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fetusgooseandjuice · 1 year

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Better Boyfriend (Pt. 2)

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: Your boyfriend’s true colors have finally been revealed to everyone. Has this opened up new doors for your future with Natasha?

Word Count: 3,258

TRIGGER WARNING: Domestic Abuse & Rape

Stark!Reader

Your POV:

My hands were shaking as I pulled into our driveway. Hayden was already mad that I didn't tell him where I was going, so he's probably furious now that it took me so long to get home. I also somehow managed to drag Natasha and Wanda into this too. I know they're not gonna let it go until I open up to them, but I can't burden them like that.

As I opened the front door and walked into the house, I was met by an enraged Hayden. He pulled me into the house by my hair and slammed the door before shoving me against it.

"Where the fuck have you been." he sternly said, inches away from my face.

I was too shocked to respond which just made him even more mad.

"I asked you a damn question!" he yelled at me.

"I-I'm sorry I was a-at the compound because they wanted me to do game night w-with. then" I said quickly trying to defend myself and deescalate the situation.

"Oh what, so you think you can just go out and do whatever you want now huh?" he said as he let go of my hair, slowly backing up and nodding his head.

"No baby that wasn't it. I meant to text you but I-I guess it slipped my mind. I was only planning to stay a few hours though and then come home to you." I said softly attempting to calm him down while stepping forward to gently cup his cheeks with my hands.

"Yeah I bet you were hanging out with that Natasha, weren't you." he said in disbelief.

"W-what?" I asked confused, letting go of his face.

"I've seen the way she looks at you. I mean come on she practically has heart eyes, and you just let her?" he said raising his voice.

"Hayden baby, no that's not the case please calm down-" I started to plead, but was interrupted with a harsh slap across the face.

He grabbed the collar of my shirt and pushed me against the door much rougher this time. "Do not tell me to fucking calm down. You want me to calm down, I suggest you choose your words wisely." he aggressively said as he pointed a finger in my face.

"I-Im sorry I won't do it again baby please." I was begging for him to stop at this point.

"Yeah I bet you won't. Now what's for dinner I'm starving over here." he said and let go of my shirt, walking into the living room.

"I'll go get started on dinner right now I promise." I said as I went to prep the food hoping that this will make him happy.

~~~

After I finished cooking, I plated the food and made my way into the living room to serve it to him.

"Here you go. I made your favorite." I said as I handed the plate to him.

"Thank you baby. Look I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean it, I just had a bad day at work and I took it out on you I'm sorry." he apologized like every other time he had hit me.

"It's okay Hayden. I understand it's okay. I shouldn't have left without telling you." I said as I sat on the couch next to him.

"You're always so forgiving. That's one of the reasons I love you so much, you know." he smiled and leaned over to kiss my lips before starting to eat his food.

Natasha’s POV:

The team had decided to head up to bed after Peter somehow won another round of Mario kart. Thor and Tony were the first to leave because the game was 'glitching' which made them lose and it made them mad.

I didn't want to go to sleep just yet. Even if I was tired I don't think I'd be able to sleep because I've been thinking about Y/N ever since she walked out of that door. I know she's not safe with Hayden and I still let her go back to him. But she probably didn't feel too safe with me either at the moment considering the way she flinched.

If I had just told her how I felt before she met Hayden, then maybe she wouldn't be going through this right now and she would be laying in my arms instead. I decided to go talk to Wanda since she's always willing to listen.

I made my way to her room and knocked on the door. I opened it after she said I could and walked inside before closing the door. I flopped onto the bed and heavily sighed.

"You okay?" she questioned.

"I don't know." I replied.

"You wanna talk about it or do you wanna just lay there and think?" she asked.

"I don't know what to do about Y/N." I answered.

"What exactly do you mean by that?" she replied trying to get me to give her more detail.

"Hayden isn't the right person for her. Anyone would think that if they knew everything we do. He hurts her, Wanda. Y/N is so sweet, and kind, and gentle. He's abusive and dangerous. She doesn't deserve that." I explained.

"You're right. she doesn't deserve that. But we can't help her unless she lets us. We don't know everything that goes on behind closed doors. So unless she's willing to talk to us about it, we can't do much except let her know we're there for her." she said.

"I know. But I also know that I could treat her better. I've loved her in silence for four years, and she's with that damn guy who's putting her through so much. I could be the better boyfriend." I rambled.

"And I believe you, Natasha. But she's scared. She's afraid of what he'll do if she tries to leave considering he hits her over things that will never be justifiable. I mean we don't have to know the full story to know that." she voiced.

"Do you think we could convince her that she deserves better and doesn't have to be scared. If she knows we're there for her then she might get the courage to break up with him. We could even be there when she does it." I express.

"That may work. But we also can't be too forward or demanding about it because she's already practically being controlled by him and if we're not careful, we might frighten her." she said.

"How do you always know what to say." I asked.

"Well you do rant to me a lot about Y/N so I guess I just learned what you need to hear." she joked.

"Do I really talk about her that much?" I playfully question.

"You're practically obsessed with her, Natasha." she claimed and I laughed knowing she wasn't all that wrong.

"Well good night. I'll see you tomorrow." I said as I stretched before getting up to go to my room.

Your POV:

The next morning I had gotten a text from my dad that he wanted me to come for dinner tonight and I should bring Hayden because he hasn't seen him in a while.

I agreed and went to go inform Hayden of the plan.

"Hey baby," I said as I walked into the bedroom.

"Fuck baby you made me die!" he yelled as he aggressively clicked the buttons on his keyboard, playing some video game.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to." I quietly apologized.

"Why are you even in here, what do you want?" he asked annoyed.

"I was just gonna let you know that my dad wanted us to come by for dinner tonight if that was okay with you." I said wanting to make sure that he knew I wasn't trying to do this without his permission.

"Yeah fine whatever I don't care." he blankly replied.

"Okay. I was also just about to get a snack from the kitchen, do you want anything?" I asked.

"As a matter of a fact-" he started as he paused his game, stood up from the chair and started walking towards me.

"I do want something." he finished when he got to me, putting his hands on my waist and starting to kiss my neck.

"I want to apologize for how rude I've been to you lately." he quietly said.

"Hayden I-" I was interrupted.

"Shh baby let me make it up to you." he whispered as he began running his hands under my shirt.

"Hayden I don't- I'm not in the mood right now. We can do this later I promise." I tried to reason with him because I really didn't want to right now.

"Now you know better than to deny me of what I want, Y/N." he said sternly.

"I know baby I'm sorry. I just don't want to do this right now, please." I pleaded as I started to push on his chest.

He sighed annoyed, "If you know better, then why are you doing it. Shut your mouth and show me how sorry you really are." he pushed me back onto the bed before starting to undress and climbing onto of me while my eyes began to form tears.

~~~

It was now evening, and we were in the car on our way to the compound.

"You remember the rules I told you?" he asked with his eyes still on the road.

"Always stay with you, don't talk to Natasha alone, and don't tell anyone what you do to me." I answered.

"Good." he said as we pulled into a parking space and got out of the car.

I stayed by his side as we walked inside the compound, and he put his arm around my shoulders.

"Hey Y/N wanna play Mario kart with me?" Peter asked when he saw me walk inside.

"In minute Pete. I'm gonna go find my dad real quick." I said and he nodded.

I found my dad in the kitchen talking to Steve. When he saw Hayden and I, he put his cup down and walked over to me to give me a hug even though he just saw me yesterday.

"Hey Y/N, Hayden. I haven't seen you in a while, whats going on?" he asked as he shook his hand.

"Nothing much. Work has me busy so I apologize that I don't get to come around that often, sir." he replied with a smile as he put a hand in his pocket with his other arm still around me.

"Ah don't worry about it, I get it. I think Wanda just finished with the food so everyone's starting to take their seats now if you wanna go ahead and do the same." my dad said.

"Thank you, Mr. Stark." he answered with a small smile and nod of his head as he moved his hand to the small of my back to guide my towards the dining table.

He pulled my chair out for me before taking his own seat next to me. "If only he was always this much of a gentleman", I thought to myself.

Clint, Peter, and Thor sat down while talking about a new video game that came out when Hayden leaned over and gently turned my head to quietly speak into my ear.

"I'm going to the bathroom, stay here. Remember those last two rules." he demanded and I nodded my head. He stood up and went to my dad to ask where the bathroom was before he disappeared out of my sight.

"Hey Y/N." a voice said. I looked up and I saw Natasha.

"Oh, hey Nat." I said with a small smile.

"Did you bring Hayden?" she asked.

"Yeah he just went to the bathroom." I told her.

"Ah okay. I'm sorry, about last night. I didn't mean to scare you or anything. I was just worried about you." she said as she sat down in the chair Hayden was sitting in.

"Really it's okay. I don't know why I flinched like that. It wasn't your fault it, it was me." I reassured her.

"Hey Y/N!" a different voice said. I turned my head and saw Wanda walking towards us.

"Hi Wands. My dad said you just finished cooking, do you need help with anything? Plating or dishes?" I asked.

"Nah I put Kate and Yelena on that job so I could come talk to you." she said.

"Yeah actually we did have something else we wanted to talk to you about if you don't mind." Natasha added.

Wanda started talking again but I stopped focusing on what she was saying when I saw Hayden walk back into the room. When he saw I was talking to Natasha he looked furious as he turned around and walked back down the hallway.

"Y-yeah um give me one second. I'm sorry I'll be right back." I told them as I got up to follow Hayden.

"Hayden baby wait-" I called out for him. He stopped walking away from me and turned to walk towards me.

"I told you not to talk to that bitch." he said with a low, angry voice.

"You told me not to talk to her alone. I wasn't, I was with Wanda and other people were at the table too." I tried defending myself.

"You know what I meant, Y/N. And you went and blatantly disobeyed me." he said turning around, slowly pacing.

"I don't understand. Why are you always telling me what to do. It's not fair, Hayden. I should be able to talk to whoever I want to without you getting all possessive and insecure-" I was finally standing up for myself which I guess made him mad because I was interrupted by a hand connecting with my face, followed by a harsh sting.

What I didn't know was that Peter had happened to wander down the hallway we were in, heading for his room to get his Nintendo switch. He turned the corner at the exact moment Hayden hit me, which had understandably shocked Peter.

He didn't know what to do so he quietly turned around and sped walked back to the dining room where everyone was now seated and starting to eat.

"Um, Mr. Stark-" he began.

"Yeah, what's up kid?" he asked looking at Peter.

"I-I just saw Hayden hit Y/N." he said.

"He did what?! Hayden hit Y/N?!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah they were arguing and then he hit her." he confirmed Tony's worst nightmare.

"Where the hell are they?" Natasha demanded to know just as I walked back into the room with Hayden following behind.

Peter turned around and saw us, "Right there."

"Y/N?! Y/N honey are you okay?" my dad asked me as I emerged from the hallway.

"Yeah? I'm fine dad-" I started to say.

"Did Hayden hit you?!" he asked while looking at Hayden.

"What?! No! He didn't hit me, what- where-" I started asking confused as to who told him.

"Peter just said he saw Hayden hit you." Kate said from behind my dad.

"Did you hit my daughter?!" he said now asking Hayden.

"No sir I don't know what you're talking about-" he tried to say but was met with a punch straight to his face by my dad.

I was in speechless as Kate, Yelena, Wanda, and Natasha started surrounding me asking if I was okay. I watched as Steve and Clint pulled my dad off of Hayden.

I turned around to start walking to my room, overwhelmed by the amount of commotion happening. Wanda tried to stop me.

"Y/N wait-"

"Don't. Follow me." I said walking out of the room.

"I'll try talking to her." Natasha said, starting to head in the direction I went.

I heard someone knocking on the door, but I didn't feel like answering. I looked up when the door opened and closed anyways. It was Natasha.

"I said not to follow me." I reminded her.

"I just wanted to check on you and talk to you." she said softly. I stayed silent.

"Why did you put up with him for all those months." she asked.

I shrugged my shoulders, "I was scared."

She didn't say anything back knowing that I wasn't done yet.

"Scared he would hurt me more if I tried to leave." I finished.

"You know you could've asked us for help. We told you that." she said as she put a comforting hand on my elbow.

"I didn't wanna drag you guys into my mess. I got myself into it, I should've been able to get myself out, but I was scared." I told her as I started crying.

Natasha pulled me into her chest and held me as I cried.

"I've always been here for you Y/N. I want to be apart of your mess." she replied. I looked up at her confused and she could tell I didn't know what she meant. So she took a deep breath and continued talking.

"I've been in love with you even since we met Y/N. I didn't know how to tell you, and the day I was planning on telling you just happened to be the day you brought Hayden into the picture. I knew that I could be a better boyfriend than him and that you deserved someone better. I know I had time to tell you before that, but I was scared. I was too late and I didn't know what to do." she finished.

"Well you're not too late anymore." I quietly said.

"What do you- are you-" she stuttered confused.

"I like you too, Natasha." I cleared it up for her.

"Y-you do?" she asked in disbelief.

"Yes Nat. I thought I liked Hayden but I guess I was just looking for a distraction." I confessed.

She just started into my eyes.

"Can I kiss you?" she whispered and I nodded my head.

She placed one hand under my chin, gently titling my head up, keeping the other hand on my waist. She leaned in to place her lips on mine, giving me the most soft, loving kiss anyone has ever given me.

I deepened the kiss by putting my hands on both sides of her face, pulling her closer. We only pulled away slightly when air became a necessity.

"I've been wanting to do that for the longest time." she whispered and laughed.

"Was it just like you expected it to be?" I asked, hopeful.

"It was better than I ever could've imagined." she smiled and kissed me again.

Eventually the mental and emotional strain of the day finally caught up to me, so we switched to cuddling. Neither of us minded though.

Natasha laid down with her head propped up on a pillow as I curled into her side with my head nuzzled in the crook of her neck. She had her arms wrapped around me while one of my hands played with the collar of her shirt.

"Is it too early to tell you that I love you." she quietly said into my hair.

"I love you too." I told her and she kissed my head.

~~~

Later on, Wanda came to check on us, but backed away and closed the door again when she saw us cuddling. Me asleep on Natasha with her holding me.

"Took them long enough." she laughed to herself.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romonova #natasha x y/n #natasha marvel #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x you

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dreamsy990 · 6 months

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so 358/2 days, amiright? heres my thoughts

this game is just. god its an emotional rollarcoaster

i guess ill start with the things i dont like!! which is mostly the gameplay. i dont really mind the mission structure shockingly (i like being able to roam around but having a clear goal makes things easier for my adhd ass, and i think the miniature storylines are very good for the most part) but i simply could Not get into the combat. especially coming off of kh2 it feels so stiff and unfun to play the only part of the game where i enjoyed the combat was fighting riku at the very end. i think the panel system is okay but i dont like that levels take up space. why did they do that.

story-wise, i dont like the retcons!! a lot of the ones i take issue with are very minor but things like roxas only fighting riku once instead of the implied multiple times (even the dialogue doesnt make sense when you change that, why does roxas say 'how many times do i have to beat you' when theyve only fought once?) are the kinds of inconsistencies that just annoy me.

im also a little bit annoyed at the very concept of this game at all. i think roxas worked just fine as a character without this game. it feels sort of unnecessary in the grand scheme of things. also, xion. i love xion, dont get me wrong, but i dont think she adds anything to the series over all. thats not to say she doesnt add anything to this game because shes a great character and i love her, but shes just. kind of like this game in that if you got rid of her i dont think it would really change the narrative so much.

BUT DESPITE THAT ALL!!!!!!!! i fucking ADORE this game. it is genuinely so full of charm and soul that i just cant bring myself to dislike it. i think this is one of the best written games in terms of dialogue. every scene (at least for me) hit exactly as emotionally hard as i think it was meant to. i was laughing at demyx's antics and crying at xions death and yelling at saix and i think thats exactly how the game is meant to be seen.

days at its heart is a slice of life. its working a 9 to 5 its going through a depressive episode its losing friends its grieving its making fun of your coworkers its living. its a game about life and i love that.

this game really did make me forget that axel roxas and xion dont get a happy ending. i spent so much time looking forward to them making up that i forgot that roxas ran away. hell i almost forgot that xion died.

days is emotional and its story and its characters are just so fucking good. the conflicts all felt very real and you can tell exactly where everyones coming from. the way axel roxas and xion fall apart hits so fucking close to home. but god damnit if axel had any good communication skills like half of this could be avoided

its also one hell of a love letter to axel's character. hes always been one of my favorites (he recently earned first place) and i think this game does him a lot of justice. hes trying to do good. he wants to keep everything together he wants to be there for his friends he wants to make things right but he just cant. its just AUGH its so fucking good

that thing about axel's characterization really also applies to roxas. i dont have much to say about him beyond the fact that i think it does his character very well. also tism. hes so autism.

i kind of like the very limited graphics too. sue me i enjoy low quality games. the hands are not animated and they all have two expressions (blinking and not blinking) and their weapons are flat and im living for it. the very few fully animated cutscenes are good too!!

the (real, i dont count riku) final boss is unfortunately very easy. you can just stand directly in front of her and mash a she wont hit you its too easy but vector to the heavens did mess me up a bit. also earlier scene but "ill always be there to bring you back" with the other promise playing over it? fucked me up man. yoko shimomura is once again killing it

i cant believe roxas didnt get to go to the beach.

i have to give this game a 9/10. its writing is incredible but the gameplay could use a lot of work. its just not fun to play. but again the characters, emotions, and music all make up for that tenfold.

#kingdom hearts #kh 358/2 days #doodles #roxas #axel #xion #kh review

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thoriffix · 2 years

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you're telling me he gets THREE boyfriends???

words: 4.6k

summary: cole's dad assumes the ninja are dating, which - as far as cole is concerned - is ridiculous. of course, it sends him on a bit of a feelings spiral, and maybe he does in fact have a few crushes he has to deal with.

some polyninja goofs! set vaguely in s2 idk when exactly but uhh theyre living on the bounty and lloyd isnt aged up yet thats all thats important. also im trying out posting full fics on here for the first time! this is also on my ao3 ill link it in the rbs

enjoy!

"So, how are the boys?"

"Ugh, Dad." Cole rolls his eyes. Every time he visits, his dad ends up trying to get him to talk about the other ninja, and he doesn't understand it. "They're fine, same as always. Busy training, probably."

"Shame they never come to visit," Lou comments, sipping his tea. "I really would love to get to know them better."

Cole squints dubiously at his father, who seems to be trying to appear nonchalant. "...Why?"

"Well, why wouldn't I? If my son suddenly came home with one boyfriend I'd like to get to know him, let alone three!"

What.

Cole stares at Lou. He puts his tea cup down and furrows his brow as he tries to process. Dad thinks- okay. Dad thinks the ninja are his… boyfriends? The ninja. All of them. Boyfriends?

"We're not dating, dad," he says, after a solid few seconds of confused silence. Lou tilts his head.

"You're not?" he asks. "None of you?"

"No, none of us!"

Why would he even think that? Do they act like boyfriends? Dad didn't even know he was gay until a few weeks ago. Why would he just assume Cole’s friends were dating him? Or each other, for that matter?

"Well," says Lou, frowning. "I must have misread. Sorry, son."

"That's okay, dad," says Cole. His head is spinning, though. Misread what? Normal, friendly, platonic interactions between four close buddies? How could you possibly misread that? "What, uh- why would you… what made you think that?"

Lou hums, taking another sip of his tea as he thinks about it. Cole finds himself leaning forward in anticipation, and immediately feels weird about it. Why is he excited to know? That's weird. Stop it, Cole.

"You were the happiest I've ever seen you," Lou finally says, and Cole feels his stomach flip. "When you were fighting, yes, but even more so when you were just with them. The way you looked at them, I… well, it reminded me of myself when I first fell in love."

Cole really, truly, has no idea how to feel about that. He stares down into his lap. This isn't exactly a conversation he'd love to be having with the father he's fairly estranged from, anyway. Maybe once they were closer he'd be willing to talk about his nonexistent love life, but apparently it's happening now, because apparently he looks at the other ninja like he's in love with them, which is- well, it's a lot to unpack.

"Why so interested?" Lou asks teasingly, after Cole hasn't said anything for a few minutes. Cole’s stomach flips again.

"I'm not!" he defends, though he can't really deny that he is. When he thinks about it his heart keeps doing these little flutters. Maybe he just has a heart condition. That's probably more likely. A rare heart condition that only shows symptoms when he thinks about the idea of dating his fellow ninja. The idea of boyfriends. Having boyfriends. Dating them. Maybe even kissing them! He-

Wow, that heart condition sure is a doozy.

"Well, I'm not going to sit around and tell you how it looks," says Lou. "I think you might need to work out how you actually feel."

"Unhelpful, dad," Cole grumbles. His father laughs, and picks his tea back up.

"If you say you're not dating, I believe you. But maybe I wasn't misreading your expressions?" He raises his eyebrows and sips his tea meaningfully. Cole can feel his face going hot.

"Yeah, yeah," he mutters. "I'm changing the subject now. How's the weather been lately?"

–

Later, on the Bounty, Cole can’t stop thinking about it. What the fuck did his dad mean about him and the other ninja? He spends most of the day after he gets home stewing about it, brooding in various spots aboard the ship and generally overthinking. It doesn't make him feel any better in the slightest.

Eventually the others notice, because of course they do, because they share a space of a couple hundred square feet at best. Kai corners him on the deck first.

“Hey, man,” he says, slapping Cole on the back and joining him in peering over the edge of the boat. “You doin’ okay?”

Kai’s picked up a habit of checking in on the others the moment they seem even a little off, and he seems scarily attuned to when they’re not feeling great. It makes Cole smile. He’s a good guy. Much more sensitive and caring than his cocky outward self would have you believe, and Cole’s lucky to get to see it. Lucky to get to see his face, too, cause he’s sure easy on the eyes. And-

Cole’s cheeks go hot. Oh, boy.

“All good!” he replies, maybe a little too squeakily. Kai narrows his eyes suspiciously. His stunning, deep brown eyes. Cole scolds himself mentally. Where is this coming from?

“You went to visit your dad today, right?” asks Kai, and Cole nods. “That go okay?”

“Been worse. We, uh, talked a lot."

“Hey, that’s a start.” Kai smiles lopsidedly and reaches out, covering Cole’s hand with his. His palm is warm and comforting. Cole smiles back. “Wanna come play some games with the guys? We got some time.”

“We should probably be training,” Cole says, raising one eyebrow, but it’s more of a tease than an actual protest. He’d much rather play. If nothing else, it's fun to watch Jay rage when he's losing.

“Eh, what Wu doesn’t know won’t hurt him. C’mon.”

Cole allows himself to be led the relatively short distance from the deck into their room, where Jay and Zane are already battling it out.

“Ah, hello, Cole,” says Zane, pausing the game and turning to smile up at Cole with that sweet, awkward smile he always has. “Are you alright?”

“I’m peachy, snowflake,” Cole replies, grinning as he sits down between them. Zane tilts his head in apparent confusion. “I’m good. No worries.”

“Good,” says Zane. Kai sits down on Zane’s other side and picks up a spare controller, passing Cole the fourth. Jay nudges him.

“Ready to get your ass kicked?” he asks, smirking, and Cole just smirks back.

“I’d be careful who you threaten, motormouth.”

“Ooh, fighting talk!” exclaims Kai. “C’mon, I wanna get into it already!”

Zane sets up a fresh game. Cole sits there, idly playing with the buttons as he waits, and smiles. He’s got the best friends.

–

It doesn’t entirely clear his mind, but digitally brawling with the other ninja certainly makes him feel a bit better, right up until Wu finds them and scolds them for shirking their duties. He finds himself in the kitchen with Zane, washing dishes as Zane starts to get dinner ready.

“Do not laugh, please,” Zane says shyly. Cole blinks at him, and then suddenly realises that Zane is bashfully tying his pink apron around his waist. He feels guilty immediately.

“I won’t,” he promises. “Sorry for laughing at you for it before.”

“That’s okay. I understand it is a little silly. It’s pink, after all.”

“No, it- it still sucked for us to laugh. You don’t look silly. You, uh- pink suits you.”

It’s nowhere near a lie. Zane looks great in pink. He looks great in anything, honestly. Most of all, he looks great wearing the pleased smile that crosses his face at that. It’s infectious - Cole finds himself smiling too, distracted and scrubbing the same spot on a bowl over and over. He snaps his attention back to the dishes. FSM, what is with him? His dad’s comments must have got in his head. He doesn’t remember ever noticing the others’ appearances this much before, nor feeling this fluttery when he thinks about them. But then again, didn’t he? Weren’t they always this handsome, now that he thinks about it? Maybe the butterflies are new, but they don’t feel out of place, exactly. When he casts his mind back, maybe he does remember feeling a little fluttery whenever Kai puts his hand on his, or Jay poorly trash-talks him, or Zane makes extra dumplings because he knows they’re Cole’s favourite. He stares into the soapy water, suddenly unsure of himself.

“Cole? Are you alright?” Zane asks, placing a cold hand on Cole’s arm and pulling him out of his thoughts. Cole nods.

“Yep,” he says, and it’s not a lie. He’s just… confused, is all. There’s no way his dad was right, right? Not about them dating, of course, but about his, uh… feelings. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing? His dad, who he barely sees, picking up on Cole having a- well, multiple crushes before it even crossed Cole’s mind. “Sorry, Zane. Just thinkin’.”

“No need to apologise,” says Zane. “And, um. Thank you for saying pink suits me. I rather like it.”

He smiles, and then makes a beeline for the stove to start cooking. Cole watches him move perfectly around the kitchen, each movement graceful and well-oiled. The water's long gone cold by the time he actually resumes doing the dishes.

–

Dinner is perfect, as it always is when it's Zane's night to cook. Cole devours his own helping and then a fair bit of Jay's, when he isn't looking. Lloyd watches him sneak food off Jay's plate from across the table, wide-eyed, and then utterly fails to do the same to Nya, who notices immediately.

After the meal, Jay and Cole end up on the deck together, trying to make the most of the time before bed. The sun's gone down, leaving them chugging along through dusky indigo skies, a few stars twinkling above them.

"Don't think I didn't notice you stealing my food all of dinner, mister," Jay says, and Cole grins, embarrassed. Busted.

"Well, why didn't you stop me then?"

Jay shrugs. "I figured it would mean that you owe me! Besides, I know you love Zane’s cooking."

Cole knows for a fact that Jay also loves Zane's cooking. They all do. He doesn't comment on that, though, just raises an eyebrow instead. "Oh yeah?"

"Yep!"

He doesn't elaborate. Cole chooses to assume he'll be doing Jay's chores tomorrow. He rolls his eyes, and leans over the side of the boat. The moon is so bright tonight, illuminating everything in a pale glow. He chances a glance at Jay out of the corner of his eye, and sure enough; beautiful. Damnit. Why couldn't he have less handsome friends? And kind, too, and funny. And caring. And-

Jay catches him looking and scrunches up his nose, sticking his tongue out. Cole feels his heart skip a beat.

God damnit.

He has three whole stupid crushes, doesn't he?

And that means his stupid dad was right, too.

Cole stares down at the distant desert below them, slowly passing by. This is stupid. Feelings are stupid. They're his friends - his only friends, not that he really likes to admit it. Well- he still has Wu and Nya and Lloyd, but still. They're his team, for another thing. How's he going to fight effectively alongside them when all of a sudden he gets butterflies looking in their eyes for too long?

Jay pokes him. "Whatcha thinkin' about?"

"Just- stuff," says Cole vaguely.

"Ooh, mystery man, huh? Bet I can guess what you're thinking about."

"Jay, I-"

"Cake? Video games? The fact that it's your turn to mop the deck this week? Dragons?"

Cole should've known that vagueness would get him nowhere with Jay. Annoying, adorable little shit. Instead he just sighs and nods. "Yeah, uh, all of the above."

"Ha! You're so predictable, Cole."

I guess I am, Cole thinks, leaning on his hand and watching Jay's smug face turn to look back out at the clouds. He's only thinking a little bit about kissing him, which he's going to count as a win. He continues to think about it until they go to bed for the night, but it’s only a little bit, so. He’s doing well.

–

The next evening, Cole finally finds himself alone on the deck of the Bounty, having spent all day in the company of at least one of the other ninja, all of whom are suddenly the most attractive guys in Ninjago and he might be going a little bit crazy. Getting some time alone is rare under normal circumstances, but while dealing with this newest revelation it's nothing short of a godsend.

He begins pacing up and down the deck, debating just what he's supposed to do now. Right. So maybe, just maybe, he has three new crushes. Or, more like, he has three old crushes that he's only just noticed and is kind of kicking himself about in retrospect.

He has a few options, Cole supposes.

One, he tells them all how he feels. The idea of this one makes his stomach tie itself into twelve different knots and then throw itself off the side of the ship, so he's not really sure it's ideal. But then again, if it went well… he doesn't dare think about it. The odds of it going the way he'd like it to are so tiny that he doesn't even bother properly entertaining the idea. This option isn't really an option.

Two, he picks one of them to confess to and buries the other two crushes down deep and doesn't think about them ever. This one is more plausible, even if the idea of choosing between them seems impossible. Any time he thinks he's settled on one of them, one of the others will float into his mind and his heart will do the flutter again and he'll be back at square one. Besides, he doesn't even know if any of them would like him back. This option isn't ideal, but it's there.

Three, he buries all of them down deep and pretends they don't exist. This one, as far as Cole can see, has no downsides. Nothing has to change, no one has to get rejected or ruin any friendships or teamwork, and he can go on having fun with his best friends and never think about kissing them at all. Ever. It's the perfect plan.

Of course, perfect plans often have a little snag or two, which Cole discovers as soon as he marches proudly back into their living quarters and is met with three stupidly handsome and loveable faces.

For the next few days, Cole engages in what can only be described as the most miserable game of tag he’s ever played, in which he’s constantly running from his own gay thoughts attempting to catch him. Every time he sees the other ninja, his heart utterly betrays him by trying to thump itself out of his chest, and his brain betrays him even more by refusing to stop imagining them kissing him, or holding his hand, or even cuddling. Luckily, it doesn’t interfere with their ninja work too much, because Cole is a professional, and their well-oiled team is second nature at this point. At home, though? Well, those two days of performing arts school he attended are really putting the work in.

It doesn’t help that recently the ninja have become more affectionate than ever, constantly checking in on him and asking if he wants to hang out, and there’s only so many times he can turn them down without coming off rude or suspicious. He’s been hanging out with little Lloyd a lot instead. To be fair to the kid, he’s a lot of fun to hang out with, actually. Plus, as a bonus, the ninja don’t seem to be quite as affectionate when Lloyd, Nya or Wu are around, which Cole is putting down to them not wanting to exclude anyone from their little best friend group.

He’s hanging out by himself in the sleeping quarters, reading a book that Zane’s been trying to get him to read and eating a sandwich, when Nya pops her head round the door and says; “Hey!”

He glances over, brushes some crumbs off his chest, and sits up, putting the book down. “Hey.”

“What’re you doing in here? Everyone's up on the deck, training.”

She steps into the room and walks over to his bunk, sitting down next to him. Cole shrugs.

“I was tired?” he tries, and she laughs.

“Nice try. Wu will never let you get away with that one. Ninja never quit!” she says, doing a scarily accurate impression of Master Wu. Cole snorts, and then looks at his hands. It’s not that he doesn’t want to train. It’s more that Kai had bumped into him earlier and for some ungodly reason had reached out to brush a lock of Cole’s hair behind his ear, and Cole’s now worried that if he looks Kai in the eyes he might actually explode.

He’s not gonna say that. He just sort of shrugs instead.

Nya pokes his cheek. “What’s going on with you?” she asks, raising one eyebrow. Cole looks at her.

“What do you mean?”

She shrugs. “You’re acting weird lately. Around the guys mostly. You feeling okay?”

Damn. Cole cringes slightly. He’s probably being very obvious, huh? He opens his mouth, fully intending to make up some excuse, even if he has no idea what would sound plausible, but what actually comes out is; “I think I’m in love with all three of the other guys because my dad thought we were all dating and it made me realise I really like them all and I have no idea what to do about it and I was trying to ignore it but that’s really hard and I don’t wanna ruin the team or our friendships or anything and it sucks.”

Nya stares at him.

“And also I’m gay,” he adds, belatedly realising he's never actually officially come out. He’s pretty sure they all know, but still. Worth adding.

She takes a second, looking almost confused, and then laughs. “Okay,” she says. “Lots of information there, Cole.”

“Sorry,” he mumbles, smiling a bit himself. Her smile is infectious. She sighs, and then pats him on the shoulder.

“First of all, congrats on the coming out. I mean, I did already know, so. Y’know. Still congrats!”

“Thank you…?”

"Secondly, that's really cute. You should tell them!"

Cole stares at her. "Nya. You gotta be kidding me."

"I'm not! What's the worst that could happen?" She’s grinning at him, with a sparkle in her eye like she knows something he doesn’t, but he just frowns.

"Uh, I don't know. Everything? Breaking up the team for no good reason? Losing my only friends?"

"Pssh, that's nothing." She sounds cheery, but Cole's not smiling, so she sighs and pats his shoulder. "Right. Sorry. Unhelpful. But look, I really do think you should tell them. They're worried about you, y'know."

Cole blinks. "They are?"

"Yeah, of course. If nothing else, telling them will get you closure, right? Your friendship is stronger than you think, and they care about you, so even if they don't like like you back, is that really the end of the world?"

Huh. Cole looks down at his hands. "I guess not," he admits, frowning. It doesn't feel like it should be that easy. Admittedly, the idea of rejection does make him want to crawl into a cupboard forever, but Nya has a point. She grins again, toothily.

"I'm always right," she says, smug. Cole rolls his eyes and leans into her. She wraps an arm around him. "Oh, and I'm rooting for you, champ. I guarantee it’ll go better than you think."

“Why are you so sure?” Cole grumbles, and she opens her mouth, and then closes it again, shrugging.

“Just am!” she says, slightly sing-song, and he groans. Why is everybody he knows so smug?

–

"Hey," says Cole, and only Zane looks up. Kai and Jay are too busy intently focusing on the game they're playing, which, honestly? That's fine. Cole’s feeling pretty nervous, so the less eyes on him right now the better. "I need to talk to you guys."

"What's up, dude?" asks Kai, narrowing his eyes at the TV, and then groaning. "Oh, damnit, Jay!"

"Ha! Get good, loser!"

"Are you guys done?" Cole asks, feeling endeared and irritated at the same time. God, why'd it have to be these idiots? They pause the game, finally, and turn around to face him, nodding. "Okay."

"Are you alright, Cole?" asks Zane, looking worried.

“Yeah, I just- I have to tell you all something.”

“We’re all ears, bro,” says Kai, grinning up at him, and Cole’s heart flutters embarrassingly. Oh god. This is gonna suck. He takes a deep breath.

"I like you guys," says Cole. "Like, like like you. All of you."

There's silence. Cole resists the urge to squeeze his eyes shut so he can't see them all looking at him. This is terrible. His heart is pounding.

"...I thought we were all already dating?" Zane says, sounding genuinely bewildered.

“Yeah, I kinda- are we not?” asks Jay, putting down his game controller. Kai nods in agreement, frowning at Cole.

What.

Cole stares at them all. He’s desperately trying to see in their eyes if this is some weird prank, or joke, but they all look utterly baffled at the idea that they’re not all dating him. They all think they’re dating him? And each other? All of them?

This might be the weirdest turn of events in Cole’s life, and he once had an old man on top of a mountain ask him to become a ninja to help save Ninjago from evil.

“Wh- we are?” he says desperately, holding out his hands in confusion. The others make eye contact with each other and then look back at him, nodding. Cole’s head is spinning. “For how long?”

Jay shrugs. “I dunno, a couple of weeks?”

A couple of weeks? He’s saying that Cole could have been kissing all three of them for weeks? He must look shaken, because Kai holds out a hand comfortingly.

“How did I not know?” he asks. They look at each other again.

“I do not know,” says Zane.

“We just sort of assumed you wanted to take things slow?” explains Kai. “And we didn’t wanna push you or anything, y’know?”

Cole really does not know what to do now. He goes and sits on the floor between them all, and then suddenly has a realisation. “My dad was right,” he groans, dropping his head into his hands in shame. This is awful. Not only was his stupid dad right about his stupid feelings, he was right about them dating, apparently. And apparently, everybody was aware of this except for Cole!

Wait. “Wait,” he says. “Does Nya think we’re dating too?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m gonna tell my sister, dude,” says Kai, and Cole groans again. Great. No wonder she’d seemed so sure of herself when he asked for her advice. He feels a hand pat his arm slightly awkwardly.

“Are you alright?” asks Zane, sounding concerned, and Cole nods into his hands. It’s not quite settled in yet, given that this was the exact opposite of the outcome he was expecting and all. It might be starting to, though, given the way his stomach is starting to fizz with excitement.

“So,” he says, lifting his head out of his hands. They’re all looking at him with eyes that are far too soft and gentle and beautiful. “You’re telling me you all want to date me?”

“Well, I thought we all were for several weeks, so I’d say yes,” says Jay, and Cole partially considers dropping his head back into his hands. He puts them down on his lap instead.

“What now?” he asks. He’s pretty sure he’s just mightily embarrassed himself, so he’s half expecting one of them to go well, actually, we don’t really like you that much anymore, Cole, sorry! Instead, Kai starts grinning and adjusts himself so he’s on one knee.

“Well,” he says, making eye contact with each of them. “Would all three of you do me the honour of being my boyfriends? Officially, this time.”

Cole might be dying. His heart rate would certainly suggest that he is. Beside him, Zane giggles, and Jay groans and rolls his eyes.

“You’re so annoying,” he complains, and then leans forward and kisses Kai’s cheek.

“I would be honoured,” Zane says, seriously, and leans in to kiss Kai’s other cheek. Kai raises his eyebrows at Cole, the cocky grin melting into something softer as he looks at him.

“If you’d rather talk about it first-” he begins to say, before Cole gets his courage up and all but jumps forward to plant a kiss directly on Kai’s lips. They’re soft, and warm, and he can feel Kai smiling against his lips. His heart hammers furiously against the inside of his ribs as he pulls back and grins awkwardly.

“Yeah,” he says, slightly embarrassed by the way Kai is smiling at him. Jay makes a noise.

“My turn!” he says, and pulls Cole into a kiss as well, their noses squishing uncomfortably against each other and teeth clacking slightly. He pulls away, slightly dazed, and Jay all but sparkles at him with the joy in his grin. Zane clears his throat politely.

“May I?” he asks, and Cole nods, his head spinning too much to answer properly. Zane leans in and kisses him, much gentler than Jay, and then pulls back after a moment and smiles. Cole’s tempted to pinch himself, just to make sure this isn’t some big self-indulgent dream. His heart is calming down, convinced that all is well.

“Glad we got that sorted!” chirps Jay, picking his game controller back up. “Cole, do you wanna join the game next round?”

Cole has to laugh. He feels a bit ridiculous. Knowing that he could’ve been happily with them all for weeks rather than tearing himself up inside trying to escape his crushes stings a bit, but at least he got this outcome instead of something worse. Honestly, this is the best possible outcome he could have hoped for.

“Yeah, okay,” he says, and grabs the spare controller.

–

Cole’s dad opens the door not ten seconds after he rings the bell, which suggests he’d been waiting by the door for Cole to show up, which is either quite sweet or a bit weird, he can’t decide.

“Cole!” he says, opening it, and then his eyes widen. “Oh!”

Cole grins, gesturing to the other three ninja, who have promised to be on their best behaviour and are dressed in their nicest outfits. “Surprise?” he says, and they beam at his dad. Lou looks utterly thrilled, clapping his hands together and grinning.

“Oh, this is wonderful! Cole never brings friends home,” he says, and Cole’s face goes a bit hot. He looks around at the other ninja, who smile at him encouragingly.

“It’s actually, uh. Boyfriends, dad.”

Lou’s face shifts through surprise, to joy, to smug understanding. He smiles at Cole, who rolls his eyes.

“Boyfriends, eh?” he says, raising his eyebrows. “Who knew?”

“Lay off it, dad,” says Cole. “Can we come in or not?”

Lou steps back to let them all pass through, waving them in with pleasantries and greetings, and when Cole passes him he pats him on the shoulder and smiles, his eyes gentle and proud. Cole smiles back, embarrassed. He’s still a little bit mad that his dad figured things out before he did, but honestly? He can’t be that upset, what with the way it all worked out.

Okay, maybe a little. But only because his dad is being so smug about it. Otherwise, he’s completely fine. After all, he’s dating the three best people in Ninjago, so what’s he got to be mad about?

Cole grins as he walks into the living room to find Kai and Jay mid-bicker already, with Zane attempting to act as mediator. They stop when they see him, all three sets of eyes lighting up, and his grin grows wider. Yeah. He’s doing pretty good.

#grays fic stuff #ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago fic #i dont rly know how to post fic on tumblr aha #hope this is good #polyninja #cole brookstone #lou brookstone #kai smith #kai jiang #jay walker #zane julien #nya smith #nya jiang #fics

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g3z0 · 3 months

Text

Scared to love P6

Summary: You and Nick are best friends since childhood days. He doesn’t know that you like guys, let alone that you like him. You try to ignore your feelings, also because of your homophobic family. But it’s harder than you thought.

Warnings: smoking, cursing, corny fluff, physical violence, mentions of losing a loved one, mention of overdose, abusive household

-g3z0

I heard someone climbing up the tree house behind me.

„owh, fuck.“ I hear Nick mumble and after a few seconds I can feel his footsteps on the wood.

He sits down next to me and I just stare straight forward into the woods, taking a long drag from my cigarette.

I have a few spots I come to when I want to shut the world out. The tree house is one of them. Matt, Chris, Nick and me build it when we were like 7 and their dad helped us.

„y/n“ nick says softly and I can feel his eyes on me.

I exhale the smoke and swallow a little, looking down at my lap. „Hm?“ I mumble and I take another drag.

He’s silent for a few seconds before he sighs a little „why didn’t you answer my texts or calls?“

I shrug with my shoulders a little „busy.“ I say bluntly as I take the last drag of my cigarette, flicking it away.

„yeah, busy.“ he mocks me „with what exactly? You weren’t at school, you weren’t home, so busy with what?“

I clench my jaw a little and take a deep breathe „nick, let it go.“ I mumble as I look back into the woods.

„no, I’m not fucking letting it go. Y/n talk to me, tell me what’s wrong, please.“ he sounds almost desperate.

That’s one thing I don’t like about Nick. He cares about me. That makes the whole thing so much worse. I wish he would hate me so my feelings would go away. I wish I wouldn’t feel like this and he would just be a best friend to me. - nothing more.

„Y/n, look at me..“ he says softly as I feel his hand on my cheek, turning my head gently so I look at him.

My eyes meet his blue ones and he cups my cheek with both hands.

I close my eyes for a moment and lean against his touch, letting out a small sigh.

„don’t shut me out“ he whispers and licks his lips a little, causing me to take a glance at them „anyone but me..“

I look back into his eyes and nod a little. „Im sorry..“ I whisper and he shakes his head softly.

„no- no, don’t be sorry y/n..“ he says softly and he wraps his arms around me.

I lean my head onto his shoulder, my cheek pressing against it and I wrap my arms back around him.

My heart starts to beat faster. I shouldn’t feel like this. I shouldn’t want to kiss him - want to touch him. But I still want to.

„y/n?“ he whispers.

„yeah?“ I whisper back.

„…your heart is beating really fast..“ he mumbles but he doesn’t let go off me or move.

I swallow a little and don’t move away either. „I know..“

He looks at me and I look back at him.

Our faces are just inches away and it feels like my heart will beat out of my chest.

I want to kiss him so bad. I could if I just moved a little forward. That would change everything - I can’t risk that. I can’t risk to loose my best friend and-

„you kissed me at the party.“ he whispers

What?

I let go off him and lean back, staring at him with wide eyes.

Fuck, I did what? I’m so mad at myself. So fucking mad. How could I be so stupid and drink so much that I kissed him? How could I be so stupid and drink so much that I don’t even remember how his lips feel against mine?

„Nick-" I breathe but he stops me.

„no, it’s okay.“ he nods a little and looks to the side while he shrugs with his shoulders.

„you were drunk, you can’t even remember it. It-.. It was a stupid mistake you made..“ he continues.

I feel my heart clenching. It was a mistake. But not the kind of mistake he thinks it is. I don’t regret kissing him. I regret that I can’t remember it and that I risked our friendship by it.

I just stare at him. Thousand thoughts in my head all at once.

How does he even feel about the kiss?

He looks back at me. „I didn’t tell anyone and I’m not planning to do. I know you‘re not gay or something. You were dru-" He gets cut off by my lips pressing against his.

My heart is beating so fast, I might throw up.

He freezes for a moment before I can feel how his lips move against mine.

Oh my god, I should’ve done this so much sooner.

I lay my hand on the side of his face, stroking his cheek gently with my thumb.

He breaks the kiss by leaning back. His lips slightly parted as he lets out a breathe. It makes me want to lean directly forward again and to feel his lips again.

I swallow and look into his eyes. „I really like you Nick..“ I whisper.

And that’s it.

I expect everything. I expect him to slap me, to push me away, to say how he hates me - how I ruined the friendship.

But he just smiles softly and leans in again, our lips touching again.

I didn’t expect that. But I’m not complaining.

Our lips move against each others in a soft and gentle way.

Im kinda embarrassed that this is my first kiss.

Not my first actually, but I can’t remember the one at the party so it doesn’t count.

We both pull away after a few seconds and look into each others eyes.

„you‘re a fucking idiot..“ he whispers with a smile across his face.

I laugh a little and lean my forehead against his, closing my eyes. „Shut up..“

I flinch as someone bangs loudly at my door, causing me to wake up.

„y/n, get your fucking ass up and unlock the door!“ I hear my dads voice yelling.

I let out a tired groan and roll to my side, rubbing my eyes with my fingers.

It was a dream - of course it was.

„y/n!“ my dad yells on the other side of the door.

„im coming, give me 5 fucking minutes!“ I yell back and rub my face with my hands.

I hear him scoff and hear his footsteps walking away from my door.

I let out a sigh and tap on my phone.

11:41

73 messages from „Nick“

49 missed calls from „Nick“

4 messages from „Chris“

1 messages from „Matt“

Fuck.

It’s the fourth day im skipping school. Fourth day of ignoring my friends.

I yawn a little and slowly get up, grabbing some clothes that lay on my floor and putting them on.

I unlock my door and walk into my bathroom.

My eyes dart over my face in the reflection of the mirror.

God, I look like shit.

Dark bags under my eyes, an tired and annoyed expression and my hair is a complete mess.

I brush my teeth and think about the dream.

Weird how my brain makes up I kissed Nick at the party.

So weird.

I walk out of my bathroom once I’m done brushing my teeth and walk into the kitchen.

My dad is sitting at the table, a beer bottle in his hands. He glares at me and watches every move I make.

It’s almost 12 pm and he’s already drinking since the fuck I know.

I grab a glass of the shelve and fill it up with tap water.

„your school called.“ he says sternly.

I roll my eyes a little and I bring the glass up to my mouth to drink but he slaps my hand away and the glass falls and breaks onto the ground.

„don’t you fucking dare, rolling your eyes at me.“ he snaps at me and I just glare at him.

Numb.

„what are you doing with skipping school, hm? Taking drugs? Fucking little fags?“ he scoffs.

I shake my head a little and try to walk past him but he grabs my arm roughly.

„you‘re not going anywhere.“

I sigh a little and look at him, hoping I’ll get this over myself quickly.

„Your mother wou-"

„don’t talk about her.“ I say through gritted teeth while I feel my whole body tense up.

Anger.

He lets out a sarcastic laugh as he grabs my hair, pulling my head back.

„I talk about my wife when I fucking want to. You‘re the reason she’s dead.“ he spits at me.

I push him away as hard as I can and he stumbles against the counter.

Im so happy that lily is in school right now.

„you pumped her full with drugs! Not me!“ I yell at him.

He clenches his jaw and grabs me by the collar, pushing me against the wall.

„you won’t talk to me like that.“ he yells at me as I feel the first punch in my stomach.

I can’t breathe for a second and let out a sharp breathe, leaning slightly forward.

He presses me more against the wall and I feel the second punch.

I cough a little and clench my jaw hard. Pain spreads through my whole body and he grabs me by my hair, pulling it back, causing me to look back at him.

He breathes heavily and so do I.

I lick my lips a little and let out a little laugh „it’s your fucking fault.“ I mumble as I spit into his face.

I know I basically signed my death contract with it but I don’t even care anymore.

A few hours later my whole body hurts.

It hurts to even move.

I hear the door bell ring but I ignore it, staring up at the ceiling of my room while I lay in my bed.

My dad left after he beat me to the ground.

I take a long drag from my joint and hold the smoke a little in my lungs before I exhale the smoke.

It kinda helps with the pain. Only a little but it helps.

The door bell rings again and I let out a sigh.

Why cant everyone just piss the fuck off.

I bring the joint back to my mouth when the door bell rings for the third time and I clench my jaw annoyed.

I slowly sit up, breathing in sharply because of the pain.

I lay the joint down in my ashtray and stand slowly up, walking towards the front door.

With every step I take, the pain gets worse.

My head feels like it’s throbbing and I close my eyes for a second, trying to gain control over my body.

I let out a shaky sigh and the door bell rings for the fucking fourth time.

I bite down on my cheek, trying to calm down.

I grab the door handle and tear the door open.

„what?“ I ask annoyed but I freeze. A pair of blue eyes meet mine.

„what the fuck?“ nicks says while he frowns at me.

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nick sturniolo x reader #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo triplets x reader #nick sturniolo x you

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ssprayberrythings · 1 year

Text

Christmas Through The Years - Part One

The Start

‘Jake “Hangman” Seresin x female!reader’

Huge thanks to @fandomxpreferences for taking the time to read this over before I posted it!! <3

Approx. 1.6k words

Warnings: none, it’s all fluff. I’m a hopeless romantic I couldn’t help it !!

—

Meeting Jake Seresin came so unexpectedly but it’s not something I’d change for the world. When we met it was at the Hard Deck, I had been dragged out by some friends for a girl’ night. As we got to the bar, I told the group I’d get the first round despite the reluctance to actually go out. Regardless it was why I found myself at the bar waiting to put my order through for drinks. He came over to get a refill and right as our eyes met, there was just an instant connection that neither of us could really explain, we just knew we wanted to see where it could take us. Him being his usual flirty self, turned his body and after we got past the flirty introductions and pick up lines from Jake, we kept the conversation going. We didn't even realize that we both had our drinks, and exchanged numbers. By the end of the night I had two 2 messages from an unknown number

“Hey. It’s Jake”

“Send me your address, Im taking you on a date tomorrow. Dress comfy!”

Fast forward a couple of weeks, now into December and it was going great with Jake. We went on a couple more dates, got to know each other better, and had a couple lazy days together when our schedules were in sync. Overall, everything was going in the right direction.

To anyone else it would look as if we were a committed couple and even to us it felt that way. However we still hadn't had the talk of ‘what we were’ and so doubts about whether this was real lingered in the back of my mind. Last Friday I found myself sitting at home, ordering some last minute gifts for my family when there was a knock on my door. I put my laptop down and got up from my spot in the corner of my living room to walk toward the door. I opened it and saw Jake there.

“Hi, I thought you didn't finish work till later?” I ask as I step aside to let him in. “Mav let us leave earlier because its Friday. Plus I think he had plans of his own to get to.” he chuckled as he took his boots off. He turned to me, took a few steps forward and wrapped his arms around my waist before leaning down and giving my lips a sweet kiss that brought a smile to my face. “Well I am thankful for Mav and his Friday plans.” I tell him as we pull away and Jake chuckles.

I take his hand to lead him back to my spot on my couch and we sit down next to each other, getting comfy. “Did you have a good day?” he asked as I scooted closer, putting my legs over his lap as he put his arm across the back of the couch “Yeah, I went to the gym this morning, picked up some groceries while I was out, then came home and cleaned up a bit. I just now finished my Christmas shopping.” I told him, smiling as he listened to me ramble on.

That was one thing about Jake Seresin. Although he had a hard time keeping his mouth shut with everyone else, when it came to you, he could listen to your voice all day and never get tired of it. “Sounds like quite the productive day” he responded playing with a stray hair that had fallen from my messy bun. “I wanted to ask you something actually now that you bring up Christmas. Would you be interested in coming to a Christmas party Mav and Penny are having at the Hard Deck?” he offers with a certain glee in his eyes.

“Of course, I would love to! When is it?” I ask. “It’s December 23rd. So next Thursday.'' he answers my question, unable to hide the grin on his face knowing he’ll get to introduce his girl to everyone. “Sounds good, can't wait!” I told him, genuinely excited.

The rest of the night was spent talking about the holidays, sharing stories on how we spent the holidays growing up, and what our favourite traditions were. We continued the Christmas conversation as we made dinner together, laughing with one another at certain points in our stories and then ended the night cuddling on the couch watching Home Alone.

The week seemed to fly by and now I’m standing in front of my mirror observing the finished look for the Christmas party. I had gone out the day prior and bought the outfit I was wearing. I paired black leather pants that stopped right before my ankles with simple black heels and a dark red long sleeve bodysuit that showed off my shoulders. It contrasted perfectly with the gold jewelry I chose.

As I was touching up my lipgloss, there was a knock at my door indicating Jake was here. I opened the door and took a second to admire the man standing in front of me. He was wearing black dress pants and a deep maroon button up with the first couple buttons undone. His hair was still visibly wet from the shower he had taken and he opted out of styling it with his usual hair gel. It made him look even better than he normally did, which I didn't think was possible.

“You like what you see?” he smirked, pulling me out of checking him out. I just blushed in response and turned to get my jacket while he chuckled. He loved making me blush.

—

Jake was a gentleman through and through. When we arrived at the Hard Deck, he put the car in park and opened the door for me like usual. “Thank you.” I smiled as he shut the door. “Anything for my girl.” He winked while offering his arm and we walked to the entrance of the Hard Deck.

Once inside I saw the decorations Penny had put up and smiled. There was a tree in the corner and everything looked so beautiful. Jake led us towards the dagger squad who were all dressed just as nice as you and Jake were.

“Ayyye! Hangman joins us.” Coyote said once we were close, and Jake just chuckled at his friend. “Hangman, who's the pretty lady on your arm?” Rooster asked with a smirk. He was already 2 drinks in so his usual flirtiness was turned up a few notches

“Back off Bradshaw, she's here with me.” Jake said slightly possessive but not meaning anything rude by it. Rooster just put his hands up and chuckled. Jake introduced me to the rest of the group, and everyone took a liking to me almost immediately.

Throughout the night I got separated from Jake but I didn't mind, settling into a conversation with Natasha. She’s grateful not to be the only girl in the group anymore.“So how long have you and Hang-” she started but then stopped herself. “Jake, I mean. How long have you and Jake been dating?” she finished her question, and I made a face while chuckling.

“Well we aren't official yet.” I told her, taking a sip of the drink Jake had gotten me earlier. “Wait seriously?” she questioned, shocked you guys weren't official. “I’ve never seen him so head over heels before. There’s no way you're not his girlfriend.” she continued and I just shrugged.

“I mean I want us to be official, but I also don't know how to bring it up to him.” I shared with the fellow female, hoping for some guidance. “I would say just be upfront with him and ask him.” she advised. Before I could reply to her, Jake came over. “Sorry Phoenix, but I’m stealing my girl back.” he told her as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder and walked me to the other side of the room.

He stopped right in the hallway that led to the washrooms. “Is everything okay?” I had to ask, and he just smirked while darting his eyes above the two of us. I followed his eyes, and of course there was mistletoe hanging. I looked back at Jake and he was already looking at me.

I knew I had to ask him now or else I never would, which wasn't an option. As Jake started leaning in, I put a hand on his chest to stop him. “Jake, wait” I said, seeing the confusion in his eyes before continuing.

“I know this is about to sound extremely middle school-like but I have to ask you. What are we?” I asked, looking at him, and he still seemed confused by my question “I mean, are we boyfriend and girlfriend?” I asked more directly. He chuckled in response and now it was my turn to be confused.

“Babe what did you think we'd been doing this whole time if we weren't boyfriend and girlfriend?” he asked as he pulled me a bit closer. “I know we never said it officially, but I thought it was just an unspoken thing.” he told me smiling.

I didn’t know what to say to that and as I tried to think of something to say, he continued speaking. “I'm sorry I just assumed, I should've asked you earlier.” He apologizes. “ Will you officially be my girlfriend?” he asked, looking at me with pure adoration as he moved a strand of hair behind my ear.

I looked in his eyes and knew he was being sincere when he asked. Afraid to speak, I just nodded as a small smile made its way to my face. He smiled and leaned down, this time not being stopped by my hand and we shared our first “official” kiss as boyfriend and girlfriend under the mistletoe.

“You know I’ve never been kissed under the mistletoe before now” I told him as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Jake just smiled and leant down to kiss me again. This was something he could get used to doing.

—

Okay this is my first ever published piece of writing for a fictional character which is why I really hope this is good so please leave any comments you have!! I’m excited to share this series with everyone and will definitely work quickly to get the others out !!

#top gun maverick #hangman x reader #jake seresin series #jake seresin x reader #glen powell #top gun maverick x reader #jake seresin #jake seresin imagine #bradley rooster bradshaw #miles teller #natasha trace #topgun #Christmas Through The Years x ssprayberrythings

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heartfullofleeches · 1 year

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OMG OMG OMG IM IN LOVE WITH ELOISE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE CAN WE GET SOME MORE OF THEM?????

Tw: blood, very brief mention of gore

Coming home after a busy day, you return home to an unlocked door. Fear sinks into your heart over the uncertainty on whether you locked it this morning or not - though you clearly remember doing so. You thing to call the police, but it'd be a waste of time if you were really overthinking things. Hope whatever danger was gone, or that there was none at all, you enter your not as humble abode.

From your first step in alone, you can see the aftermath of the carnage taken place in your home. Dark splatters across the walls. Chairs and other furniture knocked all over the place. It seems that whoever was there had attempted to clean up as tape had been applied to a broken window, and the glass from it breaking had been cleaned up as well as other small fixes. There's also something else on the floor - what appears to be white feathers.

Despite logic telling you to flee, you venture further into the house. A chemical smell wafts into the air as you near the ajar bathroom door; light coming from its crack. It is then when you hear the faint sound of grunt, followed by a soft squishing. Peeking through, you see the walls of the bathroom completely drenched in red and a figure hunched before it; more feathers scattered over the ground below. Stepping back, you knock over an overturned bottle hanging over the nearby table; the sound alerting the figure to your presence. It looks as you with beady, white eyes.

You turn to fully commence your retreat; tripping over the bottle in the process and crashing to the floor. In the few seconds it takes for you to turn back over and sit up, the bathroom door bursts open and the intruder barrels out. You brace yourself for what's to come, but there's nothing - except for the gentle fall of a feather into your lap.

"Good Evening!"

You look up; nearly blinded by the sight before you. A stranger hovers over you; donned in a white coat that reached their heels and wearing the face of a cherub. They pull of the mask; sporting a broad smile almost as bright as the light around them. A ring of white surrounds both their irises and the top of their head; two large wings protruding from spine. And angel; in some since of the word. Basked in a heavenly glow, and the fruit of their crimes. They stop the blood hand saw with a laugh, lowering back to the ground.

"Pardon me! I have no idea where that silly thing came from. My name is Eloise, but you may call me Angel because that's what I am! Your loyal, faithful guardian sent from above to watch over you and help you in your darkest hour. Just like I have this evening!"

The stranger zips closer to you; grasps your hands and holding them tight.

"I've watched you from afar for some long- but now that we've met I simply can't part from your physical side. Please say you'll allow me to stay. If I have your care, I can become an even better angel. Knowing you're safe and will accept me helps me become more powerful. I can already feel myself growing stronger now, see?"

They lean their right shoulder forward, the reach of their wings growing further out. From their gaps, you can see into the bathroom; the socket of a pealed away skull staring back at you from the tub of gore. Eloise quickly spreads them out more; giggling the night away.

"As you can see, my wings have grown and inch or two. It's just the start of what we can do together. Please, please say you'll allow me to stay. I'm not sure what's happen to me if you say no."

#Eloise my oc #yandere angel #yandere #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #yandere headcanons #yandere x you #yandere insert #yandere blurb #yandere x reader #yandere oc #yandere drabble #yandere x y/n #yandere x darling #tw yandere #yandere writing

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witchersmistress · 11 months

Text

The Basement part 2

Hello my lovies!! Part 2 of the basement scene, this is part three for rainstorms and hate sex, im know there will be a few unanswered questions.

as per my usual. i do not give permission to copy my work or use my work in anyway without permission. so help me if you do, i will haunt you for the rest of your days.

Trigger Warnings: Clausterphobia, small spaces, foul language, 18+ highly reccomended.

Word count: 6.4K

Fuck. My phone’s battery is about one percent. Still, it’s better than the alternative. I tense as I step past Baron, sure he’s going to grab me. He lets me pass, but Duke reaches out and pinches my tit. Okay, talking shit is one thing, and his rape jokes are bad enough, but now he laid a hand on me. “Oh, you want to get physical?” I ask, my hands balling into fists. “Yeah,” he says with a sloppy grin. “That’s right, baby. Let me taste that sweet cherry pie.” I swing, and he doesn’t even duck. It’s a beautiful right hook that meets his temple with the aim of a fucking archer. He crumples to the floor in a heap, and I jump back, fists raised and adrenaline pumping through me, ready for Baron to come at me.

“You gonna come get yours?” I ask. He just shakes his head. “I’ve felt your fists. Besides, I’m more into the challenge than taking what I can by brute force.” I didn't trust him for a second, so I went back into the next room. It’s dark in there, since this is the only flashlight. I swallow hard, wiping my hands on my jeans, and feel my way to the dirt tunnel. It’s chilly in the basement, and my clothes are still damp from the rain. At least, I tell myself that’s why I start shivering the second my shins are on the cold dirt floor of the tunnel. I force myself onwards, my heart thudding in my ears. To avoid thinking about the ceiling collapsing, I focus on the tunnel behind me, trying to hear if Baron’s coming in with me. Each scrape of my own knees on the floor makes me tremble. God, it’s so tight. My shoulders are pressed against the walls, and I wonder if maybe this tunnel doesn’t lead out at all. Maybe it leads to… Nothing.

I’ll be stuck in a dead end in the dark, waiting for Duke to come rape me and probably kill me. Because fuck if I’m just going to lie there and take it without fighting back. I’ve seen way too many movies where people go into a cave or a tunnel looking for escape and instead come upon a pile of skeletons left by all the other idiots who tried to escape before them. The ceiling of the tunnel brushes my back—or was it a bat?—and I think I’m going to be sick. I close my eyes and try to breathe, though it feels like there’s no oxygen in the tunnel. What the fuck am I doing? I’ve just basically buried myself alive. I press my palms to the cold dirt under them and think about the nights I spent locked in the closet at home. The hours I’d be in there, sometimes so long I wet myself before Mom dragged her hungover ass up and remembered where I was.

Then she’d rage at me and smack me around a little and tell me to clean myself up, that I was a disgusting pig. Or if she had a boyfriend over, she’d howl with laughter at my wet pants because she didn’t want men to see her pissed. A sense of humor is sexy, after all. No one likes an angry woman. I take another ragged breath, forcing it into the constricted airways to my panicked lungs. This is not that bad. And if I could clean up myself and the closet without crying back then, I sure as fuck won’t cry now. I didn’t freak out then, and I won’t freak out now. Once, she locked me in a cabinet because she said I’d lose my claustrophobia if I just faced it. I was curled up in a ball, with my knees to my chest, for hours. I have all the room in the world here. I could lie down flat and crawl on my stomach. I can roll over. I can move. I start forward again. After a time, I hear echoing scuffles high above. I reach up a tentative hand and can’t feel the ceiling. I climb to my knees, then my feet. Relief floods through me in a rush that brings tears to my eyes and a whoop of relief to my throat. Blinking back the wetness, I hold a hand in front of me and one on the wall, and I walk until the wall falls away. I turned on my phone for the last time. No skeletons. No cage with Mabel Darling being held captive like Gretel waiting for the witch to eat her. There are two tunnels off the side of a cavernous room. I continue straight ahead, and at the far side of the room, I find a door, just like Baron said. Heart galloping in my chest, I find the knob and twist. It doesn’t budge.

Fuck. I sink down on the floor, shaking with spent energy, the adrenaline leaving my limbs. My fingers are trembling and stiff with cold, but I try to pick the lock for a while, anyway. When I can’t, I consider sleeping here. At least I’m away from the guys. But it’s so fucking cold, and I’m shivering so hard I can’t possibly relax. My phone dies, and suddenly, the darkness seems close and oppressive and terrifying. Even though I wasn’t using the light, there was comfort in knowing it was an option if I needed it. Now, a drunk obnoxious Duke seems preferable to staying here alone, not knowing if someone will come through the door and who it might be. But going back to the twins means facing the tunnel again. I did it before, though. I can do it again. I know there are no forks until the tunnel opens up, which means I just have to find the tunnel in the dark and hope it’s the right one. It’s not too hard. I just have to go straight ahead. I gather all my courage and creep across the room in the dark. When I find the tunnel, I take a deep breath and barrel in. I don’t think, just charge through as fast as I can. Somehow, it doesn’t seem so bad on the way back. When I finally see a scant light ahead, my heart starts racing with relief. I burst out of the tunnel into the dirt room in the basement of the CIA office. The familiarity itself is a relief, and I can finally breathe easy. Duke is sitting up in a chair, a beer in one hand, his eyes unfocused and his jaw slack. A lump has already formed where I decked him. Baron sits on the stone slab, his phone sitting beside him with the light on.

“How was it?” he asks, holding up his beer. “Fuck you,” I say. “You knew it was locked.” “Faced your fears, though, didn’t you? One more Midnight Swan challenge down.” “Is that what this is?” I ask. “My initiation?” “Depends,” he says. “It could be.” “Bullshit. August said I could never join.” “August’s not the only Swan,” Baron counters. “He’s your leader.” “He’ll be done with you after tonight, and then he won’t care what happens to you. That’s how it works with him. When he’s done, you don’t exist to him anymore.” “Fine,” I say, planting my hands on my hips. “What do I need to do next?” “You tell me, Stalker Girl.” “Betray a friend for a Swan. See, that one might be hard, since I don’t have friends.” “Gloria’s a friend,” he says. “I’m a friend.”

“Are you, though?” He holds out a beer, the cap still on. “Have a beer. Relax. We’ll be here a while.” “I like to stay sharp.” “Me too,” he says, taking a drink from his beer. “But one beer won’t hurt.” I relent and take it. At least it might warm me up a little, and to be honest, I need to calm down and think this through. Like when they threw me in the dumpster with Colt, I’m attacking a big problem with a tiny knife. If I chill and wait it out, someone will come open the door. If this is some kind of hazing for the Midnight Swans, then I need to see what they want me to do. So, I sat down on the stone slab next to Baron. “What’s the last challenge?” I ask. “The gauntlet.” “For a girl?” he asks. “That means we sex you in.” I force myself to swallow my beer without reaction. “Who does?” “All of us.” I squeeze the cold bottle to keep my hands from shaking. “All the Swans?” “A gangbang, baby,” Duke slurs, holding up his beer. “And this has happened before?” I ask.

“No,” Baron says. “Because no chicks at this office would do it. But I bet you would.” “You bet wrong.” “Well, technically, the gauntlet only requires the participation of three Swans,” he says. “And you’ve already fucked August. So you're a third of the way there.” “This is your chance,” Duke says. “Three for three.” He leans forward in his chair, then tilts slowly until he topples out, as if in slow motion. It would be comical, but I’m a little worried he’s going to choke on his puke and die in his sleep. “He’s not wrong,” Baron says. Duke rolls onto his back on the floor. “Gonna rest my eyes,” he mumbles. “Then we’ll tag team her.” “My phone died,” I say after a minute, nodding at Baron’s light. “Want to call someone to let us out?” “No can do,” he says, taking a drink. “No service down here.” “Right.” We sip our beers in silence for a few minutes. Then Baron climbs off the rock and sits on the floor beside Duke. “My phone’s going to die if I don’t turn off the light,” he says. “We should all just get some sleep.”

“Why don’t I trust you in the dark?” “Because you’re paranoid and think everyone wants to fuck you.” “Says the guy who was just trying to get in my pants.” “That was me,” Duke says, not opening his eyes. “Come sit by us,” Baron says. “It’ll be warmer. I won’t mess with you.” “Fine,” I say, sliding off the stone and going to sit by them. Despite Duke’s usual drunken asshole behavior, they haven’t done anything. Baron’s right. They are my friends. We’ve been hanging out for a few months now. I sit with them every day at lunch, go to their games, and am part of their circle. It’s not like it was at the beginning of the year, before I was a Walker's girl. I’m under August’s protection now. They might want him to be done with me, might try to convince me it’s true. But I know different things, and they know it, too. He didn’t lock us down here. Baron did. Baron has the key. He wants August to dump me, but he won’t risk his brother’s rage by touching his plaything before August gives the okay. Baron turns off his light, and we both lie down. He turns toward me, and I tense, but he only lays an arm across me. “So, not into being a Swan if it means you have to work for it?” “Would you let three dudes fuck you to get in?” “Touché.”

For a while, none of us spoke. After a while, Baron sighs. “You know, this is where they kept August when he was kidnapped,” he says drowsily. A chill explodes over my skin, and I lose my breath for a second. “What?” “Not in the main room,” Baron says, petting my hair absently. “Back here, in the dirt like an animal.” “And he still comes down here?” I ask, remembering that weird encounter in the dark, when he brought me down here and started kissing me and said all those creepy things… It’s safe here, in the dark. It doesn’t hurt anymore. Suddenly, I’m dizzy with the realization of how sick this all is—him forcing girls down here to blow him, those things he said that probably some sicko said to him… “Are you kidding?” Duke asks. “Our brother’s not afraid of anything.”

I can hear the pride in his voice, and it’s sweet how much he thinks of his big brother. But it doesn’t change how fucked up this is. Maybe it was him that locked me in here with his brothers, knowing what they might do to me. “He’s the one who wanted to keep the Swans going after the office and the police shut them down,” Baron says. “He wanted to come down here when we all thought it was a bad idea. But he wanted to keep the meetings here.” “Why?” I ask, too terrified to even think about it.

“Probably to show how little it affects him,” Baron says. “To show the Darlings they didn’t win.” I’m not convinced. If anything, it shows me how much it still affects him. He can’t let it go, just like he can’t stop going to the bridge, where I’m pretty sure his sister died. Instead of avoiding everything, he revels in the pain of it like a masochist, never letting himself forget. He’s punishing himself, though I can’t begin to imagine what he thinks he did wrong in either instance. “He’s not going to let that shit own him,” Duke says. “He rules his past.” “Can I ask you something?” I say after a minute. “When he was kidnapped… Was he assaulted?” “Yeah,” Baron says. “They beat the fuck out of him. Like, half his teeth are implants. He had a concussion, but he wanted to go right back out on the field.” He sounds so proud, like that makes his brother a hero. My ribs ache at the thought of August needing to prove himself that badly. “Dad had to find a doctor who would sign off for him to play,” Duke says, laughing and then hiccupping. “He was so pissed the first one wouldn’t. I think he got him fired. Then he found a good one.” “Now they golf together,” Baron says with a chuckle. “You never know when you’ll need a medical professional. Helps to have all kinds in your pocket.”

A shiver rolls through me. I wonder how much of that fight was August’s, and how much was Mr. Dolce’s. This is how they took power. Paying off people to do what they want, bulldozing those who wouldn’t. Nothing stands in their way—like a father, like sons. Despite August’s resentment, they’re all on the same side, all in it together. August is eighteen. He doesn’t have to obey his father or even live there. He could stop going to Hockington if he wanted, but something keeps him going back. Is it the same thing that keeps him coming back here, some kind of penance? I clear my throat. “I meant, like, sexually assaulted.” “Dude, that’s fucked up,” Duke slurs. “August’s a man.” “Men get raped, too.” “August would never take it up the ass,” Baron says. “You really are sick, Jailbird” “Yeah,” Duke chimes in. “How could you ask that about a guy who’s fucking you? Does he seem gay to you?” “The ignorance of that statement is honestly astounding.” “Nothing like that happened,” Baron says flatly. “Old Man Darling brought him here, and he was beaten to within an inch of his life, had half his teeth knocked out, his skull fractured, ribs broken, shoulder dislocated… He

was starved and dehydrated and all kinds of shit. But don’t even think about anything perverted like that.” “Because none of that’s perverted,” I mutter. “Where’s my beer?” Duke asks. “Did they catch the guy?” I ask. “Sort of,” Baron says. “That whole investigation was botched from the start, though. The redneck cops around here don’t know how to deal with real problems.” Or maybe the problems weren’t as real as Baron thinks. Dixie told me that their own sister sent some letter saying it was all faked. But August couldn’t have faked that, could he? I mean, I guess he could have let someone beat him up and then say it was the Darlings, but damn. Those are some extreme lengths to go to just to frame someone. But then, August’s nothing if not extreme. And Dixie could be wrong. Maybe there was no letter, and if there was, maybe it wasn’t from Crystal at all but from a Darling trying to get the charges dropped. And here I am, helping them. “You found him here?” I ask, rubbing my arms, trying to get the goosebumps to go away.

“Has anyone seen my beer?” Duke asks, groping at me until I slap his hand away. His voice is slurred and sleepy, though, and I know we’re about to lose him for the night. “No one found him here,” Baron says. “Devlin’s dad put him in their attic to hide him until he died. But they found him before he did.” “Who found him?” “Crystal and Devlin.” I shudder harder. All I’ve ever heard from Colt and Dixie and even August is how great Crystal was—that everyone loved her, wanted her. She taught them so much. She was such a good, selfless person. But I haven’t heard this part. “After his dad tried to kill August, she still chose Devlin over him?” I ask. “Yeah,” Baron says. “August called her on it, too. He’s blunt as fuck. He thinks he did something wrong because of it, but she needed to hear it. And August’s never been afraid to hit those hard truths, y’know? He’ll say what everyone’s thinking, do the hard shit that no one else wants to do. He doesn’t let anything stand in his way. He gets shit done.” I can practically hear Baron and Duke both swelling with pride every time they talk about August. It’s clear they worship him. But that doesn’t mean they always agree with August. This is the first time I’ve heard anyone paint Crystal as anything less than a saint. I want to hear more, but I’m too fucking cold to ignore it. “Any chance someone left a jacket down here?” I ask. “Or a dry change of clothes?” Baron’s hand finds mine in the dark. “Damn, you are cold,” he says, sitting up. He moves around, and a second later, his warm hoodie envelopes me in its cozy fabric and the scent of him, like boys and faint cologne or deodorant. I pull it down over me and huddle into it with such gratitude I might be tempted to fuck him again if he asked. “Come here and put your head on me, and I’ll tell you both a bedtime story,” Baron says. “I’ve got an extra sucker you can eat while you listen. This is a little tale I like to call, The Fall of the Darlings. Don’t worry. It has a happy ending.”

I adjust my position so I’m lying perpendicular to Baron so I can rest my head on his stomach. It’s better than the cold floor. “Are you going to tell me about how August called your sister on choosing the Darlings over him, and she went ahead with it, anyway?” “Fucked up, right?” I can’t help but agree with him. Who would choose anyone over August? But then, that’s not fair. I’m just learning how crazy love makes a person. Who’s to say I wouldn’t sell out my own family for August? “Did his dad go to jail?” I ask, thinking of Mr. D, who wanted to live vicariously through my sex stories. No conjugal visits, apparently. “For a few months,” Baron says, pressing a sucker into my hand. “They charged him with conspiracy or intent or something along those lines. But his lawyer got him off. The legal system here is even more fucked up than New York. But we got justice.” I unwrap the sucker slowly in the dark. “You killed him?” “Nah,” Baron says. “August doesn’t believe in murder. He says death is easy. Life is suffering.” “So, he’s like an angry Buddha?” Baron chuckles. “Sure. If you die, your suffering ends. If you live, you can suffer for a long time.” “And you made him suffer?” “The whole family,” Baron says proudly.

“While Devlin’s dad was in jail, we made his mom play with us. That lasted a couple months, until she checked herself into Cedar Crest.” Even though people like me could never afford Cedar Crest, of course I’ve heard about the treatment facility. It’s one of the few local claims to fame, since celebrities hole up there for treatment on occasion. It’s basically a resort, or a psych hospital for the rich and famous. “Is she still there?” I ask, suddenly wondering if Mr. D is a man at all. “Nah, when Devlin’s dad got out of jail, he took her out and they moved away. Never even came back to see if they could salvage anything from the fire.” “That’s the house next door?” I ask. “Devlin’s house?” “Yep,” he says. “Such a tragedy it was lost in a fire.” I roll my eyes in the dark. “I’m sure you had nothing to do with that.” “Would we do something like that?” he asks, his tone filled with mock innocence. “You don’t know where he went?” “We know,” he says. “But they were gone from Faulkner, so we moved on. You know what was really fun, Harper?

Seeing their empire crumble as we dismantled it brick by brick.” “Has anyone ever told you that you’re a sociopath?” “Aw, now, you like watching people, too, don’t you, Harper? Always nosing around our business, digging into August’s life. Trying to get him wrapped around your little finger. We’re not so different, you and me.” I shrug my shoulders against his side. “Maybe you’re right.” I’m not so sure, though. I don’t glory in people’s downfall. Or maybe I do. Before August meant something to me, I vowed to take them down. Not to take their throne, but just for the joy of watching them fall. Maybe I’m exactly like Baron, I just don’t hate the Walkers anymore. When they were my enemies, I wanted to watch them burn.

After a minute of sucking on our candy in silence, Baron shifts around to get comfortable and then goes on. “The grandfather Darling, John, had seven sons. All started with J. So we went through them all. After Devlin’s dad, Justin, there’s Joseph—Preston’s dad—and Jacob. That’s Colt and Mabel’s dad. Joseph went to prison for murder. That guy was definitely involved in August’s kidnapping. Get this. He’s such a dick that even Preston refused to be a character witness at his trial.” That’s the Darling I suspect is Mr. D. The one I’ve been feeding information to. I’ve thought of him as a friend before, but I know that’s an illusion created by my own lack. He’s not a friend. He’s a guy so evil his own son wouldn’t stand up for him. And I’ve been giving him information about a boy I love. It makes me feel sick and dirty in a way even his creepy sexual interest never has. Baron goes on when I don’t answer. “We fucked with Lindsey a little, but she was too easy, and then Preston threatened Gloria, so we moved on to Colt’s family. We had some fun with them.” I think of the missing finger on Colt’s hand, the burn scars. His dad’s missing finger, and his cane. Mabel is not just blowing out of town but changing her name so they can’t track her down. I swallow hard, wanting to hear the details I’ve been in the dark about for so long, but fuck. The blasé tone in Baron’s voice makes my skin crawl.

“And then there’s Jeremiah and Jedediah. Twins, actually. Jed had some kind of accident and died of blood loss. He had kids, but they’d already grown and moved away. Jeremiah has two kids. His son would have been a sophomore this year, but he disappeared mysteriously right before he would have started at Willow Heights. But he didn’t change his name, and see, I’m pretty good at finding people. We’ll be watching, and if he ever comes back, we’ll be ready. And then their daughter Magnolia will be a freshman next year. That’ll be fun.” “You don’t even know these people, and you’re literally torturing them until they die?” “They tortured August,” he says, as if that explains everything. “Some little twelve-year-old girl tortured August? Or, wait, she’d have been ten at the time?” “She’s a Darling,” he says. “They would have done the same to us. They tried. The difference is, wherever they tried, we succeeded.” “All because one of them dared to love your sister?” “They killed our sister,” he says, his voice hard. “There are two more Darling men, too. They were disowned by the grandfather and changed their names, but we found them. One of them had moved away, but one of them actually lived in the same trailer park where I believe you hail from. John Jr. I hear he was close with your mom a while back, maybe when you were really little?”

I don’t say anything to that. Lots of men have been close with my mom, and it’s not like I want to explain to Baron Dolce that my mom is a trailer park slut. “Never heard of him,” I say after a minute, because it feels like Baron’s expecting something. “Oh, well, I guess he OD’d, so he’s out of the picture, anyway.” “You literally studied Darling family history and found anyone with that name and just destroyed their lives?” “Not just their name,” he says. “Their blood. Blood makes family, not a name. A name is something you can hide behind or run from, but you can’t hide your DNA. Their blood is poison to this town. And poison has to be eliminated.” “That’s… Harsh.” “They started it.” I lie there not even sure what to say. I want to laugh at the ridiculous pettiness of his response. That’s all he has to say? They started it? That’s the excuse of a five-year-old on the playground. I’m pissed off for the Darlings and I barely know one of them. But shit. No wonder people say the Walkers are evil. They’re brutal as fuck, and Baron just sounds like he’s recounting a boring story about our grandparents when he talks. This isn’t something that happened to someone else, though. He and Duke and yes, August, did all this. Drove people to suicide. Had them imprisoned and committed to mental institutions. I shiver at the thought of what they would do if they found out I was reporting to someone about them. They’d fucking kill me is what. So I better get Mr. D what he wants and cut all ties, the sooner the better. “The Darlings started it by kidnapping August?” I ask, pulling the sucker from my mouth. “That, and stealing Crystal, and even before that, they fucked with our dad when he was in office here. Walkers never forget.” “Can I ask you something?” I say after thinking that over. “Why do you do anything your dad says? August’s 32, and you’re what? 26? You don’t have to do that.” “You wouldn’t understand,” he says. “You come from a fucked up family.” “And yours is so functional.” “Family is everything to the Walkers,” he says. “That’s what Crystal forgot.” “Damn,” I say. “That’s cold.” “It’s a fact,” he says. “People always say that—cold hard truth, cold hard facts. But facts aren’t cold anymore than they’re hot. They’re just facts.”

And that’s the cold part, I think to myself. This guy isn’t just cold, his heart is made of ice. August can make himself that way, but there’s some switch he flips inside to get there. But August feels. He feels a whole fucking lot, probably more than he wants to. Enough that he goes into that dead-eye mode to protect himself. Baron, though… Baron’s ice cold to the core. I remember thinking that about Mr. D, and I wonder yet again if I got it wrong, if it’s not a gross old guy but a hot young guy. “So, she forgot, and she died for it,” I say. “Is that what your dad says to get you to obey him? He threatens to kill you?” “Dad would never threaten us,” Baron says. “He used to use Crystal to get August to do what he wanted, though. But he’s not blunt like August. With Dad, it’s always a subtle suggestion, a gentle reminder of where we stand.” “You admire him,” I say. It’s laced through every word he speaks, in his tone of voice, as clear as his admiration for his brother. That makes him that much scarier. He’s so detached it’s unnatural and a little terrifying. How can that same boy be lying here stroking my hair and pillowing my head, giving me his sweatshirt when I’m cold and telling me I’m his friend? “He’s a self-made millionaire,” Baron says. “What’s not to admire?” The fact that he pimps out his own kids, first off.

I don’t say anything, though. I don’t know if their father does that or if it’s August’s doing. I don’t know if the twins know, or if they do it, too. And I’m not about to spill that kind of information to anyone, not even August’s brother, without knowing. “Duke’s passed out cold,” Baron says after a few minutes. “Guess we’re alone.” “Yeah,” I say, moving to sit up. Baron’s hand tightens in my hair, though, and he sits up, so my head is in his lap. “Stay,” he says. “Maybe now that we have a minute alone together…” “What?” I ask, turning toward him even though I can’t see him in the dark. “You’re going to hit on me?” “No one would know,” he says, his fingers gently stroking my hair. “I’d know,” I say. “You’d know.” “Just a little suck?” he asks, and a second later, he pushes himself against my face. I don’t know when he whipped his dick out, but it’s hard and hot and so shocking that for a second, I don’t move. Then reality kicks in and I scramble away. “What the fuck, Baron.” “You make me so hard,” he says. “I’ve been thinking about it ever since I saw you going down on August. And listening to you lick that sucker… I know you feel it, too. You’re attracted to me.”

“Look, Baron,” I say. “Sure, I’ll admit you’re hot. Maybe if I wasn’t into your brother, I’d be into you. But I am, and I’m not.” “Just for a minute,” he says, his voice almost pleading. He takes my hand and gives it a little squeeze. “I just want to feel your mouth. I won’t even make you swallow.” He pulls my hand down, wrapping my fingers around his hard length. It throbs in my hand, and I gulp at the sensation. “No way.” I yank my hand back, my heart hammering. “You shouldn’t even be asking. The only way that’s happening is if you rape my face like your brother did.” “I’m not going to force you to do anything,” he says. “If I did, you’d tell August, and he’d kick my ass. But if you want to do it, no one will tell him. It’ll be just between us. Our little secret. Like what I told you here tonight. I trusted you. Don’t you trust me?” “It’s a little hard when you’re literally telling me to keep a secret from the guy I—the guy I’m seeing.” He’s quiet for a second, and I think he’s going to ask what I was about to say, if I was going to let slip the L-word. “Just this once?” he asks instead.

“Fuck you, Baron,” I say, getting up and feeling my way through the dark. I don’t know where I’m going, but I want to be further from him and his dick. My pulse is still stuttering, and I don’t like the uncertain feeling in my belly one bit. “I could make it worth your while,” he says. “I could make you a Swan.” “What?” “Just because you didn’t let us take turns with you, that doesn’t mean it couldn’t still count. If you fucked multiple Swans… You’d be sexed in.” “You said three of you.” “I bet I could convince Duke,” he says. “Maybe if you just gave him head, too… It’s not even sex. But we could tell them it was.” “And I’d be a Swan.” “Betray a friend for a Swan…” he says, quoting the challenges I read. “And I faced my fear in the passage?” “Didn’t you?” “So that would be all the challenges. And the gauntlet—blowing you and Duke—would get me in.” “Just like you wanted.” I think about that for a second. I could be on the inside. I’d give Mr. D everything he wanted.

. But I’d lose August, and somewhere along the way, he became more important. “I’ll pass,” I say. “I try not to go around trading sexual favors to get what I want.” “Not even when it’s what you want, too?” he asks, his voice closer than I expected. “Touch me, and you’ll see exactly how much I want it,” I say, dropping the sucker stem on the floor so my fists are ready. “And you’ll be pissing out a hole in the side of your dick for the rest of your life.” “Jesus,” he says. “You’re fucked up, you know that?” “You know what’s more fucked up? You continued to harass me when I said I wasn’t interested. I’m interested in August. That’s it. Not you, not Duke, not any of your other Swans.” “You’ll change your mind when you’re the meat in a twin sandwich,” he says. “But I’ll let you have it your way. For now.” “Gee, thanks for not raping me. Don’t let me forget to give you a gold star on our way out.” “I’d appreciate that.” I stalk over to the side of the room and find a chair. I curl up in it to wait for morning. Even with the hoodie, it’s so fucking cold I’m shivering, though.

“Come on, don’t sleep over there,” Baron says. “I put my dick away. Come over here by us. It’s too cold to sleep alone.” “I’d rather not get raped in my sleep.” “That’s not our style,” he says. “Though, if you have a kink about that, I have a friend who could help you out.” “No, thanks.” “For fuck’s sake, just relax,” he says. “I was just seeing if you wanted it bad enough. Obviously, you don’t. You’re not committed enough to be a Swan.” “And you’re not going to try to molest me in my sleep?” “What fun is that?” he asks. “If you don’t fight back, it’s not worth taking.” “You’re really selling this.” “Come on,” he says. “It’s cold down here, and you stole my hoodie, and I don’t want to snuggle my brother’s blacked-out ass. You’re going to freeze over there by yourself. I promise I won’t fuck with you anymore. I get it. You’re August’s, and until he’s done with you, you’re off limits.” “I’m sleeping with my pocketknife in my hand,” I say. “I’ll cut you if you grope me.” “Deal,” he says. “Now get over here and let us keep you warm.”

I make my way back over and slide down next to Duke. Baron scoots over and wraps an arm around me. I have to admit, it’s nice to feel them on either side of me, keeping me warm like he promised, instead of holding onto my pride and freezing my ass off in a chair. Still, I don’t sleep until I feel him relax, his breathing going deeper as he falls into sleep first. I blink awake when the electricity comes back on, the light on the ceiling flickering a few times before remaining on. It takes a second for my eyes to adjust and see August standing over us. I scramble up, my heart stampeding in my chest. My hands fly up as if to defend myself from the accusation in his eyes. “It’s not—we were just sleeping.” “Did you fuck them?” he asks quietly. “No,” I say, my hands falling to my sides. I remember Duke’s threat from last night. No matter what happened, there’s not a damn thing I can do to convince him if they say otherwise. “Not for lack of trying,” Duke says, stretching his arms over his head. Baron sits and picks up his glasses and my knife from the floor before standing. “Didn’t touch her,” he says. “We tried everything you said to.” I snatch my knife back and turn on August. “What the fuck? Is this some kind of game to you?”

He gives me a cool look. “You wanted to be a Swan. I just wanted to know how bad you wanted it.” “You were testing me? You really think I’d fuck your brothers? That’s not even part of the initiation, is it? You just wanted a reason to dump me.” “Hey, don’t be upset about it,” he says with a lazy smile. “You passed.” “You were never going to let me into the Swans, were you? This is all just a hilarious game to you, seeing what you can make me do.

Even if I passed every challenge, you’d never let me in your little, preppy boys club.” “And you should thank me for that,” he says quietly, his dark eyes going serious. “Fuck you, August,” I say, stomping past him and up the stairs. “Oh, I will,” he says behind me. “The only question is, should I let you cool down first or rage fuck you right now?” “Try it and see what happens,” I snap. It feels good to step into the library and slam the door in his face. I’m tired and sore from sleeping on the floor, not to mention I’m wearing the same clothes as yesterday but with the addition of a good amount of dirt. On top of that, I don’t even have my bag. But there’s only fifteen minutes until the morning meeting starts, which means I can’t go home without missing it. No matter what I said to Baron last night, I still fucking hate August half the time.

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