#i haven't had one in years <3

[wednesdday]

                how    all    occasions    do    inform    𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭    me    ,    and    spur    my    dull    𝚁𝙴𝚅𝙴𝙽𝙶𝙴    !    oh    ,    from    this    time    forth    ---    if    i    must    strιkᥱ    you    𝖉𝖊𝖆𝖉    ,    i    will    !        (    𝗂𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗉𝖾𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗇𝗍    &        𝗵𝗶𝗴𝗵𝗹𝘆    𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲     study    on       ＷＥＤＮＥＳＤＡＹ    ＡＤＤＡＭＳ        :    as    conglomerated    from      𝕞𝕚𝕩𝕖𝕕    𝕞𝕖𝕕𝕚𝕒      over    the    decades    .    )

#* . SELF PROMO #indie horror rp #indie stranger things rp #indie dead by daylight rp #indie supernatural rp #idek how to tag self promos anymore #i haven't had one in years <3

[season1mac]

season1mac makes season 1 mac gifsets 1/8

s1ep1: the gang gets racist

#iasipedit #iasip #it's always sunny in philadelphia #mac mcdonald #my gifs #season1mac makes season 1 mac gifsets #his arms and his hair in the first one go crazy #sorry all the gifs look like they have different psds on them #they don't <3 #i haven't made gifs in probably 5ish years but i think they turned out pretty good #he is biting his lip and STARING at dennis in the last one #i screen recorded this on mute so i can't remember what they were talking abt but i can't imagine he had any reason for all that #mac

[writeouswriter]

The curse has lifted (finally wrote more than like 10 words on something)

#writing #writeblr #writer things #it's not my original fiction but i finished 1 chapter of a fanfic at 1041 words and like it's been so long #i've had lots of started projects and opening paragraphs for original stuff and junk #with like random scenes in half stages of completion over the last year #but this is a solid 1000 words for one thing in order and not like with blanks or nowhere to go #i haven't really written that much chronologically for one thing in a while #i think it'll be a 2 or 3 chapter fic hopefully i can keep this going #i have a complete chapter it's short but i'm happy it's something #i have half a chapter of another fic too and it's getting there #maybe i can write after all #just... maybe #now to bring this over to one of the projects i actually have been wanting to work on come on brain yip yip #thing is the fanfic i do is already like jumping into the middle and it's not the same for og work #where i have to establish things prior to the jumping in to the angst and all but hey #we'll figure it out #the curse may still come back but for now... you know

[becca-e-barnes]

BECCA THESE SUBBY DBF!BUCKY THOTS ARE KILLING ME IN THE BEST WAY I LOVE IT SO MUCH😩😵‍💫🤤

Coming back to this because my weakness is submissive older men 🤤

Just the thought of clamping your hands around his neck while you're on top and watching him lose it makes me dizzy.

I absolutely love the thought of fucking yourself on him, grinding your hips back and forth with his length inside you while he whimpers and moans beneath you.

He's surrendered all the control he's ever had. You both know that it'd take very little effort if he decided he wanted to change the dynamic but he has no interest in doing that.

He wants you on top of him, using him for your own pleasure rather than his. He wants you to leave scratches down his chest where your nails have sunk into his skin. He wants flushed, stinging cheeks, reminding him of each little slap you've given him when his eyes flutter shut and he stops looking at you for even a few seconds.

But then one of your hands cups his neck and that feels like an entirely different kind of submission. It's not a painful sensation that he expects when he imagines being submissive in bed; it's dizzying. The light pressure on his neck is delightful but more than anything, it feels like you're fully in control. He's vulnerable like this and he loves it.

"Both hands. Please." He's never sounded so needy and any hesitation you might have felt a few seconds ago melts away. Your other hand joins the first, wrapped around his neck, your fingers squeezing slightly and he looks entirely blissed out underneath you.

"Oh fuck." He groans, thrusting his hips up towards you in a desperate attempt to make sure he's buried as deep inside you as he can manage.

"You're fucking pathetic like this." You tease, adjusting your grip on his neck to remind him exactly where your hands are. You feel his pulse under your fingers and you feel your body flutter at the realisation. "You're losing yourself in me, aren't you?"

His eyes close for a few seconds while he tries to focus on the sensation, rather than the sight of you but that won't do. You take one hand from his neck, slapping his face gently and the rush he feels from the release of pressure is euphoric.

"Did I say you could look away?" You tease, putting your hand back on his throat, keeping your grip tight while he shakes his head.

His hands land on your hips, helping you grind back and forth on him, rubbing his length right where you need it. He probably won't get off like this but you absolutely could.

"I want to feel you cum. I need you to squeeze my neck and my cock at the same time." He's fantasised about this and it shows.

"Make me." You were half joking but he starts working your hips faster, setting the pace he knows you like until he stops suddenly, holding your hips still.

"God, I can't cum yet. I don't want this to end." You forgive him this time for closing his eyes, giving him a moment to collect himself before he's back to fucking you on him, begging you to squeeze his neck harder.

#asks answered <3 #becca writes spice #anon #sub!bucky #dbf!bucky #subby!bucky #this is absolutely going to be tmi but I refuse to shut up about it #because #for the first time in my life #I actually had an o that another person was fully responsible for #no toys #I didn't have to do a single thing #that's never happened before #it's taken 7 years #7. years. #so you'll understand why I'm so giddy about this 🙈 #anyway 🙃 #one of my faves at work got engaged a couple of weeks ago #and I haven't seen her since then #so I'm going in early tomorrow to put up a tonne of decorations for a lil engagement party #her desk is going to be a sparkly disaster #and she's going to HATE it #I can't wait

[intervalart]

good morning

#live a live #the sundown kid #live a live mad dog #mad dog live a live #sundown live a live #live a live sundown #sketchbook #traditional art #i'm sorry i haven't been posting much #all i've been drawing is self indulgent au garbage that i don't wanna share here lmao #i've got other stuff in the works i promise #it's just been an Entire Fuckin Month #i'm taking care of my senior parents (one of which will need surgery soon) and i had to quit my job of 3 years #so uh. still recovering form that haha #anyways i gotta get my ass ready for hourly comics day bye

[goldpilot22]

haunting ground should have had an ending where they were t4t for each other

#haunting ground #fiona belli #daniella haunting ground #hewie #hewie haunting ground #daniella doesn't have a last name does she #haunting ground fanart #psii.txt #my art #the once a year non original character art #I haven't actually played haunting ground but I know about it #if fiona can befriend debilitas she should get to befriend daniella also #and its homophobic that she can't /j #also when I first saw gameplay vids I thought fiona had short hair so that's how I draw them #are there even any fans of this game on this site #the games like 20 years old by now #surely there's someone else who saw daniella and went 'evil woman <3' and got sad there wasn't an ending where she becomes ur friend #these are low effort doodles because no one else has drawn this and I had to put my vision out there asap

[thedreadvampy]

The thing is I am definitely not happy or chill in the Immediate Sense lately but I am, big picture, so fucking happy with the person I am.

It's like. My brain was made by and for consistent trauma and since that trauma stopped about 5-7 years ago, it is incredible what the amount of resilience and cleverness and flexibility and thoughtfulness I developed to survive can do when it's not being all spent on surviving. like I had a hundred ton weight on me so I had to get REALLY STRONG to stay in the same place and not get 100% crushed, and when that weight came off I found I can use the strength it used to take to stand up and I can leap tall buildings in a single bound.

I was talking to my mum the other day and she said, "you've got the 'fuck it' energy at 30 that most women don't find until their fifties at least" and I'm like yeah man. Imagine how unstoppable I'll be in 20 years.

#red said #i don't know that i can express this clearly but it's the most encouraging thing in my life #my mum's always been proud of me but just lately she seems to actually really admire me #like she's genuinely impressed. she thinks I've surpassed her. i don't necessarily agree but it's a really nice quiet joy. #anyway like this sounds super up myself and it kind of is. #but also it's part of realising just how heavy the weight I've been carrying around with me for 25 years was #like not to be ridiculous but i have realised again this week. that it isn't that everyone's been raped that much and doesn't talk about it #i just have been raped an Unusually Consistent Amount. i have spoken to a lot of people who have had much more horrifying things happen. #I'm not sure I've talked to more than a couple of people who've had a similar level of total consistency of abuse from all angles #and the one is not heavier or harder to bear that the other. but. i think i spent most of my life listening to people's awful experiences #and going ok well nothing i went through looked that bad so it's microtrauma #obviously microtraumas build up but still. #then the older i get and the more i have these conversations the more I notice that stuff which to me is a microtrauma #is a lot of people's defining trauma. and they're reacting appropriately which means i am SO SEVERELY UNDERREACTING #told my friend the other day about a time someone who i still like and respect was having sex with me when i paralocated my hip #and then just kept getting really annoyed with me for not being ready to have sex again while i was literally crying with pain #until i caved and just tried to find the last painful position #and my friend was like pal what the fuck that's horrific #and i was like i mean no that's normal I've had sex with like maybe 3 or 4 people in my life who i haven't had similar stuff with #like i am genuinely thrown when i am allowed to say no to sex and have it be the end of the conversation. and not end up having sex #out of guilt or out of physical coercion or through physical rape. and i have had sex with probably like 40 people at this stage? #and I'm not sure it's as many as 4 i haven't had that experience with tbh #so like. I'm slowly coming to terms with the idea #that i may have actually been doing a hell of a lot of heavy lifting. #like i developed a sense of self that can survive being constantly crushed and at this stage is fucking diamond.

[keeps-ache]

there are a couple changes i would make to the keyboard if i could:

wiggly exclamation mark

bleeding heart emoji

varying snake emojis (more poses would be fun)

question mark with a little heart for the dot bc, well,

more explosions

and that is all thank you

#just me hi #i need these a lot #wiggly bc it makes a lot of sense #i am saying something but with a sort of ~~~~~~ to it!! #/bleeding heart because the other night (it musta been about 3 a.m.) i was looking for an emoji to really get my point across and i sadly #realized that i had imagined the existence of it. the disappointment was immense <//3 hfhs #/SNAKES. need i say more? :> #do i know a lot about them? not yet. am i scared of them? yes. but i love them a lot thanky #/i am asking a question but it's with love #<3 #/explosion emoji my beloved #we NEED to diversify hfhsvb #a mushroom cloud would be cool :3 or one that clearly has shrapnel in it #or one with a little heart that's like the exploding head emoji. because it's like that #i'm mentioning hearts a lot bc the heart is willing but the brain is. trying #//anyway in the other newsings i'm remaking those pi.e refs again lmao 👍 #ik they're only so many months old but man i changed some of the designs a bit during those months hfhs #funny how i made refs because i thought 'oh i haven't changed their designs in forever - it's not like it'll happen anytime soon yea?' #and then.......... #oath's design has changed the most minimally during these - how many ? two‚ three-ish years - so i thought Ahh nothin'll happen #but Then-- #aura has morphed So many times - she was at least 3 different people before i actually Got her so hfvhs <3 #kinda knew that would happen. but she's actually changed the least so Lollll #hid's usual look has not changed at All - only his actual form‚ which i tweak every second day or something #and i've neglected kira so badly fvfsh - so now i've added and removed and swapped things for her in worldrecord time ! i think i've got he #in a way i like though so :D #but bc of all these changes now i gotta make new refs bc they are Inaccurate #not a big deal. but oh it IS #wonder how long it'll take me this time lol :) only one way to know ehegh #//anywho ciao ! i've got the things and stuffs to be doing.. ooo toodles :33

[ta-bajna-cerna-okybaca]

Now that I finally got to play TWST diasomnia chapter 1 myself, I'm gonna need everyone who said Malleus was a baby throwing a tantrum for no reason to pay me 2000 dollars each

#twst #twisted wonderland #yes it did take me until the second to last day of the new chapter event to finish book 6 what of it #in my defense i had no good leona&jamil cards for chapters 66 and 67‚ i'm glad i managed to do it at all. robe malleus carried the team <3 #anyways! i haven't seen this take in a while but i remember it popping up a lot earlier this year when we got diasomnia on the jp server #as a member of the malleus defense squad i can't bear all this slander and now i have proof it's baseless #his overblot is one of the most justified ones??? what do you mean no reason #He's already established to be constantly left out and lonely because of it #And now he gets hit with the triple whammy of 1) realizing his fellow students' mortality after book 6 #2) learning that his father figure is dying and in one week fucking off to fantasy china to live out his retirement without him #3) his best friend the MC telling him they found a way to un-isekai themself #Maybe he could have weathered one of those‚ but all three at the same time? #Poor guy stood no chance‚ those are hits straight into the trauma #Of course he's gonna have a breakdown! It's not his fault breakdowns in twisted wonderland come with a side of destructive berserking #And to be fair from what i've heard in spoilers all he did was put the whole school to sleep he didn't even destroy all that much #like yes putting everyone to sleep so they can live forever and never leave him is not a healthy reaction #but this is Unhealthy Reactions The School it's not like he's such an outlier in that #leave my boy alone 😭 #excuse my ranting i'm just insane about twisted wonderland and malleus specifically

[roxyandelsewhere]

Angels’ trueforms in their most memorableimagined moments [22/?] - Cas and Dean having sex for the first time

inprnt | society6 | redbubble | ko-fi

#MY LONGEST YEAH BOI EVER!! yall knew i'd make this one eventually. i simply had to #spn #spnart #spn art #trueforms #mine.caro #this one has a whole backstory bc listen. i started this one A YEAR AGO #tl;dr i was making it in the living room when my grandma had an accident. went to the hospital. and then moved in with us #and after that the art supplies for collages just sorta stayed in the living room and i hadn't touched them since until like 2 weeks ago #when i decided Okay. it's been A YEAR. that's enough. i need to finish this #the original plan was gonna be a 3 parter with a whole story of HOW they got to that point and everything #but it's been a year. i figured i'd finish this. post it. and maybe someday do that 3 parter bc it's a whole other thing #that was gonna involve a nephil and everything but i haven't figured out how to draw those. i will when i draw jack :) #anyways this one has weirdly less to explain bc the dean part isn't me doing human souls yet. this is about cas above all #so it's more like. dean as he is physically/metaphysically/wtv in relation to cas and all his dimensions #so i went with a collage to do that relation. angel trueform vs a smattering of earthly human things #a mess of body parts above all but not only that. i was gonna include more Violence Imagery but i didn't have a lot of cutouts for that #the trueform itself doesn't have much that's unique. i basically got the leviathans-bloody valentine trueforms and melded them #bc the original idea was gonna be set around s6 and it includes a lot of the same overall vibes and feelings of those moments #and i pictured that fusion with that big central. yes. eyemouthvagina:tm: opening up. the physical effect of that in the patterns #the black hole/eye in the middle same logic. the usual yonic touch bc it's me and who's gonna stop me i guess #and the collage choices speak for themselves i think? or at least i can't phrase them better than what's already there #so now here it FINALLY is and i'm gonna put it up on the stores. hope yall like this one #oh and. the hand cutouts in cas are dean grabbing him and the drawn hands in dean are cas grabbing him #hope that was clear without the explanation tho sdkjfg

[carcarrot]

scrolling back through my liveblogging of the day of the nyc concert because of recent notifications and its such a fun mixed bag of emotions to relive it all again

#helloooooo pineapple in my notes i do not mind the likes and reblogs <3 #but it was such a crazy day that day of the show. so much happened #i also didn't remember that the day before the concert is when my bus got messed up and was taking me back to ny #and i had to get a car service home and everything #and then there was the concert the next day! #and what i had done was worked monday. took all of tuesday off for the concert. got like maybe 4 hour of sleep if that #and then went back to work wednesday. stupid #it worked out fine lol but i dont think id do it that way again idk #other remembrances of the day: #my biggest regret is getting all worked up abt my stupid letter that never got to them anyway like jeez. obviously i still enjoyed the show #but still. OH and i missed out on getting the latte pinback buttons #not the biggest deal but i did want those. i was just awkwardly standing around before the nyc show #and the merch line was always super long anyway #what else. oh i wish i could have met those of you that were there. but next time! im cooler now so next time. #the show itself was crazyyyy. again so fun and surreal #one of the tags on my original review was something along the lines of me having not been this excited since i was a kid #and it was really like that. like it really was that absolute pure overjoyed excitement that i haven't felt for a long time #i felt the same at the hollywood bowl. just having so much fun (missing it now lol 🥲) #cant remember if i mentioned this before but when i was standing outside the stage door i saw both spike lee and adam driver leave backstage #adam driver is Tall. i didnt even recognize him at first fdhgkgkg #anyway. some thoughts almost a year later wow!

[heartshattering]

5 AM

Just me and my overactive mind facing the nighttime again 🙃

#hopefully the meds work but while waiting for them to kick in I get so damn nervous #and sometimes I do get nights where even on my full dose my anxiety is too overpowering and I just. Do Not Sleep #I mean I do eventually but not without spiraling first :') #way before I was prescribed sleep meds my longest was 3 nights without sleep while on a VERY stressful trip #I felt like I was gonna die and I did not sleep until I got off the plane and was back at home #(this was like 15 years ago already but it still haunts me fhfgsgdh) #my best friend and I were having a conversation today #and she was like 'not sleeping can make you hallucinate right?' #and I was like :') I get the hallucinations in other scenarios too #BUT I also get what she meant #not sleeping is really bad for me mentally which is why I can't do 'sleep restriction therapy' #and fun fact #a lot of my OCD obsessions revolve around sleep!!! #which is 'awesome' because laying in bed with insomnia makes my OCD flare up so like #the two get to feed off each other and make my life a living hell!!! #and don't even get me started on my sleep paralysis episodes #(which I like to think of as just my brain misfiring but that my aunt tells me is saints or demons trying to talk to me) #'cause she hallucinates too but hers are like 'spiritual' or whatever #same with my mom's hallucinations as well #and to add fuel to the dumpster fire of my mind and body is the fact I've been overcaffeinating again #which I've known not to do ever since I was in middle school and saw the pediatric cardiologist who specifically said 'hey don't do that' #fast-forward to adulthood and I still haven't learned how to handle anything #like. I have heart meds and sleep meds and migraine meds and IBS meds #and yes meds are good but like. I know you need to incorporate lifestyle changes as well #which I do for like 2 weeks until the next time I fuck up #I've been so irresponsible lately but like. ESPECIALLY today #didn't eat #took some meds on an empty stomach and forgot to take my other ones at all #had too much caffeine #stressed out over some stupid situations thanks to overthinking

[mid-nightowl]

<3 5 facts for a celebrity au? (pairing of ur choice!)

hi tauria!!!! thank you for ask :) <3 <3 <3

this is a good one, but it was a challenge. now bear with me, we're gonna do a dickjaytim celebrity au 👀

Jason’s the celebrity (but like minorly?). He's a theater actor and is well-known in theater circles etc., but most people off the street wouldn’t recognize him. He’s a fan favorite on twitter/social media though, for being a scathing but good critic for new books and books-turned-movies. 

>>Tim’s the CEO of Drake Industries and a rival to Wayne Industries in Gotham (but like he doesn’t take it as seriously as he should to the despair of his board). His parents died when he was a teenager and after graduating high school early, just took on the company and does whatever he wants. 

>>Dick is an orphan and the ward-adoptee of Bruce Wayne. Same backstory as canon, circus kid adopted by rich Gothaminite. Bruce and him act more like older brother-younger brothers and act like Alfred is their father/grandfather figure. Bruce is CEO and offered Dick a position at the company but Dick would rather not. Unclear on what job Dick does in this but he’s not a cop (blegh).  

>>Tim and Dick are local celebrities, well-known and often chased by paparazzi, but Jason’s the real focus for this AU.

So, Tim’s a CEO and has to attend galas and rich people events, socialize and get people invested in his company (as well as prove himself a capable CEO despite being so young). He typically hates these events, dreads going, comes up with any excuse he can, but does attend some. He attends a theater play, expecting not to have to talk or socialize too much because it’s a play, and falls head over heels for the main actor, Jason. 

>>Tim sort of falls into being a stalker-y, secret admirer of Jason but Jason’s pretty smitten with all the nice, thoughtful notes and gifts he’s getting (especially compared to some gross ones he gets from Roman Sionis and other old rich dudes hoping to buy his favor). EXCEPT, Timmy’s not the only one in the running for Jason’s hand. 

>>Enter Dick Grayson. Dick was often third-wheel to galas and other events with Bruce and Selina, often exasperated and bored. But, so so similar to Tim, attends an event expecting to be bored out of his mind and is instead captivated by this stunning actor aka Jason. Cue the courting and gifts. 

And expectedly, Tim and Dick both start to realize there’s someone else trying to steal Jason and they figure out who. And this starts an epic rivalry over Jason’s heart. It starts with trying to out-gift the other, both buying Jason elaborate but meaningful gifts (rare books he likes, regular books, flowers and jewelry, donations to his favorite charities, etc). And it escalates rather quickly. I imagine Dick can be downright mean in this and Tim is just as biting, both unashamed in their rivalry and obsession with Jason. Anyways, there’s a lot of fun and hilarious stuff you could do with Dick and Tim fighting without physically fighting. (I’m giggling over them sniping at each other over twitter and Gothamnities just being ???? until Jason [Gotham’s adored theater nerd] chimes in and fans start having a lightbulb moment) 

Eventually, Tim and Dick’s rivalry hits a high point and the two tumble into bed together. And then they both decide they can just share Jason. Jason, of course, is oblivious to all of this. He likes Dick and Tim a lot, like a little too much, but won’t make the first move because he is a shy baby and then starts to think they’re only doing it as like a weird rich kid rivalry ritual and don’t actually care about him or his feelings. 

After Jason’s (inaccurate) revelation, he starts to pull away from Dick and Tim (especially when paparazzi and social media pick up on the fact that Dick and Tim seem to be “dating”). Dick and Tim take this as a challenge, and Jason (and his coworkers/friends) thought it was bad when those two hated each other, but Tim and Dick working together??? It is…terrifying? Impressive? Terrifyingly impressive? Jason’s already head over heels, but now he’s obsessed even more (but also overwhelmed and a bit light-headed at all the swooning he's doing, it’s a bit too much at times). I’m running out of steam here, but eventually Dick and Tim do manage to convince Jason that yes, they do adore him, and no, this is not a weird rich-kid rival thing. And Gotham breathes a sigh of relief when Jason gets caught leaving Dick-Tim's penthouse covered in hickies and wearing their clothes :))

#ask game #ladytauria #thanks again for the ask!!!! <3<3<3 #i def headcanon in this jay is kind of physically tiny but his acting make him feel larger than he actually is #but he still has some self-esteem issues from when he was a kid esp off-stage when he's not in a persona/mask #tim fell in love with jason's care/passion and his brain/tongue #(not to mention tim and photography esp capturing jason in the throes of his acting the imagery aesthetic and all that jazz) #i think jason tests and sharpens tim; reminds him that he loved learning; loved knowledge and information #tim and jason teach and learn from each other but in a playful way? maybe jason kind of reminds tim of living life outside of work #dick fell in love with jay's performance like dick looks at jason and it reminds him of his own performances at Haly's #and jason's heart&passion was so similar to dick's own #and dick hasn't felt that in years (not since his parents fell; not since he stopped flying) #and dick wants to chase that feeling; wants to hold and cherish it and jason brings that out of Dick so badly he needs it all the time #and then tim and dick fall for each other for their unwavering loyalty determination and drive maybe even matching stubbornness #like it is very much is a rival-to-lovers subplot #they end up really respecting one another and realizing they haven't had this much fun with another person since jason #and i also think there's a built trust in the fact that both of them know they'll fight and work to understand one another #okay this is a lot of tag rambles i will stop now lolol

[straightuppotato-art]

OC-tober Day 3: Old OC

One of my oldest ocs and a lowkey persona, Miss Cat!!! Yeah, she was a cat girl named Katrina <3 Little Potato was very creative, I promise!

#WAH i haven't drawn her in years 😭 #I do think about her all the time though <3 #this is a mini redesign too but she hasn't had cat ears in a long time </3 #art that i do #cat girl #oc: cat #oc-tober #bweirdoctober #Big lights will inspire you let’s hear it for Queue York Queue York Queue York #had to queue this one because I May Have forgotten to do it yesterday 👍

[grinchwrapsupreme]

the show casually ignoring the inherent tragedy of the Red Dwarf crew reading letters that were sent to them 3 million years ago from people and companies that are long gone

#the fact that they were travelling so fast for so long that those letter are only now reaching them #they were a dead ship being chased by sentiments from people who didn't know they were dead #i do wonder sometimes when rimmer's dad died #like was it before rimmer died? after? before or after the people of Io knew the ship was missing? #did she write the letter and send it not knowing if it would ever reach him? #did she care? #red dwarf #THERE'S A QUESTION #were there news reports about the ship going missing? #did they lose contact right when everyone died? #or did they not notice until the end of those 6 months when it didn't come into port #did they hold funerals? memorials? was there a big deal made about the Tragic Loss? #did holly bother to send a report on what had happened before he diverted the ship #so many things we'll never know because they'll never get back home #unless it's in one of the books and I just haven't read it #anyways i'm literally at work right now #but also its really funny that rimmer got a 3 million year old parking ticket

[antisocialxconstruct]

.

#actually. damn. that's really just kinda hitting me now #technically we Broke UpTM right at the start of 2022 but we lived together for another year because of. reasons 🙄 #march 2023 I moved out and was officially independent for the first time in my life so in about a month that'll be one whole year #I've been feeling really cruddy this week in particular about feeling like I haven't really Healed and Grown '''enough''' #whatever I think that even means lmao #but this is kinda putting into perspective... I've basically had people isolating me and preventing me from forming outside connections #for almost two decades. 2/3 of my life :| the fact that I've held it together at ALL for a whole year on my own has to count for something. #anyway WOW nobody asked lmao #like I said I'm really normal about music it's NOT weird that a random album has me reflecting on 20 years of past trauma