#i do think as well that some of the interpretations of the kids' childhood dynamics can come from people who don't spend

[pynkhues]

Unpopular opinion anon. I really enjoyed Roman but I think I watched a different character than everyone else lol. The big one that's getting me right now is I don't really get the masochism takes? I didn't really read him as seeking punishment or only understanding love through pain... I don't feel like he was really seeking that out for the majority of the show. Also I think I may be alone in thinking Roman has kind of a normal(ish) relationships with both of his full siblings?? Like I don't get why everyone thinks the golden trio abused each other. Roman is such an asshole younger brother who turns protective the second Kendall is actually down. Like Roman can be terrible to them but also he loves them so much and it's the switch from jerk to "drop me a pin" that's I think is a core aspect of that character.

I just don't think I understand the fandom version of Roman or maybe I made up my own version and that's the one I like? At this point I honestly don't even know haha

I thought it might've been Roman you were thinking of, haha.

Yeah, there's a lot of interesting interpretations of him in fandom, and I think in some ways he's probably one of the more ambiguous characters on the show. I was just reading this little interview snippet actually and thinking how the interviewer's read of Roman as someone who has a lot of crazy adventures is so antithetical to how I see him. I tend to agree with both Kieran's reply and the OP's tags there though that Roman likely has a pretty good ear to the ground socially in order to project a certain image, but doesn't necessarily actually live it.

While it's not my personal read either, I do get where people are seeing it when it comes to the masochism factor. I think there's a valid interpretation of canon there between Roman courting violence with the protestors after Logan's funeral, and the complex scene with his and Kendall's hug in the finale, and I can see why people draw a link between that with things like the dog pound and Roman getting off on Gerri berating him.

There's texture there, y'know? Even if personally I agree with you and don't think they're especially linked. I tend to view Roman's seeking punishment or the murky tie between violence and love in 4.09 and 4.10 as being very explicitly tied to Logan's death and the void he's left, especially because we don't see it at any other point in the series. I also tend to view the dog pound as kids being kids (more on that in a sec), and I also don't know if I think Roman would get off in that particular masochistic way if it wasn't specifically Gerri doing it (I feel like that particular storyline and romance was that perfect storm of the taboo of it all, the hiding in plain sight, his mommy issues, and also just him generally being really into Gerri).

As for their childhood, yeah, I agree with you there too. It's one of the things that I love about the show actually is that the siblings can be mean, can squabble and set each other up to fail, but the love there is real. Like all their feelings for and about each other can be really complicated, but the love they have for each other just isn't. Gosh, Shiv even says it in the finale - she loves Kendall, but she can't stomach him.

That read of the kids abusing each other I do think tends to directly come from the dog pound game, or setting each other up (Kendall and Roman leaving Shiv with the chocolate milk, Kendall and Shiv leaving Roman with the water pistols, etc.) which I really think is pretty normal sibling behaviour. In particular, I've talked about the dog pound game a bit, namely here and here, and about fandom reads of Roman as the most abused here and here if you're interested in reading more!

But yes! I don't think you made him up. I think he's a character where a lot of different readings are possible because he does carry a little more ambiguity / we know less about his past than we do Kendall and Shiv's which invites more speculation and, sometimes, projection too. I think my read of him is pretty close to yours though.

#i do think as well that some of the interpretations of the kids' childhood dynamics can come from people who don't spend #a lot of time around small children #because as someone who was a guardian to her younger brother spends a lot of time now looking after her nephews #and has dayjobbed off and on with kids for the last 15 years #kids are evil lmao #even the sweetest ones you know can be absolutely diabolical to each other #that's literally the point of childhood #kids aren't born with morality they learn it #and very often trial and error it out on their siblings #it's extremely normal #and literally crucial for childhood development #plus studying the brain's development in pd at work at the moment #honestly that shit is WILD #i don't know how any of us make it out of childhood in one piece #but yes anyway haha #i agree with you but i do get where different reads play into roman as well #roman roy #hbo succession #succession meta #welcome to my ama

[yannaryartside]

CARMY NEVER WANTED TO CREATE A MENU WITH SYD.

AND WHY THAT IS THE CORE THEME OF THE SHOW

PART 1: THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIEVES

So, one of the bases of creating an efficient character arc is to give the character something they want, and something they need. In the pursuit of getting what they want, the theme of the show and obstacles will show them what they need. Most of the time, they need healing from an emotional wound that prevents them from growing into the ultimate version of themselves, capable of winning the challenges of the story. I will try to explore Carmy's wound and, more importantly, the lie that created that wound.

In 'The negative trait thesaurus" by Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi, it reads:

"Wounds are often kept secret from others because embedded within them is the lie-an untruth that the character believes about himself."

When I started therapy (disclaimer: this is not professional advice; I am just talking from how I interpreted all of this), I was introduced to the concept of "limiting beliefs:" lies we have told ourselves about our own nature or the nature of the world. The most difficult beliefs to leave behind are those established in our early childhoods, and we told ourselves those lies to make sense of the world, to make peace with realities we were not equipped to comprehend yet. 

Some examples of lies people belive:

"I am too stupid to learn anything; my teacher said so" "It was my fault that I was molested." "I am a bad person for wanting a different life."

When people believe these lies, they will act accordingly, maybe attracting situations that hurt them but keeping the lie active in their lives. They may self-sabotage or create bonds with people who also believe the lie, even if it doesn't seem this way. 

In some cases, people may develop complete personalities or behaviors to prove the lie wrong, but deep down, they still believe in the lie. Carmy falls into this last category. This is where we find the most contradictory parts of his personality, how he can act shy and insecure in some instances and appear confident and even aggressive in others. 

Long post underneath.

THE RESENT OF A MOTHER:

We can only assume here because I think Storer is gonna let us know more about this soon, but I think I got an idea of this wound when I saw the only moment Carmy was alone with Donna on "Fishes."

I have a lot of things to say about Donna herself, but let's begin with the obvious: the conversation in this scene had little to do with the dinner itself. This was a woman stating that she felt alone and not valued, probably due to being abandoned by her husband and having to overwork herself at the beef to support her 3 kids, all while being a single mother. We don't know if this feeling of abandonment is something she has carried since childhood, but in the state of current womanhood, it wouldn't be uncommon. The work of women (especially mothers), particularly the emotional labor, is rather invisible and not valued at all.

But again, this is something she has used as fuel to resent her kids, who, at the end of the day, didn't ask to be here. Her anger has to go somewhere since she cannot direct it toward the people that ctually caused it. To get to the point:

THE BEARZATTO SYBLING DYNAMIC

Carmy said, "You are not alone; I am here with you." (This kind of comes back to telling Syd she was not alone at the end of the season.) This scene is about a kid trying to communicate to his mother that he loves her and trying desperately to connect with her, to get her to express her affection for him as well.

It tells me that growing up, he felt like he had to "earn" her affection. Donna likes to make her kids feel guilty about her unhappiness, so the kids feel that they are constantly walking on shells because they think their mother hates them, or at least that she resents them and that it is their responsibility to fix it.

In the scene, Carmy asked,

"What is so hard, Mom?"

I think what he was actually asking is, "What is so hard about being with us, to love us? What did we do to you that made you resent us this way?" He is asking because he wants to know, to finally understand. Why do you drink, Mom? Why do you yell? Why do you say such hurtful things?

When she answers, "Nobody makes things beautiful for me," you can see in his face the disconnection. He knows he can't do anything about that.

Then, a crucial part in the scene occurs when Donna calls him "Michael, " which indicates that the only one of her children who could make her feel happy was Michael, or at least that is how the other two kids felt. You can see the hurt in Carmy's eyes in the scene because this answer dismisses his effort to connect to his mother in his own right. She asks him to just leave. He offers to wait to connect with her. Then, it comes to the most chilling moment on the scene, the "we have a problem" using his full name, with resentment in every word. She hugs him while crying, kisses him, and then slaps him.

This is rejection. There is a book called "The Five Wounds of the Soul": wich are Rejection, Abandonment, Humiliation, Betrayal, and Injustice. I think Carmy's wound is rejection, for never earning his mother's love, particularly comparing himself to Michael.

Michael took responsibility for the Beef, finally giving their mom a break. It was Michael's job to make sure everyone was having a good time, to compensate for the discomfort that caused being in Donna's presence, to make sure all of them stayed as a family, which was Donna's intention, so Michael thought he had to make that happen for her. Therefore, Michael is the only one of her kids who succeeds and makes her happy. We know Donna rejects Natalie and Carmy. About Natalie, we can write another whole essay.

THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIVES

According to this scene, I think Carmy thinks that her mother didn't love him because he is not Michael; in fact, he is the most "not like Michael" someone could be. He was shy and stuttered and didn't have friends or girlfriends, comparable to Michael's ability to control every room he was in. Carmy was sensible and no macho alfa as Michael presented himself to be. Carmy left home and the family business, and both Michael and Donna expressed that they feel like he thinks he is better than them. Michael admitted later to admiring Carmy's work in Copenhagen, but Donna never did. carmy grew up having to live with the crumbles of Donna's attention that Michael left behind, wondering every day what was so wrong with him that made her reject him, and wondering what he could do to change that.

The lie that Carmy belives, could be sumarize this way:

I need to earn people's love. I need to always go the extra mile, doing the most possible at all times to earn people's love.

This all goes back to his trauma with Michael. It goes back to his career as a chef and how he became the best. He didn't need to succeed on a larger scale in the culinary industry to earn Michael's respect and love; he needed to be the best in the world, so he did that. He judges his own social abilities, comparing them to Miachae's. He left that promising career only because of Michae's death. He got the girlfriend Michael wanted for him (not saying it was the only reason, but it was there).

PART 2: WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS HAD TO DO WITH SYDNEY?

Well, what does a person who feels they always need to do the most? They do the most. I want to bring you back to the moments Carmy had to develop menu ideas with Syd on s1 and s2.

When Syd suggested items for the menu in s1, he gave her an inconclusive, not enthusiastic "maybe."

When she had to actually cook the thing for him to approve, he tried to make her feel small about it. He felt the need to remind her that she was "impatient and green," according to her previous bosses. He commented about her possibly ruining the flow by using time to cook her recipe. Yikes all around, but the core here is that he was treating her like an enemy, like competition, while she was trying to save the restaurant with what they had on hand to use the most efficient solution.

Then, when Carmy tries the dish and feels stunned by it, he has to make an ambiguous excuse on the fly and just finishes every chance of them using the recipe by saying, "is not ready yet"

And what does he do next? He goes to show the crew a recipe that is extremely complicated for the level they are operating at currently—they said so themselves. I think the recipe is a variation of Donna's butter chicken recipe. To put a nail on that coffin of his intentions to earn her love and approval at the end of it all.

But why does he do all this? Because he needs to be the hero, subconsciously, he is still that small kid begging for acceptance and love; he must go the extra mile. He cannot accept Sydney's help and partnership, because that will take away from him earning what he wants on his own merit.

In S2, he seems unenthusiastic about starting the menu in the first place. Then Claire comes along, and he tries to make it work with Syd and the menu, but I think he subconsciously thanks the universe for not having to go to his core wound. That is what self-sabotage is. That is why he bailed on the food tour with Syd, using such a stupid excuse as helping somebody else move out and never mentioning it again. He never asked her what she liked or what ideas she thought of. For most of the creative process, Syd is alone, working on her own creative crisis. The menu ends up being like two recipes they made in collaboration and then all of his family's traditional recipes. It is two of Syd's recipes and the rest of Carmy's. Then, desserts Marcus did on his own. The collaboration was superficial at best.

All of this creates the core theme of the show. The Bear was once a chaotic place (like their childhood home) that needs to evolve into an efficient, peaceful place built on love, support, and mutual collaboration like a functional family should be. Sydney is the member of this found family that forces Carmy to confront his core wound and learn he can actually be good enough while still accepting help. Therapy probably will play an important part in this theme, alongside with Carmy learning there was nothing wrong with him in the first place, that earning your parent's love is not something a kid can do.

Thankyou for reading. Gif and images are not mine.

#sydcarmy #the bear meta #sydney adamu #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #the bear fx #the bear #sydney x carmy #carmy the bear #carmy x sydney #the bear hulu #donna berzatto #michael berzatto #natalie berzatto

[ember-owlet]

Hi hi :]] I practically did a little happy dance seeing blue eye samurai in your fandom list !

It's super easy for me to see Mizu as a regressor due to various reasons, particularly involuntarily! (And they very much deserve to catch up on their childhood)

So I think the formal request would be a headcanon post ! 👀 it doesn't have to be specifically regressor Mizu if you don't see her in that light /gen :]

I'm just happy someone else in this little corner of agere internet shares one of my interests !! ✨️🌿

hello!! aaa i'm ecstatic to know that you also enjoy blue eye samurai with an agere lens! despite the show's brutality, there are some really good nuggets of baby content to be found. i'd be happy to write some regressor! mizu headcanons for you as its about time i wrote something for them. and don't worry, i see her in the same light as well! feel free to send me your own personal thoughts on the characters/show to discuss as i'm thrilled to be in this corner of the agere internet with you friend. enjoy the headcanons! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ disclaimer! i do use primarily feminine terms when referring to mizu (they/she), but i do acknowledge that there are many interpretations of pronouns/gender identities to refer to the character as, and i find them wonderful! /gen

dynamic: regressor! mizu

content warnings: mentions of vent regression due to trauma, physical/mental anguish, light mentions of gender dysphoria ((stay safe little firelights, you can always come back to this when you're ready))

mizu has always been a trauma regressor to me, especially due to their lack of dealing with their feelings head on. their body would have to nearly force them to stop and take a break from their revenge mission and focus on recovering.

the first time she regressed would be terrifying to her, the feeling of being so out of control and helpless would make her hide away to try to push herself out of it as fast as possible.

it would take an incredible amount of time and trust developed before she felt safe around someone to tell, let alone show such a vulnerable state.

the select characters that i could realistically see her regressing around would be sword father or ringo.

if she were to regress voluntarily it would be to have the childhood that she wished she could have, one where she wasn't forced to grow up as a boy and to ease her gender dysphoria with feminine items/clothing.

she would be a very independent kiddo, not wanting to rely on others in fear that she would be an inconvenience or she would be punished for wasting someone's time after being treated as a monster for so long. if she were honest she genuinely wouldn't know how to react to such affection.

that being said, she needs gentle reassurance when in a younger state with a caregiver that helps her along the way. adding fruit/vegetables to her meals to make sure its balanced or mending their clothes would never go unnoticed and greatly appreciated.

she'd be so used to the feeling of being in pain or nauseous that she'd have a hard time differentiating pain that should be attended to or not. therefore her caregiver would need to keep an eye on her and remind her that any and all pain is worth looking at/caring for.

as a sentimental person she'd want to keep things gifted to her and wear or use them as comfort items until they physically can't be repaired anymore.

some of her favorite gifts would include free flowing or baggy clothes that she can keep close to her person for comfort.

her main comfort item is her sword, and would not be able to go anywhere or sleep without it clutched to her side as it reminds her of home and is something that she can rely on to keep her safe.

an actually extremely feral regressor as well if given the chance to be her true self (/lh /pos). i could absolutely see them wanting to play outside and then coming back home caked in mud and bruises while having the time of their life.

let her be a goofy kid!! growing up so fast from situations out of her control that she'd long for days where she'd let herself have fun.

LOVES going to the beach/aquarium. a true ocean lover whose favorite activities involve being around or in large bodies of water.

play fighting is a love language! she would love to wrestle her playmates/caregivers to see who is the strongest. as a physically stronger regressor she'd need to learn the value of her strength and to not be too rough if she were to get too excited.

they can get easily frustrated with creative tasks, and would prefer specific instruction in order to feel useful. it would make them the best helper around.

would love to play a game where they are the hero for once. (being called a monster can wear someone down mentally and it would definitely make her day to be seen as the hero of the story).

she also requires a ton of quiet time to allow her mind and body to rest. would she ever do it herself willingly is another question for another day, but she'd reluctantly do it if asked of her with sufficient gentle praise and coaxing.

as touch starved as they are, i can't see her being the one to initiate contact with someone unless the moment takes over her softer side and she can't help but wrap her arms around them or gently nudge them with her body to tell them that she's there and cares for them.

from her caregiver or those that she considers close she would accept forms of physical affection but wouldn't be too vocal on how much it means to her.

she'd believe that she'd never be able to repay her caregiver for their kindness but will continually try to find little things throughout the day to show them how grateful she is.

oddly enough i could totally see her gifting a sword to her caregiver as it is something that she believes she's good at and would work tirelessly day and night to make sure it's perfect.

despite being in a younger mindset she can and still would mean business to anyone who dares mess with her caregiver. even a baby phoenix still has talons.

#regressor! mizu #blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai agere #mizu blue eye samurai #bes #bes mizu #agere #age regression #fandom agere #agere headcanons #sfw agere #sfw age regression #sfw agere blog #sfw age regression blog #sfw interaction only #embers writings

[twistedtummies2]

Top 15 Portrayals of Peter Pan

A while back, in 2021 - in celebration of the 110th anniversary of “Peter Pan” - I posted a list of my favorite portrayals of the villain of the story, Captain Hook. Earlier this year, I updated that same list. I said then that, even as a kid, I always liked Hook more than his nemesis, the titular Peter. While this is true, I do think it’s important to state that, as much as I may love the dastardly pirate Pan battles constantly…this does not mean Peter is a bad character. I think that Peter Pan gets a bad rap a lot nowadays, mostly because, if you read the original book…Peter is kind of a little psychopath. He’s sort of a little tyrant, threatening to kill or banish anybody who doesn’t do what he wants, and refusing to listen to reason when people try to help him or keep him under control. And that’s the entire point: Barrie’s story originally didn’t HAVE Hook. The original idea behind what would become “Peter and Wendy” was that Pan was a representation of both everything good AND everything bad about childhood: he is not necessarily EVIL, but he is stuck perpetually in a state of infantile, underdeveloped youth. He’s brash, cocky, and has a LOT of power that I don’t think even he is fully aware of. There’s a lot of mystery surrounding Peter, which actually makes him more fascinating to adults than I think many might realize. Peter’s arc in the story is one of coming to grips with emotions he’s never experienced before, and taking up a kind of responsibility he’s always tried to deny in the past. He’s much more dynamic and more interesting than many people give him credit. I’ve been in a Peter Pan mood lately, so I decided…what the heck? I might as well give a bit of a spotlight to some of my favorite portrayals of the Boy Who Never Grows Up that have come around over the years. (On that note, there has long been a tradition, particularly in stage shows, of women playing Peter, so there will be some ladies included here. Don’t you dare whine about it, they’re absolutely awesome.) Some of these versions stick to the ambiguity of Barrie’s original, while others make Pan either more heroic or more villainous depending on interpretation. There’s a lot of ways you can go with the idea of an eternal child, both idealistic and cynical. So, think Happy Thoughts, everyone, and don’t forget the pixie dust! Here are My Top 15 Favorite Portrayals of Peter Pan!

15. Sandy Duncan, from the Styne-Charlap Musical. (The most famous stage musical version of the story; Duncan first played Peter in a 1979 Revival of the show on Broadway.)

14. Greg Tannahill, from Peter Pan Goes Wrong.

13. Petermon, from Digimon: Ghost Game. (Yeah. Peter Pan as a Digimon. That weirdness speaks for itself.)

12. Mia Farrow, from the 1976 TV Musical.

11. The Version from “Peter and the Starcatchers.” (I’m referring specifically to the books; there is a stage version based on the first book, but I haven’t seen it for various reasons. I love the original books, though. This is probably one of the “nicest” versions of Peter on the list, for lack of a better description.)

10. Robin Williams, from Hook. (Come now, you all knew he had to be here somewhere.)

9. The Version from “Alias, Hook.” (Without going into detail, this really shows how scary a Barrie-accurate Peter can be without much real change.)

8. Charlie Rowe, from SyFy’s Neverland.

7. Betty Bronson, from the 1924 Film.

6. Robbie Kay, from Once Upon a Time. (By far the most evil version of Peter Pan ever made, at least that I've discovered.)

5. Mary Martin, from the Styne-Charlap Musical. (She originated the part on Broadway, starting in 1954.)

4. Cathy Rigby, ALSO from the Styne-Charlap Musical. (She’s been playing the role off and on since the 1970s - no joke, look it up - with her most recent stint being in 2015. She was in her sixties then! Talk about Never Growing Up!)

3. Jason Marsden, from Peter Pan and the Pirates.

2. Jeremy Sumpter, from the 2003 Film.

1. The Disney Version. (Originally played by Bobby Driscoll; this one wins out mostly just because this is the first version I think of when I think of Peter as a character, and because I think the various spin-offs and such have really helped to make him a more likable protagonist over time, while still keeping him true to his established persona.)

#list #countdown #best #favorites #top 15 #peter pan #j.m. barrie #actors #acting #portrayals #literature #tv #animation #film #movies #musical theatre #broadway

[itsdeathofabachelor]

I really like the dynamic I’ve created for Jotaro and Kakyoin in a modern day setting.

Like, Jotaro got an after school gig and instead of going to college he’s took a gap year off the funds of said job, which is like some sort of warehouse or labourer thing because he can dead-lift three hundred pounds.

(The fact that he can deadlift three hundred pounds is also why his manager lets him smoke and drink outside on his breaks as long as nobody else sees him and it doesn’t affect his work, which is doesn’t because a can of beer isn’t going to knock him on his ass being 6’5 and like two hundred pounds himself*)

And Kakyoin is in college for some sort of business something because he also doesn’t know what to do but his very traditional Japanese parents overseas refuse to raise a NEET so he picked whatever had the highest graduate rate and games alone in his apartment after classes.

They’re roommates now but had been friends since they were kids and had reconnected literally by chance, as Jotaro had been working at said labourering gig at that time to pay for his Mom’s medical bills.

Side note: in this au Holly’s sick but more chronic illness sick, and after Sadao realized she wasn’t getting better and, in fact, it was a lifelong illness, he told her to leave. As the Japanese High End music industry is extremely judgmental and he was advised by several of his coworkers (and mistresses) that it would ruin his image if he was branded as a nurse and homebody taking care of Holly while Jotaro was at school.

With that in mind, Jotaro and Holly moved to America to live with Holly’s father, Joseph. Who is considerably more racist and far less charming for people to over look said racism. Suzy Q, his late ex wife and Holly’s bio-mom, noticed that after he gained a few pounds and suddenly didn’t have pretty privilege anymore.

She still barges into Joseph’s house to visit Holly and Jotaro, much to Joseph’s dismay. Jotaro likes her but finds her pushy and touchy without asking for permission first.

Jotaro worked at the same job he does now immediately after school to avoid the jokes and pokes at his father and about his race from Joseph, and seeing his mother try to walk again and cry when she can’t— Lining up perfectly one day when Kakyoin was walking (having just recently moved from overseas into the area of Jotaro’s job site) back from a later class.

Looking up from his phone he saw Jotaro, who was looking right at him from across the road, past the wire fencing set up to stop anyone from getting into the site and messing with the machines.

Kakyoin didn’t recognize Jotaro nearly as quickly as Jotaro recognized him. So as Jotaro long-jumped over the fencing and came barrelling into the street to the sidewalk where he stood, there was a split second where he thought he was going to die by the hands of a two hundred and fifty pound silverback gorilla. Like in the bootleg movie he had just watched the night before. And he wondered if this was the digital pirating god finally taking his dues.

Quickly, I should note, I remember seeing a post somewhere about how Jotaro’s love language is soft but he’d never let you get that close to him (the post included a picture of a teddy bear in a steel cage to represent this) and I think that fits very well with my own fanon interpretation of Jotaro’s character.

However, I do also think after so much time spent trying to help his mother, dealing with the weight of having to be the only reliable shoulder for her to cry on (because we all know THIS Joseph doesn’t have a emotionally intelligent bone in his body) and also the crushing feeling of grinding your body into a pulp for both school and some labouring job you hate— after about the year or so he had been there— would have had him clinging to those hinges by his fingernails.

So, bam! The last comfort of his childhood that hadn’t been ripped away, standing awkwardly at the crosswalk because he wasn’t sure if he should jaywalk because there were no cars coming, or if he should wait because the statistics of automobile casualties due to the average pedestrian’s immortality complex when it comes to giant metal machines are flicking behind his eyelids— obviously, Jotaro loses his mind.

Imagine a black bear. Giant. Huge, okay? Got that?

That’s what Kakyoin was suffocating into as Jotaro hugged him so hard his pre-mature stand popped out a little from his back.

This Kakyoin, having no fighting instincts what-so-ever, kind of just goes limp. And Jotaro, so happy he’s really really upset, shakily puts him back down.

And then there’s a moment like, wait wait wait wait. . . I know that mean mug— and then Kakyoin sort of connects the dots because Jotaro had always been a lot taller than him and also he literally was the only person Kakyoin had ever known that had let him blow out his birthday candles at his seventh birthday party when he found out Kakyoin’s parents didn’t ’believe in birthdays’ other than ‘milestone birthdays’.

And Jotaro had also treated him with basic human decency, considering he could have very easily bullied him.

So his face was burned into his memory for years now, whenever he tried to socialize and said the wrong thing, or if he saw a friend group doing friend group activities and suddenly he felt very very lonely. He actually really missed his and Jotaro’s friendship.

So they became best friends again like immediately.

It turns out in their time apart, Kakyoin had gotten an Autism diagnosis, which explained his unusual speech pacing and all the other things leading to ruthless bullying in middle school.

When he told him this on the floor of Kakyoin’s apartment— both of them doing a Pokémon themed puzzle together even though Jotaro had trouble picking the pieces off the floor— Jotaro could not have given less of a shit, but instead asked if that’s why, when the were kids, Kakyoin had always asked him for ‘pressure’ (AKA, Jotaro being taller than Kakyoin made it so he could give him a hug or lay on top of him in order to provide a good sensory feeling, or what Kakyoin had called ‘Pressure’).

And Kakyoin’s like, ‘Yeah.’

And Jotaro’s like, ‘Do you need some now?’ And mutters something about not wanting him to freak because he’s over whelmed or anything but really he wants a hug and doesn’t want to be the one to ask.

And Kakyoin’s like, ‘Sure. That’d be nice because I couldn’t enjoy the other hug properly when thinking you were a stranger trying to kill me’.

And now they’re roommates and Kakyoin streams his gaming seshes after he realized his parent’s monthly payments towards his rent were giving them ammo for guilt-trips and that he could make money off of games.

Weirdly enough, the same speech abnormalities he got bullied for actually helped him get his streaming platform, as it became his ‘brand’ in a way. Same thing with his flat humour and ‘fun facts’. Also, because he talks so much, his streams are very long, and there’s a running joke in his audience to— when he’s saying he’s going to log off for the night— ask him questions and see how long they can keep him on stream.

He doesn’t have a face cam, and plans to remain faceless to his audience, so whenever he really needs to focus and Jotaro comes lumbering in from a hard day at work and kicks his shoes off, Kakyoin—laying on the couch—raises his arms with his controller clicking over his head, not looking away from the screen, and is like ‘Jotaro, pressure. Streaming.’

And Jotaro hears Ode To Joy playing in his head as he tosses his ballcap with the company’s logo somewhere behind the tv and falls facefirst onto Kakyoin, who, after getting the air pressed out of his lungs, wins his match and talks to the chat.

The chat, obviously, asks about Jotaro, and Kakyoin just says, ‘A good friend of mine gifts me plus five stamina.’ Or some nerd shit.

* I headcannon Jotaro as fucking huge btw but that’s because I love very large angry men who, when relaxed, melts into a puddle of goo because their muscles aren’t straining. Jotaro has that kind of physique. Suzie Q (being Italian) loves this as Jotaro burns more calories flexing all day because he’s so stressed and tensed about everything, than a two mile sprint. So he eats. A lot. He’s one of the only people who actually eats enough not to have left overs. It impresses Joseph more than he’d ever admit.

#jojo headcanons #jojo stardust crusaders #jotaro kujo #jjba #jojo #noriaki kakyoin #jjba kakyoin #jjba jotaro #jotakak #noritaro #I love them #I can’t think of anything else sorry #this is a long one #alternate universe

[willowcrowned]

Was reading a fic that touched on Qui-Gon teaching both Anakin and Obi-Wan and was suddenly struck by "Obi-Wan assures Anakin that he'll be fine, because Qui-Gon is better than he used to be, on account of Obi-Wan clicker-training him throughout his padawanship."

IDK what to do with this other than offer it to you because. It doesn't seem like Qui-Gon would be receptive to Pavlovian processes. But also. Obi-Wan is a conniving bastard.

no okay thank you SO much for sending this to me because it plays into my latest favorite interpretation of Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon’s relationship in a really interesting way

Recently I’ve been really enjoying unpacking the potential that Qui-Gon subconsciously parentifies Obi-Wan over the course of his apprenticeship, because I think it applies a really fun extra dimension to the existing dynamic of uptight nerd attempts to control guy whose modus operandi is bulldozing through a situation in the most efficient and least appropriate way possible. Obviously the implication in TPM is that Obi-Wan is Like That because of Qui-Gon—it’s a sort of survival strategy—but making it a direct result of Qui-Gon’s own insecurities just adds that little extra special something that makes the Star Wars Flavor.

The basic idea I’ve been playing with is that Obi-Wan readily encourages Qui-Gon’s parentification of him because to Obi-Wan’s messed up ridiculously insecure and in need of therapy brain, being parentified means he’s needed, he’s useful, he can’t be tossed away. Of course the problem with being fifteen and deciding that you’re now responsible for a man fully in his forties who continuously gets chewed out by his boss is that at a certain point all that internalization of Rules and Proper Behavior you did as a child because you were terrified of being so unworthy you’d stop being loved is going to kick in, and you—subconsciously—are going to start believing that it is your responsibility to train the middle aged man in your care into being an Upright Young Man. Which like, as things go? Is a pretty standard Obi-Wan interpretation.

The FLIP SIDE of that though—the Qui-Gon side, the even weirder and messier side—is that Qui-Gon is parentifying Obi-Wan out of a very real and very deep fear that he cannot and should not act as a responsible guardian as a child (which, well, he’s not wrong. but he’s right for all the wrong reasons). Subconsciously, he’s trying to set them on more equal ground, trying to keep his influence on Obi-Wan to a minimum so he doesn’t have to acknowledge the responsibility of shaping Obi-Wan both through the ways he’s absent and the ways he’s present. And of course it’s not going to work! Of course it’s not! Even when he’s an adult, Obi-Wan will always be too aware of the rules that constrain his actions as a padawan to put himself on the same level as Qui-Gon. As a child, all he’s going to do is feel… abandoned on some level. The parentification might confirm that he’s needed on some level, but it can’t replace what for him is a very keen awareness that, on some level, Qui-Gon doesn’t want to be his master. Kids that get forced to be an adult to early, even the ones who think they like it, are always going to be fundamentally, subconsciously aware that they’ve been denied a childhood that other people weren’t. For Obi-Wan, I think that subconscious awareness manifests as a desire to affirm himself as an adult—to convince himself that he wants the responsibility, that it’s right for him to have the responsibility.

And he does that by clicker training Qui-Gon.

There’s a very fun feature of relationships mired in guilt (especially the ones where the guilt is born from a very deep love and a fear of failing that love) where, over time, certain patterns develop in which each person subconsciously takes advantage of the other’s guilt. When Qui-Gon bulldozes through an interaction, overstepping their jurisdiction by half and disobeying several direct mandates from the council, Obi-Wan finds himself… conveniently left behind for Qui-Gon to find later, when he returns wracked with guilt over having forgotten his apprentice but unable to admit to it because admitting to it would mean admitting to his fears, and admitting to his fears would mean admitting to the truth of his unfitness as a master, and admitting to that would mean he loses one of the very few remaining deep, meaningful relationships he has left. When Obi-Wan follows the letter of the law, refusing to break a single rule—even the ones designed to be broken—Qui-Gon goes ahead on his own, and just so happens to find himself injured and cornered by attackers he could have easily fought off with Obi-Wan’s help, left bleeding and tired for a guilt-wracked Obi-Wan to find, knowing that he never should have abandoned his master, knowing that he’s an awful apprentice, that he’ll never be up to Qui-Gon’s standards, that he’ll never confess that, because confessing it might finally make Qui-Gon realize it, and if that happens then he gets replaced and one of the deepest, most meaningful relationships in his life slips through his fingers.

It’s not healthy for either of them—it’s actually entirely the opposite—but it’s effective. And by the end of Obi-Wan’s apprenticeship, Qui-Gon is at least 30% less likely to go off on his own and start doing things he really shouldn’t, and 40% more likely to never, ever leave his padawan behind.

And then Anakin shows up, and suddenly everything they’d so carefully repressed and talked around and ignored becomes a big glaring issue in the face of Star Wars’ own #1 complicating factor

#tldr; they're SUCH a mess and it's really bad for them but the vast majority of alternatives are ten times worse #qui gon and obi wan #star wars #star wars meta #ish #this is a very.... creative reading #it's just my favorite right now bc. they're little freaks in it and i enjoy that #asks #phoenixyfriend

[gendrie]

They thought they were hunting her, she knew with all the strange sharp certainty of dreams, but they were wrong. She was hunting them. She was no little girl in the dream; she was a wolf, huge and powerful, and when she emerged from beneath the trees in front of them and bared her teeth in a low rumbling growl, she could smell the rank stench of fear from horse and man alike. (Arya, ASOS)

little red riding hood is, of course, the classic fairy tale of a girl traveling through the woods on the way to see her grandmother while pursued by a wolf. the plot is simplistic, but the symbolism is loaded. its deeply concerned with power dynamics; between girls and beasts in particular. the tale has been told countless times and has just as many interpretations: its erotic, its a puberty rite, a cautionary tale on stranger danger or carnal desire and so on. some have chosen to reinterpret the tale through a feminist lens too. 

Many fans might appreciate that Arya was the name chosen for the alpha female. It's no surprise that Martin has been fascinated with wolves since childhood. The Stark's direwolves are central to the plot of both the books and the show.

"Well, they're mythic. I think even as a kid I responded to the werewolf legends and the wolves in the wood and, you know, Little Red Riding Hood and all of that," says Martin, who claims his choice for the Stark's direwolf banner came from a gut feeling rather than an attempt at symbolism. - GRRM [x]

this story originated during the middle ages in france during a period where wolves were viewed with hatred and fear as is fairly typical of an agrarian society. until recently, the wolf has always been the villain. the girl’s role in this tale is where there’s variability. in the traditional oral folklore of little red riding hood the girl outwits the wolf and escapes. this changed later with the two most well known written versions of the tale, by charles perrault and the brothers grimm, where the girl is devoured or saved by a man, respectively. mercy reads a lot like a twist on ‘little red riding hood’ more in line with the original and i think that tale’s themes could continue be applicable to arya’s forthcoming arc.

Another interesting thing he mentioned: he mentioned the coming of age of Arya in Braavos in the context of how a writer had to discipline himself to write only as many chapters as were necessary to serve the story, saying that what Arya was dealing with in Braavos could make a worthy young adult novel in its own right. - GRRM [x]

grrm considers arya’s storyline in braavos to be a coming of age. this is intended to be the part of her arc where arya journey’s from girl to (very) young woman. which, yeah, is ridiculous, as arya is barely 12. he couldn’t get the 5 year gap to work so that’s what we’re left with. personally? ive accepted that. there was already an insane precedent anyway. sansa was a month shy of 13 when married to tyrion. dany was also 13 when she married drogo. both of their stories involve sexual desires - both theirs and those of the men around them. jeyne p. as “arya stark” has been forcibly married as well. that was a major plotline in adwd. i do not see arya becoming a child bride nor having sex so in that regard it will be tamer, but with mercy sexuality has been introduced to arya’s story in earnest.

The smell of blood was heavy in her nostrils… or was that her nightmare, lingering? She had dreamed of wolves again, of running through some dark pine forest with a great pack at her hells, hard on the scent of prey. (Arya, TWOW)

arya’s twow arc opens on a familiar note; her waking from a wolf dream. whether awake or asleep blood, wolves, and the forest are all constant imagery for her. she rarely has a chapter that doesn’t feature all three. these are also significant symbols in little red riding hood. forests are a liminal space in fairy tales, a representation of the subconscious, a place outside the rules of society. this is arya’s realm even while she’s across the narrow sea in a city. every night her mind wanders back to the woods where she is not stuck in the vulnerable body of a little girl but a strong, swift, fierce she-wolf. arya is an interesting character as she is both the girl AND the wolf. the wolf is a standard fairy tale villain - a male figure both ravenous and deceitful: little red riding hood, the three little pigs, the boy who cried wolf. the big bad wolf conjures an image of terror.

"Some will tell you that they are demons. They say the pack is led by a monstrous she-wolf, a stalking shadow grim and grey and huge. They will tell you that she has been known to bring aurochs down all by herself, that no trap nor snare can hold her, that she fears neither steel nor fire, slays any wolf that tries to mount her, and devours no other flesh but man." (Brienne, AFFC)

asoiaf plays with that, historically european, villanization of wolves while also offering another side to this animal. the direwolf is the sigil of house stark and in many ways that family is the heart of the story. several of the viewpoints characters, arya included, share their souls with wolves. they are, in spirit, the feared werewolves of european folklore. within asoiaf the wolf is monstrous, savage, feared and sociable, protective, intelligent. 

The sound of horses turned her head. Men. They were coming from downwind, so she had not smelled them, but now they were almost here. Men on horses, with flapping black and yellow and pink wings and long shiny claws in hand. Some of her younger brothers bared their teeth to defend the food they'd found, but she snapped at them until they scattered. That was the way of the wild. Deer and hares and crows fled before wolves, and wolves fled from men. She abandoned the cold white prize in the mud where she had dragged it, and ran, and felt no shame. (Arya, ASOS) 

nymeria’s (and by extension arya’s) pack is one of the best examples of that dichotomy. by the people of the riverlands they are a greatly feared thing. septon meribald’s words paint a dark picture, but its mostly an exaggeration. we see through arya’s eyes that is it not typical for the wolves to seek out humans. it’s the opposite. they actually flee before them. nymeria leads her pack away from people. unless they are posing a threat to arya or just happen to be caught up among the sheep. they aren’t monster. they’re animals. 

"Meanwhile, this daughter of his has been fetching and pouring, a fat little thing, eighteen or so—" "Thirteen, more like," Raff the Sweetling drawled. (Arya, ACOK)

in little red riding hood the wolf is, generally, interpreted as a sexual predator. it represents a man’s “animalistic instincts” which he tries to conceal with a disguise to get a young girl in bed. raff is definitely a predator. he did not just kill lommy, but participated in the gang rape of a child and many more. as a reminder in mercy, he comments upon how gregor clegane would give his victims to his men to further assault. the mountain and his men consistently commit the worst war crimes of the series. in this text raff isnt a wolf he’s a “rat”. arya has seen his crimes because she was once at the mercy of him and his fellow soldiers. but not anymore. now raff the sweetling will be at her mercy. in a subversion of the tale it is arya, the wolf girl, who goes after the predator. 

Am I too young for him? she wondered. Too plain? Too skinny? She hoped he wasn’t the sort of man who liked big breasts on a girl. Bobono had been right about her chest. It would be best if I could take him back to my place, have him all to myself. But will he come with me?

these are definitely not the sort of innocent internal thoughts we’d typically associate with a young girl. arya has been exposed to a lot. she has spent time in brothels where she sees girls and women entertaining men so she has some knowledge of seduction. she’s also been a witness to a great deal of sexual violence from a very young age. raff is (one of many) responsible for the loss of arya’s innocence. as she prepares to entice him her language takes on a very sexualized tone despite her violent intent.

He’ll want me or he won’t, she thought, so let the play begin.

She could not give it up. She wanted him so bad.

Mercy looked down at her feet, so shy. “Izembaro said to please the lords,” she whispered. “If there is anything you want, anything at all… “ “I’m Lord Rafford, sweetling, and I know just what I want. Hike up those skirts now, and lean back against that wall.”

all these lines use “want” to express desire. in raff’s case for sex and in arya’s for blood. mercy as a chapter is full of sexuality references. to an extent that is still.....somewhat shocking. arya herself makes references to oral sex, erections, and orgasms. rape is also prominent in mercy. arya plays a rape victim in the ‘bloody hand’ and many interpretations of little red riding hood view the wolf’s actions towards the girl as rape. 

“Not here. Someone might see. My room’s not far, but hurry. I have to be back before the second act, or I’ll miss my rape.” [Raff] grinned. “No fear o’ that, girl.”

to a man like raff there is no difference between sex and rape. he is every bit the villain in a fairy tale. 

He grabbed her wrist. "I'll do the teaching. Time for your first lesson." He pulled her hard against him and kissed her on the lips, forcing his tongue into her mouth. It was all wet and slimy, like an eel. Mercy licked it with her own tongue, then broke away from him, breathless.

arya is still innocent in many ways, like little red riding hood, she is a girl who has yet to have her first period let alone feel actual desire or have sexual experiences. raff threatens to “teach” arya before aggressively forcing a kiss on her. nothing in mercy is an expression of arya’s own sexuality. she just uses the idea of it as a lure. to her it’s a “play” where arya is pretending to be an older girl, copying the things she has seen around her. 

“Mummers are the next best thing to whores.” “Might be, but this one is a child.” “I am not,” lied Mercy. “I’m a maiden now.” 

arya can play the shy maiden. she is, however, a very dangerous girl. raff is mistaken in thinking he’s the big bad wolf. in the charles perrault version of little red riding hood the girl removes her cloak and clothes before climbing into bed where the the wolf devours her. unlike the later grimm version there is no man with an axe to save the girl. in similar fashion raff attempts to get arya out of her clothes. 

“You’re not going anywhere.” He pulled her roughly to him. “Get those rags off, and I’ll show you how old I am, girl.” 

the performance comes to an end after she incapacitates and kills raff. he does not get her out of her clothes nor does he eat her all up like in the fairy tale. arya turns the tables on this tale revealing she is the wolf. here a little girl and a fierce wolf exist in a singular character. those archetypes tend to be stuck at polar opposite ends in fiction as they to represent totally different, presumably contradictory, ideals. the wolf is evil and deeply associated with wilderness and the devil. he is hungry, violent, and sexual. in a “civilized” christian society these concepts make people uneasy especially when they’re present in girls. girls are supposed to remain pure and clean. they are not supposed to hunger for food or blood or sex. the wolf is a warning for young girls against those hungers that will corrupt them. the message is clear: be good, be obedient, be chaste. 

The priest lowered his cowl. Beneath he had no face; only a yellowed skull with a few scraps of skin still clinging to the cheeks, and a white worm wriggling from one empty eye socket. "Kiss me, child," he croaked, in a voice as dry and husky as a death rattle. Does he think to scare me? Arya kissed him where his nose should be and plucked the grave worm from his eye to eat it, but it melted like a shadow in her hand. The yellow skull was melting too, and the kindliest old man that she had ever seen was smiling down at her. "No one has ever tried to eat my worm before," he said. "Are you hungry, child?" Yes, she thought, but not for food. (Arya, AFFC)

but girls hungers aren’t truly unnatural they’re just shamed excessively compared to boys. arya is a character who hungers a lot. starvation is a frequent issue in her chapters as she navigates a war-torn countryside. arya has also faced one injustice after another and hungers for justice, revenge - however you want to frame it. 

The biggest toms would seldom win, she noticed; oft as not, the prize went to some smaller, quicker animal, thin and mean and hungry. Like me, she told herself. (Arya, AFFC) 

arya never viewed herself as innocent or good either. that’s the default for young girls, typically, but arya has been made to feel that she is bad. for that she does feel insecure and ashamed and guilty. at the same time arya fully embraces her wolf side where she finds comfort and strength. her skinchanging abilities provide an internal world where animalistic desire is all that matters and there is no fear or shame. the wolf is a source of power for arya. with cats arya finds empowerment too. her deep connection to nature has given her an outlet for all those dark feelings and actions that the fairy tales warn girls to avoid at all costs.

"The girl is as wild as that filthy animal of hers," Cersei Lannister said.

"She has not said a word since they brought you back. She is a fierce little thing, my lord. I have never seen such anger in a girl." (Eddard, AGOT)

arya is often remembered for her messy hair and being covered in dirt. she strays off the path into the woods, gets covered in mud, talks to strangers. her nature is sociable, outspoken, and fierce. her anger, so frowned upon in girls, is noted more than once. this aspect of her character defies the ideals of girlhood purity that are enforced by society and stories like little red riding hood. 

“Or would you sooner be a courtesan, and have songs sung of your beauty? Speak the word, and we will send you to the Black Pearl or the Daughter of the Dusk. You will sleep on rose petals and wear silken skirts that rustle when you walk, and great lords will beggar themselves for your maiden's blood.” (Arya, AFFC)

sexuality is a major theme in little red riding hood and i expect this trend to continue in arya’s arc beyond mercy. it seems likely bellegere otherys, one of braavos’ most famous courtesans, will mentor her at some point. arya has seen a lot of blood, but her own moonblood is another matter entirely. her flowering will likely introduce her own sexuality to some extent. and since arya is less concerned with social convention and its notions of being a “good girl” there is really nothing holding her back. 

#asoiaf nonsense #arya stark #been sitting on this on for awhile #bc its clearly a controversial topic #but idt this is too bad #no worse than the material itself at least

[whamss]

Ok I have to ask because you have such based takes on rose as a character,

1) do you read fan fic/ if you don’t what’s your general take on fics interpretation of Rose and other characters in homestuck

2) if you do, please I am begging for any rose character study / rose&kanaya pieces you like, anything will do I just would adore to hear your thoughts. Ao3 is like a drought of mischaracterization of Rose & Kanaya and it hurts my soul.

Oh man, I don't read nearly as much fic as I wish I did not gonna lie, I'm so lazy! (And I suffer from chronic daydreamer disease, where instead of reading fanfic I walk in circles in my room and put Rose Lalonde in Scenarios). I have a few that I've read over the years that I've liked a lot though, so I can try to compile a general list:

the ennui of too late and too little

Starting with this one because it was just posted (and I just read it) and I think it's fantastic! Kanaya POV but Rose-centric, with a particular focus on Rose reflecting back on her childhood with her mom as Kanaya and Rose wander through the wreckage of her childhood home. There's a lot of sweet Rosemary banter in here, and I think the characterization is fantastic. It's a good one if you're like me and want to see Rose actually go through the motions of understanding her mother, balancing her newfound sympathy with her Mom's situation and the things she actually put her through. Her feelings are complicated! And I think the author captured the nuances of how Rose might deal with that very well

And, trying to unfold for you, was brittle

Following the theme of fics about Rose and her mom is the Vampire Slayer Rose AU. This one has slightly less of a Rosemary focus (although it's still there), but explores Rose and her mom's relationship more directly in a way that I think is fantastically developed. It's a very interesting read, albeit a little hard to describe Why it's good unless you read it (read it! It's good!!!). I know you're not asking for Kanaya-centric stuff, but if you like this fic (and are okay with reading or skimming over a tiny bit of smut) I think that this author writes a lot of very solid Kanaya fic. Particularly recommending We Face Back All The Way, a Fallen London AU where Kanaya tries to save Rose's soul from a contract with Dr Scratch, and Where the River Narrows, a fic where post-game Kanaya deals with the precarious future of her race, and wanders the dreambubbles in hopes of solutions (and deals with Some Bullshit along the way. And yes, there's Rosemary. Who do you think I am!!!). From there I also think this is a pretty good author to scroll through in general, lots of bangers in there

Yarn Interpolation

This is a Rose-centric series of two fics that I think is very good. Doomed No Sburb AU where there's no game but Rose's powers develop enough for her to know what she's missing. I don't quite remember the exact specifics of this, but it's a very good beta kids fic with Rose mourning the wife she never met and platonic JadeRose marriage. It's cute and sweet, and I remember it being a fairly cathartic read

Show the Lights

Grimdark Rose comes of age and deals with some internalized homophobia along the way. Fun stuff! This was one of the first Rosemary fics I ever read so I hold it close to me, but I think it's a pretty good fic where Rose reckons with her feelings for Kanaya against the prospect of procreation and the continued survival of her species (in between the desire to feel useful to her group as her friends embark on an Egbert rescue mission). Some smatterings of a very fun pitch Vrisrose dynamic in here as well, as a bit of a bonus

love left her screaming at the screen

Speaking of Rose dealing with internalized homophobia, if you spend enough time shifting through Rosemary AO3 you've probably already read or at least heard of this one but I still think it's good enough that I should include it. Very reminiscent of what it was like to be a lesbian teenager in the 2000's, Rose deals with these preconceptions at the end of the world, through an unrequited crush on Jade and Slightly More Requited feelings for Kanaya. This fic was good for me specifically as someone who was always urked by the fact that Rose's sexuality is never really discussed in depth in Homestuck proper (compared to characters like Dave, Dirk, and Jake), and beyond that I think it's a very interesting exploration of how the bigotry and politics from Earth might stick with the kids, even when everyone who would judge them is long dead. This is another author who's fics I think are fun to sit through as well, lots of good Rose and Rosemary stuff in here (will give a particular shout out to think about staying alive, a Rose Strider AU, which is great for those of us in the Put Rose In A Situation camp who also love good gen fic with Rose and Dave)

Reviews Of Young Adult Novels, Mainly Those Prominently Featuring Vampires, And Containing At Least One Love Triangle

This one is just plain silly, but it's one of my favorites. Rose is an alcoholic who writes young adult novels, and Kanaya is her greatest online critic. Sort of an Urban Fantasy, more of an alternate No Game timeline, with a lot of canon elements sprinkled in (classpect powers are still a thing, Dave's that played the game timeline jump, things like that). This one has a very fun Rosemary dynamic, and in general I think Rose's characterization in this is wonderful. It's unfinished but I think it stands very solidly as is, so if you're looking for something goofy and fun to read this is a great fic to turn to

Vermeil Tarnishing

A shorter one shot AU where Rose is a Derse priestess captured by Prospit. This is a fun one I think, lots of fun dialogue with little glimpses into fictional politics, which ends with a bit of a bang. Not a massive Rosemary focus, but the bit of them that we do see is very fun!

> Rose: Reorient

What kind of mutual would I be if I didn't recommend @awellreadmannequin 's Rose fic? Post-game Rose, dealing with her addiction and the mounting threat of a relapse, visits Roxy and Calliope. Very good characterization, Rose's thoughts are rambly and meandering and she is very much Going Through It, but things get better, you know? Good Rose angst, great study of her character with little discussions of philosophy sprinkled in. A look at how Rose's more ironic childhood interests might grow into something more genuine, and take her down a more hopeful path, with some very sweet Rosemary moments near the end of the first chapter and little hints of vrisrosemary in thoughts and dialogue (in Rosemary's hearts). It's still a work in progress, but I think that the first chapter alone is a great read with a very hopeful conclusion, and I look forward to seeing how it pans out, and I think that other people should read it!!! (Best read on a computer or horizontally on a tablet)

#ask tag #homestuck #rose lalonde #kanaya maryam #kanaya #fic recs #hopefully theres something in here you find good! #i definitely need to read more fic. maybe /i/ should be asking for rose and kanaya centric fic recs #(this is me asking for rose and/or kanaya centric fic recs. rosemary or otherwise) #also sorry this took a minute i wanted to read afformentioned Newly Posted Fic before i posted this in case it was good #(and it was) #hoping i didnt miss anything. im sure i did lol

[designernishiki]

not sure why i was thinking about this but. here’s a long ass ramble about kazama

it’s interesting how kazama, despite being extremely influential on kiryu’s development and being highly revered or despised by so many characters in-game, has so little screentime that it’s very up to interpretation what he was like in non-crucial situations, what all his motivations and ideals were, how close he really was to kiryu (and nishiki), etc. most of what we have to go off of is hearsay and circumstantial evidence– ie, mostly what people say he was like and stories about/the effects of the things he’s done. he’s incredibly morally grey and though you can definitely pretty securely say something like “well at least he’s not shimano,” it’s hard to say anything more definitive.

yeah, he showed remorse after a number of years in the yakuza and actively tried to save the lives of some of his family’s enemies against direct orders– but the number of people he’s saved is far outweighed by the number of people he’s killed or had some part in killing, which is pretty literally countless given we don’t know how many people he killed during his time as a hitman, or in any other situations once he was dojima’s lieutenant and so on.

hell, the guy killed so many people that a whole orphanage was built specifically to house their children. the concept gets romanticized in game to some degree (understandably, because we’re usually looking at everything through the eyes of kiryu, who vehemently wants to idolize and honor him) but the more you think about it the more morbid it sort of becomes– especially if you consider how he then becomes the father figure to a handful of those children. He didn’t have mercy on all these kids’ parents, then he takes their role and watches the kids grow up the way they never could because of him.

On the other hand you can look at it as him feeling responsible for making sure these kids grow up housed and fed, because he orphaned them in the first place. but if that were the case with no caveats, then none of those children should’ve ever been allowed to drop out of school and join the yakuza, even if they protested and reaaalllly wanted to. they’re kids, they’re naive, it was his responsibility as an adult, as the one with all the power in that situation, and as the man who killed their birth parents and subsequently felt obligated to make sure they grew up alright, to not allow it by any means. moreover, just beating the shit out of them (which is problematic in its own right) and warning them that it’s dangerous isn’t affective at all because it’s impersonal and provides no alternatives to “be a yakuza (cool)” or “be a dead eyed salaryman (not cool)”.

It really makes me think he never took the liberty to ask about/encourage/take pride in their interests and passions growing up, because if he had, I’d imagine they’d have found individual likes and dislikes and aspirations, or at least would be more aware that there are more options, things to try, ways to live, etc, than just the bland view of “civilian” I think they must’ve had as teenagers.

TLDR: kazama is a morally grey person on whatever level but did not have the skills nor position in life to take on a parental role. to me, kiryu proves this later on with the contrast in how he runs his own orphanage; he becomes a civilian first, distances himself as far as possible from yakuza ordeals and doesn’t split his time between them and caregiving unless forced by extreme circumstances, he encourages the kids’ unique interests so they don’t resort to blindly wanting to follow in his footsteps, etc. obviously he’s not perfect either, but considering he had no singular decent models from his own childhood to follow, he did well, and clearly was doing it because he wanted to, not just out of guilt, pity, or obligation.

I could go into the dicey dynamic differences between kazama and kiryu versus kazama and nishiki, or the details of how kazama influenced kiryu’s personality and behavior as an adult, or a lot of other things, but I’ll save all that for another post (or two. or three.)

#shintaro kazama #yakuza #rgg #rambling #kazama #I actually legitimately made my head hurt thinking about all this #it’s just. there’s so much room for speculation it’s tantalizing to someone obsessed with character analysis (me)

[garden-bug]

Ninjago crystallised gets a 4.5/5 for me!

Overall, nice conclusion to the series, it had all the energy and fun and dynamics I adore, and the call backs to previous seasons were pretty great. The story with Sally was sooo fun! I love Zane. His moment with Pixal in ‘Compatible’ made me cry.

More time could have been given to Nya, y’know, coming back to life. I was going to say more time for Lloyd and Garmadon as well but leaving some loose ends felt natural actually. Zane’s emotions being off could have been more of a source of tension I really liked that concept.

My biggest qualm is with the overlord design. He was not scary! Yes S2 overlord was our childhood sleep paralysis demon, but come on! He was so cool. The tension suffered from his lacklustre scariness. I guess they don’t want to traumatise kids like that anymore huh (as my 8yr old sister put it: “yeah I was kind of traumatised by that.”)

Second biggest issue is Harumi. From this season I believe Harumi is irredeemable and that her motivations are a sham. I loved her in S10 and I think she’s a really cool character; this season just didn’t do it for me. Her ‘death’ in season… uhh I’m losing track WHENEVER was perfect symbolically and for her character.

1) She works with Pythor who released the great devourer… did she not know? But then betrays the Overlord because he created the great devourer. I feel like this is a much less direct link…

2) She believes that because she suffered everyone else should suffer too. She’s smart but not smart enough to see that reviving big evil baddies is never going to end well for her. I think she’s probably insane for trying the same thing twice and for not caring how many people suffer or die as a result of her actions in the same way she suffered and her parents died. She needed a very proper redemption arc for me to even consider her as a romantic interest for Lloyd. Oh my god. My sweet Lloyd deserves someone who can give him the whole world. I don’t care how many parallels there are or how they are the opposite. It doesn’t change the fact that as of the end of crystallised, Harumi is still manipulative, evil, selfish and cruel. HARUMI RANT OVER. I am glad that Lloyd never stopped believing in her though… but it’s not as though that’s the reason she changes sides, which would’ve been nice. I can’t help but feel like their relationship would be incredibly toxic and they’d have a lot of issues. (Harumi redemption believers DNI this girl is not redeemed) That being said I’m open to fanfic interpretations of their relationship because we can just head cannon our way outta this one (pls lmk if there are good Harumi redemption fics).

I would say S2 finale was more emotional. Ohh and S3. Nothing will beat Zane’s sacrifice. That scene changed my life.

Vanya… I don’t think Cole needed a romantic interest. That’s another discussion though.

IM SO EXCITED TO START DRAGONS RISING!! My sister was crying that Ninjago ended and I was like DO NOT FEAR CHILD THERE IS HOPE-

#sorry if I get stuff wrong I haven’t watched ninjago in a bit #literally I stopped at S7 then my sister got old enough to watch it and I rewatched from there #ninjago #lloyd ninjago #ninjago harumi #ninjago crystalized #ninjago takes #cole ninjago #ninjago zane #pixal x zane #pixane #jay ninjago #ninjago nya #ninjago kai #ninjago dragons rising

[chucklepea-hotpot]

Okay you asked for asks and i'm desperate for dfk 2023 crumbs so like. Tell me everything. The best part, the worst part, something you really weren't expecting, how the characters changed, some memorable lines or scenes, anything you want to talk about

I need to talk about them so desperately, so thank you for this ask! My answers are hidden unter the cut in case someone wants to avoid spoilers :)

i had a long ass essay prepared but my app broke down so now i'll try to get the most important stuff together, so sorry <3

the best part:

- the music and the sets plus landscapes in general? i loved it, it gave me a warm nostalgic feeling, felt very childhood comforr movie

- the nichtraucher's relationship to the children, we see how the meet him for the first time and how they get closer with each other and how fond he grows of them (aka how he becomes their dad)

- the justraucher relationship. it was gay. very.

- little hints and details that referenced the book, i got very excited about it whenever i spotted some

the worst part:

- making headmisstress kreuzkamm a little bit a comedic relief? i felt like they didn't do hannah herzsprung justice by that, she is actually a very good actress and the re-interpretation of her as professor kreuzkamm could have been better

- some changes to fot the movie's narration better but to me they somehow still felt off, idk how to explain this in better detail

- i think it was sad that they changed the dynamic between justus and the children, at least in the beginning. i kinda missed their trusting bond, think of matz saying that he would literally die for him in the book, he would definitely not say it in this version. but they had the martin and justis scene from the end of the book somehow in there <333

something you really weren't expecting:

- the nichtraucher being so so funny?

- he is the movie's narrator and there's a scene where he says to get his mind free, he likes to smoke, play piano or go for a swim. and then he advices the viewers to do the same, except for the smoking because he also tried quitting several times already. iconic.

- while the kids are fightibg he's randomly walking through the scene because he wants to go for a swim. i love him.

how the characters changed:

- martina: she now has the eldest daughter syndrome and is mainly sad that she doesmt get to spend the summer holidays with her little brother (oskar <333), she and jo don’t go along immediately because martina wants to keep s low profile since she doesnt want to lose her scholarship (scholarship martin truthers unite!!!!). oh, ans she can skate now (very cool!)

- matz: he is called matze and i fucking hate it. but he is very matz, very kindhearted and his main priority is still taking care of uli, so very in character. his main goal however now is not to become a boxer, he just loves training for becoming one and dislikes the fighting part (dunno how to feel about that but well)

- uli: he is basically the same? he bow climbs a wall and falls down because the rope isn't secured well enough and the nichtraucher takes care of him :))

some memorable lines or scenes:

- jo: her forster parents are djs????? that really caught me offguard ngl. she is a troublemaker now and dropped some very cringy anglecisms, which was funny to me at least. martina ans her becole eventually friends, sadly no justraucher paralellism for them :(

- justraucher ofc, but i'm sure i'll talk about that seperately again and again

- "noch 11 tage bis sylt" (only 11 more days until sylt)

- "als ich fünf wad haben meine eltern mich in einer disco ausgesetzt" (when inwas five years old, my parents abandoned me in a disco)

- "wir zwei hatten doch pläne!" (But the two of us had plans!)

- literally everyone who also watched the movie please comment more, there were so many one-liners

anything you want to talk about:

- der schöne theo?? so very book accurate?? he was such a disgusting little boot-licker who looked like he votes for the fdp, he was perfect

- the outfits for the grown-ups were so cool? i loved headmisstress kreuzkamm's whole wardrobe, it was giving art teacher and justus had very very nice plaid pants on that made him look very queer tbf

I hope that answered some of your questions, please always come to talk to me about dfk <3

#dfk #das fliegende klassenzimmer 2023 #das fliegende klassenzimmer #german stuff #ask

[newpathwrites]

Series Masterlist Main Masterlist

Chapter 5

He pulled away then, and her hands fell away from his arms, his body language difficult to interpret. He almost seemed disappointed in a way. At her? At himself? She didn’t know.

He looked down at his feet before telling her of his failure. He hoped she’d forgive him for it.

“They took the kid.”

Summary: Meeting the Nite Owls sparks tension between Din and Rya which only grows stronger after Ahsoka’s words make Rya question the necessity of their mission. Can their bond survive this conflict? And does it even matter once the child is back again in Gideon’s hands?

Notes: Very little plot here. The focus of this chapter is on Din and Rya’s relationship, how they both view its nature, and how recent revelations about the tribe impact it.

Also in this installment- How does Din experience love, and what exactly does he feel for Rya? Was this bond once unrequited after all? And how and why did Din become so severely touch averse in his young adulthood, giving way to the lonely, isolated man we saw at the beginning of the series?

Warnings: Angst, child endangerment, grief, religious crises, shame, and discussion of sex and past sexual harassment/assault.

Word Count: 3k

Read on AO3

————————————————————

Din’s head was spinning.

He wished he could go back in time and simply ‘un’-know what he had learned on Trask… 

That other Mandalorians existed… that they shared their names and faces freely… that they had not turned their backs on Mandalore but were working toward reclaiming the planet under the direction of Bo-Katan Kryze herself… 

That his entire adult life might as well be a lie…

Rya had been unsurprised by this information, bolstered by it in a way, her longtime suspicions of deception among the tribe confirmed.

And for the first time in their decades-long friendship, Din felt truly alienated.

She was considering forsaking the Way.  

He knew her well enough to know this.  And if she did such a thing…

He would lose her… forever…

——————————

Rya felt her chest might explode with frustration.  She couldn’t shake it - the dreadful feeling that recent revelations would forge a divide between herself and her riduur.

Agreeing to disagree wasn’t going to work here.  

And she couldn’t go back to that ignorant state of her youth - one where the tribe’s directives were followed without question, always beholden to ‘The Way’.

She wouldn’t fault Din for his devotion.  It was one of his best qualities, after all.  He was the shining example of a Mandalorian, raised from childhood to fulfill this role.  In his eyes, she was the traitorous one, even if he would never say so out loud.

Try as they both might, things could not be the same.  Their warm, friendly dynamic had become strained and robotic, like two strangers stuck together in a ship too small.

And a larger wedge was yet to come…

——————————

Rya had never seen Din angry like this, voice rising in volume as he reacted to her suggestion that they drop this mission and raise Grogu as their own.  Ahsoka herself had suggested as much.

She had shushed him immediately, noting the droop in Grogu’s ears, frightened to see his trusted guardians behaving with such uncharacteristic anger, and both adults tried hard to keep their voices level and calm as the conversation continued.

“Rya, this is our task.  He belongs with his own people.”

“You heard Ahsoka, Din,” she had pleaded.  “We are his people now.”  Tears filled her eyes behind the visor as she went on.  “And it is our duty to do what’s best for him.  He’s our foundling.”

Din’s voice grew softer, understanding her struggle.  Of course, he didn’t want to give up Grogu, either.  But they could never provide the training a force-sensitive child needed.  

“Only the Jedi can give him what he really needs.  He’ll be sad for a while, but it’s what’s best for him.”  His visor turned to face her pointedly.  “I think we both know that.”

Rya was quiet for some time, trying to compose herself.  Din wasn’t wrong.  But none of this felt right.  She just couldn’t shake that sense of profound wrongness that had been eating her alive since Trask.  She considered with dark amusement if maybe she had a bit of the force in her, too.  

If so, it was definitely trying to tell her something.

She finally spoke, resigned.  “Did you set the course?”  

He nodded, sighing.  Her sadness and anger was palpable, but Din knew they needed to do this…

Right?…

——————————

Everything had gone better than expected once they reached the stone in question on Tython… in the beginning, at least...  

Despite some initial confusion, Grogu eventually managed to commune with the force or a distant Jedi or whatever it was he was doing, a protective shield forming around his small form.

But then it all quickly went to hell.  

Din found himself torn simultaneously between protecting Grogu, handling these unexpected intruders, and worrying for Rya’s safety.  He just couldn’t do it all at once.

Rya had stayed back to protect the ship.  He’d insisted, thinking her presence would make Grogu’s task more difficult.  He was regretting that decision now.

And so it was that much more painful when the Razor Crest suddenly went up in a burst of flames.

Rya… he couldn’t even think it…

It was all his fault.

——————————

The comms were effectively dead due to the electromagnetic interference of the small planet’s atmosphere.  Rya, though, was none the wiser…

“Din, we have visitors.  Head back to the ship now!”  She didn’t bother to wait for a response.  There wasn’t enough time.

She ducked behind the ramp and ran to take cover under some nearby foliage, hoping to get a better look through her scope at who or what was headed their way.  In the distance, she could see Din take off running.  Good, she thought, he must have received the message.

Rya took stock of her weapons, contemplating if it would be wise to call attention to her location at this point.  Maybe best to let these unidentified interlopers think she was still in the ship.  And if she waited for Din, they could take on this intruder together.

“Din?” she spoke quietly into her comm.  “Where are you now?  Are you close?”

If he responded then, she wouldn’t have heard it, muffled by screeching engines suddenly roaring overhead and the sound of gunfire.  What in the kriff was happening?

“Din, do you copy?!”  She was a bit frantic now.  They hadn’t been remotely prepared for an aerial attack.

Her heart lodged in her throat as an explosion rocked the ground on which she was standing, the Razor Crest engulfed in flames.

Oh, no!

Had Din and Grogu made it to the ship?  

Were they…?

——————————

Despite the shock which he’d not yet fully processed, Din knew he had to pull himself together.  Grogu was in immediate danger, and that had to be his priority.

But then he’d failed at that, too.  

He’d never felt so lonely as he did in that moment.

His entire body felt numb, but somehow his legs carried him to the crater that was once his ship.  He was terrified of what he would find there - he wasn’t ready to face the reality of life without Rya, the only family he knew.

As he got closer, he thought he must be hallucinating, an apparition of his beloved riduur materializing on the other side.

No… she was real…

“Rya…” his voice broke as her name passed his lips.

“Din…” she sobbed, willing her body to move toward where he was standing.

She reached out to embrace him and suddenly stopped, frozen, respecting his boundaries even in this utter relief and confusion, hands balling into fists in front of her to stop herself from touching him.

But he had no such qualms right now, swiftly reaching out to hold each side of her helmet and pulling her visor to rest against his own in a kov’nyn, the only one they’d ever shared outside of their marriage vows.

“You’re ok…” he repeated it like a mantra, like he was trying to convince himself that she was real and alive and here.

No longer able to resist the urge to touch him, Rya brought her gloved hands to hold his forearms, enough contact to assure her that he was real and alive, too.

“I was so worried you were…” she couldn’t bring herself to say it.

“I know… I thought…” he responded, equally unable to voice his greatest fear.

But then the words came out of her mouth before she could stop them.

“I love you…”

And he froze.

Kriff… she shouldn’t have said that… no matter how true it was.  

Din didn’t do love.

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have…”

He pulled away then, and her hands fell away from his arms, his body language difficult to interpret.  He almost seemed disappointed in a way.  At her?  At himself?  She didn’t know.

He looked down at his feet before telling her of his failure.  He hoped she’d forgive him for it.

“They took the kid.”

——————————

The next hour was a blur, suddenly taken in and offered assistance in recovering Grogu by Boba Fett and Fennec Shand.

Both Mandalorians were desperate to have a moment out of their helmets to decompress, and that’s how they found themselves finally alone together again in Fennec’s quarters, facing each other cross-legged in her bunk.

But Din had yet to truly meet Rya’s eyes.

“I’m sorry…”  His voice was terribly strained.  He’d failed her just as he’d failed Grogu.

Rya dipped her head to encourage eye contact, responding with some concern, “Din… none of this is your fault…”

He shook his head.  “If I’d just listened to you…”

“Look at me, Din.”  Rya was firm, and he finally lifted his eyes to her face.  “We couldn’t have known, and dwelling on guilt won’t help us get him back.”

She was right.  He knew that.  It didn’t stop the guilt from bubbling over, but it did stabilize his focus on the next steps.  They would get him back - that was most important.

For now, though, until they’d assembled a proper team, he needed to try and relax - reset in order to better serve Grogu when the time came to jump back into action.

“Okay… you’re right…”

They were silent for a few moments after that, a mild awkwardness settling in.  They’d shared an unusual intimacy a few hours ago, after learning that the other was alive and well in the midst of their mourning, and neither knew exactly how to proceed. 

Rya figured it was ultimately her fault, for allowing the forbidden words to cross her lips, so she broke the tension first, praying that they could move past this.

“Din… about what I said earlier…”

To her great surprise, he immediately cut her off, face impassive and tone direct.  “You think I don’t love you.”

Rya was taken aback by the pointed statement, struggling to formulate a response.  He didn’t sound angry exactly.  “Well, you’ve told me before that you don’t… feel that… so I’m sorry if my words made you uncomfortable…”

“Rya…” he sighed, more loudly than usual which was a feat.  “I told you that - what… 20 years ago?  I didn’t mean… I meant romantic love.  Not… this…”  He gestured between the two of them, clearly referring to their relationship.

“I’m sorry, Din.  I never meant to suggest that you don’t have feelings…” she apologized, “just maybe different ones...”

He reached up to run a hand through his hair.  “It’s always been clear to me that I don’t feel emotions the way other people do.  The word ‘love’ feels like… too much?  At least the way my brothers were using it back then to describe the girls they wanted to… you know…”  He shook his head, uncertain.  “But there is a kind of emotion that I know I felt for my parents that I think must be similar to what most people describe as ‘love’... and I feel that same way for you, too.”

Rya couldn’t help a small, fond grin.  These were probably the sweetest words she could hope for coming from him.

“Since we’re sharing… can I make a confession?”

He nodded wordlessly as he often did.

“When we were young, I used to fantasize about bonding…”  Rya gestured subtly in his direction.  “With you…”

Din’s initial reaction to that statement was hard to place - shocked… confused… maybe even a bit distressed…

“Oh, gods,” Rya started again, realizing that he likely misunderstood her meaning.  “I mean I hoped to bond with you so that we could just be best friends forever and forget about all the sex and romance stuff everybody else was going on about.”

The distress on his face melted into one of mild amusement - he even managed a soft chuckle.  “Well, in that case… same...  If I had to bond, then it could only be you.”

“Well, it got forced in a very unexpected way, didn’t it?” Rya huffed.  “And here we are… teenage fantasy fulfilled…”

“Here we are.”

He was quiet for a moment then, thinking.

“You know,” Din started again, clearing his throat.  “I don’t mind being alone - I’m used to it, favor it over company in most cases.  But I didn’t realize just how lonely I was without you all these years.  I hope you know it wasn’t you I was avoiding - it was everybody else.  Still, I should have come to see you more often.  I’m sorry for that.”

“It’s alright, Din,” she responded in that soothing way of hers.  “It’s my honor to be the exception to the rule.  And we’ve made up for it now I think.”  

She smiled brightly, and he returned the gesture.  Rya was never anything but genuine with him - she meant what she said, and he felt the same with all his heart.  It was a privilege to be the one she trusted.

“Can I ask you something personal?”  Her face scrunched up like she knew he wasn’t going to like whatever it was she was about to ask.

Against his better judgment, he gestured for her to go ahead.

Rya winced at her own words as they left her mouth.  “Would you tell me about Xi’an…?”

Maker… Din had always made a concerted effort to never think about that traumatic period of his life… and the reappearance of Xi’an those months ago had brought a lot of it screaming back into his psyche.  

He had never told Rya anything about what happened back then, at the very beginning of his bounty hunting career, but she had always known something had happened.  He had returned to the covert after that stint a different person - one even more withdrawn, unable to tolerate the most innocent touch, and completely repulsed by any and all intimate advances.  He socialized with Rya only and would sequester himself to his quarters at the first hint of flirtation from a female comrade.  A friendly pat on the shoulder would nearly send him into a rage.  It was like all of his ordinarily subtle and manageable tendencies had been magnified a thousand times.

Clearly, something awful had happened to him, but Rya had always been wary of questioning him about it out of fear that he might turn away from her, too.  What possessed her to speak of it now she didn’t know, but it felt like the right time to ask.  Maybe that pesky force energy was working its magic again.

Din now wore a dark expression, one she’d never before witnessed on him.

His hands balled up into fists, a sign of frustration Rya knew well, but he spoke calmly.  “I’ve wanted to tell you… about all of that… but it’s hard…”

“Oh, Din, you don’t have to…” she replied in a sympathetic tone.  “I was only curious.”

He shook his head.  “No… I want to tell you.”  

Din closed his eyes for a moment and exhaled slowly, preparing to face his darkest moments again… only this time with his most trusted confidante.  

“I did things with Ran’s crew that… they were terrible… dishonorable… and I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for it.”

Rya stopped herself from reassuring him.  Din didn’t need her sympathy - he just needed her to listen.

“I was lost… I didn’t know what to do, so I just followed orders…”

Rya interjected then, bringing him back to the original question, not wanting to dip further into his self-hatred right now while the loss of Grogu was so fresh.  “Where did Xi’an come in?”

He took another long breath.  “Xi’an was not shy about her interest in me.  I kept refusing her, but she wore me down.  I was… curious back then… even though I wasn’t really interested… but I figured maybe it was worth a try - low stress, no commitment…

“What a mistake…” he huffed mirthlessly.  “I just… I couldn’t… I backed out at the last moment.  She was livid… like I’d intentionally embarrassed her… 

“She made it her mission from that point on… to get in my pants one way or another… whether it was willingly or not… She would touch me at every opportunity.  I’d wake up with her hands on me - I don’t even know how she got into the bunk.  She and Qin would ridicule my innocence over the comms during missions… and send workers to my quarters on downtime…

“One night I woke up with her over me, my helmet halfway off… And that was the last straw.  I couldn’t stay there anymore.”

Rya hummed in understanding.  “You were different when you came back to us after that.  I understand why.  You must have been terribly traumatized.  I’m so sorry, Din.  I wish I’d known…”

“I was so ashamed,” he responded, shaking his head.  “I’d dishonored our tenets.  I’d nearly had my creed broken.  And I felt so stupid… for being like I am… unable to even think about this thing other adults do every day…”

“Hey,” Rya exclaimed, tapping his foot lightly with her own.  “You have long since righted the ship.  And you are not stupid for that… there’s nothing shameful about not wanting sex.”

“I know that now,” he replied.  “Your attitude about it has actually helped me understand that.”

“My attitude?” Rya questioned.  “How so?”

He looked at the ceiling, pensive, and still a bit uncomfortable discussing this topic.  “You talk about sex like it’s just an activity… like playing sabbac… that some people like and some people don’t… It’s just a neutral thing.  It’s not shameful to enjoy it, and it’s not a personal failing to… not…”  He finally looked at her again.  “It’s a lot easier to think about it that way.”

“Well, I’m glad to have helped, then,” Rya nodded.  “And I want you to know that you can always talk to me about anything.  I know it’s been difficult lately, since meeting the Nite Owls, but… I respect your dedication to the creed.  I have been questioning, but I assure you that I have no intention of turning my back on you… or our tribe.”

Deep down, despite his recent fears, Din knew that.

“You and me against the galaxy.”

Rya chuckled.  That was something they used to say to each other as children.

 “Yeah.” 

She was interrupted then by a rap at the door, followed by Fennec’s warning they were about to make landfall.  

Din took a deep breath and placed his helmet back on his head.  Rya didn’t miss his next choice of words.

“Alright.  Let’s get our kid back.”

——————————

Thank you for reading!

#asexual din djarin #din djarin & original female character #aromantic din djarin #aroace din djarin #din djarin fanfiction #the mandalorian fanfiction #platonic partnership #a unique bond #newpathwrites

[xamaxenta]

I want to write a Marco/Ace/Sabo fic but idk how to write it exactly, do you have some tips for writing this trio? How do they interact or if they're ok with this? I think Marco is pretty chill with everything but Sabo is possessive and simp (this boy is insane) and Ace is ... Or he doesn't get it at first (like why two pretty boys would be in love with me? No way! Stop lying and Marco and Sabo "we love you!" ) but anyway, do you have some tips for writing this trio pls?

I think you should check out the existing MAS tag on AO3 bc theres some insanely good characterisations of these three interacting

I think their dynamic is very fun to play around with

You have two men of the same age, Sabo and Ace, who have that lovely pre-established relationship of being childhood friends, who lost each other due to tragic circumstances and for Ace, never had any real closure really because in his eyes there was no body to bury, thats fucking intense for a kid his age poor thing

And then you have one out of the trio whos double that age, and potentially depending on how you view, interpret or headcanon the Phoenix — Marco could easily be triple his human physical age, or even immortal which is extremely interesting and spicy to play with

I wouldnt say Marco is all chill, i think thats a baseline observation, he cares alot like alot alot, think about his age and the status and the position as Whitebeards right hand, he has to be alot of things a mentor, a caretaker, a doctor and a commander, but hes also a shoulder to lean on and someone with alot of compassion, he approached Ace when Ace was committed to assassinating his father figure — he didn’t have to extend a hand to him, Ace effectively was his enemy at that point in time, its a key interaction between them imo and speaks volumes of Marco’s foresight and wisdom, he knows people like Ace, wayward misguided angry, hes the one that shoves a foot in the door Ace thinks he should be closing, gives him a family, its fucking lovely

Sabos definitely unhinged, his brain flickers between luffy Ace and the revolution he tirelessly fights for, hes righteous, well intentioned, violent with a streak of cruelty that shine theough whenever hes in the midst of battle, he doesnt do anything in halves, he finishes what he starts — referring to his role at the Reverie at Marie Jeoise — referring to his unrelenting confidence in Dressrosa when he fought in the coliseum and obtained the mera mera, Sabo remembers and retains and certainly never forgives, hes borne of vengeance and flames but when he loves he loves with all his fucking heart its really raw and fullbodied, he is loyalty personified tbh all three of them are

And Ace… my beloved id have to keep him for a separate post because the amount of infodumping and analysis i have for him is actually disgusting haha, i think hes afraid to love. His childhood was fucking rough, Ace learnt to love because of Luffy i fucking believe this wholeheartedly

#just a warning do not mistake Chill and Apathy #i see alot of apathetic marco interpretations which are good when written in certain circumstances #but sometimes its edged in the wrong way #if that makes sense #also feel free to add your own two cents to this post these are all my interpretations #im not an expert Oda is haha

[thelustybraavosimaid]

Hi there! I sent the ask you screenshotted about Sansa and Arya. Your post popped up in my recommended! I wanted to clear things up: I have come up with this kinder interpretation of the underlying source of Sansa’s atrocious treatment of Arya because I love Arya and it makes me sad to think that one of her only living family members really truly hates her. I think the way Sansa treated her is just awful and really inexcusable for a girl her age. I have a little sister and thought I “hated” her for the first few years of her life (when I 3-5) but I didn’t hate her. I was scared because I had separation anxiety my sister took up so much of my parents’ time and energy because she never slept and cried all the time. Of course I didn’t treat her anything like Sansa treated Arya, but I took these feelings I had as a very young child, this misplaced false “hatred” and tried to look for an explanation for Sansa’s behavior that wasn’t just true hatred. Because I’d love for them to reunite and eventually develop a healthy sibling relationship.

It’s not like I think she’s CONSCIOUSLY concerned for Arya. She’s never expressed concern for Arya and her whereabouts and safety in her chapters. But we’re hardwired to care for our family. I think she just struggles to reconcile her family love and her conformist nature because she’s a kid who doesn’t have the emotional maturity or self awareness to resolve these feelings. It’s like how Arya has occasionally expressed frustration with her struggles to perform in “ladylike” activities. Arya doesn’t truly wish she was more ladylike. What she really wants is to be accepted, loved, and praised. She sees Sansa being praised for these things and envies this praise. Thankfully, her desire to be herself outweighs her desire for praise, so doesn’t try to force herself to conform. Just another example of how kids sometimes misidentify their feelings.

I never meant to try to excuse Sansa’s behavior. I do not relate to her as a character at all. I relate mostly to Daenerys but also a lot to Arya, especially my childhood self. As we got older, my sister became a strict conformist whereas I’m a non-conformist and for most of our lives she’s been pretty cruel to me for being different. I guess in a way I project Sansa into her, if that makes sense, because that’s how I’ve come to understand my sister’s treatment of me. She does what she thinks she needs to do be treated well, and it stresses her out that I don’t conform. I think people do have a right to hate Sansa and criticize her treatment of Arya. I guess my only point is that I wish people gave her a little more sympathy and tried to see that her actions, though inexcusable, may have some more complications roots than just Sansa hates her sister.

If you’re going to like, accuse me of secretly being a Sansa stan, know that I have a replica of needle displayed on my wall. I truly wholly love Arya almost as much as I love Dany. Hopefully this is coherent!

I'm stopping at the part where you admit that your reasoning is based on a headcanon of yours.

That is quite literally the problem here and what I was addressing—you are minimising what is being said and mentioned in the text. You agree that it is horrendous how much Sansa does not care, nor would I say she actually holds much love in general for her. So what is the purpose of this exchange?

Not everyone in your family is going to like you. That's fine. The approach that Sansa has in regards to anything Arya does or says is not. It's deliberately abnormal on the author's part. That is why Sansa was created in the first place—as a means of discourse amongst the family.

Arya was one of the first characters created. Sansa came about as a total opposite b/c too many of the Stark family members were getting along and familes aren't like that. Thus, Sansa was created; he ended by saying they have deep issues to work out.

[Source]

Trying to excuse any part of their antagonistic dynamic in favour of a headcanon is not what the author intended.

[ohcitron]

future ishimiko au doodles. below the cut are my extensive thoughts about these and context. there should be captions on these images as well

these are transcriptions of my handwritten notes on my ipad from finals season edited for clarity + some additional rambling. these are subject to change and the art is from varying times this past spring + summer. this is mostly my mindless self indulgence and “ishimiko but if i did it” - see an ask i answered for character bingo for my other thoughts on ishimiko but if i did it for their high school dynamic/what i wish their themes were - this is mostly about the future

- they are in their mid to late twenties in this au and did not become romantically involved at all in high school, miko kept her feelings to herself and they eventually faded as they got older, they continue to be on stuco together and go to different universities and graduate on good terms but the friendship fades with time and distance

- miko studied law > became a lawyer > specializes in representing children in court, i think this would be good for her.

- ishigami studied econ & business in university > did not like it but finished his degree > took over his mother’s flower shop and enjoys it immensely, makes small clay/wood carving trinkets to sell as well

- i think they would benefit from becoming good friends at the end of high school and reconnecting later after some time apart. with the distance from high school they will be able to tell each other about their stupid middle school and high school selves with some emotional distance, and be able to completely reveal what they tried to do for each other and be able to laugh about it. i want them to be more mature when they date...

- personality differences!!! miko is better at taking compliments and is generally more pokerfaced and is better at understanding situations with more nuance, she has come to terms with her sexuality and i interpret her as bi ^_^, ishigami has gotten more expressive overtime and as a result is now worse at taking compliments. he has also generally mellowed out more and holds less gamer rage in his heart

- visual differences!!! miko cut her hair short for ease. she has glasses!!!!!!!!! this is a shirogane parallel and also just makes sense i think. ishigami grows out his hair and he already dresses kind of androgynous outside of school i think he would just do that even more so. (spins my wheel of various ishigami gender interpretations and makes my au possible for every variant on the wheel) also i forgot to draw glasses on miko for a lot of these oops

- i think maybe they could be long distance discord friends throughout university as well. but i think it would be interesting to have them separated for a bit and later work in the same area and reconnect by chance

- i understand why a lot of media is like this but i just dont think a friend group from high school can sprout three long term “endgame” relationships  (kaguprez and wishful thinking hayachika) they need some time to be alone and explore who they are without each other around i think.. especially when you are as scrambled as ishimiko and you go to an elite private high school

- i dont think they would have kids really miko would be busy and doesnt want to subject her own childhood to another child and ishigami would likely not feel confident in raising a child. they probably will like be in their 40s playing video games together lol.

- maybe they would have chickens and a garden but this is mostly me being self indulgent. i just like giving my favorite characters chickens

those are most of my thoughts for now ! i came up with a lot of this as a last ditch attempt to keep me sane and tethered to this earth during finals season if that explains anything.

#ange.png #no one gets them like i do. #please tell me what you think . or hit me with a steel bat #kaguya sama #ishimiko future au #<- will be the official tag #ishigami yuu #iino miko #ishimiko

[ink-fireplace-coffee]

Hey

Tell me some stuff about twins. I never do any real person research for my characters but I should really start.

oh wow okay that's a long answer so be mindful of that

also this is all my own experience so if you happen to be part of a pair of twins and wants to chime in, please do so.

Okay first thing first: there are two types of twins. Identical twins and non-identical twins.

I am a non-identical twin. Which means exactly what you can be thinking: my sister and I are nothing like each other physically. She has brown hair and eyes, I have somewhat blondish-brown hair and grey eyes. Our face structure is different, our features are different. Our body is different.

Most of the time people don't even guess we are twins at first! But we are.

Second thing I should probably say: I'm two minutes older than my twin (yes it matters) I'm the older one.

Your set of twins are going to be x minutes apart from the other and that's a number you take to your grave. That's a number you remind them everytime you are in an argument and you want to make a point.

My sister and I grew up in a neighborhood where there weren't any kids out age, so we've spent almost all our childhood together. This translates to use having almost the same exact memories of things, our own language (invented words to refer to something or someone and we talk backwards when we need to say anything with people in front of us), key words that we created when we were little and basically the same childhood!

If you went to my twin and said "the girl and the fence" i know what she's thinking about. And if you told me "Imagine by John Lennon" I can interpret you our own version of the song that we wrote when we were like eight or so.

This means that more often than not we speak at the same time and say the same (I guess you could say it is because we have similar braincell patterns if you want to get scientific, but telekinesis is a much nicer explanation)

Still of course we are not the same person! At all! We both have different hobbies, likes and dislikes and are our own person, even if we still relate to a lot of things. I like to refer to my sister's hobbies as "the same as mine, but in a different direction": we both like reading, but we read different genres; or we both like a sport but for different reasons.

Living with a twin us not living with your best friend. Not always. We fight a lot (as siblings do) over dumb stuff and we are not joined by the hip. Specially not literally since she is in Germany now so...

Maybe this is also just my case, but I've grown so used to people calling me by my sister's name that I answer to it automatically, so maybe that's a twin's thing as well.

In my course, we were four set of twins: two pairs of two boys, us and a pair of a boy and a girl. Of course everyone had different dynamics but I think it's safe to say that almost all of us share that proximity with our sibling the way separate siblings don't do (← can't know for sure cause I don't have a separate sibling just my twin and I)

Somehow, the fact that we shared course, sometimes teachers, a friend group and later on the same class, has made us build our self concept around each other. Being a twin is part of our identity and now that I'm in uni and I'm meeting new people it initially shocks me when they are surprised cause they just found out that I'm not a single kid. Cause I'm clearly half of a set, you know? Still of course I know it's not something visibly clear.

We have a lot (and I mean a lot) of inside jokes, of stories and memories. I think she knows me more than anyone could ever because I've spent all my life with her. There are some childhood grudges as well (like when she ripped the scratch page that smelt like chocolate from my Geronimo Stilton Fantasy Kingdom book)

Aside from that now that we are kilometers away, our day to day conversations usually are either calling the other while we are studying and just talking about whatever or sending us memes and tiktoks saying "that's u" (she just did that as I'm typing this)

If you happen to be part from a set of twins and want to add your own little things or share stories PLEASE feel free to reblog this!!!

Again this is just my humble interpretation of 20 years of being a twin and you might not agree with some stuff which is completely normal!

#twin behaviour #twins #writing about twins #should i stress once more this is my experience? to be safe? maybe #sleepy friend🦉 #if you want to send me like a little piece of sth and see if its (whatever that means) Im all yours