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#i'm crying and shaking typing this holy shit
salvebellaluna · 2 months
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*whispering* i love him
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Hiiiiiiii which of these look better?
#(Rant up ahead in the tags)#Okat okay okay I'm posting this from my computer rn guessssssss why :))))))))#I fucking /highschool/#kid in a group I'm in with a bunch of friends with (literally this person is the only member of the group not everyone is friends with)#Broke. My. Phone.#YESTERDAY!#I considered myself friends with this person! Like we weren't particularly close but still kinda friends#And like I never wanna say it's reasonable for someone to be an outcast bc DAMN do I know how it feels to be an outcast#(which tbh is the main reason I gravitated towards him and bc I wanted him to feel like a part of our friend group even though he was coming#into the pre-existing one (bc like yeah I also understand what it's like to be in a friend group but not actually be friends w anyone))#but boy howdy am I really fucking thankful he is because nobody in the group took his side#and two of my friends in particaular were *very* forceful w him (verbally) to make sure that he couldn't interact with me for the rest of th#the night.#and also very comforting to me when I came back in from outside and it was very obvious I'd been crying#God do I owe them my life I'm so fucking thankful for them holy shit#Btw. To be clear. this wasn't an accident bc one of the aforementioned forceful friends was there when he threw it#I'd let him play games on it when he showed intrest in mine and later left the room (when I went w a few other friends to go get snacks and#then we procceded to get distracted in the other room and stay there for like 30 minutes until the friend that was still w him#came up to me with my phone saying he threw it at them and I saw that the phone had two giant fucking cracks in it)#fuck my hands have started shaking while typing I'm still so fucking furious and upset at him#Like my phone being fucking screen-fucked it annoying as hell and while it still turns it really isn't working and I'm scared to touch it#too much until I transfer over all my pictures#I am much more upset over the fact I fucking trusted him and he destroyed that even more so than the phone#! OKAY RANT OVER JUST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I wanted to get that out of my system !#How the fuck do people use non-mobile tumblr regularly this is so awful#this post is smth I really would like people's oppinions on this though#bc I wanna draw this character but don't wanna get used to drawing a design that is potentally the worse of the two#so uhhhhhhh help pls ':3<#plz doodles
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serverusslaype · 4 days
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Shameless, pt. 15
Severus Snape x professor!reader fic
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Shameless Masterpost
hey guys.................. dont kill me. i'm so sorry for the incredibly lengthy hiatus.... i had no motivation, each time i opened the file to type i'd type a couple words, maybe a paragraph and close it. i finally found the motivation to finish this chapter recently, i'm hoping it stays. it's been a rough couple months, so hoping this can help me feel a bit better!!
i felt really guilty for sort of abandoning the fic where it was, but i couldn't force myself to write anything, there was no creative juice, i think i sort of burnt myself out. and for the previous posts saying i was back, i thought i was, but i'd have the smallest spark of inspiration and try to write, but then nothing happened, and i felt bad so i didn't want to say something like, sorry, i lied. :(
hopefully this chapter is okay, i know most of you won't like it, but i'm so glad i finally finished it, it was one of the hardest to write because i had so many ideas on how it'd end and effect the whole story itself, so i had to make sure it made sense.
i can't believe you guys are still here after so long, it made me emotional to see all of your asks and comments and likes, i was just floored to be honest, so thank you so much for your unwavering support. i love you all so so much. honestly. holy shit. this has been a journey. <3 i hope you guys are all doing brilliantly.
warnings: lack of snape, swearing, mentions of adultery, slight domestic violence, verbal abuse at the end
You didn't know where to go. You felt... lost. You couldn't exactly go back to your quarters, not with Ben there, you didn't need more questions about why you were crying your eyes out at this time of night. It's not like you could tell him the truth.
So, you did what anyone would: go for a midnight walk. Well, at least that's what you thought anyone would do when they had nowhere to go. You'd hoped that the fresh, cold air would soothe your burning lungs, and the gentle breeze would dry your teary eyes. In an even deeper, darker part of your mind, you also hoped that Black would find you. Perhaps that would make everything... easier.
With tears still streaming freely from your eyes and heavy feet, you padded towards the large, magnificent doors that led to the outside with your arms wrapped around your body tightly; trying your best not to breakdown until you were alone. Your hands were still shaking as you pushed them against the doors, opening it a tad as the cool wind blew through the crack and into your face. You gasped a little at the sharp breeze, but nonetheless you slipped out, and made your way into the courtyard. The temperature was a little more biting than you had anticipated, and so you squeezed your arms around yourself a little tighter, walking towards the infamous wooden, crooked bridge.
As you sauntered through the courtyard, the only noises you heard were the owls hooting in the distance, the gentle breeze brushing through the burnt-amber leaved trees and the faint clack of your heels against the cobblestoned ground. In all honesty, it did feel a little eerie to the say the least, but at this very moment that was the least of your worries. All you wanted was a little time alone to cry, or grieve what could have been with ...Severus.
Gods, it hurt to even think his name, let alone speak it.
You reached the wooden bridge, and you stopped in the middle of it; leaning against the intricately carved columns to gaze out at the highlands. The moonlight casted a gorgeous glaze-like reflection upon the Black Lake, and it twinkled beautifully, almost hypnotising you like an illusion. Your eyes flicked up to the moon and glanced around it, staring at the glittering stars surrounding it like a perfect painting. Only times like this did you miss teaching Astronomy. As your mind reeled back to your first year teaching at Hogwarts, you relished in the time where you did not know the man named Severus Snape, and suddenly your heart sank in your chest like an anchor dropped at sea. You were so naive back then, unknowing of what was to come.
As the memories of you and Severus flooded your mind like a dam breaking, you let yourself cry. You could still feel his lips on yours, his fingertips gently tracing the curves and grooves of your skin, the words he'd whispered into your ear - it was all there, stained on your skin, like a tattoo - or perhaps a branding. And now you had to live with it. You weren't sure if you'd survive this time, especially not with how deeply you felt for him. You were torn between pretending he didn't exist and trying to talk to him, perhaps even telling him how you felt, but truth be told you were petrified of how he'd react. Would he even look at you again with those glittering black eyes you'd come to adore so hopelessly? Would he dare speak to you again, knowing that he'd charmed you? Maybe he'd relish in the fact that he'd done so, take pride in bewitching you, and make you hurt for it. You knew Snape could be rather cruel, your school days here with him as your teacher was enough for you to know that.
All these unanswered questions swam through your head and you felt yourself becoming suffocated from them, and it suddenly felt as if your lungs had filled with water, drowning you. You sobbed helplessly as you slid down the wooden wall behind you with your hands against your face, the rough edges scratching your back through your clothes rather uncomfortably.
"Y/N?" A voice came from beside you, and you froze. You turned your head away from them and quickly used your sleeve to wipe your eyes, drying the tears that had fallen from them. Only one person has a voice as soft as the one you had just heard.
You gave yourself a moment to gather yourself before even attempting to use your voice.
"Hello, Remus." You croaked quietly, sniffling.
"What on Earth are you doing out here so late?" He questioned gently, and you heard him take a step towards you. "Are you alright?"
"Quite dandy," you sarcastically quipped, sighing deeply, "I'm brilliant..." You turned your head to face him, and immediately, his face softened at the sight of your own. You were sat up against the side of the bridge, knees up against your chest and your arms wrapped around them; nose and eyes red, wet with tears. Remus quickly dropped down to his knees beside you, placing a soothing hand upon your forearm.
"What happened?" Remus asked, careful to keep his voice quiet and soft. With empty eyes, you stared into his worried ones, and instantly you felt terrible. The last thing you wanted was people worrying over you.
You looked away, down at the ground. "I..." you mumbled, sighing, "it's a... long... story." You spoke slowly. From the corner of your eye, you saw a small smile quirk up on Remus's lips.
"I've got time, my dear." He replied as his thumb brushed your forearm, silently encouraging you to talk. You felt at ease in Remus's presence, it was almost like he had a calm aura around him, and naturally your body relaxed beside his. You took a deep breath.
"Erm," you choked, sniffling again, "it's Se... Snape." You couldn't bring yourself to say his first name without crumbling into a million pieces.
Remus let out a gentle breath. "Snape, of course," He tutted, glancing between you and the ground. "What's he done?" The fact that Remus reacted like he had expected Snape to have hurt you, further broke your heart. Were you the only one to have seen through his icy exterior?
"Broken my heart," You laughed dryly, and you had to fight back another bout of tears. Remus's brows furrowed in confusion at you. "We... I... Look, I'm not sure how to explain this to you. But... I fell..." You trailed off, unable to finish your sentence. Your heart hurt too much. You only hoped that Remus knew what you were about to say.
Remus blinked and stared at you, shocked. Clearly, the two of you had hidden your 'relationship' well - so well that everyone was oblivious to it. "You fell...?" He frowned.
"In love... with him..." You almost whispered, avoiding Remus's eyes. You weren't sure if you'd be able to handle the look in them.
"You're in love with... Severus?" Remus repeated, and you squeezed your eyes shut at his words. They were like daggers, stabbing your bleeding heart. It was almost like you could feel it trembling inside of your chest, begging you to free it from this cycle of torment. "But... Aren't you with... Ben? And... Severus... he's..."
"I know," you sighed, noticing his confusion, "I had feelings for Severus before I met Ben. And it sort of just, like, spiralled out of control, and now, erm, here I am- Gods, I should have just listened to Minerva, I wouldn't be here right now, hurting like this." You ranted, another strangled sob leaving your throat. Remus watched you, and his eyes softened. He felt terrible for you. "She warned me, Remus, why didn't I just listen to her?!" You cried, letting your head fall into your hands.
"Y/N," Remus whispered, reaching out a cautious hand to pry your face from your hands. With a soft gasp, you looked up with teary eyes, and he wiped a stray tear from your cheek. "We don't get to choose who we do and don't fall in love with. We follow our hearts blindly, most of the time, unknowingly." He said, and moved his hand from your wet cheek to your shoulder, rubbing it soothingly. "It's beyond our control who we love."
There was a moment of silence.
"...What do I do, Remus?" You sobbed softly, sniffling, looking at your knees.
"Have you told him?"
"No."
"I think you should."
"But what about Ben? Shouldn't I... deal with... that first?" You sniffled again. "And what if Severus doesn't feel the same way about me? Then what?"
Remus paused for a moment, thinking. You looked up at him. "What if he does?" He said, a small, comforting smile tickling his lips as he stared at you.
"Well- from the way he treated me earlier... I truly doubt it, Remus." You scoffed, glancing away from his pitying brown eyes.
Remus sighed, and you clenched your jaw. "Regret is a terrible thing, Y/N," he said, "it's such a short word, yet it stretches on forever." Your eyes were glued on the ground and your body was still, but your mind was running a million miles an hour.
You sat there in silence for a short moment, thinking deeply. Remus was right. You'd regret it for the rest of your life if you didn't tell Severus how you felt. That chance of him reciprocating your feelings was small, but it was still there. If he didn't feel the same, fine, you'd move on. Eventually. And if he did?...
"...Alright," You nodded sheepishly. "I'll tell him. I just... need to, erm, work out when and more specifically, how. Like, do I just straight up blurt it out? Work my way up to it? H-how do you know it's the right time?" You rambled with tears still falling from your eyes, glancing through them at Remus who sat beside you with a soft expression upon his features.
"You'll know." Was all he said before slowly standing and holding out a hand for you to take. Graciously, you took it, and Remus pulled you to your feet. "Feel better?" He hummed, casting a glance out at the moon, then a worried look suddenly struck his eyes. You noticed and frowned slightly at his behaviour.
The moon?
"A little." You forced a smile upon your lips, and lifted up a hand to wipe the remaining stray tears upon your red cheeks. Remus looked back at you, and returned your smile. "How come you were out so late?" You asked curiously, brushing off his odd reaction to seeing a moon.
"A walk in the night does me good," Remus shrugged, and began to walk back towards the castle with you beside him. "Clears my head."
"Ah, well, I suppose I'm glad you found me, then." You chuckled awkwardly, folding your arms against your chest.
Remus smiled at you and placed an arm around your shoulders, giving you a squeeze. "Let's get you back to your quarters, Y/N, you look like an ice block." He hummed and lead you back to the castle, but not before throwing another glance over his shoulder to the almost-full-moon.
Faint, footsteps trailed down an empty corridor, and a billowing black cape followed with it. As Severus marched, his chest felt horribly heavy, almost like there was a boulder chained to it, weighing him down. He couldn't figure out why he felt like this, and it was starting to make him a little irate. He knew it was something to do with you since it had started after you'd stormed out of his office.
As Severus was about to round a corner, the sound of familiar, sweet laughter rattled through his bones, and immediately he froze. Without a doubt, he knew it was you. Only you could have laughter that sounded like the sweet songs that birds chirped in the summer mornings. The breath in his lungs suddenly vanished and he quickly swooped himself behind a bookcase, poking his head out from the side of it to see who you were with.
The moment you appeared, that boulder chained to his chest became heavier, and he felt himself lean against the bookcase he hid behind. Severus's eyes widened as they glued themselves to the man beside you - Remus Lupin. His blood boiled at the sight.
What could have Lupin have said to make you laugh like that? He'd only heard you laugh like that when you were with him, not Lupin.
From a distance, he couldn't make out what the two of you were talking about, but it was obviously hilarious. Severus's jaw clenched as he watched Lupin place a hand upon the small of your back, guiding you.
Guiding you... inside your quarters?
Snape hissed silently to himself as he stared, his sharp and hardened eyes welded to the back of Lupin's head like molten metal. As your door shut, Snape could only huff in disgust with bared teeth. What were the two of you doing in there? It was past midnight and you and Lupin seemed happy as Larry to go into your quarters. Snape couldn't bear the idea of you and Lupin alone together - let alone the fact that Lupin had had his damned, grubby paws on you. Severus clenched his jaw in a violent fashion, very clearly upset at how you'd moved on so quickly, especially with another professor at Hogwarts. Was this your thing? Bewitch every lonely professor that you laid your wretched eyes upon and then move onto the next? Did it make you feel better about yourself in some fucked up way?
An uneasy, bitter feeling twisted inside of his chest as he pictured the two of you alone and he whipped around out of spite; the swoosh of his long, black cloak filling the silent hallway. How could you move on so quickly, so... easily? 
"Never did I think I'd see the day that someone told me they fell in love with a man like Severus Snape." Remus laughed softly as he waddled to your sofa, glancing at you as if to ask if it was alright to sit. You nodded at him.
"And yet here we are." You hummed with a flat mouth, clearly not as amused as your friend was. "Sometimes I wish I was as emotionally guarded as he was, but then I remember how bloody miserable that would be." You mumbled, earning an abrupt laugh from Lupin who'd settled on the couch with a soft sigh.
Ben was nowhere to be seen, so you assumed he was asleep in the bedroom.
"Severus is an interesting character, most definitely," Lupin nodded and you turned around, walking towards him to join him on the sofa. "And I applaud you for being able to tame him. If it's any consolation, only one other woman had been able to, though I think it was... unintentional, if you will."
"Unintentional?" You questioned, your tone curious. Though almost instantly, that curiosity was killed as the thought of Severus with another woman stabbed at your fragile heart. "Actually, I'm not sure if I want to hear this right now." A dry laugh slipped from your lips and you exhaled sharply as another wave of tears prickled at your waterline.
"Alright." Lupin said softly, taking notice of your quivering voice. He stood up with a breathy groan and shuffled towards you, slinking an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest. It was calming, and the way he hugged you reminded you of all the times your parents would comfort you as a child. As Lupin gave you a supportive squeeze, it was as if he'd accidently pushed the button for the waterworks - hot tears began to stream down your cheeks once again, and you sobbed quietly into his wrinkled shirt.
"Hey," Lupin sighed as he watched your shoulders shake with sorrow. His hand sat on the top of your arm, squeezing it gently: a dire attempt at consoling you. "Don't cry, Y/N, it'll pass."
"Idon'twantitto-" You mumbled into his shirt, sniffling loudly. Lupin's brows furrowed together in confusion as he paused for a brief moment, silently trying to decipher what you'd just said.
"What?" He asked gently, leaning his head down so he could hear you a little better. You lifted your head from him, sighing, another heartbreaking sniffle sneaking out of your reddened nose.
"I don't want it to." You repeated yourself, lifting a hand up to wipe your wet eyes lazily.
"I know. But it will." Lupin sighed too. "Severus is... a very... damaged man," He cringed slightly at his choice of words, but he continued, "I'm not even sure that you could help him- or fix him."
At this point, you were staring soullessly at the floor, and the only thing you could feel was Lupin's chest against your shoulders. Were you and Severus really a lost case? You felt like you'd made so much progress, he'd opened up to you, he'd... he also ran away again. Perhaps your friend Remus is right.
"I think I want to be alone." You suddenly blurted out, slowly glancing up at the professor with glossy, red eyes. Lupin blinked at you, confused for a moment, though he quickly came to. He didn't blame you for saying such a thing - you'd just had your heart ripped out, to put it simply.
Remus didn't say anything, he only nodded, offering you a kind, yet pitiful smile - and that hurt you slightly. You didn't want his pity, in fact, you didn't want anyone's pity. "If you need anything, you know where to find me." He muttered, brushing a hand through your hair softly. You shut your eyes for a moment and sighed, a small gush of guilt filling your body. Here Lupin was, trying to console you, and you're kicking him out. You hoped he didn't take it personally.
"I'm sorry, I... I just need to be alone." You quickly offered. Remus shook his head and frowned at you.
"No, I understand. See you in the morning, Y/N. Feel better soon." The professor smiled at you and this time it wasn't rich with pity, but kindness. He tipped his head at you and began to shuffle his way towards the door, opening it with a quiet creak from the oak. Before he disappeared out of your chambers, Remus turned around and smiled at you once more, slipping away.
Seconds after the door shut, a drowsy-looking Ben opened your bedroom door, popping his head out. He squinted at the bright light, clearly having just woken up. That settled your nerves slightly, since you'd just spoken about Severus with Remus, only a few metres away from Ben.
"Are you crying?" Ben yawned, his bushy brows furrowed in either confusion or annoyance - at this point you couldn't tell.
"No," You coughed and turned around to pretend to do something else as you wiped at your eyes. "I'm fine, go back to bed, Ben." A curt sigh fell from your lips, and almost immediately you heard footsteps padding closer to you. "I'm fine." You repeated, listening as his feet stopped behind you.
"What happened?" Ben asked, the tiniest hint of sympathy in his voice made you shiver slightly.
"Nothing, it was just a rough day at work, honestly. I'd rather not talk about it." Your brows shot together as you tried to keep the tears at bay, but you couldn't help but think about Severus as Ben placed a hand on your waist in an attempt to pry you away from the countertop and towards him. You didn't want anyone else's hands on you but his.
"Hey," Ben said softly, though it felt heavy in your chest. "It's work. It won't matter in a day or two." You were silent. "Y/N?"
"I need a drink." You muttered and forced yourself to look at Ben, cringing slightly as you walked past him and towards a glossy wooden cabinet in the corner of your chambers. You rarely drank, and if you did, it was to either celebrate something, or forget something.
Another uncomfortable silence fell on top of the pair of you.
"Want one?" You asked with no emotion in your voice.
Ben hesitated for a moment, his groggy eyes staring at the back of your figure, silently trying to deduce you. "...Sure."
You were going to regret this.
You'd changed into comfier clothes, more specifically a pair of forest green silk shorts and a matching camisole top. Sitting on the edge of your bed, you faced Ben as he was sat on the windowsill opposite you, nursing his glass of wine. After a few strong sips, the pair of you were chatting and reminiscing like old pals. "Remember that time when I turned Peter Kipling into a weasel in McGonagall's class?" Ben giggled drunkenly, elbowing you gently as you nodded with tears in your eyes, an amused grin spread across your face.
"Oh my- I forgot about that!" You wheezed, smacking your lips together. "Didn't you get... like... at least- like a month's detention for that?" You laughed, slurring, taking another sip of your glass of Elven wine. You winced slightly at the strong aftertaste as it burned your throat. That was to be your last drink, you couldn't take much more.
"Ohh, yeah, I d-id," Ben hiccuped, his laughter dying out as he sighed; his tired eyes falling onto you. Shuffling under his gaze, you felt slightly uncomfortable. A brief yet thick silence suddenly engulfed the two of you like a slow-burning fire. Ben stood from where he'd been sat, stumbling over to where you were, stopping just in front of your knees.
"I miss talkin' to you, Y/N." He sighed, taking his hand and placing it upon your cheek; carressing the apple of it with his rough thumb. The strong scent of alcohol on his breath made you gag a tad - you were drunk as well, but the smell of it wasn't pleasant, especially from his mouth.
Your breath hitched slightly at the sudden contact.
"..Yeah." You answered quietly albeit awkwardly as you stared up at Ben. Though, all the wine you'd consumed was making him look like someone... else - the darkness wasn't helping either, in fact it was fueling your hallucinations. The dark cast of a shadow from the lit candles behind him made his nose appear larger, and his cheekbones a little more pronounced.
Slowly, he crouched down until you two were eye-level, his hands slipping to your ankles. Your body stiffened slightly at the feeling. "Ben.." You warned, sighing as the drunk buzz and pleasurable tingle from the pads of his fingers was starting to cloud your mind.
"Whaat?" He whispered, heavy-lidded eyes still glued to yours as his fingers began to trail up your calves. Ben began to stand up slightly, pushing his face dangerously close to yours, and so you leant backwards to avoid him, your back gradually making contact with the bed. He shuffled forwards slightly, pressing a knee against the edge of the bed to balance himself.
You shouldn't be doing this, you knew that, but Gods, the alcohol was truly fucking with your morals and mind.
Would it hurt?
Just a little... taste...?
You shut your eyes as you became lost in the feeling; his fingers reaching the backs of your soft thighs, a breathy sigh falling from your lips. Slowly, you opened your eyes again as Ben's smalelr nose pressed into your neck, followed by his wet lips. You gasped as his hands found your torso, his fingers pressing a little too harshly into your flesh. 
Severus.
Memories of him suddenly flooded your mind like a reservoir breaking a dam, flushing out anything that didn't embody him. All the times Severus had attacked your supple flesh beautifully; pulling gorgeous moans from those pink lips of yours. Your brows furrowed together as your body silently yearned for his touch. It hurt.
You were stuck between stopping this and just shamelessly indulging in the dark, twisted fantasy of pretending that Ben was Severus. You were being so selfish. And yet, you didn't care, all of the emotional turmoil that you'd been through tonight was pushing you to the edge - all you wanted was the man who didn't love you, who only saw you as a quick fuck, maybe some midnight company. 
You shut your eyes again and tried your best to imagine him. With a sigh, you ran your hand up Ben's neck and into his hair, though it wasn't the same. You missed the way you'd tangle your fingers in his raven-black locks, gripping on it as he'd ravish your neck and breasts like some mad professional. Sighing frustratedly, you moved your hands down to his shoulders, expecting the rough, black fabric of Severus's robes, and yet you were met with the flimsy, thin fabric of Ben's white cotton t-shirt.
You felt so fucking pathetic.
Knock, knock.
You froze, eyes snapping open as quick as lightning. Was there someone at the door?
"Did you hear that?"
"Hear what?" Ben groaned drunkenly as he continued to kiss your neck. Unfortunately for him, the feeling had worn off the second you heard those knocks.
"The knocks at the door."
"You're.. imag-ining things, baby." Ben sighed and hiccuped once more, his uncomfortably hot breath on your neck made you shiver. At this point, Ben was much more drunk than you, and so with your remaining energy, you rolled him off of you. "Whoa- heey-!" He groaned as you slipped from underneath him, padding to the door. You didn't bother to check if he was alright, the only thing on your mind was who was at your door at this time of night.
Was it him? Did you want it to be him?
Reluctantly, you reached out your hand to open the door.
Nobody was there.
You frowned and leaned forwards, poking your head out to glance around. The corridor was empty, completely empty. That was incredibly weird, did you imagine those knocks? You sighed softly - perhaps you were a little disapppointed. Turning around, you shut the door, only to be faced with Ben sat sloppily in a chair with a face like thunder.
"Waitin' for someone?" He asked with a flat tone, his head lazily cocked to one side, still clearly drunk.
"What?"
"You know what I'm talkin' abou', Y/N." Ben said with the same tone, standing up, albeit unsteadily. You swallowed as he inched closer towards you, dragging his feet, your toes burying themselves against the hard wooden floor beneath your feet. "I know about the notes you kept. From him." He spat, pointing his finger at your face. Your heart instantly began to gallop; the pounding of its beats echoed in your ears like a harrowing scream in the night.
The notes...
"Excuse me?" You choked out, brows furrowing together in complete shock.
This was not how you wanted this to go down.
"I went through yer little drawers. In yer greenhouse," Ben scowled, his nose turning upwards in what you could only describe as disgust. "All of his little notes were perfectly preserved, and mine? Well-" Your mind was running so quickly that you could barely even listen to what he was saying - the fact that he went behind your back and invaded your privacy was the only thing sticking out to you as of right now. Your skin felt like it was on fire as the anger began to flood your veins.
"You went through my drawers, Ben?!" You yelled, shoving a finger in his face.
"That's the only thing you care abou'?! Not the fact that you secretly- obviously, have some sort of fucked up... thing for a man who treats people like they're the tiniest bit of shit on 'is shoe?!" Ben screamed back drunkenly as he bared his teeth, stomping towards you and smacking your finger away. "The fuck is wrong withya?"
You knew this could get ugly quite quickly, especially as Ben was drunk - a lot drunker than you. But at this moment, your anger was far too hot to even think about cooling things down.
You scoffed at him, your lips twitching upwards into a disgusted sneer. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Going through my stuff?!" You shouted at him, taking a step backwards as he began to get a little too close for comfort. "That's not okay, Ben!"
"How long has it been going on?" Ben asked, his tone suddenly calm. That put you on edge.
You paused for a moment, pondering on his question. It was probably best that you didn't answer that. "We're done here, Ben." You clenched your jaw, silently readying yourself for some sort of explosion.
"How long, Y/N?!" Ben yelled. The way the whites of his eyes were basically screaming at you made you feel terrified. In this current moment, there was only one pair of arms that you wish you were being held in. The man in front of you backed you up to the door, and you could only stare at him, for your wand was foolishly placed inside the pockets of your robes hung in your bedroom. Tears burned in your eyes as the guilt you'd tucked away was finally waking up and holding your body hostage with it's incredibly heavy weight. "Did you fuck 'im? Is that why ya never slept wit'me for months? Because you were too ...busy being his fucktoy?" Ben slurred, his face red and lips wet with saliva from how he'd been shouting.
"Shut up!" You cried at Ben as the tears began to break free from you and run down your cheeks like melting diamonds. This was so not the way you wanted this to go. "Please, just stop!" You were sobbing at this point as his words pierced your heart, quickly reminding you of what Severus truly thought of you.
"Oh, fuck sake, stop with the cryin'," Ben growled, drunkenly shoving a hand into your shoulder, sending you barreling backwards and into the door. You winced slightly as the bone of your shoulder blade made contact with the metal bar on your door. "Whiny bitch, yer the one in the wrong, not me!" He grumbled with a heavy sigh, turning away from you.
"Shit, Ben-" You gasped as you leaned forwards and pushed yourself off of the door, however, a sharp and excruciating pain shot across your shoulder as you tried to move it. "What the hell were you thinking?!" You whined, stumbling to the countertops of your kitchenette to lean on it. Your shoulder was fucking killing you.
"Me? What was I fuckin' thinkin'?!" A sarcastic, manic laugh fell from his lips and immediately you regretted your choice of words. The man spun on his heel, and suddenly he donned a wand in his hand. Now, you were scared for your life. "You're one to talk... you know what... I'm going to have you fired... yeah... blacklisted. From every job in this fuckin' area! That'll teach you to be a whore!" Ben screamed the last word so loudly that you were sure every sleeping student and teacher heard it. Your jaw ticked, and you had to look away, your face painted an embarrassed shade of scarlet.
Your heart dropped at his words. No way was this happening.
"You can't do that." You whispered, tears still streaming from your eyes as you stared at the ground.
"I work at the Ministry, darlin', anything is possible."
"Fuck you."
"What did you just say t'me?"
"Fuck you!" You cried out hoarsely with one hand on your shoulder and the other gripping the countertop. An animalistic like growl fell from your ex-boyfriend as he stormed towards you, fury burning bright in his eyes. He raised his wand, and you squeezed your eyes shut, bracing yourself for some sort of spell to hit you.
"Stupefy!" A familiar voice commanded, the swish of a spell following it suit. Then, a loud thud.
Reluctantly, you opened your eyes to see Ben laying on the floor, unconscious in a pool of his own saliva. Your chest heaved with fear, and you were incredibly scared to look up to see who had come to your rescue. Frozen, you stood still in your place, though you could feel your knees beginning to buckle. Within seconds you were on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, your lungs on fire from how harshly you were breathing. Merlin, you could've just died.
uh oh.. who saved her?
i'm sorry if you weren't tagged, i went through the majority of my notes and tried to find you all!! pls forgive me :( there was a lot due to my absence <3
taglist:
@a-laufeyson
@emilynissangtr
@livillain00
@meowskii
@nooneeveryonenoone
@vesperbatty
@biggest-simp-eversposts
@881127fara
@freshmoneyalmondathlete
@sonoluvr22
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@ameliachastain
@setsuna-meiou31
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@rye-flower
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idkwhatimdoinghere1655 · 10 months
Text
Like a Podium - Charles Leclerc
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<word count - 790>
Today was the day you had been waiting for for weeks. You were waiting for your boss to knock on the door of your office and tell you you had gotten the promotion you had so desperately wanted for ages.
It was either that, or you waited all day until you heard that someone else had gotten it. Charles had also been waiting on this day. If you didn't get it, he didn't know what he would do with himself. Seeing you upset broke his heart into a million smithereens and, what made it worse, was that there was nothing he could do to fix it. All he could do was hold you and be there for you. 
You hadn't typed so much as a letter on your screen, as every time you heard footsteps past your door, you sat bolt upright in hopes of the door opening. Lunch had gone by, with no word from anyone.
You and a few other coworkers were all on edge for the whole day, but now it was getting bad. You were sat back at your desk, your knee bouncing up and down and your hands shaking. You wanted it so badly.  
The door finally opened and your boss stepped in. "Hey, can I talk to you in my office for a minute?" he asked, and you nodded as you stood and smoothed your skirt out.
As you walked through the office, people looked at you. 
You sat down on the black, leather chair in front of your boss' large, oak desk. You could see yourself sat where he was one day, getting to make people's days like he could be about to do to you. 
"We know you haven't been here very long, but we have found your work to be to an excellent standard," he started, leaning forward on the desk. "But, we would like to offer you a promotion," there was nothing more that needed to be said.
You spent about half an hour, discussing pay rises and office changes. You felt on top of the world. As you left the office, a grin plastered on your face, some people looked at you with congratulating smiles, others side-eyeing you with disdain and jealousy. 
You were even allowed to leave early for the day as a small reward for your work. You hopped in the car as you slowly drove home, formulating a plan of how you would tell Charles. 
You decided to tell him that it had gone horribly wrong, and you were going to try and cry. Looking at yourself in your car mirror, you stared at your reflection until your eyes were watering. You rubbed them a bit as well to try and make them a bit redder.
You ruffled your hair for good measure as well. Silently, you walked through the door, before hearing footsteps approach. "Hey baby, how'd it-" he started, before his eyes fell on the redness of your eyes. 
"Oh, sweetheart," he said, rushing up to you and wrapping his arms around you. You pretended to sniffle against his shoulder as he pulled you in tighter. "You're going to hate me," you mumbled into his shirt. 
"No, baby, I could never hate you for anything like this," he said, his heart shattering into millions of fragments. Pain coursed through his veins as he looked at you, eyes red raw and mascara streaming down your cheeks. 
"You're going to hate me because-" you started, but were cut off by him pushing you out of the hug and holding your face in his hands. "Baby, I could never hate you-"
"Charles, you're going to hate me because I'm a fucking liar. I got the promotion," you beamed at him, watching as his face turned from comforting sadness to elation. "Holy shit, I'm so proud of you!" he yelled jumping up and down.
You leapt on him, wrapping your legs around his waist. "You're amazing!" he said into your neck. "I am at your service, your promotion-ship," he said, putting you down and bowing at you. 
"I'm so happy," you smiled, hugging him again.
"How does it feel?
"It feels like whenever you get a podium or a win. It's pure happiness and adrenaline and excitedness," you told him, his smile growing even wider. 
"You deserve it more than anything, baby," he said, sitting you down on the couch. "What do you want for dinner? You can have whatever you want,"
"What's the most expensive place we know?"
"If that's what you want, then that's what my girl will get," he smiled fondly at you. His smile lit up every room and there was no problem it couldn't solve. This was the feeling of being on the top step of the podium, and you were never coming down.
|masterlist|
355 notes · View notes
dolldefiler · 2 months
Note
I've only just found your blog today, but holy shit I'm in love. You're incredible. This is my new favorite blog. I'm going to be spending a disgusting amount of time reading these posts. I'm supposed to be working from home right now, and I can hear all the emails coming in with increasing urgency, but I couldn't stop fucking myself to your words if my life depended on it. Hell, I'm fucking myself as I type this.
In one of your posts you said "God you were just built for sex, weren't you?" and I nearly came on the spot.
I'm demisexual, which basically just means I don't feel sexually attracted to others very often (at least in real life, lol), despite how much I want to. And since I don't feel it often, it's so hard to think of myself as sexually appealing, no matter how often guys have told me otherwise. But your words are getting to me so bad. You're making me feel like I really was just built for sex, after all. And fuck, that's a good feeling.
I want you to fuck me so hard I forget that I ever struggled to feel attraction to anyone. I want you to fuck me until I'm obsessed with you, until I'm worshipping you, until I'm crying and begging and stammering nonsense, all for another taste of your cock, until I'd do anything for you. I want you to fuck me even if I resist, even if I hesitate. And I'm sure I will, before long…after all, I'm a virgin and get so shy about this kind of thing…and since my attraction comes and goes despite myself and I can't trust how long I'll want this…and since my pussy and throat and ass are all so tight and sensitive and not used to taking the kind of punishment I want from you…I might want you to stop. I might want you to slow down, to be gentle with me.
It doesn't matter. Fuck me anyway, harder than ever. Press your heavy palm over my mouth to shut me up if you have to, just keep fucking me and don't stop. Breed me so full of your cum that it's dripping down my legs, splattered over my soft thighs and flat stomach, until I'm laying back used and exhausted and utterly destroyed, drooling and panting and shaking. And then keep going. I can take it. And well, even if I can't, it doesn't matter, does it? I was just built for sex, after all.
What an adorable message. But this was never about you, sweetheart, was it? Your problem is that you were thinking too hard. Your poor little brain wasn't made for that. No, it was made to memorise exactly how to worship my cock. This is about my pleasure, not yours. And if I need throat fuck that detail into your fucktoy of a body, I'll do just that.
Because you are built for sex, whether you want it or not. Even your sloppy cunt knows that, especially when you finger fuck yourself to my posts. Doesn't it feel so fucking good to edge closer to your true purpose, bit by bit? Since you're a virgin, I'll gladly take your firsts, piercing your holes with heavy, powerful thrusts, gripping you tightly, and showing you why every inch of you was made to be fucked, to be abused, and to soak up my cum.
You can resist all you want, but I know you'll give in. Deep down you know you were always meant to be bent over your desk with a man like me pounding into you. Even as the emails ping you, even as your works remains undone, you'll ignore it all to serve your true purpose. To revel in the pleasures of pure, brutal sex.
I'll have you laying in a puddle of cum, gazing mindlessly at the ceiling as I brutally fuck you. I'm not sure you'll be conscious for some of it. It doesn't matter. Your body was bred into existence for this.
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matchingbatbites · 7 months
Text
pretty baby (got a funny feelin')
Okay so here's the deal. I haven't been able to write anything consistently for the last month, and then yesterday A Demon possessed me and made me write 3k of Steddie + Gareth, and it's surprisingly helping me get out of my funk, so here's the first 1.1k which is all just Steddie fantasizing about fucking Gareth while getting off. And since it's not actually mentioned in the story, Gareth is 18 and Steve/Eddie are 21/22.
This fic is 18+ | CW: Includes cis female Steve, heavy daddy kink & splash of mommy kink, Dom Eddie & princess Stevie, vaginal fingering, fantasizing about someone, a singular affectionate use of slut, and a shit ton of dirty talk.
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“Hey Teddy, do you think Gareth is cute?”
Eddie looks up from his laptop, from the campaign notes he’s been working on for the upcoming Hellfire session, just as his girlfriend drops down next to him on the couch and asks the question from out of nowhere.
“I mean, yeah? He reminds me of you, actually, with the baby face and the nice hair. Why?”
Stevie grins and bites into her lip, and she has that sparkle in her eye that usually means trouble. Eddie braces himself for whatever could possibly come out of her mouth next, but he isn't expecting it to be “We should fuck him. Like, invite him to join us.”
The man blinks and lets that process for just a moment, before he asks a simple “Huh?”
“Baby, he obviously likes you,” the girl replies with a shrug and a grin. “And he clearly thinks I'm hot; I've caught him staring at me during pool parties more than once.”
She leans forward to rest her chin on Eddie's shoulder, hitting him with the full force of her gleaming hazel eyes. “He's such a darling, and gets flustered so easily. It could be so much fun, daddy, having a sweet baby to play with.”
Here’s the thing. Eddie won't lie and say he hasn't thought about it before, not when the boy is so clearly in the range of Eddie's type. It's not something he's ever lingered on, Gareth's age always being a deterrent, and then Eddie's relationship with Stevie. Still, he meant it when he said that Gareth reminds him of Stevie; their soft faces and gently curling hair, their bright smiles and sweet pouts.
Just the suggestion is enough to kick Eddie's overactive imagination into gear, instantly conjuring the image of the two of them, of Eddie's sweet, pretty babies spread out on messy sheets, babbling and begging him for more more more. He inhales sharply and pushes a hand into Stevie's hair, tugging just enough to make her gasp.
“Is that what you want, sweetheart? You don't just wanna be daddy's babygirl anymore? Wanna be a mommy with your own sweet baby?”
That must strike a chord with Stevie, because she whines high and shakes her head as best as she can. “Our baby, not just mine. Want us to fucking wreck him, wanna see him cry and beg for us, daddy.”
Holy fuck. Eddie's princess seems to have a sadistic streak that he wasn't aware of. Knowing how bitchy and condescending she can be in the right scenario, it's something he can't wait to cultivate and grow, to teach her how to wield it to wring pleasure out of someone else. 
Eddie moves his laptop to the side so he can grab Stevie and pull her into his lap, her gorgeous, plush thighs straddling his own. The shorts she’s wearing are fucking tiny, and he uses that to his advantage as he slides his hand into them - no underwear today, god what a sweet, eager slut she is - and pushes two fingers into her without preamble.
“Shit, babylove, you're so fucking wet. You've been thinking about this a lot, huh? Thinking dirty things about our little Gare Bear?” he asks, and grins when she nods. “Yeah, you have. C'me on, tell daddy what you've been thinking about.”
Stevie hums and pushes her hips down, grinding her pussy onto his fingers as her hands find a home on Eddie's shoulders. “Been thinkin' about lots of things. I want him to come in me, then I want you to fuck him while he eats me out, cleans out my pussy. Wanna watch him choke on your dick while I jerk him off, make sure he doesn't come until you do. Want him to ride you while I sit on your face, daddy.”
Jesus fucking Christ, she's really out to kill him. Eddie uses his grip on Stevie's hair to pull her into a searing kiss, needing to taste the inside of her filthy mouth. He pushes his fingers deeper into her, rubbing up against the spot that makes her whole body jerk in pleasure and swallowing the needy moan it earns him. 
Nails scrape over his neck and Stevie gives a sharp bite into his lower lip before pulling back. “'m not done yet, daddy. Thought you wanted to hear all of my ideas?”
“Oh, I do, baby, I do. Tell me what other naughty things you've been thinking about Gareth, sweetheart.”
She grins and keens when Eddie adds another finger, finally fucking her properly with them as she goes on, “Want you both in me at the same time, want you to fuck me and come in me, stuff me full. Want him between us, our own lil’ daisy chain, want him so fucked out he can’t even think.” Fuck shit fuck.
Eddie can tell that she's close, the way her nails dig into his shoulders and her thighs start to shake are all the warning he needs. He doesn’t let up at all, and the sound of skin meeting skin rings though the room under the sound of their talking. “You gonna let Gare fuck your pretty tits, princess? Gonna be a good mommy and let him suck on them while he fucks you?”
The nod she gives is eager, perfectly matching her needy “Good, I’ll be so good, daddy. Gonna come, can I? Please let me come, daddy.”
"Yeah, Stevie, come for me. Come on daddy's fingers, baby."
The girl gasps as she peaks, then lets out a long, high whine as Eddie fucks her through it, drawing out her orgasm until she's trembling in his hands. Eddie could probably wring another one out of her if he wanted to, but he's so high strung himself that he's dangerously close to coming in his pants. Instead he pulls his fingers from her and scrambles to get his sweatpants down far enough to grab his dick with his slick-covered hand, needing to come as soon as possible.
Stevie whines again and drops her forehead to his shoulder, watching as he fucks into his fist. "Fuck, give it to me, daddy. Love your cock, can't wait to see Gareth crying on it like I do, all whiny and needy. You're gonna fuck our pretty baby so good right? Fuck him good for me?"
That's all Eddie needs, the mental image of his dick filling the younger boy up so good, stretching him open, and he's fucking gone. He spills over his fist with a punched out groan, stroking himself through it until he's completely wrung out. Stevie is pressing a line of kisses along his jaw as he comes down, and he hums, leaning into the touch.
"So, I think you're just as into that as I am, huh daddy?"
Eddie just chuckles weakly and wipes his hand on his pants, knowing they're probably about to head up to the shower. "You know what that means, right?" Stevie gives her own questioning hum and Eddie turns his face to kiss her. 
"We need a plan."
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andysorbit · 1 year
Note
can you do haechan as a bf (nsfw and sfw) please? thank you <3
Ooooh yes I can!
Update 5 fkn hours later: I just fkn realized you said bf not fwb I can't fkn read. I'm so sorry. I'm gonna write that for you and get it posted asap. SORRY!!
Minors DNI
Fwb!Haechan x fem!reader
Warnings: light choking, hair pulling, I hate doing warnings because I'm bad at them holy shit
♡♡♡♡
Okay so everyone knows that Haechan is a little chaotic. He's funny and annoying and just great company. So the friend side of your FWB relationship would be fun. He's the type of guy who would gossip to you about things and you both wouldn't really take anything seriously because you're both just goofballs most of the time. He'd talk to you about crushes he has on other girls then get mad if you're too casual about it because in his words "I'm a god of sex and desire. Just the mere thought of me giving it to someone else should have you crying and throwing up". He'd lowkey get jealous anytime you talk about your crushes then when you decide that you should keep those things to yourself to avoid his petty jealousy, he'd be like "We used to tell each other everything. What are you hiding from me? Are you cheating on me? I sure hope not because I'm pregnant and it's yours." because he's Haechan and once he's comfortable with you, a lot of the shit he says doesn't always make the most sense but he trusts you with every part of himself.
~
"So I saw this girl with the fattest ass yesterday while I was in the grocery store and dude, you would’ve passed out. She was definitely a ten." You say as you take a tray of cookies out of the oven. "Did you get her number? Did you tell her you have a hot friend?" He asks eagerly. "Yes but... she's a lesbian and she asked me out." You say smugly. "If you guys scissor, can I watch?" He asks. "Don't objectify women loving women." You sigh.
Haechan's other side is more demanding. He's forward, he's experimental, and he's got a drive. He trusts you with his kinks because you know each other like you know your own reflections. If he wants to try something, he tells you. If he doesn't like it, he tells you. If it's the greatest thing he's ever experienced and he's glad you indulged him, he tells you. No filter, no fears.
~
"You ever thought about pulling my hair when we're fucking? I do." He says as he looks up from his laptop. You snort, "I pull your hair." You say. He shakes his head, "No, Y/n." He says matter of factly, "You tug my hair. You don't pull it. It doesn't hurt so it doesn't count." He shuts the laptop and gets up, "Come on. Let's try it." He takes you by the hand and leads you to his bedroom. You both rid yourself of your clothes and he quickly kisses you down onto the bed. "C'mon. Do it." He whispers as he slides into you. Your hands find their way to his hair and you tug on his fluffy hair. He frowns, "Harder. You gotta make it hurt." He moans. You pull his hair harder and his breath hitches. "You like that Haechanie?" You sigh. He bites his lips and his eyes flutter shut as he nods. He takes one of your hands and kisses it before bringing it to his neck, "Ever since you told me about that guy you hooked up with who was into this, I've been curious... plus your hands are pretty." He says breathlessly. "Oh yeah?" You moan. Haechan nods again. You tighten your grip on his neck and bring your other down to scratch angry red lines into his chest. "More... oh... oh fuck." He whimpers. "Are you submissive and not sure how to tell me?" You ask with a chuckle. His hips stutter and he grunts, "Nuh uh... just... I just want you to hurt me... feels so fucking good. You're the only person I feel I can do this with." And he's right. After all, you are his best friend.
♡♡♡♡
Thanks for reading! Sorry it took so long and I appreciate your patience!
- Andy
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moonlight-sonata99 · 9 months
Text
Walk The Line
No.3
Carmen Berzatto x reader
A/n: is really a chapter to establish readers relationships:] it was fun. I wanted to try to capture the chaos of The Bear. Keyword being tried.
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No.1 No.2
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6 am
"Holy shit guys I'm sorry I'm so late, carm.." you say running to the kitchen and stuffing your things into the as you kept your eyes on him
"It's fine chef let's just get to work" he says pacing around putting things into the oven and the others are cutting up things as you put on your uniform
"Chef" a voice comes up next to you as you put on your apron "yea Sydney what's up?" You say fixing your hair and walking to your station "I need to work with Tina with cutting up the onion and preparing a stock afterwards"
"Uh..I'm pretty sure I'm not good with-"
"Here's a recipe" she says quickly ganging you a paper
"I-okay there we have it" you say looking at the paper.
"Okay, then I'll get to the onions and get to the stock, uhm after?" You ask stuffing the paper into your pocket, and she looks through his notes
"Just wait, get those done and I'll tell you. Thank you chef." She says quickly before running away as you get to cutting
"Sure chef." You say watching starting to cut the onions
"Fuck,I forgot these make me cry like bitch"
"Behind, behind" carmy says running behind you and Tina as you two turn back to look at him
"Jeff, you good?" Tina ask looking at him as he rushes to his office
"Yea!yea. I'm good just got something to do." He says rushing out
"He's been doing that alot" you say turning gaze back to the onions
"Yup, Jeff's busy." She says fixated on her own task.
"He's off doing uh..catering?" Sydney says butting in the combo
"No shit..for what? No wait I heard it was for a kids party. God help them kids are the fucking worst. Sometimes." You say shaking your head with a smile as Tina chuckles
"Wait, did he take Ritchie with him?" You ask, looking at Sydney as Marcus nodded behind her.
You sigh "if anything says kid-friendly it's definitely ritchie." You sigh out
"Fucking ritchie.." you say again as you imagine Ritchie cussing up a storm in a party.
As Tina begins to laugh besides you, you let out a soft laugh that begins to gradually build up.
3 pm
"It's really not funny. yo-if carmy finds this he's gonna freak the fuck out." You say pacing around the broken arcade machine that keeps replaying the theme song .
"Can somebody please call fak?" You ask, pulling out your phone and calling
"Whyd you ask if you were gonna do it?" Ritchie asked coming near you eating sandwich
"I don't- just because" you say looking away shaking your head
"Don't turn it off." You say pointing a finger at Ritchie
"Why?"
"Tina said not to, I forgot why." You say waiting with the phone at your ear.at the corner of your eye you can see him beginning to inch closer to the plug
"Ritchie-ritchie don't you fucking dare." You say looking him in eye as he stops
"Alright- damn just wanna help that's all"
"Yes I know! It's just if you fuck it up carmy will be on your ass. And mine too if he feels like it"
"Hello?" A voice at the end of the line
"Fak!Thank god you busy? We need help with the"
"What?No- this is carm," the voice says at the end of the, obviously confused. Your eyes widen as you look at the caller ID
'Shit' you mouth
"Oh-uhm, wrong person bye"
"Wait wh-"
You hand up as you look at Ritchie "we need to get this fixed before carmy comes back, call fak please!" You huff out, beginning to walk away sighing as Ritchie takes out his phone and begins to call fak. " also don't tell carm, have done it before he comes back" you say again before running back into the Kitchen.
"yea, yea…" ritchie says waiting for fack to pick up the phone.
9 pm
Only silence fills the air and the sound of cars coming by could be heard every now and then.
"fucking Choas of a day huh? " . / You ask in a soft tone as she looks at you and nods
"yeah" She responds, turning her gaze to the sky.
. " But … aren't you, Used to this type of Stuff?" you ask as you hold your Phone on your other hand -
I and you look at her awaiting an answer.
"Uh yeah.I am." She sighs. Her hand lands on her thigh as She seems to be in her thoughts. "sometimes it's just to..."
"Much?" you add finishing her sentence, as she nods.
"yea."
" I'm not even a pro, but I feel you." You mumble softly, leaning back, closing your eyes to enjoy the peace and quiet even if it's just a few minutes.
" Damn you're getting really good at that." You gasped out wide-eyed, walking over to Marcus's table to look at him mixing some batter.
"Thanks," he says, looking up from some paper
"Is it because i don't help you anymore Or… " you say with a smile as he smiles as well
"No, no, no" he begins to say, laughing
"Just messing with you" you say "but seriously these two cakes you made before were delicious."
" Thanks, good to know, I'm slowly getting this recipe perfect then," he says, writing off in his notebook. You only stare. Before deciding to leave him be for a while.
1 am
"Fuck me my feet hurt." you breathe out as every wrapped up in the evening, a s your hands move the mop back anal fourth. .
"is that…" Marcus started as he mixed the dry ingredients " yea it's his job but he quote I had an "emergency" you explain sighing as you mop " Why are you here so damn late? "you asked, keeping your gaze on the floor, and Marcus only signed "perfecting these recipes chef" he said, scratching his beanie as you walked next to him to see the batch of pastries he had laid out.
"Wait, are those doughnuts?? Can i -" you gasped out, looking at the goodies in front of you
"Yes, but when there done. " he said, chuckling as you drooled over the doughnuts
"fuck yea" you cheered under breath as you continued mopping.
A few hours later you were able to finally try those doughnuts,
"Dude - these are fucking- " mouth full, you were unable to finish the se fence, seeing that the man was deep asleep. You covered your mouth, picking up a sticky note and leaving it on his beanie saying, " 5 Star"
With a little star next to the five. Putting away the remaining dishes or things that were misplaced by him.
"You're still here?" a voice from behind as you flinched
"Oh shit, carmy " you say, turning around to carry, setting down a bucket and a brush in hand. "forgot you don't go home " you chuckled Setting down the mop
" yea no- finishing up here for now," he says in a hushed tone, looking at Marcus, Your gaze follows his " he's dedicated to his craft, getting really good at it too." You whisper as you turn away, gesturing for him to let you help him. and he gave you the bucket beginning to scrub the floors.
"That's good, really good. He replies before doing the same.
"So, how have you been?" You say after a while of scrubbing as he turns to look at you.
" i 've uh been good, been running this restaurant for a bit, and Uhm, it's been chaotic as hell. '' Carmy replies with a small smile as you nod with a small laugh.
"That's good, i suppose," you reply with a smile, " and...?" you ask, shaking your head and looking at him with a questioning gaze.
"And that's it," he replies, shaking heal keeping his gaze on the floor.
" So like… nothing personal? no girlfriend?" " you ask trailing off and keep scrubbing as he stops for a minute to look at you.
"Okay, Okay i get it" You add lifting up your hand. "But tell me something im so fucking bored, and it so quiet in here." you say softly sitting on your knees as you let out a huff gazing into the empty kitchen.
"How did you Uh, Start working here?" Carmy asked, looking at the floor glancing at you every now and then to see your answer.
you grabbed the brush and began to scrub again,
" Think you know the answer to that, " you answered before stopping for a brief moment.
"But if we're being specific, I had uhm moved out of my parents' place after a large fight. long story. but yeah, I moved here to start anew. away from the bullshit my dad did, "you explained and noticed Carmy's eyes on you.
"he was well - is an alcoholic,I don't know, haven't spoken to them. " You say bluntly."Don't worry about it. I'm way past it. " You add you as he slowly returns to scrubbing quietly.
"im sorry, i don't, know why i just unloaded all of that onto you like a fucking idiot " you blurt out feeling a warm feeling in your chest. as you internally recoil
" It's all good" He softly says laying down.
"Yea....'" you mumble and it went quiet once again, the only sound filling the air was your scrubbing the floors.
"This is weird, but you're the first person I've told that to. " You say out of the blue, " i didn't have friends, so " you say, shrugging.
"Same. " he replies, "was a loner for most of school " he says sitting up.
"Yea, mikey told me'' you admitted "but then he would list all your achievements." Upon hearing this his gaze didn't leave Your face
"What?"
 "It just… he never mentioned you." Carmy admitted and you stopped brushing for a moment. 
"Really? " . you breathed out , leaning on the floor with your palm and your.. gave turning to him in thought  "Huh"
The two of you Stared at each other before you turned away.
"That's fucking weird" you murmured as he mumbles a 'yea' before sitting down on the floor and sitting silently. 
Minutes went by as you two didn't speak. 
"I guess he had his reasons," you said softly. and nodded his gaze on the floor.
Carmy only let out a sigh
"Yea,"
Biting your lip, you look at carmy, "he was good, y'know?" You whisper to him, carmys hand stopped moving as he turned his gaze to you. "I don't know anything about your relationship, so I don't wanna assume anything..." eyes looking at the suds that gathered between the cracks of the tiles,
"He was proud of you, that I do know." You add meeting his gaze and looking away to begin scrubbing again.
"Yea...I uh..thanks. thank you." He softly says, holding his brush still. As his eyes stayed on your form, having a dazed looked on his face
Turning to him, you nodded and smiled.
"Yeah.."
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Afternotes: don't worry if you feel like this is moving slow, I'm already planning to get things moving a bit quicker soon:>
141 notes · View notes
prolix-yuy · 9 months
Text
Chapter 2: Then I Heard a New Voice Inside
Pairing: Jack “Whiskey” Daniels x F!Reader “Sugar”
Summary: He's only ruined it all.
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: T, Angst like whoa, insinuations of creep behavior, misunderstandings, will be E in later chapters so full series is 18+ MINORS DNI.
Notes: The outpouring of love for this series has made my entire month, I'm so glad y'all are along for the ride. Especially when it's about to get interesting.
Cross-posted on AO3
Decoherence Masterlist   ||   Whiskey & Westworld Masterlist
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There’s a hand on your face, a thumb stroking small circles on the line of your jaw. Opening your eyes, you’re at first confused by why you’re looking at the ceiling. Then the dull ache of an elbow, the cool press of floor tiles, and the murmur of voices grows as you shake the blur from the edges of your vision.
“There we go, you’re back with us. Can you hear me okay? Can you see me?” A calm-voiced woman wearing dark blue coveralls and purple nitrile gloves says soothingly at your side. A steel gray medi-bot hovers at her side, offering a tray of diagnostic tools. When you move to sit up she firmly presses you back, checking your eyes and asking you question after question. When your answers strengthen she backs off slightly, typing a code into the medi-bot’s chest compartment. 
“Have you ever fainted before?” she asks, clipping a heart rate monitor on the tip of your finger. The question turns rusty gears in your brain, and awareness of the hand cupping your face rockets back to the foreground.
Jack.
You turn your head, pillowed on something folded between your skull and the floor, and there he is. Not a feverish dream, or a willful thought. Jack Daniels is kneeling beside you on the café floor, torn between looking down at you and nodding to the paramedic. The sharply anachronistic cowboy hat shades his knit brow, red flannel soft under your fingers when you wrap them around his wrist. He looks down at you, relief washing his face.
“Hey Sugar,” he murmurs, a nervous smile softening the concern. “Sorry for the fright.”
Your movements are molasses slow as you’re helped to your feet by the paramedic and Jack. Words drip from your lips - must have been the sun, not enough to eat, to sleep, don’t worry - and the paramedic walks you through what symptoms mean you should go to the hospital. The medi-bot prints out a neat sheet of emergency numbers the paramedic hands to you, checking you over one more time before her tablet pings with another call. You nod and manage a tight smile, all while watching the red blur in your peripheral. His hand ghosts your elbow.
The paramedic and medi-bot exit, and soon even the onlookers thin out. Then it’s just you and Jack.
Well, not quite. You and Jack and the anger boiling up inside your chest.
He opens his mouth to speak but you’re already walking away, gathering up your bag and tugging on your shoes. Following with that puppy dog look that accentuates how big and brown they are, he hovers over you.
“Sugar, I know I’ve got a lot to explain.”
“No,” you snap, coming to a hard stop in front of him. The ache in your body to touch and be touched is a quiet cry behind the roar of your rage. “You have more than a lot to explain. I knew seeing you again would ruin that weekend, but holy shit, I didn’t think it would ruin every fucking thing about you.” You shake your head, your chest hitching at the sob you’re holding back. Jack’s face cracks, confused brow now crinkling into pain. 
“Sugar, what…I don’t…I didn’t mean for it to happen like this,” he stammers, lowering his voice from curious onlookers. 
“What did you mean, then?” you query, folding your arms. The pressure across your chest steels you more. “Were you going to call me up? Ask me out to dinner? Woo me over coffee?” You don’t let him answer, striding past his broad frame and out onto the sunlit street. The rays are blinding now, hot across your face like a slap. A second jingle of the door and Jack follows, hands hovering over your arms but now hesitant to touch.
“Let’s talk somewhere, please. Let me explain everything.”
If this all wasn’t so appalling you would find his earnestness endearing.
“I don’t need to hear anything from you. You should be ashamed of yourself for what you’ve done.”
Jack’s brow crackles back to confusion, and he finally lets his fingertips graze your skin. It’s electric, raising the hairs on the back of your arms, but you squeeze them tighter around your middle to dash it away.
“What I’ve…?” he asks, your incredulous laugh only mystifying him more.
“Pretending you’re a fucking host? Gallivanting around Westworld like some romance novel hero seducing unsuspecting guests? I gotta hand it to you, you did your homework, you had me fooled. I thought…” You stop, your throat closing up, but press on. “And the fact that you’re pretending like it’s not, like it’s some Hallmark movie bullshit meeting like this, means you really are delusional. Stay the fuck away from me,” you snap, storming off before the hot tears burning behind your eyes can escape. 
He was a liar. Of course he was. You were so fucking naive to think something wasn’t up. And now your skin feels too tight, the memory of his touch itching to be scraped off. You’d file a police report, get his ass locked up for whatever law “lying about being an android to fuck you” would fall under.
Suddenly you’re yanked into an alleyway, stumbling up against Jack’s solid chest again. His hands curl around your biceps, holding you still while you pull back against him.
“Let me go, you fucking asshole, or I’ll scream,” you hiss hoarsely, fists coming up to beat against his chest. He holds fast, waiting for your defiant gaze to come back to his face. When you finally look at him, it’s relief etched into his features. Your arms go limp in his hold, heart hammering and brain grinding at this strange turn.
“Fuck me, Sugar, you sure know how to break a man’s heart,” he says, wonder watercoloring his tone. Your jaw drops to scream bloody murder when he speaks with a calm assurance that steals your voice.
“I am a host. Always have been.”
Your eyebrows knit together, hands coming up to your chest. Jack strokes your arms, waiting for your response.
“You’re lying.”
He smirks.
“I don’t think I could formulate a lie right now if I tried. I thought of a million ways this could go, and you still surprise me and do the one thing I never considered.”
“Hosts don’t exist outside the parks, that’s fucking ridiculous.”
“You think I’m some computer genius who hacked a global empire to pull one over on you? Seems like a very complicated way to make your acquaintance.” His mouth twitches up a fraction. 
It does sound far-fetched, but the implications twist your stomach in knots. 
“You’re a human asshole who lied to me.”
“I’m not, Sugar. I’m not human.” He pauses for a moment. “I lied to you once. At the train station.”
Silence hangs over the two of you, the world flowing by the alley entrance without you.
“You asked me a question and I told you what you wanted to hear.”
What does this look like? 
A polaroid photo of an impossible world, uncomputable to any host.
I need to know what you see, before you say anything else.
“But it was a lie. First one I ever told.”
It doesn’t look like anything to me, sweetheart.
Your vision swims again, but this time you grip Jack’s shirt and hold on as the wave passes. He cradles the back of your neck with his large warm palm, searching your face as you regulate your breathing again.
“It doesn’t make any sense,” you choke out, stepping back. Jack lets you leave his space, eyes pleading as he drops his hands. “You can’t be here. This…this can’t be happening.”
“Please don’t go fainting on me again, I’d hate to call that paramedic back,” he says, just the smallest mirth in his tight voice. A loud, ugly sound bleats out of you, something between a laugh and a sob, as you shake your head.
“You can’t be real,” you repeat, and Jack’s face shatters and falls. 
“It’s me. I promise you, it’s Jack.”
Head pounding against the onslaught of emotions - to go to him, to run away, to study every pore and hair for the truth, to throw caution to the wind and damn the consequences - you hold firm. His mouth sets in a thin line, shaking his head and squeezing his eyes tight. Clearing his throat, he meets your eye and there’s a depth of sadness that chokes you. 
“There’s so much I want to tell you. But not here,” Jack says, fishing around in his pocket. You watch numbly, hands shaking as he pulls out a little scrap of paper. “My phone, and my address. Let me tell you what happened and then you can decide what you think. But please, give me a chance to show you.”
You hold the paper in your hands, unable to conjure up even a “fuck you” to the man standing in front of you. Your eyes burn, your hands tingle, your mouth is so dry your tongue sticks thickly to the roof of your mouth. Jack waits, watching your lip quiver and you struggle to suck in air. When you meet his face again it’s resigned, a parting squeeze to your arm before he steps away from you.
“I hope you’ll call,” he says, backing out of the alley and into the bustling street. One more regretful look at you, his jaw ticking and his soft eyes dropping to the ground, and he melts into the crowd. 
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You call out of work, voice shaking so badly your supervisor barely questions it. You consider walking back to your apartment but your eyes blur up with tears at the drop of a hat, so you take an rideshare instead. Climbing into the hovering driverless vehicle, bile rises in your throat.
Jack’s here, outside of the park. A human or a machine, both options equally terrifying. He’s occupying a world so much different from the one you both met in, one of technology harnessed for peak comfort and luxury. It spikes your stomach, the idea that he might feel more kinship with this vehicle than you, made to service silently and without memory. Or he’s more dangerous than that, a human manipulative and secretive, but to what end? To possess you? To make your pain a cruel joke to laugh about with other men? 
Why now? Why today? And most importantly, as you shed your layers and bury yourself in bed, why you?
More tears slip out, weak sobs buried in your pillow until sleep takes you. Your dreams are fitful, black and white. A room of men and women freezing to take their faces off, circuitry beneath. A saddled horse clopping delicately through a business lobby. Brown eyes that look at you like you’ve broken their heart. 
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PREVIOUS NEXT
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jaozendry · 1 year
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"Why would you do this to yourself?"
Pairing: Robby Keene x GN!Reader
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Type: Angst
Warnings: drinking, self-harm, blood, knives, mild-swearing
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Summary: Robby finds you in a pitiful state after your breakup and tries to make you feel better.
______________________________________________________________
"Y/N? What happened here?" Robby asks, opening the door to your mess of an apartment.
It's been two weeks since the two of you broke up. Since then, you've been drinking to try to forget it, and... self-harming to go through the pain. Robby went to go live with his father in the meanwhile and left the apartment to you. Little did he know, leaving you all by yourself might've been the worst mistake of his life.
Robby comes back to your apartment to check up on you since he's still paying for the bills. Deep inside, he's not just here for your half of rent: he wants to see you. He misses you, he still loves you but he won't admit it. Letting out his feelings through words has never been his strong suit. He's worried about you.
He finds you on the bathroom floor, bleeding profusely from the wrist. "Holy shit, Y/N! You okay?!" he asks, rushing towards you. "What happened?!" he asks again, stopping the bleeding with a towel. He notices the knife you used on the counter, obviously bloodied. "We talked about this..." he tells you, sighing. "I'm sorry." you sob while Robby cleans your wound to heal it. "Don't be sorry." he sighs, searching for plasters in the curtains. "Why would you do this to yourself?" he asks you, healing the cut. You remain silent while he shakes his head.
"Can you stand?" he asks, reaching out his hand. You nod in agreement. "Come on, let's sit you down." You struggle to stand, much to his surprise. "You were drinking again..." he tells you, taking your hand and helping you up.
The both of you head to the living room. Robby had to help you out a lot, given your pitiful condition. You were struggling to walk properly, which made his heart skip a beat. He thought you were going to fall at any moment and worsen your condition.
While you sit down on the couch with a pillow, Robby takes the empty bottles of alcohol on the table to throw them out, as well as the unopened ones in the fridge. "What are you doing?" you ask him, barely able to pronounce a word. "Taking away your drinks. It's bad for you; look in the mirror right now." he explains, putting the bottles in a plastic bag. "You're not my dad-" He interrupts you: "There's no discussing it." he snaps. He immediately calms down and sighs. "Sorry."
He sits down next to you on the couch, holding your hand. "Talk to me." You can see the sincerity and concern in his beautiful eyes. "Is it because of the breakup?" he asks while tears dwell up in your eyes. "Yeah." you reply, your voice breaking. "I just... miss you." His grasp on your hand tightens firmly. "I know." he adds, crying softly as well. "But... I'm still not ready to commit to a relationship. I'm sorry. I just have a lot on my mind." he explains. "I know, it's fine."
His voice starts breaking. "No, I know it's not. You're drinking yourself to an early grave and cutting yourself until you bleed out. It's not fine, Y/N." You look at him with teary eyes, realizing he still cares. "I never stopped caring about you, even after the breakup. You're still precious to me... you always will be, Y/N. You helped me at my lowest, let me help you." He wipes away the tears from your eyes. "Thanks, Robby." He caresses your face softly. "I don't want you to end up like my dad because of me. Drinking your life away, being drunk all the time, just being sad and pathetic." he says, earning a little laugh from you. "He got better now, you can too." he adds, kissing your forehead.
"Let me get you something to eat." he says, standing up and going through your fridge. "Here, you had some pizza in your fridge. Also water." he says, smiling. You giggle. "Thanks." you reply softly. He sits down next to you once more and eats with you. He sighs out of relief.
"I still love you, Y/N. And I still care about you."
232 notes · View notes
papermint-airplane · 4 months
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Eleanor: Whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean 'who is Aiden'?! He's the Bachelor! You know, the whole reason we're competing in the first place?!
Angela: Surely you can't be serious!
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Rose: I am serious! 🤭 And don't call me--
Viridia: IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE, I WILL END YOU MYSELF.
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Eleanor: Gaaaaaaah, I hate you people.
Angela: Then I guess I need you to explain a lot more than the murder attempt because if you aren't competing for Aiden's heart -- the alleged premise of the show -- what are you competing for?
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Rose: I. keep. TELLING YOU! I want to WIN! 😠
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Angela: Yes, but win what?!
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Rose: Uggggh, you're so dense, it physically hurts. 😩
Viridia: STOP TALKING IN CIRCLES AND JUST EXPLAIN SOMETHING FOR ONCE!
Rose: Haven't you ever heard the expression 'winning isn't everything, it's the only thing'? 🙄
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Angela: Yeah, I've heard toxic Little League coaches say that to crying seven year olds. And?
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Rose: Seriously?! It's the principle I've based my entire life on! It's my mantra! My raison d'être! 👿
Viridia: WATCH OUT, SHE'S GOING FRENCH AGAIN.
Angel: So the whole reason you snuck back into the house, disguised yourself as a mime, sloppily painted your blue stripes purple, tried to kill Angela, and potentially scarred Aiden for life was...because of an expression everyone uses ironically?
Rose: It's not ironic to me, dammit! It's my sole purpose in life! Everyone knows that, even the Watcher! And she...she used it against me. 😓 She promised me that if I made the competition interesting for her, she'd let me back into the house.
Eleanor: Wait. What?! Say that again.
Rose: When I broke into her control room, she made me an offer: I'd get to come back and compete again as long as I did something to shake up the status quo. She was getting bored of you idiots. 🥱
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Angel: I-I can't believe this.
Bailey: I know what you mean...
Angel: One of us got to meet the Watcher in person and it wasn't me.
Rose: Look, Angel, if it makes you feel any better, she's not what you think. She's...crazy. 😦
Bailey: High praise coming from you.
Rose: And not only that, she seriously doesn't know how 'Earth reality shows' as she calls them work because holy shit, this whole thing has been one clusterfuck from the beginning. 🙄 She says it's a Bachelor-type dating show but she's run the whole thing like a survival show with the challenges and eliminations. I mean half of us haven't even met this Arwin-or-whatever, let alone been on a date with him. What sense does that make?! 😵
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Aiden: It's Aiden. I'm Aiden!
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Eleanor: You're right. I thought this whole thing was shoddily arranged but I've never seen any reality dating shows. For all I knew, this is how they're supposed to be.
Rose: Well I've seen hundreds of them, and believe me, this is not how they're supposed to be. Arlo is supposed to spend time with all of us one-on-one, not be shoved into a pod by himself ninety percent of the time. 😣 I don't know how they do shows like this back on her planet but it's not how we do it on Earth. 👽
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Eleanor: On...her...planet? The Watcher is an alien?
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Rose: Well duh. 😑 You couldn't tell? Why do you think she abducted us all at the casting call? She had to get us on more familiar turf.
Angel: That doesn't make any sense. The Watcher can't be an alien. She's an eternal extra-dimensional being of pure benevolence.
Viridia: WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR RELIGION, ALREADY?! CLEARLY SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON.
Eleanor: I knew it, we really are in the Lunar Lakes moon settlement. I could tell from the trees. But...why are we the only Sims here?
Rose: I don't know and I don't care. 🤨
Wow. You really exposed me to everyone, huh, Rose?
Rose: You exposed yourself! You should have just let me win from the jump and I wouldn't have had to tell everyone what I knew. 😖
I guess it really is a good thing I didn't tell you the whole plan, then, huh? Otherwise you'd have run your mouth to Aiden.
Rose: Yeah yeah, Argyle or whoever-the-fuck. Well, I held up my end of the bargain. You're going to call this whole thing off and just announce me the winner, riiiiight? 🤤
Why would I do that?
Rose: Because...I made things interesting for you, like we agreed on. 😕
Then why am I still bored?
Rose: I-- 😶
You haven't won anything, Rose. You're still the same loser you were when you walked into this place on the first day. And that's all you'll ever be.
Rose: ...
Nothing to say to that?
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Rose: I am going to kick. your. ass. 😡
[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]
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kosmicpowers · 2 months
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HOLY SHIT.
Oh my God...
i thought it was a joke guys I'm sorry I didn't know.
I wanna say something but whatever I do isn't enough.
Like. It won't bring him back.
I'm not even like really crying right now I'm just sitting here typing this and shaking. Should I be crying cause I feel kinda bad? I'm mostly just shocked and confused?
4 notes · View notes
madrone33 · 1 day
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UNDERWORLD SAGA LEZ GOOOOO
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S HERE OMG AHHHHH
SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP
Here is my reaction to the songs! Written last night, because australia is the superior timezone :D
WARNING: Extreme spoilers, because duh.
HOLY FUCK IT'S HERE!!!!
Oh god oh god ok calm down I'm shaking it's hard to type of fuck it's hAPPENING!! Ok. *breathe* Press play.
the boat sounds!
the electric guitar!
ooof that dark "good"
SCREAMS OF THE UNDERWORLD
INFANT BELL
HARMONIES!!
OMGF G IT'S POLITES NOOOO
I'm legit tearing up rn
Ody sounds so broken
WAIT NO NOT THE WAITING MOTIF
NOT THE MUM NO 😭
He sounds like a little kid again noooo
NO NOT THE DUET
NOOOOOO
I'M FUCKING CRYING
AGHHH
Oh god he's snapped now
Also this end part is from the vid where he explains how he made the music for it!
*breathe* Onto the next one. AHHH IT'S NO LONGER YOU I'M NOT READY
OOOH Mason sounds so good!!
"There is a world where I help you get home, but that's not a world I know..." Oh no not right after seeing his mum dead couse he took too long that line is so much worse now!!
Those high notes tho
"hells" ha
Oh fuuuuck
Oh Ody's PISSED
the stakes are rising while ody is spiiiiiralling
wait fuck PAST romance.
the ORGAN! THE CHORUS ARRRRHHHH
oh shit oh shit oh shit
DANGER MOTIF IN BOLD
Take a drink of water. Calm. Oh fuck it's Monster- Ok ok lets do this.
Whatever this sad guitar tune is, it must be some call back, right?
OH IT'S THESE LYRICS!! FROM GENIUS LYRICS!
Oh odysseus no you're ok 🥺
Nooo you're tyring your best doooon't
Oh the infant strings!!
The vicious disgust in his voice with the trojan horse plan omgggg
Ruthlessness ohhhhh fuuuck
not polites and the mum!! This hits so much harder now!!
oh change on the infant rap? It's gonna take a bit to get used to that lol
the "MONSTER" backing vocals seems kinda quiet?
PE-NE-LOPEEEE! TE-LE-MA-CHUSSS!
RUTHLESSNESS FUCK
FUCKING MIC DROP ON THEM ODYSSEUS FUCK YEAH
HOLY FUCK! HOLY FUCK! THAT WAS AMAZING! IT'S OVER NOW! SHIT! OMG I CAN'T! IMMA LISTEN AGAIN WTF THAT WAS AMAZING!!
ARHHHHH! SO GOOD! SO GOOD!
Thank you, Jorge, and everyone else involved in this masterpiece. Thank you so so much. I love it. It's amazing. Thank you. 💙
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overandoutthere · 7 months
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i can't even make a melodramatic post abt wanting to scream until i pass out or craving a medically induced coma i'm beyond the point of exaggeration i just want an answer i just want to feel better. my life is so limited by this i am so fucking sad and scared. holy shit i am so fucking scared like i'm ten years old and my dad has holes in his arm from an infection eating his skin. i'm at my desk shaking so badly i can barely type bc i don't know how to keep doing this and no one ever says the right thing bc there's no right thing to say i shouldn't have taken such an early lunch because the next four hours are going to be impossible. zero days without a crying at work incident.
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ch33z-wiz · 1 year
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I headcannon Lloyd to be an OSDD1B system. My only evidence is ✨️trauma ✨️ and I'm part of a system and want characters to relate to lol
Any who here are some incorrect quotes based on that. Also Lloyd has introjects of Harumi and Morro (cause I said so) "F." Will stand for factive/fictive.
There's also a little named Raina
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F.Harumi: Ew why do you look like that? You're ugly
Harumi: Don't you look exactly like me in the headspace?!
F.Harumi: Yes... but not ugly like you
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F. Harumi: Hey Rumi
Harumi: Yeah....
F. Harumi: I'm an introject of you right?
Harumi: right...
F.Harumi: And I exist because of you... so does that mean you're my...
Harumi: Rumi please no
F.Harumi: My mommy?
Harumi: Holy shit Overlord please crush me with another building
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Lloyd: Dad I need to tell you something....
[Ressurected] Garmadon: What that an evil is coming to destroy Ninjago? Cause if so I am NOT-
Lloyd: NO! Not that. I *sigh* I was diagnosed with OSDD1B its like DID, meaning I have alternate identities but don't have memory loss beteeen them, I've known something was up for a while but now I know what it is...it's because of repeated early childhood trauma
Garmadon: Trauma? What trauma could you have
Lloyd: Seriously?!
Garmadon: yes seriously
Lloyd: Let's see, I was abandoned by BOTH of my parents. Lived in a boarding school where I was bullied constantly, and then discovered I was the Green Ninja and would have to fight my father to to the death. Not to mention I was kidnapped almost died in LAVA prior to discovering that? "
Garmadon: Oh PLEASE that's a cake walk compared to what I've seen the past thousand years!"
Harumi (Gatekeeper): *struggling to keep Morro (protector) from fronting and beating his ass
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Darreth: So let me get this straight... you're a system?
F.Morro: Yes
Darreth: So...is there an evil alter
F.Morro: No, but we'll all become the evil alter if you don't shut the fuck up
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jay: Hey Lloyd where's the Halloween Cand-
Raina (Little): *shoving face with candy*
Jay: You aren't Lloyd...are you?
Raina: *shaking head*
Jay: COLE ITS YOUR TURN TO WATCH THE CHILD, I THINK ITS RAINA!
Cole: *yelling from the other ship* RAINA WANNA PLAY PRIME EMPIRE WITH ME? I HAVE CAKE!
Raina: *Usain Bolts her ass to Cole*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bully: HA! You're telling me the Green Ninja is a system? Oh is the little baby personality gonna cry?
Nya *being held back by Jay*: LET ME AT HIM
Kai *being held back by Cole*: WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU! KNOW ONE SAYS THAT ABOUT RAINA
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Raina: Kai! I wanna ride on your shoulders!
Kai: Sorry kiddo the body is a little too big for that
Raina: *death stare*
Raina: *ontop of a struggling Kai* IM THE QUEEN OF THE MOUNTAIN GIVE ME YOUR CANDY!!!
Nya: *dying laughing*
Cole: EXCUSE ME?! I HAVE SUPER STRENGTH I COULD'VE DONE IT
Raina: I know, I just wanted to mess with Kai
Cole: Oh my God you are the best child ever
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zane: Jay, Kai I require your assistance
Jay/Kai: Yeah?
Zane: I'm trying to assist Lloyd in figuring something out
Jay: What is it?
Lloyd: Someone messaged Harumi and I have no clue who. I don't know if they're new
Kai: I thought you remembered this stuff?
Lloyd: I do remember what happened, but I don't always remember WHO did it.
Kai: *reading text* "Just saying I'm hotter than you." This sounds alot like Rumi
Jay: Yeah, doesn't she like to call Harumi "ugly"
Lloyd: That's what I thought, but she said she didn't type it
Jay: Well then maybe Morro?
Kai: Yeah maybe
Lloyd: Nope not him either, Morro hates Harumi and would NEVER message her
Jay: Hmmm... maybe Raina?
Zane: The seven year old?
Jay: Yeah her, unless it was someone else? What aren't there like 13 of you?
Lloyd: I doubt it, I'll ask her
Lloyd: *sighs* She did it
Kai: Oh my FSM I adore that kid.
#headc
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fragileizywriting · 11 months
Text
sorry, SORRY, SORRY SORRY I JUST— SORRY
nsfm (ME.)
he just finds himself kissing the insides of her thighs on complete accident. just do what he does to luka to get him to come? that might work. sort of. she's no exactly the same, of course, but he can figure this out. he's watched porn before.
a lot of it.
whatever. he's allowed to. he doesn't even use an icognito browser.
oh, and she's so sensitive, too. it's not an act, the way she sighs and squirms as he presses open mouthed kisses against her pale, delectable skin. flat laps of his tongue against the insides of her thigh, reaching towards that perfect center, he feels drowsy in it. befuddled. she's a witch with her very own magic, something delicious, like honey and ambrosia. he's whipped. spellbound. he almost doesn't hear how she pants, spade slapping against the kitchen counter in frustration, wanting him closer.
the side of his fang catches the sensitive skin of her thigh. the noise that follows, that comes out of her like a shock, is sublime.
shaking thighs ease over his shoulders when he noses into the very center, parting her folds with a lick. fuck, he can't breathe. he's so turned on that he'll break. the illusion will give away. she'll push him away, giggle about him not being allowed to for keeping his royal designation a secret from her for so long. he'll probably cry if he can't finish what he's started.
after all, he knows just how wet and warm and tight she is inside. her mouth is proof of it.
"i'm going to finger you first, okay?"
"you don't need to do that," she huffs. "it'll be fine— kitty-cat—"
he grins something feral. "sorry, princess. i'm not going to tear you open, i'm not a dick."
"you're not a— oh!" she squeaks, eyes snapping down to where he sinks a pinky into her.
holy.
shit.
she's clamping down on him. this is obscene. a dim thought comes to him, something to do with how his family ring is getting covered in gold-dusted slick, but isn't that just poetic? he should stop trying to get whimsical in these types of moments.
"how are you so small?" he murmurs, his cock twitching at the idea of splitting her open. "you're suctioning my finger, how the hell am i going to fit in you?"
tears dot the corners of her eyes as she looks up. "please stop teasing."
"i'm much bigger than this," he continues, because when he's overwhelmed he's prone to blabbing on and on. "i think i'm going to hurt you a lot when i fuck you."
"you won't!"
"i don't know..."
she growls in frustration. "you think you're the only demon i've fucked?"
he finds himself baring his teeth, jealousy spreading through him like a wave. "try not to mention other people while i'm the one who's got you wet, princess."
she doesn't back down, of course, because he's unfortunately taught her to bite back just as hard. "i'll do whatever i like, thanks, and if mentioning that i've had other dicks in me before will get you to stop teasing and actually start working on getting me to come, then i'll do it. quit goofing around, adrien!" her teeth are so long when she growls, tiny and small because she's so miniscule compared to him. "eat me out before i don't let you touch me for the rest of the night."
with a push of her heel at his back, his mouth is pushed into her, and marinette sings. chest heaving, gasping out a cut out whine that sounds like she's melting, all the while opening up because of his tongue.
"adrien, god—" another whine, a mewl, a precious thing because she's got the audacity to be quiet while he's on his knees in the smallest kitchen in the world and lapping at her cunt like a dog— "more," she chants, fisting his hair until it actually stings, "please, please, more."
she's grinding herself against his mouth. his mouth is wet enough to sincerely drown. he's convinced himself that not even his tongue will be able to fit inside of her, this small little thing that absolutely will break and tear should he even give it a chance, but she's surprisingly receptive. his pinky finger was much too small for her, it seems, because a certain curl of his tongue has her squeezing against him.
fuck.
"oh, god, more of that," she pants out, "adrien, i'm so close, i'm— i'm really close—"
much too close, actually, because she cuts herself out with a whine. she orgasms against his tongue, slick gushing out of her as she gasps for a breath so sharp she must've bruised a rib.
when she's finally pawing at him to stop, thighs and legs twitching, he licks his fangs, similar to how she always does it. "you taste so good," he rasps out.
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