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waitinginthedarke · 5 years

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He’ll be wrong, for you.

A BTS/Kim Taehyung Fanfiction

Summary : What happens when you take on Kim Taehyung… Type: Mafia!AU (BTS)

********************Prologue********************* Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Chapter 6

‘Have you got any coffee?’

The question is asked in a gravelly voice, the sight of the warehouse presenting itself to you through a slightly blurred, and exhausted, vision, but you still manage to seek him out in the darkness, his omniscient smirk being illuminated by the single table-side light that separated the space between your two chairs.

‘And why might you be asking that, Angel?’

A spark of irritation flickers in your stomach at the pet name, tiredness weighing down on your responses to him, but you’re too spent to really acknowledge it with how much you desperately needed caffeine, and deeply despised your need to sleep.

‘Taehyung, have you got any or-‘

‘Its 5am, Y/n. …maybe instead of drinking coffee, you should consider getting some sleep?’

The way he cuts you off forces a biting reply to the forefront of your tongue, but before the words can leave your lips, you’d caught sight of the worried expression he was watching you with, your eyes slowly following the length of his arm till you see the way he’d reached over to gently cover your hand with his.

‘I don’t need-‘

‘The guys went to bed almost two hours ago, beautiful. And I’ve spent the past two hours watching you try not to fall asleep in that chair, despite me telling you amusing stories about the gang.’ He points out, a wry smile curling the edges of his lips, despite the deep bow in his brow, one that grows larger as he gets elegantly to his feet and takes a step toward you only to come to kneel at your feet.

‘Whatever it is that’s brought you here tonight, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. …but what I do want you to do…is to forget about it whilst you’re here; …you’re safe with me.’

He speaks the words with such sincerity as he peers up at you, his hair falling into his eyes slightly where he’d spent his evening nervously, or perhaps stressfully, raking his fingers through it. In that moment you think you might tell him everything, that you might spill your life into his lap; the ugly dark truth.

…but then you think about the way he’ll run away from you…the way he’d walk away in just the same way all the others had.

You weren’t sure why the thought of him turning away from you bothered you so, this man who, for all intents and purposes should be your enemy, whose warehouse you’d waltzed into this evening with no idea as to why but every intention to stay...

... you just knew you didn’t want to lose him just yet.

‘I’m not going to judge you, y/n. …I just want to make sure you’re at your best so that you can deal with whatever it is that’s plaguing you. …I might have only know you for a few days, but you’ve always intrigued me from a distance. I’ve always found you-‘

‘What do you mean from a distance?’ you cut him off, the last corner of your brain that wasn’t laden with exhaustion picking up on the odd use of words that hinted at something further, and you find yourself watching him carefully as his eyes widen just the tiniest bit.

‘I monitor all the gangs in the area closely, y/n. I didn’t come to be of the caliber I am by ignoring others and simply focusing on my own wants for my gang.’ He explains, squeezing your hand gently and distracting you momentarily with its warmth and reassuring feel, before you’re quickly looking back up at him.

‘When you say monitor,….’ You begin, brain working faster than your conscious reactions as hope burns beneath your rib cage, the thought that maybe he already knew about your past and was still ready to accept you causing your heart to pound as your breathing silently speeds up.

‘I study my rivals. I learn their weaknesses and their strengths. I infiltrate other gangs databases so that I’m ready for any kind of attack I may encounter-‘

‘So you know the-you know everyone’s pasts? You know-‘

‘I know almost everything about you since you joined Kyuho’s gang…yes.’ Taehyung confirms, a glint of unsurity in the depths of his gaze as he watches you accept this information, but the way he’d worded his confession had you worrying about something much different than what he was concerned about.

‘since I joined…so you don’t-‘

‘I know the entire backstory of every single assassin and trainee in your gang,’ he begins intently, eyes flickering between yours as if he was searching you for something, and before he could even speak the words, you knew what he was going to say.

‘…except yours. Your file, before you met Kyuho, …was blank.’

A measure of despair enters you, the hope that had been building in your gut instantly being dashed as you realize he didn’t know. The need to run begins to tighten your muscles, a moisture welling in your eyes, and you quickly move your gaze from his, staring at your joined hands momentarily before all the defense strategies you’d adopted as habit over time suddenly swarm your body, taking away any control your subconscious had.

‘I think I should probably go. …get back to work and all-‘

His face fills your vision as he pulls you back to him from where you’d got to your feet and attempted to move away, and despite your cemented need to escape, you find your steely façade fracturing under the concerned expression he was pinning you down with.

‘I don’t care who you were before, y/n. We all come to be where we are for different reasons…but what brings us together is a need for comfort, and a need for revenge- it doesn’t matter how pretty you try to make the situation.’ He begins, his hold on your arm where he’d grabbed you being secure, like it could stay there forever and you’d never grow weary of it.

‘Please don’t run off because you’re scared about what I might think of your past…we’ve all got demons, angel…’

The need to flee takes a pause with those words, your eyes immediately flickering up to his to see him staring down at your hands once more as he slowly comes to grasp your fingers with his own, before peering up at you and offering you a timidly reassuring smile.

‘Please tell me you wont leave just yet.’

It’s the way he says the words so quietly, so timidly, that has you realizing the position you’d found yourself in; standing defenseless before the master assassin Kim Taehyung himself…with your heart racing at the way his eyes watched you closely as his tongue slipped out to moisten his lips.

You shouldn’t have gotten this close.

‘I have to go.’ You murmur, swallowing thickly as you battle against your desire to stay, seeing the light in his eyes dim as he frowns at your hasty retreat, a look of hurt painting his features as his grip on you loosens so that you can put some distance between you.

But even as you get to the doorway that would take you back outside, you find yourself slowing despite yourself, slowly turning back to look at him only to see him stood in the exact same space as he looks back at you, mournful expression flicking momentarily with hope at your pause, before his features become painted stoically once again when you make no move to return.

And its that charade of indifference that he shows you, the sight making you crave his soft side once more, that has you speaking your next words.

‘I’ll be back…I promise.’

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‘And where have you been all night?’

You roll your eyes at Kyuho’s abrupt, demanding question as you stroll into HQ a few hours later, barely 20 minutes of sleep under your belt, and only 4 shots of espresso to keep you going.

‘What jobs have you got for me today?’ is all you respond, not wanting to talk to him after what he’d said the night before, but knowing you had some unfinished business to attend to.

‘Are you going to answer my question or-‘

‘Im just here to finish what I started.’ You cut Kyuho off, the interruption pulling you from your memories of the way Taehyung had held your hand more or less all night, and you flash your gaze up to look at your boss directly in the eye, finding him looking back at you with a steely gaze that flashes with mild surprise.

‘And what exactly-‘

‘Just give me my file for the day. I want to get finished asap.’

All he can do is stare at you with a single raised brow, before turning around to retrieve your prepared instructions, muttering something under his breath as he does so. As he turns back to offer you the file you can see he’s about to say something, but before he can say anything you’re snatching the thin paper folder from him and heading for the door.

‘Y/N, I want to talk-‘

‘Works calling.’ You shout over your shoulder, hating the way you felt bad about your actions with the hint of regret you could hear in his words. But before you let yourself get hung up on him, you were mounting your motorcycle and speeding toward the destination of the day’s first tests.

You preferred the hand to hand combat; the pure rush of adrenaline that takes over every move you make until you find yourself blending into a machine of pure strength and skill, only surfacing from the high of it all once all danger had dispersed from your immediate path.

So few combatants that you faced these days really appreciated the focus and skill that was required for physical attacks, preferring to hide behind guns or other such weaponry that showed just how cowardly they truly were.

The person you faced now, for example, was clearly lost without the aid that he was so used to having, his nun-chucks lay 10 meters to the left where you’d thrown them only a moment before. However, it had only taken you seconds to realize that they were the only thing this guy was really skilled with; the sight of his hands trembling slightly where they were pursed before him making your lip curl, not in amusement, but anger at his clear disregard for the basic knowledge and skill of combat.

‘Just give up, it will be easier for you. I’ll even let you go if you tell me where your boss is hiding.’ You tell him, voice neutral, emotionless, not allowing him any advantage as you hold your ground, slowly, un-susceptibly moving closer to him as he continues to bounce ridiculously on his toes.

‘I’ll never give up. You’re the one that should turn around little lady.’

Boy did he sounds like a walking cliché.

For the past 30 seconds you’d been waiting for the swipe of his right arm to jut out toward your throat, the constant eyeing of your jugular having given away his intentions before he’d even consciously decided on making the attempt. Sadly for him though, you’d already plotted your own plan of attack, within miliseconds having his face pressed harshly to the concrete, and your knee forced snuggly against his spine, his cry of pain in response resonating around the darkened shipping yard.

‘I’ll give you one more chance. And I swear to god if you call me ‘little lady’ once more I will rip your arms from your sockets without thinking twice; don’t think I wont.’ You explain, leaning down to hiss the words in his ear as you hold his arms tightly behind his back, daring him to move as you wait for him to show his understanding with a barely susceptible nod of his head.

But of course, his ego ended up getting the better of him, and within minutes you were leaving him in a heap of collapsed limbs on the concrete, the groans and cries of pain emanating from him as you walked away with the USB he’d had hidden in his jacket, proof that if you made a promise to someone, even if it was to rip their arms out of their sockets…

…you were going to keep it

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘Boss, she’s back.’

You’d had all day to think over what had happened the night before, how Taehyung had confessed that he knew everything about you but the thing you simultaneously wished he did and didn’t know most. You’d spent almost every waking hour thinking about how you could tell him, what you wanted to say to him…..considering the way you’d found yourself thinking about him…

And yet you’d still arrived at the warehouse with no idea of what you really wanted to say-

-or why you’d even returned.

The simple sentence that had been called by Jungkook into the vast space of the room had been enough to conjure him from the small office hidden in the corner, the second he appeared in the doorway, hands in his pockets, regarding you across the space with a level yet silently thankful quirk of his lips causing your pulse to thunder in your ears as you look back at him, trying to stifle the smile that wanted to grace itself for him.

But that’s before his expression is suddenly slashed by one of concern.

‘What happened?’

Confused, you watch him stalk across the space towards you, eyes drifting over your body and bringing your attention down to your clothes, causing you to recall the struggles of your last mission in which you’d been painted by a couple of bloody spatters in a dirty brawl.

‘Oh, its nothing…I just- I should’ve gone home to change before I came, but-‘

The end of the sentence stops short on the end of your tongue, the words ‘I couldn’t wait to see you’ hanging silently in the air between you, and when your gaze flickers doe-like up to him you see him looking down at you with silent intrigue, mouth quirking into a knowing smile where his friends could only see his back as he stood before you, and the private moment had you subconsciously biting your lip as you continue to hold his gaze, heart racing in your chest.

‘Perhaps you’d like to get a fresh shirt.’ He mused, his statement seeming to offer you the chance to leave, but just as he sees the logical answer conflict in your gaze, he’s quickly remedying his choice of words, into one more promising for you to stay.

‘I have one in the office.’

Every time you saw him again, you found yourself getting caught up in his beauty. Compared to all the other mafia bosses that you’d ever met, with their hard faces, stubble sharpened jawlines, and perfectly gelled hair, the clean, smooth skin, soft sweeping hair, and perfectly sculpted features of the man before you always caught you off guard, causing you to admire his angelic perfection for a few moments before he caught you looking-

-as he did in that moment.

‘Come with me.’

The dagger-like, curious gazes of Namjoon, Jimin, and Jungkook staked themselves into you as you followed their leader across the warehouse floor and into his office without a word of explanation, the silence the moment held feeling like it was weighing you down up until the moment he shut the door behind you, and the two of you were alone once more.

His switch from mafia boss to caring man was almost instantaneous with the click of the door shutting.

‘How was your day?’

You watch him as he moves past you to a closet in an alcove of the room, his question being dropped into your hands as casually as though the two of you were life long friends, and despite your awareness of the fact you hadn’t automatically responded to his inquest with an answer, you couldn’t help but watch after him, confusion clouding your mind as you work to get your brain to catch up with the moment, and to stop dwelling on the way his hand had felt clutching yours as he’d pulled you into the small room.

‘That bad?’

His voice suddenly being in front of you, snaps you from your thoughts, your gaze shooting upwards to find him looking down at you with an eyebrow raised, smolder subconsciously twisting his features as he waits for your answer.

‘Here.’

You hadn’t even noticed the shirt he’d been holding before him, the way his hand suddenly clasps around your own as you go to take it from him causing you to nervously swallow as you wait for his next move, letting go of the breath you’d been holding when his hand gently drops from yours, before thanking him quietly.

‘I’ll leave you alone for a moment.’ He murmurs, his expression when you glance up at him being clouded with concern, and the way he looks at his feet, eyes not meeting yours, has you suddenly reaching for him before he can walk away.

‘Taehyung-‘

His instinctive, instantaneous turn of his head in your direction, eyes lighting up as every facet of his body seems to fine-tune itself to you has every concern you had trying to battle their way out of your mouth at once, the need to tell him just how you felt, the confusion, and the blind want for him bubbling to the surface…

…only for your instinctive assassin nature to smother them as though they were the enemy.

‘Thank you.’

‘No problem, Angel.’

Staring at his back as he disappears out of the door, you’re left wishing you could have said more.

(T.B.C)

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vitaminhosh · 6 years

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prince!seungcheol

anon requested: “prince cheol i will lvoe u forever”

pairing: seungcheol x reader

under the cut bc it’s ridiculously long

oH boy i am so ready for this au

one of the most charming and endearing princes out there??

there isn’t anyone one within a 100-mile radius that dislikes seungcheol like..... have you met him

and anyone who does kind of feel some sort of dislike towards him

they see him smile and oops

how did I not like him before?? he’s an angel??

he is genuinely hard working and kind hearted though, he works very hard to make the lives of his people better

when he was younger and wasn’t allowed to go out he would have to learn about the kingdom’s history and,, all the war and bloodshed absolutely broke his heart

he swore that when he was older he would never allow something like this to happen again

when he was finally allowed to go out and saw some of the people struggling to just make do, he was determined to make a change

nowadays he makes it his mission to go out and meet everybody and see how they’re doing as often as his busy schedule allows

he’ll have lunch in the town and chat with the people, anyone who saw from the outside wouldn’t even suspect that he was royalty and just think that it was a table of old friends

plus his absolute favorite meal of all time is in this small shop tucked away in one of the small streets in the heart of town, and it was,,, a burger

sure the food in the palace was obviously amazing with top chefs cooking there and all but,, nothing really beats the burger made in this small shop that people barely even knew about

we all know seungcheol will be a well-dressed prince

like,, he won’t want to be super over the top in full on capes and stuff but,, he sure as hell isn’t just walking around town in sweatpants or something

he cares about his image okay

(even though everyone will swoon even if he were to go out in sweatpants and a hoodie)

everyone in his kingdom is basically in love with him

as are the people in neighboring kingdoms

and far away kingdoms

the other princes are jealous

have you seen his smile though? it can cure diseases

he takes his responsibilities very seriously, but obviously, he’s still a young man who likes to have fun and gets bored too

he doesn’t like to sit still, so when he’s finished with all of his duties he’ll be off to go do something

even at odd times at the night, you can find him in a nearby kingdom trying to find this specific comic book or something

people don’t find it weird anymore

“oh look prince seungcheol is here again did you want more of these sweets?”

he’s often seen hanging out with the other princes when he can

the people die when they see their princes hanging out together

has public social media accounts but also secret personal ones

spams the group chat full of princes,, just because he can

ok enough background stuff onto you and cheol

you work in one of those small tucked away shops that prince seungcheol likes to frequent

however you’re not from this kingdom, and you only work the night shift so it’s not like you know a lot of people or much about this kingdom

you’re just taking this job to try and make some cash while you’re away from home traveling, you happened to choose to stay here indefinitely

you’re not entirely sure who this strangely good-looking man is who only comes in at 3am every week is but ?? business is business plus you’re not gonna judge,, it’s not like you’ve never had cravings for junk food in the middle of the night too

since it’s late at night cheol is dressed in very casual clothes so nothing really gives away the fact that he’s actually the goddamn prince of this kingdom

since he comes so often plus he just likes to get to know people he makes small talk while you gather up his stuff

after a couple of weeks, you soon become kinda like friends ?? it’s a weird circumstance but hell it’s 3am nobody’s really functioning well enough to question this

you’re sitting at the counter on your phone when the bell on the door rings signalling another customer

you just know it’s him again cause,,, not many people would be here at this ungodly time of night so you don’t bother looking up

you stop scrolling through instagram when you hear tutting in front of you

“I should complain to your manager you know- I’d rate this customer service a 1/10″

seungcheol watched as you finally looked up and chuckled at him

“sorry old man..... how can I help you, your highness”

seungcheol froze- did you finally find out who he was?

the reason he was so interested in you was because you didn’t seem to know who he was, and treated him like a normal person

his mind was going 100 miles a minute until you suddenly snorted

“god imagine it,, you ?? a king ?? pfft”

he smirked once he realized he wasn’t busted

“what do you have against me being a king huh?”

“idk man what kinda king buys junk food like three times a week at 3am,, plus ur a dork”

“wow,,, is that all i am to you,,,,,, a dork,,,, im hurt”

you smack his arm before starting to scan the things he’s put down on the counter

“how do you eat all this and stay in shape... tell me your secrets”

“god given metabolism sorry sweaty you can’t buy this :-)”

you snorted once again as you begin to pack his things into a paper bag

“did god accidentally spill all the ego into you as well”

“well i mean to help god out i do go workout too feel free to join me if you’re not too unfit to keep up”

“uhhh excuse me who are you calling unfit..... give me a time and place and I’ll fight beat you in a race”

“fine when do you get off tomorrow I’ll walk you to the hill and see who can get to the top first”

and that’s how you ended up at the bottom of a hill at 5am with a man you’ve never seen outside the shop

“whoever wins gets treated to breakfast”

“wipe that smirk off your face seungcheol I’m not getting beat by you”

surprise surprise,,,,, you lost

unfortunately he was much faster than you thought he would be

you were both lying on the grass, panting from running up a sizable hill

you punched his arm

seungcheol sat up, mouth open as he was about to whine when a voice came from the bottle of the hill

“your highness! there you are! you were supposed to return an hour ago you father will find out you’ve been out!”

seungcheol’s eyes widened before cursing under his breath

“I gotta go but you still owe me breakfast okay I’ll explain everything tonight ok bye !!”

you just sat there in shock as seungcheol dashed down the hill, even faster than before as the worker followed behind him

“y-your highness?”

you had flashbacks to seungcheol smirking when you laughed at the idea of him being king

you make your way back home, with a permanent blush on your cheeks and a million thoughts in your head

how could you not know that he was the prince?

oh god you’ve been smacking the prince for weeks when he makes a stupid dad joke

you can’t sleep that day and when you’re back in the shop you’re barely conscious

you’re too tired to even think about seungcheol saying he would explain tonight

when seungcheol comes in and makes his way over to the counter, he expects to find you on your phone again but instead sees you asleep on the counter

he smiles softly before grabbing an old receipt and a pen and writing a note

“sleeping on the job? strike two y/n. I really should complain to your manager, guess I was just too fast for you ;). I’ll be back tomorrow, get some rest. p.s. you might want to wash that hoodie, you drooled a little bit”

you woke up with a panic when your phone chimed at 5am, reminding you it was time to close up

oh god seungcheol was supposed to come

after you finally orientate yourself you notice the note on the table

after reading the note you flush red again

oh god you were asleep in front of the cute prince and d r o o l e d

you stumbled home after closing up and immediately went to sleep

later that day you rushed to the shop, almost late since you were so tired you slept through your alarm

as 2 am came around the bell on the door rang and you sat up straight

seungcheol didn’t usually come till around 3 so you assumed this was an actual customer

"I hope you washed that hoodie before coming back here tonight”

you looked down and noticed that you were in such a rush that you didn’t even change out of last night’s outfit

flushing pink, you quip back with a “so what if I didn’t huh”

seungcheol finally appears from around the shelf

“its a bit gross i gotta say”

“not as gross as you”

seungcheol looked at you with a soft smile on his face, trying to get the words in his head to form coherent sentences

“im sorry”

you looked at him with a blank face

“what for ?? i mean i know its kinda gross but like i was gonna be late for work and-”

“no, I’m sorry for not telling you”

you sat there with your mouth half open and closed it before looking down at your hands that were on the counter

“it’s okay”

he took your hands in his, making you look up

“it’s not, I shouldn’t have kept it from you. I’ve just never had someone treat me like everyone else and it was... refreshing. But you deserved to know, I was being selfish. I’m sorry”

you gave seungcheol a soft smile, giving his hands a soft pat as he looked down at his feet to try and get his attention

“seungcheol really, it’s fine. I understand why you did it, I’m not mad”

“I still feel bad, it wasn’t right. You should be mad”

“well I mean I am....”

seungcheol looked up, ready to apologize again

“but only cause you beat me in a race,,,,, outrageous”

you smack him again, trying to lighten the mood

“but a deal is a deal, and I still owe you breakfast”

seungcheol started giggling, and you swear your heart skipped a beat

“im trying to be serious here and all you care about is getting beat”

“cheol, i really don’t mind. plus, I’m a woman of my word, I can’t have you owe me, that’s ridiculous”

“I’m busy later, how about you just treat me to a late night snack here instead”

fast forward to a couple weeks later, and you’re back at that hill waiting for seungcheol to come so that he can introduce you to his prince friends as you have a couple of days off

you can actually hear them before you see them

who’s even surprised at this point it’s seungcheol + 12 rowdy boys

“guys please don’t be embarrassin- oH hi y/n you’re early hahaha”

“hi I’m jeonghan are you cheol’s girlfrien-”

seungcheol shoved the guy out of the way before he could finish his sentence

“sorry,,, my friends are idiots”

you chuckled as seungcheol sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, a light pink dusting his cheeks

“don’t worry, I like them”

“wE LIKE YOU TOO Y/N”

you giggled before heading over to the group of guys to go meet them properly

seungcheol stood still for a second, watching you introduce yourself to his friends a couple feet away

jeonghan came up to him, watching you with him

“when are you gonna ask her out, I thought you were going to the other day when you guys hung out at her place”

“she was tired so I let her sleep, some other time jeonghan”

they headed back to the group and you turned to them as you noticed the two join the circle

“cheol !! is it true that you tripped over a log and fell into the lake while trying to impress a girl when you were 6? i knew you were a dork but I didn’t think it was that bad”

“wHAT ARE YOU GUYS TELLING HER”

as the day began to end and everyone had to head back, seungcheol insisted on walking you back to your apartment

you had refused at first, but you were tired and it was late

when you got to your place you turned to seungcheol, about to thank him for walking you back when you saw him looking nervous

“cheol, are you okay? what’s wrong?”

“nothing,, I just,, y/n would you want- I mean- do you,, uh,,,, will you,, go out with me?”

you could barely hear him as he was mumbling but you just managed to catch his words

you put your hand on his cheek and pressed a quick kiss onto his other cheek

“of course seungcheol, it’d be an honor”

you smiled and said goodnight before heading inside

seungcheol stood there, frozen in shock as you had not only agreed but ???? you kissed his cheek ?????

you began to get ready for bed, a smile and a light blush on your face

you can’t believe you’re dating the biggest dork on the planet

seungcheol, on the other hand, was shouting at jeonghan down the phone; he practically skipping home

a/n: this is,,,,,, the longest thing ever im so sorry i got excited about this au

#seungcheol fluff #s coups fluff #seventeen fluff #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #seventeen #svt #svt fluff #svt imagines #svt scenarios #seungcheol imagines #s coups imagines #seungcheol scenarios #s coups scenarios #writing #hip hop unit #seungcheol #s coups #vitaminhosh

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carliejeanmakingperformance · 4 years

Text

Blog 1 - Paines Plough & National Theatre of Scotland

Describe briefly in a few sentences what each of the Paines Plough monologues were about.

Chris Thorpe - Manchester:

There are 8 people plus our protagonist in a living room in Manchester. The protagonist is lying on the floor as there were no seats left, while the other guests are ‘laughing like fucking monkeys.’ (Thorpe C, Paines Plough 2018) a man is hovered over him with his ‘boxers down around his knees’ (abid) and balls drooping over his mouth. Everyone is ‘a bit drunk’ (abid) and as he struggles to get up from the floor the rest of the room begins laughing more. On the 3rd attempt he is successful and stammers home upset and angered. He argues that ‘its not happening because who i am, its happening because where i am in the room’. (abid) His attempts to calm himself fail as when he gets home he grabs an iron golf club and marches back to his friends house. On arrival there are now only 6 people left in the party ‘all fucked’ (abid) and asleep, taking this opportunity he ‘I bring[s the club] round fast and hard right under his [friends] eye.’ (abid) Surprised as the force made ‘more of a splash’(abid) than a crack or snap as expected, he is then reminded that his hands and head often work separately. Reminiscent memories of his school days flashback seeing his now wife watching him smoke, and the intriguing nature of his hands doing ‘what they want’, (abid) bringing the realisation of his actions back to the now as she can no longer watch their actions pan out ‘forever.’ (Thorpe C, Paines Plough 2018)

Hannah Silva - Plymouth:

A girl watches as her father's aggressive ‘blood clot’ (Silva H, Paines Plough 2018) distorts his memories and makes him see things less clearly. Clouding over his memories of war, there is confusion over a letter, a French lady, and childhood memories where father and daughter would play Bach on piano together, despite his comments on her ‘tiny hands’ (abid) . His dreams and memories become warped as he forgets his daughters name and the horrors of war become more than just past experiences as the loving daughter longs for her father to remember that ‘he was a poet and she was a musician.’ (Silva H, Paines Plough 2018)

Chloe Moss - Liverpool:

It is 1988 in a Liverpudlian town overlooking north Wales, A girl is perched in a toilet cubicle on breaktime, trying to overcome her generalized panic disorder with her knees ‘bent against [her] chest.’ (Moss C, Paines Plough 2018) She feels the only way to help would be to leave school as not even her mantra is working on easing her anxiety. She is ‘the last person anyone expects to be bunking off school’ (abid) as she tells herself ‘I'm a good girl, I don't do things like this.’ (abid) Sneaking out and convincing herself and an older girl that she must leave for the dentist. Her only wish throughout is to have the ‘ability to enter a room of people without feeling puse.’ (abid) The protagonist finds herself on the beach where due to her teachers description of quick sand she has grown scared of the possibilities that there are ‘bodys underneath the dunes.’’ (abid) finding a place to hide a lady with ‘binky the dog’ approaches and starts talking about her dead son whose death can loosely be blamed on Margaret Thatcher, ‘the witch in charge.’ (abid) The girl awkwardly tries to get out of the convocation by going to retrieve a ball for the lady's dog, running as if ‘this is a parallel world which ordinary girls fly.’ (abid) This act allows her to realise that she was not saying her mantra while walking over the sand and that while focusing on other things she had moved passed the point of being scared. (Moss C, Paines Plough 2018)

Zia Ahmed - London:

The protagonist and their partner Broke up due to race differences and issues surrounding racism. He speaks of how he feels he always has to apologize for people of colour's mistakes. He repeats ‘i love you’ (Ahmed Z, Paines Plough 2018) throughout the story highlighting how even although they are no longer together he longs for them to be a part of their life. Using popular culture he explains how ‘where i come from bond looks like the bond villains and the bond villains look like bond’. (Abid) This monologue highlights how someone of a Pakistani background ‘feel most coloured when [they] get thrown against a sharp white background’, (Abid) which isn't helped by popular culture, and racism, where people of colour then feel they have to ‘go back to where they came from’ despite them being from that area, and not allowing them to stick up for themselves and having the right to say ‘I ain't English i ain't Pakistany, im London.’ (abid) This story is key in pointing out how racism, it’s behind you, no it's around you.’ (Ahmed Z, Paines Plough 2018)

Alan Harris - Cardiff:

A boy from Tonteg, Pontypridd was used to getting into trouble, he wore the right clothes and wanted to be the first to do everything such as getting ‘the top of their hair permed.’ (Harris A, Paines Plough 2018) It is who he became, drinking with ‘no consequences.’ (abid) The first time he ‘got arrested as an adult was in Caerphilly,’ (abid) he stole a push bike left in a ‘front garden’ (abid) and a police man caught him and threw him in a cell. In the corner of there cell there was a duck, he claimed that ‘the duck is staring at me, and it says ‘‘alright.’’’ (abid) The protagonist goes and touches the duck on his shoulder, stating ‘i can see the world from the eyes of the duck’. (abid) He then becomes the duck and has both his and the ducks memories. Using the toilet in his cell to get his feet wet, which made him ‘happy.’ (abid) He professed ‘they let me go, out of my way’ with wet feet at 5am, he sees some ducks and ponders on the thought that they are ‘Maybe looking for a new patch of water to call home.’ (Harris A, Paines Plough 2018)

What images/ characters / moments particularly stuck out for you in any of the Paines plough monologues and why?

Chloe Moss’ performance particularly stuck out to me as it reminded me of how stressful childhood is, it showed me how being young the smallest things seem to be magnified and heightened causing things to be larger than initially thought. The scene with the lady reinforced the initial panic of quick sand, yet as it developed it showed the value of listening and lending an ear to someone in need. This touched me as I felt the lady chose to see how much the girl needed someone and instead of prying, ofered convocation and elevated the girls fear.

The monologue set In Tonteg remainder me of vivid memories from home. The power of the strong welsh accent combined with a detail account of what a ‘valleys’ man feels although they should do to prove themselves to their friends was a clear and accurate reresentIon of my home town Pontypridd where this monologue is set.

Hearing how emotional Hannah Silva’s monologue was really helped paint the picture of a piano and how much music can effect an individual. The description of the piano accompanied by visuals on the ‘treble clef shaped blood clot’ not only created a connection between the writing and song but also the bloody and sanding reality that the protagonist father has a blood clot causing him to forget and muddy the past resting this beautiful sound of uncertainty.

How were the National Theatre Scotland monologues using the frame ( screen) to successfully tell a story?

Space was an important part of both monologues. The first has dark background, and the use of cinematography overlaying the monologue gives set and historical context to the scene, you could see the ‘monkey dung men’ (Poet F, cited by Watson J 2020) who worked there, as well as visually seeing the asbestos dust in which they were told too ‘breathe it in son’ - ‘there's men welding over there and your worried about a bit of dust.’ (abid) The monologue is delivered in interview style as he's talking to the camera, and you can see the raw emotion clearly as he's talking about how he ‘thought [he’d] dodged the bullet’ (abid) and chose to change trade to an electrician. ‘Jimmy read, that man could speak’ (abid) is visually captured through video aid showing Jimmy historically speaking to a crowd, allowing the audience to feel connected to the historic context being told within the story. Coughing is used to move between frames and it shows the effects of the asbestos, foreshadowing the context of the story ‘cough - pardon me - cough’ (Poet F, cited by Watson J 2020)

The second monologue differs as it is set in a Messy bedroom, which allows people to connect with the frame due to the set being universally recognised as well as the personal nature of the setting. Timeless is being captured within the frame as everyone has experienced being ill, with it jumping back to the main set of the messy room allowing the audience to feel as trapped as she is. ‘this room is a box i can’t get out of’ (Fagan J, cited by Dickie K 2020) allows for the story to not only be successful within the room she has chosen to set it in, but also within the box it is captured in on the website and even further onto the device its getting viewed from, this then makes the issues captured in the story magnified and much more significant than initially thought. Due to the video being recorded out of the normal format the frame is malleable and can be distorted allowing different angles such as the pacing and washing of hands through sanitisers and bathroom scrubbing to be more intimate and almost 1st person, as it is filmed as though we are looking as the protagonist and doing these things ourselves, really putting us into the mindset of the character. Having the frame watch her from the end of her bed reinforces the intimate feeling as if we were perched on the end of her bed and allowing her to talk to us, allowing us to move from sympathising with her in the main bedroom set, to then almost being her in the overlaid scenes. (Fagan J, cited by Dickie K 2020)

Bibliography

Ahmed Z, cited in Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

Fagan J, Cited by Dickie K 2020. Scenes For Survival Launch Collection | National Theatre Of Scotland. [online] Available at: <https://www.nationaltheatrescotland.com/latest/scenes-for-survival-launch-collection> [Accessed 4 October 2020].

Harris A, cited in Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

Moss C, cited in Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

National Theatre of Scotland. 2020. Scenes For Survival Launch Collection | National Theatre Of Scotland. [online] Available at: <https://www.nationaltheatrescotland.com/latest/scenes-for-survival-launch-collection> [Accessed 4 October 2020].

Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

Poet F, Cited by Watson J 2020. Scenes For Survival Launch Collection | National Theatre Of Scotland. [online] Available at: <https://www.nationaltheatrescotland.com/latest/scenes-for-survival-launch-collection> [Accessed 4 October 2020].

Silva H, cited in Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

Thorpe C, cited in Paines Plough (2018) Come to Where I’m From (2.0.3) [Mobile App] (Accessed:05/10/2020)

#makingperformance #painesplough #nationaltheatrescotland #drama

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harryff · 7 years

Text

Chapter 2 Aria Part 1.

Trigger warning: Sexual assault, domestic abuse. Please call the 1−800−799−7233 if you have suffered from any abuse.

In the next upcoming months Aria and Harry reconnected. Her album was to be released soon but she longed to go back to the days she sang background for the band.

Laying in bed she remembered the day Liam and Harry got into a fight over whose part she will sing along with and somehow she managed to appease them both. It was the first time Harry truly noticed her as he tells it to people.

It was currently 10pm in New York which meant it was 3am in Manchester where Harry was working on his album. Aria was supposed to be asleep instead her mind raced filled with anxiety she couldn’t relax instead her thoughts took her to the worst possible outcomes for performance the next day. To help pass time she texted him

Aria: I miss you big head lol😚😙😋

Aria: I can’t sleep😣😣😓😓☹

Aria: I wish I could call you but you’re sleeping beauty and you definitely need 6 hours of sleep at least or youll be evil lol 😴😴😴

Aria: Remember the time i made you stay up for 24 hours and you were grumpy the whole day and I had to make it up 😉😂

Aria: I have to perform tomorrow. I don’t want to. I’d much rather go back to the good old days where no one knew I existed

Aria: I still laugh at the memories of you falling on stage…. clumsy prince

Aria: I’m gonna have diarrhea tomorrow theres no way I’m gonna survive

Aria: Sorry TMI 🙊

Aria: Since I cant bug you you’ll wake up to like 20 texts. 😜

Aria: she sent picture of her sleeping with the teddy bear he got her 2 years ago

Aria: Me and Mr. H miss you

Aria: I had to give him surgery awhile back. Roxy the little shit ripped his eye out. I almost cried 😢😢😢

Aria: Imagine me a grown woman crying over a stuffed animal. 😂😭😭😭

Aria: I went into panic mode!! That was not a contingency I planned for she just bit his eye and yanked it out! Then she starts running with it! In her mouth! Chewing it! I never truly knew what panic was till that moment!😲😲😲

Aria: Damn dog😒😒😒

Aria: Arent you supposed to be up running? It’s 3

Aria: I miss you again

Aria: I don’t want to perform Harry

Aria: Will you be disappointed in me if I quit?

Aria: Will you call when you wake up?

When Harry woke up at 5am his time he read the texts laughing she was definitely panicking her nerves were getting to her because she was a chatter box.

He called her via Skype

Her computer facing her she raised up hearing the call she clicked the mouse before falling back in bed.

“Aria” he said watching her move around

“Yes”

“I see Roxy is around Mr.H” he said noticing the dog by her side

“Yes she was on 1 month probation after she did that”

He chuckled

“It’s not funny” she said sitting up

“Yeh ok?”

“No” she said looking down

“Yeh’ll do good!”

“I don’t like performing in front of people”

“Yeh did when we went on tour”

“Yes but no one knew it was me”

He sighed

“I have to perform for the executives at 9. Practiced my ranges”

“Don’t strain your voice”

“I know… what are you doing today besides calming my nerves”

“Just tha'nd recording”

“You’re working on your 3rd album?”

“Yes”

She smiled “you have great bed head”

He laughed “are yeh not sleepy?”

“I am I keep jerking in my sleep”

“Just relax poppet”

“I’m trying”

“I have to go for my run”

“Ok i’ll call you when I get done”

“Ok” he said blowing a kiss

She caught it.

Harry: How’d it go? He asked when she didn’t call by the end of the day he wondered how things went

Aria: 😭😭😭😭😭😖😓

Harry called her

Harry: Pick up poppet

Aria: No 😭😢

Harry: howd it go

Aria: ‘need more practice’

Aria: Tommy said ‘on a scale of 1-10. 1 being pretty bad and 10 being the worst performance ever that was a 7.’ 😭😭😭 I can’t do this

Harry:😒😒 drop him he’s a shitty manager

Harry: Pick up poppet please

She took a deep breath before answering his call

“Hey” she said

“Where are you?”

“At home” her voice broke

“Aww pet”

“I can’t do this Harry”

“I think yeh need another manager”

She sniffed “I wish you were here”

“I’ll be there soon pet”

She remained silent

“Wanna tell me what happened?”

“My voice shook the whole time….sang off key sounded like shit”

“It’s alright Aria”

“It’s not,” her voice was soft. “I’m not made for this.”

“Aria yeh are” he stressed

She sighed “how was your day”

“It was wonderful recorded 3 songs”

“Good”

“My album is done will you listen to it?”

He paused “i don’ kno’ if i should.” He was hesitant. In the past she depended so much on his opinion he got frustrated with the search of approval from him.

“Ok fair enough i’ll have Mr. H listen to it”

He remained silent

“Maybe i can do like a Sia thing but cover my whole body be in dungeon somewhere”

He was still quiet

“Ok Harry good night.” She said ending the call. She knew him too well he was asleep.

As she sat aimlessly looking at the ceiling she contemplated all the different things she could do to put an end to her contract. Get sick with a virus, purposely damage her larynx, car accident etc. When Harry awoke at 3am his time he called her she stared at the phone contemplating whether she would swipe right or left. The screen went dark she thanked the gods for not making her make that decision.

At 10 in the morning she found herself in the studio listening to Thomas or Tommy berate her

“ARIA! Im talking to you!” he said snapping her out of her thoughts

“Sorry” she cowered away

“WHY” he paused “why didn’t you perform like you did in this video? you were so good then what is it now?” he was showing her a video of her singing at a local jazz bar. There were only 10 people, people she would never meet this was different this was executives and produces people who had the power to build or destroy her career with one move.

“I dont know im just nervous”

“ABOUT WHAT? WE HAVE DONE EVERYTHING UNDER THE SUN TO GET YOU TO NOT BE NERVOUS? SO WHAT ARE YOU NERVOUS ABOUT NOW?

“EVERYTHING!” She argued back before looking at her phone Harry had called her 5 times already.

Harry: Aria are you ok ive called you multiple times

She recorded Tommy

He hit the wall beside her “YO YOU A FUCKING EMBARRASSMENT IT’S A WASTE OF TALENT YOU HAVE. I GOT A 10 YEAR OLD WHO WOULD KILL TO BE IN YOUR SPOT!” He walked away from her “…SO YOURE TELLING ME YOURE GONNA LET SOME 10 YEAR OLD OUT DO YOU? DO WE NEED TO MAKE YOU SING NAKED NEXT TIME?”

She spoke softly “Im sorry I can’t Tommy”

“DONT TOMMY ME! TELL ME YOU CANT! YOU JUST DONT WANT TO! YOU KNOW HOW HARD I HAVE WORKED FOR YOU! YOU OWE ME THIS!”

She sat silently and hit the send button

Harry: get up and walk away. He texted feeling his anger rise if he was there his fist would be connecting with Tommy’s jaw

Aria: I cant

Harry: Aria get up and walk away

Aria: he’s blocking the door.

She remained quiet waiting for the vent session to be over.

“You have a show tomorrow Chicago Bulls so get ready. Ya ass aint making a fool out of me again” She nodded leaving the studio. She ignored Harry for the rest of the day working on her vocals. She sat at home working on her ranges.

“You sound good Ria” her grandmother said cooking

“Thanks Grandma”

“Whats wrong?” she noticed her behavior

“Tommy screamed at me… told me lots of things i was an embarrassment to him… grandma i don’t know if i can do this”

“Youre too good dont let him ruin you!”

“I know”

Her phone lit up it was Harry texting her.

Harry: can you call me please

She stood up and went to her room to call him

“Aria” he said looking at her on the camera

“Hey” she said getting comfortable on the bed. Her eyes were puffy her nose was red. “How was your day?”

“Good.. are yeh ok?”

“I’m ok” she sighed

“Wha’ happened with Tommy”

“Have to perform tomorrow”

He tilted his head in confusion

“Yea”

“Don’ wan yeh to be sad pet”

“I’m ok Harry. Me and Mr. H will be tough” she joked

He chuckled “I’ll be there soon so save some luvin for me yea?” “No you dont get any”

“Wha’? Why?” he smiled

“Well see me and Mr. H have a bond even you can’t break. I have been there with him through thick and thin” her eyes welled up “and he wont” her voice started to break “and he wont let me down and i won’t do the same to him… sorry i dont mean to cry”

“Aria dont cry pet”

She chuckled wiping her tears “I don’t even know why im crying Harry thats the problem. With Mr. H i know i cant let him down"

“You never let me down" he spoke softly

“I have, i know that, but im trying not to.”

He sighed not knowing what to say. She was always too hard on herself. Her worst critic never letting up on her imperfections. “ ‘M gonna go to bed” he mumbled

“K good night” she said before ending the call

The next day she walked onto the court her hands shaking getting ready to sing the national anthem. Tommy had softened his tone but his words were still harsh. She found herself panicking 30 minutes prior, hunched over with a paper bag to her mouth. The cameras flashed she brought the microphone to her mouth. She closed her eyes imagined she was at home. When the song was done people jumped to their feet cheering her on. She thanked them and rushed off court. It was one of her best performances.

“WHOO!“ Tommy cheered “THAT WAS IT! THAT’S WHAT YOU DO!… You sounded so good. Thats what you do in front of the execs don’t worry about them you got this Aria!”

She smiled taking a deep breath in she wanted to leave there was no celebration for her this only meant the inevitable an album release and a music career.

“Thanks Tommy can i go home now?”

“Nah lets go party!” “I really dont want to”

“Look its for your image just one drink” he begged

“Ok” she sighed as they made their way to club she texted Harry

Aria: I think i did ok everyone is happy

Aria: Going to the club with Tommy

Aria: Text you when i get home

It was supposed to be the club but they pulled up to his house, there was a party going on

“Tommy i thought you said club” she said giving him a look

“I know but house parties are fun!”

She shook her head this was her first time in his house “I’m not”

“Please just one drink you promised”

“Fine one drink and i’m done”

An hour passed one drink turned to two and two turned to three she thought. Her head was spinning, Tommy was being too friendly, he was groping her in places he shouldn’t have. When she tried to leave his grip on her wrist tightened when she fought back he put her arm behind her making her face the crowd as he dry humped her from behind. When he dragged her to the bathroom she used the opportunity to escape.

“Come on!” he stressed in a playful tone licking her neck forcing her against the wall

“No stop” she said weak from the concoction she was never a light weight so this was not the norm for her He hit her thigh “I said come on!” his thigh wedged between hers his tone changed he was being forceful

“Stop Tommy” she tried to fight him off

He held her hands above her with one hand while the other groped her body “You know you want this dick, Harry can’t do you like me”

“Please” she begun to cry she was too weak

Abruptly the door swung open. The man looked at Aria’s face “Yooo chill!”

“I’m not doing nothing” he said stepping away from her with his hands up

She quickly maneuvered from him he reached out for her but her arms were too quick on her way out she fell to the floor. Only managing to stand up and rush up the steps she found a room and locked herself in it. Quickly she dialed Harry’s number forgetting he wasn’t in the US, when she remembered she called her grandmother

“Aria do you know what time it is? im asleep!”

“Grandma please come get me” she sobbed on the phone

“Whats wrong?” she sensed the urgency

“He almost raped me i dont know whats wrong with me”

“You stay there i’m calling the cops”

“NO! please”

“Where are you?”

“Tommy’s house on 3rd bellavue house with all the cars”

“Stay where you are I’m coming!”

It felt like eternity waiting for her grandmother. She was finding herself waking up from an unconscious ous state every 5 minutes. She was fighting to stay awake. Her phone rang 4 times before she awoke

“Hello? Hello? Aria!?”

“….Grandma?”

“Where are you? You tell me now or i’m coming in with my shot gun!”

“I’m coming don’t” she said weak

Slowly she stood up her legs felt like jello, she opened the door and walked to the staircase held onto the railing with a death grip the party was dying down. She saw him at the corner of her eye he was mingling slowly she walked down the steps trying her best to not draw any attention to herself. When she got to the bottom of the stairwell. The door seemed so far away there were so many people in the way she tried to quickly move around them

“Aria? Is that you?” she heard his voice

“ARIA! I’m calling you!” fear took over she was pushing people out of the way, when she reached the door she opened it and collapsed her grandmother already standing outside her car ran towards her

“Aria” he spoke in her ear as pulled her up. She winced away

“YOU GET AWAY FROM HER!” her grandmother threatened

“I’m just trying to help her out”

“YOU TOUCH HER I’LL BLOW YOUR WHOLE FACE OFF!”

His temper rose “CALM THE FUCK DOWN OLD BITCH!” “I GOT YOUR BITCH TOUCH HER AGAIN AND YOU WON’T HAVE A DICK” She whimpered standing up

“Aria are you ok?” she spoke to her helping her up

She limped to the car her ankle sprained

When they got to the house it took her grandmother 10 minutes to wake her up

“Oh thank God! Aria what did you drink?”

“I don’t know” she said turning her head away from her

“Let’s get you in the house”

She slumped on the couch her grandmother close by the whole night.

The next morning she woke up with a splitting migraine confused about what happened

She groaned her memory was hazy, she remembered drinking a blue motorcycle and Tommy being aggressive she remembered him walking her to the bathroom his smile on his face his eyes telling her something else

“Oh mi nieta you’re awake!”

Her voice raspy “Grandma what happened?”

“Thomas tried to rape you!”

She thought “No… what?”

“Aria you called me you couldn’t even stand! you need to call the cops i think you were drugged”

“He what?” she sat up needing to piece things together

She picked up her phone there were texts from Tommy

Tommy: i hope you had fun i had too much to drink

Tommy: im sorry about what i did I love you😗 Aria i would never hurt you i was just fucked up Tommy: shit you were too,

Tommy: grinding on me i miss read the signals, you know that right? You know how i get when im fucked up

Tommy: tell your g ma to chill i was fucked up too shit you were too

Tommy: call me when you get this

Miranda: 😁😀YAY bestfriend you did good!

Her mind tried to remember what happened but it couldn’t dnt her wrist was bruised, she rubbed it to sooth the pain.

“Aria you need to call the cops!”

She shook her head “I don’t”

“Well freshen up clear your head”

“How’d i get home?” she looked around

“I came to get you! that rapist was trying to pull you back in”

She stood up and fell to the ground

“Ahh!” She grimaced grabbing her swollen ankle

“I think you sprained it” her grandmother picked up her foot “here put it up let me get some ice”

In the bathroom she undressed she noticed bruises on her neck, her thighs and knees when the skirt fell she covered herself with her hands, she had no underwear, she could not remember what happened to it. In shower she tried the best she could to remember she couldn’t. But she also knew something wasn’t right. she scrubbed hard feeling dirty. She felt a sick feeling from the pit of her stomach she hunched over unable to stop it. She vomited.

In her sleep it came to her in a flash

She saw herself drinking her drink.That nauseous feeling intensified

“I gotta go I don’t feel good.” she steadied herself by holding his shoulders

“No stay” he rubbed her sides

She shook her head “I’m leaving”

“I said stay” he insisted pulling her back, her back to him he breathed on her neck. She moved her neck away “Mmmm you have a nice ass” he said before smacking it

She shot up in cold sweats her head pounding was it true? Did he really do that?

She looked at her phone there were texts from Harry. He sent her a screenshot from the tabloid the caption “Looks like you and Thomas had fun, you did great! I watched it! what a way to celebrate😂😋” the picture her hair on her face with one arm behind it looked like they were in the middle of a dance. Her wrist ached as if it had a memory of the pain that was inflicted upon it. Harry was oblivious to the dark truth. feeling nauseous she jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Rising slowly she cried looking at herself in the mirror.She blamed herself she should have known better. She should have been more careful.

Picking up her phone there was another message from Harry

Miranda: Bitch call me you look lit😂😜

Miranda: Umm that picture doesnt look right call me 🙁😕😞

Harry: call me when you wake up pet I miss your voice😗.

She snatched her laptop from the floor quickly she searched flights to Manchester leaving the next day. She was willing to pay any price once she got the confirmation email she hopped off the bed and three clothes into her suitcase

Her grandmother walked into her room “Where you going you can’t leave!”

“Manchester”

“Are you going to tell him

“I can’t even remember what happened! if it happened will he believe me?”

“Aria he can’t get away with what he did! now I don’t know how the music industry works but that man cant walk away from what he did to you!”

“I know mimi”

“So call the cops”

“I..” she looked to the bathroom

Her grandmother stressed her point “tell him.. Harry will know what to do…. have you talked to him?”

She shook her head

“I’m not going to let this go”

“I know”

“How’s your head?”

“Pounding”

“Well relax I will finish packing for you”

The next day she found herself in Chicago O’hare limping around she hadn’t told Harry about her plan to stop by.

Tommy: You haven’t called are you ok

Tommy: just call me or send a text to tell me your ok

She felt sick looking at the texts holding onto Mr.H she walked around till her flight departure time. When she landed at 2pm she made a beeline for his condo.

She knocked in the door she quickly wiped away her tears

“Yea yea!” she heard his voice through the door

He stood confused for a second before his face lit up

“Poppet! Wha’re yeh doing here?“ he asked lifting her into a tight embrace

“I missed you” she confessed

“Yeh should have told me!”

“I just did!” she said forcing a smile

He leaned down to kiss her she could only manage a few kisses it was killing her.

“What do I owe this delightful surprise?” she shrugged walking in

“Hey” she greeted his band

“ARIAAA!”

She smiled

“Yeh should have told me really” he said pulling her down on his lap. “ ‘M flying to London tomorrow family time”

“Oh” she said looking down

“Yeh’ll come with me?”

She nodded

“Wha’ happened to your foot?” Weezer asked

“I fell... heels”

“All that partying yeh ‘nd Thomas did” Harry commented “yeh never texted by the way”

She swallowed hard smiling at him “sorry forgot”

He raised his eyebrow

“So what are you up to today?” she asked

“Last recording session are yeh ok?” he noted her pale complexion

“Yea, just cold”

“Yea we gotta go mate” Stevie said noticing the time

“Oh shit! Yeh want to come?” he said standing up

She shook her head

“Jet lag?”

She nodded

He leaned down placing his forehead on heres “Ok well yeh kno’ where the food is. Don' eat all my bananas. I’ll be back ok?”

She forced a smile fighting the tears “yes”

“Are yeh sure you’re ok?”

She hated that he could read her like an open book

“Yes” she said kissing him

“One more” he said biting his lip

She wrapped her arm around his neck. It took all the energy she had to put passion into the kiss

“Oi! we gotta go.” Stevie said

As the day turned to night she sat crying on the couch. She checked her emails wanting to tell her grandmother she was safe. Her heart dropped seeing Tommy’s name on the list she hesitated to open it. When she did it was a picture of her in the airport the title read Aria party girl rushed to Manchester to see Harry. The caption read Rumor is he called her screaming mad about the picture of her and manager Tommy G. His email: Im fucking calling you and you in UK? We got sessions you better be back by Tuesday. She felt sick to her stomach they couldn’t be more wrong. Sleep finally seeped in after hours of laying awake. Her memory flashed through her dreams

“Come on” he says grabbing her hand he had a goofy smile on his face pulling her towards the dance floor

“No Tommy” she tries to resist

He pulled harder making her collapse into him “damn baby! I didn’t know you wanted it like that?” he chuckled

“Stop” she pushes away from him

His hands grab her ass he is holding her in place as he rubs his nose on her neck “you gonna feel so good on my dick”

She sat up immediately tears flooded out of her eyes this couldn’t be happening she thought. She got off the couch and went to lay in bed. A migraine already thumping through her brain she lay in bed when she heard the door open she turned on her side pretending to be asleep.

Harry quietly took of his clothes and retreated to the bathroom. She could hear him humming behind the water. When he got in bed he cradled behind her kissing her cheek before falling asleep. As she begun to get sleepy she prayed she wouldn’t wake up from a nightmare. In the morning her prayers were answered she softly got out of bed and got ready. Harry woke up an hour later.

“Wha’ do yeh want for breakfast pet?”

“Nothing this is fine”

“ ‘Re yeh sure? you’ve been pushing around the cereal for 5 minutes” she was in a daze she didn’t notice

She shook her head “it’s fine I promise” she lied

He grabbed her hand “Ok are yeh sure? cuz i’ll get yeh anything yeh want”

“I promise” she said forcing the spoon in her mouth.

When they got to his mother’s house she was greeted with love

“Aria come in we have missed yeh oh I always knew yeh two would get back together!” Anne hugged her

She smiled

“Aria!” Gemma greeted her “finally someone we like… no love”

“When are yeh goin to marry her Harry?”Anne asked

“Oh muuum” he fussed

“ ‘M just saying she took yeh back it’s a sign”

Gemma chimed in “Yea no one wants yeh but her so yeh need to be in your knees”

“These’re strangers not my family I don’ kno’ wha’ alien planet they come from” he joked causing them to laugh

Gemma grabbed her hand dragging her away from Harry “We have to catch up that dress at the wedding to die for where did you get it?”

“Michael Castello designed it”

There was a lot of catching up to do which Aria gladly agreed to do anything to take her mind off that night

At dinner she sat once again pushing her food

“Do yeh want something else?” Harry whispered

“No!” she got scared “this is fine!” she put a mouthful in her mouth

He gave a look she was definitely being strange. She had no appetite there was a raging migraine she was trying to calm down. After yawns went around the room after dinner every one retreated to their rooms

“Ok off it pet what’s the problem?” He asked while they lay in bed. He was trying to find out what was wrong with her

She spoke softly “Nothing”

“No there’s something big show comin’ up?”

“No just thinking”

“About?”

She shook her head and smiled

“Yeh don’ wan’ to talk ‘bout it?”

She shook her head

“Ok” he looked down at her holding Mr.H “You’ve been holding him awfully tight can’ yeh hold me like tha’ too?” He joked

“No you might break” she teased

“Wha’?”

“You might break” she held back her smile

“Are yeh saying I’m weak?” He asked towering her

“……..Yes”

“Yeh wanna test tha’ theory?” he asked before kissing her deeply his kisses made her forget momentarily but when he started grabbing her thighs and kissing her neck is when her mind refused to let it go. She froze eyes shut tight. He noticed the tension in her body he raised up to look at her

“Aria wha’s wrong?”

“Nothing”

“You’re stiff as a board look at me” she opened her eyes “wha’s wrong?”

She sighed “I can’t…. not tonight”

He huffed “ok” he gave her sweet kisses

“Sorry”

“Don’ be luv is just sex… I can take care of myself” he said winking

She giggled “Perv”

“Hey only for yeh”

“I guess I should feel special”

At night her prayers were not answered. Her mind took her back to that night

She looks around people are dancing she doesn’t know where she’s going but Tommy is pulling her towards it.The bathroom door is kicked open and he pushes her inside

“Stop it Tommy” she says trying to walk passed him. He closes the door with his foot. He charges towards her stuffing his tongue in her mouth. She pushes him away and slaps him. His hand is immediately around her neck his eyes cold and dark he pushes her against the wall. “bitch ill kill you matter of fact” his other hand loosens his belt

“please” she begs clawing at his arm he pulls out his penis, "you know you want this dick" he jams his knee into her thighs forcing them open. “shut up.” He reaches up her skirt to rip off her underwear. He pulls hard making her body jerk forward before the fabric gives way. "Harry cant do you like me" He gets closer kissing her neck she tries pushing him off he places both arms above her head holding them by the hands he reaches between her thighs she’s crying “please” she begs. He stops and looks at her he licks his hand before he palms her vagina. He moans “you wet already, just how i like it”

She shot up from her sleep in a cold sweat immediately she ran to the toilet a violent vomiting spree was to begin.

Harry groaned “Aria?” he turned to his side to confirm she wasn’t there

“Aria” he called sitting up hearing the vile noise. Slowly he got out of bed and walked towards the bathroom. He knelt down beside her rubbing her back

“Something yeh ate?” he offers explanation

She nods in agreement

When she’s done her hands are shaking she can barely wash her face. She was pale as if she saw a ghost

“Wha’s wrong?” he asked noticing her expression

She turned around with tears in her eyes if he only knew

“Shhh it was just a dream” he sooths her hugging her tight.

But it wasn’t was it? Tommy really did those things. The reality was setting in.

In the morning she continues to rub Harry’s arm unable to fall asleep she lay awake against his chest

During breakfast she checked her phone

Tommy: Where the fuck are you at

Tommy: you think it’s funny you fucking with my career

Aria: I need more time please

Miranda: so you really gonna ignore me your bff?

Mimi(grandmother): Aria have you told him

Aria: Not yet I will soon I promise

As Gemma and Aria shopped around she tried her best to act natural.

“Are yeh ok?” Gemma asked during lunch Aria even though trying her best was very distant

“Yea!” she said putting on a happy face

“Sure? yeh look pale”

She smiled “Yea lack of sun” she joked

“Tell Harry he owes you a vacation”

She smiled Gemma her biggest advocate always made Harry go out of his way for her “Only if you come too!”

“You know it!”

As the day wound down she hopped the night would be gentle on her she couldn’t wake up from another nightmare.

“Did you see this?” Harry laughed showing her a picture of her crawling up the stairs. Who would possibly take that picture and furthermore insinuate she was going to have sex with Tommy?

She smiled

“Yeh were having fun weren’t yeh?”

She remained silent

“But ’m glad yeh ‘nd Tommy handled your differences” he said falling asleep

She melted into his chest not wanting to remember anything

The next day she Aria, Anne, and Gemma decided to clean up then treat themselves to dinner. She got multiple texts during the day. People were asking her about the picture.

Miranda: uh you need to call me NOW! i know your ass didnt fuck tommy

Miranda: you disappeared to Manchester whats up☹

Miranda: ARIA what did Tommy do to you? Why did Mimi call me crying???😭😭

Aria: i can’t talk about it Miranda, not now

Mimi: have you told him

Aria: not yet Mimi

Mimi: im not playing do it or I will

Aria: ok ok

~With Harry~

“Whoa Harry have you seen this?” Weezer asked

“Wha’?”

“Look” he looked at the heading Tommy G accused of sexual assault 2 victims have come forward the caption: ‘Both victims claim it happened in his house we will keep you posted’

He frowned “he didn't” he paused to think remembering the dirty glances he gave women

“I gotta find out more” Weezer said scrolling through his phone

As the day went on he couldn’t help but think about it. It gnawed at him this was her manager, someone who was close to her.

“Oh shit! Now they are saying one of the girls was assaulted the night he partied with Aria”

Harry tried to shake it off. “no he couln’ have”

Stevie rushed to him“Harry have you seen?”

“Yea” not wanting to be bothered by it

“No look!” Stevie said shoving the phone at him

Harry looked at him before grabbing the phone he read the words ‘A witness has stepped forward caught him in the act.’ As he read the details his heart rate picked up ‘…. walked in on him with his female artist.’ Tommy only managed Aria and another female artist who was absent that night

“Have yeh talked to Aria maybe its someone else” they tried to reason

“Did she tell you anything?” Gigi asked

He looked at them “no she would tell me”

When the day ended even Gemma got notifications on social media people were tagging her on the posts. Aria’s phone was buzzing nonstop.

Miranda: Aria

Miranda: dont ignore me im your best friend,…. thunder buddies for life

Miranda: Aria

Miranda: did it happen?

“Aria wha’s this?” Gemma asked showing her the article. Her heart sank reading the article Tommy was getting charged with sexual assault. Two victims identified one had yet to come forward. She was the remaining piece.

She shook her head “its nothing”

“They’re saying you’re the other woman is it true?”

“Other woman for what?” Anne asked taking the phone from Gemma’s hand

As Harry rushed to his mother’s house he thought to himself those pictures that were taken, she did look uncomfortable in Tommy’s embrace. The bruised wrist she explained away seemed to be the one he was holding behind her back. She also never got that drunk in public so it was strange that she got that drunk, even when she got drunk she was never that sloppy, falling all over the place hair in her face.

As Aria tried to convince Gemma and Anne that wasn’t her her phone lit up

Miranda: Shit is hitting the fan I hope you told him

Tommy: you bitch

Mimi: hope you told him

Aria felt her breathing hitch

“Aria this sounds like yeh!” Gemma said reading more articles

“It’s not” she whispered

Harry rushed through the kitchen door he walked in “Aria” he called

She smiled at him but stopped soon after his face was one she couldnt read ”….yes” she answered warily

“Yeh promise to tell me the truth?” it was supposed to be a statement but came out as a question

“Yes anything” she half smiled

“Wha’s wrong Harold?” his mother asked noticing his expression

He paused before speaking standing across from her. His eyes burrowing into her soul. “Wha’ happened that night at Tommy’s house?”

She looked down. Her nightmare was coming to life. It seemed forever when she heard her name being called.

“Aria” Harry called his eyes were becoming more bewildered by the second, her silence was confirming his gut instincts. She looked up at him before looking down. Pulling at her sleeves occupying her hands. She was losing the battle on holding back her tears. It wasn’t long before he called again.

“Aria… I asked yeh a question” his voice assertive he walked closer to her searching for her eyes. His breathing uneven. He needed her to tell him nothing happened. Everyone was looking at her waiting for an answer.

“ARIA!” he screamed in frustration. He startled them.

“Oi! Wha’s going on in here?” His dad asked walking in

The tears won they poured out of her eyes

“Aria tell me wha’ happened!” anger spewed in his voice

“Harold!” his mother scolded in a whisper

“Oh my god!” Gemma said in shock

The whole room came to the realization something dark happened that night. Her behavior made sense now the lack of appetite,the pale look on her face, the vomiting, the insomnia, the night mares.

“Aria” he whispered she had yet to speak. He needed her to say it was a joke. That there was no way it happened.

She looked up at him with tears rolling down her face, her hands were shaking pulling on her sleeve “please don’t make me go back to that night” she spoke softly

“Oh!” Anne grabbed her chest “yeh poor thing” Anne immediately rushed to her side and held her in a tight embrace.

“Harry he didn’…. did he?” Gemma looked at him hoping he could offer up a reason

He squatted down. Holding his head. There were no longer butterflies in his stomach from fear of the truth. Fear was replaced with anger which started from his chest and radiated out “ ’M GONNA KILL HIM!” He said standing up

“Oi! Stop that!”

“Dad not right now!” He paced the floor “…. That BASTARD put his hands on yeh? im going to kill him!

“CALM DOWN HAROLD!” His father said grabbing his shoulders

Aria sobbed in the background. He should have known something was wrong. Her eyes told him something was wrong they were filled with sorrow. He pushed passed his father going outside.

“Oi! come back’ere!” His father chased after him

Gemma knelt down next to her crying and hugging her “Im so sorry Aria”

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