#i wanted to put asuma but he dead

[breeofbree]

Bells and Black Feathers

Itachi x f!reader

Slowburn. Itachi. OG Naruto setting. I really wanted my first Itachi fanfic to be longer since I’ve never written for him before and I usually only do quick stories. Please enjoy. Also, I apologize for the trauma and angst. But if this receives good feedback, I may make this in to a series 🫢

Bells. Bells were known in our clan as the harbingers of incoming change. We used them during clan ceremonies. Weddings, funerals, even birthdays. I was so sick of hearing bells. It was as if the drone of a metal ball racking around a hollow shell followed me wherever I went, even in to the village. Even worse, our clans genjutsu was hearing based, and you guessed it, we used bells. I almost thought I was crazy when I heard the telltale jingle faintly from beside me. I couldn’t help but check my pockets frantically to make sure mine were properly put away to not send anyone near by in to an accidental genjutsu. It was as if I’d gone crazy, hearing the chirp of a tiny bell pass beside me once again as I bump in to it,” my apologies.”

Bells don’t talk, and they definitely don’t have handsome features like the dark orbs that barely even spare a glance my way as they help me up from the beaten path on my way to the gates. 

“No, I wasn’t looking. It’s my bad, your bell made me think I was about to endanger everyone here.” I ramble on, completely awestruck at the cloaked man in front of me. Looking down, I can only hold my gasp at the sight of the all knowing red clouds. As a Jonin, we’re trained to watch for and decipher these cloaks to pinpoint the Akatsuki. But why would they be rash enough to lurk on the edge of the village out in the country? 

“Nonsense, I believe we both had our eyes on something that distracted us. As it is, I must be on my way.” He replies, not letting even one emotion bubble to the surface as his face stays as still as stone.

“Hey, what’s your name?” I ask, knowing it didn’t matter, he was a threat regardless. But the longer I could keep him here, the quicker I could subdue him.

“I believe that’s best saved for our next encounter. Farewell.” He’s already disappeared as his last word rings through my ears. It takes a second to shake the eerie feeling creeping up my back, but once composure is regained, I’m already breaking in to a dead sprint.

“Asuma! Hey! Asuma, damnit where are you?” I’m calling out to him before even hitting our usual meeting spot for missions, only to be answered with the wind. The only other shinobi with worse timing than Asuma was the only one to show up, lazily sauntering to our spot,” yell any louder and he might just hear you on the other side of the village, Y/N.”

“Listen, we’re being watched. What I’m about to tell you… you have to believe me.” I begin, gripping his shoulder so I can lean in and whisper,” the Akatsuki, they’re in the village.”

“Okay, I know we’re both well versed in pranking but this is a new level. Even for you.” Kakashi sighs, yanking at his ear lobe in mock pain. No, not mock pain… it was the signal that someone was possibly listening to our conversation. I had almost forgotten about it since we never had to resort to it, not for years anyways. It was a trick we would use in our younger years to signal when Asuma or Guy would attempt to listen to our private gossip sessions. 

“Anyways, if you’re done fooling around, I’m going to find where Asuma has wandered off to., you stay here just in case Guy shows up early.” He sighs, the only signal that shows he knows exactly where they’re at is his eyes darting to the right in the direction of the river. 

“Guy can figure out where we are, I’m coming with you.” I mutter, kicking at the dirt road and tailing directly on his heels. Kakashi spares a glance back, pointing to his eye and shaking his head no before covering it with his hand. I’m assuming it means don’t look, but my eyes wander anyways. I was good at taking in the scenery and doing the opposite of what I was told since I had the means to get myself out of trouble. What I wasn’t expecting to see was Asuma and Kurenai working as a team, yet still struggling against the man who had bumped in to me earlier and a new companion. Kurenai was in the river, looking winded as Kakashi, steps in front of me to block my vision, reaching down to grip my vest,” go find Guy. That’s an order.”

Kakashi stares unyieldingly until I relent, sprinting to the village. 

I heave deeply, resting against the side of a vendors stand when I see the familiar and vibrant neon orange leg warmers parading in the air as Guy walks on his hands. 

“H-hey! Guy! Come take a stroll with me real quick.” I huff out as quickly as I can between breaths, snapping one of his leg warmers to get his attention. 

“Y/N! I was just on my way to the gates to meet up with the team, what’s the hurry all of a sudden? Finally accepting my offer of a romantic stroll? This mission can wait for the sake of love if it must!” Guy sputters out, clambering back to the way a normal human stands. I can’t help but roll my eyes,” sure, yeah. Let’s move it. We got places to be Guy.”

He follows against my tight grip as I lead him to the river, quickly losing my patience as he mutters on. 

We finally reach the area once again, seeing not much has happened other than Kakashi looked to be wounded… internally? Maybe winded?

“The river? The perfect place for- Kakashi! No one messes with my rival except me!” Guy gasps out, quickly disappearing from my side. He lands between the two sides, splashing the water as everyone stays at a standstill. After a brief moment of communication, the two Akatsuki vanish, leaving the others to tend to Kakashi. I run across the water, quickly reaching for Kakashi with my medical abilities only to be stopped by Asuma,” he needs to go to the hospital, don’t even waste your chakra. Notify… someone.”

“Who, Asuma? There’s no time to waste, if I’m not needed here, I’m going after them!” I shout, already taking off for the treeline. 

“Y/N, get back to the village. You’ll be in worse trouble if you pursue them.” Guy calls out, quickly catching up. I can’t help but laugh,” with what hokage, Guy? We have the chance to take them out now. So let’s move it! There’s not currently a hokage to give us orders and I’m not going to sit around and wait.”

“Y/N, stop. You aren’t even thinking. His genjutsu is unbreakable.” Guy shouts, finally outrunning me to stop me in my tracks. I bluff my defeat, silently reaching for the bells at my side,” I’m sorry, Guy. I can’t let them get away.”

The bells twirl delicately around the metal rod they were strung to carefully by a clan elder the day I was born, twisting around to create a melodious genjutsu even Guy was too slow to release from. Normally, he had warning and could break it in time. But the look of betrayal as he’s frozen in to place, sends a pang through my chest,” I’ll show you the life you wish to have.”

Having to state my intentions of a genjutsu was a downfall, and I cringe at the thought of Guy’s ideal life. But I can only move forward to give myself enough distance with the bells, as once I’m out of earshot, the genjutsu may be broken within moments. 

After what felt like miles, I drop the bells back down, taking a brief second to slow down and catch my breath. The sky unrelentingly fades to grey as thunder rolls in,” because why wouldn’t it rain?”

I curse to myself, knowing the seconds before rain were precious in the effort to find any sign of tracks. I drop down to a single footprint that stops in the middle of a clearing, looking around frantically to find another. As my head whips back to the tree I was just in, a bell sounds just beside my ear. Ice fills my veins as I freeze in a slight terror.

“You’re alone.” The man from earlier breathes out. I force myself to focus my eyes to the ground and keep my cool,” yes.”

“That wasn’t a question but thanks for the clarification. You aren’t here to subdue me, you’re here for answers.” He continues, trailing a finger across my back as he circles around me, examining me almost before he continues,” you don’t know who I am, do you?”

“I don’t exactly keep my bingo book on me all the time, I just know you’re Akatsuki. It’s my job to train Genin now, not chase after criminals all the time.” I huff, refusing to look up as his finger prods at my jaw in an attempt to lift my gaze,” I’m not falling for your genjutsu.”

Regretfully, I still look up due to the persistent tug at my jaw, being met with the wondering dark orbs that I’d witnessed earlier. 

“If I wanted to place you under a genjutsu, I would’ve done so by now, Y/N.” He drops his hand, revealing the slightest smirk on his face. I confusingly take in his features as I try to figure out why they were so familiar before i land on the mutilated leaf headband that rested against his forehead, sweeping back his raven hair. 

“How do you know my name?” I mutter, reaching for the silver block on his headband to run my fingers along the slashed leaf in the middle. His hand is quick to grip mine,” you truly don’t remember do you?”

“Unfortunately, no.” I sigh, regretting that I was fully enamored with the handsome criminal in front of me. 

“We were Genin together. Itachi Uchiha.” He says coldly. The realization on how long it took myself to puzzle the pieces together hits like a ton of bricks. But I have no recollection of ever being in the same class, let alone knowing him.

I can only shake my head in response.

“If you can’t remember, let me show you.” Itachi sighs defeatedly, looking directly in to my eyes as his own bleed in to the notorious red sharingan. I prepare myself for a genjutsu, seeing as I find myself back in the classroom sitting at my desk. The day in question is hazy, but I still remember the doodle I was drawing. I also remember the pain I’m about to experience. As if on cue, my broken pencil I was trying so hard to continue to write with, slices my palm. I can’t control any movements, it’s a memory that can’t be altered. My tiny hand recoils in pain as younger me whimpers,” ah, dang it! I can’t bleed on this dress, my mom just got it for me.”

“Allow me.” The young boy beside me bubbles with a rising smile, quickly pulling a bandage roll from the backpack beside him,” my brother can be clumsy so I tend to carry extras just in case.”

“You callin’ me clumsy?” Young me accuses him sharply. I was always ‘abrasive’ as my sensei Shikaku regularly stated during our outings with Choza and Inoichi’s teams. 

“Not at all, do you always assume the worst so quickly?” The young version of Itachi questions back. My memory jogs and I can feel my current self mouth the same words I’m about to relive,” I can assume we’re going to be good friends if you’re brave enough to call me out on my crap.”

The scene fades to darkness, sitting at the end of the dock in the Uchiha compound with our feet dangling off the edge.

“Do it again!” A slightly older me shrieks in a fit of laughter as Itachi stands once again, sending a fire ball across the pond. 

“The simplest things surely entertain you. It’s amazing.” He chuckles, sitting back down as my body falls against the dock to look at the stars,” you amaze me, honestly.” 

I can still feel the heat against my cheeks at the confession I had made long ago. 

“Y/N?” He asks quietly.

“Yeah?” I question back.

“Even though we’re still young, do you ever get the feeling we’ll be together forever?” He questions sheepishly.

“We’ll always be friends, that’s not even a question. Don’t be so weird.” I laugh, reaching up to punch his shoulder.

“What if we’re destined to be more than friends?” Itachi continues with his questions, looking over to catch my pondering face,”… we’re still young. If it happens, it happens. We have plenty of years left to stay just how we are. Like you always say, it’s better to wait than spend the rest of your life regretting a rash decision.”

It flickers again, this time it’s my mother, uncontrollably sobbing at the kitchen table that woke me from a dead sleep due to the excitement of finally becoming a chunin,” mom, are you okay?”

I try to rub away the tiredness from my eyes as she shakes her head,” go back to bed, Y/N. It’s nothing you would understand at your age.” 

“Try me.” Twelve year old me crosses her arms as I watch my mothers sadness turn to anger,” you think because you’re a chunin now you can handle a tragedy in your own village? Well it’s time to grow up, kid. There was a massacre on the Uchiha compound. The whole clan is dead. Thanks to your little boyfriend, that Itachi kid. Stop putting your trust in others. Start becoming that ‘perfect’ shinobi you boast that you are Y/N. It won’t save our village, it won’t get those people their lives back. You will do so little, it won’t even matter by the time you’re my age, or even your death.”

She burst in to tears once again. Younger me couldn’t be upset at her, she was already upset with herself for having to end her career so early and our father leaving. I let her take that anger out on me, as long as it was never directed towards my sister and she never had to see it. 

“W-what’s wrong, Y/N?” I feel the small tug at my pajamas as my little sister clings tightly against my leg. I can only put a smile on my face as I lift her small frame,” moms sad because we aren’t getting the sleep we need, how about I tuck you back in to bed?” 

I still feel the pain in my eye sockets from crying throughout the rest of that night. Betrayal from my own mother and someone else I thought I’d loved. 

The genjutsu fades once again, unknown scenery flourishes around me. I look down to see I now bear the Akatsuki robe. I look forward to the faceless crowd that slowly comes in to focus, fingers pointing as they all unanimously mumble the word,” traitor.”

It becomes louder as the people begin encircling me, cornering me off like an injured animal on display. Several faces become distinct, my mother, my sister, Shikaku sensei and his friends, even the hokage that had just given his life for the village. As several kunai impale me, the genjutsu turns to red as the pain sets in.

I soon feel the gracious drops of rain replacing the stabbing ghost pains, quickly becoming a downpour, the genjutsu fades completely. I now realize why Kakashi had been so drained earlier, if it wasn’t for the ice cold adrenaline, I would’ve been passed out already.

“As you can see, we’ve met before. We were only mindless children then, cloaked by masks to hide our true identity.” He drops to a solemn tone, tilting his head upwards to bask in the quickly chilling rain before his red eyes flash back to me,” no matter how similar our paths are, our fates deserve to end differently. if you choose this life, it’s only the same. But you risk having your identity known nationwide and your idealistic life thrown away. Do you choose to face death everyday? Do you choose to betray a village you call home?” 

In the time it takes me to blink, he’s now mere inches from my face, hand outstretched,” if you can say yes, your heart is in the wrong place. Turn around and go back to the leaf. Do not pursue me any further, Y/N.”

Two of his fingers ghost over my brows for just a second, I can barely notice the thoughts running behind his tired eyes, but the slight flick of his view to the left gives him away. He decides to retract his fingers, and drapes his other hand to rest over the top of my head while I drop to my knees. My Jonin vest feels heavy with rain, maybe even regret that i didn’t even remember one of my closest friends as a child, maybe even my first love, but most of all the one who made it seem I wasn’t capable of loving anyone else. 

“How could I not remember anything you just showed me?” I babble, looking up to his now normal eyes as tears bubble at my lashes, only to be concealed by the rain. 

“Because It was a burden I relieved you of. You should be thankful.” He answers coolly, refusing either of us the blessing of breaking eye contact. I flick a collection of tears and water angrily from my face,” younger me was in love with you. We loved each other. You can’t deny that.”

His eyes trickle down to the hand fidgeting with the metal rod at my side, his face illuminating against a streak of lightning,” You’re a fool to think an auditory genjutsu would even begin to work on me.”

“No, but metal rods are great conductors of electricity.” I seethe, reaching my musical rod above me to the sky as I grip his arm that still rested atop my head. It was a weak last ditch effort, i couldn’t subdue him, but I could at least kill us both. As quickly as the white steak shoots down towards us, we’re transported further in to the forest. My hand is slightly burnt, but I find myself furled tightly in Itachi’s arms, back to his chest as his cloak billows around us in the increasing winds. I chuckle slightly,” so, you do still care about me.”

“Nonsense, I just prevented you from unnecessarily ending both of our lives.” Itachi utters out, clearing his throat.

“Bullshit. You could’ve let me fry in that lightning strike and saved yourself, easily.” I assert my dominance, twisting in his arms to face him as he refuses to let go. He looks down, smirking as he smoothes away a few strands of hair that cling to my face,” if I could love as easily as I fought against others, you would’ve been mine the day I bandaged your adolescent hand. This however, is not a life for love. My destiny is to die and I refuse for you to have any part of it.”

“Then just give me this moment.” I exhale, bringing a hand to rest on the side of his face,” I’ve just learned about you all over again and I refuse to let you leave without a word just like when we were kids.”

“You seen what I did to my clan.” He reminds me quietly.

“And for some reason, I feel like your hand was forced in to doing it. The Itachi I just witnessed loved his clan. He loved the leaf village. He defended the village he betrayed.” I share my quick observation. 

“This conversation is over.” Itachi warns, squinting his eyes in remorse and possibly a hint of anger. I just knew I was right. And if I’m able to return to the village, I’ll have some research to do. 

“If you don’t want to talk about it, then you’ll have to find a damn good way to shut me up, because I have a lot of questions.” I shoot back, anxiety of not knowing the story creeps against my body. And just as I’m about to start my rampage of questions, his lips crash against mine and his hands grip tightly at my shoulders, letting the cool rain water dripping from us both clash together, pooling down to our chins before it drips against the cloak that weakly offers us the tiniest bit of shelter. As he pulls away, his eyes flutter slowly, taking in my look of confusion. Sadly for him, it’s only created more questions, but most of all it also created answers.

“You still love our village. You still love me.” I gasp out looking at the furrow in his angering brows,” and to continue in protecting the things I love, you must not interfere or prod any further. Return to the village before you end up in the same position. This is my last warning, Y/N. Or this will end badly for the both of us.”

He pushes me against my shoulders, sending my body head first to the ground frozen, in a state of shock as the world melds to a red haze. Just as I hit the ground, an inky black feather drops on my face, restarting the chain of events over again. And again. And again. Each time I fall, the feather drops, I smack in to the ground and Itachi’s face melds against my vision as the sequence drones on for what feels like hours,” do you wish to be stuck in a loop of constant suffering? Living out your days where every last one is the same, ending with an unbearable pain… just to realize it’ll happen again. And again. And again. This is the constant pain you will feel outside of the village as a rogue. You don’t understand that by pressing further on this matter, by seeking me purposefully after this point, my only choice would regretfully be having to kill you.”

A scream tears at my throat, only to be cut off from hitting the ground again, and after what felt like a whole day stuck in the same loop, I find myself on the ground mere seconds from passing out once again. I look up to see Itachi’s face hovering above mine and feel his knees supporting my head. He swiftly brushes a rain soaked strand of hair from my face and leans in for one last breathy statement,” I truly hope one day you’ll be strong enough to understand. When that day comes, I will be long gone but I will never ask for your forgiveness.”

As my eyes shut, he scoops down for one last kiss and disappears with the sound of a ghost. Silence ushers a single black feather to land against my cheek, allowing me to finally give in to the depleted chakra ebbing towards unconsciousness. 

Bells. The pain of having to hear those stupid bells. A single chirp awakens me in a startle, grasping at the sterile white blanket around me as I gasp in the stale air. 

“Hey, lay down damnit. You’ve gone and gotten yourself in to enough trouble already, Y/N.” Shikaku sensei grumbles from the bedside, slamming me backwards as gently as possible as he sets my bell staff against the table.

“Why are you here sensei? Don’t you have more important village duties to attend to?” I mumble out, finally relaxing enough to stare at the ceiling.

He groans, pondering what he’ll say next,” with a lack of Jonin from the recent attack, Asuma rang in a favor to help track you so they could get Kakashi Hatake to immediate medical attention. We first found Guy almost six miles from you, stuck in a genjutsu. Wonder who would be rash enough to do that...”

“How’s Kakashi?” I ask, refusing to meet what I assume is his drained and less than pleased face.

“He’ll be in medical care for a while. Same goes for you. You’re almost worse off than him. With how much you two get in to trouble, I’m starting to wonder if you’re related. Anything else you want to ask, kid?” He questions, most likely already knowing the answer. I turn to look in to his unimpressed eyes,” I should ask you that first.”

He finally smirks,” we’ll keep this conversation between us so long as I don’t have to pry it out of you.”

I could always appreciate the fatherly bond Shikaku established since my early chunin days, realizing my own mother could barely provide the support or parental love for my sister and I. Shikamaru had even called me big sister begrudgingly. Shikaku finally parts his lips after thinking on it,” why did you put Guy under a genjutsu?”

So he knew it was my genjutsu after all.

“His taijitsu was too weak against our target. We were tailing the man that left Kakashi in the state he’s in now. I only did it to protect him.” I answer truthfully. It was best to avoid seeing Guy hurt, even if I feel no romantic attraction to all of his… not too subtle advancements. 

“So you proceeded to pursue someone as a one person unit you knew you wouldn’t win against? How smart. It’s a miracle you made it back with just depleted chakra and a burnt hand. It’s almost as if the target took pity on you.” He ponders, slowly moving his eyes back to meet mine in confirmed and definite disappointment.

“I was just able to use my staff as a lightning conductor to buy myself some time before being placed under a genjutsu. No one was hurt. That’s all that matters.” I huff out, turning my body completely away in anger before Shikaku sounds off my bells again in contemplation,” a genjutsu user falling for another genjutsu is unlikely, unless this genjutsu came from the power of the sharingan. I also trained my students to not pursue dangerous opponents with those kind of powers. But I know I trained my students better than that, right Y/N?” 

“Are you just here to lecture me, or are you looking for answers?” I sneer out, slowly becoming agitated at his sensei personality taking over his fatherly one.

“Both. Just as I and my jutsu are useles in utter darkness, yours is useless when you don’t use your mind to think properly. I think we can silently agree you won’t try and pursue Itachi anymore and you’ll stay here until you’re fully healed. Then we will go through some training. You, me and Shikamaru. Just like old times.” Shikaku chuckles out, revealing that without even telling him, he already knew. I toss my pillow at him in an attempt to stop his laughing,” does this mean you’re old self is coming out of retirement as a sensei?”

“Don’t throw the word old out so loosely. I’m only returning as your sensei because I think your own mind is dulling with age.” He smirks, returning to his fatherly demeanor, but I could still see the subtle look of worry behind the joking facade. I refused to notify him of my actual encounter with Itachi, but he leads me to believe he knew of our past and it’s easy for a Nara to put two and two together.

“Yeah, yeah. Now get out so I can rest up and show you I’m just fine without a sensei.” I laugh out as he shakes his head,” prove me wrong, Y/N. I’m not bailing you out of any future mistakes.”

“I’m counting on that.”

With a final word, he kicks a resting foot off the wall and throws his hands in to his pocket to stroll out the open door nonchalantly. I needed rest, and I was told not to press any further. But I had research to do, even if it was from a hospital bed. I was going to get to the bottom of this, even if my destiny entwines to meet the same bitter end as Itachi presumes his will be.

#Itachi #itachi x y/n #itachi x you #itachi x reader #itachi naruto #uchiha itachi #itachi uchiha #itachi imagines #itachi fanfiction #itachi fic #naruto fanfiction #naruto oneshot #uchiha x reader

[issybee06]

Because…

Part I

Warnings: swearing, underage drinking, smoking, talking about war, trauma dumping

Phosphenes

(n.) the colors or “stars” you see when you rub your eyes.

……………….…………………………………………………………

“Tadaima…”

Genma looked up from his scroll, wrinkling his nose, “Shit, Hime…what is Inoichi doing to you?”

I scoff, pulling the bag of groceries through the door before closing it, “thanks, you sure know how to flatter a girl.”

Genma smirked proudly, getting up from the couch, “my pleasure.”

He began rummaging through the bag, “did you get the sake?”

Glaring, I hit his arm with a carrot. Like a baby, he whined dramatically and I pulled out the sealed bottle, “yes I did, and you should have gotten it earlier today when you got off your shift!”

He groaned flopping on a chair, “but I had to get the cake!”

I give him a sharp glare, “do you know how hard it is to get Sake the day after new years? I had to go to 5 different stores, Genma, 5!”

He waves his hand dismissively, and I continue to put away the food in the fridge, “besides, I thought we were getting Gai new weights.”

Genma gave a dry laugh, “Fucking Asuma already got him that.”

I sigh, putting the last of the food away, “what times the party?”

“Didn’t you help Kurenai with the invites? It’s at 7.”

Nodding, I pull off the grey TI jacket and head to my room.

��I’m gonna shower-don’t! Eat the cookies!”

He whines, putting the cookie back, “it’s not like anyone’s gonna notice!”

“I will.”

………………………………………………………………………….

5 years ago, on October 10, the Nine tails was released from my Jinchūriki sensei, Uzumaki Kushina which resulted in the death of hundreds of Shinobi, including my sensei and our Yondaime Namikaze Minato.

And for the past 5 years, I have been working in the TI building under Yamanaka Inoichi along with one of my close classmates Morino Ibiki. While Ibiki shined in the torture part of the department, I working in the more intelligence part.

The poison department…wasn’t what I had gone for initially, I had wanted to be a field medic that actually got to go out of the village, but my medical Ninjutsu was mediocre and mediocre gets people dead.

It wasn’t like I was disappointed, medics don’t actually engage in combat and my mother said my talents in jutsu would be waisted sitting on the sidelines.

But I guess sitting in a lab all day making and looking at the components of poisons is so much better. Either way I’m still not out there.

It’s still winter in Konoha, and despite being in the land of Fire, it got fucking cold.

Snow licked at our feet as Genma and I walked to Gais apartment, which was already booming with music and people talking.

I sighed, a large cloud of air coming out of my mouth. Genma wrapped an arm around my shoulder, squeezing me.

“Hey, easy up Hime. Let’s have fun getting shit faced with people we like.”

I laughed, “whatever you say, Baka.”

We walked up the first flight of stairs, heading to Gais second story apartment. Genma knocked on the door, giving two crisp knocks before being interrupted when Gai all but ripped the door open.

“MY OLD TEAMMATES!! YOU MADE IT AND JUST IN TIME FOR KARAOKE!!”

Genma and I smiled, and I wrapped my arms around Gai as he picked me up in a hug almost crushing the cookies, “happy birthday Gai-kun, sorry we’re a little late.”

“Nonsense! You’re here! That’s all that matters!”

Genma passed Gai the Sake bottle, smiling, “Happy 19th, Gai.”

Gai had always been the baby of our team, with me being a year older and Genma being 3years Gais senior, we as the older two took it in our power to baby Gai as much as we could…but now he was 19 and a full fledged Jonin.

Gai grinned at the Sake and then at Genma, “Genma! You sly dog! Where’d you find this?!”

I rolled my eyes as Genma gave me an apologetic look before nudging me in so that we wouldn’t freeze to death. Gai, the ever social butterfly, had invited not only our graduating academy class but also many other shinobi.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder as soon as I pulled my coat off, “Since you’re late, you own two shots!”

I laughed, taking the small shot glass and swigging it. It burned like a mother Fucker, shinobi alcohol has always been made stronger, but the feeling was familiar.

I couldn’t count all the times I had snuck off with Genma and/or Gai with a bottle of the cheep stuff when we were younger.

Genma and I got used to it quick, but poor Gai had never been able to get over being a lightweight…but boy was he a fun drunk.

Asuma two years ago had convinced Drunk Gai to run from the village gate to the stone head completely butt naked, and he had raised that challenge by doing it while running backwards on his hands.

No one could stop laughing for two days.

Gai laughed loudly, shaking the apartment with his booming voice, “now that you’re here, WE CAN START THE DRINKING GAMES!”

It had been an hour since Genma and I had arrived, and the alcohol and bright lights of the party was starting to get to my head.

I slipped out, opting to stand on the outside balcony. It was cold, like I had thought, but it was calming compared to the heat of 20+ shinobis crammed into Gais apartment. I enjoyed parties, I really did, but sometimes it all got too much.

I blame Asuma for this habit I think as I pull outa pack of cigarettes. Pulling one out, I place it between my lips as I search myself for my lighter.

Nothing. No lighter, meant it was in my fucking jacket at home.

Sighing, I run a hand through my hair before raising my hands to start weaving the all too familiar signs , when suddenly my body stiffened.

This chakra….

Fuck.

“Those things will kill you, you know.”

Turning my head, I look up, eyes softening at the source of the voice.

“You’re late, Kakashi. Party started at 7.”

The dog mask with the red painted on smile tilted, and the moon caught the soft glow of his lone Sharingan. He slowly and silently moved down the roof to be in the light, and I turned to face him fully.

“Oh? The time must have…slipped my mind.”

I frown, the cigarette dangling from my lips, “you should have come earlier. He’s your best friend, Kakashi-”

“Inu, (Y/n), I’m not off right now.”

My frown deepened, and I sigh,“Right.”

His mask tilted more, almost comically, “New haircut?”

I scowl, knowing he was being an ass. Stupid Genma a week ago had made a wrong swipe of his kunai during training, ending with me getting a free cut. Now, the hair curled just shy of my shoulders.

“Shout out to my barber.”

“Maybe I should see if Genma does men.” he evenly spoke and found a second there I could have sworn his tone was teasing.

I hum, weaving a few hand signs before blowing a small flame to light the cigarette And he hops down from the roof silently.

He stands fully, and I forget how tall the once shrimpy silver-haired man was when we were kids.

He’s still lean, not muscler like Gai, but he’s toned and I can’t help but press myself further away from him into the railing with a blush I convince myself that is from the alcohol.

Kakashi…ever since that day had barely showed his face around the village, opting to stay in the shadows. But every now and then, people were graced with getting a glimpse of him. It had been a good 2 years since we’d been this close, and that was in a room full of our comrades and in front of the council.

This, despite having all our friends a plate of glass away, was different.

“Those things will kill you.”

He repeated, tone commanding. I furrowed my brows until it clicked on my head that he wasn't some Anbu subordinate anymore, but a captain.

Still, I had never listened to him when we were kids…why start now?

I make eye contact as I take my first drag, and let the smoke swirl around me when I blow it out. I feel his eyes narrow, and I smirk with all the grace my drunk ass could muster up in front of Hatake Fucking Kakashi.

“If I die because of this, then that means I didn’t die a gory death in battle…and I’d say that’s a pretty good death for me.”

*let's see if you guys like this! If you do I'll write more!*

#hatake kakashi x reader #kakashi x reader #anbu kakashi x reader #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi x reader smut #kakashi x reader #naruto shippuden #naruto #genma shiranui #might gai #anko mitarashi

[sentinelpri]

Love Strategist

Shikamaru Nara hates going on missions without his best friend, Chouji Akimichi. The large man lightens the mood and makes Shikamaru laugh. Additionally, he’s a comforting and reassuring presence when things go wrong, and he contributes a lot. Not having him there bothers Shikamaru greatly as he treks through the land of snow with his other teammate, Ino Yamanaka, by his side. 

Another reason he hates not having Chouji on missions? Because, more often than not, when Chouji isn’t there, Shikamaru ends up being paired with exclusively Ino- who he is embarrassingly, stupidly in love with while she is none the wiser and insists on chasing after guys like Sasuke who want nothing to do with her. Just as his father predicted, Shikamaru has fallen in love with a stubborn, headstrong, beautiful woman.

Shikamaru wishes his father had been wrong.

Of course, Chouji just had to come down with the stomach bug that’s been going around right before they were about to leave. Shikamaru and Ino managed to complete the mission by themselves, but with Asuma dead and without Chouji there to act as a familiar buffer between the two of them, things are… Awkward.

Shikamaru feels uncomfortable… And a little sick, too. Part of him thinks he must’ve caught the bug if his current nausea and hot head are anything to go by. Even with the snow falling on them, he’s burning hot.

“Shika, are you good?” Ino suddenly asks. Shikamaru glances over at her. They’re walking side by side, and much to his dismay, Ino is somehow even more beautiful than she was yesterday. The hood of her winter cloak is down and revealing her long, blond hair. Her cheeks and the tip of her nose are dyed red from the cold. Long, blond lashes adorn her baby blue eyes, and said lashes are littered in the snowflakes that continue to fall from the sky. Shikamaru’s heart throbs. “Hey, did you hear me?”

“Oh,” Shikamaru says. He tries his best to swallow his nausea to no avail. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it. Just tired.”

“If you say so…” Ino trails off, clearly not convinced but also not wanting to press him any further.

Shikamaru lets out a sigh of relief, only to find himself dropping to the ground and vomiting into the snow after a few more seconds of walking. Ino immediately kneels by his side and puts a hand on his back, her expression laced with concern. 

Shikamaru can’t stand it. He can’t stand how beautiful she is, can’t stand how smart she is, can’t stand how caring she is. Admiring and loving someone so strongly makes him want to fly into the sun and get burnt into a fucking crisp. Alas, he doesn’t have the ability to fly, so he’s stuck on the ground with Ino rubbing his back as he pukes his guts out.

“Shikamaru! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” He lies through gritted teeth. 

“You’re puking, and you’re burning up,” Ino frowns upon putting a hand on Shikamaru’s forehead to check his temperature. “You don’t look fine!”

“Get off my back, would you?” Both because he doesn’t want Ino to baby him and because there’s nothing left in his stomach for him to get rid of, Shikamaru wipes his mouth on the back of his hand, stands up, and continues walking. “I said I’m fine.”

“Jeez, what’s up with you? You’ve been really on edge these last few days,” Ino presses as she follows after him. “Is it because you’re not feeling good?”

“Do I really need to tell you again?” Shikamaru snaps, to which Ino blinks in surprise. He feels somewhat guilty, but at the same time, she can’t be allowed to figure out the truth. It’ll ruin their friendship and everything else that their team has worked so hard to build. “I said I’m fine, Ino, drop it.”

“Shika, you’re clearly unwell!” Ino grabs Shikamaru by the shoulder and forces him to stop in place. “You need to rest.”

“I hate to pull rank on you, but I’m the one in charge here in case you’ve forgotten, Ino,” Shikamaru argues back and pushes Ino’s hands away from him. “And we need to make it back to the village as soon as possible to give the mission report to Lady Tsunade.”

At that, Ino jabs a finger into his chest and glares up at him. 

“You know, for as lazy as you are, you-”

“I know, I know,” Shikamaru steps out of Ino’s way and walks off to continue their trek, only for Ino to stand in front of him again. “I don’t wanna hear it.”

“Shikamaru,” Ino threatens, a warning tone to her voice. “Don’t make me take care of you by force. You know I will!”

She’s in his face, her nose almost pressing against his nose. Shikamaru can count her individual eyelashes and see the breaths that come out of her mouth fog up when they’re exposed to the cold air. More than anything, he wants to just lean in and kiss her already, but he doesn’t. Instead, he dodges her and storms off to a more heavily forested area a few feet away.

“God, you’re stubborn,” Shikamaru complains with a roll of his eyes. “Fine. Set up camp and we can rest here. Then, when I’m feeling better, we can continue enroute back to the village.”

“Finally!” Ino cheers as she puts their tent- that they’ve been having to share, alone- together and starts up a fire for them to boil some of their rations over. “See, was that so hard?”

“Harder than you’d think…”

The two quickly get settled with the tent set up, their rations cooked, and their sleeping bags laid out- side by side, uncomfortably close in the small confines of that stupid tent- and dressed down into weather-appropriate sleepwear. Shikamaru is afraid that, if he dares to eat, it’ll make him throw up even more, so he doesn’t despite Ino’s nagging. He lies on top of his sleeping bag instead of under it because of how bad his fever starts to get.

“Here,” Ino says as she crawls into the tent and places a washcloth doused in cold water over Shikamaru’s forehead. She kneels beside where he lays, looking like an angel. Shikamaru turns his head away. He hates that, since the mission is over, one of them doesn’t have to keep watch anymore. They just have to sleep next to each other like it isn’t weird. With Chouji there, it wouldn’t be weird, but with just the two of them, it definitely is. He can’t stand it. “Try to get some rest now, alright?”

“Yeah… Alright.”

~

When Ino and Shikamaru return from the mission, Shikamaru feels better- one, because he’s not sick anymore, and two, because he’ll get a break from Ino for a bit. The first thing he does is go to visit Chouji, who has apparently recovered from his illness as well. The other teen’s parents aren’t home, so the two of them sit on Chouji’s bed together, sharing a bag of chips as they talk candidly about everything that’s happened since they last saw each other.

The first sign there is of a lull in conversation, though, Shikamaru takes the opportunity to vent.

“Chouji,” Shikamaru starts.

“Yeah?”

“I’m in love with Ino.”

“...Yeah?” Chouji hums between bites of his snack and tilts his head, then shrugs. “I probably could’ve guessed. You don’t hide it very well. I mean, most people can’t get a read on you, so it’s not apparent to everyone, but it has been to me for a good amount of time.”

“Glad to know I’m that obvious about it,” Shikamaru scoffs.

“Why are you bringing it up now? Haven’t you felt this way for a while?”

“Yes, but the problem is that I don’t know what to do about it.”

“Well, Shika, you’re the strategist in the group. Surely you’ve got some sort of idea! …Right?”

“Not really. I’m a battle strategist, not a… Love strategist,” Shikamaru awkwardly says, and it’s true. He was never interested in romance when he was younger, and after his promotion to Chunin- and then to Jonin- he’s been so busy that he hardly has the time to think about it. “I’ve never even been on a date before.”

“Well, buddy, I’m in the same boat as you, so I’m not gonna be much help,” Chouji admits. “But why not just tell her?”

“Because things will change,” Shikamaru answers after thinking about it for a moment. “Whether she rejects my feelings or accepts them, things will be different for the rest of our lives… And we won’t be able to go back to the way things were before. Once you cross that line, there’s no pretending that it never happened, and I don’t know if I’m ready for that sort of change.”

“Dramatic take… Is change such a terrible thing to you?”

“We’ve been going through a lot of that lately,” Shikamaru answers in reference to the conflicts with the Akatsuki, Asuma’s death, Kurenai’s pregnancy, and everything else that’s happened since Naruto’s return to Konoha.

“Things could always be worse. I think… It’s better to tell her, even if it changes things. With everything going on right now, any of us could die at any time.”

“So you’re saying I should tell her because it’s better to not have any regrets on the off chance that one of us dies soon? Isn’t that a little dark?”

“Maybe, but it’s also realistic,” Chouji counters.

It’s quiet for a moment, but then, Shikamaru hears noise- and voices… Familiar voices; Chouza, Inoichi, and Shikaku, all in the kitchen chatting away.

“I guess I should-” Shikamaru pauses, realizing just how thin the walls are. If he can hear all of their parents chatting away just one room over… They must be able to hear Shikamaru and Chouji, too. “Wait, I thought you said your parents weren’t home?”

“Huh?” Chouji stops mid-chew to listen to the noise, then lets out a nervous laugh. “Oh, I guess dad must’ve come in a bit ago! I didn’t hear him.”

“Oh, God… How long have they been here? Do you think they heard us?”

“Probably,” Chouji shrugs again. “Want the last one?”

“Sure, I guess.”

So, Shikamaru takes the last chip and eats it before nervously slipping out of Chouji’s room. When he walks out to the kitchen, which he has to cross through to make it to the front door. Shikaku, Inoichi, and Chouza are all there. They go silent upon Shikamaru’s entrance and look at the ravenette as if they’re all struggling not to burst out into laughter.

“Please tell me you didn’t just…” Shikamaru cautiously starts, unsure of what to say.

“We did,” Shikaku answers with a chuckle.

“Wow, okay, uh-”

“Not that we didn’t already know, but if you’re going to ask my daughter out, at least take her to dinner, will you?” Inoichi demands. It’s a better reaction than Shikamaru could’ve expected- he knows the head of the Yamanaka clan has high expectations for his daughter, so he was partially expecting to have the shit beat out of him (or tortured out of him considering the man’s profession). This awkward, unsolicited advice is a much better alternative. “And buy her flowers!”

“Um… Okay, I guess,” Shikamaru nods in agreement, to which all three laugh at him. “Thanks for the advice?”

“You’re welcome.”

With that, Shikamaru leaves, both relieved and confused.

Days pass. After a while of debating between not saying anything at all and just letting the cat out of the bag, Shikamaru decided on the latter, as he figures someone else will let it slip if he doesn’t do it first. He reminds himself that the worst she can do is say no and act weird about it for the rest of their lives.

Yeah… Not too bad, right?

The ravenette makes his way to Ino and her family’s flower shop, knowing that Ino is working the register and should be getting off any minute now. He enters the building to see Ino at the counter, seemingly writing down that day’s orders. Upon noticing Shikamaru’s presence, Ino sets her pen down and walks out from behind the register to come up and talk to him.

“Shika, what brings you here? You need something?”

“Do you maybe want to go to dinner tonight?” He asks, averting his eyes. He feels like his face is on fire as Ino stares back at him. “I was thinking we could grab Korean barbecue.”

“Oh, sure! Chouji will be happy about that,” Ino happily answers, to which Shikamaru can’t help but wince. 

“Uh, actually, it’ll just be the two of us… If you don’t mind.”

“Really? What’s got Chouji so busy that he can’t come?”

“He’s… Hanging out with his dad,” Shikamaru quickly lies, knowing that Chouji will cover for him if asked about it- and also too embarrassed to explain upfront that he wants this to be a date.

“Huh… That sucks,” Ino answers, then shrugs and walks back to the register. “Anyway, yeah, I can come. I’m actually about to trade out with mom, so just give me a couple minutes and we can go if you’re ready.”

Shikamaru swallows, then nods.

“Sure.”

~

So, Shikamaru and Ino walk to the local barbecue restaurant, side by side. Normally, Chouji would be between them, but this time he’s not. Months ago, Asuma would’ve been there, too, walking on the outside of the group to ‘protect’ them from anyone on the street and urging them to walk on the sidewalk as if they were children. Shikamaru finds himself tearing up thinking about that, but he quickly blinks the tears away before Ino can notice and glances over at her to make sure she hasn’t. Thankfully, she’s still talking about her day at work- something about a customer who got mad that she wouldn’t take a pile of counterfeit money as payment for an expensive order of flowers.

“And it was so clearly fake! I mean, the color was off, the print was blurry, and the texture was all wrong- you’d have to be an idiot not to see it,” Ino rants, her normally pale cheeks cherry red. It seems like she’s getting amped up retelling the story, and Shikamaru can’t help but smile at how cute it is. “It was pretty insulting, especially when the guy had the gall to act like I was the idiot for thinking it was fake. He must’ve been from out of town or something because he had no idea that I’m a ninja based on how he tried to snatch one of the bouquets out of my hand like a jackass and make a run from it. I mean, seriously? Who robs a flower shop for anything but the money in the register?”

“I don’t know, you’d be pretty surprised at how stupid people can be sometimes, especially when they’re from out of town. They just can’t get away with shit here that they can in the civilian sectors of The Land of Fire. You know how different it is the further out we go from here,” Shikamaru pitches back in reference to the travel they’ve done to civilian villages and cities during some of their missions. “But what happened to the guy, anyway?”

“What do you think happened? I took the bouquet back and dragged him to the correctional facility.”

“Huh… Not surprised, but I doubt they’ll keep him there if he’s a civilian. Those guys would rip him to shreds.”

“Yeah, tell me about it,” Ino laughs, and with that, they fall into a comfortable silence for the rest of the walk.

Shikamaru can’t help but sigh. He stares at Ino, who continues walking next to him. She’s seemingly unaware of how he’s practically staring holes into her hands. He wants to reach out and hold one but fears that he’d either get punched in the face or receive a simple ‘ew, no’. He actually isn’t sure which would be worse. For all he knows, it could be both.

It’s odd because while Shikamaru is much closer to Ino than he would usually be, he isn’t satisfied with it. He wants to be closer, and the more he thinks about it, the more tense he becomes. Part of him regrets asking her to dinner in the first place. How’s he supposed to tell her the truth? On the flip side, how is he supposed to sit and eat with her for the next hour without absolutely losing his mind? What if he screws it up- or what if he does everything right and she still rejects him?

By the time they walk into the restaurant and get a table, Shikamaru is practically boiling over with anxiety. His Jonin vest and the blue shirt underneath it feel a little too tight, there’s sweat forming on his hairline and forehead, and his chest hurts. Ino sits across from him at the table they’re given and after a few moments pass, Shikamaru realizes she’s staring at him very intently.

“What is it, Ino? Did I do something?”

“Uh, your order…”

At that, Shikamaru blinks, then turns to see that a waiter is standing there. The poor man probably asked for his food and drink order god knows how long ago, and Shikamaru was too distracted to notice.

“Oh, shit. Sorry, man,” Shikamaru apologizes. He’d thought about trying something new today, but instead opts to order the first thing that comes to mind so he can end this awkward social situation. “I’ll just take a water and, uh… The short rib special. Thanks.”

“Awesome, thank you,” The waiter says and writes Shikamaru’s order down, but instead of leaving, he just stands there and clears his throat.

“The menu! Hand him your menu,” Ino whisper-yells from across the table.

Shikamaru grabs his menu and goes to hand it to the waiter, only for it to fall on the floor. It takes everything in him not to slam his head into the nearest wall as the waiter retrieves the menu and scurries away from their table.

 “Shika, what the hell is wrong with you?” Ino demands and crosses her arms over her chest.

“Huh?” Shikamaru tilts his head in feigned confusion.

Much to his dismay, Ino doesn’t buy it for so much as a second. Rather, she shoots a suspicious, accusatory glare in his direction and raises her voice at him.

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about, you-”

“I’m in love with you,” Shikamaru spits, the words tumbling out faster than his brain can process them.

“What?” Ino asks, eyes wide.

Shikamaru debates on trying to take it back- on trying to play it off and lie like he always has, but he knows it won’t work- not now, not after he’s already told her the truth. So, he decides to be honest.

“I said, I’m in love with you. I have been for a long time,” Shikamaru explains. “It’s been bothering me more lately, I guess. That’s why I’ve been acting off… And that’s also why I asked you to dinner tonight… So I could confess. Chouji wasn’t with his dad or anything, I just wanted it to be the two of us.”

“...Oh.”

“Oh?”

“It’s a lot to process!” Ino exclaims. “I didn’t think you were capable of feeling anything romantic like that!”

“Ouch,” Shikamaru says with a grimace. Right then, the waiter brings their drinks and meat platters to the table. “Thanks.”

Shikamaru sips on his water and ignores the plate of ribs he’s been given as well as the piping hot table grill that sits between him and Ino. She ignores the food for the time being as well- not that Shikamaru can blame her given the realization she’s just had about his feelings.

“No, no, I didn’t mean it like that! It’s just, well-” Ino continues, seemingly flustered. Shikamaru’s heart skips a beat. “I love you, too.”

“You don’t have to lie to me, Ino. If you don’t feel the same way, it’s fine,” Shikamaru sighs as he tries to put up the most casual act he can muster. In hindsight, he probably should’ve gone with ‘I like you’ instead of ‘I’m in love with you’ to avoid coming on as strong as he did. “We can just pretend this never happened and go back to being friends like we always were-”

“Don’t insult me by acting like I don’t know how I feel,” Ino insists. “I wouldn’t have said it if it weren’t true.”

Shikamaru glances up in disbelief, and to his surprise, finds no sign of dishonesty in Ino’s face. She meets his eyes and smiles at him.

“Oh.”

“So,” Ino starts as she places a piece of the skirt steak she ordered on the grill and watches it sizzle. Shikamaru mimics the action with his own food. “How long have you felt that way?”

“Uh, I dunno… It’s been a while though. You?”

“Couple years,” Ino shrugs, her cheeks dusted light red. “Sometime after Sasuke went rogue, I stopped and thought about everything… I really evaluated why I liked him in the first place. I mean, he was attractive, but I don’t think I liked him. I think I wanted to like him because everyone else did. And even if I did like him, what he did to Naruto and Sakura by leaving- and to the village- tainted that. He really hurt everyone, and that was after years of ignoring me. He didn’t owe me anything, sure, but he could’ve been nicer about it… And I didn’t like you back then either but a year or two passed and it sort of just… Hit one day. You may be a lazy bastard, but you’ve always tried your best to take care of Chouji and I- and everyone else- and there’s a lot that I’ve come to appreciate about you. I… I love you. I really do mean that.”

“Well, obviously I feel the same way, so…”

“You know, instead of doing all of this, you could’ve just asked me on a date,” Ino teases. “I would’ve said yes.”

“And how the hell was I supposed to know that?” Shikamaru sneers back. “It’s not like you made it obvious or anything.”

“And you did?”

“Chouji said I did.”

“He knew about all of this and didn’t tell me!? Oh, I am so going to get him when we spar tomorrow,” Ino huffs.

“Hey, if it makes you feel any better, he knew before I even told him,” Shikamaru points out. “Why don’t we eat, and then after this, we can go on a normal date? As in one that I’m actually being upfront about the purpose of?”

“Fine, but I get to pick the location this time,” Ino agrees with a large grin. “Why don’t we head to the shopping center up the street?”

At that, Shikamaru laughs and rolls his eyes.

“Sure thing, Ino.”

#naruto #naruto fanfiction #naruto shippuden #naruto shippuden fanfiction #shikamaru #ino #shikamaru nara #ino yamanaka #shikaino #choji akimichi #chouji akimichi

[b4nka1]

Hey so!! What about emotional hurt/comfort with Kakashi? Hurt reader in particular? Maybe if you don't mind specifics they have an issue with being told they break everything they touch their whole life and he comforts them about it? Also do you do nonbinary/trans readers

hi love! i didn't exactly get what you meant by break but i will write it metaphorically AND literally here. and i'm sorry, i have very less experience with nonbinary or trans readers to write in their pov. i write for gender neutral readers, and i'd be glad if someone explained trans and nonbinary terms to me so that i can write more content for all my readers <3

warnings: angst, major character death!

again, you lost another comrade. a close one. you worked with her for quite a long time and you both grew attached to each other, but she ended up doing while coming across an akatsuki member.

with slumped shoulders, red, teary eyes and a heavy heart you went back home, dropping onto your bed the moment you stepped in. burying your face in your hands, you cried out, loud. your sobs echoed through the entire room, your hitai-ate coming off lose and falling onto the bed.

that put you under depression. it was always your comrades who died in the hands of akatsuki. your touch was considered lethal at this point, no one wanted to work with you anymore. whoever did, ended up dead in the hands of the akatsuki.

the loud sobs turned into quiet whimpers. soon the atmosphere fell quiet, and you took the hitae-ate into your hand, and stared at the konohagakure's symbol on it. maybe you weren't fit to be a ninja. maybe you were meant to be just a civilian. maybe you weren't meant to be born into the namikaze clan. maybe your uncle minato trained you for nothing.

a million thoughts ran through your head, and you hadn't noticed when the window opened and an intruder walked in.

"yo!" a voice echoed and you screamed, not sensing the sudden presence. kakashi put his hands up in defence, and you calmed a little.

"what are you doing here?" you asked him with a slight frown in your voice. "i just came to check up on you- wait, have you been crying?" he asked with concern, stepping closer to you, which only made you step back.

he stepped closer, and you stepped back, till your back hit the wall, and till his figure was towering over you. "darling," he started, pressing his forehead close to yours and you swore your heart jumped a beat and pink flushing your cheeks and ears.

"please don't touch me...i don't want anything to happen to you as well...all my comrades died in the hands of akatsuki, even asuma. i wouldn't be able to handle the pain of another comrade of mine dying..." you trailed off, making kakashi scrunch his brows in worry.

kakashi was your best friend, a comrade, nothing more. why was he calling you darling? why was he so close to you? why are your foreheads touching? before anymore questions ran through your head, he gently cupped your cheek.

"it's not like that. what makes you think that touching you or you touching me would kill me? it's all bullshit, the villagers have a sick mind if they think that. death is in everyone's fate. it comes when it wants to. it is unstoppable. your touch in fact, does things to my heart..." he trailed off, holding your chin in his hands.

your hands raised, wanting to cup his cheeks, but you stopped midway, shaking your head and pulling them away. "kakashi, these hands have only held weapons, killed numerous people, have been stained with blood that isn't mine. and you're too precious to me to be held by these filth of hands...please, no." you looked down, tears building up in your eyes again.

kakashi sighed, taking your hands in his and he pressed your palms to his cheeks. "not to be selfish, but if anything, they're made to hold me, convince me that you're there with me. convince you that you're not alone and you have me." he smiled, kissing your palm softly.

the second day after the incident, there kakashi laid, half his body buried under the ground as he ran out of chakra while protecting choji, dead. you saw this just before you heard your neck being snapped by pain, leading you into darkness forever with your beloved.

#naruto #kakashi #hatake kakashi #kakashi hatake #kakashi x reader #kakashi angst #angst #naruto shippuden

[wind-becomes-lightning]

We looked like Giants (6)

back by unpopular demand: it is i.

Thank you to @butter–peanut for beta reading.

Sayuri looks like this.

Hatake Kakashi x OC

Rated E (eventual smut)

7231 words.

On the cusp of an all out war between the big villages and the Akatsuki Uchiha Sayuri suddenly returns to her hometown of Konoha after over ten years of absence. Her return throws Kakashis life out of order. Or- If Hatake Kakashi had a ryo for everytime a childhood friend he thought was dead came back to life he would have two ryo, which isn’t much, but it is weird that it happened twice.

6. Akatsuki

The day was especially moody, which was a sentence someone could only say about Kirigakure, Sayuri supposed, because she didn’t know any other place that changed weather quite as drastically as this one. Located on islands and by the sea, it could change in the blink of an eye. When she was younger she had hated it, but she had since come around to appreciate the weather for their similarities. Both Sayuri and the wind could never decide if they wanted to stay or to go. This particular morning it had been especially full of mist and Sayuri had stood on the cliffs not far from the big lighthouse to make sure the delegation from the Land of Grass made it safely to land. Now that Kiri was no longer on permanent lockdown, many villages big and small were interested in trading information for information. The new Mizukage, Sayuri’sl friend Mei, was keen to connect to the rest of the world.  Around noon it had started raining, a full downpour as Sayuri ran from her apartment to the main street in hopes to find something decent to eat. She was completely drenched by the time she arrived and felt bad for dripping water all over their floor. After a delicious meal with her favourite ice cream as dessert she had left the restaurant only to find the wind had quietened and the sun had come out, now beaming down light  so strongly that she felt hot in her clothes. Moody weather, the people passing murmured. She had been summoned to the Mizukage for a meeting and she was going, though her interest in the matter was very limited. “You should come,” Mei had said. “Sit by my side, support me,” with that soft hand touch of hers that got Sayuri to do everything if Mei would only ask. Mei had been Mizukage for a while now, and the excuse of her being nervous about her job was no longer fully believable. Still, she went, because Mei was her friend, and there was an off chance she might actually need help.

////////

The worst thing was that the Icha Icha book wasn’t bad. It wasn’t great, and it definitely wasn’t a linguistic masterpiece, but it wasn’t bad. Sayuri stayed up nights reading it so she wasn’t seen reading it during the day. She couldn’t give Kakashi the satisfaction of knowing she actually, possibly, liked his disgusting smut novel. But the storyline was honestly captivating and the main characters yearning for each other was heartwrenching. Yes, there was some sex in it, but it was usually very sweet and devoted. It tugged at her heartstrings more than it should have. In summary, it pissed Sayuri off that Kakashi had been correct to recommend it. She was done with book one and really wanted to buy the second book to continue the story, but her fear of Kakashi discovering her deep dark secret (her liking his favourite novel) kept her away from any bookstores. She briefly considered doing a trip to a bigger town nearby to try and purchase it, but her sudden disappearance, especially after her sweeping statement at Asuma’s wake, would not go unnoticed.  “I could steal it,” Sayuri said and put her feet on her chair. “Just break into his stupid apartment and steal it. He has so many, he wouldn’t even notice.” Kurenai put the magazine down that she had been browsing in and rolled her eyes: “Just ask him for it.” “I can't. And I won’t” Sayuri said and pouted. “He would tease me.” “Don’t act like you don’t enjoy that,” Kurenai said with a sigh. “You welcome it everytime it happens.”  Half true, Sayuri thought, but she said, “No I do not.”

[Read more on Ao3]

#fanfiction things #oc: sayuri #hatake kakashi x oc #kakashi x oc #naruto oc

[mothervvoid]

kinda massively cheating here, but for the character ask game, would you spill your thoughts on Inoichi, Asuma, and/or the not-yet-invented characters of Obimama/Obipapa? I'm feeling interested in a lot of fictional parental units in this chilis tonight

character ask game

oh god oh fuck mable what have you done--

also this is SO LONG so i am going to put it under a read more:

one aspect about them i love

Inoichi - Now this might just be my POV here, but Inoichi is super goofy at times and others he's SUPER serious. I love it. When he's with the Analysis Team right before Pain's attack, he's a no-nonsense leader. When he's interacting with Ino off work he is her silly, well-meaning dad. We love a man who can do both!

Asuma - Just how well he gets along with Ino-Shika-Cho. Like they have their moments, especially when Kishi (and Studio Perriot) wants to play up the comedy, and ESPECIALLY in the early anime, but he meshes very well with Team 10 and they mesh very well with him. He's like their older brother, or an uncle they know really well.

Obiparents - The thing about Obiparents is that they just straight up don't have characters--they're the archetypal dead parents, a picture on Obito's corkboard full of all of the people that he loves and nothing more. However, they gave us Obito, and for that I am forever in their debt.

one aspect i wish more people understood about them

I don't actually have anything for this for Asuma or Inoichi--I just can't think of anything, though I haven't really read any meta on Asuma or Inoichi so I'm not really sure how the people feel about them and if I disagree with any common fandom opinions on them.

Obiparents - Because they're the stock dead parents they don't ever really get to parent their son or have any kind of meaningful character on-screen. It is their absence that is felt more than anything.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have about this character

Inoichi - He's a single dad. We never see his wife in the manga (i think she's there in filler but i still hc he's a single dad). He just gives off those vibes. He's the only person whose ever home in most of the scenes we see with Ino in her house (or he's just not there at all and she's all alone). Single dad Inoichi ftw.

Asuma - Had he lived, Asuma would have been the kind of dad who lets his daughter put make up on him and do his hair. You walk into Mirai's room and Asuma is sitting their on the floor with her with uneven pigtails in his hair and very badly done eyeshadow. He takes her to the movies and they both wear princess dresses. She paints his nails. He is having the best time of his life.

Obiparents - Obimama is the goofy one out of the two of them, she's where Obito gets it from. Obipapa isn't super serious but he's definitely not as goofy as Obimama.

one character i love seeing them interact with

Inoichi - I unironically love seeing him interact with Ino, even if it's sparse. He's so bad at relating to her it's kind of funny. Like there's a scene in a filler episode where he asks her if she's "finally chosen between Shikamaru and Choji" and she gets so mad at him for it. Peak teenage girl behavior, and he's soooo bad at understanding it. Like yes he is Inoichi of the Leaf, famed 1/3 of Ino-Shika-Cho but he is also Ino's lame ass dad.

And like it's very obvious he loves her very much because his final words to her (and his final words EVER) are of how proud he is of her and the person she's become. Like he is her silly dad but he loves her very much and so I treasure every interaction between them that we get.

Asuma - Shikamaru. There's a scene of them laying on the grass together having a conversation and they look so comfortable with each other. Like if they looked a little more alike you could believe that was Shikamaru's uncle or even older brother.

Gee Shikamaru, how come Kishimoto let you have THREE father figures?? - Naruto probably.

Asuma just really seems to GET Shikamaru and that seeps into every single interaction they have. Asuma knows how to get him to do things even when he doesn't want to, Asuma knows how to talk to him, Asuma knows how to work with him. Their interactions are always top tier to me.

Obiparents - If they were alive I would have loved to see interactions between them and Obito, and Rin and even Kakashi. Could you imagine?? Obito inviting Rin over after school only for her to drag Kakashi along and Obito is fuming and his parents think it's hilarious and adorable.

one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more

Inoichi - I wish we saw Inoichi interact with Shikamaru and Choji. Choza has a couple interactions with Shikamaru that leads us to believe that the older generation of Ino-Shika-Cho interact fairly regularly with the younger members (altho it might just be Choza's chill vibes). Choza's wife also seems familiar with Shikamaru considering she runs up to him crying in episode 82 of Shippuden while trying to comfort HIM. I can't remember if Shikaku has had similar interactions w the rest of younger Ino-Shika-Cho so if anyone knows please let me know. I crave Ino-Shika-Cho crumbs.

Asuma - I wish we had seen more interactions between Asuma and his dad, Hiruzen. We're told that there's bad blood between the two of them but we're never really shown WHY exactly the two of them had a falling out. I know they disagreed on some things and I might just not be remembering things but we don't really see many if ANY disagreements between Asuma and his father. And Hiruzen isn't just his father--he's his Hokage! There's so much potential there for some interesting conversations/scenes and we just don't get any.

Obiparents - (if they were alive) I wish we could have seen some interactions between them and Obito. Like maybe if they were alive when he was super, SUPER young we could have seen them interacting with him and how they treated him when he was a baby/toddler. Was he a wanted child? Was he born out of obligation? These are questions we never have answered because they're dead before the story even begins.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character

Inoichi - I think Inoichi and Minato knew each other! Inoichi was the head of the Analysis Team in the Intelligence Division, I think there's a good chance he reported directly to Minato when he was Hokage.

Asuma - Since Asuma said that the Sarutobi serve as sensei to each new generation of Ino-Shika-Cho since Konoha was founded I like to think he was probably introduced to them when they were really young. He was probably sporadically in-and-out of their childhoods, like some cool older brother figure who takes them out to lunch to restaurants wayyy too nice for kids their age but he doesn't care, it just so happens that Yakinku Q became their favorite place to go so that's where he took them post mission.

Obiparents - Considering Obito is considered a bit of an outcast I think his parents were as well. Obiparents, for some reason or another, were not liked by Fugaku's parents (ie the clan head) and thus that extended to Fugaku as well. When Fugaku inherited the clan he didn't like Obiparents for one reason or another and thus that extended to not liking their son. Vicious cycle!

#ard answers #OH MY GOD THIS TOOK SO LONG #i was like 'ah yes ill come back to this tmmr' when i got abt halfway thru bcos it was like 3am #but thank u mable!! this was super fun to do!!

[happyocelot]

Hi! If you’re still taking Team 8 prompt ideas, what about an alternate timeline where they were the ones to lose their sensei? How would each person react? Thanks!

Sure! Sorry that this is late. I had COVID, then I recovered from COVID, and then I had post-COVID back pain. Actually I still have post-COVID back pain 😭😭😭 I can’t sit down for a long time. This was painful to write in many ways. 😅

***

"Kurenai-senseiii!" Kiba called out, energetically waving his hands. "Where did you go? We have a mission this week and we have to – "

He paused when he saw the lonesome figure, for once not smoking.

***

Kurenai-sensei, where did you go?

Hinata traced the name on the grave, the evening sun turning the sky a blazing red.

Red. There was so much blood, Asuma-sensei said, voice tired, numb, empty.

Kurenai-sensei, where did you go?

Hinata was forgetting her mother's voice, little by little. The curve of her smile and the warmth of her hands. It had been years and years. Hanabi sometimes argued with her, about what their mother's laugh sounded like (she got very upset indeed when Hinata told her that their mother didn't laugh much).

Every night, Hinata would make sure that she'd never forget Kurenai-sensei's voice. A few days after, Hinata took in her hands that photo. The first one that Team 8 had ever taken together. She activated her Byakugan and stared so hard at Kurenai-sensei's smile that the veins around her eyes began to hurt.

***

Kurenai-sensei, where did you go?

She wanted the name Mirai, Asuma-sensei said one evening. He still wasn't smoking. He still wasn't eating. His eyes were dead and hollow, and at that moment, Shino wished to take off his glasses and put them on Asuma-sensei's face.

Mirai, for the future.

Protecting her loved ones. That was how she fell. No, that was how she went to the Pure Land. A hero.

Once when he was twelve, Kurenai-sensei commented on his kikaichuu. She said that they were strong. That Shino's unique ability could protect Team 8. Could protect reckless Kiba and kind Hinata. Could even protect cool, calm, collected Kurenai-sensei.

She had ruffled his hair affectionately, almost like –

He was so grateful for his glasses, how dark they were, how no one could see his eyes, despite all his teammates' prodding.

They were normal eyes. They welled up with tears, just like everyone's.

***

Kurenai-sensei, where did you go?

Akamaru sniffed and sniffed around Konoha, looking for her familiar smoky scent.

He never found it again.

He kept looking anyway, even though Kiba told him it was no good.

***

Hinata was too soft and Kiba didn't approve of dogs bullying cats. Shino didn't like causing unwarranted pain.

Some villagers near the Nara clan's forest saw a cloud of birds flying around in the evening sky and a four-legged being streaked with blood. Someone caught what may have been a scream, a call for help, but who knew? It was a windy day. The passersby shrugged their shoulders, went back to their evening strolls, and never thought about the matter again.

Team 8 was a tracking team. They made sure of that.

#anon #asks #team 8 #asukure #yuuhi kurenai #sarutobi asuma #hyuuga hinata #aburame shino #inuzuka kiba

[lumitris]

┊ ┊�� ┊ . 𝒥𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓃𝑒𝓎 𝑜𝒻 𝒟𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓂𝓈 ◞ 𝖒𝖊𝖒𝖊 . ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ @supremebirb ⤸ ❛ i won’t stop killing until you kill me. ❜ haunting!hidan @ shikamaru. perhaps his chakra is a miasma rising from his grave, poisoning the soil & all that grows in it, the wells people draw their water from- sayyyy if shika tossed hidan's head back into his grave after confronting it? he just wants uppie outtie shika :/ why you gotta bury a holy man ur an idiot tbh-

It couldn't get any worse, && somehow, it kept dragging him further down this insane rabbit hole. If he were any other man, he's sure he'd of lost his mind by now; what person could deal with a HAUNTING from the past like this? A twisted and sick reminder of a chapter he'd closed years ago, back again like a bad rash.

Shikamaru couldn't tell anyone; not his friends, his team, not Naruto. No, something always stopped him, and maybe it was his own arrogance coming into play, but this was his burden to deal with. He was the one who had finished this nightmare, and he intended to keep it that way.

❝ We both know it ain't that simple. Trust me. If you could stay dead, I'd have finished this long ago. ❞

Staying in the grave was no longer an option. Jaw tightens, teeth grinding, as he tries to remain calm. Focused. The fear he'd felt when they had first met was also long gone, but, there was no getting those maddening eyes from his mind; and now, they bore into his very soul all over again.

❝ At the very least, you're no longer a threat. ❞

But his chakra... this miasma of sorts that kept polluting the surrounding area, threatening harm to the sacred deer of this forest, that was what he was most worried about. Without his partner around, he didn't have to worry about Hidan getting back up. Without a body, there wasn't much to be concerned about.

❝ This was supposed to be your grave. Any normal person would have decayed by now. You akatsuki really are something else. ❞ It wasn't a compliment, and he feels the beads of sweat drip down his forehead, his neck, and shaken his gaze. This really was a bad nightmare.

Just what would Asuma think? Even conversing with the man who killed his sensei felt wrong on so many levels.

He had his teacher's kid to think about too.

❝ If you think I'm letting you go, you'd be dead wrong. ❞

If this was his tactic, then he definitely forced Shikamaru's hand. For a guy who wasn't so bright, he could be too troublesome for his own good.

Just what was he supposed to do right now?

First, he had to calm down. Then, access the situation before him. He could still bite him, even just as a head he posed a problem. If he invested Shikamaru's blood, could he just bite his tongue off? No. Without that ritual of his, he didn't need to worry; he couldn't perform the steps required to link their bodies together. Not as he was.

Then again, it wouldn't stop him from going for his jugular.

This was a pain. Both Hidan, and his own need to settle things; to keep it his, like an infectious disease that he couldn't let spread. Had he failed, or, was this another hurdle to grow from? All the hate, and sadness, the terror ... that had all vanished. So he could stare down at the man with a stern, distant expression, one without distress, or too much strain. The weeks building up to this encounter had, however, taken it's toll on him also. Shikamaru was tired. Nightmares upon nightmares putting an unnecessary burden on the shinobi, and the fatigue was definitely visible.

❝ Say I let you out, what's to stop me from taking you straight to the Hokage. I'm sure whatever they decide for you, will be far worse then that hole you're in now. ❞

It's the sensible thing to do. So why isn't that an option he can go along with? Shikamaru's gaze narrows in thought. No, he understands why too well; it was his baggage, and his burden alone. There was no way he'd let word get out, not to Kurenai or her daughter, and not to Ino and Choji. They had to revisit this hardship already, back during the war.

It wasn't dangerous. He wasn't being reckless. Shikamaru had thought of all potential downfalls, but he couldn't see one that he couldn't handle on his own.

❝ You're making the deer restless and trying my patience. If you're planning on acting out this revenge of yours, forget it. Even if I drag you out of that hole, you're still a dead man walking. ❞

Asuma sensei, and father too ... give him strength.

He needs something to release this tension, and his hand instantly twitches to his lighter pocket. Such a pain.

#supremebirb #ℒ ╱ ˑ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ༺♥༻ ₘᵤₛₑ~ shikamaru. ◜ ⁿᵃʳᵘᵗᵒ ◞ ♛ #ℒ ╱ ˑ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ༺♥༻ ᵢₙᵦₒₓ~ shikamaru. ◜ ⁿᵃʳᵘᵗᵒ ◞ ♛ #( shikamaru screaming internally while giving the most blank expression he's SO TIRED SO DEAD ) #( 'I ?? WANT YOU TO STAY DEAD?? This is the entire point don't mock me') #( he's gonna throw your head in the ocean > : ( be someone else's problem ... ) #( wait no you might come back so I have to keep an eye on you always god dammit- ) #( shikamaru also back on his; it's my responsibility no one else be involved fiasco )

[helenarasmussen87]

Random thoughts on characters

Putting it under the cut because I have *feels* about this.

So I've gone full tilt again into Naruto because it's honestly been tumultuous for me for a long while. I got depressed and turned to the series again. Reading and writing for it and somehow Tiktok decided I really need to know about Boruto, so yeah.

I have a complicated past with Naruto. My ex was a gasligthing dick and for him, Naruto was a childish series that had no value. As did fanfiction. He basically hated that I got joy out of something so simple.

Another ex LOVED Asuma and the series and it actually helped me look at it in a more positive way. But I didn't go back until a couple of years ago and found that I loved it SO SO Much.

So now that I'm revisiting the series and I have to admit that I ignore canon and Boruto. I was expecting the couples to happen, but I have to admit that I HATE how Sakura got shit on.

Sakura should have had a brilliant character growth arc. She had so much potential to be a second Tsunade. And instead she's Sasuke's wife, patiently waiting for him and being a single mom.

I get that our man is the Shadow Hokage, but his ass can't park itself in Konoha to at least not forget his own daughter? It's like the bare minimum...And we're supposed to believe hints that this is a great love story? Uh no. It's toxic and Sakura needs to love herself.

Sakura is pushed to be the rehab for a broken man. I love Sasuke, but the last thing he needed was to get involved with a woman who loved the idea of him rather than who he could be. The man needed to be by himself and get over his grief and get his redemption done.

(I also think that Naruto and Sasuke could have helped each other in this by travelling together. Naruto is one of the few that got him and saw him. But I digress)

She deserved more than to pine for a man who needed to get his shit together. And yes, I know the books are out...And they do read like paint by the numbers bad romance novels. Having read enough of them before, I knew exactly where things were supposed to go.

And I have heard and read "Well, fifteen years can change people!" It's true that people do change to the point that they don't recognise their partners. They aren't really on the same level and they are very different people.

You can fall out of love with someone and you don't have to stay with them. I know because I married young and I eventually left. It took me moving halfway across the world and basically having a war of attrition for years to get my divorce, but I did it. And having this perspective is why I'm like "Oh honey, no."

I won't say that Sasuke abuses Sakura. I don't buy it. What I do buy is that they are toxic together and forcing a life that neither of them really want. Sasuke loves having a family. Sakura loves that she got her entry into the Uchiha clan.

(I also find it kind of weird that this guy wanted to continue his clan and only has one child? I know that he supposedly gave up the dream...Which absolutely makes no sense in regards to his character. He loved his clan. He loves his family. So why not have more kids? You supposedly love this person and you have a clan to renew...so why only one kid? Naruto had two in contrast to him.)

The other thing is that you can enter a relationship when you're so full of turmoil and trauma bond with a person...And wake up years after and see that this is not where you're supposed to be. Yet not want to change the status quo and stay. Even though it's not the life you saw when you started? Yeah. That's how these guys feel.

Also, the romance isn't organic. Asuma and Kurenai was offscreen, but we knew how much they loved and respected each other. Temari and Shikamaru also had the best romantic trajectory since it grew organically. Hell, even Minato and Kushina who are fucking DEAD got an organic love story.

(Not listing NaruHina, because they have their own issues going in, but at least they got their weird development)

The major problem was lack of development and how they kind of got smashed together. I also will take Kishimoto's assertions that they were supposed to be together always with a grain of salt. Maybe because I'm older and was socialised female, but it looks to me like the man is backtracking and keeping them together out of spite. And because he's so shitty at writing female characters.

I'm quite skeptical that he had it planned. Considering the sheer amount of planning for different story aspects and the sheer amount of emotion we get in different dynamics...Kind of hard to buy.

Compared to Fruits Basket where we got hints right away of Kyo and Tohru, Yuki and Machi...We got lukewarm hints of Sasuke feeling the same for Sakura. I mention Yuki and Machi because Yuki himself was very, very reserved and traumatised as Machi herself was, there were enough hints for everyone to go "Oooh."

With Sasuke...It was always Naruto. And Sakura.

(Kind of like me and you, and your friend...Steve)

Demon Slayer had Iguro and Mitsuri, who had hints...and got a heartbreaking scene that they both wished for something they knew wasn't going to happen. Going even further back, there was X/1999 with Kamui and Kotori.

Point is that Sakura deserved better than to be shoved into a toxic supposed happily ever after.

Sasuke also deserved better.

End musings

#musings #character meta #naruto series

[woman-child91]

Updated Plot for my upcoming Charasuke x Menma series.

Part 1

Menma is going to turn evil on his own free will. Well, sort of? He’s going to go dark when a masked man kills his parents and younger siblings (he’s going to have had 4 siblings in this series.) This masked man wanted him cause’ of the 9 Tails sealed inside of him. His parents die protecting him and his siblings were just lambs to a slaughter.

This causes Menma to sort of turn a bit like Sasuke. He’s going to swear revenge on killing that monster who massacred his entire family right before his eyes. But, I’m still not sure if he’s going to be going to Orochimaru for power or joining The Akatsuki.

Charasuke/Sasuke, is his best friend and he’s totally different than canon Sasuke. (He’s carefree, lazy, soft/compassionate, naïve and a womanizer. He also still has his Dad, Mom and Itachi in this series. The massacre didn’t happen. Although, I might kill off his parents too for dramatic effect. I’m not sure, yet.)

When Menma leaves the village and goes either to Orochimaru or The Akatsuki. Sakura, tries to stop him. Because, if you’ve seen Road To Ninja movie/filler arc you know she loves Menma in this AU. So she tries to stop him. Menma is actually a lot crueler than canon Sasuke was and he doesn’t knock her out. He actually tries to kill her. Because, he’s been giving in to the darkness in his heart. But, a bunch of Jōnin hear the commotion and get there just in time to save Sakura. Menma fights off the Jōnin and kills them. (Some Jōnin are pretty weak from what I’ve seen and I think Menma could easily kill them. I mean, he does take after Minato in personality and skills. He’s a prodigy too. So yeah.)

After he kills them. He starts walking away from the Hidden Leaf village. Tsunade is quickly informed by ANBU of what happened. She tells Teams Kurenai, Guy, Asuma and Kakashi of what happened. She says that Menma is now a Rogue ninja and no longer has any connections with the Hidden Leaf. She forbids anyone from chasing after him. But, a cocky and teasing Charasuke tells her that that’s just what he’ll do. She forbids him and orders him to not go. Charasuke is seriously angry (a rare occurrence but, it happens) at this and goes back to his house.

Itachi who can see how much suffering this situation is causing his little brother. Because, he knows how precious Menma is to him. Well, he asks him, "Why don’t you just go? I’ll pretend I didn’t notice you sneaking out of the house." Charasuke smiles at his big brother and thanks him.

Then, he sneaks out and catches up to Menma. He tries to talk him out of running away. He promises him that he could persuade his Dad of working something out with the Uchiha Police Force. Maybe he could be put under house arrest or something? Menma just laughs at him and tells him that he isn’t going back. Because, he’s realized that worrying about other people makes you weak. His parents worried about him and where did that get them? They’re dead. They’re dead and never coming back. You should only worry about yourself. You should love only yourself. If you love only yourself. You won’t ever have to suffer the loss of others. He’ll never love again. He won’t ever have his heart broken. He lost his Mom, Dad, brothers and sisters. Charasuke tells him that he shouldn’t close his heart. It’s not what his family would’ve wanted. It’s like if he’s desecrating them. It’s like if their sacrifices were in vain. Menma gets furious at Charasuke’s words and asks him, "What could a pampered and spoiled brat like you possibly understand, huh? How could you possibly know what I’m feeling right now? You still have a Dad, Mom and brother! You’ve never lost anything in your pathetic life! How would you feel if someone just came out of the blue and killed all of them right in front of you? While you could do nothing to stop them and… how would you feel if you knew that they all died because of you?!" Charasuke hugs Menma and tries to comfort him with soothing words. But, this just irritates Menma and he punches him. He mocks Charasuke and tells him, "Maybe if you spent a little less time hitting on girls and a little more time training with Fugaku or Itachi you could actually force me to stay. But, you’re no match for me. What could the shame of the great and powerful Uchiha clan possibly do? You’ve always been a joke! You don’t like fighting and don’t like hurting people. Are you even a real Uchiha?" While it’s true that Charasuke may be an extremely compassionate person who avoids violence. He’s still an Uchiha and like every Uchiha. He’s extremely prideful about his lineage and superior visual prowess. So he gets really angry and uses his Sharingan. (I’ve read in Wikipedia and seen in video games that Charasuke has the same abilities as canon Sasuke. So he’s got the Sharingan.) to actually fight Menma. He tells him, "Living in a constant cycle of hate. That’s no way to live, Menma. I’ll stop you. Even if I have to put you under a genjutsu and drag you back to the village if I must!"

The two have their fight and Charasuke proves to be a rather tough opponent. Menma thought he was a weakling. But, he guesses he must have been training more than usual. But, when Charasuke and Menma deliver their final attacks. Rasengan VS Chidori. Charasuke doesn’t have the heart to go through with it and stops the chidori (let’s say it’s actually possible). But, Menma doesn’t stop the Rasengan and hurts him pretty badly. (Of course, he doesn’t kill him!)

Menma (who has always had feelings for Charasuke. But, he’s always tried to ignore them.) looks at Charasuke’s unconscious body one last time before he smiles sadly at him and tells him. "I’m sorry. But, if I stayed with you. I wouldn’t be able to keep the promise I made to myself of not letting anyone into my heart ever again. Goodbye, my idiot."

Menma’s leaving changes Charasuke drastically! No, he doesn’t go evil like his counterpart. He just gives up on being a womanizer. He’s got no time for girls. He’s too busy obsessing over how he’s going to get his "best friend" back. So he’s now become rather dedicated in his training and is always asking his Dad, Shisui and Itachi to train him. Because, he’s obsessed with getting stronger and bringing back Menma. He wants to be a challenge worthy of him. He’s also no longer that bright or cheerful. He’s mostly sad and quiet. He’s also become a bit of an idealist who believes, on breaking Menma’s cycle of hatred. "I’ll create a world with no hatred, no violence, no wars. I’ll create a world of only peace and love. A world where you’ll learn to be happy again. No matter what it costs me."

#charasuke x menma #sasuke x naruto #sort of? #sasuke uchiha #naruto uzumaki #charasuke uchiha #menma uzumaki #menma namikaze #evil naruto #the masked man is going to be madara #because there’s no one else strong enough to takes down my baby minato when he’s at full power or Kushina when she’s in tail beast mode #sasunaru

[shinobiguide]

Jump Festa 2009

Original by Vered from NarutoFan

Archive in case original site ever deleted

Translations by Kumanri

{Note} Some of the parts may just be the fan's opinion/feelings and not of Kishi's.

Stage 1

Quote:​

井上さんになんで殺したの？お願いしますよ～って土下座され、キッシーも土下座返ししてふざけ てた後。

で、死んでないとは断定してないけど、最後まで見てもらわないとわからない的な会話からカカシは死んでない かな、と。

カカシは生きてるみたいな言い回しだな岸本さん

ついでにジライヤも死んでなさげに感じた。ただペインになってんだろうな。

最近、よく死んでます的な会話から、いや最後までみてもらわないとわからないんでとか言ってた 。

あ、たしかに。ジライヤはけじめついたみたいなこと言ってましたね。

一部のナルト描けなくなってる発言は悲しかった

絵として描けないってことみたいでした

サスケは特になかったかな。今年は10周年で話が盛り上がっていきますって言ってました。

また明日もレポします。ちなみにキミマロのときのとんでもない影分身のシーンが苦労したからって理由でお気 に入りらしいです。なんか肩の力抜けすぎ岸本さんて感じだなあ。でもそこが岸本さんのいいところなんだよな 。素朴だし。

人は昨年に比べて多かったですね。。さっきのキミマロのシーンの話で言うと、逆にアスマの死でのシカマルの 涙、ガアラ蘇生シーンはあまり思い入れはないとか。涙した俺負け組。。ジライヤは声優になんで死なせたのっ て責められ若干後悔している模様。

Quote:​

もうレポ必���ないかな？

既出覚悟で書いてみる

・カカシの死は明言せず。どうなるかわからない。だから最後まで読んでほしい

・自来也は自分の中でケジメをつけてる。それが42巻の表紙。

　お亡くなりとは言ったが、曖昧に言葉を濁す。

・イタチも自来也同様お亡くなりになっている。

・「何で自来也殺しちゃったんだろう(苦笑)ね、いいキャラだったのに(苦笑)」

・「最近確かにキャラ殺しすぎですよね(笑)」

・キッシー的に頑張った回はナルトvs君麻呂。

　理由は影分身を書くのが大変だったから。

　でも票（アンケ？）は良くなかったらしい。

・色んな蛙を描くのが好き。一部のナルトはもう描けない。蛇はウロコが面倒臭い。

・10周年ということで、集英社を始め、色んな企画が予定されている。

　キッシーもこれまで以上にやる気を出して描くので面白くなるはず。

・「長く続ける気はないんです(笑)

　　まぁ毎年言っていますが、佳境なので飛ばしていきたいと思ってます。

　　最後までお付き合い下さい」

といった感じ。

Quote:​

流れは

自己紹介

→10周年記念ナルト名シーンベスト10発表

→声優4人が選んだベストシーンをキッシーが当てるクイズ

→名シーン3位以上は確か生アフレコ

（ペインvs自来也、イタチvsサスケ、ナルトvsサスケ）

→岸本に質問とか少し話

→うずまき大巻5巻の表紙公開

→何か宣伝

→それぞれまとめておしまい

こんなんかな

http://p.pita.st/?m=orjpirv2

Quote:​

そういえば、井上さん（カカシ役）が選んだ好きなシーンの、

「カカシの弱点をナルトとサクラが暴く」ってので

「ネーム力なくてごめんなさい」ってキッシー言ってた。

あのカカシがイチャタクの内容聞きたくないから

目をつぶって鈴とられちゃうやつね

あとはカカシ・イタチ登場時の黄色い声援がやばすぎたｗｗｗ

カカシなんて絵出ただけでｗｗｗ

ペインに対する

「片や大きな陽動をしながら、影では探索か」

みたい台詞を言ったときは耳やばかったｗｗｗ

Quote:​

mixiから転載

これって最初は「うずまきなると」のフルネームだった気がするんだが

Quote:

"Why (someone) was killed, please let us know," was put forth to Inoue san as he sat down and Kishi also returned to his seat after making some jokes.

From the conversation, could not conclude whether (Kakashi) is still alive and (the reader) has to read to the end to find out if Kakashi is dead or alive.

Kishimoto san makes it sound like Kakashi is still alive.

He also expressed his sympathy over Jiraiya's death. But he (Jiraiya) probably might turn into Pain.

The conversation moved from the recent mounting character deaths to "you can't tell until you read to the end".

Well, that's true. He made it clear for Jiraiya's case.

I'm sad about the part which he said he couldn't draw one part of the Naruto manga.

I wanted to see the pictures of those stuff he couldn't draw.

Nothing particular about Sasuke. There were loads of topics about the 10th anniversary for this year.

I'll give more reports tomorrow. Also, I like the comment made about the scene showing the incredible Kage Bunshin technique against Kimimaro, being a pain to draw. That sounds like Kishimoto san had strained his back too much. But that's just the thing that makes Kishimoto san great. (Reflects also) his humility/simplicity.

The crowd is much bigger compared to the previous year.... Mention given on the Kimimaro scene as said earlier, but on the other hand, nothing on Shikamaru's tears when Asuma died nor the scene of Gaara's revival. I'm a crying loser... The voice actor/s asked why Jiraiya was killed off and there was a small sign of regret shown on (Kishi's) face.

Quote:​

A report is not needed by now right?

I'll write down what I can remember.

- Kakashi's death is not being addressed clearly. What will happen is not known. Hence it's better to read till the end.

- Jiraiya had drawn the conclusion for himself. This can be seen in Vol 42's front cover. Though it's called "death", it was mentioned in a less direct manner.

- "Why was Jiraiya killed?" <bitter smile>, "He was such a good character." <bitter smile>

- "You've been killing too many characters lately." <laughs>

- The time when Kishimoto drew in the most diligent Kishimoto-style was during Naruto vs Kimimaro. The reason being, the Kagebunshin scene was a huge task to draw. However, (that scene) didn't seem quite well-received according to the popularity voting results.

- He likes to draw all kinds of frogs. He won't be drawing one part of Naruto. Snake scales is troublesome (to draw).

- Shueisha and various companies have plans for the 10th Anniversary. Kishimoto is very inspired thus to draw better so it can be expected that the manga will get more interesting

- "I've no intention to continue this (series) over a long period of time" <laughs> Well, though this is said every year, right now is the best part of the story which I want to bring forth. Do stay tune with the series till the end."

Something like that.

Quote:​

Flow (of the entire event)

Self-introduction

- Revealing the best 10 scenes for Naruto's 10th Anniversary Commemoration

- Quizzing Kishi on the best scenes chosen by 4 of the voice actors

- Showing the raw postrecording of the 3 famous scenes (Pain vs Jiraiya, Itachi vs Sasuke, Naruto vs Sasuke)

- Q & A session with Kishimoto

- Official revealing of the cover of the 5th Uzumaki Daiken (Kumanri: this is like a compilation of the manga volumes into 1 big book)

- Some promotional activities

- Concluding business

Something like that

Quote:​

Come to think of it, Inoue san (Kakashi's voice actor) chose his favourite scene as "Naruto and Sakura exposing Kakashi's weakness"; Kishi said, "I'm bad at guessing, very sorry".

That's the scene where Kakashi closed his eyes because he did not want to hear the details in Icha Icha Tactics, hence the bells were taken from him.

After that, the shriekings that greeted Kakashi and Itachi when they arrived on stage was really terrific. LOL

<omit sentence here, not sure how to explain this... ^_^;>

When Kakashi said, "You use such a big diversionary tactic, but you're actually finding something in secret aren't you?" to Pain, (the response from the floor) blew my ears away. LOL

The last quote (given by Vered which I didn't quote) shows the first time the name "Uzumaki Naruto" written in full in the series.

Stage 2

]■こんな新キャラはいかが？

井上さん、竹内さん、杉山さん、中村さん、小杉さんがそれぞれ事前に描いたイラストを発表

キッシーが前もってキャラを選んで描いたものを発表

竹内さんの木の葉の歌姫

杉山さんの海坊主みたいなオバケ(笑)

キッシー絵だとまともに見える不思議ｗｗ

■木の葉の名脇役は誰だ！？

1はたけカカシ

2大蛇丸(くじらさんメッセージ)

3綱手(ゲスト勝生さん)

4自来也

5うちはイタチ

6うちはマダラ

7アスマ・シカマル(ゲスト小杉さん)

8ヤマト

9我愛羅

10うみのイルカ

申し訳ない

4～7順番が全然違うかもしれん

誰か訂正よろしく

NARUTOがこの先どれだけ続くか分からないから何とも言えないが、今後、アスマの子供(性別は決めてい ない)が生まれたりシカマルが活躍したりするかも

綱手(対ペイン?)でしわしわの本来の姿を明かすか悩んでいる

ビジュアル的に引かれると思うから多分描かない

来年10周年なので色々やると思います、気合い入れて描くのでこれからもNARUTOをよろし くお願いしま す　byキッシー

いつも通りのキッシーでした

■こんな新キャラはいかが？

What is the new character like?

井上さん、竹内さん、杉山さん、中村さん、小杉さんがそれぞれ事前に描いたイラストを発表

Inoue san's, Takeuchi san's, Sugiyama san's, Nakamura san's, and Kosugi san's past portrayals of their respective characters were shown during Jump Fest in the form of illustrations.

キッシーが前もってキャラを選んで描いたものを発表

The character that Kishi has chosen to draw was also announced.

竹内さんの木の葉の歌姫

Takeuchi san is the songstress of Konoha. (Naruto's VA)

杉山さんの海坊主みたいなオバケ(笑)

Sugiyama san is like a green sea turtle monster(laughs) (Sasuke's VA)

キッシー絵だとまともに見える不思議

It is amazing to see Kishi's drawings in person.

■木の葉の名脇役は誰だ！？

Who are the best supporting characters from Konoha!?

1 Hatake Kakashi

2 Orochimaru

3 Tsunade

4 Jiraiya

5 Uchiha Itachi

6 Uchiha Madara

7 Asuma & Shikamaru (chocy: I think it's a tie)

8 Yamato

9 Gaara (chocy: the title mentioned Konoha though...)

10 Umino Iruka

申し訳ない

Sorry

4～7順番が全然違うかもしれん

The order may be wrong for 4-7

誰か訂正よろしく

Someone please correct this list if I am wrong.

ナルトがこの先どれだけ続くか分からないから何とも言えないが、

Nobody knows for how long the series will continue.

今後、

The future.

アスマの子供(性別は決めていない)が生まれたりシカマルが活躍したりするかも

When Asuma's child (his child's gender has not been decided) is born, will Shikamaru play an active role in bringing him/her up?

綱手(対ペイン?)でしわしわの本来の姿を明かすか悩んでいる

Will Tsunade's original wrinkly appearance be revealed when she deals with Pain?

ビジュアル的に引かれると思うから多分描かない

Don't really know how to translate this but it is not really important. Something about being reluctant to draw Tsunade's original appearance.

来年10周年なので色々やると思います、

I think because next year is the 10th anniversary that is why they seem to be doing everything and anything.

気合い入れて描くのでこれからもNARUTOをよろしくお願いしますbyKishi

いつも通りのキッシーでした

Kishi thanked the crowd for supporting Naruto all these years.

・アスマと紅の子供は女の子にしようかと考えてるがまだ曖昧

　その子供が出てくるかどうかもまだ曖昧っぽい

・綱手のセリフは、声優さんの声を聞いてから普通の丸い吹き出しじゃなく

　ギザギザの多い吹き出しで書くよう意識するようになった

・綱手が酒好きなのに最近飲んでないのは少年誌なので止められてるため

　背表紙の絵でも最初は酒飲んでる絵を描いてたが止められた

　ほんとはタバコもダメ

・イルカが名脇役10位なのは意外でもっと上に行くと思っていた

・ヤマトがランクインしていたのが意外で、入らないと思っていた

　岸本は気に入って描いてたが、「このキャラは地味だけど重要キャラですか」と

　アニメスタッフに訊かれたらしい（重要キャラならいい声優さんを当てるから）

[nekisui]

Anko: *looking at sakuino and sns on a double date* Why say "I love you" when you can say "you're my rival" tho

Kakashi: hm

[Later]

Kakashi: Gai

Gai: yes?

Kakashi: you're my rival.

#kakagai #kakagai incorrect quotes #kakashi hatake #maito gai #might guy #no bc anko is right #i wanted to put asuma but he dead #cries

[mokutone]

What are your opinions about the Third? Do you like him? Do you hate him? Do you just not give a shit about him lmao?

oooh thank you for the question... i would say i'm interested in him.

ough.

obviously morally he's abhorrent, and when watching his segments of the anime, i am frequently saying "jesus christ, this fucking idiot" and "i hate him" but, i am interested in him.

i like thinking about him because he's one of the few very villain characters in naruto who is both: 1) interesting, and 2) NOT coded as (or an outright) sex offender, as far as i can remember. (He does, unfortunately, have some creepy tendencies, however.) [edited for clarity]

It's no secret on this blog that I don't really find any of the akatsuki interesting at all. Orochimaru makes me furious. Danzō contributes some very compelling things to the narrative, but he himself is incredibly boring as a character...kabuto just makes me sad...i don't really know madara? or care about him at this point? Haku and zabuza were great but they also have been dead for like, ever.

Hiruzen is an absolutely heinous little man for sure, but the gaps in his character are interesting. I became immediately curious after i saw him pull out a fucking crystal ball, and then mention that, acting on the commands of the fourth hokage before him, he was sending anbu after anyone who mentioned the nine-tailed fox.

So, old man that everyone in the village except for naruto and his actual grandson seems to see as their respectable grandfather. Who also runs a surveillance state, of which a main purpose seems to be isolating the son of his predecessor. Does he understand that? Is he stupid?

Then, there's his relationship with the sannin. we never really see any of them interact with him in the present of the naruto narrative except for orochimaru, who just fuuuuuucking hates this guy. He thinks that his relationship with orochimaru was close, he considers himself tolerant and even affectionate towards orochimaru—clearly, orochimaru has a different perspective on that.

as far as I can remember, we don't see jiraiya or tsunade ever talk about wanting to go visit hiruzen, or talk to him. They don't seem to miss him when he's not around. At his funeral, we see jiraiya standing near a puddle, arms crossed. Does he miss Hiruzen? He never seems to talk about the old man.

Apparently he put one of his kids into anbu, and the other one, Asuma, kinda hated Hiruzen for a long time there.

The fact that nobody who was close to him seems like they can stand to be around him, through this reading of canon, is kind of a fascinating detail to me, especially since you have to juxtapose that with the other canon detail of everyone at his funeral kind of implying that they all think that he was like a grandfather to them.

on top of that, there's his relationship to danzō—danzō considered him a threat and a rival, but hiruzen didn't seem to hold danzō in the same regard lol. i don't even think he ever thought danzō was in his league...but at the same time, he seems to have some sort of weird protective feeling for danzō, because he routinely enables and allows danzō to do things like kidnap children, possibly frequently from konoha itself. and also make attempts on hiruzen's own life.

he seems to feel responsible for a lot of ills, but his responsibility doesn't seem to make the problems better. For both orochimaru and danzō, he just kind of enables them.

for naruto, he unquestioningly takes the 4ths wishes t heart, and actively creates a situation where naruto is as isolated as possible, barring iruka's interference.

Then, most meaty of all for me, there's his relationship to Tenzō (as Tenzō was not Yamato under his reign) Tenzō is essentially the product of two of Hiruzen's greatest mistakes, Orochimaru and Danzō. He's attatched, by his hashirama genes, to the senju family, to which tsunade his student, and tobirama, his teacher, both belonged.

and yet still, despite all this being evident to him the moment Kakashi tells him that this kid has the mokuton, he refuses to lift a finger to involve himself in the fate of this kid until kakashi forces his hand.

what the hell is YAMATOS opinion on hiruzen. that is what i want to know. i have no doubt that danzō would've told kinoe that hiruzen is weak, fallible and old, softened and sentimental, empathetic to the enemy and a danger to konoha—but is that the impression that tenzō is going to get?

hiruzen would've been happy to let tenzō rot in Root, it seems, except for Kakashi's involvement. That's not a bleeding heart! Hiruzen can be cunning too, and manipulative. And, as an anbu, Tenzō is going to interact with Hiruzen at Hiruzen's most brutal, as the missions he will carry out for Hiruzen are the vilest missions Hiruzen will assign.

i think that he's an old old man with a massive crevice in the core of his being.

#yamswers #sassypenguine #hiruzen sarutobi #that read more is not kidding. u sure can read more. a lot more. unorganized hiruzen thoughts #also when i write fanfic he's just like. fun to write. shitty old man with too much power

[imaginativeamateur]

[Kakashi Hatake X Reader] The Bracelet

Pairing: Kakashi Hatake x fem!Reader

Note: This one has been in my Queue list for so long and I kept pushing it to later dates. But I thought I should just publish it today and not have to worry about rescheduling later :D Hope you’ll enjoy!

Konoha was having the annual Spring Festival…

You glanced around the area, once, twice, and sighed. Kurenai was long gone with Asuma to join their students at a game show. Anko was also off to somewhere else. Gai was, of course, performing enthusiastically on stage with his team. The Genma and Iruka’s bunch was occupied with their own booths, hosting different activities for the children. The only people free during the period were you and the Copy Ninja.

Actually, you two were not free. Kakashi was leaning against a tree, his focus fixed on Icha Icha. And your mind was busied with the reward offered at Shizune’s booth. It was a bracelet, similar to the one your mother gave you before she passed away, the one that you lost after the Third Shinobi War. Looking at it from afar brought old memories back to you as you smiled to assuage the agony, it was a long time ago. You sighed and looked at the Copy Ninja again before turning your attention back to Shizune. And her booth happened to be called “Couple’s Obstacle Course”.

You hesitantly approached the silver-haired and looked away several times before speaking up, “Hey, Kakashi.”

He peered up from his book, “Hey Y/N, not joining the festival?”

“Well, I’m planning to,” you stuttered, “but I need your help. Just for a while.”

“I see,” Kakashi straightened his back and put his book away, “how can I help you?”

You pointed to where Shizune was standing, and his visible eye squinted to read the booth’s name. Kakashi then turned and stared at your face. You grew redder under the intensity, and you felt you were turning into jelly. You should have waited for your friend to return instead of asking Kakashi. He would never do something like this, so embarrassing. Especially when the man happened to be your ultimate crush.

“If you don’t want to,” you nervously laughed, “it’s fine—,”

“No,” he quickly interrupted, “I have nothing to do anyway, and the booth seems interesting.”

You exhaled in relief and gave him a big grin as you walked toward the station, “Thanks, Kakashi.”

“Oh hi, Y/N and Kakashi,” Shizune beamed when it was your turn, “never thought that our Y/N would get the Copy Ninja to involve himself in anything besides Icha Icha.”

You slightly chuckled but the curve on your lips suddenly fell at Shizune’s instructions, “Since it’s a couple’s activity, you guys need to show me that you are actually a couple.”

Nice. Your brows twitched as you turned to face Kakashi. But he just shrugged it off with a casual demeanor and slipped your hand in his, “What are the activities?”

The amused smirk on Shizune’s face deepened, “Good. There are three obstacles total that will tire you both physically and mentally. You will be competing with another couple.”

You had successfully stopped yourself from turning into a puddle and concentrated on the surroundings, reminding yourself to breathe, “Who are we competing with?”

“Us!” Kurenai appeared behind the stall with Asuma beside her.

You inwardly cursed. These two’s compatibility was on a different level. And as you looked at Kakashi, you could not help but sigh. How could two people, considered dead with their love lives, win another two that were in a relationship for years? But opposed to your concerning status, Kakashi looked rather composed and reserved.

“The first round will be a push-up challenge. Two people take turns to do as many push-ups as possible,” Shizune pointed her finger at the instruction board, “in five minutes.”

Four of you nodded. She continued, “The next round is quite simple. I will ask a question, and you need to write your answer on your own board. You will get one point if your answers are similar. This is to test your compatibility.”

You sweated, the bracelet now seemed out of your reach. Shizune smiled, “And the last round is Memory Matching.”

The order was determined by flipping a coin, and Kurenai and Asuma ended up having to go first. You were totally focused on their performance while the silver-haired Ninja focused on everything except your opponents. You were so immersed in analyzing their strategies that you had long forgotten that your hand was still resting in his. But the situation at Shizune’s was not so peaceful. She somehow managed to have the Godaime come, and they were pointing at you and Kakashi, snickering with smug faces. When you realized what was happening, it was too late. You hastily pulled your hand from his, and a blush crept onto your face. What a rough start.

“It’s your turn!” You heard Shizune called. Taking a big inhale with determination, you pulled Kakashi through the crowd.

The first round was not hard since you both were in a good shape. Luckily, you beat Kurenai and Asuma by merely two push-ups, panting heavily after the timer went off. The one you utterly feared was the second round.

“The first question is, ‘How many ninkens does Kakashi usually summon?’ You have five seconds!”

You smirked, this one you knew. The answer was Eight. Passed.

“How many pairs of shoes does Y/N own?” Shizune’s voice rang. And soon after, the buzzer for getting the wrong answer played its tune.

Your body gradually tensed because you two were so close to losing. Kurenai’s team only got two out of ten wrong, and you already got two out of five incorrect. Kakashi was starting to show a hint of uneasiness, too, gritting his teeth and narrowing his eye. After a while, both your bodies slid from the chairs as Kurenai cheered from the crowd, hugging Asuma beside. You lost, but it was reasonable. In fact, you two only got five out of ten wrong, which was exceptionally better than what you expected. You took a glance at the silver-haired Ninja as he stood up and fixed his green vest, Shizune shouted, “Ready for the next round?”

You did not realize a big crowd had gathered around the booth at this time, cheering, and you gulped down your agitation. Kakashi turned and insisted, “You really want to win this game?”

This was the last round end the competition. It was currently a draw, whoever won the final round would win the reward. The bracelet. You nodded and realized what he was going to do. Kakashi lifted his headband to reveal his crimson Sharingan and both of you smirked. That was it.

With his Sharingan activated, the Copy Ninja easily matched the cards within mere seconds, earning you two the victory you desired. You eagerly approached Shizune at the table to retrieve the bracelet, but the Medic darkly smiled, pointing to the board, “Congratulations, Y/N and Kakashi. Don’t forget the final step to claim your reward.”

You ogled at the board, the phrase “With a true kiss, you will have our limited bracelet” was being registered into your mind. No, this was not initially on the board. You turned to look at Kurenai, but she instead, gave you an approving nod, “You two really suit each other.”

No way. You opened your mouth to reject the offer before leaving, but Kakashi was faster, “A kiss and Y/N will have the bracelet?”

“Of course,” Shizune stated, “be fast so I can get the next couples to join.”

His words were lightning to your ears. You turned to face him with unbelievable eyes and jolted when his face was inches away from the tip of your nose. Kakashi’s covered lips slightly brushed against yours, and you swore you could feel the soft texture underneath the fabric. The crowd broke into squeals, and Shizune screamed in excitement, with Tsunade popping in from behind. The Godaime had to rub her eyes several times to catch what was going on. Kakashi quickly stood up, took the bracelet from the table, and dragged your stiff body away from the booth.

He eventually stopped when you both reached a more secluded area. You stuttered, not able to form words as he gently lifted your hand to clasp the bracelet around your wrist. You stared at his face, then to the bracelet, “Thank you. You didn’t need to do the last step, it wasn’t on the instruct—,”

“I know,” he cut you off, and you peered at him in bewilderment. He continued, “I was aware that it was not included. Tsunade added it in later when no one was noticing.”

“Then why did—,”

He pulled you into his arms and quickly removed his mask, pressing his lips on yours. Your eyes widened at his action but soon gave in to enjoy the warmth he brought as his arms reached around your waist to force yourself closer to his chest, “You got your reward, now, I need to get mine.”

From now on, there would be another piece of memory to reminisce whenever you saw the bracelet.

------------------

Taglist: @dai-tsukki-desu​ @thenightfallingstar​ @iam-gaaras-loveintrest​ @animepickle7​

#kakashi x y/n #kakashi imagines #kakashi x reader #kakashi hatake #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi hatake x you #kakashi oneshot #kakashi x you #naruto

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Rating Dads in Naruto

Fugaku: 3/10. The emotionally distant father we all know. Did not cry when Itachi murdered everyone in their clan, did cry when Itachi got a girlfriend. Told Sasuke he was proud of him one time (but only when Itachi was busy). 

Hiruzen: 1/10. Loved Asuma, probably. We can guess. Put his other kid AND child-in-law in the Murder Corps, even though they had a baby. Not especially clear if his other child is even alive or dead??? It’s hard to be more emotionally absent than Fugaku but Hiruzen spent almost no quality time with any relative other than Konohamaru, whom he literally named Village Boy. Simultaneously everyone’s father and no one’s father. He should probably get 0 for his orphan policies but he gets 1 bc that’s a government thing not a parenting action. Had a couple of parental moments with Iruka, at least.

Shibi: 7/10, came to rescue his son in Part I. Tried to keep both Shino and Torune away from Danzo in the anime. Has solid dad vibes. -3 simply because filling your child with beetles like they’re a maraca frightens me.

Hiashi: -6/10. Cannot think of a single reason why anyone would want Hiashi as a father. Outright awful to both of his daughters, but especially Hinata. Withheld Neji’s last parental message from his father until he publicly aired their clan mess out in front of everyone. I guess he didn’t put a caged bird seal on Hanabi but if that’s your metric for success the bar is so low it’s subterranean. 

Hizashi: 5/10, wanted a better life for his son than he had. Died for Hiashi though, which is a mistake on anyone’s part. Probably should’ve given Neji that letter himself.

Choza: 8/10, spends a lot of quality time with his son, protected him, taught him jutsu, reassured him he would find love. Shamed Choji a bit for having bad ninja instincts, but to be fair, at the time, he did. The -2 is mostly for early Naruto when he is in the anti-Naruto mobs. Not a good example for the kids.

Shikaku: 6/10, kind of emotionally distant and only shows his love through board games, but there in his own awkward way when it counts. I would not throw him out at Dad-Mart. 

Inoichi: 22/10, I love his ponytail and his definition of “optimistic love” is Sakura and Ino’s relationship. Also taught his daughter a lot, but the ponytail and wlw rights are enough for me to justify my rating.

Rasa: -10/10. You know why.

Dai: 9/10. Amazing dad. Remained a genin, the safest ninja career. Instilled values of love, perseverance, positivity and self-expression in Gai. Literally died for his son. Incredible 80s energy. -1 for teaching a baby a self-destruct jutsu.

Sakumo: 7/10, maybe should’ve tried some ninja therapy, bc his death was super traumatic for Kakashi. But seemingly had a good handle on the single dad thing when Kakashi was a young boy, encouraged Kakashi to become friends with Gai, and literally waited in Ninja Purgatory for like 20 years just so he and Kakashi could have emotional closure. Get you a dad as dedicated as that. Definition of “here for a good time, not a long time.” I also like his ponytail.

Minato: 4/10, one for each minute that he was a dad. Really good at speeches and hugs but he put Giant Weapon Pet in his newborn and then was gonna avoid single parenting via death seal even before he was impaled. Bruh. I forgive him for 38% of it because he’s handsome.

Old Dads R Us (Butsuma, Tajima, Hagoromo): -12/10, they all have stanky dad energy. Butsuma and Tajima try to use their kids as spies and make them fight to the death. Hagoromo describes his kids as genius and a dunce, and then leads them to fight through multiple cycles of rebirth. I know it was like, the Ninja Middle Ages or whatever, but they could each write a book on cultivating dysfunctional family dynamics.

Kizashi: 10/10, has a questionable hairstyle and even more questionable jokes. Barely canonical, but still a better influence in Sakura’s life than almost any other biological dad on this list. Is Sasuke’s father-in-law, which is the funniest fucking dynamic I can think of. I can think of no reason to knock points off. We stan.

Iruka: 10,000/10, the reason Naruto knows what love is, and therefore why the entire Ninja world knows what love is. Spends quality time, teaches Naruto values, tries to protect him, and literally acts as his father in the wedding. Doesn’t need genetic relation to radiate Incredible Dad Energy. I love him.

#this is a joke but i'm also accepting no constructive criticism at this time #ayesha talks anime #naruto dad ratings #naruto meta #meta #nonsense #long post #naruto series #iruka umino #kizashi haruno #inoichi yamanaka #choza akimichi #rasa #hagoromo otsutsuki #butsuma senju #tajima uchiha #i'll go back and tag everyone else later lmao

[silentexplorer18]

Pen & Ink Soulmates: A Kakashi Hatake Fic

Summary: A partner, they said. Someone compatible with you, they said. Lies. Or the story in which you sneakily convince Kakashi that soulmates aren't all that bad.

Pairing: Kakashi Hatake x Female Reader

Warnings: Soulmate AU, Writing on skin, Minor Violence, Implied/Referenced Torture, Abduction, Minor Injuries, Serious Injuries, Hospitals, Angst with a Happy Ending.

Word Count: 12,100+

Note: For clarity, this fic occurs over a relatively large chunk of time, but it might make more sense to pretend Kakashi joins the ANBU in later teenage years (though we could pretend two high-level Jonin could talk with such maturity at age 13 if we wanted to!). Basically, I didn’t stress a timeline too much, but I hope you still enjoy it as much as I do! :)

Read on AO3 ▪ Masterlist

Hi, soulmate!

Soulmate?

Are you getting my messages?

Let me know if you want to talk.

Can you see the moon where you are?

I found the prettiest flowers today at the market. I wish I could draw you a picture of them.

Do you like flowers? I have a hard time picking a favorite.

You’d been trying. The whole connecting with your soulmate thing was supposed to be exciting and invigorating, but so far it had only left you with the bitter taste of defeat.

A partner, they said. Someone compatible with you, they said.

Lies.

Apparently whoever was supposed to be on the other end of your soul connection didn’t care about the messages you sent. They weren’t as eager to speak with you as you were to speak with them. At least, that’s what you told yourself. The alternative was much, much worse; a fate you weren’t willing to consider.

You had a soulmate. They just weren’t ready to talk yet.

So, you threw yourself into training. Every swift movement and taunt muscle, every hit target and victorious sparring session, all the work left you feeling strong and powerful. When your soulmate met you, maybe they’d regret taking so long when they saw how hard you’d been working, how skilled you’d become.

Thankfully, you had a sparring partner that liked to keep you on your toes. Kakashi had been training with you for about as long as you could remember; he was your closest friend and greatest ally as you worked to become a talented shinobi. Of all the people in the village, he facilitated and supported your growth more than anyone. You could rely on him for almost anything (except for being on time).

But there was one problem.

Kakashi didn’t like talking about soulmates. You couldn’t blame him. Deep emotional connections wasn’t a topic he wanted to dwell on, not after everything that had happened throughout his still-young lifetime. So you kept the conversation civil, even as your heart desperately yearned to talk to someone about your sudden fear of being alone, your deep, unrestrained terror that there was no partner to your soul, no body to receive the messages you delicately penned on the skin under your wrapped arms.

But apparently there was.

You learned that roughly a year later, after many failed attempts and more destroyed pens than you cared to admit.

The amount of times you’d tried to contact your soulmate had dwindled, both due to the lack of response and the influx in your shinobi duties. Regardless, you still took the time to try every once in a while.

Usually, your messages were sweet or silly. A few times, you’d merely asked if anyone was receiving your carefully written words, begging to know there was someone out there for you.

But every sensible person reaches their breaking point. And evidently both you and your soulmate broke in very different ways on the same day.

Good evening, soulmate. I didn’t do much today, but I can give you a run-down if you’d like.

It was a game you’d started a few months into your attempts at contact. Pretending someone was there was much, much easier than thinking about any alternative. So you tried your best to leave messages despite how much it hurt.

Staring at your wrist, you considered the scribble of the letters, the handwriting you only tried to make semi-nice now. That was your soulmate’s fault; you were past the point of a perfect first impression. But what to write today? What could entertain your soulmate, maybe even draw them out? You weren’t sure.

When the first inky letter swirled across your skin, your heart leapt into your throat, and your pen dropped from your hand. Your thoughts of what to write were quickly forgotten. There was someone. There was someone! There was someone waiting for you!

You leaned forward, hand clamped around your wrist to keep it steady as the words appeared on your skin.

You’re putting us both in danger. Stop writing to me.

Well, that certainly wasn’t what you expected.

After all the waiting, after all the time, that’s what your soulmate was willing to give you? Your jaw clenched, hand releasing your wrist so you wouldn’t inadvertently snap it. What a jerk.

How dare your soulmate assume you were incapable! How dare your soulmate treat you like nothing more than a hindrance! How dare your soulmate act like you were some worthless flower that would be trampled over by a single breeze!

You clicked your pen, hand pressing just a skosh too hard into your skin as you carved a message back to whoever that jerk was.

I can take care of myself.

The reply came a few minutes later.

Good. I don’t want you in my life. Leave me alone.

Oh.

Years of waiting for a soulmate, and the one to finally show up didn’t want anything to do with you? Great, just great.

You closed your eyes, hands shaking as you drew your knees closer to your body. Alone. You were alone. No matter who was destined to be by your side, nobody would be there. The tears burned in your eyes, but you tried to keep from shedding them. You were a shinobi. You were strong. You were… alone.

No, no you weren’t. You still had Kakashi and Kurenai. You had Asuma when he bothered to chat with you. You weren’t totally alone. You had people in your life to keep you company. Hell, you were even supposed to meet Kakashi for breakfast tomorrow!

You went over your list of friends in your head, desperately trying to drown out the nagging voice in the back of your mind whispering that the person who mattered most would never want you.

~

Kakashi was late to breakfast the next morning. Even later than usual. You idly wondered if he’d been called on an emergency mission while trying to keep your thin soup down.

The events of the night before rested at the forefront of your mind, making your stomach queasy with the memory of the harsh words.

Your soulmate had washed them off your arm by morning, but the message had already been branded in your mind. There would be no forgetting.

When Kakashi finally deigned to arrive, he looked much worse than usual. It was hardly perceptible to the untrained eye, but you knew something was wrong after so many years of friendship with Kakashi. He was even quieter than he usually was, picking at the cold soup you’d ordered for him.

It had been spur of the moment to order for the both of you, a decision brought on by being too wrapped up in your own thoughts. However, Kakashi didn’t comment on your unusual gesture.

For once, something went your way.

After your relatively brief and quiet meal, you offered to walk with Kakashi to the Hokage Tower, desperately craving the fresh air. He accepted your offer with a half-hearted nod, and you fell into step alongside him, trying to keep up with his impossibly lanky figure.

“You’ve been going to the Hokage Tower a lot lately. Is everything alright?”

Hummed, the sound still gravely from failing to use his voice all morning. “They’re pushing me up to the ANBU.”

You froze. The ANBU? One of the most elite and dangerous positions that a Leaf shinobi could accept? Your best friend—the talent, the protector, the lost child inside willing to throw his life away for the sake of his home, for the people who had left without him—an ANBU?

Kakashi stopped a few paces in front of you, casting a distasteful look over his shoulder at your expression.

“I can handle it. Stop fussing.”

With quick steps, you joined his side again, clenching your fist in embarrassment. “I’m not fussing. I just wasn’t expecting it so soon.”

“We die young as shinobi,” he murmured, continuing his walk toward the tower in the distance. Suddenly, the structure appeared to be looming rather than protecting, and a chill crawled along your spine.

Of course shinobi died young. All bodies gave out eventually, and shinobi would fight until that occurred, regardless of whether or not it was to their detriment (it almost always was). But Kakashi was the most talented shinobi you’d ever encountered. He wouldn’t die young, you hoped. He had so much left to live for, even if he couldn’t see it through the haze of his own pain and guilt.

The remaining walk to the Hokage tower was silent. And afterwards, you took flowers to the memorial stone. You prayed for the dead. And just this once, you begged them to look out for the living, too.

~

The day Kakashi joined the ANBU, you knew. The matching tattoo colored your bicep in sweeping increments, a sharp red rattling your heart within your chest. The reality of your situation washed over you like the worst kind of genjutsu.

Your best friend was your soulmate. And he didn’t want you.

The realization left you shell shocked for a few days, unable to even speak or look at Kakashi. Even without the contact, your mind couldn’t escape from him. However, you eventually managed to safeguard your heart as best as you could. You wouldn’t tell him yet; something within you couldn’t handle that risk of rejection, especially when it would come from Kakashi. But you weren’t willing to throw away the lifetime of friendship the two of you shared. So you put on a smile and met Kakashi at his favorite restaurant, just like usual.

“You haven’t been here for a few days,” he noted as you sat down, watching you intently. “Everything alright?”

You shrugged, fingers trailing down the side of your glass. “Yeah, just wasn’t feeling up to anything.”

It was a partial lie, one Kakashi could easily prod into if he wanted to. But he didn’t. He let you be. And you relished in the way the conversation eventually grew normal between the two of you, right up until he rose from the table, leaving you to pay the bill.

Everything was normal. But you cried again that night anyway.

~

Life fell back into the usual pattern after that. There were times that you could almost pretend the weight on your shoulders wasn’t there. Kakashi was away on more missions with the ANBU, so you were able to bury your head in your training and missions and pretend nothing was wrong. At least, you could pretend until a pen caught your eye.

The words on your skin had been so brutal, and you hoped they were just because of the pain Kakashi had endured. You hoped it came from a place of love rather than hatred; perhaps Kakashi’s intention was protection rather than cold-hearted rejection.

At least, that’s what you thought until you found Kakashi sparring with Gai.

You tried your hardest not to invade their privacy, not to listen to words that weren’t meant for your ears, like the good friend you were, but Kakashi’s voice was too sharp, too defensive, to not draw your attention.

“—but it’s a waste of time, Gai. Soulmates are unnecessary. Especially for people like us.”

“You’re hiding from your future, Kakashi. Wasting all your youthful days that you could be spending with the one who will love you as much as life itself!”

Another failed attack. The clang of clashing kunai.

“A soulmate could only be a liability to me. You know what kind of missions I’m being sent on.”

“They’re your soulmate, Kakashi. Soulmates are built to work together. They fill the cracks like the best kind of glue!”

Kakashi scoffed. There was another clang, the gentle zip of shuriken on the breeze.

“I’d never love them anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.”

“You’d say something so cruel—”

You turned away, unable to listen anymore. The pain pooled heavy in your gut. The message he’d written hadn’t been a reflexive, angry reaction. His beliefs were set in stone. He didn’t want you.

So, you held your chin up, resigned yourself to eternal loneliness, and pretended the whole soulmate dilemma didn’t exist.

If being Kakashi’s friend was the closest you could get, then you’d ignore the sting in your chest when you looked at him. You’d be his friend. Nothing more.

~

Your resolve lasted a few weeks.

There was whispering. There had always been whispering, but this day was much worse than usual. He’d been mocked, insulted, shamed. Openly. And aside from Gai, nobody had said a word otherwise. You couldn’t stand it, watching him mask the pain as much as he masked his own features. His feigned nonchalance couldn’t fool your perceptive eyes. You’d been watching too closely; you knew him too well.

Curled at your desk that night, you wrote a message on your wrist, scared of talking to him again but unable to leave him alone.

You’re a good person.

Hours passed before you received a response. It was curt, defensive, everything Kakashi carried to protect himself. You don’t know me.

But you did.

Although it was difficult to sleep, you tried your best not to toss and turn too much as you brooded over your feelings. Was it worth saying more? Was it worth risking the hurt, the rejection?

In the morning, you’d made your decision, especially after noticing his words had already been rinsed off your wrist.

Cleaning your own wrist, you wrote the message in your head a thousand times over, only hoping the words wouldn’t hurt you so much when they reached his skin.

You're a good person, Kakashi Hatake. I won't let you tell me otherwise.

~

Kakashi met you for lunch just like usual. You wouldn’t have found anything odd about the meeting, but he showed up on time. Apparently your message had rattled him enough to throw him completely off his rhythm.

Rather than comment on his early appearance, you just smiled as he sat down, choosing to dig into your meal. Kakashi followed suit, pulling out a book while he waited for his bowl.

Silence settled between you, and you let it. After all, you were trying to make the situation appear normal. The last thing you wanted was for him to figure out you were in on the secret that was bothering him. So, the two of you ate. You sipped your tea, glancing out at the people passing on the street until Kakashi finally broke the silence.

“My soulmate knows who I am,” he murmured, setting down his raman bowl.

You plastered on a smile, knowing you had to fake congratulations, had to fake knowing that he had, in fact, zero intentions of finding his soulmate.

“That’s so exciting, Kakashi! I’m glad you’ve finally found yours!”

He laughed dryly, scratching his neck. “It’s not quite like that.”

You tried to neutralize the way your expression dropped. Either Kakashi didn’t notice, nose stuck in his copy of Make Out Paradise, or he didn’t care. You bit your lip, brows furrowing before you could stop them. “How so?”

But you already knew the answer to that.

“I’m not talking to my soulmate,” he said curtly. “It’s not something that interests me.”

You shook your head, sighing softly. He’d never let anyone in, never let anyone close. Kakashi was too reserved for that, and you resigned yourself to the knowledge that he’d never care to change the fate he’d chosen for himself. For such a hopeless romantic, he had a terrible tendency to reject love.

“You’re so foolish, Kakashi,” you whispered, balancing the chopsticks on the rim of your bowl.

His eye snapped to your face. Though he appeared nonchalant, you could tell that he slightly bristled at your words. “You’re one to talk.”

“Mine won’t talk to me,” you pointed out sharply, eyes dropping to refold your napkin.

His expression softened minutely, but his tone stayed firm. “That isn’t what I meant. We’re shinobi, (Y/n). Love in our line of duty is fatal.”

Pursing your lips, you caught his eye again before dropping his stare. “Perhaps,” you murmured, knuckles straining in your lap. “But you can’t say it’s pleasant to live without love.”

He was silent for a moment as you both stared at anywhere but one another. Kakashi was ruminating under your words while you wallowed in the silent pain of listening to your soulmate openly deny your importance. It hurt, but you wouldn’t admit that, least of all not to his face.

Before he could speak again, Gai had clapped Kakashi on the shoulder, greeting him as warmly as ever.

You slipped out of the shop, enough money to cover both your meals pressed into the owner’s hand before either of the shinobi could realize you’d disappeared.

~

Although your conversation with Kakashi had stung deep within your chest, you appreciated the insights it gave you.

Kakashi Hatake was aware his soulmate knew his name. And he was terrified.

The fact that he’d brought it up at all was enough to tell you how jarring the event had been for him. That, and the way he responded at the mere notion of knowing his soulmate. He was like a cornered cat lashing his claws out in terror. He didn’t mean to hurt anyone, not his soulmate, not you. But in his desperation to protect himself, reinforce the walls he’d so meticulously crafted to fortify his aching heart, Kakashi Hatake was willing to scratch.

However, you weren’t willing to let it go that easily.

He was scared of having someone care for him. You were willing to start small in the hopes of changing that.

Along the curve of your inner wrist, you swirled the letters that would become the first of many.

Stay safe on your mission.

It wasn’t much, but it was a start.

~

Today is supposed to be cold. Wear an extra mask.

He didn’t. Worse yet, he chose to do the opposite. Although it was hard to tell, you knew his mask and undershirt were the spring/summer fabrics rather than the fall/winter ones.

The bastard was spiting you. Well, spiting his soulmate. So, unwittingly spiting you.

It was still irksome.

As the two of you wandered around the village, helped the farmers, and even took a leisurely stroll around the village perimeter “just in case,” you relished in the way Kakashi moved. It was obvious he was cold, regretting his unnecessary fashion stance.

But you couldn’t stand to see him cold.

He looked close to dropping to the ground for a rapid succession of push-ups just to rekindle some warmth. As smug as you were about watching him suffer, you weren't willing to let him perform a Gai for a small semblance of relief.

Swiftly, you unlooped your scarf, draping it around his neck unceremoniously. It wasn’t much, but the fabric was warm, and it would certainly help a little.

If only you knew how happy the gesture made him.

As the two of you walked back to the heart of the village, Kakashi walked a little closer to you than normal. And, for some reason, you didn’t really mind.

~

When Kakashi didn’t show up to lunch the following week, you weren’t surprised. You’d only just returned from a mission, and word of Kakashi’s travels had already graced your ears. He was heading to the Village Hidden in the Sand. For what, you weren’t sure. Some missions were still classified even for you.

Despite knowing how skilled Kakashi was, you still worried about him traveling alone through the desert.

The click of your pen hurt a little less when you clicked it now. It helped to know who your soulmate was. It helped to feel like he cared about you still, even when he so clearly loathed his soulmate.

Remember to drink some water today.

A few hours later, you were surprised to see a response scribbled across your inner wrist.

Yes.

Just one word but finally a positive one.

~

Rest when you can.

Kakashi stared at the words delicately placed on his wrist. His mission had taken longer than expected, and he was beginning to think his soulmate knew that.

Whoever they were, they must have been a shinobi like him. A high-ranking one, too, for them to determine the length of time he was supposed to be away for.

He’d been receiving one message per day. At first, it irritated him to no end. But now, he didn’t hate it quite so much, even if he often didn’t bother to reply. The messages were always harmless. Sometimes they were funny. Sometimes they were giving him advice, a little reminder meant—he assumed—to help him through the day.

While the sender certainly had the best intentions when sending the note, the message still left him irked. He was alone for this mission, and the sleeplessness and general strains of traveling had started to take a toll on him.

Only a day’s journey left until he could return home and try to shake the sand out of every nook and cranny of his backpack. Only a day’s journey left until he could sleep in a bed. Only a day’s journey left until he could go to dinner with the others. Just. One. More. Day.

He could make it. He had to.

~

Kakashi had been injured again.

The news swept through the village like a wildfire, and you showed up with two Make Out novels and a bowl of raman, nearly being knocked over by Gai’s comically large bouquet in the process.

Kakashi accepted Gai’s flowers with moderate amounts of grumbling and a few lackluster attempts to get him to leave. Eventually, he did, and it was just the two of you.

You filled the vase at his bedside with water, delicately stuffing as many of the stems as you possibly could inside the glass.

Kakashi watched you move around him, cherishing the silence. At his bedside, you unclasped your bag, pulling out the blindingly colorful books and the container of Ichiraku raman. After making sure the utensils were settled and there was a napkin, you turned back to Kakashi, just missing the warm expression on his face.

“You should rest,” you encouraged gently, “and eat up.”

His eye squinted playfully. “You fuss too much.”

You smiled, smoothing a shuriken printed blanket over the starchy hospital ones. It was yours, but it still smelled faintly of dogs and Kakashi and spice. Hopefully it would stave off some of his nightmares, having something that smelled vaguely like home.

“I fuss just enough. Now, don’t stay up too late reading. Some rest will go a long way.”

“You fuss too—” He yelped as you pinched his toe through the blanket, slinging your bag back over your shoulder.

“You’re lucky you have me as a friend.”

Kakashi’s expression softened, mind racing toward how close he’d come to death yet again. “Yeah, I am.”

He relished in the way that simple statement delighted you, watching the way your expression lit up.

“Get some rest,” you encouraged again, turning to leave him in the bright, quiet room.

As per your request, he did.

~

Although he listened to your advice, it was only marginally. In true Kakashi fashion, he’d talked his way out of the hospital after a measly two days of treatment.

His body needed more time, but Kakashi was always one to push himself.

Since the Hokage stalled sending him on another mission, something he both hated and appreciated, he occupied the following days in his normal rhythm. He trained privately, visited the memorial stone, and wandered the village nose-deep in supposedly trashy romance.

You’d caught him wandering around a few times, and even saw him lightly competing in a challenge against Gai.

The sight made your blood boil even though you knew it was Kakashi being Kakashi.

He had no sense of self-preservation, which wasn’t particularly helpful when you—his soulmate—were watching from the sidelines.

Did he even care that he could leave you all alone? No, probably not, your mind taunted. Kakashi didn’t care about soulmates; you knew that.

If only you could convince your heart not to care.

That afternoon, you let the letters curl across your wrist as you watched him do another training exercise with Gai, looking faintly more fatigued than normal.

Give yourself time to recover.

If he found your message, he didn’t care to respond.

~

Kakashi would visit the memorial stone in the morning; you knew how his routine worked.

He felt it fitting to visit them as often as he could, an apology for living the life they all should have lived.

You couldn’t blame him. You visited the stone often, too.

But you couldn’t today, not while you were traveling to the Village Hidden in the Sand with a scroll. So, you asked for a favor, scribbling on your wrist: Pray for mine, too, please.

He was starting to grow accustomed to your messages. A small part of you wondered if he kept an eye out for them. But that was silly. You were thinking about Kakashi. He probably was just reading his book when the words appeared, his wrist already in his line of sight.

At least, that’s what you told yourself.

But it still didn’t dispel your excitement when the answer scribbled across your skin a few minutes later.

Sure.

~

He’d been taking on so many missions lately, wearing himself to the bone just to be a good shinobi. A part of you wondered if he was trying to avoid thinking about anything other than his shinobi world. That hunch didn’t stop you from worrying.

Soulmate or not, Kakashi’s actions would have worried you. He looked exhausted as he shuffled through his laundry. You’d brought him takeout from his favorite restaurant to hopefully get something other than rations in his stomach before he left on his next mission.

Who knew how long it would be before he drug himself in, requested another trip, and raced off to somewhere new. You would’ve thought he was avoiding you if it weren’t for the obvious delight in his eyes when you caught up with him outside Hokage Tower.

But there was a reason he was working himself to exhaustion. Possibly long-dead memories brought back to life that he couldn’t stand thinking about. You didn’t even want to know; you just wanted him to be okay.

A week later, you saw him walking through the village gates yet again. Back again. Planning to leave again. It was always the same, just relentlessly overkill at present. He was taking on too much, and one day he would slip up and regret it. You didn’t want that.

So you stayed behind the kiosk you’d been perusing, fingers untangling the wraps around your hand. It was a simple message, but you hoped it would help snap his mind out of whatever hole he’d buried it in.

Please don’t overwork yourself.

He didn’t respond. Not a word graced your hopeful skin.

But Kakashi caught you outside one of the stores in town and asked if you wanted to meet up for dinner that night. He would be around for a while, he said, but he was too tired to cook.

Despite trying to hold on to your resolve, a small part of you couldn’t help but hope he was staying because you asked him to. It was probably wishful thinking, but you were grateful for whatever force made him stay nonetheless.

~

I believe in you.

Kakashi scoffed at the message on his arm, printed in the spot where his glove met his sleeve.

He found it after a competition with Gai. Hardly anything worth fussing over, but his soulmate had still sent him encouraging words.

Had they been watching? Had they seen the fun (though he’d never admit it) that he and Gai had been having? Had they wanted to join in?

For a long time, he’d been able to avoid thinking about his soulmate altogether. Now, though, they’d found a way to weasel into his mind with the words swirling over his skin.

He wasn’t willing to consider whether or not he enjoyed it.

~

I worry when you’re reckless.

The message shouldn’t have stung Kakashi’s heart, but somehow it did. His soulmate was watching and worrying, hearing the stories about his travels. Whoever they were, they must have been a shinobi, too.

Were they okay with forsaking love in the name of war? Could they abandon emotions for the sake of duty? Maybe. His soulmate had never directly asked to be anything more than penpals, though even that notion was quite one-sided.

But the message on his wrist betrayed his soulmate’s strength. They worried about him. They listened for the stories and understood when something went wrong.

Kakashi couldn’t help but wonder if they were reckless, too.

If he never took the chance to know them, would he care if they threw their life away as often as he’d tried to? He wasn’t sure.

~

The next Make Out novel comes out today. I reserved you a copy at the Northern bookstore. It’s less crowded.

Kakashi didn’t understand why his soulmate was being so nice to him. Not after his harsh words at the beginning, not after his sparse replies and general lack of interest. But whoever they were, they were trying, and he had to admire that.

At first, he was surprised his soulmate was not only fine with him reading erotic novels in public but also encouraging it. But, then again, his soulmate was meant to be compatible with him, right?

There would be butting heads, of course. All soulmates lost the honeymoon stage eventually. But this seemed deeper, warmer. His favorite book in a quiet shop on his day off. It was kindness. And it felt both strange and wonderful.

He vaguely regretted not doing anything for his soulmate. Though, maybe they were okay with that. Maybe they enjoyed being alone, just like he did.

Maybe if he kept lying to himself, he’d continue to enjoy it.

But crouched in a tree a few hours later, he couldn’t shake the gratitude deep in his chest. The novel was amazing. And he wouldn’t have been able to get his hands on it if it weren’t for his soulmate’s generosity.

Two words.

Thank you.

~

Kakashi had arrived home from another long mission. Although unscathed, his clothes were a mess. Dirt and mud clung to his legs, dried blood was smattered across his upper body, and a few rogue twigs and leaves stuck to him in strange places. He needed a shower. Desperately.

But something within Kakashi was restless, and he chose to wander around the village absently.

Something must have happened for him to look so dazed and unattached, but you tried to avoid asking anything direct in public.

Instead, you hopped beside him, catching his arm with the tips of your fingertips. He hummed in response.

“You just got back, right, Kakashi?”

He hummed again. “Yep.”

“Have you bought groceries?”

“No... Why?”

“A bunch of us are going to dinner tonight. You should come. It’s been a while since we’ve all been together.”

He inspected you for a long moment, and you could tell what he was thinking. The laugh bubbled in your throat before you could help yourself. “It’s Iruka’s turn to take Gai home, don’t worry.”

He stared for a moment longer before nodding slowly. “Okay.” Another small, dazed nod. “I’ll come.”

You couldn’t hide your smile as you told him the establishment and the time. That alone made Kakashi’s mood improve, though he’d never admit that aloud.

An hour later, though, he was still wandering around the city absentmindedly. So you figured his soulmate could take matters into their own hands.

Blood in your hair? Isn’t that a bit macabre?

He replied an hour later.

No.

But the next time you saw him, he was dressed in a new uniform. Not a single pristinely white hair was out of place.

If it hadn’t been for Anko talking your ear off about her last mission, you almost could’ve imagined that you and Kakashi were on a date.

It was the closest you would get, a clean vest and all.

But when Asuma blew a puff of smoke and Kakashi glared disdainfully from across the table, any hopes of romance slipped through your fingers.

You were friends. Close friends.

And you refocused on Anko’s story in the hopes of forgetting the state of your friendship with Kakashi for the span of a few minutes.

Every little glance he sent your way certainly didn’t help.

Nor did the way he offered you the last bite of his cake as a thanks for paying for his meal yet again.

Damn, you were in deep.

~

Be safe on your mission.

His reply came a few minutes later.

Yep.

Although it wasn’t much, the gesture made you smile. It seemed almost like he was waiting for your message, like he’d been checking as he and his companions wandered down the road.

You told yourself it was wishful thinking, but the word scribbled on your wrist in his handwriting warmed your heart all the same.

~

You’d forgotten. The mission had been too complex, your mind too preoccupied. You’d forgotten to write to Kakashi.

A part of you distantly wondered if he cared, if he even thought about your messages.

He’d started to reply on occasion. It was never more than a quickly scrawled, single word response, but it was still better than the total isolation he’d given you before.

You couldn’t say it was great, or that the two of you talked as soulmates. But it was relatively amicable. And that was a much better foot to get off on than the first time he’d responded to the words you’d scribbled words across your arms.

Things were okay.

And although you had a few scrapes and scratches from your mission, that had gone okay, too.

When your team settled in a clearing for the night, tent built and fire glowing, you drifted off, too exhausted to think of sending a scrabbled love message to Kakashi.

But he hadn’t forgotten about you.

Although you assumed he wasn’t paying attention, Kakashi was one of the best ninja in the Village Hidden in the Leaves. He paid attention to everything, despite his usual nonchalance.

He noticed immediately that his soulmate hadn’t written to him.

After weeks of at least one little message per day.

And he wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he was terrified. Had something happened to you? Were you injured? Could it be worse?

The idea of soulmates may have left him feeling disgruntled, but your messages had burrowed a home in his heart.

He wasn’t ready to give you or your messages up yet.

So for the first time in a long time, he wrote a real message.

You’re late. Doing okay?

As you watched over the dying flames several hours later, an early morning guard for your teammates, you stared at his words, tracing a finger over the scraggly characters.

Late.

You knew he wasn’t talking about your mission because the four of you weren’t due back for another two days. He didn’t know your identity. That only left the messages…

Was he treating this as a check-in?

You rolled your eyes, chuckling. Leave it to Kakashi to care more than he let on.

Got lost on the path of life. You?

Kakashi stared at your message. He’d been perusing his favorite bookstore for spare copies of the Make Out series’ novels, sleeve suspiciously cuffed and waiting for a reply, when the words had swirled across his skin.

And he laughed. Warmly and purely. Because you’d stolen his line.

You knew him. And maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing if you would continue to make him laugh so openly.

Surprised with himself, he clicked his pen, words scribbling across his skin before he had the chance to doubt himself.

Glad you’re alive.

It wasn’t much, but it was a start. An admission that he wasn’t as dismayed by the soulmate thing as he let on. And you arrived home from your mission absolutely beaming.

~

You were able to catch Kakashi for lunch before heading off on your next mission with Kurenai. The food was filling, and the conversation was nice. Funnily enough, he was supposed to leave for a mission with Gai the next day. No rest for the shinobi apparently.

Kakashi waved at you as you walked away, and you smiled to yourself. Even if you didn’t have your soulmate by your side, at least you still had some connection to Kakashi. Being by his side was worth the dull ache it left in your heart.

But you would be without it for the next few days. Although you and Kurenai were leaving for no more than two days, Kakashi and Gai would probably be gone most of the week. Part of you hated when Kakashi was away, but part of you enjoyed getting to write to him more often. When he was away, you could be a little less secretive as you scribbled down messages throughout your day in the village.

But, for the time being, you’d focus on the mission at hand.

It was a standard case of bandits in the woods. At least, that was what the scroll had described the mission as. However, as you and Kurenai crept through the dense forest, something felt off.

No matter how far the two of you traveled, the quiet whisper of wind in the leaves greeted you. Despite your speed and silence, you couldn’t sense any animals or hear anything suspicious. Bandits would have left campsites or trash or, hell, even footsteps. But nothing greeted your senses, not even traces of animals. These weren’t ordinary bandits.

Your suspicions were confirmed when eight people jumped from the brush, attacking with a swiftness you hadn’t anticipated. Their presences had been completely concealed.

Kurenai lept to your left, and you lept to the right, sending three shuriken through the air to hit the nearest attacker. While your attack worked slightly, you immediately had to jump again, barely catching Kurenai rushing off through the trees.

This was the failsafe plan; if you got caught, you’d separate far enough that you couldn’t catch one another in the crossfire of your attacks.

But you were outmatched. Whoever these “bandits” were, they were extremely skilled in capturing and securing enemies. One moment, you were wielding a fire jutsu. The next moment, your vision had gone dark.

~

Capture wasn’t the only thing the bandits appeared to be skilled in. Upon waking, you’d been tied to a chair with restraints stronger than you could break. The room was dark, probably somewhere underground, and you realized you had no idea how long you’d been unconscious. Was Kurenai okay? Had she been captured, too? What did these people want with you?

None of that mattered, not when the first blow had landed across your exposed side. Whatever these people wanted, you wouldn’t give it. So, you took a deep breath, clenched your teeth, and shut out the world. Your village was valuable to you. The people there mattered to you. And you’d follow your training to the letter, or you’d die trying.

~

Whether it had been hours or days of torture, you weren’t sure. All you knew was that everything hurt, and your vision was starting to go blurry. Despite that, you hadn’t relented. No matter what they threw at your body, no matter what manipulation they tried to play with your mind, you wouldn’t budge.

At the end, at least you’d make the Village Hidden in the Leaves proud.

But there was something that was missing, something you wanted to do before you died, even if it was just selfish, even if it was just a foolish whispering of your heart. You wanted to be buried somewhere your friends could visit. You wanted everyone to know about your end, to know what had happened, to never worry that you were out there somewhere.

You wanted Kakashi to find peace in your death, not guilt.

So there was a secret you had to spill.

You slid the pen from your pocket, clicking it open as you stared at your arm. Slowly, you undid the bandages, greeted once again by blank skin. Swirling the pen across your forearm, you wrote the rough coordinates of your capture on your arm. It wasn’t exact, but hopefully it would be good enough. Then, you wrote the words “urgent note” on your fingertips and wrist, hoping that would encourage him to look. Below the coordinates, you wrote: Abducted by enemies. Not relenting to torture. Getting weak. Send help if possible. Or someone to collect my body. Look at leg later. —(Y/n).

Carefully, you rewrapped your arm, moving to roll your pant leg up. Your hands were shaking, and it was hard to hold the pen, but you had to write to him.

They said the end is coming, and I'm starting to believe them. It hurts a lot. So I'm writing to you. I know you didn't want to deal with the whole soulmate thing, but I couldn't stay away. You were just too wonderful to not stand beside. I'm sorry I didn't leave you be, didn't respect your wishes. But I wanted to be a part of your life. I'm being selfish by writing to you now, but you're the one person I've always been selfish with, so I'm not going to stop at the very end. Please don’t be upset with yourself if I don’t make it.

Your eyes were watering now, vision slightly blurry. Had they drugged you, too? Or was it just the injuries?

I just want you to remember that you’re loved. That I love you. That you deserve to be loved. Please don’t forget that when I’m gone.

Whatever else you wanted to write would not be written. Quietly, the pen clattered out of your hand, and your head slumped forward.

Time was up.

~

Your vision was blurry when your eyes finally blinked open. You were cold, but the ache in your muscles was a reassurance that you were very much alive. Alive and in a hospital, it seemed.

There was a crinkle beside your bed, and you looked up to see Kakashi thumbing through his book.

What had… You blinked, trying to recall exactly what had happened.

There was a mission… you’d been on a mission with Kurenai… right. Then… and then... you were abducted. Yes, you could remember that now. And Kakashi… you remember thinking about Kakashi. Gosh, everything was so damn hazy. You shifted, wincing as you tried to sit up.

“Hey!” His voice was cheerful, and you blinked up at him in surprise at the warmness in his tone. “Good to see you waking up!”

How had he known you were at the hospital? Had Kurenai… Wait, no. No. Hazily, you could recall writing coordinates on your wrist. They weren’t precise, so someone must have looked for you. You couldn’t remember being found. Everything after the last interrogation was too hazy… too confusing. But Kakashi had known… maybe Kakashi had looked for you.

“You made it in time?”

He hummed, closing his book with a thump. “Pakkun found you. Once I knew what to look for, I could rely on his nose.”

You nodded groggily, reaching up to rub your eyes. The ink was still on your wrist, visible due to your unwrapped arms. You’d forgotten about—

“Kakashi, I’m so sorry about the message.” You turned to look at him, eyes wide and embarrassed. “If I knew everything would’ve been fine, then I wouldn’t have—”

His hand rose, and you stopped, heart hammering in your throat. This was it. This would be the rejection.

“I’m glad I had the opportunity to save you.”

Of course. Because he wouldn’t leave a comrade behind; that wasn’t like him.

But that wasn’t the message you were referring to.

If he wasn’t going to bring up the love message, then you wouldn’t, either. “I’m grateful,” you murmured, looking down to finally see the treatment your body had undergone. There were marks everywhere, which meant Kakashi was marked everywhere, too. Marks on the soulmate that didn’t want you…

“I appreciate you waiting,” you forced yourself to say. Maybe he’d get the message and leave you alone.

Instead, he met your awkward sidestep with bluntness. “I figured we should talk.”

Your head felt like it was spinning, and you had the slightest sensation that you were going to be in the hospital for quite a while. It would be embarrassing to be rejected here; it would be embarrassing to cry in front of the nurses.

“Not now,” you croaked, hand scrabbling to grab the invisible cup of water at the bedside. Water, sake, medicine, heck, even the flower water beside you. Anything to push the lump out of your throat. Anything to avoid thinking about Kakashi’s rejection.

You were eyeing up the vase next to you as Kakashi stood, long legs moving to fill a glass by the sink. He handed it to you, assuring your fingers were pressed around the cup before he moved away.

You sent him a grateful half-smile before you swallowed the water like a shot, desperate to drown yourself in something other than your own awkwardness.

“Feel better?”

No, you really didn’t. Your head was still spinning, stomach still queasy. Whether it was from your injuries or Kakashi’s pointed stare, you weren’t sure. “I don’t want to talk about it today. Everything—” you coughed, trying to release the tightness in your throat. “Everything hurts.”

He nodded, humming low in his throat. “I’ll go get a nurse, then.”

You nodded shakily, debating whether or not you could escape from the hospital before he came back. The ache in your side told you moving probably wasn’t the best idea.

“But before I do, I have one question.”

Your head snapped to where he stood by the door, wincing as you did so. “Yes?”

“How did you find out it was me?”

You stared at him for a minute, searching his impassive face. He was one of the best shinobi this village had ever seen, and he was still impossibly clueless sometimes. Slowly, you rolled up your sleeve, revealing a roll of gauze. It was blue, unlike the starchy white medical gauze on your sides. You could fiddle with it; the fabric belonged to you. With nimble fingers, you untied it, letting it pool below your elbow on the bed.

Kakashi stared openly at the ANBU tattoo, and you watched the pieces click into place. He hadn’t even considered what a tattoo would be like for his soulmate.

“I see,” he whispered, fingers unconsciously twitching toward his covered arm. After a moment, he shook himself from his thoughts, gaze again becoming impassive. “I’ll go get the nurses.”

“Kakashi?” you called, shocked as the words left your lips. You hadn’t meant to call out for him, not yet, anyway. But he was standing there staring like you’d held up a practice dummy, focus radiating from him in waves. You had to say something. “Thank you. For saving me… and waiting. And thank Pakkun, too?”

Kakashi’s expression softened. “I will. Now, get some rest. You look exhausted.”

Though, rest was the last thing you would come close to receiving as the doctors gave you a full evaluation. Poking, prodding, and asking questions took up most of the afternoon. Although you tried your best to focus and take in all the information you were given about your physical state, your mind continually strayed to Kakashi. Did he hate you now? Did he want you out of his life? Was he waiting for you or just waiting to ask about the whole soulmates thing? You wished you could quiet the questions swirling through your mind.

That evening, you found a message scribbled across the back of your hand. Although his handwriting was still messy, it was obvious he took his time. He wanted it to be legible.

Get well soon, (Y/n).

It was the first time your soulmate had written your name on his skin. He knew you now. There was no going back to the secretive messages and hidden assurances. Everything was out in the open; Kakashi knew exactly who you were. He knew everything.

That night, you wept.

You wept for the injuries that would bar you from upcoming missions. You wept for the bitter sense of death that had grazed your fingertips. You wept for the compassionate message on your hand. You wept for the fear of being alone again.

You wept for Kakashi and all that he meant to you.

~

Between the crying and the medical evaluations the day prior, you slept well past the time you’d typically rise. Consequently, it was well past the opening of visiting hours, too.

Kakashi arrived before you woke up and tucked himself into a corner with a book. However, he read very little. Instead, he watched the gradual rise and fall of your chest, comforted by the knowledge that you were still breathing.

When “urgent note” had appeared on his fingers, his heart had nearly stopped in his chest. When he read the message printed on his wrist, the sinking sensation had only grown. Fear consumed him more than it had ever consumed him before.

His head had spun with the realization that you were in danger, that you were his soulmate. Summoning his ninkin had happened in a blur. If he was being honest with himself, everything was a blur up until the moment he found you. That moment would live on in crystal clarity in his memory forever.

There are some moments in life too horrific to forget. Finding you unconscious on the floor of a dingy bunker, pen by your side, chest barely moving, would be one of those moments for Kakashi.

The only thing more reassuring than watching you breathe was watching your eyes blink open slowly and focus in on him. He could tell you were nervous about talking to him, and he knew why. The message still hastily scribbled on both of your thighs was more than an acknowledgement of the soulmate bond. It was an admission that you loved him, an admission that you believed in him, that you wanted to stay by his side.

It was also an admission that you believed he didn’t want to stay by your side.

He really needed to talk to you.

“Good morning,” he hummed, tucking his book back in his vest. Smiling, he moved to sit on the chair beside you, feeling it was appropriate now that you were awake. This close, he could smell the antiseptic on your skin, the overbearing flowery scent of the hospital lotion, and the faintest whiff of your shampoo still clinging to your hair despite the days it had been since your last shower.

“G’morning,” you mumbled, stretching lazily. Kakashi watched your movements, chuckling at the way you arched like a happy rabbit after a nap. It was cute and endearing, a movement Kakashi had gotten used to witnessing over the years.

Shifting the other direction, you winced, body instinctively jerking back into a ball. “Ow,” you grumbled, hand moving to put a little pressure on your side. With some effort, you managed to shift into a sitting position, still moving gingerly to somewhat satiate your aching limbs. “I thought I’d feel better today, but I guess not.”

Kakashi snorted dryly. “That’s a bit ambitious, don’t you think?”

You stopped rubbing your shoulder to stare at him. “What do you mean?”

What did he mean? Hadn’t the doctors told you? Surely they would have mentioned… Were you playing dumb or did you really not know? Kakashi stared at you for a moment, scrutinizing your confused expression, before his eyes dropped. He let out a breath, then another, trying to hide the pain blossoming in his chest.

He’d almost lost you.

“You were dying,” he said lowly, gaze fixated on his gloves. “By the time we got you back, we really thought you weren’t…” he shook his head, expression dark. “The medics thought you were already gone.”

It took a moment for you to respond. The doctors said your recovery was astronomical, that you’d been close to death, but the way Kakashi described it, so somber and broken, made the reality of the situation hit home.

You’d almost died. You’d almost lost everything you held dear.

You’d almost lost him.

Glancing back to Kakashi, you found him still lost deep within his thoughts. His expression was dark, fist clenched over his thigh, over what was intended to be your last message to him.

Carefully, you reached out and bushed a hand over his clenched fist. The action drew his attention back to you. “It wasn’t your fault,” you gently offered, stroking the back of his hand once more before pulling away. “I’m sorry you had to see me like that, but it’s okay. It wasn’t your fault.”

He huffed, scooting backward in his chair. “I should have got to you sooner! Protected you! If I’d asked, you could have sent me updates. I could have prevented you from getting hurt—”

“Will you stop with the narcissism!” you chided, wincing as you swung your feet over the edge of the bed.

He met your gaze, lone eye blinking once in surprise.

“I took the mission. I accepted the consequences of it. I knew what an infiltration would be like. I knew the chances of getting ambushed. You didn’t endanger me, Kakashi. You weren’t even supposed to be on that mission.” Your voice faded, soft and overwhelmed. “But you saved me anyway.” You ran your thumb under your eyes, catching the tears before they had a chance to fall. “So claim that. Stop… I need you to stop only claiming your failures.”

He clenched his fist, unclenched it, and nodded once. For the first time in a long time, you couldn’t read Kakashi’s body language at all. What was he feeling?

Part of you wanted to reach out and comfort him, but you didn’t. He’d made space between you for a reason. And as upsetting as it was, you were willing to honor that.

After a few minutes of silence, you plucked one of the flowers from the vase beside your bed. “Did Kurenai bring me the flowers?” You smiled, brushing a finger against the petals. “She accidentally picked my favorites.”

When you looked back up, Kakashi was staring at you again, cheek barely pinking over the edge of his mask.

He could read erotic novels in public, but you made him blush.

“Actually, I brought them.”

Freezing, you stared at him in surprise. “You did? How did you—?”

He flushed again, eyes fixing on the flowers rather than your face. “You buy pots of those every spring, but they always die because you’re out on missions. And you take daisies to the memorial stone a few times a month. You leave iris for your parents, and you bring peonies and cookies for the ANBU guards when you have meetings with the Hokage. And on the second Sunday of every month you’re both in town, you hide 100 tulips around the village for Gai to find.” When his eyes snapped back to yours, your shocked expression made him grow self conscious, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. “I’ve, uh, been paying attention.”

“Why?”

He gestured to the room, pretending to misinterpret your question. “It’s so dull in here. I thought a little decorating wouldn’t hurt.”

You snorted at that, impossibly undignified but oh so delightful.

Of course Kakashi would stall now that he was here.

But… no. He was usually blunt when it came to bad news. So why was he stumbling through the conversation like he’d never spoken to you a day in his life?

Your face shot back to him at the realization, and he arched a brow under your scrutiny. Could he like you? Could you have a chance?

“Everything okay?” he asked gently, tone much more serious than before.

You’d worried him.

Before you could respond, Gai burst into the room with the second largest bouquet you’d ever seen in your life.

“(Y/n)! I heard Kakashi was with you, so I figured I’d bring you some flowers on my way to challenge Kakashi to a shuriken throwing challenge!” He set the flowers—which balanced precariously due to their immense size—on your bedside table, giving you a dazzling smile and a thumbs up.

Kakashi sighed, “Well, Gai, I was just here talking to her—”

What if you had been interpreting Kakashi’s expressions all wrong? What if he didn’t like you? What if this was all his way of trying to stay friends? Although you hoped for something else, the fear of rejection clawed at your throat like a Shadow Strangle Jutsu. This was your chance. The chance to get out of Kakashi’s rejection. Gai was the perfect opportunity.

“You should go!” You chirped, smiling at them both.

“I… what?”

“That’s the spirit, (Y/n)! It would be a shame for Kakashi to waste his precious youth not enhancing his physical prowess!” Gai dropped to his hands, beginning to do push-ups on the floor of your room.

Ignoring the incredulous look Kakashi sent your way, you wriggled your fingers at his bag. “What volume are you on? I need something to entertain me while you lavish in your youth.”

Kakashi scoffed at your statement before fishing the Make Out Violence novel from his pouch. He dangled it in front of your face. “Is this what you’re after?”

You grinned, snatching the book from his hands. “This just so happens to be the volume I’ve been waiting for.”

Kakashi blinked in surprise, feeling his face grow warm again. “You read Make Out Paradise?”

You smiled sheepishly under his gaze, fingers tracing over the edge of the cover. “Really, it’s all your fault. It was so boring waiting in line to reserve that new edition for you. I needed something to do.”

Because that gift from his soulmate, that gift had been from you.

“And now you’re moving on to book two?”

Embarrassed but pleased, you grinned up at him. “I may have figured out why you’re so hooked on them.”

Kakashi laughed. Just a short huff, but still. Could you get any more perfect?

He was about to respond again when Gai grabbed his shoulder, already taking his ear off as he dragged Kakashi out the door.

You settled in with your—Kakashi’s— book, pleased for the reprieve but missing him all the same.

~

Delving into Make Out Violence was both a blessing and a curse. You lost track of time as you devoured the pages, and the story was so riveting that you barely thought about Kakashi. Though, every time you took a break, love—that sickening concept you didn’t even want to consider in reality—was at the forefront of your mind. So you dove into the novel again with renewed fervor, completely unaware that Kakashi had hopped through the open window. That is, until a warm voice interrupted your reading.

“Having fun?”

In surprise, you snapped the book shut, embarrassment washing over your expression. “A bit. How was the competition with Gai?”

Kakashi shrugged, dragging the chair he’d occupied that morning so he could sit directly beside your bed. “It was fine. Nothing out of the ordinary for Gai.”

“Thanks for the book,” you murmured, passing it back to him. “Maybe I can borrow another one of your copies again sometime.”

He took the novel, setting it down on the bed beside you, only to take your hand in his.

His hands were warm even through the gloves, and his fingertips traced over your skin delicately, as though afraid his touch would somehow hinder your healing.

“(Y/n), we need to talk.”

Despite only holding your hand, he could sense the way your entire body went rigid. “Kakashi, please—”

“(Y/n). I almost lost my soulmate this week.”

You bit your lip, trying to ignore the faint stinging in your eyes. He was right, you were being selfish. It wasn’t like you were the only one who had a terrible, terrifying week.

You just didn’t want to lose whatever you had with him.

Squeezing your eyes shut, you didn’t bother to mask the strain in your voice. He already knew how you felt about him. “We can be friends. Anything you want. I just… I don’t want to lose this. You. I don’t want to lose you. Even though I was being so selfish—”

“I read your message,” he said softly, gaze fixated on the bend of your wrist as your hand flexed in his own. “I’ve read it so many times,” he laughed, strained from holding onto unshed tears. “I’d get it branded on my body if I could. Parts of it, anyway.”

He shook his head, looking back to your face. He didn’t miss the shocked expression, nor did he miss the tears still frozen within your eyes. He shook his head again. “I can’t believe how lucky I’ve been, that it was you and you were here all along. And then you almost died and I…” He paused, gaze still tracing along the bend of your wrist.

“You..?” With bated breath, you watched his eyes, the pull of his lips through the mask, anything to give away what he was thinking.

“I can’t stand the thought of losing you. Not after how much you’ve grown to mean to me.”

Your heart thundered in your chest. Was he accepting you or rejecting you? Your breath shuddered over your lips, hand trying not to clench his too tightly. “What does that mean? For us?”

Kakashi leaned forward, pressing a masked kiss to your temple. “It means I want to take you for dinner when you get out of here. And—” he stood, letting go of your hand to walk toward the door. The sun was setting. Visiting hours were coming to a close. “Keep the book. I’d hate for you to be bored while I’m gone.”

With that, he vanished from your room, leaving you to wonder exactly what he wanted from you.

Tossing and turning that night, you couldn’t sleep, not with Kakashi’s words ricocheting through your mind. He cared about you, but he was putting distance between you. He was being aloof, just like the cautious jonin he was, but he was exposing vulnerable aspects of his soul to you.

Everything was so damn complicated, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep until you’d gotten an answer to the questions burning a hole in your tongue.

It took a few minutes to sit up, but clicking the pen against your wrist had become second nature to you after so many years. You just wanted to know what he was thinking.

Do you love me?

He scribbled a reply a few minutes later, and you wondered if maybe he was just as terrified as you were, if maybe he couldn’t sleep because he was thinking of you, too.

Not like you want me to, but I could. Someday soon.

The thought sent hope skittering through your chest, but you tamped it down. He hadn’t wanted you. He still probably didn’t want you. You were a liability. You were a danger to his way of life. You were—

Ink stained your hand, trickling down your arm, as you realized the pen had snapped under the strength of your palm.

Without a way to stand on your own, you stared at the drying ink, trying to think of anything other than the fear in your chest, the longing in your heart, the nervousness bubbling under the surface.

Kakashi was stuck to the wall beside your window a few minutes later, staring worriedly through the glass.

An ink stain. Of course, he’d worried something was wrong.

He’d been awake waiting for your reply.

He’d been awake because of you. For you. The thought made you dizzy.

Silently, he slipped through the window, crouching worriedly beside your bed. Whatever pretense of nonchalance he kept up during the day, he dropped it now, just for you. “Are you alright?”

You nodded once, stiffly, mind still racing with the situation. Your friendly banter from the morning disappeared, words dried up as your emotions increased tenfold.

A million thoughts rattled through your mind, but you finally settled on one. “You told Gai you couldn’t love me.”

He cocked his head, confusion furrowing his lone brow.

“You were… it was a training day. You were talking about soulmates. And you told Gai that you couldn’t love a soulmate, so it didn’t matter if you didn’t find them…”

Your eyes were watering, and you looked away until you felt the warmth of Kakashi’s fingers circling your own. His hand clung to yours with renewed fervor, though the interaction still held the same touch of softness that it always held when you were injured. Comfort. It has always been an attempt to comfort you, a silent word of compassion. But now that he knew you were his soulmate, would his gestures hold the same meaning?

His voice, coupled with a gentle tug on your hand, had you vanishing into his gaze yet again.

“Soulmates are supposed to be your other half, right?” he asked softly. “If you’re mine, then maybe the whole soulmate thing can work out.”

Even in the moonlight, you could see the blush peeking over the edge of his mask.

You’d stood beside him through thick and thin. You fussed. You took care of him. You let him take care of you. You bought books for him, and he watched your favorite movies with you. He took you out to your favorite restaurants, and you always paid for him. You trained with the strength of a hurricane, and you always kept him mentally and physically on his toes. But no matter what, you’d both been able to rely on one another. It wasn’t romantic love, not yet, but it was the closest thing Kakashi had ever experienced to romantic love. He was close to being in love with you, and the revelation of the soulmate bond had changed those feelings very little.

He’d always been on the precipice of falling in love with you. Now that he knew you and he were destined for one another, the proposition of falling didn’t seem all that terrible anymore.

“If it’s me, you think it’ll work?”

This time, he flushed fully, pinking to the edge of his hairline. “Yeah. You’re… you’re perfect for me.”

Then, it was your turn to grow bashful under his praise. Perfect. He thought this could work because you were perfect. Not perfect in general. Not perfect to him. But perfect for him, with all of your many imperfections.

He wasn’t in love with you. He wouldn’t say it yet. But he was falling, and that was impossible to ignore.

His words left you lost in another world. All this time, he was rejecting his soulmate for fear they wouldn’t truly be his other half. But you were his other half, and he could see that now. He could love you. He could see a future with you. He could—

Kakashi’s warm voice brought you back to the present, hand still gently squeezing your fingertips. “Did you hurt your hand?”

He cares.

“No,” you whispered, shaking your head. “No, just a little ink.”

Kakashi stood, striding toward the other side of the room. He washed his hands under the sink before returning a moment later, damp rag in hand. This time, he sat on the edge of your bed, hand enveloping your own.

With slow, delicate movements, he swirled the rag across your skin, stealing the ink from your skin almost as effortlessly as he’d stolen your heart. If only you knew how easily you’d done the same.

“I was so scared you’d hate me when you found out,” you whispered. His hand tensed under your own, but he didn’t stop his ministrations. You continued, “Since I kept talking to you, both as your soulmate and myself, I was so worried you would feel betrayed.”

“I did,” he murmured quietly. “At first.” He flipped your hand, wiping away the stray trails of ink that had escaped from your palm. “When I got the message, I couldn’t believe that you’d… after all this time, it was you. And when we found you almost dead, I thought the world was punishing me again, just like everyone else…” Looking away, he began wiping the remaining ink spots off his hand, leaving your fingers to fiddle with the fabric on his knee. “But on the way back, all I could think about was the things I’d said to you. How could you trust me after I so blatantly pushed you away? How could you look me in the eye and put your faith in me when I hurt you so deeply? The fact that you’d tried to stay by my side after everything, the fact that you put your faith in me to keep you safe, after all the things I’d said to you… you never betrayed me. You’ve been by my side all this time, and I want to be by yours. Completely.”

You squeezed his knee, searching his face for any sign of illusion. “Is this real?” you whispered. “I want this to be real.”

Kakashi smiled, eyes crinkling as he took your hand. You looked dazed and happy as you stared at him; he’d never encountered anyone else so stunning.

Before he could stop himself, he leaned forward, brushing a masked kiss over your forehead, then your eyebrow, and finally your cheek. The pressure sent sparks across your skin, and you squeezed his hand a little bit tighter.

He hovered over your lips, breath ghosting across your skin through the durable material of his mask. You leaned forward, nudging his nose with your own. It was a silent message that you wanted his affection as much as he craved yours.

His breath puffed against your lips once again, and his voice, barely audible, filled the minuscule space between you. “Would you mind closing your eyes?”

Instantly, you complied, proving to him yet again how lucky he was to have met you. You put your faith in him time and time again, and he promised himself in that moment under the moonlight that he would do everything he could to be as compassionate a partner as you had been for him.

One of Kakashi’s hands released from yours, and you faintly heard the brush of fabric against skin. Your stomach fluttered as you felt his breath on your face again, warmer and closer than before.

And then his lips caught against yours, a gentle press against your tingling skin. His hand cupped your cheek, and you melted against him. The scratchy blankets and the faint hoot of owls faded into the background. Everything seemed to disappear except for you and Kakashi and the oh so delicate kiss between you. From the brush of his lips, so soft and tentative against your own, you sighed, leaning into him even more than before.

He groaned when the two of you pulled away. “I can’t believe I waited so long for that. Make Out Paradise really doesn’t do it justice.”

Make Out Paradise also hadn’t prepared him for the way his heart would race at the sound of your laughter.

“Are you sure?” you asked, reaching toward your bedside table. “Surely there’s a good passage in here somewhere.”

If it meant more time by your side, Kakashi was willing to spend an eternity searching the pages with you, stealing kisses for every paragraph you skimmed through.

~

In the morning, the nurses were alarmed and horrified to find Kakashi Hatake laying in your bed, one arm wrapped gently around your side, masked nose nuzzled into your neck. On the other side of you, his fingers brushed the cover of a well-worn Make Out Violence novel.

It was indecent, a break of protocol, and, most of all, a shameful mockery of their hospital security. But when you woke to find Kakashi’s nose tucking a little closer into your neck, a mumbled “good morning” slipping into your skin, neither of you could think of a more fitting way to wake up. For the two of you—soulmates, real soulmates—the scenario was somehow perfect.

He wasn’t one to care about looking indecent. You could certainly get behind that.

You welcomed sappy, romantic gestures. Kakashi was willing to privately oblige.

Yeah, you both thought, the soulmate thing could definitely work out.

Masterlist

A/N: Don't mind me casually fandom hopping again. This fic has taken ages to finish, but I'm so excited with the result! I have several more Kakashi fics currently underway, so I hope to get a few of them finished sometime soon! Have a nice day! :)

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