#it just really makes me cringe idk why

[quinn-pop]

another halloween thing, consider it the cringe day wednesday special

#happy cringe day wednesday #metadede #i know most of my cringe day wednesdays are for them but it makes me feel so much better abt it #meta has his penguin costume because it was just lying around idk and dedede is tom nook lol #honestly i couldn’t think of anything for Kirby or bandee so i just stuck with bluey #also ribbon is dressed as mariposa from barbie or something idk I haven’t watched that one in years #kirbyposting #my art or something #meta knight #king dedede #kirby #ribbon kirby #bandee #quinn does comics #am I still getting fluff out of my system or something? genuinely i don’t know why i drew this #cute though #i feel like ive been doing so many things i really want to think deeply abt and do justice so to do something like this #just a little bit plain and silly and not innovative or anything #and i dont mean that in a pat my own back way i mean that in a ‘quinn pls not everything has to be deeper’ way #idk it feels nice doing that #do you think meta surprise kissed him in an attempt to do a sharing kiss? i didnt think abt this until a little bit ago and i won’t say #that it’s the case but it’s kinda funny to me lol

[kinos-fortress-2]

idk comfort characters moment ig

#i should REALLY stop doodling around and start doing more serious art #anyways this is not shipp art btw i dont shipp them for me they are like brothers best friends even #demoman #miss pauling #tf2 #team fortress 2 #kino art #idk i just feel like drawing sad demo i think he got too much going on in that little head full of beer and depression... #and well he just needs a hug and venting for real and not making it much of a joke #IDK I WAS JUST LISTENING TO MITSKI AND LAMP AND BOOM sad doodle i guess #i think for demo is a bit hard to find a good time to vent and well his team kinda sucks for that #same goes w miss p this two are full of shit in their heads so why not listening w each other and crying idk #its been a time since i have draw demo... #those fucking hands... i hate often times drawing hands #idk why i made tf2 sad art i think is funny but who cares cringe is free look at me doing lovey dovey and sad art haha laugh at this guy

[derpinette]

girls being nice to me gets me higher than ecstasy ever could

#SORRY for the corny post but this is how i truly feel not waxing poetic here like literally it does #i just met the cool girl i keep talking about & IT WAS SÅ FREAKEING ÅSUM ^_^_^_^_^_^ YAY #HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY HAPPY HAPPY JOY #OK sorry for screaming But i really am very excited... #turns out she is autistic & we discussed our neuroses while eating & ugh she is just as cool as i thought she was #always tell people you think have Swag that you noticed it on them see how it worked for me #i was so scared of spilling my spaghettis but turns out that was exactly what i needed to do to be friends ^_^ YAY #we went to a lot of different libraries together & i got a small old eyeless bunny plush from the event we went to caus i felt bad for it #i even showed her my pony art & i told her about my cringe interest (that music event i like...♯RealOnesKnow ) #& she thought it was COOL.& i felt like it was really genuine & she talked about reading BL LOL we discussed fujos together #we even talked about finding moids ugly #it was so awesome she was so cool & Nice To Me... i feel like i am on CUMULONIMBUS ( cloud 9 ) ^_^_^_^_^_^ #talking to her in person was so much better than online OMG now i wish i really was friends with you muties IRL #i wish you a Girl Friend experience just like this to those who post about wanting them i really do #also the reason why i even like my Music Event so much is because the first time i watched it was with a bunch of women #& i had so much fun & they were so nice to me i keep returning & now that Event means so much to me & I LOVE IT sorry (NOT) #i know this sounds like tumblrina fiction i would not believe it either IDK what to say to make it sound legitimate 0_0 like it is so crazy #to me as well IDK i can barely get over it & IDK if i really want to so um well YAY ^_^ AIMU SO HEPI :DDD

[transcicle]

who up getting autistic over a podcast theyve never seen

more under cut idk if theyll format or not... beware

some of these i just did some of these are old

some of these are the drawing style thing i did sooo.... in order... : FIRST THROUGH FOURTH IMAGE peter drew those :-) FIFTH rumi drew that one :-) SIXTH exandroth drew those :-) SEVENTH peter drew that one :-) self portait EIGHTH rumi [bad at art edition] both NINE and TEN i dont remember if they were ment to be peter or just me goofin... so picjk ur poison LOL ELEVEN thats peter LAST THREEEE meeeeee :3 9-10 and 12-14 are the older ones everything else i did last night / this mornin'

#jrwi #jrwi apotheosis #angelstone #sqlumi #................i prefer sqlumi.... why did name it angel stone thats like exandroth + peter not rumi + peter its confusing to me #im sorry i watched the angelstone cut like half a year ago #IM SOOO AUTISTIC ABOUT THEM YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA MAN YOU HAVE NO CLUE SOSHAKSHLSXHLDHDJDJKRKFKF #i cant contain it anymorw im going to post my cringe #quite a few of these ones are from my little handwriting drawing things where i make up their handwriting and art style tee hee #i think rumi either SUCKS ASS at drawing or can decently draw in an anime esque style #i imagine peter has a lil bit of artistic abilities... he did paint a ton of mug paintings if i remember right???? #he aint the best but he can do it #thanatos has 0 skill because he has never drawn anything ever until this hypothetical situation where theyre drawing and writing this all #exandroth adapts peters skill to an extent #peter tries to follow the rules taught to him about writing as a child to a T soooo he has generally neat handwriting if hes thinking abt i #but if hes tired or just out of it idk #you cant get one word man that shit is just complete chicken scratch even he cant figure it out sometimes LOOLLLL #rumi also has very neat handwriting HOWEVER i love the idea that she hams it up to be really swirly like that one girl in elementary #thanatos is very stiff and neat might as well just be font... #exandroth is either writing in full caps or alternating between whatever ver of a letter he wants to write at any time #VERY heavy handed and goes over every line like 3 times #when writing his name EVERYTIME he writes exandroth archangel of retribution everytime #if you guys wanna see what i have so far.... you can ask.... hehe #theyre my ocs at this point man i havent seen the damn campaign #i would just make them my ocs but my brain immediately loses interest whenever i do that uuuuggghhhhg #i mean i have a beast moomin furry thing peter and an object oc peter bur #*but like idk #btw i have like waaayyy more to say but i reached tag limit <////333 tumblr hates autistic people real #ill just retype it all in the next post ^.^* #archive

[mumpsetc]

I, Like Every Brony in the Modern Day It Seems, Really Like Vylet Pony But IMO Her Work Lacks That Same Punch Shit Like Cats Millionaire or SGaP Had. It's Not That Its More Fandom Based, Plenty of SGaP and Cats Millie Was That Too But It Just Feels More Disconnected From the Characters AND Specific Fandom Interpretations, It's Too General to Really Hook Me the Same Way

#Like OK What About Fluttershy Makes You Interpret Her as a Scene Kid Gir Hoodie Pony? Why are Maud and Derpy in Love? #Why is Pinkie Specifically the Lesbian Pony W/ a Chainsaw? (I Know The Answer to This One Im Just Whining) #Antonymph Esp Bothers Me in a Stupid Way. DGMW I Do Love the Song a Lot But Its Too GENERAL to Be Narrowed in on Fluttershy #And I Get It Isnt Technically About Her Its About Me the Listener But Its a Hurdle I Cant Just Easily Jump! #I Do Need to Listen to More Ive Only Listened to Cutiemarks and the Things That Bind Us and Tales From Equestria #Ive Heard Great Things About Carousel #And I Do Think Cutiemarks is a Good Ass Album I Do Love the Titletrack and Think the Exploration of Cutiemarks as a Concept in That Album #Are Really Good #I Just Love Pony Music When It Feels Like an Encapsulation of the Character or Concept and VP Just Feels Too Disconnected for That to Me #I Will Say Though the Production on Her Work is a Lot Easier to Just Toss On and Listen To. When I Got Sgap or Cats Millie On I Am in a MOD #And VP I Can Enjoy Basically Anytime So Her Accessibility is Definintely a Bonus Too #IDK Dont Listen to Me Im Just Somepony With Too Many Opinions on This. Sgap Was My Third Most Listened to Artist According to Spotify #Anyways if Antonymph Was Gonna Be a General Anti-Cringe Song It Shouldve Used a BG Pony and If It Was Gonna Be a Character Song #It Shouldve Been About Twilight #Also Rarity is Really OOC in Cutiemarks I Do Not Like Syndicate and Nonexistant Meet Cute is Good But #BUT... #Eh Whatever The Tags are Like Triple the Fuckin Post #Dreamy.txt

[critterishere]

don’t know what to post so here’s this drawing i have of these little guys that have been sitting in my drafts for two days

#my art #oc art #traditional drawing #self insert #wishing that monsters were real rn😭😖 #need to find a name for the spider dog creature #might post deltarune stuff soon #also getting used to posting more self insert stuff and not cringing at myself #i feel great👍 #that one drawing i posted with me and jun tho 🤨🤨🤨 #why do i say that like it was really bad or something the drawing was literally just me hugging him from the side #i need to calm down bout the jun post #also side note idk why i like making weird tiny pet creature versions of my characters like idk it’s fun #ok i’m gonna stop rambling now bye 👋

[gregmarriage]

really think i need to make more irl friends, but it feels so impossible. like most of the ppl my age seem to only hang out in bars, and it’s like sorry, i’m uncool and can’t drink, bc i’m on medication. and making friends via dating apps or something similar is abysmal. so, i’m kinda stuck imaooooo

#i’m aware not everyone hangs out in bars but might have reasons why they can’t hang out #elsewhere like in coffee shops or restaurants or parks or something #bc i certainly do #maybe there’s people who feel the exact way i do and can’t or don't want to leave the house bc of extenuating circumstances #like it’s difficult for me to leave the house #do i want to? yes but that doesn’t negate the difficulty #trying to make friends in general feels like pulling teeth #after a lifetime of autism and social anxiety i’m literally not fully convinced i even know how to communicate i just fell ass backwards #into stuff a lot of the time #trying to put myself out there in any way is literally so incredibly cringe to me #even if i do want to but again doesn’t negate the difficulty #but also again don’t know how to talk to people so even if by some miracle i make friends i might not get to keep them #idk it’s all just so frustrating #i envy the people who can make friends no problem and can talk to people and talking to said people doesn’t wear them out even if you really #like them bc social interaction is exhausting with anyone #but like it’s obviously worse when it’s new #bc small talk actually makes me want to stick forks in my eyes #i wish it were easy but it isn’t #idk i want my independence back and i want my freedom and i want irl friends again #and i want the world to stop feeling so closed off bc i know it isn’t #it’s just hard to see it that way from being bed bound most of the time #and that isn’t gonna change anytime soon #but i wanna open up the world again and i wanna go outside #and making irl friends is part of but i have absolutely no idea where to start #and the cycle continues #christ i almost wish i were back in college with the ‘girl gang’ #i mean i felt like a huge outsider to them but at least i kinda had people to hang out with #idk desperately need to open my life up again bc literally no one can live like this and i’ve already been manic once this year #and i’d like to not be in that bad of a place again if i can help it #but idk what to do currently so 🤷🏻‍♀️

[hydrasaura]

when i said that mha ripped off naruto (which i said only to piss off mha stans anyway) I didn't mean to sound like i was praising naruto. it was actually more like a sigh of disappointment, a reaction to seeing that all the problems that naruto had as a show transpired trough mha too and i was tired because watching naruto was enough for me but then i realized that my problem actually is that i can no longer stand watching shonen anime and i chose not to tire myself by cringing at the repetitive tropes and cliches anymore

#demon slayer falls under the same category sadly #actually it was more a combination of these 2 that made me realize that i had enough of this genre #me judging other shonen having as reference only naruto #but look! i watched both mha and demon slayer and my personal point was proven that i would get bored by them #(with the exception of some rare moments that were really good in mha but the bad and cringe moments made me forget abt them) #like i remember crying bcs this dude who trained deku died but then i remembered that a few episodes earlier he ''punished'' #one of his female students by tying her up a ledge and tickling her with a feather :| #LIKE WHY DID YOU NEED TO PUT THAT IN THE STORY? HORIKOSHI OR WHATEVER THE MANGAKA'S NAME IS #WHY YOU FELT THE NEED TO ADD THAT IN??? #and then you tried to make me feel sorry for the guy too? #that was such a jiraya death moment like they were playing it a sad but all i could think abt was ''rip bozo'' #not saying that other anime don't have cringe moments. even moments that i had to skip because of how gruesome they were #but they sorta make sense in the big picture of the story? but other characters experience it too not just a category of people? idk #also it's funny how pissed mha stans get for having their show insulted like #when i tell ppl that my fave anime/manga are evangelion; black lagoon #and berserk they look at me like i deserve to be put in an electric chair #like they are right but at the same time i find it funny and i rly don't care #but these guys always go bananas if you insult their fav show as if you broke the geneva convention #i'd say that it's because the majority of the fans are children but i know for a fact that they are not 😭

[opens-up-4-nobody]

hi so so sorry if this sounds genuinely deranged but I need to know did you write a fanfiction in like 2014 that was set during ww2 where zoro from one piece was sent to a japanese internment camp and sanji went to conversion therapy I remembered it recently because it blew my mind at age 13 and I had to reread it + need a kind of where are they now with the author so if that's you 1) what's your stance on the fic today 2) how much of the research was done during writing and how much did you just know beforehand and used as inspo 3) did you have any ideas for where the other characters ended up because I did always wonder if like idk chopper overcame the trauma of being in the war and also just what usopp's situation would be in general what with the political climate. once again. if you didn't actually write this fic so sorry this must look like the ravings of a crazy person. godspeed

Hi. Uh, yeah I did write that fic. I would have been like only 17 at the time. I did do A LOT of research, like the fic was basically an excuse for me to research Japanese internment and WWII history in general bc I thought it was super fucked up. I was absolutely hyperfixated on the topic and my parents probably thought i was nuts for my ability to talk at length on this particular area of history. I just finished skim reading back through the fic and woof. What a bleak fucking story. I was very cruel to everyone. It's frustrating bc I think it's an interesting and compelling idea for a story. But to me it feels like: here is all the research I did and also characters talking in what feels like a too modern way. Plus, I was 17 and didnt understand people very well. I wish I had the energy and motivation to rewrite it. Although, I forgot I used to do song lyrics at the start of each chapter and the tonal dissonance of Owl City lyrics at the top of a chapter of harrowing events around the time of WWII is unfathomablly unhinged.

#as for where r they now? i forgot the last chapter was like fuck u nothing matters life goes on sanji probably died of lung cancer #like jesus dude calm down. i think now id give them a bit of a softer ending #like i mean sanji still prob dying of lung cancer but he lives a long life with zoro and thry make the most of the time they have together #and i mean when u see horrific things in war i imagine its something u never really get over but i think the crew members that became #soldiers go on to live fuffilling lives and usopp finds a stable and relatively well paying job. gets married and lives happily ever after #god. its so frustrating to me that ill probably never rewrite this. it could habe been so good #but i just dont have thst kind of energy. i do think abt this fic more than almost all my other tho #im glad u liked it anon. its a fucking unhinged fic just from the perspective of: rural ohio teen wants to research a fucked up aspect of #ww 2 history and decides to write a fucking fanfic abt it. like bro what why. but idk weird weird times #there could have been themes and exploration of trauma and adversity. complex relationships. but no u get cringe written by a child #and now at the age of nearly 26 i am old and tired. christ thst was almost 10 years ago. i was a whole different human #weird the fanfics that stick with u. i have many i think abt from hs. wonder where the authors r now... #unrelated #i also forgot that in the authors nots i was like: if u r a n4zi fucking kill yourself. #which i standby but i was not expecting to see thst in the notes of a one piece fic i wrote as a kid good god

[pepprs]

gonna delete this later bc i know it’s unproductive to screenshot / namedrop and i actually am thinking the best approach would just be to privately share this thought w the dev who posted this in a possibly futile attempt to effectively advocate for the change i want to see (#worktag2 lol). but im workshopping it here w my beloved mutuals first as i always do which is kinda shooting myself in the foot given that the devs can probably see that but whatever. my thought is like… i get it. i really do. i get that this place needs to stay afloat and some of that is gonna involve sacrifice or something from everyone involved. but… why would you try to snuff out the things that make this place what it is and just make it like all the other places. why would you not even take into account how the changes are going to impact EXISTING users who are loyal even if they don’t pay. people aren’t going to come to tumblr for more tiktok and instagram. they’re going to come here for tumblr. for the anonymity and the customization and whatever. so like i just don’t get it. why is the solution to this problem to experiment with changes **that existing users won’t like** and not to listen to what existing users want and do more of it bc other ppl likely will want that too.

#purrs #idk my thoughts aren’t organized and i have a stomachache so im not thinking clearly and ik i also was trashing staff earlier and that so ma #many ppl must be sending them hate and shit and i know there are probably better ways to go about things. but it’s like.. i do not feel like #i matter and belong as a long time tumblr user 😃 like why would you say this. it’s kind of like a big fuck you to the people who are here es #especially since there have been experimental features (like polls) ppl here have been wanting to see forever. like why can’t you work WITH #us instead of becoming another soulless algorithm wasteland. it just fucking sucks to feel like we don’t matter and we’re not being listened #to. and i get it like this is an age old story. but it sucks. it really does. #delete later #like idk. it just sucks to see a dev say that. why would it not even matter to you what existing users want and need and think. idk #like instead of removing the ‘it’ to get… why not just… idk. make it easier to get. instead of eliminating the it. you know? #ive been mad abt this all day which is cringe / dumb bc it’s the pikaman sword lady crab blue checkmark ‘hellsite’ and i don’t want to buy i #into the cringe staff blog persona but like. tumblr is a lifeline to me and this is just so upsetting lol

[mushroomjar]

Sorry but you are not going to convince me to watch the Tokyo Mew Mew reboot

#i'm glad y'all are having fun with it but i genuinely think i would not enjoy it #i liked the original well enough and i don't really want the reboot to be people's introduction to tokyo mew mew #the original one is definitely a bit cringe and aged but. it's not bad it's really fun #idk it's just weird that they're rebooting so many of the classic magical girl shows instead of... making new shows? #i understand the sailor moon reboot bc the 90s show was very very different from the manga and also has too many episodes and movies #so wanting a separate show/movies that are closer to the manga and shorter makes sense #but like. i'm only 18 episodes in to ccs but why did that show need a reboot? #same for tmm. tmm is fine it didn't need a reboot it came out 20 years ago it's not that old it didn't NEED a reboot also quote me on this: #the og tmm anime looks much. MUCH. cuter than the reboot. and you know i'm right!! you know i'm right #the designs are also better and from what little i've heard of the reboot the story of the original made more sense #rant over i guess #cat rambles

[timewontwait]

honestly at this rate, i’m considering going back to fic writing/drawing fan works full swing

#🌀 — later guys! i’m outta here. ❪ ooc. ❫ #vent // #don't get me wrong i still love rping. i'm still gonna do it #it still makes me super happy whenever i see new interactions pop up in my inboxes - even if i never end up getting to them #but hoogh.. i'll be honest besties - this past year has been challenging #idk how to describe it really without sounding like a loser dkasdafjdl but the tldr is mental illness and #writing in a space where feedback isn't always guaranteed doesn't mix well for me #which is why i'm kinda debating fanfic again because i STILL get comments and kudos from a fic i worked on back in 2016 #even though its full of flaws and cringe moments i still am so touched that there are ppl out there that still enjoy it in its full #teenaged toby angst glory kgjsdkj #what does that mean for my blogs and activity if i do wind up getting back into that kinda thing? dunno yet. #but i'll still BE here #and i will still probably respond to stuff (just slowly.. i am not fast like sonic T hedgehog) #jussst yeah. thinking it'll be good for me to pursue other hobbies and passions too #oh yeah i feel like i need to clarify - this has nothing to do with anything recent #it's been a gradual feeling

[eijiroukiriot]

it’s like every day i flipflop back and forth between “katsuki should say ‘eijirou’ as many times as he can all the time. ‘eijirou come look at this’ ‘jesus christ eijirou it’s 7 a.m.’ ‘eijirou, steak or fish tonight’” and “i need krbk to call each other baby or else i’ll die” 

#idk if it's obvious from the every piece of content i've made in the last 6 months but i've like been stuck on this one #and not to like accidentally peek a little deep into my psyche but it might be bc for the brief time i had a gf last year #we dove like REALLY hard and heavy into the pet names #i did not enjoy being in a relationship with her (largely bc it was so affectionate so fast) but. i did like the affection #and honestly thinking back on the times where we did call each other 'baby' specifically it felt like so much bigger than 'babe' #which is probably why it sounds so gross to some people but the more time goes by and the more i think abt what an actual good #relationship would look like to me. the more i feel like being able to say 'baby' and not have it be cringe would be a factor #which is why i've been so stuck on making things that make krbk say baby. as stupid as it is #i really do love bkg saying eijirou and think that's the more in character option anyway #sometimes your krbk has just gotta be a little self indulgent though you know? #and other times it can be realistic and so so good #if this fic i started last month ever does see the light of day....and it might bc i do like the premise #it'll maybe be the most realistic take on bkg as a part of krbk that i've ever written #not to keep rambling but also thinking back on the way i've written bkg over the years i really do think his character lends itself to #a lot of levels of realistic vs indulgent #weird wording but i'll explain #in canon he's so analytical and thoughtful at heart you know? but he's also 16 and brash and impulsive and plain dumb sometimes #once again thinking about how i didn't actually like him that much on my first watch until the latter half of s2 #where his characterization starts to become a little more day-to-day instead of really heavy digging into HIS psyche #so he just shows up over and over again to get mad about something stupid and it's endearing #like 'who is this guy' #so you can write a bkg who's very out of his element and hotheaded and thinks of himself differently than he actually comes off #or you could write a bkg (like the bkg as of late) who's very in control and calculating and doesn't let his guard down #neither side is technically inaccurate but it can be hard to strike a balance bc those things sound very out of sync with each other #so within krbk you can write a very 'actions speak louder than words' bkg who is kinda neutral-cold most of the time #or you can write the goofier 'i won at romance and i'm gonna rub it in your faces' easily swept off his feet fandom favorite bkg #which can be very good #and if anything the fact that he really does keep his guard so high up so often makes you WANT to write him being sappy #especially when he's grown up #have i ever mentioned that like the stock photo of krbk in my mind has aged up?

[meat-pvppet]

GAAAAH THE HORRIBLE CRINGE NEED TO ACTUALLY WRITE OUT MY FUNGER SONA 

#.txt #anyway hi im brain dumping here #so i was remembering the times i had some pretty scarily accurate tarot card readings for some people who asked me for some in school #i know that sounds really im like so the main character teehee but yeah #but yeah i was remembering those times and i was like hey what if daan had a tarot card reading from someone and got absolutely demolished #in "oh wow you are extremely tragic and life is really not going your way #so uh #brain began to brain and now i am holding every single fiber of my being back from writing a serious character thing for my funger sona #mostly out of fear of being cringe for #idk #my belief system around tarot cards and tarot readings n witchcraft??? #idk i just feel like ill be hunted for sport if i talk about that publicly online #which is why i dont really use my old witchcraft blog that often anymore #but thats beside the point #writing this makes me feel delusional but i just need to brain dump about this before i explode into a million billion pieces

[gregmarriage]

i may know it’s healthy to interact with people and be social, but that doesn’t mean i find it easy in any way

#like i don’t actually mean to isolate myself i just get lost in doing my own thing #which isn’t bad in itself #but then i find myself feeling sad and idk why #bruh you haven’t spoken to your friends in quite a while #if i was a sim my social bar would be red #but i still don’t wanna talk to people sometimes #like i have to physically force myself just to say ‘hey! #everyone pray for gwen’s social life bc it sucks and isn’t really getting any better even tho i’m trying my hardest #i do wanna push myself more and talk to ppl i’ve always wanted to talk to #but my stupid brain won’t let me #i’m trying to push past it though #it would be nice to make new friends that i then neglect bc i’m bad at friendship #idk maybe that isn’t fair #but i still wouldn’t say i’m great at it #idk i just feel dumb for begging people to talk to me #or even just sending messages to new people #or even my friends who i know won’t judge me but still #idk i’m still sensitive after my episode and i just feel embarrassing and annoying and like i’m bugging people #and i believe them when they say i’m not but it doesn’t stop completely me from feeling that way #literally ‘hey’ feels like i just pissed on the floor in front of them #like god! way to be annoying gwen!! #yes i know it’s my brain talking but literally i use up so much energy trying not to feel it #and so much letting myself feel it #and i only have so much energy as it is #not that it matters #bc most ppl don’t care as long as i check in sometimes #but again i repeat my earlier statement #don’t wanna check in i feel cringe #need friends and communication but cannot maintain them #like the 100th post i’ve made but it’s what my thoughts are currently

[cerealmonster15]

ougugugughghhh i get,,, so embarrassed when i try to be Earnest lol especially w/in the context of like fanart/fic like i LOVE when other people do it i LOVE reading earnest and vulnerable deep fics and seeing intense fanart etc etc etc. but then i do it i feel like i am Going To Be Killed LJFDKSLF SDJFLS

#yknow like??? if i do ANYTHING other than my funny ha ha sillies <-which i love btw. my fave thing to do ever #but if i try something Different i feel like im CRINGE for trying bc im not. good at it?? #or like im Trying Too Hard?? I GET SO EMBARRASSED #anyway i got jumpscared by a jami/azu i found from last year #and i mean /i/ like it but. i feel like i would die if i posted it #im p sure ididnt post that one i just sent it to my friend on discord #and then even that still made me Feel Embarrassed lol #SORRY GOD idk why im airing out so much internal feelings today lol #can i really blame it on the caffine. can i. god i really need to find a new therapist lol i cancelled the old one but #havent found a replacement yet jklfjsdl oopsie. but like how do u talk to a therapist about this shit anyway lol #i dont. WANT to tell them about tumblr thats EMBARRASSING #sorry this all boils down to im very insecure and always have been l o l #like it's FINE ill be FINE im just oughhghghghgh yknow? #i guess im better than i used to be bc. i post way more than i used to re:drawing and writing lol but #i do have fits of panic where im like #🧍‍♂️am i delusional. perhaps my mutuals/followers r just politely humoring me #and i am simply making A FOOL of myself #maybe!!!!!!!!!!! i dont know #not that i think anyones out to get me or anything i just hfhhhshhdhsghf #i lost track of what i was talking about #anyway shoutout to people who r nice sorry i have a hard time absorbing it lol thats a ME problem not anyone else