#i need the bootleg like now

[notinmyvocab]

From Pia's Instagram

#the prom #pia douwes #dee dee allen #i need the bootleg like now

[dandyseedlings]

my friend said to me as i was drawing this that, quote, "it looks like they took his brain out, pickled it, and put it back in."

#lackadaisy #lackadaisy cats #lackadaisy fanart #rocky lackadaisy #rocky rickaby #dandydoodles #on a related note: when describing casts of characters to my friends on vc #generally i like talking about couples together #but when it comes to lackadaisy i like to position my descriptions of rocky between freckle and ivy #i go through my description of rocky like normal. #he's the 'leader' of the young adult trio. he plays violin. he compulsively rhymes #he needs to be so good at bootlegging right now or else he'll throw up right now he swears to god. #and my friends are charmed but not shocked with these descriptions #and then i get to end the description with 'also he's homeless and got his head split open'. #then i move on to the next character description while they're begging for more context #context that i refuse to give them

[felizusnavidad]

What musicals (current or past) would you like to see? And cast albums that are on your list to listen to?

ANON, I LOVE THIS QUESTION SO MUCH! THANK YOU!

so, the ones i really want to see at the moment (i'm not sure if you mean live or just bootlegs, but let's say both) &/or listen to (this is gonna be super chaotic i apologize in advance):

hadestown with jordan & lola, please... i love hadestown, i love eva & reeve but JORDAN & LOLA! 😭 they are something else, ok?

i am literally dying to see waitress live & i know it's possible in poland, so maybe this year?

hamilton, but for that i have to visit my sister in the uk

tick tick boom, because i only saw the movie, i wanna see the play as well

new york, new york because i was obsessively listening to the cast album last year so it's time to finally watch it

preludes, but i don't think this will ever happen, there are literally no recordings of that one & i am obsessed with the album... (let me just say dave malloy is criminally underrated)

anastasia is actually first on my list cause i haven't seen/listened to it yet

you guys are gonna hate me for this, but i haven't seen/listened to wicked yet... i always thought that maybe it's not exactly my thing but i also feel like i need to give it a try, cause it's a classic that everybody loves

i wanna see the great comet live please that would cure my broken soul (or just give me the bootleg with phillipa soo lol i don't think it exists)

i also need to listen to the rest of dave malloy's musicals, cause i only listened to those you can find on spotify (so ghost quartet, the great comet, preludes & octet - would love to see all of them live, especially ghost quartet, that would be an experience) - clown bible is first on my list

once - i've never seen the movie or the play but i absolutely love the song falling slowly from it so i guess i would love the musical as well

camelot with phillipa soo, because she's my wife & i would die for her

but also into the woods with phillipa soo because i couldn't find it anywhere & i don't even know if it was ever recorded

from the new ones i'd really love to see the notebook cause i've heard a lot of good things about it & i also love the movie so i bet the musical must be really good

also, the great gatsby with eva noblezada... my second wife. i really, really need to see this one

...those are just off the top of my head, but i am always open for suggestions, if you think i should watch/listen to something cause i may like it, just let me know!

#in fact i wanted to write a post the other day like #just recommend me a musical #drop the title in my inbox & force me to watch it #there are a lot of musicals i haven't seen yet & like i said i am always open for suggestions #also sorry for being super chaotic lol #but it's usually just like that for me: i watch a bootleg then i come back to the cast album a few days/weeks later & i become obsessed #waitress is a great example tbh #i watched the proshot & absolutely fell in love with it #but i am streaming the album just now because i needed time #& i finally became fully obsessed #i'm weird i know #anyway #recommend me a musical if you want #anon #i saved every letter you wrote me*

[lesbiangiratina]

I found them in my bedside table My angel

#i just wanted to clean my room but my mom felt bad about not doing anything so she made it a whole Cleaning Thing #soooo now i feel like garbage and im grumpy because my plans got thrown off. but whatever. #i shouldnt have thrown out this testament i couldve taped it up next to the other one. oh well #i have other testaments i want to print out. i have cards to bootleg. #idk if ill have the energy i need to clean up all the stuff on my bed :’) cuz i didnt get to finish what i was doing :’) okaaaaay #the kat goes meow

[goldiipond]

so desktop tumblr decided a small unintrusive messaging window that matched the colors of whatever blog you were talking to was too fun and replaced it with a colorless box that takes up a third of the space on my dash and is, in fact, so large that the notifs/settings/asks/whatever bar covers both the url of the person (who cannot be identified through unique blog colors anymore) and the x i need to click to close the window. yes this is surely a good and needed change and our most pressing area of concern among this site’s many issues. to close the window you need to either load a different page or open someones blog on your dash to remove the top bar and click the x. weee need your money to continue bringing you the changes that really matter like this one. try our new game where you give us real-life money for our crab pngs and see how many you can summon to make the remaining 2/3rds of your window completely unrecognizable you piece of shit

#skye's ramblings #WJAT IS THE OINT OF THIS!!! WHO BENEFITS. KILLS YOU #i dont even regularly get messages from anyone besides ash but like. why did the feel the need to change this #this plus their interest in phasing out custom blog themes really just feels like that one 'no fun allowed' image. tbh #icould see how the smaller window couldve been an accessabilty issue MAYBE. but saying tumblr typically cares abt accessibility is. funny #at least size it correctly so ican get it off my screen when im done. i hate you #yknow tumblrs recent changes are really reminding me of when i tried to use twt to interact w my pm/tok friends there #and lasted like. a few days? before abandoning it bc everything abt the way that site operates is insufferable to me #look me in my eyes. i am talking directly into your ear now. if you turn tumblr into a bootleg twitter i will do something unforgivable

[maladaptivedaydreamsx]

OM! Nightbringer spoilers below ⚠️

#karasu also mentioned smth about 'making the demons obey you' and then immediately went 'oops wrong game!' disjjdf 4th wall break 😂 #feels like you def need to have at least basic knowledge of the og before playing this one; def recommend it #ended up getting a ton of the affection bonuses (w no guide) funny enough #a lot of it atp is just references anyway hahahha #like freezing goldie and solomon's ass cooking (and lil bby henry) aaaaaaa so qt #obey me nightbringer spoilers #nightbringer spoilers #obey me nightbringer #my post 📫 #aerin.jpg #l'hôtel.obeyme #l'hôtel.nightbringer #obey me spoilers #(?) #all of the new features are hilarious #devilsitting babycam???? bootleg tktk???? lmfaaooo #never even had actual tktk now i have the demon bootleg im pmsl #tho honestly seeing them be treated like shit for being former angels.. kinda hurt yikes #but also weird to see given how they're the fuckin lords and all now oof

[bagofpikachus]

there’s 150 i’m born to see paint, to be a pokemon master is my destinyyyyy

or in other words here’s the kanto section of my paintdex (ft some alolan forms, dupes i made out of boredom, and my cat’s fuzzy pillow in the background)

#bootlegs #except now they're just art i guess #i legit love doing this so much that i keep buying these #it requires a lot of patience and i needed to really hone my skills but like #i like how most of these turned out #paintdex

[piplupod]

it is weird to come back after so long away, idk what everyone has been up to or whats been going on for everybody dhfjdkl part of me wants to ask like hey how are y'all doing, whats been happening in your lives, but i do not think that is a normal thing to ask on here nor do i think it'd help me feel caught up on everyone's stuff

however i do feel a little curious like... how's everything going for everyone? anyone do anything interesting lately? this is such a strange question to pose to a bunch of strangers but i just like hearing abt other ppls things esp after being so disconnected from everything for a while dhjddkl

maybe weird to ask 1k+ ppl though but i DO genuinely enjoy hearing abt other ppls lives and their things they've been up to dhfjdl i like knowing other ppl exist and are experiencing things

#i am also holding myself back by the scruff of the neck from rbing a shit ton of Cats content fjdkdl #i am on the hunt for a bootleg w this cast bc i want to see it again bc my memory is so bad and I've forgotten lots of it already #i only saw it like... three nights ago? two? idk rhfkdl #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #i am so tired dhfjld praying i sleep well in my own bed tonight thank goodness #very glad to be back in the house but also i desperately wish i was somewhere actually safe fjfkdl #but !! i am going to try to get back into my routine ! just trying to figure out how to do that bc i feel so discombobulated now

[snobgoblin]

okay so just so we're on the same page, these are all the plates I'm spinning rn (aus/projects I'm participating in)

PPNK! Gangreen Gang

Arturoverse

Next Gen Gorillaz

RRB Collab with azar-rosethornn

And of course, the Chemical X comic

#i #might need to prioritize things eventually #but for right now it isnt terribly stressful actually #there are a lot more #like the bootleg boys au and its-all-connected #but those are like #secondary projects

[inga-don-studio]

Oh, so we’re at that mid-tier stage of the sleep deprivation loopiness, eh? The ‘Do All the Things’ stage because I think I suddenly feel great, when All the Things involve using power tools my drunk-tired butt shouldn’t even look at right now.

#I was too nervous about today’s apartment inspection to sleep last night #Not that I had anything to worry about since I take good care of the apartment #It was more because I know how shaken I get when strangers compromise my little personal space- and my anxiety was having a field day #Jokes on my anxiety though- #both the maintenance guy & the apartment manager spent more time geeking out over my weird shit than inspecting #It was actually really sweet though?! The manager started going on about how much she loves the Haunted Mansion too & the maintenance guy- #-wanted to know what all my bootlegs were? And then the manager said she didn’t want to leave? Like bro? 🥹 #So this was the first time I haven’t felt violated or gone into flight mode despite having unfamiliar people in my space? #Probably won’t happen again but it was genuinely nice #But uh now that that’s over and the lack of sleep is catching up my brain’s starting to play it’s little tricks #Worse than the mild hallucinations is the impulse to do All The Things to stay awake when I know All The Things involve tools I shouldn’t- #-use when this tired #But I want to get working on the Moon mask & try out the idea I have for making his face spin #And I’m starting to feel the pressure of having the headcrab mask done in time for Midsummer Scream in a month #Too many stabby burny potentially toxic things that my drunk-tired butt can’t be trusted with rn #I’ve never handled a total lack of sleep well so I just need to choose something simple & safe & go to bed early #And maybe order some Pandas because I can tell my energy crash is going to be a doozy & fixing dinner won’t be in the cards #Oh gawd this is long sorry #🎃 cryptid sighting

[bisexualclarkkent]

I’m once again crying at a smutty self published gay romance novel

#I’ve been reading a lot of romance this year because I want to feel something but I always end up crying lol #it’s funny because nobody loves me but that’s fine because I’m funny and interesting #and I don’t need romantic love because I have my cats and like two friends and I’m on medication now so I’m going to be fine #I think no more romance after this lol #not for a while #bre’s bootleg bookblr

[coridallasmultipass]

Measured, motherfucker.

Lmao it's been years since I ordered the Bro body pillow case, and was severely disappointed in how he's not normal dakimakura sized, and then executive dysfunction happened, and I just never got around to measuring and hunting down a pillow insert WITH THESE COMPLETELY ARBITRARY AND NONSTANDARD DIMENSIONS. (14.5"x44.5" or 37x112cm... normal dakimakura are supposed to be 50x150...) Genji for scale, lol, bc Bro is TINY.

But I just read a fucking fic that utilized this pillow as part of its plot, and I said, fuck it, I may be sick and going through medication withdrawals right now, but I am goddamn measuring and ordering a pillow. I have a mighty need to be cozied up between these two sick ninja dudes.

Well, guess what. 37x112 is a totally weird fucking shape and I'm probably gonna end up doing some sewing if Bro turns out to not be a size queen.

#man im shaking im so tired #ive spent all of 2024 sick and now withdrawals are still kicking my ass #me #just wanted to #vent #bc got damn would it have killed their budget to make bro 50x150 #seriously how much did i even fucking pay to get him like ider lol #wish id gotten the bootleg one i saw before the official bc at least that wouldve probably been standard size #the genji is a bootleg obviously #where is terry kiser i need his monstrosifier or whatever the fuck for bro #Cori.exe #Image.exe #ShitPost.exe #seriously im sick dont look at me jus wnted to make a funny by wearing my shitty broken shades

[darklordofthesimp]

Delirium (Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader)

Summary: Being partnered with Ghost was never easy. However, when you find him bleeding out on the kitchen floor and delirious from blood loss, you make a discovery. The L.T loves to talk.

Requested by Anon: #57 You're shaking.

A/N: Some Sunshine to feed you while I work on Anything III.

Category: Mutual Pining

Warnings: Description of injury || Graphic language

You weren't a medic by any means. 

There was the combat first aid course that you were all forced to do during basic training, but that had been a century ago. You'd handled your own injuries when an enemy sniper would get a lucky shot. Again, there's not much to do there other than put some pressure on it.

Otherwise, you were fairly inexperienced when it came to handling injured team members. There were shortfalls to being a sniper, hand-to-hand combat wasn't as relevant and having to provide first aid was rare. 

You call them shortfalls because now, in a situation where those skills are required, you're fucking struggling. 

You'd opened the door to the safe house with a sigh, frowning when you couldn't see Ghost through the windows. You'd assumed he'd be waiting for you to arrive from your nest but clearly, he didn't give enough of a fuck to wait around. 

You could have died en route and he'd be sleeping. 

For some reason, the thought hurt. 

You could think of a million things that he probably thought more important than you; staring at a wall being high on the list. What you hadn’t expected, was to find him collapsed on the kitchen floor.

“Ghost,” you rasped, choking on his name. His eyes flickered open at the sound of your voice, the relief palpable in his gaze. He groaned and let his head fall back against the wall with a strangled noise. You were frozen. You’d never seen him injured and honestly, you thought that you never would. 

You’d even told Soap that Ghost was probably just a bootleg Robo-Cop beneath the mask.  

But, the blood soaking through his uniform said otherwise. 

“You gonna give me hand or not?” His voice was low and rough. It had no edge, though. There was no bite behind his words like there usually was and it scared you. The man hated your guts and if he was too injured to convey that then he was definitely dying. 

“Oh God,” you breathed, leaning your rifle against the wall slowly. Your eyes never left his crumpled form and his eyes never left your face. “Oh God.” 

You slid to your knees, rushing to his side with frantic curses. You couldn’t see the extent of the wound from beneath his armour and he clearly didn’t have enough strength to take it off himself. 

“Stab wound,” Ghost offered the cause of injury through gritted teeth. “Got me good.” 

“This shit needs to come off,” you tugged at his armour, reaching for the quick-release cord. The man groaned but he didn’t object. One hard tug of the plastic ligature had the vest falling apart at every seam, the line now loose in your hand. 

“Fuck,” the man gave a startled chuckle, taking a large breath with his chest free from pressure. “Feel better already.” 

You didn’t reply, eyes narrowed on the wound beneath his ribs. You pulled up his shirt, tucking it beneath his arms as you scanned over the injury. It was clean cut, a clear entry wound that was steadily leaking a shit tonne of blood. 

No sounds of air sucking in through the jagged flesh and you thanked whoever was listening that it wasn’t a punctured lung. You didn’t have any seals on you and you didn’t want to slap him with some duct tape instead. He’d never let you live that down.

“How’s it lookin’, Sunshine?” Ghost asked, breathing heavily.

“Unfortunately,” you began, pressing the cotton padding from your kit against the wound, “if you apply pressure, you’ll live.” 

“Unfortunately?” He coughed,  the sound strained and you could tell he immediately regretted the movement. 

“Very fucking unfortunate,” you confirmed with faux seriousness. 

You stuck a gauze pad to the wound once you had finished packing it, reaching into your med pouch for a bandage. You’d wrap it around his midriff to keep pressure on the wound, you decided. 

“A ray of Sunshine you are, as per fuckin’ usual.” 

You clenched your jaw, reminding yourself that he was injured and that you couldn’t stick a finger knuckle-deep in his wound as retaliation. At the very least, he was back to hating you. Meant he wasn’t dying any time soon. 

You frowned at the bandage in your hands, desperately trying to remove the plastic wrapping. You couldn’t think straight and your body felt jittery as the adrenline began to settle. You couldn’t believe how vulnerable he was, unable to gather the strength to take off his own body armour. 

You hated it. 

Why the fuck couldn’t you open this wrapping? 

You pulled harder on the plastic, trying to bring your heart rate down. Why were you breathing so hard? 

A gloved hand fell over your own. 

Your frantic tugging came to an immediate halt and your eyes snapped up to meet his, startled. Ghost's gaze was half lidded but just as intense as always, grazing over your features. Heat flushed through your body at his drunken stare. You knew it was from the blood loss, you knew he could barely see straight, but that kind of look was reserved for someone he was sharing a bed with and you couldn't function at the sight of it. 

For a moment he said nothing, blinking slowly- too slowly- as he took in a breath. 

"Relax, kid," he murmured eventually. "I'm okay."

You swallowed hard. 

His fingers were soft over your own, too weak to apply pressure but curled over your hand just the same. 

"I am relaxed." You bit back at him, returning your gaze to the stupid fucking bandage beneath both of your hands. You didn't want him to see how much this affected you, you didn't want him to think you were a cowardly mess. 

There was a soft huff as he patted your hand lightly. "You're shaking, Sunshine."

You sucked in a breath.

Your eyes flickered back to meet his, lips trembling at your exposure. He knew. The gentleness in his gaze was otherworldly, so foreign you wondered if it was even Simon Riley beneath the mask. Blood loss was clearly doing a number on him and he was doing a number on you. 

“I’m a sniper, Sir.” You coughed, trying to tear yourself from the sudden intimacy of the situation. “I don’t shake.”

Ghost tutted from beneath his mask. 

“Haven’t been with the right bloke, then.” 

Your jaw dropped. 

Ghost blinked at you as though he couldn’t believe what had come out of his mouth, either. Jesus fucking Christ. You suddenly realised why Soap had made fun of Ghost for never drinking when you’d all be at the pub. You remembered asking the Sarge why the masked enigma would always bail after an hour or two and his response was simple. 

“The L.T can’t hold his tongue when he’s on the piss.” 

You thought that implied aggression. 

Clearly not.

“There is no right bloke,” you rasped, slowly pulling the bandage from beneath his hand. The loss of contact left you feeling empty but suddenly you could breathe a little easier. 

Your fingers shook violently as you tried for the plastic wrapper again and your gaze flickered to Ghost’s face, praying he hadn’t noticed. You should have known better. 

His eyes were on your trembling digits, a soft exhale making it’s way to your ears. 

“Looks like I’ve proved you wrong, Sunshine.” 

The words were low but there was no heat behind them. It didn’t feel lustful, they were murmured like an afterthought, his mind elsewhere. You wondered where Simon Riley disappeared to in his head when he looked at you. 

“You crack a lot of jokes for someone who’s a literal shish kebab,” you snapped, tearing at the plastic wrapping with your teeth. Finally, the bandage came loose.

“And you talk a lot of shit for someone who cares more than they let on.” The words were fired back, demanding your attention. 

You stared at him for a long moment, resisting the urge to squirm beneath his dark gaze. You’d never seen that expression on him before, as though he were daring you to disagree. As if he were waiting for you to say something. 

“Can’t care too much in this business, Sir.” You choked on the words, unravelling the bandage.

“I believed that once,” he tilted his head. 

“And now?” You prodded, leaning over him to wrap the bandage around his midriff. You tried to ignore how close your face was to his, how your fingers trailed against the skin of his stomach. The Lieutenant shivered beneath your touch and you kept your gaze downcast. 

Fingers gripped your chin softly and you gasped as he tilted your face upward. 

You were half on top of him, nose to nose and his stuttered exhale brushed against your lips. Simon’s eyes were half lidded and this close you could see the blue of his eyes, a stormy ocean that swallowed you whole. You were caught in it’s rip tide, drowning in the reverence of his stare. 

“Now,” he murmured, lazily examining our features. His eyes lingered on your parted lips, his thumb slowly swiping your bottom lip. “Could say I’ve had a change of heart.” 

#simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #ghost x reader #cod mw2 #call of duty #ghost #ghost call of duty #ghost cod #call of duty x reader #call of duty mw2 #cod x reader #cod mw2 ghost #cod mw2 x reader

[adhdvane]

idk if this counts as a costume ~happy halloween~

#sammy be quiet #sammy no #my dumb face #look i had zero energy this month bc i didn't have my meds ( i have them now ) #i feel bad bc i feel like halloween keeps happening when im not ready rip #the bootleg pikachu hat i got from my secret santa last year at work finally being worn again #im glad to wear card again i haven't put the sleeve on in a while #i usually have a yugioh card in it #though i did one time put a CAH card in it #i need to remember to wear it again more #happy halloween #pokemon

[unpretty]

hey. Please link the pillow? 😢

i am going to use an amazon affiliate link but if you would rather look it up elsewhere, i support you. if you can find it cheaper literally anywhere, get that one. if you can find a bootleg please tell me because i looked for months before giving in and buying this fucking pillow. if you think you can get away with making your own out of foam, go for it. if your work gives you an HSA/FSA you can buy it with that, but you cannot get health insurance to reimburse you for it (i checked). i had to buy this fucking pillow with a goddamn payment plan. a pillow payment plan. nothing will make you question your life choices like needing a payment plan for a fucking pillow.

anyway it's called the medcline.

i have horrible acid reflux but ended up basically never using my bed wedge when i finally got one because trying to side sleep on a cheapo wedge is a nightmare. on multiple occasions i have slept so wrong i couldn't turn my neck for days. one time i fucked up my shoulder so bad i couldn't sleep on that side for a week. i have no idea how i pulled that off but clearly i have invented some advanced sleep failure techniques. as near as i can tell my sleeping body defaults to the family guy death pose, which is not ergonomic. so i bought the goddamn armhole pillow and figured if it didn't work i'd return it.

my side of the bed is a fortress now. when i pull the duvet up it looks like ferris bueller is trying to convince someone he's sick. the big curling body pillow looks like i killed clippy to sleep inside his corpse. when i am getting ready for bed it looks like i'm plugging myself into some kind of pod. it's so fucking dumb. i am sleeping great and no longer falling asleep to the taste of bile and waking up with a fucked up neck. my hips don't hurt. i can't return it. i can't go back to the before times. i'm so mad about it.

#original #affiliate links jsyk #greatest hits

[katakaluptastrophy]

You know when you're at a dinner party with God and things start to get...weird...? It's Maundy Thursday, and it's time for more Bible study for fans of weird queer necromancers!

It's currently Holy Week, the week where liturgical Christians reenact the events of Jesus' death and resurrection in real time. And today, it's Maundy Thursday, which commemorates the Last Supper, where Jesus ate with his friends before he was crucified.

Before we get to the Locked Tomb, what's so special about the Last Supper?

There are actually a few significant things that happen during the Last Supper, but this is where Jesus introduces the concept of communion:

Now as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and after blessing it broke it and gave it to the disciples, and said, “Take, eat; this is my body.” And he took a cup, and when he had given thanks he gave it to them, saying, “Drink of it, all of you, for this is my blood. - Matthew 26:26-28

This isn't actually the first time Jesus has told his followers they will need to literally eat him:

So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood abides in me, and I in him. - John 6:53-56

If you're thinking that sounds a bit intense, you're not alone - the Bible says that "many" of his disciples left after being told that they were apparently going to have to eat Jesus to be saved and resurrected.

While many Protestant denominations take this symbolically, Catholicism teaches transubstantiation: that when the priest prays over the bread and wine at mass, they really do become Jesus' body and blood.

With this in mind, let's circle back to necromancers:

"Overseas to Corpus. (She likes the word corpus; it sounds nice and fat.)"

This is probably Corpus Christi College, Oxford (named after the Solemnity of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Christ, where the church celebrates the real presence of Jesus in the eucharist). The symbol of the college is a pelican - there's even a fabulously gilded pelican atop the sundial in their main quad.

What do pelicans have to do with the eucharist? Quite a lot, actually... The pelican is a really old symbol for Jesus, because it was believed to feed its young on its own flesh and blood in times of famine. The pelican on the Corpus Christi sundial is pecking at its own chest.

The pelican, like Jesus, was believed to give its own body to save those it loved.

Okay, so we've talked about Jesus, and weird cannibal birds, but why is this relevant to necromancers?

Specifically, the necromancer, the Necrolord Prime. John Gaius styles himself as "the god who became man", echoing Jesus as "the word became flesh". His entire pastiche of divinity is a sort of bootleg Catholicism. But while Catholicism posits Jesus' offering of his own body as foundational to the salvation and resurrection of humanity to eternal life, John's godhood relies the exploitation of other's bodies as the foundation of an empire of eternal death.

I've mentioned before in discussing Lyctorhood, how vampires have been understood to represent a sort of inversion of the eucharist because instead of consuming Christ's blood to receive eternal life in heaven, they consume other people's blood for an cursed eternal life on earth. John, and the Lyctors who followed him, gained power and eternal life from the consumption, body and soul, of another person.

In Catholic theology, Jesus offered his own body to degradation and death for the eternal salvation of humankind, but John forcibly consumes someone else's in service of his own apotheosis and immortality, dooming humanity in the process. He wants to be a Catholic flavoured god, but without the suffering that entails. But he's perfectly willing to outsource that suffering to others.

There's something just achingly awful about Alecto liking the feel of the word "corpus" - "body" - when she so hates the body that John constructed for her. John describing Alecto as "in a very real way" the mother of humanity and the mother pelican on the Corpus sundial rending her own flesh for her children. John forcing the earth into a personification of femininity and playing Jesus on another's sacrifice. His daughter, unwillingly trapped in her own corpse walking around with the wounds of her significant self-sacrifice like the resurrected Christ but yet again another body exploited by John in support of his performance of godhood. It brings to mind a very different fantastical engagement with Catholicism, where in the Lord of the Rings Tolkien - riffing on St Augustine - suggested that evil cannot create, it can only mock and corrupt. The ethics of The Locked Tomb may be messier than that, but there's something indicative in how John shies away from his creative powers - his abilities to grow plants, and manipulate earth and water - in favour of his dominion over death.

The metaphysical world of The Locked Tomb is clearly not intended to be the same as that of Catholicism. But with hindsight, perhaps John was onto something when he was surprised that he didn't "get the Antichrist bit" from the nun too.

John isn't the Antichrist. But he is, thematically, anti-Christ.

If we're talking about John and Jesus, there's also, of course, the question of Resurrection. But we've got to go through Hell and back before we get there on Sunday...

#the locked tomb #tlt meta #john gaius #alecto the first