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#it's not at all summer yet but it is spring!!
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Heatwave
Pairing: Gale x Fem Tav
Summary: It is the final social event of the summer season, and Tav has dressed poorly for a festival in the midst of a heatwave. One-shot.
Warnings: Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Sweat-licking, Smut.
Word Count: 3.9k
A/N: Another smutty Austen inspired work with a bit of fluff! This time in a universe outside of BG3. There definitely seems to be a weather theme in these one-shots. Maybe they'll fuck in the snow next, who knows?
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The Festival of Shieldmeet had dominated conversations throughout the city all summer long. With the event occurring only once every four years, the anticipation had reached a fever pitch, rendering even the sweltering heatwave a minor inconvenience. The idea of postponing or, heaven forbid, cancelling such a revered social event due to something as minor as the weather was simply inconceivable.
The festival was being held in the sprawling grounds belonging to some Lord or Lady who had earned the privilege of hosting. In the heart of a large, manicured, bloom-laden garden stood a bandstand where bards were tuning their instruments, ready to serenade the guests with summer melodies. Alongside it stretched a long table adorned with dishes piled high with the richest Waterdhavian delicacies. Attendants in crisp uniforms weaved through the crowds, bearing trays laden with sparkling drinks in tall glasses, as well as refreshing juices and icy water. There also seemed to be tables scattered around with trays stacked with rolled up flannels sitting in ice, patiently waiting to be scooped up and dabbed at the forehead of the sweltering guests - These seemed to be a welcome addition, as there was scarcely any shade to be found anywhere. 
Tav found herself in a state of utter misery. Seeking solace from the stifling crowds, she had retreated to the embrace of the shade beneath an oak tree bordering the garden, where she fervently fanned herself out of sight. She had naively and desperately assumed that the shade would cool her, but despite the protection from the sun’s direct attention the air was still just as cloying, and squeezed her with suffocating stillness. What she wouldn’t give for even the whisper of a breeze. The sad little paper fan she had acquired was doing very little work for her, just pushing the warmth forwards and heating her even further in her efforts to keep it moving. 
For some inexplicable reason she couldn't recall, she had chosen to don her finest silk gown over a whalebone corset. It hugged her curves with an unforgiving grip, accentuating her form and lifting her breasts. With a smile as wide as her hips, she had admired herself in the mirror before departing. However, that smile faded the moment she stepped out of her cooled carriage and into the searing heat of the midday sun. She had immediately noticed the guests dressed in garments far more suited to the occasion than her own.
What a foolish notion this had been, she mused, wiping a bead of sweat from her brow. She had no idea what had driven this madness. Well.. she thought as she peeked out from behind the tree and across at the crowd gathered in the garden, maybe she had a slight idea. 
Gale Dekarios was an exceptionally handsome man who exuded infuriating arrogance, boundless pride, and endless charm. From their first encounter at the spring ball, he had claimed her attention at every subsequent event. She had ‘accidentally’ stepped on his foot during one of their early dances, after he had explained to her his proficiency with magic and his gallant willingness to at least try and teach her some of his simpler spells. He had laughed at her annoyance, apologised profusely, and kissed her hand at the end of the evening. She had been aflame ever since.
Throughout the season, they had fallen into a familiar routine. Their ritual involved stealing glances at one another, offering subtle gestures of acknowledgment, and then both making a concerted effort not to meet eyes again. Yet, inevitably, one of them would find themselves drawn towards the other. It was a dance of restraint, leaving Tav exhilarated each time, despite the exhausting choreography. She was never really sure who was leading the dance, but at this moment, sweating and flustered and hiding behind a tree, Tav decided it probably wasn’t her. 
As each evening would draw to a close, he would always bid her goodnight with a kiss upon her hand, each time lingering longer than the last, and tell her how much he was looking forward to their next meeting. Upon returning home, Tav would often find herself lost in fantasies, imagining his hand tangled in her hair, his lips tracing the curves of her body. More often than not, these night-time reveries ended with her own desperate touch and his name cried out from her lips.
In the privacy of sweet slumber, she would dream of their next encounter, eagerly anticipating another opportunity to engage in their dance and hoping to step on his feet once more.
Maybe she had more magic in her than she realised, as her very thoughts appeared to have summoned him to her hiding place.
“Ah, Miss Taventon. I thought I spotted you retreating all the way out here.” He greeted her with his customary charm. As always, he was a vision to behold, with his dark, mischievously glinting eyes and sweeping brown locks pulled back from his face. Clad in simple yet impeccably tailored attire—a snug waistcoat over a pristine white shirt, adorned with a luxurious silken cravat, and well-fitted breeches. Frustratingly, he looked completely unaffected by the blistering warmth, and Tav thought she must look like a sweating, breathless fool in comparison. She only had time to be embarrassed momentarily, before she realised the precarious nature of their situation.  For the first time, they were properly alone together and Tav blushed at the thought of being found with him behind a tree so far away from the party. There would be a scandal. 
“Mr. Dekarios, a pleasure.” She looked around to try and see if anyone would catch them in their compromising seclusion, but it appeared they were safe for now. “I’m afraid you’ve caught me a little affected by the heat. I was just after a moment of respite.” She began to fan herself more fervently.
“Understandable, I'm sure. For one not versed in magic.” His smugness had returned, and Tav always treated it as a welcome challenge.
“Well, not all of us are as exceptional as you” She batted her eyelashes at him sweetly and took in his cool, handsome appearance. “Let me guess, enchanted clothing?” He bowed his head in confirmation of her appraisal, still looking smug and annoyingly unflustered by the heat. “A shame it could not chill your ego, but alas, I suppose your talent has to end somewhere.” 
His smile in return was genuine. He very much enjoyed her banter. Almost as much as he enjoyed seeing her sweating under the shade of the giant oak tree. 
He raised a hand in mock defeat. “Peace, my lady. I came bearing a gift. In an effort to cool your skin, and perhaps even your temper.” She really was ravishing in this state, he thought, overheated and fiery. He wondered whether she was aware of his true intentions in seeking her out. It was the final event of the summer season, and as such, their elaborate game would have to come to an end. 
As she reached out to accept the cool towel he offered, a surge of boldness seized him. With a swift motion, he closed the distance between them until he was almost pressed against her, and with a tender touch, he placed the cold flannel against the side of her neck. He had hoped it would elicit a reaction from her, at the very least a small gasp of surprise, but she remained silent. She just watched him as the droplets from the towel trailed slow down her neck, caressing her collarbone in the way his fingers ached to, and gathering to rest glistening on the shelf of her breasts which had been pushed up by her corset. 
He had thoughts of ripping it off her. The silk of her dress would tear like tissue in his practised hands, and he would cast the tatters of it into the wind and spend an entire afternoon finding where the pools of her sweat gathered. He ached to know what undergarments she was wearing, what colour, how the material would taste if he pressed his tongue against. It. He hoped it was white cotton, something the scent and taste of her would cling to - so damp with sweat and desire that he would be able to see her dark curls through the material. 
He could feel the cooling enchantment wrapped round him waning as his concentration and resolve were tested. Damn heat. Damn woman. She knew exactly what she was doing. Who wears a silk-wrapped corset in a heatwave? Each bead of sweat and whisper of her heated musk was a siren’s call, and he was determined to drown himself in the ocean of her. 
“I am no expert in fashion, Miss Taventon, but I must question the decision to wear a silk gown in such conditions. Surely linen, or cotton would have been preferable? Or maybe one enjoys the sensations brought on by basking in such stifling heat?” His tone was more frustrated than he meant it to be.
“I thought it would be light and cooling, Saer. Not all of us are gifted with the ability to enchant our clothing.” She narrowed her eyes at him, and wondered if every item he was wearing was enchanted.. She quickly snapped out of her musings “An unfortunate error on my part, I hadn’t taken into account the lack of breeze, or the…” 
“Stickiness?” He said, focusing intently on dabbing her neck and chest with the flannel and not meeting her eyes.
“The humidity. Yes.” 
He took a break from his attentions and discarded the flannel, to take a leisurely sip of his drink. The droplets of condensation cascaded down the glass like tiny beads of sweat. Tav couldn't help but watch, a pang of envy stirring within her as she observed the icy water slip downwards and through his fingers. There was too much electric heat here, strung out in the very air, no amount of cool water would save her. She needed to be swathed by him, to smother the flames until they burnt out into ash. Even then, she was certain there would be embers enough to fan back to roaring flame at just one breathy word from him. She was doomed kindling.
The soft clink of ice against glass filled the air as he drank, his gaze never wavering from hers. With intent, he parted his lips slightly, allowing a single ice cube to slide into his mouth. She couldn't tear her eyes away as he savoured it, rolling it around his mouth with his tongue.
“Most refreshing.” He breathed, after a long, heavy swallow,  “Could I tempt you with a sip?” 
“I..Maybe.. This heat has caused quite a desperate thirst. Although I notice you have only brought one glass. How impolite of you” She dropped her fan to the ground in vexation, stupid thing was not doing anything to help. There was no saving her now.
He smirked and bowed his head slightly. “Not to worry, dear lady.” His eyes darkened and his voice became a heated command. “Open your mouth for me”
At first there was shock, but then without question she did as she was told, like a girl entranced. With a deft movement of his fingers, he plucked another ice cube from his glass and placed it delicately on her waiting tongue. 
Tav saw a chance and took it.
Before he could withdraw his hand, she wrapped her fingers around his wrist, and the surprise in his eyes lit her like a firework. She burned for these moments, for any slip in his resolve, any evidence behind the refinery and politeness that there were things she could do that would shock him. If there was a crack in his armour, she would slip in like water and drown him in sin.
Locking eyes with him, she held his gaze steady as she took control. With a boldness she hadn't known she possessed, she leaned forward and enveloped his fingers in her mouth, sucking gently and letting the ice cube melt against her tongue in a sweet rush of cold. It was a calculated move, a daring play, and as she released his hand, a flicker of satisfaction fluttered in her eyes. The game was afoot, and she was changing the rules. 
She let go of his fingers, and smiled innocently. “How right you are as always, Mr.Dekarios. Most refreshing.” She lilted, still sucking on the remnants of the ice in her mouth. 
He had suddenly lost his footing. The blood that was keeping him focused and leading their little game had suddenly re-routed elsewhere, and he was struggling to compose thoughts. He had no words, so actions would have to do.
He drew closer to her, the space between them shrinking, and he reached out his hand to trace a delicate path from the warmth of her flushed cheek, along the elegant curve of her jaw, down to the hollow of her throat. There, just above the gentle rise and fall of her bosom, he noticed a glistening bead of sweat, which he captured with his fingertip. Bringing it to his lips, he savoured it, and made a noise of growling satisfaction. Her breath hitched beautifully in response.
"It appears you're still uncomfortably warm. I'd hardly be a gentleman if I allowed you to suffer like this." With a languid sip of his drink, he popped another ice cube into his mouth. 
“You are no…”  
He aimed to catch off guard before she could finish. He closed what little gap was left between them and all playfulness burned away in the heat, leaving nothing but desperation. Fuck games, fuck dancing around each other, and fuck that ridiculous silk dress she was wearing. She had won their game, and her prize would be for him to take her the way he had been wanting to for the entire summer. 
His glass fell to the ground with no thought at all, and he grabbed at her waist. Pushing her back against the tree and pinning her there with a leg between her thighs. He finally earned a gasp of surprise from her, as he pushed his lips against her throat, and pressed the ice cube against her pulsing skin with his tongue. 
The noise she made was tantalisingly balanced between relief and desire, and he kept the ice firmly against her as he moved it further down her neck, mimicking the trail of sweat his finger had traced earlier. He delighted in the way her skin prickled as the ice caressed her. She was divine. He wanted to tease her until she lost all of her brazen stares and cutting banter, and all that was left was a puddle of a woman. He wanted to undo her the way he would her clothes, and watch her fall apart under his hands, his tongue, the push of his hips…
"Someone... Will..." Her voice came out in gasping pleas as he continued caressing her with the ice. "Find us..." He needed to remove that damn corset soon; restricted breathing wasn't conducive to the way he wanted to hear her cry out for him— completely unbound. A fleeting desire crossed his mind to restrain her in other ways, at other times. But for now, he simply needed to see how the heat had flushed her body, with as little material between them as possible.
“You think I would allow anyone else to see you like this? I am not a man who shares his treasure.” His cocky little grin made a slight reappearance as he pulled his lips away from her damp skin to meet her eyes and offer some cooling sincerity. “A spell has been cast, no one will see nor hear us. You are safe with me, my dream. Always.”
He lost himself to a moment of softness, and caressed her face with total adoration.
“I have craved the taste of you all summer. The sun itself could not burn me in the way you have. I am a scorch mark, I am the cindered ashes of all restraint. You are my sun. And no one else will gaze upon you the way I will.”
There was no response adequate to match the sudden delicacy of his words, leaving Tav momentarily speechless. In that fleeting moment of enraptured, adoring silence, Gale misunderstood her reaction, his beautiful face falling with concern, fearing he had unwittingly caused her distress.
“Tell me you do not desire me, that this soft heat inflaming you is not at least partly caused by your feelings for me. Tell me I have imagined your eyes searching for me, your playful need for my hands on you as we dance, and I will leave it at this. I will have spent a summer loving you, and it will have been the brightest and warmest of all my seasons.” 
He loved her. The air suddenly felt lighter. He was the breeze she had been craving. 
Her bright smile cracked through the initial shock of his confession, and relief swept over him like a tide. “I know you have a vivid imagination, Mr. Dekarios. But put it away, it is not needed here. I have attended each event only in the hope of being in your presence. It seems we both have had a summer well spent.” She kissed him then; sweetly, lovingly and he laughed enough for the crinkles between his eyes to appear. 
It did not take long for the damned dress to be torn from the skin of her sweat-slicked body. For the corset to be ripped from its bindings. For the softness of her breasts to find their place against his tongue, nipples peaking as though the heat didn’t exist, his hot breath and cool tongue creating a heady mix of magic which made her skin sing. 
Tomorrow, there would be rough marks on her back from the bark of the tree - but for now the slight pain only added to the overwhelming sensations which crawled their way over her body, her sweat mingling with his as he tore off his shirt and pressed himself against her. Caging her against the trunk. His skin was cool against hers, and steam danced between them as though melted steel was being forged by cool water. He was hard, she could feel it. 
His tongue flattened at her skin of her neck and her breasts, and licked away the lust-induced sweat his affection had caused. The fresh, salty taste may as way have been laced with liquor for the effect it was having on him. She tasted of sweet wine with the faint hint of salt. It was subtle, but he needed something richer. His attention moved downwards, and It was not long till he reached that most sacred place, where he had been aching to lose himself in scent and taste. He took his time and inhaled her. Using his nose to caress her sweet spot as he relished in the full-bodied flavour of her. 
As soon as his mouth began lavishing her, she realised he had somehow extended the cooling enchantment to his tongue. Her head was thrown back against the tree in ecstasy, the press of his mouth against her quickly becoming too much for her to handle. There was a brief moment of self-consciousness, where she worried about how the heat of the day would affect her taste. But the worry was soon lost, the thought drowned out by the sound of his appreciation and the realisation that he was stroking himself as he devoured her. 
He was dedicated in his endeavour, although no amount of skin-tingling magic would be able to balm the fire coursing through her veins. She thought she would never cool, that she would be a woman on fire for the rest of her love-fuelled days. The sensation was mesmeric, and she could not remember a sweeter sensation than this man on his knees in front of her, face buried between her legs and using his tongue to caress her with such enthusiasm she felt as though she would fall apart. And fall apart she did. It was euphoric, and her hands gripped his hair fiercely as she crashed over rocks in reckless pleasure.  
When he came back up to meet her he was breathless and lust-drunk, giddy as a school-boy and stoked as a bonfire.  “There has never been a sweeter taste than you, my love.” He kissed her then, languidly, passionately - intent on sharing the riches of his exploration. Tav could taste herself in his kiss. They may as well have been sharing wine between their lips. 
“If you don’t fuck me soon, Gale, I swear I will combust.”
He laughed at this. At the desperation, at the slight annoyance in her voice, at the fact this was the first time she had ever said his given name and she had thrown it at him as a demand to push her against the tree and bury himself inside her. What a woman. 
He needed no further invitation; shedding the confines of his breeches, he pressed himself slowly into her warmth, and she made the most delicious groaning sound he had ever heard. This woman could drive him to madness, and thankfully he was aware that his earlier attentions ensured he need not be overly gentle. Knowing that his endurance would be short-lived, thanks to the fervour he had stoked within himself while bringing her to climax against his tongue, he abandoned all pretense of restraint. Together they were primal, the tension that had been building between them releasing in pure, carnal desire.  
Though a gentleman might have exercised more self-control, such decorum was a luxury he couldn't afford in the presence of such irresistible temptation. Stripped of his clothes, he found himself as vulnerable to the unrelenting heat of the day as Tav, and soon, his focused, determined passion ignited a sheen of sweat upon his skin.
Tav’s payback could not have been any sweeter, as soon as she noticed the sweat trickling down his neck she took her chance and licked it from his bronzed, silken skin. His response was a delicious, low moan and his rhythm faltered into something more urgent, unbound. His grip tightening, one of his hands found its way to rest gently against her throat so he could feel the deep moans rumbling against his palm as he fucked her.
“I love you” She breathed. And that’s all it takes. He is suddenly hurtling over a precipice and into sweet, tight oblivion. 
They both collapse onto the ground, sweaty, burnt-out, euphoric. And they fall into uninhibited laughter as they realise they can hear the band playing a jaunty tune in the distance, and the chatter of the ever-growing crowd is closer than they initially thought.
“You are still hidden from prying eyes, my dream.” Gale offered reassurance as he kissed her head. “And I will conjure up some suitable clothing for you, don’t worry.”
“That is most generous of you Saer, but please - by the Gods, no corset and no silk.”
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storiesofsvu · 3 days
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It's Bingo Time!!
I usually do some kind of bingo for my birthday/spring and I figured it'd be fun to do one again this year. Though the timeline may be different, we'll see lol.
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Prompts are all spring/summer themed or smut. Any and all of them can be made as suggestive as you’d like, you don’t need to keep the smut fics to the smut prompts!
Submissions can be anything! A mood board, headcanons, drabbles, gif sets, a one shot, a mini series/collection including all the prompts, social media au’s, whatever you want!!
The rest of the rules are under the cut!
Prompts can be made into any genre, make it super spicy, super fluffy, or heartbreaking. Just make sure to include any and all appropriate warning at the top and in the tags!!
Fics can be a ship, reader insert, an OC, whatever you want! This is for you to have some fun and get creative!
Accepted Fandoms:
-Anything and Everything!! Yes!! I am always wide open to every fandom out there! It does not need to be something I write for, regularly read or even know what it is! It’s your choice!
Some examples:
Law and Order (svu, oc, og, ci),Criminal Minds, 911, MCU, One Chicago, NCIS, Grey’s Anatomy, OUAT, CAOS, Private Practice, Abbott Elementary and everything and anything in between!
Rules!
You must tag me @storiesofsvu and use the hastag #kbdaybingo2024 on each creation. There’s a chance I will put together a masterlist (and if I do I likely won’t until it’s all over)
Bingo begins May 1st and runs all the way to June 27th
Only post ONE creation PER DAY, and only one square per creation
No under age oc’s/yn’s
Tag all and every warning appropriately at the top of the fic
Anything over 1000 words MUST be under a readmore
Please appropriately tag your characters! I don’t want to see a list of side characters who have one line or are only mentioned when it’s a specific character x reader fic!
For each fic you write, you’ll earn a ballot and at the end I’ll do a draw and there will be a winner!! (don’t ask me what the prize is yet lol)
Everyone is welcome to participate! (anyone submitting or reading smut must be over 18!!)
If you have any questions feel free to message me!!
___________
tagging some people I think might be interested!
@whiteberryx @rustyzebra @iamnotoriginalphil @happenstnces @bullet-prooflove @hotchfiles @prentiss-theorem @scorpsik @thatesqcrush @witches-unruly-heart @polkadotpenguin16 @escapingrealtiylovinginsanity @waitingfortheendtocome @five-bi-five-mind @demonicbaby666 @baubeautyandthegeek @safficranger @valentinesfrog @milfandh0ney @asolitaryrose3 @alexblakegf @hotchs-big-hands @just-a-torn-up-masterpiece @mxmmyprentiss @alexblakeisgay @jordanstark007 @chestnutninny @maximoffcarter @lizdonnelly @v3nusxsky
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kazoologist · 3 days
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Every Current Formula 1 Driver But I Decided They Were All Bugs
No Thoughts, Head Empty, Only Insects I Enjoyed From My Single Entomology Class Several Years Ago. Sorry to folks from outside the states. Most of these are like. my local critters.
Max Verstappen - Appalachian Jewelwing, Calopteryx angustipennis I have no reasoning behind this one. He just gives me the vibes of a damselfly kinda man.
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Sergio Pérez - Synoeca Cyanea, a species of warrior wasp, or just the Synoeca genus again, literally no justification besides he's on the dark blue team and I just really like these wasps. Please read the Synoeca wikipedia page. they are SO cool.
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Lewis Hamilton - Violet Carpenter Bee, Xylocopa violacea fashionable! cool lookin bee!
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George Russell - Blue Hawker, Aeshna cyanea
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Charles Leclerc - Cattle Killer/Cow Killer, Dasymutilla occidentalis (letting my south midwestern hick jump OUT here. most folks call em velvet ants)
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Carlos Sainz - Red Admiral, Vanessa atalanta
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Lando Norris - Walker's Cicada, Megatibicen pronotalis this is NOT meant to be a drag I actually love these freakishly loud animals but he just gives bright green cicada energy.
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Oscar Piastri - Green Carpenter Bee, Xylocopa aerata cop out? yeah. good bee and something that feels correct? yes.
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Fernando Alonso - Mourning Cloak, Nymphalis antiopa i love these fuckin bugs. absolute freaks of nature. they live for like a full year and they're always wandering around and getting up to something. plus they're very distinguished.
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Lance Stroll - Common Buckeye, Junonia coenia I'm not even gonna elaborate on this one.
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Valtteri Bottas - Eastern Cicada Hawk, Sphecius speciosus I just think they're neat!
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Zhou Guanyu - Ebony Jewelwing, Calopteryx maculata blatant favoritism here. The ebony jewelwing is perhaps my all time favorite bug from home :) (its also v stylish)
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Esteban Ocon - Chinese Mantis, Tenodera sinensis a noble creature that frequently scares the life out of me when i find one outside my window. Why the fuck are you so long. I appreciate u anyway.
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Pierre Gasly - European Field Cricket, Gryllus campestris he just *feels* a bit crickety. Idk what to tell u man.
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Kevin Magnussen - Halloween Beetle (or in America, the Japanese Lady Bug), Harmonia axyridis the most determined little bastard in the animal kingdom. They WILL get into your apartment through that microscopic sliver in the window.
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Nico Hulkenberg - Green June Beetle, Cotinis nitida idk dude he just serves local scarab
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Daniel Ricciardo - Black-And-Yellow Mud Dauber, Sceliphron caementarium im sure you are all noticing how much i love wasps by now. i was SO brave not making this a wasp only post. if ur american and a hick (hey girl(gn) hey) you'll know these guys From Constantly Being In Your Car's Inner Workings
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Yuki Tsunoda - Bullet Ant, Paraponera clavata tiny but mighty!!!!! (short king solidarity)
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Alex Albon - Great Black Wasp, Sphex pensylvanicus yet more blatant favoritism for my faves. Yes this post is so i can assign the williams boys and zg my fave types of local bugs. Anyway. this is one of the best wasps in the world. if u see her irl please stop for a moment to appreciate her. she's usually a docile species but she is very big and i love her. (good hunter too)
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Logan Sargeant - Blue Dasher, Pachydiplax longipennis the ultimate late spring and all of summer insect of america. voted america's sweetheart of every local body of water eight millionth year in a row!!!! one of the best dragonflies in the country and i am serious!!! if u live in north america this summer, find a LAKE, a POND, A RIVER, perhaps even a CREEK!!!!!! A POOL WILL EVEN GET YOU! you'll find these folks. at current you might catch mating flight season!!! anyway. these are crazy good hunters and they're a beautiful little baby blue shade. anyway. logan and the rest of williams should go huntin for these when he gets back to florida. think it would fix em.
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reidfucker · 16 hours
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mitski songs that make me think of reid + a specific lyric
spencer reid is very mitski. but these were the first to come to mind. i do not take criticism.
- working for the knife
honestly, the entire song reminds me of reid, but this in particular:
I always thought the choice was mine
And I was right, but I just chose wrong
I start the day lying and end with the truth
That I'm dying for the knife
- liquid smooth
I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too
I'm at my highest peak, I'm ripe
About to fall
How I feel this river rushing through my veins
With nowhere else to go, it circles 'round
- class of 2013
Mom, would you wash my back?
This once, and then we can forget
And I'll leave what I'm chasing
For the other girls to pursue
Mom, am I still young?
Can I dream for a few months more?
- i don't smoke
Just don't leave me alone
Wondering where you are
I am stronger than you give me
Credit for
If your hands need to break
More than trinkets in your room
You can lean on my arm
As you break my heart
- abbey
again, the entire song is very reid, but:
I am something
I have been something
I was born something
What could I be?
There is a light that I can see
But only, it seems, when there's darkness in me
There is a dream that I sometimes see
That only appears in the dark of sleep
- i bet on losing dogs
Will you let me, baby, lose
On losing dogs
I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place
By the ring
Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down
I wanna feel it
I bet on losing dogs
I always want you when I'm finally fine
- the deal
Then of course, nothing replied, nothing speaks to you in the night
And I walked my way home, there was no one in sight
Save a bird perched upon a streetlight, watchin' me
So, I stopped and let it watch 'til I found that it said
"Now I'm taken, the night has me
You won't hear me singin'
You're a cage without me
Your pain is eased, but you'll never be free for
Now I'm taken, the night has me"
- fireworks
this is perhaps one of the reid-est. here's the particular lyric:
One morning this sadness will fossilize
And I will forget how to cry
I'll keep going to work and you won't see a change
Save perhaps a slight gray in my eye
I will go jogging routinely
Calmly and rhythmically run
And when I find that a knife's sticking out of my side
I'll pull it out without questioning why
- i don't like my mind
again, the entire song is reid, but this is my pick:
I don't like my mind, I don't like being left alone in a room
With all its opinions about the things that I've done
So, yeah, I blast music loud, and I work myself to the bone
And on an inconvenient Christmas, I eat a cake
- first love / late spring
very cliché, but i HAD to include it! here:
And I was so young when I behaved 25
Yet now, I find I've grown into a tall child
And I don't wanna go home
Let me walk to the top of the big night sky
- there's nothing left for you
You could touch fire
You could fly
It was your right
It was your life
And then it passed
To someone new
It'll keep passin' on
Long after you
- nobody
And I don't want your pity
I just want somebody near me
Guess I'm a coward
I just want to feel alright
- because dreaming costs money, my dear
I once lived in the sea
Bring me to your ear, you can hear
The tide where I used to be
Though now I'm but a shell
- a pearl
Sorry, I don't want your touch
It's not that I don't want you
Sorry, I can't take your touch
It's just that I fell in love with a war
Nobody told me it ended
And it left a pearl in my head
And I roll it around every night
Just to watch it glow
Every night, baby, that's where I go
- real men
Real men keep cool in the face of a fire
Go down with the ship
And real men don't eat
'Cause they're above that, damn it
Oh, I'm gonna be a real man
- crack baby
It's been a long, hard 20 year summer vacation
Both these 20 years tryna fill the void
Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you had it once
And you know that you want it back
Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you're needing it
And you know that you need it bad
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[ a day in the sun ― albedo & kafka ] "happy birthday, my love. may the sun shine in the sky only for you on this day - shall we take a walk?"cw. gn!reader, fluff, modern!au, established relationships, reader wears dresses, petnames (dear, baby), just some sickly sweet fluff overall, ooc kafka
aquamarine's findings. happy birthday to my dearest little dove, @heiayen !! i hope this day proves to be fruitful and kind to you. you deserve the world !! ♡
with the sun shining bright in a seemingly endless blue sky and spring in full bloom, ALBEDO had plenty of ideas for this special day - it was just his hardest decision deciding which one to go with or even more so, creating an itinerary just for you. unfortunately for him the moment klee had found it your birthday was approaching, she begged him to let her in on the plans. you truly are adored by that small girl.
your toes sink into fine grains of sand, warm beneath your steps with two blondes at your side. one is bouncing, her small hand grasping yours as she tries to tug you along the length of the beach. in her spare hand is a melting ice lolly you wish she would pay a few seconds more attention to now that it's starting to drip down her hand.
the other blond somehow can't contain the small smile on his face as he watches the pair of you, the way you're laughing and yet still sending worried glances at klee's ice lolly. he can imagine the sticky mess that she's going to create the moment she reaches for something - or someone - with that hand later.
"klee, give them a break or you'll hurt their arm," your lover tries to reason with the excited child who - at the prospect of hurting you - quickly lets go of your hand to run ahead, squealing as she kicks up sand, "are you okay, dear? she can be overwhelming."
"how often do you bring her to the beach? she acts like she's never seen it in her life." you find yourself musing as the young girl crouches down to inspect something. your curiosity peeks, wandering to crouch with her as you tilt your head. albedo watches the pair of you in intrigue, the way you are both tilting your heads like confused puppies.
albedo refrains from attempting to defend his little sister's overexcited actions and instead peers to see what has got the two of you in awe. a pile of neatly collected seashells in an array of shapes and colours, embedded into the sand. klee gasps, a chubby finger pointed at a particular pastel purple seashell and you also let out an excited noise - albeit a little quiet.
his blue eyes soften, that small smile from earlier widening on his face as mid-length blond locks tickle his eyelashes, the sea breeze drifting through them and creating an even more messy appearance. no matter how long he's been dating you, he can't seem to stop admiring you. his eyes dance over how the breeze carries your hair and the pretty summer dress you decided to wear for today, how your jewellery compliments every aspect of your outfit... how did he get so lucky?
he almost chuckles at his thoughts, his cheeks warming considerably and he wonders if he could blame the weather should klee's keen eyes notice. the artist is undeniably in love with you, after all you're the source material of a lot of his works now. he's familiar with your every crevice and detail, familiar with painting them delicately onto his canvas.
he wouldn't change that for the world when your sparkling eyes return to him, a happy smile on his face as you hold up a seashell to him, exclaiming excitedly as you fawn over something so simple and yet so treasurable.
you knew very well how your girlfriend's job worked and whilst you never interfered, you wished sometimes that she could spare you a glimpse of time outside of what her boss' 'scripts' leave you with. that's not to say she was a bad partner - oh no. regardless of that slightly insufferable teasing attitude she has, the one she always brings to the table in a light-hearted manner, you knew KAFKA loved you. perhaps more than she's willing to convey with words.
kafka follows her scripts intricately, never missing a detail right up until the last second. these control her days, creating schedules upon schedules she's never faltered to argue against nor break the habit. yet she fails to tell you that in the days leading up to your birthday, she'd been very much planning to do just that.
"you look beautiful," she chimes when you enter the lounge, pausing in your steps when your eyes meet hers. she quirks a brow, amused by the way your eyes widen in surprise, "what is it, baby?"
you squint, hesitant to approach your girlfriend - what did she have in mind? what was going on? usually at this hour, the shared house you live in together was filled with the melodic sounds of kafka's classical music and in turn, her own violin. slowly, your confusion regarding the silence of the house settles in as to why your girlfriend was here and not in her study.
"did you forget your own birthday?" kafka raises to her feet, shaking her head as a light laugh escapes her lips, "oh dear, we can't be having that - definitely not today."
the woman saunters closer to you, slim hands drifting over the curves of your body in that sundress as she smiles coyly, eyes glinting in the reflection of the sun through the open window. there was never any telling what your girlfriend had planned, with the woman being exceptional at keeping her schemes concealed and hidden safely in her mind. oh, how you'd pay to be inside her mind for a mere day.
"of course i didn't," you pout, awkwardly avoiding her gaze as she presses her forehead to yours. her hands settle on your hips, a hum coming from her chest as she examines your behaviour, "you're not-"
"in my study?" she cuts you off, finishing off your thoughts as your eyes snap up to meet hers again. they're glittering, filled with mirth and amusement as her fingers tap at your hips, shaking her head before she presses a soft kiss to your lips. it's demanding despite how soft it is, her grip on your waist tightening if only for a few seconds.
when you pull away for a moment of air, kafka hums yet again and straightens up, taking hold of your hand in her gloved one. the feel of leather sends a shiver down your spine, contrasting to the cared-for hands beneath them. the ones you knew were very much soft, gentle, smooth - and they knew your body equally as much, every inch and fibre of your being.
"the sun's out and i intend to spend this day in it - with you so come on. we're going on a walk and later you can choose dinner. today, elio's scripts are off the table."
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the archives' notifications. @bisexuawolfsalt, @lovingluxury, @auroratumbles, @ryuryuryuyurboat, @soleillunne
@zamorazz, @zworllyx
© theaquamarinearchives 2024 ; reblogs appreciated. do not re-upload, translate, etc. my works on any platforms or feed any of my works to ai.
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ereborne · 1 month
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Song of the Day: March 25
"Groovy Little Summer Song" by James Otto
#song of the day#it's not at all summer yet but it is spring!!#it's chilly when the wind blows and the dew-damp sticks around until noon but the sun is out and the sky is maybe not clear but close!#spring!!!!#I put my first early plantings in the garden today#I had planned for a bunch of marigolds but I got a different batch of flowers instead#so now what's down is rootings for a bunch of perennial flowers#sea holly and red-hot pokers and butterfly weed and hollyhocks#and then my little pea plants#I told Kelly I'd share pictures but for today it only looks like a square of dirt--I'll definitely share pics when my sprouts come in!!#beautiful beautiful garden times#summer of 2010 when this song came out was the first time in three-ish years I'd spent much continuous time with my family#my littlest siblings were old enough to be away from Mom for a while and still young enough to be lulled to sleep by the car#and Mom was very eager to be left home alone to sleep (and play this weird chicken bowling game she was briefly addicted to)#and so we went on a lot of long leisurely pointless car rides and we listed to a lot of#(I will never not hear this in my head) 96.9 The Kat! country music radio#and this got added to the short list of songs I sang to myself#it's so catchy!! cute fun moderately-bouncy little earworm and my voice cruises up and down it so easy#'when the days start gettin warmer / the sun starts sinkin slower / weekends go by faster / and beer starts tastin colder#wanna tune into a station / takes me on a soul vacation / hey there mister dj / come on won't you please play'#and crucially Dad did not mind this song--which could not be said for 'There Is No Arizona' by Jamie O'Neal#or (after I sang it approximately ninety million times) 'Just What I Do' by Trick Pony#we also had--this was very fun for me--we had exactly one CD we could play in the car (because it was stuck in the disk player)#and that was Joe Diffie's 'Third Rock From The Sun'#so many songs of absolute joy on that album. lucky as hell that Dad agreed because it meant we'd crank it up so loud#close my eyes and let the sun shine all red through my eyelids#sing some real dumbass enjoyable-as-all-getout songs at the top of my absolute voice#Dad laughing and singing along and the littles sleeping through the all of it like the precious babies they were#these are the songs of sunshine and pointless happiness! it's not summer but it will be! my garden doesn't have plants yet but it will!#sing a song!!
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it's gonna get up to 80° today... girl what.
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daesungindistress · 1 year
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GD's thoughts on Still Life's lack of promotions in 2022
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chirpsythismorning · 9 months
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Hey ! How are you ? I just saw a Video on Instagram and I wondered if what they say is true ?
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CvWDN3iMEQs/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
I really hope it’s not true … ( and I hope that the link works lol )
This is 100% false so don’t worry about it!
I do sort of pity these influencer/podcast types, who give their audience the impression they are valuable sources for information, when it’s clear they’re just using speculation from fans, as opposed to actual verified sources. Them throwing out stuff like this should make people question consuming their content at all honestly. Because the whole 2027 date was thrown out on Twitter by a fan account that was merely exaggerating to get people talking, and has literally not come from anywhere else. Literally nowhere. Predictably the exaggeration spread to people who don’t know much about what’s going on and they treated it like verified information.
I do know that sometimes depending on the subject, it can be difficult to navigate information and know what is true and what isn’t.
But to say Stranger Things 5 isn’t going to start filming until 2027, is so ill-informed it’s hilarious. A claim like this implies the strike won’t end for another two years, which literally nobody is anticipating it to last that long, let alone even a year.
When it comes to Stranger Things specifically, the writer’s strike started in May, right before filming for ST5 was set to begin officially in June. And even despite the strike(s), for the last 3 months, set designers and the like have been working on preparing for filming with pre-production duties. So they have literally been ready to film for roughly two months now and are just using this time on hiatus to their advantage if anything, since they don’t have to worry about rushing bc filming is happening simultaneously like they usually do.
This means that whenever the strike ends officially, like for real, production for Stranger Things 5 is very likely going to be ready to start soon after that. Not the day of or even days after, but likely within weeks at most.
What it will really come down to is working out availability for the cast members since they have to organize a new schedule that aligns with the timetable they’re dealing with post strike, in contrast to what the original plan was.
The original timetable for ST5 filming was June 2023-June 2024. Let’s just say hypothetically the strike ends officially in mid September. In that case, filming for ST5 would likely start within weeks after that, some time in October. If that were to happen, filming would likely go from October 2023-October 2024, still giving them a year of filming like they originally planned before the strike(s).
For reference ST4 finished filming in September 2021 and premiered in May & July 2022. In the case filming would start in September/October, we’d likely be looking at another Summer release for the final season in 2025.
So, if you’re hoping for a 2024 release, don’t hold your breath. In fact just let that go because it’s not happening.
Once the strike is over it’ll be a matter of making sure everyone’s available and schedules align in areas that are necessary. Making sure actors that have scenes together are on set at the same time is going to be a top priority, as well as just the main cast in general aligning their availability with their other potential projects outside of ST (like David who was also going to be filming Thunderbolts simultaneously with ST in Atlanta), so that it works for everyone and can be done in a timely manner. Then making sure supporting actors fit into that as well despite them having less screen time, aligning with each other is important.
I’m optimistic things could end sooner than we were anticipating, like I know some people were saying the strikes could go until January next year. Even now though I still don’t really want to fully get my hopes up because negotiations could continue for weeks upon months if the guilds and studios are still far apart.
Let’s just continue to keep a close eye on what’s going on before getting ahead of ourselves one way or another.
But for some good news, the AMPTP (the studios) have reached out to the WGA to meet on Friday officially for negotiations again. They have not met since before the strike began in May so this is very good news. That alone should be a good sign that the strike is very very unlikely to last another 2 years, so you can just ignore that 2027 rumor, it is baseless!
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androideql · 5 months
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do u have an opinion on . yakumond re: bugs my mind is in factions, warring . edmond brave, yakumo baby. BUT yakumo farm boy. edmond city kid. yakumo destroying farm pests with his bare hands? out of habit? it's on SIGHT?? but nothing scares vice captain, right? so what if yakumond just turns my trope upside down and NEITHER of them are scared of bugs. what then. what do i do
I spent a while thinking how to reply to this ask. And. OK. Bear with me.
I honestly don't see either of them being afraid of bugs. I can see them not liking them, with Edmond being a more indiscriminate "bugs have no place in this house and should be squashed" compared to Yakumo's "will remorselessly kill pests but not harmless insects."
That being said... I kinda like the idea of Edmond having a very specific weakness to just one (1) bug and being utterly fucking embarrassed about it, and Yakumo (being the anxious baby he is) somewhat mirroring Edmond's response to it despite usually remaining very calm. They can be a disaster together. They've got that potential.
In fact, I liked the idea enough that I have this deleted short scene from a fic that I'm working on and that I will be releasing it into the wild now. Mind you, it's a draft so it's way more functional that it is polished.
------
“Sir Edmond, why don’t you go to sleep right away? It's already very late.”
Edmond looked up from the blank paper. At the lack of a desk, a small wooden crate he'd found here in the hayloft would work just fine. Until he saw that he'd finished writing the letter, he was not going to be able to calm his nerves enough to sleep. It didn't matter that it could be done the next morning. Why leave it for later if it could be done now?
“I’ll be finished in a few more paragraphs, don't worry,” he said, dipping the pen in the inkwell. "You shouldn't stay up longer than necessary, either. Is something holding you up?"
"Ah, well..." Yakumo looked at the lamp on the crate. It would be rather difficult to sleep with it still on, and he couldn't ask it be turned off if Edmond was still writing. "It's fine. I can wait a little longer. I'll make sure the tent is properly set up."
"Haven't you already done that twice?"
There wasn't much else left to do here. Maybe he could go outside or look around the barn for things that might be useful next morning? His eyes tried to look around. It would be rather difficult to do this in the dark... Besides, he didn't want to do anything that would be too distracting. Edmond was very particular about this letter.
As Yakumo looked around from where he was sitting, he could see something scuttling up one of the sides of the crate. He frowned at the presence of the insect. People commonly referred to those as "claw traps." They had a crab claw-like pincer and a nasty habit of biting people in their sleep and hiding in boots. What if there were more around? Thankfully, he'd had the foresight to bring some repellant.
Yakumo crawled closer to the tent, where he'd left his belongings. He rummaged around his bag for the repellent and something to kill the insect with. However, Edmond was so absorbed in writing his letter that he hadn't noticed yet. It was probably better to warn him before he got bitten.
"Sir Edmond, there's a claw trap going up your desk."
At the mention of the bug Edmond haphazardly grabbed all his things and scrambled backward in panic, spilling black ink on the wooden floor, splashing some of it on his shirt.
Yakumo's heart made a jump. He dropped his bag and reacted without thinking.
Squish, crack. He immediately squashed the bug with his bare hand.
For a moment, there was silence. He stared at his hand, at Edmond, who looked way too tense over a single bug. When Yakumo realized what he had done, a shudder ran up his spine. He lifted his hand. It was wet and crunchy, and he probably just stuck the claw into his palm because it hurt. He looked at it. Yes. There it was. Like a massive splinter.
He was more worried about how Edmond hadn't taken a single breath ever since he'd killed this thing, though.
"S-Sir Edmond, is everything alright?" He asked as he shook the remains of the claw trap off his hand.
Snapping out of his panicked state, Edmond nervously cleared his throat, his cheeks burning red. He looked aside and took a deep breath with an angry expression on his face.
"Y-Yes... I... Oh, how embarrassing... I need a moment."
With a nod of acknowledgment, Yakumo rushed to wash his hands in the basin, just the get the gooey and feeling off his palm. Now he was going to have to go back into the house to change the water. He was not about to wash his face with cold insect soup when he woke up in the morning.
The act of cleaning and removing the pincer from his palm helped him calm down and think about what just happened. He turned around to look at Edmond, who examined the stained sleeve of his shirt with an air of inconvenienced embarrassment. That ink stain was not coming out, and he probably knew that.
"Umm... Do you have something in particular against these insects? I've never seen you react like that to any others before..."
For sure, they'd been toiling in the fields for most of the day, and this wasn't the first time they'd dealt with a bug problem before. Usually speaking, Edmond didn't hesitate. He looked at the offending creature with disgust and slammed the first hard thing he could find against them, making it abundantly clear that, while he didn't like them, he could handle them perfectly fine on his own. While claw traps were unpleasant, this seemed a bit excessive.
Looking tired all of a sudden, Edmond took a long breath and let out a deep sigh.
"I don't like those."
"Ah... Well, yes? It's... not hard to see that at all..." He waited for Edmond to continue, and he was about to nervously change the topic and run away to change the water when Edmond cleared his throat.
"We saw a lot of them back when I was still in training. There was one summer when they were everywhere, wherever we set camp. They barely let us sleep. I've had an... aversion to them ever since. But I can handle them on my own next time. I just need a second or two to calm down."
The last part was a quick attempt to save face, but Yakumo wouldn't have minded it at all if he had to get rid of one of these pests again. He merely hoped Edmond's panic was a little less contagious next time.
Hoping to help Edmond retain some of his dignity for now, Yakumo tried to make the atmosphere a little less stilted by subtly shifting the subject away from how Edmond felt about these insects.
"You must have stayed within the Light Territory that summer then?"
Edmond gave Yakumo a surprised look.
"How do you know that?"
"Claw traps can only really survive there. The Water and Wood territories are too humid for them."
Hold on... Yakumo's brow furrowed deeply once he realized what he'd just said.
"How did it get here, then?" Edmond asked. And he was right. They were right in the middle of the Water territory, weren't they? But Yakumo didn't really have an explanation.
"M-Maybe they're mutating...?"
"No."
Edmond snapped at the suggestion. Yakumo reflexively lowered his head in response.
"Um..."
"Don't make me even entertain that idea." He stood up, slightly agitated. "I'm going the search the hayloft in case there are more. I won't be able to sleep otherwise."
"W-We have repellent myrrh. We can burn some inside the tent. It doesn't smell bad or anything..."
His voice was barely a whisper, but the night was already silent in the village and the fields. Edmond had no problem picking up what he was saying, or the tone in which it was said.
"... I apologize. My tone was too harsh."
Yakumo had never heard Edmond talk to him like that before. There was no doubt that these bugs were a touchy subject. He chuckled nervously.
"It's... fine. Don't worry. I understand."
With his cheeks turning red once again, Edmond let out some unintelligible noise that maybe, in some corner of his mind, had been words at some point. Eventually, he gave up, huffing in frustration.
"Tha-Thank you for handling it..."
"Oh. I... could do it again if we find another one."
Not enthused by the idea of seeing more of them, but still looking somewhat relieved, Edmond's voice and face softened just a little.
"I seriously wish we didn't... But I'd be quite grateful if you could."
#the reason why i waited to answer this was to make sure I was not going to use the scene at all#turns out that yeah i don't need it#should i put this in the main tag?#new fic coming to you...#... eventually#just bug squashing for now#i couldn't think of a good name for the insect also but it's not like i have to anymore#ok so here's my thinking process:#i've known enough people in the military to make me think that Edmond probably had to put up with some shit as a new recruit or trainee#and that he probably has things that he really really doesn't like as a result#the klein kingdom probably has a bunch of natural nuisances depending on the season#but a trainee probably wouldn't be sent out in the middle of winter right away cause they don't have those survival skills yet#so if those first excursions happen in spring or summer... then bugs are a problem#and Edmond IS a noble anyway. he was probably not expecting that many bugs much less for them to be bite-y#and as for yakumo i just dont see him minding bugs as long as they don't sting#he basically grew up in a cave first and then in a farm; he's super used to them#some kid probably tried to put a spider in his shoe once to try to scare him and got a very underwhelming response for his efforts#i do think he gets nervous when he sees something venomous especially if it moves too quickly#and he probably gets easily startled by jumping spiders if he hasn't noticed them before they jump in front of him#but that's more him being a nervous mess in general and less about bugs#ok enough rambling#i can't do concise answers for shit im sorry
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stiltonbasket · 1 year
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Jingyi is dragging his slightly-older shufu a-zhan into trouble? Let's go and "liberate" some of grandma's red-bean buns, shufu! Let's go and bob around in lxc's hot springs like little dumplings! Clothes are for other baos! Cuddle ALL the bunnies! Pheasant-nap of one of lqr's flock and set it loose in the lanshi!
This is what led to both of them being stuck on gege duty with baby Jueying. When Jingyi complained, Lan Qiren informed him that he was four years old and thus had no business doing anything that would be unsafe to do around a crawling baby (at least indoors).
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generalb · 13 days
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I have breached making 10k in stardew I truly am The Farmer
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robinsnest2111 · 1 month
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what a weird dream
was on my way to see an obscure band somewhere further south, so I took the train. but I was stupid enough to not remember which compartment I was supposed to sit in (as the different wagons would later split off to go into different directions), also couldn't remember who I was supposed to go to the concert with so I couldn't shoot them a quick message and ask which part of the train they were on, then i couldn't remember where exactly the band was supposed to play so I couldn't go off of the city names listed on each wagon, then I also couldn't remember the name of the band so I couldn't point them out on a list of bands the train staff provided to me to help me figure things out...
all in all a very frustrating and anxiety inducing dream...
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I love you summer I love you trees full of leaves I love you warm evenings I love you light until 10pm I love you fireflies I love you cicadas I love you swimming weather I love you lake days I love you picnic weather i love you state fairs I love you farmers markets I love you fresh local fruit I love you wildflowers I love you warm sun on my skin I love you summer 💕💕💕
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feeisamarshmallow · 11 months
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anyways, wish me luck bc i'm doing something fun that really pushes me out of my comfort zone this week!!! it's always hard for me to know when to push myself and when to know my boundaries. i'm trying not to be too hard on myself if this ends up being Too Much, but also i'm trying to leave room for it to be fun, too! will update at the end of this week!!
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lambfromfield · 2 years
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currently thinking ab double life in summer. it is unbearably hot all of the time; the grass is thin and dying. the sky is cloudless and pale, and there is nothing to protect players from the heat except for a couple trees. most of those are gone by the first few days, and so soulmates must build escapes from the heat.
thinking about soulmates bringing each other water when the other’s off working, thinking about soulmates caring for their cows/sheep together bc the animals are hot, too. thinking about droughts, thinking about the necessary intimacy of not wearing excessive clothing bc it’s too hot, thinking about cuddling with your soulmate even DESPITE the heat. thinking about making a wide-brimmed hat for your soulmate, thinking about things like sunscreen and small pools of water that can bring so much minute joy to a pair.
thinking that when players go red it’s even hotter, like something boiling rests just under their skin at all times. thinking that nothing except killing is a salve to this sort of warmth. thinking thinking thinking
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