#idk how to process that info

[snowpoon]

tried to keep my mind off my exams for a bit and it did not work ‼️☝️

#welcome home puppet show #wally darling #welcome home wally #wally darling fanart #welcome home art #wally darling welcome home #wally welcome home #wally fanart #exams are next week #also fionna and cake just ended #idk how to process that info #they doomed my yuri ship #simon and betty deserved better i hate them i love them *SOBS* #i need to see an alternative ending #probably in my dreams #so im going to sleep right now #goodnight everynyan

[transmascissues]

i totally understand why some people have read my posts about my recovery experience and been a bit freaked out by it if they haven't gotten top surgery themselves yet, and i also totally understand other people who have had top surgery wanting to reassure those people so they don't get scared out of having top surgery.

what i don't love is when, in an attempt to be reassuring, other people who have had top surgery say "well, my experience was much easier than this and yours might be too. don't be scared of having this kind of recovery, because you might not!"

if you had a super smooth top surgery recovery, i'm so happy for you and i'll be the first to admit that i envy you. i'm genuinely glad you got lucky! but i also know that, when i was preparing for top surgery, i wanted to know how to prepare for if i did have a rougher time and need more support, because being pleasantly surprised by a better time than you expected is much easier than being unpleasantly surprised by difficulties no one prepared you for. trying to find out how to prepare and being met with varying degrees of "don't worry, that didn't happen to me" was infuriating. the chorus of "that didn't happen to me" didn't do anything for me when one day post-op it took three people to figure out how to lift me into a sitting position without hurting me, and i never want anyone to find themselves in a situation like that totally unprepared. i worked really hard to get ready because i'm disabled and knew my body never has a chill reaction to anything, and i want other people to be able to prepare themselves too, whether they have a specific reason to or not.

not to mention, nothing in my experiences so far has been some worst case scenario that you should pray never happens to you. none of the things i've described in my posts have been complications; it's all just natural parts of recovering. every single time my surgeon has seen me, she's assured my that i'm healing perfectly so far. so yeah, things have been rough, but this isn't a horror story that i'm telling. it's not a warning or a cautionary tale. it's all totally normal and expected, even if it is more intense than some people's experiences. it just doesn't feel great to have my experience treated as something awful when it's all just part of the process.

the confidence that comes with knowing what could happen and feeling ready to face it is such a powerful thing, and i want people to be able to have that going into their surgery. i want them to be able to trust in their knowledge of what could happen and feel equipped to handle whatever comes their way. i want them to know that it'll be worth it in the end, even if it's hard for a while. i want them to know that top surgery is a wonderful thing and is worth doing, even if it's a rough experience, and that they can have a hard time and still come out the other side thrilled with the outcome. i want them to be able to look that fear in the face and say "yeah, maybe it'll suck for a few weeks, but then i'll be so much happier for the entire rest of my life, so fuck it, let's do it."

if i've learned anything over the past week, it's that top surgery is scary but it's also so worth it. if it would make your life better, go for it. i promise, the fear will be worth it. and honestly? a lot of the scary shit isn't nearly as scary once you've experienced it and learned how to work with it.

#idk like. if your experience wasnt like mine go ahead and make your own post detailing how things went for you! #but maybe don't come onto my post and talk about your experiences as if they somehow contradict mine #don't act like i'm giving the Bad Scary Info and you have the Nice Reassuring Info that can make it all better #all of the information is important. all of it #and all of it - the really smooth recoveries and the really rough recoveries and everything in between - are just part of the process #it just. feels Bad #i'm gonna leave this mostly untagged for now i just wanted to put it out there #top surgery adventures

[coldflasher]

was rewatching the pilot again yesterday for fic reasons and thinking again about the sherlock-style screen annotations they had when barry was doing CSI work that they literally only did in the first ep and then never revisited again, presumably because they realized it'd be far too much effort to work out the details on such a precise level

and thinking about like. that barry allen with the hyper-precise exact measurements that he did by eye (with joe shaking his head in awe so you know that he's a CSI supergenius) vs. the leonard snart who timed his heists to the exact nanosecond (which again, presuming they ditched because it's a logistical nightmare to write dialogue that nitpicky and obsessive, and would be such a fucking pain to do on a week-to-week basis). like. yet another reason they are soulmates tbh. is audhd4autistic a thing the same way t4t is a thing? if it isn't then i'm making it a thing

#never noticed it before i became obsessed w autism but pilot barry is SCREAMING “stereotypical tv depiction of white male autistic savant” #like even the cadence of his speech and the level of clumsiness and social awkwardness was ramped up to an 11 in the pilot #literally i only watched half the ep and he accidentally bumped into like 4 people. #like... the lack of spatial awareness... he's so me. they really did go “the speedforce cured his appalling proprioception" #part of me is glad they dialled some of it back cos like. tv loooves to code characters as autistic in that very specific #way that's like. a big old stereotype. but then be like “wdym you interpret him as autistic. disgusting that you'd say that. die.” #but idk i also kinda liked it... again im ultimately glad they didn't stick w the sherlock-style annotation bc it would make writing casefi #SO much more difficult than it already is just in terms of like. how do you show that kind of thought process in a non-visual medium #in a way that's not incredibly boring and info-dumpy? #but i do have a soft spot for like. early seasons disaster barry allen who can't walk across a flat surface without crashing into something #and has no idea how to have a normal human conversation #my meta

[redroseworks]

Im scared to ask but can someone tell me whats going on in Gotham war but in terms like you're explaining to a toddler to not hurt their little brain

#im the toddler w little brain #i saw that some shit is going on with jason and idk what it means #i dont know how to process the info and i dont want to read that mess #gotham war

[murderbees]

thinking about Tron program bodies again, blood is not enough for me, where are the wires and fans and plates of metal that bend and snap

I have this vague image of an anatomical diagram of a program

Energy Circulatory System - the Blood, also the digestive track bc they don't have food, Mouth to throat tube to processor located center, near the disk port, it processes and then pumps the energy through the lightlines of the body, if a program overclocks themselves enough, they can suffer burnt or even ruptured circuitry

Energy both fuels the program and cools them off, when cooling processes are activated, the energy will be cooled off by nearby venting processes and will then be circulated throughout the body

Venting System - Similar looking to lungs, two fans that sit within the upper chest, one on each side, subtle ducts can open along the sides of a program to release extra heat (they sorta look like gills, ticklish), Most of the cooling is done through this system, Vents work to expell air through the nose, mouth, and additional vents and ducts, some programs have extra vents for their functions (Mechanic need more bc they work in hotter environments)

The Disc Port - connected directly to the morherboard of the program, this is why if programs are hit there, they will derezz, sorta like a brain (head wounds are not fatal), all processors are connected via wires to the board

Processors - part of the motherboard, eyes, ears, nose, tongue, all the senses are split up into different processing units, These usually have a mechanical unit, like eyeballs, that connect to the board with long thin wires, essentially the nervous system, but centered around the disc not the head

Internal Systems - internal sensors and diagnostics that regulate the body, the Endocrine System, Connected to a programs personal display, will update with warnings and display whatever parameters needed about the body

"Bones" - programs don't have bones, but they do have metal tubes that house their more delicate pieces (wires), Some programs (security) have more reinforcement around vulnerable areas, like the throat and chest, with the plating sometimes even being above the skin, Additonal plating can be added to the forearms and calves without much modification, further integrated armor is an arduous process

Derezzing is still a thing, parts of a program will maintain integrity to a point, then they collapse into voxels, Not all pieces will derezz, if that threshold isn't met, the pieces will remain in their form, basically, if you want to fully derezz a program you have to grind them into voxels, otherwise the bones and other stuff are unlikely to derezz until the energy runs completely out (usually a few days, or the Grid equivalent), where they will then turn into a pile of voxels

Voxels and Energy both evaporate, losing their vivid technicolor hues, until they turn a dark soot grey, at this point they disappear leaving a thin dusty film behind, it's hard to clean and slippery

#does this count as gore??? #btw idk how computers work so Im just making this up #If you have suggestions or info on how computers actually work please add bc it would be cool #Tron hc #I guess? #I want programs to have adaptations that fit their function and environment better #mechanics who work in tight and hot spaces with additonal vents and more efficient venting processes #Security with additional armor like an insect carapace #Medics with advanced processors and sensors for diagnostic purposes #aerial programs with better energy circulatory systems to cope with the forces

[1o1percentmilk]

remember when wordle came out and every programmer and their mother was making algorithms to automate guessing it. those were good times

#ok only i remember because in 2022 i basically lived in the computer lab. #it's actually kind of an interesting algorithm #mmn #i think its a process of elimination thing #ok structures - list of all possible 5-letter words - so list of string.. very possibly represented as list of 5-idx char arrays #n pre-order the list based on best guesses. idk how to do this some informaiton theory thing *waves hands* #i just dont want to go thru the hassle of trying to find the statistical best guess every round too. i'm 100% sure it's possible #-for someone smarter than me #we'll make it start with the statistically best word. uhh what was it. #'CRANE' < i know 3b1b put out another video correcting but im too lazy to look it up #oh ok i'll use penis. 'PENIS' #then.. for each guess.. get info on what possible letters r there n in what positions.. n thenbased on that iterate thru the original list #-and create a copy of it BUT JUST THE WORDS THAT STILL WORK - throw out the bad ones #uhh yeah go thru that list n pick the first valid word from that list #repeat until the game spits out 5 green boxes #yah #yap #ok i go back to drawing

[hwiyoungies]

was talking to my mom about how the adoption process worked when they adopted my brother and man some people truly are just scum

#all of their process was basically public? since there wasn't a private institution back then (not sure how it is now) #so it was basically women who were 100% sure they were going to give their baby away no matter what #and then when the day came they were like noo i'm keeping the baby (which should be good right?) #and then they would do a follow up and turns out there was no baby because they were basically sold illegally #obviously to people that were not from chile #because what um hospitals? no it's not hospitals but adjacent i guess #what they would do is that they would have a program basically were pregnant women would be like hey this kid once they're born? #i'm gonna abandon them basically. so they hospital would get in contact with the social service #the social service would contact people that wanted to be parents. the they would come and there was no baby because they were sold #obviously didn't happen to my parents but what did happen was the social service lady asking them #if they wanted to see the kid first in case they ''didn't like him'' #and my dad being my dad got furious because what the hell that's my kid no matter what #and the sad reality was that a lot of adoptive parents would like to look at the kid first to see if they liked them as if they were what #a fucking couch #anyways. everyday i'm more thankful for how open my mom is about this whole thing and how it was #she still has the name and all the info of my brother's biological mother in case he wants to contact her again #(which hasn't happened since he had his very big and bad bipolar crisis) #but yeah idk i admire my mom a lot she's always trying to do what's best for everyone even if sometimes it comes out a little harsh #b.txt

[volfoss]

autism incident CRITICAL at 3 pm btw

#twist rambles #NOT ALL OF THIS IS FROM TODAY but ive been working hard on this silly guide... its been a lot of fun compiling info that either doesnt exis #on the net anymore (but was archived) or wasnt in english and putting it all together :) idk its silly no one cares abt this game rly but i #has been a VERY enjoyable process :) idk if ill get in depth with it enough that id put it on gamefaq or anything but also like. there is #such a lack of info out there for the game in terms of stuff in one place + easily accessible that most people dont know how many endings #there are or like. how to acheive them. still working on translating and getting that in my doc but its so so so fun <- normally needs #guides with games so ive been THOROUGHLY enjoying this part of making it like getting 2 see the other side of it idk. bringing this game #from 2001 when no ones cared abt it in years BACK!!

[savage-rhi]

I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.

#today i fucked up by reactivating my fb account which i haven't done in 2 yrs just to check on some folks id been sending good thought to #place is depressing everyone is miserable and everything feels fake and my mind is like #LOL this is why we left bitch byeeee #so i deactivated again went to work and idc what anyone says there are folks like me that can and do feel the energy and emotions coming of #people and it can fucking suck especially when so many are disregulated so i got a sensory overload and boss was nice enough to let me take #a bunch of breaks today and even scream in her office cause She Gets It (TM) #the weather is rainy and cold i'm getting so many fibro flares idk how i'm moving anymore #ive missed so many days of work already and it's not even fully winter yet i still have my job and im thankful i have an understanding team #but that doesnt pay the bills im still trying to find a way to pay for that doctor appointment coming up #graduate courses began for college and i think i'm gonna be okay but damn did they throw too much info all at once at me and that made #my adhd brain go WELL SHIT #ive been feeling incredibly lonely and not wanted in so many spaces that im struggling to even communicate with the few that i know do #love me for me and nothing else im trying so so so hard to keep being there for people and to keep loving #people that need it cause i don't ever want another human being to ever feel as miserable and unwanted as i have felt #but im also tired because i feel like thats all anyone ever sees me as just this being that can take their woes away and make them feel #amazing and i love that i can do that and listen to so many traumatic stories and help folks process that trauma my boss and many throughou #life have told me i have a gift for healing people and a vibe to me thats different than most and it feels good being around me but today i #just felt like people keep taking and taking and taking and i dont expect anything back thats not who i am id rather give than receive #but damn it i just wish someone could just give me the biggest hug in the world dont even have to say a thing just hold me and be present #and hold space for me to just feel weightless id cherish that more than anything in the world right now #on a positive note... #my dinosaur vo stuff got traction im getting a new cosplay put together i havent done that in 4 years i got to pet a wild deer i made #a coworker laugh so hard his juice went out his nose and my boss peed a little #im slowly taming another wild flock of turkeys and i got a bag of my favorite takis the guacamole flavor #i got a lot to be thankful for and i acknowledge it #but damn it im tired #thank you for coming to my Ted Talk rant and rave #if you made it this far: you're an incredible human being and i love you #please go treat yo self to something nice and know i love you for you

[quaranmine]

You put so much research and detail into Incandescence of a Dying Light and it's amazing. Do you have any tips for someone trying to research for a story? One of my characters is an elderly Floridian lifeguard but the best sources I can find are some NYT articles about Long Island lifeguards

Oh thank you! I appreciate that.

As for researching, I think the best way to go about it is to try to research specific parts of your problem. You might not be able to find resources for an elderly Floridian lifeguard, but you can probably find resources for lifeguards, lifeguards in a particular area, and elderly people doing swimming/rescues. I can try to give you some pointers but without knowing your story or specific needs some of these tips might not work. Just use them as a jumping off point! Specific problems can be easier to research than broad problems--unless it's too specific, and then you lose all your results. Researching is a balancing act between those two.

Are they a lifeguard at the ocean, or a pool? If it's the ocean, where in Florida? I'd look up information about the sea currents in that area. That might give you an idea of the kind of risks your lifeguard is looking at, like if they work at a beach in a place known for rip currents or something. That will add some realism and you can probably find resources on what your lifeguard character is looking for. If it's a pool, your job is probably much easier because I have to assume most of the same rules apply for elsewhere.

Is there a specific time period you are looking at? I'm no lifeguard, so anyone can correct me if I'm wrong, but I imagine the profession hasn't changed very much in the past few decades or longer. If someone is a lifeguard in the 80s my gut feeling is that their job is still pretty similar to what it is today. So, that might make your research easier if you can expand the time periods you are looking at. My story is set in 1989 so I'm always looking for info from that time period. But most of what I'm doing is looking at fire lookout resources from the 50s or early 2000s, and then matching the technology in my fic to the late 80s.

I would also look up things like lifeguard handbook, lifeguard skills, lifeguard employee handbook, lifeguard training materials, etc. For example, just by looking up "florida lifeguard" I found the Jacksonville Beach Ocean Rescue Lifeguard Academy, which gives some details about the requirements and steps to become a lifeguard there. Could be useful information. I also found a 400 page Red Cross lifeguarding manual pdf. For more personal information, perhaps add stuff like "interview" to the search? I'm sure you would be able to find people talking about their jobs.

As for your character's age, that might not require much research. Being older does not mean a character can't be fit or strong (but I don't know if you mean 60 or 90 when you say "elderly" and that matters.) You could explore sources about active elderly people too, if you wanted. This will just depend on the details of your character though.

I would also recommend using some advanced search techniques. For example, if you only want examples about Florida, write it as "florida" with the quotes around it, and you'll only receive pages that contain the word Florida. Or, if you want to exclude something that is muddying your search results, put the word with a minus. Tragically at one point during my chapter 8 research i had to add -maui to the search to try and exclude news articles associated with it.

Generally though I would just look for lots of sources of many types, and then add them together. It is unlikely you will find sources that match everything you need. Break down what you need to know into smaller pieces. I may have 20+ tabs open for information that amounts to....a few paragraphs. Vary your search queries a lot, try different key words. My research for Firewatch AU has been helped by the fact that the job involves the federal government, which is great at recordkeeping and often has a lot of publicly available information. Your mileage may vary with other subjects. Watch your sources for accuracy. Or, if you rely on sources from a different location (Long Island vs Florida) be prepared to try and identify and fill in the gaps where there are differences between the locations.

Good luck!

#quara asks #idk if i've explained the process very well but this is a lot of how i break down stuff #i just spend ages poking around #it helps that i really do enjoy the process #i like searching and breaking down information to try and find what i need and it's so fun when you finally get good relevant info #anyway i have 29 tabs open to firewatch au research right now on my computer #about 9 of them are relevant to next chapter. several of the others will be relevant to chapter after next and some are leftover from 8 #and some i just keep open all the time anyway (climate data or calendar of 1989 or the game's map)

[opens-up-4-nobody]

I can't tell how terrible my ability to pay attention is. Like it's hard for me to read because every few minutes my brain will get derailed by the ambient and often cyclical thoughts in my head. It's extremely annoying, sort of like trying to read when someone is talking direcly into my brain. The same things happens when I'm trying to listen to things, I don't even notice I've zoned out until I come back and have to rewind. But then I just zone out again. It also makes me nervous driving bc worry abt getting distracted by my thoughts. If I'm driving anywhere, I have to sing the whole time to make sure I'm paying attention.

#just imagine me singing a sobbing like a lunatic as i try to manuver a city street #the reading thing is weird tho. bc i only just kind of realized my thoughts and not just my dyslexia r part of the problem #like maybe its a dyslexic think but idk. its not even that im very distractable generally #like i will just sit in one spot for 7hrs to get something done. im very focused. but i cant seem to pay attention to information delivery #its so annoying tho bc my thoughts go round and round in circles and its real boring and i try to pay attention to other things like while #i run. but then my brain just talks over it the whole time. its like im getting 2 wavelengths at once and then my brain gets too loud and #pulls me away from the other info. maybe its part of a processing issue? like the audio stuff at least? #bc my brain takes way too long to understand what ppl r saying to me. but thats absolutely a dyslexia thing #idk its the reading thing thst stumps me. idk how normal thst is? i wish it would stop. i would like to read words #unrelated

[weenhands]

#DOMT look at this im still documenting my process on being on the fence about possibly getting diagnosed for autism Dont look #just. realizing things #like. i know its fixations on celebrities but sometimes its people i know in person its not that i need to be with them 24/7 i just #i Have to collect information about a particular person at times #Actually. Now that we are on topic of this i remember having that feeling towards smaller internet celebrities on instagram and #smaller youtuberz #and actually going to very great lengths to research as much information on them as possible #plus mimicking their behavior alot. Hm ash i wonder why #DONT LOOOOK #look i used to be like Yea i dont really collect information about things im interested in 👍 #and sometimes its awkward when im in a space where autistic ppl r everywhere and tend to show that #they themselves collect lots of information on their interests (yes the mcr fandom) #but. i literally do have a history of this. two times it being internet celebrities/youtubers and once it being on haircare itself. #i remember telling myself i could probably do anyones hair. Anyone. because i know so much about it and the complexities #rn my special interest is makeup of course. but im studying how it can turn into info collecting + on people itself . #idk ldjsjdhdhdhduwodjsofiowdid i know i am hashtag confirmed autistic a year ago but i need a much more deeper understanding of myself ig

[dragontamer05]

One of my favourite things in Forest of Piano is that like the main character/ one of the mains at one point he's working at a club playing Piano, but does it drag. just because.

I don't recall ever getting any explanation as to what got him into doing it - besides just picking up a side job for money I guess (and you know he loves playing Piano regardless )

But it's not played off as a joke- at least not at his expense / no bad 'haha guy dressed as girl jokes'

Like closest thing I can think of comedy coming out of it is just the other main character/his friend finding out when going to visit him and getting a bit flustered and part of that comes from Kai himself clearly having a bit of fun before revealing the truth nor is it a fact ever lingered on

The other comes about more in the form of this other guy who's clearly quite attracted to Kai's lady persona Maria and basically goes about trying to track her down (only later hit with the revelation that Kai is Maria- which again is at that guys expense never directed at Kai)

but beyond that it's just never focused on, we learn that it happens to be a job he does and then we just move because it doesn't matter to the rest of the story

and as far as can be seen and shown it's not like it's a drag club/bar either any other ladies we see working there are just that , clearly not meant to be Drag

#piano no mori #kai ichinose #like yeah it's funny but as I said what's funny comes from the outside and mostly other peoples reaction- #the unexpectedness of Shu coming to meet an old friend not expecting him in drag #and the hilarity of said guy who's been fauning over a girl discovering the lady he's infatuated with was a just a dude in drag #(also as far as I recall even up on learning this in no way is he actually mad or somehow think less of Kai- it's mostly funny as this guy #clearly has no idea how to process this info and just being really awkward around him- with Kai not knowing why this guy is acting so weird #idk how to describe it really only that what jokes and humour that are made are not done in away at Kai's expense / making fun of what he's #he's doing since additionally Kai don't give a fuck #with no jokes of him getting all awkward and embarrassed

[be-good-to-bugs]

for once i was gonna go to bed at 9pm like im supposed to but my laundry isnt done till 10pm hell on this miserable world

#the bin #its not done because i waited till 8pm to do it uhh #it only takes 35 minutes to wash but i somehow lost 25 minutes because it was exactly 8pm when i went out to wash it #and it was exactly 9pm when i started the dryer #and drying takes an hour. sad. oh well. qt least ill have clean clothes #i cant stop thinking about coffee also. it actually highley sucks its really annoying my brain keeps replaying the numbers and process #of making stuff. STOP. im not working im not being paid im not getting laid to think abt making lattes so fuck off #well im getting it down at least. my brain will probably stop in 1 week or 2 but it does this with lots of things. makes it hard to play #sudoku or pocross or even solitaire because my brain starts thinking about it all the rest of the time to get my to understand it #by just replaying the same scenarios and info over and over. i blame repetition being the only method of learning i ever had as a child #its useful yes but its also not effective if its the only thing you use. my thinking is very slow and my knowledge of stuff sucks #cause it was mainly memorizing disconnected stuff. well. i shoulr work on that i guess. idk how exactly but ill figure it out one day #i have no idea what ill be doing tomorrow but im kinda hoping ill start with videos tbh. i dont really wanna make coffee tomorrow

[feistyvampire]

i never thought to talk about this but the way i have the vampires function in my OC verse is that blood keeps their body functioning in a sense so they can sort of appear human if no one looks too closely at them or their habits but it makes them even more dependent on blood not only as a way to sate their hunger but to also keep living a relatively normal life

and the blood keeping their body functioning allows them to consume regular food or drink and etc if they choose to, though those things still don’t give them as much nourishment as blood does and are generally just for personal pleasure, for appearances in public, and/or nostalgia

edgar himself isn’t always able to keep food and drink down unfortunately so hes learned to be more careful to an extent but some days he probably feels like he misses being human

#ooc; #edgar definitely drinks to cope tho lmao i think its something i’d like to see him work on but hes kinda in the process #and has been somewhat leaning on friends for support instead #blood / #alcohol / #muse info; #world building; #idk which tag it would be best in so both it is i guess #does this make sense? who knows #but its how i chose to spin it lol

[snallavanta]

parents told me i might have adhd 🤩 guess that explains the hyperfixation problem <3

#honestly idk what that means for my life in general but cool i guess??? #LMAO this is such odd information to be given idk how to process it #also idk if hyperfixation is actually a problem for adhd. i know unhyperfixation (? the opposite lol) is common for adhd #but yeah idk what to do with this info so the people of tumblr can have it <3