#i didn't know tumblr mobile would let you FOLLOW these blogs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

serialunaliver · 6 months

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how tf do you make a post title on the new tumblr mobile app all I can do is make words bigger

hi hello it's sivi aka tonysopranobignaturals or whatever other cursed urls i've had. check my tiktok (nukehenrykissinger) for proof this is really me. if you don't already know I deleted my account a while ago after being put in a "most annoying tumblr users" poll. however, it's not being called an annoying tumblr user that actually caused me to deactivate, but rather the rumors spread as a result. this poll essentially grouped me with pedophiles and nazis and for people who already hated me it was a good opportunity to send anonymous asks telling people I believe awful things, am friends with awful people, etc., and while SOME people actually went to my blog before making assumptions, others did not. at the time this all happened I had over 80,000 followers. having that much attention online is only really useful on websites where you can monetize it. on tumblr it only gets your posts and your blog in places you wish it didn't.

I hoped being off tumblr would improve my mental health and while it did decrease relationship paranoia on social media, otherwise i've been doing quite horribly and put my family in danger several times. it's so bad that i'm saving up to move out so my family can live a more peaceful and safe life. looking back on my delusions that lead to planning murder-suicide (family annihilation) it's hard for me to comprehend how it was myself who got to that point. this disease turns you into someone else and there's only so much you can do to stop it--a person in a psychotic state is not self aware. my psychosis is trauma induced and I WILL have recurrent episodes that I can't predict or prevent. I have to live life with this knowledge. it's not easy. treatment is also difficult, and now that i've moved to an area with absolutely AWFUL healthcare I can barely even get my meds refilled, let alone find a therapist or psychiatrist who actually wants to work with me after seeing my record of institutionalizations.

now, on a more positive note, some people have asked me about my world on my tiktok. well, it's just as active as it's always been, and catching you up on current events would take forever so i'd rather post naturally as things occur like I did before.

and to conclude all of this...if you do have a problem with me for any reason that's fine; i'm not entitled enough to think I inherently deserve everyone's support, but I DO think you could just like, block me and leave it at that. oh yeah and the post says "return to tumblr *maybe*" because i'm not sure if I can handle the attention long enough for me to not delete again LOL.

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shinelikethunder · 2 years

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seriously though, it's incredible how much of my "maybe titties again?" goodwill tumblr torched in 30 seconds through obnoxious UX alone:

i am browsing around in the android app. i see a post about disabling some new content filter. this is the first I've heard of it, even though my version of the app does turn out to have it - they put it in place before adding any mechanism to let me know it's there. strike one.

i go to settings > dashboard, the place where all the settings about what you do and don't see are supposed to live. no sign of it.

i go back to the settings menu. squint at it. see an unremarkable entry near the bottom called "Content you see" that isn't highlighted or marked as new in any way (even though i can't even visit anyone's blog anymore without having to actively tap past an FYI tooltip that can't be turned off, every single time, shilling weeks-old gift features that I've already used)

...oh, that's where my custom tag and keyword filters went. no prior indication they'd even been moved!

i have a lot of filters set up. like. a LOT. i now have to scroll past every single one of them, tag AND keyword, uncollapsed and unabridged, just to see whether there's another setting hiding underneath. on mobile! even the desktop site is more polite than this, jesus

just to recap so far: the only reason i even know to look is that i saw a random post about new content settings, and i would never have bothered with all that scrolling if i weren't crusty and paranoid about sites that hide vital settings in the depths of Menu Hell. i mean, that'd be crazy, right? surely listing all those filters with no collapse is a signal there's nothing worthwhile underneath them.

oh no wait, there they are!

it's not just one toggle, it's FOUR new settings!

all of them are set to "hide everything and never even let me know it was there"

even though there is a "blur" option that would've let me know that stuff was being hidden from me without actually showing it

even though i have, in the past, gone into every iteration of the adult content settings that tumblr has ever rolled out and affirmatively ordered it to show me the titties

THEY ARE NOT TOGGLES. EACH ONE OPENS A SEPARATE MENU SCREEN. every single one of the FOUR new settings needs like 3+ taps in the android app just to put it back to normal.

does turning on the catchall "mature content" setting cause the three more specific ones to default to "show" and let me pick restrictions as needed like a goddamn adult? NOPE, i have to go into the stupid little menu for every single one

it's almost like you didn't want me to find them and, having found them, wanted to make me pay as high an annoyance tax as possible to opt out of being nannied

the dashboard banner that eventually shows up, btw, says nothing about having been voluntold for additional filtering, and also just dumps you out in the general settings menu and leaves you to fend for yourself, with no indication of where this shit is hidden or what "this shit" even is. and that's downright friendly next to the link in the announcement post that's apparently been kicking people out of the app and onto web.

this is not how you get a rightfully mistrustful userbase to be optimistic about putting scarlet letters on their own posts. this is not how you convince anyone that it's just a courtesy, not a scarlet letter, or that it won't be used to punish and stigmatize you the instant the wind shifts direction.

in the most practical here-and-now terms, this is also not how you get people to USE the new content warnings on their posts! artists, especially, are hardly gonna jump to flag anything as mature if it means every single one of their followers - regardless of age, previous adult content settings, or whether they're in Apple's walled garden or not - has just been silently opted out of ever knowing it was there. (this goes double if it requires more than one sentence to explain how to reverse it. which this new setting seems almost deliberately designed to do.)

look, i want the titties back, okay? i would be delighted if this turned out to be the first step towards bringing them back. i know Tumblr is under duress from Apple that affects how they can do whatever they're doing here. but the way it's being rolled out sucks needless ass, and if they wanted my hope and trust, well, those are easier to muster up when I'm not going in grouchy about the frustrating UX of an app that's just taken hostile action against my prior explicitly-affirmed preferences.

#hellsite (derogatory)

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electrosquash · 1 year

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This may sound stupid but how do I turn off blazeable on my blogs?

And how is this bad? Again, I don't wanna sound stupid or rude. Thank you for the heads up :]

Hi! No worries, you're not the only one with these questions.

On how to turn off the option to get blazed:

On desktop you can turn it off at this link: https://www.tumblr.com/settings/blog/#blaze It looks something like this

On mobile it's in the account settings menu, there's a lof of screenshots in the additions to my other post like here (i haven't updated since i got a funny little bug that lets me add polls in reblogs of other people's posts so i can't screenshot anything).

Alternatively you can also log into Tumblr in your phone's browser and use the link above there. Don't forget to do it on sideblogs that you don't want to get blazed as well! You can also change the settings per-post in the post menu. I've actually enabled it for my complaint post that's circulating because it would be really funny :D

On how it is bad:

With the way it is set up, people can blaze your posts without active consent. This can be used to bully people, by digging out old or not-adapted posts that were not meant for a wider audience and putting them on blast. This can include vent posts, opinions you might have changed since then, selfies, niche things many people might think are cringe (like 2014 self-insert omegaverse fanfics and the likes ... idk if you've seen the drama that resulted from someone blazing their fic, it wasn't pretty), posts that were only meant to circulate in your carefully curated audience, and more.

Since Blaze's are registered in many minds as advertisement many people will react negatively to them so this opens up a way to bully a lot of people. As usual, people of colour, trans people, and other vulnerable groups will get the worst of it, many are already getting deactivated regularly because of coordinated reporting harassment and since people donate hate organizations all the time they will definitely use the option to make the life of a person they're targeting living hell for 10$.

Staff thought of some safeguards but there are several fallacies:

The option to cancel a blaze before it goes live: Not everyone has access to the internet every day, and staff might accept the blaze while you're asleep / at work / on a trip / in the hospital / on hiatus. Then when you're coming back to tumblr your notes will have turned into a nightmare.

The guarantee that staff will check every Blaze manually to prevent harassment: Let's take the case in which someone's old fic get blazed against their will. How can staff know whether it was blazed with friendly intent (to promote a friend's work) or ill intent (to get people to point and laugh)? They can't as long as it's not against the Terms of Service. In general there will be many false positives (Blazes that get rejected by staff despite being innocent) and false negatives (Blazes that get accepted by staff despite being malicious). After all, the people working at tumblr are only human too. But in this case, false negatives will have devastating consequences - and extinguishing a blaze after it's live will be too late.

Many people don't follow @staff, so many people don't know about this change. In fact many people on that other post commented that they didn't know what Blazes are at all! I think i've read that they will add a login banner to tell you and check your settings, but iirc they had banners like that for the original Blaze function announcement so i don't have faith this will prevent anything.

I should clarify that i don't think the feature itself is bad at all, but it should be opt-in so only people who want to participate get blazed (e.g. art blogs). Or add an active mandatory confirmation by OP instead of a veto option, this would prevent the issues above as well, i think that would be the best option - that way people could leave the option on. I know staff are currently getting bombarded with support requests / flames (please be civil to them guys!) (also sorry. but not sorry. i didn't expect my post to blow up but also i think these are legitimately troubling concerns and i won't make the other post unrebloggable). They're aware of these issues so i hope they will change to one of these options - if they add active mandatory confirmation by OP i would enable to option globally as well (Hint hint this means more money for you, @tumblr, because otherwise many people have and will turn this feature off completely) A bit more time between announcement and go-live (4/20 iirc) would have been helpful as well.

Here's the original announcement by the way:

And since i'm gonna pin the post as long as the other post is circulating: Listen to goatbed guys!

#long post #tumblr #ok to rb

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louroth · 11 months

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Well, well, well. Would you look at what the cat dragged in. (it's me, Lou!)

The time is here, and oh man, do I have a lot to say! Ever since this post was posted on my personal tumblr, on the fifth of may, I have been working like a machine on all things OUROBOROS. I had originally planned for this to just be a progress report/ announcement on what I will be working on now that I am free of the shackles of work, but, somehow, I managed to finish all bullet points, and more. So, let's get into it!

First off, the title. Ouroboros becomes all capitalized OUROBOROS. Idk. It's neat. Next!

Art. Whew. I didn't think I could draw like this anymore- drawing has been more of a struggle than writing has been, forever, always- it was something I really strived to become good at, for a time. And I gave up. Only to pick it up again when I started ouro, and ever since I released that pressure, something just clicked and I have been churning out art like never before. I don't know if this is a fluke, a stroke of luck or if all that hard work I once did slaving away with menial art practice… but I'm grateful nonetheless. (A note on official RO art: I lost my ipad pencil somewhere on the lawn, lmao. I haven't been able to get a new one yet, so there is a slight delay here.) I am hoping that I get to make some commissions too, in the near future. Visit the forum to see some works in progress (amongst them, Yor's RO portrait!)

Onto the hellscape that is coding! I have been growing more proficient with CSS and html with the help of the ones that run so that we can walk; I have studied and researched and tested and tinkered until my eyes crossed, finding my way into this medium with the incredible guidance of the giants of whose shoulders I stand on. I will talk about this in detail on a later date. So I think it's finally time to reveal that yes, I am working on a twine version of ouro. I will develop it in tandem with choicescript; the porting over from one to the other isn't the herculean task I thought it would be.

Why am I doing this? Because I need to have a save system. I am continuing to write the whole alpha draft in choicescript in hopes that CoG will announce the ability to have a native save/checkpoint system, but if that doesn’t happen, I can’t publish this story without one. Unfortunately, I am not willing to code in a savesystem in choicescript myself, because this will be a large game, with far too many variables for that to be sustainable. Trust me, no one is more disappointed by that fact than me. If it comes to the point that twine publishing will be what I do, I will set my sights on writing a smaller game for hosted games.

Now the meatier announcements!

New Socials!

Tumblr: You are looking at it! This is the new, exclusively OUROBOROS blog where I will share all announcements and sneak-peeks, and future updates. I worked together with the dev of the theme and made it oh, so pretty and functional. Please check out their portfolio here, if you are ever in the market for sprucing up your (desktop version) of tumblr. They were a pleasure to work with. Amongst other things, it has a gorgeous header (again, only if you visit on web and not mobile) where I am showcasing fanart and official art. Go check it out! This month, I am showcasing a truly breathtaking art from KAIRELART, and you can find the full art here, or follow the links in the “FEATURED ARTIST” tab in the top bar.

I hope you enjoy this new haven for OUROBOROS! I will be answering questions once a week (saturday) and ramping up as I adapt to this new schedule, more on that further below.

My old tumblr, honeypeabrain, will revert back to being my personal blog. Feel free to keep following me there, but know that it will be inundated with shitposts, crass humor and the occasional poetry dump and personal post. You’ve been warned!

Discord!

By the good graces, this was ROUGH to set up. Working with discord bots is akin to wrangling code, and it was well and truly, a war. But with the help of many, it is finally all done and ready for anyone to join and talk to me and others about OUROBOROS and anything else between heaven and earth.

I will also greatly appreciate if any future bugs and feedback are submitted through here, so I can keep easier track of it. Come join us! (18+ ONLY.)

Patreon & Ko-Fi

Yep! Ko-fi is just a place to toss me a coin if you wish to help me towards the goal of new PC parts to make testing easier, or to just show appreciation for those that have it to spare. Patreon however, already has a multitude of posts and will be a hub for exclusive NSFW sidestories that you get to vote on, loredives and extensive sneak peeks, Q&A’s, polls and weekly dev logs.

Right now, there are only two tiers, but I expect it to grow as my story does. I have many plans, but I am going at a steady pace.

Amongst tiered content, there is a (free) NSFW story with female MC and Idren to read there right now, if you want to check it out! I am mgoing to post it on tumblr and the adult thread here over the weekend.

NOTE: I stupidly didn't realize that patreon had a review process after I pressed launch, which I did just a few minutes ago. Sigh. I am going to post the short on tumblr and the adult forum thread as soon as I get to it.

It is not mandatory by any means, so if you do choose to support me, you have my eternal gratitude as these places will be the sole source of income for me.

Onto writing:

The best news out of this whole bunch is that I have worked so hard on editing and writing, that in the past month I have all but finished a two chapter update! I have a chunk of about 5-6 thousand words left to write, and I am going to buckle down over the weekend to see it through. I wanted to have it done so badly for today, but I lost three days of writing time last week due to still being weighed down with work. I hope it isn’t too disappointing to have to wait until monday for the demo update! I am going to post a link to an as-I-write updated demo on Patreon and Discord, if you want to see the ugly face of raw wip drafts. Otherwise I will post the demo update here on Monday with a comprehensive post!

And now! the biggest news is… from now on, I am writing full time!

This is what I have been tossing and turning about every night ever since Easter. It started as a silly idea while talking to some friends and family about how I was looking for a change in career. And then, little by little, that idea whittled down to a plan, carefully carved by my partner and his whispers of a happy future, a finished dream project, and something to be proud of until the day I wither and die.

Somewhere between then and now, I grasped a tiny sliver of bravery and held on for dear life.

I quit my job as a teacher, and instead of accepting a cushy office job, I started behaving as if OUROBOROS and writing was my work (for all the moments I could afford). I have researched and tried different methods from week to week, and although I was still tired from work, I felt like I was onto something that could build into a sustainable future.

I have no doubts that this journey will be bumpy and long, but sometimes all it takes is to take that first step, and do it with determination. It might all crash and burn and fail in a spectacular way, or with a whimper, but then I will know that I have tried. I will know that I gave myself the chance to be who I want to be, work on what means so much to me.

And that’s it. I think the hardest part of formulating this post (I’ve written about 50 versions of it!) is getting to the point; the kernel of what makes it so special to me. So, in my heart of hearts, what I'm trying to tell you is that I'm gonna give it my all- and while I know the road to having a sustainable career in writing is rough and ever winding, I do know for sure that I am ready for a challenge, to pour my heart and soul into it until the day I rush out of the office screaming IT IS DONE. IT IS DOOOOONE!!!

If you decide to join me, I will treasure your company like a lantern in the dark. Hand in lovable hand, let’s fucking go.

#OUROBOROS #ouroboros-if #interactive fiction #hosted games #CYOA #twine #dev log #progress update #honeypeabrain #smacking tags on this post like they're skittles im aiming into a beasts mouth #I DIDN'T REALIZE PATREON WAS GOING TO REVIEW MY PAGE (literally cried about it because I planned everything so meticulously) SOB #anyway :') but a small stepping stone on the long journey ahead #I am going to take the dog for a long walk and then upload the demo/spicy short as I say hello to anyone joining the disc #I hope to see you there :>

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dailylucifernetflix · 9 months

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I wrote a beginning of an ask, clicked at a notification, and got deleted. Never mind that. "I was premaetitevely saying sorry for complaining at fandom stuff in your ask box" pretty much covers what that was. Sorry for that. This. (Or not, if you do want to talk about this stuff.) You are just about the only active Lucifer (TV) blog I know about. I would love to talk about this. This is very out of nowhere.

As I watched the show I (in a I may yet get this sort of a way) wanted, very much, to have a different show than I got. I saw the setup, the characters, their experiences, the events. I enjoyed watching it, but I also wanted for it to be a little more critical and a little less of a comedy. I wanted things to not be played for the laughs as much. I wanted for things to get serious, for Lucifer to be agreed with that he has been hurt, for him to be said to have been done wrong to. And, above that, I wanted that followed through with. I wanted for God to be punished for what he did to him.

Preferably killed in a fun little magic war with magic superpowers, I never expected that to happen in the show. Just in fanfic. I do not think it has happened in fanfic. (this is me asking for fanfic recs, if you have any)

I saw Lucifer. I empathized with Lucifer. With his situation, with his reactions. I saw that he was hurt.

I wanted for him to hurt the person who has hurt him back.

I can think that punishing people is a shit thing that hurts them. I can think that, from a mortal standpoint, punishment is bullshit. God having a redemption arc would have left me satisfied... but, no, I didn't expect that. I did think it was more probable for it to happen than for war on God to happen. But I expected the show to disappoint me.

As I watched it I remember I thought it was not quite brave enough to say what it sometimes showed. That it was not brave enough to straight up say God is a bad guy here. (if it had it would have probably not ran as long as it did, so, fair of it to itself, but still dissatisfying to me as an audience)

I am probably rambling. (I am writing this in an ask box, on mobile. I have accidentally delated three paragraphs. This is the Tumblr experience.)

I saw God do terrible things to Lucifer. I saw that he put him in hell (a terrible place) that he set the world up in a way that allowed for hell to exist (humans can leave, the show says, it is just the guilt that holds them here, but the thing about building a world is that you decide how it works and defending God's actions on the basis of its just how it is is a lot like saying the female characters fight magic wars in bikini and shoot lasers from their boobs because that's just how magic wars work in superhero city) (the world works how the writer decides it does)

This is pretty much just me complaining. I probably dont have a point I am gatting at. (This was brought on by Good Omens Season 2, in a side effect short of way. Mostly I was just reminded that damn remember how you watched that other christianity fanfic, remember how you stared at a wall and imagined a version of it that was more suited to your personal tastes and opinions and also had more superpowers shit because those do always look so cool)

Actually, if there was a point to this, then that point is fanfic. Have you, by chance, ever found the sort of a fanfic that really gets into God Is Bad Let's Wage A War sort of thing? Or if not, then something that approaches it? Something that at least frames God as a villain? Not only Lucifer's-Imaginary-Abusive-Human-Parent (pre-reveal kind of stuff) but full of actual God. Altrough, well, I'd read that too.

I suppose the thing I specifically really want to read is: Ella losing faith, properly so. Linda not just... going wow that's God but going oh shit that's Lucifer's abuser. I suppose I want to read about angels falling from Heaven and being framed as the ones in the right by the narrative. I suppose I want there to be a war. I suppose I would like to read about Hell Economics.

I probably should just write something myself at this point, but I am never very attached to but that's canon and would go if I change this I can change so much many more things to create a world I, myself, would like reading about more, and at that point, this would get very far from what the actual show was doing and I would stare at it and go that is a little too ambitious for me.

Yeah, no, the point of this was: do you by chance have any fanfic recs that you think I would like. Really sorry for bothering you if this bothered you... If you don't want to post this ask (very understandable) but would be open to offering any fanfic recs could you, idk, do a hello to that anon, have some fanfic in a separate post? I would really appriciate that.

...I'll, uh, go ask you about any active Lucifer blogs you know in a separate ask. (the fandom seems dead. is it dead? is it just you here?)

hello dear anon!

ngl reading this was an experience but one that i actually really enjoyed. i loved reading all of your thoughts and some of them i actually understand quite good. i enjoyed what we saw with lucifer but yes, there are some things that were missing for me, too. it's totally okay that you kind of even expected something different from it. you're allowed to have your own opinion.

either way i'm sorry to tell you that i don't read any fanfics but PLEASE if someone who reads this has any fanfic recs specifically like asked above that would be appreciated.

also sorry your initial ask got deleted and also some paragraphs accidentally by yourself. been through that and it's annoying.

the fandom is indeed dead except an occasional gifset every now and then (also by me @mauraeyk lol) i think it's more active on twitter and you're definitely not bothering me. i'm just sorry i can't be more helpful. take care! <3

- kers

#answered #anonymous

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polyamzeal · 6 months

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Omg I just started following you and I'm so mad that the tumblr mobile app won't let me go through your archives!!! I just added a bunch of your book recs to my libby and hoopla tho and I'm excited!!! I'm just kinda bereft because I love Polyam in fanfiction but it seems like there's nothing available in regular trad publishing?? The one book I have been able to find was jade west's sugar daddies. I'm not sure what you'd think of the Polyam depiction tho. Do you have any recs for any polyam romance/erotica? Because like I'd tried briefly to write polyam but didn't get far because I didn't know there were resources like your blog and the books you've rec'd. Do you think you would be like able to recommend any books with good depictions of polyam? I don't mind if they're indie but I'd prefer ebooks so I don't have to explain anything. (I'm not out yet). Thanks for all your help!!!

Quick link to the achieve.

I have read nearly every polyamory nonfiction book but sadly I haven't really read any fiction ones yet. I have heard lots of recommendations here and there but most maybe sounded a bit like a background thing that maybe you need to read deep to even realize. One book I haven't read that I do feel comfortable promoting is Kevin Patterson who wrote Love's Not Colorblind and run @polyrolemodels co-authored For Hire: Operator which is about polyamorous super-heroes! I have been wanting to read it for a while.

Also I wrote a My Hero Academia fanfic once. I want to write more polyamorous fanfiction some day.

#polyamzeal answers #anon ask #Fiction

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the-lunar-warrior · 1 year

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just wrote a Very Salty feedback ticket and idk, i feel like posting the whole thing here too. enjoy, or something

I usually refrain from being this crass when writing feedback, but the direction tumblr seems to be heading is directly detrimental to theplatform. And the new mobile lightbox frankly ssuck, among other things.

I have been using tumblr for close to 10 years. For much of it, I did not use the mobile app — nowadays I've been using it a lot more, and while sometimes annoying and buggy, it was an okay experience. Some of the recent changes, and the much more open communication has been very nice, but some are honestly making me question whether I shouldn't just quit.

I'm on tumblr to use tumblr. If I wanted to use tiktok, I'd open the tiktok app.

The new lightbox, and the way it takes you to a random freaking post if you swipe wrong is atrocious. Sometimes it happens when I'm trying to zoom in. Sometimes when im swiping to the side and I guess it wasn't to the side enough. It's infuriating. It would be infuriating if it only took you to a random post once there is no more photos in the current one, but no — if you swipe wrong at any point bye bye whatever you were viewing, please look at this unrelated post you don't want to see! And don't tell me they are related. I don't care. They are by a random person I don't follow. I don't want an algorithm showing things in my face. Stop it.

In the light of the recent changes, if I was not already a user, I would not become one. And I don't mean it in a "oh changes bad" way, I mean that the way I discovered tumblr has been actively cut off. Back when I first discovered tumblr, sometime in 2012/13, one could view the http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/tag even without account — I scrolled on it for hours by accident. I didn't know what tumblr was, I barely spoke english. I ended up doing that a second time, just to find a specific post — it was an upload of Phoenix by Fall Out Boys, sped up by 10%. I don't know if was uploaded directly to tumblr, but I know it did not force me to go and open spotify, or soundcloud, or any third party website to actually listen to the song. It stayed on tumblr.

Then I found some blogs I liked. I stalked them for months without an account, had them bookmarked. Today tumblr automatically tries to take you to the tumblr.com/username instead of url.tumblr.com, and when it does, it obscures the page and tries to force you to sign up. I would have never gotten invested in tumblr, in the community, if that was the case. If I couldn't freely browse peoples blogs, see their pages — remember pages? Remember that functionality that is becoming obscure instead of you promoting it? People now have a single pinned post where they often have a link to something like linktree or other third party website that lets them to what *tumblr was originally for*. To have a separate about page, or a page with their ships, or interests, their fic they are hosting here, that's *not a post that you have to link* but a url.tumblr.com/about or url.tumblr.com/fic or anything they desire bc it was a BLOG they are hosting on tumblr, not just an account on a social media site.

Remember webcomics hosted on tumblr? People used to do that. As a teen I wanted to do that. But tumblr is silently moving away from that functionality. Is making it harder and harder to use it as I thought intended.

I made an account after months of using tumblr. I sent asks without an account — and after I made one, an irl friend sent me some too, before she got her account. I browsed and read and learned english *without an account*. And when I made one, I made silly pages on my blog, like "people you should follow", or info pages about my ocs, or one that still exists but cannot be accessed from mobile app at all — my about page.

I understand many of the changes. I understand the monetization, and frankly think most of it is very fun and well done. But overall? You're shooting yourself in the foot. You're alienating existing, often long time users, and making it impossible to get into tumblr for possible new ones.

I know one bitter feedback ticket probably won't to anything. But I feel like I need to say all this somewhere. I loved tumblr for so so long, I recommended it to other people — the only way right now for you to get new users other than forcing people — but I don't anymore. I'm considering getting rid of the app from my phone — going back to using tumblr once every couple weeks when I open it on desktop, because... I'm tired. I'm so so tired of seeing things I lovef about tumblr disintegrate in front of me.

Thanks to whoever has gotten this far reading this. Have a nice day.

#tumblr thoughts #i talk sometimes #idk i know that a lot of ppl have been talking about how tumblr is a collaborative social media and how thats its essence or whatever #but i miss when the essence of tumblr was. to have a BLOG #with added perks

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v-l-d-s · 1 year

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USER GUIDE

Hello!!

This blog is dedicated to formatting Valda's Spire of Secrets in such a way that you can search things up and make browse character creation concepts more easily than clicking back on forth on the PDF. It's mobile friendly too!

In order to use it, go to the pinned post, which should be the first post you see even without my hyperlink. That is the Table of Contents! From there, click the links for what you want to explore. Due to Tumblr's awesome tagging feature, those links will take you to a page showing every single race, or all of the subclasses for a specific class, or a single post detailing every single new familiar. 99% of the posts have a short description followed by the words "keep reading." Clicking that will expand the post, showing everything about that subject.

There are a few "hidden tags" that don't appear in the table of contents because they would have made the table of contents way too clunky. You can find them by typing "v-l-d-s.tumblr.com/tagged/[the tag you're looking for]" or using Tumblr's search blog feature which can be buggy sometimes. These hidden tags include the individual names of every class, dXs, and ability scores. For example, searching "Alchemist" will give you everything related to the Alchemist class, including the base class, the subclasses, bomb formulae, and discoveries. Searching d8 will give you every new class with a hit die of d8, and searching "Str" will give you every class and race that gives you a strength boost.

That's the gist of it! Happy DnDing :)

A few things to note:

Posts are in backwards alphabetical order because Tumblr sorts its posts in reverse chronological order and Valda's is in forwards alphabetical order.

I said "All of Valda's." That's technically a lie. I didn't include the flavor text for the new classes, new items, variant rules, or the rules of siegeball. Everything else is taken verbatim from Valda's including any typos (yes, really, I saw some), except for when I have to change the name of Chapters or say "see above" instead of "see below."

I know I misspelled Auxiliary in the tag 😔

Please let me know if you catch any mistakes or think something would be more efficient!!

#User Guide

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prettytragcdies · 11 months

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mun questions! 5, 7, 11, 12, 14.

5. is there a muse you really want to try? if yes: what’s stopping you?

I'm officially writing Lauren Colby from the original Dynasty now, despite the fact that only like me, myself, and I even know who she is, so let's see. I wish that I could write some of my other favorite characters from various shows like Judith Ryland from the reboot of DALLAS, Edie Britt from Desperate Housewives, Julie Cooper from The O.C., etc. I just don't think I could find their voice well enough to keep them in character and write them the way they deserve to be written. I've had to learn the hard way that just because I love a character a whole lot, it doesn't necessarily mean I would be any good at writing them. Then there's also the unfortunate fact that a lot of my favorite shows are ones people from today either don't know anything about or simply just don't write for, but ah well.

I also super duper lowkey want to write an OC Vampire Diaries muse who would be Tyler Lockwood's sister, but that's only because the actress who played Carol Lockwood is back on The Young and the Restless.

7. describe your favorite relationship dynamic. (can be any kind, platonic, romantic, familial, antagonistic, etc.)

That's easy. My favorite relationship dynamic of all time will forever be familial. Mothers and daughters are probably at the tip top of my list, followed closely by fathers and daughters, siblings, etc. Romantic relationships would probably come in second place after all of that, and it's even more fun when the romantic ones eventually turn into new little families. Yeah. I don't know why. I just very much enjoy writing any and all aspects of family.

11. describe your ideal outcome/endgame for the muse you are currently writing. if you are a multimuse blog: do this for your current favorite muse, or the muse of the last reply you posted.

Scarlett Eleanor Ewing is my favorite and the one whose life I have most planned out, so I guess I'll do this one for her. Being married isn't a part of her life she can picture, but the more years I write her, the more I want to see her trying to navigate an actual marriage. So yeah, I guess my ideal endgame would be for her to be either President or Vice President of Ewing Global and either married or divorced with at least one child. I want her to be happy and healthy, despite everything I've put her through to get to that point lol. She's still hella confident and entitled, but some things aren't ever going to change, no matter what.

12. what roleplay trends do you remember from the year you started tumblr rp? how did you feel about those trends?

You know you're officially getting old when you don't even remember but like one or two of the trends from that year. I feel like it was 2011 or sometime around then, and groups were where it was at back then. I joined a small handful, and they were okay. Just like everything else, they had their fair share of pros and cons. I also remember people used gifs more than they did icons back in those days, and I didn't mind that part at all. Sometimes it can be more fun to use gifs, as long as they aren't huge and stretch all the way across your reply, especially when you're scrolling through on a mobile dashboard.

14. which roleplay community has been your favorite to write in?

I know everyone is probably expecting me to say DALLAS, and while it certainly is one of my favorites, I also need to give a shoutout to the soap opera world. I made so many friends in that genre back in the day, some of which I'm still in close contact with today. We've just had so much fun together over the years, and tbh it's part of the reason why I've had so much muse for Lauren Colby and Serenity Scorpio lately. One of my old friends lured me back to RP.ME ( a.k.a. MySpace 2.0 ), and I've officially fallen back down the rabbit hole(s).

#x.| we'll probably have take three ( ooc )#mischiefxmanagcd

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whentheresmoonlight · 2 years

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Ok I read your post. Literally sat down with my cup of morning coffee first thing in the morning and read it start to finish. I was busy traveling which is why I'm just getting back to you now though, by ask because my followers probably aren't expecting a reblogged discussion of top/bottom dynamics on my otherwise sfw blog.

So let me know if I'm getting this right:

Like, Bakugo wanting to give something to Izuku he would never give anyone else (the vulnerability, I mean!!! not, y'know, access to his... god, just forget it). And their relationship has shifted so fundamentally since when they were kids, multiple times, and opening up (figuratively!!) in such a way to Izuku is just another way for him to shift from whatever toxic shit they had going on earlier to the mutual love and understanding and willingness to be vulnerable with each other they have now. I don't even know if that makes sense. The point is, I totally hc them as vers now.

Also Izuku taking charge. It really is such a huge part of his character, becoming stronger and a leader and more confident and it's so easy to set that aside and focus on his cute, bubbly side but my man's got both! Honestly it's why I tend to avoid fics in general, and fandom too (tho I'm weak and couldn't stay away from mha/bkdk tumblr). I'm always afraid that the versions of characters in my head will be fanonized. I hope I didn't do that to Izuku and Kacchan, ykwim? :| (If you ever wanna like, idk, 👉👈 check out one of my fics and tell me if you think I got them right, that would be cool but no worries if not.)

Also I get what you mean about the feminized Izuku, no shade to anyone who likes that (I mean, he did wear a maid costume in MHA Smash and he does look cute with puppy dog eyes and bunny ears) but omega/bunny/thicc/size-difference Izuku isn't really my thing because... Well, I prefer canonverse too and I've rewatched dvk2 like four times and for me it really hammers home that their power dynamic has evened out so any dom/sub-type dynamic doesn't feel like it fits.

[also re: soyboy. If you check my blog on mobile, it has the urban dictionary definition of soyboy as the header. Plus the first syllable of my irl name sounds like "soy" so that's why I picked it haha :) ]

I'm so flattered that you bothered to read all that word vom! I hope that you're traveling for something fun, or at least that the travels go well. And yeah, please, keep your blog sfw if that's what it is, lol. I'm such a mess in that respect.

But yes, I'd say you've distilled my opinion! Thank you, haha. Squeezed some good puns in there as well. I'm glad you've been pulled over to vers, tho 😈 I know I said that I wasn't trying to convert you, but let's face it, I'm always lowkey trying to convert people, hahahaha. I wish I weren't but I just want people to like what I like, lol.

The way you broke my heart when you said you avoid fics 💀 Let me send you recs! I think I've got an idea of your taste and I can PROMISE quality! However, avoiding fandom is a good choice, haha. Like, I'm happy about all the friends I'm making, and I have a very visceral need to have many many bkdkbks to scream about our boys with, but at the same time, there are a lot of ways in which I was happier in past fandoms where I wasn't involved in the fandom beyond reading and writing fanfic. I could engage with only the content I enjoyed much easier. So, you know, some of this, some of that.

I'd totally read your stuff! Message me or otherwise lmk what one you want me to try and I'll word vom at you again!

#omg i had no clue that's what soyboy meant 💀#how embarrassing #i feel so old #actualsoyboy #anjum answers #not/sfw

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ofgentleresolve · 1 year

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FERRE MIGHTY FERRE DID I EVER MENTION HOW DEAR YOU ARE TO ME? LET ME COUNT ALL THE WAYS I CARE YOU~ Seriously, though, you're one of those people that I sigh about dreamily while kicking my leggies, one of those people I don't need to double check on name-spelling anymore because I'm always yelling about you, one of those people who both on mobile and on laptop my searchbar auto-fills the url of because I'm simply that big of a stan.

To have you not only as part of my Tumblr experience but also as someone I am so blessed and thrilled to call my friend, I can't begin to describe how soft it makes my tiny heart. The warmth you add to my dash and my DMs simply by being there, because I can't ever get enough of the notion that I get to cradle our friendship to my chest like a goblin would a precious gem.

I seriously can't put it into words, I am so happy that I know you? You're such a wonderful presence in my life that I don't even want to entertain the memory of when you weren't, the relaxed maturity with which you talk about certain things, your thoughts and your views and the way you treat life as a whole, you've somehow become a presence, an energy in my life that I didn't know would feel this awesome and wonderfully right.

You're so cool and neat and dedicated and?? I can't even gather all the adjectives I want, seriously. It's why I throw 'mighty' around so often, you are simply THE MIGHTIEST, I love your emojis (weird thing to add out of nowhere but I just LOVE THEM SO), the way you reach out and check in, I'm enough of a stan and simp to genuinely find it so neat how you communicate. It's just I LUB all aspects of 'Ferre' I get to experience and that I got to do so all the way to the end of 2022 is a blessing I can't thank you enough for.

For into 2023 and as long as you'll have me, I hope to be able dedicated more yeeting and blabbering to my massive case of 'Ferre Stanning' so I can have even more to yell about at the next New Year ♥

@mythvoiced so len is making me go 🥺🥺🥺

LENA LENA MY DEAR LENA 🥺🥺🥺🥰

Not me smiling SO WIDELY when I saw this in my inbox 🥰🥰🥰 I will admit, I had not been the greatest of moods coming into the new year BUT THIS?? Gave me LOTS OF SERATONIN in which I am SO HONORED to have the respect and attention of someone who is so sincere and kind and just gives off both REAL and positive vibes 🥺 makes me really wonder what I did to get ur attention fsjdklfjsdl :’D

But but!! Lmao I am glad you straight up admit to having my url in your autofill for ur searchbar….bc I am also very much the same way with ur blog JFLSKDJF I PROMISE IT’S FOR A GOOD REASON 😂😂😂 but let me get back to my point here- I know you probably know this about me already, but coming back to tumblr rpc for me back in 2021 had been a rather daunting experience and one thing I really wanted this time around was to be surrounded by genuinely good and sincere ppl who cared about their mutuals both as writers BUT ALSO as ppl….i will admit, I did lurk from afar for a like, a month or two before following to see what kind of person could possibly be running this blog- and I will say!! From when I started lurking, I already got very good vibes and once we started actually writing and plotting 2gether, I was not disappointed 😌😌😌

I think for me, what sticks out the most about you on this hellsite is just?? you’re so sincere in how you present yourself here and there’s something so inherently cheerful about the vibes I get from you, but it never like?? borders on toxic posivity?? I think it really has to do with the fact that we get to see both your highs and lows the fact that you are never trying to masquerade it, and that you are always truthful with yourself on here- what your limits are, which makes me in turn?? Feel comfortable with also being more open about myself knowing that when I do interact with you, I’m not going to be wondering if the person on the other side of the screen is being nice to me for ulterior motives….they’re ( you! ) being nice because they WANT to be :’DDD

but , but!! I just also wanted to note?? That like, you know how within the rpc there’s always like these posts about how ‘you should interact with your mutuals’ or ‘spread kindness and positivity throughout the community’ and like, sure!! It’s good to see those post, but I think one thing that really really makes me admire you is how you?? actually PRACTICE that idea of being kind and positive- I see it in the way you seem to never run out of energy to give and show LOVE to ur mutuals, the way you go out of your way to bring some cheer onto their blogs whether that’s thru messages such as these but also in ur tags and comments…but then also making a priority to make them and their characters feel seen and heard….i honestly think that is SUCH a rare thing to find in an rp partner :’D and I am 100% honest when I say this- I think anyone who gets to be mutuals with you and gets to write with you is a VERY LUCKY individual….makes me wonder how you came admire me :’DDD

LMAO THANK YOU FOR ALSO NOTICING THE WAY I USE EMOJIS TOO 😂😂😂 I just?? feel more comfy with using them in sets of three bc I like the way it feels when press command+v three times – didn’t realize that’s supposed to be a stylic choice JFLKSJDLFJ

As we jump into 2023, I hope can continue?? To be a warm presence on ur dashboard and dms as you have been for me and I WILL DO MY BEST!! To be that sorta older sibling figure on here 4 u as well ( lmao fun fact, I’m actually the youngest sibling so this is very new to me 🥲🥲🥲 ) for as long as you’ll have me around <3

I hope your new year went well len and I HOPE ?? YOU’RE HAVING A WONDERFUL DAY- care u and adore u lots 💕💕💕

#mythvoiced #( saved for ferre. )#LENA PLS THIS IS SO SWEET AND I AM JUST 🥺🥺🥺#a time where i wasnt mutuals with u??#shhhhh that didn't exist #didn't know sunlight until i actually felt it 😌😌😌#if u don't think i won't wax about why len is a great person both ic and ooc #u don't know me at all 😌😌😌#lena deserves the best and u should absolutely follow them bc they are so kind and good to their mutuals and the proof is literally #in their tags #and their mutuals' ooc posts comments sections #fite me on this and i'll WIN 😌#me?? sleath simping psh that's for amateurs #in this community we go hard or go home JFLKSJDLFKJ #BUT ALSO THANKS LENA!!#for not just sending this in but also just being you on this hellsite #adore you lots 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

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wyrmcat · 2 years

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HEY NEWBIES! TUMBLR BASICS

if you're not used to this site, social media can be all "unalive" this and "algorithm" that, here's the skinny on what tumblr is, from someone who's been enjoying this dumb but also great safehaven of a site since around ehhhhh 2013~14? (made to follow flipnote artists after the service shut down, but didn't dive in right away)

VVV - BEGINS BELOW THE CUT - VVV

POST!!!! This place only has content if people post! i think the most "mainstream" person on here is neil gaiman and he's just kinda hanging out REBLOG!!!! Good rule of thumb is to think of your blog as like... a scrapbook or a casual space. TAG TW/CW IF ASKED! This is more of a courtesy thing if you have a mutual (someone who follows you back) who asks to tag triggers or content warnings. - HOWEVER while this is not technically mandatory, and can be tedious especially on mobile, people generally ask only if they have to. Just use discretion and conversation to gauge this kind of interaction, or suggest to them they they don't follow you (KINDLY) if you dont tag anything ever and are more casual. TAG TIPS! - Tag your tw/cw tags (i.e. #cw alcohol) BEFORE you do other tags. I'm pretty sure I read a while back Tumblr's broken ass search function (we will get to that) will only categorize based off of the first 4 (four) tags. - while there is a distinct "style" to talking or commenting in the tags, don't worry too much about it. Just keep in mind most will read a start and stop between two tags as a pause, and that its easier for people to read them if they're a bit more broken up than a big block. - last but not least, keep in mind op can and most likely will read tags for the comments despite there being a comment section. its a little more of a distance than directly commenting, but they are still seen. i cannot stress enough that you MUST forget about "growth, reach, engagement ect." This is a community you build yourself by following, reblogging, commenting, and blocking. (and a few little housekeeping things to finish up because this long enough as it is) - your blog is YOUR space, and that means that not only is it mostly meant for you, but you are also responsible for the content you circulate. Do your best not to reblog or post misinformation or harassment. - This is one of the last large "old" internet community platforms, and is only kept running by the people who care enough to post, follow and reblog. If you think tumblr is boring, that's kind of up to you to fix as your feed is first and foremost people you follow. - Be kind. I know it sounds cheesy, but I mean it. So much of social media outside of here is malicious, goading, and ruthlessly cruel. Think twice before commenting something snarky or sarcastic towards people you dont know or may not understand the tone of the sentiment. But also be generous and abundant with your kindness towards artists and other blogs who post original content you enjoy! - It's not about how much you hate a bad thing, but how much effort you put into showing intentional love and kindness to the good things. While this does not apply to all things, I think it matters a lot more to people you defend for you to support and uplift them through negativity and bigotry being hurdled at them. I hope this wasn't too much of your time if you're new, and I hope it wasn't condescending to you if you're a regular like me, haha. If I got anything wrong, or was off about something, please let me know or explain below how you would word it differently! I'm by no means above correcting myself. Happy Blogging! (Or would it be tumbling?)

(p.s. Make sure to reblog this so other new users might see it!)

#long post #tumblr advice #twitter #help #just wanted to talk about how tumblr works today i suppose #hope it helps someone at least

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loving-bucky-is-easier · 2 years

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hello, my loves!

today marks one year since i created this blog. i could never have imagined that i'd be celebrating it with more than 1500 of you. so please, join me for a paper anniversary sleepover from 25 february to 1 march.

@divine-mistake had never heard of a "paper anniversary," so for those of you who are cooler than me, it just means one year. (the tenth anniversary is tin, the fiftieth is gold, the sixtieth is diamond, etc.)

sappy rambling, plus the details on how to join in the sleepover, below the cut.

(skip to the next divider to skip the sappy ramble)

in january of 2021, i got back on tumblr. my mental health was struggling more than it had in a while, and i had begun to realize how unhealthy my living environment was for me; i was craving interaction with kinder, more tolerant people. so, i got back on the aesthetic blog i'd created in high school, @loving-books-is-easier.

not that you asked, but the blog title was originally @/booksnotboys, but when i realized i liked non-boys too, i didn't want to exclude them.

the 30-some followers of that blog had followed me for my aesthetic, or maybe for my one niche "survivor" shitpost that got like 40 notes for some reason. they were not there for the marvel fanfic community that i soon found and fell in love with. i created this page on 22 february 2021 as a home for the fics that i loved, and for some stories of my own. @wkemeup's writing challenge was the push i needed to start.

for several days, i started writing a story in my head. i was hosting at a restaurant at the time, and one of the host responsibilities a la covid was to act as a crossing guard between the main restaurant patio and the satellite tent seating. none of the hosts ever wanted this job (gee, i wonder why no one wanted to stand alone outside in january wearing a neon vest to almost get hit by cars), but i took it at every opportunity because it was mindless and allowed me to just think about my plot.

on 25 february 2021, i started actually writing the story out. i wrote the entire thing in the tumblr post creator because i was very dumb and apparently wanted to risk losing 13k words at any given time. i also wrote a lot of it on mobile, and when i hit the 250 text block limit, i would type

bunch

words

this

on desktop before i went anywhere so i would have extra paragraphs to work with. on 1 march 2021, i posted it.

deadweight is now somehow sitting at nearly 2500 notes, and i have all of you to thank for that. i don't even know where to begin.

more than that, in this year on tumblr i met some of my best friends and a slew of other wonderful mutuals and followers who are both brilliant creators and incredible people.

all that to say, i'm celebrating with a paper-themed sleepover, and i hope you'll join me.

the schedule for the sleepover is listed below. i will start posting on friday 25 february and run through tuesday 1 march.

when can i start sending prompts in?

prompts are welcome any time during the sleepover, on or before the day they're going to be addressed. but feel free to start sending requests now, so i have something to start the day with.

how many requests can i send?

send in as many as you like; i will try to get to as many as possible, although i cannot guarantee that i will address every request.

are there any rules for requests?

requests surrounding drabbles must still be within my regular request guidelines (see those here).

did you spend too much time figuring out how to make all of your days paper-themed?

absolutely.

friday. 25 february.

📑 post-it notes on top

i'd like to add figurative post-it notes to my fics. that is, extra little moments to the pairing's dynamic, glimpses into their future, elaborations on their relationships.

send in requests for any of my existing fics with questions you have about their past, present, or future moments. i'll do my best to answer, potentially in drabble form.

saturday. 26 february.

💌 a love letter for you

let me show your writing a little love. send me one of your fics to review... i might even make a little doodle or moodboard to go with my thoughts.

sunday. 27 february.

🔖 my dance card is open

let's talk about music, my loves.

send me a song or a playlist to review.

ask for a song that reminds me of you or your blog.

send me a song, and i'll tell you what character it reminds me of and why.

(probably no song-based drabbles--it took me months to get through those from my last celebration, and i still have a few coming.)

monday. 28 february.

📝 scribbles in the margins

we're going behind the scenes, for my fics or for yours.

ask me about where i got certain ideas, which fics presented what challenges, things that i cut (from little moments to entire plotlines), or what moments were the origin of the entire fic itself.

or, tell me these things about your own fics. i want to know!

tuesday. march 1.

🖋 adding new pages

let's add some new pieces to the masterlist. talk to me about my wips (i'll post an updated list the day of), or send in some requests. i'll work on as many of them as i can.

i'm so, so thankful for you all, so please come hang out with me at this silly little celebration!

#megs paper anniversary #thank you all for supporting me #marvel sleepover

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samshogwarts · 3 years

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My review of 2020

Or: I say thank you.

First of all, sorry for the long post 😅. You guys know I don'tike long posts without a "read more under the line". But I nade the post with my mobile phone.... Aaaaaaaanyway. Also sorry for all the tags. I hope I don't annoyed someone with it <~<. So let's continue:

I think this year has been a particularly difficult year for everyone. As 2020 is drawing to a close, I mentally let the year pass again.

The bottom line is that I have to say that 2020 was turbulent for me, but not necessarily bad. Much good, but also bad, has happened. And I want to start with the bad things right away.

At the beginning of the year, my depression and eating disorder relapsed. I've always had trouble talking about it because I know my friends can't handle this issue. I felt pressured because they wanted to do things with me, but I couldn't. So I withdrew completely, hiding my emotions and wearing a mask.

At that time I created this blog. At first I didn't want to create my own content, just follow the content of @ladycibia, @hogwartsmystory and @kyril-hphm. Incidentally, that is also the reason why I call these 3 blogs the Big Three. So it's their fault that I'm here. Lol.

And then the first Hyops message came at the end of March. A very good friend of mine got Corvid-19 and lost the battle against the disease a few days later. I still remember how the news pulled the floor from under my feet. It feels like I completely lost faith in everything and I started to realize how dangerous this year could be.

But life goes on and so I visited a friend and her family in early July. It was the anniversary of her husband's death, who was also a very good friend of mine. He died of cancer last year and I couldn't go to his funeral. So I wanted to stop by on the day he died. I actually thought I could do it. But when you read a friend's name on a tombstone for the first time.. Guys, that's a punch in the stomach like no other and I can't really describe how it feels. I had made up my mind not to cry in front of his wife or children because it was hard enough for them. Didn't work.

And of course this year meant to go one better.

Another friend of mine died of the virus in mid-August, leaving behind a wife and a child. Again, I was unable to attend the funeral. And to be honest, it still bothers me way more I want to admit. In two years I lost three wonderful people who meant a lot to me and I couldn't say goodbye to any of them. When I see the three of them again after my death, you can be sure I'll kick their butts for it.

But August was the worst month for me in many ways. In addition to the death of my buddy, my father's family also volunteered. And that means only one thing - trouble. And properly. I haven't had contact with this family for over 12 years for good reason. Now one person from this family has passed away. And first of all, I don't really care if anyone of them would die. I don't even know the person who passed away. But I wasn't told either by my grandmother or my father. So my deadline to cancel the inheritance has expired. Of course it was debts. You have to know that the inheritance rights of my country are very complicated. The reason my father or grandmother didn't tell me about it was because they didn't want to bother with the paperwork. They always had the opportunity to contact me via Facebook or my half-sister. But that would mean work for them. And while I was walking from lawyer to lawyer to court to court, I was allowed to hear sayings from my grandmother that I apparently have achieved nothing in my life. Nice to know that some people never change. I'm still struggling with this matter to this day and will probably not be able to fully clarify this until the beginning of 2021.

At the end of October everything seemed to be taking its revenge and I passed out at a friend's house. Nobody knows exactly what happened until today, but my friend took me to the hospital where I had to stay one night. That was Halloween. And I'm such a big fan of hospitals hahahaha hahahaha. After that I was allowed to wear an ECG for 2 weeks and it turned out that my heart values had deteriorated. Why not. Let's just take everything with us this year!

Rounding out the negatives this year was my (as a teenager) best friend's suicide. I have to say that I haven't had any contact with this person for 9 years. However, it is the one who cut herself in her youth and then called me afterwards because she didn't know what to do. It was also the one I tried to get into therapy for 2 years. But her mother was always against it. And it was exactly this mother who was standing in my mother's shop, telling her about her daughter's suicide and that I was probably in the farewell letter. I don't know exactly what it said, but the mother now blames me for her daughter's suicide. And do you know what's craziest about the whole thing? I agreed with her! I really thought it was my fault because I knew how sick my former friend was. Yet I was the one who ended the friendship (for many reasons that had nothing to do with her depression). And I still wonder what would have happened if I had acted differently.

But enough of the negative things! A lot of nice things happened this year too. Among other things, I have found a new job within my group, earn more money and have pleasant working hours. I've renovated my apartment and I've started saving money on a new one. My two nieces are now going to school and I am a proud aunt. My male best friend and his girlfriend (my best harry potter friend) are pregnant and are expecting their first child soon and my mother's health is better.

But one of the best things that happened to me this year is this blog.

I already mentioned that I actually only created this blog to stalk the Big Three. I didn't want my own content at all. But I discovered more and more blogs and these incredibly great MCs that I thought I wanted to do whole too. And so Samantha O'Connell was born.

I received so much great support and encouragement on this platform. I don't think many people even realize how much that means to me. Especially this year.

I have also found great and lovable people here, some of whom I also call my friends. Even if we come from other countries, speak other languages and may never see each other in real life, you are my friends and I am grateful to know you.

@annabelle-tanaka-official : I'll start with you of course! XD on tumblr you are just my best friend. I don't write as much with anyone as I do with you. You are such an incredibly talented person and so warm hearted! Over the year we have invented so many insiders that soon nobody will know what we mean. Be it the monster hug, or that my cats are your spies or our many RP scenarios, which I really enjoy and which always make me laugh. I thank you for that!! I love you so much and I am so glad that we are friends! *minster hug*

@lunasilvermorny / @lunasilvermore : you are next to you !!! XD the next person I write to almost every day. What started with a little conversation about among us has turned into a friendship. I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to streaming with you next year (and this year)!!! You are such a good listener that strengthens me. Your support is so nice of you too! Just the fact that you have subscribed to my YouTube channel xD (because of the language I even have an idea). I'm looking forward to the next year with you! Thank you so much for dealing with my craziness and still likes me!

@kyril-hphm : muahahahaha. You can't escape me !!! Yes, what should I say? One of my big three even made friends with me. One of my Senpais noticed me! And then it's a lovely fluffy marshmallow! I still think it's funny that we have such similar circuits and hearts! Nevertheless you are an incredibly honest, loving and talented person. I've never told you before, but sometimes I stare (for 20 minutes +) at your drawings to improve my style (just not working so far). You are an honest person and I am happy every time we talk, or when you react to my content. I would like to say thank you for that too! You are great and you can trust yourself more.

@carewyncromwell : my Chinese fireball, my Disney princess. Yes, for me you exude the aura of a Disney princess and nothing can change my mind. So! You were one of the first friends I made here on tumblr and one of the first to write with me! I still remember how proud and nervous I was back then! Just when I was in the hospital on Halloween and couldn't sleep that night, you kept texting me and distracting me from my fear. That means a lot to me. You are such a creative and lovable person too. Ah, that's just amazing. Your comments or hashtags always make me grin or laugh. Thank you for all your support and help!

@catohphm : my fluffier Ravenclaw brother!!! Of course you can't be missing either. I also write with you almost every day and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words and your support. I just love the energy between Samantha and Cato. And it's always fun to write RP with you! Thank you for being such a lovely and kind person!

@mira-shard : MIRAAAAAAA! It's kind of funny how long we've basically walked next to each other without talking to each other. And now I don't want to miss you anymore! You are such a fun and happy person. Writing with you is just fun! I also love your cosplay photos. Someday I'll come to visit you, and then we'll do cosplay shootings together until the camera bleeds! I would also like to thank you for your support and your kindness.

@sirfluffig : ha. I hope you didn't think you were escaping me! Where should I start with you? Maybe that you were one of the first to give me such lovely feedback on Samantha? Or this super funny stream and that you helped me to stream in English? Or just like that, when we talk about our MCs or pen and paper. It's definitely always fun. I want to thank you for that and I'm looking forward to playing together again soon (get Among us)

@nightrhea-hphm : * run into you in slowmotion * Night! My wonderful supportive Gremlin! I've grown very fond of them over the years. And your support and feedback are just amazing. I also love the friendship between Night and Samantha. I think it's very similar to ours, right? You are also such an incredibly creative and lovable person. You make you feel like it's ok to be who you are. Thank you!

Of course there are many, many more like @rosievixen, @wangxianforever000 , @mollydarling-hphm , @morningstarinwinter , @hogwarts9, @hphm-brooke , @raymondhope-writer , @nikyiscreepy , @immagrosscandy , @mizutoyama , @ariparri-hphm and many many more.

I want to thank you all for your encouragement, support and feedback. You are the reasons why I am adding more and more details to this blog, why I dared to start with the fan comic and many more.

It's still so amazing for me to meet so many talented, creative, kind and funny people.

This year showed me again that life isn't just black or white. Life is Grey. Good things and bad things happen. Sometimes one side more than the other side. But as long we are taking the next step, life wl continues. Just keep in mind, as like you support me, I want to support you. So if you ever wanna talk, no matter what, remember you guys can always contact me.

I'm really looking forward to next year and already have so many plans. I can not wait any longer. Enjoy the last days of the year, stay safe and most important: they the way you are guys!

Love you all so much.

#My end of the year thank you #Personal #Ooc #My year 2020 #God my heart beating so fast #Don't know why but these post makes me nervous #Very personal #Cry counter while writing this: 4 #Yeah so adult xD #Like I care #Hope you all enjoyed the Christmas holidays #Love you all #Such a great community #Never saw this before #💙❤️💚💛

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