#ironically the very opposite of losing control

[sytycdinternational]

SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE USA SEASON 18 // Easton Magliarditi / 19 / Contemporary / Auditions #1

#SYTYCD #so you think you can dance #Easton Magliarditi #Contemporary #Teddy Swims #Lose Control #ironically the very opposite of losing control #body control #US18A #auditions

[vasito-de-leche]

Hiii! I hope you’re doing well!! I’m just wondering if i could request some yandere Forget Me Not headcannons? If not, some general romantic hcs would be fine!

That said, don’t overwork yourself and feel free to decline this if you feel like it!

;R1999 FORGET ME NOT - Yandere Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons about Forget Me Not as a Yandere.

I am doing well, ty for asking! and ty for the yandere request, I love writing this type of stuff <3

warning for yandere content and everything it entails. as well as self-harm and suicide themes

Forget Me Not as a Yandere would be pretty standard, I think─at least from the beginning.

I want to say that his lack of experience and proper, healthy examples when it comes to relationships and interpersonal skills is the basis of his Yandere profile: he's hindered by even more twisted impulses and intrusive thoughts, and thus would cling even HARDER to his self-imposed restraints because the stakes are higher now. The consequences would be even more severe should he lose control.

From an outsider's point of view, perhaps he appears to be meaner than usual, there's more bite behind his words as opposed to his elegant way of serving backhanded compliments. While those who spend more time with him would notice that he's unbelievably tense and high-strung. Essentially, it's the same fight between indulgence and restraint that I've been portraying in previous FMN posts, only ramped up to 200%.

The thing about Forget Me Not as a Yandere is that he would be extremely malleable and reactive to his darling. He's so very easy to influence, for better and for worse─the attention he pays to every single detail about you, your habits, your gestures and every little "tell", borders on predatory. It's very ironic, the way he can't understand his own feelings nor thoughts but he actually can read you crystal clear, that he may know you better than you know yourself. The dynamic of your relationship would be determined in your first interactions with him, and it AAAAAALL depends on you. But it's not as binary as who gets to be the "dominant" party and who gets to be the "submissive" party!

When I say Forget Me Not is malleable, I mean it.

In the context of entering a relationship with him, yes, there is the chance that, if you show any signs of "submission" (a more timid and meek personality) Forget Me Not will take advantage of it to the fullest─either through force, coercion or manipulation. We all know he's not below playing dirty and acting to get what he wants, after all. And there is also the chance that, if you show the opposite (a more stubborn and combative personality, to go against him whenever possible) that he will meet you with as much vitriol as you show him, or that he will become even more obsessed with making you submit to him, to blur both love and hatred together as mentioned before. You know, all these classics traits in Yandere content!

But the secret third option is that, if you play your cards right, he will be at your absolute mercy as well.

You can play the exact same mind games he plays and have him eating out of the palm of your hand. After all, he's just looking for ANY excuse and justification to unravel and let loose─you taking the reigns is just as good as him taking the lead. At the end of the day, as long as he gets your undivided attention, the dynamic doesn't matter. We're talking about a guy who pretends to be a poised gentleman and a functional member of society. A cowardly snake who doesn't want to face the consequences of his actions and would absolutely prefer to double down on his awful behaviour and then die at the end than think of apologizing to a single person.

This guy? As a Yandere? Yeah, he will adapt to you, but he will also allow you to manipulate him if you have the courage to reach out and tug at his leash, to take advantage of his obsession. I would even go as far to say that THIS outcome would be the best one for him, as it means that he doesn't have to take responsibility for his own life: that burden is now on you, you own him now. Good luck!

For this post, I'll talk about this secret third option since it's the most interesting in my opinion!

I'm not sure how to format my headcanons and thoughts properly, so I'll do something new and rate the general Yandere traits I think are relevant for him! Obsessiveness is one I specifically left out because it's the most basic requirement for Yandere characters, it feels unnecessary to discuss it. That shit must be cranked up to the highest setting or else there's no Yandere in the first place!

Possessive: ✦✦✦✧✧✧

In this context, he perceives his life to belong to you and only you─the nuance of the situation and whether it gets worse or a better for him are up to you, there's literally endless possibilities─and so it makes sense for him to be possessive, but not in the traditional sense that we're used to, so to say?

Because one of the important aspects of Forget Me Not as a character is the self-loathing. To me, this is one of the few core aspects that must remain in every AU or iteration for him to feel in-character. He's defined by revenge, self-loathing and a delusional mind. And it's this self-loathing that leads Forget Me Not into a very, very insecure mindset─because he's fully aware that YOU could aim for a better lifestyle, a better partner, someone who wants what's best for you instead of wanting to drag you down, deeper and deeper into the mess that is his life. Of course, this is something he won't allow now that you've so gracefully let him latch onto your side like a parasite, but it's a possibility that will continue to haunt him forever.

And so, he's possessive of your ownership and control over him, what he perceives to be the bond that ties you to him or viceversa. It's not quite "You're mine, and no one else's", it's more of a "I'm yours, and no one else's".

No matter what you do to him, he will remain by your side. The idea of you favouring someone else, or choosing to be with someone else and keep him by the sidelines, well, it will ruin him, of course! But Forget Me Not has been waiting for the other shoe to drop his whole life, and so NOTHING you can do can convince him to leave or do anything to "get back at you" in a direct way─aside from manipulating the world to leave you behind instead, perhaps. I like to think he'd still be a pretty pathetic, soggy and miserable guy. Desperate to prove to you that he's going to stay no MATTER what you do or say to him.

It's fine if you hate him, it's fine if you love him. But at the end of the day, you should at appreciate his loyalty and treasure him. Forget Me Not wants YOU to be the possessive one, to want him despite how awful he is, all while accepting the fact that you will never truly be his, because he doesn't deserve you.

Not to say that you keep the guy on a literal leash 24/7, of course! But to if you were to flirt with someone else in front of him, chances are Forget Me Not won't move a single finger. He would stay there, glaring daggers at the perpetrator, and then whine and guilt trip you into paying attention to him. But if someone were to flirt with him instead, he would be pretty ruthless in his rejection, proud and loudly declaring who he belongs to.

Perhaps it would be better to describe him as clingy instead? I think as indulgent as Forget Me Not can be when it comes to his vices, being by your side would be his utmost priority in this context. He won't follow you around like a lost puppy like other characters might do, but he would instead pull a few strings here and there behind the scenes to ensure you always happen to be within his line of sight.

Actually, now that I'm thinking, Forget Me Not as a Yandere would have EXTREME separation issues. This guy would ABSOLUTELY be the type to watch you sleep, because he just can't fathom the idea of being, what, 8 hours away from you? All of this being tied to his anxieties and codependency. I don't see him being very vocal about his love for you, or if he is then the sort of shit he spouts could easily be misinterpreted as thinly veiled threats, or just self-affirmations for himself.

Delusional: ✦✦✦✦✦✦

I'm giving him full points in this section because aside from the aforementioned anxieties, paranoia and self-loathing that gets him to be so, so very miserable, Forget Me Not is pretty much Delusional with a capital D.

Regardless of the path that led you to him and this situation, Forget Me Not would cling onto the fact that you currently own his heart, his mind and his entire life─this OBVIOUSLY means, in his book at least, that you care or love him just enough to take on such a burden. It's pretty much everything I discussed up until now mixed into one big cocktail of delusion and desperation. There's no takebacksies now!

Regardless of your treatment of him, Forget Me Not wholeheartedly believes that you love him to some degree, and that is more than enough for him to fuel his delusions, to overthink every action and every gesture as an act of love. He can still read you like an open book, he knows whenever you're nervous, whenever you're scared, whenever you get angry at him─how else can one explain such reactions, if love isn't at the center of it all? If you didn't love him, you would treat him with indifference, you would discard him like a broken toy!

Of course, if you WERE to treat him with indifference or attempt to discard him and get him out of your life, he would just find more and more ways to come back, to twist your words and their meaning to something that fits his narrative, to worm his way into your life the same way you've done, worming into his own heart. There's no point in trying to make sense of his logic, there is none, it's just the nonsensical, lovestruck fantasy he's built for himself.

Whether you kick him in the mouth or hold him close to you, the only truth Forget Me Not will stand for is your love for him.

But I think it would be fun if this is something he only made known to you? To the outside world, he makes them believe what they want to believe, make whatever assumption about your relationship with him─the muddier the truth becomes for the rest, the easier it is for him to trap and isolate you. Forget Me Not has a talent for acting, to play every unassuming role required for whatever schemes he's got under his sleeve, he might be a pathetic, desperate excuse of a man, kneeling and clinging onto you, but he still retains his cunning mind when it matters. And when you're not around to cloud his vision, he's dangerous.

No matter what others might think, Forget Me Not would find a way to profit─it doesn't matter if your best friend has an inkling about the true nature of your relationship, he will capitalize on it to ensure they remain far, far away from helping you escape. If your coworkers or classmates or what have you believe you two are an odd couple? Then that's what you two are! It's not like they know any better!

Forget Me Not knows more than anyone that there is no fighting the perception of others. There is a group of humans who simply decided he was the Devil himself, based entirely on his heritage rather than his actions. So he plays his part and lets their own biases do their thing, easy.

In that same vein, if you've indulged or pampered him a lot, then he would be more ready to believe anything you say. Sure, Forget Me Not knows that you may lie to him, you might've done that already many times before, but how can he say no when you've been so sweet to him lately?

Manipulative: ✦✦✦✦✦✦

You know what. Self-explanatory, I don't even have to ramble about this because I've talked about how manipulative Forget Me Not is in pretty much all of his posts. He rarely chooses direct confrontations,

I'm inclined to believe that he would only do so in extreme situations, and even so, he would only dirty his hands and confront whatever obstacles in his path─but confronting you? He's too much of a coward, he would never dream of confronting you without ensuring that you will deliver the answer and reaction he seeks, out of fear of hearing the truth from your own lips. I insist, he's not afraid of digging himself into his own grave with his schemes and manipulations if it means maintaining this whole status quo.

So, instead let me talk about how you can manipulate him instead, to level the field a little!

Physical touch in any way is the easiest way to force Forget Me Not to listen. From pulling on his hair to caressing his cheek─I don't think he will ever get used to having you touch him. Again, he thrives with whatever you throw at him, so it's up to you to choose.

I think lying to him and getting away with it is very difficult. In fact, if you think you've successfully lied to him, it's probably because he decided to let you believe he's none the wiser. so instead you would have to appeal to his emotional side. It's as easy as bringing up the whole ownership/possessive aspect, any reminder that he's all yours is enough to get Forget Me Not to comply after some minimum reluctance and pushback from him. It doesn't matter if you're guilt tripping him or threatening him, he thinks it's so romantic that you would go out of your way to reassure him of his position.

Sadism ✦✦✧✧✧✧ / Masochism ✦✦✦✦✧✧

Lately, I've been seeing Yandere content being slowly portrayed as a watered down version of what it used to be, like, to call a character who is just possessive a Yandere and that's it.

But I'm a fan of dark content, and to theorize about everything that comes with these themes─this includes physical harm, something that people are more sensitive towards, which is fair and I understand if this isn't everyone's cup of tea!

So far, most of the violence towards the reader has been emotional and psychological, with physical violence being directed instead to third parties. Here, there will be discussions of potential physical violence towards the reader and Forget Me Not.

That's why this section is at the bottom, so that you can opt out of it!

Something I forgot to bring up directly is the themes of idealization and religious parallels when it comes to the way Forget Me Not interprets his relationship with you.

Despite all these things, he still considers you way above him, a holy figure deserving of everything he can offer─so I don't think he would be physically abusive nor be threatening in this way either. He finds zero pleasure in the idea of physically harming you, and would very much prefer to chip away at your mental stability and vulnerability by hurting himself. Hell, he would prefer to have YOU hurt him instead, to have physical proof of your influence on his body. It aligns perfectly with his self-loathing. If you could scrape off all of his scales with your nails and replace when with the scars you leave him, he would be so, so very grateful.

Or to have you pluck his scales off one by one as punishment, he would absolutely love that. I think that, in those days in which he cannot tolerate nor deal with himself, when he cannot drown his sorrows in alcohol, he would become an active nuisance for the very small and off chance that you lash out at him. It's very cathartic to him.

This post focuses on a very specific outcome of the whole Yandere situation with Forget Me Not, but even so, I believe that every other version in every other situation would still have Forget Me Not being more of a masochist than a sadist. At least when talking about his darling. Given the type of person that he is and all, he would still prefer more mental games.

#reverse 1999 #reverse 1999 x reader #reverse 1999 forget me not #forget me not #yandere #this feels a little like yandere x yandere #but thats partially bc FMN is a fucking freak #phew i think i got the whole dark content for FMN stuff out of my system now

[fromtheboundlesssea]

Listening to A Game of Thrones again. I only just finished Jon I and I just had a thought that I have no wish to expand upon at this moments, but maybe I will later or someone else could if they wish.

Starks and Targaryens

Lyanna / Ned / Catelyn -> Aemma / Viserys / Alicent

Lyanna and Aemma die giving birth to a child wanted by the father only for their only living child to be the gender the father of the child did not want. Both women haunt the story even though they are relegated to very brief mentions in their “historical” records. Both die due to a Targaryen man’s irrational belief in prophecy.

Ned and Viserys attempts to keep the peace between the two halves of their family, however, their first “child” causes tensions with his wife and other children and there is a divide between them. Both treat their first children above the typically accepted position their birth would have entitled them to.

Catelyn and Alicent are married to men and constantly feel compared to a woman who is dead or gone and feels threatened by the protective nature of their husband towards their first child. Both have a child who is disabled, only for their husbands to not care. No one was punished, even lightly, for the blinding of Aemond, and Viserys brushed the incident away. Ned left Catelyn alone with Bran, who could have very well died while he was away and chose his duty to Jon Arryn, someone dead, above his son. Both women die with vengeance for their dead children on their lips.

Jon / Robb -> Rhaenyra / Aegon II

Jon and Rhaenyra are their father’s eldest child and is raised above the station many children in their positions are given (Jon as a bastard and Rhaenyra as a girl). Their position within the family puts their stepmothers on edge and their positions also serve as a vague threat to their half-siblings. They both leave their homes and “set up court” elsewhere, Jon at Castle Black and Rhaenyra in Dragonstone, and stay away from the main fight of the series. Both were born the opposite gender their fathers wanted.

Robb and Aegon II both picked up their crowns after the urging of familial figures that discussed the danger their siblings are threatened with. Both lost control of their anger once their siblings began dying. Neither man seemed insistent on a crown and do not think of their other sibling as a danger to themselves despite the warnings of their mother. Both are betrayed by allies.

Benjen -> Daemon

These are more foils. Benjen is everything that Daemon is not and vice versa. Benjen sends himself into exile and remains there and serves the King and his brother with honor. He also tries to look out for his nephew and help raise him to be a proper man for the time he is with him. Daemon is constantly exiled for his actions but always comes back and leads his niece astray.

Jon / Sansa -> Aegon III / Jaehaera

Both Jon and Aegon III are made heir by the will of the previous king so that a woman won’t be given the throne (albeit for different reasons). Both have a complicated relationship with symbol of their house. They are traumatized by the death of a woman who had great influence over them (Ygritte and Rhaenyra). Both were never meant to be put in royal positions of authority, Jon being both a bastard and a second son, and Aegon with three older brothers and the son of the losing side.

Sansa and Jaehaera are both girls deeply traumatized by witnessing the death of beloved male relatives who are wrongly beheaded right in front of them. The two girls serve as keys to their houses and inheritance and are used for that inheritance despite being willed away from such an inheritance. While incited to violence, both are reluctant to such murder and do not enact it. They serve as a representative to sides of a war that are not well liked in the current ruling dynasty.

Ironically, if Jonsa were to happen it would be a true reconciliation of two sides of the similar conflicts that originated with the questions of inheritance.

Lannisters and Strongs

Tywin -> Lyonel

Both men are considered to be great politicians. However, their children undermined their political influence and reveal that both men are not actually as great as they are initially believed to be. Tywin does not think about the long term. Lyonel allows his son to put them all in danger by even allowing such rumors to swirl. If Lyonel were smart, he would have nipped those rumors in the bud not only to protect his son, but to not add shaky foundations for Rhaenyra’s reputation.

Jaime / Cersei -> Harwin / Rhaenyra

Both men have affairs with royal women and sire children that look like them. Both men have three bastards destined to die due to the greed of the women they love who can and will never acknowledge them as the fathers of their children.

Cersei and Rhaenyra do not wish to have children with their husbands, for different reasons, and often put their own sexual pleasure above their positions at court and their own allies. Both women are threatened by younger women who could usurp their place and often belittle them for the sake of their own vanity. Both greatly fear their younger brothers and what hand they might take in their deaths.

Tyrion / Larys

Both men are the “lesser” sons of their fathers and are disfigured—earning nicknames for said disfigurement. Both men are very resentful towards their siblings and either enact or wish for the destruction of their houses.

#house of the dragon #a song of ice and fire #game of thrones #jonsa #anti viserys i targaryen #anti rhaenyra targaryen #those tags just in case

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I’m a bit surprised that the whole “Fyodor has a god complex” thing is so widespread. Asides from the fact that him seeing himself as a follower of god’s will is, well, canon, and in turn makes his use and control of others and eagerness to speak to Dazai, an “equal mind”, a neat juxtaposition, it also makes the whole Fyodor-Mykola dynamic so much more interesting.

If Fyodor sees himself as god, then his fascination with Mykola becomes the fascination one might have with a trapped, fluttering bug; Mykola’s fondness for Fyodor becomes devotion. But that’s not the dynamic they have at all.

Fyodor is an actor of god’s will. He does what is necessary, in his view, to create the order and perfection he thinks is inherent to God. “In opposition to God, you are fighting to lose sight of yourself” - is what he says to Mykola. “Splendid.” It is still said with the expectation he will fail, I believe. But it’s not said from some high vantage, just a certain interest at the futility of it all, but also an appreciation for, ironically enough, the clarity with which Mykola sees things. That freedom runs in opposition to Fyodor’s quest for perfection, but both goals lie in the capacity they share to see what lies beneath the surface of society like few else. And so Fyodor… just lets Mykola do what he wants, mostly. Mykola is a wild card; he helps the decay just as much as he acts independently. Fyodor is very direct with his control most of the time, but Mykola is not ensnared in Fyodor’s web, but in the web of God himself. Fyodor finds him intriguing. He indulges his quest for freedom. He indulges his silliness too.

And Mykola, who would commit acts of evil, acts he acknowledges as evil, just to break free of earthly bonds; to become someone un-beholden to society or morality or human attachment; he feels seen. He calls Fyodor his friend. He engages him, on friendly terms, in a way no one else does; with games, and no fear of contact. He feels understood, for once (look how quickly he throws his act up again when Atsushi cannot understand his fascination with birds) - and therein lies the problem. He is fighting to lose himself. Instead, Fyodor saw through him. ‘Found’ him, in a sense. And now Mykola has exactly what he was trying so hard to break free from - attachment to another; not the attachment of worship to a deity but the bond that comes from seeing and being seen. As screwed up as they both are, it’s just a friendship, plain and simple. But Mykola cannot lose sight of himself for as long as he is seen. So he has to die. Fyodor has to die because Mykola must do cruel, evil things if he is ever to be free of bonds, and expectation, and love, and the reflection that comes with someone knowing the depths of whatever remains of your soul.

And all the while, no matter how Fyodor wields his righteous hand and intellect and Mykola cuts and hacks at the strands of his still-beating heart in an attempt to grow wings, they both play by, in Fyodor’s eyes, the rules of God’s intent. Ultimately, they walk the same ground as the other.

#why the hell did this end up so stupidly flowery what happened to me #anyways again my views will probably change when more is revealed about them #but for now this is how I see it. there’s more to it but this’ll do for now. as always just fyi I know nothing about religion sorry #bsd #bsd fyodor #bsd hohol #fyolai #storyrambles #dan if you’re reading this if I misinterpreted your boy I’m sorry I slammed this out in a haze in about 10 minutes lol #there are probably some things I’m misremembering

[celticcrossanon]

BRF Reading - 28th of September 2023

This is speculation only

Cards drawn on the 28th of September, 2023

Question: Is Harry worried about losing his Counsellor of State status?

Note: This reading is filled with stress and worry energy. I can feel it pouring off the cards. As I handle the cards, I feel extremely stressed. I can feel my shoulders rising and the muscles turning to iron with the stress, and I can feel it quivering in my other muscles and churning in my stomach.

Interpretation: Harry is very worried and stressed about losing his Counsellor of State status.

Card One: The Emperor, in reverse

The Emperor is the ruler, and also father figure. It represents authority, control, structure, and protection. Here the card stands for King Charles, who is Harry's father and his king.

The Emperor in reverse tells me that Harry feels that his father has set his face against Harry. He feels that the protection and security of having the BRF as a safety net, that he has enjoyed until now, has been withdrawn. Harry feels that his father is being cruel and uncaring, that he is not protecting Harry and Harry's interests any more, that Harry does not have the structure of the BRF to fall back on, and that his father is not listening to what he (Harry) wants. Harry sees King Charles as the cold, uncaring, distant, emotionally detached father, represented by the Emperor in reverse.

I am getting a lot of fear from this card. Harry is petrified by this change in attitude from King Charles. He thought he could rock up and take his place back in the BRF as if nothing had happened, and it is slowly dawning on him that this is not the case, and he is scared of what will happen to him if he goes back to the UK (as he seems to be planning to do).

Card Two: The Nine of Swords

This is the card of being very stressed; so stressed that you can't sleep at night. This is how Harry is feeling right now. He is tossing and turning, trying to figure out how he can get his father to 'like' him again, where 'like' means get his father to indulge him and clean up his messes and let him do what he wants in the future, like what happened in the past. Harry does not know how to deal with this father who says No to him.

Card Three: The Six of Wands, in reverse

Upright, this is a card of success, of triumph, the conquering hero being greeted by adoring crowds as he rides home in a victory parade. In the reverse, it is the opposite - a card of failure, where you creep home in tatters having been unable to achieve what you set out to do, with no rewards and no public acclaim.

This is the future that Harry sees for himself, and this is what he does not want to do. He relies on his position as the Counsellor of State to boost his pride and his ego. He uses it to remind himself that he is somebody, that he deserves special treatment, that he is better than everyone else. Losing the Counsellor of State position will drive home that he is not special, that he is a failure, and Harry can not stand that. He sees the Counsellor of State position as something that is his because he is special (it is slowly morphing into his birthright in his mind), and if he loses it he will feel devastated, a complete failure, although his will justify it to himself as 'they took it from me because they were jealous of my success', deep down he knows the truth, even if he does not want to admit it to himself.

Wands is the suit of PR, and Harry does not want to lose the PR of being a Counsellor of State. In both cases it is not the job itself that he minds losing, but rather the public acknowledgement of his special position because of his birth (Counsellors of State are are always the monarch's spouse and the next four people in the line of succession, subject to certain requirements).

Underlying Energy: The Seven of Wands, in reverse

The Seven of Wands is a card of conflict and arguing. It can mean giving up, letting go, surrendering, but that is not the energy I am getting from this card. The energy I am getting is the meaning of the reversed Seven of Wands that is being overwhelmed by challenges, unable to see the big picture, feeling that you have to compete all the time, comparing yourself to others, and feeling constantly criticised and judged.

Harry feels that he is constantly being criticised, judged, and compared to others, and that is not fair because he is just so much better than the other people. There is an energy of being overwhelmed by the constant judgement directed towards him.

Wands can be PR, and a reversed card would mean negative PR. Harry definitely does not want the negative PR that would occur if he lost the Counsellor of State title - in fact, he doesn't want any PR about it at all if he loses the title.

Underlying Energy Two: The Four of Pentacles

This is the card of hanging onto status (or wealth) no matter what. It is about being insecure and possessive and needing material things to feel secure (or in Harry's case, security details). This is how Harry feels about the Counsellor of State title. In his mind, it is his, it belongs to him, and they can't take it away from him. It is a hanging on energy and a greedy energy. The desire for the title is because of the privileges it grants him and how special it makes him feel, and not for any other reason.

Conclusion:

Harry is very stressed and scared about losing his Counsellor of State title. He is so stressed over this that he can't sleep at nights. He wants to keep the title because of the privileges it gives him and because in his mind it marks him as being special. He sees losing the title as sign that he is a failure and he does not want that to happen. He is tired of being compared to other people (i.e. Prince William) and of being criticised and judged. He just wants everyone to see how special and important he is so they give him what he wants.

Harry's fear and stress have their source in how his father is treating him. He sees his current treatment by his father as his father being cold, uncaring, and cruel (I hear the words 'He is being mean to me' in my mind). This treatment is his father saying No to his demands (e.g. he could not stay at Kensington palace during his recent one day visit in the UK for Wellchild). Harry is stressed because he feels that his father is no longer there to protect him, indulge him, look after his interests and clean up his messes, like he did in the past. If his father is willing to be that cruel to him, Harry thinks, then maybe he will take away his Counsellor of State tile was well (as in not help Harry keep the title).

Note: I'm sorry if this is a bit incoherent - Harry is not a logical thinker in any way, shape or form. It is all emotional thinking with him, and the idea that his actions have consequences is nowhere to be found in his mind. It is always someone else's fault (usually because they are jealous of how special he is).

[shadowkat678]

Hopepunk: A Thing Of Teeth And Claws

Hope is a thing with feathers, says a famous poem by Emily Dickinson.

But what happens to that small thing of feathers once it's caught? When the horror around it crashes down, and the song is drowned out in pain and anger and apathy at a world that doesn’t seem to be capable of, and doesn’t want, to change?

I’m tired. I’m angry. I'm afraid. I don’t remember the last time those things weren’t true about me. I don’t have control over what is happening to the world, or to the people I care about. I don’t know if I have a future.

I’m tired.

I know it isn’t just me. I’ve seen it. I’ve been in activism spaces for years now, where that same anger is everywhere. The push to want to do something. To enact some sort of meaningful change in a world that seems hellbent on turning people into nothing but variables and numbers towards goals we are not calculated into otherwise. Where those with the best of intentions burn themselves out in their rage because they feel like there’s nothing else left to be driven by. I feel it in me. It’s not unjustified. But it is exhausting.

Once you’ve gone long enough shoveling coal on the fire you’ll run out, and you can’t burn ashes. Something is close to giving.

I’m tired.

Even more than being tired at the state of the world, I’m tired of what it does to me. I’m tired of my inability to have these feelings result in something good. I’m tired of not being able to have control over my life. I’m tired of seeing the people around me being crushed under circumstances far above our ability to affect. I’m not just tired. I’m exhausted.

But Hopepunk. This term came out a few years ago, coined by Alexandria Rowland. They're the author of the Taste of Gold and Iron series, as well as the duology A Conspiracy of Truths and A Choir of Lies, among others. In 2017, they coined the term Hopepunk, positing it as the opposite of Grimdark. In the post original post on the subject Alexandra says,

“Hopepunk says that kindness and softness doesn’t equal weakness, and that in this world of brutal cynicism and nihilism, being kind is a political act. An act of rebellion. Hopepunk says that genuinely and sincerely caring about something, anything, requires bravery and strength. Hopepunk isn’t ever about submission or acceptance: It’s about standing up and fighting for what you believe in. It’s about standing up for other people. It’s about DEMANDING a better, kinder world.”

The ideology of Hopepunk was based on the time of the article’s current political landscape. Protests, civil unrest, and feelings of anger that were (still are, I’d argue) spreading like wildfire. And in a small circle, this caught on. There wasn’t much to go off of, and the ideas that spread from this post didn’t have a uniformity to it as much as other Punk genres of political and literary analysis. There were, and are, a lot of critics believing the term to be yet another line of fluffy optimism and half empty words.

A year later, Alexandria would publish an article on the subject, expanded upon additional reflection, called One Atom of Justice, One Molecule of Mercy, and the Empire of Unsheathed Knives on the blog Optimistic Indie Roleplaying. This is when I first heard of Hopepunk.

Alexandria writes in their opening:

“In July of 2017, I coined the word “Hopepunk,” initially defined very simply in a Tumblr post. I believe the purpose of this article’s commission was to have me write something uplifting. I don’t know if I can. I think it would be (I’m afraid it would be) nice. (…) Nice is an illusion, and so is the suddenness of realizing the lie.”

Alexandria goes on:

“I’m afraid. I’m losing my story, my belief in an atom of justice. I watch it happen, a little more every day, unraveling from my hands—and I’m a professional storyteller. (…) I’m afraid of who I’ll be when the last threads slip out of my fingers. I’m afraid of settling into complacency, of something in me breaking, of retreating into niceness as the last-ditch sanctuary before complete despair.

“Hopepunk says [about human nature], ‘The glass is half full,’” wrote the me who lived in mid-2017. Seems naïve now, doesn’t it? Those are the words of a person cloaked in a story that hasn’t yet been worn threadbare and ragged; a person who thinks they have a sword in their hands, a person who thinks that they as an individual can make a difference, that there is some fundamental goodness in humanity.

What do we do when our hands are empty, when our warm cloaks are gone, when we look around and see how big the world is? When we see how helpless and insignificant we are, how the rest of the world isn’t even particularly cruel or evil, just . . . mediocre? Complacent?

What’s the point?”

And as I read this now, years later in 2023, I feel this sentiment burrowing deeper inside me than ever before. This is what I see in myself. In the people around me. In the world, spinning away into what seems to be never ending disasters and war and pain.

What's the point?

It seems that day by day the hole is dug deeper. The world feels as if it’s ending. But then again, to someone, somewhere, the world has always felt as if it was on the verge of ending, hasn’t it?

I also am a storyteller. I have always believed there is power in it. In how you can create something that becomes real around you. That reflects our own reality in new ways. Things that connect us. Empower us. That’s what art is for me. That’s what it always has been, when the night is long and I need something, anything, to grab onto.

Like Alexandria, I feel my grip on the story around me slipping. The threads are frayed. And I am so tired.

I feel like a child pretending. Hoping that this will make things feel less terrifying when the lights go out and I’m alone in the dark and the day is so impossibly far away. I’m afraid. I'm terrified.

I’m not a hero, and I don’t know if I have the tools to fight monsters like this. These are not problems that can be solved with spells or swords or pretty words. The world around me is burning.

I’m burning.

So, what do we do when we find ourselves here? When hope, the thing of wings and feathers, has been shot down in front of us? When softness is not enough? When nice is just platitudes? What can I do when the world and its problems are so big and I’m so small?

“What is the point?” Alexandra asks. “How do you do it? How do you manage when the task before you is enormous and impossible? (…) How do you go on?”

Hopepunk isn’t just about the Hope part of the word. What is Punk? Not just the music. The ideology. The movement. The message? We all have a thought about what Hope is. What defines Punk?

I listen to the music, and have for a while. I have a lot of friends who are punks. I’d like to think I’m a bit of a punk myself, though I haven’t had the energy or means of connecting with the scene in person. There’s a variety to it. Subgenres of music. Differences in ideas. But let me tell you one thing I’ve noticed about all punks:

They’re goddamn stubborn bastards. And at least for the vast majority, they’re passionate goddamn stubborn bastards.

I’ve been interested in the punk movement for years. Two of my favorite books on the subject of the punk movement are “Please Kill Me: The Uncensored Oral History of Punk” by Legs McNeil and Gillian McCain, and “Punk Rock, An Oral History” by John Robb.

There’s a long running joke in punk circles about a young punk asking an older punk that very question of what punk is. The older punk smiles, strides up to a trash can, and kicks it over before turning around, pointing, and saying “That’s punk”.

The younger punk thinks on this, then sees another trash can before going over and copying the move, turning around after punting the second can and asking, “That’s punk?”

Before the older punk shakes his head and replies, “No! You poser!”

Point of the story? What is punk? Fuck if I or anyone else actually knows! It’s not about following directions, or going down a checklist. Certainly not just copying everyone else before you. But you know it when you feel it.

Recently, Punk has been idealized a lot. People forget that Punk isn’t just about insolent people lashing out against authority and sticking it to the man. It isn’t just about individualism and loud songs.

Despite not knowing exactly WHAT punk is, never having one clear cut uniform answer, we can see it when it's in front of us. There’s a sound to it. A spirit. A vibe. And there are commonalities that run as a throughline.

In the intro to Punk Rock, and Oral History, Henry Rowlins was invited to share some of his thoughts in the volume. He says,

“Everyone had their own version of punk. Everyone decided what punk was for them. There were endless arguments about what we were fighting for, what we should be wearing (…), what we should listen to and how we were going to change the world.

Punk terrified the establishment. Punk made me get onstage and make music. Punk made me change my world. Punk…punk saved my life.”

Punk has long been considered one of the more nihilistic musical genres, having a thriving subsect of Political Punk dedicated to pointing out and raging at the wrongs of the world the artists see around them. Punk is angry. Punk is passionate. Punk is loud, and messy, and sometimes even ugly, and moreover, there’s room for all of it.

But its stereotypical image perhaps isn't one most people would default to when thinking about the mainstream idea of Hope. Hope is supposed to be something soft, isn't it?

Back to the article, Alexandria gives their answer to what they think the point is, and it is one that feels much more connected to the punk part of Hopepunk.

“Sheer, simple, bloody-minded obstinacy. That’s how you count the stars, build the Library of Alexandria, and go to the North Pole. That’s how you hold the story even when it’s unraveling in your hands. You grit your teeth, and bear the pain, and keep going: One star at a time, one brick at a time, one step at a time.

You can do a lot when you decide to be a stubborn motherfucker who refuses to die.(…) Ask it of Hopepunk, then: “What’s the point?”

And the answer is, of course, that the fight itself is the point.

I am not just tired. I am afraid. I am angry. I am furious. The idea of rage is generally thought of as very punk.

But Hope. Let’s go back to hope. Where does hope come in, that fragile thing made of feathers and song? I am not soft. Not really. I feel myself shattering, jagged edges that will cut me if I let them. That will cut others. Even those I want to help. Even those who don’t deserve it. That the anger will bleed out and burn everything around me. How does that fit with hope?

I believe in stories. That we can learn from them. Moreover, in the end, I believe that everything is a story. History is a story. People are stories. The future is a story we simply haven’t seen the ending to yet, and so can still shape the path of. And like stories, all these elements tie together. Stings whose threads make up a tapestry.

I’ve been thinking a lot about stories lately. About certain ones that have heavily impacted my own. About ones I’ve made, either by myself or with others, both real and imaginary. In Alexandria’s first post, they mentioned a certain scene from the Two Towers.

As Frodo falls to his lowest point, burdened by the influence of the One Ring, not knowing if his other friends are even still alive, carrying a burden bigger than any one person should ever have to shoulder, Sam gives his speech.

Sam: “It’s like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened?

But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why.

But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.”

And as he says this, Frodo asks what I find myself asking. What many people ask, I think. What are we holding onto? And the answer: “That there’s some good in this world, Mr. Frodo… and it’s worth fighting for.”

In my anger, in this darkness around us, it can be hard to see anything else. But that has not been all my story is. That said, anger is important. Anger, placed properly, and aimed towards a purpose, can be righteous. It can be a driving motivation towards change. It glows in you...but it can’t be all I have. A fire on its own will eventually burn itself out. What is anger without something the anger is driving you to do in a real, meaningful, way?

“It’s about being kind merely for the sake of kindness, and because you have the means to be, and giving a fuck because the world is (somehow, mysteriously, against all evidence) worth it and we don’t have anywhere else to go anyway.

It’s about digging in your heels and believing that one single atom of justice, one molecule of mercy does exist somewhere in the mindboggling vastness of the universe—believing in that, even if for no other reason than fuck you, buddy; fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. I do what I want and this, this is what I want; this is the world I want to live in:

One where the atom of justice exists, even if I’ve never seen it myself, even if I’ll never see it.

It’s about doing the one little thing you can do, even if it’s useless: planting seeds in the midst of the apocalypse, spitting on a wildfire, bailing out the ocean with a bucket. Individual action is almost always pointless.

Hope and strength comes from our bonds with each other, from the actions we take as a community, holding hands in the dark.

What if hope isn’t just a thing of feathers and wings and song? What if punk isn’t just about anger and insolence and lashing out against the world around you? What if the world, people, and stories aren’t so simple?

I can’t answer what Hope is, what Punk is, or what Hopepunk is as an idea binding these two words together to anyone but me. I do know what my story has been. And I know the stories I’ve been told. The stories I’ve witnessed. The stories I’ve touched.

I’m tired. I’m angry. I can’t not be anymore. I don’t think it’s possible. It’s part of me. Perhaps something even greater would be wrong if they weren’t.

But I also remember the people who’ve come into my life in ways that seem so small in comparison, yet somehow, inexplicably, still changed me to the point I continue to think about them years later. The woman who approached me, sitting outside and crying after being almost fired from my first job and, with no possibility of reconciliation, bought me a sandwich and sat with me while I waited to be picked up. Friends that stayed with me during some of the worst times of my life. Strangers that turned into those friends.

In spite of it all, I’ve also seen so much love.

I have always hated false dichotomies. These truths can coexist, and like the tapestry of stories, wind together into something bigger. The softness of hope does not feel like it can survive the type of anger and force and sometimes nihilism of punk. The good in the world feels like it should be shattered under the darkness.

Maybe it all morphs into something new.

Maybe hope becomes a thing of teeth and claws, bared in defense of life’s small everyday acts of love. Friendship. Community. Of myself, and proof that the world is brighter than my own frustration makes it feel. Of all the things that exist in contrast that make these very injustices sting so very much.

Maybe it doesn’t have to be fragile. Maybe hope can be bloody and messy and stubborn and defiant, even in the face of my fear and exhaustion and pain. Maybe it can make something more balanced. Something stronger, as all these contrasting elements come together and inform each other with new perspectives.

Maybe it can be what saves me.

Near the end of the article, Alexandria says this:

Hopepunk isn’t pristine and spotless. Hopepunk is grubby, because that’s what happens when you fight. It’s hard. It’s filthy, sweaty, backbreaking work that never ends. It isn’t pretty, and it isn’t noble, and it isn’t nice, though I expect the natural inclination (and even my own instinctive inclination) is to make it so—to forget the word “radical” in the phrase “radical kindness,” to forget the “punk” part of “hopepunk,” which is really the operative half of the word. To forget the anger of it and let it soften, because softness is what we’re aching for. We want the world to be better—kinder, more just, more merciful. We still yearn toward noblebright, toward an honest and desperate belief that love conquers all.

But we forget, sometimes, that we have knives too in this empire. That we can unsheathe them, that we can turn our blades to the defense of an atom of justice and a molecule of mercy that might not even exist—except . . . except for where we make them exist, in the hands we hold out to each other, and in the shelter we offer even when we ourselves are exhausted, footsore, and filthy, with the wolves at our doors.

Maybe this doesn’t even have to be big acts. It’s something I’ve grappled with often. The feeling that where I am now is not enough. That what I do cannot change the course of the tale I find myself part of. That I can only be a passive observer as things happen around and to me. That I am so helplessly unable to make any meaningful difference in my own story.

And I want to, so desperately. But maybe those first steps can lead to more. The shelter and small words said earnestly in a time of need is just as much a part of this as life altering choices I want to be able to wield.

I've always dreamed of enacting change. Of being someone who could somehow inspire another person the way the stories of others had inspired and saved me. The books I clutched in my hands when the world was too big, and I was far too small. But it's good to remember that even the imposing might of mountains eventually wears under the passing of water.

I still feel like that child more often than not, and that everything I do in spite of it is just a mask dangerously close to slipping. But just as much as those stories, everyday people did the same in touching me, and shaping me. The right word spoken after tragedy. Encouragement from those who bothered to pay attention to things I did not speak aloud.

Maybe I should also reconsider the worth of myself in being the hand that stretches out to other people. Maybe that kindness is just as much a part of this as my anger and fear.

I’m tired of being only angry. Of being only sharp edges and fire and fear and burning myself to ashes in a way that harms none of the people doing this to us. I’m tired of missing the joy while I can have it based on the actions of a few hollow, spiteful, greedy, and selfish bastards that only care about themselves, damn the rest.

So, I will be a thing of teeth and claws when needed. And I will grow fur to keep those close to me warm. Because despite my anger, and fear, and exhaustion, the world is still, somehow, worth it. People are worth it. I am worth it. My story can impact others, and the story of humanity is not yet fully penned.

I have to believe that. If it is not so, then I have to make it so, even out of pure, stubborn, spiteful obstinance. That people are not evil at base, because I am not, and I am not special in the grand scheme of things.

I am just a person. We are all just people, grasping for things to drive and carry us day to day. And people are both kind and horrible. Messy tapestries of different things tying us together into something unique and terrifying and amazing and horrible and full of wonder and joy and anger and fear and beauty.

All of us, each and every one, desperately trying to keep hold of our stories before someone else twists them out of our hands.

Another common example of Hopepunk is a scene in Terry Pratchett's "The Hogfather", spoken by Death. A scene Alexandria discusses and also references in the name of their own original article. Here, Death explains that humanity must first learn to believe the small lies, such as Hogfathers and tooth fairies, so eventually they can come to believe the big ones.

Justice. Mercy. Duty.

Hope.

As is true of many concepts in Diskworld, when asked by the character Susan "Well we have to believe in that, or else what is the point?", Death answers back, "My point exactly. You need to believe in things that are not true. How else can they become?"

My kindness will be worth it, because it made me and those around me a little happier. Even if it hurts me in the end. I am not naive to the world around me. I am angry. I am tired. I am scared. I am just one person. And maybe in the end it's how Alexandria says:

There are no heroes and no villains. There are just people. That’s Hopepunk: Whether the glass is half full or half empty, what matters is that there’s water in that glass. And that’s something worth defending.

Stand with each other, and never let the person beside you forget that to move forward we need something to hold onto, whether knife or outstretched hand. There is still good in this world. Even if we have to fight to create it ourselves with every step we take.

No story is over until the final word has been penned…and even with all the horrors and uncertainty of the journey, we don’t have to travel through ours alone.

#hopepunk #essay

[minimujina]

opposites attract !

i love that even though heizou is definitely an arrogant bastard to some degree, he’s actually a very caring and thoughtful person. i imagine he’d become so incredibly soft as a boyfriend, bro would seriously just melt at the precious darling in his arms as you run to hug him after a long day at work. he might know a lot of shit, but your innocence and headfirst acceptance will always be things that elude him since he happens to be quite the opposite. you are always likely to bring a fresh, unbiased perspective that he admittedly doesn’t consider sometimes, which he appreciates. to be a good and fair detective, he must be willing to consider multitudinous possibilities.

you’re also easily flustered, which he will 100% take advantage of. heizou is such a flirty bastard, but he knows what your limits are just by your demeanor, so he’ll never go so far as to make you truly uncomfortable (though he will always apologize with a gentle kiss on the lips regardless). heizou just knows how to read people, you especially—he knows what you’re likely thinking and feeling at any given moment, which makes the two of you oddly in sync for being opposites. and you, even if you aren’t particularly good at reading people, you seem to understand heizou in a way no one else does or even tries to do.

for example, only you know that heizou can be deeply affected, emotionally speaking. despite his aptly logical mind, there are certain things that will strike him to his core and convict him deeply, prompting out of control and emotional responses (though only internally). ironically, what really gets him going is actually his job to contain—those who prey on the innocent, corrupt what is good, and get away with committing evil acts. his whole reason for being a detective stems from the simmering anger in his gut that some people would choose to be so cruel, and yet no one would ever know about this anger unless he outright told them. he’s so easygoing and flirtatious that it seems like he’s got no deeper understanding of the justice system—but you know that this is not the case, and that’s enough for shikanoin heizou.

“love, what’s wrong?” the detective mused, gathering you up in his arms the way he knew you loved. cradling you across his lap, he leaned down to plant a tender kiss on your forehead. you loved to be held like this, which he had come to realize very early on.

you studied him with a quiet, gentle smile, shaking your head very subtly. “nothing’s wrong,” you murmured. “you’re just handsome. and you make a cute face when you’re thinking. and i love that.” you paused, letting your smile grow into a full grin. “and i love you. that’s all.”

heizou laughed in the most affectionate manner, losing himself in your starry, far-off gaze. it was a moment before he realized he was gaping, as if his mouth were searching for words—but the hunt turned up empty. his throat was dry, his lips a bit cracked, and still, he had nothing to say. it just so happened that the only person to ever render him speechless was you. and to be completely honest, this occurred way more often than he would have liked to admit. lucky for him, you weren’t one to spill secrets.

watching heizou struggle, you pursed your lips in an attempt not to laugh—then you just cuddled closer to him, nuzzling into the space between his shoulder and collarbone to feign innocence.

a grand sigh fell from heizou’s lips—he surrendered to your affection, placing one of his hands on your head and the other around your waist to pull you even closer. though flustered, the detective could only smile at what you’d said so nonchalantly—he’d never let you know, but he’d been deeply affected by your words, and they’d be bouncing around in his head for weeks on end if he wasn’t careful enough to focus on his job.

it’s okay, though. you already knew that. you just didn’t want to bruise his ego by telling him.

𝑀𝑀 𝐸𝐻𝐸𝐻𝐸 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑚𝑦 𝑏𝑙𝑢𝑟𝑏 𝑖 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑚𝑎𝑛

#mujimade #heizou #heizou x reader #shikanoin heizou #shikanoin heizou x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin writing #genshin drabbles #genshin #genshin impact #genshin heizou #shikanoin x reader

[hawkshadowwrites]

one hit wonder

fandom: bloodhounds (2023); ship: Hong Woo-Jin & Kim Gun-Woo

The thing is, if Woo-jin hadn’t been so unflinchingly confident that he was going to win, there was a slight chance that he could have won. But the thing is, he underestimated Gun-woo. 

At twenty-seven, the weight of the world is on his shoulders, the weight of a father's expectation and disappointment and rage; a measurement of not enough. Never enough. Always falling short. 

The trophy is his, by right. By birthright. 

If someone asked Woo-jin what the first thing he noticed about Gun-woo was, he wouldn’t be able to answer, because he didn’t notice Gun-woo. Not until they were in the ring together, facing off from opposite sides of the ring. 

Woo-jin is a seasoned boxer, an undefeated boxer. He doesn’t have to worry about the rookie — Kim Gun-woo, the super rookie — and his killer left hook to the body. One hit wonder, one and done. Woo-Jin laughs to himself at the irony, that when he wins this match and takes home the trophy, rookie Kim Gun-woo will also be a one-hit wonder. 

Despite the weight of expectations, Woo-Jin loves boxing. It’s his lifeblood, his beating heart, his blood and breath and backbone. His salvation. His deliverance. There is something transcendent about stepping into the ring, weighted gloves on his fists, staring down the man across from him. The rush of adrenaline that comes from the sound of the bell, the way they come together and meet in the middle. 

It’s not as if he delights in the fear in his opponent’s eyes, but he does find satisfaction at making men kneel. Or something to that effect. 

He feels the weight of his comrades gaze on him and shakes himself down, reminding himself that this is his ring, his lifeblood, his prize to win. Super Rookie Kim Gun-Woo and his left hook have no place here, not in his match. 

Woo-Jin expects Gun-woo to have some trepidation, but the first thing that really gets to him is how stoic he is. A wall of muscle and a walled-off mask, unreadable minute reactions that leave Woo-Jin baffled at what he is thinking. The second thing that gets to him is the fact that Gun-Woo is good.

Really good. 

Annoyingly good. 

Good enough that he manages to put Woo-Jin on the back foot, struggling to regain control of the match. The third thing is how inconvenient his defense is; one punch and two punches and three punches and four, fists connecting with solid muscle and an iron defense. Impenetrable. 

Speed and precision mean little when faced with an unmovable mountain, that you cannot move a mountain, you have to go around. So go around he does, or tries, at least. Dodging and ducking and dancing around the ring, agile and limber and light on his feet. It’s a game, really, a song and dance and call and response, a beckoning that turns into a reckoning when fists meet the face. 

Except. 

It’s Woo-Jin that takes the real official first hit. Not Gun-woo. A sharp uppercut that has him dazed, shaking the stars out of his eyes before diving back in. Gun-woo is impenetrable and Woo-Jin forgets his own very important rule: don’t get emotional. 

He can throw taunts and jabs, jeer and tease, all in attempts at aggravation and distraction. He needs his opponent to lose their cool, to lose their composure, to lose their chance at defending. 

Woo-Jin forgets this. And gets irritated. 

And takes a wicked left hook to his kidney as a consequence. He expects to shake it off, but his body has other plans and he sinks to his knees as the breath is knocked from his lungs. A single left hook and everything Woo-Jin has worked for flashes before his eyes. 

He cannot lose.

Distantly he can hear the count; one, and two, and three, and four; and the air burns as he struggles to breathe. Five, and six; Woo-Jin cannot lose like this. He cannot let this rookie punk take everything from him. 

Seven.

He stands. 

It’s enough resilience to give him a second chance, enough determination derived from pure spite that fuels his vindictive desperation to win. He can see it now, the arrogance of trying the same thing the second time. But Woo-Jin is prepared. He knows it. Knows how to block it, how to beat Gun-Woo. 

And it fails. He looks like a fool.

And Gun-Woo, the bastard, stands there and looks apologetic. 

###

Food. 

He wants food. No, he needs it. The tender texture of meat on his tongue, soju on his lips, the rejuvenation of a vigorous match; even if he lost. He doesn’t want to order take-out though, he doesn’t want to eat at home, alone. 

Food is about celebration, collaboration, connection. Food is about bringing people together, which is why the last person he expects to be waiting for him is Gun-woo. 

Gun-woo, who stands and smiles, looking genuinely happy to see him, asking shall we go eat with such eager sincerity that Woo-Jin feels justified in taking another swing at his annoying perky ass. 

Earnest. This is the best way Woo-Jin can describe the expression on Gun-Woo’s face, just as earnest as he talks about pork belly as he does to wish for Woo-Jin’s company. 

He really doesn’t know how he feels about that. His gut instinct is to say no, to scoff, to play it off and go somewhere else. But somehow when Gun-Woo turns his back, Woo-Jin feels compelled to follow. His pride may be large but his stomach is even larger. 

And the fact that Gun-Woo stole his trophy and his prize money, the least he can do is pay for dinner. 

###

It seems almost natural to fall into step with Gun-Woo, natural and intrinsic as if they just weren’t shirtless and breathless and beating each other with fists. Natural in the way their shoulders brush, in the way they sway into each other and apart — well, maybe this is just Woo-Jin, but after two nasty left hooks into his liver, he thinks he has a right to be a little unbalanced on his feet. Which has nothing to do with the solid weight and warmth of Gun-Woo. 

It’s almost too easy to tease Gun-Woo; naïveté and misguided optimism, faith and trust, wide eyes that steal all attention just to him. 

###

Sitting across from someone at a cozy barbecue joint in town should feel natural. Instead this feels intimate. The restaurant is devoid of other diners, just the two of them in the center of the room, table covered in various dishes. 

Woo-Jin watches as Gun-Woo carefully places each slice onto the grill and he feels compelled to know everything. This turns out to be a mistake because with each question his fascination grows; strong and competent and powerful, yet humble and modest as if it truly is nothing worth mentioning. 

Stubborn, too. Stubborn enough that Woo-Jin really wants to get Gun-Woo to obey. There are other things Woo-Jin notices, like how Gun-Woo’s eyelashes frame his expressive eyes, how he has two moles on the left side of his nose, and how good he is at just about everything. 

How when he smiles, it makes his heart skip a beat. 

How he promises to obey, and then still doesn’t listen. How much that thought devolves into something else, a flush creeping across his skin. 

How when Gun-Woo says hyeong the heat makes a home inside of him. How his thoughts are consumed with Gun-Woo saying hyeong with those wide eyes and soft smile. 

How he opens his mouth and leans forward, taking the food into his mouth with such enthusiasm Woo-Jin feels flushed and flustered. How he wonders what else he can put in Gun-Woo’s mouth. 

###

The alcohol settles under his skin and he feels the giddiness grow, rising up in him like a balloon. He feels weightless, even despite the loss of the match, something about Gun-Woo’s effervescent enthusiasm enough to infect him with genuine joy. 

They walk in pace, slowly, as if they have nowhere to go or nowhere to be, as if the only thing that matters is the two of them. The night however, is drawing to a close, and Woo-Jin already regrets the loss of time. He doesn’t understand how someone can make him feel weightless, full of joy. 

He needs this to happen again, so he pulls out his phone and hands it to Gun-Woo. He turns, catching sight of the crinkle in Gun-Woo’s eyes as he teases him, words soft and breathless on his lips. Their knees brush and neither one of them moves, the warmth pressing in until Woo-Jin never wants to leave. 

But then the bus comes, screeching to a halt with a whoosh as the doors swing open, Gun-Woo standing and giving Woo-Jin one last smile. 

Woo-Jin watches him depart on the bus, enchanted. Perhaps next time he will find the courage to see what Gun-Woo’s lips actually taste like. 

#bloodhounds #hong woo jin #kim gun woo #kdrama #bloodhounds (2023) #bloodhounds netflix #woo do hwan #lee sang yi #bloodhounds fanfic #woo jin x gun woo #kdramas

[obihoe]

aughh ok so im thinking abt madara again and im. i feel like madara kind of represents a very specific theme abt being corrupted by ur own desire. or like .. following what u desire to the very end up until it destroys u. like madara i think, while he obviously has a thought-thru ideology. what drives him eventually is his desire. to become god, to control his life and his world, he wants power and that is the thing that destroys him. its like .. u want something and u want it SO BAD that it clouds up ur judgement and prevents u from rational thinking. madara doesnt notice that he's becoming a tyrant. he doesnt notice that he becomes just like kaguya. he doesnt notice how the same thing he keeps claiming, that power, that chakra, corrupts, applies to himself more than anyone else here. actually, almost everything madara believes applies mostly to himself? lol. like the thing also with humans striving for peace but then also having a desire for conflict. literally nobody on narutoverse incorporates that more than him. he's a battlefreak but he also aims to erase all conflict and create a whole paradise matrix. that is so perfect that it would likely be Too perfect actually to be actually fulfilling for the ppl who get caught in there ... anyways, but the way that his power corrupts him. he does not notice this. the power feels Good and he wants more of it. we can see that most obviously i think when he absorbs the godtree. when he starts laughing and looks at his hands .. and then tells naruto that he cannot defeat him bc he's immortal now. he will live forever .. its like, the main thing that blinds him i think is this Immense desire of his to get to that position. finally achieve not just worldpeace but a position where he will be comfortable. and that desire is so strong .. that it blinds him towards anything else and he's completely oblivious to it. its a very fascinating way to lose control over urself i think. bc madara extremely ironically wants to attain control thru this but the process of it leads to the exact opposite. he doesnt just lose control (never had any, really, to start with) bc its his fate but he also loses control over himself and his own actions. like the corruption ... it comes from the inside. escalating towards the exact opposite of what he originally wanted ... its too late now to turn back. too late now to rethink ur plans bc u are so close to finally getting what u want. and u turn into a whole different person, u abandon urself and ur humanity in pursuit of the one thing that promises happiness .. and u cant even think abt whether its gonna actually make u happy anymore either. u just know that youve wanted this all ur life. so u cannot stop anymore. it takes literally divine intervention to get him to stop

#its like ... feel like there's almost an analogy there somewhere to like. addiction. asfsfsgsda #bc addiction .. it is also abt pursuing smth that feels good at the cost of whatever #ur rational brain might be telling u that this is wrong #but it feels good?? or it promises at least to feel good .. so u cant help but keep doing/pursuing it #making up the wildest connections here i am sorry #but mdr .. the problem is that his rational brain has decided to do this as well. years prior to this #and then when he is in the process of completing it. actually gaining the power as well #it starts feeling Good as well and so he starts desire it more and more #and then cannot stop anymore .. #anyway yeah #madara #posts

[buzzbbun]

I Wrote a lot about Octavios music Teehee. (both his themes, Callie and his collab and 3MIX)

something I found interesting. Was how in splatoon1 his voice was much more like softer, not that grimy feel he has now, (although he still has it in his dialog so idk-) which makes me think he recorded the vocals at the beginning of the war, plus it makes sense due to the first theme feeling very like, authoritative, it was very out there, plus the chanting where it goes “U A, U O A” which gives it a huge octarian feel, along with the bells as if it’s the end Y’know? Also all the beat drops and wind-ups, along with a considerable tech feel, the synthetic kinda noises, which kinda show's how he was still learning, especially how he kinda loses control for a moment in one of the fazes where it’s like the disks jog back and forth, along with how kinda quiet it is compared to the BOOM his other themes have, which I can say the same with his voice, (ignoring the term balls dropped here) it shows how once he gained more popularity as a DJ he just got louder, and the weird voice box he has now is most likely due to his old age and his throat sounding like it’s sore as fuck, Although comparing this to his remix of his own theme in Splatoon3 is much faster yet the background noise is more chillax, you can still faintly hear the ‘u a, u o a’ in the beat, yet seconds after shit goes ham in an ‘in your face' manner as he starts spitting bars, instead of a quiet voice with slightly louder music doing the work it’s the opposite here, his voice being louder and the backbeat matching his words, also it sounds a little intergalactic which is ironic cause he ends up helping you in space, you can’t hear the chanting anymore most likely because he fights you alone on the surface, which he just does himself with some of the beats, also it’s most likely as short as it is due to not having the great zapfish and being defeated quicker than the other two times.

Ok so back to splatoon2, Callie and him practically collabed instead of him using his own theme, with Bomb Bomb Blush Ft:Callie, It still has very much octavios i guess preference, except it’s much more expansive with different styles of music, showing how over the years he used other music to mix with his own (which is DJ-Ing at its finest) yet still has much of a threatening army tone, yet again here he uses the chanting beat instead of having the octarians do it most likely to let Callie sing her ass off, so they don’t steal her spot-light, yet there’s another beat that sounds almost inspiring like to give hope to his people in a way, cause if you really think about it, they are the good guys in their eyes, when in reality octavio is more in the grey area, hence the mix of tense and threatening parts compared to callies, which is most likely why he kidnapped her in the first place, kinda a ‘hey your happy and inspiring ig, make my people hope or something’ way. It really is a collab as well, like neither of them are going overboard on the other, they both get their moments and Octavio doesn't even rap at all, he’s just the backbeat, and when Callie takes a breather that’s when he goes ham with the beat, Splatoon3 Calamari Inkarnationen3MIX has its typical Octavio start, but now mixed with the new trio's national Instruments which once again shows his vast knowledge abt music, as shiver and Frye sing their asses off, Octavio took calamari incantation and MADE It more of an incantation, it’s a mix between Octarian music and inkling music, this is something completely different than what he usually makes, which shows he really likes this fucking song, (even though he denys it but that's cause he's salty) and wants to take it to its full potential, he even adds a little of the music that’s been playing at splatfests for years, like the whistles and drums, it also has much of an electric feel to it which is most likely conforming to frye, what I like most is the songs overall aura, like it gives off such a cocky yet hopeful vibe, he also makes sure to keep the notes relatively the same for Marie and Callie when they sing on their own, but the more they get into it the more hyped up the song gets, as they finish their lines, as it goes back to the singless jam, i love how like culturally aware he is, he’s like “aight, we got a throat singer, a theatrical singer, J-pop, and an inkling of African descent along with Big-man’s Brazilian ass, “ so he incorporates ALLL OF IT into one, and he does it in such a good way that none are overdoing the other, which like we Stan, he’s like “ok the inkling Jpop shit is getting old so, lemme yassify it losers" And fucking does it, it sounds like he listens to everyone’s fucking music and makes sure it all fits their vibe so they can give their best performances, which keep in mind this is playing when your SAVING THE WHOLE WORLD, so they better fucking be giving their best. Faintly at some points you can hear him say some stuff too, but it’s mixed in with the drops of notes so it’s hard to catch, I also love the back chorus, which he most likely got from his own people, it sounds practically “heavenly” which is what he calls the song on multiple occasions, so it makes sense. In conclusion I believe he picked up music more for his people than himself, but genuinely loving music and making it, it once brought hope to his people, and then finally in splatoon3 it’s bringing hope to everyone, which I think shows a huge character development in his case, I don’t think he helps you just to beat a common enemy, but because he wants to protect, and I find that very admirable, he really fits the title of king. i wrote this at 6AM after no sleep

#dj octavio #Splatoon #splatoon 3 #splatoon 2 #splatoon music #im autism #funny octopus go brr #callie #marie #squid sisters #deep cut #shiver #frye #big man #let him perform his remix like he deserves

[sasukeless]

while i do think part of late stage naruto writing was just to wrap things up, sasuke completely forgiving itachi really just shows that he will always be the little brother. i mean not just logically lol like the personality, the little brother that looks up to his big brother and looks up to him and looks to him for guidance, regardless of how right or wrong it is. like yes sasuke was gonna attack konoha when its the opposite of what itachi wanted, but in the end its still influenced by his feelings for itachi (non rom. obviously). itachi can do whatever he wants or thinks he has to do and sasuke will forgive him. meanwhile you have itachi who also will always see sasuke as the little brother, emphasis on little, controlling him and what he does, up to the very end, never seeing sasuke as a grown person that can make his own decisions or even considering why sasuke does what he does, always clouded by his unquestioning loyalty to konoha. i think ironically people calling him a genius really fucked with his intelligence since he always thinks hes in the right (planning on brainwashing his own baby brother??).

i think it would be super interesting to see a what-if scenario where itachi survives post-war and continues this. probably not to the same degree but you cannot tell me he would just suddenly go 'ok sasuke i trust you know whats right for you:)' there is just no fucking way. and sasuke having the time and space to actually think about how his big brother is not right, not just pushing it aside to blow konoha up in grief and anger. like actually getting to work these things out and. idk where im going with this. feel free to reply publicly

u really read my mind like to me itachi the worst case of Older Sister u will ever see but sasuke also is the worst case of little sister when u actually stop to think it through because he reallyyyy would forgive itachi for all and i cant say that doesnt makes sense. im a middle child but for the longest time i was the little sister and i know whats being on the spot of forgiving the worst things from my sister does even when i KNOW i wouldnt forgive that from anyone else (not to trauma dump here but i was literally outed by my own sister to my parents horribly and even if its one of my worst memories like Ever. i really forgave her the second she did it). like of course in sasuke and itachi’s case is soooo far worse and their power dynamic is so much more messed up but it makes complete sense to me i cant lie about that. and also i find their relationship one of the most compelling things in the manga along with sns because of that. its horrible but god if its not gut-wrenching. sasuke will ALWAYS deserve better in my eyes but his love for itachi is so so big and unfortunately for him itachi also loves him the same his problem is that his way of loving sasuke is soooo bad, that in the end even if its sad to see sasuke losing his brother a second time itachi dying is the Best outcome for both cus had he kept living his way to love sasuke would just have continued to mess with sasuke’s life. Like youre so rightt had itachi survived post war he wouldve NOT been suddenly become the best brother thats just not how he ever was w sasuke, even if he didnt saw it he wouldve kept trying to make sasuke follow the life path he puts for him, but also like u said i think w itachi alive and sasuke himself growing up he wouldve also on his own began to put his foot down too to itachi Worst Older Sister syndrome. because the thing about grief is that when u lose someone you love you dont want to think of the bad memories so it makes sense after itachi’s death sasuke refuses to think badly of him even if he has all the reasons, and keeps him STILL on that pedestal of older brother and its insane but like i said. i get it

#sorry i dont tgink i added much to what you say but Still

[unexpectedstormy]

Is Wild Actually Dink?

Bottom Line Up Front: I don’t think so. Here’s why.

I think that if Wild was potentially Dink or corrupted or something, there would have been a much more solid sign before now. It’s one of the rules of writing stories to foreshadow things to come, even if very subtly. If Wild was Dink or corrupted or something, we would have had a scene or a panel of the shadow sneaking up behind Wild in the woods, or Wild staring evilly at the potions he’s made, or Wild trying to pick up the shadow’s cursed weapon or something (which, as far as we know, is still chilling in the woods by the way).

In fact, we had the opposite. We’ve had panels that explain his behavior. We see him use logic and reasoning when he decided to fight the iron knuckle. We saw him witness Four’s split, (and getting no explanation for what was happening--does he even realize it was real??). We see him having a flashback and struggling to make sense of it; when realized he was losing it, he removed himself from the situation. In the woods, we watch him think and talk and rest and recover. When he returns to the group, we see him calmly giving a peace offering of potions (RIP Hopkins). When they go see their ailing brother, we can see from his expressions that his emotions are admittedly still a little raw and unsettled on the inside, but he maintains his composure. And in Twilight’s darkest hour and moment of greatest need, Wild is there for him and encourages him (and everyone else too) to keep fighting the good fight.

“But his behavior these last few updates—! But his expression in the last panel—!”

You gotta remember, in the life experiences department, Wild basically still a toddler.

We know canonically in LU he’s 117, or 17 minus the nap. How long has it been since he woke up? Months? Years? If I had to guess, I’d say no more than two years. (That would put him at being a knight, facing the Calamity, basically dying at 15 years old, and waking up a century later at 115. Then he goes on his adventure and later meets up with the gang and now he’s 17.)

At best, that’s like 2 years of memories and life experience to go off of. Yes, he does have the added benefit of waking up as a teen with a greater learning capacity than an infant and having a past life still somewhat shaping the way he thinks even if it is subconscious, but still… That’s… not a lot of time or opportunity to learn emotional regulation skills, especially if no one taught him and he had to learn on his own.

From what we know, this is probably Wild’s first time facing the death of someone he actually remembers, knows personally, and loves dearly. It’s only natural that he’s having Big Emotions that he’s having a hard time understanding, controlling, and articulating. This is the first time a tragedy like this has happened to him in his (remembered) life! To be honest, I think he’s actually doing really well for someone in his situation. (There’s no way I’d be as resolved and composed if I were in his place even with my 20+ years of life experience.)

And besides, if he were Shadow!Wild, wouldn’t he have tried to force his way past Four or even hurt or kill him when he found him alone in the courtyard? Wouldn’t he have tried to finish the job and kill Twilight when he had the opportunity? (Sure, he could have been biding his time waiting for a better moment to strike, or maybe waiting for the poisoned potion to do it’s dirty work, but if that were the case, why encourage Twilight to fight at all? Why cheer everyone up? Why not keep his mouth shut and let everyone be discouraged and resigned to Twilight’s dark fate?)

And at the end, why was Wild leaving the room while everyone else stayed with Twilight? Because the dang boy’s emotions are resting on a knife’s edge. He’s barely holding it together as it is. That weird expression on his face in the last panel I interpret as him hysterically riding the high of actually succeeding to encourage Twilight to keep fighting, lifting the spirits of the others, and getting Time’s “good job.” He’s leaving the room because he’s overstimulated, emotionally overwrought, and can’t handle anything more, good or bad. And he feels free to leave Twilight’s side because he finally has hope that Twilight will be okay.

So to put a long story short, these are not the thoughts and actions of an impersonated or corrupted hero. These are the thoughts and actions of a distressed and struggling young man, but one who is very brave and very strong in the face of such hardship. Wild is doing his best, and I think he’s doing just fine.

#linked universe #lu wild #sunset pt 13 #stormy speaks #850-word wild analysis post

[stardustlyssa]

Does Marlow ever confront Steve about the questionable actions of the Emperor's Coven? Obviously he's a very nice guy on an individual level but the EC is doing v bad things and I was wondering what Marlow's opinions of all that stuff was (yay for more TOH OC and Steve content!! Keep it up)

The thing about Marlowe is that she is a total pushover. So confrontation and even vocally opposing things can be extremely difficult for her. More details below the cut :)

For context, Marlowe was basically a pushover from birth. Ironically, her identical twin, Maeve, was the polar opposite, turning out to be a complete spitfire. Being twins, they have a very strong bond and connection despite their differences. Maeve unintentionally became Marlie's voice growing up, defending her and pushing her to follow the path she wanted to take instead of their mother's demands. Unfortunately because of this Marlie never really learned how to stand up for herself.

When she's branded, it destroys her self esteem and physical wellbeing as well. I personally headcanon that different coven sigils take more magic than others, since not all magic forms in the show require the same amounts of power or any magic at all (like potions). Marlowe had an inclination for bard magic before this and intended to become a bard before multiple changes in her life (story for another post), and the sigil drained all of that power. She lost not only her singing voice and ability to whistle or even hum, but also found that her normal voice was weakened as well. Marlowe also loses a lot of strength from the sigil and becomes prone to fainting spells because of the extreme change. The loss of her ability to sing crushes her to the point that she cannot even listen to music anymore. All she can do is cry when she hears it.

Marlowe does question covens because of this. She had everything ripped away from her because her mother begged her to keep the family business open while she was ill. She doesn't understand how witches can be happy when they lose parts of themselves with a brand. But she also doesn't want to question the unknown. She fears the things that she doesn't know for certain because they are out of her control, and as a natural follower she feels she can't truly understand what would be "best" for witches.

She asks Steve questions, like what he would do if he wasn't in the Emperor's coven, or if he was a wild witch, or if he could only pick one magic. Honestly, for Steve, learning how much Marlowe's sigil has taken from her makes him feel like he's doing something wrong. The first time they pass a bard performing on the street and he sees Marlie pause, big tears immediately spilling out of her eyes as she hears the sounds and magic coursing through the air. Learning that she can barely even yell because her voice was taken from her. He probably went to Hexside at the same time as her but never knew her, having left early to join the coven. But maybe he sees a recording of her when she was still in the Bard track on Penstagram. She's singing and smiling bigger than he's ever seen her do before, she looks so much more alive. And he feels like shit even if it's not his fault.

Now, the person who WOULD confront him is Marlowe's twin, Maeve. Though she is a proud Beastkeeping coven witch, Maeve is a vocal skeptic after seeing her sister change due to her sigil. She never understood Belos anyways, or why everyone had to conform in one way or another. Her opinions have landed her in hot water, but never beyond a stern warning from scouts.

It would be intense. Maeve doesn't get to visit often with her work (she's a professional ratworm racer) so she has no idea why her sister is hanging out with one of the Emperor's lackeys. Marlie would try to explain and Steve would probably try to be friendly, but Maeve would not hold back.

"Besides the fact that you kiss the but of that old geezer, you're part of the reason why my sister can't sing anymore. She cried for DAYS. Nothing I did could help her. She can't even cast a levitation spell without feeling winded. Do you get some sort of sick ego trip from being around her when you can use any kind of magic you want?! Or are you using her for her kindness just like the last person did?"

Maeve just wants to protect her sister. All of her experiences with coven scouts were riddled with rude, callous treatment, so she expects the same from Steve. Steve for the most part is speechless because really he doesn't know what to say in response to everything thrown at him. Surprisingly, Marlie would probably be the one to respond and stop her sister. Telling her Steve saved her and walks her home to keep her safe. Marlie even scolds her sister softly for blaming him when he didn't brand her.

It's a bit awkward and Maeve is still unsure about Steve, but probably tells him what she's felt and experienced as Marlowe's sister and watching her struggle. That would really eat at Steve, being a brother himself. He understands she's worried about Marlowe especially because they can't see each other often, he experiences the same thing in his own life when he worries about Matt. He would tell her that he never knew about the sigils harming people, and that being a scout was different than he expected. He doesn't know how he feels about everything but he wants to help other people and doesn't always agree with his coworkers because of their attitudes. And most importantly he would never think about hurting Marlowe-- he's happy to keep her safe and walk her home and loves the time he spends with her.

Maeve feels better knowing her sister has someone looking out for her who genuinely cares about her, and Marlowe is just happy her sister didn't try to fight Steve.

But yeah, Marlowe has a sister who looks out for her and Steve is a good listener who begins to realize the coven system and emperor have hurt a lot of people when he spends time with Marlie.

#toh #the owl house #steve toh #oc #oc x canon #toh oc #the owl house oc #oc asks

[panlight]

Anon if you please! I'm curious: you've mentioned tropes you don't like, stuff like Supernatural Pregnancies and Super Advanced Kids, and how you're not really into the superpowers stuff, what are some of your favorite fantasy/paranormal tropes?

Oof. Hmm. Well, I love me some ironic and/or karmic transformations. I think that's why Carlisle's backstory fascinates me more than anyone else's because like he was a vampire-hunting son-of-a-preacher-man who became a vampire! That's so deliciously sad and horrific and fraught and just 1000% more interesting to me than Bella's whole fairy tale vampirism deal.

Also related to Carlisle's backstory: super willpower. I just love that stuff. Gets me every time, in every story, when someone is able to resist this allegedly unstoppable supernatural urge/instinct/force, and it's a big part of why Jacob's story is so unsatisfying to me, because he had seemed to have been set up to RESIST the imprinting and instead he imprints on a half-vampire baby and now his life is perfect. Nooooo! That is the OPPOSITE of what I want! I wanted to see him fight it and win, like he fought Sam's alpha order and started his own pack! (Doesn't apply to Bella because she didn't like, have to try. She was just instantly in control and thus it was boring.)

I love found family stuff--doesn't have to be in a supernatural setting but that does add an extra dimension. Helping each other through this strange new life they're stuck in and all that. Works with both the Cullens and the wolf shifters.

And just . . . bittersweet. Give me all the bittersweet. Breaking Dawn fails for me because it's just over-the-top wish fulfillment, Bella getting everything she could ever want and even things she didn't know she wanted and it's just . . . blech. But Esme losing her baby but getting this big adoptive family is interesting. It's bittersweet. She still lost something big, and she still didn't get exactly what she wanted. Rosalie losing the chance at a husband and children that she longed for, but finding happiness with Emmett. Again, it's not everything, there's still a lot of bitter with the sweet. Carlisle creating this very human-like life for himself, with a job, and house, and wife and kids . . . but he still has to go to the woods and kill things and drink blood. All of that is way more interesting to me than Bella's 'perfect piece of forever' stuff.

Also limits and weaknesses! Twilight is majorly missing this. In most fantasy worlds, sure, you might have some overpowered creatures, but there's usually something that can counter them, or some rules that bind them. There's really nothing in Twilight to limit the powers of the vampires other than flimsy rules about not giving the secret away which are Super Important sometimes and other times SM seems to forget they exist (justifies an elaborate car chase sequence because Secrecy, but then we can go to a hospital with a doctor Carlisle knew 14 years ago, when Carlisle still looks 23. Sure. Fine. Whatever). I'm talking things like powerful supernatural beings who are confined/trapped by something, or they have a weakness to the sun/silver/whatever. Something that humbles them, something the human characters can wield to protect themselves.

#asks

[kindan-no-kanojo]

💫 + guilty pleasure <3 here to learn all the secrets

send me a 💫 + a topic and i'll drop a random piece of info about my character

Let me tell you about Scarlett's obsessive liking for kisses<3

As opposed to something that should build up until the tension is released with a kiss between two people, the truth is that Scarlett doesn't always feel it that way. Or never, actually. Yes, a silly friend's kiss feels so different from a lover's kiss, but no one's got time for that relationship development, she wants the kiss now!!

But why?

While, yes, as the kind of demon she is, her touch might get violent and aggressive in a second, there are little chances of her harming someone on purpose, at least she won't without a good reason. Hurting? Maybe, but not deliberately harming. When control lacks, it's hard to differentiate, but one little hint of hope is present when there is trust. And so, one way to touch and be touched while also safely feeling pleasure and emotional relief are kisses. One could say that after being trapped in a loop of negative feelings, Scarlett found that kisses give her the reverse effect, so she wants more, so much more of it.

Character-wise, Scarlett still struggles to accept most of the nice, pleasurable feelings in a positive way without taking them as intrusive for being so hard to manage. However, she won't reject those that make her feel undeniably good.

Kisses feel good: the proximity and the taste of one another, the increase in one's heartbeat or the fuzzy feeling in her chest despite her lack of the normal functions of a human heart... She is still able to feel, but the sensations in her body are way easier to acknowledge than the ones in her mind, which she is unable to control, see, or even put a proper name to. She loves to have someone close enough to feel them breathing, moving, reacting, living next to her, oh-so close. An ironic way of touch starvation, she aches for the chance to touch, not so much to be touched, and see how the other reacts, lets her act, trusts her, and responds.

Needless to say, when in love, kisses become not only more special, stimulating and yearning, but also a little less frequent. She'd seek other forms of affection, physical or otherwise, for kisses to not lose what makes the special. Additionally, a kiss with someone she adores hits 100 times harder, so they deserve to be glorified.

The symbolic side of this revolves around the metaphoric parallel of kissing and eating. I've read so many analogies about kissing being the beginning of emotional cannibalism, kisses awakening a voracious craving, a specific type of hunger that never gets satisfied and only grows the more you eat. I like to subtly implement that in her character, because not only it's so fitting to her race but also it goes perfectly with that insatiable sensation she experiences.

Naturally, random kisses don't provide a lot of that emotion. It's not a feeling she can get from a stranger, or in situations where she's uncomfortable— like when she's angry, irritated or in clear discomfort with the other person; it actually can get the complete opposite effect, boost the negative emotion for using something so precious in such a bad moment.

Outside of that, Scarlett loves kissing. Then again, in spite of everything mentioned, she's not the most experienced kisser, and might get easily overwhelmed when someone kisses her out of the blue. Ghouls hardly ever get any affection, she's no exception. While she won't force a kiss, out of self-preservation, she's most likely always wanting one.

Also. Rough kisses may be her favorite, but gentle kisses?? They touch a specific part of her heart that isn't supposed to be touched, so they need to be careful because being unable to control herself can be dangerous——

People may get confused, but kisses simply have a very different meaning to her. Perhaps that's why it is a guilty pleasure, because the more she does it the less meaningful it can get for whoever is in the other end, and not everyone can get why she does it and loves doing it anyway. But, what are emotions anyway? She can't understand them either, so let her feel in a raw way until she figures them out.

TL;DR; Kissing makes her feel as though she gets to eat someone while simultaneously being able to keep them alive, unharmed and still by her side when it's over, giving the illusion that she isn't the demonic cannibalistic creature she was shaped to be.

...She is though but she can pretend she isn't in the middle of a harmless kiss.

#📭asklett #scarlett wakahisa #starry-nocturne #.im sobbing i wanted to write about kisses for so long dkfjd;; #.smooch her so much until she gets tired of it and has no other option but to love you 😤 #💫brainrot #👁‍🗨. about

[mysticbewitched]

hello mystic, tomorrow is the first day back at school but i don't want to go AT ALL. i won't talk about my school situation that much here but overall, i don't fit in, feel like an outcast and have zero friends. the people there are honestly shallow and i don't relate to them or their conversations at all but anyways, i want to manifest another few weeks off school but last time i tried manifesting that, it didn't work and ended up going to school which ruined my mood the whole day. also, the 3D is constantly showing me the opposite of what i want (e.g. my mum telling me to go to bed early, having to iron my uniform, setting my alarm early to wake up, etc.) and it's messing with my mind and making myself excessively doubt. i'm going to bed soon and i'm dreading school tomorrow but i truly want to manifest my desire. do you have any advice for me to be more confident in myself and believe that i won't attend school tomorrow?? thank you for reading this, i truly appreciate it

I want to start this off by saying that my fellow outcasts are definitely my kind of people and I personally think they're the coolest individuals because they stand out from the crowd.

It's so much more awesome to stand out than to fit in.

Screw fitting in, honestly.

Be wild, be unique, and most importantly, be true to yourself.

You are awesome and we have the same view points when it comes to dealing with people who do fit in the crowd.

Now to answer your question.

The best way to develop more faith and confidence in yourself and your own abilities will always be to continuously test these teachings for yourself.

Test it out and see the magic happen.

You want to keep proving your own power to yourself by manifesting as many desires as you can, so you end up reaching the point of undaunted faith in yourself as the operant power. You will become so confident and certain in your abilities that nothing in the "external" world will ever be able to break you or make you lose faith in yourself.

You will inevitably come to realize that you truly are the creator of your reality and you are in complete control of your very own world. You call all the shots and you have the incredible power to manifest absolutely anything you want.

There are no limits to your power.

Start somewhere.

Even through the self-doubt, the worries, uncertainty - start somewhere because that's much better than staying stuck in limbo and wondering to yourself, "What if?"

Dare to assume your desires

Dare to take a leap of faith

What do you have to lose?

Just start and watch your confidence blossom.

#loassumption #law of assumption #manifestation #manifesting #law of manifestation #neville goddard