#i got insecure 🤓

[bewby]

saw pics of chans nose hundreds dead thousands injured... I WANT TO KISS IT SO BADDD. SEXIEST NOSE IN KPOP AND I WANNA GIVE IT A LIL SMOOCH

omg havw you been stalking my blog cause i talked about chans nose soooooooo. many times as a big nose lover .... everytime i see it from the side i take one second to just appreciate THANK YOU MY CHAN FOR TURNING DOWN THE RHINOPLASTY OFFERS given from the company😽😽😽😽😽

that reminds me of how jisung got braces for his crooked front tooth and it makes me wanna die an angel lost its wings that day i always say this but he still has his fucked up bottom teeth so WE CHEER we party....

#ask #ihave a fucked up front tooth as well and people tell me whenever they see it they would kill me if i got it fixed but i want it fixed SO #bad because it makes me sooooo insecure. also only my closer friends have told me this i know the rest of the world thinks my tooth is uglay #🤓😁❤️ ANYWAYS

[annahxredaxted]

puhhhleasseeeeee David x Angel pregnancy headcannons 😫

NIYAHHHH HEYYY POOKIEE

of courseeee 🙇‍♀️

DAVID/ANGEL PREGNANCY HEADCANNONS

•afab reader— with gn pronouns

• pregnancy

david knew before they told him, he could smell it on them.

angel thought they were doing a good job hiding it before they told him.

after they did and noticed he was completely unfazed they were very concerned/confused

david was very excited but he was also nervous he’d be a bad dad.

very over-prepared, he started setting the nursery up maybe 3 weeks after they told him.

david will pass by things for babies in the store and discreetly put them in the cart, but when angel realizes he did they get all gushy and emotional.

very upset angel had so much morning sickness in the beginning, he would ache to see how much they were hurting.

HE WILL DELIVER TO EVERY SINGLE CRAVING!!

^ he does not care how stupid it may sound, if angel woke him up at 2am asking for beef fucking jerky you already know he’s up either in the kitchen or grabbing his car keys.

david rubs their belly all the time. sittings down? hand on the belly. in bed? belly rubs. in the car? belly.

david gets VERY upset if someone touches their belly/them at all if they don’t want to be touched.

^ will yell in the middle of a walmart/family gathering/in public etc,

foot massages, back massages, legs, back etc. if he can ease angels pain even a little bit he will not stop at mediocrity.

if angel is feeling insecure about their pregnancy body it actually makes david almost angry. not at them of course, but it’s the mentality of “your growing a kid, and you think i’m gonna be upset about a little more to love?”

david goes to every doctors, very attentive, asking a bunch of questions, writing things down, making sure angel does everything the doctor recommends.

^ he will and has cancelled meetings/ jobs to be at an appointment.

legitimately was panicking when their water broke, angel was just sitting there like: 🧍‍♂️.. while he was: 😱😧😦

he collected himself eventually to drive to the hospital

held their hand the whole time, he was a bit queasy by the end of it.

cried when baby shaw was born, held the baby close and did skin to skin almost immediately (like took his fucking shirt off)

he was scared to have sex for a while, he didn’t want to hurt angel, and they probably waited 4ish months, but even then he was extremely gentle.

in the beginning david refused to let angel get up when the baby cried

david cried when he had to go back to work for the first time since baby shaw.

spent the whole day after work with the baby(made dinner, did dishes etc with those things that wrap the baby to his chest)

•••

that’s all i got rn🤓🤓

#redacted asmr #redacted david #redacted angel #pregnancy #tw: afab reader #tw: pregnancy #gn pronouns #x gender neutral reader #afab reader #Preganant Reader #Pregnant headcannons

[unknownati]

iii. are you still watching?

a/n: EEEK ilygsm. im glad ppl liked the last post so much ^_^ <333 thank u!!!

u didnt hear this from me but i MAYYY be working on a lil something w ellie 😜😇🤫🤫

ngl? idk if i like this! i'm very 50/50 on it but ur the judge 🤷🏾‍♀️

warnings/tags: suggestive? like you're literally on the BRINK of fucking (so mdni!!) , still fluffy tho (you already know i can't live without it), "netflix n chill 🤓", cuddling, making out, not really tlou aligned more of a modern au, ending kinda sucks lol, guess what. NOT PROOFREAD 🔥🔥, once again not very long but still made with love 😁 🫶🏾

__________________________________________________

it took you an abby an hour to actually pick a show to watch. it always took you two forever, and the first 10 minutes of disagreement was usually on whether it should be a show or a movie. once you got past that, then it was which one to actually watch.

horror?..not really abby's thing.

sci-fi? not feeling that.

mystery? you didn't feel like thinking.

thriller? nothing good.

you eventually just settled on 'insecure' since you'd had your eye on it for a minute (and abby didn't feel like going back and forth with you anymore).

once you made it past the hour of picking something to watch, these were your favorite nights to have with abby. she'd come over, sometimes you'd order food, and you'd whip out your comfiest blankets to bundle up in. you had this specific blanket that abby loved to use, it was not too thin but not too thick, and it was adorned with these cute little cartoon dogs. she refused to let you use it even though it was yours.

you were fully invested in this show, but the same couldn't be said for abby. she kept glancing over towards you, staring for long enough that she didn't know what was going on.

you kept making small comments about the show just to receive late 'mhm's and 'ohhh's back. it wasn't until you took a peek at abby that you realized she wasn't even looking at the screen. "are you even watching it?"

she shrugged and nodded, almost defensive. "i am! you're just..." she exhaled, the faintest grin spreading across her face. "distracting."

you blink, raising a brow but matching her expression. "how am i distracting you? i'm not even doing anything, babe."

she nudges your leg with her knee. "you're just so pretty, i can't not look at you." you roll your eyes, focusing your attention back on the screen when the intensity starts picking back up. and abby let you watch. for a couple minutes, at least.

right when it was getting good, you felt a hand at your thigh. you glance over, she's darting between your face and your thigh; testing the waters. you don't say anything, still partially trying to see what's happening. her hand moves, up, up, right to the hem of your shirt. she pushes the fabric up, and that fully captures your attention.

"whatcha doin'?" you question, watching how she moves closer to you and looks at you with the prettiest, most love-struck eyes you've ever seen.

"nothing. just keep watching," abby reaches up and turns your head back towards the tv. you try your hardest to focus, but the feeling of her hands sliding up your shirt and slowly savoring every inch of your skin was a lot. and it didn't help that she started to kiss your neck, taking her sweet time to cover you with affection.

she trails up your neck, and soon she's kissing your jaw, her hand stationed at your waist. "you're so pretty. can't keep my hands off you, just wanna touch you all the time."

"abby..." you whispered, turning to give her a proper kiss. and that was all she needed. the way your voice sounded was like music to her ears, especially the way her name rolled off of your tongue and dripped like honey. heavenly.

it doesn't take long before you're on your back with her on top of you, her hand pulling your shirt up above your chest like she'll die if it's not off of you. it's so cute, the way her brows are furrowed while she kisses you, the small noises she makes that are just enough to tell you how bad she needed you. her touches are so gentle. she treated you like the most delicate piece of glassware yet she was so desperate for you.

her lips trail down, kissing down your sternum while she looks up at you with glimmering blue-grey eyes. she makes her way down your body, stopping right above the hem of your shorts. by this point, you your hear your heart thumping in your chest even over your thick breaths. "can i?" she asked, voice breathy.

you've never nodded and muttered a 'please' like that any faster.

it wasn't until you felt your shorts slide off and be carelessly tossed to the side that you noticed your show had paused and a large box of text popped up on the screen.

'are you still watching?"

#abby anderson #abby anderson fluff #abby anderson wlw #abby anderson x reader #the last of us abby #tlou #wlw #tlou2 fanfic #abby anderson smut #abby the last of us #i kinda cooked #abby tlou #tlou2

[r-is-typing]

an asset | s.r

summary: in which spencer saves the day

requested?: yes! requested by @night-sky-full-of-stars

request: hello beautiful, I wondered if I could maybe do a bit of a self-indulgent request because I’ve been feeling a bit down lately and can’t stop wondering how spencer would act in the situation 🥹 could I please request a spencer reid x reader (up to you whether she’s in the bau), where the two are either best friends or dating already and reader has a bad day and is made to feel really small by someone and spencer affirms her and cheers her up? adorable, shy spencer would be super cute 🤓 thank you!! 💛

pairing: spencer reid x reader

category: fluff

content warnings: descriptions of violence, little angst, degrading comments (in the form of sexism)

word count: >1k

Miami was hot and humid.

Spencer Reid made sure to tell everyone on the jet just how hot and humid Florida during the month of July was. Everyone rolled their eyes as he expressively talked everyone’s ears off, rambling on and on.

But, not her.

In fact, she craved the days they’d be alone in his apartment where they’d be alone, him able to tell her all sorts of facts that he knew off the top of his head without having to worry about Hotch telling him to stop firmly, or Prentiss putting him down easy, a way of trying to get him to quiet down and let them fly in peace.

This case was a hard one.

They had been in Miami for almost a week now, and boy, they weren’t even close to catching the unsub yet. “So, I don’t get it. Why is his MO changing all of the sudden?” One of Miami’s officers asked, looking around the room at the agents.

“It’s simple, really. He probably feels like he’s getting close to being caught, but I’d say in this case, he found a new, efficient way of killing.”

Despite the gruesome conversation, Y/N smiled softly, just like she did every other time her boyfriend said something so confidently.

Only her, Spencer, Rossi, and Hotch were at the police station as the rest of the team were either sent to the coroners office, one of the family’s homes, or the places where the bodies were found.

“I’ll be right back. Just going to the restroom.”

Y/N got up off of the chair, walking towards the door. “Well, sweetheart, while you’re at it, get us some coffees, will you? Let the men work this out.”

Y/N froze.

For anyone that knew Y/N, they knew that she felt quite… insecure. She was new to the team in the past two years, but has always been shy, not speaking up like the other women on the team had.

At her last jobs, she had experienced sexism just like this. Guys always tried making themselves more superior than her, a way of asserting their dominance.

It also brought her back to the academy days where cocky wannabe agents would look at her as if she’d break at any moment.

Y/N regained her movement and walked out of the room and towards the restroom.

Finishing her business, she walks out, eyes meeting a few of the other male officers. “Listen, sweetheart, Gary didn’t mean it.. well, sort of. You understand right?“ She raised an eyebrow in confusion.

“We’re just saying that.. you’re young, clearly, and very obviously a woman. You need the men in there to show you how it’s done, yeah?”

Y/N felt tears fill her eyes and she shoved past them, walking outside of the station.

“Darling?”

Spencer’s voice, filled with concern, alerted her. Footsteps became louder as they became closer. Spencer’s natural musk mixed with the scent of his cologne he put on every morning filled her senses.

“You know they’re wrong, right?”

Y/N shrugged.

Spencer grabbed her hand in his own, pulling her close to him. “They don’t know what they’re talking about. You’re one of the smartest women I know. One of the strongest, too.” He chuckled softly. “I mean, remember last month, in Washington? You basically solved the case on your own, my love. We wouldn’t have been able to catch him, had you not seen the clues he left behind at the crime scenes.”

She sniffles, rubbing her eyes with her fists. “I guess, but still. Maybe, I dunno, Maybe they were right.”

Spencer shakes his head, kissing the girl’s head. “You’re so smart, m’love, and I’m so proud of you, you know? You’re doing amazing. I mean, you’re such an asset to the team. An important one, at that.”

Y/N smiled at this.

Boy, was she lucky to have Spencer in her life to remind her what was really important, to show her that she was important.

Spencer took her hand, making sure she was okay before walking back into the station with her. The two resumed working, and before they knew it, the case was over.

On the flight back to Quantico, Y/N slept soundly, tucked into Spencer’s arms.

“She okay?” Emily asked, Spencer looking up and shrugging. “I think it just hurts her, you know? She works hard, and still gets belittled.” Emily nodded, understanding exactly how the girl felt.

Soon enough, the plane landed in Virginia and Spencer helped Y/N out of the jet. “C’mon.” He smiled at her, entangling their fingers.

“Are we going home?”

He shook his head. “Not yet, sweetheart. In just a bit. I know Garcia wants to see you.” Y/N nodded, stretching and then continuing to walk in sync with Spencer.

The two entered the round table room and Y/N’s eyes lit up. “Surprise!” Garcia quickly walked to Y/N, enveloping the girl into a hug. “What’s all this?”

“This, my sweetness, is for you. We don’t really show our appreciation for you enough, and Boy Genius made us realize that we should. I mean, most times, you’re the one that helps push us towards catching those awful people. We couldn’t do it without you, sugarplum.”

Y/N smiled, looking at everyone who said different things in unison, but all agreed with Penelope. “Thank you, Pen. Truly.” Penelope smiled once more.

“Now, you tell me if any other idiot says something about you, and they’ll have to deal with me, yeah?”

The room filled with laughter as they all stood there, basking in the close knit family that the team had made, knowing that every member was needed in every way, and the team wasn’t the same if any one of them were gone.

Each member had their own specific set of assets that were essential to bringing down the horrible people they witnessed on a daily, and that’s what made them a team.

One perfectly, functional, hard-working team.

#spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #criminal minds #request #requests open #rhyanwritesstuff #spencer reid one shot

[gingerjunhan]

Hello there! I would like to tell you I rlly like all the things you write! They're so cool! I rlly enjoy all of them! And I would like to be another anon! "🌺" it will be that emoji <3

And I would like to do a request too! Is about

How XH react if they have a s/o who's insecure about using their glasses

☆彡 ahh such a sweet idea 🌺anon :( I love it. Welcome to my anon list! Happy to have you here, and thank you so much for the love! 🩷

word count: 957 | pronouns used: none | genre: fluff, established relationship | cws: insecurities, reader is called “beautiful” a lot (my bad), if I missed anything lmk

goo gunil

Gunil, as a glasses wearer himself, might know where you’re coming from with this insecurity

so I think he would be great at helping you out!!

“I love your glasses! They draw more attention to your beautiful eyes!”

he would make jokes about it, but not rude jokes

stuff like:

“You can see me in all my glory!”

or, “I look better in 20/20 vision!”

silly stuff to make you feel better

but it’s not all unserious

if he can see that you’re really insecure, Gunil will absolutely take initiative to do whatever it takes to make you feel better

he doesn’t wear his glasses often, so maybe he’ll wear his with you so you don’t feel like you’re drawing attention to yourself?

he always compliments you so if you’re feeling down, so get ready for compliments galore

“I think you’re perfect no matter what, my love. I think your glasses look lovely on you.”

kim jungsu

I think Jungsu would absolutely SWOON for someone in glasses!!

imagine you’re sitting across from him, and you have to push your glasses up your nose, and he would just melt

he thinks you’re so cute, and the glasses only add to that cuteness

“I love your glasses! They look so nice on you honey :(“

I can totally imagine Jungsu cleaning your glasses for you every night before bed so they’re clean for you the next day :( ugh, it’s the little things

if you opt to wear contacts instead he would understand why, but he absolutely will not let your insecurities win!

so the next time you put your glasses on, it’s nothing but praise

“You look so good in your glasses! I think you should wear them more often!”

he truly believes that nothing can hinder your beauty so the fact that you think that is crazy to him

kwak jiseok

Jiseok strikes me as the type to also have a thing for people who wear glasses!!

we all know Jiseok is smart, but I can’t help but to think a goofy part of him links glasses to intelligence in his head

so when you tell him you feel insecure about wearing your glasses, he’s just like,

“But, they show people how smart you are!”

“Oh, so you think I look like a nerd?” (☝🏻🤓)

“Wait, baby, no!”

after clarifying over and over again that you don’t! look like a nerd, he’s back tracking and starting over again

“I don’t think you look like a nerd! I think you’re hot! Have I ever told you I have a thing for people who wear glasses? Is it hot in here?”

he’s blushing and tripping over his own feet

truly fighting for his life to get his point across

now any time you feel insecure about your glasses, you just think of Jiseok making a fool of himself because you flustered him too bad, and it makes you smile

so- in his own strange, roundabout way- he replaced a bad feeling with a good one!

oh seungmin

Mr. Fashionista, Oh Seungmin looks at glasses as the ultimate accessory

if you tell him you feel insecure about your glasses, he’s got it covered

he’s styling outfits that he thinks would look great with your glasses

and obviously, you’ve seen how he dresses, so you trust him

he knows it won’t fix your insecurities, but it can help with them!

so you dawn your outfit that he’s laid out for you, and once you start accessorizing?

he’s gone from fashion designer to cheerleader

“See! Your glasses are the perfect finishing touch to tie this outfit together! They look so good on you baby!”

you look in the mirror and you gotta admit…

you look pretty good!!

you’re grateful for his help, and he would gladly do it again if it meant slowly helping you gain confidence

han hyeongjun

quick side note to say that I absolutely 🩷adore🩷 Hyeongjun’s white frames! they look so good on him!

anyways

Hyeongjun knows insecurities can suck, especially if they’re ones you can’t really get around

like, you need to wear your glasses or else you can’t see. no ifs, ands, or buts about it

so he makes sure to tell you how good you look!

so maybe Hyeongjun isn’t the best with vocal praises, but he tries!

he’ll tap the frames of your glasses and say something like “looking good!” with a simple smile

you won’t be able to tell if it was a compliment, a pun, or both- but you appreciate his efforts

maybe he would suggest you both buy matching glasses?

that might sound silly, but if you love his glasses I think he would just suggest that you wear them lol

he just wants to help you feel comfortable or find something you feel comfortable in

lee jooyeon

I hate to say this this way, but Jooyeon wouldn’t get it

HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT—

you tell him you feel insecure and he just goes,

“🤨 why?”

he just doesn’t understand how you could feel bad about yourself???

you’re literally the most gorgeous human he’s ever seen so how could you possibly feel bad about yourself?

“I love your glasses, sweetheart! They look so cute on your face!”

if he notices that they’re crooked or something on your face he would fix them and go, “Gotta make sure my baby looks good!”

if he can tell you’re having a really bad day with your insecurities, he’s right there to help you

standing with you as you look yourself in the mirror, pointing out how good your glasses look

“They compliment your face shape so nicely. They make your eyes pop, and I love your eyes!”

he would be so sweet to you because he knows you deserve to be sweet to yourself :(

taglist: @dazzlingligth , @mini-mews , comment to be added!⁎⁺˳✧༚

#xdinary heroes x reader #xdinary heroes imagine #xdh x reader #xdh imagines #xdh fluff #ot6

[floating-above-sea-level]

General SecurityWaiter/DreamTheory headcanons cause I just love them (part 1 cause I will never shut up abt them)

+some other general fnaf movie character (Abby mostly) stuff but mainly still SW/DT related, random timeline order I’m just spewing

-Mike goes to Sparky’s before and after work. He gets coffee before work cause DUH, and then sometimes he’ll get a small breakfast/some coffee in the morning so he doesn’t immediately pass out after his shift. Thats how him and Ness met. First impressions were along the lines of Mike thinking that this waiter talks too much, especially for the hours it is, and Ness just think Mike seems interesting and mysterious (lowkey thinks he might be a cryptid)

-the SECOND Mike lets slip that he works at Fazbear’s Ness is OBSESSED with talking to him more. He already thought he seemed interesting but now he knows he works at the place that he’s being obsessing over for YEARS he is NEVER gonna stop asking him shit and infodumping (Mike finds this very annoying at first, but then eventually realizes that Ness does in fact know quite a bit abt Freddy’s which he finds interesting and helpful so he starts actually engaging in the conversation)

-Ness has asked Mike to take them to Freddy’s multiple times, he has yet to say yes (not like Ness hasn’t broken in before. They’re half the reason they needed a security guard)

-Mike is insecure abt the height difference (and his height in general) but Ness literally just wants to squeeze him and go like ubububbubububu ur so cute ubububbubububu (me)

-Mike is actually fairly strong cause he likes to work out (it’s a coping mechanism) so sometimes he picks Ness up (like bridal style and shit) and it lowkey gives him gender euphoria and Ness just fucking loves it it makes them so giddy

-I saw smth somwhere abt Ness possibly being Sparky’s owner’s son so I’m just gonna second that and say that that’s why he works there so many hours (aka he basically helps run the place) but it’s also why he can kind get off work whenever he wants

-Mike complaining abt this annoying waiter who talks to much and is obsessed with Freddy’s peaks Abby’s interest so she asks Mike to take her to Sparky’s and that’s how Abby and Ness meet (they become best friends ever and sometimes Ness takes care of her when Mike is busy)

-Abby has plushies of the fazgang and a collection of fazcoins and other collectibles that Mike got her from the prize counter (not like anyone else is using them) and she shows them to Ness who absolutely FLIPS OUT about it. She also uses the faztokens as money for when they play pretend

-MIKE has freckles NOT NESS because Josh hutcherson LITERALLY HAS FRECKLES THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT /hj /lh

-Ness has a cat named Skip (cause he’s literally just MatPat /hj)

-Mike has passed out at Sparky’s before (usually like Saturday mornings after his shift since he doesn’t have to worry abt taking Abby to school, I mean not like he does it intentionally but he’s less worried abt it so sometimes he just zonks) and Ness will bring him soft shit to lay his head on and then gently wake him up and offer him coffee, which he eventually starts giving him on the house (totally just cause they knows he’s struggling financially and NOT because they’re flirting /j)

-I LOVE the “Mike can’t cook and Ness loves cooking” headcanon so I wanna say that’s real, but looking at the movie, Mike’s been taking care of Abby for years and cooks dinner for them multiple nights, and Ness is a waiter…based on the information given, Mike would theoretically (hehe theory) be the one who cooks ☝️🤓 /hj

-Abby demands to paint both their nails. Ness more than happily agrees but Mike is hesitant (dysphoria and general “ugh little girl stuff” type energy) but she keeps asking so he lets her paint them black (cause that’s so edgy and cool and masculine /j) and he learns he actually likes it quite a bit

Ok done for now this is getting very long but I will have more don’t yall worry 🤗🤗🤗

#securitywaiter #dreamtheory #fnaf #fnaf movie #mike schmidt #ness the waiter #mike x ness #ness x mike #queer #trans #neurodivergent #audhd

[thawthebeez]

hey guys. tumblr user thawthebeez back at it again with yet another haikyuu essay B) the topic of today is one that i see NOBODY talking about which is crazy because this motif is (in my opinion) one of the main foundations of the kagehina community.

now may someone please explain to me why the HELL nobody ever talks about how whenever Tobio expresses an insecurity of ANY KIND, Hinata is ALWAYS the first one to swoop in and tell him not to worry about it?

yes, we've all established that Hinata Shouyou is the #1 Kageyama Tobio understander. we get that. BUT THIS IS ONE OF THE MAIN DISPLAYS OF THAT AND I'VE SEEN LITERALLY NOBODY SPEAK OF IT EVER.

i'm pretty sure there's an instance of it in season 2 (either that or my brain just made it up) when Tobio is a little worried about his and Hinata's quick attack not really working out but Hinata tells him "nah you'll figure it out eventually" or something along those lines. i'm not going to lose my shit over it because i can't find it but if you know YOU KNOW.

a part that i COULD find from season 2, however, was this:

here we have Tobio explaining how talented of a setter Oikawa is- how he's so much better than him- and it's clear that this is something he's insecure about given his facial expression.

THEN we have Hinata's INSTANT response:

and it blows Tobio away because WHAT

because, to paraphrase a little, Tobio basically just said "yeah oikawa can make any spiker look good no matter what team he's on" to which Hinata replied "yeah but that team wouldn't be Karasuno" which is essentially "Karasuno is strong enough as it is" BUT- if ur crazy- " dw he wouldn't take your spot babe" (<- which probably isn't how it's meant to be interpreted because they just finished talking about The Team That's Stronger As Six thing so like... context clues. it's probably not the insane interpretation).

ANYWAYS boom there it is. Tobio expresses insecurity, Shouyou swoops in and goes "Ermmmm Actuallyyyyy🤓" WHICH IS SO FUCKING ENDEARING ON IT'S OWN BUT THE FACT THAT IT HAPPENS MORE THAN ONCE AND AT SUCH A CRITICAL POINT TOO

the critical point in question being:

(context: Tobio just came back from his training camp in Tokyo and is a little frustrated because he's gotten so used to playing with other prodigies like himself so to go back to talented-but-not-prodigious players is a bit of a switch for him. don't get him wrong tho he loves this team to DEATH it's just a little different that's all. hashtag number one Tobio apologist right here)

SO THERE'S THIS! and it goes without saying that Tobio is DEEPLY insecure about his late middle-school days and being referred to as a king. Tsukishima adds a little salt to the wound and while I didn't take a screenshot of it Tobio makes this look of absolute HORROR after he says what he says

(which, side note, shows a lot of a character development within Tobio. especially since I've been flipping between season 2 and 4 a lot looking for these clips. Tobio didn't even notice when he was acting kingly before but he realizes it INSTANTLY now which is so so so good for him yayyyy character development!)

this also leads fantastically into my next tangent which is

TOBIO FUCKING APOLOGIZES!

now, admittedly this isn't entirely related to my thesis but i absolutely ADORE talking about this scene and i genuinely think it is one of the most prevalent displays of character development within Tobio because i feel like he tends to get overshadowed by all the other characters (especially Hinata, which i'm not upset about in the slightest like it makes perfect sense and if Tobio got all the attention all the time the show would be soooo unbalanced)

but I feel like a lot of people skip over Tobio's overall development over the course of the show. I mean compare s1 Tobio to s4 Tobio THAT IS NOT SAME PERSON ANYMORE. he grows so much over such a short period of time (which is another essay I could write. something along the lines of "Explaining Why Tobio And Shouyou Need To Be On Separate Teams Actually Because Character Development Purposes" because the amount of people i've seen on tiktok complaining about kghn being on separate teams and how they should just be on the same team forever makes my blood boil violently) and it's so refreshing to see Tobio's growth especially as a big Tobio enjoyer.

ANYWAYS back to the main thesis.

So Hinata steps in IMMEDIATELY here. literally cuts Tobio's apology off because HE HAS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR. he was expressing his thoughts whatever that's fine he could have done it in a nicer way SURE but listen the guy still has a LOOOONNNGGGG way to go but still, nothing to apologize for. it's just growing pains, y'know?

now the quote "What's wrong with him being the King again?" appearing here isn't the first time we're seeing this. Hinata has ALWAYS been confused as to why calling Tobio a "King" is a bad thing. literally from day fucking one Hinata was like "nah dude I think that title is cool" WHICH, AGAIN, TOBIO BEING INSECURE ABOUT SOMETHING AND SHOUYOU REASSURING HIM THAT IT'S TOTALLY CHILL HELLO?????

LITERALLY FROM DAY ONE SHOUYOU HAS BEEN DOING THIS. THAT MAN MAY THINK TOBIO'S AN ASSHOLE SOMETIMES (and he kinda is) BUT NEVER WILL HINATA INHERENTLY HATE A PART OF HIM. and i don't think they realize it here nor do i think the realization comes soon after but at some point there will be the realization that they love each other. every single part. fucking Tobio probably realized it way back in junior high but that's a tangent for another time.

now this line.... this one right here...... oh my god i can be SO NORMAL ABOUT IT.

the main reason why Tobio had this look of HORROR on his face after he yelled at everyone was BECAUSE HE KNEW THE ENDING. he knew that yelling at them would have consequences (if it weren't for Hinata stepping in thank god). HE'S SEEN IT ALL BEFORE. in his final year of junior high he yelled at his teammates to run faster and jump higher and be better AND THEY LEFT HIM!!!

so Tobio yelling like this instantly makes him afraid that he's just ruined the entire balance of the team. he thinks he's going to be left behind again because he yelled and everyone is going to leave him BUT!!!!!

BUT SHOUYOU IMMEDIATELY JUMPS IN AND SAYS "idc what u say honestly if i don't like i'm just not gonna listen" OR, TO TRANSLATE "i'm not going anywhere regardless of what you say"

Tobio's biggest fear is losing this team. I literally do not need to explain why. that man would fucking DIE for this team (if you really need an explanation just to go the end of the Kamomedai match when Tobio admits that he's upset they lost because he wanted to play with that specific team more).

and for Hinata to essentially say "you could literally be as kingly as u want and i simply would not care, pal, i promise you i am NOT going ANYWHERE!!!" which has got to be SO FUCKING RELIEVING FOR TOBIO.

(also something something "nobody was there" / "i'm here" something something "doesn't matter what kind of toss goes up if you send it my way i'm hitting it" something something they're soulmates or whatever they are literally bound together by the universe they were destined to be together and it's a crime that universe kept them apart for so long and now that they're together they will always BE together two peas in a pod literally inseparable they are hot glued and duct taped together.)

and then there's this. i mean at this point you already know what i'm going to say like you get it by now but again IT MUST BE SO RELIEVING TO TOBIO to know that shouyou thinks his biggest insecurity is cool. that shouyou thinks that it's not something to be concerned about. that no matter what, no matter how much a King he is, they're not going anywhere.

SOMETHING SOMETHING "you drew stars around my scars" IF YOU EVEN CARE

and just the fact that it's always ALWAYS shouyou to do this. the fact that there was dead silence before shouyou spoke up. the fact that it's ALWAYS HIM there to understand Tobio (someone who has been misunderstood for as long as he can remember) GOD THEY DRIVE ME INSANE.

anyways thank you for being a witness to this madness👍

#i know kagehina day was like 3 days ago LISTEN #i'll be there on hinakage day i promise #but again the fact that this is not as commonly talked about as it is is WILD to me #also the “Hinata and Kageyama need to be on separate teams actually” is an essay i think i will genuinely write at some point #just one more tiktok of people saying “noooo the boyfriendsss they need to be on the same team” and i'll do it i'll fucking do it #THEY CAN BE BOYFRIENDS AND BE ON DIFFERENT TEAMS PLEASE UNDERSTAND!!!!!!!!!1 #they needed to be on different teams in junior high for obvious plot reasons #they needed to be on the same team in high school for character development reasons #and they NEED to be in different teams going forward so they can continue to motivate one another #THEY ARE EACH OTHER'S GREATEST MOTIVATORS #there is nothing they love more than playing against one another like did you SEE the adlers v. jackals match HELLO #even when the adler's were LOSING tobio looked like he was having the TIME OF HIS LIFE #and you could tell that Hinata loved it too. not just because he was finally making up on that “i'm gonna beat u one day” promise #if they end up the same team forever they will just never feel that joy THEY NEED TO BE ON DIFFERENT SIDES OF THE NET I PROMISE #a net is not enough to stop a red string of fate #anyways #volleyball guys #wahoo another essay for the haikyuu tag!

[q1ngqve]

Helloo, its ✒️ again ahdhudbd. In celebration of Jing Yuan coming home l've returned with more rotsianudhdkn.

Obsessive!Jing Yuan with a Skittish!equally-obessive!Reader being childhood friends. Theyve kinda drifted a bit because of how Jing Yuan got busy and reader didnt want to impede. Yet reader has been with him through thick and thin, knowing him the most.

Id imagine reader stalks him, takes photos and evensneaking into his house to grab things for their altar(old shirt, their brush, ext.). They go so often thatMimi recognizes them (due to them wearing JingYuans shirts they've stolen) and will preen for affection. Unfortunately, reader is weak to Mimi and spoils Mimi with affection before stealing what they want and leaving. This even extends to the finches too, and they won't leave reader alone either.

(l'd imagine when reader visits Jing Yuans placeformally, Mimi is ALL OVER reader. It's to the pointthat Jing Yuan gets Jealous and pouty about it, buthe can't get too mad since he loves seeing thepeople he cares about being so close wnudbdn)

Readers too nervous to approach Jing Yuan aboutit, despite knowing eachother for so long. Readerbelieves that Jing Yuan wouldn't love someone "like them" and has planned to leave the Loufupermanently out of despair. With the chaos resulting from the stelleron, they sneak into his house one last time, to steal stuff and to saygoodbye to Mimi. The problem? Jing Yuan comes home earlier thanexpected after talking to Astral Crew of the Stelleron Crisis, catching them red handed. Petting Mimi, surrounded by finches and wearing his shirt. Where mere moments ago, reader had been confessing their insecurities and shame about their obsession with their "dad" for like Centuries. Even revealing that the real reason for leaving wasn't due to work, but because of Jing Yuan.

When jing yuan overhears that reader is permanently leaving the Loufu, hes quiet. Hes the reason that they were going to leave? After giving a confession like that? That won't do. He will not let his pretty darling slip out of his grasp, after waiting for so long.

I just want him to drown reader in so much of hislove that reader can't think badly of themselves. If reader can form a cohesive thought, objecting tohis praise and affections? He's not done.

I'd imagine Jing Yuan cooing as reader comes undone the nthtime, overstimulated and whining so prettily for him as he devours reader's sweet essance directly from the sourc I want him to whisper all the fantasies he's had about reader as he rails reader into his bed. HIM confessing the reciprocated obsession insudhdjbd aaabsudhdjdj

Centuries.. CENTURIES??? This man could have had reader in his bed CENTURIES AGO. All those late nights of thinking about reader. And finally having reader in his grasp? This is better than his greatest fantasies. Hes addicted and is going feral. This man is now on a personal goal of making up for all that time wasted 😳😳

(Can you tell 'm deranged for this man??? Im downhorrendous 😫😩 ! just need him to rail the insecurities out of me while loving me gentlyajsifnjdn)

(anyways thanks for reading the rots ahbdudjdin)

-✒️

✒️ anon back at it again with another masterpiece of a brain rot

also do we agree that he would be the more insane one? like we’re looking at reader’s pov here about how they’re obsessed and shit, but i just know jing yuan is even more obsessed than they are, especially since he waited for CENTURIES and he probably fell for you since the beginning 🤓 he just didn’t want to scare poor reader away :(

this was me the whole time while reading it

#love reading and giggling at your brain rots #they’re so unique and cute 🤭 #✒️ anon!!!!!

[absolutebl]

Hi 👋

I’d like to latch onto the previous ask (about uke and seme). One of the show I’ve been watching is My School President, and my amateur eye got a bit confused about dynamics. Maybe it’s just that seme/ uke dynamics aren’t there. But if they are, they seme to be a bit uncharacteristic. Particularly the seme character (which I presume is Tinn), who does “pursue” the uke, but I wouldn’t say has the overhand. Also the story is seemingly told from the seme’s perspective (unless they’re gonna do a Bad Buddy), which isn’t completely unheard of but an unusual in the otherwise pretty “traditional” plot. In short, this got me all sorts of confused. 🤔

So, to get to the point. In case of an uke, there’s a tsundere variant, where the uke is acting up. Is there a similar but reverse variant of the seme? (i.e.: a seme who’s hesitant to act, or to actively pursue, aka “insecure seme” 🤓)

Thanks in advance for your answer. And if I forgot:

Merry Christmas 🎄/ Happy Hanukkah 🕎 to all your followers (who celebrate of course)! 🎊

Kind regards,

— Thel. 💚

Is there a similar but reverse variant of the seme? (i.e.: a seme who’s hesitant to act, or to actively pursue, aka “insecure seme” 🤓)

Yes, and the result is usually Aggressive & Autonomous Ukes, or Ukes Forced to Undertake the Seme Role.

It's getting rarer now, as countries keep looking at each others BL, even Thailand is getting weaker Seme/uke dynamics. (One way to tell is the more matched in physical height and fitness the two leads are, the more likely to have a weak S/u.) Also the more we leave university the more "they just gay" we are gonna get. To be frank the S/u dynamic is immature and one note. 

That said Thai high school BL is about finding identity, it's coming of age, so they can also be a bit more messy in terms of the roles in the narrative that the characters are occupying, and that’s part of their charm IMHO.

GMMTV is using MSP to play with the idea of BL tropes. We see Tinn fantasize about wiping Gun's mouth (a seme loyal action) but then what happens next... 

Tinn maybe wants to be a seme but more importantly for this story, he just wants to be a boyfriend. He clearly doesn’t care what form that partnership takes, because he has no experience with relationships let alone the physical side of being gay. His fantasies are just around being WITH Gun somehow.

There is an innocence to his seme behavior, like he is performing seme because he thinks he is supposed to, but he honestly doesn’t care, he just wants to be close to Gun. You might be picking up on this aspect. 

Normally in Thai BL the semes CARE about being in charge, see Ai long Nhai or even Between Us, they are very firm and sure in their seme behavior. Tinn is not. He’s just gay and the character with the crush and therefore the one who has to act first. 

And he’s very bad at it. 

It’s fucking adorable and so teenager I can hardly stand it. 

#my school president #such a good series #thai bl #gmmtv #bl airing now #bl and seme/uke #seme/uke #asked and answered

[papa-evershed]

I don't know if you remember me going around 3 years ago, asking the people who had been in the Jon Bernthal fandom the longest how they got into him? Well, I'd love to ask you the same thing but for your charming RJC. What had you ditching (affectionately ofc 😆) Jon and even fellow Brit Andrew? Except the fact that he's one good looking fella 😁

Yes I remember!! I loved you for asking everyone that question because the answers were so fun to read. I legit enjoy learning what it is about a Fave™ that speaks to each individual person. 🤓

But I honestly don't know if I've got a cut and dry answer this time around. 😅 Normally for me to start ~liking~ an actor, I've had to have known about them for awhile, I need to already be familiar with them, I gotta "know" them (as much as we can), etc. You get what I'm saying. My faves typically have to grow on me. But this motherfucker? 👀

It was just an immediate click! I started watching Downton Abbey at a time when I desperately needed a good distraction from real life so it was a bit of perfect timing and I immediately zeroed in on his character Thomas. Like anyone does the moment they notice a good character with an unfamiliar(*to me) face, I googled the actor. And very, very, very, very quickly fell down that rabbit hole. Hyperfixations gonna hyperfixate!

I liked Jon for 7ish years and I used to tell anyone who would listen that he wasn't my type and it was true. Then I discovered Rob, who very much was my type, and bam! Not American, soft, very much the Dad™ type, just insecure enough to be endearing, great sense of humor, the list goes on. This isn't even counting the physical attributes—THE GREYS AND BODY HAIR. The belly. Makes a bitch feral. I suppose that's the gist of it at least. Just an almost instant, intense pull towards someone who was more my type. 😳😂

I'll shut up now because I can never answer with only a few words but I love this question and I legit love and appreciate you for always going out of your way to ask. Which reminds me! I know you guys still do Bernthal Events™ and this question always felt like it needed a day dedicated for it. Gifsets, fics, interviews, photos, just a day dedicated to whatever it was that attracted people towards Jon! Sorry, I just had to share that idea with you in case it could ever come in handy. I'mma shut up now for real this time. 🤓

#i know i'm not really in jon's fandom anymore but i still love y'all dearly ❤️❤️ #thank you for allowing me the chance to blab #you are a true MVP 💪

[gunsatthaphan]

Hallo Freundin! 👋

I will share my random ramblings with the class this time around. 😇 So here we go!

Okay, I’m going to put this out here. About Between Us. For clarity: I watched the Uncut Version. (My bank account is very grateful that Between Us is finally over. 🥲) So I don’t know how much and what got cut. But anyways, here are my two cents. Do with what you want. 😌

I don’t think Between Us was bad. Not at all. But if I am very honest, it did disappoint a little bit. (Which tbh, seems almost impossible to avoid with the enthusiasm and anticipation I felt about it beforehand. 🙈) Maybe it’s the extensive number of plotlines, or the fact that the main plotline felt a bit dragged on in the end.

But I think there’s also another reason. (And correct me if you disagree.) To me, it felt as if the stories were told in the wrong order. Particularly, the WinTul story was started way too late. So that when they had their resolution, it seemed unrealistically quick to me. In contrast, for some reason the romance between Manow & Pruek remained a storyline for the entire series. And I am seriously still wondering what was so pressing that it remained a “problem” to solve for 12 episodes. 🫠 It was also the weakest storyline because Manow’s insecurities were never fully elaborated on. And so it seemed to me like the odd one out.

I thought Bee and Prince had a really strong storyline. And both that storyline and WinTul’s created a strong parallel to the main theme (me thinks) of Between Us itself. While it doesn’t have the theatrics of UWMA, it does serve strong motifs about “finding yourself,” “forgiveness,” “feeling inadequate,” and “getting to know someone else.” Plus, more importantly: letting someone get to know you.

While WinTeam put up the question: how well do you know someone when there’s just the physicality? WinTul sort of gets the reverse question: how well do you know someone when you don’t know what they look like? The overarching idea is that you don’t, unless you take the time. But at the same time, you do, better than you think. The story of Bee and Prince gave a whole new spin on this story by inserting the issue of status and celebrity into the mix. And the contrast between the private person and the public persona (bonus points for getting real about the pressures of being queer and a celebrity).

Tldr: I would have started with Bee and Prince, then put in Win and Tul, and end with Manow & Pruek. 🤓

Oops, I’ll quit the rambling! 😅 I just cannot stop talking about this show. 😍

Love,

— Thel. 💚

hi there Thel!!! 💜

thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts!!

Generally speaking Between Us was a phenomenon for me because it had so many tropes & aspects that I usually don't like such as the mains not getting together until the last second, an abundance of side couples, characters acting juvenile, repetitive scenes & lines, certain stories going in circles etc. but for some reason none of that bothered me too much here? 

Like we had 5 couples which is usually way too much and not all of them were 100% satisfactory but I think they did a really decent job with giving them an equal amount of both screentime and development. WaanTul had the perfect slowburn for me and I'm okay with how they wrapped it up but the ending was not appropriate for the overall pacing. It went at 30% speed for 11.5 episodes and then it went to 100% within seconds lmao. That could've been handled a bit better imo. But as I said I'm okay. Also I don't think it was told in the wrong order. To me the narrative made sense and felt coherent but maybe that's not what you meant lol.

Manaow and Pruk had a good story setup but it remained a setup and was not delved into as much as it should have so I agree with you there. I still liked them and their energy a lot though. to be honest they might be one of my favorite het pairings in a bl. I really really like them and I would 100% watch their show if they had one. 

Prince and Bee did not catch my attention at all in the beginning. I had no interest in their story as I was over the celebrity x mundane trope and also I'm not a fan of Benz. BUT that changed towards the middle of the show. When they actually got together and specifically their conversation in the bathroom was where I was like okay. I like this lol. They had a very nice conclusion and their chemistry became a lot better over time. I liked it. 

So overall all of these little stories had their little flaws but they did good. And I agree with what you said about the plots fitting into the overarching theme of the show which is getting to know each other, letting others in and offering a safe space to the people you love because that was indeed the common ground for all stories. And it’s also something that wabisabi generally does very well with their shows imo. Most of their productions are similar and they’re known for their cheesiness lmao but they do offer a very heartwarming portrayal of relationships and friendships, also the antagonist not being a person but your own inhibitions is something I really like and they did an excellent job with showcasing that in BU as well. Which makes it a flagship wabisabi show in that sense but in the best way possible imo. It’s exactly what I appreciated about UWMA too. 

I ended up giving it an 8.5/10 which, considering I went in in zero expectations, is almost like hitting the jackpot lmao. I’m very happy with how it turned out and I’m glad we can talk about it here lol. 

thank you again for sharing and have a lovely day! 💜 

xxx

#between us #between us finale #reviews #opinions #final review

[prometheanglory]

helloooo it’s not quite new years get over here in america but i have some end of the year sentiments to get off of my chest before 2022 is up 🥸 this is rly long teehee

it’s been !! a really busy year!! oh my god i didn’t realize how little i posted until i saw my tumblr wrapped T_T honestly, at some point i wondered if it’d be for the best for me to formally announce a hiatus — some parts due to university and work, and other parts due to personal conflicts that made it difficult to feel confident or proud that i was creating.

it feels kinda weird missing vinh’s birthday for the first time in a while 😅 (granted, i drew something for it but i didn’t post it bc i didnt finish/i got nervous) .

moreover, it felt weird being so distant from twst and my own tumblr? admittedly i scared myself off from doing as much as i could this year, so i have less to physically show that i’m still around and i still care just as much as i did in 2019. it’s hard to do stuff that you like when ur in the constant process of shoving ur foot in ur mouth or feeling really self-conscious, or well. sometimes it’s just hard to not feel insecure about what you want to make and what you perceive other people expect from you?

i admit that i’m still trying to rebuild my foundations so that i can feel secure and proud of myself. it’s been a really, really long road to take but i have all of 2023 and more to orient myself. i’ve been trying to get into new things and explore new ventures, and that has been… a very nerve-wracking process for someone who’s never done anything before (did you know how many emails and phonecalls i had to make to get anything done/set up just to take commissions….. i’ll tell u what, it’s definitely over 10)…

all in all, i just wanna get back on the horse _(:3 」∠)_ i’ve been a bit of a ghost, but i’m still here. i still wanna thank everyone who still pops in every now and then when i pop up every once in a while 😅 i really appreciate you guys hanging around and everything yall do, especially as a community. i don’t think i’ve ever seen a more vocal oc community before? it’s an environment that i appreciate more than anything and i don’t intend to let my gratitude go unspoken for. you guys are really sweet and supportive, and god, i can’t keep count on my fingers for the sheer quantity of amazing creators that i’ve seen here. i hope that with 2023, i get my hands on a better time management schedule so that i can properly give back into the community T_T

well anyway, i planned to do this many months back — here’s a list of random stuff i’ve been working on throughout 2021-2022 that i meant to announce but i never got around to but hopefully it’ll come trickling out in 2023 🤭

new dorm incoming, and a (pseudo) new dorm project

new ocs approaching :-) some canon, some fandorm

diversify my posts a little…….. cannot promise that i won’t still spam vinhs but i can try 🫡

organize blog a little more

stagrove uniform+chara revamp / sprites

oc design + sprite revamps (sarge / lola / imp twins / holly / edgar /xuehai are the ones i have on hand rn, but everyone’ll get their turn 🤓)

potential new vinh sprite (since the july one was just drawing over the old one 🤡)

stagrove episode is being gradually picked up again

i swear to god i’ll go through my inbox

get into merch production (charms/posters/stickers… u know the deal)

get through commissions faster and more frequently T_T

try to do a new style of commission…? (community votes on a subject/character/etc and when the goal is met, the art gets published for everyone to see or smth)

do a follower milestone celebration (potential giveaway?)

i swear to god i’ll get to that malleus daki design.

if malleus works out i prommy i’ll do leona daki too

oc personality or matchup quiz

more fun/detailed oc reference sheets

oc masterlist + oc profiles on toyhou.se

incoming comic project and more to come hopefully

#did u guys know that i made this blog when i was a senior in hs and now i’m a registered senior in uni….. thats so fucked up #if this post doesn’t make sense its bc i woke up excessively fond and sentimental and needed to spew my brain before i lost my words/courage #v speaks

[chelleztjs18]

Happy new year! How u r doing?

I'm all good hahaha I am also returning to my diet and gym routine after all the food I had during the holiday. I mean you are not wrong vacations were meant to loosen up a little bit

It's a long break indeed, and I'm starting to get bored haha I'm kinda a homebody so very unlikely to have other fun plans... probably going for drinks w/ work colleagues at some point but that's all

Oooh, I can only imagine, I like reading fics w/ sexual tension lol I had a really good time reading that one. Will definitely read the Nat one (I was on some kind of hyper-focus on Wednesday stuff but already missing reading mcu stuff hahaha)

About my writing adventures yep the first one is a mcu fanfic and yep I posted it this weekend its called You Are In Love (I am still a little self-conscious about it but it is out) I already have other ones in progress lol my brain has been working non-stop but I still need to work through my perfectionism and insecurities about my writing. Maybe you have any tips on how to deal with those? Anyways, If you got the chance to read it feedbacks are very well accepted 😅

Salutes 🤓

Hello hello!

I'm terribly sorry that it took so long to reply this. A lot has happened this month and it was kinda hard for me and put me into a mood swings.

how's everything with u? has the diet been going okay? I havent done my diet. when i'm stressed i tend to eat n snack sometimes. lol.

hows your school break? been having fun? i forgot, what do you do for work?

haha yah, writing fics with a lot of sexual tension is always fun. i really enjoy it. no pressure on reading it. u can read it whenever u can.

yay congratz on ur first fic! oh yes, for sure. once i get the chance to read it, i would. dont worry! and will for sure let u know what i think about it. i'm excited for u! yaaayy! so proud!

Cheerio!

#chellez answers #marveloussimp #lovely mutual

[spikebhm]

hey dude! I used to be fatwitch before I got insecure and deactivated :/ glad to see you're doing alright and bigger than ever!

Glad to have you back! I followed you already a couple of days ago 🤓 Hope your time staying here is better then last time! 😇

#ask spike

[mtnkat3]

Good morning my precious beloved Bears .. Angels .. I hope you .. had a good night's rest.

So many thoughts & feelings this morning I feel like that! But trying to organize enough to write you . . . . . It's a bit jumbled right now.. so please be patient with me. Chewing my lips.

I have been having nightmares & weird dreams. Well.. most of my life. That's taurine & gaba deficiency. But. I believe when we are ok. .. They are full of us & love. Because they are! Love those nights! I wake up with a smile & feel so surrounded by your love... the world could implode & I wouldn't care.

But when I feel insecure & unsure & well totally outta the loop.. I get anxious. It's not just a midnight phenomena either. Struggling to understand where & how I fit into your life... leaves me feeling unworthy & unsure of myself.

May be because of the weather changes, that I'm more susceptible to the adversary tricks attacking me. I mean the adversary knows what bothers me.. my chubby tummy.. needing reconstructive surgery.. my suffering health.. but mostly.. it's my feelings of inadequacy because I've been taught to feel...less. that I'm not smart enough, pretty enough, but too much in everything else. That I wasn't meant for a true love. but rather to settle foe someone to support me. I should just get a little job to occupy my time & not expect babies nor to be wanted by my spouse. It really does a number on my soul. My mom says those things to me. Hard to build a wall against my mother. But seems the only way I can heal is to face & accept that... I have a difficult parent. And I will never receive a mother's true love from her. Sometimes.. it manifests in such horrible ways..

Makes it so difficult to see what you .. see.. in me. I believe you . . . . . Just hard to get it into my head. For it to restore & encourage me. The way God means it to. The phrase "love yourself first" comes to mind. And I just don't understand how. I have confidence in myself, my abilities, that I'm capable. But.. that. I gotta see what I can read & definitely need to pray on this.

[Getting lag so gotta close. Tumblr & network issues probably.]

I mean I also have been wanting to write to you .. a love scene that's been in my head well.. years.. kitchen sink. Slow blushing shyly grin. It hit me like well.. you... my hurricane. My Bears Angels .. That one got me yesterday ~11am. You . . . . . Hhhmmm.....

Ok. Before I lag myself to death. And start going there..

I love you .

Even when.. I'm confused.. outta the loop.. scared.. thinking bad thoughts about how could what I'm thinking possibly be. But I know it is. In my soul. I know it. In my soul, my instincts, intuition.. you ..... you want & crave me .. just like I'm squirming for you ... right now. You make me shiver... always have. But do I...you...???

Chewing my lips.

I won't give up. I believe. I work. I await.

~True love never dies & true love always waits.~

Your confused, struggling with it all cause I'm outta the dang loop! But..listening. sigh.

Your complex quirky warrior queen daughter.

~Tijgeress kat Phoenix. ✝️🌺🐾🐯

🤓⚓🙏🙇‍♀️⛓🧰🥮🍯🍼

⌚💡⚡🌠🔱⚜🗝💝🐻🦌🧩♠️♾🧭🕯

Fr.12.2.2022 10.44am est. Damn lag.