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mickeyswhore · 6 months

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Foreign Beauty

A/N: Might get in a silly goofy mood and write a part 2, let me know if I should. 💕

Summary: After your father made you attend Oxford, you took a detour during the holidays to Birmingham and there you met Thomas Shelby, and the two of you got pulled towards one another.

Thomas Shelby x Reader

Warnings: toxic father, smut (a little bit though)

Tag: @mrkdvidal1989.

You hated your father now, he made you go to Oxford university. You wanted to only live in

Paris and be able to just live your life and buy pretty dresses and have fun with your friends, but not now, you needed to be in a gloomy town with people that can’t even dress properly and that made you angry.

“Father, if you insist on me getting an education why not Paris? We already have a place there.” You had no idea why your father wanted you to pursue an education, it was only a matter of time until you were married off for an alliance anyway.

“You cannot be just a ditsy woman that only thinks about what’s on her body, you must feed your mind. End of discussion.” With that your father left you and you went to your room to cry.

How could he do this to you? Wasn’t enough that he was a criminal and you could never bring your friends to where he was? The fact that your mother left and he never allowed for you to have a relationship with her? Every single thing about your life was about your father, and no doubt that he wanted bragging rights to all of his associates of how he had his only daughter to attend Oxford.

If you had to do this, you wouldn’t be caught dead in British clothes. You told your father that you would get a new wardrobe with the latest Parisian fashion, if you can’t change your father’s mind, you would definitely make his wallet hurt. That was exactly what you did, went to Paris and ordered a whole new wardrobe to all of the fashion houses that you could think of. Your father was furious but didn't want to say anything, as long as you were going to university, nothing else mattered to him.

------------------------------------------

The boat trip to Cardiff was long and dreadful, and to make things even worse it was raining in Wales, as usual. Your father’s men were waiting for you, and you had so many suitcases that it filled both cars. People in England took their time to stare at you, it always happened, you would never brag but your were a pretty woman in a pretty dress in gloomy Wales, people will stare. You got into the car and waited for your father’s men to be done with loading the cars.

The drive was boring and it was raining in most places, so you decided to take a nap. You woke up with commotion in the car and two of the men were fighting in the front of the car.

“What is happening?” You realised that the car was stopped, and the other two men were outside in the rain trying to fix it.

“Sorry, ma’am but the car broke down and we are nowhere near Oxford, we’re in Birmingham.” You saw a map pf England once and was confused, these are the men that your father employs? You took a deep breath and grabbed your umbrella and left the car, there seemed to be a pub nearby. “Wait, ma’am where you’re going?” One of the men tried to stop you but you kept walking.

“It’s cold, it’s raining and I saw a pub here. Could you please let me know when we can go?” He nodded and you kept walking towards the pub. When you entered the smell of cigars and booze hits your nostrils, and the warmth as well, it wasn’t that crowed so you simply took a booth and removed your very expensive fur coat.

You bought a drink and again all of the men and women were staring at you and you needed to get used to it. You were starting to get bored, maybe going back to the car was the best option. When you were about to leave, both doors were opened and a few men came in, they must be important since everyone got out of their way, you saw the one with the biggest blue eyes you’ve ever seen in your life and the man was incredibly attractive.

The man noticed you quite fast since you were the only one staring at him, quite unabashedly as well. He went to your table and sat down right in front of him, with a grin on his face, that made you smile.

“Never seen you here before.” You smiled, never having the opportunity to interact with people that weren’t from your father’s circle. “I would’ve noticed if I seen you here before, who are you love?” He seemed genuinely interested and you were basking on the attention. You said your name to the man.

“We lost our way to Oxford and the car broke down so I decided to come here and be warm with a drink. May I ask who you are?” You took a sip of your drink and the two of you couldn’t stop smiling at each other.

“I’m Thomas Shelby. Pleased to meet you.” He extended his hand and you shook it, and the two of you couldn’t deny that you felt something when the two of you touched. “Would you like another drink, love?” You nodded and Thomas went to get your drink, after he came back, he sat down near you.

“You’re quite forward, aren’t you Mr. Shelby?” You grinned at him and he seemed very pleased with himself.

“I have to, with a foreign beauty like yourself, someone might steal you away.” Thomas was being coy, he knew that no one would dare to talk to you with him there, but he wanted to make you feel special and also acknowledge the fact tht all of the men wanted to be with you.

“You don’t have faith that you are the most interesting?” You quickly realised that you love to tease Thomas Shelby.

“I know that I am, it simply might not be the case for you.” He wasn’t boring, you had to give him that and also confident, a man has never looked as attractive as he is now.

“Touche, Mr. Shelby.”

The two of you started talking about other things, politics mainly. But also art, and history. You were much younger than Thomas but he didn't mind it all and you loved the fact that he was older, mature and most importantly, confident.

The two of you were touching each other, his hand were on your thigh and your hand in his arm as well. The tension between the two of you was getting worse, the two of you even stopped talking just to keep looking at each other and touching each other. Thomas leaned into your ear, sending shirvers down your spine.

“Should we go somewhere more private, love?” He whispered in your ear and you only nodded, guiding him towards the bathroom.

When the two of you got there, Thomas put you against the wall and started to kiss you. His kiss was full of hunger and passion and you were more than happy to indulge him, you needed this too. Thomas started removing your dress and you removed his shirt, you were only dressed in your undergarments now, and Thomas still had his trousers. He started kissing your neck, drawing moans out of you.

Your hands went to his cock, he was painfully hard and you could tell that he was painfully hard. Thomas removed your bra without you even noticing, you felt his warm lips on your nipple, making you moan, with one of his hands Thomas started playing with your other nipple. His tongue felt like heaven on one nipple and his fingers were twisting and pulling the other, you were panting and moaning. You’ve never felt this way before, your pussy was clenching around nothing and you were so wet. The pressure on your pussy was increasing with every lick of one nipple and the pulling of the other.

“Tommy.” You whispered and a strangled moan espcaped your throat, Thomas stopped his ministrations and looked at you, he had the smugest look on his face.

“Did you just cum from me just playing with your nipples, love?” Thomas’ hands removed your panties and he started fingering you and playing with your clit. You closed your eyes from how much pleasure you were receiving but he was having none of it. “Keep your eyes on me, love.” That’s what you did, you’ve met this man a couple hours ago and he already had so much power over you. With his thumb making small circles on your clit and two fingers deep inside your pussy, Thomas wanted to make you cum as quick as he possibly could. “You look divine like this, love. I need you to cum for me. Can you do that, eh?” The noises that were being made were lewd, if you could think straight you would definitely be embarrassed by them.

As if Thomas has full control of your body, you cum again, Thomas enjoys the feeling of your pussy clenching around his fingers, he couldn’t wait to fuck you. Thomas was helping you ride out your second orgasm when you heard yelling coming from outside, the two of you looked at each other and out your clothes back on in a matter of seconds.

“What is going on ‘ere?” Thomas yelled, and the men that were with him fighting with your father’s men, you slapped Thomas’ men hoping they would stop assaulting your employees.

“Are you alright, ma’am?” One of father’s men asked you, clearly terrified that something happened to you.

“Of course, is the car ready?” All four of them nodded and if this wasn’t a sign for you to stop doing something you’d later regret, you don’t know what is.

You were about to leave when Thomas stopped you with a gentle pull of your arm.

“Leaving so soon, love?” He seemed almost sad that you were leaving, that made you smile.

“I’m going to Oxford university, if you want me come get me when you can.” You winked at him and he smirked at you.

He was going to get you, alright. With that, you left the pub to the car.

#thomas shelby x reader #tommy shelby x reader #peaky blinder fanfic #thomas shelby fanfic #tommy shelby imagine #tommy shelby fanfic #tommy shelby smut #peaky blinders fanfic

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f1letters · 1 year

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anti-hero | cl16

"I wake up screaming from dreaming, one day, I'll watch as you leaving"

summary: no matter how many times charles told her she was more than enough, this misogynistic world kept giving her reasons to run away

warning: a little bit of angst but fluffy end, driver!reader, Williams!reader, kind of secret/private relationship, mentions of parental abandonment, daddy issues (cause same lol), misogynistic and degrading comments towards the reader, slut shamming, swearing, self-sabotage, low self-esteem, anxiety, just an overload of ups and downs, platonic!reader x alex albon

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

word count: 3.6k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past.

french words used: mon ange = my angel; mon amour = my love

is it possible to fall in love with your own fictional character? cause I think I just did! hope you enjoy this (not really surprising haha) anti-hero story!

masterlist

I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser

Midnights become my afternoons

When my depression works the graveyard shift, all of the people

I've ghosted stand there in the room

Life seemed to be falling apart for Y/N.

In the middle of the dark room, the only noises that filled the deafening silence were the ticking sound coming from the big clock on the wall, and the troubled thoughts that seemed to reappear in her head night after night.

Tick. Tock.

Time passed and passed, but Y/N remained there, frozen, haunted by her own demons.

To be completely frank, life had never really felt right for the young woman.

The battle in her head was something usual, ever since she was just a little girl. It didn't matter how old she got, she never got wiser.

It felt completely unreasonable how she could feel herself drowning in sadness when just hours before she had had one of the happiest days of her life.

Charles's strong arms wrapped around her shoulders, the skin of her back against his warm chest, their eyes fixed on the dazzling sunset before them on the clear waters of Monaco, as they lay on the bed of his yacht.

The warm tones that painted the skies and waters were intoxicating, as was Charles's presence.

As much as she tried to keep her attention on that magical gift of nature, Y/N could only thank fate for having that wonderful man by her side.

I don't know what I did to deserve you, she thought to herself.

"Mon amour?" The Monegasque's voice woke her from her trance. "Do you think we... Forget it, it's silly."

The girl turned towards her boyfriend, their eyes now connected, just inches apart. "What is it, Charles? You know you can tell me anything." She said, though her anxiety was already starting to creep up in her stomach.

He took a deep breath, gathering all the courage in him, and with her eyes shining brighter than ever, she asked. "Do you think we'll ever get married?"

Her heart skipped a few beats at the driver's words, looking as nervous as ever, but for a second... Y/N allowed herself to dream.

"If it's not you, I'll never be with anyone else, Charles Leclerc. You're it for me."

Hours have passed since one of the most breathtaking moments of her life, and there she was: scared to death about the future.

Charles was fast asleep in their room, his light snores echoing down the hall through the open door.

Y/N looked at the time - 12:05 AM.

It was midnight, and the girl just sat on the leather couch in their living room, with only silence for company.

As the girl got up to go back to her bed where her boyfriend was waiting for her, she couldn't understand how she got everything she ever dream of, but she just couldn't feel as happy as she should have.

I should not be left to my own devices

They come with prices and vices

I end up in crisis

(Tale as old as time)

For as long as she can remember, she's been that way.

She could remember the exact moment when her world changed, when her walls closed in around her, when everything she knew crashed into pieces to the ground.

For little Y/N, just an innocent child at the time, her father's sudden absence from their home seemed inexplicable. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and there was no sign of him.

With no message, no farewell, no explanation.

Just like air, he was just… gone.

The colourful house where she laughed and played with both of her parents quickly became a set of broken walls, colourless and lifeless.

Her mother had never been the same ever since, and even today the young woman cannot forget the image of the woman she loved most in her entire life, sitting on the old sofa in her childhood home, exhausted, empty, without the energy to cry anymore.

Much like she mirrored it now.

Months turned into years since her father left her but, like a ghost standing there in the room, the lingering consequences of his actions still haunted her until that day.

No matter how much therapy she got, Y/N always felt like that lonely girl who could never make friends, who sabotaged every single relationship she had.

It seemed the only permanent companion she was going to have in her life was her crushing, persistent depression.

That was until she met Charles, right at the moment she most needed a shoulder to lean on.

It was 2020 - the year her biggest dream finally came true.

Y/N was finally going to become a Formula 1 driver.

Wherever she looked as she entered the circuit for the first time, the young woman could sense the eyes fixed on her and the curiosity that revolved around her.

Y/N L/N, the first woman in the 21st century to be part of the very competitive F1 grid, the promising new rookie racing for Williams Racing.

It was a whole mix of emotions: the happiness, pride and satisfaction that the new young driver felt for fulfilling her dream couldn't help but be overshadowed by all the controversy, hatred and hostility that her entry into the sport brought with it.

'This is not a girl's sport'

'She must have slept with someone important'

'She's just a pretty face'

Y/N heard it all while trying to turn a deaf ear to all these hateful people.

The girl sat in the chair in the middle of the conference room, prepared to face the world on her first day in media, but reality quickly managed to bite back at her when one of the interviewers walked over to her, eyes wide with scorn plastered in his face.

"Question for Y/N: How does it feel to know that such a talented driver was left with no seat in the team for you to join, just because you're a woman?"

I wake up screaming from dreaming

One day, I'll watch as you're leaving

'Cause you got tired of my scheming

(For the last time)

To say the woman was taken aback was an understatement.

Her voice seemed to have disappeared and her brain to have stopped being able to form sentences as she tried to understand the complete, unfair misogyny she was suffering just for being a person trying to achieve her goals, regardless of gender.

Out of nowhere, a warm voice echoed through the room, drawing all attention to him.

"How about you stop being a complete idiot and try to do your job like a professional instead?" The brunette in red spoke, full of confidence and determination. "Y/N is here because she deserves it and because she has immense talent. No one here is going to take credit away from her just because they're a sexist pig."

Her eyes threatened tears as his met her grateful gaze.

Little did she know that the hero who stood up for her would end up being the love of her life.

Back to that day, Y/N suddenly woke up from her dream screaming, still tormented by the discrimination she had to face and still had to face until that very day.

"Hey, hey..." Charles woke up, cupping her face gently in his hands, making her look towards him as he wiped the tears that were streaming from her eyes. "Are you all right? Breathe, mon ange. It was just a dream."

"Yes, it's okay." Y/N swallowed hard, lying through her teeth. "It was just a nightmare, Charles. Don't worry."

He pulled her into his arms, hugging her tight to comfort her, but in reality, in the back of her mind, she could only think of the worst.

He deserves so much better than the mess I am. He'll get tired and just leave me one day. Like everybody else does.

It's me, hi

I'm the problem, it's me

At teatime, everybody agrees

I'll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

Until sunrise, the girl stayed awake, her mind doing what she knew how to do best: racing.

Not even the strong arms that enveloped her body, or the heat that her partner's body emitted were capable of transmitting some calm, or some security.

She was the problem.

Tired of lying in bed without any rest, Y/N gave up on being there and, exhausted, she got up, heading back to the cold living room in the centre of the apartment.

She tried everything to get her mind away from the negativity poisoning her system: reading a book, watching a movie, cooking breakfast. But all in vain.

Hours passed before she heard Charles's footsteps interrupting the silence, and soon she could see her boyfriend, shirtless, showing off his excellent physical shape, and stretching as he walked towards her.

"Good morning, mon amour." Charles said, hugging his girlfriend's body from behind and placing a soft kiss on the top of her shoulder. "Did you make breakfast? Damn, I'm lucky." He chuckled, still noticeably sleepy.

You're lucky? You deserve so much more than this, than me, her self-sabotaging thoughts returned.

"So what are we going to do today?" The man asked as he bit into the toast in his hand. "I was thinking we could have lunch at that restaurant by the marina that you love so much."

"I can't, Charles. I have to go to the team headquarters later." Falling back into her harmful tendencies, and without having the courage to look back at him, Y/N tried to keep her distance from him, using the scheduled meeting (which she didn't need to attend) as an excuse.

"Ah okay…" The Monegasque felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise, as he sensed that something wasn't right with her. "If you want to do something when you get-"

"We'll see." She interrupted, answering dryly. Y/N grabbed her things and headed towards the entrance, her eyes still unable to take in his image. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, mon ange." He agreed, trying not to pressure his girlfriend. "I love y-"

He hadn't even finished talking and she was already out the door.

Sometimes, I feel like everybody is a sexy baby

And I'm a monster on the hill

Too big to hang out, slowly lurching toward your favorite city

Pierced through the heart, but never killed

Within a few hours, Y/N arrived in Wantage, where her second home was: the elegant, welcoming HQ of Williams Racing.

Although still fragile, Y/N felt slightly more energetic and optimistic just being there, the memory of her professional success enough to give her a small boost of self-esteem.

The girl would never be able to put into words how grateful she would feel for the rest of her life for the chance the team gave her.

Entering through the large glass door, Y/N soon found Jost, her team principal, who supported her unconditionally during her two years on the team. The two quickly fell into casual conversation, rambling about the car's performance and the strategies used in previous races.

They stayed that way for a few minutes, until the voice of one of the engineers chanted through the walls of the long corridor, clearly unaware that he was being heard.

"I just don't understand what that she is fucking doing here, man. Y/N is just a little girl, we need a strong man behind that wheel."

The man quickly came face to face with the duo, fear spreading across his face: not for hurting Y/N's feelings - that he couldn't care less; but because he got caught red-handed by his superior - a man, that held the power over his job.

Jost tried to put a hand on the young woman's shoulder, but her body was already out of sight as the driver made her escape, the sound of Capito's scolding the rude man barely audible to her as she ran away from the scene.

She was the problem.

She simply would never be good enough.

Did you hear my covert narcissism

I disguise as altruism

Like some kind of congressman?

(Tale as old as time)

Unbeknownst to the girl, her teammate, Alex, couldn't help noticing her tearful figure escaping towards the garden that decorated the back of the headquarters.

Without thinking twice, the Thai hurriedly followed her, gently grabbing her wrist to stop her.

"Y/N, what's wrong?" The boy asked him, a worried look on his face.

Despite the girl being able to count on one hand the true friendships she managed to build in her entire life, Alex Albon was one of the few people she really connected with.

The genuine, loving boy felt almost like the brother she never had, protecting her with everything he had since the day she joined Williams.

Two years had passed since then and his presence in her life was now unparalleled and irreplaceable.

"Just tale as old as time." She spoke without thinking, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Forget it. It's no big deal."

Her friend put his arm around the girl's shoulders, pulling her into a comforting hug. "You know I can read you like the back of my hand, Y/N."

"It's just…" The girl sobbed, letting her cheek rest against the tall man's chest. "I'm fed up. Sometimes I just want to give up on it all, on Formula 1, on motorsports. I'm tired of feeling less than everyone else just because I'm not a man."

"Hey, look at me." Alex said, placing both of his hands on the girl's forearms. "You're here because you deserve it. You've won championships in the junior categories. You've scored a hell out of points for a driver in a car like Williams. You and I are literally the most successful duo in the team in the last decade."

The girl couldn't help but laugh softly, sniffling her nose. "When you put it that way..."

"Believe me, Y/N." Albon spoke, hugging the girl he saw as his 'little sister' again. "I'm so proud of you, Charles is so proud of you, all the drivers on the grid are. Fuck what others think."

I wake up screaming from dreaming

One day, I'll watch as you're leaving

And life will lose all its meaning

(For the last time)

To say that Alex made her feel so much better was an understatement.

Suddenly, Y/N had a pep in her step, a grin from ear to ear, a renewed energy within her and an eagerness to return home to the one she loved.

The girl couldn't help but feel guilty for the way she treated Charles that morning, so she decided to surprise him with her early return and also a small gift.

Y/N was a gift giver, especially for Charles, who always looked like a little boy on Christmas Eve every time she did so.

Charles had spent weeks and weeks drooling over a sweater from his favourite brand, helping his girlfriend choose the gift. With her headphones in her ears, the girl glided through the aisle of the store in Monte Carlo, straight to the selected piece of clothing.

As she searched for the correct size, the side of her face heated up as she felt someone's attention suddenly on her. The whispers distracted her from what she was doing and she discreetly turned down the music on her phone to listen to what the two laughing girls were saying.

"I don't know, I've heard rumours about them but I don't think so."

"I hope not, I mean, he's Charles Leclerc! He can have any girl he wants."

"You're so right. He's probably just fucking some bikini model on the low."

The sweater remained on the hanger, as Y/N left the store empty-handed.

It's me, hi

I'm the problem, it's me

At teatime, everybody agrees

I'll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

It looked like she simply couldn't catch a break that day: the world was determined to bring her down.

Opening the apartment door, Y/N entered, being immediately seen by her boyfriend who had a smile the size of the world.

"Mon amour, you're back!" He got up from his chair, nearly tripping over his own feet with the excitement that filled him. "You don't understand how happy I am to see y- What's wrong, Y/N?"

The boy was caught off guard by the discouraged, beaten-down look on his partner's face, as he expected her to come home happy to have visited the team she loved so much.

"Charles, we need to talk." She spoke, her eyes still not looking at him, similar to the morning.

"I don't like that tone. Are you going to break up with me or something?" He joked nervously, trying to break the tense atmosphere between them.

However, when he looked at her, Charles understood that this was exactly what she was thinking about.

Suddenly, the weight of the velvet box he'd been keeping in his pocket seemed to have tripled.

I have this dream my daughter-in-law kills me for the money

She thinks I left them in the will

The family gathers 'round and reads it and then someone screams out

"She's laughing up at us from Hell"

After a few agonizing seconds of silence, the young woman gathered her courage and looked at the other driver, who had a terrified look on his face.

Charles felt a multitude of emotions at once; he was scared, confused, angry, desperate.

How could she try to do that to him when he was preparing to take the next step in their relationship?

"Charles, don't look at me like that." Y/N turned her tearful gaze to the ground, not having the strength to watch the boy's heart break as hers did. "It's for the best. You deserve so much. You are the best person in this whole fucking world, and I... I'm just me: talentless, worthless me. You can do so much better than-"

"Don't even dare finish that sentence." Charles threatened, lovingly grabbing the girl's face by her jaw and forcing her to look him in the eyes. "I love you, Y/N. I love you so fucking much. I love you more than anything and anyone in this world."

The girl couldn't hold back the sob that threatened to come out of her lips, as she shook her head in opposition to the words the Monegasque was saying.

"Just stop!" The man said, his voice rising. He leaned his forehead against hers, wiping her cheeks with one of his hands. "It's you. You're it for me, remember? You told me so, and I feel the same way about you."

"There is no one else for me. No one better than you, no one who makes me feel like you do, or who I want to spend the rest of my days with." Charles continued speaking, trying to make the girl realize how much she meant to him, desperate to change her mind.

He felt her body relax slightly against his and he knew right there: it was now or never, this was the moment for his grand romantic gesture.

Guided by his impulsiveness, Charles reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out the navy blue box, setting it on the counter in front of her.

Y/N felt her breathing stop. Was that what she thought it was?

The Ferrari driver opened the small box, showing her the most perfect diamond ring inside.

"You are the love of my life, and I never doubted that for a single second. So please, make me the happiest man in the world and marry me."

It's me, hi

I'm the problem, it's me

It's me, hi

I'm the problem, it's me

It's me, hi

Everybody agrees, everybody agrees

God, she wanted to say yes.

But she couldn't. Not when he came into her life as a hero rescuing her from the world, and she...

She was just an anti-hero in his story.

Selfishly, Y/N wanted nothing more than to accept his proposal and fall into his arms.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Charles?" The girl looked at him fearfully.

"Mon amour, just say yes and end my agony once and for all." Even in a moment like that, the man still managed to find humour in the situation, letting out a small laugh and placing a tender kiss on her lips.

Both deposited all the love they felt for each other in that kiss, getting stuck in the moment as if they were the only people in the world.

"Yes." Y/N gave in, opening her eyes surprised when she realized that word had slipped out of her mouth without her even realizing it.

Charles smiled at her, picked her up from the floor and kissed her. And he kissed her again, and again, his lips just couldn't stay away from hers. "Yes, Charles. Yes. Yes!" She repeated, gradually becoming more and more confident.

With tears in both of their eyes and a shiny new ring around her finger, she looked at the man in front of her: a man who loved her unconditionally with all her flaws, all her struggles, and all her past.

Right then and there, Y/N knew that Charles was her true home, and she could only belong in his arms.

Maybe things weren't falling apart.

Maybe things were starting to fall into the exact places where they needed to.

It's me, hi

I'm the problem, it's me

At teatime, everybody agrees

I'll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

taglist: @dan3avocado @starxqt @roseinnej @spiidergirlsworld @ccloaned @hotpigeon22 @dr3lover @lovelytsunoda @primadonnasdream @luxebeautystyle @wallfloweriism @ilivefortheleague @gwynethhberdara @satellitelh @adavenus @audreyscodes @wifeoflucyboynton @th6ccnsp6cyy @classifiedsblog @flyingmushroomss @motylekrozi @claramllera @gabrielamaex @handsupforamiracle @pierre-gasssllyy @lorenaloveslewis

@idkiwantchocolatee @simpforsunwoo @kissatelier @xweirdxsceletton @micksmidnights @miniminescapist @inchidentwithmax @hopelesslyromantics-world @alwaysclassyeagle @indieclarke @capela-miranda @okokoksblog-blog @pulpfixion @sins-only33 @sainzclerc @allisonxf1 @honethatty12

@amsofftrack @flannel-cures @junkiespromise @loudoperahumanoidpanda @honeyric3 @holy-macncheese-balls @ricciardosheart @pierreverstapkin @ravenqueen27 @majkaftorek @home-of-disaster @buendiabebeta @itgirlofnowhere @roses-of-eden @thewintersunset @rubychocolatechips

(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

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whatwouldsylwrite · 1 year

Text

At least I got you in my head (2.5)

(2)

Summary: Abby is straight. And then you move in with her.

Tags: modern au, fem!reader, straight!abby (she is doing some comphet bullshit), pining, idiot in love and it's abby, reader is gay and tired.

Notes: small blurb, mostly about your suffering in the morning. Also, I strongly believe Abby smells like Dirty from Lush either because she uses it herself or it's just how it is, but yeah. Spearmint and sandalwood and lavender. There, I said it.

tags: @abbyily

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

You woke up thirsty and disoriented, but the warm hands around you quickly brought you up to speed. You came to Abby last night and asked for cuddles, right. Fuck, you felt so lonely in your cold bed yesterday it made you too emotional, and you decided it would be an excellent idea to go and cuddle the girl you had no chance with. God you hoped you didn't make Abby uncomfortable.

You were lying on your sides, facing each other, and Abby's hand was probably cramping now,but she didn't seem to mind. You sighed quietly and looked up to Abby, who was still sleeping peacefully. She was so fucking pretty you wanted to bash your head on the wall from what her adorable freckles and long lashes did to you. Her hair was a little out of place, and she looked so innocent, like a child. You wanted to smother her with silly little kisses you saved for kids when you could make extra money babysitting.

You looked down at Abby's collar and froze, confused. She was wearing your t-shirt. It made you feel hot all over, and you remembered you had her t-shirt on because you were stupid yesterday and fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Abby liked men, and you weren't one, and you should have worked harder on getting over her because this was getting ridiculous. You both just mixed your t-shirts, no big deal and no, heart, we were not making a big deal out of it.

You inhaled Abby's scent, feeling like a thief - this spearmint and sandalwood wasn't for you, but Abby smelled so good you couldn't resist and smell more. You buried your nose back in her neck and relaxed, slowly falling asleep again.

Next time you woke up three hours later, but this time you were hugging Abby from behind, your nose deep in her hair. Yeah, something was definitely wrong with you, wasn't it? You carefully moved away, scared of waking Abby up and facing whatever the fuck this situation was, but she didn't notice and you escaped her bedroom as quietly as possible, closing the door behind you.

You let out a relieved sigh and walked to the bathroom to brush your teeth and wash your face which was a little bit puffy from hangover and oversleeping. It was currently almost 2 pm, meaning you already lost the whole day, because even if you didn't feel physically bad, you just wanted to lie in your bed and do nothing.

Maybe eat some junk food, actually. That would be the best.

You knew you should've changed and not continue wearing Abby's t-shirt that smelled like her, but you were weak, so you left it on. You'd put it in the laundry bin in the evening.

You were staring mindlessly into your cup when Abby shuffled to the kitchen, her hair a mess, her forearms making you weak in your knees. Damn good forearms.

"Morning." Abby yawned. "How are you feeling?"

"It's 2 pm." You laughed. "I'm as good as one can be on a hangover. You?"

"Don't want to do anything."

"Then don't. You want tea?"

"Can you make coffee?"

"Yeah."

Abby went to the bathroom and you started brewing coffee for her - she was a huge coffee drinker, but when you asked if she wanted to drink tea with you, she always said yes. Abby was sweet like that.

You smiled to yourself and poured the coffee into her cup, adding three spoons of sugar and milk to it. The sweet tooth this girl had made your teeth ache from a possible cavity.

Abby came back, still in your t-shirt, and sat on the chair, hugging her cup like it was a life-saver. She looked just as sleepy as you felt.

"Why did Cait text me that she is home?" You asked, puzzled. Notification was from 7 am.

"I told them to text us when they get home." Abby murmured in her coffee. "You don't do that?"

"I do, Cait just doesn't listen. She has this "if something happens to me you'll find out from the news" attitude." You sighed and leaned back on your chair. "I guess she wanted to be polite this time."

"Caitlyn is very cool." Abby said carefully as if she could say the wrong thing about your best friend.

"She is." You smiled. "Ellie is very different from when I met her, though."

Oh shit.

Abby looked up and you couldn't help but feel caught, as if you just accidentally admitted you cheated on Abby.

"Wait a second." Abby grinned like she knew where this was going. "You hooked up, didn't you?"

"That's a bold assumption, but yes." You grinned in return. "It was a long time ago. I didn't think that your Ellie was my Ellie."

"'My Ellie'?" Abby teased and you felt your face heat up from embarrassment. "Do you have a crush on her?"

"Oh, I've been harbouring feelings for her for half a year." You said dramatically. "Stalking her schedule, screenshotting her Instagram, moving in with her best friend…"

Abby laughed and you laughed too.

"It sounded so fucking creepy."

You nodded and finished your tea.

"I want to order some food and watch a tv-show. What do you think?"

"If I liked girls I would've definitely married you right now." Oh god not this kind of straight shit, no. Nononono. Did the universe hate you? "Really, if you dare to ditch me for your sweetheart I'll cause a scene."

"I'd make a perfect housewife." You smirked. “You can marry me just for that.”

"I always wanted a spring wedding." Abby sighed dreamingly and you laughed.

"Just say the word, babygirl." You winked and Abby laughed, but she got shy from your words and there was pink blush on her cheekbones. Shit she was cute. Not even her "5.11 built like a tank MMA fighter" appearance could hide her soft side and you just lived for it.

You enjoyed when she got all commanding and confident and even scary, because she was so fucking hot in these moments, but when she got soft and shy ohh. It was making you insane.

You both spent 10 minutes deciding what you wanted to order, and after you finally placed the order, you moved to the living room. Abby opened her arms for you, silently inviting you to cuddle, and you couldn't resist, so you lay down on her shoulder while her strong arm went around your waist, keeping you close.

"You're breaking my little gay heart." You complained, and Abby laughed.

"I'm very sorry." She said dramatically, and her warm hand was going up and down on your arm, comforting you. "My sincere apologies to the lesbian community for being straight."

You poked her in the side and she laughed again.

Abby looked at the crown of your head and she suddenly got the overwhelming desire to place a kiss there, but she stopped herself. She felt like she was toeing a line she didn't want to cross - she didn't want to be weird. She didn't want to make you feel awkward and not cuddle with her after.

You were still in her t-shirt and Abby had The Feeling again, and she tried to give it a name, but she couldn't remember when she ever felt like that - even when Ellie wore her clothes she didn't get that feeling, but it was quite.. familiar. When Ellie wore her clothes she liked knowing that yes, Ellie was her friend, she had this privilege to be friends with her. So it was probably the same with you. Maybe it was stronger because you were not a gremlin like Ellie and actually a nice person.

Abby felt all warm and fuzzy when you laughed, vibrations going through her chest. It was a nice quiet sound and your breath was getting a little deeper and heavier.

"Falling asleep?" Abby murmured, suddenly filled with affection.

"A little."

"I can wake you up when food comes."

"Nah. We will eat and then I'll nap."

Abby chuckled, not really believing you'd last long enough, and she was right: you fell asleep anyway. But she fell asleep as well, holding you close even unconscious, maybe even closer as her mind loosened the leash on her constant questioning if it was okay for friends to feel like this.

#abby anderson x reader #abby anderson x you #abby anderson #abby tlou #aligyimh

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artandshid · 7 months

Note

Eddie munson crop top... . .. I'm feral for it like foaming out the mouth, please. Maybe the reader sees Eddie at school with a cropped hellfire shirt because it shrunk in the wash. She's in hellfire club but can't focus on anything but Eddie at school. So he asks what's up and she gets all flustered or something like that .

*Hi I changed the context of the crop top a little bitch but I still hope you like it*

WARNING: SMUT

You saw your boyfriend before he saw you. He was at his locker putting some books away. It may have seemed silly a few months ago, Eddie Munson with textbooks, yea right, but when you guys started dating, he was motivated to take his education seriously. He wanted to graduate with his girl.

He looks beautiful as always, his hair sitting in sloppy curls that fit him just perfectly, his eyebrows slightly pinched in concentration, he probably didn’t even realize he was doing it, and his soft lips slightly parted. He is so handsome and he doesn’t even know.

But what really caught your attention today, wasn’t your boyfriend’s usual, beautiful features, no it was the shirt he was wearing.

At first you didn’t even notice it, but once you realize, you thought you were for sure drooling.

He was dressed in, what looked like, to be your Hellfire Tshirt. And since it was yours, well, it didn’t exactly fit him right. It was two sizes too small for him and it was obvious. The shirt was too tight, it was hugging his muscular chest so perfectly you can see the outline of his pecs. And it was tight around the arms, too, so you his muscular biceps were being shown off to anyone who paid attention. And whoever wasn’t paying attention was missing quite the show in your opinion. But no, what really did it for you was the length of the shirt. It was short. So short that you can see his semi-toned stomach and his happy trail. God it turned you on so much.

“He probably doesn’t even know what he’s doing” you think and shake your head.

Finally he notices you and gives you a bright wide smile and kisses you on the forehead.

“There’s my girl, how are you today lovely?” He asks sincerely. Looking right into your eyes.

That’s something you love so dearly about him, he always means his questions. He doesn’t ask for the pleasantries, he asks because he truly fucking cares.

But right now, you’re so focused on his attire that you can hardly formulate thoughts, let alone words.

“M-my morning was g-great, how was yours babe?” You ask stuttering and looking at the ground, knowing that you’re getting more turned on by the second and knowing you can’t do anything because you’re at school.

He looks at you strangely because of your response, but chooses to ignore it right now. “My morning was hectic, I woke up late and only had about 10 minutes to get ready for school, I had to choose between eating or brushing my teeth, and I think you’ll be glad to know that I chose to brush my teeth,” He teases with fake pride, “Oh! I also completely wore the wrong shirt, as I’m sure you’ve already noticed, which I appreciate you not saying anything, I’m a wee bit embarrassed by it, but I thought it was mine, but it’s obviously yours, by the time I realized it was too late for me to change.” He says, but then he takes noticed if your flushed cheeks and dilated pupils and he thinks he knows why.

“Y-yeah I noticed, I think you totally r-rock it though.” Y/n says, but Eddie heard her trail off at the end and he smirks to himself. He knew when his girl was turned on, and his girl was soaking through her panties right now, he could practically smell it.

He decided to mess around with her a little bit, knowing that he has the upper hand, which doesn’t usually happen, especially when you have a girlfriend as hot as y/n, usually he’s the one that’s a flustered mess.

“Are you okay love? You’re acting a little goofy.” He says as he trails his finger tips up her side, to her forehead, feigning ignorance as he tries to play it off as checking her temperature. He hears her breath hitch.

“E-eddie, I’m fine, we should hurry though, I-I don’t wanna be late for class.” Y/n says still not making direct eye contact with him.

“I really don’t think you should go, you’re acting strange, how about this, we skip first period and come back for the second class, since we have it together anyways.” He says.

“Where will we go Eddie?” He doesn’t miss that tone in her voice. He doesn’t even think she realizes she has that seductive tone, too horny to control it. It’s also the first time she makes eye contact with him today and he didn’t realize how dark her normally blue iris’s were. God he can’t wait to have her alone.

“Let’s go out in my van and just talk. Have an easy morning.” He says and he can practically see the gears going in her head, knowing that she will finally get some relief.

——————————————————————

They’re out and in the van and Eddie says, “What’s got you so flustered today?” Looking deep in her eyes and tracing hearts around her arm.

Finally in their own private space, Y/n is able to gather her thoughts. “Eddie, that shirt is so fucking hot, you don’t even have a clue do you.”

He smirks at her. “Well I didn’t until you were tumbling over your words and blushing at the mention of my attire.”

She scoffs, “Oh so this whole skipping first period was just a ploy to get me out here in the van.” She bites her lip and Eddie can already feel himself getting hard.

“Don’t act like you didn’t need this baby.” He says and leans in for a kiss which she happily returns.

It gets heated quickly and his tongue is down her throat within seconds.

Y/n quickly maneuvers herself to get on Eddie’s lap, as she’s grinding on his dick, she can feel him getting hard, both of their jeans getting in the way of the friction they’re both now craving.

Eddie moans in her mouth at the movement and she pulls away slightly, “Eddie we should move to the back.”

Eddie starts kissing down her neck. “Why what do we need the extra space for?” He says cockily.

She doesn’t have it in her to play his game, she just knows how badly she needs him right now, “Eddie, please.”

He smirks and a few moments later they find themselves in the back of the van, resuming their previous position.

Y/n pulls her lips from Eddie’s mouth to kiss and suck along his collar bone.

Eddie’s a moaning and panting mess, he’s at full mass right now and his jeans have never been more uncomfortable.

“Oh fuck, y/n baby, I need you so bad.” He moans out loud, and my god his moans are so pretty.

“Oh no, you tricked me out here, at least let me have my fun.” And he’s once again a whimpering mess.

She continues to grind against his dick and finally, she starts kissing at the hem of the shirt. Right where his stomach begins to poke out. He could feel her leaving hickies that will for sure be showing by the time they get back into the school.

She looks up at him just as she pokes her tongue out to lick at the start of his happy trail.

Seeing her like this makes him crazy and he thinks he might cum right in his pants.

He moans again, “Jesus fuck y/n” He moans out as he grabs her hair into a makeshift pony tail. “You’re so fucking good to me baby, so pretty when you’re like this, fuck” He moans out again.

Y/n let’s out a slight chuckle of triumph and begins unbuttoning his jeans. She does it so agonizingly slow.

She slips his jeans off of him and goes back up to his boxer covered dick, which is now standing at full height. She sees the wet spot on his boxers from the precum and she lets out a slight moan, one that does not go missed by Eddie.

She palms his dick though his underwear, “All of this for me? Fuck Eddie, you’re too good to me too.” She says as she kisses his tip through his boxers and Eddie’s hips jolt upward.

He’s a moaning mess, and y/n is positive that she could see a tear forming in his eyes, “Y/n baby please, i’m begging you. I need you to take me.”

“You want me to take you? In my mouth? Right now?” She says mockingly.

He sobs out, “y/n please.” He says and he reaches for the hem of his shirt to take it off, he was so turned on he felt like it was suffocating him.

But y/n stopped him before he could go any further, “leave the shirt on Eddie.” She says seriously, still palming him. He simply nods his head and looks into her, now black with lust eyes.

Within the next few moments, y/n was able to successfully removes his boxers and was now taking Eddie’s thick long cock in her mouth.

He sits up to watch because he loves seeing her like this, he grabs a handful of her hair and ruts up into her mouth, “oh fuck yeah hun, just like that, God you take me so fucking good.”

y/n moans around his dick and looks up at him through her thick eyelashes. Even with her mouth full of his veiny cock, he’s sure he can see a slight smirk on her face.

He jolts up again and she gags when his dick hits the back of her mouth. The blowjob is sloppy and she has spit spilling out on both sides of her mouth.

Eddie’s not sure how much longer he can last, so he quickly pulls her head off and flips her around so that she’s laying down in the back of his van.

He looks down at her and smirks, she’s a heaving, sweaty mess. And he can’t wait to get inside of her.

He takes off her shirt and kisses the top of both her boobs that were still covered in her lacy black bra. He loves the bra and the contrast of the color against her skin so it stays on, at least for today.

He kisses down her stomach similar to how she did to him before and traces his finger tips along her sides, giving her goosebumps.

She wriths beneath him and he’s not sure how much more she can take before she starts begging for it, but if he’s being completely honest, he wants her to beg for it.

He unbuttons her jeans and slips them down and he can see the wet patch in her pink panties.

“Jesus H. Christ, this wet over a shirt?” He says condescendingly at he blows on her covered pussy.

“No, I’m this wet over my extremely sexy boyfriend in said shirt.” She says smartly.

He chuckles and placed a kiss on her stomach. No matter how horny, give her the opportunity and she’ll be a smart ass.

He pulls her underwear down to reveal her pink, wet cunt and he licks his lips.

“So fucking beautiful” He says and traces his tongue up her slit.

She lets out the most pornographic moan that only encourages Eddie further.

He sucks on her clit and laps at her wetness until she is a moaning mess.

However, he wants her to beg for his cock. He wants her to prove how horny she really is for his crop top.

He shoves two fingers into her cunt and starts nipping and licking at her inner thighs. “Tell me what you need baby” He eggs her on.

She moans beneath him and juts up into his fingers.

“You have to use your words honey.” He says with a smirk and looks up at her.

She lets out a frustrated groan, but finally gives into his game, “Eddie I need your cock so fucking bad, please”

He shifts her around on her hand and knees, both of their favorite position, and he shoves his dick deep inside of her tight cunt.

They both let out a moan at the feeling, she could feel him hitting the spots that she needed him to and he could feeling her tightness ready to milk him at any second.

He’s pounding into her from the back with both hands gripping her ass and they’re both a moaning mess.

He could feel his orgasm approaching when she says, “Let me get on top, I wanna fuck you while watching you wear my shirt.”

He thinks he can cum right now if she asked, but eventually they maneuver until she’s on top and he’s looking up at his goddess of a girlfriend.

Her strong thighs are allowing her to move roughly and quickly on his dick and he watches as her tits bounce in her bra and her head is thrown back in pleasure.

He reaches up to cup her boobs and he thrusts his hips to match her pace, making their fucking harder and rougher.

“Oh fuck baby, you ride my cock so fucking good, you’re such a fucking good girl.” She moans out at this dirty talk and he knows that she’s close, so he keeps egging her on.

“Keep going baby, just like that, fucking princess, taking my cock so good in your tight little cunt. You fucking love every second of this. You know what you do to me.” He pulls her bra down so that her nipples are released and he pinched them roughly.

Apparently this is all it took for her cum, because next thing he knows she’s a moaning mess on top of him and he can see her juices flowing out around his cock.

The erotic image of his girlfriend orgasming is enough to send him over the edge and the next thing he knows is that he’s gripping his girlfriend roughly by the hips and fucking hard into her.

He moans out as he shoots his first cum rope into her pussy, but she hops off and finishes him off with her hands.

He watches as the last three ropes shoots up onto y/n’s stomach. It gets all over her hands and some even makes it in her face.

“Oh holy fuck, baby that was the biggest orgasm you ever had.” She says to him with a giggle as she starts playing with the cum in her hand. He moans at the sight of his girlfriend doing this, but he wants to see something else.

“Show me your cunt.” He says out of breath and she sits back and spreads her legs, where he can see her pink pussy glistening with both of their cum.

“Fuck you’re so fucking sexy y/n” He says as he leans forward to kiss her and lick away whatever cum got on her face.

She giggles at the feeling and kisses him back.

“I love you much y/n.” Eddie’s says sincerely.

“I love you, too Eddie, you should wear my shirts more often.” She replies out of breath and they both laugh.

“Where’s that blanket, we need to get cleaned up and get to class.” Y/n says and Eddie rolls his eyes playfully.

“Whatever you say princess.” He says with a wink

———————

They walk back into the school together, hand-in-hand. Just in time for their second period class with Mr. Jameson.

Unfortunately still, Eddie doesn’t have another shirt to wear, and now he has hickies scattered all around his torso, so more people were talking now than they were before, but funnily enough Eddie wasn’t so embarrassed of the shirt anymore.

As they walk into the classroom, Mr. Jameson, looks Eddie up and down in disgust while their classmates talked in whispers behind their hands.

“Mr. Munson, don’t you think your attire today is highly inappropriate?” Mr. Jameson asks.

“My girl doesn’t think so.” Eddie says with a smirk.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie x reader #stranger things #eddie munson smut #perv!eddie

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scopophobia-polaris · 8 months

Text

Good evening friends. Instead of trying to draw I woke up in a frenzy like no other.

So the zelda series has a bit of a history of like...changing a line and then suddenly the context for the whole story is like.....changed and shit (ie. SkSw and Totk) but there is an extremely funny one in the oot manga that I see brought up on occasion but without knowing that the English translation for atleast this ONE LINE changed a lot of the context later on.

So, this page

And the funniest line in the entire world

Sorry for the quality jump

"Royal hylian blood flows through your veins, just like Princess Zelda" now....we can all sit here and agree the wording of that is a little....🤨

fun news, that may have been a translation error

So I had to go find myself a GLIMPSE of the original because apprently no one wants to put it online

So the line "ゼルダ姫と同じ血を引くハイアン人なのだ" roughly translates to something like you share the same blood as princess zelda, and it seems like fan translators before the official translation picked up on that fairly well writing " you are a Hylian just like Princess Zelda"

( silly news both a machine translation and my friend @nxntendo translated the line with Link having femme pronouns so

Do with that what you will)

Now I was trying to discuss this with said friend and we can't figure out where they got the you are royal just like zelda line, I got my theories it probably has to do with Link's dad being a knight or even their mother being a noblewoman? Possibly, so it was like let's emphasize that, and said that Link is royal, like zelda.

But its most likely a mistranslation of sharing blood, instead of the way that everyone else was reading it (both of you are hylians) because the whole thing is revealing Link is you know...not kokiri and the best way to impart that to them is hey you are a hylian like this person you know and care about (in the context of the manga Link has the closest relationship to Zelda through the whole manga and it's implied that they both have romantic feelings? For eachother idk idk he was a boy she was a girl it's that kind of shit.)

So the official translation comes around and I guess whoever did it just didn't take the context for what it's probably written for and Fuckin uhhhh they're related it says they share blood so they're related and it's so funny because this is THE ONLY PLACE WHERE THE ENGLISH TRANSLATION READS LIKE THAT.

Now I would wanna know what the manga says in different languages tbh because this is so insanely funny to me to see if anyone else translated it like that but it stands to say, this one line makes everything in rest of the manga and the Twilight princess manga really uh....

Really fuckin uh 🫢

#help me god this is so funny #im sorey to the person who was reading the manga and was like i could use this for lu headcanons you make them headcanons #i just couldnt stop laughong about this WHOLE PAGE #the legend of zelda #ocarina of time #oot link

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magicalbats · 6 months

Note

I DID SEE NEUVILETTES SAD FACE… they are making it so easy for us

also I am CERTAIN Father could handle two brats at once, just as well as mr neuvillette could. both of those thoughts make me feel INSANE. I don’t know what I like more, two unruly brats being put in place or… (bear with me, I just woke up and how do words) furina, the brat of brats, being made to show some appreciation and care and service to her loyal and long suffering little handmaiden, who is very good at following orders but has a hard time relaxing and letting others take care of her. smthin abt a dom handling two different types of sub at the same time, playing off of each other, just… iujghgffghyfg

— dinner guest

Oh, dinner guest anon

I love that idea. Like actually

I’m envisioning something that looks and feels outwardly soft, but with a hard underline just below the surface. The way we’ve seen Arlecchino speak and behave so far has been like that; very well mannered, even cordial, with a razors edge to it that adds a certain weight to her actions. I see her domination being both subtle and heavy handed at the same time. Something like …

“Isn’t it interesting, Lady Furina, that you have the privilege of a life of luxury and indulgence while your people are forced to make do with whatever they can eke out for themselves? They cannot lay claim to the same lavish comforts you enjoy on a daily basis,” Arlecchino drags her pointed gaze to the nervous handmaid standing just behind the Hydro Archon. “Does that seem fair to you?”

It takes you a beat to realize she’d asked that question of you and not your lady. Eyes going round, you look to Furina for guidance just as she turns on the chaise lounge to peer back at you as well. Twin expressions of surprise and confusion, and maybe just a little bit of fear are exchanged before she forces out a thin, tittering laugh.

“Oh, don’t be silly! Of course I treat my loyal attendants to many of the same indulgences I myself enjoy. Why, just the other day we had a tea party together, didn’t we? I even made sure we had the most exquisite cake to share between ourselves to mark the occasion and - -“

“Is that all it takes?” Arlecchino cuts across her, sharp as a knife. “A little bit of cake to sweeten the deal of servitude? Is this truly the only way you know how to show appreciation to others, Lady Furina?”

The Archon hesitates at that.

You anxiously shift behind her, unsure of what to say or do in this situation. Oh, how you wished Monsieur Neuvillette had been able to attend this appointment with the Snezhnayan diplomat. It was resoundingly obvious that you were in over your head and woefully ill prepared to handle it by yourself.

“I — I’m not sure what you mean,” Furina finally manages to squeak out, visibly fidgeting now. “What else would you have me do if not share my luxuries with those who have earned it? I am not a cruel or unjust god, I’ll have you know!”

Arlecchino puts her head to one side as if she’d just heard something rather interesting but her expression doesn’t change or give anything away. “You’re right. Neither of those words describe you, do they? I think what I would call it is selfish.”

Furina jolts as if she’d been physically struck, and you quickly step forward to intervene.

“Lady Arlecchino, please cease this at once! My lady does not deserve to - -“

The Knave stops you short with a slicing look that makes your breath catch.

“Oh, but she does. Even as the ruler of this nation does that really give her the right to ignore the cries and needs of the people? You, for example,”

Sedately, Arlecchino uncrosses her legs and stands.

You shake at her casual approach, those wicked heels near silent on the plush carpet laid out under the tea table as she steps around it. She comes close enough for you to feel the body heat coming off her and it makes you loose a small gasp when the taller woman brushes around you. A clawed hand finds your arm, horrible and monstrous in the way it softly smooths up to your shoulder and then across your collar. You think to pull away. To run and find Monsieur Neuvillette so he can take care of this problem which you are so clearly unqualified to do, but your feet seem to be frozen to the spot.

Without a word, Arlecchino presses herself against your back, hard and unrelenting, at the same time her fingers close tight around your breast. You gasp, and the sound is echoed by the Hydro Archon watching on from the lounge in fascinated silence.

“You, such a lovely little pet,” She croons into your ear, all silk and jagged edges that would cut you if you weren’t careful. “Surely there is more you want from life than to serve and eat cake? Wouldn’t it be nice if Lady Furina showed you some of the same consideration you give her all the time? I certainly hope you don’t think that you’re undeserving of even the most basic respect …”

“… Lady Arlecchino, please.”

“Call me Father.” She gives your tit a slow, savory squeeze that stops just short of pain. “I’m more accustomed to being referred to like that anyway, but I can see that my guidance is needed even here in the courts of Fontaine as it is anywhere else.”

Finally stirring out of her stupor, Furina starts to stand. “Now hold on a minute here! I’d kindly ask you to refrain from touching my - - eeek!“

She falls back with a rather inelegant squawk of surprise when Arlecchino shoves her back down. You draw a sharp inhale, thinking you’ll scream for help, but before you can follow through on it she roughly spins you around and tosses you across the lounge next to your lady. Terror makes it difficult to breathe as you blindly reach over to grasp Furina’s trembling hand, and the two of you huddle there together on the lush cushions when Arlecchino comes to loom over you both.

“How cute. Loyal to your god even now, even after everything I’ve said. No matter, though.” Drawing a perfectly calm breath, she bends at the waist and reaches for you. Two sets of frightened whimpers rise up on the couch but, to your gaping surprise, all she does is brush your rumpled skirt higher. “I’m going to give you and Lady Furina here a little lesson in showing one’s appreciation, and I do hope you’ll pay attention. There is so much more she could be doing for you in exchange for that loyalty she speaks so highly of.”

Beside you, Furina offers up a threadbare laugh. “Is this really necessary, miss, uh, Knave? I - I mean, this seems a bit … inappropriate.”

You couldn’t have agreed more, especially when she gets your skirt hiked up enough to expose your panties to the room. Your face burns in shame and embarrassment alike, but Arlecchino’s lack of concern is obvious. Slipping those long, sharp nails into the waistband, she starts to tug your underwear down your thighs.

“W - wait —“

“Do not fret, little maid. No harm will come to you or your precious god, I give you my word on that. This is but an exercise in humility and penance.”

Ignoring the way you twist and try to squeeze your thighs together, she gets your panties pulled down around your ankles where she stops long enough to pull one foot through. She doesn’t bother with the other, however, and just leaves your underwear dangling there as she then reaches for Furina.

Her fingers clutch your hand tight enough to hurt but there’s nothing you can do to stop it when Arlecchino grabs her by the back of the hair and drags her off the couch. The Archon yelps and sputters as she’s forced to her feet only for the taller woman to shove her down on the floor in the next moment.

“Ow! Please wait, I don’t understand - -“

“And that’s the heart of the problem, isn’t it?” Arlecchino purrs, twisting the handful of hair she’s gripping to make Furina let out a strangled shriek. It’s not enough to alert anyone though. You know you should be screaming at the top of your lungs but you can’t seem to pull in enough air to accomplish that, and you just stare up at her in petrified disbelief. “I’m going to teach you a much more appropriate method of giving your thanks to those who serve you so diligently. You want to be a good Archon, don’t you?”

Furina sucks in a wet, faltering gasp. “Yes, of course I do, but …”

“Then allow me to show you how best you can serve your people.”

Viciously, Arlecchino shoves her face between your legs, and you nearly jolt right up off the couch. Furina wails and struggles, but The Knave is as demanding as she is unrelenting. She forces her warbling mouth right up against your bare cunt, making you lurch at the sensation. Your legs frantically kick out as you try to shove yourself as far into the backrest as you can go, trying to escape, but Arlecchino just grabs you by the hair with her unoccupied hand. The pain that tears through your scalp is immediate and debilitating, and all you can do is seethe while she holds the two of you there as if without any effort at all to show for it.

“Now, Lady Furina,” She intones over the chorus of breathless gasps and whining mewls. “I want you to put that mouth of yours to good use. Show her just how much you really appreciate all her hard work.”

The shuddering Archon keens a faltering sound, and the resulting puff of hot hair on your cunt has you shaking like a leaf. You sway, unsteady and reeling, but Arlecchino’s hold on you is as good as iron. It must be the same for Furina because she hesitantly mouths at you in some parody of a kiss, evidently not seeing that she had any other choice but to comply. It’s not good enough for the other woman though and she meanly grinds her face down into your pussy, practically suffocating her in the process.

“I know you can do better than that. Be a good girl for me and open your mouth. Use your tongue.”

You shoot Arlecchino a tearful look, but all of her attention is on the other woman kneeling between your thighs. It’s clear she was just using you as a prop to further humiliate and debase Furina, and she didn’t actually care about you or any pleasure you might derive from this. It was just a means to an end, and you hiss when you feel a hesitant tongue slip out to nudge at you.

Noising a muffled sound that echoes your own little squeak, Furina shyly licks over your soft creases and folds without any real intent behind it. You feel as equally humiliated by this as she does but you still shudder when she accidentally brushes your clit. Arlecchino only clicks her tongue though, using her hold on Furina’s hair to forcefully guide and drag her mouth back and forth over the apex of your slit.

“Like this. You want her to feel good, don’t you? I wouldn’t have expected you to not even know this much …”

You finally manage to pull in a halting, paper thin breath. “Lady Arle — Father, please stop this at once. There is no justification for treating Lady Furina this way … if the honorable Iudex learns of this - -“

“Oh?” Her unsettling gaze at last comes up to fix on you again. “Are you going to tell him, little maid? You don’t look like you’d have the courage, but perhaps I underestimated you.”

A blubbering whimper rips out of your throat when she leans over you, getting close to your face while Furina heaves against your cunt. Trying to lean away from her just gets your hair pulled again, and Arlecchino tugs you right back around to look at her.

“I asked you a question. Is it not customary to give an answer when someone is speaking to you? I’ll ask again: are you going to inform the Chief Justice of what took place here today?”

You screw your eyes shut. The threat in her voice was not near subtle enough for you to miss it, and you were under no illusion of guaranteed safety just because of your close proximity to the Archon of Fontaine. “N - … no, Father. I won’t tell him.”

“That’s what I thought.” Retreating back into her own space, Arlecchino sends a slow look of consideration over Furina who’s nose is so deeply buried in your pudgy mound that all you can see of her are her pretty mismatched eyes. They’re big and fearful, no doubt mirroring yours, and she issues a soft, muffled yelp at suddenly having The Knave’s attention on her again. “And you, Lady Furina … will you go running to your precious Iudex after I’m finished with you here?”

She hesitates, furiously trying to blink away the glisten of moisture filming her eyes as she pulls in a thickly labored breath. A muffled noise that might have been a ‘no’ rises between your legs, making you twitch only to full on shudder just a heartbeat later when she shakes her head as well.

Evidently pleased, Arlecchino eases up her hold on you before letting her hand slip away entirely. “Good. That’s what I like to hear. Then what I want the two of you to do is relax. Just enjoy yourselves for a little while. I’d say both of you have earned your respective roles here.”

She releases Furina too, much to your reeling surprise, but both of you are much too frightened to move. The usually boisterous and flamboyant Archon obediently stays kneeling on the floor while the unnervingly collected woman steps around the lounge to loom over you from behind. Your skin crawls at her nearly palpable presence at your back. So heavy and oppressive it’s all you can do just to keep breathing when she casually reaches over your shoulders to smooth her hands down the front of your uniform.

“I’ll be here to instruct you the whole time and ensure each of you does as she is supposed to. As long as you remember your place I won’t have any reason to correct you.” She sighs, almost distant and dreamy, and you numbly peer down at yourself to watch those horrible hands drag over your breasts.

Abruptly, Arlecchino pinches the front of your shirt and pops it open with a sharp tug. You jerk slightly at the force, mewling softly when buttons go flying to clatter across the marble floor some yards away. She sets her sights on your brassier next and the way she tears into it is almost violent, cotton digging into you mercilessly as she shreds it to pieces. A fresh surge of withering shame has your cheeks burning hot when your bare tits hit the air and humiliatingly stiffened nipples cut up off your body in attention seeking points. You aren’t the least bit surprised when Arlecchino latches onto them with thumb and forefinger, rather indelicately pinching the tightly coiled buds, but it still startles a wounded sound out of you all the same.

“Now,” She intones, ignoring your hissed pleas in favor of looking down at Furina’s teary eyed face. “You’d better get to work, God of Justice. This little one seems so sensitive and tender … you don’t want to disappoint her, do you?”

With a quiet sniffle, she hesitantly opens her mouth a bit more and drags her wet tongue through your cunt purposefully now. She seemed about as ready to have this done and over with as you were, and you fitfully arch when she finds your clit. Settling in now that she’s located the spot that makes you twitch, Furina nuzzles her face into you while she submissively laps at the sensitive nerve cluster. Between that and Arlecchino’s demanding ministrations on your aching teats, it doesn’t take long to have you gasping in reluctant pleasure and actively hating your body for turning on you so quickly. So readily.

You almost couldn’t believe how unbearably wet you were getting from this …

The Knave is nothing but pleased though, and she hums a satisfied sound as she gives your nipples a pointed tug to leave you keening. “Isn’t this a lovely sight to see. You look rather good on your knees, Lady Furina … I do hope you’re enjoying the taste of your little handmaid. The next time you feel so inclined to invite me to one of your gracious tea parties I simply must remember to bring some of my favorite toys for us to play with. In fact, I believe I already have one in mind for the two of you.”

⭐️

#arlecchino x reader #furina x reader #self insert bullshit #something short and silly

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cherry1sblog · 10 months

Text

PAIRING:Lee heeseung x fem!reader

GENRES:smut,fluff,bullying,alcohol,party,unprotected sex (rember to wrap your Willy so the out come won’t be silly🌝)

WARNINGS there is bullying in this heeseung is basically a dick to y/n and nothing in this story is real!!! This is fan fiction and the way I write about heeseung is not the way I portray him as he’s a person himself this is simply for entertainment only !!

SUMMARY:heeseung had always bullied you through your 3 years of Highschool but never let anyone touch you other then him and if he found out someone did that was the end of it you were basically marked as his toy that’s until the summer of your junior year you had enough you were done with him always making fun of you and you hated the fact that after all he did I to you you still adored him and liked him but it dosent matter cause you wanted to leave your senior year with a banger so you were no longer your nerdy self still smart asf obvi but appearance wise different you got contacts new clothes thank god you guys didn’t have a dress code and most importantly you spent all summer learning how to do your makeup……

(Word count :………)

//FIRST DAY OF SENIOR YEAR\\

You woke up that day at 4 in the morning all tho school didn’t start till 7:40 you had 3 hours to get ready for you first last day of senior year you showers blow dried your hair styled it put in your contacts and lastly did you makeup you were ready to go feeling a bit scared slightly pulling your skirt up more revealing more of your thighs but you didn’t care you were going to do this no matter what and no one can stop you not even Lee heeseung

Walking into school heads turning new faces old faces appearing but everyone seemed to stair at you looking some took out there phones and took photos asking if they knew who you were that upset you a little you went to this school for 3 years and people only saw yourself really only when you became “pretty” but still u were now super nervous now but your rember your main target Lee heeseung you clutched your purse and went straight to your classroom people Turing around seeing who entered you sat in a random seat next to a girl you’ve never seen she seemed super bubbly she was quiet a talker to “hello!!”you were shocked by her sudden loudness “oh…sorry…that must’ve been to loud “she lowers her voice you giggled “it’s okay why do you seem so excited tho”she turend to you with a big smile “well it’s my last year of Highschool and I get to meet new people so I’m really exited I Gusse “you just nodded an okay “oh I’m chu btw!” Ofc a cute girl with a cute name made sense “I’m y/n” you smiled at her “I’m guessing that this isn’t your first year “”nope I’ve gon sense freshman year here so I can tell you a lot about here if u want “she smiled brightly and hugged you you’ve never had a freind before so this was all knew “tysm!! Oh sorry is hugging now your thing”she looked at you but you didn’t know if the only freind you were sorta making would leave you if she found out but you trusted her “ah sorry I’m just not really used to having freinds or talking to people “she looked at you confused “your littlest drop dead gorgeous and no one can take there eyes off you” you giggled awkwardly “okay I’ll tell you I a secret up until my junior year I was a big nerd and I wanted a change so here’s the knew and improved me “you smiled happily until ofc someone had to walk in and ruin your fun lee heeseung

Your smile went down and chu noticed “what’s wrong y/n”he heard her say your name and wiped his head that way looking confused cause he didn’t notice you until chu said your name again “y/nnn can you hear me are you okay “ you let out a little cough rember not to break “yeah I’m okay sorry “and just as you were minding your busses heeseung came up to you “wow I really can believe it they park y/n dosent look like a nerd anymore “u just rolled your eyes at him “what do you want lee I’m not playing games with you anymore “he came close to your ear “just cause you changed dosent mean you aren’t my toy still isn’t that right doll”you didn’t know what to say he always caught your tongue “now go get me some snacks from the lunch room I’m hungry “he put 20 dollars on the desk expecting you to pick it up and run over there like always “no”you looked up at him and stood up took the money and threw it at him chu also seemingly upset “you know what heeseung if you want a stupid snack go get it your damn self “he seemed shocked a your response but started to smirk “right I’m sorry I wouldn’t want you running in that skirt you might wanna pull it down “chu getting ready to defend you but you didn’t need her to cause this is what you prepared for all summer “no I think it’s fine actually it’s ment to be like this but if you done being a dick you can go “everyone in the class stunned now not at the fact that you just told off they lee heeseung but at the fact that your the girl who used to do everyone’s homework that you were heeseung toy but just cause your not a nerd anymore dosent mean your not still off limits

//lunch time\\

By lunch time you already had 9 boys come to ask you for your insta and 12 girls ask what different makeup products you use or what you skin care was but those were the good things there were people saying you had gotten plastic surgery you did certain things just to get the money for your stuff people even said there was no way you were lee heeseungs little toy and if you wondering why they call you Lee heeseungs toy it’s cause he could pick at every part of you body and you did what he wanted he could slap you pull your hair push you and you still always did what he wanted you to do but he had made it every clear that you were only his to fuck with and no one eleses

You had saten down with chu to eat lunch her happily taking a bite of food made you happy you finally had a friend well let’s say a couple freinds you had met this boy really shy but nice named soobin and another boy who was more outgoing beomgyu they were also new and just transferred so your guises group was prefect but anyways you all were sitting down and enjoyed your food you were happy for once out of your Highschool life you finally had people you could go to the mall with have sleepovers go to party’s with but ofc like always you were knocked out of you thoughts by yet again heeseung he had just pushed a kid to the floor for getting him the wrong dumplings him jake and sunghoon walking away from the boy they had just scared heeseung walked passed you but Sunghoon said something and walked back to where you were “hey y/n” you looked up seeing as Sunghoon and Jake never really participated in heeseungs stupidness but they did have there fare share of “fun “with it “hey sunghoon”you said coldly”huh “he stuck his tongue threw his cheek “it really is you then HOWD you get so much hotter over summer I mean you were a cute girl but now your really js something eles “as he was about to start going closer heeseung pushed him away not to hard but just enough to make him stumble “what the hell do you think your doing “ “not like your ever gonna do anything plus she wouldn’t dare you even if you wanted we all know she’s your toy but she can speak for herself “ you saw heeseung clenching his fist but it made you angry how he thought he could control you “I told you everyone knows y/n is off limits “ “off limits to bully I’m not bullying her I’m simpling asking if she wants to go out sometime “ as heeseung was about to open his mouth you answerd “y-yes “they both looked stunned beomgyu soobin and chu having there mouths open wide “I would like to go out with you sometime “ “doll chose very wisely here “ “you don’t get to control me heeseung I’m done with your bull shit you can’t just walk all over me agian “ heeseung Just loooked at you with an expression you couldn’t understand “you heard her anyways y/n uh I’ll pick you up Saturday and 4:30 “you nodded your head smiling heesung had stormed off at that point.

//the next day\\

“Y/NN THERE YOU ARE “chu comes rushing to you sitting pulling out the chair and sitting in it she seemed to exited “yk chu sometimes I wonder if you on something “she just laughs “we’re not talking about that rn LOOK THO” she hands you her phone and it was a party ofc the boys were having as a welcome back to school like they did every year but you had never gone but this year you were definitely going no matter what even if you had to sneak out “holy shit the back to school party “”yeah it’s gonna be at jakes house tonight so we better go shopping after school “you both looked at eachother cause obviously you guys had no idea what to wear to a back to school party

//at the mall\\

“Ughhhhh y/n we’ve been to three dress shops already and you’ve liked non of them “she said dragging her feet with bags in her hands “look chu my dress it has to be different then something I would normally wear if I was the old me remember we’re gonna go out with a banger and If I were you I would go return the dress cause this dress shop is they best”as soon as you guys step into the dress shop chus mouth drops and gose to pick up a dress “Y/N YOU WERE SO RIGHT OMG “ you start to look for dresses to seeing witch one you like it came down to three dresses a white one simple and short but cute a blue one the had sparkles and a slimy black one with a diamond straps as soon as you came out in the blue one chu loved it it fit your body perfectly glitter on is and everything you would be shining with the lights they would have and you knew this was gonna be the one you got some simple black heels to for the dress witch you loved as you guys were leaving the store ofc you had to see heeseung and 6 of his guy freinds you were fucked “yooo hold up “Jake stops you and everyone is looking at you and chu”see what I tell you heeseung it was her and uh what’s your name”he looks at chu confused “o-oh I’m chu”he looked at her up and down “cute” your a bit nervous cause everyone still had there eyes on you normally you would just hide away but no you weren’t going to go down “my god can you fucking pervs look at something eles “heeseung grabed your had and took you into a hallway where others weren’t at “h-HEY let go of me “he released your arm and put u up agains the wall making you a bit flustered “doll see your starting to piss me off just cause you where this stupid shit only makes you look like a slut and you going out with Sunghoon lemme just tell you this if you wake up the next day and he’s gone don’t ever expect to hear from him again and this big mouth of yours needs to learn how to shut the fuck up “he let you go as you feel to the floor being in this position triggered something and you remembered

-flash back-

The three girls you were so afraid of had gotten done beating you leaving you on the rooftop heeseung had come out of the corner he was watching everything happen in coming up to you you looked up at him and your eyes got watery he grabed your face and looked at you “don’t cry it only makes you look pathetic”and he let go of your face and walked away later that day you found a bandage on you desk but didn’t know who put it there

-end of flash back-

“OMG Y/n”chu ran up to you finding you on the floor holding your chest “are you okay what happend did he hurt you are you crying “”I’m im fine chu ty “she helped you up and you guys left the mall you didn’t have time to cry and be sad you were going to this party no matter what like you said

//arriving at party\\

Soobin had picked you guys up all four of you guys going to the party as u guys got off people do what they do gossiping like there’s no tmrw anyways you walk thru the door being greeted by Sunoo even tho he was friends with the boys he wasn’t a complete jack ass “omg so glad you guys could make it” hugging u and chu and giving the boys a side hug “well um if u guys want drinks there in the kitchen and yeah pretty much just enjoy but go greet the boys if u want “ u guys nodded beomgyu chu and soobin going to say hi to there friends as you went alone to go get a drink “hey you guys want a drink “they all nodded saying a beer was good u walked into the kitchen seeing people make out drinking laughing and partying as this was your first party you didn’t imagine it to be exactly like the tv Highschool shows but hey you couldn’t complain walking up to the alcohol section seeing jay and sunghoon he waved at you as u came up to him “damn y/n you look amazing “Sunghoon said “thank you I didn’t exactly know if this was a good fit but now that I know you like it I’m guessing it was “sunghoon and jay scanning you from top to bottom “so uh y/n you want a drink “jay had asked “yeah just give me four beers “he nodded sunghoon pulling you by your waist and bending down to your ear a little “hey I just wanted to make sure you were okay yk after what happened”you felt an Aw because he actually cared you wispers back into his ear “yeah I’m fine I wasn’t gonne let him get to me “he smirked looking at you and gave u a kiss witch you were not prepared for but ofc someone was watching you the entire time and pushed him off you “what the fuck sunghoon”you could tell heeseung was mad but why what reasons did he have to be upset “oh hey heeseung”sunghoon smirked at him like as if he knew he wasn’t supposed to be doing what he just did “don’t fucking hey heeseung me what the fuck do you think your doing “ “I mean I thought it was pretty clear I was kissing her “hey you guys cmon don’t fight “jay stood beetween the boys “yeah cmon heeseung don’t sweat it we’re just having some fun “ those words hurt you you thought sunghoon liked you or were you really just there for his entertainment now?

You put your head down a bit upset and you saw heeseung smirking “what’s wrong doll I told you aren’t I right “ you were annoyed at heeseung at the fact he was right again but you felt embarrassed “shut the fuck up heeseung “ “dont be mad doll you guys were just having fun right “ in that moment it clicked to sunghoon the way he had said it and he felt bad “wait y/n that’s not how I mean it” u we’re gonna take this as your opportunity to get back at heeseung “you smiled at Sunghoon going up to him whispering in his ear leaving heeseung and jay curious “don’t worry I know we’re having fun but heeseung just ruined it so can you take me where we can have fun” you left sunghoon speechless the girl who always had to run errands for his bsf and who would always get picked on was now so bold and a bit flustered “u-uh yeah sure “ he grabed your arm guiding you to what you assumed was jakes guest room but as you looked back you could see a very annoyed heeseung

//15 min after entering the room\\

As you and sunghoon were making out his shirt already off and your dress guliding up to your hips sunghoon s hands placed on your thighs massaging them you were nervous but just as he was about to go under you stopped him “hoon wait um it’s my first time so I’m kinda scared”he just smiled at you “hey we don’t have to do it if you don’t want we can take things slow” maybe heeseung was wrong maybe he really did like you and you were gonna shove it in his face that you and his bsf were gonna be together “well do u js wanna watch a movie and cuddle” by this time you were ready to sleep so u agreed “yeah but um do you know if Jake has any clothes to borrow or I could js sleep in this I don’t wanna bother” he got you and went to a drawer in the room “scince we stay at jakes a lot we basically all have are own room heres my shirt “ he throws you a plain white tee but no pants so you look confused at him a bit “oh did you want like shorts or somthing sorry” he was about to go back but you stopped him “no like this is fine I actually prefer to sleep like this “ he just nodded and he went to change into something more comfortable but you didn’t expect him to come back with no shirt so you gasped seeing his pretty toned body “what?” He asks you just blush and shake your head as he smirks the rest of the night was fun but you fell asleep that night not thinking anything of it

//the next morning \\

Your eyes fluttered as you heard a knock on the door and seeing Jake come in the room made you panic and in that moment you wanted to die sunghoon still sleep until “YO WHAT THE FUCK SUNGHOON” and in that moment sunghoon woke up “nah dude I feel so betrayed you promised to help me clean but instead you got to fuck y/n “ and cause ofc everyone had heard jake yell Niki sunoo and heeseung came to the room and your eyes met heeseungs and you could see clearly he was upset “ Jake we didn’t fuck she just slept over “ “yk that’s hard to BELIEVE when she’s wearing your shirt and you have no shirt “ Jake had a point but it was the truth you guys really had not done anything “actually it wouldn’t be hard to believe sense y/n s a slut” you got up from the bed and threw the pillow at heeseung “you know heeseung just cause your a fucking whore dosent mean I am and I just borrowed his clothes you idiot so fuck off “ scince you had no shorts and just a shirt the boys just looked at you niki and sunoo deciding it was better to leave but heeseung was about to say something but sunghoon had cut him off “ hyung can you please just let this go “ and with that sunghoon just closed the door on them and locked it and in that moment you both realized you had school “ughhh we have school “ “we can always skip “ you quickly refused never once missing a day not wanting to hurt your perfect attendance “ cmon y/n don’t be such a nerd or are you still the old y/n?” You knew he was only saying that to persuade you but it did work “ I mean n-no I just um wouldn’t know what we would do “ sunghoon just shook his head at you “ we could just chill go to the mall do anything are you really that boring ?” Offended at his hitting him on his bicep “let’s just chill then “

//after schoo\\

After school normally the boys would all go to jakes house tk study play games shit like that witch they all did thinking that y/n would be gone by then but they were very wrong when they see y/n and sunghoon on the couch asleep “holy shit heeseung hyung is not gonna be happy” jungwon picked you up and ran with you on his back you being confused when jungwon locked his door and threw you on the bed “WHAT TH-“ jungwon covers your mouth muffling your yelling until you stoped “shut the fuck up unless you want to make heeseung hyung and sunghoon hyung hate eachother more right now “ honestly you couldn’t give a fuck less and if this made heeseung miserable then you had every reason not to care “ why should I care on fact I actually don’t mind going back ou-“ jungwon grabed your hand pinning you on the wall wtf is it with everyone pinning you on the wall “ look I know heeseung hyung did fucked up shit and I know it’s fucked up we didn’t do anything but we all grow from our mistakes and plus now your like hot so please just shut the fuck up and well stay in here”.

———————————————————————————-

Okay well I’m im just gonna leave this here I feel like I had y’all eating for too long I honestly thought I would be done with this by now but I went on a family vacation recently so I had no time but I’ll try to make the next part as quick as possible ty all sm for being patient

#enhypen #enhypen smut #fanfic #jungwon #cherry1sblogs #kpop smut #jake sim #sunghoon #sunghoon smut #heeseung smut #sunoo #jay park

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mountttmase · 1 year

Note

I feel awful requesting this but mason being really poorly and being sent home from training and then y/n looks after him and maybe says I don’t want to tell you so mase but you know you aren’t well enough to train today so come on in to bed now please and I will bring you some medicine and some food and a drink but don’t leave the bed unless it’s to go to the loo

Under The Weather

Note - Thank you for this anon :) I would love to look after a poorly Mase 💙

Pairing - Mason Mount x Reader

Word count - 2k

Warnings - lots of poorly Mase and some fluff

Working from home was never your favourite, as much as you tried to stay focused, knowing you were home and surrounded by all your things distracted you to no end. It was almost 3 in the afternoon and you were starting to feel a bit snacky so after putting your status to away, you fled the study and made your way to the kitchen.

You saw Masons bag sat by the door, but you didn’t think anything of it until you saw your boyfriend laying face first into the cushions. The gentle snore emitting from him confirmed to you immediately that he was asleep and you’d stood there looking at him a little confused and uncertain of what to do.

He shouldn’t of been home for another few hours, and you were unsure as to why he was asleep as you’d both gotten a pretty early night the evening before. You took a step towards him but before you made any contact he shuffled about and onto his side so you were able to get a better look at him. He skin was grey and sunken in, yet his nose looked painfully red in comparison and your heart broke at the sight of him. His snoring seemed to get louder and louder, clearly the result of a blocked nose, until he snored so loud he woke himself up. His blearily eyes catching yours as he took in his surroundings and tried to remember where he was.

‘Mase? you okay, baby?’ You asked softly, kneeling down by his head so you could brush his hair out of his face.

‘I think I’m sick’ he told you, his eyes fluttering shut as you gently scratched over his scalp. His voice sounded hoarse and you could tell it was a bit painful for him to speak. ‘Got sent home from training early’

‘When did you get in?’

‘Like 2 o’clock’

‘Why didn’t you come and get me?’ You breathed but he shook his head, nuzzling into the cushion even more.

‘You’re working, I didn’t want to disturb you’

‘Mase’ you sighed, feeling his head a realising he was burning up a little bit. ‘You’re health is more important’

‘I can look after myself, I’m a big boy’ he told you and you could help but laugh. Even when he was sick he still managed to be his silly self. You sighed, pulling on his arm so he would move but he didn’t seem to want to budge.

‘Come on, let’s get you to bed you’ll feel so much more comfortable up there’ you muttered and after a small string of whines, he sat up and allowed you to pull him with you and you led him by the hand up to your shared room. ‘Let’s get you changed, yeah?’ You told him, trying to strip him of his training gear and he let you pull his hoodie from him before grabbing the hem of T-shirt.

‘Even when I’m sick you can’t help but get me naked’ he huffed whilst you pulled his joggers down before sitting him on the edge of the bed so you could pull them from his legs, leaving him sat in his boxers.

‘Very funny’ you rolled your eyes at him before grabbing him a fresh T-shirt and a pair of his grey shorts. Once he was dressed again you felt his forehead to feel he was still warm but you could visibly shivering so you grabbed him a new hoodie. ‘I think you’ve got a fever Mase, why don’t we get you in bed so you can sweat it out’ you told him as his head popped through the hole. Once he was settled you told him to stay awake whilst you got him some things.

Once you’d returned from the kitchen, you could see he was still sat up, but but head was leant forward so you knew he’d dozed off again. You quickly put everything on his bedside table before gently trying to stir him awake again, holding his jaw and stroking his cheek until his eyes met yours.

‘Can you sit up for two seconds, baby? Then I’ll let you sleep yeah?’ You told him and he shuffled around a little until he was sat up better. Mason was rarely sick so to see him all miserable and out of sorts broke your heart. ‘Take these for me Mase’ you asked him, handing him a few painkillers and a glass of water but he let out an upset whimper at the sight. ‘I know I know but you’ll feel so much better I promise’

You could see it was a struggle for him to swallow but he got them down eventually before you helped him get tucked in, dropping a kiss on his forehead when he was finally settled. He pouted at you as you went to stand, keeping you sat at his side as you brushed some hair out of his face.

‘I really want a kiss but I don’t want you to get sick’ he mumbled, so you lent down to place a quick peck on his lips, causing him to smile at getting his own way. ‘Much better’ he breathed and he snuggled further into the pillows and you laughed at his neediness.

‘I’ll bring my laptop in and finish up working in here yeah? I don’t want to leave you like this’

‘No baby it’s fine, I’ll only be asleep anyway. I’ve got my phone so I’ll text you if I need anything. Don’t worry about me I’ll be good’

‘You sure?’

‘Promise’ he nodded and you sighed whilst standing up to leave as he slowly fell back to sleep.

You popped back downstairs to grab the snack you’d originally gone for before returning to your desk and flying through your work as quickly as you could. You decided to finish up 15 minutes early so you could look after Mason and when you walked into your room he was sat up watching tv.

‘How’s the patient?’ You asked as you made you way over to him and he gave you a sleepy smile.

‘Better I think. I’ve been awake for about ten minutes now’ he told you, his voice still sounding painful.

‘How about I go make you a nice honey and lemon, then I’ll make you some food’ you told him, feeling his head to see his temperature had gone down but he was still a bit clammy. ‘Some soup will do you good’ you nodded and he gave a small nod back like it was all he could muster.

You bought him back up a hot honey and lemon and even though he tried to protest, you made him a drink a little bit, telling him it’ll help his throat. He grimaced the whole time but you couldn’t be too made at him when he was sick.

You made him some soup like you promised and took it up to him, setting it on his lap on a tray before standing up from the bed but he grabbed your wrist as you went to walk away, turning to see a sad pout on his lips.

‘Aren’t you going to stay with me’ he grumbled and you laughed whilst kissing his forehead.

‘Yes you big baby, but I wanna eat too. I’m just running to get mine and I’ll be back up’ you told him and he looked at you with a shy smile.

‘Oh sorry’ he whispered, letting you go get your food before sitting next to him in bed whilst you both watched whatever was on tv. You knew when he was done as he rested his head on your shoulder, sighing heavily as you knew he was feeling fed up and useless.

‘How does a shower sound, Masey?’ You asked, resting your head on-top on his as you felt him nod.

‘Will you come with me though’ you heard him mumble and you agreed, pulling him up and walking him into en-suite. Once undressed you pulled him under the water before grabbing some shampoo and massaging it into his scalp and he shut his eyes as he held onto your waist.

‘This is shit’ he hummed as you continued washing his hair. ‘You’re literally standing in front of me naked and wet and I couldn’t do anything about it even if I tried’ he told you whilst shaking his head with a smile. You laughed at him whilst pressing a few kisses to his jaw, telling him once he was feeling better you could take as many showers as he wanted together. Once it was all rinsed out, he pulled you into a hug and you both stood there with the warm water cascading over the two of you as you tried to comfort him as best you could.

‘Stay here and get dry’ you told him, wrapping a warm towel around his body. ‘I’ll go get you some clean clothes yeah? I’m gonna change the sheets too’ you mused aloud as he clung to you again. ‘Come on Mase, I’ll be quick and you can get back into bed all nice and comfy’ you reassured him and with a final kiss to his cheek he let you go.

15 minutes later and he was all tucked in and once you were dressed, you decided to join him, picking up your book up so you wouldn’t be too bored if he fell asleep again but as soon as you sat down he turned to face you, resting his head in your lap as he hugged your legs. You smiled down at the sleepy boy as you raked your fingers through his hair.

‘How you feeling Mase?’ You whispered and he smiled up at you shyly.

‘Much better. Thank you for looking after me’ he told you before kissing your thigh gently. ‘You’re gonna be the best mum to our kids’ he breathed quietly and you almost didn’t hear him but you blushed at his words. You knew Mason wanted a family but for him to confirm that he wants kids with you made your insides churn. You weren’t sure what to reply and when you looked down he was already flat out.

‘Love you’ you whispered, not knowing if he could hear you, before opening your book.

The next morning you woke up to an empty bed, and you were unsure as to where Mason was. After a quick look round the house you eventually found him in the kitchen filling up his water bottle. He was dressed in his Chelsea training gear but one look at his face told you he still wasn’t well enough to go. You crossed your arms with an unimpressed look on your face as he turned to face you.

‘What do you think you’re doing’ you scolded him and he looked at you with wide eyes before coughing. The look of pain that flashed across his face told you he was still sick and no matter what he was about to say, you’d make sure he was back in bed soon.

‘I’ve got training’ he croaked and you shook your head at him.

‘Don’t think so Mr. You get back to bed’

‘But babe-‘

‘No Mase, you’re still too sick and if you go to training you’ll feel even worse. I’m sorry but you’re not going and that’s final’ you told him sternly and he pouted at you before dropping his head in defeat.

‘Fine’ he huffed and you stood to the side as he walked passed you and up towards the stairs. You followed him and made sure he got changed and back into bed and he looked at you with a sad face as you kissed his forehead.

‘Poor baby, you look so cute when you’re grumpy’ you teased and he huffed in annoyance. ‘I’m going to get ready for work and then I’ll sort you some food and medicine out yeah? And I don’t want you out of that bed under any circumstances unless you need the loo. Got it?’

‘Yes’ he rasped and you gave him one final smile before leaving the room. ‘Y/n?’ He called and you turned to look at him with raised eyebrows. ‘Love you’

You smiled at him, a warm feeling spreading through you at his words because even though he was stubborn sometimes, he knew you were only looking out for him. You sent him a small smile and nodded, watching him settle down and shut his eyes as your poorly boyfriend drifted back off to sleep.

#mason mount #mason mount imagine #mason mount fanfic #mason mount blurb #mason mount x y/n #mason mount x reader #footballer x y/n #footballer x reader #mason mount request

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clumsiestgiantess · 3 months

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Cold weather prompt part 3! Since it’s angst day, I thought I might as well offer some angsty writing of my own @entomolog-t come and get it!

Stretching my arms high over my head, I wake up for the day and instinctively flinch, expecting my hands to whack painfully against the wooden wall behind my bed. They don’t, and I let my arms fall back down confusedly. A few seconds later, my foggy half-sleep disperses and I remember where I am. There’s clamoring noise coming from the other room, probably the reason I woke up. I didn’t want to leave the new bed I’d been gifted; even inside the air was cold, and the sun hadn’t even risen. In this blanket, all of that disappears as if by magic. It’s like no material I’ve ever felt. This type of soft and insulated fabric is extremely difficult for a borrower to get — rarely ever discarded by humans for the taking.

How does it manage to stay so warm? The echo of footsteps in the hallway sends my nerves readily spiked with adrenaline, and suddenly I’m out of bed. Alice appears in the doorway, in a hurry once again. “Oh! Good morning!” she greets me, “You were sleeping so soundly I thought I might have to write you a note to tell you when I’d be back.” Nodding with a tired yawn, I watch as she packs a drawstring bag with various utensils. “Another one of those exams?” I ask her, concerned that her worried behavior hadn’t changed despite my return.

“Yes,” Alice sighs, “I think I understand the material better, though. After you fell asleep, I stopped complaining so loudly about things I didn’t understand because I didn’t want to wake you. I guess I just needed to calm down and think things through a bit instead of just cramming everything at once. Seems like a silly thing to learn now of all times, hmm?” I’m not quite sure what sort of ‘cramming’ she was doing while I was asleep, but I nodded along politely.

“If I was a bother in any way sleeping here…” “Nonsense!” Alice waves a hand nonchalantly at me, “If anything, you being here calmed me down.” There was a brief silence as Alice tugged her bag closed. “Thank you.” Her voice softened, stepping up to the desk where I stood. “That must’ve been a hard decision for you to make. Just know, I’m glad you did what you did. Don’t get me wrong; I’m still stressed. But I think I would be a lot more stressed without knowing you were alright.”

A warm feeling similar to pride swells in my chest. It isn’t often that I’m assured I’ve done the right thing. “When will you be back?” I ask, for once genuinely wanting her to be around. Usually it’s the opposite; humans being out of the house is prime time for collecting harder-to-get materials. “Just about three hours,” Alice replies. That gives me time enough.

I’ve been meaning to check the outdoor faucet and drain some of the water. Sometimes, when no one’s been using it for a while, it stops running through the makeshift spigot I’ve set up in my home beneath the floor. It stopped working a few days ago and I’ve been meaning to go run it. These days it seems like I’m always running low on the precious liquid.

“Will you be alright here without me? Do you need me to help you down?” Glancing around for my bag — and inside it my climbing gear — I found it resting in a spot just to the left of my very cozy bed. Nodding satisfactorily, I turned back to the human who’d gone to sling her bag over the side of her shoulder. “I’ll be fine!” I assure her, “I am alone in your house often enough to know what I’m doing.” “Right!” Alice gasps, “I forgot you’ve been living here… Ok, s- see you when I get home?” It was a question, not a statement — unsure whether I was willing to let a freak occurrence like this happen again.

“Yes, I’ll be around. I always am. Call for me, and this time I’ll actually listen.” Alice’s smile brightens almost relievedly. Saying another quick goodbye, she steps out of the room and down the hall. I stand and listen until the sound of the door locking behind her reaches my ears. Clapping my hands and rubbing them together readily, I scoop up my things. “Alright, three hours. Time to go pay a visit to the water pipes.

Stepping around my perfect bed, I snatch my bag off the ground and rummage through its contents. I sigh in relief. Everything is here. Taking out my grapple and securely attaching it to the wooden ledge, I let the rope fall to the floor and lift myself onto it, slowly easing more and more of my weight on the cord to ensure it would hold me before scaling down. “Now all I need are a few supplies and I’ll be on my way.”

Only after arriving safely home do I realize I forgot the thread I’d journeyed all the way to Alice’s room for. Cursing my obvious mistake, I blame it on my disoriented awakening and began exchanging borrowing supplies for another set of equipment — boots that would cushion my fall to the ground outdoors, and a tough strip of fabric to help me grip and turn the spout’s handle that was meant for much stronger hands than my own. “I’ll just have to go back for the thread later. Alice will probably take me back to her room herself when she gets home.”

Alice. How is it that a person can be so frightening yet so welcoming at the same time? If you’d asked me a week ago what I thought I’d be doing in several days, you could’ve had me guessing for hours on end before I’d even think to answer: ‘Well, I think I’d be snuggling up in Alice’s hands and sleeping beside her on her desk, of course!’

Certainly not Alice. I’ve had nightmares about her before. During the summer, she’d kill every bug she stumbled upon without hesitation — some of them even spitefully. While it’s true I’m no bug, her general ferocity towards small creatures living in her home was more than enough to put me on edge for a month or two. Why was she so kind to me? Alice knows I’m.. not human. She knows that I’ve always been this small, that I’ve been living off the things she’s bought, in her apartment.

An embarrassed red rushes to my cheeks, and I shake my head stubbornly. That’s not even a thing for a borrower like me to be embarrassed of! I’m proud I’ve managed to live with a human for so long without her even knowing I’m here! Yet, the thought of Alice — the radiating warmth of her hands, the steady thrum of her pulse — is tantalizing to think about. I don’t even realize that I’m standing in the middle of the hall in dazed silence until someone moves something on the floor above, startling me.

Relax, Fen. She’s just a.. strangely benevolent human.. who saved your life. Ack! Thinking about this sort of thing is bizarre; just focus on the task at hand. Jogging the rest of the way there, I slip through a vent on the side of the building and into the chilling winter air outside. Seconds later, I hit the ground with buckled knees to further cushion my landing. If anything, this frigid weather should snap me out of my funk. Expertly, I skirt around the side of the building along the decorative bushes and reach the edge of the side wall. A water spout curves away from the concrete here.

Using the same grapple I’d slid down the desk with, I take a few good swings and attach it to the handle. My weight isn’t enough to set the water off, so I clamber up. All goes well as I use the strip of strong fabric I collected from my home to yank the faucet on, then let it run for a while. I can feel it through the pipe — freezing enough to make my skin burn red in seconds by just touching it. Thankfully, I don’t need much longer to get the water running through it smoothly again. Any longer and I’d risk someone spotting me unawares. Once, I’d nearly been grabbed by a child while doing this, but I’d jumped into a bush nearby and clung to a hidden branch until they’d gone.

With the coast remaining clear, I head back down. Just as I unhook my grapple from the handle, the sound of large footsteps rumbles over the paved walkway to my right. I dart beneath a bush and watch as two humans walk down the path towards the faucet. Fortunately, I’m finished using it, and there isn’t a trace of me for them to spot. “Watch out!” one human warns, “There’s some ice over-” “WOAH!” The other human yelps and slips over the frozen spot, reaching out and catching themself on the side of the building before they hit the ground. I freeze where I am. “You ok?” “Yeah, I just slid a little.” The humans walk carefully off, and I let out a relieved breath. Neither of them had noticed me.

Trekking back over to the vent, I wind up and cast my hook at one of the metal slats. The two pieces of metal collide and bounce off eachother, my grappling hook sliding uselessly down the closed grate. Closed? It’s.. It’s never closed! I-It’s not supposed to be closed! Oh no. The human who’d slipped had fallen against the building here. They’d hit the metal slits and accidentally whacked them shut. Shit.

The wind suddenly seems colder — the bushes sparser — as I make my way to the front doors. It’s already a rather cloudy day, but I swear the clouds weren’t such an ugly shade of rippling grey when I first arrived. Through the floor-to-ceiling windows at the front of the building, I can see the lobby. So close yet so far; I’ll never make it through such a big space without getting caught. A shiver wracks my body as the wind picks up. I’m not supposed to be out here this long, not without the new clothing I need to stitch for myself. Even though the weather’s a bit warmer than the freezing temperatures I was caught in before, it’s by no means warm.

Desperate for at least some heat, I slip behind a discarded cup near the entrance, my skin numbing then prickling with warmth every time the doors open. For just a few moments, I get relief before I’m shut out again. WHAK I cover my mouth to keep from yelping as something hits the ground right behind me. Whirling around in utter terror, I fear the worst: a human found me. A relieved chuckle bubbles out of my throat as I realize it’s just a splash of water.. from.. above me.

No no no. No, please it can’t be. Two more drops of water hit the pavement around me. “AHHH!” I cry out as a freezing raindrop hits me square in the back. My vision blurs briefly, my head pounding with fear. Terrified, I glance around the walkway. No one was around to hear me, but that wasn’t nearly as frightening as what I did see — one of the most dreaded things a person like me can encounter while venturing outside.

There’s an ominous crackling onslaught of noise before I can even spot the wall of water racing across the parking lot faster than any human can travel. It’s the kind of situation where all you can do is stand in one spot, utterly helpless to stop whatever awful thing is coming for you. Terror is coming from so far away, but there isn’t a single thing you can do to stop it. Instead, you stand back and watch.

Water pounds over me, stinging my skin with freezing projectiles. I’m on the ground in an instant. My own lungs choke my throat of air, convinced I’m drowning when I’m not. I take a few gasping breaths to try and assuage it; my face nearly presses against the pavement to do so. “Please,” I whine, unsure whether it’s the rain or my tears rolling down my cheeks. If I could just get to cover.

Weakly, I struggle to haul myself towards the foliage I’d left behind. I flinch and falter with every new pelting droplet of water that tears into my numb flesh. Panic grips my chest when I pull my hands back to my head, only to find them bloodied and shredded after trying to drag myself across the rugged cement. I can’t move; I can’t breathe. I’m dying. I’M DYING. “HELP! Someone please!” The last word I speak comes out in a nasty rasping groan as I’m hit again.

Thunder rumbles rhythmically around me. I doubt anyone could even hear- “Fen? Fen!” Holding a numb hand up against my brows, I barely manage to recognize the looming form of a human kneeling beside me. Seconds later, the drilling raindrops cease. Everything’s blissfully quiet and numb. I lay there and pant. “Fen, what are you doing out here?! I told you I’d be back! Why on Earth would you-? Oh please be alright!”

Slim fingers slip delicately beneath me and I wheeze a pained gasp. It hurts everywhere. Every breath shakes in my throat with a keening whine. Soon, I'm hoisted cautiously into the air, covered by a second hand to block the horrifying bombardment outside. I bask in the freedom to breathe properly, though my relief is largely shadowed by pain. When at last I’m deposited onto a tabletop, Alice tries to rub me dry with a hand towel. “AHHGGGGHH!” She flinches harshly away from me. “E-Everything burns,” I gasp. “The.. rain…”

I peel off my shirt in a hurry. Large red welts bloom along my skin where I was hit with the freezing water. Alice gasps, and I tilt my head up slightly to look at her. Her hands are clasped over her open mouth as she stares at me with a horrified expression. “Fen..” she whispers, voice laced with tears. Tears begin to sting my eyes as well, but with pain rather than pity. The human rushes away while I sit there and shake. I don’t want to, but I tear off my pants, too. Their course material stings awfully. When Alice returns, she hesitates very slightly at my appearance, but quickly moves closer with a tube of some strange ointment in hand, and my blanket in the other.

“N-No!” I struggle away as she reaches to place it over me. “It’s ok, it’s ok, see? The blanket’s a lot softer.” The fabric falls over me and I cinch up, only to drag it closely around myself not a moment later. She’s right. It hurts, but not nearly as badly. A few minutes of shaking later, and I begin warming up again. “Oh Fen, will you be alright? Why were you out there in the rain? If I was running late.. or if I hadn’t heard you.. you..” Tears start rolling down her face. “I- I’m ok.” My voice is still raspy, but at least I’m warm enough to speak.

Alice wipes her tears away with a few swipes of her wrist. “H-Here, I brought you some medicine. Once you warm up a bit more, you can put it on.” We waited as I told her what had happened. However, the more I heated up, the more feeling returned tomy body, and the more painful things became. After so long, I couldn’t keep talking, and instead lay down sprawled out over the soft material, breathing shallowly. “You poor thing.” Without the blanket wrapped around me, she could finally see just how harshly the weather had treated me.

With gentle caution, Alice lifts one of my arms carefully onto the pads of her fingers. I inhale sharply, but she quiets me. “It’s alright; let me put this on you and I promise you’ll feel better, ok? This’ll heal up your skin in no time, I promise.” I nod and let myself go limp. Alice takes the ointment to my skin, rubbing it gently over all the reddened patches across my arms and chest. They sting briefly, but fade away soon after. My eyes are closed when she gasps and they flicker fearfully open. “What happened to your hands?”

“I tried to get myself beneath the bushes.. couldn’t make it.” Alice gives me a pitying look. She takes extra caution with them, dunking them in semi-warm water to get the dried blood off. They start bleeding again, and she shakily wraps them up in little strips of larger bandages. I try to do it myself so she doesn’t have to struggle with their tiny scale, but the bleeding only worsens, so I have to stop.

Eventually, once the front of me is cared for, Alice reaches for my sides. “I’m going to have to lift you up to get to your back. Will that be too painful for you, or should I do it?” Her fingers hesitate less than an inch from my torso. “Do it. I can take it. I’ll be alright.” My voice has grown a bit stronger. The pain is more intense than I thought, and I take in a sharp breath, but ask her to continue. This awful pain is all the more reason for me to get it taken care of now rather than later.

I can’t sleep, but neither can Alice. She sits beside me the whole time, occasionally getting me water, snacks, or just conversation throughout the night. A few minutes past midnight, I gasp. “Wait, your exams! Don’t you need to study!? I’ll be fine; you have to-”. “It’s alright, Fen. I don’t have anything tomorrow. Well, today now,” she amends, nodding at the microwave clock. I relax with a sigh.

“That’s rather sweet of you, though. You seem awfully worried about me for someone who didn’t believe I’d be kind enough to help them just a few days ago… Sorry,” she adds after a brief silence. “I don’t mean to sound rude. It’s just.. nice of you. I was thinking about it earlier, actually. If I were in your shoes — if I were scooped up by some massive being — I probably would’ve run away too, even if they did claim they wanted to help me.” I sit up curiously, flinching slightly at the pain in my back. “I- I still can’t imagine what life must be like for you. I mean, I’m sure it’s fun getting to run around secret places all day just living life to the edge instead of worrying about school and working jobs like me. But it must be scary, too. This is twice now in the last three days I’ve saved your life.”

I huff, slightly upset. “I’m not usually in that much danger.” Alice shifts closer to me and I glance up at her with a bowed head. “Alright,” she says simply. Gently, her chin falls onto her arms — crossed on the counter beside me. She doesn’t say anything else, but her eyebrows furrow slightly, eyes crinkling worriedly at the edges. I’ve never been so close to a human to notice all these small details before. My arm must’ve drifted between my lap and the air several indecisive times before I finally let myself reach for her.

All those little details shift and soften into a look of surprise muted by a soft relief. Her hand reaches for me, engulfing my entire forearm before sliding my palm gently onto the pad of her thumb, holding it with the side of her pointer finger pressed on top of it. Releasing my bandaged hand, her fingers drift upwards towards me. My heartbeat quickens, but I make no move to get away. A single gentle finger glides across my head, tucking some of my mussed hair back behind my ear and away from my eyes. Alice’s hand drifts back down and rests beside me, though her gaze never leaves mine.

“Now that you know I won’t hurt you,” the human begins quietly, “will you stay here? More.. out in the open? Where I can talk to you or.. hang out.. sometime?” Her cheeks redden slightly, and our gazes finally break as hers darts away from mine. “It’s ok if you don’t want to, you- you probably have a whole house somewhere around here that I’ll probably never see-” Quickly, I put a hand over hers beside me to stop her from babbling any further. “Alice, I still live here; I won’t be far. True, I don’t exactly have to sneak around the place to avoid you anymore, though. I’ll probably be walking through here all the time. We can stop to talk.. or hang out.. whenever you want.”

Alice gives me a grateful look. “I’d like that. It- It gets lonely sometimes,” she explains, again glancing embarrassedly away from me. I can’t help but smile. How could I have been afraid of a human so docile as her?

Less than an hour later, Alice is asleep. Her tired face rests smushed against the counter, breaths evenly and slowly rushing through the otherwise silent room. Something about the moment makes me smile despite the constant throbbing ache of my raw skin. She’s certainly nothing like how I thought she would be, but at the same time, everything I’d want her to be. “Please stay like this,” I whisper to no one but myself. “I know your kind is still awful. Don’t let them change you.”

#I’m thinking of doing an Alice pov of the first two parts next!#again just let me know if you’d like to see it!#g/t #giant/tiny

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gasolinerainbowpuddles · 10 months

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𝑭𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑳 𝑾𝑶𝑴𝑨𝑵 ║ Chapter 5 - I Hold a Beast, an Angel, and a Madman in Me

| RATING: explicit material | 18+ | WORD COUNT: 7.7k | CHAPTER WARNINGS: typical canon violence, mild self-harm

| CHAPTER SUMMARY: Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone doesn’t come without risk. Multiple incidents threaten to be a substantial setback in your hard-earned progress, and you rely on Joel to help you keep pushing forward.

║ＰＲＥＶＩＯＵＳ ║⋄── •✧• ──⋄║ ＮＥＸＴ ║

Please read with caution if you have difficulties with works concerning: SA, physical violence, torture, captivity, trauma, and similar topics as they are discussed throughout the series. All highly sensitive portions WILL BE MARKED with my sensitive material banner if you wish to skip the more challenging portions. The sensitive material banner looks like this:

“I ate a piece of jerky at 2:17 last night when I woke up to go pee,” you announced as soon as Joel answered the door.

His face pulled back for a moment, not expecting such a unique greeting, but he quickly recovered. “Wow, one whole piece? Got ourselves a daredevil in Jackson now, huh?” he deadpanned.

You wheezed a nervous laugh when you realized how silly you must have sounded. You dug into your depleted reserves of self-confidence and pushed through the conversation.

“Y-Yeah, that’s right. It’s a– I had a whole piece. A whole entire piece. Maybe I’ll, um, maybe it will be TWO pieces next time,” you boasted. For good measure you popped your hands on your hips and gave a lopsided shrug.

Your spirited, clumsy attempt at bragging and trash-talking over eating a single piece of jerky elicited a genuine belly laugh from Joel. The stilted guffaw was a clear indication you had caught him off guard with your unique style of casual, playful banter. You grinned ear to ear, excited just to have made him react in such a way. It was your new favorite hobby, seeing if you could get Joel to smile or laugh with a bit of back and forth.

“Fuck’s sake, get in here,” he laughed, shaking his head.

He propped the door open wider for you to enter, and you scooted past him quickly. It was market day again. After your failure of a first attempt, Joel helped you lay a bit of groundwork so you weren’t doomed from the start. He worked with you to organize your list so that it was one continuous path with no circling back or crossing aisles. “In and out” as he had told you. It sounded easy enough when he was in charge.

You wanted to try navigating through the store on your own, and Joel obliged with the sole condition that he could step in if he felt it was necessary. So far, he had only had to intervene once. Kevin the store clerk tried to strike up a friendly, casual conversation with you, and all you could do was fumble over your ration slips and blabber incoherently. Small talk seemed to be a tipping point for you.

Still, you worked through your nerves and went twice a week with Joel and Ellie to the market. Maria was quite pleased that Joel had offered to help out with such a clear gesture of commitment, and you wondered why she had made it sound like it wasn’t something she would expect coming from him.

Around the one month mark, your boots had finally started to get broken in. You, too, had molded a bit to the demands of “normal life.” The routine Susan had established for you proved to be crucial in your progress. Knowing what to expect and when to expect it gave you the comfort to build up a little more confidence each day. You had even discussed a sort of part time job with Maria - something to help you feel like you weren’t just a freeloader.

She considered it for a few days before returning with an offer. Patrol shift changes happened near the front gates, and there were a few tasks and odd jobs that would make the transition smoother for everyone. It would only be a few hours at a time here and there, you didn’t have to interact with people for very long, you’d be around some familiar faces, and it was enough work to make you feel useful. It also felt nice to have a bit of purpose other than keeping Susan company - not that you didn’t enjoy it.

Your new job wasn’t anything complicated. The assignments were pretty straightforward: keeping the supply closets straightened, setting up log books for shift change, opening up the handoff stations, keeping track of everyone’s recorded hours for Tommy to review, doing some light housekeeping like sweeping and wiping down surfaces. When you earned your first ration slip, Susan had insisted you keep it and put it in a small picture frame somewhere readily visible in your room. A reminder to yourself of how far you’ve come, she had said.

It was a bit ironic looking at the framed slip as it sat on your dresser in front of a covered mirror. You had draped a blanket across it, along with almost every other mirror in the house, just to avoid your own reflection. You couldn’t stand seeing yourself. It didn’t feel like it was you who was looking back. It felt like someone else. You much preferred just focusing on your internal workings and not worrying about the flat look in your eye every time you caught sight of yourself in a mirror.

When you had asked Susan if you could cover the mirrors, she was kind enough to not question why. In fact, she had offered to take some of the bigger ones off the wall entirely, but you insisted she not go through that sort of trouble. You didn’t want her to get hurt doing it, and there was something that felt so heartbreakingly final about removing them that you couldn’t condemn yourself to it.

You held onto the hope that one day you would be able to see you when you looked into a mirror. For now, you only had to avoid eye contact with the bathroom mirrors, which you had agreed to leave uncovered at Susan’s request. You had come far in your first month, but there was still so much further to go.

You finished up sweeping the hallways and busied yourself with small tasks as you waited for the patrol groups to switch over. Joel was scheduled today, and that meant you would wait for him to get back with the rest of the group so you could walk home together. You had come to look forward to your walks with just you and Joel. The addition of Ellie during your trips to the market were nice, too, but there was never the comfortable silence you craved when it was the three of you.

Joel wasn’t the most talkative person, you had come to learn. You had seen him several times speak barely a word to others around town or during patrol shift change. Even people he enjoyed the company of, like his brother Tommy, would only garner two or three word sentences from him at times. With you he seemed a bit more open, although you weren’t sure why. It was always pleasant whenever you had a conversation here and there, but really it was the way you could walk side by side in silence that had you eager.

It was the only time you could recall that there was quiet, both outside and inside your head. Your mind wasn’t closed off into that safe spot you had carved out for yourself. You had retreated to it so many times when you needed to disconnect from reality long enough for the bad things to pass. But you hadn’t gone there in weeks. Weeks!

When you walked with Joel, it was just stillness and calm. Your thoughts weren’t racing. You weren’t on high alert. You could just enjoy the much too short walk home, side by side with your silent companion.

Then the times that you did want to talk, Joel didn’t seem bothered by that either. He never made you feel like an idiot when you tripped over your words or struggled to figure out how to express yourself. You hadn’t done it in so long that you were relearning much of the skillset. He even let you practice small talk with him, even though both of you hated engaging in it. It was one of those necessary evils that you had to tolerate if you were going to be sociable with others in Jackson.

Three weeks into your part time work, and you were offering simple greetings to some of the more familiar faces. Most of the ones you were brave enough to interact with had been part of the original patrol group that discovered you. They knew exactly what sort of circumstances you had come from and as such gave you a wide berth whenever you interacted. They all seemed to be rooting for you and wordlessly cheering you on as you found it in yourself to branch out and feel more confident addressing people.

There were others that made you feel on edge, although it was your history to blame rather than anything on their end. Some of the men got too close for your comfort but mostly backed off if they sensed you were ill at ease. In general it was just a lot of people focused on getting ready to start patrol or intent on finishing up whatever they needed to in order to end their shift. You could stay in the fringes, unnoticed and unbothered by the majority of people coming and going.

You straightened the chairs against the wall for the third time in the handoff room when at last you heard the sound of doors and footsteps. A glance up to the clock confirmed it was finally time for shift change. A few of the oncoming members shuffled in wordlessly while others gave you a quick nod of acknowledgment.

You gave Jason a friendly wave when he came through the door, and he flashed a quick smile back at you. He was probably more privy to the extent of your connection with Joel than anyone else. He’d been there that day at the market, eyeing yours and Joel’s hands clasped together during your panic attack. He’d never brought up that day to you, for which you were incredibly grateful, and it was in line with his general disposition.

He was one of the few people you’d recognized as someone Joel respected and cared about what they had to say. At first you thought it was because Jason was a sort of boss or manager with patrol shifts and personnel, but you quickly realized it was because they held a mutual respect for one another.

Jason never sought out more interaction than was necessary. Never pried. Just focused on whatever task was at hand and minded his business. He was a bit of Tommy and Joel combined, when you considered him. Not overly friendly but had a warmth in his eyes and smile. When he would occasionally ask how you were doing, you knew he genuinely wanted to know and wasn’t just asking to be polite.

You gathered up your things as you readied for Joel’s arrival. You picked up Tommy’s coat to put over the more fitted one Maria had found for you. Her balmy insistence at Tommy’s behest that you keep his jacket permanently still made you smile. You were looking over the jacket with fondness when a newer acquaintance appeared at your side.

“Hello, hello, and hello again,” Nathan purled. His toothy grin went right along with his loose, overly familiar communication style.

“Hi, Nathan,” you greeted in a short snip.

“It’s Nate, babe. C’mon, what’s it gonna take for you to call me Nate instead of being so formal?” he teased.

Nathan had been seeking you out more frequently with an exponential, energized interest each time. He was just an overenthusiastic nuisance at first, but his cocky youth had made him more brazen than usual this past week. It was never aggressive or hostile, but you didn’t enjoy the interactions. There was a clear shift in him around a week ago, and it was either an inability to recognize or a refusal to acknowledge on his part that his behavior was veering from plucky into pushy.

“Fine. Nate,” you quip.

“Atta girl,” he hooted. “Now how about you let me take you to the Tipsy Bison sometime? Get to know each other a little better, huh?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, and your stomach started to tighten.

“No th-thank you,” you decline, cursing your stammer for ruining the firm delivery.

“Acting all shy, huh? You don’t have to keep playing so hard to get, sugar. It was sexy at first, sure, but I think we’re past that by now, don’t you?” His arrogant toying of the words dripped from his tongue like a rotten pour of molasses.

Your fingers tightened around Tommy’s jacket in your hands as you felt yourself freeze up at Nathan’s advances. A molten heat spread across your chest and cheeks, and you worked to get your tongue functional again so you could tell Nathan to leave you alone.

Breathe breathe breathe breathe breathe.

Some of your fingers started to cramp and twitch with how tightly you were gripping the jacket. Nathan’s eyes swept lazily across your face in a way that had you wanting to bolt.

It’s okay there’s people around–you’re okay–just breathe breathe breathe–Joel will be here soon—

Nathan’s tongue drew across his bottom lip with a languid pass, and you felt like you might throw up.

It’s okay you’re okay it’s okay– Jason is at that table nearby–you’re okay— nothing’s going to happen– it’s okay

“Damn, you’re pretty when you blush,” he muttered, tilting his head in admiration and skimming his knuckles across your cheek. You made a noise of horror and rejection that you’d intended to come out as a “DON’T TOUCH ME,” but it got stuck in your throat.

“Leave her be, Campbell,” Jason cautioned from across the room.

“What? Can’t a gentlemen help a lady into her coat?” Nathan sneered at him. Without asking, he yanked Tommy’s coat from you and straightened it out with a jerk as if to assist you into it. You flinched at the abrupt motion after being frozen from his unwanted contact to your face.

Your breathing was picking up to an audible push and pull from your lungs. You were struggling to concentrate on breathing evenly with Nathan so close to you and being so insolent. You felt yourself become wholly petrified of what he was going to do next and if there was going to be anything you could do to stop him. “I-I don’t. No. No,” you stutter.

“You don’t know? You don’t know what?” Nathan questioned, again either willfully or ignorantly overlooking your meaning and visible distress.

“Campbell, goddammit,” Jason snapped, sounding a little closer than before.

You shrunk away from Nathan who had started to approach you with the jacket opened. You couldn’t discern if his enthusiasm was in bad faith or not. Your lip was trembling by the time you turned your face away from him and dropped your eyes to the ground. His steps were closing the gap between you quickly even though you had taken several steps backward, and your last ditch effort to make him stop was to put your hands up in a plea for him to stop.

Before Jason could round the table and intervene, Joel’s foot slammed into the back of Nathan’s knee and buckled him to the ground in a brutal drop. You jumped back at the unceremonious appearance but felt relief erupt in your gut.

“What the FUCK, man?!” Nathan bellowed. He grabbed at his leg in a crumpled heap, but Joel callously stepped over him and snatched Tommy’s jacket back. He lobbed it onto a nearby chair before meeting your eyes. He was zeroed onto you and rushed to cradle your face in his hands.

“This asshole hurt you?” Joel demanded with a stormy look. His eyes darted over you as though he was assessing the possibility himself before you could confirm or deny. You shook your head side to side in quick snaps, feeling jumpy with the rush of adrenaline coursing through you.

When Nathan made the novice mistake of trying to get up from the floor, Joel was quick to hand out a souvenir for your brash admirer’s serious lapse in judgment. Joel dropped his hands from your face and connected the sole of his boot squarely into Nathan’s chest with a hard drive, sending the recipient hurtling across the room. The panicked expression on Nathan’s face and his fruitless gasps for air indicated Joel had knocked the wind out of him.

“Turn around for a minute, honey, and close your ears, okay?” Joel requested softly. He cupped his hand around your shoulder and gave a small squeeze before sliding some of your more wily strands of hair behind your ear. It was a stark contrast to the crippling display of violence he had just exerted, but it was consistent with the rest of this whirlwind of a shitshow.

You yielded to Joel’s request and pivoted away from the scene with your fingers plugged into your ears. Your breaths were coming more steady now, and Joel’s reassuring rub between your shoulder blades brought you back to sanity.

You waited quietly, focusing on the comforting heat from Joel’s hands on your body. It wasn’t more than 20 seconds when a chair slamming into the one just off to your side pulled you out of your dutiful obliviousness. You could hear Joel’s menacing growl before you even turned back around.

“–outta your fuckin’ mind. You’ll be shitting out teeth for the next week when I knock ‘em down your fuckin’ throat if ever you try that shit again.”

“Okay, man! Jesus, okay! I’m s-sorry, man! I didn’t know she was your girl!” Nathan’s puny groveling almost made you feel guilty. Almost.

He sounded terrified, and for good reason. Joel outsized him by leaps and bounds, and the anger fueling his dealings was nothing but bad news for Nathan. You tucked your head down at an angle as you turned to see the altercation.

Nathan’s upper half hovered over the floor, swaying only with the movement of Joel’s hand where it was firmly locked onto Nathan’s collar. Joel’s free hand was balled into a fist and ready to dole out as many souvenirs as Nathan needed to remember and comply with the expectations regarding his interactions with you. He coughed, still trying to catch his breath. His left eye was starting to swell, and the skin around it was reddening with damage. A few drips of blood were slithering down his chin, and upon second glance you could see his entire mouth was awash in blood.

“Alright, Joel, that’s enough. You’ve made your point,” Jason interrupted.

“Not done yet,” Joel bit out.

With that he turned towards you, something of a sheepish smirk on his face when he saw you were no longer in your bubble, and dragged Nathan across the floor before dropping him at your feet.

“Apologize,” Joel snapped down at him.

Jason was muttering something to himself behind Joel’s back and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. Joel clearly wasn’t going to let this go until Nathan satisfied all the stipulations of his clemency.

Everyone had huddled to get a closer look, and not a single soul attempted to mediate the situation, other than Jason’s half-hearted attempt just now. It was then you realized this entire room full of people didn’t want to risk running afoul of Joel. There would be no hesitation on his part in allocating “souvenirs”for anyone interested in testing his patience when it came to your safety and comfort.

“Make it good, dumbass,” Joel growled, ramming the tip of his boot into Nathan’s thigh. Nathan yelled out again in pain and clutched the spot as he swiveled to look at you. You flinched again at Joel’s physical violence against Nathan and tried to stop shaking as you stared at all the blood.

“Fuck okay! Jesus christ, I am!” he relented. “Look, I’m sorry. I’m really fucking sorry! I swear to god, I didn’t know that you and Joel were–”

Joel slapped the back of Nathan’s head impatiently. His tone was equal parts indignant and caustic when he spoke. “She’s entitled to some civility regardless of any attachment, you fuckwit. Goddamn, who the fuck agreed to let you stay in Jackson? You are about as useful to have around as a screen door on a submarine.”

You couldn’t help but sputter a laugh at Joel’s creative barb. You were so keyed up that the moment of levity was a welcomed reprieve, although fleeting. The muffled snickering around the room let you know you weren’t the only one amused by Joel and appreciative for the blip of eased tension.

Joel caught your eye and shot you a questioning smile when you laughed. “You okay now, hon?” It was verbal whiplash, going between the hostile berating directed at Nathan and tender soothing words for you. You nodded and looked down at pitiful Nathan, who launched into an edited solicitation for your pardon.

“I’m– yes, of course. You deserve it. You deserve civility. You don’t have to be his girl for me to be polite. I understand. I get it, I swear. I swear to god I’m never gonna talk to her again. I swear I’m–” he rattled off, directing his pleading back to Joel to assess if it was adequate.

“What about my jacket?” you interrupt.

“Huh?!” Nathan gasped. His eyes snapped back to yours.

“You didn’t e-even ask. Didn’t even ask-ask about it. You just, you just took it from me without asking,” you challenged right back. “You-You can’t do that. To people. It’s not– It isn’t right. You c-can’t treat m-me like th-that.”

You were nervous to be this confrontational, but Tommy’s jacket meant a lot to you. As baffling as it might have been to anyone else, Nathan taking Tommy’s jacket from you without your permission was probably the most upsetting thing he had done to you today.

“I’m sorry! I’M SORRY! Please, I’m sorry!” he begged, watching Joel from the corner of his eye in anticipation of correction for this new grievance.

“Okay. Th-Thank you,” you said. You looked up to Joel and cupped his elbow to get his full attention. “Help him up, Joel, okay?” Joel’s face softened, but you could tell he felt Nathan didn’t deserve to get off so easy.

Joel snatched Nathan up with both hands on his collar now and brought him nose to nose. Even if it was done with the intent to protect you, the verbal altercation and physical violence made your stomach turn.

“If I see you actin’ like a creep with any women around town, we will pick up right where we left off, you understand me?” he snarled.

Nathan garbled nonsense and nodded emphatically. Joel released his hold, much to Nathan’s relief, and offered one parting remark. “Now go tell Tommy he has to call up the standby to cover your patrol shift because you’re a fuckin’ dipshit.”

Nathan didn’t need to hear his assignment twice and bolted from the room.

“Point made, Joel,” Jason sighed. “You okay?” he turned to you and asked.

“Yeah, I’m-I’m good,” you reply.

“Alright, good. Now get your attack dog outta here before he gets put on leave for interpersonal workplace violence,” Jason grumbled.

You scooped up your jacket and extended your hand to Joel, wiggling your fingers in an encouraging gesture for him to meet your grasp. His remorseless expression only strengthened as he reached out and took it. Once you made it outside and started your walk home, Joel appeared regretful for at least some of his actions.

“I, uh, I know I shoulda corrected him when he said we were together, but I was so pissed off I wasn’t really thinkin’ straight,” he admitted.

“It’s okay, Joel. Really,” you assure him. You rubbed your thumb along his hand in a soothing motion.

“No, it’s just that… I don’t want you gettin’ the idea that you’re only safe so long as you, I dunno how to put it. So long as you’re attached to somebody, I guess,” he explained.

This was the first time you had ever seen Joel unsure of himself.

“I really did try to hold back. Wanted to bash his damn head into the wall. Seein’ how afraid he made you,” he muttered. “Just, not exactly too proud of myself for actin’ like that in front of you. I know it bothers you, that kinda stuff.”

“It does…” you admit, “–but, I’m not upset you stepped in.”

“You sure?” he pressed.

“Yes. Very,” you reply.

Joel let out a deep sigh of relief and gave your hand a small squeeze. You looked up at him, but his eyes stayed focused on the walk ahead. “Just wanna be sure. You’ve dealt with enough shit. Don’t need me addin’ to it,” he said.

For the second time today, Joel garnered a surprised, sputtering laugh from you. He glanced down, curious at your reaction.

“Adding to it? Like, adding to my troubles?” you balk. “You serious?”

Joel shrugged your comment off. He didn’t find it as implausible as you did. You came to a halt and waited for him to look at you before speaking.

“If I could do that for you? What you did back there? I would,” you assert with as much conviction as you could muster. “Not that you need it. But, if you did. If you needed somebody to try and, and stick up for you? I would. I would try my best.”

The line of Joel’s mouth curved ever so slightly when you squeezed his hand for emphasis. “I know you would. I know you would,” he trailed off as the two of you started walking again.

“Know you’d give ‘em hell for me, honey,” he finished.

You hugged yourself around Joel’s arm, gripping his hand all the tighter, as you walked the rest of the way home in your usual comfortable silence. The clarity it afforded your mind only produced a single thought: Know you’d give ‘em hell for me, honey … for Joel, you would.

Closing in on your second month in Jackson was the perfect time to host a celebration dinner. According to Susan, at least. “What better way to show Tommy and Maria all your progress?” she posed to you two weeks ago. In that time, she had worked you through her own little charm school curriculum and proclaimed you “ready to be co-host” to a nice meal.

It was your idea to invite Joel and Ellie, a suggestion that Susan readily gave her stamp of approval, and before you knew it you were fidgeting with the hem of your shirt in anxious wait for your guests to arrive.

You heard Joel’s leaden gait as he and Ellie walked up the front stairs, and you swung the door open before he could knock. “Wow. Host so good you don’t even hafta knock to be let in,” Joel teased.

“Hi. Welcome. Please come in,” you parrot from the dialogue you had practiced with Susan.

“You sound weird,” Ellie heckled. She scrunched her nose in amusement at your stiff imitation of the mistress of ceremonies.

“Ugh. I know,” you mumble. “Just tell Susan I sounded good, okay?”

Ellie cackled but joined forces with your hostess farce without any begging necessary from you. Joel wore his usual amused grin for the evening. “Not sure you’re ready for this, but I have a feeling Susan’s got enough experience under her belt to keep up,” he said as he handed you a glass bottle of dark brown liquid.

“Thank you for this gift. How kind.” Your wooden delivery wasn’t selling any of the warmth it was supposed to. Ellie started off down the hall, inspecting whatever doorways were open along the way, leaving you beside Joel.

“Please don’t tell me you’re gonna keep that up the whole night,” he groaned. You glared at him with put-on exacerbation as you shut the door.

“Shutup, Joel. Susan has been putting me through the, through the hanger or whatever, for the past two weeks,” you huff.

“Through the wringer,” Joel corrected with a barely contained smirk.

“Whatever. I really want to do a good job, okay?” you admit with a skittish bounce onto the balls of your feet.

“Alright, alright. We’ll play nice,” he chuckled. “And, since you’re such a gracious host ‘n all and asked what gift was delightfully bestowed upon you, that’s some of Seth’s older batch of whiskey. Good shit.”

Your cheeks warmed a bit at Joel’s apparent familiarity with hosting etiquette. You accepted his gentle attempt to steer you the right way. “Oh. Yes. Well. Thank you. I’m-I’m sure this will go with– pair well with the … with the, um–shit, I can’t remember what’s for dessert.”

Joel covered his howl of laughter with a strained cough, and you couldn’t help but giggle along with him as you scolded him. “Shutupppppp,” you groan.

“Why yes, I would love to be shown to the kitchen to greet the other guests that may have arrived and or to say hello to the other host for this evening,” Joel chortled.

You sighed and rubbed your forehead against the palm of your hand. This was going to be a complete disaster, and you can’t believe it was falling apart already after you’d put so much work into it.

“C’mon,” Joel encouraged with a quick arm around your shoulder and a gentle shake. You leaned your head against his middle before pushing off and heading down the hallway together.

Joel did his usual work of charming the pants off Susan on your behalf. You were lost on the reference he made to some television episode where the main character Lucy and her friend went to a charm school and failed miserably. Joel and Susan joked how you were leagues above Lucy and Ethel’s attempts, which didn’t make a whole lot of sense to you, but you took it as a compliment all the same.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never seen I Love Lucy,” Joel chastised.

“I’ve heard of it?” you offer.

When Joel scoffed, you swiftly reminded him that it was before his time, too, if you were remembering correctly. Ellie as always chipped in with her helpful takes and said that if it was “just the grey TV before they got colors” then it was “definitely Joel’s time.” Joel grumbled something under his breath about “pain in my ass” and “talkin’ outta the side of her mouth” at Ellie’s remarks, and you and Susan could only giggle at their banter.

“How old were you when the outbreak happened, anyway?” Ellie wondered.

You were shocked it had taken her this long to ask you such a basic question that you had prepared yourself a little bit for it. “Eight.”

Joel choked on the single finger whiskey he had poured himself. You’d only ever told him you’d been a kid on outbreak day but never got into the exact details other than escaping to safety with your parents.

“Poor Bug. Just like my daughter, not even out of elementary school,” Susan murmured softly. You shot her a sympathetic look and squeezed her arm in consolation. “But at least I’ve got you now, Bug,” she added with a squeeze back to you.

Tommy and Maria arrived a little late, and Maria owned the blame entirely. “Baby Miller makes it summertime year round,” she quipped as she freed herself of her jacket when they arrived. Apparently she’d run her head under cold water for 10 minutes straight before she felt cool enough, and then had to change clothes so she wasn’t left in damp, sweaty fabric.

Susan sat at the head of the table, and you were opposite as the cohost. Maria sat next to Susan as the “guest of honor” with Tommy to her right and your left. Joel sat across from his brother and Ellie across from Maria.

“What a quaint gathering,” you comment stiffly, hoping you remembered the line correctly. Joel choked on his water but straightened up when you shot him a look.

“Oh. Yes. Wow. Yes, quaint. Susan, you’ve been making an impression on her, I see,” Maria chuckled with a wide-eyed grin.

“Bug has done so well. I’m so proud of her. And Joel can tell you all about how she’s doing, too. Can’t you, Joel?” Susan prompted.

You couldn’t help the nervous face that met Joel’s gaze, but you really weren’t sure if he would give you a rave review. Not that it mattered. But still, it would feel nice to know he thought you were meeting some sort of unspoken expectations.

“Best company in Jackson, in my opinion,” he said softly, never tearing his eyes from you. Your watery smile made him grin in return, and you only looked away when Tommy cleared his throat.

“Proud’a you, sweetheart. Come from a hard place, no doubt about that. Made lotsa strides since you got here, and we can all see that,” Tommy said.

You really had to hold yourself back from getting emotional now. Tommy seemed to detect your precarious emotional state and rubbed your hand for encouragement. You gave him a double scrunch of your fingers against his hand in return, and he offered up his crinkly smile you loved so much.

“Really. It’s so great to see you out and about. And helping out with patrols, too,” Maria added.

Tommy shot Joel a devilish look when Maria brought up your patrol job. “Yeah, heard a lotta people talkin’ just the other day about your help up there. Makin’ quite the impression.”

Joel didn’t look up from his plate and opted to just roll his eyes at Tommy’s nettling. Oblivious to what Tommy was actually referencing, Susan clapped her hands together with an enthusiastic expression. “Bug, how wonderful!”

“Probably just being nice,” you mumble before staring off and taking a few sips of your water.

“No no, believe me, there was enough hullabaloo about’cha that I can guarantee you’ve carved out a little piece of Jackson for yourself that people aren’t soon’ta forget,” Tommy chuckled, never tearing his eyes away from his increasingly irritated brother.

You chewed on your lip thinking about Joel’s run-in with Nathan. You wondered how many people knew about it now and what they thought of you and the role you played in it. You felt Joel’s foot make swift contact with Tommy’s shin underneath the table, who sat up straighter immediately and glanced your way. Apparently Joel had taken note of your dour mood and wasn’t keen on the effect Tommy’s words seemed to be having on you.

“Ah, really, though.” Tommy cleared his throat and flushed a little. “Might not feel like you’re doin’ a whole lot up there, but it does make a difference. Things been smoother since you started,” he said in earnest.

You thanked Tommy for the compliment but adjusted yourself in your seat awkwardly. All the built up nervous energy inside you was demanding to be channeled somewhere. Susan gave you an encouraging wink, mistaking your fidgeting as feeling bashful at all the good things everyone had to say about you.

“Can I get a thing, no– Can I get anyone anything?” you fumble, trying to shift back into co-host mode.

“I’d actually take some ice water if you don’t mind,” Maria said. She had peeled off her long-sleeved shirt and was down to the tanktop she’d worn underneath it. “Just another round of my own personal summertime.”

“Oh, of course. Let me just– I’ll be right back,” you announce, standing and heading to the kitchen. You were just glad the first real request of the night was so manageable. You emerged with a pitcher of ice water and a new glass for Maria that had extra ice in it.

You felt bad that she had been dealing with these unpleasant bouts of heat for at least several weeks. At least as far back as when you’d overheard her and Tommy’s conversation through their kitchen window after you’d arrived. You sympathized with her recurrent discomfort and made a mental note to ask Susan later if that sort of thing would go away once she had the baby.

“Ugh, perfect. Thank you,” Maria said when you made your way back to the table.

“No problem.” You picked up her new glass and began filling it with ice cold water. The freezing bite against your fingers helped to steady your hand as you worked. You were trying your best to not overthink this and get nervous, but you really wanted to do a good job for Susan.

“So what, you just get like internal lava from the baby or something?” Ellie wondered.

Maria and Susan both laughed at the description but didn’t deny its accuracy. “Something like that,” Maria agreed.

“Ugh gross. That sucks. At least this winter keeps dragging on, I guess. Somebody said the other day at school that it’s normally a little warmer by now. But that’s good for you, right? Even some snow still coming every now and then?” Ellie reasoned.

You felt a sprout of confidence blooming in your chest, and you took up on it immediately before it went away.

“Yeah, but that just means Maria has to talk Tommy out of filling the bathtub with snow to help her cool off. Can’t just hang out of your kitchen window every time.” You laugh a little at your tongue-in-cheek contribution as you go between Maria and Tommy to fill his glass with water next.

You feel them both still on either side of you, and you glance at Tommy in search of a reason. He had a confused, sad look that you couldn’t understand until you realized what you’d said. You sat the water pitcher on the table without filling Tommy’s glass and reflexively crossed your arms over your lower belly in subconscious effort to self-soothe.

“How do you know about that?” Maria asked behind you.

You took a big step back and removed yourself from between their chairs. “I-I …” you stammer. “Shit.”

“How much did you hear?” she quickly followed up. She knew. It was all over her face. Tommy’s, too. They knew you had eavesdropped on their conversation. Their private conversation about you and how bad off you were. Something you were never meant to hear and had no right listening in on.

“Something wrong?” Susan asked with a confused frown.

“Yeah, what the hell? Why’d everybody get so weird all the sudden?” Ellie chipped in, helpful as ever.

You opened your mouth a few times, but your tongue felt heavy and unwieldy. You didn’t know what to say, so instead you turned on your heel and abruptly exited the room, climbing the stairs two at a time until you made it to your room and locked the door.

“You fucking idiot,” you snap at yourself with a soft headbutt against the back of your door as you leaned into it. You bury your face in your hands and fall into your mattress. It was bad enough that your instigation of Joel and Nathan’s fight had been a topic of vague discussion over dinner, and now you had just outed yourself as an eavesdropper and a liar.

You could only imagine the conversation downstairs with Tommy and Maria letting everyone else know you had apparently spied on them and made yourself privy to their private conversations. Everyone would discover you couldn’t be trusted. Your mind was hurtling towards that ever present and endless expanse of panic that was apparently going to be rooted in you forever.

You shuffled around your room in search of a rubber band and quickly dragged the first one you found over your wrist. You pulled the band taut and released it with a stinging snap against the softest part of your wrist. The faded scars from so many hours in restraints left little pale patches as the surrounding skin welted up around them with the repeated, calming snaps of the rubber band.

A hiss of satisfaction hummed from your throat at the grounding sensation it gave you. A soft knock on your door tore you from your self-soothing. “Uh, just a minute. I’m– I don’t think I’m coming back down Susan, I’m sorry,” you call out.

“Not Susan, but I’ll give you another guess,” Joel’s muffled voice came from the other side of the door.

You sighed and walked across your room but only stared at the doorknob after a few steps.

“Gimme two minutes, and I’ll leave you alone after that,” he bargained.

It was laughable that he’d think you didn’t want to see him. You wanted nothing more than for him to be right beside you. You were afraid of the possibility that he was going to look at you differently now after learning that you were a liar and a sneak.

You reluctantly opened the door for him. You close and lock it after he stepped inside your bedroom. You kept your eyes downcast and settled back into your bed, curling up into yourself on your side without a word. You couldn’t take a look of disappointment or rejection from him right now. It would absolutely gut you.

Joel approached slowly before asking your permission to sit on the bed next to you. You gave a short sound of approval and felt the mattress beneath you sink down with Joel’s weight. You stared at the wall in front of you, hyper aware of Joel’s measured, calm breaths behind you.

“Your mirror’s covered,” he noted.

You let out a resigned sigh. Of course he’d notice. Susan had taken the coverings off all the mirrors downstairs in preparation for tonight’s dinner, but you hadn’t considered any of the upstairs ones.

“Yeah. Too bright. In the mornings. Lots of light,” you lie.

“You’re gonna have to pick between not lookin’ at me and not tellin’ me the truth, ‘cause I’m not gonna put up with both,” Joel said with firm candor.

You stirred at his provocation and rolled over. Joel sat facing forward, still taking in your decorative alterations. When he looked down at you, you instantly covered your face with your arms. It was too much.

“Quit it,” he urged gently, brushing his fingers across your lower arm. You dropped your safeguard and willed yourself to maintain eye contact.

“Are they going to kick me out?” you sniffle.

“You seriously think that?” Joel shot back. “You think even if that was the case me’n Ellie would just stand by? Or Susan?” Your lack of understanding at the extent of how much people cared for you had clearly struck a chord.

“No,” you mutter. You clear the lump in your throat with a few swallows.

“Exactly. So you can stay up here and take yourself outta the equation of your own life, or you can come back down with me and have a little liquid courage and enjoy the rest of this dinner,” he said.

When you didn’t answer after a few moments, Joel doubled down. “So what’s it gonna be? You gonna hole yourself up here? Or are you gonna pull yourself together and come back downstairs with me?”

He wasn’t being unkind, you knew that. It was the truth of your options, and he wasn’t going to let you skirt the issue by forming your own bastardized version of events where everyone hated you and you weren’t capable of doing hard things.

“I guess… I guess staying up here won’t do much. For showing how I’m doing better since I got to Jackson,” you reason. “And I’ll probably just drive myself crazy up here, alone with my th-thoughts.”

“Your call, honey,” Joel reminded you. He meant it. You knew if you really decided to just have a pity party for yourself upstairs, he wouldn’t stop you, and he wouldn’t chastise you over it either.

You sat up and poked Joel’s thigh, prompting him to stand. When you swung your legs over the edge of the bed, you looked up to see Joel’s extended hand waiting for you. He smirked and wiggled his fingers, mimicking the gesture you gave him after his altercation with Nathan. You huffed a small laugh and knocked his hand away in feigned annoyance before quickly grabbing it back up.

“Oh, one more thing.”

You shot him a curious look. “What?”

“This?” he said, gingerly wrapping his hand around your wrist where you’d snapped the rubber band. “You’re not doin’ this anymore.”

Your cheeks burned. You’d already forgotten about it, too distracted to think about hiding it. “Joel, it’s not– I just do it to help me–”

“No.” He cut you off without hesitation. “You aren’t gonna do it anymore. You’re gonna find somethin’ else to help calm you down. You come to me in the meantime while we’re figurin’ out what you can do to replace that. Don’t care if it’s the middle of the night. You come see me. Is that understood?”

You gulped at the frankly enthralling way Joel commanded you to not mistreat your body, even if you only did it because it brought momentary calm. He raised his eyebrow in a persuasive, demanding motion, waiting for your acknowledgement.

“Okay,” you promise. You hug his arm for a moment and don’t pull away when he sweeps his knuckles down your back in a single, delicate pass.

“Let’s get goin’,” he says, and you think just maybe there was a hint of reluctance in his voice at the mention of ending the moment and going back downstairs with other people instead of staying up here alone.

You made it to the bottom of the stairs and were sad to let go of your hold of his warm, comforting hand, but you really didn’t want to reemerge with such a pointed, suggestive display before you could even smooth things over from your last faux pas.

“Ready?” Joel murmured lowly so everyone in the next room over couldn’t hear.

“Yeah, I’m ready,” you whisper back.

And you were. You could do hard things. You could handle the awkward social situation you had created. No one was going to send you away. You weren’t going to have to fend for yourself. No one blamed you for Joel’s choices in dealing with Nathan. You weren’t somebody that stirred up trouble. You were just learning how to be yourself again, and it had been a long time since you were yourself.

The "WHAT TTTOOOWWWNNNNN?!" side of Joel makes my pussy bottom out, sorry not sorry. If only it wouldn't be too upsetting for Feral Woman® to witness Joel get more violent, we might have seen Nathan get all of the ass whooping he deserved. Oh well. We'll just have to settle for what we can get, I suppose.

Also, I just know Susan would give Joel a run for his money if anyone actually tried to kick Feral Woman® out of Jackson. Some true mama bear shit 100%.

As always, ty ty ty for reading and for commenting/sharing/reblogging my work!

Catch ya later, ♥Puddles♥

#fic: feral woman #fw #joel miller #joel miller x reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #tlou fic #tlou fanfiction #the last of us

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writingshushf1 · 1 year

Text

THE LONELIEST

Summary: You'll be the saddest part of me. A part of me that will never be mine. It's obvious. Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

Rating: +16

Warnings: angst? breakup? losing someone

Word count: 3.7k

Note: this was an old pierre gasly fic that i wrote last year for a friend- however since i don't actually like writing for him (and the plot doen't fit for him AT ALL) i rewrote some details and now here it is! I did it with george because it matched him? i guess and to change a bit from the usual either mick or lewis requests. MAY HAVE SOME MISTAKES on writing

masterlist

It was supposed to be just one night, a single dawn of fun and silly mistakes, but I was wrong. And life is never that easy.

Monaco, August 2022.

The view was breathtaking, clearly worth every penny spent. Strolling through Port Hercule at night was breathtaking, the yachts lit up, people partying and living in every possible luxury. I admit, I was a little jealous, I really wanted to be in the middle of it all.

It seemed very well that fate really wanted me to make the most of it, because within minutes a man taller than me came closer. At first I was apprehensive and turned away slightly, until he began to speak.

"A friend of mine saw that you were alone here, taking pictures of the place and walking. Um..." The man looked me up and down. "Invitation from her, if you want, you can join us." He smiled at me, clearly the stranger possessed the most beautiful smile I have ever seen.

For a few seconds, I thought about the proposal, because they were strangers and I didn't know what they wanted to do with me, but you only live once. Before agreeing, I sent the location to my friend. If I didn't answer within 3 hours, she could get desperate and call the police.

"Sure. We can go, yes." He held out his hand to me, reluctantly, I held it and let him guide me around the place. "I don't know your name yet."

"George Russell. You?"

"Y/n."

"Interesting name, where are you from?" Russell was trying to initiate some conversation until we got to the boat. It was cute, like he was really interested in what I was going to talk about.

I answered, seeing him crack a smile. "However, these last few years I am hopping around several countries because of my job."

When we entered the luxurious place, I could no longer hear him properly, the conversations and loud music filled our surroundings, he just smiled and dragged me to the small bar set up.

"On the house, whatever drink you want." He murmured over my ear. This distance was too dangerous.

Hours later, I woke up crossed in my hotel bed. I had an unbearable hangover, but I was not going to let it ruin my day. Again, I was exploring the place to find out something to do. I walked around the city, hoping to bump into the pair of clear eyes that had kept me company on the yacht. Since it was a Sunday, brunch would be my choice for my first meal of the day, so I walked around looking for a place to eat. After a while I found a small, cozy restaurant and the first person I see when I enter is him. My heart races and I seem to hold my breath involuntarily.

"Y/n!" He calls out loudly, breaking my trance, "I thought I would never see you again."

"I didn't think so either, not least because we were too crazy yesterday to be rational and take each other's number." I laughed lightly.

"So… This is Alex Albon and Mick Schumacher, two very close friends of mine." I greeted them both. "So... Tonight we're going out to a nightclub, if you'd like to join us, just let me know the hotel you're in and I'll come pick you up."

"You really enjoyed my company!" I said, cracking a smile immediately afterwards.

"What can I do? You're the life of the party, honey."

...

Okay, I was on the verge of a breakdown and it was about one piece of clothing. It had been 30 minutes and I couldn't decide between two dresses. It was almost time for me to go down to the hotel lobby and I was still standing there in just my underwear looking at both. My cell phone ringing was the highlight, it was him and he was probably already waiting for me downstairs. Out of desperation I grabbed the simplest but most low-cut black dress.

The elevator took ages - actually, seconds - to drop me off on the first floor and I ran to meet him.

"Wow, you're a sight for sore eyes, someone was definitely inspired today" He said as I got closer to him, I just rolled my eyes and he laughed, opening the car door for me.

Arriving at the club, I was clearly feeling out of place, the people were extremely rich and in the middle of them, there was I. We went to the VIP area and soon I was already with a glass of an expensive drink in hand and making small talk with George. He had the best subjects to hold me in conversation while he managed to flirt shamelessly and I was completely falling for it. The boys and his other friends were dancing with girls - either his girlfriends or random girls, while he was trying to be as sexy as possible, trying to impress me. And he was.

"Let's dance." I spoke softly to him, holding his hand and pulling him into the group of people.

Unholy, by Sam Smith was playing and at that moment I was not me, not even a little bit, it seemed that all the shame and lack of courage had been taken from me. The British had already understood what I was doing, so he rested his firm hands on my waist as I danced shamelessly, moving my body against him. He was enjoying what I was doing, his breaths getting heavier and closer to my ear, until his face was pressed against the back of my neck. Thank God it was dark and no one could see how we were grinding into each other

"Oh God, doll..." He murmured, which left me with my cheeks boiling with embarrassment, however it was not the moment. "I want to kiss you so badly."

"Kiss me then."

In a matter of seconds, I felt my body being turned around and his lips were against mine. I couldn't help myself, I ran my hands over his body, from his chest to the back of his neck. He responded in the same way, his hands were not discreet and it didn't matter who saw us like that. The kiss was hot and desperate, as if he had wanted it since he first saw me. When we parted for some air, his lips were a purplish shade of purple from my lipstick, which made me laugh softly at the forgotten detail.

"Do you want to get out of here? Where I live there is plenty of room for one more person to spend the night there." His hand was already strong on my waist, as a sign of dominance and it made a puddle form inside my panties

"Okay."

We could have reached where he lived in 5 minutes, but with the amount of distractions we had on the way, it ended up lasting 20. We can say that a few kisses and touches were exchanged in the meantime.

Russell’s desire was gigantic, for the moment I closed the door, I was picked up and seconds later my back was against the bed. I took off my heels anyway and he was soon on top of me.

"That dress clearly had an effect on me." That was the last thing he said before he kissed me again.

...

I opened my eyes slowly, the darkness of the room that was not mine confused me for a few seconds until I remembered where I really was. It was at that moment that I felt hands around my naked waist and George sleeping peacefully beside me. My first reaction was not to move, he looked so calm that I turned my body to lie against his chest, just to enjoy the moment of peace, but happiness doesn't last long...

"Good morning." His voice was half hoarse and in a low tone. Shit, why so hot?

"Good morning." I sighed loudly and stood, completely forgetting that I was only in my panties until he groaned at me, my cheeks blushing with embarrassment.

"Vision of paradise." I said unashamedly.

I didn't answer, just smiled shyly and quickly got dressed. Soon I was brushing my teeth and he didn't even get out of bed. When I was ready to leave, the British got up in just his underwear.

"Why are you going already? We had such a good night..." Indeed, the night had been one of the best I had ever had.

"Because..." There was no reason, we didn't work together, we don't even have any previous relationship or that would cause future problems. "There is no reason. I thought we were just a one-night stand."

"It doesn't have to be a one-night stand. If you want." He said in a lower tone, as if it were our secret. "I'm willing to try." His hands passed around my waist, pulling my body against his and away from the door.

I thought for a moment before answering. My previous relationships had been terrible and no one seemed to be the person. I hardly knew him, didn't know where he worked, just that he was very rich, his hobbies...

"We can try." And so, I made the most painful mistake of my life.

...

I was wearing one of his shirts, while he was ordering our breakfast - they looked so big on me. He was tall so his outfits were bigger. I sat on the window ledge, looking out at the beautiful scenery that could be seen from there. As soon as he returned with two relatively large boxes, I smiled.

"Don't go anywhere, I'll tidy up and we can eat with the beautiful view on the balcony." My heart melted for a few seconds, how cute could he be? Clearly my view of him had changed in a matter of minutes.

Neither of us shared a word while we were eating, but in our defense, the food was wonderful, which drew a few satisfied sighs. Still, in order to make conversation and find out about his personal life, I made conversation again.

"George?"

"Huh?"

"What do you work in? So far I haven't asked you or even googled you to find out if you are some big tycoon who can rent an apartment in Monaco." The tone was not one of malice, just curiosity. "I know at times, you had people from afar taking pictures of you, but I thought I just thought you were handsome. It's just that I have this thing… I mean, which job is so good that you live here." I cracked an amused smile, crossing my legs over his.

"Formula 1 driver. Currently at Mercedes." He replied as if it was the most common job in the world, yet at the same moment I knocked over the piece of cronut that was in my hands. "I thought you already knew!"

"No! I didn't know? Look... I only know the most famous ones that have passed through the sport... Senna, Schumacher, Prost...Lauda. I had no idea who was currently in the sport." He just laughed at my surprise. "That's why people keep watching you from afar! By God! What if they saw us leaving the club last night? What could that do to your reputation?"

"Honey. Calm down, it's not that dramatic." He used his free hand to place it over my cheek. "They always speculate about our lives and I couldn't care less. If we are available to try, I think more about you. You're not used to living in this life of cameras and constant attention."

"I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"For you? Yes."

...

Two weeks went by and there I was, watching from my cell phone, the Dutch Grand Prix, all for George Russell. Officially we were still nothing, however, under the surface. He was my boyfriend.

Something so strange to say, as much as I know he is the right person. At that moment I was at the airport, ready to catch a plane to the province of Monza, so that we could spend a week together - more like post-practice on Friday, post-qualifying on Saturday and post-race on Sunday, because I cannot yet afford to quit my job to live as a fan of my boyfriend.

That's when the inevitable problems started to happen.

I arrived exhausted in Monza and went straight to the hotel, didn't answer messages and didn't even look at my cell phone properly. I was so tired that I wanted my bed. Russell was extremely worried and almost considered leaving the Netherlands on Monday because of my disappearance. On Tuesday, he came to my hotel room, but I was constantly in meetings and doing work, which did not please him, because he missed my company. That day he apologized. On Wednesday I got some time off, but he had already arranged to leave with his friends. There was nothing to apologize for. By Thursday he was already involved with the race that would happen on Sunday and I continued working. We hardly spoke to each other.

On Friday, after the free training sessions, we had a dinner scheduled in a fancy restaurant and we managed to go. I can say that it was the best night, because we didn't sleep afterwards, we just killed our homesickness with lots of wine, conversation and sex.

Saturday was qualifying and I was there. Sunday, third place. I was proud of him and we celebrated together with the others. I felt out of place with the other girlfriends and partners of the pilots, for the most part they were all so Chic, I felt left out, because I was a simple girl who, with the effort of my family that helped me get to a renowned company, was still not enough.

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday were ordinary, goodbye is always painful, I would only see him in a few weeks. One of those nights around the weekend, he said I love you and I said it back, hanging up the phone before I could hear his answer.

We haven't seen each other in person for over a month. He travels to one side of the world. I am in a different city, we try to reconcile time zones and catch planes, but our routine is dull and it is upsetting for both of us. What keeps us positive is the end of the season and finally we can spend weeks and weeks together. Four more races and this year is over.

Each time more time passed, the pain in my chest of longing increased, because we were amazing together, love seemed to overflow, yet the pain of not having him by my side hurt me and I know that it also affected him mentally. A painful truth seemed to grow in my chest. I was trying to knead it, but it was getting bigger and bigger.

The agony often took over my body. The fear of him never coming home, what if he found someone better? What if I gave up this crazy life he was living? If I wanted more security?

Maybe this was not the time to be together.

And that only proved to be true around Christmas. Our first fight, over something as simple as where we were going to spend the holiday together, ended in both sides crying and endless apologies. Our temper was still the biggest problem for both of us, even if our love was big and beautiful. Explosiveness to end everything in a matter of seconds. We were in a weird mood for 3 days after that. The decision was to spend Christmas each with their own family, the relationship was too new for us to go out showing off to each other and this was right, newly blossoming feelings. I spent the holiday period sending pictures and messages, getting minimal responses, but it was expected.

After that, the relationship was still very good, we couldn't see each other on some weekends, the other turned to love and sex, yet there was an elephant in our midst that no one wanted to mention. The start of racing in 2023. He was now in a relatively better car than the previous one and that would demand even more of him.

We avoided the subject until the start of pre-season testing. His mental health was worse than usual, but he was happy with the results, I was... My family had disassembled, losing someone was never easy, much less when your job also blew up in less than a week after that, besides being on the other side of the world with no prediction of returning home. Everything had piled up and was taking too much out of both of us.

He was trying to be everything, only my life was meaningless and no matter how much I returned the love, I knew it was still not enough for his big, passionate heart.

We needed to talk.

...

The second day he was home, my body was exhausted from looking out for work so as not to leave him paying for it alone, even though he didn't mind. As soon as I arrived, I ran to his lap, where I hid my face and let him comfort me.

"We need to talk."

"What's it about, kitten?"

"We... We are distant. Not physically, but mentally... It seems that our lives don't want to share with each other. I need to go back to my country and I don't know if I can get back here anytime soon, while you... You are in an amazing team, living a dream of winning podiums... To be adored by new people. They are not working out."

"Love..."

"I am serious. Haven't you noticed that every time our lives come into our relationship, either we fight and come out crying or one of us needs to be consoling the other? It's never about enjoying each other's lives, participating, feeling at home. It is about working like convicts and maybe on the weekend getting together for sex sessions and small talk over a bottle of wine. Not that I don't love this and don't love you.”

"However?"

"Yet this is killing me, and it's killing you, too. You're 25 years old, baby. At the peak of your career and so soon you don't want to retire and stop the momentum. I need some calm right now, my family is destroyed. You are married to your career, which I don't think is completely wrong for your environment, but our visions of the future will not fit together. At least not today."

I watched him swallow hard, his face turned to the side, tears timidly streaming down his face. Without even hesitating, I run both hands over his face, wiping them away.

"I don't want to break up with you. It's the first time I've ever been completely given over to someone. I have never, ever really devoted myself as much, felt as loved as you have made me feel, honey. " The crying voice brought pain to my heart and I wanted to give up halfway through. "Don't do this to me."

"You know I don't want to either." I murmured, ignoring my own tears and leaning my forehead against his. "But it's the best thing for both of us. How many times have we cried this week? Over things within our relationship that we can't fix. They're incorrigible because they're not up for us to change, George."

"I know. I know all this, but I don't want to lose you."

"You won't lose me. I promise you. One day we will meet again."

"How do you know?"

"Because our lives aren't on the same page. One day we'll have our right moment and we'll make everything we couldn't experience in these months count. I promise."

"I will never forget you.

"Then let's make this night unforgettable."

And we had sex that night. We cried together, packed my bags, and cried some more. And in a few hours I was at the airport to return to my country. He didn't want to let me go, his hug was so strong and his kisses were endless, they were so desperate but at the same time they carried so much love. Everyone always said that goodbyes were always hard, even more so for young loves.

"This here. It stays with you. When you think it's our time, you give it back to me." He took it off one of his favorite necklaces, placing it around my neck.

I was unresponsive for a few seconds, just enjoying the touch of his hands. "I will always love you, Russ."

"And I will always love you too, love. See you someday?"

"See you someday."

So we had our last kiss, intense, with his tongue next to mine, bodies glued together, and then a strong and tearful hug, and minutes later I was walking into the plane, my face swollen. I couldn't stop crying and thinking how incredible that love had been.

Thinking about the future with him, with the possibility of meeting him again made me cry even more, because I had the courage to leave him, however I knew it was the best, I didn't want us to end with just hate and no love.

When you love, sometimes you have to make the hardest choice.

...

George (pov)

I was sitting on my bed. I didn't know that love could hurt so much as it did right now.

"She was that person who messed everything up and yet, fixed everything at the same time. I was no longer Russell who did things without thinking. She loved me so much and I loved her so much. Why does everything that is good have such a painful end? It was just like a novel... Which was supposed to be beautiful, the kind that annoys people with all the love the main characters have, but…” Lewis just listened to me, with a hand on my shoulder. He squeezed slightly, to show that he understood what I meant.

"The greatest loves don't last forever, friend." He murmured, giving me a hug where I let myself cry.

#george russell #george russel imagine #george russel x reader #george russell x y/n #george russell x you #george russell fluff #george russell angst #george russell fanfiction #george russell one shot #f1 fanfiction #f1 rpf #f1 one shot #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #george russell blurb #rus63

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