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lavendercharm · 2 months

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Linger, Chapter 5: Kiss With A Fist/Human Nature

A/N:

Ya'll. Writing this chapter felt like a marathon. But I think I'm ultimately very happy with it. Please let me know what you think!

This chapter is a bit longer, and I think it deserved to be named after two songs because of that. "Kiss With A Fist" by Florence + The Machine definitely fits the first half of this chapter and was one of the first songs I added to my playlist when writing this story, so I knew I wanted to use it for the big public confrontation.

The vibes toward the end are different. I discovered this song earlier this week and haven't been able to stop listening to it, so maybe I'm just reaching to try and justify including it lol. But "Human Nature" by Barrie is what I decided to use for the second half of this. Cause they're spitting facts when they say "Human nature doesn't always come easy" lmfao.

This is far from the end of this story, but it may be a second before you hear from me, depending on how busy the next few weeks are. I say that - watch me turn around and post something this weekend lol.

Thank you to everyone who's stuck with me thus far. I love you and I'm so grateful to know you're along for the ride.

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Summary: From the moment you meet her, you can't stand Melissa Schemmenti.

Warnings: Strong Language

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Barbara Howard did not take days off. It was only recently that she allowed herself her first mental health day, and while she could see the benefits, she had been eager to get back to her classroom, her students, her best friend, and even her coworkers. The life of a teacher was unpredictable, and the life of a teacher at Abbott Elementary came with its own unique set of challenges, but Barbara had seen a lot in her decades of teaching. With some hard work, support from her fellow teachers, and the grace of God himself, she had seen and survived it all. Barbara Howard could conquer anything thrown her way.

However, if Barbara had the magical gift of foresight, she might have chosen Monday morning to take her second mental health day in her entire history at Abbott.

As it was, Barbara could not see into the future, and so she entered the teacher’s lounge at 6:30 AM, on the dot. She claimed her usual spot, made herself a cup of coffee, and began sorting through her lesson plans for the week. She enjoyed her few moments of serenity in the lounge prior to the arrival of her more talkative coworkers. It wasn’t unusual for Melissa to arrive a bit later, especially on a Monday, so Barbara thought nothing of her absence. She politely greeted Janine and Jacob as they entered together; she did the same for Gregory shortly after. As the three younger teachers gathered at their table and discussed their weekends, Barbara continued her work, occasionally reacting to what she overheard. And when you entered the lounge, your first time visiting in the morning, Barbara was mildly surprised, but she shot you a warm smile all the same. She noticed you seemed to be a bit tense, but she chalked it up to the fact that you were still very new.

Melissa had talked her ear off about you last Monday, of course, explaining your tardiness and the shots you’d taken at her about her age. When Barb pressed her for details about your confrontation and what you’d said to each other, she simply said, “I took care of business, a’right?”

While Barbara agreed it was unprofessional of you to arrive late, she also knew Melissa better than anyone else in Abbott did; she knew Melissa could take things too far. Melissa was as passionate as they came, which meant she was one of the best teachers at the school. On the flip side, she also had a short fuse. Barbara knew she didn’t have all of the details, but she didn’t think much of it - you were a sub, after all. She expected she’d never actually meet you.

So when you arrived in the lounge for lunch the day after your explosive argument, she was shocked. While skeptical of you, she couldn’t help but admire your tenacity. You’d come face to face with the wrath of Melissa Schemmenti and still returned to Abbott. You’d introduced yourself, and as far as Barbara could tell, you were perfectly polite and well mannered. The displeasure and hostility radiating off of Melissa was felt by everyone in the lounge, but aside from giving her close friend a pointed look, Barbara chose to ignore it.

You’d continued showing up the rest of the week, greeting Barbara every day before taking a seat with Janine and Jacob, as well as Gregory, occasionally. The younger teachers seemed to have taken an instant liking to you, the four of you sharing stories from previous schools or discussing the latest movie releases. You’d even had a good-natured exchange with Ava one morning. The principal had leant against the corner with her phone and talked you through her “roster”, whatever that meant. Barbara was sure she didn’t want to know.

Barbara observed how seamlessly you integrated into Abbott’s social circles - with the obvious exception of the red head who always sat to her right in the lounge. Melissa pretended you didn't exist, which would have been fine if it wasn’t the elephant in the room. Your first day in the lounge, Janine had tried to talk to Melissa about you. She’d turned to Melissa with a huge grin on her face and said, “Man, Melissa, you’re so lucky to have such an awesome sub as your aide.”

Melissa had glanced at Janine over the rim of her cat-eye glasses, and in a sharp tone, retorted, “What sub?” That’s all it took for everyone in the room to grasp her unspoken message: If you value your life, drop it. The only reaction Barbara saw was a sharp flash of your eyes before you turned your back to the older woman and called Janine over, changing the subject.

But last Friday, Melissa caught up with Barbara after the school day ended and explained that you’d just given her two VIP tickets to the Eagles game on Sunday. If there was anything that would help Melissa forgive your transgressions, it was that. Once again, Barbara found herself impressed with you - you took the initiative to make amends and you’d knocked it out of the park. She was happy for her friend. She’d told Melissa, “Just think of how much you’ll be able to accomplish now that you and that young woman can work together. Now, you and Gary go enjoy that ball game.”

A week after your first morning at Abbott, all of the water was seemingly under the bridge, and the staff room could breathe easy again. No one paid much mind to the anxiety radiating off of you. For the most part, the energy in the room was calming as the day began.

The sudden CRACK of the door slamming into the shelves violently ripped the room’s occupants out of their morning zen. It was enough to cause everyone to nearly jump out of their skin. Heads whipped in the direction of the doorway as Melissa’s furious form charged into the lounge. Her attention was initially on Barb, but as she opened her mouth to speak, her eyes locked on you. The blush of fury rose instantly in her cheeks. She ripped her bag off of her shoulder and tossed it in the direction of her regular table, nearly hitting Barbara in the process, and as her eyes narrowed, you could practically see the steam rolling off of her as she hissed out, “You.”

And that’s when Barbara knew any chance of a peaceful morning had gone out the window.

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As your weekend began, it didn’t take long for it to sink in that you were well and truly fucked. You completely failed to consider the consequences of your little scheme. There’s no way in hell Melissa wouldn’t be out for blood at the start of the next school week. The smartest thing to do would be to never return to Abbott, move to a new city across the country, and change your legal name. You went back and forth between chastising yourself for being ridiculous, and being so ridden with anxiety that you couldn’t eat. You felt so stupid - what did you think would happen?

Ultimately, you reached a point where you couldn’t handle the crushing weight of what you’d done alone, so you’d spilled to Ava. Her response had been about the least reassuring thing she could have said.

You did WHAT? I didn’t know you were crazy like that! You’re gonna die girl. I’m not even joking. We gotta go out this weekend, cause it’s your last one alive. I’ll make sure you have fun tho. Do you own any latex?

After refusing Ava’s offers to make your last days on earth worthwhile, you spent most of the weekend drowning in anxiety and imagining how Melissa would bring about your demise. You decided you had to do your best to prepare. You literally couldn’t afford to not go back to Abbott, especially after getting your headlights repaired Saturday afternoon. Under the anxiety, you could feel the ember of your rage, still pulsing with a red-hot glow, so you decided to grasp ahold of it. What you’d done was shitty, sure. But compared to smashing headlights? All you’d done was get even.

Seeing as you couldn’t afford to uproot your whole life and leave Philadelphia, the next most logical thing to do was to never be caught alone in a room with Melissa ever again. You were pretty sure this was something you could pull off - you figured you had two weeks left at Abbott tops, and as long as you had kids or other teachers in the same room, you would have witnesses who could recount your violent death should Melissa murder you.

This is what caused you to arrive at Abbott on Monday morning a full hour and a half before you needed to be there. You’d dithered in your car for about fifteen minutes, debating driving away and then talking yourself out of it. Eventually, you braved the outdoors, darting into the building and down the hallways as quickly as you could. You practically sprinted past Melissa’s classroom door - the lights were out, but even though you logically knew she wasn’t in yet, your mind conjured a vivid image of her jumping out of the shadows like a monster in waiting. You slowed down and tried to control your breathing as you entered the teacher’s lounge, and you were immediately soothed to see how many people were already there. Even better, Melissa was absent.

As you passed Barbara, you gave her a hesitant smile. You actually liked Barbara, as much as you can like someone who’s polite and whom you don’t know very well. You figured it may be the last chance you get - surely the woman would turn against you once Melissa told her what you’d done. Janine, Jacob, and Gregory were all sitting at your usual table, and after preparing your morning coffee, you quickly situated yourself in a seat, thankfully facing the door to the lounge.

“Hey!” Janine said, shooting you her adorable, slightly gapped-toothed smile. “How was your weekend?”

“Oh, uh… it was fine,” you said, your eyes darting toward the door as it opened. Not Melissa . “Mostly caught up on chores… had to get some work done to my car, fun stuff like that.”

“Car problems are tough,” Gregory said, spooning a bite out of his bowl of plain oatmeal. “What was wrong with it?”

“Uh…” you hesitated, unsure if you wanted to share what was really wrong. It would inevitably lead to questions and the last thing you wanted was for everyone to know the details of your feud. It was one thing for everyone to know Melissa didn’t like you - there were very few people Melissa actually liked in general. But it was another entirely for them to know she’d smashed out your headlights. Something generic - a bad alternator, maybe - would suffice.

You didn’t even get the chance to lie.

Despite the fact that you could see the doorway, the resounding SMACK of the door slamming open still made you jump. Before your brain knew what it was processing, in stormed Melissa Schemmenti, thick heels clacking on the linoleum tiles. She wore a form fitting pink sweater, the neckline questionably appropriate, and skin tight black pants. Her saint necklaces shimmered from their home on her collarbones. You supposed she wanted to look hot when she killed you.

It only took a moment for her eyes to lock on you, and in that moment you knew things were about to get ugly. To your surprise, seeing the flustered state she was in created a feeling of immense satisfaction. She was furious because your plan had worked. You didn’t even fight the smile that began to find its way onto your lips. The anxiety wasn’t gone, but you relished in the triumphant feeling of landing a critical hit.

“ You,” she hisses, tossing her bag from her shoulder. The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife.

Your eyebrows shoot up, feigned ignorance in your voice as you point at yourself and respond, “Who, me?”

She starts toward you, and everyone else at your table scatters. You’re shocked to see Janine step in front of you, her hands up placatingly. “Melissa-”

“Shut it, pipsqueak, and get out of my way ,” she growls, her gaze over Janine’s head burning holes in you.

“Hey!” You spit out, anger spiking and crowding out your anxiety. You’re suddenly standing. “Don’t call her that!”

Janine turns to you, holding a hand in your direction now too. “It’s fine, she calls me that all the time-”

“It’s not fine!” You shout, fists balled. Your eyes are glued to Melissa’s. “You think you can say and do whatever you want because no one will stand up to you. Well, I’m not going to put up with it!”

“Oh my god, please stop this. I will never psychologically recover from seeing your dead body,” Jacob pleads, wedged between the corner of the room and the fridge for cover.

“Can’t believe I was dumb enough to trust ya,” Melissa growls. “And after all that bullshit about ‘olive branches' and bein’ cordial.”

You smirk. “Oh, right! How was the game?”

Melissa starts forward again and Janine has to physically hold her back. She’s shockingly effective in spite of her small stature.

“Ya know I didn’t get into the game! Gary and I went all the way to the stadium, but you gave me fake tickets! We wasted our whole afternoon and got harassed by security!” she shouts.

“So what are you gonna do about it? Beat me up? Call the cops on me?” you challenge.

A deeply offended look crosses Melissa’s face as her jaw drops. “Are you callin’ me a snitch?” she snarls. She surges against Janine one more time, who manages to keep her back again. “That’s low, even for you!” Melissa says nastily over Janine’s shoulder.

“Oh, that’s low?” You ask incredulously. “Low like smashing someone’s headlights out?” There’s an audible gasp from Jacob in the corner, and you feel the heat of everyone’s gaze turn from you to Melissa, the whole room enthralled by your verbal tennis match.

Melissa glances around her before pointing an accusatory finger at you. “Ya can’t prove that was me!” You thought someone would have to have been born yesterday to believe that; anyone who worked at Abbott knew that’s exactly something Melissa would do.

“Oh yeah, because everyone else here keeps a bat taped under their desk like a neurotic asshole!” you proclaim, throwing your hands up in the air.

“I’ll show you ya stronza- ” Melissa hisses, pushing past Janine and beginning to reach for you. Your arms come up to instinctively protect your face, but before she can reach you, a figure closer to your height blocks your vision.

“THAT IS ENOUGH!” Barbara Howard bellows. The whole room comes to a standstill, frozen in time. Even Melissa has been stopped in her tracks, her eyes wide in shock as Barbara looks accusingly between the two of you. You feel immediately ashamed. “Are you both not grown adults? I cannot believe the absolute foolishness I’ve just witnessed!” She rounds on Melissa. “Especially from you!”

“Barb, she-” Melissa starts.

“I don’t care if she insulted your cooking to your face, you do not behave like catty teenagers! We are professional, grown people! Acting like this in front of your peers? Disgraceful! ”

She rounds on you, her eyes narrowing. “And you. To think that I was beginning to think highly of you. You went to all that trouble to make fake football tickets, just to get back at Melissa? Have you ever heard the phrase ‘An eye for an eye’ ?”

The pit of shame in your stomach is sickening as you slowly lower your arms, your eyes unable to meet Barbara’s. Feeling like a petulant child, you couldn’t help but mutter, “She started it.”

“And now I’m ending it!” Barbara yells. You feel her grip the sleeve of your sweater and pull. You stumble after, seeing her grasp Melissa as well. “You are both coming with me!” The rest of the lounge doesn’t move a muscle as Barbara Howard physically drags you into the hallway.

She marches with both of you in tow, Melissa sending you the nastiest glares she can muster from the other side of her friend. Stopping in front of a classroom full of bright colors and tiny chairs, Barbara turns to both of you. “This has gotten completely out of hand! You are both going to sit in my room and we are going to work through this. I don’t care if it takes all day - you will NOT be allowed out until you can act like civilized adults!” She folds her arms and gestures her head forward. You stare back for a moment, thinking she must be joking, but the woman doesn’t budge. After a moment longer, you enter the classroom. You’re followed closely by Melissa, who stalks to the other end of the room.

Barbara closes her door and pulls down the window blind. She turns to you both, her eyes closed and her shoulders rising in deep, even breaths. Eventually, she opens her eyes, and commands, “Take a seat.”

You glance around and only see chairs for children. You begin to protest, but the look on Barbara’s face prompts you to simply grab the nearest chair and plant yourself in it. Your knees are comically close to your chest and you don’t know where to put your hands. You settle on resting them on top of your knees. Melissa is pacing back and forth, muttering to herself - you guess she gets to ignore Barbara’s request.

“Now,” Barbara begins. “We are going to talk out your problems so we can put this whole mess behind us. Your students deserve you at your best, and you cannot be your best when you’re at each other’s throats!” She’s stern, chastising, and you feel ridiculous. “Where did all of this animosity start? Why are you angry with Melissa?”

You can’t help but scoff because the answer should be obvious. Barbara presses her lips together in annoyance and you quickly reply, “Well, where do I begin? Aside from smashing my headlights out, she’s done nothing but disrespect me since I stepped foot in her room. She was insulting me before she even learned my name!”

“I never learned your name,” she pipes up spitefully, and you whip your head around to glare at her.

“Memory not as good as it used to be?” you retort. A muscle in her jaw jumps out as she clenches her jaw, her face coloring once more.

Before she has a chance to rip into you again, Barbara cuts you both off with a stern, “Knock it off!” She looks exasperatedly between the two of you before pinching the bridge of her nose. “The Lord is testing me today,” she whispers to herself, shaking her head. She turns her attention to the fiery woman across the room. “Melissa?”

Melissa comes to a stop, planting herself and leaning her weight onto one hip. She rolls her eyes, gesticulating wildly as she speaks. “If we’re goin’ back to the start, then first things first, she strolled into my class thirty minutes late. Didn’t even have the decency to apologize.”

“You didn’t give me a chance to!” you protest. “I hadn't even stepped into the room before you were criticizing me. It’s not like I did it on purpose, it was a complete and total accident. And then you started insulting how young and inexperienced I look.”

“I was just givin’ you a hard time, that’s all,” she says indignantly. “How was I suppose ta know you can’t take a joke?”

Your head whips toward her. “And smashing my headlights? Was that a joke?” you retort incredulously.

Her eyes narrow and her tone is venomous as she hisses, “Nah, that was for throwin’ away my school supplies, stealin’ lunches, and callin’ me a bitch.”

You hear Barbara’s sharp inhale and jump to defend yourself. “Those supplies were all broken or unusable! You have so much on your hands with two classes and I was just trying to help you. Also, Janine gave me that lasagna because I forgot my lunch, I didn’t steal anything. You wouldn’t give me a chance to explain myself before jumping down my throat. Not to mention calling me degrading names in Italian!”

Barbara raises an eyebrow and gives Melissa a knowing glance. “Melissa uses gabbortz quite often, it’s nothing to get offended over,” she says, an attempt to reassure you.

Melissa’s eyes dart to Barbara’s as she huffs, “Uh, it’s gabbadost , Barb. And I mighta used somethin’ more… vulgar.” To your disbelief, the red head practically looks sheepish at this admission. Her arms cross in front of her as she shifts her weight, and your eyes are drawn to how the motion causes her cleavage to swell ever so slightly. Feeling heat flood your cheeks, you dart your eyes all over the room, attempting to find something else to fix them on. Luckily, neither woman seems to notice. Barbara’s eyebrows are furrowed in an inquisitive way that suggests she’s waiting for the shorter woman to elaborate. Melissa lets out a puff of air. “I mighta used the ‘P’ word, a’right?”

Barbara’s eyes widen as her mouth drops open in a gasp. “The ‘P’ word? Melissa Schemmenti, you don’t mean-”

“Yeah, yeah, the one I save exclusively for Kristin Marie. That ‘P’ word.” You don’t know who Kristin Marie is, but Barbara looks positively scandalized.

Tearing her eyes away from Melissa, Barbara stands and turns away from both of you, hands on her hips and head shaking in disapproval. As she takes her turn pacing across the room, the disappointed silence from the older woman allows the weight of the last week to settle on you, and you find yourself suddenly exhausted. You lean forward, your head in your hands and the shame rising inside of you like a tidal wave. How did you get here?

“Well, I think you both have been sufficiently horrible to each other,” Barbara says, turning toward you. “Now explain how this has all made you feel.”

You and Melissa groan in unison. “Come on, Barb,” Melissa starts, but Barbara holds up a single admonishing finger to silence her. The Italian woman becomes subdued immediately, and you notice how different Melissa’s reaction is to being silenced by Barbara.

“How has this made you feel?” the older woman presses, her tone of voice a warning to comply. Melissa leans against the wall, refusing to budge. You all sit in tense silence for what feels like an eternity, and you wish the floor would swallow you up. She was using the same tactics on you that you might use on two fighting eight year olds.

Eventually, you can’t handle the tension any longer and you burst out, “I feel totally disrespected!” You look to Barbara and she gestures for you to continue. “I uh… I feel belittled, and like you don’t take me seriously, but I think the worst part is I never got the chance to prove to you that I belong here… you wrote me off before you even met me. I’ve worked hard, and I love what I do, so to have you disregard me right off the bat, just because I made a mistake and I look young… it felt pretty shitty,” you admit, the confession coming out of you in one long rush.

“Especially because… I was excited to work with you,” you add quietly. You’re suddenly enamored with the floor, unable to bring yourself to look either woman in the eye. You feel exposed and vulnerable, and you’re majorly uncomfortable with it.

You’re forced to endure your feelings of discomfort for a few more torturous minutes. Suddenly, your eyes widen in shock as a husky voice meets your ears, and it takes a moment for your brain to process the words.

“I guess I feel a lot of the same,” Melissa admits. You raise your gaze to meet hers, and she’s staring at you intently, the earnestness reflected in her jewel-green eyes making your heart skip a beat. “Felt like you didn’t really care when you were late. Some a’ these kids? They got plenty of adults outside of these walls that don’t really care. That’s the last thing they need here. And then ya walked in and you look so young… I couldn't resist teasin' ya. But then you got me back and I got defensive, and I shouldnt’a.” She shifts her weight, casting her eyes to the floor. “I bought all those supplies with my own money,” she admits. “So seein’ you throwin’ em away, it really rubbed me the wrong way. But… you were right. I was tryin’ to stretch em when there was no more room to stretch. And then seein’ my lasagna on your desk… I know I can be a real hot head, and I took it out on ya and it wasn’t fair.”

As you look at Melissa, her red hair shining under the fluorescents and her evident unease at her own candor, there’s a swelling feeling in your chest and a warmth slowly spreading in your limbs. “Melissa,” you say, and her head snaps up to meet you. You search her eyes, waiting for her to snap at you for using her first name. She doesn’t. She simply waits, holding your gaze, and you can’t quite read what’s behind her eyes, but you suspect it’s something far softer than she’s shown you before.

You allow yourself to swim in those emerald pools for just a second longer before you admit, tenderly, “I’m sorry.” You see her shoulders drop ever so slightly, tension releasing as she allows your words to sink in. “I’m sorry for what I’ve said about your age. I’m sorry for throwing your things away without asking. And I’m really sorry about the Eagles tickets. That definitely wasn’t my finest moment.” You say the last bit with a touch of humor. You pause for a moment, before adding, “I’m not going to apologize for the lasagna, though. Janine insisted on giving it to me, and it was one of the most incredible things I’ve ever tasted.”

You see her eyes widen, her brows raising in surprise. A genuine satisfied smile graces her lips, and you can’t help but momentarily wish things had been different over the last week so you could have seen more of those. That smile made her entire demeanor change.

“Well,” she says, eyes flashing with her own humor. She shoots you a sly grin, and you return a small smile of your own. “If I’m bein’ real with ya, I’m impressed. Fake tickets? Pretty diabolical,” she continues, admiration in her voice. Her smile fades, though, and she brings her hand up, pressing a knuckle to her lips briefly in thought. She sighs, murmuring, “I’m sorry too. I shoulda given you a chance before jumpin’ to conclusions. And, uh… I’ll pay for ya to get your headlights fixed.” She mutters that last part, and you notice that she didn’t apologize for smashing them - but you know it’s as close as she’ll come, because you’re not sure she entirely regrets it. You’ll take what you can get.

“Thank you,” you murmur, and once again you suddenly can’t look at her anymore. Luckily, Barbara draws your focus to her as she clears her throat. You both look toward the older teacher as she stares down at you, a smug, triumphant smile dancing across her full lips.

“Now, was that so hard?” She asks, her voice teasing both of you. For the first time in days, you feel like you can breathe fully again. Melissa rolls her eyes, pulling herself away from the wall, but you detect a hint of relief radiating off of the woman as well.

“Don’t expect us to hold hands or nothin’ Barb,” she says as she heads for the door. When she reaches it, she pauses and turns to you. She considers you for a moment, and you begin to feel warm underneath her gaze. Finally, she says, “Well, ya comin’? We got lessons to plan for the day. How do ya feel about teaching Science?” Her tone is gruff, commanding, no nonsense. The carefully curated tough exterior of Melissa Schemmenti is back in place. But you’ve seen the slightest glimpse of the human being underneath.

“Right behind you,” you reply, and a tentative grin breaks out across your face as you stand and begin to follow the short woman. You pause briefly though, a thought entering your mind, and you turn to Barabra. Your hands grasp each other behind your back as you rock forward onto the balls of your feet, and you convey your gratitude by giving the older woman the warmest smile you can muster and uttering, “Thank you, Barbara.”

She returns your smile, her own radiant and warm, and you can’t help but feel like you’ve been blessed a bit. “My pleasure, dear. Go on, I’ll see you at lunch.” You nod in agreement, and turn on your heel, following after your lead teacher. You’re not friends - seeing as your time is limited at Abbott, you don’t imagine you ever will be. But you feel lighter, and there’s a newfound respect for the short woman. And for the first time since you stepped foot inside Abbott Elementary, you feel excited for the day before you.

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A/N:

Yes, I'm sorry, Gary will be briefly mentioned/perhaps even making small appearances. Stay strong lol. Controversial opinion but I don't hate Gary. Did I think he was good enough for Melissa? HELL NO. Do I think he should have respected her wishes and listened to her when she explained her boundaries? HELL YES. But ultimately he was just a big dumb guy who was infatuated with Melissa Schemmenti, and to that, I relate. Still, I wasn't mad about that split.

Fun fact - if you've watched season 3 episode 4 already, I wrote the Ava roster line before that episode aired. I died laughing when the kids were talking to Gregory about his roster. We don't need to talk about the firefighter exchange... denial is my favorite state.

#melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti #Spotify

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foundfamilyadoptionagency · 9 months

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Welcome + Rules

Welcome to the Tumblr Found Family Adoption Agency! Here, we present your blorbos to the masses to have them vote upon whether they should be added to the collective tumblr found family or ditched on the roadside. Submit your blorbos here:

See which blorbos have already joined the found family HERE! To avoid seeing the results posts, mute "ffaa results" The rules are: 1. Play nice; be respectful to others 2. Blorbos can be of any age, since a found family can be just that. So feel free to submit a one-day old infant or a ten thousand year old tree, if those are your blorbos 3. No Harry Potter 4. No real people (might make an exception if it's funny) 5. "No real people" includes no individual tumblr users, youtubers or streamers (this might seem obvious, but there were still a lot of them submitted) 6. No OCs. All your OCs are great and I'd feel sad if they got rejected from the found family F.A.Q. under readmore:

(No one has actually asked any questions, but these are the ones I'm anticipating) Some of these questions have been asked now lol Q. How does this work? A. A post featuring a blorbo shall be made, stating who they are and their source material. A poll will be attached set to one week, asking if we should "adopt" or "ditch" the blorbo. At the end of the week, based on the result, I will announce if they blorbo has been adopted into the tumblr found family or ditched on the roadside Q. What is a found family? A. A found family is a family you find for yourself. It is a term often used in fandom to describe a group of characters who aren't related by blood (although a few members might be) but have come to think of each other as a family through circumstance. Alternatively, they might not be officially recognised as a found family in canon, but wider fanon regards them as such Q. Is this a tournament bracket? A. Nope, blorbos aren't competing against each other, they're only here to be judged by you. We are here enternally submitting blorbos (at least until I run out of steam or pass away lol) Q. I'm not sure if my blorbo counts because of ___ reason? A. If it's not any of the reasons mentioned in the rules, then feel free to send an ask. Or just submit them anyway and I'll decide Q. I submitted a blorbo and they haven't been posted. Did you get them? A. Again, feel free to send an ask. I don't have a regular schedule for posting these. Somedays there'll be batches of polls, others there'll be one or none Q. My blorbos are a duo/trio/etc., who cannot be separated. Can I submit them as a group? A. While I would prefer to stick to individual characters, if you have some who absolutely cannot be separated, I might make exceptions. Most likely, I'll make a poll asking if they should be judged as a group or individually, since there's a lot of media I won't be familiar with Q. My blorbo got ditched on the roadside! Fuck you! A. Friend, as a fan of Theseus from Hades Game, I understand what it's like to have your fave hated by fandom. Anything decided on this blog can never affect your personal headcanons, so go in peace with your middle finger held high Q. What are your icon and header? A. The icon is of the Pokemon Bouffalant and Natu, based on a series of trading card art where Bouffalant finds two Natu and rescues them - the true spirit of found family. The header is a group of characters called the Black Ravens from the Professor Layton series - a group of ragtag working-class kids who make a black market together Q. I wrote some propaganda on the submission form, can you post it or send it back to me? A. Submissions are deleted as the polls are posted, so I can keep track of how many I have left to post, which means I can't do this. Please save your propaganda for the post and not the submissions form Q. Did you know you used fan art on ___ poll? A. Unless I'd mentioned getting permission from the artist, then please assume that I did not know and let me know. I hate art theft and wouldn't want to partake in that, but I'm just not familiar with a good 80% of the series submitted, so sometimes it might slip through the cracks Q. Can I submit a character who isn't my blorbo? A. Also fine! I enjoy it when people submit controversial characters to see how they'll do Q. What happens if there's a tie? A. The blorbo in question becomes an occassional family member who appears with our found family for some important cutscenes, but isn't officially considered part of the found family

Q. No, but seriously, my blorbo got ditched. Do they get another chance? A. At the beginning of each year we host a Redemption Event, where any past blorbos who were submitted get another chance. Because of the high volume of ditched characters, to be included in the event your character will need to be submitted with propaganda via a form that will be released a month before the event Q. I think the image used is a big reason why my blorbo got ditched. Why did you use that image? A. If an image hasn't been submitted, I will just grab one from an image search result in most cases. You know your blorbos best, so if you have a specific (non-fan art) image that you think shows them in their best light, please do submit it when you submit them Q. Did you mean the book version or movie version of that character? A. Whichever version of the blorbo that gets submitted, that'll be the one I use. If no specific version is mentioned, I'll just post that blorbo in general and use whatever image is most common when I look them up, unless an image has been submitted or a book cover has been requested to be used Q. My blorbo is a character played by a youtuber and/or streamer, not the youtuber or streamer themselves, is that okay? A. If it's a character, then it's fine. But please mention this on the submission. Because if I look them up and the result looks to be just some real person, that won't be included Q. What counts as a "sweep"? A. Any character who gets 90% or higher in either adopt or ditch is counted as a sweep. This doesn't give them anything extra, it's just for bragging rights Q. What counts as a "close call"? A. Any character who's poll results are within the 49%-51% range for adopt/ditch is counted as a close call Q. How many characters can I submit at a time? A. There's no hard rule, since the form doesn't track emails, but please be considerate to others and try not to submit more than 10 characters per submission period. See next question for more details Q. How many characters from the same series can I submit at a time? A. Four (4) characters per series per submission period. I'll be lenient for if they've been submitted by multiple people, but from my experience running this blog, it's only the current Hot New Thing that'll be submitted by multiple people and anything else is usually one person submitting one character after another. I used to allow more, but people took this for granted and submitted 50+ from the same series, so now 4 is the cap Q. You missed a tag from that poll! Can it be added? A. Sure! Tags are either provided by the submitter or where left blank, I'll use my best guess. At minimum, you'll get the name of the character and series as they've been submitted. If you know more, let me know and I'll add them to the post during the voting period. Please note: The polls themselves cannot be edited after being posted, only the tags Q. I don't understand what this blog is A. Don't worry about it, friend. Just keep driving and whatever you do, don't wind down the window. We'll be safe soon :)

#tumblr found family #found family #found family adoption agency #pinned post #welcome #rules #FAQ #signal boosts appreciated

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punkshort · 8 months

Text

Chapter warnings: graphic descriptions of violence, death, blood, language, alcohol, sexual tension etc :)

A/N: I needed to give these poor characters a break lol

Chapter Thirteen

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader, pre-outbreak and post outbreak

AU (the only thing I kept was the outbreak, Joel, and Tommy's characters. Joel's backstory is different, and the way he finds Jackson is different. I may include Ellie one day, I just haven't planned that far)

Fic Summary: You worked for Joel and Tommy a few months before the outbreak. The outbreak happens, and you and Joel get stuck traveling the country and keeping each other safe. Neither of you spoke about the feelings you had for one another pre-outbreak, and in a post-apocalyptic world, it seems like survival should be your only focus. But feelings can't be ignored forever.

Fic tags: Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI), Smut, Language, Canon-Typical Violence, Alcohol Use, Age Difference (Reader is 10 years younger than Joel), slow burn, mutual pining, angst, trauma, SA referencing later but I will put a big warning on those chapters

April 2004

Spring was in the air and the days were getting warmer, which meant you both needed new clothes. You rifled through the closet of the house two doors down, tossing clothes that were both your sizes onto the bed behind you. Whoever lived in the house you were currently staying in was much larger than you and Joel, so you made rags from their clothes, and you ended up searching inside the house down the street.

In the past two months, neither of you had seen an infected or a living person unless you left the area to explore the nearby town. You were beginning to feel like the two of you were living in a little bubble, completely cut off and alone, and it was wonderful. You let yourselves relax, laughing and joking, and you felt comfortable going out by yourself to explore the neighborhood. The houses were practically untouched and stocked with all kinds of food that you could use, and Joel felt confident about starting a fire in the seclusion of the forest. You would make dinner together at night, and afterwards you would play cards, read, or do crosswords in front of the fireplace. It was overwhelmingly domestic and peaceful.

Joel had originally said he wanted to stay there until you were healed and the weather warmed up, but it's been a couple weeks of spring and he hadn't suggested leaving yet. You didn't bring it up because it was as close to normal as you thought you would ever feel again, and you were scared to let it go.

Almost every morning, you woke up with Joel's arms wrapped around you. You were both so used to it by now that it no longer felt forbidden, but it was expected. There hadn’t been another charged moment like that morning in your childhood bedroom, but there had been a few moments here and there that caused your mind to wander. Like when you would make dinner together in the kitchen and Joel would slip by you, gently placing his hands on your hips as he brushed past while you prepared food, or when you sat together reading in front of the fireplace and he draped his arm along the back of the couch, his long fingers grazing your shoulder.

You became an expert at avoiding your feelings for him, so you never acted on those moments. Instead, you distracted yourself with the new world around you. Joel would spend much of his time during the day hunting in the forest and gathering wood for the fire, and you would explore each house on the street, first for supplies, and then for entertainment. You had found a romance novel tucked into the bedside table of the house you were currently rummaging through, deciding at the last minute to bring it back with you for something to read.

You tucked the book in the back of your pants and grunted as you lifted the pile of clothes off the bed. Your wounds had healed pretty well, but you were still a little stiff and you had a few nasty pink scars along your ribs to show for it. You wandered down the street, barely able to see over the clothes, as you made your way back to your white house with blue shutters. Joel had been resting in a rocking chair on the front porch, waiting for your return, when he saw you struggling with the clothes. He jogged down the stairs to meet you halfway and grabbed some from your arms.

“Thanks,” you said, readjusting the clothes as you made your way to the house. “When did you get back?”

“’Bout ten minutes ago. I got lucky early and got us a small doe, probably just a yearling. I got it in the garage, I’ll skin it later.”

“That’s great, we haven’t had venison in a long time,” you said, climbing the stairs up to the front porch. You dropped the clothes unceremoniously on the couch in the living room, deciding to tackle the sorting later.

“What’s this?” Joel asked, yanking the book from the back of your jeans. He glanced at the cover, his eyes widening, and he shot you a teasing smirk. You huffed and tried to tug the book from his hand, but he was too quick, dangling it above your head and then turning around so he could thumb through the pages. He stopped on a page and skimmed a quick paragraph, giving a low whistle. You wrapped your arm around him trying to grab the book, but he anticipated it and twisted away, taking a few steps backwards as he continued to read.

“This is dirty!” he teased, and you felt your face flush.

“I didn’t know what it was, I just grabbed it for something to read!” you lied, lunging forward again but he held his arm out and tucked the book behind his back. You grumbled irritably, your hands on your hips as you glared at him. He tsked at you and waved his finger back and forth.

“Liar,” he said, grinning as you felt another wave of heat roll over your skin. “You’re blushing, you knew what this was.”

You had enough of him embarrassing you now, so you decided two could play that game.

“Fine, maybe I did,” you said, narrowing your eyes at him. “A girl’s got needs, you know.”

You smirked as you watched his teasing grin fade instantly from his face. His gaze darkened as he regarded you for a moment. You stood your ground, hands still on your hips and looking at him defiantly but you could feel your fast heartbeat and the butterflies in your stomach betraying you. He took a step towards you, then another. You played it cool, refusing to break eye contact and let him win, but you couldn’t stop from swallowing nervously. You tilted your head back to continue to meet his gaze once he came to a stop right in front of you. Now that you were up close, you noticed there was a slight pink flush dusting his cheeks. His lips were parted, and you swore he was breathing faster than normal.

“Is that right?” he murmured to you now, his voice unmistakably heavy with desire. You didn’t trust yourself to say anything without it coming out three octaves higher than normal, so instead you slowly nodded your head.

You must have parted your lips without knowing it because he finally broke eye contact to look down at them hungrily. You shifted your weight slightly as you felt your arousal pooling in your underwear. You dropped your arms to your sides and rose to your tip toes, slowly leaning up towards his face. He could smell the soap you used this morning and felt your exhale tickling his neck as you rose higher. He was practically in a trance as his eyes fluttered closed and he leaned down a fraction, eagerly awaiting the feel of your mouth on his.

Once his eyes shut, you swung your arm out and snatched the book from his hand, jumping back and holding it in front of you triumphantly. His eyes snapped open and he held back a groan, the look of disappointment evident on his face.

"That wasn't very nice," he said. His whole body was on fire, and he prayed you didn't notice the growing erection through his jeans.

"Aww," you gave him a teasing frown and pout, tapping the book on his shoulder as you passed him, "don't worry, I'll let you borrow this when I'm done."

After dinner, you and Joel settled into the living room like you always did, today choosing to play cards in front of the fireplace. You were closely examining your hand and struggling to remember the rules of poker Joel had taught you last week. Joel watched you as your brows furrowed and you shuffled the cards around.

"Hey," he said softly, placing his cards facedown and putting his hand out to push yours down as well. You looked up at him curiously, dropping your hands to your lap and fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. "Can we talk about somethin'?"

Your breath caught in your throat when you saw the softness behind his eyes and heard the tone of his voice. This is it, we're finally going to talk about it.

He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "I've wanted to talk to you about this for a while, but I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it," he began, and your heart started thudding in your chest. "Just know that we can do whatever you're comfortable with," he continued, your eyes widening. Holy shit. He took a deep breath and leaned forward on the table, inches away from your face. You thought you were going to pass out from how fast your pulse was racing. "What do you think about gettin' a CB radio?"

You froze, not sure you heard him correctly.

"What?" you asked, your voice cracking.

"A CB radio," he repeated, leaning back in his chair again. "I bet either the fire department or the police station in town's got one. Figure we can listen in on one, maybe there's other survivors, communities... maybe we can even find Tommy."

"Oh!" You said, shaking your head to clear your mind from the wrong direction your thoughts had gone. "Yeah, sure, let's do that."

"I know you really like it here, and I do too," he said, picking his cards back up, "but it's not safe to stay here forever. We gotta have a plan. People'll eventually find us here. Call." He pushed a red button you were using as poker chips into the center of the table.

You nodded and bit your lip, looking back at your cards. You let out a shaky breath, your adrenaline still rushing through your veins.

"You alright?" Joel asked you innocently, noticing you were jittery.

"Yep, I'm fine," you said, sounding clearer now. "I fold." You tossed your cards face up on the table and leaned back as Joel swept the pile of buttons into his hand.

You yawned and stretched your arms above your head. "I think I'm gonna go get ready for bed." You stood and picked up your flashlight to make your way upstairs.

"Did ya think I was talkin' about somethin' else?" He asked lowly, right as your foot hit the first step. You whipped your head around to find him smirking with his arms crossed in his chair. Your jaw dropped and he winked as your cheeks began to feel hot.

"That wasn't very nice," you repeated his words back to him before ascending the stairs to bed.

New Virginia, Iowa was a very small town that consisted of a few churches, a library, a handful of restaurants and a post office. The whole town appeared deserted except for a few infected, most of which the pair of you took care of when you first explored the town back in March. Joel had trouble trying to break into the front door of the police station, so you tried your luck with another entrance attached to the small parking garage. You shifted your backpack on your shoulders as you waited for him to jimmy open the lock. Whenever you left the safety of your house you always made sure to pack both your bags with all your necessities. Even though the past couple months have been quiet and relaxing, you refused to let yourselves be caught off guard. You brought your supplies and weapons with you whenever you left the neighborhood, never knowing for sure if you would have to make a run for it one day.

You glanced around the parking garage once again before hearing the telltale click of the lock breaking.

"Shit," Joel whispered harshly. You turned back to look at him and saw blood dripping down his palm. You dropped your pack to the floor and rummaged around for a handful of rags, pressing one into his hand before digging for some rubbing alcohol. You both sat down on the floor, his hand held out to you while you gently cleaned his cut, first with some water, then with the alcohol. He hissed at the sting and clenched his eyes shut while you pressed a clean rag against the cut and squeezed his other hand comfortingly.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, removing the rag to assess the damage. He opened his eyes and watched as you tended so delicately to his injury. He stared adoringly at your face while you were distracted, taking in the way you bit down on your lower lip in concentration, the loose strands of hair that dangled in front of your eyes, the little frown your brows made. He had been so distracted that he didn't even notice you were done patching him up. You looked up at him and smiled.

"Good as new. Well, I think, anyway. Cut doesn't look that deep, I don't think you need stitches." He looked down and saw you had expertly wrapped his hand tightly with a couple of rags. He flexed his fingers as he tested his mobility.

"Thanks," he said, standing back up and looking back down on the floor at his broken hunting knife. He sighed. "I really liked that knife."

"We can find you a new one," you said, pushing the door open a crack to listen inside. You pushed it open all the way and scanned your flashlights over the room. As expected, it was empty. You both walked past a few desks towards the back of the room, opening up each door until you found a gun locker. You were about to offer to work on the lock instead but Joel walked up and the door swung right open. He turned back to you with his eyebrows raised and shrugged.

“Small town, I guess,” he said, looting around for more ammo and then pulled out a handgun. He checked that it was loaded and handed it to you, remembering yours was stolen from your house after you left it with Tim and Lucy. You double checked the safety was on and shoved it in the back of your jeans, pulling your light jacket over the top. Joel couldn’t find any knives, but he did find two retractable police batons. You tested it out with a flick of your wrist, the baton extending instantly in your hand, then collapsed it so it would fit in your jacket pocket.

You left the armory and went to explore the police chief’s office where Joel found a CB radio on top of a filing cabinet next to the desk. He flipped it around to examine it, then picked up the transceiver and microphone, shoving it into his pack.

“Maybe we can find a car battery in the parking ramp before we go home, get this thing workin’," Joel said, but all you heard was the word home. You grinned like an idiot once his back was to you, leading you out of the police station.

Joel pried open the hoods on the cars remaining in the parking ramp, trying to find a battery that still had power and was in good condition. You yawned and meandered around the corner, looking for something to occupy yourself while he worked. You saw a car with the passenger door open and what looked like duffel bags inside. You glanced at Joel over your shoulder, his head buried under the hood of a red sedan.

“I’m gonna go take a look at this car down here, see if there’s anything we can use,” you said. He turned around and looked at the car you had pointed out. He nodded before saying, “Be careful.”

He was muttering to himself as he unhooked yet another dead battery when he felt the cold metal barrel of a pistol press against the back of his head.

“Don’t say a word, or we kill the girl,” a deep voice said quietly behind him. We. He froze and swung his eyes around frantically, trying to think of anything he could do to get the upper hand. He glanced down at the revolver on his hip, but the man behind him already saw it. “Two fingers. Pick it up slowly, and hand it over. Slow.”

Joel did as he was told, his heart slamming against his ribs as he listened for any indication that you were hurt.

“Stand up, turn around, hands in the air,” the man said, and again, Joel obeyed. He was faced with two men, one of which was now sheathing his knife in favor of Joel’s revolver. He looked behind them, trying to spot you by the car you said you were looking through, but you weren’t there. He began to panic, and his vision narrowed.

“Take whatever you want, just don’t hurt her,” he said gruffly to the men, but his eyes gave away how fearful he was. They chuckled, slinging Joel’s backpack over their shoulder along with the rifle he had set down next to it. “Please,” he tried again, begging.

“Don’t worry,” sneered the man holding his revolver. “We got a friend taking real good care of her.”

Before Joel’s mind could even process the implication, he heard a man’s wild, high-pitched scream coming from the other end of the parking ramp, around a corner none of you could see beyond. The two men exchanged nervous glances, then one single gunshot rang out, echoing over the concrete walls. The men stared at the corner of the garage, guns still aimed on Joel, waiting to see who had pulled the trigger.

Joel tried to control his panicked breaths until he saw you round the corner with a look of anger and determination on your face. In one hand was your handgun, and the other was reaching into your jacket pocket, flicking open the police baton. Your eyes were glued to the two men threatening Joel, your jaw clenched, and nostrils flared as you suddenly picked up your pace and made a beeline towards the one holding Joel’s revolver.

Joel could tell you had surprised them with your bold plan of attack, so he took advantage of it and lunged forward, tackling the man who originally held a gun to his head. He knocked the gun out of his hand, and it skidded under a parked car. Joel began mercilessly beating the man’s face with his fist, watching as he broke his nose and then his jaw, only stopping when he noticed his own blood began to flow from his knuckles and the injury on his palm. As he stood up, he pulled the knife from his boot. The man’s eyes shifted towards the knife and then back at Joel with a wild look in his eye.

“No! No, no, no, please, I’ll –“ before he could finish, Joel rammed the knife into the man’s chest with a grunt. He made sure he was dead before pulling the knife out and stumbled in your direction, but as it turned out, you didn’t need any help. You had the other man on the floor with your foot on his chest as you removed your own switchblade from the side of his neck.

You turned around, gasping for breath from the exertion, and wiped the blood from your face with the sleeve of your jacket. Joel strode right up to you and yanked you into a tight hug, pressing the side of your head against his chest. You could hear how fast his heart was beating as you wrapped your arms around his waist and closed your eyes. He finally allowed you to pull back, but he held your face in both his hands, looking you up and down for any injuries.

“I’m fine, I promise,” you told him, covering his hands with your own and gently tugging them downward. You folded the switchblade and baton back up and put them away before leaning over and picking up Joel’s revolver, along with the dead man's knife. “Told you we'd get you a new one,” you joked, trying to lighten the mood as you could tell Joel was still shaken from the fight. He let out a small chuckle before picking up his belongings.

“What the hell did ya do to that guy to make him scream like that?”

“I stabbed him in the balls,” you said, glancing sideways at him and catching the wince on his face.

“Fuck the battery, let’s go home,” he told you, wrapping an arm around you for one more half hug before heading back out the way you came.

Once you got back to the house, you each took a turn washing the blood and grime off your bodies before preparing some venison to eat for dinner. You had made a packet of instant mashed potatoes and you shared a can of green beans as you settled on the couch to eat. Halfway through the meal, Joel's eyes lit up and he turned towards you.

"Wait here, I forgot I found somethin', I'll be right back," and he headed out to the attached garage to bring back two bottles of white wine. You gasped, grabbing them from his hands to look at the labels in the light of the fire.

"When did you find these?" you asked, still in shock.

"Couple days ago in the basement of the green house. I was settin' them aside for a special occasion, and seein' as you kicked so much ass earlier, I figured today is that day," he said, heading into the kitchen to find a corkscrew and glasses.

"Well, I don't know if I kicked ‘so much’ ass, I think I kicked an average amount of ass," you giggled, sitting back down to finish your meal as he poured you each a glass. You tried to ignore how casually you spoke about killing other people as you gratefully took a glass from his hand, taking your first sip and letting a moan escape your lips. Joel smiled and went back to finishing his dinner, trying to ignore the sound you made.

Your plates long discarded and on your second glasses of wine, you insisted on properly bandaging the cut on his palm, now that the bath he took had washed away all the dried blood. You tipped his hand towards the light of the flames as you diligently sanitized the cut again before sticking a big, rectangular bandaid over it.

"Maybe you should take some antibiotics," you said, gently running a finger down the bandage. "That parking ramp was filthy." He shrugged as he watched you lazily tracing his cut through the bandage.

"Yeah, maybe, I'll take one tomorrow," he mumbled. He could tell his alcohol tolerance was next to nothing after all these months because the wine was going right to his head. You flipped his hand over and ran your fingers gently along his damaged knuckles. His breath hitched at the contact, and he took another sip of wine to hide it. Maybe the wine was going to your head, too.

You dragged your gaze up from his hand to his exposed forearms, remembering how fixated you were on them just a year ago. You bit your lip and reached for your glass, in the process dropping his hand to rest on your knee. You almost gasped, then had to stifle a laugh at how absurd it was to have such a reaction to a simple touch on your knee. You took another sip of wine and blamed the fact you hadn't had sex in nearly a year as the reason. The time you had sex with Justin wasn't exactly fulfilling, so it hardly counted. You stole a glance in Joel's direction as he stared at the open fireplace and sipped his wine. You thought back again to that night at the bar when Joel asked you to go home with him. You could kick yourself now for not doing it. You knew he was still attracted to you by the way you saw his pants tighten yesterday when you teased him with the book, and months ago back in your bedroom when you had almost kissed. That day, you were ready to take things further with him, even with the understanding that all he was willing to offer you was the physical part of a relationship.

"Why are you lookin' at me like that?" he asked you without taking his eyes off the fire.

"Like what?" you replied lowly.

"You know what," he said, turning to you now. His beautiful brown eyes were a shade darker as he looked at you, his fingers curling around your knee, this time pulling a gasp from you.

You decided to go for it. You put your glass down and slid over to sit a little closer to him as he eyed you warily. You trailed your fingertip along the back of his hand again, admiring how long and thick his fingers were before dragging a line up his forearm and wrapped your hand around it gently.

"Can I tell you a secret?" you asked huskily, staring down as your thumb rubbed his arm.

"Mhmm," he murmured, entranced by the contact.

"When we first met, I couldn't stop thinking about your arms. Every time I saw you... I was just so distracted," you flicked your eyes up to his face and watched as he held his breath at your words. He finally found his voice and brought his eyes up to look at you.

"That wasn't exactly a secret," he whispered, "even Tommy noticed that."

You hummed, refusing to let any embarrassment throw you off. You watched as he took another sip of wine and tried a different tactic.

"Do you remember the last time I had wine like this?" you asked, raising your eyebrow. You saw his Adam's apple stopped bobbing mid swallow. That did the trick.

"Yes," he said roughly, looking straight ahead at the fire again, his grip on your knee tightening as you slowed the circles your thumb was making on his arm.

"That was a fun night," you said, willing him to look at you again.

"Followed by a not so fun day," Joel replied, trying to throw some cold water on the conversation. You sighed, growing frustrated as he put his glass down on the coffee table.

"Right, the outbreak," you muttered, your hand releasing his arm.

"No," he said, finally turning towards you. "Because that's the day I fucked everything up." His eyes burned into yours, desperately trying to say the words.

"You didn't fuck everything up," you told him, scooting even closer to him on the couch. You leaned forward and put a hand on his knee for balance, then placed a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. He let out a shaky sigh and wrapped his other hand around your wrist.

"What are you doin'?" he asked, fighting the urge to give in.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" you said back, planting another small kiss in the same place. His grip on your wrist loosened and he swallowed hard.

"Please," he croaked out, his expression pained when you leaned back to look at him. "Don't do this again. I don't think I can take it."

You frowned, confused. Maybe he didn't realize you now understood what he wanted. You reached out a hand to rest on the back of his neck.

"It doesn't have to mean anything," you murmured to him, licking your lips. "I get it now."

Now Joel was the one to frown and pulled his head back a fraction to discourage your kiss.

"Is that what you want?" he asked, unable to hide his heartache as he searched your eyes for an answer. Maybe the wine was getting to you more than he thought. You paused, genuinely perplexed now.

"Isn't that what you want?" you asked him, your brows knit.

"What are you talkin' about?" he questioned louder now, turning his whole body to face you, your hands dropping to your lap as he removed his hand from your knee.

"The day we fought in your office, the day I quit, your birthday!" you said, your voice getting louder with each word.

"What does that have to do with this?" Joel asked, his voice filled with despair. What the hell were you talking about?

"You got mad at me for not sleeping with you!" you all but shouted now, getting angry you had to spell it out for him. "I didn't want to just have sex back then, but I'm trying to tell you now that I'm fucking fine with that, if that's all you want!"

You stared at each other for a minute, both panting slightly as you got increasingly agitated. Joel shook his head and rubbed his hands up and down his face. Then he suddenly stopped and his hands grasped your shoulders, bringing you an inch closer.

"Do you got any idea what you do to me?!" he exclaimed, almost shaking you. You could hear the pain in his voice as it cracked. "'Course that's not all I want. I want everything! I want you!"

Your breath caught in your throat at his admission, completely stunned. You shook your head now, finally asking him the question that weighed on your mind for months.

"Then why did you call me a whore?" you asked, softly now, your voice laced with sadness. He slowly dropped his hands from your shoulders, casting his eyes downward in shame. His eyebrows furrowed as he brought his fingers up to pinch the bridge of his nose, sighing before dropping his hand to his lap and looking back up at you.

"I..." he began, chewing on his lip and casting his gaze around the room to collect his thoughts before continuing. "I saw you that day, before you came up to my office," he said, looking back at you now, your lips parting as you tried to think back. He could see the confusion in your face. "I had no right to feel, to think, you were mine," he added, "but when I saw you flirtin' with him, I just lost it."

You frowned and pursed your lips, still not making the connection.

"Flirting with who?" you asked, cocking your head to the side.

"That guy in your department, the one that was at the bar that night!" He said, throwing his hands in the air. "I saw you dancin' with him in the goddamn copy room. It's my own fault, I knew we weren't anythin', but I guess I'd hoped... and that fuckin' copy room... it just set me off," he said, looking deep into your eyes before finally saying, "I'm so sorry."

You remembered now. He had seen you dancing with Kyle in the copy room. Kyle. You shouldn't have found it funny, but the wine coupled with how ridiculous your fight seemed now made you giggle, which then escalated to full blown laughter as your covered your mouth, turning your face away from Joel's intense stare. He raised an eyebrow at you, still not finding it funny. You saw he was patiently waiting for you to explain, so you wiped a stray tear away from the corner of your eye and composed yourself.

"Joel... Kyle was gay," you said, still trying to hide your smirk. You watched his face as he absorbed the words, his pained expression slowly softening and his eyebrows relaxing.

"I'm so fuckin' stupid," he whispered, his bandaged hand reaching out to grasp the back of your neck and pulled you into him, his lips locking onto yours. You whimpered as you brought your hands up to rake through his hair, his other hand coming to rest on your hip before sliding down your leg. He leaned forward to push you backwards onto the couch. Hovering above you, he hooked your leg around his waist and rested his hand back on your hip, licking at your bottom lip. You eagerly opened your mouth at his request, deepening the kiss as you ran your tongue alongside his own, tasting the remnants of the wine between you. You moaned into his mouth, removing one hand from his hair and wrapping it around his back, trying to bring him closer. You were desperate to taste and feel him everywhere, a year of yearning for him finally coming to a head.

Joel could hardly see straight from the adrenaline coursing through his body. Every nerve ending felt alive. He thought he ruined his chance of ever being with you. He had resigned himself to a life where he was content with just being near you and occasionally got to hold you at night. His emotions were so overwhelming that his movements were becoming chaotic, his hand briefly sliding from your hip to cup your ass, then back to your hip. His other hand moved from the back of your neck to hold your jaw in place as he broke contact from your mouth for a moment, just to flip his head in the other direction before sliding his tongue back inside your mouth.

You arched your back off the couch to press your body against him. You tugged at the back of his t-shirt and wrapped your other leg around his waist, pulling him all the way down so he was laying on top of you. You lifted your hips up to grind against the erection straining against his jeans, eliciting a groan from Joel, when you felt something sharp digging into your thigh. You let go of his shirt and brought your hand around to his chest, pushing him up and breaking the kiss. You had to tug gently on his hair to keep him from latching his mouth onto your neck.

“Wait,” you gasped. He removed his hand from your hip and pushed his fist into the couch cushion, holding himself above you. “What is that?” you asked, flicking your eyes downward. He paused, confused, as he looked down at his cock rubbing against your inner thigh through his jeans, then back up to you.

“Not that,” you said, removing your hand from his hair and swatting playfully at his shoulder before reaching down to his pocket. “This.”

“Oh,” his face broke out into a warm smile now as he removed his hand from your jaw and dug into his pocket, pulling out the Texas shaped keychain. He dangled it between you, still smiling as he watched the realization hit you. Your jaw dropped as you stared at it and then gently reached out to take it from him, turning it over in your hands before looking back up at him. You couldn’t help it. Tears sprung to your eyes as you swallowed roughly, biting your lower lip. He pressed his wounded palm back against your jaw, using his thumb to pull your lip from your teeth and then wiped a stray tear from your cheek.

“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, sweetheart,” he whispered, running his thumb across your cheek again. “Please forgive me.” You choked back a sob at the pet name he refrained from calling you for so long. The last time you heard it, it was said with such cruelty and disdain, and to hear it now, said with so much love and adoration, nearly broke you. You could only nod your head enthusiastically, not trusting yourself to speak as you looped the keyring around your finger and pulled him back down to you.

This time, the intensity behind your kiss escalated. You gently raked your fingernails through his hair and then up and down his back, your tongues swirling together, quiet moans leaving your mouth and being swallowed up by his as you ground your hips up into him, begging him to take things further. He broke your kiss to allow you to get some air, but he continued, leaving gentle kisses along your jaw, nipping at your earlobe, then traveling down your neck, occasionally giving your skin a warm lick if he felt he had left a mark with his teeth. You reached down with the keychain still looped around your finger, and fumbled hastily with his belt buckle. He stopped his assault on your neck and pulled back, taking his hand from your face to stop yours from undoing his belt. You frowned as you laid underneath him, gasping for breath.

“Not tonight,” he panted, drawing a whine from you. “We’ve been drinking,” he continued, bringing your hand away from his belt to rest above your head, where he pressed your wrist into the arm of the couch. “I wanna take my time,” he leaned forward, gently pressing his mouth against your swollen lips before pulling back, “and remember,” giving you another languid kiss, “every,” he pressed his lips against your cheek, “single,” kissing the tip of your nose, “sound you make for me,” he finished, massaging his lips tenderly against yours again.

You groaned against his mouth and you felt his lips tug into a smile.

"It'll be worth it, I promise," he whispered against your lips, his grip tightening against your wrist as you squirmed under him. He tugged on your wrist as he rolled off of you and onto his back, pulling you onto your side and under his arm. You rested your cheek against his chest and drew lazy patterns on his stomach, while he absentmindedly dragged his thumb over your upper back and stared into the fire. You slid the keychain off your finger and tucked it back into his jeans pocket with a smile. You couldn't believe he had it, after all this time, and never said a word.

"Why don't we go up to bed?" he mumbled as his eyes slid shut. You nodded and nuzzled your face into his chest.

"In a minute," you told him, your eyes closing. He hummed in response before his thumb slowed its movement on your back and you heard him softly snoring. It wasn't long until you had also drifted off, your arms wrapped around each other.

Chapter Fourteen

Tag list: @chiogarza, @sparklejumpropequeen-777, @shotgun-shelby

#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fic #joel the last of us #tlou hbo #the last of us hbo #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller series #joel x reader #joel x reader smut #joel miller angst #joel miller fluff #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us game #the way we were joel miller fic

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emojellyace08 · 8 months

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Lookism Men x Female Reader "Their types on a woman PART 5"

I just realized I haven't made a Jace and Jerry one for this (sorry xD). This one will be probably shorter since I want to insert 4 characters at a time in posts (I hate text limits lol). Genre: Fluff☁️ smut/lemon🍋, slight crack🧨(comedy) Warnings: slang terms of female genitalia/body parts (tits, ass, etc.), slight mentions of sex on the bottom parts, trust issues, insecurities

Jerry Kwon (Kwon Ji Tae)

Unpopular opinion: He deserves more love and support from the fandom. Just look at him he's just too cute man.

Anyways, we all know that behind his tough shell Jerry is actually a fluff ball. So it's no problem socializing and befriending him out of pure kindness. He's super nice to everybody trust me (except from his enemies of course).

Like most of the boys, Jerry likes kind and humble women. He's also attracted to very short ones since he founds them really cute especially if they're the same age as him. He's the type to give you piggy backs when you're legs hurt from walking 🥺. He'll also the type to be protective and he'll always walk you to home after school too.

He would also appreciate your friendly personality especially when you don't judge him by his looks. Most people were pretty scared of him since he doesn't look like a "normal student" or the others often mistaken him as a father lol. He still can't help but to be a bit insecure sometimes but he just brushes these things off making him more a bit confident about himself. So being a warm goofball, being loyal and honest to him can really catch his attention and you can form a special bond with him.

Headcannon: Like Eli, Jerry also likes women who can be helpful in the kitchen/household chores. Because of the Workers always creating trouble, it's hard for him to relax and rest so cooking his comfort food for him makes him happy. He'll also bake with you if he has the free time!

And Jerry also likes a woman who's not only kind to others but also very gentle with animals. He'll also share you pictures of little pups and kittens he saw on the street and he'll feel a bit bad when you scold him since you're worried that the stray animal will bite him lol (but he knows that you're just worried about him so he's not really pissed off at you and he always reassure you that he's careful when approaching stray animals). "Look Y/N I saw this poor kitten on the street let's take care of it!" your bf exclaimed as he carries an orange/ginger cat wrapped on a soft towel. "Jerry, are you sure? Doesn't that bite your hand? It's probably infected." you scolded him as he has that puppy eyes again which will work on you again, bastard. "Can we keep it? Please?" he pleaded as you sighed knowing that you can't stop him from adopting the animal. Besides the it looks pretty cute too. "Okay fine, give him to me" you smiled at him as his eyes sparkled even more. "I think the kitten's a girl! Let's name her Ginger!" "Ginger? That's a really nice name."

Jerry will also pair up with you in music class if you can play a musical instrument or if you have a decent singing voice if you don't mind. He can't help but stare at you when you're focused in singing or playing your instrument of choice, he finds it really cool! (Now imagine a Lookism Musical/Band AU that would be lit).

This mochi looking guy is super gentle with you which facades his tough persona when he's out to protect Jake, Big Deal and especially his sweet, kind and polite girlfriend of course. He's also warm and cuddly like a teddy bear so there's no problem with hugging him! (He'll often ask for permission if he can hug you. Respect).

Jace Park (Park Bum Jae)

Another one who's underrated af. Like I want to give this man a hug (and also child support).

To be honest he's not the type to look out or approach women. Heck, he'll be the type to say that he would rather die than stay on the Earth with only one girl who he doesn't even know. But we all know that he's a hopeless romantic deep inside. So his chances with getting a girlfriend can be pretty low (it's just his self esteem getting in the way).

But he can't help but to stay at a woman's side when she's nice, gentle, smart and fun to hang out. He can really relate and look up to a girl who seems to be relatable. You can form a special relationship with him if you're the type to read books or if you're the type to be chatty with new interesting ideas and theories with entertaining topics. With these traits like this you can easily get Jace's attention. But after that incident when the girl he was crushing on was actually a spy, his trauma just got worse.

Headcannon: He has trust issues to almost everybody. The only ones he has faith in was no other than Vasco and Burn Knuckles since he has devoted his heart on his gang that he can consider a loving family now (also Allied but not too much he's just helping them out for business). So what's the most important fundamental on a woman for him is that having a trust-worthy girlfriend. It just warms him up more and made him willing to socialize with others. It will take a lot of times to actually approach him since he's already being cautious. But knowing that Jace is smart and it's just his feelings getting in the ways sometimes, he might start talking to you.

And we all know that he's been bullied, used and hurt a bunch of times. And not wanting to appear as vulnerable and weak, he often has to put on this tough persona. But having a girlfriend whom he can trust and who will actually listen to his problems/attentive/good listener can make his stress less worse. And of course, if he really loves and appreciates you a lot he's willing to listen to your problems too and give the best advices that he can give.

He's also insecure about his ears. So having a someone who's standards in looks are not too high can boosts his confidence. He really likes it when you play with his ears despite him denying it. He doesn't like other people touching him but if it's massages coming from his someone I'm pretty sure he can't resist it. He loves your soft hands but it just depends on his mood honestly. If he's working/studying it can be a bit annoying if you start being clingy but he can't control himself from cuddling with you either. "Wow, Jace your ears are so soft like marshmallows." you fondled with your "best friend's" ears as he is reading a book. "Y/N... I'm doing something important." he groans as you won't stop playing with his ear lobes, but it honestly feels good. "You've been reading your silly book for 2 hours now." you pouted as he looks at you with a raised eyebrow. "Hey, first this book is not silly at it actually has a good plot. And second, you've been waiting for me to finish this when it will take 2 more ho-" his sentence was cut off when you gave a peck on his cheek. His inner self was screaming internally like a firecracker wanting to explode. "C'mon now silly let's go to dinner. There's a new SamG place on the street!" you exclaimed as you held his hand almost making him stumble. You can see the redness on his face reaching to his ears.

Breaking his trust can be a huge problem in your relationship. So please be honest with him.

Vin Jin (Vin Ho Bin)

I hate him at first for bullying Duke but I kin him so much lol.

Unpopular opinion: I think Vin would like women who are up to his standards. If you have a pretty face, cool vibes, nice ass and big tits he'll be chasing after you lol. He's also pretty toxic especially if it's the start of the Lookism series. He let his anger take over him so he really needs someone who's emotionally strong, mature and understanding.

He also really hates whiny girls (the ones who tries to act cute but ends up being cringy lol). There's times that he may get turned on by this but if a woman act like this most of the times he'll get agitated. So just be yourself.

Vin also likes women who share his humor. Like if you're the type to make sex jokes or dark humor a lot (y'know the memes that you can watch on Youtube), he'll definitely be more relaxed and composed around you.

He also likes stubborn and competitive women (especially the ones who's shorter than him who acts so tough lol). He really gets entertained if you started challenging him about stupid things. "VIN JIN! LET'S ARM WRESTLE AGAIN!" you challenged the raven-haired male who's wearing that silly dark shade googles again making him make a smug. "Bitch, I already won stop being an ass." he smirked at you, finding it cute when you pout at his statement. "Huh, you just cheated again dumbass!" you screeched at him while he makes a mocking expression. "Hah? And so what you gonna do about it?" "Can you both shut the fuck up?" Mary scolded the both of you because of the teacher already coming to your classroom (slay queen).

But after getting through some character development (slowly but surely), I think Vin would realize that what he really needs is an understanding woman who's also a good listener. We all know he's insecure about having his pupil hyperplasia. He'll started softening up if he has a "girl friend" who will not make fun about his eye disease.

He also really likes women who can be easily teased. Especially when you deny that you really like him even when you act like an asshole to him lmao. "C'mon Y/N I know you find me hot. Just ask me out on a date already." he smirk as he can see the blush on your cheeks getting darker. "F-FUCK OFF WILL YOU! I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU!" "But Mary said that you li-" you hit his arms a bunch of times as he let out a guffaw at your reaction. "AND YOU BELIEVED HER?! YOU REALLY ARE A DUMBASS!"

If he's an ass, he needs someone who's both mentally stable and unstable. It's the perfect balance of destruction.

#lookism x reader #lookism x y/n #lookism x you #vin jin x reader #lookism fic #jace x reader #jerry kwon x reader

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piratecaptainscaptainpirates · 4 months

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I mostly lurk and don't read a lot of ofmd fic (short ones, no au) but one I haven't seen much of is hurt/comfort where Stede is the hurtee/comfortee. I know Ed gets the most comforting but, IMO, Stede deserves some too, poor guy. I do like hurt/comfort a lot, so if you are moved to write something like this I would love to read it.

I remember an expression from back in the bronze age of fanfic, h/c, and slashfic that "if he's smaller or blonder, he's toast." Stede meets both those requirements, LOL! Anyway, thanks for asking for asks. Enjoy your posts and fic.

Yesss, Stede needs some comfort!! Bon appetit!

Send me a prompt and I'll write a 1k word fic!

Ed didn’t realize what had woken him up, at first. The sunlight was just beginning to creep in through the curtains, and Stede’s shoulders were shaking. Stede was crying, little hiccups and hitching breaths as he tried to stay quiet, and Ed was reaching for his hand before he opened his eyes.

“Sorry,” Stede mumbled, squeezing Ed’s fingers with one hand and rubbing at his eyes with the other. His voice was creaky and wet, and it made Ed’s chest feel tight. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.” Ed couldn’t say Stede hadn’t woken him up, because he had. It wasn’t his fault, it just…was. He thought he would’ve felt it, no matter how hard Stede tried to hide it. He would have felt Stede’s pain in the air itself. “I’m glad you did,” he said instead, and it was true. He never wanted Stede to have to cry alone again. “What’s wrong?” Stede’s bottom lip trembled. “Have a bad dream?” Ed guessed. Slowly, Stede nodded, and Ed repositioned them, tangling their legs together under the blankets and pulling Stede into his chest. Stede pillowed his head on Ed’s bicep, one hand slipping under the covers to rest over Ed’s bare hip, tracing little nonsense patterns onto his skin. “You can tell me about it,” Ed said softly. “You don’t have to. But you can if you want to, you know I’ll listen.” Stede stared up at the ceiling, pursing his lips. “Might make you feel better,” Ed offered. Stede’s hand had gone all still where he’d been rubbing circles over Ed’s hip. “You listen to me talking about mine,” Ed went on. “It’s not fair, for you to just go on pretending you’re not having them. You don’t have to - no talking required here! - but you can. If you wanna.”

“I don’t know if I can,” Stede said carefully, his eyes flicking away from Ed’s. He sighed up at the ceiling. “Hardly seems fair. You have more right to bad dreams than I do-” “Stede, babe, it doesn’t work like that.” Ed reached up with his free hand to pull his hair, still in the ponytail he’d put it up in before bed, over his shoulder. The gesture accomplished what he’d set out to do, and Stede got his hand in it immediately, gently running a hand through his hair. “It’s not a competition. We can both have bad dreams, doesn’t mean you’re trying to…what, steal all the attention?” “Well,” Stede wheedled. “You listen here, Bonnet,” Ed said, lowering his voice to be all fake-menacing, “you better let me give you all the attention I want, or there’ll be - I dunno, consequences?” “Oh, no, not the consequences,” Stede pretended to whine. “Yep. I’ll eat all your dessert tonight,” Ed vowed. “So, if you feel like you wanna, you better talk to me. If you don’t want consequences. Because I’ll do that.” “Oh, I don’t doubt you would,” Stede chuckled, but he still looked hesitant, so… “How about this,” Ed said. “You could always make it into a story, if you like. Pretend you’re talking about someone else? Might be easier.” “I could try that,” Stede conceded. Ed hummed softly as Stede thought, enjoying the feeling of Stede’s gentle hand in his hair. “Once upon a time,” Stede began, “there was a very, very selfish man-” “Hey.” Ed gently poked Stede’s ribs. “What have we decided about this?” “Ow!” Stede squirmed away from Ed’s fingers, then flicked the tip of his nose in retaliation, and they both burst into giggles. “Seriously, though,” Ed said through his laugh.

“Fine, fine!” Stede huffed. “Once upon a time, there was a man who really wasn’t terribly or unusually selfish, if you were very generous with your definitions and were also feeling charitable on the day you decided to describe him.” “That’s better,” Ed allowed. “Thank you.” Stede gave him a small smile, but his eyes were getting distant, again. He had a faraway look Ed didn’t care for. “And that only typically selfish man once hurt someone he loves very badly, and he was almost too late to ever see him again. And he worries that he might just keep hurting him, because there’s something - something rotten in him, and it hurts people. He’s trying to be brave, and strong, and he’s trying to believe he’s not broken. But he’s not all that brave, and he’s not all that strong. The end.” Stede’s voice went all weak and shaky at the end, and Ed let out a breath through his teeth. Talking it through, when it came to the two of them, was usually a bit of a weepy affair. But it didn’t always have to be. Ed was getting better, at trusting Stede, at trusting himself, at knowing what would make Stede feel better. “Not all that strong?” Ed playfully squeezed Stede’s bicep. “C’mon, mate, have you even seen these guns?” Stede laughed, gratefully burying his nose in Ed’s neck when Ed threw an arm across his waist to hold him close. “Seriously, babe.” Ed leaned forward for a sweet little peck of a kiss, only pulling back far enough to brush their noses together. “You’re, like, the strongest guy I know.” “Ed, I wish you wouldn’t tease me-” “No teasing here,” Ed promised. “Seriously, you blow me away. You’re so thoughtful, and kind, and you’re so you all the time-” “That might actually be part of the problem.” “No, Stede, don’t you get it?” Ed cupped Stede’s face in his hands, making him hold eye contact, making him listen without looking away. “That takes a lot of guts, man. You never let anyone tell you who you should be, and I admire the hell out of you for it.” “Well, that’s…” Stede tried to hold back a smile, obviously flattered. “You’re so sweet.” “Not just a pretty face, huh?” Stede laughed, pressing his forehead against Ed’s, and Ed leaned in to meet him for a kiss that tasted like home.

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd fic #my fics #actually managed to keep it to exactly 1k words. clap

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mysteriouslybluepirate · 5 months

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Queer Book Recommendations!!

I haven't really read a book book in years. Due to money problems and a lack of free time, audiobooks and AO3 were a MUCH cheaper option for me. But now that I'm struggling to fully read text posts on Tumblr I realize my attention span is shot. Reading novels is helping me tune out and focus in again. So I'm turning to queer novels written by my 'queer elders'.

For anyone who is struggling to get back into long form content after reading Fic for years, I highly recommend the books of TJ KLUNE (summaries of what I've read under the break).

If you are a fan of the 'escaping a shitty life and being welcomed into a found family' fanworks, this is the writer for you! All his stories center on home and feeling welcomed and loved. Of middle age and finding out who you are. Of finding love for others and yourself. He makes you hunger for that type of romantic and platonic love where people just know the real you. His stories also float by so quickly, there are so many things he does that I want to emulate his writing into my work.

Someone on Tumblr described the romances as: “what if a real life disney prince fell in love with the human equivalent of a wet paper bag?” and I agree 100%. All his protagonists are just like that, and I love them all.

(Also, this man definitely had an office job he hated, and writes office work culture as a death sentence in every one of his novels and I love it).

If you have any queer novels you love, don't be afraid to leave me a recommendation! (Especially WLW that isn't 'One Last Stop')

HAVE READ: The House in the Cerulean Sea : [An amazing love fantastical found family story (with a hint of romance)! I listened to the audiobook on Audible and absolutely loved it! I can't wait for the sequel coming out next year.]

Linus Baker is a lonely case worker for a governmental organization which manages orphaned kids who are magical beings.

One day, he's given a secret assignment to assess a special orphanage on the island of Marsyas, run by a man named Arthur Parnassus, who has secrets of his own. Among the six unique children living there, one of them is Lucy, short for Lucifer, who just happens to be the Antichrist.

Despite his initial reservations, as Linus's days pass in Marsyas, in this idyllic setting among a coterie of magical children, Linus finds himself coming across a little romance, an unlikely family and possibly even a home.

Currently Reading: Under the Whispering Door. [I know this is going to be heartbreaking, but I'm loving it, only on page 50/373. Will likely post something vague about how it made me cry lol]

When a reaper comes to collect Wallace Price from his own funeral, Wallace suspects he really might be dead.

Instead of leading him directly to the afterlife, the reaper takes him to a small village. On the outskirts, off the path through the woods, tucked between mountains, is a particular tea shop, run by a man named Hugo. Hugo is the tea shop's owner to locals and the ferryman to souls who need to cross over.

But Wallace isn't ready to abandon the life he barely lived. With Hugo's help, he finally starts to learn about all the things he missed in life.

When the Manager, a curious and powerful being, arrives at the tea shop and gives Wallace one week to cross over, Wallace sets about living a lifetime in seven days.

Planning on reading: In The Lives of Puppets(The book is on my shelf).

In a strange little home built into the branches of a grove of trees, live three robots—fatherly inventor android Giovanni Lawson, a pleasantly sadistic nurse machine, and a small vacuum desperate for love and attention. Victor Lawson, a human, lives there too. They’re a family, hidden and safe.

The day Vic salvages and repairs an unfamiliar android labelled “HAP,” he learns of a shared dark past between Hap and Gio–a past spent hunting humans.

When Hap unwittingly alerts robots from Gio’s former life to their whereabouts, the family is no longer hidden and safe. Gio is captured and taken back to his old laboratory in the City of Electric Dreams. So together, the rest of Vic’s assembled family must journey across an unforgiving and otherworldly country to rescue Gio from decommission, or worse, reprogramming.

Along the way to save Gio, amid conflicted feelings of betrayal and affection for Hap, Vic must decide for himself: Can he accept love with strings attached?

#They are utter delights #dont be surprised if my next long Izzy fic is inspired by 'under the whispering door' lol #Under the Whispering Door #The House in the Cerulean Sea #tj klune #Sometimes I just want to read a sweet queer love story with people older than 20 god damn it

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hwanghyunjinenthusiast · 1 year

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Do you think about me?

AN: I was originally going to post a Felix fic for Valentine's Day, but I realised I haven't posted any fics about Seungmin yet, and this was the perfect time. Kill two birds with one stone. I do have a softer Seungmin fic in my drafts, but I chose violence because I don't love myself obviously lol. Happy Valentine's Day!

Synopsis: Seungmin is the guy you told your ex-boyfriend not to worry about. Turns out he had reasons to be concerned after all.

Heads up: Kim Seungmin x Fem! Reader, friends to friends who fuck/potentially lovers , some angst pertaining to Reader's previous relationship with Chris, Seungmin being a menace, dirty talk, hair pulling, mild biting (f. receiving), nipple play (f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), degradation (f. receiving), mild edging (f. receiving), slight dacryphilia, unprotected piv sex, Seungmin being a bit of a douche and slandering Ex! Chris, Possessive! Seungmin, implied breeding kink (it's not stated outright but, it's definitely there) and creampie.

I will block you if you are minor and have no easily visible indication of your age on your blog if you interact with me in any way.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"You look terrible," Seungmin comments when you let him into your apartment, making himself at home on your couch.

"Wow, thanks. It's nice to see you too Seungmin and, Happy Valentine's Day," you respond dryly, shutting your door and trying to remember why you let him into your home in the first place. You'd much rather continue to wallow in solitude.

"It's true. Go take a shower and change while I get us some food. You've been moping for long enough, and you need to come back to the land of the living," he says, not missing a beat and opening up a food delivery app as though you'd just go along with him.

"It's been two weeks. I think I reserve the right to still be sad about Chris," you say, your heart clenching uncomfortably at the mention of your ex-boyfriend's name. At least you're not crying anymore. That's progress.

"Sure, but you can't just keep yourself locked up in your apartment forever. Also, shower. Now. We'll talk when you're finished," he says, glancing up at you and leaving you with no room to argue with him. Seungmin always seemed to know just how to get you to listen to whatever he said. It's really aggravating.

"Fine," you sigh in defeat, trudging your way towards your bathroom and choosing to ignore the triumphant smirk you know is on his face right now.

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You try to steady your breath as the warm water from your shower head washes over you. You'd never give him the satisfaction but, Seungmin was right. A shower definitely made you feel significantly better.

When you step out and take a look in the mirror, you're startled by your appearance. You look like a ghost of yourself. You probably looked worse before taking a shower and actually doing some skincare, but you still can't help how caught off guard you are by how unlike yourself you look. However, making yourself feel worse isn't productive.

You opt to start getting dressed after moisturising your skin, throwing on an oversized shirt without a bra and shorts. Pointedly ignoring your reflection this time around, you leave your bathroom feeling better than you have in admittedly a long time.

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"There she is," Seungmin says when you come into view, a genuine smile painting his face. Your mouth waters when the smell of the food he ordered wafts over to you, luring you towards your coffee table where Seungmin spread it all out.

"What did you get?" You ask, settling beside him. Your eyes taking in the various dishes in front of you, saliva pooling in your mouth.

"Comfort foods. Dig in," is all he says in response, grabbing a dish filled with what looks like rice cakes. You don't notice his careful gaze watching you as you grab a few slices of pizza for yourself and eat away, his eyes softening considerably.

A comfortable silence fills the space between the two of you as it always does. You'd be lying if you said you didn't appreciate him being here. Your apartment had been lonely the past few weeks, and having someone here feels... nice.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks quietly, his eyes meeting your surprised ones. Seungmin isn't pushy and invasive usually. You know he's happily drop it if you said no, but talking about it might help, and you know he'd listen. Really listen.

"We just... I think we just wanted different things. I think we're both in different stages of our lives, and it wouldn't have been fair to make the other wait. It was mostly mutual but, it still sucks, you know?" You say softly, swallowing around the lump you can feel building in your throat.

Seungmin pulls you into a hug before you realise what's happening. Strong and supportive and just there. You return his embrace, food forgotten on your table as you try your best not to completely fall apart. It's been so long since someone else has touched you. You close your eyes as you let his warmth and scent wash over you, hands fisting the fabric of his shirt.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I just thought it might help," he mutters against your ear, his breath making a shudder involuntarily run down your spine. It takes a moment for you to steady yourself, "No, it's okay. That's the gist of it, really. He'd get a little jealous sometimes too but, it wasn't the biggest problem we had."

"Jealous? Why? You were nothing but loyal to him," he responds, confusion clear as day in his voice.

You could never lie to Seungmin even if you tried.

"He was jealous of you. Of us. The friendship we have," warmth filling your face as the confession spills out of you.

Seungmin pulls back then, his warm, wide eyes meeting yours as his hands rest on your shoulders, "Jealous of me?"

"Yeah, I mean even Jisung always makes jokes about how the two of us are closer than most. I think it got too much for Chris,"

"Jisung's an idiot," he retorts with a roll of his eyes, and you actually laugh. You can't remember the last time anything or anyone managed to get even a chuckle out of you.

"You're not wrong there, but my point still stands. I think you made him feel threatened, in a sense," you say, and an unreadable expression crosses his face. He seemed to be contemplating something.

"Were his feelings unfounded?"

It's your turn to be surprised because Seungmin's question catches you completely off guard.

"What?"

"Did he have a reason to feel threatened?" He asks with so much seriousness that you don't know what to say for a few beats, your mind totally blank. Seungmin is a good friend. You care about him deeply. You also recognise that he's kind, funny, great to banter with and attractive, but you've managed to keep those thoughts mostly to yourself over the years. Or at least you think you have. Maybe Chris caught onto them more than you realised.

"The look on your face is telling me maybe his feelings weren't unwarranted,"

His voice breaks you out of your thoughts. The small, smug uptick of the corners of his lips is both irritating and unnecessarily attractive. "No- I- I would've never done that to Chris."

"I know you wouldn't have, and I think he knew that too, but I think your hesitance to even answer my question is pretty telling," he says, his eyes taking on a knowing gleam.

You flounder with your words once more, denial at the implications Seungmin is making hot on your tongue, but you know you'd be lying.

"I'm flattered, really," he says, far too amused with how flustered you are and privately just relieved to see signs of the old you.

"You're so annoying," you huff, lightly shoving his chest with your hand and rolling your eyes to distract yourself from the tension you feel in the air. It's probably all in your mind anyways.

"Yeah, and you want me," he retorts with a full-blown smirk this time around, his usually warm eyes taking on a more mischievous glint. All you can do is stare at him. Kim Seungmin leaving you speechless at his audacity.

It's made all the more worse because he's not wrong.

Your heart rate picks up considerably when one of his hands moves to cup your jaw, his thumb lightly brushing your bottom lip as he watches the movement intently. He looks like he wants to eat you alive.

"I can't say your feelings aren't reciprocated," he mutters lowly, the drop in his voice making your insides clench around nothing. Embarrassment running through you at how easily he manages to effect you.

"I- huh?" Is all your murky mind can manage to come up with at the moment. Resisting the intrusive thought to just take his thumb in your mouth.

The grin he gives you is mean and condescending, not the typical smile you've come to know and expect from your friend. It only makes the ache so much worse. He let's out an amused, throaty chuckle before speaking, "Do I really have to spell it out for you? I want you too."

Seungmin seems to be trying his utmost to make your heart stop beating in your chest today.

"But, I need to know you're okay with this. Actually okay with this. I would never take advantage of you when you're vulnerable. I care about you too much to do that. If you say no, we can stop right now and pretend this never-"

You cut him off with a kiss to his pretty lips. Pouring years' worth of want and frustration into it, your hands desperately pulling him towards you and swallowing his startled noise. The kiss is messy and uncoordinated, but you can't bring yourself to really care when you finally have him like this.

One of Seungmin's hands weaves its way into your hair, giving it a slight tug and grinning against your lips when you gasp at the sting. Taking the opportunity to lick into your mouth while his other hand runs along your waist, toying with the bottom of your shirt. You barely have a chance to breathe, let alone think with how thoroughly he's kissing you.

Eventually, oxygen does become a necessity, but he doesn't relent. Moving from your likely bruised lips and kissing along your neck, his teeth occasionally grazing the skin there in a way that makes you melt further into him.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to have you like this," he utters against your skin, pressing his teeth a little harder against a weak spot he found during his exploration. His hand ghosting over one of your breasts, stilling the air in your lungs. Between his words and his ministrations, trying to remember how to speak is becoming increasingly more challenging.

"I've wanted you for s-so long too," you breathe, too wound up to care about bearing so much to him at once. Your response seems to shatter whatever fragile resolve Seungmin had because you soon find yourself on your back. His hands impatiently shoving your shirt up as his mouth finds yours once more.

He swallows the mewls you let out against him as his hands touch your breasts for the first time. Giving them experimental squeezes to gauge your reaction. You find yourself arching into him when his fingers toy with your sensitive nipples, a gasp flying from your mouth when he gives them a particularly hard pinch.

"I didn't think you'd be such a masochist," he muses, licking at your throat once more as his fingers and hands toy with your tits to his hearts content. His hardening cock pressing against you through your flimsy shorts.

"I didn't think you'd be such a menace," you fire back, but the breathlessness in your voice dispels any potential venom in your tone. You cry out when he bites down on your neck harder than before. Not enough for it to really hurt, but the little pain it provides is enough to worsen the sticky mess in your panties and, you involuntarily grind yourself against his sweatpants covered cock.

"You have no idea what I'm capable of. This is nothing," you're not sure if that's a promise of things to come or a threat, but either way, you're not complaining. Before you can think to retort, his hot, wet mouth envelopes one of your nipples. Licking and sucking at the sensitive nub in a way that makes your toes curl. All of this is only worsened by one of his hands slowly trailing down your body, fingertips lightly grazing your abdomen until they reach the top of your shorts.

But because Seungmin seems to enjoy seeing you suffer, his hand stills there. Toying with the waistband of your shorts and every brush of his fingers making the ache you've been feeling for what seems like ages more unbearable.

"Seungmin," you whine, thrusting your hips up towards him in search of any sort of relief, your hands tugging on his hair desperately. The pop that rings out when he releases your nipple borders on obscene, his eyes alight with desire and mischief once more.

"Yes?" He asks, sounding far too pleased with himself as his fingertips trace featherlight patterns just above your shorts.

It takes everything in you not to huff in frustration at this incredibly aggravating man, but you have a feeling that would just emboldened him. "Please touch me," you beg barely above a whisper, the throbbing between your thighs currently more of a priority than your ego.

"I am touching you," he retorts, pressing kisses to the tops of both of your breasts to prove his point and snapping the waistband of your shorts against your skin.

You might actually hate him.

"No- I mean, please touch me here," you respond, grabbing his hand and sliding it down the front of your shorts until his fingers brush your more than likely ruined panties.

You can't help the smugness you feel when you see the ever composed and teasing Kim Seungmin falter for once. His lips parting and eyes becoming lidded when his fingers experimentally touch you, taking in just how wet you already are.

The unadulterated want on his face makes him look more attractive somehow. A strangled gasp flies from your lips when his fingers run along your clothed slit, hips twitching into his touch at each brush of his calloused fingers on your swollen clit.

"You're soaked already," he groans against your skin, sweat dotting his forehead and making his hair stick to it as he meets your gaze. His fingers continue to touch and brush and run along you in a way that quickly drives you to madness.

"Seungmin, please. It hurts. I want your fingers inside me please please plea -" your begging is cut off by two of his fingers pushing your panties to the side and sinking into you to the knuckle, his lips finding yours again and leaving your mind spinning.

His fingers stretch you out in a way you haven't felt in some time. Your own not nearly as long and thick as his. Your eyes roll into the back of your skull when he starts moving, curling them inside of you in a way that makes an embarrassing high-pitched keen spill from your lips that's he's more than happy to swallow.

"So fucking wet and tight," he groans, increasing the speed of his fingers when it seems like you've adjusted to the stretch. His fingers quickly finding that spot inside of you that results in your walls gripping his fingers harshly because of fucking course he would. He just had to be good at everything. He opts to continue kissing and licking and nipping at your neck as he fucks you brainless on his fingers. All you can do is lie there and take it, moans and mewls and keens mixed with incoherent words all you're able to offer in return. Your hands moving in a frenzy. Unsure of whether they want to tug on his hair or grip his shirt to steady yourself.

"Are you gonna cum just from my fingers already? Isn't that a little too pathetic, y/n?" He asks against the shell of your ear, the harsh tone of his voice making you gush on his fingers more.

"Oh, you like it when I'm mean. Aren't you a cute, little, brainless slut," he groans, tugging your lobe with his teeth as his thumb presses against your clit. His body keeping you in place as your body bucks against him at the sensation, crying out when he rubs hard circles against the hypersensitive nub.

Your orgasm is so close that you can practically taste it. Sparks building at the base of your spine and spreading throughout your body as Seungmin's fingers, mouth and words push you closer and closer and closer to the edge.

Which is why it hurts all the more when Seungmin abruptly stops and pulls his fingers out from inside of you. Your eyes fly open, and you meet his dark ones, a devilish grin spread across his face as he leans away from you. Sadistic pleasure coursing through his veins as he takes in your dishevelled state.

The tears build in your eyes make his cock throb, "Seungmin, why- why'd you stop? I was close," you ask and the whiney edge to your voice tempts him to sink his cock into you right then and there.

"I'd much rather feel you cum on my dick," is all the answer you receive. Complaints dying on your lips as Seungmin tugs off his shirt impatiently, your hunger eyes taking in his bare torso as he makes quick work of his boxers and sweats as well. Seeing him completely naked infront of you makes you realise just how empty you are, panting like an animal in heat at the sight of his long, flushed cock smearing pre-cum against his tense abdomen.

"Well, what're you waiting for?" He asked with a raised eyebrow like you're a moron. It takes you a moment to catch on to what he means, your own hands tug off your skewed, ruined clothing in record time. Seungmin takes a moment to admire you spread out before him. Thighs parted and, your pussy swollen and leaking with arousal all for him. His cock pulses as he takes it in his hand and slowly runs his tip along your slit, the corners of his mouth lifting up when your hips buck up into him everytime he brushes your clit or teases your entrance like he'll sink in any minute now.

You think he might just make you lose your mind.

"Seungmin, please," you beg so desperately that your voice cracks in the process, but you couldn't care less. Nothing but, the desire to cum or feel him inside of you or, both really, taking over.

"Since my needy slut asked so nicely," he responds, pushing the head of his cock inside of you. Both of you moan at the feeling, Seungmin gritting his teeth as he pushes inch after inch inside of his cock into your tight, hot pussy. His forehead rests against your shoulder when he finally bottoms out, your quiet mewls and his harsh breathing being the only sounds heard in your living room.

Your nails dig into his back when he gradually starts moving, his cock hitting spots inside of you that render you borderline delirious. "You're so fucking ah tight," he rumbles against your throat, grabbing your thigh and angling your leg over his hip in a way that makes him slide impossibly deeper.

"Seungmin, yo-you feel so good. So de-deep," you babble out, a few stray tears falling down your face as he picks up speed, his balls slapping harshly against your ass with each one of his thrusts and his tongue lapping at the sensitive skin of your neck.

"Yeah? Is my little cockslut already going stupid on my cock?" You noticed it earlier but, the possessive edge to his voice makes you clench around his cock harder. All you're able to do in response is whine and moan, nodding your head in an attempt to answer his question.

"Aren't you cute and pathetic," he breathes unsteadily against your skin, groaning at the way your walls try their best to get him to cum. "Didn't take you long to let me fuck you, did it? How long have you fantasised about this?"

Shame intertwined with arousal knots in your gut because he's right. It didn't take him long at all to have you spreading your thighs for him. You're honestly amazed that he can speak coherently right now. Your own cognitive abilities failing you as you try to muster up words to answer him.

One of his hands grips your jaw once more and forces you to meet his intimidating gaze, his cock stilling inside of you completely.

"I asked you a question. I expect an answer," god, the commanding tone in his voice really shouldn't turn you on as much as it does.

"I-I've thought a-about you um like thi-this since we f-first met," you manage to stutter out, trying your hardest to focus with him nestled so deeply inside of you.

"So, it seems like you can speak," he says, resuming his unrelenting fucking into as though it's nothing. You can feel your orgasm building once more, hoping against hope that he'll let you finally cum this time around. You're not sure what you might do if he doesn't.

"That long, huh? You should've said something. I would've happily fucked you dumb on my cock a long time ago. No wonder Chris was jealous," he muses, but hearing Chris's names throws you for a second, surprise colouring your face.

"Oh, come on, y/n. Don't give me that look. We both know that you were thinking about every time he so much as touched you. I bet you touched yourself to thoughts of me too" he whispers into your ear, his hand moving between your bodies until his fingers eventually find your clit. He wastes no time in rubbing fast circles against you, low groans filling your ear as you clench and gush around him.

Even if you could respond, you're not sure what you would say. Seungmin's sheer nerve leaving utterly speechless. Fortunately for you, your orgasm slams into you before your mind can dwell too much on the jarring accuracy of his words. Your hands cling to his broad shoulders for purchase. Your body convulsing harshly underneath his as he continues to fuck you through your mind numbing release.

"Fuck," he moans, lidded eyes taking in your purely blissed out expression and his hands flying to your thighs as he chases his own climax.

"Your pretty pussy is gonna make me cum, baby. Gonna fill you up with my ah cum. Fu-fuck, gonna cum inside you. Make you take it all," he groans deliriously, picking up speed even more all while the obscene sounds of your wetness and skin slapping against skin rings out. "My good girl. My cumslut ah fuck," is the only warning you receive before he stills inside of you to the hilt. Moans and curses spilling from his mouth as his hot, thick cum paints your walls white. His hips jerking against yours from time to time as he rides out his release.

The two of you catch your respective breaths. The sticky mixture of your climaxes slowly leaking out of you but, you're still too hazy and thoroughly rung out to bring yourself to care at the moment. Your fingers playing with the ends of Seungmin's hair as he plants soft kisses against your shoulder and collarbone.

"Hey,"

"Mmhmm?"

"Happy Valentine's Day," if anyone asks, your heart definitely does not stutter in your chest at the smile he gives you after wishing you a happy Valentine's Day. Not at all.

#kim seungmin smut #seungmin smut #stray kids smut

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