#like its fine to talk about specific things

[shesmore-shoebill]

we've talked about the scenarios where angela would lose her composure at seeing amanda (s&b outfit and billion dollar gf dress as examples) in the rpf world we've collectively built, but now i wanna know what specific scenarios about angela amanda would completely lose her cool/have a reaction from? (raspy voice like in the tapple video? seeing angela's tattoo? could be anything!)

Oh, fucking love this question, thank you for it. Lets see.

2 things: 1 Eternal disclaimer about this all being in RPF universe/my own hc's about characterization I've decided on, not the actual people. And 2 This is not an exhaustive list of the ways I think this could go/the only ways these can work, Im just tossing out fun options that come to mind that I find internally consistent.

Okay logistically, anything to make Amanda uncharacteristically lose her shit over Angela has to be at least slightly uncommon/unexpected. So as much as I'd like to say something like "Angela in a tank top /sleeveless shirt", stuff that happens regularly needs to have an extra edge to it to explain Amanda losing it this time and not the rest of the time. Or at least losing it more.

So that said:

- Raspy voice is so fucking fun, yes please. So much potential...

One possible route is Angela loses her voice semi-regularly (unfortunately) due to starkid and moon goon and also just regular yelling, and maybe Amanda thinks she's used to it, (and normally tries to offer her honey or checks to make sure she's fine). But she's used to Angela's being voice completely gone, and one day her voice is more raspy/rough instead of being gone gone, and Amanda's normal affectionate concern is completely bowled over by her 😳😳😳 reaction to it, because oh fuck. OR, Amanda is used to the raspy voice (so she thinks), but Angela makes a sex joke or a flirty joke In That Voice and Amanda is SLAMMED by the thought of the same comments/voice in a VERY different context and Completely Ceases To Function. Bonus if its on camera/during a shoot of some kind so Angela notices the initial reaction and plays it up for the bit and Amanda is just. Not volleying it back properly. Or is volleying it back with WAY too much energy and everyone else is in the room like. 😶👀. The tapple video... the tapple video with all tge sex jokes and angela's voice being gone could be a VERY fun starting point for a fic.

- Once again falling back to the thing I've been gleefully chattering about. Amanda being flustered by Angela being the one to initiate/flirt. Angela being really forward/aggressive with flirtation, or bring Very assertive with her flirting, or just. Commanding. I think Angela flirting aggressively when she's all decked out in some ridiculous costume or putting on a goofy voice or leaning into the absurdity is something Amanda is used to/can handle. But, lets say, Angela not in a completely ridiculous character, or Angela playing a character thats only a mildly exaggerated version of herself, and being very forward/flirtatious/assertive towards Amanda. And for Amanda its suddenly like Oh fuck oh god oh shit . Because it doesn't feel like a ridiculous character like Angelo or some mustachio'ed old man being horny, it feels like Angela leaning in and oozing confidence and dropping petnames and it should NOT be working on her but it VERY MUCH IS. So much potential. Sooo fucking funny.

- Angela dressing up hot. I haven't sorted out the most fun consistent headcanon I want for this but IF we were to lean into Angela not dressing up as often I think its. So fun. To have the alternate dynamic of Angela dresses up hot for an event (Shourtney engagement party?) and Amanda sees her and nearly fucking swallows her tongue and her self control falls out of a fucking window. I know that's the go-to Angela flustered by Amanda dynamic but I think it could be fun the other way too. 👀

- This might be. me. lmfao. shining through but if we went the tattoo route we could also go an Arms™ route.... tank top Angela.... I'd have to think about it, to explain why it ESPECIALLY gets to Amanda, and maybe the tattoo is why.

- If we want to lean into the more explicitly spicy options and kind of mirror the S&B Angela flustered headcanon..... Angela shows up wearing something like a choker or something and Amanda. finds herself thinking. Many things. Many many things.

- This idea has JUST come to me so I havent thought through the logistics of it yet but. Angela showing up with a hickey or something and Amanda should be professional and normal about it but. But. But. (this could be very funny, very horny, or angsty! Or all three!)

Pausing here bc this is getting long. But. I fucking love thinking about the hc's for this, thanks for this ask. and HEY HAPPY PRIDE lmfao.

#i didnt intend to take long enohgh to answer this that we ended up in pride month but HEY HERE WE ARE #ugh this is so fun though. 👀 i love imagining the logistics of flustered amanda..... #amanda lehan canto #angela giarratana #amangela #smosh rpf #ask tag #smosh hcs #smosh au #as always with these things people are free to take or expand or modify these ideas as they see fit but if/when im writing fic you might se #some of these ideas shamelessly lifted from my own answers #anyway. amangela thoughts. happy pride.

[kuntypop]

concept: american kpop fans realize they are not the center of the universe and not everything is about them!! im being a bitch but i dont care kpop fans in the usa are SO obsessed with the idea kpop is obsessed with them and only them. No other markets. And they are altering everything for /americans/ trying to appeal to americans and you know what? sure. it does happen. America is a big market for entertainment and some companies have been clearly trying hard to break into the US for a long time now. but also did you just miss the part where kpop was trying to break into the Japanaese, Chinese and South East asian markets for much longer than they've been doing anything with the US? Do you even know about Boa? About all the early groups that were sent to Japan or China? Are you aware that Kpop groups have been doing concerts in Australia and Europe for a good long of time now? Are you aware there's a lot of kpop fans in South America? a lot of you groups have been leaning into that with songs clearly influenced by music happening there? Will there ever be a point where Americans realize that kpop has been trying to go GLOBAL for a long time now- When they say global they aren't secretly meaning USA and nowhere else. You aren't the center of the universe.

#it's just annoying im sorry #like its fine to talk about specific things #or groups that were shilled heavily in the US at their own expense etc etc #but this concept kpop only cares about the US is so funny #like they care about money actually and if they stop making money in the us that'd be it lmao #kpop #discourse

[godsfavoritescientist]

well hold on, if we define a character flaw as any limitation a character deals with, regardless of whether it's something Morally Wrong With Them or not, then Ford's paranoia counts as a character flaw since it does in fact negatively impact him and the people around him. Let me use better wording here: I will die on the hill that Ford's paranoia is not a moral failing.

#'i'll die on this hill' one second later: un-dies on that hill on a technicality #godsrambles #one way in which i probably differ from ford is that i could not care less about winning any arguments all i care about is being accurate #people are right about a lot of fords character flaws actually. the part they are wrong about is which ones are Moral Failings #and also people misinterpret his motivations and intentions behind things. but the flaws themselves? sure yeah people can identify those #unpopular opinion but i think ego is fine on its own too depending on how you define ego. case in point: papyrus. yknow the skeleton #it only becomes a problem when you're putting other people down. which i dont think ford is guiltless of but. the others do that too #idk sometimes when other people go 'omg... ego moment :/' im like 'a chance to hype eachother up! yay' i dont assume im being looked down o #unless thats specifically demonstrated to be happening #but the thing that kills me is that stan constantly puts other people down. but since he doesnt idk have an ego or talk weird its fine?? #i very much agree with dipper when he replied to mabel with 'ford doesnt make fun of me all the time like you guys do' #and like once again. to each their own #some people see that level of making fun of people/being made fun of as just friendly banter and thats fair enough #but i really appreciate that ford isn't like that

[moeblob]

What Deacon thinks: what did that mean? did he want me to wear a collar too? why else would he mention my neck? i mean, if he /asked/ me i would wear one but he didn't so would wearing one be weird?

What Ymber meant: It's nice to be near someone who isn't tethered to this world to serve it with a physical reminder for all to see.

#my characters #this just in ! thats why all the deities in the plot have collars and a chain ! #its because THATS THEIR DESIGNATED I AM HERE TO HELP THIS WORLD SYMBOL #they cant remove their collars and thats fine by them - its a constant reminder that they exist to serve #deacon really shouldnt get as much crap as he gets in canon for being weird cause the deities are just a different brand of weird #like its not deacons fault that apparently you can say nice neck with no underlying desire #but he cant say hi would you please possess me i want to know what its like to have someone else in my body #like thats really not something you should pin on deacon YET EVERY deity is like wow what a lil weirdo #he also just really wants to please ymber so if ymber asked he would definitely do whatever #on the flip side i need to point out that deacon very specifically doesnt ask ymber for things nor does he pray for things #and it drives ymber up a wall because this is his favorite human who wont ask for anything and he isnt a psychic #he doesnt know what deacon wants or needs and its infuriating cause he exists to serve humanity #and yet this ONE GUY wont let him do things for him #this is very important and i cant believe i mentioned it like a month ago to someone and today #i received gift art of these two and i may never recover #its so perfect and its ymber just looming over deacon telling him that he can pray about anything to him #its also worth pointing out that when i was telling the person about the whole ymber begging for a prayer #its because he realizes that after all this time hes never had a single prayer from deacon - not before nor after the hire #so hes like oh well thats odd hmm #and then begins to talk to deacon like you know people pray to me for lots of things #and deacon looks at him unsure of what this is leading to - did someone offer a weird prayer? ask a weird thing? whatst? #and no - its just ymber saying that people will pray for wealth or an item #or they will express frustration if something is lost or broken despite it not being ymbers fault so deacon just stares #he has no idea what this is going to end on really so he points out 'well you do like to think you break people' #and ymber just ASDFASDFSADF STOP OK NEXT POINT people pray to me to bless relationships with happiness #and thats fascinating so deacon is like wow can you actually do that? #and ymber is so stressed as hes like i mean kinda i can simply amplify the positive emotions in gestures #like if someone gives an item out of love then its blessed #he also admits that he cant mask insincerity or malice so those feelings are not hidden nor amplified #and deacon just is impressed bc that is actually VERY cool

[moonsidesong]

misophonia is so stupid like hi sorry i cant listen to that song anymore. yes i know i know the melody is really great and catchy and i love it but i noticed the Triangle is an ever present instrument throughout it so the song also makes me feel as though i am dying and i want to tear something to shreds. sorry

#bri talks #misophonia #do any other misophonics have. like. a thing about specific instruments or am i just nuts #bc other Jangly instruments generally are fine but i just legit cant handle the triangle if its in a song for any longer than a few seconds #this post is about bogards hfjone and also a very very large chunk of the pokemon mystery dungeon rescue team ost #frowns

[britneyshakespeare]

do you ever feel like people only like chick-fil-a so much because they're not supposed to

#i've only had their food like twice in my life (for the longest time i didn't live close to one) #like i don't get it #text post #i don't see ppl talk so fondly about other fast food restaurants in the same way #well i mean sometimes. some people do. if they're genuinely like fond of one for some specific personal reason #but like the certain endearment it's just normal to express about chick-fil-a... i don't get it!! #and im just supposed to grit my teeth and not bring the word 'homophobia' into it #again im not like accustomed to their food admittedly but the few times ive had it. its NOT that great #maybe this is also a northeastern thing for me. maybe it's different where u grow up #i see more locations near me popping up nowadays but perhaps if u live in the south it felt more like your upbringing #idfk. i know i'm not spouting an unpopular opinion on tumblr by saying Chick-fil-A Bad #but when i see normies where i live being excited about new locations popping up im like. hm. well we all know right... #ur fine w sending this message to your queer friends and family? ....... ok #yeah go get that disrespectful ass lemonade then

[granny-griffin]

y’all keep saying “the universe” when you mean “God”

#like its fine to not believe in God I can respect a difference in opinion #but when you start talking about the universe as something that can see events and make choices that affect our lives in response to them #you are no longer talking about inert matter #honestly I’d also be ok with “the gods” etc like. this doesn’t have to be about christianity specifically #and I get that its also a joke most of the time #but also. why did we invent another phrase for a thing we already have words for #hey! griffin!

[neolxzr]

Literally a genuine question no ill intent

What do you like about Aira? As much as people are absolutely adamant Akira is projecting (I really don't think he is (I'm not saying Akira is innocent) I just think he's trying to address the prejudiced thoughts the average Japanese person will have on the Ainu) Aira's weird comments and behaviour to Hiiro have been there since day one. And I also think Aira being the one who says all this is because he's supposed to reflect the fans and the average Japanese fan probably isn't that educated on the Ainu + there can be a good few racist enstars fans...

I'm not trying to sound heated about this I'm just coming from a genuine place, what appeal is there in Aira?

Also, as much as the Aira fans are talking about blaming Akira, I feel like there should absolutely be a focus on Hiiro right now considering that comment was... yknow said to him. I just think we should actually be talking about the Amagis considering that comment was intended to discuss the Amagis and their culture and the discrimination they go through.

i had someone ask me a similar question once but not in the context of all thats happening currently so you can read that here if youre inclined

buuuut what made me like aira so much in the first place was honestly that his concept as a character is really funny. i made a post a long while back that went into the funny meta jokes that you could make using aira as a character before i really knew much about enstars at all. having a character in your idol series that loves idols and canonically reads fanfic about them is just a funny concept in general. and as i continued to read more he continued to be funny and annoying and endearing (his little mini interaction with midori comes to mind immediately. there is something wrong with him)

also i tend to gravitate towards characters that give me like. little sibling energy. i love having a favorite little guy to dote on

but afterwards what really drew me to him was the main story!! thermometry specifically comes to mind (ouuugh,,,,). his feature scout stories are also great and so is feather touch! i wont like. go into detail really cause my blog is covered in me talking about aira already

his dynamic with hiiro is one of my favorites too, especially in mainstory. their dynamic isnt JUST aira says shitty things to hiiro and thats it. their relationship develops really far to the point where aira admits that he needs hiiro as much as hiiro needs him. they're young and inexperienced and kind of codependent as they're trying to keep themselves from going under in a sort of cutthroat industry. i think thats really neat. their relationship is really sweet to me and aira is a great tsundere type of character. he regularly is shown to actually like hiiro a lot as mean as he can be to him sometimes i.e. here. and you know the whole holding hands thing (which they also fucked up in the climax story but Whatever)

theres also this. which i think about regularly. the hiiai shipping fuel is vast

and additionally i think aira has some really great relationships with other characters too, alkaloid especially. feather touch develops his relationship with tatsumi a lot and its one of my favorite aira moments. i couldnt find my screenshots for this one but basically aira gives tatsumi his unlocked phone (something VERY important to aira since hes a little screenager) and it shows tatsumi just how much aira trusts him and he realizes how important aira is as a friend to him. being someone with a history like him aira's friendship is sort of new to him and it helps them both grow

he loves his friends so so much and he’s had a positive impact on all of alkaloid. he is its heart after all

but in any case i'm not going to like, defend myself for liking aira. i am aware that the shitty stuff has been there from the start but i've said something similar in the past that was like. aira isn't real and he cannot take accountability for what he says. he's a character written by real people who doesn't have any control over how he acts. so i guess that's why when i think the writers write something i dont think he would do or say in my own personal aira opinion i can sort of brush it off as just bad writing.

and not in the sense that i dont recognize that enstars sucks, because it does. enstars can be terribly racist sometimes and not just when concerning aira, and thats important to talk about (i.e. the orient cards, the king of thieves cards, etc). but at the end of the day the most important thing to recognize is the people and company behind the game as well as the real people who play the game and are affected by it. and not like, the specific characters in the game. cause they didn't actually do anything or feel anything you know

#cryn answers #anon #enstars #media analysis #im a miraculous ladybug fan im used to pretending that the thing i like is better than it actually is lmfao #was including sources for what im saying too much?? #anyway i didnt even touch on airas own experiences with racial discrimination #i dont think its written perfectly so thats why i didnt talk about it but its an important aspect of his character too #and an important part in his place in alkaloid #also i hope i dont come off as rude or upset in this anon #i appreciate you being respectful #but also im a little tired of talking about this ill admit it #i enjoyed rambling about aira again im just like :( that its cause of all the discourse and whatever happening right now #blegh #i think its kind of like. i mean if you only hear little tidbits of what a character is like through twitter screenshots #youre not gonna have a full picture #and i think thats how it is for a lot of enstarries with aira #and thats not a jab at anyone i dont know jackshit about like. mama or undead or fine or akatsuki. and thats fine #theres too many characters for me to know everything about everyone #but with aira specifically his only character trait to the people who dont produce alkaloid is 'the racist one' #and that sucks #but anyways. thats all i have in me for now

[frodo-of-the-nine-fingers]

damn the guys were right about the mountain goats after all

#pov you see some people talking about some guy and it reminds you of one of your mutuals header (hi avery) and so you look up the line #because its a damn good line and then your like oh of course its a mountain goats thing that tracks #and then youre like what the hell might as well listen to this incredibly specific song scenario that is in no way related to the character #you were thinking.but ISNT it and now im crying about being told it's real sweet to grow old its fine #the mountain goats #i guess #its still going to be another 1 week to 6 months before i allow myself to go crazy about them so

[marsixm]

ocd rly sucks sometimes bc i swear my paranoia just shoots me in the foot with my personal life so bad

#its like this weird combo of anxiety and favorite personing #that makes me fixate on if one specific person whos opinion i care about #like hates me or not #i currently am struggling to shake a specific paranoid delusion that cropped up last night #even tho its....... SOOOOOO unlikely #but even still #its the kind of thing if id just like #get out of my own head. would probably be fine #like #so fucking often #i just wish i could act normal enough around people to not care #its like i feel like i hide my true self from the people i want to be real with the most #and im like man if i was just acting like. normal/chill we'd be best buddies and everything would be fine #but instead i have to be fucking insane #its just hard and weird and complicated bc im so used to keeping things secret and to myself and not being able to explain things #i dont even know how to fucking talk to people sometimes #i just want to make real ass friends man #why is this so hard

[tiredstressedemotionalmess]

me, every night for the past three weeks: oh im feelin good rn! and i had a good day today!! im definitely not gonna lie awake filled with anxiety and dread over my future tonight :D

me, lying in bed 20 minutes later looping famous last words: by talos this cant be happening

#its like im fine literally all day qnd then i start to get ready for bed and the Dread sets in #like its an actual physical feeling in my stomach and i just suddenly out of nowhere have to hold myself back from crying #i literally go from perfectly happy to on the verge of tears in an INSTANT and idk whats causing uty #it #like i know broadly ehat the causes are but idk whats causing the specific switch at night #am i tired?? is it just bc im tired??? bc its not consistently at the same time and most of the time i dont *feel* tired #or is it just like. i knoe im going to bed so i know im gonna be alone with my thoughts and so they all come and hit me at once??? #idk idk idk i just know i hate it and i want it to stop i want everything to fucking stop #id say i need a minute to breathe but really ive been using the past four months as my minute to breathe & thats part of the fucking problem #because ive been putting this all off for so long bc its so overwhelming but now theres so much igotta do and theres real tangible deadlines #so i cant keep putting it off but i DO and its just making it all even more overwhelming and my parents arent fucking helping #but its not even their fault because im chosing not to talk to them about this bc talking to them about it makes it all real #and i dont want it to be real yet im not fucking ready for it to be real yet i just need a goddamn minute TO FUCKING BREATHE #i wish i could freeze time and just give myself a day where none of this matters #actually a days not long enough i think i need like. two weeks. two weeks for me to get my shit together where none of this bullshit exists #and i can just do whatever i want and not have to think about deadlines and decisions and the fact that this is all ive wanted since the #7th fucking grade and now that its actually here i cant fucking stomach the thought of it being real because im a goddamn coward who cant #fucking commit to anything or get themself to DO anything and i know its not really my fault bc i probably have adhd and i get #knocked off my ass with a migraine every ither fucking day but i still feel like i should be more prepared for this than i am #and im not prepared and im not ready and i cant get myself ready because i cant do things like this myself because i dont really want to be #doing them at all #like sure! the bitch can write a 400+ page fanfiction no fucking problem!! they can find time for that but a college essay?? even finding #schools to apply too???? dont be fucking ridiculous they cant even get half an app done in the time it takes them to write a two 6k chapters #delete later

[fayevalcntine]

Taking aside whether everything we've seen is fully true or not (though I subtly doubt that since the writers have mentioned they will revisit a lot of the previous past scenes in season 2), the way Louis narrates is limiting on its own for both Lestat and Claudia. Omitting entire years' worth of time and only giving Daniel (and us) the barebones information through vital moments still leaves me with a lot of questions regarding Claudia in particular. Because sure, Daniel HAS the diaries, but who's to say they haven't been tampered with more than Louis even lets on? And specifically, when it comes to the 10 years overall after Claudia comes back, we see no diary in Daniel's vicinity. The only time we do see some is at the end of episode 7, of which one contains Lestat's final words, the other is about their trip to Europe after the murder. That leaves us with only Louis as the main source of information for this time period, but Louis isn't above solely giving Daniel scenarios in order to place Claudia or Lestat in specific roles through how he experienced them in the past.

Case in point, episode 6 has no killings from Claudia. We don't see her hunt, not even to go after a man or stalk him, we definitely don't see her kill, despite all episodes before or after that containing some explicit killings with her. I say this because to Louis, Claudia was his nurse/knight/protector/sister during this particular period of time. And even subconsciously, he ends up painting her as such to the point where we also don't even get much information about Claudia and how she even traveled in episode 5? We only get one piece of information about it with the train scene, but we still get absolutely nothing about how: 1) she even came to reading about vampires, 2) how she managed during her 7 years alone, 3) any basic information about her plans beyond her catching a train for going outside of New Orleans, or even about how she learned languages. The only information we even get specifically is regarding her horrible encounter with Bruce, but again, this later ends up serving more as an apparent parallel to Louis' later situation with Lestat than it is even about Claudia, who suffered through an assault.

I would also argue the same thing in regards to the 6 years they spent alone together, as well. Louis wants Daniel to think of Claudia in a better light, he makes her out to be his savior and the only person that seems to want better for him, yet at the same time leaves out any further details about the years they lived with each other (and not with Lestat) in Rue Royale after he recuperated? Why? And this isn't even to argue that Claudia may not have been as perfect, rather that Louis cuts out so much context as to how they were like with each other after she came back that I end up getting only so much information about Claudia solely when it comes to how it affected or was connected to Louis.

Louis is telling the story here, and even with Claudia's diaries (which Daniel now knows Louis has tampered with), we only end up seeing what Louis wants us to see. This is why I hope season 2 changes some of this because I would really like to just know more about Claudia and her own feelings regarding all the later situations with her and Louis.

#interview with the vampire #claudia #louis de pointe du lac #any time I think about Claudia and how we still don't get enough context about her and what SHE felt I just to a little crazy tbh #like yes I know she was Louis' nurse/sister/knight in shining armor/protector and Lestat's apparent murderer but WHAT ELSE #did she imagine how she would meet her own companion when she talked about travelling to these European places? #how did she get the idea to start doing research for them? how did she move about in at least 4 different eastern states? #what were her feelings about Louis specifically taking back Lestat and then dismissively telling her to 'do more' #like even with her diaries I feel like I only have a half-painted picture of her #and I NEED more #i want more because if she's truly dead that means that Louis is fine with tearing out pages of her diaries which are likely #the only things left of her?? #idek where to start with how fucked up that is in order for HER diaries to be torn up #in order for Louis to stick to his own side of the story and say its final

[vitamin-zeeth]

For my English course this year I wrote an essay on the debate of fine art vs contemporary art and I haven't reread it since I sent it in I wanna see if I can find this shit cause I have no clue what I ended up stating as my opinion

#it was crazy how many people i mentioned it to immediately started shitting on contemporary art #like id explain what i meant by fine and contemporary art and the majority of people would instantly talk about how ridiculous #they thought contemporary art was and how it wasnt real art and shit #my english teacher told me i actually changed his mind about the subject and like ultimately all i did was fairly compare the two #i didnt favour either one i gave them both pretty much equal time i think lots of people just havent actually considered contemporary art #at any length before yk they just go well this is art cause its pretty and theyve painted a thing and i know what it is #and this is pretentious bullshit because i dont think its pretty and i cant tell what its supposed to be by looking at it #i went to a modern art museum recently with my family and there wasthis one exhibition that was an indoor garden thing #and they all kinda went whats the point of that its just plants it doesnt even make a picture and moved on pretty fast #but all the plants had little signs next to them explaining what they were and why they were significant and oh my god #it had a kind of motif of the hanging gardens of babylon but it was mostly about war specifically palestine and the effects the war has had #fuck man. i spent a solid hour in there that shit really fucked me up. i love art. #there was another room filled with traditional south american stuff i think it was? #there was this fascinating film and all these coolpaintings and models but there was also a tiny little boom you could read #and it was of mayan love charms and holy shit Tumblr wouldve loved those i think i have a picture of my favourite page #it was like 'i want to join myself to him. i want this man to be my other half' #mmmm. anyway #tag essay #i love love love talking about art i could sit and talk about art for literally hours #wet floor sign

[savageday6]

♡

#starting to believe that maybe all this while i've been punishing myself by isolating myself from people who care abt me #like there have been times when i felt that friends just didnt care. also been times i felt too ashamed to ask for help or seek company #but i think i just gotta give myself grace like . i'm human. it's fine to seek platonic connection n a listening ear. it's Normal #anw so!! i met my best friend for yoga (for the first time!) yday n we talked SO MUCH!! we talked about life careers sexuality relationshi #i also told her about smth that has been plaguing me for two days. specifically my ex ahgkhgjgjns n . talking about it really helped me #what a shocker!!!! that talking about your worries n feelings helps!!! ksggfjsnjkgnjkndg #n i learnt so many new things about her... we usually meet in a group n it's always just a roulette of quick life nuggets #but yday i realised that i never really found out what she's really been up to. i've not had a one-to-one conversation with her in ages!! #thats crazy considering that we're such good friends.... omg. n so it really made me see how much i craved that connection #n how much i'm tormenting myself by isolating myself and depriving myself of the joy that i tend to get from deep social connections :( #n i think maybe it's time to start putting that past self who was too ashamed to reach out for help behind me #idk its been really nice talking to an old friend n being 100% comfortable u know?? it made me realise how much i missed deep connections #my point is i've missed this!!!!! maybe i should do it more!!!!! #personal

[kil9]

I wish when ppl talked about eating healthy they actually meant eating healthy, and not a roundabout way of saying "being skinny". what's considered "health food" is food that doesn't make you fat, no matter how harmful it actually is for human consumption. and what's considered "unhealthy" is what makes you fat, no matter how nourishing it is.

like. to eat healthy you have to eat.. enough. and this means also eating carbs and fats and sugars, sorry !!! this also means sometimes you will become fatter because this is what your body wants to do to store nutrients

like if a skinny person is eating handfuls of flax seeds (very toxic to humans and potentially lethal. ie not healthy) ppl will go yaay health food<3 skinny legend !!! but if I (fat) am eating a burger with cheese and tomato and lettuce and onion (has basically every food group inside, and protein, iron, calcium, vitamin c, etc. and will give me energy for a good portion of the day) ppl get disgusted because this is socially designated Fat Food :'(

like. get over it. in your perfect ideal future where everyone eats healthy, ppl will still be fat !!! get over it ! and people will also eat things that straight up ARE unhealthy because they want to ! and you still have to get over it :(

#99.txt #last time i tried to make this point i got hated on :p #this shit is so imgraned in our society its UN. REAL. #ppl piss me off when they talk about america specifically. and how bad it is #these ppl will unironically be talking about all the problems with america (which there are so many) #and be like ''yeah its so bad over there 🥺 the racism. the lack of healthcare. homelessness. and also people are fat !! 😰'' #LIKE. DO U THINK MAYBE ONE OF THOSE THINGS IS NOT AT ALL COMPARABLE TO THE OTHERS. HUHHHH #its so insane to me #im just so annoyed aaaaaaaaaghaggsh shut up shut up !!!! skinny ppl shut up for EVER #its like the older i get and the more confident i get in the way i look the more i realise what BULLSHIT it is #that ive been made to feel awful and ashemed of myself for so many years..... for WHAT ???? im literally hot ???!??!?!? #your stupid skinny society was keeping me from the truth for so long 😭😭😭 the truth that i am a fine piece of ass #and its also insane that half of these skinny instagram influencers are like. malnourishing and poisoning themselves to stay skinny #BUT THIS IS CONSIDERED HEALTHY ????? #if anyone needs to be saved from unhealthy eating its them 🤨🤨🤨

[kavehater]

I wish I could inject pasilyo into my brain so I can have permanent happiness

#There’s this specific part of the song #It srsly alters my brain chemistry #Anyways #i hate tumblr sm #Idk like I Gen hate being on here sm #No matter what account I make no matter if I tell ppl about it whether I don’t tell ppl I just hate this place soooo much #Like if I have a following it sucks because it’s rlly lonely if I don’t it’s still lonely and then if there’s nobody at all it’s lonely #Loneliness is what got me to discord boy so like :D #The fact I am genuinely missing him sm I’m gonna krill myself 😻🙏 #Also I think I hate talking to minors cause these kids be letting themselves get groomed all the time I’m so tired of seeing it #The creep in my course is being so weird to Raisa who is a minor … I can’t help but think it’s all my fault … I invited her to the pharm gc #To show her how messy it was …. #I didn’t expect her to follow and accept requests of everyone … #Anyways I just am so annoyed. Like I wish I could have one person just one where I can be confident in being their no.1 but every time I th #Think I’m maybe somewhere high up on someone’s list of important ppl I realise I overestimated my position even tho I’m rlly self conscious #And being myself down over that. Also I still hate Eid. I hate Eid sm. How do ppl genuinely enjoy Eid. Idk if I’ve ever been excited for Ei #It’s like I’m just suddenly getting more sick of ppl by the day. I Gen don’t like talking to ppl at all even tho I used to rely on talking #To others like its sustenance now it’s just such a hassle to me because I’m so sick of being unimportant to literally every single person I #Have ever known. Literally everyone except maybe dahlia idk. the only person who has never gotten mad/snapped at me o is dahlia #And knowing my luck that will soon be taken from me too. Anyways good riddance to tumblr i loathe this site and im sick of the mind games #All the time from just existing on here. Gen makes me feel ill. I’m so sick of that girl I like and sick of everyone. The only time ppl car #Is when I cause a scene. And ykw atp I loathe being showed sympathy and pity for these sorts of posts because it just feels like a big joke #Cause why couldn’t you just care when I was fine. Why do you ONLY care when I’ve had enough of your bad behaviour. How does one make someon #Like me go mad with all these things #Istg if I come back to this dumb site whether to this acc to the tora one or my other account everyone has permission to beat me up. #dora daily #Tldr;I HATE ppl and everyone ever + I’m just sick of pretending like everyone doesn’t suck cause how can ppl be so insufferable intolerable #Insane horrible in every way and ppl like them. How do they live with themselves when they’re this aggravating. Every day I hate ppl more #Because their mannerisms their everything is just so embarrassing. #Essay tags 😻😻😻