#just give me a new brain

[airxiem]

As if I had enough of a reason to have to frequently check information about what kind of PTSD I have.

Post pandemic stress disorder is still a thing at least online and there's dissociative PTSD. I'm just in a triangle of checking in and out against my will and sometimes I feel like I'm just as 2 dimensional as a piece of paper. Then, I can't remember hardly anything about my personality before covid. I can't even connect with the memories. I mean, if there were like studies being done on this stuff I wouldn't be sitting here annoyed. I looked and there's like 2 in United States. I can't even go sit somewhere and let them pome at me and get paid for it.

#ptsd #cptsd #dissociative ptsd #pist pandemic stress disorder #ppsd #just give me a new brain #idgaf #clinical trials #studies

[ruporas]

trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)

#trigun #trigun maximum #nicholas d wolfwood #vash the stampede #meryl stryfe #milly thompson #millions knives #ruporas art #type of shit ive been on lately bc ive been playing an obsessive amount of hades 2 lmfao… ofc imstead of drawing fansrt for hades #i channel that energy into trigun?😭 SEE.. the thing is. i am ALWAYS thinking about a trigun game… like an action story game #it is rotating in my brain 24/7 and now after 7billion years i finally pick up a video game #and the inspiration sparked. obviously this is just a mere mimic of an existing media... but im thinking about the plot of max now #executed differently between mediums… webbing a new retelling of the original story as game mechanics allows you - thinking of the #new roles the characters would take. like wolfwood here is not Constantly by vash’s side but he will show up once a run to clear out an #encounter. shows up seldomly at home base to make gifting difficult... an existing companion and still journeys on his own. for more #relations options merylmilly will also have occasions where they separate so vash can speak to them individually - the gungho are not bosse #most of them get the roles of giving “boons” i think.. BUT ANYWAY thats me reimagining trigun into hades. now imagining trigun into an #ORIGINAL video game.... ough... ohhh....guhh... I WANT IT SO BAD!!!!!!!! #this was just a fun exercise... im thinking about doing more but i think i shouldactually draw some hades 2 fanart first

[malpracticinghomosexual]

જ⁀➴

#been rewatching the xfiles #and having thoughts ans feelings about Them #it’s not really clear in this piece but just know that fox mulder is a butch lesbian To Me #i also messed around with some new brushes and i really like them ^-^ #i saw this reference pic and immediately thought abt like 4 dif parings but these two are giving me brain worms #evvy does art #the x files #x files #mulder and scully #fox mulder #dana scully #sculder #agent mulder #agent scully #the x files fanart #fox mulder fanart #dana scully fanart #x files fanart #mulder and scully fanart #sculder fanart #artists on tumblr #digital illustration #illustration #drawing #procreate #msr #msr fanart

[reineydraws]

ah, 🌸 youth 🌸

#mishanks #akataka #dracule mihawk #red hair shanks #shanks #akagami no shanks #one piece #op fanart #one piece fanart #i tried something new with the colouring lol #anyways they have been giving me sooooo much grief bc they are soooOOOOO difficult to pin down and draw #drawing them is just constantly playing it by ear 🙄 but i love them sm #the brain rot is so real with them rn #was gonna queue this and then i was like hm. nah. inconsistency is a tumblr perk so i will revel.

[banemaus]

no flash photography please he’s trying not to get caught

#mine #creepypasta #jeffrey woods #jeff the killer #jtk #tried somerhing new. lmk if its good #if not i will just end it #DISCLAIMER: WILL NOT BE ENDING IT #his nose is giving me brain damage but i cant do much about it. sry jeffy

[crystallizsch]

this was kalim's idea

#they were NOT invited by jamil #it was ace who did #i don't think kalim was even aware of the basketball game until ace invited them #they're giving attention to the guy who doesn't want it and not to the one who DOES want it #[— #twisted wonderland #twst #twst art #scarabia #jamil viper #kalim al asim #twst yuu #twst yuusona #★ my art #(💜) yuusha #(💜) scarabiyuu #—] #this was inspired by a webtoon i was reading aajkdsdjskal #i said i was going to take a break #but the little gremlin in my brain said no and i spedrun this piece #then the battery on my stylus finally died while i was drawing and i have zero replacements atm #i think the universe was trying to tell me something #anyways every now and then i try a new style of drawing #and sometimes i'm just pleasantly surprised #like wtf i've never done this before #i love it i should do it more #sorry for rambling in the tags aldjlfjsklfd #twst is rotting my brain

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS #REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT #NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS #THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS. #ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of #another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY.. #i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her #idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had #when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them. #but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore. #but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think #i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow. #ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that #AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE #I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME #THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE #WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL #in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad #this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks- #-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl- #-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi #gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show #i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!! #anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM

[shittyakechiweekly]

p3 protag and more fiddling around with akechi's metaverse outfit

#akechi goro #p5 #persona 3 #persona 3 protagonist #I finished watching a p3 lets play and ough it scratches my brain so good #i want to play fes and the reload so bad #ive also just been reading a fic that combines p5 and p3 #and so they have been sitting together in my head #lets ignore the fact i havent finished p5r and I also just started p4 a few weeks ago #i need p3 now #honestly if i ever get my hands on a copy of p3 fes or reload i wouldnt be surprised if it became my new top game of all time #just the THEMES and the MUSIC and the AESTHETIC i just lfkjdfhkjdhjdh #give me now #it scratches my brain #anyways im totally normal

[scarycranegame]

thinking about. transfems. and trans girls. and how cool they are.. literally if you're a tgirl or girl-adjacent transgender person i want you to know that. you are so wonderful and beautiful and kind and talented.. we need you on this site now more than ever, and im so sorry about literally everything that's happened here. none of you deserve to be treated like this; you deserve so much better, and i'm sincerely hoping that other people (especially people with power to instate significant change that affects a lot of people) will understand this and work towards making this a safer platform for all of you. please don't let anything that's happening right now on this literal hellsite make you think that you're any less than amazing; i love all of you so so so much <333 please stay safe out there!!!

#not fandom #let's get serious #transgender #trans #trans positivity #trans rights are human rights #transfem #trans girl #trans women #trans pride #literally whenever i find something new that i love so so much and i look at who made it #its always a trans girl. always #how are you all so awesome at literally everything #also this includes nonbinary transfems!!! that should go without saying #everyone whos transgender and feminine in any way at all. i love you so so so much <333 forever and always #fuck photomatt this will always be the trans people website #on that note seeing so many people posting transition pics in light of this incident is. really inspiring to me #it gives me hope that someday i'll look the way i want to as well #just... i love trans girls. it cant be put into words how much hope you all give me just from existing and surviving #please keep doing it. please keep existing and surviving #its so so so important that you live #please remember that #sorry if this post is kind of incoherent my brain is. mush. because im thinking about how cool trans girls are #scary crane rambles

[shower-phantom-ideas]

I want to believe danny finds it more annoying to use children swears.

Vlad uses food

Mr. William Lancer uses book titles

And Danny can say things like “oh golly this is on heck of a situation”

At first it started as it starts with any child. Wanting to test the limits of the rules and then he noticed it annoyed some adults. They can’t tell him to just swear :3. So he kept it. As he gets older he does curse like normal but not very often. Like it’s rare. Imagine his coworkers the first time he drops the “f-bomb”

Do you think they are shellshocked (thats a good handsoap) or do you think they scold him.

#danny phantom #imagine this if you will in a batman universe #bruce is having war flash backs to I think it was jason as robin #and danny is just annoying all his new siblings except for oh fuck I can’t remember who nightwing is #oh hell I have been gone that long? that I can’t remember nightwings name #anyway hes giving jason secondhand embarrassment and duke is helping him get sillier swears #steph thought it was funny to watch bruce and the others squirm but after a while it’s grating on her nerves #WHO THE FUCK IS NIGHTWING #SHIT #funny I mentioned shit cause I am making this post only cause im in the bathroom and out of tp and im stalling #my brain keeps trying to tell me nightwin is tim??!? who I know is redhood #HOLY FUCK HIS NAME WAS DICK

[goatpaste]

Huge SA warning for the next chapter. I really do hate that Araki keeps falling on using that as a shock factor/writing crutch twice to the same character now. Though doesn’t the recent chapter kind of confirm Dragona is trans now?

yeah no iv already read the chapter so i knows what up

but for anyone else who hasnt read todays new jojoland chapter PLEASE read this

but im also like

anyone with a brain alreadY knewW she was trans, ARaki im already in her corner, I already support her, you don't have to keep brutalizing her to make her compelling or whatever

im so sick of the transmisogynoir, pick out something else to do with Dragona for the love of god!!!

araki the last 3 parts, seeing a woman and asking if anyone is going to do gross sexual harassment to them and NOT waiting for an answer

#the only good thing was #i love young dragonas lil outfit i think it is very cute her lil headband :) #also her and jodios matching Jo buckle/charm #cuuute #also im like.. id love to know more about their parents background #i dont think were gonna get it because i think the angle of this part is siblings #but im like we know their from new jersey which is where sbr ended give or take #and that Joseph went back to that area with lucy and had his family there #so presumably Barbara grew up there #but like.. did she meet her husband there #or is this a holly incident were their dad was from hawaii and they moved there to be with him #or did they just decide to move there... #TO ME MY BRAIn im like mmm #i have thoughts but probably dont make sense #but im looking im looking soo hard

[rocketbirdie]

destiny intersects with the ruined reactor...

little details!

#here i go establishing new questionable habits... #'oh yeah lemme just uhhh create an entire soundtrack to accompany my art! lmao no biggie' #but DUDE masashi hamauzu is a legend and his music sounds SO good in the ffvii soundfont ok #it's irresistable. i don't have a say in the matter. my brain says 'ok music time' and i am at its mercy like cloud giving in to jenova. #ALSO i learned so much about the soundfont while recreating the reactor section!! #you know that subtle triplet beat 'train chugging' sorta sound in the mako reactor theme? #it's actually acoustic bass plucks getting cut off SUPER short in rapid succession! #the same track uses a very deep pitched reverse cymbal sample as a spooky atmospheric 'breathing' noise. #idk man i just admire how creative og ffvii is in general with its limited tools. #ok the nerd urge has passed i'm good now #just kidding. gongaga has me in a chokehold. i'm obsessed with this place. do not talk to me about it because i will not shut up. #ffvii #ff7 #ffvii rebirth #cloud strife #my art <3 #my music <3

[iraprince]

Hiii, i love your stuff and kinda from a distance really look up at you for, in my perception, being able to express yourself without giving a fuck. Thats sick dude, Im so so afraid, of absolutely everything, its nice to think like i might grow into someone less apologetic of my existence. Nice to see people just being yknow

hey, thank you, this is really really nice. the secret that is probably not a secret is that i am also deeply afraid a lot of the time lmao -- but less than i used to be, and in ways that feel less stifling and self-suffocating, if that makes sense.

like, it used to be "i'm scared that if i express myself the way i want to, everyone will find me obnoxious, so let's just sand those edges down to be safe" -- now my fears are more like "now that i'm expressing myself in a way that feels natural and real, i'm afraid that it's all stupid/vapid/not worthwhile or meaningful" (<- specifically abt my art) or "i'm happy that i talk and act the way i want to now, but what if it makes me impossible to befriend," etc etc etc. which still feels bad and puts me in a funk a lot of the time but at least it's a fear that comes After/in reaction to doing stuff, rather than a fear that STOPS me from doing stuff, you know? like, it's evolved into a kind of fear that's less in my way.

anyway. i believe you'll experience something like this, because wanting to grow is the first step of growing. the fact that u hope or wish for something different means you're already on your way. to fewer fucks!! or at least distributing the fucks u give in a way that serves u better

#stuff like accepting that i'm reserved and i'm not very accessible via messages. #or that my online tone isn't very bubbly and it's weird and uncomfortable to force it. #i stop letting fears about that shape my behavior ('i'll look mean or snotty so let's force markers of Friendliness to avoid that!!') - #- and instead act the way i want to and then trade it in for new fears that come After the action. #also a good reminder to give urself is that if ur fear is abt how other ppl perceive u (as 90% of mine is personally) #u really... can't actually control that. and being very very anxious abt it all the time is usually ur brain throwing a tantrum abt not-- #--having that control. bc it is understandably very scary that u don't have that control #as much as it sucks + is terrifying the truth is the only thing u can do is ask urself 'am i behaving in a way that i'm proud of' #'am i behaving in a way that's in alignment w my values + what i think is important' #bc if the answer to that is yes and somebody hates u or is deeply offended by ur existence anyway. well. literally not ur problem #but obv being at peace w that is way way easier said than done + requires tons of practice and will take. probably. years. which is fine #i am stuck with myself. i can either contort myself forever trying to be someone everyone will like and find totally nonthreatening and- #inoffensive and in the process exhaust myself totally and never feel safe or natural myself. OR #i can say okay. so i am a kind of prickly guy with stern and drab speech patterns and close to no social energy. and i think i can still be #-sexy and fun this way. and it is up to other ppl to figure out if they can agree w me on that #ANYWAY enough rambling for now. just another one of those things i think abt a lot so i have a lot of ready-made sentences abt it in mind

[soupbtch]

ummm. my fic is done.

#I mean it still needs a bit of editing but like after almost four months #the hell (writing) is finally over #it's clocking in at around 61k words rn and im tired #time to relax ((cry)) #actually you know what. fuck it I'm gonna overshare about this a bit. #I've never written fic before #and besides that - this is the first thing I've sat down to write seriously in about ten years #and ten years ago I was just writing poetry and papers for college #(I don't mean 'just' in a bad way - I only mean that it's been a very different experience for me personally) #very protective over this fic in that it's been sitting in my lap and in my brain for a few months and I don't want to give too much away #so I've deliberately been vague with the marketing of it. because I want people to read and be surprised and experience it firsthand. #and I know it's supposed to be self-indulgent and writing should be about the process and not the results but #I hope people read it??? I've poured my soul into this thing. a bit. a lot. and I'm a simple creature who craves validation. #it's very personal yet at the same time I feel like I haven't done anything new or groundbreaking which. okay it's self-doubt saturday so. #I should ignore that feeling. anyyyyyyyyway. #I hope to post the first chapter in two weeks. crossing my fingers that I don't abort mission before then aaaaaahahaha #also comparison is the thief of joy etc etc etc #danny.xls #danny writes

[myymi]

tails: and that's halloween!

knuckles: surface people have strange customs

tails: kinda, but they're fun!

knuckles: being frightened is fun?

tails: to some people. what type of holidays did the echidnas have?

knuckles: ours were focused on our world. the planet, the stars, the emeralds, etc.

tails: explain!! i wanna know!

sonic: im surrounded by nerds

knuckles: not our fault you're uneducated

#hhhggehebdjd #they'd infodumo their history to each other and no one can convince me otherwise #sonic's enjoying it too he's just being dramatic #someone please give me a tails&knuckles fic before i have and start a new wip #miles tails prower #sonic the hedgehog #tails the fox #sth #sonic #knuckles the echidna #team sonic #brain and brawn #sonic and tails #sonic and knuckles #tails and knuckles #unbreakable bond #dynamic duo #they're brothers your honor

[zebratimw]

Spirit animal SQH

#svsss #shang qinghua #but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but #but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee #also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but #I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg #oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left #I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something #or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird #LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm #I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either #I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself #eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it... #I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up #I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa #man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong #cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk #its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment #with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig #and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down #but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀 #irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living... #just the ol regulars yknow? #and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want? #I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what? #whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate? #so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it? #that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications #and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly #man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk