#i had to fucking cut this down because

[r0b0t1me]

was reminiscing on past interests and threw this together. look at my funny little guys

#not art #these range from 'if you talk about them to me ill explode' #in the top tier #to 'i really like them :)' in the 2nd #then the bottom two are a free for all #i generally just like their designs and vibe #or like they dont have a deep/rich lore but i still enjoy them #i had to fucking cut this down because #my memory is so bad #and i only have strong strong feelings about such a select amount of characters

[inkskinned]

the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.

capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.

now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.

and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.

and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.

and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".

it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"

#this was much longer i had to cut it down for legibility #but i do want to say i am aware this post doesnt touch on human rights violations as a result of fast fashion #that is because it deserves its own post with a completely different tone #i am an environmental educator #so that's what i know the most about. it wouldn't be appropriate of me to mention off-hand the real and legitimate suffering #that people are going through #without doing my research and providing real ways to help #this is a vent post about a thing i'm watching happen; not a call to action. it would be INCREDIBLY demeaning #to all those affected by the fast fashion industry to pretend that a post like this could speak to their suffering #unfortunately one of the horrible things about latestage capitalism as an activist is that SO many things are linked to this #and i WANT to talk about all of them but it would be a book in its own right. in fact there ARE books about each level of this #and i encourage you to seek them out and read them!!! i am not an expert on that i am just a person on tumblr doing my favorite activity #(complaining) #and it's like - this is the individual versus the industry problem again right because im blaming myself #for being an expert on environmental disaster (which is fucking important) but not knowing EVERYTHING about fast fashion #i'm blaming myself for not covering the many layers of this incredibly complicated problem im pointing out #rather than being like. yeah so actually the fault here lies with the billion dollar industries actually. #my failure to be able to condense an incredibly immense problem that is BOOK-LENGTH into a single text post that i post for free #is not in ANY fucking way the same amount of harm as. you know. the ACTUAL COMPANIES doing this ACTUAL THING for ACTUAL MONEY. #anyway im gonna go donate money while i'm thinking about it. maybe you can too. we can both just agree - well i fuckin tried didn't i #which is more than their CEOs can say

[front-facing-pokemon]

#something is very obviously different about these two compared to my normal images on this blog. i acknowledge this #also the sv model is Really good. and since they always stare straight at the camera anyway… and no one pays attention to the background… #and the only high-quality phantump model i could find was so horribly shiny that its eyes were just white voids #in my defense‚ phantump always just stare straight at you in game #the lighting is different‚ yeah. that's probably the dead giveaway. beyond the background. but like. i'm the only being on the planet who #really likes phantump anyway. i feel like it's a generally forgettable pokémon to most folks #phantump #HELLO this one is a weird one. i have some explaining to do. so when i did this one i didn't know how to edit models really at all #and when i got the models for these‚ the xy models were super shiny. shiny to the point that it made their eyes fuckin invisible #and i decided that since you could barely tell it was phantump‚ i needed a different way to get these images #i remembered that in the SV dlc‚ every time you find a wild phantump‚ it just fucking. stares. at you. and i was like. aha #i kinda remembered because of the test stream that i did. tumblr user alligayytorr (am i getting the right amount of Ys) said #“haha i am getting a sneak peek” when i zoomed the camera in on a phantump. and i remembered that. and i was like. i can utilize this #and ended up using just an in-game screenshot of SV in replacement of the regular content. later on‚ after that #once we got into gen 7 and it became less and less reliable to find models‚ i had to learn how to edit them manually to remove the shine #i am a software dev. not a 3d modeler. this ended up coming down to editing the code of the models directly (which i ended up writing a #script to automate). now‚ today‚ january 22nd (the day of me writing these tags and updating this post)‚ i remembered this post was in the #queue and was not normal. so i went back‚ ran the script on the phantump and trevenant models‚ and unshinified them #then edited these two posts to be normal. i have left the original pictures i took under the cut for reference and as bonuses #because i really enjoy phantump. so that's why those images are there‚ and that's why these tags are here #just for posterity's sake‚ the folks who come here mostly for my commentary‚ i've left the ORIGINAL tags of the post when i initially #made it with the SV pictures up at the top (i wanted to rearrange them‚ but tumblr makes that Very difficult‚ so i left them as-is) #so if these tags are confusing to read i Apologize. but i hope now that you're at the bottom you understand what happened #i'm gonna go edit the trevenant post now

[cak31ssuperi04]

fun fact: Them

#willos nation I have an important announcement to make #eyagh *disintegrates into powder and scatters into the wind forever* #that's all thank you for coming to my ted talk. #barbie mariposa #barbie mariposa and her butterfly fairy friends #barbie mariposa and the fairy princess #Had to attach a link to the last image because tumblr fucked the quality so bad #barbie #barbie movies #On a different note. They go on chore runs together. In my mind #I should've drawn that but you're going to hear it from me here instead #She invites him out on a laundry run to cut down on the being bored out of her mind and notices he's actually enthusiastic about it #Because like. Having grown up mostly sheltered and relatively(self-imposed or otherwise) isolated he #hadn't really had the experience of just Hanging Out very much #like hell yeah an excuse to leave the palace without having to deal with socializing with strangers. too much. #because she can deal with that. And i mean. he likes hanging out with her. #So she just keeps inviting him over for other menial chores. He's actually kindof competent at it and she really doesnt mind the extra help #cakeart #Also. also. She does poses for him. to draw. paint. whatever #Not in a weird way. in a figure drawing way. understand my vision. look me in the eye. #Artist/muse scenario in general. consider. consider. i'm correct #This post has been in my drafts since november it's not going to show up in the tags if I keep talking

[zeb-z]

“Red team was so selfish looking past the cursed team like that” listen man they were thinking about it often, and had evidence they were cursed too. They were convinced they were cursed too. Bad (with Pierre’s help I’ll be honest) singlehandedly destroyed any sort of civil relations and good faith between the two teams and this shot Blue in the foot when they tried to make the case about them being cursed last minute, about trying to rig it in the cursed teams favor.

There was never a cursed team in the first place, it was all a tactic to build paranoia and that feeling of betrayal and to get them to tear eachother a part. And it worked super well! At the end, neither would listen to the other about their evidence, not with an honest open ear, not with the willingness to think the other team could be cursed. It’s not a case of ‘Red just refused to listen because they wanted to win more than they cared’ they thought they were cursed too - if they were selfish, then so were Blue in the same way.

Every time Red had tried to talk first early on, it was met with extreme violence - and with Bad consistently proving he’ll play dirty to win, they didn’t trust Blue enough to listen to them in the later game. Maybe they should have listened then. Maybe Blue have listened earlier. The game worked as intended to set them against eachother.

#link is to another post I made back when they were debating about the cursed teams in purgatory and why red couldn’t trust blue and blue #couldn’t believe red. they were both stuck #and bless Tubbo he tried. he did try. but he was just as convinced he was right as Phil at the end. it was about convincing one another #more than it was about coming together and piecing together the evidence. yknow what I mean? they all cared about it but because of tension #and they also could not trust blue. which sucks because that’s hardly Tubbo’s fault but yknow #I dunno. it’s not simple like that. it’s not a case of red blowing it off being selfish not caring. they also thought they were cursed #AGAIN I’ll say it again bad burning bridges fucked a lot of them over for when diplomacy had to win because there could not be benefit of #the doubt or good faith or any sort of trust #it’s not just cut and dry red wanted to win more or blue wanted to win more. it was complicated and had way more factors #red thought they were cursed too!! they had solid evidence for this too!! #and like. again it’s a case of both parties kinda suck purgatory sucked it was always going to be like that because the game worked as #intended #idk. blue should have listened to red early on. red should have listened to blue later on. they were never going to do that on either side #idk from Tina’s pov it’s understandable why she said what she said. but knowing the others pov and what actually went down that’s not what #happened at all yknow? #they’re all gonna be feeling the effects of ‘we killed and betrayed eachother for two weeks’ for a while to come #mcyt #qsmp #qsmp purgatory #z speaks

[mishapen-dear]

something about qbad mentioning how much horror he put red team thru every time purgatory gets brought up... something about how proud dapper was of him.

like this is just my late-night read but- it feels like guilt qbad is trying to twist into pride. he keeps needling away at it. “i killed them all, over and over and over again.” “they were hunted by a monster.”

it’s like- reassurance. like a nail he’s trying o beat into his head. he’s had SO much trouble with legitimately hurting his friends, despite making that vow all the way back when the eggs first went missing, despite all the tree talk and the promises to save the kids no matter what. He never faltered with elq, and that protected them. He keeps faltering now. Sometimes he doesnt remember the code, or cucurucho, or skeppy. But that doesnt matter, right? Because he’ll protect the eggs. He’ll be the monster. he is the monster. he can and he will protect them even as his seams start ripping and he keeps breaking further and further apart. even at his worst, he’ll do whatever he needs to protect the eggs.

he’ll be the monster. wont he?

#qsmp #he loves his friends and he wants to hurt them #he loves his friends and he doesnt want to hurt them #qsmp badboyhalo #ita like. He was torturing himself with the soul vultures because he kidnapped ron and threw down some scary magma mobs #and then forever changwd rhe whole fuckin narrative with that appreciation room and bad remembered the joy of community #and then cellbit. Where bad was like ‘i see him destroying himself to get the eggs back and i know where that road goes’ #’his loved ones dont want that to happen to him. i dont want that to happen to him’ #and then purgatory gave him the first actal legitimate lead for finding their kids and he just had to get worse #and so he fucking swandived into self destructive violence (and the cc was purposefully playing qbad more recklessly violent) #(bbgirl couldve been lured into a trap so so easily) #ive lost my point somewhere now im just rotating qbbh in my brain and all the parallels #ah yes. But now theyre out of purgatory. And he refuses to regret what he did because he *had* to do what he could to save dapper #and the other eggs #because he has a huge complex about being the ‘only one who can protect the eggs’ because of a thousand little cuts and his mental health #issues. Like he’s Wrong bur its such a fascinating little direction for his character. Yes king burn thyself on the pure of protection #and then burn in a nuclear blast too because your self sufficiency left you to care for your egg alone #you can take care of the eggs. you can hurt your friends. look at how much you hurt your friends #look st the monster you are . your teeth are sharp and your claws are large #never mind that time you sent tina into a panic attack because you tried to recreate safety #never mind that your friends and family are worried about you #you are falling apart. but so many monsters survive the killing blow

[bitchthefuck1]

People who hate Shiv or think she was wrong for what she did in the finale are so unserious to me. "How could she screw over Kendall and stop them from keeping the company???" oh you mean the guy who promised they'd run it together and then immediately double crossed her? And then spent the rest of the season trying to cut Roman out of the company too?? How could she betray that guy??? real mystery.

#like are y'all just pretending that didn't happen? he was literally trying to cut them out the SECOND he thought he had a shot at the top #spot. why should she stay loyal to the plan if he literally never has??? be serious now #and yes she stabbed him in the back too but he started it and honestly what did you expect from these people? they've spent their entire #lives being trained to drag each other down for the top spot. that's not changing because they got along for 3 months and their dad died #also like 'we could have had a happy ending if she hadn't done that!!1!' first of all them keeping the company would NOT have been a happy #ending at all. and second of all. i'm sorry. were you expecting a straightforward 'we win' ride off into the sunset??? #from the 'the poison drips through' family trauma show????? be so fucking forreal. them getting out is the happiest possible #ending this show could have that wouldn't immediately ring false and feel unsatisfying #and before anyone tries to start something i am not a kendall hater or a shiv stan i'm just being honest #succession #shiv roy #kendall roy #siobhan roy #succession finale #with open eyes #roman roy

[in-omni-scientia]

COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] — Hey. Pssst. VOLITION — ... COMPOSURE — ...You've been staring at the wall above your little desk completely motionless for what can't be more than about two minutes straight now. I think Authority is getting weirded out.

You turn your head to where Authority has, also, been standing and staring at you completely motionless for two minutes. He tilts his head back and to the side a small amount.

COMPOSURE — Almost... inquisitively, I think.

"Just gathering myself. I'm okay." Involuntarily, your body tacks on a (rather awkward) thumbs up. He huffs and turns away.

COMPOSURE — Give him five seconds maximum, and he'll turn back again. I don't think he wants to let you out of his sight right now.

Shifting your gaze back to the notepad in front of you, you run your eyes over the list of allocated duties once more.

ENCYCLOPEDIA (FACTS)

Claims to be: "what I should be"

Currently useless.

Allocated job: Prevent Authority from speaking.

Allocated job: Stay quiet.

THE OTHER ONE PERCEPTION

Claims to be: "joy"

Currently useless.

Allocated job: Perceiving.

VOL ME

Claims to be:

Be dumb and stupid forever, haha. With love, Authority.

?

Allocated job: Do what we are supposed to.

COMPOSURE

Claims to be: Social cues, knowing how to act, culprit of the Suggestion Anonymo

Allocated job: Making us *appear* normal to the others.

Allocated job: Just generally keeping our shit together?

AUTHORITY

Do *not* allow to speak under ANY circumstances.

Allocated job: Movement.

VOLITION — Good. A rather rough draft, though I'm sure we can continue to allocate roles as we find them necessary. ENCYCLOPEDIA — A rather poor effort for categorization by your standards. PERCEPTION — Come *on*, why do I have to be Perception just because I do the seeing? I'd be far better suited for Ele... VOLITION — You both have *new* jobs now, stay quiet unless you can contribute something of use.

Flipping your notepad to a new page, you start to write:

WHAT CAUSED THIS?

ENCYCLOPEDIA — A good place to start. Theoretically, all reactions are reversible... VOLITION — What can you recall about our affliction? Anything at all.

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Trivial: Success] — Obviously, this happened after the Whale communicated with us. We were experiencing its effects prior to that interaction, but to a minimal degree; the pain inflicted upon its response to us prior to this beginning is not negligible. Causation can be assumed here. COMPOSURE [Easy: Success] — I have to point out -- well, look at Authority.

You cast a side glance in his direction. Even with your blurry vision, you can see him pacing back and forth, occasionally throwing a glower your way.

COMPOSURE — He’s fine, even after communing with the Whale. A little bothered by all this, obviously, but that’s natural. VOLITION — Yes -- it’s unusual. Charmer is fine as well.

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Easy: Success] — There’s a logical explanation for it. We just have to find one.

[Encyclopedia - Challenging 12] Do we know why you could have been impacted so adversely compared to your colleagues? (WHITE CHECK)

HIGH - 72% +1: Know about the Whale. +1: Savoir Faire’s fragmentation. -1: No Logic subskill. +1: Authority is here.

Rolling...

⚂⚄

CHECK SUCCESS (Challenging: 12 vs. Your Total: 14)

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Challenging: Success] — If *they* have not been impacted by a pale anomaly to the same degree as you have, you can only assume it has to do something with mental fortitude, or something similar. VOLITION — …Are you saying the Psyche skills know Volta do Mar? ENCYCLOPEDIA — No. Well – you could always ask, but I don’t know if you would get a good response. What I’m saying is, it may have something to do with your level. VOLITION — Go on…

ENCYCLOPEDIA — Recall the average pulses per minute for each attribute as studied by the Turtle -- [110 for Intellect, 150 for Psyche, 70 for Physique, and 50 for Motorics]. This lines up fairly well with the base levels for them, 4-5-2-1 (though some individual skills *have* been levelled beyond this via Thoughts). ⠀⠀Remember, too, the Turtle’s studies into the neurons. They made sketches of them – but some neurons had a strange pale sheath on them that was slowing their communication. (The fact they selected a Motorics neuron for that diagram is significant, too, as it evokes Savoir Faire’s current state).

ENCYCLOPEDIA — We know that it is unnatural for neurons to have that sheath on them. What I am trying to say is, I believe that perhaps the Pale Whale has given us pale exposure, and the skill’s levels afford certain Skills protection from being affected by the pale exposure.

ENCYCLOPEDIA — The effects of pale exposure for us seem to follow a pattern: high-levelled Skills, such as Authority, Suggestion and Empathy, receive no visible afflictions. Medium-level Skills such as yourself, Drama, Composure, Rhetoric, Pain Threshold and Interfacing have their abilities to communicate affected, and low-level skills experience partial fragmentation. ⠀⠀I am unsure of *how* this fragmentation exactly occurs, considering our and Savoir Faire’s presentations are very different. Though I believe we have the resources to figure this out.

VOLITION — Hmmm… ⠀⠀This theory may have some flaws in it. I will begin with smaller flaws. First of all, cop radio was affected with a similar presentation to Skills from medium levels. How do you explain this? ENCYCLOPEDIA [Easy: Success] — Esprit De Corps was the first to contact the Whale, of course; perhaps their initial contact overcame the natural protection their level afforded them.

VOLITION — *How* were we affected by the pale? The closest origin point is in Martinaise, and we have not been there for some time. ENCYCLOPEDIA [Heroic: Failure] — Admittedly, I have no rebuttal for that. Perhaps the theory that Harry has one in his own head is correct. Perhaps the Whale has the power to reach beyond the bounds of where pale ordinarily can.

VOLITION — Savoir Faire’s affliction was caused *prior* to the Whale’s first contact. ENCYCLOPEDIA [Medium: Success] — Remember, the incident occurred after you had explained the Pale, when they claimed to ‘backflip into Rodionov’s trench’. While that is completely ludicrous to believe they could actually pull that off six thousand kilometres from the nearest point of even porch collapse, I do believe the Pale has something to do with their presentation. ⠀⠀Furthermore, the Whale claimed in its contact with you that ‘Mother Nature’ is disgusted by us, that ‘the verdict’ had already been made. Perhaps it has had its eye on us for some time now, and Savoir Faire’s affliction is another case of pale exposure, simply occurring before we were aware of the Whale’s presence. VOLITION — So it wasn’t me… PERCEPTION — It wasn’t you.

VOLITION — Okay. And finally… ⠀⠀We have six points. Not that far off from the Psyche skills. This fragmentation is *not* a low-level presentation, unlike what you said. PERCEPTION [Easy: Success] — Actually… I’m so sorry. VOLITION [Formidable: Failure] — ? PERCEPTION — You are at two points currently. VOLITION — What? Why?

ENCYCLOPEDIA — Minus-two from No Wedding Bells Chime in this Church Anymore. Minus-one from Brilliant Bibliolater’s Blues. Minus-one due to the lost morale. (Normally that last one wouldn’t be an issue, but I think the fact you’ve been proclaimed Volition is doing that…) ⠀⠀They’re distributed among us, but they add up to minus-four overall for Encyclopedia, the construct.

VOLITION — You’re kidding me. ⠀⠀*Thinking about the concept of marriage* caused this? Made me more prone to it? ⠀⠀And I’m even more prone now because Authority yelled at me?? PERCEPTION — I’m sorry. IN MEMORIAM — Until pale do our atoms part. VOLITION — We… we have to forget those thoughts *now*. Do we have the points? ENCYCLOPEDIA — No. VOLITION — *Shit*. We need to—to ask someone what to do. Who do we talk to about this? Can Volition do something?

PERCEPTION [Medium: Success] — Are you sure you want to do this?

VOLITION — Of course I am!! I’m going to be *completely torn apart* if this goes on! PERCEPTION — If you forget those thoughts, you will never be able to think about them again.

VOLITION — Yes, well… ⠀⠀… ⠀⠀Never? PERCEPTION — Never ever. VOLITION — Well, I can’t get married or have favourite facts if I’m dead. PERCEPTION — Don’t you want to take the chance? VOLITION — Empathy wouldn’t want me to. I’d leave them all alone.

IN MEMORIAM [Godly: Success] —

⠀⠀‘Tis better to have loved and lost Than to never have loved at all.

PERCEPTION — Yes, exactly -- it will hurt them far, far more knowing you saved yourself but doomed yourself to never wanting more, than to know you risked yourself to finally put a name to what you are. You *talked* about that.

VOLITION — …Uhm. ‘Exactly’ to what? PERCEPTION — Uh. I don’t remember…? ⠀⠀But seriously, please. Just take the chance. It’s irrational, it’s irresponsible, it’s impossible. ⠀⠀But… give it a try.

VOLITION — ...Sigh. ⠀⠀You… *people* are terrible. Fine, I’ll leave them for now. But the *moment* any funny business happens, we’re dragging Authority with us over to Volition’s zone and demanding they give us the points to get rid of them.

AUTHORITY [Challenging: Failure] — You want me to do something?!?! VOLITION — Not *you*. I don’t call you Authority by choice, it’s simply because it is convenient at the moment. AUTHORITY [Legendary: Failure]— (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

VOLITION — So… what do we do now? ENCYCLOPEDIA — Actually, can I try to figure out what exactly is causing fragmentation to occur? It’s a rather big step up from language difficulties. This could be important to figure out. COMPOSURE — You should tell Authority what you have worked out. Just to let him know this hasn’t been a waste of time. PERCEPTION — If you want to regain a level, you need to heal that morale you lost; I would recommend finding Empathy. It’s been a little while since you last saw them. AUTHORITY — Definitely *do not* do that; not in your current state. They’re already far too stressed. ENCYCLOPEDIA — Finally, something reasonable from that one.

VOLITION — Hmmm…

[Encyclopedia - Legendary 14] Do we know how this fragmentation could be occurring? (WHITE CHECK)

About going to talk to Empathy…

“Authority, I think I’ve worked out what is happening with all of us.” (Finish thought.)

[Encyclopedia - Legendary 14] Do we know how this fragmentation could be occurring?

LOW - 28% +1: Know about the neurons. +1: Know about Savoir Faire. -1: Holes in your theory.

Rolling...

⚃⚄

CHECK SUCCESS (Legendary 14 vs. Your Total: 14)

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Legendary: Success] — It has to be the pale sheath that’s doing it. ⠀⠀The sheaths are slowing the action potential of the neurons they are attached to. Theoretically, if the neurons that make up *you* could not communicate fast enough to keep you together... VOLITION — …they’d start dissociating from one another. ENCYCLOPEDIA — Yes, like the turtle proposed. And each one may begin to function as separate entities. Perhaps it would get to the point where they disconnect entirely. VOLITION — Lord. Is-- is it reversible? ENCYCLOPEDIA — I don’t know.

You gaze down at your notepad unseeingly, half-filled with a near-unintelligible frantic scrawl that has barely kept up with the pace of your thoughts.

AUTHORITY — Unintelligible?! I’ve been doing my best! PERCEPTION — OG, we can find out. Heal that lost morale, get that one point back; see what it does for you. VOLITION — But… that’s not going to do anything. Losing it hasn’t actually done anything in regards to how this… condition is presenting itself. AUTHORITY — Wrong again, worm. Look up. COMPOSURE — I think you meant bookworm? AUTHORITY — Irrelevant. Look up.

You do – and gaze directly into a near-identical copy of your own face, with the notable exception of two pinprick lights flashing at you from the abyssal shadows.

AUTHORITY — Boo.

With a yelp, your stool clatters to the ground – but as soon as you’ve jumped up, it’s gone.

#contains: txt #author/s: me #skillsposting #long post #ooc: jesus fucking christ i had to cut out so much to get this down to 1k words. i wrote 3.3k while i was out bruh #there was a whooole part where they did all the allocating but I decided to cut that out so that this wasn't too long #because i didn't expect to actually pass the infodump 3 check... like look at that roll. sob #I think I still have it? idr whether I saved it or not. if I do then maybe I'll post it another time...

[oatbugs]

Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship

#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it #it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper #provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the #interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after #50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked #his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it #he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from #when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has #his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever #but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how #we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe #cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna #back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed #practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence #we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one #who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted #to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say #goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art. #you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea? #if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa #the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding #his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.

[brother-emperors]

I was looking at all the Pietro della Vigna conversation illustrations the other day and felt compelled to draw a whole bunch of lines because this canto has been rattling around in my head for 10 years now and oh man, Gustave Doré knows how to make an illustration that'll set my brain on fire

Dante's Divine Comedy (Inferno, Canto 13), trans. Robert M. Durling + the section notes for context

society6 | ko-fi | redbubble | twitter (pillowfort, mastodon) | deviantart

#OOF uploading this to tumblr really killed how it looks 😬 i did this at 3000px and cut it down to 1200 px for posting and #oughh that 500/540 for tumblr. hmm. #ah well! it is what it is. i dont draw with social media posting sizes in mind so i'll accept my fate #dante's divine comedy #divina commedia #drawing tag #suicide cw #if you ever want to know why i am the way i am a good part of it is that i took a class that covered the divine comedy in highschool #my teacher saw that i was really into it and gave me a copy of her teaching notes and also #recommended this edition because it had the italian with it #and then ANOTHER teacher saw i was reading it during study block and told me that i should listen #to an italian read along of it and that if i ever get the chance i should hear it performed IN italy #me 16/17: i think i can like this a normal amount #several adults in my life: fuck that you should literally fall in love with this stuff instead #and i took that to heart!

[beeduoo]

originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins

Lowkey i ate with rhis actually no i didn't i ate wirh rhat ENDER EYE Why is it so rendered Hello

IGNORW RHEIR UGLY UGLY DESIGNS This was before they switched to their iconic Skins past e didn't know......

#loosely based off of this old thing it's under the Cut #origins smp #beeduo #beeduo fanart #idk what other tags to put i cant put C because this isn't C this is O..... but like do people even check those tags idk #actually no im scared i heard theres been like three failed origins revivals i dont want to interfere with their character ecosystem i was #only there for the first one😅 #i rewatched some origins streams a little while ago oh my god theyre SO FUNNY #DUDE DOES ANUONE REMMEBER THAT ONE STREAM I COUDLNT FIND RHIS ONE STREAM #IR EAS LIKE THE ONE WHERE TUBBO WAS SINGING SUGAR BY MAROON FIVE thats all i remmeber ANF ALSO RNE can i call you senpaaiiii bit thay shit h #ad me CRYING in 2021 Please i swear this happened imnot crazy but also they might have been separate streams actuallu i dont rememebr its #been wayyyyyyy too long #BUT IT HAPPENED I PROMISE Sorry i've been gone for a while ive been very busy lots of Things going on went to Six flags then jad a surprise #bday party then i had to buy shoes for prom then Go to prom and also i do figure skating and am out like every day idknt have Time im sorry☹ #had a crepe yesterday it was sooooo goood im like learning to drive too that shit is boring as hell my dad kept gettign 😑 bc i couldn't stop #yawning DRIVING IS SO BORING its not my fault😭😭😭😭 #ok what else ohhhh. y god i locked in SO HARD for this physics essay u guys dont even knowim getting ONE HUNDRED on that trust i just really #wanted to share ok i love you bge #WAIT ACTUALLT SORRU IM LIKE REMMEBERJNG THE ORIGINS STREAMS K WAYCHED #RANBOO WAS SO FUCKING FUNNT IN THOSE STREAMS TOO LIKE I REMEMBER NIKI WANTED TO SEE THEIR BASE and tubbo was like ooh maybe we can put like #water down here for you niki we need a water system and ranwas like Do we though?I WAD WAYCHING THAT .LIKE DAMMMNNNNNN OM LIKE GIGGLING WRIT #ING THIS RIGHT NOW I CAN HEARTHE CLIP HE DID NOTTT WANT HER IJNTHEIR BASE😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #I NEED TO FIDN THAT STREAM WHERE IRS LIKE TOMMY AND JACK A D FHEHRE LOKE TALKING ABOUT DUOS AND THEN JACK SAYS THE MOST OUT OF POCKET SHIT I #VE EVER HEARD LKKE I LITERALLU HAD TK PAUSE. H PHONE AND BURST OUR LAUHJIMG MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOORRRRR DO U GUYS R EME ER WTF IM TLAKING AB #OUT IDK HOW TO FIND THESE STREAMS Oh my god u really Had to be there early 2021 that was liye the funniest era of mt life i wlild be #Tearing up from lauhjimg every day I MISS WAYCHING STREAMS LIVE CHAT WAS SO FUNNY I wishe it was archivedI WISH MORE STREAMERS KEPT CHAT ON #SCREEN i defiently understand why most didn't like Wyd when chats annouing ad hell but also Me 3 years later is interested in what the pub #lic had to say.... ok Now bye

[possamble]

woke up and got absolutely obliterated by a farcille fancomic on twitter how are you guys doing

#possramble #lsdfjvnsf it's by shindo9600 and you've probably already seen it if you're on twitter #i just. hooo boy i don't cry often #but that one was just like. every single had something that got to me and there were just like two pages in sequence that GUTTED me #i hate twitter's 4-image limit bc those two pages are split across two posts and like #i think it would have hit even harder if it was immediately in sequence instead of you having to click to another post #but jesus christ just. marcille holding falin and feeling the difference between little falin and the one in front of her #and then it cuts to two panels of her earliest memory of holding her father's hand and here last memory of it. #and then because it goes immediately to her hand on falin's face you don't get to see her expression until the next page #and it's just this held breath of grief and sadness until you see her smiling wryly and at least halfway reconciling with it #instead of flinching away from it #i had to put my coffee down and rub my eyes like wow. #i. god. what the fuck

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Asuka R Kreutz might be one of the greatest characters in fiction and if you play him in Strive I'm jealous of you - how do you do all that? My head hurts...

#sairambles #guilty gear #ggst #asuka r kreutz #fuck dude I had to cut off that ask pretty hard because I won't lie #we were entering the possibility of me sitting down and spending hours on research to cover the full scope of Asuka as a character #I hope whoever sent that ask is satisfied with my answer because it was #a lot #and a mess #I hope I got all the stuff right I was all over the place on the wiki double checking and shit #god the new wiki is so good #dude the timeline is AMAZING it's so helpful #I'm screaming I need to go to bed holy shit man I forgot to eat because I was busy get enraptured in Asuka lore #I am eating now #sorry thoughts spilling over now this is becoming messy #wow I'm really not normal #what is wrong with this guy (me)

[lesbiansanemi]

I am so fucking sick of living with my roommate and his fuck ass boyfriend. Also watching my roommate burn every single one of his (already rather minimal, I might add) bridges for this guy is also kind of painful but also his relationship with me is one of said bridges so I'm almost past the point of even feeling bad for him lmao

#i have had to piss for probably the better part of an hour now #because they decided to take a shower together and have been in there for well OVER an hour now #and this is a nightly occurence atp sometimes MULTIPLE times a day #we have one bathroom.... can yall not be considerate enough to not be in there for up to TWO HOURS AT A TIME??? #also it's such a waste of fucking water.... #idk we've hit a point where i literally hear the bf doing anything and i get pissed off #but also tell me why i'm sitting in my room (which shares a wall with the bathroom) and i can hear this man hacking and spitting shit up #and this is also something that happens multiple times a day #like.... dude.... why are you spitting up toothpaste so fucking loudly oh my fucking god #but yeah no i'm like my roommate's only friend atp and he's about to not have me lmao like we're about to reach #'i'm cutting you off when i move out' levels of me being pissed off with this whole situation type shit #and apparently the bf convinced him to come out to his family which his mom was chill which is good #his dad's side of the family though....? not great. and my roommate KNEW that would be the case cuz we'd talked about it before #also love that my roommate has constantly talked about moving out of the city we live in because he hates and also there's no good career #opportunities for him here (which is true) #and now. MAGICALLY. he's like 'idk i think it'd be best for me to stay here' #like oh my GOD???? are you hearing yourself???? are you fucking stupid???? you fucking hate it here??? #but sure throw your life away and ruin all your meaningful relationships for a guy you met six months ago jfc #and the thing is i *know* my roommate we've been close CLOSE friends for nearly a decade now #i know he is not like this.... like yeah he's being insane by allowing this but also i know these aren't the kinds of decisions he would ma #and also i know he wouldn't treat me like this all on his own #it's the deranged fucking control freak of a guy he decided to date and my roommate has too many of his own issues to put his foot down #about certain things and tell the guy no so he's just allowing him to completely take over his life #and fuck everything up until the bf is the only thing he has left once it's all said and done #and yeah. it's painful to watch. but also wtf am i supposed to do because obviously my opinion is not respected nor wanted regarding this #that has been made PAINFULLY clear #ugh this is so fucking horrendous #what is it with ppl who start to date someone and then go clinically fucking insane and destroy their lives all for this one person #who. realistically. they barely know in comparison to all the other ppl in their life #like explain it to me jfc

[distort-opia]

the fact that joker needs batman more than he needs joker is a very interesting factor of batjokes, makes me bitter as fuck (pardon my language), but still, a very interesting part of their relationship.

never have i thought that batman and joker's relationship would hit so close to home for me. in one of your posts ive seen someone mention that joker loves but hates batman for that exact reason and man. why did they make joker so damn relatable.

Yeah, it's definitely a conflict on Joker's part, which tends to get a bit overlooked in fandom. Joker is obsessed with, and in love, with Batman -- but he doesn't always like it. He's been trying to kill the guy and telling him he hates him, almost as frequently as he's told him he loves him. But yeah, both me and @lankylordoflevity have discussed this somewhere in my asks before.

But you know, while Joker does undoubtedly need Bruce more... his love for Bruce is a lifeline in many ways. His obsession with Batman gave him a purpose, kept him alive after he fell into the acid vat; his love is everything he has that matters, but it's so all-encompassing because he's got absolutely nothing else. Joker doesn't have a family, or any kind of moral rules, or anything that important to him. While Joker is conflicted about his dependence on Batman's existence, at the end of the day, to him... this love gives much more than it takes away.

But Bruce stands to lose so much. His inability to let Joker go has caused so much harm already. He's made some very questionable choices over time, among which him nearly killing Jason at the end of UtRH to save Joker's life is probably the biggest. His relationship with Jason suffered as a result; all of his relationships suffer from it, one way or another. After being shot in the spine, Barbara had to hear that Batman was seen laughing together with the man who shot her. Over the years, she had to watch Bruce go out of his way to save Joker's life, even when she asked him not to, even when it wouldn't have contradicted Bruce's rules to let Joker die. His relationship with Joker was a big obstacle even in his relationship with Selina; that's kind of the plot of Batman/Catwoman. And this is something Snyder saw too -- how difficult this pattern of Bruce's is to overlook, and how hard the Batfamily avoids addressing it. Death of the Family is literally about the impact of Bruce's selfish and reckless actions regarding Joker on the Family, and the understandable rift that follows when they can't help but realize Joker wasn't wrong. Because the reality is, Bruce has saved Joker's life so many times and in such ridiculous conditions at this point that it's baffling. And what Joker keeps doing after is more murder, more destruction, and worst of all: he keeps being a danger to all the people Bruce loves. Yet Bruce can't find it in him to genuinely let him die.

I guess, what I mean is, Bruce is the one to suffer the biggest consequences for his side of things. Hundreds of deaths, untold destruction, the eternal possibility of Joker crossing another line and killing more of his Family. Joker may need Batman more because he's got nothing else... but how many more excuses can Bruce come up with, to himself and to others, for the fact he keeps risking so much to keep Joker alive? In the end, what's crazier? Needing someone so badly that loving them is barely a choice, or choosing someone again and again no matter the costs while claiming you don't love them?

Don't know if that helps with the bitterness, Anon. Kind of ended up going off with my own thoughts about this. But for me a fascinating part of Batjokes is Bruce's own side of things, that often gets dismissed as him not reciprocating, or him being less invested. Joker is loud and vocal about his love, and it's easy to take him on his word; when actually, Joker would be the first to balk at the idea of a relationship that involved anything other than violence. Bruce is vocal about his hatred for Joker and his wish that Joker would die, but his actions contradict that time and time again; when he's the one to reach out and the one to keep Joker alive, even when Joker himself is trying his damndest to die. As the villain, if someone else murders him, or if Bruce snaps and kills him, Joker... wins. It's what he wants. But Bruce loses when he keeps Joker alive, and he'd lose himself if he finally murdered Joker.

One way or the other, Bruce always loses.

#asks #joker #batjokes #batjokes meta #my meta #Bruce can only 'win' by rehabilitating Joker. or not even #he can only win by HELPING Joker and in the process making him stop killing #and also it needs saying that. in many ways Bruce perpetually saving Joker IS a consequence of Joker's plot armor #and the fact DC needs to keep him alive so they can keep telling stories #but you know what. even then I feel like they could've cut down on the sheer amount of times Bruce had to save Joker #at the cost of others #I get that it's a compelling moral dilemma since we're talking about his nemesis and everything #but overusing it this way led to THIS. to decades of Bruce choosing to keep Joker alive #and Doylist perspective aside. from a purely Watsonian standpoint. how the hell can you explain it at this point #other than through an emotional attachment #it's such a cliche but I am hesitant about the word 'love' for it #both on Bruce's and Joker's side #because it's just so. fucking insane #what they have encompasses half the spectrum of human emotion. maybe more

[robertsbarbie]

wait i forgot to tell yall the absolute highlight of my day, and probably year, and probably existence because it was genuinely the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me

#i had to act like i was not crying in class because it shook me to my core #this one professor of mine great guy probably the only reason i have not given up on the graphic design program #starts class discussing our projects for the semester #and says both projects are brand new never done before #and one of them was a music project #where we get to choose the artist and create an entire spread of everything for them #lp/ digital campaign/ website/ spotify mockups the whole fucking nine yards #and this is a man WHO DID NOT KNOW WHAT MUSIC PACKAGING WAS OR ENTAILED UNTIL #I ONE DAY WENT ON A RANT ABOUT IT IN OUR FIRST CLASS TOGETHER #and who has asked me multiple times about it since and my amateur concert photos #and i’ve given him shit for cutting a different music project in the past #and this motherfucker looked at me (i’m losing my fucking mind at this point btw like full on #everyone in the class was looking at me after the announcement) #and this motherfucker looks at me ‘you got your music project buddy don’t let me down’ #and it just kinda struck me that this clown of a man A) listens to his students and proposes projects he thinks they’ll be passionate about #but B) that he listened to me and i’ve just i’ve never had that things like this are always dismissed #and this motherfucker listened and formulated a whole ass project to help me #like that’s so fucking insane to me #eris: text