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kjack89 · 2 years

Text

hey whats up

For @themiserablesmonth Day 22: Greeting.

Modern AU, developing E/R.

Read on AO3.

The all-too-familiar notification noise sounded from Grantaire’s phone, and he heaved a sigh before rolling over on the couch to grab it. He was ninety percent sure he could feel himself losing brain cells as he scrolled through the unfortunate sea of nearly identical Grindr messages:

Hey what’s up

hey whats up

Hey, what’s up?

Well, at least that last one understood basic grammar.

He decided it was as good an option as any and clicked on the chat to send back an equally inane: Not much, you?

With that herculean effort completed, he tossed his phone down and rolled onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

He knew was Joly and Bossuet would say if they could see him. They’d tell him he was wallowing, and yeah, maybe he was, and sure, maybe his ex had been a massive douchebag, but at least he’d meant that Grantaire didn’t have to debase himself on Grindr.

“That’s not exactly a compelling reason to stay with someone,” Joly had pointed out once.

“Maybe not,” Grantaire had said. “But not all of us meet our soulmate at the age of 21, and you truly have no concept of how miserable hooking up and dating is these days.”

Of course, Grantaire reflected, still staring up at the ceiling, maybe miserable was the wrong word. Too strong a sentiment for the dull monotony of the – hey what’s up, not much you, looking for, top or bottom, dick pic, ass pic – exchanges that seemed to dominate the online dating world.

Banal was probably more accurate.

The Grindr noise sounded again and Grantaire sighed, reaching over to his phone to reply to whatever Mr. Correct Grammar had sent back.

Instead, he found a brand new message from user Revolution1832: Hey, have you made a plan to vote?

Despite himself, Grantaire was intrigued, and even more despite himself, he couldn’t quite stop the smile that lifted the corners of his mouth, a smile that only grew when he clicked on the guy’s profile and saw how hot he was.

He settled back against the couch as he typed out his response. I am fascinated to know what your response rate is.

He didn’t expect much of a response, if any, which is why he was shocked when the guy messaged back almost immediately. Honestly, better than when I officially text bank.

Grantaire snorted. Ok but I bet if you started off your official campaign texts with thirst traps of yourself you’d also get a better response rate

Again, he didn’t have to wait long for a response. Touché

Grantaire sat up a little straighter as he asked, Also does it count as a response if someone just sends you a dick pic?

Probably not, the guy messaged in reply, but I do count the one pic I got where a guy sent me a dick pic but he’d stuck his ‘I Voted’ sticker on it

Grantaire choked on air. Like the sticker on a banana?

Pretty much exactly like that, yeah.

Grantaire laughed out loud, shaking his head with something like wonder. Incredible.

This time, the pause between messages was slightly longer, just long enough for Grantaire to worry that it was the end of the conversation. But then Revolution1832 replied, Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you didn’t answer my original question.

Grantaire smirked. Sorry, I’m distracted by the banana dick image still, he demurred. What was the question?

Have you made a plan to vote?

Frankly, Grantaire had little intention of actually answering the question, which meant he needed to come up with a foolproof way to drive this guy absolutely crazy.

It was the only way he knew how to flirt.

The idea came to him in an instant, and he quickly typed, Oh is there some kind of election coming up?

…kindly tell me that’s a joke.

Grantaire was tempted to keep the ruse going, but decided to go for a bit of blunt honesty instead. How about you tell the DNC, DCCC, DSC and whoever the fuck else to stop emailing me 26 times an hour

Democracy is on the line, the guy replied after a moment, and Grantaire rolled his eyes.

Yeah and five bucks from me is not going to be what saves it.

Well, not that with that attitude.

Despite himself, Grantaire again laughed, his reply half written before he even realized that he hadn’t thought about the banality of Grindr once since this conversation started. I will pay you the five bucks if you can tell me with a straight face that the ‘average donation’ of $27 is going to save Beto O’Rourke from once again losing in Texas.

He only had the pictures the guy had posted to go off of, and he was smiling in all of them, but Grantaire could still imagine the way he scowled when he replied, Hey, it’s not like I’m the one personally sending you all these emails.

No you’re just harassing me in my safe space, Grantaire shot back.

Which was a stupid thing to say, and he supposed he deserved the derision-laden, Grindr is your safe space?

He rolled his eyes, a smile tugging again on the corners of his mouth. …ok, fair point. Have you noticed that dating has gotten progressively more terrible the older we get?

If the guy noticed his change of topics, he didn’t remark on it. No, but to be honest that’s because I don’t do a whole lot of dating.

That was an intriguing answer to encounter on a dating, or more accurately, hookup app, and Grantaire frowned slightly as he messaged back, Are you a hit it and quit it kind of guy?

My best friend Courfeyrac would land in the hospital with a busted gut if he saw the phrase ‘hit it and quit it’ used in relation to me, the guy replied. No, I just work a lot.

Is this considered work? Grantaire asked, even though he wasn’t sure he actually wanted to know the answer, given its potential impact on…well, whatever this was besides the best conversation he had ever had on Grindr.

The broader attempt at getting people to vote? the guy hedged. Technically. This conversation, though? Not so much.

Grantaire grinned. I’d apologize for distracting you from your work, but…

But you’re not actually sorry, the guy finished, and Grantaire’s grin widened. How well he already knew him.

Not even remotely.

Speaking of work, the guy continued, Are you ever going to answer my question?

Grantaire’s grin faded. No.

Why not?

There were a lot of very sensible things Grantaire could message in response to that, many reasons that were at least half-true, including but not limited to a very vocal refusal to believe in any political causes, but he found that for once, he didn’t want to obfuscate or lean on sarcasm. Which was an absolutely insane thing to think about a conversation he was having with a random guy on Grindr who he had never met and almost certainly never would, but Grantaire was fairly comfortable considering himself insane for much lesser things. Because then you might stop messaging me, and this is the fun I’ve had in longer than I care to admit.

The pause between messages probably only lasted thirty seconds or so, but to Grantaire, it felt like a lifetime. Then, finally: What makes you think I’m going to stop messaging you?

Well, that hadn’t been what he expected. The hundreds of other gay idiots you need to convince to vote? he supplied Not to mention you’re probably not even from here. You probably just changed your location settings to a battleground state, which is fine, I respect the hustle, but it does mean that this isn’t exactly going anywhere

Again, a pause that felt painfully long until the guy replied, You’re half-right, at least. I’m not from here. But I didn’t change my location settings. I’m out here working on the senate race

Grantaire made a face. So this may go somewhere, but only for the next two weeks?

Not necessarily, the guy replied. I don’t have anything lined up past November, and my lease runs through the end of the year. And it’s not like this state is going to be less of a battleground moving forward.

Grantaire snorted. You know most people flee from this state, not voluntarily move here and then decide to stay.

I haven’t decided to stay yet, the guy pointed out, and there was another pause before he added, You could give me a reason to, though.

Grantaire stared at his phone, his heartbeat pounding loudly in his ears. A reason to stay?

Yeah.

Like what?

As soon as he sent it, he knew what the answer was going to be, and he preemptively rolled his eyes before even reading the message: Like telling me your vote plan.

Your commitment to the message is honestly admirable.

I’ll pass that along to my comms team, they’ll be thrilled, the guy replied, and Grantaire could almost imagine how dry his voice sounded. But seriously, if I promise not to stop messaging you, will you tell me your vote plan?

Grantaire considered it for a moment. Sure.

Ok, so…

I don’t have one

Grantaire could imagine that at this moment, the guy was in the process of tearing half of his very pretty blond hair out. Why not?

He was so tempted to again keep the ruse going, but just like before, something got the better of him. In this case, a strange desire to put him out of his misery. Because I already voted.

Thank God. I don’t think I would’ve been able to hold up my promise not to stop messaging you otherwise.

Grantaire grinned. Yeah but I didn’t think to take a picture of my dick with my ‘I Voted’ sticker.

You know, the guy replied, I have a friend who works for the county board of elections.

Grantaire arched an eyebrow. Hell of a segue.

My point is that I can probably wrangle up some more ‘I Voted’ stickers. Grantaire again choked on absolutely nothing. If you’re interested, anyway.

…are you really using the idea of me putting an ‘I Voted’ sticker on my dick as some kind of come on?

That depends.

Grantaire’s brow furrowed. On what?

Is it working?

A slow grin stretched across Grantaire’s face, and he decided it was long past time to throw all caution to the wind. Do you want to meet up for a drink?

He held his breath until the next message came in. Tonight I can’t. I have a 6am start tomorrow. The candidate’s doing a press pop on the local morning news.

Grantaire refused to be deterred. What about tomorrow night? You bring the ‘I Voted’ sticker, I’ll bring, well…

Deal.

Grantaire let out the breath he’d been holding in a woosh. I’m Grantaire, by the way.

Enjolras. And I’m really looking forward to meeting you.

Yeah, Grantaire replied, his grin softening. So am I.

#exr #enjolras x grantaire #enjoltaire #enjolras #grantaire #fanfiction #les miserables #modern AU #texting #grindr #developing relationship #the miserables month 2022

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floralcrematorium · 2 months

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1, 10, aaand 4 :3

Thanks for the ask!!! I uh. Go on a big ramble so I'm throwing everything under the cut!

Do you relate to your favorite character(s)?

Yes and no.

My fondness for China and Norway isn't one based on their characters because I haven't fleshed them out (yet) in my head. I have no idea how to write for either of them! I genuinely would love to spend a day cooking, painting, or just talking with Yao. I yearn for platonic companionship and Yao isn't chaotic and we share similar interests. Our aesthetic interests are very different, but oh well!

I don't know what Lukas has to offer tbh, he's entirely eye candy to me (sobbing).

My fondness for France and Ukraine has to do with self imposed headcanons.

My Francis is honestly probably ooc -- but I don't care. I have taken these guys and run away with them. A lot of my Hetalia writing is Human AU because I have a hard time connecting with immortal creatures as someone who cannot see what even the next year of their own life looks like. I guess what Francis and I share is a fondness for food and art (like with Yao), but those aren't activities I would want to do with Francis. We can both be dramatic, I will over-dress just to go out with a friend, and we're both a bit pathetic. While my Francis isn't like early canon France (you know what I mean...), he's still a romantic. I am not.

I don't think it's a necessarily rare headcanon, but I see Miss Ukraine as fat. She's plus size to me and that's something we share. I've been wanting to write a Kateryna centric oneshot about the difficulties and mental struggles that come with shopping as a fat person, but I haven't been in a reading/writing mindset recently and this topic would be a bit taxing on me. One day, though!! I'm still formulating my characterization of her... CanUkr oneshot is STILL in development hell.

TLDR: Yes because I impose bits of myself onto Francis and Kateryna for RP and writing purposes and also for comfort. No because a good handful of my favorites (including some not named) are just little guys I'd like to put in a shoebox and shake around.

10. How long have you been in the fandom? What's your lore?

In 7th grade a friend told me I might like Hetalia because I liked geography and history was my strongest subject in school. I cannot remember when exactly I checked it out, but I definitely was into by Spring 2014. I literally have emails from back then of memes we exchanged...

My best friend and I met online at the end of that school year and we actually started talking because he played this video over skype screen share. Fast forward to the summer and I'm drawing, writing fic, and we made our Hetalia Instagram account. There were three of us. It was essentially just a repost account because we were all in middle school. I never really interacted with others from the fandom other than the two friends I ran the account with, both of whom I still talk to <3

Our instagram account died off sometime around 2018. We deleted it around 2020-2021.

I came back to Hetalia by a freak accident. I was going through my old google drive and rediscovered the three-way-POV fic my friends and I wrote and immediately ran into our group chat. It was a bad fic. Basically Hetalia in the setting of Outlast meets FNAF vibes. Yes, it was a Wattpad fic... (now deleted). We made the joke of rewriting it, but that thought only lasted for one night. Then out of curiosity I got back into listening to the official character songs, and that's what did it for me... (shoutout to "Aiyah, 4,000 Years," "Mein Gott," "Overflowing Passion," "Maji Kandou ☆ Hong Kong Night," and the Hetaloid song "Brother Complex").

Got back into reading fic. Somehow I went through my original stint in the fandom without reading "Gutters" and that's what pulled me back into fanfic. Made an A03. Eventually figured, why the hell not, and made a Hetalia Tumblr so I could stop using my personal account.

I did have that hiatus, but I guess I could say I've been into Hetalia for 10 years now, which is nuts. I definitely had a period of regret and revulsion from 2019-2022, but still kept up with "oh, they made a new season" or revisiting some old art.

4. What's a headcanon you need to work out?

A lot of my headcanons have to do with Human AU FACE fam because I use them to cope with things, but I guess something that's been on my mind lately is the Tudor dynasty. My senior thesis, far before I got back into Hetalia, was actually supposed to be about the Tudors, but I abandoned it for something else. I recently got a book about the entire dynasty for my birthday and have yet to take a peek at it. I would love to write a fic where France or Marianne visits England over several Christmases to explore the relationship of Arthur/Francis or Alice/Marianne as England & France's relationship changes through the changing of the monarchs and especially as Henry VIII cycles through wives like calendars. I have to do research about it, though. I need to see how realistic it would be considering the on-again-off-again relationship between England and France (1520 The Field Of The Cloth Of Gold meeting vs Henry wanting to prove his military strength and trying to invade France). Funnily enough, I know almost nothing about France in the 15th and 16th centuries outside of :

1. Mary Tudor's [Henry VIII's sister, not his daughter, Mary I] brief stint as Queen Consort of France & Anne Boleyn's subsequent time at the French court as a lady in waiting to Mary

2. how Henry VIII repeatedly used war against France as an attempt to prove his strength [eyeroll]

To be honest, that fic is entirely an excuse to explore the different influence each of Henry's queens has over the court through various means. I don't think anyone else would really be interested though, so it may be something I keep to myself.

Hetalia Ask Game

#floralcrematorium ask box

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pashminalamb · 1 year

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If you make an another account will you be posting it? You know so I can immediately follow and all 😁. And same I’ve always been a loner too. There have been a few exceptions though. But the past year taught me a lot about friendships so I’m just working on myself this year. It’s kind of lonely but at the same time really peaceful? I think I’m happier now than I’ve been in a long time. Yeah the lack of friends and companions makes things lonely but it’s not something that I’ll let break me anymore. I know I’m stronger than that now. Someone’s I think online people are easier to interact with because there’s no attachments?? Like if they left me I can assume something happened or they decided to go offline but I know for sure (mostly) it’s not my fault you know? And people online are just so much kinder in general. Not that I interact a bunch of people online, just a few, but that’s just my experience so far. Didn’t mean to go off on a rant there my bad 😅.

And don’t apologize for closing the chat box!! It’s completely understandable. As kind as people can be online there are still a bunch of creeps out here 🤢. So pls stay safe!!

YOUR SCREENSAVER?!??! ASDGKKGFFGG MY BABY HE LOOKS SO PRETTY. Also I’ve only recently gotten a Haitani brothers brainrot so like that’s a big factor atm 💀💀. OH there’s this one artist that posts her drawings in insta and tiktok abt TR and they look amazing and are so freaking funny I end up clutching my stomach every time 💀😭😂.

Here’s one of them

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRCVqAnf/

I’ve posted a few things on my blog but only drabbles really. I’ve been wanting to start doing analysis’s for a long time but I never got around to it. Just like character analysis’s and relationship analysis’s and story arcs and all that jazz. I love all of it. And in my opinion the best stories are the ones where the characters are what drive the plot of the story. TR did an amazing job of doing this and it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with the story in the first place almost immediately.

That one illuminati ask was…. something 💀.

Comfort fics are my favorite and the ones that explore real experiences and feelings and aren’t just a colt bf paste of the same words really do it for me.

Thank youuuu ☺️!!! Yeah my blogs a mess but I have so much fun with it. I haven’t posted anything in a while tho and I’m thinking about starting character analysis’s posts first. I’ll probably brainstorm over winter break. Which cant come soon enough btw. I have so many ideas for stories (besides fics I mean) and I wanna warm up and practice with tumblr.

Emperor! Izana ehhhh 👀👀?? Don’t worry I can wait. I can be patient when I want to be 😌. And the 30+ WIPS?? I felt that 😭😭. I don’t even wanna look at all the almost blank documents where I speed typed like 30 words at 3 am and when back to sleep 💀💀.

REOOOOOO!!! See like Nagi is also very adorable. And Barou has been growing on me lately 👀. See what I’m doing with blue lock now is just being spoiled left and right. I gave up trying to avoid spoilers (my lack of patience really shined through here) so now I see a post abt a match point or a duo breaking up in the manga and I’m like WAIT WHAT and then just don’t read the manga 💀💀. I WILL (eventually) soon but after the first season ends.

I love love love analyzing people and hearing their stories and learning things through experience. Which is really rich cause Im not good with talking to people and I never leave the house 💀💀. You can see my problem 😭😭.

How’s reading TR going? 👀👀

Ohhh I’ll check out those recs.

What did you think of the new episode of Chainsaw Man? Shit really hit the fan after the first 5 minutes 💀💀.

You should’ve told the guy where you found the picture so that he could save it as his wallpaper if he liked it so much 😌🙄.

Also can I mention how much I love the headers you put at the end of each ask? Like they’re so adorable and cute and thoughtful. I just wanted to say I really appreciate them!!! You’re so sweet ❤️❤️.

As for me, I’m currently in the library waiting for my next class to start. I took a tumblr break after eating lunch. My professor just made a big essay optional and extra credit because he wants us to review for our last unit test and midterm throughly. SO LIKE HECK YEAH!!! But also I already have an outline for it so I’m debating if the 10 point extra credit on our midterm is worth the extra work or not.

How’s your day going? Papers are rough but you got this 😤😤!!! Don’t forget to take breaks and eat something and drink water today okay??? *sends many virtual hugs*

- ✨ anon

Kinda want to announce it so that I don’t seem sus - but I also wanna be discreet abt it so that I can interact with people who wanna message me (in priv) and not people who want a part 2 of something from me ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა (please I get that you guys don’t wanna be left on a cliffhanger - but. I have a life outside tumblr and left with less hours to write. And if you want quality, you’re gonna have to wait. Pushing me isn’t gonna work cause you’re gonna be disappointed with the end result and so will I) you’ll be able to tell it’s me cause I will say this - it’s a TR username - I have two of them in mind and I can’t figure which one I want more cause the one I got represents me in whole and the other is a guy who’s high (ikyk)

Yeah, it gets lonely here- but at least it’s peaceful; I follow a few blogs - mostly art + JJBA updates (and I’m super excited to check out the new eps of stone ocean) interaction wise... i have tried it out before, but none of them lasted long. what hurt me the most was when i was trying to be genuine abt something and writers here (not all but some) are really closed off yk? like they're fine interacting with friends but are really selective with new people? cause of that i just gave up interacting with them altogether and after my ideas got taken and neither was anything being reciprocated back on my blog by them despite us following each other- cause it goes both ways and if its just me, i wont do it anymore. my experience online hasn't been that great except with the upload of fics... and the only interaction i would get was comments or going through tags that was included by the person who reblogged it- but with recent developments, a lot of that has changed and i'm comfortable talking to people now ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

Oh yea definitely. Safety is super important to me - that's why i never reveal too much about myself just small things cause you can't be completely safe on the internet- like when i was still a small time writer i got followed by a spanking account (istg the way my eyes widened when i saw it; and it wasn't even the kinky variety- it was traditional method of disciplining someone) - won't go much into detail about it but yeah i ended up blocking him. And now that i think abt it he must've read my hanma fic - but still (T.T)

Rindou is so pretty- i. he looked at me on the train (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ

Unfortunately, I don't use tiktok. I used to be there - but i realized that i wasted a lot of time with endless scrolling, some of the content had received a lot of likes despite there not being enough effort? not to mention my ex's friends came to troll me through that app. I deleted my account and as i got older, i decided to never go back - so now i just stick to pinterest, twitter and instagram with the latter two being purely for uni reasons. so yeah i'm not much of a social media kinda person - and yeah i live under a rock and i'm ancient (*��ິ꒳꒦ີ)

Oh yeah when characters take the drive and the plot goes ahead is a different thing altogether - and i agree. like even in tr, i was really surprised to see the turn of events and character development - especially Kazutora and yeah i saw the drabbles (didn't get to read them cause i haven't watched one piece but maybe i should soon) - glad to know that you're a woman of culture for liking ace cause i like him as well - despite not watching the anime (is a zoro fan as well) and now i wanna change the theme of my blog as well- thinking if i should go with beige, sage green or blue- gonna see how this pans out

that illuminati ask had me dead- and i was just laughing from confusion and saying that idk who was a part of project and conspiracies- it's gonna be an inside joke on the blog 😂

Oh yeah emperor Izana - very fitting for his image tbh; and literally- when its time to write, it is time to write and lately i've been feeling the word "cold" a lot which added to True north Aiku's part (yes i will talk abt my husband- and apparently he's set a standard for me in men too shaggy hair with a mullet minus the side shave + scruff/ 5 o clock shadow) I haven't watched the latest of bllk - i read the new chapter though - not much action but Isagi's development; and you found out abt a duo breaking up- ૮₍•᷄ ࡇ •᷅₎ა dw tho - there are more pairings that come in and you'll get to see Barou with his hair down- p hot ngl .What i really really pray for is aiku getting animated (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) i wanna see him touch him feel him (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

TR reading - might start uploading manga panels soon and i still like Senju/ Senjuu - she's like me (๑>ᴗ<๑) (although i know some ppl would disagree- i'm curious to see what character would you relate me to tho)

And i forgot to add that i read philosophy as well - i'm all over the place tbh - one of my favs is tuesdays with morrie. Its a sad book but totally worth the read.

I haven't watched chainsaw man just read the manga- but i think i should start watching that cause mappa did a good job with it and honestly- the animation looks very different than their usual (i was roped into re-watching aot - likes reiner and porco )

Ty fur liking the headers- (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) i'm gonna put them for every ask - might start putting webtoon ones too

Oof good luck on the review!

So, i wrote the review and the prof liked it a lot- i got summoned to the archival section of the library - the books there are so old and dusty and i'm working on a research paper with my prof (had to wash my hand three times to get the dust off and i'm thinking of carrying surgical gloves for this-)

I hope your say is going well too, starry!

I do not regret sending cursed images I found on Pinterest

#Belle.☏#.lost sheep : ✨ anon

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sandwichfordinner · 1 year

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YIPPEE MATCHUPS! I hope you're having a good day! Just to let you know- it might help to have your masterlist pinned to the top otherwise people might not be able to see it! (Unless it is an I just can't see if for some reason... ✌️live laugh love) ANYWAY. YES. IDV. I have no hunter/survivor preference!!!

I am nonbinary and pan, no preference. Im tall- like 5'10 or something, brown eyes, dirty blonde usually long and fluffy with short bangs but I'm thinking about getting it layered short. my style varies, often I either dress quite formal and smart (smart trousers! Blouses and collard shirts! Sweaters!!!) But if im not going out i'll switch to a lot of oversized loose fitting clothes in LAYERS!!! SO MANY LAYERS!!! (im so glad flares are popular again!!!) I quite like clothes, I just refuse to wear dresses or shorts as I am quite insecure and uncomfortable in them.

I am a huge bookworm, passionate about a lot of humanities subjects, philosophy, art, history, sociology and psychology, law e.c.

People often times say I have good knowledge about a variety of subjects or have an opinion on everything.

But to be honest its either 0 or 100 with me. I'm autistic and typically go non verbal around people I am not comfortable with (i NEVER approach new people myself) and small talk is the devil i cannot do it. If I try to force myself at best I start stuttering badly 💀. I'm not too bothered by it, it's just frustrating. The only exception i'm fine 'approaching' is to talk to them is online/through writing as it puts concerns about reading social queues out the window.

However the 100 side of it, people that approach me and engage in topics i actually like... as well as people close to me, I'm the opposite, I have to have meaningful discussions and love to share ideas with people! It's like I do a complete 180! People oftentimes mistake me as being very confident if they catch me like this and dont know me very well but I think it's just because I'm moreso passionate and fixate a lot.

At my worst I become extremely avoidant and shut in, typically to be able to get out of my room I need someone I'm friends or close with that can drive me out or stay with me, otherwise I panic. (That includes ignoring basic needs, i will ignore them if i feel threatened) but so long as I have people close to me around I feel far more confident in being able to mask (for me its not always a bad thing if it helps me to be productive/actually stay alive). I cannot stand to be touched by others unless I'm expecting it but even then I'm still sensitive, but I am okay with touching others! Exihibit A! I love pampering friends and get compliments on my massages!!!! Do not do the same to me the devil takes over my body and I cannot control spasms i am not laughing of joy I am on the verge of a breakdown!!!!

As for specific hobbies: I like drawing/painting and sculpting! I LOVE board and tabletop games, chess, card games like blackjack. I like anything to do with watersports. I love to swim! Reading and writing is obviously a big one too and my most recent interest is learning to bake! (Because im dogshit at cooking)

I hope thats enough and that I did everythjng!!! Hope you have a lovely day!!!!

Note: I am not really sure what no binary pronouns use, I asked google and said that go by they, if it doesn’t go by they I am terribly sorry and please tell me if I did it wrong! Also have a nice day you too anon! 💝

And also I am so sorry If I skipped something 😞

I match you wiiith🥁🥁🥁…

Galatea and Emil!

Galatea:

The moment she heard that you like sculpting, she immediately wanted to know more about you!

Even chess?? THATS AMAZING !! She loves playing chess too!!

She was so scared to talk to you thought, she didn’t know how to start a conversation.

Wow she finally spoke to you! But it was in a match while you were chaired and Galatea was just staring at you a little creepy.. That made you uncomfortable and you looked away ‘when will I get sent back to the manor.’ You thought.

,,Your eyes are… pretty..’’ she quietly and softly said.

That caught you off guard and you looked back at her.

,,O-oh thank you! Uh your e- I mean your sculpture is nice!’’ ‘Oh nahh💀💀 why did I say this😭’

She looked confused at the Little rock of clay but smiled.

,,Thank you.. Can I.. talk to you more?’’

You nodded and smiled again.

,,M-maybe play some c-chess with me..?’’ She quietly spoke.

,,I’m sorry what did you say?’’

,,Nothing!’’ Her face was now hidden and you could only see the back of the wheelchair.

She was blushing, which left you confused.

,,Uh can we meet-‘’ But suddenly the rocket chair started spinning which you flew back to the manor, but before you flew she said more loudly: ,,Meet me a-after the match!!’’ ,,OK!’’

When both of you started dating she made you little sculptures of hearts or cute things you like.

BOTH OF YOU MAKING SCULPTURES <333

Walks! When the both of you aren’t in a match you would push the wheelchair while Galatea is on it around the manor. Usually Galatea starts the conversations because she knew that you really couldn’t start one. Such a nice and supportive gf 🫶

Give her a surprise kiss on her cheek and she’s blushing.

Emil

Oh this sweet little guy.

Another awkward shy introvert😭

To the moment he saw you , he felt funny in his stomach. And he could feel his cheeks red.

Would try to start a conversation with you.

But if you tried you would be a stuttering mess, really nervous too because of how much you stuttered.

He doesn’t find it funny tho, in fact he finds it cute. He would chuckle a little, but when he saw your face like it was about to cry he immediately stopped and looked at you in worry.

,,I-I am s-so sorry for laughing! I didn’t m-meant to , i-it’s not that I promise!’’ Okay he accidentally held your hands without noticing. Man was panicking 😭

Now both of you looked like a couple.

You started feeling more nervous at the sudden contact, which he realised too, quickly stopped holding your hands and running away none stop saying ‘I’m so sorry!’ Man it was sure something😭😭

Next day he came to apologise and said that he will never do it again.

This man is so sweet bro.. and respectful too..

He found himself getting more and more comfortable by the time.

But not too comfortable because he would blush sometimes, trying to hide his face while you were looking at him confused.

When both of you were finally dating he would get more protective, not obsessive! He is just worried about you getting hurt!

When people misgender you, he would confidently say: ,,If you didn’t know Y/N is not comfortable calling them he or she!’’

Ur biggest support!

Always asks you if you’re okay with it before he hugs you or kisses you!

When you’re feeling down and don’t want to talk to anyone he would slide down a letter under your door and leave.

There is written how much he loves you, that the others are just jerks and a bunch of more praises and nice things written. And he finished with a ‘please talk to me later, I am worried’.

If you kiss him or hug him he would have the biggest smile on his face with red face.

Best bf material😻

#identity v x reader #idv x reader #idv hcs #sandwichfordinner #identity v x you #identity v headcanons #identity v oneshots #identity v emil #identity v emile #emil mesmer #identity v emile x reader #emil x reader idv #identity v galatea #galatea claude #galatea claude x reader #match ups #match up game

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muji-milk · 1 year

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diff anon, but i’m wondering if the immediate referral to (potential) medical service has anything to do with the fact that access to that service is related to why many young trans people attempt suicide. the medical community knows the statistics and knows that it’s life saving care for many young trans people, so even just referring them there could be life saving. that doesn’t necessarily negate your point about needing more counselors involved in the process, though. perhaps there should be psychological counseling during the waiting process. i’d imagine that might lead them to be vulnerable to the not-always-impartial whim of a psychologist though. (also i’ve been following you since your gender confusion era and even *I* nearly unfollowed you at first because putting ‘affirmation’ in quotes is big terf energy. figured i’d give you a chance to explain.)

I put affirmation in quote marks just to emphasize the word, not to show a disbelief or dismissal of the service. I agree that it can and has saved lives.

However, I also think that viewing my words as terf energy is....ridiculous. TERF rhetoric is a very specific thing, but this acronym is used so frequently to quiet someone who raises a concern about gender issues that doesn't immediately align with 100% support for affirmation, that it has become diluted. We should reserve terf for what it is - some chronically online feminists who do not believe trans people are sane/real and would rather ignore/eradicate them. A terf is not anyone who wants to discuss shortcomings in the current medical approach to dysphoria. The more we bandy around a word like terf when someone attempts to discuss an alternative view, the more people are going to give up and go "yeah well then i am a terf". And we get nowhere.

Anyway!

I do agree the waiting process is flawed. Even when someone is a fully prepared and intentional, they still just have to wait for sometimes 1-2 years; and in the meantime there's nothing really provided. I think that this waiting period can be what drives some people to a more dysphoric state, because their desired outcome is almost in their grasp and they may get tunnel vision towards it.

I also think that the constant reference to affirmation service as 'lifesaving' puts so much pressure on everyone; the clinics, the young patients, the parents of young patients. It makes it look like the only option if you want to be happy and not die. And if you don't send your child there, they will die. You know what was life saving for me? Not transitioning. Spending lots of time thinking and realising things about myself. Going to counseling to talk through other things unrelated to gender. Getting out of my solitary bubble.

But, big but; because I never formally began the medical transition process (only socially) I am not a measurable statistic. I never became a patient to a clinic, so my experience is not traceable. Those who medically transition are a quantifiable group. Those who commit suicide are also a quantifiable group. We can use these 2 data sets to show the correlation; affirmation = lifesaving. But there's is no data on the amount of people like me who went through phases and changed their minds and are happier because they came out of that phase rather than following through. It shouldn't be controversial and 'terfy' to tell young people "sometimes it is just a phase" - phases are valid and help us discover things about ourselves, and the end result after the phases can be something we didn't expect.

So to constantly present 'affirmation' as the only lifesaver creates very loaded ideas in the individual's mind; you feel this is the route to your true self, you see older people saying they wish they'd done it sooner, you read encouraging statistics about people's life after transition, and you read depressing statistics about those who kill themselves because their family wont let them access transition when they're a teen; and then you have to sit around waiting for 2 years, getting more desperate to reach that 'lifesaver' with all this info in your head potentially blinding you to other possibilities of growth and expression and the lives you could lead if it does turn out to be a phase.

#tldr #making dysphoric youth feel like their 2 options are transition or death #is not the bees knees frankly #and perhaps that rigid division of 2 paths contributes heavily to dysphoria and subsequently suicide #sorry that was so long! i do genuinely want to have these discussions and no one should feel like they can't #say or ask me something in response to my points #please feel free

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boxenwitchsystem · 11 days

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Maybe asking for advice on how to help another alter? Or some words that they're not alone. Anything, really.

CW: Hypersexuality due to CSA. Paranoia of one's perception by others. ""Self-slut-shaming""

Context and explanation under read more

Extra context: we are bodily an adult. This alter is an adult. I'm using neutral pronouns and "this alter" to protect this alter's specific identity. I am this alter's in-system partner and I'm also an adult who is just really worried and wants to help their partner.

You're never welcome: MAPS/NO-MAPS, pedophiles, anyone who thinks attraction to a child is ever okay or even something to consider.

We have a main alter who struggles with being a caregiver while being hypersexual. They are very parental and responsible in and out of system, and will do anything to protect children and to keep children happy and with their needs met. Think of a mother hen instinctively adopting any chicks she finds and defending them like her own.

We're a repeated-CSA survivor and online-grooming survivor (separate situations and traumas) with severe paralysing C-PTSD. This alter is the main holder of said traumas and is very adamant on doing everything in their power to prevent this from happening to anyone else again.

However

Due to the nature of our trauma and how our system formed and is structured, this alter is also hypersexual. They get intrusive thoughts of sexual urges* and have a very high sex drive that spikes up randomly, which means not being able to control when or where they get aroused (in front) and becoming very uncomfortable because at the moment they can't be in private to be sexual or even just intimate.

*For clarification: these intrusive thoughts are essentially along the lines of "I really want to have sex", "I want to [any sexual act they want at the moment] really bad", "I'm very horny just because, and would like to go home and have sex". They are never about anyone in particular but them and me (their partner in system), or about themself alone, and have no connection to the place they're in, the time of day, the people they're interacting with, etc.

And this is terrifying to them.

Not because they, nor anyone in system, thinks it's bad to have a higher sex drive, but because they get paranoid that people outside of the system will wrongly connect the dots and assume and/or accuse them that they're having these thoughts about the children they're taking care of (or about children in general) and that's why they are so happy around children.

We never talk about anything sexual in front of children, nor put children in any situation that could be "adult". But paranoia can be irrational and it makes them unbearably worried that someone will think that they are predatory and a danger to children just because they are someone who finds joy and fulfilment in being a caregiver, while also SEPARATELY being hypersexual.

I genuinely cannot overstate how they are really the last person to even think of putting a child in harms way or in a sexual context.

They still are very genuinely caring to kids but (especially online) they're very afraid of speaking up, seeking any validation or understanding about hypersexuality to cope with the fact that it's literally thanks to being repeatedly sexually abused at a young age and it's not them being "a sex freak" (like someone once called us after mentioning we're a CSA survivor. The disgust and shame really engraved itself on their memory).

Because we have younger friends who this alter loves like family and is very caring of these friends (to the point of even being strict about foul language and even seeming a bit prudish in general) they're afraid that people will see the word "hypersexual" and immediately think that we're friends with these younger friends because they want to take advantage of them. This alter is very afraid of said friends becoming afraid of them for something in this alter's private life that this alter is really strict about separating from their social life (as in, they would never, ever, do anything to harm these friends, nor are any of the urges/thoughts about them or anyone who isn't me (their partner)).

And no, they are not going to talk about this to anyone who is a minor. Ever. But they're irrationally paranoid that they'll be associated with predatory people or that our younger friends will see them trying to seek validation on their hypersexuality in a separate space.

#traumagenic system #traumagenic osdd #osdd system #system stuff #tw csa #hypersexuality #hypersexuality as a trauma response #system advice #own post

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benkyoutobentou · 2 months

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31 Days of Productivity Reading: Day twenty two

Before: I think I might want to spend some time studying at the library today. I have another hold coming in soon (this timing is fantastic...) but whether or not it'll be in today is anyone's guess. I was debating walking there again, but I might want to take an evening hike, so I'll just drive. Plus, it cuts out like an hour from my trip.

I also plan on starting 憎らしい彼 today! Recently, a bunch of people I follow on instagram were reading 愛しのニコール which is by the same author, and although I don't have that book and am not planning on buying more books any time soon, I figured that I can at least feel like I'm somewhat included by finally continuing on with the 美しい彼 series. All things considered, though, it really hasn't been that long since I read the first book. I mean, it took me a year after reading volume four of ３月のライオン to get to volume five. That's just how I am. And also why I tend to avoid series in my English reading.

One more thing while I'm thinking of it! It relates to almost nothing but I've been thinking about it a lot lately. I saw someone mention recently how there's been a shift in the typesetting of manga, since more and more people are reading manga on their phones and other (smaller) devices. I definitely noticed this when reading ベルばら and especially since I read it right after reading 光が死んだ夏 but the text is sooo much smaller in older manga! ひかなつ is for sure published online and the text is huge compared to ベルばら. When I was reading it, I pulled it out during the musical to read and immediately put it back in my bag because I just could not read the little font in the dim lighting. Reading something like that on a phone? No thanks. I don't know, this was useless but I've been thinking about how smartphones and the internet have changed even the manga publishing world.

After: I didn't end up going to the library today for a number of reasons. I was a little on the fence to start with, and then when I finally decided to go, I had to walk my dog before going because she's such a talented beggar and I'm weak. We ended up taking an hour long walk and when we got back, I just felt that it was too late to go out and study. Instead of going to the library, I started 憎らしい彼 today! I read the prologue chapter and also discovered that, excluding the prologue and epilogue, there are two chapters in this book. Not to be dramatic, but that should be illegal. Regardless, it feels nice to get back into this series. I really like Nagira Sensei's writing style and I can't help it, I love my toxic gays.

I also realized that I probably won't be able to finish this book by the end of the month, so I think I'll adjust my goal to reading half of it. I still think I can read six more volumes of manga, though.

Anyways, I read seventeen pages today over an hour and fourteen minutes for an average reading pace of 3.8 minutes per page. I really would like to read some more before bed, but between my bed and the clock, it's not looking super likely.

#benkyou posting #studyblr #langblr #language learning #polyglot #booklr #30 days of productivity #this weekend is not looking good for my reading hours #i have to go to a bunch of different store and plus i already made plans to watch 30000 li from chang'an with my mom tomorrow night #which is nearly three hours long #but we love light chaser studios films so high expectations

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purplesurveys · 5 months

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1786

How frequently are you inclined to read, and how much? Pretty often but it's just never novels, or anything fiction really. I try to get an article or essay in at least once a week since it's only through reading that I get to pick up new styles or vocab for my own writing.

When was the last time you questioned the direction your life was taking? I'm kind of going through that since I have been feeling caught in the middle in my job for a while now. My promotions have all happened at such a rapid pace and a part of me wants to appreciate all these opportunities and of course all the raises lol; but on the other hand I am also extremely well-aware of my objective incapabilities of being a leader, and now that I've technically made my way to the top I can't help but think 1) someone else would be a much better fit in this role I'm in, and 2) if there are other jobs out there where I can go back to being a follower.

I guess this is 25?

What small things have the ability to get under your skin? When people are slow, and it applies to just about everything. Drivers who take too long to change lanes, people who choose what to order while it's their turn instead of staying at the side to pick, when I'm part of a bigger group and they want to take a group photo and for some reason the blocking/formation takes forever to arrange... all these things really drain my battery for patience I'm afraid, lol.

When was the last time you were caused to be upset with someone? I was just the teeniest tiniest wee bit upset with my cousin last night for using my car outside of the main reason I lent my car to him in the first place. Long story short, he drove it for errands when my car suddenly went through a hiccup and wouldn't start and he called us in a panic because now he was stuck in front of a drugstore on Christmas eve with a car that won't start. It made my family have to adjust and slightly delay our dinner plans since we had to drive to him and jumpstart the car. It was honestly a hassle lol, especially on Christmas eve, but at the end of the day I still mostly felt bad for him since it must've been scary being stuck at the highway with a hiccup-y car that wasn't even his.

What is something small that has the ability to cure a bad mood? When I check on my dogs for comfort during said bad mood and they immediately hand over their toys to play fetch.

What beverage is best capable of quenching your thirst? Cold water.

What was the last big change through which you went? Do you deal well with change, typically? Have you always? The last big change(s): A massive work promotion, my two superiors simultaneously resigning, and the onboarding of a new business director under my unit (aka my new superior) who happens to have no prior knowledge or experience of PR.

The adjustments have been heavy and real and I'm going through the difficult process of accepting the fact that at this point I'll have to hand-hold both my teammates and the new superior. It's like playing a human tug of war and I'm the rope, haha.

No, I typically don't deal well with change. I like having structure and while I have learned to professionally adjust to PR being a change-heavy line of work, I still ultimately find comfort in routine. That's why Bea and Trina resigning has pretty much shaken my world and I'm still struggling to keep my head above water.

How do you feel after spending a great quantity of time online? I feel a bit inadequate, almost pathetic lol. When I reach that point I automatically put my phone down, leave it in my room, then find something else to do for a few hours.

What do you consider to be the biggest drawback to being you? Just the fact that I feel like the sun is setting with my time in my current company, but at the same time I also still don't really know where to head next. Feeling directionless in that regard has been more frustrating than I ever thought it would be.

What do you consider the best part of being who you are? I'm resilient, and, apparently, capable.

What kinds of things do you have on display in your room? I had my room completely remodeled a year ago so that it allows me to display all my BTS merch. Right now though we're right smack in the middle of the holidays, so I currently have a ton of paper bags with gifts that I'm not quite sure how to display around my room yet.

What do you think your room and its contents say about you, if anything? It says I am a K-pop fan who is willing to spend money on anything and everything related to her favorite group.

When was the last time you felt insecure about something/some situation? Currently.

Do you ever stop to contemplate infinity? Sure. Mostly about the universe – how big it can possibly be, how many other planets are out there, how many other livable planets are out there, who else in this giant ass map is living in this timeline, etc.

Are you comfortable amongst nature, or does the wilderness discomfort you? It depends, but I'm in the belief that if there's even just one thing that bugs me about nature then I don't really get to say that I'm comfortable in it – if that makes sense? Hahaha. That said there are a couple of things that I don't really like, like the mosquitoes, the no electricity and spotty cell signal... being in nature is great as a staycation, but I don't think I can live in it altogether.

When was the last time someone or something caught you off guard? Last night. The priest's Christmas homily was SO short I was dying trying not to laugh when I realized he was done within like 4 minutes and the commentator was already signaling for us to stand up so we can proceed to the next part of the service. I felt like the grand winner of the night HAHAHAHA

How much time do you put into maintaining your appearance and hygiene? Continued from last night. It's definitely less than average in that I'm not interested in makeup, use skincare stuff, or book appointments for my nails or whatever. But I also certainly don't neglect myself – it's just that I prefer really only going with the bare essentials; like when I go out I make sure my hair is tied properly or that my outfit's colors match and such.

Are there any foods you eat daily? Or wish you could? Rice.

When was the last time someone new entered your life? What was your first impression of that individual? My cousin's boyfriend. He's very friendly and we were able to bond pretty quickly because apparently he works in the ASC. Makes a mean gin and juice tower too.

Do you put much thought into your handwriting? I guess so. If I'm writing something and am not happy with how my penmanship turned out, I usually wouldn't hesitate to give it a second attempt (or third, or fourth...) until I'm finally satisfied.

What are some of the top priorities in your life right now? Getting settled in my new role, especially now that Bea has legit legit resigned and will be stepping out effective January 1st. And figuring out where to go next career-wise because I don't plan on staying long in said new role.

In general, how do you feel about romantic relationships? I wish it could be more normalized that it's not always for everyone. People my age get so bugged when they get asked when they plan on getting married or having kids, but they should also realize that they also get as intrusive when they ask me why I'm not dating or why I don't like dating or being in a relationship.

Which emotional sensation inconveniences or bothers you the most? Probably the anxiety/restlessness I get when I send an urgent message and the other person takes forever to respond. When that happens I put my phone away first and try to distract myself by doing something else – and while it mildly helps, it also doesn't completely take out the anxiety until they reply.

Are you capable of consoling others in their grief? No, and I'm not the type of person to actively console someone in grief because you never really know what they need at the moment; and from my own experiences, people usually want to be left alone. For the most part I leave a message for them and kinda just be on standby in case they want to talk.

Do you ever find it awkward to compliment another being? No, I quite like giving compliments. It's me who isn't so big on receiving them because I never know how to react, lol.

When was the last time you had a new experience? What was it? Last week at our Christmas party when I was a runner-up for best costume and had to do a runway pose thing because it was how they were going to determine the winner. I'm a selective extrovert, and performing in front of an audience beyond public speaking is NOT a comfortable situation for me haha. That said I bombed it on purpose so they can pick a winner and I can get out of the stage ASAP.

Do you dress more for yourself, or to the expectations of others? I wear what I like but I also make sure it's presentable for everyone else.

What kinds of things tend to stress you out? They're all work-related things. Outside of that, I guess unexpected emergencies? I don't exactly deal with them well; like if my car suddenly won't start I will 100% panic and call for someone to ask if they can come for me.

What is one way you cope when you feel like crap? YouTube YouTube YouTube all the way.

Name an insult you regularly receive, if there is one? Fortunately I am not insulted on the regular, at least not anymore.

Name a site that takes up a lot of your time Reddit.

What is something you used to believe about life that you no longer do? That I can keep throwing myself into work until the day I retire and easily ignore the stress because as long as I'm earning money I will be happy. That was me in college and it's the most naive I've been.

What is a lesson you have recently learned? Book Christmas Eve delivery reservations in advance.

Do you have a tendency to look on the morbid side of life? Eh, sometimes.

When was the last time you went shopping? What did you buy? I went on a final gift shopping run the day before Christmas Eve for my aunt who went home as a surprise + Angela's parents. For my aunt I got her a handful of silver earrings, then for Anj's parents I bought a bunch of nuts because apparently they're obsessed with them these days hahaha.

When you shop for clothing, how long does it take you? Give me an hour at most, especially if I had nothing specifically planned to get.

What is something fun you have done within the past week? Bonded with my cousins from my dad's side for the first time.

What is something you hope you never have to do again? Be a finalist for costume contests and have to pose and do bits for the audience.

How does the rain affect your mood, if it does? It relaxes me.

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yasbeychsbitchblog · 1 year

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11.23.22

I want to make new friends online but I feel like I am being so weirdly excited every time I talk to a new person. I feel like I’m just realizing I can actually talk with people about things I really like, and the realization is so heartwarming that I’m coming into these social spaces a little too Intimate.

I sometimes feel so alone that my fixation interests aren’t shared by real life friends. I literally put tf on my hinge profile because I wanted to finally meet somebody with a common interest that wasn’t something generic like hiking but rather a Bigtime / fixation Interest!! But that’s so far only pulled guys who don’t seem to understand that for me the common interest is a quasi-spiritual platonic-and-then-maybe-more bonding opportunity and not one of many potential commonalities that might underlie wanting to fuck.

The first dude wanted to talk about tf comics but then when I wouldn’t descend into flirting and rather Actually Wanted to talk about the comics, he stopped responding. The second seemed great but the situation was also derailed by my asymmetric interest in content vs sex.

I don’t know. I just don’t know how to do this. On my last date I’d been so excited because we were going to watch a tf movie but then as we were watching and commentating it was clear he had no knowledge of the characters, and he kept getting clingy and handsy right off the bat even though on our first/previous date I’d TOLD him I’d been thinking about the asexual label and that it might feel correct / that going on further dates with me would likely not mean sex. And at the end he tried to get me to go in his room and I wouldn’t, and then he offered to drive me home and tried to kiss me in the car but I said no thanks and then I bodily panicked the entire drive back while being extremely honest about my limits but.,,, I’m still upset because I hate that the conversation was all about what I relatively could promise corporally and I ultimately couldn’t promise Anything Obviously because I’ve only known this person from ONE TO TWO INSTANCES OF HANGING OUT!!

I’m just,

I feel like I’m just a person. And other people are just people. And I want to connect with people based on the things we enjoy, as people. I hate when I’m coming to someone as a person but all they see is Girl or Girl-presenting and then proceed to treat me with a script that to me reads as Ridiculous. “Aw, you’re such a dork” , sniffing my hair , clinging to my side , seeming like he’s slyly trying to get me to accidentally touch his dick , WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? YOU DONT KNOW ME?? Why do you think you have the right??

This rant / journal is getting away from me, but basically, that date kinda sucked because I thought it would be fun but instead I felt pretty not seen and like a stand-in doll for a gender I feel Way Neutral about / not associated with. Was it that he knew I was more dominant from my profile, and assumed mentioning sex was a signal for active interest In Immediately Fucking even though I told him it was there so that nobody down the line would be surprised that I’d prefer to strap / don’t enjoy a submissive role if sex is ever had??

I don’t like that some people, if they see you as Girl, won’t actually engage with you in content talk, because as Girl your primary business there is Sex.

I just wish a non-man would hit up that part of my profile because I feel like queer people instinctively get certain things more, or are more well-versed in having Things You Like and Want To Talk About.

I don’t know.

I feel so strange not being able to tell what’s a Me thing and what’s Commonly expected. Like, would your average Joe also be uncomfortable at strong physical proximity on the second date? Or is what was tried a really common scenario and I’m the one who is acting unexpectedly by not being interested despite my finding that new person interesting enough to hang out with??

I’m really sad today. Trying to cheer myself up with some silly things.

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media-offline · 2 years

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4 Dates and 6 Work Days

Four bad dates and a work week passed. Not terrible bad, yet not a single one worth cooing over either.

Consider is a wash.

DATE 1: Sunday coffee with Mr El Salvador

It's my first day with permission to be in the world since catching covid, and naturally, the first thing I have scheduled is a coffee date/meet-up. It's convenient because I have to pick up dog poop bags on the way home for Bean.

Pouring rain with limited parking at a weird non-place in Cully. I pull up in my car and immediately sigh, seeing the hooded young man, clearly waiting for his tinder date, with god knows what idea of what he thinks I will be. I come from a cross road that was unpaved and riddled with puddles. A 5'8" latino man stands across the street, wearing a thin pull-over blue grey sweater, the fabric clinging uncomfortably to him like a gap sweater you pull out of the closet and wear years past its prime.

Big teeth, a nice voice, glasses, and the way-too-thin-hood pulled up over his head. He barrel-chested hugged me, in a way that felt too tight for a first meeting, or perhaps the covid isolation had me unrehearsed. The coffee was too sweet and he was uninteresting. I left after an hour, and he ordered an Uber back to his apartment he shares with someone in Vancouver. Not quite a turn on.

DATE 2: Taco Tuesday with Korean Gym Rat

The first pick for date night, who had texted for a week, decided that now he's not interested in me before meeting me. So he was deleted, and contender number 2 stepped up. A 6 foot Korean man who was built from the gym and came with kit military sleeve tattoos. Heavily accented, I had not expected him to be born and raise in Korea, as I had assumed he was Korean American. Despite his accent, he was never lost in the conversation, and his humor was endearingly goofy.

He seemed uninteresting outside of working long days at work for a train company and spending likely too much time working out. He lost me as soon as he asked "why are you single?" I hate that question. It implies a variety of unfavorable ideas. That perhaps I'm hiding something nefarious with my looks, or that a woman like myself should be partnered, and by not being so, I have caused disruption. I'm single because no one is good enough yet.

More than 3 times throughout the night he offered me his hand (which was small) and left me confused as to if I was supposed to kiss it, hold it, fist bump it, or shake it....? He insists we go get tacos from a food truck down the way. We take his car which smells clean and he drives politely. He then orders ONLY 1 taco, leaving me to order a full meal to eat while he snacks. He hugs me to keep me warm, but I have no desire to hug back, only to be hugged. I'm selfish, but I also paid for the food.

DATE 3: Jewish Callback at the Dive Bar

A call back from a previous match from August. He wanted to meet for tropical drinks at the bar next to where my ex's brother is a chef. I pull around the corner and see a gawky young man with thick rimmed glasses and an oversized army green jacket. I cringe, hoping it would not be my date, yet I knew it was him already.

I take my time now park as I avoid what I know I am already uninterested in. Am I bad at reading profiles? I feel so surprised by these packages I have been ordering online, they always look different in the pictures.

Compared to him I'm over dressed. We clomp to a dive bar he says is close by but feels far away. I immediately pour down two vodka cranberries in a classic dim, punk, half-empty Portland bar. The conversation is easy, but uninteresting. By the third drink the conversation was more tolerable.

He stops to introduce me to his friends on our way out who appeared unexpectedly. I said hello, knowing I would never meet or see them again. He walks me back to my car, and I know I won't talk to him again, but rather than tell him in the dark rainy street, I peck a kiss goodbye and run off. Always best to avoid rejecting a stranger when there are no witnesses.

He messages later offering his number, an offer I don't take up. DATE 4: Latin Firefighter for Wine & Cheese

I was excited for this one because he was cute from the Facetime call we had the previous week. I had covid and he was out of town, so I figured a call might indicate if he was a decent pair. I had drunk texted him a bit as well, naturally.

I arrive to Stem wine bar on a stormy night, the wind blowing the rain sideways into my thoughtful, yet not warm, and cute outfit. He's 5'10" as promised, but with terrible fashion and form. He felt a little un-groomed. His all-black outfit was cheap, thoughtless, and covered in lint. His hair was messy and too long, slightly tucked under a baseball cap to hide it.

He's a proclaimed dom daddy, yet all of his movements felt like bottom energy. Good conversation again, but a night I was happy to end. His only attempts to touch were a weird moment where he fondled my right bicep while I showed him my work on Instagram. He walks me back to my car and I confidently peck him goodbye. I think I might call upon him again.

On second thought, I don't think I will. He follows up with a text next day saying he's thinking of my "soft little kiss". That somehow felt creepy.

#dating #dating profile #tinder #hinge #tinderfails

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ledenews · 2 years

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‘Hoagy’s Heroes’ Need Tasters for Saturday BBQ Fundraiser

He didn’t want to do it. “I didn’t.” Most of all, he didn’t want to ever do it again. “Never,” said Hoagy Carmichael. “Why would I?" “We did that very first poker run back in 2003, and everyone the next morning said they had so much fun that they wanted to know where the run would travel to the next year. My answer was immediate, ‘Nowhere,’ and they wanted to know why,” he recalled. “That’s when I told them that I spent about 60 hours organizing everything, and I didn’t want to do it again.” Insert Guilt Trip Here. “They all said, “C’mon, man; let’s do it for the kids,’ and you know what happened. One thing led to another, and here I am today still doing these events to raise money for the children in the area that need our help,” Carmichael said. “But it’s true. I did not want to be involved with it in the very beginning, but I’m a soft-hearted kind of guy, and I care about the kids.” Hoagy colored his hair for a fundraiser event he attended with his wife. 10-4 Good Buddy! He was known most by the handle “Space Trucker” when he was driving a truck, and barely anyone knows his real name. Hint: A few folks used to refer to him as “Bobby” before he became known to most as “Hoagy.” “But when I was a kid, if you heard Mrs. Carmichael shout out, ‘ROBERT LEE!,’ someone was in trouble,” Carmichael said with a laugh. “But for some reason, I’ve always had a nickname, and that played into it when people started telling me I needed to go online because that’s where all the action was. “That’s when people started saying things about a website, and that’s because we had so much success without anything being on the Internet. A lot of people thought it would help increase the amounts in the future,” Carmichael explained. “After I agreed to the website and to the Facebook page, I asked everyone what they wanted to call it, and that’s when they suggested ‘Hoagie’s Heroes.’” So, that’s when the legend was born. Carmichael has a lot of fun these days with planning and hosting events that benefit local children. “The website was developed and they put it up on the Internet, and I guess at that point, we were something really real,” he said. “And we’ve been doing what we do ever since, and we’ve helped a lot of families through very tough times. “And listen; not every child we’ve tried to help has made it. We’ve lost a few, and those occasions have been some of the saddest times in my life. It’s heart-wrenching.” He and his Heroes are utilizing his online presence to promote this Saturday’s BBQ Contest at St. Jude Hall in Glen Dale. The event is from 11 a.m. until 4 p.m. and will benefit the Ronald McDonald House Charities in Morgantown. There will be trophies for the best beef, poultry, and pork, and those who want to taste the entries can donate $30 per person or $50 per couple. Feel free to call Hoagy at 304-639-1863. A number of raffles also will take place during the fundraiser, including a 50-50 drawing and gift basket giveaways. “So, yes, it is true. At the beginning of all of this, I didn’t want to do it because I thought it was too much work like a lot of people think, but then I saw the differences we can make. I saw the smiles on the kids’ faces, the relief we offer the parents, and the fun that we all have knowing that we’re really helping others,” Carmichael confessed. “The smiles make it all worth it. “So, here we go again this Saturday, and there’s so much more coming down the pike,” he added. “We really never stop, and we like it that way.” Read the full article

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the-bau-quinjet · 3 years

Text

Secret's Out

Summary: Request! Reid and Y/N are secretly dating, but their business doesn't stay their business for long.

Warnings: Criminal Minds level violence

Word Count: 2974

a/n: Thank you for the request! I hope you like it :)

Sorry this took forever! It took me a while to think of case details that I liked and then I kept rewriting parts. I think I'm finally happy with it though!

Masterlist

"Spencer!" You pushed him away. "The doors could open at any moment! How are we supposed to keep this a secret if Morgan walks in on us kissing in the elevator?" You raised a brow at him.

"On average, elevators travel at a speed of 200 ft/min or about 4 seconds per floor. Being on the fifth floor means we have about 20 seconds to ourselves." He smiled triumphantly.

"Yeah, until someone surprises us on floor 3." You rolled your eyes, stepping out of the doors once they opened.

"I can't help it. I'm just... really happy with you." He whispered softly.

"I'm really happy too." You smiled at him. You were about to lean in when the elevator doors opened once again to reveal JJ and Emily.

"Hey guys, ready for another case?" Emily glanced between you suspiciously, but thankfully didn't ask any prying questions.

"Yep, let's go!" You turned quickly, walking into the round table room without so much as a glance back at the three agents by the elevator.

"What's with her?" JJ questioned.

"Said she didn't sleep well last night. Must be all the caffeine." He held his own cup off coffee up in solidarity before also walking to the round table room.

"Alright, we've got 3 dead in Billings, Montana. All three were law enforcement, and all three were found this morning around the city." You listened as Penelope introduced the details of the case.

"Could be someone who feels the police didn't do a good enough job protecting a loved one?" You threw out a theory.

"Or someone who feels wronged by the criminal justice system as a whole." Rossi added on.

"Either way, they likely won't stop until we catch them. Wheels up in 20." Hotch rose from his seat as he spoke, wasting no time in preparing for take off.

You all dispersed briefly to grab your go bags, meeting back at the SUVs to head to the jet.

Once boarded, it didn't take long for the conversation to start up again.

"When we land, L/N go to the morgue. Dave, Prentiss take the first and second crime scenes, they're only a mile apart. Morgan and Reid, check out the third scene. I'll head to the precinct with JJ."

With Hotch's instructions set, you took what little time you had left on the flight to go over the causes of death.

"Anything stand out to you on the bodies?" You asked the ME after going over the blunt force trauma and bullet wounds.

"There's tape residue and bruising on the wrists and ankles. Based on the state of bruising, they were likely held for about 3 days before they were killed."

"Thank you for your help." You shook hands, pulling out your phone to call Hotch.

"Hotchner."

"Hotch, they were held for days before they were killed. How did nobody notice they were missing?" There was nothing in the reports that indicated the victims were reported missing prior to being found.

"We just found the same pattern. They all used vacation days for various reasons in the days leading up to their deaths. Meet us back at the precinct and Reid can explain the whole pattern."

"Okay, I'm leaving now." You hung up just as you reached the SUV. Throughout the drive, you couldn't stop thinking that something wasn't adding up.

The victims were taken in the same day. It didn't make sense for the unsub not to escalate. So, why aren't any officers unaccounted for?

Suddenly, a truck crashed into your SUV, sending you flying off the road. A figure dressed in black opened the door and dragged you from the car.

"Agent L/N, it's so good to see you again." A male voice spoke, but you couldn't place it.

He hit you over the head with a handgun before dragging you to his own vehicle.

"Where's L/N?" Emily questioned when her and Rossi returned from the second dumpsite.

"On her way back from the ME." Hotch answered. "Did you find anything useful?"

"They truly are dumpsites. Both bodies were found by dumpsters, sending a pretty clear message." Dave replied.

"Same for the third site." Derek added on.

"All three victims were single and took time off leading up to their death. Nobody would've notice that they were missing until it was too late." Reid supplied the final bit of information gathered.

Hotch's phone rang before anyone else could comment. The frantic sound of Garcia's nails clicking against her keyboard echoed through the phone. She was talking before anyone could greet her.

"You need to see this, check your tablets."

Confused glances were exchanged as everyone, barring Reid, opened their tablets. Reid glanced over Morgan's shoulder to observe as well.

A seemingly live video that Garcia received a link to was streaming to the tablets.

A single woman sitting in a chair could be seen in the frame. Her wrists and ankles were bound to the chair with thick, gray tape and a bag was over her head.

"Garcia, what is this?" Hotch asked almost immediately.

"I was emailed the link just now. It's not streaming anywhere else online." Her reply came quickly, the sound of typing still filling in the silence.

"Can you trace it?" Rossi questioned.

"I'm trying, but it's being routed through multiple proxy servers."

"Did the email say anything?" Emily chimed in.

"No, it was just the link- Wait. I just got another email." She paused as the new email loaded. "It's addressed to Reid."

Every set of eyes in the room turned to Reid.

"What does it say?" He felt the nerves beginning to grow waiting for Garcia to read the words aloud.

"Dr. Reid,

I hope you remember me. What am I saying, of course you do. I've got something of yours that you might want back. You see Dr. Reid, you and your team ruined me. My family, my career, all of it, just gone. I thought I'd return the favor. A person's phone can be so informative. Tell me, does your team know about your girlfriend? I've so enjoyed getting reacquainted with her.

Happy hunting."

Spencer's face went white as he looked at Morgan's tablet again. His thoughts were racing. How did he not recognize you before? Even with the bag over your head, he should've known it was you.

"It's her." His words were barely a whisper.

"This is your girlfriend?" Morgan gestured to the screen again. Spencer could only nod in reply, his mind unable to focus on anything except you.

"Reid, listen to me. You've got to tell us everything you know about her. We'll have to split up. You can go back to Quantico with Emily and Morgan, the rest of us will stay here to work on our current case." Hotch was already devising a strategy to work both cases.

"There's no need." His words made sense to him, but sounded cryptic to the rest of the team.

"Kid, of course there is. We'll help you get her back." Morgan placed a hand on his shoulder, effectively shocking him back to the present situation.

"There's no need to split up because she's here. She's in Montana." Before he could continue, everyone was asking questions.

"Give me a phone number and I'll get you a location." Garcia was already typing away again.

"Are you sure she's here?" JJ's brows furrowed. She did her best to hide the hurt of her best friend hiding his girlfriend from her, again.

"Why would she be here?" Rossi added.

"How did she get here? Maybe we can track the transportation and figure out means of abduction." Emily was the only one thinking about the case.

Like ripping off a bandaid, Spencer blurted out the truth.

"It's Y/N."

He was met with silence in the room as everyone absorbed the information.

Garcia caught up first, a sudden gasp sounding through the phone.

"So, then that's Y/N... in the video..." Her voice wavered.

As if a switch was flipped, the team was back on the case.

"Garcia, get me a list of anyone who would have a grievance with the team." Hotch ordered.

"Go through anyone who was falsely accused. Start with cases in or around Montana. He would want to keep this close to home." Rossi specified.

"We've only had one case in Montana since Y/N joined the team." Reid supplied the knowledge as it came to him. "A name, I need a name." He muttered to himself, pulling his hair as he roughly ran his hands through it and over his face. "Garcia, look into Jameson Braddock."

"Got it." She immediately began a background check, searching through case files and news articles for additional information. "i'll get back to you with locations." With that, she hung up.

"Fill us in, kid. Who is Jameson Braddock." Morgan lead Reid to a chair, gently easing him into it.

"Our last case in Montana, Emily and I went to interview a witness." Emily nodded, the memories slowly coming back to her.

"He wasn't very forthcoming, and then he tried to run." She added on.

"Exactly, except he didn't make it very fair. We arrested him, but it turned out he was only guilty of selling alcohol to minors. When word of his arrest got out, the whole town thought it was for the serial rapes and murders we were investigating even though it was never confirmed."

"By the time we corrected the media, it was too late." JJ supplied, also remembering the man.

"So, he killed three officers just to draw us out back out here?" Morgan refocused the conversation on the current case.

"It looks that way now. The media knew we were coming, so he must have as well." Emily theororized. "If he followed us from the airport, he would've seen Y/N leave by herself."

"He likely didn't know about your relationship until he abducted her and went through her phone." Hotch paced the room.

"He's flaunting his power over us." Rossi chimed in just as Hotch's phone rang again.

"Garcia, what've you got?"

"Three addresses in Billings, Montana. Jameson Braddock has been on a downward spiral since your last trip there. His entire life fell apart, like he said. Divorced, his wife moved to Nebraska with their two kids. He lost his job at the high school, and was evicted from his house when he could no longer pay the bills." She listed the information quickly.

"He has ties to three addresses. Nobody has moved into his previous house, so it's vacant. He's got a small apartment in the northern part of the city which he pays for through working odd hours at Taco Bell. Finally, he briefly worked security at a now abandoned warehouse."

"An apartment wouldn't be enough space to hold her without the chance of someone hearing. She's not there." Rossi eliminated the location as an option.

"We'll split up to cover the warehouse and the house-" Hotch began, but Reid cut him off.

"No, we shouldn't split up. She's got to be at the house. The warehouse has no connection to his previous life. He wants revenge for our perceived wrongdoing, he wouldn't make his last stand at a new location." Reid was already putting on a bullet proof vest. Despite how his mind was racing, he refused to show how afraid he was.

"You're sure?" Morgan asked, on the fence about committing to one location.

"Absolutely." With that, Reid was out the door heading for the SUVs.

"Rossi, Emily head around back. I'll take the front with Reid. JJ and Morgan, the side door." Hotch instructed the team to split up upon arrival at the house.

Reid wasted no time in approaching the house. He was confident you were inside, but he didn't know what was happening to you.

The main floor was cleared quickly. Again, the team split up to cover the upper level and the basement.

Knowing you were likely downstairs, Reid immediately started that direction, JJ and Hotch following him.

It wasn't hard for him to find you. You were still tied to the chair in the middle of the room, bag over your head.

Before anyone could stop him, Reid lowered his gun and ran to you. He gently maneuvered the bag off your head, stopping his movements only when he felt something press into his back.

"Dr. Reid. So kind of you to join us." Braddock spoke maniacally, pressing the gun against Reid's head.

"Drop your weapon." Hotch commanded, but the man only cackled in response.

'Y/N... Y/N." Reid gently shook you in an attempt to wake you up.

"She can't hear you." Braddock singsonged.

"What did you do?" Reid tried to turn to him only to feel the gun press further into his head.

"Like I said in my email, you people ruined my life. They took everything from me, so I thought I'd try to return the favor." During his short speech, Braddock shifted just enough for JJ to get a clean shot.

He fell to the ground, gun clattering across the floor.

Reid moved quickly to remove the tape binding you to the chair while Hotch called for a medic in the basement.

The entire team watched as you were wheeled into the ambulance, still unconscious, none more scared than Spencer.

"She's going to be fine, Spence." JJ tried to reassure him, nonetheless his pacing continued.

"You don't know that. We don't even know what he did to her." He had one hand anxiously running through his hair, the other pinching the bridge of his nose in distress.

Just then, a doctor emerged from behind closed doors.

"F/N L/N." She called into the waiting room, slightly taken aback when the group of agents rushed to her.

"It was touch and go for a while, but she got here just in time." It was visible to even the least qualified profiler how relieved the team felt. Their previously tense shoulders relaxed, frowns turned to small smiles, wide eyes and raised brows pinched together with joy.

"What happened?" Emily posed the question everyone was thinking.

"In short, she was drugged. It's not clear what exactly was used, but it was likely a mix of drugs that attempted to stop her heart."

"Can we see her?" Morgan spoke next, cautiously eyeing Reid.

"You may, follow me." The doctor lead them through a series of hallways to your room. "She should be waking up soon."

With that the doctor left, allowing the team to file into the room. You looked strangely peaceful for someone who almost died.

"So..." JJ glanced between you and Spencer. "Girlfriend, huh?"

His eyes went wide. Instinctively, he turned to you for help, but you were still asleep. He opened his mouth to answer, but no words came out.

"Relax, kid." Morgan grinned. "We're happy as long as you two are happy."

Spencer smiled gratefully, looking at you with an adoring gaze. "We are happy."

"How long?' Emily gestured to your joined hands. Just before Spencer could answer, you groaned.

"I want to hear your guesses first." Your voice was raspy, but there was a clear smile on your face. "Also, what happened?"

The quickly explained the email Garcia received and the events that followed.

"Now that that's cleared up, do tell us how long you think we've been together. I know you've got a bet going." You narrowed your eyes, playfully glaring at each team member.

"4 months." Hotch begrudgingly admitted. JJ followed with 3 months, Derek and Rossi both betting 10 weeks, and Emily going with 6 weeks.

"Ha, you're all wrong." You smiled triumphantly, leaning closer to Spencer.

"Wait, we haven't heard from Garcia." Derek smirked as he rung her on speaker phone.

"Oh, my beautiful crime fighters. Y/N, are you okay?" Your smile widened at the concern in her voice.

"I am indeed, but I have a very important question for you." You glanced as Spencer briefly before continuing. "How long do you think Spence and I have been together?"

"Oh, I know this one!" Her excitement caught everyone but you off guard. "7 months, 2 weeks, and 3 days."

Spencer's jaw dropped as he stuttered out, "that's exactly right..."

"How'd you figure it out?" The group of profilers wore matching expressions of surprise as Penelope explained.

"Well, we had just finished testifying in the Bigelow trial. The whole team went out for drinks, and I could just see it in Y/N's eyes the next day that something wonderful happened. At first I just thought that she got some, but then I saw her and the good doctor in the kitchen getting coffee and I knew." Penelope's voice held a mixture of smugness and pure excitement.

"Babygirl, you didn't tell me?" Derek sounded genuinely offended.

"Y/N asked me not to." Even though you couldn't see her, you knew she punctuated the statement with a shrug.

"You knew, she knew?" Spencer turned to you in shock.

You nodded. "I could see it on her face the second I walked out of the kitchen. But she promised not to tell, so I didn't either."

"The two of you, thick as thieves." Rossi lamented.

"I love you so much." Spencer whispered into your ear as he pulled you in for a hug.

"I love you too." You whispered right back.

"Honestly, I'm glad the secret's out." You smiled at Spencer before looking at the rest of the team. "Although, I wish I didn't have to be kidnapped to tell you."

You spent a few more hours in the hospital before being cleared to go back to the hotel.

The next morning, you smiled to yourself as you were finally able to cuddle with Spencer during the flight home.

Permanent taglist:

@averyhotchner

@jesuswasnotawhiteman

@strawberryspence

@sebastnstn

Criminal Minds taglist:

@mac99martin

@goldeng1rl8

@measure-in-pain

#spencer reid x reaader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fic #spencer reid one shot #criminal minds fic

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wangxianficrecs · 3 years

Photo

Fic Finder

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1. Hi, I'm looking for an Untamed fic, maybe you'll be able to help. It's a canon divergence AU in which WWX doesn't lose his core, Jiang Fengmian lives and it's implied that his core was transferred to JC (heavily implied; JFM retires as the Sect Leader after that). This is absolutely not the most important part of this fic but it's a paragraph that I've got stuck in my head and now I'm searching for the rest @_@ Thanks in advance! ~ @otemporaetmores

FOUND! by @notsobabblespace, who was reminded of I’m aching and I know you are too by edenwolfie (part 3 in series, M, 23k, wangxian)

FOUND! by @jim-is-spocks-thyla, who suggests ❤️ to arrive late is better than not to arrive at all by Moominmammashandbag (M, 35k, wangxian) [ETA: Oops, not this one. JFM has no core, but he didn’t give it to JC]

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2. Hi Mojo! I’m in need of you/your followers help in finding a fic that I read a little while ago. It was a fic where Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi lived together in Cloud Recesses and their children were Sizhui and an OOC that was younger than him. I remember SiZhui faced a lot of criticism for not being the chief cultivator’s real child? And they were happy he had a younger sibling that would be sect leader in the future because he was blood. Come to think of it, this is probably an ABO fic too. Thanks for your time 💜

FOUND! @andidontmeanto believes this is Blue Blood by PotterheadAvengerDemigod (T, 91k, wangxian, my post)

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3. Aksks it's like 3 am but I just remembered a fic and I can't find it?? I'd really, really appreciate your help. It was a wangxian fic, maybe a oneshot idk, and lwj was kind of a nerd and wwx a badboy? So basically lwj has a massive crush on him and dresses up like wwx etc. (i think he even got an undercut) and after a party they sleep with each other at lwj's place?

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4. i’m looking for a fic set in the where lwj’s mother killed his father? i don’t think that was a main plot point but it did show up in his backstory - any idea what this might be? ~ @thehype

FOUND! @rentslirott thinks this could be ❤️the best of you by sysrae (E, 42k, wangxian, my post)

FOUND! @castaways-logbook offers The Right to Care by travelingneuritis (E, 39k, wangxian, WIP)

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5. ... same as #6 ...

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6. Hello friend, sorry for the inconvenience but I wanted to see if you could please find me a fic that I lost but I only remember more or less the final part, it goes more or less like this, lan zhan and wei ying are kidnapped by jin guangyao and lock them up if not I'm wrong in some cells next to lan xichen after the fights jin guangyao dies but lan xichen did know how bad jin guangyao had done and he didn't care and then to get revenge he wants to kill wei ying but lan zhan kills him and sizhui gets scared It was more or less like that, please help me ~ @isa0123lol

FOUND! by @wangxiansfics who says that tragically it’s no longer available, but @dulachodladh found it on WaybackMachine here: Thread and Needle by haysel (M, 86k, wangxian)

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7. Hi, Mojo! I'm glad that you're back but I hope you enjoyed your time off tumblr! Can you and/or your followers help me find a fic? I think the summary was talking about wwx and somehow they were asking mingjue for help since he's the only one who can help. The summary was in italics and it's a dialogue from some guy? And a shorter summary below. Sadly this is the only thing I can remember but I hope you can still help me

FOUND! @alwayswenning suggests love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, wangxian, has it’s own fanfic here, I just finished this last night!, my bookmark)

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8. Sorry to bombard you as soon as you're back, but this one's driving me crazy--a modern AU where they met online. WWX thinks LWJ is an old man from how he talks. I don't remember much except the excerpt made it seem like he still was amused by/enjoyed talking to him, and Wen Qing was telling him it was a bad idea and to stop. It's not How to Fall In Love With a Catfish, tho that one is brilliant! (Also any top notch identity porn would be great) Hope your break was restful, you deserve it! Thanks

Here’s my #identity porn tag, but I’m not sure about this exact story.

I'm the anon for #8 on the fic finder. Though I'm excited to read it, the suggested fic isn't the one I was looking for. I swear I thought I saw it on here around a month ago or slightly more, but searches have failed me.

FOUND! Rating: General Audiences by Mishaa (T, 18k, wangxian WIP) - mysterious author LWJ (speculated to be an old man because of his formality) and infamous artist WWX paired up for an Untamed Big Bang (in an AU where JGY was the series’ antiheroic protagonist; this fic was written before the release of CQL.)

FOUND? could you be looking for Something Real by Latios (G, 5k, wangxian, my post) - wwx thinks lwj is an old man, but there’s no WQ. There are many pictures of bunnies.

SIMILAR! @emilysidhe thought of ID Bro Saga by Bowandtie (T, 39k, wangxian)

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9. Hey, how are you? Could you help me please? I've read 3 fanfics once, but I can't find them anymore. 1 - Nanny Problem, Wei is going to be the babysitter of A-Yuan, he is an omega and Lan is an alpha. 2 - Doctor Perfect, Yibo is an omega nurse and Xiao is an alpha doctor. 3 - The Baby of my Omega, Yibo is omega and Xiao is alpha, both of them are bodyguards, but Yibo has to protect Xiao in the beginning. I think they were at ao3, but I really can't find them. Can you help me please? Thank you!! ~ @weallmad

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10. Hi! Im happy you’re back. I hope you had a good break. I missed your recommendations, but at the same time i got a break from fics and actually studied to my tests haha. [Ah! I’m glad to hear your time was spent productively!] I’m looking for a fic like Linger in the Sun by etymologyplayground. In the fic im looking for wangxian slowly lose their senses instead of all of them at once. Like they lose their hearing, then touch, sight etc, They can’t see each other or hear each other. I’m sorry i can’t explain very well.

FOUND? Could you be thinking of ❤️shadows in the sun rise by Yuu_chi (E, 25k, wangxian)? Only lwj losese his senses one by one in this one, though.

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11. heyyy im trying to find this fic where wwx died the first time he was thrown in to the burial mounds then 10 years later he gets resurrected or something. I can't find it on AO3 and it's been bugging me for days. Thank you!

FOUND! Well, @moku-youbi offers both of these as possibilities:

Did I Not Explain Why the Sunset Turns Red? by 3988Akasha (E, 100k, wangxian)

we're starting at the end by Miss_Enthusiasimal (M, 95k, wangxian)

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12. Hi I am looking for a fic where wwx is a witch (/mage?) in a world where magic is being persecuted (especially in Gusu) except for Yunmeng/Lanling I think but they're still frowned upon nonetheless. Then after accidentally hurting Shijie, wwx runs away, and ends up hiding in Gusu pretending to be a servant to lwj (lwj is a prince, lxc is the emperor) but lwj actually knows of his identity and tries not-so-discreetly to protect him from being caught. Thanks!

FOUND! by @bibliobasilisk who gives us Witchfinder by misbehavingvigilante (E, 86k, wangxian)

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13. Hi! Firstly, I'm glad to see you're back, and I hope your break was a good one! I'm trying to find a LWJ/WWX story that I had planned to read and ending up losing before I could. It was set in the immediate aftermath of the 33 lashes, LWJ is in the Jingshi recovering when a healer(?) discovers he's pregnant (by WWX). It may have been a/b/o verse, but I'm not 100% on that. Part of the story was a flashback to when WWX was still alive. Thank you!

FOUND! by nonny themself. It’s Unexpected Surprise by Glucose_Gremlin (E, 4k, wangxian)

SIMILAR! @mondelgel suggests my heart is kept as pure as ice in a jade vase/一片冰心在玉壶 by Daledesu (M, 21k, wangxian, WIP)

SIMILAR! from @impending-cuttlefish: something new, something white, something blue by ariskamalt (E, 140k, wangxian, WIP)

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14. I'm trying to find this one fic where Jin Ling finds this diary that Wei Ying wrote as the Yiling Patriarch that basically reveals everything, including the golden core reveal and it even has training tips that helps Jon Ling improve. When Wei Ying comes back, he tries everything to keep him there because he is THE best uncle now. I need to find it because it is a N E E D.

FOUND? by @theladypeartree who says, “The Truth (Untold) is jl reading jyl's journals, not wwx's though. And mordant is jl returning wwx's journals that he found, not grew up with. Neither fit #14 properly, but I seriously could not find anything closer after two solid days of searching. Good luck!“

The Truth (Untold) by anxiouswreck0_0 (g, 3k, wangxian, jin ling & wei wuxian)

or this one on ffn:

mordant by tennisnotensai (M, 18k, wangxian, here’s the link for mobile)

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15. I have heard tell of a Sizhui/Jingyi fic where the boys end up going to Wangxian for advice about how to be intimate. Can you help me find it?

FOUND! @manaika-chan says this one is On Advisement by LaMachina17 (M, 19k, wangxian, zhuiling, chengyi)

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16. nm

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17. Hi! Sorry, do you happen to know that nsfw fic where wwx is still studying in the cloud recesses and he’s reading a novel (im not sure if it was from nhs) that features a cultivator couple and there’s a scene in the book where the woman was pegging her husband? Basically wwx got curious about this and tried fingering himself. I remember he was hiding in the back mountains and then lwj eventually caught him

FOUND? Could you be thinking of Deep in the Woods by malkinmalkout (E, 5k, wangxian, my post)?

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18. Ahhh I'm going crazy trying to think of a fic that I've read where Lan Zhan killed Wen Chao in a locker room and nie huaisang stood guard outside the door! Then lan zhan went to lan huan and said I killed someone and he said did they deserve it? Then it's fine. And I can't remember the name of the fic! Have you heard of it? ~ @uchihaautumn

FOUND! @artemisisdiana offers So Full Of Love (Wouldn't Know Where to Start) by witchupbitch (M, 54k, wangxian, WIP)

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19. Hi, I was wondering if you could help me find a fic. I read it a while ago and I don't really remember all the details but it was a modern au where Lan Wangji was a police officer in this small town and Wei Wuxian comes back after years, having left the town due to some stuff. Thank you in advance.

Btw love your blog. I live for your fic recs. [Thank you!]

FOUND? Could you be looking for medium blues by dark_and_terrible (E,193k, wangxian)? It appears to be taken down atm, but it might come back (it’s done it before).

FOUND! by @grannyweatherwaxshat who offers When a Bird Flies, It Leaves Feathers by Bem_Kofi (not rated, 75k, wangxian)

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20. Hi mojo!! First of all I luv your blog Thank you so much for all those ficrecs. [You’re welcome!] Actually I’m looking for a fic I read months ago. I probably found the fic from your blog. But I can’t seem to find it now 😢 it was a modern au wangxian fic (inspired by call me by ur name?) wwx was like 5 years older than lwj. (And lwj was like 16?) Wwx lives in another city but he spent around a year in cloud recesses with lwj in the past. And wwx yanli and jc visits cloud recesses again and wangxian gets 2gether

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[My ko-fi.]

#wangxian fic finder #wangxian #mdzs fic finder #wangxian fic rec

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