyunjae coos, sliding one of his hands down to your clit. “Want your brother’s best friend to fuck you until you can’t breathe? Until you’re begging me to stop?”

“Yes,” you cry out, “please please please, Hyunjae!” He groans, loud and raspy in your ear and you can feel your abdomen starting to tighten okay. “Oh god, I’m so close baby please! So close, so close!” 

“I know baby,” he grunts, “fuck, you’re so fucking tight around me, doll.” 

His fingers are rubbing harsh circles around your sensitive clit, the callouses of his hands providing that delicious friction to drive you straight over the edge screaming his name and squeezing tightly around his cock like a vice until he can only grind his hips into you, and then he’s groaning and warm ropes of cum are filling you and spilling out around his cock. 

It takes the two of you a few minutes to recover before he’s pulling tissues and wipes out of his glove compartment and gently wiping away any traces of his release. When he gets to your face, he can only smile at the dazed look in your eyes.

“So, I take it I’m telling your brother?”

“You can bet your ass you are.” He hums and places a featherlight kiss to your lips. 

“You called me Hyunjae for the first time.” You hum.

“Don’t get used to it, Lee Jaehyun. It was heat of the moment.” He laughs, tugging his boxers and jeans back onto his body before helping you with your bra and underwear. 

“I meant it, you know.” He says when he’s got you situated in the front seat of the car. You look at him with tired eyes, enjoying the heat that comes with his car being on. Your seat is reclined so you can rest on your way home, and one of your hands is wrapped in Hyunjae’s. “When I told you that I never hated you. And if you’d let me, I want to take you out on a date after finals.” 

The thought brings a gentle smile onto your face.

“Only if Sangyeon doesn’t kill you first.”

~

It’s two days later when you force Hyunjae to tell him. The marks on your neck, and the scratches on Hyunjae’s haven’t faded in the slightest, and you know Sangyeon has been asking his best friend about them. 

You’d been sitting on your bed with your boyfriend when Sangyeon burst into the room, yelling at you about the dishes and stopping when he saw the two of you curled up on your comforter. You could see his mind trying to click everything into place, followed by your brother taking a few steps forward and Hyunjae sliding off your bed to get to your open window. 

“LEE JAEHYUN YOU’RE SO FUCKING DEAD!” Your brother screams out the open window while Hyunjae makes a run for his house, one hand thrown into the air. 

“WORTH IT!” You hear him yell, and you can’t muffle the laugh you let out before your brother turns on you with nothing but rage in those brown eyes of his. 

“Lee Y/N,” he hisses.

“In my defense, it was all him.” You back away from your brother, shuffling to the edge of your room.

“You’re dating my best friend?” 

“Maybe? Depends on how you react to either answer.”

“Oh, I’m gonna fucking kill you both.”

“Only if you can catch us!” You bolt out of your room, screaming when you hear him pounding after you. 

Maybe telling your brother wasn’t the best idea. But, then again, it was all worth it in the end. Dying young wouldn’t be so bad, at least in your eyes.

#itsbeeble #itsbeeble masterlist #kpop #kpop imagines #the boyz #the boyz imagines #hyunjae imagines #lee hyunjae #hyunjae x reader #tbz #tbz imagines #kpop smut #the boyz smut #tbz smut

[comradekatara]

In your modern au who in the gang goes to college/grad school and what subjects do they study? would they end up at schools close to home or go far away? How do there relationships change after highschool and with people moving away?

okay wow that’s a great question but also. a lot.

aang is a year below katara so his top choice school is just. the school katara goes to. it’s small and affordable and he studies philosophy and religion (but also takes any sort of fun elective offered to him) and joins a lot of clubs and makes a lot of friends and generally just has a nice time. he and katara overlap for three years but after she graduates they still live together, so he basically sees her every day anyway. it’s nice :)

katara genuinely considers not going to college but then she gets a sports scholarship she’d be a fool to reject so she’s like “fine, i’ll go, but i’m gonna phone it in the entire time.” she assumes that college will basically just be like high school, yet another prison where she will be forced to do math against her will. but she actually finds that she kind of enjoys some of her classes, and she can devote way more time to sports, and azula isn’t there (a weight has been lifted off her shoulders truly), and she actually meets a whole group of people who don’t find her intimidating and abrasive, but instead share her interests and actually organize with her. also, the fact that sokka isn’t there means that she doesn’t constantly have to compare herself to an impossible standard, and she finds that she actually enjoys learning when she gets to go at her own pace. and in fact…. she’s actually a great writer???? and really enjoys theory and philosophy and criticism and history and sociology and literature????? and she might actually be really fucking smart????? she graduates with honors. but there’s absolutely no way she’s pursuing grad school lmao. everyone knows that shit is a scam.

sokka goes to princeton for undergrad because, and i quote, “it’s nearby.” full ride, obviously. he double majors in physics and engineering, and also accidentally fulfills an art history minor without even noticing. everyone assumes that he’ll get a phd (at least one), but katara keeps insisting that grad school is a scam and so is the ivy league. and it’s not even that sokka necessarily disagrees with her, he just thinks that those are bold words coming from the girl who fell for a pyramid scheme. twice.

zuko goes to a small liberal arts college for undergrad and spends years attempting to justify his choice of going to a smaller, slightly less prestigious school by majoring in something dignified and respectable, like econ or business or engineering. none of which he is any good at. but eventually, after enough time spent beyond ozai’s purview, zuko just goes “fuck it” and double majors in theater and classics. his focus is on ancient greek drama. he then does a poetry mfa wherein he attempts to write on earth we’re briefly gorgeous without just rewriting on earth we’re briefly gorgeous (many such cases). he complains about his program constantly and how fake and pretentious it all is, but anyone who knows him can tell that it’s clearly the most fun he’s ever had.

suki doesn’t go to college. she figures that there’s no point in blowing money she doesn’t have and wasting precious valuable years of her time getting a fancy little bachelor’s degree she’ll never use for a job that doesn’t actually require one. and she doesn’t have any adult figures in her life to convince her that college is necessary (although sokka does spend a full week going “but are you sure…?” before suki realizes that she can just shut him up forever by claiming she can’t afford it). she continues to teach at the dojo, but because she basically already lives in her truck, she’s always driving over to princeton to crash in sokka’s dorm. she spends a lot of time just hanging out in the library while he does work, and finds that she doesn’t even need to go to classes to learn new things by herself. it’s funny how a formal education can make learning seem so much less interesting than it actually is. if she had actually gone to college, she probably would’ve spent the entire time blowing off classes and doing as little work as possible, but since she has no incentive to learn, she actually does. by the time sokka has graduated, suki is basically qualified to practice medicine, could tell you the entire history of the inca empire, and is basically an expert in mycology. and it didn’t cost a cent.

toph considers suki an inspiration, and by the time she graduates, she is already so estranged from her parents that she also has the agency to just blow off that whole thing. she moves in with sokka and mai and just follows them around. she sits in on their lectures whenever she feels like it (they claim she is mai’s little sister who is visiting her), and otherwise just kind of lounges about. occasionally sokka will be like “you know you could’ve just… gone to this school, right??? you’re literally a child prodigy and your parents are crazy rich.” to which toph just shrugs like “yeah……but nah.”

mai goes to princeton with sokka. it wasn’t even her top choice school, but once she realized that it’s where sokka was going, she couldn’t think of anywhere else that she would rather be. they’re roommates since freshman year and are basically inseparable. everyone assumes they’re dating, but sokka’s like “nah she’s gay, she’s just really clingy :)” which mai hates because he’s totally ruining her street cred. she’s a cs major, but she basically accumulates the credits for a math minor, a physics minor, and an english minor because all the cs classes are so easy for her (she first taught herself how to code when she was like six). sokka somehow convinces her to join his physics program for grad school, but after a year she drops out because she finds it so miserable. they continue living together, of course, while mai gets really into making esoteric indie games. zuko doesn’t really understands how video games work, but she still bounces her ideas off him because he’s the most ruthless critic she knows.

ty lee goes to college because it’s the sort of thing a girl from a decently respectable family does, but she’s pretty envious of suki’s lifestyle and wishes she could just blow off the entire thing. she goes to a decent school, one that appears acceptable on resumes but not so elite that it will raise any employer’s standards too high; she enjoys being underestimated. being in an entirely new environment gives her the opportunity to test out new personas free of consequence, and eventually she realizes that she’s kind of wasting her talents by pretending to be dumber than she is, so she actually applies herself and does really well. but then she gets bored of applying herself because now everyone expects too much of her and she misses when a B was considered a good grade. she’s technically a dance major because it’s the only thing she does consistently across three years (she graduates early), but she goes through different phases where she’s really into various fields, including but not limited to: abnormal psych, quantum physics, philosophical ethics, north african literature, microbiology, and women’s rugby. she keeps in touch with azula, mai, and suki, but she also just goes through phases of avoiding contact with all her former friends entirely. it’s fun to be aloof.

and last but certainly not least, azula goes to harvard for undergrad, and then harvard law. in fact, there is no other school azula could ever go to. even if she had lived on the other side of the globe, and not new jersey (or as she likes to call it, “manhattan”), azula would still go to harvard. she truly believes that it is the only school on earth capable of withstanding her towering intellect. anyone who found her insufferable in high school is in for a rude surprise once they realize that within a semester, harvard has somehow made her ten times worse. she’s technically pre-law, but she also studies pre-med and engineering, just in case. which is far too much for any one human to handle, and she ends up suffering a nervous breakdown during junior year where she eats nothing but cheetos for a week straight and tries to cut her own bangs with a pair of kiddie scissors. zuko and sokka go to cambridge to stage an intervention (mai and ty lee were too busy washing their hair that weekend) and help her out. you can tell it’s bad because she actually agrees to go to therapy. eventually she gets through it and decides to take a gap year before law school. she spends her gap year as a paralegal at a highly prestigious firm, and within the first couple years of graduating law school, she makes junior partner there. and they never speak of the cheetos and uneven bangs incident ever again.

in terms of who keeps in touch with whom, obviously mai, sokka, suki, and toph still hang out all the time after high school. mai and sokka are roommates for their entire twenties basically, and toph and suki pretty much also live with them. mai and sokka move to new york after princeton. and after zuko graduates, he also moves in with them. aang and katara sort of resist the idea of living in a big city, and instead decide to travel the world after aang graduates. but then when they go to visit sokka & co. katara realizes that it’s always secretly been her lifelong dream to work at a really cute little overpriced coffeeshop in brooklyn, and so she and aang get an apartment in like. red hook or something. ty lee actually moves to california, so they all assume they won’t see her often, but she flies back every time one of her sisters has a birthday, so they actually run into her pretty frequently. eventually she moves back to the east coast, and pretty soon after that she and mai uhaul together. none of them really hear from azula except for mai and ty lee, who are in a semi-active groupchat with her. but she and zuko reconnect after ozai’s funeral, and she gradually befriends the rest of the gaang, even if she never quite gets along with katara. so yeah, there are a few years where most of them don’t really talk to one another, but eventually they do manage to reconnect and stay in each other’s lives. they do all make other friends though. god could you imagine.

#averyho #asks #the gaang and #modern au #this was a fun one #the inherent comedy of being from new jersey. etc. etc.

[grendelsmilf]

that last sentence knocked me out because i just automatically assumed that this was an astro professor.. do you think all stem majors study econ. like you haven’t even known whimsy until you’ve met some real math freaks. be serious rn

#this is so sad #o

[homoerotic]

im just feeling very demoralized. exceedingly so. i want to be a radiographer so badly. i wish i had known sooner but i want this so so so bad. and i cant help but think the reason i didnt get in this time is due to two things:

1. i had one (1) C on my transcript. in ECON. a class that has no bearing on my major but dampened my gpa exponentially

2. i had a panic attack during the venipuncture lab in one of my rad classes because i didnt adequately prepare myself for it. and i distinctly remembering my professor telling me "if you cant do this you arent cut out for this major" so i bet she brought that up during deliberation.

its not fair man. i dont live at home w my parents, i dont have a free schedule to study constantly. i have so many bills, so many doctors appointments and health issues to handle. i have to take care of my family.

i have such a bad needle phobia that i am actively working on. its bullshit! you dont NEED to do venipuncture as a radiographer! if i was specializing in CT/nucmed then YES 100% i understand that due to administering contrast. but every single nurse and radiographer ive spoken to has told me that learning that is a waste of time for me.

so how do i prove that im capable of handling the sight of needles now? drawing blood =/= seeing patients get their blood drawn/have IVs. they are not the same. i even wrote a whole essay about my phobia for that professor to help her see my side of it all. isnt it enough that im willing to expose myself to this daily because of how bad i want this?

i was fine, REALLY, i was fine not getting in this time. i really was because i was told left and right that getting in your first time is as likely as the lottery. so why does the girl that i see every single week for the past two semesters get in her first time? the same girl that ive constantly had to help through math and chemistry. who isnt confident in any of her homework answers. who needs me to hold her hand all the time through the complicated concepts.

and i know thats not fair of me to be angry at her. i know she works hard. she has good grades. shes in the honors program. but we both have medical experience. im 5+ years older than her. what did her personal statement have that mine didnt? why wasnt i good enough.

i know i am being over dramatic and acting very entitled but i cannot help but be angry and upset over this because i want this SO BADLY. i want this more than anything else and now i have to wait another year for it. a whole year of my life for the next slim chance of being picked. and what if im denied again? i'll be 27.

i want to start my career. i want to help my partner pay for our bills again. i want to stop struggling to survive. but now i have to wait and wait and wait. and i have to bend over backwards this next application period. get more certifications, dedicate more of my limited free time to volunteering. retake classes for a better gpa. spend more money. kill myself faster. struggle struggle struggle.

im so tired. im so fucking tired. im sick of being a student. im sick of college. im sick of feeling this age gap with my peers. im sick of being lonely. im sick of not being good enough. im sick of it all.

#shiba noises

[dreamertrilogys]

first second day of senior yr class ratings <3

1st period econ: class itself is very fun + i love the teacher + i have a friend in it. BUT all it’s taught me so far (2 classes) is that i need to rethink the idea of being a business major bc i cannot deal with these business bros anymore. so so sick of those annoying cunts fr. 7/10

2nd period spare: yippee yay very fun i do nothing for now. alas i can’t leave school early/come late with this period spare but it’s ok. only problem is a girl from my sunday school class when i was 10 has the same spare as me and i’m worried if we spend too much time together she’s gonna recognize me again (since 10th grade french class) (which was b4 my social transition). anyway 8/10 but i’m thinking of switching to a bio class if there’s one offered at this time

lunch: get to see my friends. 10/10

3rd period advanced functions: well. teacher seems VERY boring and incapable of holding my attention i’m so sorry 😕 also i need to get like a 95 in this course so yknow [mimes hanging myself] BUT it’s okay bc i have a couple of friends (including situationship :/) in the class. 8/10

last bio: the teacher seems VERY nice but also hard as fuckkk. also the class is a split btwn the reg stream (me) & the advanced math/sci program at my school (?????) which is so weird they’re supposed to have separate classes than us for a reason but ok.. also decent ppl in my class so 7/10

#hello hi #.txt #suicide ment #?? #for the joke abt math

[double-j]

17 questions, 17 people

thank you for the tag @antiquitea

nickname: jess

sign: leo, and yes i do have the co-star app. (which today asked me "are you ignorning your sadness?" so that's great). anyway my friend who made me download the app would want me to specify that i am a leo sun, cancer moon, scorpio ascendant.

height: 5'5"

last thing i googled: how to rearrange photos on a tumblr post LOL

song stuck in head: "arabella" by arctic monkeys

number of followers: 217

amount of sleep: usually shoot for 7-8, sometimes 6. i used to be an intense sleeper, like 9-12 hours every night, it was not great. feel much more like a person now, haha

lucky number: 3

dream job: legit i do not wanna work, oops. changed my major 4 times in undergrad (econ, econ&math, computer engineering, film&tv), added a minor because i still wasn't sold on my major (poli sci), then panicked senior year and applied to law school. now i do in fact have two degrees staring at me and don't really want to do anything with either one, but couldn't tell you anything else that i'd rather do either. sometimes think i would maybe go back and do something with film&tv, like editing, but ya never know.

wearing: aerie leggings, savagexfenty ribbed tank, savagexfenty cropped hoodie, claw clip, white ankle socks seemingly from old navy. pretty much your everyday WFH fit for me, though lately i've been subbing the hoodie for a flannel.

movies/books that summarise you: omg hahaha just realizing i was thinking about this one and never changed it okay wow. give me some time and maybe i will think of something cause right now only the most tragic books and movies are coming to me and that’s just not accurate

favourite song: usual go to when asked for all time fave is "sweet child o' mine" by guns 'n roses. a mix of current and long-term faves, courtesy of my spotify wrapped hitting today: "atlantic city" by the band; "mardy bum" by arctic monkeys; "high infidelity" by taylor swift; "vanilla" by flipturn; "still the one" by shania twain; and "julia" by mt. joy.

favourite instrument: drums. have been harassing my husband to let me buy myself/buy me a drum kit.

aesthetic: just took a buzzfeed quiz that told me it's "dark academia" and also "4am at the airportcore." feel like that vaguely fits my personal style, because i typically dress like it's 4am at the airport, and on the rare occasion that i do go out i suppose it's vaguely dark academia? idk.

favorite author: ya girl reads almost exclusively romance novels, okay? so mostly whatever is recommended to me on the kindle app, recently read a ton from natasha knight. my sister is a diehard colleen hoover fan, which i have heard is vvv basic/lame (sorry if she's ur fave), and i've given her one opportunity to convince me. she has me reading november 9, and i cannot get past the first chapter right now.

random fun fact: i mean i feel like i just gave way too much info to every question above, lol, but my go to fun fact in college was always that i still have one of my baby teeth. still do now, as a 27 year old. no adult tooth was ever underneath. luckily it's a molar so not visible from the front, cause it is incredibly short.

no pressure tags: @theharddeck; @fandomxpreferences; @cherrycola27; @imjess-themess; @wildbornsiren; @roosterforme; @3tabbiesandalab; @thesewordsareallihavetogive; @justfandomwritings; @callsignvalley

#personal #tag challenge

[khodorkovskaya]

06.10.23

i had a sort of "light at the end of the tunnel" moment this week. in the sense that (1) i received my grades like printed out like physically on paper and seeing it like this made something in my brain tilt. it's a list of every single subject id taken for my bachelors and every single grade id ever received. and at the bottom it says "the degree is successfully completed". and i swear something in my brain shifted. i was like "ah, here we are, all is good now".

(2) although ive been struggling with my new status as an econ major lol it's also been a kinda satisfying. bc my maths background is really paying off. like THIS is what it was all for. i understand things others don't. and it gives me this like sort of satisfaction like, the struggle's in the past, all is good, it was worth it. and my perception of myself is different. i feel like im worth something. im not just a student. im still a student obviously, but i already have a diploma that's worth something. i no longer feel like a nobody, you know?

and (3), i think the biggest change in perspective i had this week is that my zurich friend got a job. not a student job, not a little freelance job or whatver, no... like a job job. six figures, company phone, cubicle, coffee machine, paid pension, paid holidays job job at a big international company. he literally finished his degree on monday and here we go.

and it's funny bc you know how id always say that talking about the future to people my age makes me depressed. bc it always makes me question who i am and if im doing the right thing and "look at them all getting jobs, while im just a loser" ? well, i didn't feel that way with my zurich friend. his announcement also gave me satisfaction and relief. i was like "huh, this is what it's all for, this is what im working towards".

it's funny cos like the job that he got is sort of similar to what im studying. obvs the domain of the company is different and the skillset needed is not exactly what i have. but with my qualifications i could do it at a different kind of company. and heck, that's basically the only thing i can do with my qualifications.... like THIS is what it's all for. THIS is how the outside world sees me.

and yeah, it all felt like finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. like everything's becoming a little clearer. and i can't describe to you guys how good having a degree feels. it's done, it's over. i will forever have it like a tattoo. every job i'll apply for, every motivational letter i'll write, every story i'll tell, every single time i'll have to present myself, it'll be there. im forever diplômée en mathématiques and it feels so fucking good.

#october

[nobully]

⭐️☎🎼👋!

RELATIONSHIP BUILDING

Send ⭐️ (or multiple) for a headcanon about our muses.

Because of Wang Yi's lie, he's actually started trying to write a book. It's pretty much a copy of the first two novel worlds he's been in, though recently the main characters have been overtaken by some minor characters with telling similarities to Zhilan and others he knows in the city. (He particularly enjoyed making Nicolette the big villain of one story arc, which he didn't try to hide at all.) Most of the time his manuscript stays at home, though; it's only when he meets Zhilan in the library for more research that he takes it with him as "work materials."

Send ☎ for your muse’s info in my muses phone (name, ringtone, picture, last text received/sent).

photo: (A very straightforward picture taken of Zhilan sitting at the library desk, smiling neatly for the camera with the sun streaming through the windows beside him. Wang Yi just asked for one for his contacts and the other agreed.) name: 小兰 ("little lan") ringtone: something bright with bells last texts received + sent zhilan: [long text dump about interesting lore goes here] wang yi: whoa that sounds neat wang yi: so what about Y zhilan: [lengthy explanation about Y, plus links to PDFs and relevant websites] wang yi: cool wang yi: yeah i agreed with the author on X, but i think he was off about Z zhilan: [starts expounding on Z vs. X from the literary perspective] wang yi: [joins in but from the science/math perspective since he majored in chem and econ] *nerd energy intensifies*

Send 🎼 for a song that reminds me of our muses.

Laura Brehm - "Awake and Dreaming" (you had the best of me according to your idea of how you wanted me)

Send 👋 for three things that describe our muses relationship.

The dusty smell of books mixing with that potent but soothing scent of sunshine

Birds in an early autumn courtyard singing a duet in the morning, soft if a little lonely

That moment between waking up and opening your eyes, when your mind stirs into awareness on a soft, warm bed

#answered; #archaictold

[fullsunstrawberry]

okay so part two!

so kao (boyfriend nickname) came back a few days ago… it was a whole mess but it was perfect after

so one - traffic was a bitch that day

two- kao loves to not respond to my texts sometimes

three- i got a call from my mom asking to pick her up (she lives in new jersey… i live in nyc… so you see the predicament i have)

anyway- so i’m in traffic hanging up my call from my mom and already in a bad mood, so when kao never responds to me when i ask where he is… yeah you can imagine how pissed i got (i’m super over dramatic!!)

so i pull up to the main entrance for kala terminal or whatever and i park the car and pay and shit and i literally can’t find him ANYWHERE

i’m calling, texting, and tracking on life360 but it’s not working (his phone is like lowkey broken so his location was still in japan) so i’m close to tears because when i’m pissed/stressed/happy/or any emotion i start crying (i’m working on it… it’s just my hormones) and i look up and THERE THAT LITTLE STINKER IS

so i run up to him and he almost falls and we hug for like 15 mins (okay prob not but you undertand) and then we leave and spend the night togyher and whatever

i wake up the next day and realize i never picked up my mother 😭 she was super pissed but i told her kao is back and she was like “ohhhh” and forgot about it

ANYWAY HAG oldest brother dmed kao and apologized but still hasn’t apologized to me so kao won’t accept it sooo the drama continues

sometimes i hate big families but then i love them bc my fam >>>

also math has always came to me but econ is so hard recently i don’t know why i feel like dropping out tho because i seriously cant do this tbhh

also business majors are awesome so don’t be hard on yourself!! you’ll figure out something that’ll work eventually:) life always works in the end

also good luck on the exams i know you’ll do so awesomeeee :)

(now that my uni is over except a lot more of these) (but if you ever want me to stop pls tell me i will enger be offended or anything)

bye love!!! 🩷🩷

you gotta put a tracker on him…like one of those spy ones

also DID YOUR MOM EVER GET THERE???

DAMN TEN YEARS!! me and my brothers age gap is 3 years

algebra 1 was my favorite but it went all down hill after

if you had to switch econ with something else… what would you? econ and math just sounds really smart ((also just took an econ test and i think i failed 💀))

at first i wanted to be an accountant but i’m thinking about marketing idkkk i took a bunch of social media classes so i might go into social media marketing

can’t wait for more of these!! if i ever tell you to stop KILL ME cause it’s an alien taking my place 😤🫡

sorry if this is weirdly formatted because i wrote this throughout the day 🙏❤️

love yah <3

#my love <3 #ask answered #my favorite #ask away! #the picture is of me #everytime i read something you sent #erin-calling <3

[max1461]

hi! did you study linguistics and maths seperately? or as a sort of double major program thing? sounds like a perfect combination btw, what career/research options would it lend itself to? ✨

I did a double major. So it was one degree (i.e. I didn’t go to undergrad twice), but I completed the requirements for a math major and a linguistics major separately. It wasn’t a combined major, which also existed at my school, but not for math/ling. Actually, fun fact, my friend (the “friend who knows econ” that I sometimes mention) did a double major where one of the majors was a combined major, so he got his degree in “economics and math/comp-sci”. Which I always thought was pretty cool.

It was a really great combination IMO, I feel like I kind of... “get it” as a result of studying this particular combination of things in a way that many people do not “get it”. I think both math and linguistics are fields that a little experience with will save you from a lot of meta errors, a lot of fallacious ways of thinking become immediately obvious if you’ve studied one or the other field, so I feel like the combination of the two kind of... helped me avoid a wide swath of types of bad thinking. I think the trifecta for this would be math/linguistics/analytic philosophy, if you spent serious time learning about all those I feel like it would make you into, just, very not-bad thinker. Maybe I should read more analytic philosophy.

Anyway, as for career paths I don’t really know. I mean I’m in grad school for linguistics right now, which is... a career path. But probably becoming an academic is basically a bad idea unless you are crazy. I mean idk. But the job market is just miserable, and the things you’re expected to put up with early in your career seem miserable, it’s something that I’m quite worried about going forward. Right now I’ve just started my grad program though and everything is pretty nice, so I’ll have to report back with first hand experience once I reach the later stages. Other than that, I think I’d be pretty well positioned to do something related to natural language processing or other tech stuff if I could program. I can sort of program but I’m bad at it. I’m slowly working on getting better because it seems like a prerequisite for basically all industry jobs.

But tbh I don’t like programming very much, o think if I had to do it as my day job I would go insane. Probably if academia doesn’t work out I’ll look for something “mathy” in industry that’s not related to any of the stuff I’ve actually been studying. Idk.

#anon #math #linguistics

[mingi-bubu]

4. “How would that even work?”

Fictober22~ soulmate au, uni au, strangers to soulmates, mingi is mentioned a lot for a character who doesn’t actually speak in this, author plays fast and loose with electrical engineering and art, seunghun x reader, ~2.4k

Ever since you were a wee lamb, you've known about Words. You knew that They connected you to another person, or persons. According to your Ma, Words are the first thing that comes from the person you're Connected with when they meet you.

Your Ma told you how she found hers, suddenly appearing one day when she was starting uni. She traced over Them on the side of her neck, just barely hidden by her hair, with a faraway look on her face. 'As far as the crow flies' is what her Words are. She met your father in the courtyard by the dorms because he overheard her asking her friend how far they thought she could throw the Frisbee. And the rest was history.

Your Words didn't appear until you were nearly out of uni. One day your left hand was plain and unmarked, and you woke up the next with Words that said 'How would that even work?' running from the crook of your thumb to almost the tip of your index finger. You remember staring at Them for ages, marveling at how right it felt to see Them, how They didn't seem to feel any different from your own skin. They were a little faded compared to people who've met their Connected(s), but that's normal. Words don't darken until They're communicated by the right person.

It was weird how fate had matched with your bachelor's program—electrical engineering major with a minor in visual arts. You used the things you learned in major courses to help with projects in your minor courses. Of course, this caused a lot of people to ask, “How could that work at all?” or “Why do you think that would even work?”

Questions that were so similar to your Words, but just a bit off. You're happy you made friends with people who understand your ideas, though. Yonghee, an engineering mathematics major whom you met in your freshman year, was someone who encouraged you to try anything you came up with. Mingi, an econ major a year ahead of you who studied how math and the fashion industry intersect, was someone you relied on for inspiration for your visual arts minor. You often asked him about current trends to see how you could incorporate that into your robots' designs. You have a few other close friends—Jenny who was a year below you and studying data science; Belle who was undecided but seemed to be leaning towards math education—but Yonghee was your closest friend.

Which is why you called him at six in the morning because you finally had inspiration on your next art project and told him to meet you at the art studio in an hour and bring black tea with a smidgen of honey.

"And I'm doing this for you on a Saturday, why?" He asks, his words coming out muffled. You figured he had his head half buried in his pillows as usual. "Mmm, because you're my best friend whom I love and cherish?" Your voice is sugar-sweet as you set your phone down on your bedside table and put the call on speaker. When he doesn't respond, you call his name to see if he was awake still.

"No, I'm awake," he says, and you hear the sheets rustle as he turns over, "I'm just waiting on a better reason." His voice is still sleepy, but the words come out much more clearly.

You roll your eyes and start sifting through your dresser for your art clothes; clothes that you wouldn't mind getting paints, oil pastels, charcoal, etc. on. "Okay, how about I buy us lunch when you force me to stop working because you're hungry?"

"I choose where we eat?"

"Yes, Yong, you can choose where we eat." You throw on your paint-stained jeans and an old T-shirt from your high school days. It has a purposefully faded image of a dragon being slain by a knight. It used to have words underneath that read something like 'A Knight to remember!' and the date of the big game between your school and your rivals. You turn to your desk and open your Little Box of Toys, as Mingi calls it, and start checking to see what you want to bring with you for the beginning stages of the project.

"I'll see you at seven. You going to your regular studio?"  He checks, yawning afterwards. You hum an affirmative, and he says, "Cool. See you soon."

The phone beeps to let you know he ended the call, and you walk back to your bedside table to grab it. As soon as you pick it up, your phone begins to vibrate, your ringtone playing. Yonghee's face appears in the little contact circle.

You're a little confused, but you answer it. "Yeah, Yong?"

"Forgot to tell you something," he says. He sounds completely awake now, and you take a guess at what he forgot.

"Aww, you forgot to say you love me," you simper, batting your lashes even though he can't see.

"Sure," he dismisses, "but also that a friend from high school is visiting from out-of-town, and he might be coming with me to the studio."

"I'm not buying him lunch," you immediately say, "if we're going where I think you'll want to go, I'm barely going to have enough to cover the both of us."

"It'll be fine. He might choose to sleep in, instead." The unspoken "like I was going to" hangs in the air.  "Either way, Mingi is going to whisk him away in the early afternoon."

"Gi knows him? You guys didn't go to high school anywhere near each other, though."

"They both did dance competitions back then. Min just didn't choose to major in it, unlike Seunghun."

"Oh, neat!" You say. "Well, he is certainly welcome to come with you. Mingi, too, if he wanted to get up this early."

There's a moment of silence before the two of you laugh. "Okay, okay, I'll see you soon!"

Once again, your phone beeps to let you know that the call is over. You set your phone on your desk next to your Little Box of Toys and go into the bathroom to brush your teeth and finish the rest of your morning routine. When you come back, you see that Yonghee texted you to remind you to bring a heavier jacket because it's supposed to be cold out today.

You smile, touched at your friend's thoughtfulness. You open the message to thank him, but before you can type the words, he sends another message explaining that he didn't want to deal with you being all whiny when you got sick.

Refusing to dignify it with a response, you shove the phone into your jacket pocket. You grab the rest of your things, put your shoes on, and check that you have the keys to get you into the studio. With that all done, you leave for the studio, locking your door behind you and pocketing the keys.

You get there before Yonghee, of course. The route to the building has been ingrained in your mind since the second half of freshman year. You're polite about it, though, and wait just on the other side of the entry doors. Yonghee was right; it was cold out today. While you waited for him, only twenty more minutes before he was late, and he had to pay for lunch as forfeit, you looked around at the entryway. Your eyes fell on the bulletin board filled with posters advertising everything from a reward for a lost hedgehog to baking lessons for French pastries.

There was something about the arts building in the early morning when nobody was around that gave you a sense of where you stand in the eyes of the universe. Sure, you have Words, you have fate that Connects you to another. But the universe doesn't care about that, or rather, Words are not the only thing that exists to the universe. You can tell by how the weak light of morning starts to fully come out from behind the clouds. The beams of light fall through the window and dust motes dance in it. The leaves outside that had dark outlines around them on the sidewalk from the rain the night before that hadn't yet evaporated. The birds starting to chirp and bounce from branch to branch, tree to tree. The universe had its own rhythm and beat, and it didn't care what you did or who you were.  It was both comforting and terrifying at the same time.

The idea of Connecting did the same.  Words were, in a way, Themselves Connecting you to the universe.  You’ve heard different reports on what happens when one’s Words darken.  Some people say they feel like the wind has been knocked out of them.  Others say they feel like something in their life had clicked into place.  Your Ma told you that for her, she felt like someone had put her inside a meat locker.  She said your father felt like he was sitting right next to a bonfire.

You were broken from your thoughts by the door opening, the cold air whooshing in along with Yonghee and another person who you assume is Seunghun. Yonghee held your tea in one hand, his drink in another.  The edges of a bright orangey-pink paper bag from the café by his apartment sticks out of his pocket. Seunghun was eating a breakfast sandwich, his cheeks and nose pink from the cold. You waved them further in, grabbing the door behind them and pulling it shut faster than it would have on its own.

Yonghee was bundled in a sweater with a scarf and his windbreaker over it.  A beanie with a pink and gray poof on top, matching the scarf, sat on his head.  His darker pink hair stuck out from it in several places.  Seunghun was wearing a dark gray beanie and a navy blue peacoat.  Despite it being obvious he was still tired, he was handsome.  You could tell from the way he carried himself that he is a dancer, and that he seems like someone who wants to and likes to laugh a lot.  Both of them wore their backpacks.

Yonghee hands you your tea. "So, tell me about your project."

You excitedly start talking about your project, leading the two down the hall to your favorite studio in the back, a corner room. You like the amount of natural light that you get there.  It’s also usually ignored in favor of the other studios because of its size, so you didn’t really have to worry about someone walking in and disturbing you.

"Okay, so I read about this story that someone told about their college professor who used Tesla coils to show how electricity is conducted in plexiglass. I want to do something similar to that, but with a different spin to it."  You explain as you open the door to the studio, setting your Little Box of Toys on the design desk. You gesture to the chairs, "Go ahead and take a seat wherever. Today I'm just getting the rough idea of it down, the blueprint if you will, and maybe starting on some smaller Tesla coils."

The two guys do as you say, sliding their backpacks off, dropping them to the ground, and Yonghee pulls out the paper bag from his pocket.  He takes his own sandwich out of it and starts eating.  Seunghun looks at you politely, watching as you talk with your hands about the project.

"I want to do something similar, but with paper if possible. If not, I'll use plexiglass and inks.  I’m probably going to experiment with sizes of the coils first to see which one is most doable in this context." You take a sip of your tea and set it down, exchanging it for a little robotic joint from your box, just to have something to fiddle with in the meantime. Yonghee nods along, understanding the basic idea of your project.

Seunghun raises a hand, and when you look at him, he asks hesitantly, "How would that even work?"

You nearly snap the joint in half at hearing him say your Words, and you look down at your finger. It felt like it was burning and cooling all at once, Words darkening as if They were rising like a tide. Staring at Them, you reflexively reply, "Wouldn't you like to know, weather boy?"

As soon as those words come out of your mouth, Seunghun's eyes widen. Thinking he is upset with you, you start apologizing. "I am so sorry, I have no idea where that came from! It's just something I do to Yonghee all the time."

“Thanks,” said boy mutters, taking a sip of his drink.

Seunghun breaks into a smile, his left hand coming up to rest on his right shoulder, fingers tightening around the dark wool.  "Still don't have a clue about how you'll control the electricity, but I'm glad to know that the person with my Words is so ambitious."

You can't help but smile back, a warmth spreading from your chest to the rest of your body.  You feel a little giddy, a little like you can’t really focus on reality.  "Well, I mean, I'll have a Faraday cage around some of my stuff. My electronic devices—phone, tablet, etcetera—will be protected from the electricity, but no, I won't have any control."

He looks a little worried at your explanation, but Yonghee reassures him.  “YN is used to working with this kind of thing.  Believe me, they’ll be fine.”

A thought strikes you, but hesitation rises with it.  Deciding that there’s no harm in asking, you say, “If you wanted, if you’re able to of course,” the words stumble out of your mouth, “you could, um, sit with me and watch when I get to that part of my project?”

“Yeah…” he says slowly, “yeah, that would be nice.”  He ducks his head down briefly, and you can see that he’s trying to hide another smile.  As a result, you do the same, looking down at your shoes, trying to hide your pleased smile.

Yonghee looks at the both of you, and sighs dramatically while he picks up his backpack, walking towards the small set of tables clustered in the opposite corner of the room.  “I’m going to die from sweetness overload if I look at the two of you any longer.”

#fictober22 #cix scenarios #seunghun scenarios #kim seunghun scenarios #sorry about my mingi bias LEAPING out in this #jae.works

[realtalk-princeton]

Incoming frosh here. Not sure what I want to major in, but math, econ, and possibly ORFE. I liked HS math a lot, but don't even want to try placing out of MAT 103-104 because it was virtual and I wouldn't be confident going into higher level math courses with what I feel is a weak foundation. What would my schedule look like after that if I wanted to pursue math? I think (??) I'd have to do 215-217 as a soph, and then all eight department reqs in 2 years, which seems kind of terrible??

Latios:

yeah… the ”215-17 soph year, then 8 departmentals in 2 years + junior IW + thesis” would be pretty terrible. (almost as if the course progression in the math department is very unwelcoming towards those without a lot of prior background.) if you want to major in math, one option to avoid this is to take whichever 10X/20X math class would be most comfortable for you freshman fall, while aiming to take 217 freshman spring. this might sound kind of scary, and it would definitely be A LOT of work and time. however, 217 does not actually require 215 as a prerequisite (linear algebra and intro real analysis are independent). i believe 217 follows Axler’s book (which is very readable with minimal background) pretty closely, so maybe you could read the first bit of that beforehand (or even now!) you could also go for 204 (which isn’t full on proof-based like 217 but covers more of the theory than 202, i think) freshman spring. one relevant fact is that not all the departmentals strictly need you to have taken 215-17 (even if it might say that on the course catalog, you could probably just take the class): combinatorics, intro graph theory, topology come to mind. if you don’t feel comfortable taking 217 as a freshman, you could go for 215-17 + two departmentals (one each semester) soph year. and taking 215 soph fall would open up lots of analysis options for a soph spring departmental in addition to 217. but if this sounds worse than 217 as a freshman, i’d point you to doing 217 freshman spring. like you said, you *really* don’t want to be doing 2 departmentals every semester on top of independent work in junior and senior years.

also: how familiar are you with what a proof is/how to prove something? because it is a TERRIBLE idea to take 215 or 217 without knowing what it means to write a mathematical proof. if you aren’t familiar with proofs, any math you’d learn in any math class here with number at least 214 will feel very different than the math you’ve learned, which can be a difficult/confusing change in mindset. as for what you should do now: maybe look at an intro analysis/linear algebra book, some ones people like are Axler, Treil (linear algebra), Rudin, Spivak, Pugh (analysis)? a book like the ones mentioned would prepare you well for the content covered in 215/17, along with introducing you to theoretical math in general if you aren’t yet comfortable with proofs. (BUT! imo the best way to start learning theoretical math is through ”problem solving” like material; see stuff like AoPS resources, Zeitz’s Art and Craft, The Book (more difficult). these things are also a lot of fun!)

good luck OP, hope this is helpful! feel free to ask any questions about math here anytime if you have any.

[b4nanaa]

FINDING WHAT I WANT TO DO

I help many people with this problem. The first thought you have to get clear is that a career is not just to do what you like, but also to do that same thing in times you don't like it. read: responsibility. So if you don't like it at a certain times, you might as well do something that you know you can.

So the clearest indication to start this off is to check your grades. What are you better and what are you worse at. Since you don't particularly like anything, it means all your grades are essentially what you are good or bad at aka talent. Also it might be a simple sign of what you like as well (because people do better at things they like more).

Biology: C (I suffered very greatly in it, so definitely NOT science since it bored me out of my mind in my opinion)

ENGLWRIT: A (It was an easy intro class though, and personally I'm not super into writing)

History 117: A (Chinese History, I did NOT enjoy it but I put all my sweat and tears into it)

History 151: B (It was super easy and I also didn't care for it)

CURRENTLY:

Econ: (No grade yet but I struggled with getting into it, I am getting more interested in it now but I'm not passionate yet?)

Spiritual: (I think it's okay and more of a relaxing class)

Math: (I'm doing alright in it and I like doing it)

Writing Society: (I hate it and I think it's dumb.)

If you still have no idea on what you are better at or like, then go the reversed way. What do you dislike? Don't go micro on this. There are four major things you can study. Business (includes finance/accounting/economics), Medical, Literary (law, journalism, etc.) and the rest. Tick off the stuff you don't like and work on it from there. You don't like medical, remove that from your likes. And just keep filtering it down until you've got something you can work with.

I don't like science at all. I never got into it and I still to this day have no idea what's going on in it

History feels like it can either be interesting or boring, but genuinely does not strike my as something I want to do anything with. I don't see the point in it (though I understand it's importance)

English I'm okay with but not super into? I don't see the importance of it besides it being fun and relaxing. I don't know if I care enough to write things all the time, it doesn't seem profitable nor boring or interesting. It just seems, fine.

Math is fun until you get confused and don't understand anything about it

Secondly, pay attention to the things you don't mind doing. Since you said you don't have a particular interest in anything, just reverse-psychology it. Again, the idea is that there's a reason too why you don't mind doing certain things. Write it all down. Every day, keep note of what your personality is like. What are your best and worst traits. Who are you as a person. How do you react to things and why do you react to things. If you can keep it in mind, do so. If not, again, write it down. You don't need to have a list immediately, but try to work towards it.

The start of anyone's career is by knowing yourself. And you can only know by exploring. Doesn't mean you have to immediately go study, or to work, but truthfully, by doing something, you get to understand yourself more, thus bringing me back to the point earlier made: Know thyself.

If this is something you feel trouble enough to care about, then try to do something about it. If you feel that you cannot do it alone, find a friend to do it with you or your family. If you still cannot, come and find me. We can do this together.

[boxofdicks]

the only privilege i ever assume people have inherently is when i talk to other usamerican uni students when i was in undergrad in the states, cause when theyre stressed about assignments im always like why dont you just. take some adderall and pull an all nighter about this. why not just have 4 red bulls and an adderall and some cigarettes and submit the damn assignment. cause are you about to tell me you dont have access to this? seriously? you do. text your freshman year roommate and ask her. just spend your beer money for the week on this. live in the lib for a week. ive had diagnosed and prescribed adhd since i was 11 so i have to take these pills a few times a week to simply do my readings but they are so available to you people. and so i assume everyone has this privilege and if they dont then im like well i simply cannot aid you in your pursuits. not only can i conceive of an academic situation in which red bull and an adderall would not help but i dont know how youve gotten this far without at least the red bull part. i can recommend using the tool mybib for citations. google scholar and jstor and the writing center and emailing your professor asking for an extension bc ive never been turned down for one less than 48 hours. and adderall. when im a professor and i have office hours i will have to remedy this approach.

do you think people rawdog law school? med school? do you think theres a single biology or engineering or mandarin or comp sci or religious studies student who made honors without adderall. one time my buddy in seminary school got his hands on some cocaine and spent 4 days trading futures online before etrade found out he wasnt licensed to do so and he got banned. he made eight thousand dollars off of four hundred. and what did he do next? took a few days off to sleep, then passed his midterms. then he hit a deer with his truck and had to shoot it to put it out of its misery, so he took it to the local farm butcher and got years worth of venison. we make chili out of the sausage he gave my parents to thank us for hosting thanksgiving. the moral of this story? sometimes the grindset can pay off in mysterious ways. the power of stimulants is within you. you have the power to take control of this night and make it an all nighter and succeed. business majors abuse these. they use them without honor. they dont read textbooks or write essays or do math or whatever engineers do. they dont even trade rich peoples portfolios. they may network at best. at best. they party and then preach the grindset and sales. these people have rarely grinded. only when they took econ classes and had to learn stats did they grind. my friends. the grindset is within you. you can make thousands legally but not within the terms of service. you can finish the essay and pass. this isnt about adderall. its about grit. and red bull

#this is about my lil baby sophomore i adopted who texts me asking for help and im like sweetheart im in scotland i can look over your paper #but you have to write it first #oooh i waited too long i dont have time #well i have a solution for you #if not adderball than there is a product on the market today #bang energy #and marlboro golds #the ivory tower is built of cocaine cigarettes and lil blue pills #i was pulling hundred hour weeks in the lib in undergrad working on my thesis and honors thesis #and now in grad school i realize #you get more done on the rare all nighters than on the 4 a week #work steady and dont overwork for weeks and then you can do like a big one every five days at the end of the semester #it works better! it keeps your mind ok

[bigfatkisses]

I once ended up at a dinner with a bunch of business and economics majors from all over the world. Conversation flowed, as it does in a group of optimistic grad students, about world politics and economies.

At some point, a person from Venezuela went on to say "I don't care if the next leader in my country is genocidal, I only wish them to be economically efficient." He said it semi-seriously, and I politely giggled, even though it wasn't a great joke in my opinion. But what did I know, I'm a math major, maybe I just don't "get" econ jokes. Nobody reacted too much and life moved on.

As I look at the news of the Israeli war, and the support by the western world, I realise that wasn't as much of a joke as I thought. People, whole countries, think that this would be better. Life moving on as "normal" for the economy, even if meant a some people dying, some children killed, some cultures erased.

"For the Greater Good", though for whose greatness and whose good, we don't know.

#war #economy #serious post #I don't know what to do about any of this #I want to change the world #but I'm just a little girl

[vanilla-voyeur]

Kinda annoyed with the assumption that all socialists are just economically illiterate dumdums who would realize the error of their ways if they'd just take an Econ 101 class. Well I have taken introductory econ classes. I've taken multiple econ classes. The university I went to has one of the top 10 economics programs in the US. I originally went into college wanting to be an econ major before I switched to CS. I got to the point of taking one upper division class right before we started getting into the calculus.

The problem with how economics is taught in school is that it takes an approach of capitalist realism that taints their interpretation of everything. Everything that supports the ends of capitalism is assumed to be good. Everything that doesn't maximize efficiency is assumed to be bad. Anyone who advocates for something that has been shown not to maximize efficiency is a big dumdum who doesn't understand economics. There is no question or discussion about whether maximizing efficiency is something we always want in every case.

We got taught that price floors and price ceilings and taxes and regulations cause deadweight loss. Deadweight loss is bad for maximizing efficiency. All those politicians who want rent control and minimum wage and increasing taxes on the 1% are big dumdums who don't understand basic economics. Are there any trade-offs where it's worth it to increase deadweight loss for some other benefit? Not considered.

I do remember getting taught that monopolies are bad. Monopolies also cause deadweight loss. Notably, it is incredibly hard to be a billionaire without being the CEO of a monopoly. Billionaires are causing deadweight loss. Any politician who's against trust busting is an economically illiterate dumdum. If you don't have a problem with billionaires then you hate the basic principles of capitalist competition. (Or alternatively you're an economically illiterate dumdum.)

There are many forms of economic efficiency, but the only one I was taught in school was Pareto efficiency. None of my professors mentioned any other variant. Pareto efficiency was treated as a law of the universe. It's just a theory by some guy. He made some pretty math equations that work under idealized conditions. What if he's wrong? What about all the other models that think he's wrong? What if he's right but he didn't consider things like institutions of oppression? (19th century white Parisian nobility are well known for taking into account how racism, sexism, classism, etc affect society.)

I think the order of classes is suspicious too. First you get simplified microeconomics then simplified macroeconomics then increase the math of each while still being simplified, all before talking about where real life capitalist countries are failing at approaching the idealized model. By that time, the capitalist realism has already set in. We should get to the differences between the graphs and the reality by the third class bare minimum. Perfect competition isn't possible. It's a utopia. Does that actually mean that we should be trying to get closer to it? What sort of trade-offs should we consider when we're departing from perfect competition? We never discussed it.

To the extent of my knowledge, my university never had a class on idealized socialism or communism or any other economic model but focuses entirely on idealized capitalism until upper division classes. The only classes that acknowledge socialism exists compares existing capitalist countries to existing socialist countries. By then, you've already drank the Kool aid of how capitalism could be at its best and it turns out theoretical capitalism is more attractive than existing totalitarian dictatorships. What would a socialist democracy look like? They never bother to ask.

You can't compare and contrast something you don't know anything about. It's all capitalist realism. Anyone who hasn't taken a Socialist Economics 101 class where they draw the simplified graphs and they explain the concepts is an economically illiterate dumdum too.

#Capitalist economics #Socialism #Communism #Capitalist realism #Anti capitalism #That said. many US American “socialists” are economically illiterate dumdums #Yall are swimming so deep in capitalist realism soup you dont realize that your “anti-capitalism” is just capitalist reform #If you think Norway is a socialist country then you know nothing about socialism and nothing about Norway #“They have universal healthcare” Bruh everyone has universal healthcare