#i’m being normal abt this . surely

[maxpaulll]

Despite being *incredibly* behind on Redacted videos I still have Redacted thoughts from time to time.

Today? David and Angel who regularly shower together.

Not in the sexual way (okay, maybe sometimes in the sexual way) but in a sweet, domestic way. Washing each other’s backs and just taking care of each other in such a simple way. Just to make sure they’re clean.

Angel in the throes of burnout from work, they /have/ to shower to feel clean and like a person but they can’t bring themself to do anything more than sit under the hot water and evaporate, and David who stands behind them and patiently does their annoyingly long hair-care routine, applying their face wash, and gently spraying them down when he’s done-

David, who’s a wreck after the summer solstice, having Angel gently wash away all the sweat and tension away from the day. They’re massaging shampoo into his scalp as he melts, pressing kisses into his temple and wiping the soap from his eyes as they wash it out.

But it’s not just when they need it most. It’s almost every night (unless someone’s away) sometimes it’s just a weeknight and Angel is chatting about their day, or a late Sunday when David’s pulled an almost-all-nighter and Angel is trying not to fall asleep between the warm water and David’s calming presence.

That’s all vv

#redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted angel #redacted david #just thinking abt some stuff #gay stuff #do 9 out of 15 of these showers turn into “fun’’?? sure. but that’s the beauty of it #I just need to think about them being normal and domestic though #they’re freaks 24/7 let me think about them being normal for three minutes #anyways please enjoy my rambles #and I definitely 100% was NOT projecting onto Ange at all #ps Angel sits on the floor in a bathrobe while David braids their hair for bed #you can’t tell me I’m wrong #I mean you can #but I won’t listen

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

sometimes i remember that gojo wanted to tell geto “we’ll meet again, right?” just before he died but forced himself not to knowing it would have cursed him and then i start thinking about how kind and thoughtful gojo is as a character and how he hasn’t been able to lean on another human being since geto defected and then i want to . Scream

#like. there’s something almost helpless about that question. because gojo doesn’t *know* the answer…. he’s asking for reassurance #he wants to know if they’ll ever meet again even though deep down he knows the answer #and it’s so… bare? so vulnerable. #if he had voiced it that would’ve been the first time in TEN YEARS that gojo truly bared his heart to someone and asked for help #but he knew it would turn into a curse and so he gulped the words back down. :(( #gojo is such a sincerely kind and thoughtful character and it breaks my heart that sooo many people in the fandom can’t see that 😭 #he isn’t a saint and he definitely isn’t selfless but above all else his goal as a human being is to make sure no one ever feels alone. #that no one has their youth taken away from them….. that everyone gets a Choice in how to live their life :(((( it’s so important to him. #i just genuinely don’t understand ppl who insist that he’s morally gray ….. gojo is a consistently Good person and that never changes #he wants to have fun and laugh and he wants his students to enjoy their youth. he wants them to think he’s cool. #he’s the big brother slash father Ever and i love him to death #i got sidetracked this was supposed to be abt geto 😔😔 anyway the final scene between them will always be my Favorite ever #and the key to understanding both their characters and love for one another #ty for coming to my ted talk i’m feeling normal abt them today 😇😇 #ari noises ✩

[starscelly]

so is nobody going to publicly scream abt jake’s new mask or do i have to do it

wdym both of the stars goalies now have a couple of their closest teammates on their mask …. lol….. what do you mean. and it’s titled “otter and friends golf adventures”???? okay.

#also mush looks like ted lasso but that’s neither here nor there #what the HELLLLL #i’m being normal abt this . surely #jake oettinger #mason marchment #ty dellandrea #dallas stars

[itsalwaysforyou]

jay not asking coach about letting lonnie onto the team bc he doesn’t want to do anything coach might disagree with…….

#‘coach trusts me…’ like what if i cried #man i wish they made more of a thing of jay being TEAM CAPTAIN #<- i’ve made a post before abt how easily he gives it up & jay not liking positions of power etc etc #but i do think he treats the role like it could be taken away at any moment #coach TRUSTS him. holy shit coach trusts him #the first positive adult figure in his life trusts him to take care of the team #train them and critique them and lead them to victory #and coach probably wouldn’t have cared abt lonnie being on the team #but jay is sooooo hesitant to ask #coming from the ‘if you want it take it and if you can’t take it break it’ guy #like this is the one thing he doesn’t want to risk breaking……. #and then obviously he gives it up!!!!! #he gives up the thing coach TRUSTED HIM WITH bc it was the only way to let lonnie on the team #& mr ‘my only dislike is women being unhappy’ was like I CANNOT REST UNTIL LONNIE IS ON THE TEAM #it’s suchhhhh a sweet gesture not only from a hashtag feminism standpoint #but also character wise for jay #like this precious thing that coach has trusted him with but didn’t really want that much anyway….. #it’s going to mean more to lonnie if she had it. even though it means everything to jay #oh it makes me crazy #damn my mum was right. i think too deeply about things #im like i analyse things a normal amount and then i’m writing essays about 1 line from descendants 2 #I AM UNWELL #anyway. jesus christ #descendants #jay son of jafar #EDIT i’m not finished actually #do you think jay fears the repercussions? what would happen if he went against coach’s word? #bc sure. he knows coach is nice. he knows auradon isn’t like the isle #but. ‘you don’t want to be at my house at dinner time’……. #he is still scared of his dad. you know. he can never get the lamp he can never do anything right

[autistic-katara]

seeing ur beloved mutual reblogging some questionable shit (probably unintentionally) but not having the energy to argue or explain why </3

#please i dont wanna have to be the one to correct u fuckers every time u reblog a mildly disguised dogwhistle #goyish mutuals please talk to some jews (who r knowledgeable and want to educate ppl) #cause stg some of the stuff i’m seeing is 2 steps below nazi propaganda #and ik its most likely not malicious but god i’m so tired #please educate urself on some stuff #bcz some of the shit ur rbing could easily be found on some neonazi page if u just (((added some of these around the word zionist))) #or just replaced the word zionist with “jews” or smthn #or idk just so many posts if u tweaked the language just a little but kept the same message it would be blatant nazi shit #and yeah sure the post sounds normal nd everything or whatever but u gotta remembered the point of dogwhistles is to seem innocuous #to signal to other nazis to make them sound more sympathetic and to make ppl calling them out seem insane #just please guys i’m begging u watch out for those posts that r like #“the zionists in hollywood r censoring x” or #“oh no! x jewish celebrity is scared of antisemitism in their big mansion? so sad! lets address their hurt feelings right away #dead palestinian children can wait!” #or whatever #like yes what israel is doing is beyond fucked nd the us being supportive of it is gross but please ffs watch what ur reblogging/posting #think abt if its denying/downplaying antisemitism #if u replaced the word “zionist” with “jew” would it sound like a conspiracy theory? #are u dehumanising jewish/israeli ppl in any way? #(bcz yes not every israeli citizen is the actual devil yk i dont think my 2 month old cousin ever bombed anyone) #yk just please think before u post/reblog jesus fucking christ #idk i kinda went off on a whole rant here oops- #antisemitism #ryan shut the fuck up

[aeide-thea]

i do wish, like, literally anyone i knew were even a little bit hesitant or skeptical about the institution of marriage where i could hear them

like—i accept that presumably the thing can be done in a more radically ~examined~ way or whatever; but how does that happen if no one ever actually, you know, examines it through a lens that’s anything but rose-colored? or at least, not out loud where some actual collective discussion and theorizing could happen?

and also i just, as always, think there’s value in voicing a variety of visions for how to live, because i think a worldmodel in which there’s a default goal, and then a stigmatized alternative for those who can’t or won’t meet it, is in fact worse for everyone, even the normie or normie-passing, than a worldmodel in which that false, stifling binary gets expanded back out into a full range of free, deliberate, joyous choice, and the original default becomes just one of many, equal, gorgeous possibilities…

#like it’s hard to talk abt this bc people feel really protective and defensive of it #which i get! it’s near and dear to people’s hearts! #but it really makes me feel like an alienated freak even among alienated freaks #and there’s literally no one i can talk to about it #so it just feels like. i’m failing at this thing and failing to feel the right way abt this thing and it’s just like #increasingly a locus of resentment and bafflement and alienation and shame and silencing and deep unhappiness #anyway yes i guess i AM saying i want antimarriage Representation #hideous but there you have it! #like ultimately yes you have to just be fine with being a freak and a failure and whatever else #but like. honestly we all need some like-minded people #existing in total isolation is. really brutal actually. #so i guess i AM actually still on the side of more ~normalization~ despite all the backlash against that lately #like i’m SURE there’s been discussion of this by eg aros #but like. i don’t want to have to go read up by myself. i want there somehow to be room in my existing circles for questioning.

[ididntwanttohavetohauntyou]

The single tiny braid in Taylor’s hair last night is giving me life

#yes I am a tiny braid truther #or whatever you wanna call it #also she and Blake looked stunning #as usual #I’m being totally normal abt the braid for sure for sure #kaylor #gaylor #lgbetty

[celestial-toys]

been laying here listening to Lucky by Dermot Kennedy on loop for half an hour while thinking about Everything Stays and crying

#it’s good crying dw i am just. i have so many feelings about this story #Seven’s Celestial Commentary #Everything Stays #writing stuff #i may be stuck in bed struggling to type due to personal reasons but that will Not stop me from cooking up ideas for this fic #there is gonna be so much fucking angst and it’s gonna hurt soooooo good #the more i listen to it the more the possibilities expand #i can easily see Moon and Reader going back and forth between verses vulnerably arguing over Sun #but i can also see it being Sun and Moon getting real and discussingcougharguingover Reader #can’t decide which i like more #god i wish y’all could see this story the way it plays out in my head #next best thing would be to keep writing and sharing the story instead of vagueposting abt future plot points tho wouldn’t it lmao #and GOD don’t even get me fucking STARTED on Two Hearts… #Dermot Kennedy’s music is responsible for yet Another plot point for this story and i can’t even be mad about it. his fucking lyricsss dude #‘and so we jump to the THEATER??? in that SAME OLD TOWN???’ DO WE? FUCK I GUESS WE DO NOW!!! #picture me listening to that song and inspiration hitting me like a truck. diligently taking notes like the lyrics r instructions from God #‘she sees his face?? and HE sees HER as the LIGHTS GO DOWN???’ write that down write that down #‘the life that they should’ve had sat between them that night??’ FUCK Man yeah it sure did!!! #anyways it’s chill i’m chill. i’m very normal about my little stories and their musical inspirations! #and i’ve listened to these songs a very normal amount (translation: they will likely be in my top ten for the 2024 wrapped) #(cut to the scenes playing vividly in my head) ‘Well‚ at least I can always say that I /told/ her!’ #‘I can’t relate to having a heart like that‚ Sun! With all of your wonder and your trust intact…’ #like no i wouldn’t lift the lyrics directly for the song to use as dialogue but FUCk does it work well.. Lucky is such a good script for- #like- a heated conversation between my Relentlessly Positive Sun and my Apathetic Jaded Moon #‘How could our farewell mean as much as our time? Honey‚ I’ll be gone. It’s better if I’m something that you leave behind.’ #‘I used to paint these trees‚ now I just scream at the sky. Honey I was wrong. Guess there’s certain things you never leave behind.’ #*sobbing shaking throwing up clawing at the walls* I Am Normal About These Characters #anyways uh. on an unrelated note how many song lyrics do ya think i can cram into ES before it’s Too Many #gonna have to start getting creative with how i can incorporate more songs in a way that feels natural and not forced #even tho i am forcing it. i am forcing it very much bc i have songs with applicable lyrics and y’all Will read them one way or another

[mars-ipan]

honestly i don’t really think any mental illnesses have been like “destigmatized”- not fully at least. i think the stigma has just changed from demonization to “that’s not a real problem get over it god”

#obviously demonization is more Actively Harmful #but to say things like depression and anxiety have been destigmatized is. incorrect i feel #yes we are not treated like we’re evil. which is for sure an improvement #nobody deserves to be treated like they’re evil #but our illnesses are now being dismissed. ‘oh everyone has that’ not like me #‘you’re just being lazy’ i wish that were true #like. ok hold on let me use an example bc i’m worried abt reading comprehension on this website #(not my followers i trust u guys but i act as if every post i make will get popular) #my brother is autistic. i have GAD. #my brother was diagnosed when he was 2. he’s faced a lot of bullying from both kids and adults and it sucks and he didn’t deserve it #because of all that bullying (especially as a kid) he’s rejecting his autism and focusing really hard on being as ‘normal’ as possible #i was diagnosed last year at 17. i’ve been having these issues my whole life (my mom and i both saw it) but my issues were dismissed #by all the other adults around me (save for family) because i wasn’t visibly struggling and i was doing well in school #it made me doubt my convictions for a long time. what if i’m wrong? #as such i didn’t seek a diagnosis for a long time until my anxiety had gotten to a point where i knew i couldn’t keep ignoring it #now that i have that diagnosis i’m able to wield it as a weapon. my struggles aren’t made up #they’re real. and they always have been. and i can’t just ‘calm down’ like you can. and that needs to be respected #so while i think one is more actively harmful (bullying and harassment lead to self-rejection and loathing) #the other is also harmful- just passively (constantly being dismissed leads to self-doubt and not asking for help) #also why are people angry about the idea of a mental illness being destigmatized? #one group freeing itself from oppression isn’t gonna immediately forget about the groups who helped them get there #if i’m one day able to get perfect accomodations for my anxiety and nobody looks at me like i’m dramatic when i talk about it #i’m not gonna suddenly stop advocating for mental health issues to be normalized #if anything i’ll argue HARDER. you learned to understand me now learn to understand my siblings #learn to understand those with bpd. with psychosis. the sociopaths. the narcissists. the systems #i’m not gonna act like i have it worse than people who are heavily stigmatized. i’m not gonna get attacked for stuttering at mcdonalds #but that doesn’t mean i have /no/ problems and it doesn’t mean i think i’m better than anyone else #i don’t get why people fight each other about this. it’s a good thing so long as we remember where we came from

[vampire6bux]

thank you for talking abt your ocs so much i essentially stumbled onto your blog via tumblr suggestion but instantly became completely enamoured with them. is it ok if i throw virgo down a long flight of stairs for fun

NONNY RHIS MAKES ME RIDICULOUSLY HAPPY IM GRINNING SMILER RN IM THE HAPPY SMILER. YES YOU CAN ! THROW HIM DOWN THE STAIRS

like this.

#asky #nonny #oc:virgo #Giggling giggling ill b sure to talk abt them more just for U. I normally try not to cause I get scared I’m being annoying but #giggle!!‼️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥

[astxrwar]

having so many poly stevetony x reader thoughts,,, idk idk it’s just something about being the counterbalance to their deeply homoerotic rivalry,,,,

#‘i want to punch you in your perfect teeth’ or whatever he says in cacw #i want to write tony pov bisexual midlife crisis #like maybe it was weird of u to be obsessed w cap since childhood #let’s unpack that huh??? why r u so mad he’s nice and polite and pretty? #steve being absolutely unfazed by the pretty obvious fact that stark has a crush on him #whether he denies it or not. in my hc steve has known he was bi since 16 #steve Knows the signs. he was a traveling performer at 6’4 240lb w a sweet face. #im sure he got very used to men being like ‘ah. i’m having a crisis rn’ at the sight of him. #thinking abt tony denying it even when he lets steve suck his dick. skfnfkfk #the internal monologue of ‘no this is normal. he’s so fucking attractive nobody would find this unappealing it’s captain america #i have ideas for how each part of the triangle sort of like. gets together but idk how i want the poly thing to occur. #like ik probably one person A walks in on pair BC. but who’s A and who are B and C. if you know what i mean #anyway this got long and kinda rambly #steve rogers #tony stark #steve rogers x reader #tony stark x reader #stony x reader #yes im using tags. the dopamine is simply necessary for getting me back into writing again #im in my ‘acknowledging and accepting my hedonistic tendencies for motivation’ era

[chryzure]

dragging my hands down my face. chryzure….

#memorie.txt #sobbing abt them. they’re so. i. ughhhh #the fic i’m writing kills me. all the variations of azure’s mental state versus chrysi somehow being wiser than him #he thinks he can hold onto everything and leave chrysi with only the happy things or the things she can do smth abt #and then chrysi has to stop him from destroying himself in an attempt to break their curse #and he always cries. not this time blue. this isn’t our happy ending. but don’t bring the tragedy before its due #the lives where azure forgets everything always happens after he goes over the brink & chrysi can’t stop him #it wipes his mind of all previous lives. not sure if that’s a blessing or not #then of course. the next life he remembers everything. goes crazy. starts a cult. then the next life he’s like #‘not rlly sure what that was about. im normal now.’ #s.chryzure

[munamania]

#sorry to these british men what can i say i was 13. i was relatively normal about it at least. #poll #i will be upset till the day i die that my pictures w them were so shitty. it’s whatever tho #oh and i forgot my book w phil and had to run back <3 lol #if you were one of the bitches that went to the meet and greet with pinkish lighting.. hgghhggggg #p sure i’m phandom member 9977 btw 😌 #sometimes u need to reminisce abt being 14. things were terrible but i was so free

[909th]

how did you get on an alaskan fishing boat... i wanna too

*beautiful harp playing as if to initiate a flashback*

so basically when i was 17 i graduated from high school and i didn’t wanna live at home anymore and my sister was living across the country in anchorage w her fiancé so she let me live w her and i started going to college there at which point i realized i was painfully broke like all the time and desperately needed a job. anyways flash forward ~3 months and i started dating this guy whos brother was a part of this dock crew and he got me a summer job there bc well nobody else would hire me. it was extremely grueling and scary and im pretty sure i was constantly on the edge of hypothermia the whole month but i met some incredible people and saw some really gorgeous sights and i learned so much shit i wouldn’t have learned anywhere else. i don’t think i’d ever do it again but it was an invaluable experience. would recommend it if u rlly love to make urself suffer.

#id go into more detail but i don’t wanna be one of those ppl who brags abt how hard the work they did was #but i’m great at tying knots now #and identifying stars/constellations/planets #also not being able to shower for a month gives u a deep appreciation for indoor plumbing #i’m not sure how normal ppl get these jobs tbh i just knew a guy #asks

[cherrysnax]

I once heard that dreaming about someone constantly means that they’re thinking about you. Maybe these people miss you too?

kneejerk reaction is that I hope they’re not thinking of me tbh

#is that the truth? I’m not too sure. I just think it’s be easier to be okay with the concept of everyone forgetting me forever than to sit #with the mortifying possibility of being known and remembered #I don’t remember my hs self fondly so I don’t see why anyone else would yknow #I was already kinda convinced everybody hated me before I vanished so I guess. if ppl are thinking about me it’s negative #it’s scarier if it isn’t lmaoo #I don’t know what’s wrong with me #but yeah I don’t think it works like that nonnie or at the very least I hope it doesn’t <3 #I think I’m just a weird guy whose brain is trying to hold on to idealized memories of the past because he’s afraid of growing up #n wishes they had the insight they do now back then. if I had known I was a nb lesbian dealing w massive comp het #if I had known abt the bpd I could’ve realized that I split on ppl and myself #i was so excited to have friends and be cared about man #I hate that little guy I was but I don’t blame them for being stupid and not understanding shit. I wish I could slap my younger self on the #back of the head and be like “’be normal dumbass ur friends like you’’ #I uhh often focus on hurting myself more than not hurting the people around me and it was rlly bad back then #asks #nonnie #this is all to say that I think that the constant feeling of instability and academic stress is causing me to subconsciously wish for the #the days I perceive as being easier. it’s a mishmash of real events and things that possibly could’ve been if I was normal #I believe I want a feeling of control or something? idk. idk that contradicts everything #dreams are just dreams. I’m probably just regretting how much of senior year I lost and that’s it

[oldtestleper]

Barry hbo literally makes me. bite snarl bark etcetera. insane fucking insane. this tv show is an essay this tv show is 10 essays. yes I’m very stoned right now and yes i truly believe this is a stupid good tv show

#i think what it explores abt violence & abuse & forgiveness & redemption is really intelligent and nuanced and coherent? i don’t know I #think I want to study bill hader under a microscope that is for SURE. i want to have him write responses of 150 words or more to at least 20 #detailed questions about his opinions on things. in terms of his influences and sources and references and ideas and so forth I mean #i don’t know. people are like ‘wow that is not normal Barry is insaneeee’ but having been close witness to several cases of gaslighting and #emotional abuse. it was weird that he was saying it in such a forthright and unapologetic manner but what he was describing—the envi #envi​ronmental changes. the harming/killing of pets w a certain amt of plausible deniability; the goal of isolation and mistrust of other - #people; the erosion of the sense of self esteem; the sensation of one’s brain ‘eating itself’— are all overt & specific gaslighting tech - #techniques. the joke is that he doesn’t ‘know’ it as emotional abuse; he understands it as a #particular ‘technique’ of his job. hader is equivocating the violence of IPV to the violence of the military/people ‘following orders’/ #‘killing bad guys’. all these forms of violence are in effect the same violence; & in that regard the rules of choice; self-determination; #guilt; forgiveness; and repentance apply. #it’s not a terrifically original idea* but I think the ways it /presents/ these ideas and deconstructs and explores them is really smart & #*that military/state/‘justified’ violence is allegorically/symbolically/materially related to interpersonal/(esp. qua)intimate-partner #- violence. anyway. like it’s been said before #in terms of being a rhetorical tool. #but like I said I think the value is in the nuance and critical consideration of the perspective. and the clarity of the message also #idk like I said. essays. also like I said I am quite high so. perhaps most of this is nonsense. however I’ve learned not to discount my #stoney writing too much. it got me thru last semester and ultimately also thru this one #antwayyyyy that’s enough of my thots. maybe I’ll make a real post later. I’m still having computer trouble so idk might be too hard :/// #.txt #we’ll see. #barry hbo #I’m trying to keep myself entertained and my research muscles engaged so my brain doesn’t j fallow lol.