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#literally just crack
padfoot0216 · 1 year
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Okay but hear me out (I say this as if I’m about to say something completely normal, but I’m not. None of this is normal) TK and Carlos would both use Tik Tok. They would make POV videos except they are just real things that have happened to them. No one can tell if they are joking.
TK and Carlos’s Tik Tok adventures
- Carlos would start it. Something like “POV Your boyfriend almost set your kitchen on fire (he used to be a firefighter)” And it would show TK in the back trying to put out a very on fire pan.
- TK would retaliate by creating his own Tik Tok. “POV Your boyfriend fell down the stairs, and now you have to provide first aid” Showing Carlos sitting with and ice pack in his head and TK holding a first aid kid.
- They just become more unhinged after that. Everyone in the 126 follows them and so does the 118.
- POV Your boyfriend is in a coma after getting shot by a 10 year old ( TK in a hospital bed)
- POV your boyfriend is apparently just “your colleague” seriously TK
- POV your boyfriend brought a flesh eating lizard into your house and now your scared for your life (He says he wasn’t flesh eating but they found him inside a wound. So excuse me if I don’t believe him)
- The 126 each have their favorite videos
- Owen enjoys watching what his son gets up to but is also kind of concerned for his well being after seeing some of the videos
- POV your a former drug addict and your boyfriend brings drugs into the apartment (a bottle of Tylenol sits on the counter”. This is one one of the videos that concerns Owen.
- POV your boyfriend is crying because the lights were to loud (he swears he’s neurotypical)” Owen is once again concerned about his son
- Marjan enjoys the chaos of the videos.
- POV your dad and your boyfriends dad teamed up to stop an arsonist. They did catch him but now you don’t have a house (so many hoodie are gone) *pile of rubble in the background*
- POV your boyfriend won’t stop crying about his hoodies so now your spending your life savings at 3am to buy new ones
- Mateo is mostly confused and the more he watches the more confused he is
- POV your the bpd (note: try and tell me TK doesn’t have borderline personality disorder) boyfriend and your having a breakdown in the kitchen
- POV All you want to do is sleep but your boyfriend keeps talking about a couch
- Judd is genuinely concerned about both of their well beings
- POV your boyfriend just got kidnapped by a homocidal maniac but refuses to get therapy *carlos is crying in the background
- POV your boyfriend just went into a three day coma and now refuses to go to sleep (yes tk sleep is needed for human survival)
- Paul is entertained by it all
- POV your boyfriend is out with Cooper, whats so great about Cooper, I’m a cop Cooper
- POV A fight breaks out between the police and firefighters softball teams and your boyfriend won’t let you fight and steps in to fight for you (he tells them he’s a cop, it doesn’t work because they are also cops and have desks right next to them. He was invited to one of there childrens graduations. He apologizes to Brian his name was Grant)
- Nancy kind of wishes she never started following them
- POV you wake your boyfriend up at 2 am to tell him you want to write your will (he asks if the lizard is back, not sure why that’s the first thing that came to mind but ok)
- POV you were held captive by a lady who apparently loves the gays (she may want me dead but at least she’s not homophobic)
- Tommy just wants an explanation to it all
- POV Your boyfriend just became a paramedic and was kidnapped by a group of criminals (his dumbass tried to play hero and got knocked out)
- POV your boyfriend blames himself for the death of a criminal (it wasn’t his fault) and is now spending all of his time trying to solve the case (Grace is enabling him.) (I have the first aid kid on stand by)
- The 118 had there own questions and concerns, but the main one being how they know so much about their lives they just met them.
- POV Your boyfriend won’t stop talking about buddie and the couch theory. (Send help)
- POV Your boyfriend is crying because you wouldn’t stop talking about how we aren’t the main show (it’s because we’re in Texas)
Welp that’s it. I’m normal. I swear
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fandxmslxt69 · 6 months
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hi hello I see you casually dropping matty fic ideas in the tags?? care to share with the class???
IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED EHEHEHEH
OKAY disclaimer while I cherish and love Matty this fic idea isnt inherently romantic based! it CAN be read as something romantic and i totally have an alternate ending in my mind with smut and shit but IT STARTED OFF AS JUST FUNNY STUFF
i'm more of a Frank girl anyway so Matt to me did start off as "i want to fuck him" but then it became "he is my best friend my catholic buddy." i KNOW i emphasis him being catholic a lot but ts just funny in my head to base it off friendships i have with my Christian friends (im muslim btw) so its just a funny little rivalry that started and is just For The Fun okay.
ANYWAY FIC IDEA LMAO basically there's like a mission right. and reader kind of has connections in the sense that...she works alone, she does her own thng, but....she's popped up with other teams before and is close with Matt (in my mind, its just a friendship that started purely on matt "where are you going on a Friday" Murdock and reader "to pray at the mosque???" to Matt "OH MY GOD !!!! no way" Murdock. BUT for the fic it's not the case thats just a funny little side note lmao.
anyway so Matt has a mission somewhere whatever i dont have details but he needs someone to be his Fake Wife (he takes marriage very seriously and this idea bothers him) but reader is like "hey. we're friends, we're close, we share a lot in common we're friends i'll help" and he's like "oh sick okay at least someone i like being around"
OG idea to which i daydream abt is literally just a crack fic of Matt and reader getting "married", going on with the mission and its just crack. insanity runs through their little house. its chaotic its crazy its a constant screaming match between the two of them and really it was just me going "what if. i lived with Matt "Good Catholic Boy"Murdock as his fake wife What happens then. and it escalated
its just silly and For The Laughs. so its just very platonic cute fun stuff buuuuuuuuut i will not lie to you i HAVE thoughts of some very unholy things about this man. im a SLUT for marriage of convenience tropes so i really couldnt stop myself lmao. I DONT KNOW the idea of them having sex and getting close and Matt's like "oh my god oh my god finally i've been so in love all this time" and reader is like "he's doing this for the role. married couples have sex usually so this is just for the role" (she's a little dumb its okay lmao)
anyway yeah. maybe it develops into a friends with benefits situation, and after the mission its like "well SHIT cuz i actually like you and divorcing just seems...wrong ? even if- even if we yknow this didnt start out as a "real" marriage" and its just an angsty angry confession and they decide to PROPERLY get married (no right or wrong way to get married btw but im extra and i like huge ass weddings sorry) and they start dating after that lmao
like religion so clearly states (thats a JOKE btw im KIDDING lmao)
anyway yeah. there's a LOT of variations to the idea. one minute its just a regular platonic and then its smut and then its just a regular female reader and then its not and then its silly crack and then its angsty self discovery and yeahhhhhhh BASICALLY.
basically i feel a lot about him.
DOES THAT MAKE SENSE LMAO
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beybuniki · 3 months
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best friend with social anxiety
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blluespirit · 3 months
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there are so many amazing and powerful benders in atla but what i love about zuko is that whether or not he can use his bending in that moment has zero (0) bearing on how much he’s going to absolutely kick your ass. no bending? that’s fine - he’s got swords. no swords or bending? that’s fine - he’s literally just going to beat you up. if you’re REALLY unlucky then you get all three. as a treat.
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shellxrls · 2 months
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bestfriend!jj x fem!reader and they go to the beach and jj gets a boner from seeing u in a bikini
you’re practically prancing around the chateau with your tits spilling out of your bra, fabric struggling to accommodate and letting fat slip out and crease at the corners.
jj can’t help but go love-struck everytime he sees you, eyes immediately gravitating to your tits while he grows red in the face, letting out a dry cough and blaming it on ‘dehydration’ when he catches john b eyeing him for his pervy behaviour.
“dude c’mon,” john b groans, smacking jj in the chest and redirecting his attention, “it’s like you’ll see anything with tits and you can’t even bother to put it in your spank bank for later, at least have the decency to wait until she’s gone before you bust man.”
“dude, john b, i do not know what you’re talking about, i'm just admiring a beautiful woman right now,” jj defends, holding his hands up and shrugging in surrender.
“jj, you have half a fucking chub right now.”
jj’s head snaps downward, and he rushes to cover his dick, protectively placing two hand over his crotch before staring john b down.
the brunette sighs exasperatedly, “look, bro— you might as well just go jerk one out in the toilet right now, but don’t come back until you’re ready to stop creeping on her.” with that john b turns, dropping his head in his hands and leaving jj to stand there admittedly defeated.
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zoe-oneesama · 1 year
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Ladybug has far more patience than I to listen to Chloe’s new annoying catch phrase and not punch her in the face.
Based on Yamai:
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Ko-fi | Patreon
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floweroflaurelin · 9 days
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Caught up on enough videos to understand what minecraft sos is all about 👍
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strongermonster · 5 months
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one of the funniest news things in canada that always tickles me is the ongoing war between magic mushroom shops and the police.
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this is the absolute height of humour to me right now
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quick-catton · 3 months
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BARRY KEOGHAN FOR BUMBLE.
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s0fter-sin · 20 days
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i need ghoap frantically making out against a door finally taking the leap on their feelings. need ghost grinding against soap, expecting to find him just as hard as him, only to feel nothing
and in all his wisdom and experience, he concludes soap was tortured and never told him
he’s trying to think of a delicate way to say he understands, that he’s been through it and it doesn’t change anything about how he feels (and who the fuck touched him so he can hunt them down and rend them limb from limb)
meanwhile trans!soap’s just trying to find the best angle to grind his cunt on ghost’s thigh
just it never even entering ghost’s head bc he’s never known a trans person but he has met plenty of people who’ve been tortured - himself included - so of course that’s his logical leap
soap takes off his shirt and he sees his top surgery scars and ghost asks if he wants him to kill the one who did it and soap just hums like, “actually, man did pretty good, they healed real well,” and ghost’s just teary-eyes with awe at how well he’s coping, “looking on the bright side, that’s my johnny.”
imagine he thinks johnny was fully castrated but sees he’s determined to still have a sex life with him so he buys packers and straps to help him bc hell yeah healing and soap’s just like, “holy shit i’ve never had such a thoughtful partner before, such a sweet man, lt.”
#he a little confused but he got the spirit#its so good bc it can be super angsty of ghost really dreading whats been done to his sergeant and trying to make it right#or just go full crack treated seriously and have fun with it#i love just completely oblivious ghost#in any military context hes the smartest guy in the room#he always knows the play and has more experience than anyone#but stick him in the normal world? man is Lost#ghost just thinks hes had some kind of reconstruction surgery after being tortured and accepts thats what johnny looks like#bc hes never seen a pussy before#it takes years for soap to actually come out to him bc he just never thought to#hes seen him naked theyve literally slept together what else is there for him to say#then he shows him like a family album or something and ghosts just like ‘why arent you in any of these i only see girls’#and he just goes ‘hang on a second’#soap gets one of his sporadic periods one night and panics a little thinking it would weird ghost out or remind him that hes not cis#but ghost just thinks its a normal part of such a thorough reconstruction that hed bleed sometimes#and doesnt question it when soap grabs a pad out of his drawer bc ‘thats such a good way of handling the discharge my johnnys so smart’#just really supportive ghost for the wrong reasons#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#soapghost#ghostsoap#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod
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halothanic · 10 days
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you could have anyone you want, why would you wanna be with me? you know i'm nothing special—
redraw of this piece from 2020, because i've been enjoying playing the update with my bf so much and i couldn't resist using it as a warmup
take my sebastian playlist from that time while you're at it!
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wrinkleintime · 6 months
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enterprise text posts: featuring t'pol my beloved <3
+ BONUS
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was a toss up on which screencap to use for girls night! so you get BOTH. ft. archer hanging with the girlies in the labyrinthine catacombs beneath the city <3
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the-final-sif · 6 months
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I need to hop back into my transformers bullshit for just a moment because I don't think they've had much interaction in canon, but I think it'd be really really funny if Tarn was actually terrified of Starscream.
Like, I dunno if MTMTE/IDW canon has confirmed Starscream's immortal spark for that particular series, but I'm going to assume it carries over. If so, it'd make Tarn's power basically useless against him.
In my ideal headcanon, Tarn got sick of Starscream's shit at some point and went against Megatron to try to murder him. He tried to do this subtly using his voice only for it to 100% not work even a little bit. He would've had this whole build up where he got Starscream alone and was attempting to be a dramatic bitch about the whole thing and build up to the murder and then-
And then it just doesn't work and there's a really awkward pause where Starscream is looking around kind of expecting something to happen when literally nothing does. Tarn is trying to keep a normal conversation going now while also attempting the murder again and again just for it to literally do nothing. Eventually Starscream gets sick of him being weird and walks out judging the guy.
It'd be so fucking funny particularly because Starscream having an immortal spark is generally totally unknown, so Tarn would have to assume that Starscream had found some way to render his ability useless, which is terrifying. Tarn is now extremely worried that Starscream somehow had a spy and found out what he was planning to do ahead of time. He might've even been able to get something into Tarn's head somehow to know his plan this well. Clearly that level of genius must be part of why Megatron keeps him around. Tarn was a fool for having attempted to disobey, and Starscream was clearly not a problem he could solve like this. What if Starscream reports this clear disobedience to Megatron? Tarn just tried and failed to kill the second in command! Starscream would have every right to demand his execution if he so desired, or save this as blackmail!
Tarn is just out of his mind spinning conspiracy theories and getting super high levels of paranoia about Starscream. Just doing whatever he can to not have to be in the same place as the guy. He runs under the assumption he's being blackmailed by Starscream for his attempt and does what he can to not cross the seeker.
Meanwhile from Starscream's perspective, Tarn showed up and had a very weird conversation where he kept raising his voice at random times and then nothing happened. Then the guy freaked out and got even more weird about it. He has no idea why this happened. He has no idea that Tarn is hiding from him. He thought it was weird and stopped thinking about it after a few days. Starscream's minding his own business and mostly forgot about this entire thing after two weeks meanwhile Tarn is having a mental breakdown about it for years.
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sketchy-tour · 4 months
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He has!!! ARIVED!!!!!
He's here he's here he's here!!!!!! Safe and sound!!! We sat down and did some coloring together!!!!
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And also made sure he met his new neighbors! Had a nice chat with my childhood stuffed animal! Asking all about what his new home is like. And of course, he had to meet Boober Fraggle!
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Watched some Winnie the Pooh together! I think he really liked it. I hope he felt warm and welcomed in my home. A nice and cozy first day here!
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context <3
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dvd-play3r · 5 months
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can’t wait to see all the todd ingram x wallace wells doomed yaoi angst start to show up in edits, fanart, and fanfiction on ao3
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