#i dont know what else to call him because just calling him doctor doesn't make it clear to which one im referring to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mazeinthemiroh · 2 years

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Hiii! Before i request I hope you're doing well and you're talking care of urself 💞. Okay, so this might be a bit of a weird rqst but im on my period n i just thought of if my tampon gets stuck 🥲so i wonder how skz would react for you told them that happend, as a prank. Keep in mind, if this topic makes you feel a kinda way, you dont have to do it but if you agree, take your time. Thank you Stay😭💞

stray kids reaction when their s/o plays a tampon prank

genre: crack, suggestive?

word count: 0.8k

warnings: mentions of periods/tampons (obviously), cursing

author's notes: don't worry this topic doesn't make me feel uncomfy! as a pad-wearer, i have only ever heard of such concerns with tampons. i think i would share the same concern if i used them, and i know you're not alone in feeling this way. anyways, hope you enjoy this!

bangchan

best boy channie did research on periods and sanitary products because, you know, he loves you and wants to be well equipped with the knowledge to help you out! so when you tell him your tampon is stuck he's concerned. he starts packing an emergency bag full of idk sanitary products, medicine, snacks and a stuffed toy probably. "we need to go to the hospital, now" he will say and grab your hand, dragging you to the door. "chan i was only joking" you say with a chuckle as you pull him back. he stares at you in disbelief "why?? oh my gosh y/n seriously, you got me all concerned!"

minho

your first mistake is ever thinking you can prank lee minho. "babe my tampon is stuck." "oh." oh? wdym oh??? you try and keep your cool because you know he knows lee knows about tampons so his lack of response kinda pisses you off. "that's bad." "well no shit-" "anyways want to order some pizza," he says with a very nonchalant expression. throughout this whole time he hasn't looked up from his phone once. "do you not care about me," you say, half angry half sad, giving him a pouty voice. "i know you're lying you idiot. i always know when you're lying because you suck at it."

changbin

he takes it as a challenge tbh. "do you want me to help? i might be able to get it out." "wtf no???? no way." "WHAT I'M JUST SAYING I'M STRONG, IT MIGHT BE WORTH A TRY??" he says defensively, before folding his arms and looking thoughtfully, trying to scan his mind and figure out a solution. "well what do we do?" he says with a slight pout, mad at himself for not knowing how to solve this. with changbin you manage to string the prank out for a long time until he finally catches on that your lying. then he just looks at you like -_- while you laugh at him.

hyunjin

this drama llama is malfunctioning big time. "are you gonna die??? oh my god, oh my god." he shoots up from his seat and starts flapping about the room like a maniac. it takes everything in you not to burst out laughing. grabs the phone to call the emergency services because he doesn't know what else to do?? "hyunjin stop!! don't do that, you crazy person!!" "but yo-" "i was only joking. it was a prank!" you say to him with wide eyes, a nervous giggle coming from your lips. let's just say it takes a couple of hours for pouty hyunne to stop sulking.

han

he kinda freaks out about anything to do with periods. anytime you mention something period-related he's a bit 😖 not because he is ignorant or anything, it's just a bit out of his comfort zone for now. so when you tell him your tampon is stuck, he's a bit like :0 doesn't really know how to react. "o-oh, uh... that's... that's great honey." "wha- no jisung its a bad thing 🧍" "OHHHH oh no that's not good i'm so sorry baby :(" you end up just laughing your ass off at his totally random reaction.

felix

your superior acting skills make it seem like it's a really bad situation and felix is obviously super concerned, poor baby :( he feels so unprepared for this but also so ready to help. will do anything for you, just say the word. "does this mean you have to go to the doctor? i will come with you :(((" his kindness and worry makes you instantly regret doing this prank on him because it wasn't worth seeing him so concerned and upset. you must give him lots of cuddles and kisses when you tell him it's a prank, and tell him he's the best boyfriend ever <33333

seungmin

he's honestly more confused than anything else. will keep asking question after question about this. "so it's stuck?" "yep." "how did that even happen?" "it just did. the string broke, it happens sometimes." "but it's dangerous isn't it? it needs to come out." "that's correct." then he's just like 🧍‍♂️ he has no idea what to do so just stays silent for a bit, sort of avoiding eye contact with you while he stares off into the distance. you end up rolling your eyes and just telling him, and he does not look impressed!

jeongin

jeongin doesn't have much experience with periods in general. like he certainly knows they exist but other than that his knowledge is pretty limited. so when you come to him all like "my tampon won't come out", at first he's like wtf is a tampon?? and then clocks that it's something to do with your period and he's like, "oh... is that... a bad thing? it's a bad thing right?" and you just look at him like?????? "yk what nevermind," you sort of give up on the whole prank.

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dustmint · 4 months

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Random doodles of my Tgs oc bc yes

Below the read more basically a rant with a bunch of info abt him

(Also if you were that one person who saw one of the two times i accidentally published this I am very sorry)

First of all, Basic info about him

It's name is Michael Pepper, he's around 20 years old, he's agender and aroace (Because I can, He also uses He/It and ocasionally They for reasons I will later give) He used to be a lab experiment (I dont know if that's the word) and he would be a crypto biologist

So, before he joined The Society he worked/helped a guy (neutral) called Dr Indigo Lief (another alternate version of an oc! I sure have a lot of these guys) with their experiments after the person who used to work with them died, the person who died and Indigo used to work trying to make potions but with Michael they basically studied different types of creatures and animals, things like that but they also experimented on Michael

A bunch of this experiments left Michael with things like the flowers (They are a part of it and can't be cut off) Its eyes and hands being like that (He has better vision than most and if he touches any plants with his hands then they wilt/die) In the last experiment they did, Indigo basically injected Michael with a "parasite" (They didn't tell Michael what it was just said 'Its better if you don't know')

Now, one thing about Indigo is that they're a shapeshifter and was interested in "Hey, what would happen if I basically made part of myself into a liquid, then mixed it with a bunch of stuff and injected it into a person? wouldn't that be crazy?" and that was what they injected Michael with, and then some days later they dissapeared

Michael then just decided to say "Fuck this" (It should have said that way before this) and decided to join The Society

Onto the more Tgs related stuff

Michael immediately upon joining was basically interrogated by Jekyll who was somewhat very concerned about what was going on with all that stuff, Michael told him some of the stuff and Jekyll offered to do a check up on him but Michael just said no, he doesn't have a good relationship with doctors and it would not trust Jekyll that much

He would have joined a bit before Jasper, As some of the doodles say, it usually prefers to just listen to people rather than talk so he would get along well with some of the more talkative lodgers but also in my mind it would get along well with Ito, Majaibi, Sinnet and also Flowers, also in my mind pretty much all of the lodgers know some basic info about what happened to it because whenever one of them asked Michael would just say "Don't let people experiment on you" or something like that

Also he is definitely very much permanently banned from Bird and Archers Lab because of the plants dying when it touches them

Whenever Jasper arrives Michael definitely would try and befriend him, I think it would be one of the few times that Michael would actively try to make friends with someone because it doesn't like most people but Michael would be excited to try and talk to someone who would be interested and know similar stuff just like him who wouldn't try to experiment on him

Also, with the Frankenstein stuff, I think he would be a part of the 'Easygoing' lodgers who went along with Frankenstein because everyone else did or wouldn't really care about her

Some last stuff, Indigo dissapeared because they're now is basically inside of Michael, Most of the time they just exist inside their mind while not doing anything, just sort of watching Michael live its life, Some rare days they can go out and try to do their own stuff for a few days before they have to go back (Even if they are a lot shorter than before because of not having all of them) (Also, in that time they decided to help The Society and be one of their patrons) The rest of the time they can sort of possess Michael's body

One of the main differences between Possessed Michael and Normal Michael are that while being possessed, their eyes change from having a black sclera and off-white/pastel pink irises to an indigo sclera and golden irises, their hair becomes more red-ish, and also the air around them when possessed has a lot of static because of some stuff with Indigo (that I wont explain because that would mean getting into the Indigo lore and if I do that this end up way more long than it already is) and because of that their hair does that thing where it goes up, and they don't have to touch plants to make them die, just be near them

And that's all :D! That ended up being kinda long but that's pretty much all of it, im pretty sure I forgot some things but I'll leave it at that

#the glass scientists #tgs jekyll #tgs jasper #they are there #tgs oc #oc art #Michael Pepper #im gonna make him a tag since I'll probably end up posting about his original version some day and maybe more about him in general #Dr Indigo Lief #and also that bitch i hate them and love them a lot and they are also technically there #I am so attached to this oc I have him since a lot of time and it's definitely one of my favourites #if i ever say that I don't have any favourite ocs its a lie Michael will always be one of my favourites it's just that it #yes #again very sorry to that person who saw one of the two old posts about this guy (neutral)#also sorry for the long post I have a lot to say about my ocs🧍#i am normal about my ocs even if they are alternate versions #dustmint draws

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beeben · 1 month

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So I was going through some Krieg fics on AO3 and found your story "Monstrous"... Fuck that hit way too close to home. It was so amazingly written, I can sympathize bc I suffer with self loathing in my worse times, some of it was like seeing my own thoughts written out in front of me. I'm 1000% going to be reading Paging Doctor Samuels once I get the time to, I can tell its something you've had a passion for based on how much content you have going for it. Keep up the amazing writing 💙

AUUUUUGHHH THANK YOUUU monstrous is honestly one of my favorite things ive ever written like i poured my GUTS into that thing brother. I try so hard to capture him right. Hes always been a challenge for me because of a few reasons, i try to keep his thought patterns as realistic as i can with also acknowledging that hes like. Not normal yknow??? I don't like going oh psycho krieg sane krieg babbling back and forth i dont think real people work like that (even in someone with DID. I don't think he does have DID i just think he has a compartmentalized personality and schizo-affective disorder.) I don't like saying a specific disorder because i think that ties him too much to real life and it devalues people who have like schizophrenia or bipolar or other real cluster b personality disorders.. i dont think its right to add a real label to a character they specifically made to be an ahhh crazy psycho dude...... THAT BEING SAID! i think he (especially in the dlc) is one of the more respectful renditions of a severe mental illness that ive seen and i do want to keep him in that vein of believability.

Him saying "my other self" is referring to what everyone thinks is psycho krieg, but to me when I look at that, its not different from him. He says "my other self" to distance himself from things he finds revolting/stuff hed "never do". I think his body image is one of the leading things that effect this and thats kinda why i wrote this. He looks in the mirror and he doesnt see himself. He sees a thing that someone else made and attached his soul to. a lot of what i focus on with him is the acceptance stage in grief, i think thats the hardest part and people definitely back track a lot.

Hes grieving his past self. Its a big issue for him. He misses something he doesn't remember, and thinking of it for too long scares him. He feels stuck. He feels stupid. He feels like hes lost.

Mayas kinda like an anchor for him. Not in a manic pixie dream girl type of way- i dont think either of them see her as that- but like a support system. Everyone benefits from someone who can ground you during a crisis and i don't necessarily think it has to be a romantic partner but in this case it is, cus she knows him well enough and she sees and can identify the signs of him when hes going through it.

Krieg to me is a very private person. He puts on a persona to people for defense. The fact that Maya can see right through it makes him WILDLY uncomfortable. Cus he's always been taught that in order to be a good partner for someone (a man with a woman specifically) you cant act dangerous or threatening at all to them or else its predatory and youre seen like an abuser. He thinks his whole being is dangerous. Its not really that he struggles with masculinity, thats not a problem for him really its more like hes been told that he SPECIFICALLY is undesirable, he specifically is overly violent, hes too big, hes too unhinged to be in a healthy relationship with a woman. (This goes back further than the experimentation i feel like his mother specifically had something to do with his self image + why he became a mercenary in the first place.)

Maya doesn't care about that. Shes had like . 0000000001% of the romantic/sexual experience that he's had she does NOT know what a typical relationship looks like whatsoever. She doesnt even call him her boyfriend she doesn't define relationships like that at all. They're partners thats what she sees. Theyre equals to eachother. Mayas just as if not more fucked in the head as he is, and twice as dangerous.

She'll support him through anything he needs and she loves him for his uniqueness and his roughness and his WHOLE personality not just what he thinks is likeable about him. His thought process getting with her started as " she can see that deep down im not a monster" to "shed still be there even if i was a monster and still feel the same way" its subtle but its emotionally wrecking to him because that means she's really not there to coddle him. Its not tough love like you and i would say necessarily but he has this image in his head that if he found true love hed go "back to normal" and if he doesn't then hes not trying hard enough. He's gotta accept he'll never be normal and that's completely fine.

With that though comes loneliness. Even if he accepts hes different its still very isolating. It doesn't have to be though, especially in borderlands.

Krieg is still human. Thats probably the most important thing to me. He looks a little funny but his heart beats red blood and his head is full of deep philosophy and love and emotions that only people can experience.

Sentience is a blessing and i feel like he needs to learn that that blessing includes him :) thanks for reading.

#me rambling #borderlands #krieg the psycho #maya the siren #psyren #now pds is a different story thats Mayas Story #his part of it i still think holds these themes but its definitely mostly about her #i can go into that more later if you want but if you havent read it yet i wouldn't want to spoil #thanks for sending this btw it makes me feel warm inside

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bytchysylvy · 5 months

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BODY THOUGHTS ESSAY PART 3/3

SOU CAST

(they werent meant to be spoilers but i forgot to mention it before so now its going to feel like a punch i guess, brace or dodge bitch)

rydara has a lot of mixed emotions because on one hand, he is soft and buff just as the vazuvyn ideals predicted, but on the other he is highly influenced by mortal media which looks at his build and the general largeness of vazuvyr with disgust. Dont even get him started about being a trans man while being the last child of udysna in a matriarchal society we dont have time for it. He is deeply insecure about his body and the binge eating problem isn't helping.

dathevar likes to think himself as the worlds fattest fuck and hopes to get fatter actually. his weight grounds his telekinesis and makes him literally, measurably more powerful than you could ever know. Hopes you bully him for it too because thats his kink. We are dealing with a sick fuck pervert here and we are all trapped on this planet with him.

vokutlvek has what theyre calling "post occupation syndrome" which is a self explanatory catch all diagnosis. For him it looks like his heart randomly giving out and fainting, chronic fatigue, the inability to get the strength he once had back, and erectile dysfunction. Only the other syrodsik and a few doctors know about it, he's too insecure about what's going on with him to be open about it. The fact he isn't as lean as he used to be gets to him despite the fact that most vazuvyr who lived through the occupation are now chubbier than they were before it, and its seen as a good thing, because to him its a reminder of whats going on. His body takes up more space now and he has nothing to show for it. Fears one day all his strength will be gone and he will be a useless drain on his kin.

azrem is a typical anorexic. Granted it comes less from a place of appearance and more that he is hypersensitive and gaining five pounds will feel like carrying a small child on him. And he already feels weak tired and exhausted for reasons no one could possible know so he cant afford to carry around more weight. While his appearance is very much not the vazuvyn ideal for a man he knows there is a subset of those who like his body type (such as his husband) and he tries his best to stay all dolled up to maintain that boytoy look.

qamkii is a perfectly plump little juicy pear of a man. he knows what he has. no notes.

medinyolv suffers from the dysphoria of wanting to turn themself into a dragon or perhaps a griffin. Outside this, they do not think much of their body except for how annoying it is to be so, so tiny among these giants. Its hard to let beauty standards get to you when you literally do not have a body like everyone around you.

udysna much enjoys being big and soft. its not that deep, she likes to roll down hills and likes having all the cushion she can have. she doesn't think, let alone about what mortal's think of her body.

norket knows he is a creature of great beauty and should never hide

the feelings silence has toward his body are beyond words, neither in a positive or negative way just. weird to exist like this but completely natural to do so

debatable if unknown has a body but if they do then its perfect

raqa is the most insecure specimen known to science. she could blow away in the breeze at any moment and is constantly aware of this. thinness being favored by mortals doesn't make her feel any better, vazuvyn women don't look like that, they arent skinny, who wants skinny bitches. she doesn't. she was spotted in seattle in need of a fat bitch.

panatyl loves her body because she will use it to tear you apart. doesnt know who attractiveness is or what it is.

glydenoras is ok. She's at an age where she has her clique of people who are attracted and available to her. Doesn't need much else other than that. Gets a little annoyed that people will think she's pregnant and ask considering how much trauma she has around it with all but one of her children being dead.

kudelsa has the benefit of being an age-old beauty ideal. Full hourglass figure complete with a thick waist. Of course she has a good relationship with her body. Though she keeps her attire reserved because its something sacred for only a few worthy of it. Her body is a temple, she takes care of it like one.

buvikiro is in the same boat but also is a beauty ideal for mortals since he has that stupid tiny waist. Knows she's a sex symbol to both mortals and vazuvyr dresses to appeal to both groups. Her body is an amusement park, open to anyone who can pay the fee.

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weathernerdmando · 10 months

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I told my dad recently that I was looking to get evaluated for ehlers danlos because it would explain a lot and his reaction at first wasn't the best (it's honestly a little fucked up what he said but i saw where he got it and he did basically apologize for implying it) but once I actually got to explain why he seemed to get it. At first he was like "why do you want to get all these labels and to stand out and like I sort of get the perspective but now that I am actually chronically ill I just want to be healthy" and like I get it, I do, but I think what he didn't understand is I don't want to "stand out".

The problem lies in that I already do. The autism and ADHD alone already make me "unique" or whatever enough. It's not that I want. Its not that I want to be sick, I dont.

I just...i already am, or at least, have things wrong with me that haven't had answers so far for my entire life.

It's that I don't want to be alone. It's that I want to find other people who share similar issues who I can finally say "there's an answer to these random, seemingly unconnected, pain in the ass issues and other people understand it finally".

It's knowing I've always been medically complex and that apparently just kinda got forgotten/ignored because I thought most of it was normal because I didn't really know much else and once things were initially "dealt with" we kinda just moved on and if we needed to make accomodations we did but we just slid them between everything else and it was like they were always there before.

I know I've always been medically complex, but I didn't know that I wasn't the only one dealing with these issues and maybe some of it *is* fetal alcohol related but I don't see those things in me much at all, and even if it is a factor it doesn't explain the things I'm looking for answers for.

I'm not looking for a diagnosis for the hell of it. It's not for another label to slap on, it's not another "fun little trivia piece" or whatever you want to call it.

It's getting answers and ways to deal so things cause me less pain and I can stop being exhausted 90% of the time and maybe only be tired to exhausted 70% (50% is optimistic I think, lol). It's maybe maybe maybe finding out why no matter what I do, how much more I eat, how much I try to remember to eat, why i cant gain weight, why I can't get the body signals that signify hunger like I should be, it's maybe getting a path forward to a healthy weight for the first time in my life. I've never hit 3 digits and I *should* be and it's not intentional at all, I try and try and try but I simply can't and getting some reasoning as to why?? And maybe finding ways to get there?? That's what I want.

It's finding another person who's ribs move like mine in a way they really shouldn't and the relief in knowing "this person has an Official this is something wrong diagnosis and they share this trait with me and I finally have confirmation that this *should* concern me a little" but that there is also an explanation for it too.

I just want to be able to do things, accomodations or otherwise, somewhat normally for once. I'm used to accomodations, they've already been present in some way throughout my entire life. I wanted to be normal for a long, long time and I'm never going to be. I know I'm not like most people. I know that.

I don't want to be normal. I'm not ever going to be. What I want is to find other not normal people like me who I can say "this is happening and it hurts" and get a "yeah, same, you're not alone" response from or maybe "Here's things that have helped me, maybe talk to your doctor about them" and "Yeah, no, you're not overreacting to that being painful or weird or whatever, that's not something you should be able to do".

I'm not looking to stand out but to some extent, blend in and have a chance to finally just rest for a second or two.

I told him some of this, summarized really, and he kinda sat for a second, and I think understood what I was saying. And he said "I'm sorry you've been dealing with all this and I didn't realize."

So I think he understood why, in the end, but still. It's nice to lay it all out in the end anyways.

#personal shit #tagging to track comment reblog whatever lol #weight mention #ehlers danlos #hEDS #probably

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invisible-brandy · 4 months

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i low key never thought id be able to get invested in like an action scene that happens entirely with ships in space and no physical conflict and then boom star trek

or in short, i watched the doomsday machine

and im foaming at the mouth what the fuck was that i loved it

first of all, that doomsday machine is a girl to me and i bet she's lonely and tired. her hull looks like it's scarred and battered and i kinda dig it a whole lot.

then we have commodore decker who seems like an asshole but also is clearly deep in the grieving process bc of losing his crew and ship and obviously you immediately draw parallels between him and kirk and wonder if he'll end up in a similar situation. but also obviously you know he won't - not here immediately - because it's 60s tv and you still have more than an entire season left of the same crew. but the tension is still built so well. and the palatable strain when decker assumes command - during that whole conversation between him and spock everyone else on the bridge is just like 💀👀💀 sulu not moving a muscle when decker first tries to command him to attack sent me

like look at him (unrelated but also. pretty)

also i full on snorted when decker basically told kirk to stop with his fucking theories, because. well BECAUSE. because that man did just decide to theorise about the killer robot that is on its way to destroy their galaxy in front - took like three steps away, okay - of a man who just lost his crew to said robot. like, sure, it might be helpful to know your enemy but the majority of people probably sees it as "good lord what a fucking nerd" especially when its like here, it doesn't gain them much to know that its a doomsday machine. doesn't make it any easier to beat. and then in the end kirk runs to the bridge - after almost dying - and in literally five seconds starts getting all philosophical. like girl. and spock eats it up too, of course he does.

also, this. like okay i admitted to myself i would not be immune to this man a long time ago but still. jesus fucking christ. get your whore eyes out of here.

and then there's also spock repeating "mr.scott" like 4 times when usually he doesn't repeat himself. and no it's not because scotty isn't answering, which - of course he isn't, it's good he isn't, it somewhat annoys me when in these sort of time sensitive situations in movies people take their sweet time to talk as if the seconds aren't ticking. he's repeating it just because <3 he's worried <3 mkway.

also bones really likes to say "im a doctor not a..." doesn't he. fighting the urge to start calling him something like a grumpy kitten but also. should i even bother. he is a grumpy meow meow.

SPEAKING of mccoy. his love language is just insults, he gives his sarcastic remarks on the way spock phrases things but still fully expects him to stay in command and is outraged at decker taking over. which feels to me like an improvement since the ...i dont remember... the shuttlecraft episode. Galileo 7? i think.

anyway. love him.

also something something miracles "you worry about your miracles, scotty, ill worry about mine" "you almost make me believe in miracles, mr.spock". sigh. i think ill be forever thinking about that. as well as the probability bullshit spirk like to pull, jim asking something or stating something and spock giving him full numbers. i cant decide if its cutesey calming each other down jim finding comfort in the reliability or if this is equivalent of foreplay

cough cough

okay i think im. done. nothing to say about the mobi dick analogy, not really, because 1) i haven't read mobi dick in full so like. maybe point 2 is this way just bc im not familiar with the source 2) its kinda a weak analogy, no? i didnt quite catch it until i scrolled through the wiki, and to me it looked more like in the end there decker was suicidal, not vengeful. i dont think he was thinking much about damaging or not damaging the robot

#me when im supposed to be writing essays on russian folklore:#hold my tea mug i got one for star trek #if i finish uni its gonna be a miracle #watching star trek #hdgh.txt

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loveu001 · 2 years

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chapter two

last paragraph from last chapter for recap::

At work the next day, you tried your best to cover up the bruises and cuts. They still stung. Even with the pain killers. I guess he meant it when he said he was gonna make your life hell. Because this sure hurt like hell. You were hurting all over. So badly it felt painful to even walk or sit down. No one even seemed a little concerned. Peter had got in late. He couldn't even see the cuts because you covered them so well. You had gotten so good at covering them because this had happened so many times. You were ashamed of having this talent. You were never supposed to get this good at it. But he had noticed that you were limping a bit. “Oh my love.. Who did this…?” he whispers, so no one else would hear. “..” you stayed silent. You were so scared to say who did this. Besides, he doesn't even know you have a boyfriend. (if you would even call it that.) He looks you in the eyes and gives a soft smile. “Don't tell me you tripped or some bullshit story. Darling, please tell me who did this to your beautiful body.” You were terrified of him. You had known Mark for years. It didn't start off like this though. He used to be so sweet and comforting to you. He had always made you think that its your fault that he was like this. And you did think that.

chapter three |

You didnt know what to do. You were unsure if you should tell him or not. Its such a scary feeling. I mean you both trusted each other. Its just.. There was a voice telling you not to. Youve always had a problem with overthinking shit. So you just decided to not tell him. “Listen, its fine if you dont want to tell me. Its just im really worried about you. Youve been showing up these past couple of days with your bruises getting worse and worse. You need see a doctor for these, bunny.” You almost bursted into tears right on spot. He was being so sweet and supportive to you. It made your heart flutter. Tears started to form in your eyes. You felt so loved. Meeting him was the best thing that has ever happened to you. He had seen your eyes and gave you a warm embrace. “Itll be okay. Ill take care of you.” he said, his voice breaking also. You really didnt give two fucks if people saw you too. They didn't matter. He supported you at your worst, and at your best. “Cmon.. come here.. You can come to my place for the night if you desire.” he smiles. He made you so happy. A day away from the asshole at your apartment made you so happy. Finally. When your shift at the lab ended you met up with peter. “C'mon..my house is just down the street.” You gave him a smile and nodded. Youve never actually been to his house in the years that you had known him. When you got to his house he mentioned that this is not his house it is his parents that had ‘died in a car crash’ You believed and stepped in. The house smelled of cinnamon. “Its beautiful peter” you say and he leads you to the kitchen and he makes you some dinner. He had made some steak. “Mmf peter.. This is delicious!” you say with your mouth full of the delicacy. “Thank you.. Moms recipe.” he exclaims. When your done he leads you to his room. His room was kind of messy, dusty also. It had looked like no one had been in here for years. Strange isnt it? You shrug it off and continue with him showing you the bed. “Ill sleep on the floor. You can have the bet hun.” he says softly. “no no i dont want you sleeping on the floor! We can share a bed.” you exclaim. He shrugs and says “alright sweetie, but only if you're comfortable with that. Okay?” You nodded. “I think I have some antibiotics and bandages in my bathroom. I'll be back.” he chuckled. In the meantime, you looked around his room. Nothing too interesting except this tool box under his bed. You were going to look in it but it requires a key. Damn. I guess everyone needs some privacy. Peter walks in and sets his box of bandages and antibiotics. “Okay i need you to answer honestly. Where does it hurt?” peter aked. “Uhm everywhere honestly.. But mostly on my chest.” you declared. He nodded in confirmation, “okay, i'm going to need you to lift your shirt up. Okay?” You nod and slowly lift your shirt up. You'd be lying if you said this didn't turn you on. Peter treating your wounds. He gazes up at you and mumbles, “how did this happen..” You try to look away from him, but you feel a sting on your chest. “Fuck- what are you doing ! “ You scream, but you look down at him and see he is trying his best not to make it be painful. “..oh i'm sorry baby did that hurt?” he questioned. I mean, of course it hurt!

You nod and he utters, “i'm so sorry darlin. Please let me know if this hurts.” You manage to let out a “mhm..” and he continues. It did sting and burn when he was treating your wounds, but he insisted that he take care of you. The wounds were very serious. When you took a shower yesterday, you tried to take the shards of glass from the beer bottle out of your skin. You had gotten most out but, there were still a few small tiny pieces in your skin. You winced at him taking the shards out. Sure hurt like hell. When he finished getting the chips of glass out of your flesh, you let out a relieved sigh. But he was not done yet. He still had to treat the rest of your wounds. When he finished with that, he grinned and said, “There, i'm very sorry if that hurt my love” he then gives you a kiss on the cheek.

He starts to apply the bandages to the areas where the cuts were. “Now.. please tell me who did this sweetheart..” You gulp. You were so scared to tell 001. He was just a co-worker… right? What if he makes a new rumor that the lab whore gets assaulted by her boyfriend everyday after work.. No, he would never. Peter isn't that type of guy..right? Fuck it, you wanna see that asshole burn in hell after the shit he does to you daily. “It's.. m-my boyfriend..” his eyes widened. He did not expect that to exit your lips. Your boyfriend out of all people. He just thought it was one of the slutty whores at the lab. “Oh my love.. I'm so sorry this is happening.. You shouldnt be mistreated like this. Have you tried calling the police?” he says like he, himself, is about to start crying. “Yes.. I've tried everything. He just ends up assaulting me.” his eyes start to form tears. He gives you one of the best hugs ever. You both start sobbing. “Come on, let's get to sleep.” he whimpered.

When you wake up, you look over and Peter is still asleep. Today is your day off. You look up at the clock at his bedside, it is four in the morning. You yawn, your eyes blurry. You massage your eyes in distress. The pain has gotten better. You get up to go wash your face in the bathroom. You splash some water on your face and hear an ominous creeeeaak. The door opens slowly and reveals peter.

He groans and questions, “mmf..y/n.. What are you doing awake?” You had wondered the same thing about him. He usually arrives late at work a few hours late. Huh. “Sorry, did I wake you? My apologies peter. I was just waking myself up.” you chuckled. He has a BAD bed head. Like hair covering his eyes and stuck to his face bedhead. He grinned and mumbled, “yeah.. Haha..” You didnt realize at the time but his morning voice was so attractive to you. It was like heaven. Anyways, you both had a moment of awkwardness and sexual tension. You slept in a white tank top. Since that was the only thing you had under your lab uniform. He slept in white shorts and a black shirt. His house was very chiilly. You broke the silence with him him clearing his throat. “Do you want some breakfast?” he asked softly. Your stomach was practically roaring. “Pplease?” you giggle. He leads you to his kitchen. Which looked like it hadnt been dusted in CENTURIES. You are beginning to get more and more suspicious of him.. But you just shrug it off. “So, what would you like for breakfast? Toast? Bacon? Or eggs?” you think to yourself for a moment and declare, “eggs and bacon please” Yesterday was actually one of the best days of your life. A day without him. It was so peaceful. But you are terrified to see his reaction to you being gone for days. You wish you never had to leave. You loved being around peter. You felt so safe with him. “Your breakfast is almost done my love..” He kindly said. A few seconds later the door bell rang. “Do you want me to get the door while you finish up?” you yell over the loud noise of the skillet. It smelt heavenly. “YES” he shrieks, the grease popping on him. You laugh, “ITS NOT FUNNY!” he yells.

You walk to the door and say, “it is.”You open the door and see what looks like your boyfriend. “Mark! What the h-” you get cut off with a smack in the face. “I should be asking you THIS whore. Who else are you with? Selling your body again, FUCKING SLUT. God damn it.” Peter turns around and glimpses a man in the doorway. They make eye contact. “How the fuck did you know i was here.???” your voice is shaking. You are terrified. “Dont you remember ? Oh wait.. You were knocked out. I put a tracker in your bag.” he says, emotionless. Your heart is beating so fast you think it will beat out of your chest. You rush to the nearest bathroom. “Where the fuck are yo-” he gets cut off with a punch the face. Peter wasnt scared. He wasnt scared of your abuser. He hated him. Meaanwhile, you were in the bathroom literally puking your guts out. Having a panic attack. You didnt think he could find you. How the hell diddnt you notice. This was all your fault you thought. Tears streaming down your face like a waterfall. Coughing. You hear a knock on the bathroom door. “Darling, are you okay? I took care of.. Him” You try to reach up to the door but one of your wounds had opened. You groan. “imfineimfine.. One- one of my wounds had opened.” you whimper. You dont know how but, the door unlocks. He opens the door and picks you up carefully. “Oh my goodness!! Sweetheart.. Are you okay?” he questions. You look up and ask, “i think so.. So did you actually- did you do something about him?” He looks down and says, “mhm” he then gives you a kiss, “now then, let's get you back in bed, i'm sure you are in a lot of pain my love.” You nodd and he takes you back to the bed you woke upu in. While you lay in bed, waiting for him to get some bandages, you still wonder how he managed to get the door open with no key. Weird, huh? You decide to ignore it. Maybe he actually had a key to the bathroom. “Im baaaack!!” he says in a cheery tone. He must be in a good mood today, you think. He plops on the bed and sighs, “okay.. Where is the wound that had opened my love?” You point to your side and whisper, “here.” He nods and fixes and cleans your wound. “there , all better.” he smiles. “Right?” You nod. He gets up and goes over and turns on some music. You chuckle. “Want me to tell you what happened to your .. ex boyfriend?” You shake your head up and down, signaling yes. “Okay let me paint the picture for you. When you had went to the bathroom, me and him got into a fight, then i basically called the cops, he is in jail now. No need to worry about him. When i had told them what he had done… they said they want your words of all he had done to you. Im so sorry darling if you didnt want me to tell them.” he kisses you on the forehead. You smile and whisper, “no baby, I needed you to tell them. You did the right thing.” He smirks and whispers in your ear, “i love you so much babydoll.” he begins to give you sloppy kisses on the neck. “Thats it, thats it…mm” you moan. He looks up at you, “ohoho, so you like this my love…?” he asks. You gulp. I mean of fucking course you do, the man that you have had sexual tension for days finally decides to make a move?? You nod. “Words baby. Words..” you groan..

“Yes.. i love this actually” you giggle. He smiles and continues giving you sloppy kisses and hickies. His knee in between your legs. You are sure he could feel your wetness. He moves down to your lower area. “I dont want to hurt you.. Tell me if it hurts sweetheart..” He pulls down your shorts to reveal your drenched panties. “Oh my, oh my. Look how wet my baby is..” He looks up at you for permission to continue and you nod. You were fine with him eating you out. You just weren't ready for penetration with your wounds. “I know how youve been looking at me.. I bet you have been dreaming of this.. Baby” he states. He then gently tugs at your panties. A single “mm” comes out of his lips. He then puts his tongue on your clit. IT felt like heaven. You had been imagining this exact situation while touching yourself in the bathroom stalls in the lab. “Mm peter” you moan. “Fuck yeah baby.. I love it when you moan my name. Its so hot” he whispers. His warm breath on your cunt send sends shivers up your spine. You moan as he flicks his tongue on your folds. You grab is beautiful long hair. He can tell youre close so he goes faster. “Oh baby… fuck im gonna cum.” you gasp. He looks in your eyes while he is eating you out. “Come on sweetheart- come on, cum in my mouth. I want to taste you.” With him saying that, it made you cum the hardest you ever had. “Mm that was so hot..good job..” he then gives you a kiss. Your breathing eases. “Calm down baby.. I got you, i got you.” he gives you another kiss. “Let me wash you off. I love you so, so, so much.”

AUTHORS NOTE

i loveeed writing this chapter omg!!! The smut felt too early?? But he only ate her out it wasnt like actual p in v shit. DID YALL LIKE IT? ***DID N O T PROOF READ *******

#001 fluff #stranger things #stranger things s4 #001 smut #eddie my beloved #one stranger things #peter ballard #vecna stranger things #001 x y/n #001 #henry creel #001 stranger things #not proofread

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aprincesslonging4luv · 2 months

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a trauma dump in a way

I guess I can talk about one of my co workers. I dont know if ive talked about this on here, but I was hit by a car two and half years ago. and im still battling the lawsuit, and healing from my injuries. I had a lot a lot a lot of injuries, over 9 injuries. and this co worker, he keeps joking about my accident. and it's like, um, ?????. I mean its different when I make a joke about it, because when I make a joke about it I decide its okay and im actively thinking about it, but when someone else makes a jokes about it it catches me off guard, it triggers me. because I wasn't expecting it. and I dont appreciate it.

like, its not like he has to constantly ask people what they said or can't hear ur best friends talk to you half the time. its not like he can't eat and watch a movie at the same time. its not like he needs a hearing aid at 17, 18, 19, 20 years old. its not like he get triggered when someone gets hit by a car or a bus or anything when watching movies and tv shows. its not like he has major back pains as a result of a fractured pelvis from the accident. doesn't have brain damage, can't focus or remember or understand things as well as he should be. so incredibly angry at the world for what happened. treating strangers horribly, just because of the anger you have for what happened what to you. that theyre living their happy go merry life, and here you are traumatized. hurt. and you can't even control it. you dont want to be mean, but it just happens. its deep inside of you. the accident made you a hateful person. not like he has to deal with that.

dealing with the repercussions of not brushing ur teeth for a year after ur accident because you were so tramitauzed and depressed. didn't have to go through inpatient and out patient rehab. didnt have to beg your parents to please take you out of inpatient rehab, begging and crying to please take you home. didnt have to spend 3 weeks in the hostpital, spend thanksgiving in the hospital. doesn't have to deal with lawyers telling you your case is impossible to win, that it was your fault. doesn't have to go to therapy for their severe PTSD. not like he'll ever see Christmas different. or thanksgiving different. not like he has to deal with the flashbacks constantly, everyday. not like he has to look at the pictures from the scene, the police report, the 911 calls, the witness statements. its not like he can't drive at 19 because he's so incredibly scared of being on the road, in control of a car, and can't focus on two things at time. not like he has to a ride a bike to a from work everyday because he can't drive at 19. not like he sees the 18th of every month differently, especially the 18th of November. not like he spent 8 months with half of his paralyzed. not like the facial nerves in his face are still different to this day. not like he can't go to doctor appointments anymore because he has to relive the accident all over again, every time. its not like he mourns the person he was before the accident, how my brain used to be normal.

so, after all that, why does he make jokes about it? but then again, its not like ive told him all this. I wish I was strong enough to do that. but in order to get him to understand that he can't make jokes like that, I have to relive it. I have to give the details, explain what im going through and how this is hard. and that takes so much. it's so hard.

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forcingtumbles · 10 months

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I feel like im going insaaannneeeee

my mother had a VERY severe injury at the start of this month which will prevent her from walking independently for another 4 months at best. My brother and I (with lots of support from my husband, too) have been caring for her this entire time because she needs 24/7 assistance. My narcissistic father has taken her to doctors appointments throughout the month/stayed in the hospital during her multiple surgeries, but has otherwise probably contributed less than 24hrs of care to her across the entire month. He'll pick up 10 minutes here, 20 minutes there, and maybe take a 2hr nap in the same room as her every so often which frees my brother and I to leave the room for a few moments. But boy do we have to scrape for that support. He's also thrown two major blow-out tantrums since mom's accident:

#1) he threw things all over the place in front of my mom while screaming at her and inanimate objects right before mom had visitors over. He only partially cleaned it up in time.

#2) he screamed at her for like 5 uninterrupted minutes basically calling her stupid and unhelpful. And this was because she had been expressing concern that he wasn't working efficiently enough to meet a deadline for his home business-- a home business that hes sunk over half a million dollars into (almost every dollar of my parents savings) with no major profits to speak of (i think hes gained back like 100k across 10 years AT BEST).

He is incapable of completing the simplest tasks without asking her or me a dozen questions that we don't know the answers to because he has what is needed to complete the task-- reading instructions for "cooking" a simple breakfast, or reading symbols to determine if a dish is dishwasher safe, for instance. He even gave her a pile of clean clothes to help him fold despite the fact that she has to stay very still or else she worsens the pain of her leg injury.

And he is bitching about every simple menial task that the rest of us do without giving a second thought, like getting groceries.

To top it all off, he (surprise surprise) isn't paying an ounce of attention to my moms condition, physical or emotional. Today, a new development was that she became extraordinarily nauseous. He suggested three different times that she eat something within the span of like 30mins after she said she doesn't even wanna hear mention of food from being so extremely nauseous. That was at breakfast, then he did the exact same thing at dinner when she was even worse than beforewhich made her gag.

I wanna grab him by the shoulders and shake the egocentrism out of him.

Hes always hated me and fawned over my brother (which drives my brother up the wall from too much of his obnoxious attention). Anything i say to him, he spins into "You just dont think i can do anything right, ever!!" My brother is too conflict avoidant to stand up to him when hes making my mother or any of the rest of us miserable (which I can understand, seeing as we had to fend for ourselves emotionally growing up around such an active volcano of unpredictable emotions).

But my mother tolerates aaaallll of this and makes constant excuses. I think she might finally be seeing how little hes willing to do for her despite all that shes sacrificed for him, cuz in the past few years and particularly the past few days, she hasnt been as adamant about searching for excuses for his unforgivable behaviors and selfishness. When I was a religious child, I used to pray that they would divorce. I still dont think they will, but I sure hope that all this bullshit will at least illustrate to her that he has never loved any of us because hes too full of blind love for himself.

My husband has had a huge problem with my father in particular lately because we're supposed to be moving into a new place together. But instead, I'm having to dedicate myself to acting as my mother's spouse, "in sickness and health," because my father wont. Even before now, I've always played my mother's emotional spouse because my father is so emotionally and verbally abusive or neglectful. Im just sooooo sick of this shit. The entire family would have such an easier time taking care of my mom if my dad were just not in the picture at all, I swear.

Rant over sorry to clog any dashes

#Personal #Personal 2023 #Rant #Huge massive angry rant #Maybe some triggers idek anymore

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thebadtimewolf · 1 year

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maturing is realizing that the eighth doctor (900+) was told not to say 'i love you' unless he genuinely meant those words and all of what it entails with whomever he says to by charley pollard (human blonde) before the time war and tenth doctor (900+), knowing what those words would entail especially when its expected of him after genuinely reliving his war trauma while all the humans there (including the human audience) dont pick up on it except davros (down to losing donna similar to how he lost cinder (another redhead that was labeled brash and yet considered a friend) while he stood there unable to do anything) - and the whiplash of his choice of saying 'does it need saying?' at the end meant he may have said them had rose just found him at a better time. but he doesn't say them. he's mourning the fact he moved on.

ten went and experienced physical and psychological trauma. he's what society would call a man. tentoo only experienced the memory of someone else's recountence of trauma. he is genuinely a trust fund nepo baby who got rose by title alone. he may be the self-proclaimed doctor by appearence but, he was never the doctor that matured beyond war. Tentoo never experienced and went through war - he has the memories of it but, having someone else's memories is not the same as having your OWN memories of a war you NEVER fought in.

rose got to choose between the doctor who physically was there - who has the trauma and has grown to make the decisions that would show the experience while keeping the decision away from emotional interest (to not really show his hand, to keep everyone safe) versus the doctor who wasn't physically there- who does not have the trauma and react essentially like a child being enlisted to a war they never truly understood the ramifications that come with it.

tenth doctor never said i love you because he has experinced loss and didn't want to lose rose - tentoo was a boy with puppy love who wanted to impress his crush and almost got them arrested while playing dressup in his rich dad's clothes - they are not the same... other than both being played by david tennant.

its a happy ending for rose but its not happy ending for doctorrose. we collectively need to get out of that mindset. empire of the rose PROVES that this is our og rose's happy ending. she got the guy from the guy she loved - a guy unburdened by his past and a daughter - but with none of the work that came with it. She loved a guy that came with the monsters but she settled for the one that was unburdened by them. Something the Doctor would've wanted. Rose living a good life.

anyway, i cant wait for billie to do a surprise cameo wearing one of those blonde wigs she wore in i hate suzie fr fr.

He saw that tentoo never had the burden of debating whether it was his right as a time traveler to be the one to cause genocide without a care as long as it meant winning - tentoo only had the memories, a story of the doctor, just like everyone else - and that gave rose her happy ending. someone unburdened by the guilt of their choices. someone that wouldn't doubt themselves or rather someone that isn't limited by their own rhetoric 'no second chances' when it comes to expressing and showing their love verbally as well as actively.

god and 14 going through everything that 11 12 13 went through? i mean the only 10th dr mystery 14 got to solve now is... the midnight entity's origins? like fuck. we're genuinely fucked.

#bw: out of ethos #{ignore: its a tentoo v ten brain rot because i thinking how dts thighs got thicker in them clothes as 14}

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australet789 · 2 years

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I have been thinking about how the Omori gang would react after Sunny and Basil confess what really happened to Mari. And while i dont think they would ever blame those two for what they did i do think the reactions would vary:

Towards Sunny:

Hero: unlike whatever anyone would expect, he would be the first to forgive Sunny. He actually feels relieved to finally know the truth and, selfishly, that it wasnt his fault that Mari died. Hero would get that it was an accident and that Sunny would have never wanted to manhandled Mari's body (Sunny tells how he brought her back to her bed). He would be a bit angry at him for not asking for help (the doctor in him would be like "you should have called an ambulance!"), but still understand that that must have been traumatic for Sunny, since he was only a kid. He becomes the unofficially big brother that Sunny needs after he moves out from Faraway.

Kel: he would be still confused and still not get 100% why Sunny would do what he did, but he understands more now. He would protect Sunny instantly, and would only belittle him for not telling the truth earlier or trust in him. He would feel a pang of jealousy, since Kel thought they were close enough. Maybe not to cover up a murder but he would have helped too! He keeps tab everyday on Sunny and helps him to get out of his shell. He ends up becoming Sunny's best friend, replacing what Sunny once had with Basil, but in a healthier way (before you kill me, i will explain later what i think would happen between Sunny and Basil)

Aubrey: she would be angry at first. She would leave the room as soon as Sunny finishes confessing to collect her thoughts. She would later talk privately to Sunny in his hospital room (with Kel being outside the door just in case) and tell him that she actually understands. Like Kel, she would still dont get how Sunny thought making the accident look like suicide was s good idea, but she gets that she also wouldn't have known what to do. Heck, she almost killed Basil by accident just the day before, and all she did was freeze. Aubrey doesnt forgive Sunny inmediately, mostly because of the years of silence and the photos, and tells him he needs to work for it, basically by making him promise to talk to her daily, even if it's just an emoji text, because she doesnt want to lose anyone else anymore and she doesn't want to lose contact again. Aubrey ends up becoming another pilar to Sunny in a similar way to Kel (altho in this case, it also benefits Aubrey to help her with her own problems too).

Towards Basil:

Aubrey: funny enough, she is the first one to forgive Basil. She knows what it feels to be left alone. And with that weight that Basil carried for 4 years all by himself + the bully she did to him, she becomes very protective of Basil, trying to atone for all the damage she did to him. She still is a bit angry to him, for suggesting the whole suicide idea, but she gets he was doing it for Sunny. They become super close and Aubrey's new friends get confused to suddenly see Basil glued at her hip at school (by Aubrey's decision actually, Basil is embarrassed to be nannied around xD). She ends up becoming a regular at his house to check on him, almost living there, which Basil doesnt mind, specially after one day he sees how her living conditions are. They become the siblings they always wanted to have, to the point of Basil saying that Aubrey reminds him of Mari.

Kel: he gets a bit angry at Basil for being the one who suggested the suicide idea, for making things worse not only for Sunny, but for Hero. He remembers the nights he saw his brother almost lost himself in his grieve. He also, unconsciously, feels jealous of how close Sunny and Basil were apart of the rest, because he thought they were all in the same level of trust (have the same happened with Kel and Hero, would Basil have been protective with Kel too?). Still, he gets, like Aubrey, that Basil only wanted to protect Sunny and in no way what they did was with malice. Kel also keeps tabs on Basil at school, sometimes fighting with Aubrey on whom's turn is to be with Basil that day (Aubrey wins almost all the time, there's nothing he can do against that nail bat of hers). The three end up becoming close again, almost back to how things were before the accident.

Hero: oh boy. I dont think Hero would forgive Basil. He would never understand how Basil came up with that idea, how he dared to disrespect Mari's body that way, specially since Hero knew how much Basil loved Mari and viceversa. He gets Basil did it to protect Sunny, he doesnt blame Basil for wanting to protect his friend, but there were other ways. And he just, cant get the picture out of his head of Basil doing what he did to Mari. While they would end in good terms which each other (after a long while), it would never be the same for the two of them. And Basil doesnt blame Hero for that. The first times they are the both in the same room is uncomfortable, but they manage to get through it. But the trust is broken.

Between Sunny and Basil:

I think this one is complicated. They forgive each other, but they wont get to be as close as they were as kids. Basil understands that his dependance towards Sunny and to Sunny's perception of him were unhealthy; and Sunny gets that wanting to silence Basil and the blame he put on him was unfair, so Sunny moving out was good for the both of them. There's still certain special communication between each other (a laugh, a stare, a silence, a memory), but they have new confidents now (Sunny with Kel and Basil with Aubrey), and also they know how to respect their boundaries.

Oof, this was long. But yeah, this is my personal view of how i see them growing and their friendship being restored with time. Again, these are just MY headcanons, i would be glad to read fics with post-true ending content with soft stuff, cause these kids deserve a happy ending, dang it.

#omori #omori spoilers #tw suicide mention #DONT TAG AS SHIP THESE ARE ALL PLATONIC

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zuffer-weird-girl · 3 years

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@glassartpeasants I blame you for this.

Heartless, demon, cruel, cold, murder...

Those were honestly the kindest words you ever heard of him... yet your heart spoke the exact opposite.

The man could even commit arson right on your front and you couldn't just be... mad at him. Your thoughts about Chisaki never changed despite the attrocities he said and did on all those past few months.

Yet something truly did angered you. How he couldn't give a fuck about you.

After the boss entered on a coma for unknown reasons, Chisaki wasn't the same. Heck, now he demanded to be called by the name of his quirk, Overhaul. Is that or being a pool of blood and mutilated limbs on the ground.

Yet... you felt hope. You really felt hope that this man could change. Be the young man that you met and fell for. Just... notice something.

Notice your pain like he used to... or even show a tad bit of... care. That's all you wanted. Kai would always know when you were sad, on his own way try to comfort you. But now? He didn't even cared...

One tear of yours brushed past the cracks of your cheeks as you winced at only touching it... sighing a bit, you grabbed your mask and put it on. Ready to start the day.

Walking past the halls you saw the man himself standing on his foot. Your face brighten up a bit as you walked towards him.

"Ka-" you stopped immediately when he gaved you a harsh glare "Sorry... Overhaul. Good morning Overhaul." You mumbled.

He only scoffed, walking away from you and simply lifting his hand.

"I dont have time for this. Get to your work and don't bother me."

Each sentence like this one was like a stab on your chest... why would he answer a good morning of yours like that?

"A-Actually.." you tried to muster as he stopped with an annoyed sigh "Can we.. please talk?"

He narrowed his golden eyes at you, looking as if he had been staring at something hideous and that just fucking spitted on his face.

"Make it quick." He grunted, one of his hands resting on his hips as the other remained on one of his pockets.

"I-Is kinda silly ..." you poked your fingers together "I-I mean, we've know each other for more than years already and-"

"Spit it out." He hissed and your smiled dropped.

"... is just that... I felt like I needed to say it." You lifted up your head and stared at him without fear "I.. like you.. more than anything."

"... fine." He simply said like he was expecting something else as your body started to tremble.

".. fine? Is that.." you gulped the thick air on your throat "Is that all you have to say at someone who is confessing feelings for you?"

"Tch." He rolled his eyes before giving his back to you, only giving a side glance "That wasn't a surprise for me. You're like one of those loyal dogs. No matter how much they are kicked they come back crawling towards their owners."

You widened your eyes as you felt the crack on your cheek deepen.

"What?" You let out a gasp of disbelief as he blinked.

"For your information." He narrowed his golden orb at you harder "I dont like to repeat myself. You're just a toy and a obedient scum that is meant to follow my orders. Is only a matter of a lackey, in that case you, and the master." He started to walk as you stood dumbfounded.

Your hands formed into fists as your jaw clenched, finally a feeling you never thought you could feel towards this man appeared. Anger.

Without thinking you grabbed a vase and threw hard enough to almost hit his head, missing by a few inches as he widened his eyes at it.

He looked at the broken vase on the floor in shock before looking towards you, breathing in and out as you felt your skin cracking even more.

"If all I am to you is a loyal pet..." you breathed out, taking your mask off and eventually showing the cracks on your skin to him and the curious precepts coming to see the scene. "THEN YOU CAN TAKE THIS!" you threw the mask towards him that kicked on the floor and almost landed on his feet.

"You have some nerve now.." he growled, taking off his glove as a threat.

"DONT COME TO THIS SHIT TOWARDS ME NOW CHISAKI!" you shouted with a finger pointing at him as he felt his shoulders tense.

Never on your life with him you ever called him by his once surname.

"I was really the only one on this fucking house to truly respect you! Not by fear as almost everyone on here, but because I really am so stupid to fall in love with a bastard, selfish and arrogant man like yourself!" You walked towards him to be standing chest to chest with him as finger was aimed at his face.

"Quiet down." He growled before finally noticing the many cracks and pieces of your skin falling on the ground as you shouted "(Y/n) what-"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" You shouted so loudly that even Rappa winced at the anger of your voice... every precept seing the scene as you breathed in and out "If you want to kill me do it now... would be a favor for yourself wouldn't it?" You glared at him as he blinked, still in shock at your actions.

"Not a word?" You commented as you winced at the cracks going to your neck already "For these past few years I wanted to see you happy, succeed... I fucking loved you..." you whispered in pain, dropping your head a bit, taking out a gift Chisaki had given to you a few years ago, a black and white bracelet you never once took off every since now.

".. I was stupid." You lift up your head with a frown and let the bracelet fall into the floor as you gave your back to him and almost ran out of the house.

He was in state of shock before he narrowed his eyes at the subbordinates and commanded them to get back to work... just when all of them left he crouched down to pick both your mask and the bracelet.

"... she will be back. It was just a tantrum." He sighed, taking the two of your once possesions to hsi office "But.. what on hell was that thing on her face?"

Five months... five months flew by since you exited the Shie Hassaikai for good. Going into the doctors to just search for a damn cure... but it was impossible.

"I'm sorry my dear, there is nothing we can do if..." your doctor of years tries to speak through the pain as you stood in the chair, your arms with cracks as part of your cheek was gone.

"I understand." You said, hollow as you always had been after leaving that house. "Thank you for your time... I will see you on the other side then." You managed a smile to the old man as he could only drop his head in shame when you left his office.

People you brushed through the streets looked at you with pity... and you hated.

You evicted the Shie Hassaikai like the plague himself. And one time you could feel Chrono following you.. it was the last straw when he followed you at the appartment you were living on the subborns.

"Go away Kurono." You muttered, feeling him watching you get your keys and open the door, and before you could close the door you groaned at sieng the black boot on the door, preventing you to close it.

"Can we at least talk? I'm not him." He said while taking off his mask, a wince escaping his lips as soon as he saw you on the state you were "What the-"

"Shattered heart disease... dont have a cure." You mumbled, eyes stuck on the floor as a piece of your ear cracked and fell.

"Holy fuck..." the man sighed shakily "Listen, maybe if you come back to the Hassaikai Overhaul can-"

"No." You grabbed the handle and forced the door "It was because of him I am on this state. And I know you came here by his others, and let me say one thing" let me die in peace." You slammed the door shut as Chrono groaned.

"Both of you are just so thick skull it gets on my nerves!" He kicked the door as you rolled your eyes, locking and going to the bed.

The man glared at the door before sighing, looking at his cellphone ringing and leaving the place.

"Forget it man. (Y/n) doesn't wanna see you or the Shie Hassaikai even if we offered her tons of gold."

"... fine. You did what I order so there is nothing that we cant do."

"Be honest Kai.. you do have feelings for her, for a long time." He ignored the disgusted "tch" on the other end of the call "And honestly? If I were on your shoes I would be almost killing myself to fix things." He spoke with a frown.

".. what are you talking about Chrono?"

"Well.." he looked over his shoulder at your apartment door "Ever heard of the Shattered heart disease..?"

"... you're joking with me, right?"

You clenched the side of your waist with a grunt as your other shattered arm support yourself on one of the walls of the apartment.

"No... please..." you whimpered as you gasped at part of your leg shattering as you felt on the ground, more cracks forming in your whole body as you stared in horror at your hand.

"Dammit..." you hissed before hearing a knock on your door.

"Open (Y/n)." You furrowed your eyebrows and gritted your teeth... the guy wouldn't leave you alone even on the freacking hour of your death..?

"Leave..." you sobbed, tears started to shed and unit with the many cracks on the floor where you were standing as you heard Chisaki overhauling the door.

It hurted tu see him... you still had feelings for the man whose caused you this... you didn't know whether or not if you wanted him to see you or not.

"I swear even when-" he stopped midsentence as soon as he saw the scene in front of him.

You could only lift your gaze up with a pained yet broken hollow look as he almost stuttered your name.

"Get out.." your lips cracked, and at this rate you knew you couldn't even move anymore or else it's you meeting death right away.

For the first time on his life his body seemed to move on his own as he kneeled with one knee on the ground beside you as he stared with wide eyes and shaky hands at the pieces of you on the ground.

"For crying out loud.." he muttered in horror as he brushed a hand on his hair before discarding hsi remaining glove in hopes he could put you back.

For the first time he saw you trying to slap his hand away, and your hand broke out of your wrist, shattering in pieces on the ground.

"(Y/n)!" He shouted in a mix of anger and desperation as he saw your face, one that would torment him at nights for the rest of his life surely.

"Don't.. touc..." you breathed out your last word as he widened his amber eyes in horror at seing you cracking even more "me..."

After this last word you saw black and the last thing you heard was Chisaki shouting.

Your body broke. Shattered in pieces right in front of him.

You breathed in harshly. Your lungs burned at the sensation of feeling air again inside them as you coughed...

Blinking, your vision focused a bit to see you were on your bedroom, everything seemed on order and even a tad bit cleaner than it was usually.

Groaning, you standing on your elbows and saw the bandages on your arms as you untangled them to see your skin back to normal... not even a single crack.

"What..?" You breathed out, standing in sitting with a groan as you looked at your surroundings.

You had the strenght again to move your legs and gasped at seing that the leg you saw shattering was still intact, not even a single scar or little crack on it. Standing up you like a newborn, you took a hesitant step only to smile in astonishment that you havent heard the sound of skin or bones cracking.

Walking towards the bathroom, you giggled in surprise and utter relief at sieng your face back to normal before you flinched at hearing something breaking.

"FUCK!" a thundering voice echoed in your apartment that made you flinch. Aa voice you knew it way too well to just forget it. You poked a bit if your head out of the bathroom and tip toes carefully towards the living room to see Chisaki, jacket discarded as well as his mask, back arched on the kitchen counter as he talked with someone on the phone with a gloved hand clenching one side if his head.

"I put all the pieces together already and it has been almost a month." He growled as you stepped inside the living room...

Different from your bedroom, this one was a disaster, papers tossed aside at everywhere, your own phone shattered in pieces near a wall and the couch was with a pillow and a blanket...

Was he..?

"Yes her skin healed but she doesn't appear to be breathing..." you looked at the man, his forearms were filled with hives and you could see by the reflection from the kitchen counter the huge eyebags that were underneath his eyes...

He looked so broken and... terrible.

".. just wait and see huh?" His voice spoke in venom as the hand gripping on his head lunched the counter "WHERE DID YOU ENROLL YOUR PIECE OF GARBAGE ?! NEXT TIME I WILL FUCKING CALL A LAB RAT IF I WANT A DECENT HELP!" and with that he overhauled the cellphone before literally breaking part of your kicthen counter.

"Dammit..." he whispered, a hand on the counter as he fixed back while the other was covering his face...

"Uh..." you mumbled ".. Chisaki?" He flinched at the name and slowly took his hand out of his face.

Ever so slowly his face turned to see you, his eyes tired and red from sleep deprivation but still just as wide as if he had seen a ghost.

".. (Y/n).." he whispered your name before straighting up his back, god, not even his shirt was folded, part of his button up shirt was unbuttoned leaving part of his chest at shown to you.

You could die happily now.

You both stared at each other for a bit, still in shock as you decided to see for real if your arms were still there and without any mark.

"Uh.. can you.. tell me what happened and what are you-" before you could finish you gasped at him suddenly moving to be mere inches away from you.

"Please tell me this is not another fucking hallucination... " he breathed out as you stood there awkwardly.

"Well, I would like to not be.. I literraly died the last time I remember and-" you stopped breathing and talking just when in one blink of an eye Chisaki kneeled on the ground and cradled your hands in his own as he breathed out shakily "C-Chisaki-"

"My god..." he exhaled as he supported his forehead on your two interviewed hands "Thank God... I thought.. I thought I lost you for real..."

You blinked, frowning while looking away from him.

"Wasn't I just a loyal pet as yourself named it?" You mumbled as he let out one of the most painfull chuckles you ever heard of.

"If you were... was I really going to pass each day picking your pieces together... live on this house because I trusted none to take care of you... ever time I woke up and in very five minutes I checked for your breathing and only lord could describe the amount of relief I had when I saw the cracks on your skin dissapearing... I didn't notice earlier how much I needed you in my life... until I fucked up..." he dropped his head again while getting up.

"... so you.. never leaved after that?"

"Didn't take one single step out of this place... I was never one to pray but god..." he brushed his gloved hand on his messy and greasy hair "I lost count on how many times I begged for whoever is up there to bring you back..."

"... why? I thought.."

"The thing is..." he breathed shakily before locking gazes with you "You only give value to the things you loved after you lose them... I learned that from the hard way..."

#overhaul x reader #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #bnha characters #overhaul #bnha fanfiction #bnha fanfics #zuffer writings #bnha villains x reader

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lacheri · 3 years

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As a socially anxious person, I headcannon that Levi would call and schedule all your doctors appointments for you lol. He would definitely try to urge you to do it yourself from time to time, "because how else is this going to get easier if you dont?"

The first couple times he'll sit with you and let you rehearse what you're going to say. when you finally call and the person on the other end picks up, you get so flustered you practically throw the phone at him. He doesn't make a big deal out of it. Just calmly picks it up, "Hello, I'm just calling to schedule an appointment for my wife."

He doesn't judge you or make you feel bad about it. Just insists you keep trying. Until one day, you finally do it. You call, you actually set up the appt yourself. Your hands shake the whole time, but you actually do it!!

Right when you put hang up, his arms are around you, pulling you into his chest and kissing the top of your head. He tells you how proud he is of you, that it may be small progress, but its progress nonetheless.

(he also kinda misses calling for you after a while. he's happy you're getting better, but he likes taking care of you, you know?)

BIG ANXIETY TW, MENTAL HEALTH TALKS <3

(I should also note how important it is to seek professional advice if you are struggling with anxiety. I mention it in my response, but codependency on a partner is not healthy. that being said, a partnership should be all about supporting one another and being there for each other. remember to always treat yourself with kindness, to support yourself and tell yourself how proud YOU are for stepping out of your comfort zone. <3)

you have absolutely no idea how much this hc relates to me PERSONALLY! I get so anxious making phone calls, I have a script I rehearse every single time I make one ESPECIALLY for doctor appointments and serious calls. everything you listed is exactly what happens, I get all shaky and nervous and it’s kind of funny because I’m not a shy person whatsoever. I just HATE phone calls. waiting patiently for the day you can just schedule everything online sigh.

maybe this is a self projection, but I truly believe Levi is one of the most patient, understanding men you could ever romantically connect with. he likes taking care of you, but there’s a fine line he can walk sometimes of taking on healthy habits or leading you to dependency. he’s very aware of that, which is why he really pushes you to do things for yourself. but Levi is an acts of service lover (I hc this at least), he wants to take on chores that are stressful for you. Levi wants to make your life easier, but also wants to go about them in a healthy way.

so, his solution is to sit right next to you and rehearse that script that you would normally recite in your head. encourages you not to revert inside, to not imagine all the ways you’d trip over your speech — they’re not going to find you stupid or air-headed, the people you’re calling get dozens of phone calls a day and they will not dwell on yours. they will take you seriously, you will know all the answers to the questions you asked. you don’t need to be completely prepared for any and all scenarios, it’s simply a phone call. and he will say this all while his hand sits on your bouncing knee, his fingers working circles to distract your racing heart and shaking form.

and he is so fucking proud as he watches you overcome this. verbally praises you — “you did so good, you didn’t even shake once”, “you should be so proud of yourself.”

and yeah :/ he does miss making those calls for you. simply because he misses saying “I’m calling for my wife”

#tw: anxiety #and if nothing else #if you struggle with the same things just imagine Levi telling you how proud he is of you #it may seem ‘silly’ to do but you deserve to be praised for all the hard work you’re putting in to overcome these blocks #I thank you for sending me this nonnie you gave me another tool to use as a form of self care LOK #*lol* I don’t wanna retype that sigh #nonnie 🖤#cherieanswers

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morgynemberisagenderfluiddaddy · 2 years

Text

So I'm having a rough day week month year and I'm just gonna yell into the void for a little bit ✌

So I have fucking flu like symptoms again because my bitch ass doesn't know how to not be stressed? This is the third time I've been sick in 2022 AND ITS FEBRUARY! I've been in bed all day only leaving for brief bathroom breaks and then! As I'm going to bed! My knee does a weird wobble thing AND NOW I FUCKED UP MY KNEE TOO!!!! I've been having the most intense body aches and my knee really said "hahaha you know what'd be funny!!!!" So I hobbled my stupid little ass up the stairs and now I'm lying in bed again trying to feel tired but I'm just NOT. All day I've been exhausted and barely awake and now my brain is just like "hey, hey, hey, you have all kinds of shit you need to write and edit and all you did today was cry" brains are fun. I really do miss my boys though, I've been so sick that I've had to step away for two months and it's been harder than I expected. Writing is how I make things better but I'm just so fucking exhausted. And to make all that so much more fun there's so much drama happening in my extended family (who I haven't talked to in years mind you). Okay here's the tea, some therapist decided on a hunch that my grandfather has dementia. My grandmother, being the naturally conniving person she is decides to make it everybody else's problem instead of getting a serious diagnosis. So what happens? She calls my dad and says "dads doing really bad, he's sick and he's not going to be around much longer" so of course we scramble to try to get them over here. They completely ruin our Christmas and everyone ends up fighting the entire time, they go back home, my dad talks to A REAL NEUROLOGICAL DOCTOR who ran tests on good old granddad and says "yep there's nothing wrong with him, just normal aging" I DONT HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO SAY ABOUT THAT!!!!

You're probably like wow that's really shitty, but wait! It gets worse!! My grandmother decides to call my mom one day out of the blue freaking out about the Russia Ukraine situation and tells my mom that she heard my brother was going to be deployed. MY BROTHER DOESNT EVEN TALK TO THIS WOMAN AND WE TALK TO HIM MULTIPLE TIMES A WEEK so we knew for a fact that was NOT happening but noooo grandma knows everything and anyone who disagrees shall surely be put to death. Oh I left out the best part of their holiday trip, grandma saw my pride flag (in my room she demanded to see after I said no) and refused to talk to me the entire trip, unless it was to say something snide or critical of course. Oh and one more thing, Christmas day happens, my family spends so much time and effort and money to include them for OUR Christmas right? My grandpa gets a call, it's my cousin who sings a Christmas carol to him and hangs up. He then loudly declares to my brother's girlfriend that that was the best Christmas gift he has ever gotten from any of his grandchildren and I'm literally standing right there cleaning up the wrapping paper from all the presents he opened.

Anyway all this shit right? All of it! All of it that they've put me through for fucking DECADES my grandma texts me feb 14 "Happy Valentine's Day! Hope Your Day Is Sweet N Special As You Are! Love You So Much! ❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹"

I'm so fucking done with this shit seriously. I didn't even answer. (Same woman by the way, that when my dog passed away a few months ago texted me "well dogs die, it happens" also they spent their entire trip reminding me that she wasn't around as well.) 🙃🙃🙃🙃

Okay different tea but on my mom's side. My mom is completely estranged from her family because they refuse to accept the fact that they're terrible people. Well come to find out my moms step grandmother died a few days ago and had been in the hospital paralyzed since Christmas. Now I'm not surprised by any of this because like I said they're absolutely horrible people but the only way we found this out is because they sent my dad a link to a gofundme to pay for her funeral. (My mom hasn't talked to these people in at least ten years, and my dad maybe more) but yep. Find out through gofundme. It's not like I really knew this woman or that she was truly family to me in anyway but that's still really fucked up.

Guys I'm fucking tired. Thanks for letting me vent, I don't know if it made me feel better but at least it's out of my system I guess and hopefully it made you realize that you're probably not all that crazy ✌

#izzy speaks but i really shouldnt #vent

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