#im wasting my time again

[manygreetingsfriend]

i’m sooooooo normal about the god of war series. so incredibly normal i liked it a normal amount and would be so chill talking about it. don’t worry about the sign

#god of war #i’m so so so so so normal about it it’s so whatever it’s so haha you know #something something when it comes to yourself you’ll let yourself drown before you change. you’ll die before you change who you’ve become #to survive this long #up to and until it affects the ones you’ve come to love in this life you’ve made for yourself and you suddenly have no choice but to change #it’s fine it’s ok it’s chill. everyone does this. #it’s becoming a parent and loving your child so much you HAVE to change. you HAVE to be better #we MUST be better. than they were. #who’s they. our parents. the gods that come before us. yes. #i’m screaming i’m crying i’m wasting away im disintegrating. there’s no coming back there no return #you are on your knees. you are gripping your son’s shoulders like they’re the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth. #you are struggling with who you are and who you want to become. you are promising to be better. #i’m so normal about parent(al figures) taking responsibility for their actions and choosing to do better #i’m not high enough to really express what’s going on here. can you feel it? can you fucking feel it? #this series has destroyed me. #dad of boy. dad(s) of boy. i will never be the same (affectionate) #can’t remember the last time i finished a series and went ‘oh well i’ve GOT to play it again Now That I Know’ #AND I HAVENT EVEN TALKED ABOUT THE BROTHER HULDRA!!!!!!!!! #sindri’s face. has not left my memory #i’m dying scoob #gow #gowr

[strawbubbysugar]

my 25th birthday is coming up and im oddly nervous about it

every year im like oh this year it feels like its a real adulthood year

like 20 isnt an adult, you just left teens!

21 isnt an adult, you just got to drink in the US!

22 isnt an adult, its like being 11, there are two twos!

23 isnt an adult, you just finished being 22!

24 might be an adult, but youre still so young!

and now 25 is like. Im not worried so much about being old, 25 is in no way shape or form old

im mostly worried about the fact that 26 comes after it. then 27. then 28. and one day ill be 30. and then i will be 30, and i can never go back to being 25 ever again

its the permanence of it

#personal #this isnt sadge btw #this is just me thinkin aloud #im going to be in my mid 20s #i can never be in my early 20s again #have i wasted them? #no #im happy #i love my life #and no time spent happy is wasted

[princehoneytea]

sorry no art in a hot second... ive been really burnt out for a long time now and its been miserable, ive been looking for a normie job for ages so that i can make art something i do for myself again and i havent had much luck but.

i have good news now.

#YIPPEEEEEE #cant wait to see how this effects my relationship with my art #freelancing is hard. im excited to be creative for myself again #prince talks #ideally id want to work in the cartoon industry but its looking rough right now and im already having a hard enough time #but its never too late to try to achieve your dreams #so im just putting it on the backburner for now #have to take care of myself instead of being so worried about 'wasting my life' or whatever because its just making me miserable #LIFE HAS VALUE NO MATTER WHAT DAMMIT #oh btw i will still be taking comms i just wont be making it like. #my only source of income #bc that SUCKED. #i love doing comms. dont love how unstable it is

[mainapnifavouritehoon]

hi guys i-

#Hey so i wanted to talk about this really bad this has been bothering me for quite some time #i have been busy a lot these days and i dont get time at all to do anything but i can see myself wasting my time just scrolling #I have school and then coaching and then ofc i have to study on my own for which i barely take out time as im highly careless #My last 2 exams went absolute shit and that fucking scares me because i'll be having my JEE soon #Mummy has been telling me to stay away from my phone and ik she trusts me but she but she deserves a daughter that studies ig? #And now i kind of consider that as an option because this phone is very very distracting #I have been thinking about deactivating but i realized it would mean i would lose all my precious posts and interactions #So i wont be deleting this blog as i am too attached (i will be coming back istg) #I will be taking a break and ig thats what yall call a hiatus #I will be giving away my phone to my parents (trust me i have to) #Ik this will be hard for me to just leave all of a sudden so i'll slowly start vanishing if that makes sense? #This message also doesnt mean that i will be shutting down my phone rn at this moment and that this is goodbye #This is just to prepare the people that i love and who love me that i will be highly inactive and not come online for maybe months #This is not an impulsive decisions i have really thought through this #Also just to tell you again MAIN ABHI GAYAB NAHI HONE WAALI BUT THODE TIME MEIN I WILL GO ON A BREAK THIS IS JUST A PRE HIATUS MESSAGE #Also i hope you guys will still love me and remember me once i come back #Because coming months are going to be hard for me #I hope you understand and ily guys okay? #(Oh god why am i so dramatic about everything) xoxo

[enden-k]

my only day off and i wanted to draw but instead i slept my evening away bc my migraines kicked in fully and meds didnt work 💀

#didnt do workout or art today no....just slept in then played a lil then napped more then read a bit then slept again.... #im still goign to draw now or at least try but man....sm free time wasted....... #give me 3 days with human contact and i will die from my migraines and exhaustion uwa.. #i really am not made for dealing with ppl its tiresome to act n mask all day n stuff #also the weather SUCKS it was so amazing and warm and sunny and then it switched to storms and coldness!!!! prob another reason why i felt #unwell today and yesterday eugh lit goes to the head #aughhh anw.......getting to draw....getting to draw... #babbles #tbd

[compacflt]

wip wednesday: going thru my corny arc

#OKAY im back #sorry! working overtime pre paris airshow #i think I’m going to focus on this 80k of wips right now—just get them posted by the end of the summer #but u can keep sending in prompts if u want #and maybe someday I’ll actually be brave/creative enough to finish an AU #1. the frankly inevitable sickfic #2. this shit is so fucking corny but i literally can’t resist it anymore i just want them to say it all the time #3. have been slowly realizing lately that I’ve been slacking on how much the uranium mission probably fucked mav up #4. he is afraid of getting old & dying all over again #top gun #top gun maverick #pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #icemav #top gun fanfiction #there’s so much thematic meat to be unpacked with ice’s cancer & eventual death #and I am sacrificing that thematic meat for my own mental health. #so you’re getting my analysis of mav’s death instead because i simply refuse to engage with an unhealthy ice #i know it’s wasted thematic potential & im sorry but i like 😭😭😭😭😭😭 cannot do it #we all have our little neuroses and ice’s death is mine #sorry I’m still in my ‘italicize dialogue to suggest surreality’ phase #i can literally track the very concrete ways my writing style has changed over the course of writing this series it RULES #progress!!!!!

[junkdyke]

i do believe that pursuing romantic connection at all times and making it top priority is a huge distraction and gets in the way of so much. I've seen it happen with myself, and I've seen it happen with friends, where it takes away from everything you could and should be doing. Going on a trip that should be fun, but you're crying and feeling down the whole time because you're concerned with how that person is texting you. Not focusing on work or projects because you're so preoccupied with trying to see this person or stressing about how things are going with them. And you don't see how much it takes away from your life until you really eliminate it as a factor altogether. I've had chunks of my life put off because romantic pursuits came first. I've seen people wanting more for themselves, but not working on that because they're putting all their effort and energy into another person instead. Months later, still single and still not working on their career or going learning the skill they talked so much about.

The best people to date imo are people who are their own complete selves. Who have worked on themselves and their lives so they have something going on, something they're passionate about or proud of. Ambitions, goals, or a love for something that fulfills them. If you seek fulfillment in someone else, you will get burned. Be okay with being by yourself. Become the kind of person who simply wants someone else, not needs someone else.

And work on your friendships!!!

#being single and truly working on your own shit will have you valuing your peace so much #like i never want this disrupted again you need to be reeeal worth it to enter my kingdom of solitude #watching my friends be miserable and let their work go to the wayside because of women #it was like looking in a mirror from where i used to be #so much time wasted when i could have been working on art but i was crying over girls instead!! #the most attractive people to me are ones i meet who are like “i do this this and this and im single cause i choose to be” #i want somebody with as much ambition and an individual life as i do #never having someone live vicariously through me again lmao #single thoughts #wlw #lesbian dating #dykeposting #mine

[dilfpassing]

In a perfect world I'd sit down and make art all day long but unfortunately I am afflicted with executive functioning issues and many mental illnesses which prevent me from using my leisure time productively

#i wasted basically my whole day today #i got a little done but nothing for ME #and then this week im BUSY doing shit i dont WANT to do #monday i stay an hour late at work and then have class an hour after that #and once im done class im so pissed off and theres no time to do anything worthwhile #then tuesday i have plans with my aunt that i cant miss bc its instructions for future pet sitting plans #wednesday i have free time but im going to spend it on commissions and then i have a yoga class in the evening #then thursday i have class again #RAAAHHH #friday i have plans too #and saturday #and sunday #i just want to draw #screaming and crying i have so many ideas but no drive or time to complete then

[ectonurites]

ZACH TAYLOR & DARYL HARPER | HOLY GHOST BY MODERN BASEBALL

#my zach & mobo agenda strikes again #super dark times #zach taylor #daryl harper #charlie and josh are there briefly but. this is largely abt The Dream #sam edits #tw blood #tw stabbing #or well. pulling the blade out after a stabbing #also to ramble a sec bc i think using the ‘third wish has always been three more’ bit with the flashbacks may be confusing #using ‘a third wish to wish for three more’ feels like a plea for more chances to change things—smthn about #regretting the choices you made and wanting the opportunity to make better choices or #fix the previous ones. like… it feels like a line about hindsight/regret/wasted opportunity & chances #which to then apply that to Zach here—that is certainly the sort of stuff plauging his #subconscious in relation to how he handled the Daryl situation. even though awake!Zach is #obviously struggling to deal with The Guilt/the role he played in things (see: my post about #’blood on hands’ from the other night) his dream here literally SHOWS that this situation #with Daryl is crushing him (see: Daryl sitting on top of him) and a part of him KNOWS that #he is partially at fault (see: the copious blood all over him but the FOCUS on it on his hands) #+ the idea im getting at is: he not only wishes things could’ve gone differently but that HE could’ve DONE things differently

[freebooter4ever]

Meanwhile im still coping with being rejected and the subsequent solitude by dancing and eating unhealthy snacks while 'cleaning' my house \o/

#Freebooter4ever #I think i might unpause the o*nline d*ating again #But a bigger part of me is like whats even the point what the fuck do i have to offer #Like im just a waste of anyones time #i look so much like my mother from certain angles #she was roughly my age now in my earliest memories of her when she used to carry me and practice ballet in the living room

[kittenninja14]

Have any of yall done this? Where you spend like your entire day scrolling thru ur fav ppl's blog and just liked everything?

bc i have been wasting my entire evening going thru my favs' blogs and liking them all lol. rn on @ninja-knox-ur-sox-off's :P sorry dude for the spam activities lolll

anyways is that just me? or do yall also spend ur entire time scrolling thru blogs? loll

#but like i have HOMEWORK dude #and im wasting time liking everything #AAHDUYCGWODFAN O #talk about time management #ughhh #ig i have to godspeed thru my hw tmrw during lunch #...again #and here i am complaining that “i DoN't HaVe TiMe” #uh huh #suree #sighhh i need help loll #anyways time for real tags ig #KN14 rambles #update #tumblr stuff #KittenNInja14 #knox is mentioned loll #<- I honestly cant believe how many times I've used this tag already #loll

[zexonyte]

yeah i made him a fish lookin thang whatcha gonna do about it

#mother series #giegue #earthbound beginnings #yeah im proud of this so im putting it on tumblr too. hiii mother times server how yall doing #ignore that he doesnt have a back leg i tried but it looked kinda weird and cramped #anyways i gave giegue gill things and a more fish-esque appearance because i hc his species is aquatic #like they come from an oceanic? aquatic? unsure. well its a planet that is almost entirely water im talkin subnautica levels of sea #that's why he had that capsule orb thing in mother 1. he needs it to live and the weird engine-esque things at his side are like purifiers #making sure the liquid is suitable. not too focused on much else (why bother when you're a super powerful psychic) but isn't exactly fragil #like the material is flexible and rubbery even. you hit it and it bounces back a good amount #we don't really get an explanation for why earth itself was chosen to get invaded. at least i don't remember if there was one sorry 😭 BUT #i hc also that the reason giegue's species decided to invade here specifically was because of territory. i mean we've got a lot of water #maybe they took george and maria to test humanity in a sense. if they reacted positively to an alien child mayybe they wouldnt have needed #to straight up eradicate humanity maybe this time we wont need to fight too much. would be inconvenient to waste firepower on these #simple creatures. they're not even that smart. can't even use our epic brain powers lol (aged real well) #once again they aint found him yet but when they do they gon be surprised #anyways its like 4 in the morning i cant keep doing this. thanks for reading my brainworms over a game ive never played 🤙

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#tis i! tragic daughter one of three! #motherless at age 26 #the last wake was today and this was more fun than the 1st. more casual. my moms childhood friends were there #ans it was fun to catch up with my uncle and his side of the family #i feel so weird tho. bc ppl r asking how we r and like genuinely i feel fine most of the time #like my sister is like: i sacrificed so much for my mom and i saw her downslide into death #and im like yea i fucked off to [redacted state] and showed uo after the horrible part was over #and bc im finally on medication i really feel better than i have possibly ever. so its just weird #weird to br at my mother's wake and think: god ive wasted so much fucking time being miserable. i dont want to do that anymore #and i feel like thats an option now. i mean ill always be frustrated by the same things. the difficulty reading and focusing #and the lack of social ease. but it feels like less of a big deal now #i say that now before im entrenched in school again. but idk. its just weird #but idk i love my mom but there was distance there and i have weird insect brain which i think makes it hurt less #i dunno. maybr ill feel it more later. when im on my own again #its just that i never reached out to her. i didnt realy on her and she didnt reach out to me so now things won't change much #i dunno. well see #unrelated

[significant-ace-nnoyance]

interrupting your regular programming to bring you a special message: stop. whatever you're doing right now. stop and go watch everything everywhere all at once. i dont care if you "dont have multiple hours to spare" do it. i dont care if you've "already seen it" watch it again???? "ive seen it 5 times" watch it a 6th time ???????? even better watch it a 7th ?????? literally what could you be doing that's more important than seeing this masterpiece before you and sobbing your fucking soul out??????

i thought so.

#somebody sedate me because that movie makes me BAJDFLKBdfksKjagsdJHFsdLKfgjsaklJAFGALSKJGD #if you cant tell i just watched it again #holy shit #im too incoherent right now to offer any meaningful thoughts #just #no other movie has made me cry with SNOT and TEARs drIPPPING down my face because of a single LINE a single LOOK #a single SHOT OF TWO PLANETS COLLIDING AND A ROCK FALLING OFF A CLIFF KILL ME NOW #everything everywhere all at once #this has been your psa #youre welcome #or sorry #both #this movie will hurt you and heal you in the most innovative incredible way #hate the fucking oscars drive them into the ground but at least they gave this movie the recognition it fucking DESERVES #also stephanie hsu is CRIMINALLY underrated holy sHIT her performance #anyways ill stop yapping im just wasting your time in which you could be watching this movie #do it #michelle yeoh #EATS DOWN in this movie #as she always does but HOLY SHIT thats an actress right there thats what talent MEANS #also waymond <3 oh my godfkljadkljg that man makes me cry #ke huy quan #DEVOURS as waymond also #anyone who bitches about this movie is genuinely willingly stupid stop boring us with your whining and go WATCH IT #anyways #eeaao