#i cant handle going out when it overlaps with that! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

spaceless-vacuum · 1 year

Text

Fandom‧˚｡ﾟ･° ｡✎ Legend of Zelda

Pairing‧˚｡ﾟ･° ｡✎ Link x reader (twilight, courage, legend, wars, four, koridai, ravio, time, sky, hyrule, wild, calamity and wind)

Word count‧˚｡ﾟ･° ｡✎ 2047

Summery‧˚｡ﾟ･° ｡✎ Little snippits for how I think theyd react to helping care for a sick reader

Misc‧˚｡ﾟ･° ｡✎ third person pov, non-specified illness, each section is short but to the point, i didnt second draft this

Twilight:

He grew up in a small town where everyone knew each other and was the sort of person who always helped out. More than that there were several kids in the village that he helped out with so when you come down with something he wastes no time telling you that you need to take it easy and get some rest. He's a blanket and his cloak to keep you warm, if it gets too hot let him know and he'll get a damp cloth, and if you need to throw up let him know so he can hold your hair back.

Twilight stays by your side and monitors your condition as he does small activities to keep the both of you occupied. It's easy to tell he has done this with smaller kids before because the way he handles it is a lot like how a mother would with a young child.

Courage:

Not only is this a mission, it's a personal one. He decides that you shouldn't walk in your weakened state and will try to pick you up bridal style so he can show off how strong he is while helping you all at the same time. Even if it's not that far of a walk he's just trying his best to make sure you know you can rely on him.

He keeps a cup of water by your bed stand and a box of tissues there just in case. He'll bring you food and will read to you if you wish. If you want to walk he'll give you his arm to lean on. Courage isn't afraid of getting sick because he's too busy thinking of all the ways he can be obnoxious in his attempts to flirt with you.

Legend:

“Don’t worry I have something that can help” and then he spends the next hour going through all of his belongings to find what ehs looking for. Ok that's a lie he has a method to his madness and vaguely knows where everything is. He has cures and tinctures that range from mundane, to magical, to just strange. Yeah a flaming sword may not seem like it would help but keeping it close will warm you up won't it?

It’s so strange how he just hands you some strange object and explains in a few offhand sentences that it might be this one semi-magical object he picked up one time but it should do something that will make you feel better. If nothing else, trying to find out exactly what it is is fun and engaging. Like a puzzle but just for your head.

He doesn't really know how to help that well but he’s there if you need him, even if he doesn't know exactly what to do he'll try his best.

Warrior:

He is one of those people who will help but it’s more of by letting you have the day off. He doesn't get sick often, blaming it on his superior training and a healthy diet, but when he does get sick he overreacts so badly. Even if it's just a common cold or a light sniffle it's a huge deal to him. During those times he likes to be alone so he can handle it himself and since it happens so little it's almost like a day off. He can spend it doing whatever he wants as long as it's a light activity that won't make things worse.

Which is to say that when you get sick he just leaves you to it. You know what works best for you and he knows what works best for him. Not that there cant be overlap but he'll get you anything you need and offer you assistance but besides the times he checks up on you if you don't ask him to stay he won't. Mostly just so you can have some time alone for whatever you want.

Four:

He’s not sure what to do but he's happy to help if you need him. I can see him dropping by, finding out you're sick, and spending the day with you; or you're sick and drop by for a visit and he insists that you stay by the forge while he goes to pick some healing herbs that will help. There's snacks at the forge if you get hungry, if you need to nap there's the bedroom upstairs, and a place or two to sit on the floor. It’s not that he doesn't want to help but with Four he doesn't know how to help unless you give him specific requests.

Koridai:

No time to waste he will take this as a chance to prove he is just made of boyfriend material. He is flirting with you and staying close to your side. No matter how much you push him away he just brushes past it and says that he can't leave you alone, not while you're in such a fragile state. Doesn't matter how small the cold is, he has decided that making you swoon isn't just a part time job but something to do at every available option.

Time:

Does Time know how to help? Not exactly; yet that won't stop him from trying! Checking up on you is a given but what he brings you is a little strange? He’ll get you some warm milk because it'll help you sleep and milk is good for your bones. Yeah ok it's not the best for this situation but he's so sweet about it that it helps no matter what he gives you. Just checking up on you and gently shaking you awake so he can hand you a leaf he picked up off the ground.

Hell kneel down by the bed and explain he was searching around the woods for something to help you. So he wound up walking to the deku tree, hanging out there for a bit, and remembering that when was a kid and sick he would spend time in nature, and he brought you back a leaf from his adventure. He checks you temperature and then leaves you to get more rest.

Ravio:

He decides that laughter is the best medicine and will do anything to make you laugh or cheer you up. Telling jokes and stories when he's by your side and making sure you are as comfortable as possible. He'll get you anything you need and the price is what you would expect. Just no kisses, you are sick and he can't afford to catch it. He has a shop to run after all.

When no customers are in the store he'll run by your place and check up on you. Nothing that will take up too much time because he can't shut down his shop or anything. On his lunch break he'll stop by a stall and buy some food for the two of you to share and something sweet to eat to keep your spirits up.

Sky:

I see Sky as the type of hero to overwork himself. Even when he is sick he just assumes it'll go away on its own, and sometimes even pushes himself harder because he doesn't want to fail as a hero. Even if other people see him get sick he will deny how bad it is and underplay it. It's a bad habit but he doesn't expect this from others.

When you get sick it's all hands on deck. He refuses to let you overextend yourself the way he does and will assign you to your room and you can't leave unless it's a short walk. You can't even let him talk you into riding a loftwing because the cold air won't be good for you, cold weather is how you get sick after all.

Which can mean a boring day stuck inside but he makes it as fun as possible. Choosing to skip class or call in sick as well he stays with you so you don't have to stare at a brick wall all day. Rather he plays games with you, reads you books, and will nap with you until you feel better. He even brings you food from the school's cafeteria so that way you can eat in bed.

Hyrule:

Because I know that in a post apocalyptic situation there might be a doctor you can visit but more than likely you're doing this all on your own. Just hunker down so that way you don't get into a fight while in a weakened state and hope it isn't actually serious. Not every cough means you're about to die but who knows at this point it could lead to something worse. So staying put and focusing on getting better is the plan.

Due to Hyrule having healing magic and having done a thing or two before he is in full medic mode and will be acting both as a doctor and a nurse. Providing support and comfort while giving you warm herbal teas that don't taste too good but will help with whatever it is you have. Any symptom is treated to the best of its abilities and he's less worried about the illness and more managing and stopping it from spreading or getting worse. So that means bedrest.

With how dangerous it is being outside he wouldn't want you out there on a normal day and especially not now.

Wild:

He makes you soup. Just soup. He knows it's good for when you get sick so he's making you something rich and creamy like french onion or chicken and dumpling. It’s probably the best soup you will ever have (minus Wind’s grandmother's soup.) Food that's good for the soul is the best support for you right now.

He insists that you have to stay back and not do anything. Take an easy day inside or relax at camp. He'll stay with you or in the general area so you're never truly alone. He wouldn't want you to get caught off guard due to being sick or asleep. He keeps the fire lit at night and keeps you entertained with stories so you don't die of boredom sitting there.

Wind:

His first thought is to get you something to help and it’s worth getting sick over just so you can have some of Grandma’s soup. Not joking, it's delicious and it really does fill you with hope. It’s what he always gets when he's sick so he's glad he gets to share some with you.

If you're able to go outside he encourages it because fresh air is always good for but especially when you're sick. If you can't leave your house he'll have you open up some windows. Throughout the day as he passes by he'll shout at your window to see if you're ok and tell you what he's doing. He’ll make a game out of it by saying you're missing the wildest of things happening all over the island and acting like it must be such torture being trapped inside.

Really he just misses your company. Being sick sure does suck too bad he never gets sick and won't ever wind up like you.

To help you feel better he’ll bring you sticks and things he found outside so that way you can feel like you're still part of the outside world. Its he's way of saying he's worried about you and wants you to get better.

Calamity:

Due to all the pressure around him trying to be the hero Hyrule needs and the war going on he finds this more of a break or vacation than anything else. It is terrible that you came down with a sickness but he gets to spend time with you and not have to worry about anything else besides making sure you're ok. This is a win win.

No one else is around and if someone does come to check up on the two of you they don't stay for long. Which makes it a wonderful time to have some heart to heart talks and for him to let his guard down. It doesn't happen often and it really brings out the side of him that smiles and laughs and isn't always struggling to not crack or break under the pressure.

#eye write #link x reader #linked universe x reader #lu warriors #lu wind #lu sky #lu four #lu time #lu twilight #lu legend #lu ravio #lu hyrule #lu courage #lu koridai #cdi link #lu wild #lu calamity

211 notes · View notes

fipindustries · 3 months

Text

my personal version of the trinity

im talking about the dc super heroes, batman superman and wonder woman, not the son the father and the holy spirit.

i've always had my own version of these characters is my head and i would like to put it here for you guys to see. im sure a lot of this is going to overlap what a lot of what's already been done, that is inevitable give these characters longevity.

in a general sense, before we get into specifics, the way i think of these three, and of dc heroes in general, is that wherever they are they are the adults in the room. they are the conception that a kid has of an adult. professional, mature, always in control, always knows what to do in any situation, nearly omnipotent capacity to make all problems go away.

for these three i think of them as first responders, as firemen or paramedics. they are the people who come into a diaster, assess the situation and have a plan and a script to tackle it in the appropiate manner.

they know how to evacuate civilians, how to administer first aid, what is the order of priorities, etc. when they come in to save the day they are doing a job and they are good at it, they are the best at it, they are the people you want handling whatever it is that is happening.

all of this implies a certain level of maturity and professionalism that i expect from them. im not a fan of whenever these heroes are shown as super emotional, wether it be driven by rage or brooding, we have marvel for that. like yes, things can obviously get to them and enemies can deploy psychological attacks but generally they are emotionally mature enough to handle most things thrown their way.

i also like to think of them as mainly problem solvers rather than fighters or combatants (with the exception perhaps of wonder woman, more on that later). them simply going with raw fists to punch problems away is an absolute last resort if there is no other way to solve the problem. otherwise they toolset is wide enough that they can find clever, efficient, practical ways to deal with threats. im sure there are few threats superman cant solve without making judicious and calculated use of his super speed and his laser. double and triple goes for batman.

also, if i were to have absolute dictatorial control over DC i would make it so that they are not necessarily fighting a monster of the week style threat but rather that they have overarching goals and every mission is a step closer to that goal. and once their respective cities are stable enough they are free to establish the justice league to protect the world of overzised threats like alien invasions or pandimentional attacks.

without further ado here we go

superman.

honestly not much new, the guy has been done flawlessly plenty of times. i am particularly fond of the superman from My adventures with superman. perhaps i would write him a lot less childish but otherwise it seems there are plenty of writers that get the guy. he is a decent, truly kind man from kansas, who was well raised by a loving family and who grew up in a stable enviroment surrounded by friends. probably one of the healthiest persons out there, also one of the most resilient, in more ways than one. a guy who is willing to lend his surplus of strength, both physical and personal for the sake of others since he understands not everyone can handle things all on their own and so he is happy to help wherever he can.

he is perhaps a little corny, a little too straight laced, almost to the point of coming off as naive. if you didnt know him well you'd think he is just a boring goodie two shoes boy scout, but once you get to know him you realize he is just disarmingly earnest and sincere in all he does. he is such a dad, too. he makes bad jokes and gets overly excited for big sales and wears shorts with socks and sandals and he insist that you get horrible matching sweaters on christmas. his clak kent persona is not a mask, he is genuenly a dork. also he is a true journalist, he actually cares a lot about his job at the daily planet and takes super seriously whenever he has to do investigative journalism or an interview of a high profile figure.

i dont think he hates lex luthor, he is just really frustrated that a man that brilliant would waste his gift in such petty sillyness. his biggest flaw is that he can be overcome by self doubts, maybe its is wrong that he shoud be having all this power, maybe he is becoming too authoritarian by trying to fix all the worlds problems, how does he know what the most responsible way to use his powers is? is it his right to interfere in affairs of humanity when he is technically an alien? oh god maybe luthor has a point, maybe he shouldnt be here, he doesnt know what he is doing! he is just a farmer from kansas!

his ultimate mission, his overall, overarching goal, would be to take lex luthor down, the main source of most villainy and evil happening in metropolis. but he insists on doing it the right way, getting proper evidence, writing actual news articles, showing through all legitimate channels that lex is a crook and a criminal, which is the reason it takes so long. of course he could capture luthor in ten seconds flat but then he would have to deal with attacking a private citizen, with the criminal system, with the trials and with the terrible hit that it would signify for superman's reputation.

he thinks bruce needs to relax a little, and honestly the whole bat thing is a little silly. but also he deeply profoundly respects the fact that bruce is doing all of it on his own, no kriptonian powers gifted from on high, and he genuenly thinks of him as a true friend. he sometimes even feels a little inadecuate next to bruce because bruce is obviously the smarter of the two and the guy who always seems to be most in control of the situation and who always has a plan, making clark feel like he is just making it up as he goes along and he is just wasting his time picking cats from trees and stopping petty theft.

as for diana he is downright intimidated by her and he is a bit put off by the fact that she is clearly way more comfortable with violence than the other two guys. but again, he can sense she has a kind heart and is also a true hero.

clark secretly feels like the lamest of the three because he is just a guy trying to help around and the other two are like parangons of righteousness and borderline demigods, he doesnt realize the other two basically idolize him.

batman.

he is a really intense dude.

again, im not interested in a batman that is too tortured. the batman from the 70's-80's hit a pretty good balance in my mind. he is still a person. a very obsessive, intense, dedicated and disciplined person but a person at the end of the day, none of that "there is only batman" nonesense here, at least not early on. yes he is a guy haunted by his demons and carrying a terrible turmoil on the inside, but he is generally good at keeping in check. this does manifest in issues on the long term though, on a macro level. on the way he keeps cycling robins, the way that as the years go by he never seems to be able to move on to something better and specially in the way that he ends up by the end of it all. batman of the future did this perfectly, a bitter lonely old man who pushed most people away.

but on a day to day basis, on a mission to mission rythm, he is well adjusted. he is a team player, he doesnt push his sidekicks or collaborators too far (but he does go out of his way to carry most of the weight of the mission, which makes many of his robins think he underestimates them or doesnt take them seriously, when in reality he is just trying to protect them) he knows how to dial down the whole dark knight persona when dealing with civilians, he keeps his strength firmly in check so as to never unnecesarily brutalize the criminals he fights against. he puts way more priority in stealth and trickery than face to face confrontations.

he is stoic and he is overtly serious and formal, but when its just him and clark and diana he does allow himself to make more casual commentary or maybe ever crack and incredibly wry, dry as pavement joke. whilst around most civilians he comes off as intense and brooding clark and diana can tell he is just a little awkward (and possibly autistic?) and his rigid behavior is just a shield he uses.

bruce wayne is just him masking, we all know his playboy millionaire persona and im not going to go too deep into that. he can be "normal", he can relax when he is at the manor with alphred and dick or todd or tim or damian. he is generally a quiet guy, very introspective. very ocassionally he will let out his more impish side (there is still inside of him a child who never got a chance to be a child) he is an adult who chose to dress up as a bat and build himself a bat cave and a batmobil. he is a little whimsical, and he will pull little pranks on robin or alphred or whatever. but when the cowl is on he is back to strictly bussiness

he doesnt hate the joker, honestly he has bigger problems in his plate, but he does find him incredibly annoying and aggravating, that someone would cause so much evil for basically no reason. his biggest flaw is that he can be a bit too cold and calculating and he has a tendency to be self destructive in how he insists carrying all the problems of the world and push himself too far

his overall cause would be to try and fix the fundamental rot in gotham that is making it so that it keeps producing nothing but corrupt politicians, brutal cops and deranged lunatics, where any attempt at reform or to inject money into the system to fix things keeps getting absorbed and redirected into the city's criminal underbelly. batman is there as a shock to the system, trying to surgically unclog and fix a broken machine so that the actual proper channels and institutions start doing their goddamn job and set the city on a better path. honestly the colorful supervillains are almost a distraction of his day to day work, they are just the symptoms of a deeper problem and not the disease he is desperatly trying to cure.

he doesnt for even a second think that clark is lame or naive or silly. bruce almost idolizes clark because he sees in him a shining resplandescent example of a healthy, kind, pure good man, something bruce is convinced he could never be due to his "inner darkness" (this is just bruce being silly). to bruce superman is what a hero should be and batman is what he has no option but to become since he is only a man. in time he will come to see clark as a person rather than an idol in a pedestal and finally as the one friend he can truly trust on and even be vulnerable around.

diana he also deeply respects because he sees in her a disciplined warrior ready to do whatever needs to be done in the name of justice. and again, his more whimsical side cant help but find it a bit cool that she is a true mythological figure who came from a mystical lost island. whever he is on a mission he feels she is the only person who speaks his language, except when they butt heads over her wanting to confront a problem head on and him trying to do more sneaky meanuvers.

wonder woman.

she is a woman of the world.

in my head she would be the most cosmopolitan of the trio, also she can be a bit of and outsider given that bruce and clark are ultimatly americans and she is a foreigner from a wildly different culture. but she finds enough things in common with the other two that she can make it work out.

in my head she is primarily a warrior from a warrior culture. she is a paladin, righteous, devoted, and perhaps a little single minded. but she is not just a fighter, she comes from themyschira as a diplomat, she is after all a princess, she is adroit at politics, at diplomacy, at negotiation, although she does tend to prefer to negotiate mainly by projecting strength. she is above all things honorable. she makes oaths and she will give her life for those oaths.

she is also incredibly kind and warm. of the three she is the one that loves humanity and all of its children with the most warmth. whereas superman can come off as too nice and batman too correct she is the one that can be genuenly comforting when she needs to. she loves to learn and interact with new cultures, after all there is a whole world out there to explore. she speaks like 30 languages, is very well verse in world history and she is familiar with world politics. she has shaken the hand of multiple kings, queens and presidents. of the three she is the easiest to talk to, even if she does come off as a bit old fashioned at times.

but once again, she is a warrior. of the three she is the fastest to go to the sword and the one who has the least issues with killing if necessary. superman absolutely never does it unless its like a kaiju or an eldritch abomination or an army of robots. batman doesnt do it *directly* but he is not going to go too out of his way to stop a villain from getting hoisted by his own petard. diana will just do it, with her own hands if she has to. she doesnt take glee on it and she doesnt rush to do it but she wont hesitate either.

she can be a little brusque and a little strongheaded. once she makes a desition is incredibly hard to make her change her mind or slow down. batman has learn to work with it and try his best to make plans that accomodate that. clark will protest a little and then throw his arm in the air and follow her in whatever she decided has to be done.

her overall mission is of a larger scope than the other two. again, she is a woman of themischyra but more than that she is a woman of the world. the threats she faces, gods, demigods and other mythological beings, tend to operate on a world stage and so she is flying to multiple countries trying to contain the capricious whims of the gods and protect mortals from their dangerous games.

she barely sees her enemies as people. to be fair most of her enemies are manticores, minotaurs, plagues, or gods. but also when she comes across people like max lord she just sees evil that has to be vanquished and that is the end of it. her biggest flaw is that she has a tendency towards black and white thinking.

she is the tallest of the three, by like a full head. also the bulkiest. batman is musuclar but lean, fibrous, he puts emphasis on stealth and cleverness than raw strength. superman is muscular but in a very sculptural way. his big muscles are more a battery of the power he absorbs from our sun. his strength doesnt come from how big his muscles actually are. diana is a tank, she has a big frame and is built like a lumberjack. she is not perfectly cut and shredded, she has body fat, she is beefy.

she sees clack as basically a god since is the primary frame of reference that she has for someone whit the kinds of powers he has. she doesnt have the highest opinion of gods given her greek upbringing, so she sees clark a bit as "one of the good ones". she finds his boy scout routine adorable and his refusal to kill a little childish, and sometimes she is a little patronizing with him, but ultimatly she loves him like a brother. she's so proud of him.

she sort of doesnt know what to make of bruce. he is obviously a formidable warrior, and for a mortal man, the things he can do are truly impressive, also he lives by a code of honor and has a higher calling, and she respects that a lot, but sometimes she doesnt get why he wastes so much time sneaking around and playing with his little toys. that is not the way a warrior is supposed to fight. but, well, he does get results, so ultimatly she trusts him

***

at the end of the day, they are friends. maybe coworkers at first but after a few years of putting their lives on the line for each other they have true loyalty. driven closer for their work but also for the fact that they are truly at the top of the hero game and it can be pretty lonely at the top and sometimes all they have is each other.

#dc #superhero #comic #superman #batman #wonder woman

5 notes · View notes

300iqprower · 2 years

Note

There are so many other pantheons that don't get proper treatment in fate. Where's fucking Susano'o? Where's Tezca? Where's Set for the egyptian gods? How does a game manage to put avatars of Ra and Horus in the same room but no Set and Isis avatars. Where TF is Xolotl. Where are all of the more interesting gods. Greek gods have been used to death in just about every series. Give us some variety.

there is....so much I could say, so much I could gush about in regards to so many gods and how much potential their interactions in FGO would have. Especially since as I showed in that Prelude I literally have Set as a major character in my grail war fic. (and my friend has his favorite OC in a persona fic use Xolotl!) But I honestly can't say anything about FGO's handling of this that I haven't before, it's all literally as simple as "The creator likes the Greek gods the most so those are the only ones that get fully represented" Just another one of the fundamental issues with the series, really. Or once again rather just FGO specifically.

When it's something like Stay Night, Apocrypha, Zero, etc etc etc, where it's a single contained story, you don't need to represent everything; it'd be downright unreasonable to expect that. Even with how FGO started we can't really expect that.

But at this point, it's so much larger in scale. Part 1 to a certain degree for sure since it boils down to all of collective history vs a seemingly impossible to avoid future. But then on top of that Part 2 really REALLY kickstarted a level of expansion of the franchise in both the scale of its plot and of its roster. There are like upwards of 350 characters at this point just in terms of who we can summon in game. When you have a roster that big but dont even spare a second proper member of an entire pantheon, that's not an issue of "we cant fit it all in there" that's an issue of you not trying to represent it all. And as someone neck deep in historical fiction I get how hard it is to balance it out when you're always going to have some overlap in favorites! But when it's THIS centralized, which FGO definitely is when it comes to west-European and Japanese figures for humanity, and Graeco-Roman for divine beings, it inherently undermines the entire concept.

honestly there's some truly problematic stuff I could go into about this but really dont want to especially when i'm almost certain it's unintentional undertones rather than active malice. Especially when instead I can circle back to what I said at the start:

Firstly, while it's a shit game you should absolutely look to Smite if you want to see what properly spread out pantheon representation looks like. Secondly: I'm just going to give a list of some figures I have in my writing either as an established character or at least conceptualized, and specifically those who I explicitly set out do something with because I feel like they have so much potential that isn't ever going to be explored in series like Fate or Record of Ragarok (A series that so far is overall more consistent in quality but still has a not as bad version of Fate's overly centralized representation). This wont even include ones that are well known yet rarely used (Thank christ for Red Pyramid otherwise I dont fcking know what I would do for quality portrayals of Set and Bast), just the ones that I think "I can't believe we always use the same handful of gods when all this exists". I’ll also even limit myself to one per pantheon.

Ah Muzen Cab (Mayan god of Bees and possibly the Apocalypse)

Nergal (Mesopotamian god of War, Disease, and the Twilight)

Artio (Celtic god of Bears)

Pele (Polynesian goddess of Volcanoes and Fire)

Baron Samedi (Haitian Vodun spirit of Life and Death)

Samael (Jewish angel of Death)

The Nidhoggr (Norse dragon trapped within the roots of Yggdrasil)

Yemoja (Yoruba mother-goddess of Water)

Arawn (Welsh god of Death and the Afterlife)

Xiuhtehcutli (Aztec creation deity and god of Fire)

Aži Dahāka (Zoroastrian embodiment of Sin)

Cikap-kamuy (Ainu god of Owls, Rituals, and Material Success)

Ba’al (Canaanite god of Storms and Kingship famously portrayed by Israelites as the “Lord of the Flies” Beelzebub)

And honestly I think i could include more like Czernobog (Slavic god of the Night) and Anansi (Akan trickster-god of Spiders and Storytelling) on the ground of "yeah they're referenced a good amount but it's very rarely an actual portrayal of them". Or how you have figures like Ravana who are VERY popular in their native country but literally nowhere else, or minor figures like Bakasura who something like (once again) Smite shows can be PLENTY interesting.

#my characters #writing shit #fgo #dont even get me started on the historical/humanity side #or do apparenlty I had an hour to waste making this post #because im systematic like that. Please help.#still upset I had my own version of Oberon but then Fate's came out and was actually good #mythology #never thought I’d get an ask

10 notes · View notes

tomorrowyoullbeworldsaway · 1 year

Text

I’ll break your fucking heart

It never should’ve been mine to break. Honestly with how smart everyone thinks you are you’d think you would know better than to do something stupid like fall in love. Everyone has a first love though, thank god I wasted mine on someone who couldn’t be bothered to keep it longer than a month. I kept yours for two years, hell I’ve still got it. I’m holding it gingerly in my hands, I’ve accepted it cant cradle it to my heart anymore. I think it was supposed to be something I didn’t have to hold, a heart that would join my own not sit stressfully in my hands filling me with dread at the knowledge that I cannot hold it forever and that it is far too high off the ground to be set down gently. When you’re heart comes careening down I can only hope it does not shatter, but even if it does I know you will learn to put it back together. I hate being this part of your life. I hate knowing I have to hurt you. I hate that I always knew your heart would get broken eventually. I hate that I regret ever dating you because I can’t handle the responsibility of ending things with you. I hate that so many of our friends think we’re so cute I hate that what I dread most about breaking your heart is that I’ll lose my unproblematic status in the eyes of all our friends I hate that no one tells you how high school relationships are supposed to end you just know they have to I hate that I have to tell my dad I broke up with you and it’s stupid and selfish but I hate that you’ll never break up with me and I have to do it and I feel like a horrible person for saying that I hate how it makes me look there’s no unproblematic way to break someone heart I just cannot be in this relationship anymore I hate the thought that I’ll grow to resent you if I don’t end things now I hate that I already am I hate to see myself grasping at the straws of you imperfections desperate for a way to justify to myself that you weren’t perfect we weren’t perfect I’m not breaking a perfect thing I’m not hurting an innocent person you have flaws just as much as I do and maybe one of them is that you love me. You love me in that near unconditional puppy love way that only an unbroken heart can I hate my own heart for being far too broken to love like that I hate that I can’t enter a relationship without thinking about the end but I promised myself sometime over two years ago that I wouldn’t date if I couldn’t end things so here I am honoring that. I hope you and your friends who are steadily losing overlap with my friends can be enough for eachother I hope you forgive me for being a pretty shit boyfriend I hope you never find out that I never could’ve loved you the way you love me I’m sorry that I don’t relate to you anymore im sorry that I’ll be lying when I end things and I say I love you because even though I know you should be loved I can’t bring myself to love you the way I always tried to and really hope I did at some point over the two years I spent wasting your time I hope the place I find in your life is a beautiful one im not sure if I hope you realize I was a terrible partner to you or that you come to love me for the role I played in your life it’s not up to me anyway im sorry that im going to string you along for another month I’ll really try my best to make you feel loved (but not too loved or I’ll make you feel blindsided when I end it) im sorry I can’t think of you when I listen to love songs like I say I do I swear I once did.

#Writing

1 note · View note

kanside · 1 year

Text

this is like a really narcissistic thought but like everyone keeps telling me that im actually rlly smart and have a lot of potential but i never take advantage of it but like .... dude i really just wing things. i dont know what 90% of my vocabulary means i just sorta guess and hope for the best and also i am incapable of focusing on anything properly!!!! so like jack of all trades master of none! i can follow instructions but also i cant, i can draw but like ehh i dont wanna improve, i can code but also like no not really i just copy others and make it better, i can do math but like you gotta guide me thru it cos when im right im insecure and when im wrong im confident LOL also i have the anxiety of .. um like .... okay i was gonna say bull because i saw a tiktok this morning of a male cow looking fucking insane and i was just thinking he looked anxious but really he was horny. i actually want to take care of cows (obvi the bulls would be meat i mean what other use, or is that animal cruelty) but like it sounds like a lot of work also i dont like seeing the process of living things turning food (its fine if they die just dont make me clean that up like id put a bullet in someones head if push comes to shove but im not gonna skin em and chop up all the tasty bits and fry up some bacon like no sirree not itnerested) and also it would be a lot of effort just milking them ALSO this morning i saw a calf get birthed on tiktok and like??? dude i dont wanna do that. why they lick their young. like i know youre just tryna help them its the wild and all that but 1. i dont wanna pull a wet juicy calf out of your va jay jay and 2. that thing is covered in goop STOP LICKING IT ill give it a bath or something.

if i look crazy i swear im not im just on my new adhd meds and the side effects are great n all (like i can focus well on stuff like work and its easier to handle my emotions - deffo still getting therapy cos meds only do 20% of the work) but there are side effects like first thing in the morning i find myself with an influx of hundreds of thoughts that need to be shared either verbally (in which i am incomprehensible because one thought overlaps another) or via text (which this blog is for!!! so i can post my silly little thoughts!!!)

speaking if which im rather pissed at the moment (see that the texts are getting broken up a nd furthrer organized that shows im chilling out) because i really enjoy playing the sims 4 (daily reminder that piracy is based but yeah i bought the base game dont sue me beause i dont have 700 dollars) but im in this annoying little middle ground where i like playing the sims 4 unmodded but it feels lacking and when i play it modded it feels overwhelming!! and like im trying to mix and match some mods i have but theres always the frustration that its just not basegame!

anyways im gonna go do something, im very tired, coming down from the ramble sesh, bye bye

#ramble

0 notes

northern-passage · 3 years

Note

I hope you dont mind the several question imma bout to hurl your way - i was wondering (since its mentioned in game that the relationship between the hunter and Lea is at its lowest point), how it all started out? As in, how was their working relationship when they first got paired up? I know that this would be dependent on the hunter themselves, also, if its going to be explored in the game, feel free to ignore the question lmao

2nd question - how exactly does the hunters knife look? I know its been described in game, but I was wondering if the hilt is simply wrapped in white leather? Is it bone, or perhaps a white wood? And the blade itself - more metallic or crystalline? Cant lie, a crystal, blue gradient knife would be dope. I'm also curious about the shape. Just regular knife? More daggerlike, with a double edge? A BUTCHERS KNIFE?!?

Sorry for the long ask, and i hope you have a great weekend 😀✌️

the two would have started pretty distant, i imagine - in general the hunter was a bit isolated even during their apprenticeship just because there's not a lot of people at the stronghold. they would have been acquaintances, and their apprenticeships would have overlapped quite a bit, though lea was with shoshana first for some time while the hunter was still training and preparing for their initiation. and with lea being a handler and focusing on alchemy, they spent a lot more time in a kind of... classroom setting, with combat being a secondary thing, as opposed to the hunter.

a few things happened with lea that we'll learn about in the story before they partnered up with you, that would have made them pretty reserved and even a bit mean at the beginning. i imagine it was a very... two co-workers just doing their jobs vibe, with lea sometimes being a bit bossy.... which then leads into their current relationship in game.

as for the hunter's knife, i don't really have an exact visual for it besides the colors. i have kind of just imagined it as a giant bowie knife lmao. but i also love how retconomics drew their hunter's knife here. to be honest i imagine they all look slightly different for each hunter because it's part of their initiation, is helping craft their knife, and i've said before i think they would be personalized with carving along the handle, things like that. we will learn more about it in the story. the handle is white and made of bone (though is probably also wrapped in white leather or birch due to the cold weather), while the blade is a kind of iridescent dark blue metal which we will also learn more about very soon!

#lore #ask #anonymous

51 notes · View notes

failedintsave · 3 years

Text

I tried the MTL pairing generator for rarepair month...aaaand it told me to stay in my lane lol. And then it told me to write some Rachel/Roy Cornickleson which I just don't think I'm ready to take on 🙃 So here's some Skwistok set just before Doomstar that I've been fiddling with.

(gets just a little nsfw near the beginning)

Stages

Everyone handles grief differently.

Skwisgaar groaned as muscular arms pushed him against the wall, the reinforced metal door to his room on the submarine banging shut as they cleared the threshold. Hands tangled in his hair, holding him in place while lips and tongue and teeth worked over his neck. He clung desperately to the body pressed against him, fingers twisting in blue cotton material and yanking it upward. The mouth latched onto his throat pulled away as the t-shirt was hauled over his head and Toki's fevered eyes found his before rushing forward again, mashing their lips together with sloppy abandon. He gripped Skwisgaar by the belt, half dragging him as they stumbled their way to his bunk and collapsed. Breathing came in gasps and sighs as Toki's weight pinned him down into the mattress, the pressure both exhilarating and mollifying, an anchor to hold onto as the life he'd known for so many years turned upside down and twisted away in the wind.

He'd never given much energy to grief. Life was just a punctuated string of losses in the long run. Loss of innocence, loss of trust, loss of opportunities. It was all meaningless, really. In his experience, something new always came along to fill the space so why dwell on mourning what you couldn't have back?

Boots thumped to the floor, kicked off in haste. His shirt was peeled away before sturdy hands lifted his hips to free him of his jeans, calloused fingertips gliding back up his thighs and making him shiver. Toki climbed up to kiss him again, hungrily, as if trying to swallow him whole, their teeth knocking against each other. Skwisgaar ran his hands over every inch of skin he could reach, the hard lines of Toki's shoulders, the raised ridges of overlapping scars on his back, hip bones where they ground down against his own. Heat pooled low in his belly like magma aching to erupt. He wanted this, needed this right now, more than he'd ever needed anything in his life. How long had they danced around this, stealing moments and blaming it later on booze or post-show adrenaline, walking right up to the line and peeking over before backing away again? In the name of preserving band dynamics? A lot of good that had done, they'd still ended up where they are now, Dethklok tipping over the precipice into self-destruction.

Another loss to add to the list.

Toki pulled back, glacier blue eyes raking over Skwisgaar's features with manic light, chestnut locks of hair falling in disarray to frame his face. Skwisgaar reached up and tucked a strand behind his ear and Toki's expression shifted, the wild yearning softened into something gentler, less wolfish. He sat up to kneel between Skwisgaar's legs, hand skimming from his collar bone to his navel and leaving a trail of fire, over the inside of his thigh and dipping beneath, pausing until Skwisgaar breathed his assent, whispered his name.

Fingers tested gingerly, gradually increasing in depth and pressure before he gripped him by the waist and hauled him onto his lap. Skwisgaar canted his hips, lip catching between his teeth at the feel of Toki against him, his pulse hammering in his ears. His head angled back into the pillows and a wordless moan escaped his throat when Toki eased forward, back arching as lightning raced up his spine. Skwisgaar's fingers knotted in the bed sheets as Toki released a shuddering breath over him, rocking into him slowly, building rhythm into a steady push and pull.

Loss of professional boundaries. Definitely not something to be mourned.

The devastating sensation of fullness where they joined drove all coherent thought from Skwisgaar's mind and his eyes rolled back under closed lids, panting nonsense and expletives, begging for release. His toes curled as Toki matched stokes with his hand to the tempo of his thrusts, coaxing him through his climax until tipping over the edge after him with a whining sigh. Call and response, Skwisgaar thought dazedly as his superheated skeleton melted into jelly. When he could open his eyes again, his gaze landed on Toki's face above him, watching him with an openly heartsick expression.

"I… hads to do dat… at least once before dis ams all over." The broken whisper settled over him like a burial shroud.

Skwisgaar shook his head, holding out his arms. "Come heres."

Swallowing thickly, Toki obeyed, winding his arms under Skwisgaar's shoulders and burying his face in the crook of his neck. Skwisgaar shifted to find a comfortable position, their sweat-slick chests sliding against each other as he angled slightly onto one side, hand cradling Toki's skull to keep him near.

"Seem pretties stupids we aments been doing dat dis whole time, honestlies."

Loss of time.

Toki held him tightly and Skwisgaar felt the tremor in his grip. He rubbed his cheek against the crown of the other man's head, humming tunelessly as he waited for him to speak, knowing already the fears plaguing his mind. He'd faced them often enough in his younger days, even if the scenario now was more complicated. It was hard to compare wondering where your next gig, your next meal ticket, might come from to wondering where to go after you'd already stood at the top.

Sniffling preceded the feeling of wetness against his shoulder, Toki mumbling against his skin. "What happens now? Ams we all just gonna says 'fucks you, see ya laters' now dat de band ams done? Even now dat dey tells us we gots to plays music to saves de world?"

Skwisgaar fiddled with a strand of brown hair for a moment before answering. "Well, I don'ts know abouts all dis saves-de-woirld business. But whats I do know ams band break ups. And, euughh, ja dat ams a pretty standords opseratings procedures."

"But does it has to be likes dat? We coulds all stays pals, right?"

"Dat ams...compslickateds." He dropped the lock and let his hand fall to Toki's shoulders. "Somet'ing like dis...people tends to ezpecks yous to euughh, picks sides. It ams messy. And it never warks out, t'ings always comes apart in de end."

Loss of the longest working relationships he'd had in his life.

Toki said nothing, so Skwisgaar continued if only to fill the silence. "But it coulds be worse, you knows? We gots more moneys den god, what's so bad what cants be fixed wif dat?" The statement produced a cold feeling trickling down behind his ribs, like swallowing a heaping spoonful of snow. "Nones of it acktualies matters. Just goes on to da next t'ings."

"I just... don'ts know what to does if dere aments a Dethklok."

"Whatevors you wants! You coulds buy de whole stores of airplane models, or you coulds builds you own splasharoonies water parks. Hell you coulds probablies starts a new bands wif dose guys from dat T'underhorse group."

"No," Toki murmured, face still compressed against Skwisgaar's neck. "I don't wants a new band. Dis was da one."

The possessive satisfaction he felt at those words tied his stomach in guilty knots.

"Ja it ams was a pretty good gigs…"

Toki shifted, laying his head on the pillow next to Skwisgaar's, his forlorn gaze searching his face for answers. Skwisgaar rolled so they were laying face to face, legs still twisted under the sheets.

Not everything was tied up in the feud that caused the band to split. What if it didn't have to be a total loss? Surely there were parts here that could be salvaged.

"Okej...so who says we haves to do anyt'ings at all?"

Toki's brows cinched. "What you means?"

Maybe, just this one thing, he could keep.

Skwisgaar's lips curved with the ghost of a smile. "I's already mades it to de top, ams de fastest guitarist alives...coulds be I shoulds just quits while I gots de title, ja? Retires, takes my ball and goes home wif it."

Toki snorted and rolled his eyes.

"Builds mineself a giant house up in de mountains or somet'ing. Or travels and just fucks off on de resgiduals forever, not worries about a deadlines or demos ever again. Plays guitar just for funs."

He saw his grin mirrored on Toki's face as the other man nodded dreamily.

"Maybe you...comes wif me?" Fluttery nerves tickled behind his sternum. "If you wants to."

Toki's eyes widened. "Wait. Whats?"

Just this. He could be happy with this.

"Y-you means it? You aments just messings with Toki?"

He shook his head. "How long dids we waste before nows? For not'ing. I'm sick ofs waitings. Let's just goes."

A heartbeat passed, and then Toki's mouth was on his again. Less frantic this time, hopeful rather than desperate. He cradled Toki's jaw, taking his time as he returned his affections, deepening the kiss and tracing languid strokes over his neck, his shoulders, his chest. Their limbs wound together in a twisted bramble, bodies drawing tightly together, fitting like puzzle pieces.

A repetitive, discordant riff sounded from the pile of clothes abandoned on the floor and Toki's head jerked away. Flashing an apologetic grin, he rolled away to fish his phone from his pocket, sliding his pants up loosely around his hips.

"Sorries, be rights back!" He whispered, pressing the screen to answer. "Oh hei, Rockso!*

"Hows do you even has signals down here?" Skwisgaar called after him as he stepped into the hall, then flopped back onto the pillows to stare at the ceiling, counting the shiny rivets in the metal plating.

This was doable. Tomorrow they would bury more than just a mentor, they would lay to rest their careers as the biggest metal band in existence. The world at large would mourn their passing, but Skwisgaar wouldn't dwell on what's done and over. Not if he had new prospects to look forward to. Something always came along, and he never looked back.

"I tolds Magnus dat I woulds sit wif hims tomorrow." He heard Toki's muffled voice through the crack he'd left in the door.

A shadow passed over his thoughts at the name, like someone walking across his grave. It was uncomfortable to say the least, to have their former guitarist back in the fringes of their lives. Toki had a habit of finding friendship in questionable places, but where the clown was mostly an annoyance and sometimes a financial drain, his relationship with Magnus left Skwisgaar apprehensive. It didn't ease his mind when Toki insisted the older musician was different now. How could he know? He hadn't lived with the man, hadn't walked on eggshells during every rehearsal or songwriting session, hadn't watched as he plunged a knife into a bandmate.

But Magnus had also saved Toki with his insulin. He'd been there for Toki as a shoulder to lean on when the band had started to fall apart, too preoccupied with their own issues to spare a minute for their youngest member.

So maybe Toki was right. Things change; he'd never expected that a wedge could be driven between Nathan and Pickles far enough to end their friendship in such a catastrophic way, but here they were. And if Magnus still harbored any resentment for the band, their breakup was probably a balm to the old wound of rejection. What else could he wish on them? He was probably loving this.

The door scraped shut and Toki slipped back into the blankets gingerly, as if expecting Skwisgaar to be asleep. When he saw that he was still awake, Toki leaned in with a grin.

"Sorries...now, where was we…?" He murmured, capturing Skwisgaar's lips tenderly. "Oh ja, you was tellings me how we's gonna runs away togedders into de sunsets."

"Pfff. Dat am hardlies what I saids."

More kisses peppered his cheek and jaw. "Dats what I heards."

"Well I always knew yous was tone deafs, I didn'ts realize you ams just all de way hards of hearingks." His arm encircled Toki's back as the brunette nestled in again.

"Tells to me about wheres we gonna goes. Tells me about our house on tops of de mountains."

Skwisgaar snorted. Of the two of them, his was not the more vivid and fanciful imagination. But staring up at the blank canvas that the brushed metal panels of ceiling created, he envisioned a future for them to share. They squabbled playfully over locations and home design styles. They named off outlandish things they would fill their home with, like an even bigger ruby metronome or a trampoline room or an indoor pool shaped like a guitar and filled with champagne. They listed places they'd toured that they wanted to visit again, and locations they hadn't been yet but had always hoped to see.

"Can we gets a cat?" Toki asked suddenly, making Skwisgaar laugh airily.

"If we haves to?" He laughed again as Toki nodded against him. "But I'm not cleaningks up after it, dat ams all you, pal."

"Okei." Toki sighed deeply, settling in more comfortably. "Okei. I feels a lots less scareds now about all dis."

His hand glided up from where it had been resting at Skwisgaar's hip to lay warm over his heartbeat.

"I'll miss Dethklok. A whole lots. But now I t'inks I ams acktualies looking forwards to what comes next."

Still staring at the steel plates above, Skwisgaar grinned at the pictures they'd painted in his mind.

"Ja, me toos."

He covered Toki's hand with his own. However much they stood to lose after tomorrow, his heart felt lighter at what they were about to gain together. There was no reason to dwell on what was gone.

Everyone handles grief differently.

Laying on his bunk, Skwisgaar's eyes roamed the scuffed plate ceiling overhead, lingering on rusted rivets and water stains. The imperfections seemed to move and writhe like crawling insects under the influence of whatever handful of pills Pickles had given him. A half-drained bottle of vodka lay cradled against his chest, the mouth stoppered by his thumb. Fire burned in his belly from the alcohol, but cold fury pulsing through his veins tempered it.

He'd been prepared for Dethklok to end, had even accepted the idea that his career as a guitarist was over, diminished to a hobby. Playing guitar was his lifeblood, his purpose, and he'd been about to let that go. What had he been thinking? How had he gotten so wrapped up in fantasy that throwing away his entire self had seemed like a plausible course of action.

Loss of objectivity. Fortunately it seemed to be temporary.

He took a long pull from the bottle, dribbling a little and not bothering to wipe it away. Stupid Toki, needing to be comforted like a child with make-believe bedtime stories. He couldn't just man up and move on like everyone else, like Skwisgaar had been doing since he was a teen, finding his next audition, his next couch to crash on, his next temporary alliance with subpar musicians to make ends meet. It couldn't have been an easier landing for him either, no concerns about hunger or homelessness or deportation hanging over his head. He was set up for success and still couldn't handle it.

Fucking idiot needed so much attention, so much coddling, he'd even run straight into harm's way to try and make a friend. Of all people, he'd had to choose Magnus, that vindictive bastard. Of course he'd still been carrying a grudge, when had he ever let anything go in the past? And they'd known it.

A pair of divots on the ceiling stared back at him, one dark, one catching the light. Glaring back at him mockingly, winking at his impotent rage.

They'd known. They'd known, they knew, they knew.

Skwisgaar knew. And he'd said nothing.

Then he'd watched again, frozen, as Magnus drove a knife into someone close to him.

Skwisgaar thrashed upright, a strangled roar bursting from his lungs as he flung the bottle at the wall. He kicked at the bedside table bolted to the wall, denting it from below, then spun around to tear the sheets from his bunk and hurl them across the room. This wasn't the trade he'd prepared for, this wasn't the deal he'd made with himself.

His eyes fell on his Explorer propped in the corner. He reached for it, wrapping both hands around the ebony fretboard, holding it like an axe and swinging it against the wall. He bashed it into the floor, the dresser, screaming until his throat was raw and the guitar was cracked into useless chunks of wood and fiberglass connected by twisted strings. He dropped the pieces in a heap, sinking to the ground to lean against the side of his bed, his shoulders heaving with labored panting.

The door of his room scraped open, and in his periphery he saw a figure standing, backlit by the dim red glow in the corridor. Broad-shouldered, straight hair dangling about their head. His heart seized for a moment before the figure spoke, shattering his hallucination.

"What are you doing in here?" Nathan's gravelly voice was cautious.

Skwisgaar didn't turn, eyes still focused on the debris ahead of him. The stainless steel guitar strings seemed to wriggle like worms in grave soil, consuming the corpse of his instrument. He waited until he caught his breath before trying to respond.

"What does it looks like I'm doingks?"

Nathan shifted in the doorway. "Losing your mind."

He chuckled mirthlessly.

Loss of sanity? Maybe.

"You've been locked up in there a while. Maybe you should, you know. Come out here. With the rest of the band."

"Fucks off."

Nathan didn't move. Skwisgaar felt the urge to rage at the other man rise in him, to shout in his face, demand to know why it had taken him so long to patch things over with Pickles, why he let it go so far that he'd upset all of their lives so horrifically. But the feeling passed, his body drained from his previous outburst and from trying to filter a pharmacy's worth of substances through his liver.

"We're gonna find him, you know. Charles has people everywhere looking already."

One shoulder rose and fell in a halfhearted shrug. "Whatevers. Who cares."

They could have been a four-piece. If he really wanted to rage at someone it would be his past self. How different would things be right now if he'd never given that gutter rat a chance after missing his audition time? How much of what they achieved would they have really missed out on? How many rerecording sessions and stupid arguments and publicized blow outs could have been avoided? What would they really have been missing?

He certainly wouldn't mourn the loss of a constant source of annoyance. Of an immature tag-along with a hair trigger temper. Of a loud and boisterous whirlwind of silliness and color and sincerity.

Loss of his shadow. Loss of his muse. Loss of his best friend. Loss of his future. Loss of…

Loss of…

He couldn't breathe.

"Just leaves me alone. Please." He gritted out, proud of the steadiness of his voice as his stomach began to roil and his eyes prickled with tears.

Nathan hesitated. "Should I...close this?"

Skwisgaar nodded and after another moment the steel frame clanged shut. His vision blurred as tears welled and spilled over, his breath returning in short gasping puffs which rolled over into sobs that rattled his frame.

They'd had one day. Not even a day. An evening. Hours.

He wept until he was sick, vomiting clear liquor and not much else onto the floor next to the remnants of his guitar. He wept until his tears were spent and his head throbbed in tandem with his heart, even though he didn't understand how the muscle still carried a beat when the rhythm had been taken away.

Eventually he had nothing left. His face felt swollen, his eyes were gritty. Skwisgaar rolled to his hands and knees, avoiding the puddle of sick as he rocked up onto wobbly legs. He looked at the door, wondering if the others were still awake. If they were sitting in the lounge, drowning their sorrows. He felt like he wore a lead weight around his neck, bowing under the pull of it. It might be better just to sleep.

He turned to the naked mattress, but a scrap of blue on the floor near the foot of the bed caught his attention. A faded cotton t-shirt lay where it had been discarded. Skwisgaar stared at it for several long moments. He stepped closer to the bed, to the shirt.

And kicked it underneath the frame and out of sight before turning for the door.

He'd never given much energy to grief. Life was just a punctuated string of losses in the long run. Loss of purpose. Loss of self. Loss of connection. Loss of…

It was all meaningless, really. So why dwell on mourning what you couldn't have back?

#skwisgaar skwigelf #toki wartooth #skwistok #dethklok #metalocalypse

30 notes · View notes

ghostiiiee · 3 years

Text

Everything at Once

Idk what im doing but I will put a Trigger warning here before anything. I wrote this to be just after the accident. There is a slight bit of panic attack in here. Its not explicitly mentioned as a panic attack but it is sensory over load paired with it so its Not Fun. Also its been YEARS since i last wrote anything so please have mercy.

His parents had taken him in to the hospital as soon as they had gotten home. He had been unconscious at the time, waking up in the hospital bed hadn’t been pleasant. It sadly wasn’t the first time that has happened to him though. He never had the best luck.

Upon waking up the first thing he noticed was how jarringly loud it was.

The beeping felt like ringing in his ears. He could hear so many voices, overlapping, speaking in hushed voices outside his door. Sounds of shoes clacking against the ground. His own breathing sounded harsh and ragged. He heard a loud, slow thumping. And nearly drowned out by it all. A quiet buzz, that reminded him of a electricy. The sounds weren’t the only thing that was overwhelming. The sheets- which he was normally perfectly fine with why are they so scratchy and uncomfortable? The walls had such strange patterns to them. The entire room looked wrong. Its never looked like this before why does it look weird.

It wasn’t until he looked down at his hands did everything come crashing in.

His left hand had a raw, burring red mark going all the way up his arm. It branched out everywhere like lightning- why does it almost look like its glowing. its glowing green. HOly shit its glowing- He felt his breathing pick up. He heard the beeping get louder and faster. The voices outside stopped talking. He couldn’t pay attention to what happened. He knew they came in to the room, he knew they went to talk to him- why were they talking to him? Why are they so loud? One seemed to notice him flinch at the sounds and lowered their voice. He never caught what they was saying. Their tone was nice. His world got blurry.

~~~~

A week had passed since the accident. Or was it two? he wasn’t entirely sure. He didn’t leave his room for much. Jazz brought him food, and so did Sam and Tucker.

He didn’t like how loud everything was around the house. He never noticed - or maybe he did- how loud that his dad was. He know he never noticed how everything seemed to make noise. All the electronics buzzed. The lights, the fridge, the computers, the tv - everything. He liked to sit in his room with the lights off. They don’t buzz if they’re off.

~~~~

The next few days were better and then much more akward.

Sam and Tucker dropped off some headphones that canceled out sound. He felt... much better wearing them. It was still loud but not as bad. However, they couldn’t help everything else that was coming up.

“I think I’m really strong.” Danny hugged his knees close.

“Are you sure that’s not just puberty-?” Sam elbowed Tucker.

“What makes you think that.”

Silently Danny slid off his bed and with ease- lifted it one handed. Bed Frame and all, with his two friends sitting on it. “Tada.”

“...Oh.”

~~~~

Almost full month had passed since the accident.

School had started the week before. And he was already banned from handling all glassware in the school. Breaking most of the science labs extra beakers on accident does that.

During lunch, he sat with his friends. Tucker had mentioned earlier that day wanting to show him something. (Danny was just glad that today seemed more normal than yesterdays arguments between Sam and Tucker. Who knew that they’d get all riled up about the lunch menu?)

“Hey Danny, do you remember Iron man?”

“...well... yeah? what about him...?” He slowly sat at the table.

Tucker just gave him the biggest grin. “Well I was blessed with an amazing idea last night. And with the power of only two red bulls, I present my idea. You can be a super hero too.”

“You cant be serious.” He deadpanned.

“He is.”

“Just watch.” Tucker pulled his phone out and handed it to Danny. “Here.”

Upon pressing play, he was met with an older video of Tony Stark in his lab. Scratch that- several videos of Tony Stark in his lab. All of them were him failing use one of the first iterations of the Iron man gear. Danny felt a small, amused smile creep onto his face.

Iron man was a hero of his. He never even considered...

“So? What do you think?”

“Tuck. Thats funny and all. But he fights big time. He’s an avenger.” Danny sighed. “Besides, theres barely any crime here-”

A shudder went through Danny’s body. Like he had just walked into a freezer. When he exhaled, it came out in a mist. “...That only happens at home by the portal-”

“Excuse me, dearies? I heard someone was trying to change the menu?”

#Danny Phantom #phandom fic #tony stark is mentioned lol #this went on LONGER than i first thought oopsie

17 notes · View notes

ouyangzizhensdad · 3 years

Note

unpopular opinion: most of the mxtx critical discourse happens becouse people cant let go of their prejudes against bl genre

Somewhat agree? I know you used “most” so you already acknowledged that there are other factors at play, but I do think it’s important to consider that reactions like these generally do not have a single, easy answer.

While people tend to conflate danmei and BL, we can’t ignore that there have been larger discussions about how women *should* or *should not* engage or produce m/m content, in and out of fandoms, in ways that even people who haven’t drunk the anti-fujo kool-aid are inherently suspicious of “straight women” writing m/m stories (the Love, Simon controversy is an example of that where the author was forced out of the closet for the crime of writing a m/m story as a presumed straight woman). But danmei/bl being non-western, non-white genres certainly accentuate many of these tensions. Racism funnily both play into the patronising/otherising takes regarding how ‘terrible’ danmei-bl is compared to other m/m content, but also in the criticisms of westerners who engage in danmei-bl: ‘so you guys just want to fetishise asian men/asian gay men’.

As well, there’s been so much discussions about what *should* or *should not* been written when it comes more broadly to romance and sex, about what is problématique or not, the conclusion of which seems to lean toward the idea that any content that is not a safe, sane and consensual PSA or entirely wholesome simply should not exist. And that’s not even mentioning the sort of “psychologisation” or “trauma-turn” of these discussions, where people assume the psychological states of people who write or engage with problématique content, or propose that only people who have the right list of traumas can produce or engage with these types of content. And that hangs heavy not only in the mind of people who produce content but the person who consume it. If the only reason you could possibly want to engage with anything problématique would be that you are, in a way, deviant or broken, then perhaps you will start consciously avoiding these types of works or people who produce them. And all these relate to large discussions about how “””fiction impacts reality””” and discussions about social justice and consent, etc. etc. Once more, we have overlapping discourses and so, so much intertextuality.

And the thing is that, generally, it’s not like these discourses are “rotten to the core,” ie that there is not important conversations to be had about these topics or that real issues did not spark these conversations in the first place. However, many people tend to want to collapse these complex discussions with complex and sometimes contradicting conclusions into a single, convenient answer by going to the extreme. And we have to recognise that there is something rewarding about feeling like you’re in the right, especially when these discourses become moralised. The trade-off between giving up entirely on something for the reward of taking the moral high ground seems very appealing! And it’s a lot less difficult than to navigate on a case-by-case basis works of fiction or fandom discussions, or to figure how to like something you might also disagree with or question regarding certain aspects.

However, not only is it a vain effort, it is also denies art its capacity for meaning. It is vain because, well, the sources of the issues are unlikely to disappear and will probably only move onto a newer manifestation, and because humans be problematic 🤷‍♂️ and we be living in a society 🤷‍♂️. It doesn’t mean we should not be critical and have debates and conversations and expect better--but it means that this belief that the internet will be a good place if only we can squash fandom group X is just..... a fantasy. A comforting one, perhaps, but one all the same. I wouldn’t mind it as much if there wasn’t harassment and aggression resulting from these beliefs, and if it didn’t stifle art and creativity, the latter relating to an underlying assumption that there is nothing of worth in exploring in fiction difficult or shocking themes, or relationship dynamics that are not perfect or healthy. And that is just..... fundamentally misunderstanding the point of art and fiction.

As well, somewhat in relation to these discussions, it’s important I think to accept that a lot of people who engage with MDZS in bad faith do so after they have been exposed by takes demonising the work that they took at face-value. It takes a lot more energy, good faith, critical thinking, and good reading comprehension to end up finding arguments against a perception of a work that you already accepted as true before you read it. Especially since social media has made it so much more dependent on other people’s opinions to decide what we engage with, and in which manner we will, I don’t think it can be understated. If you have already been served an opinion, it is easier than having to form your own, and easier than challenging it. Especially if people frame that opinion as morally right, and the people who disagree with it as degenerate sickos. Wouldn’t want to side with the freaks!!!

Finally, MDZS is not a work of fiction that can be read on the surface, and is a work that likes to play with tropes in a manner than is not necessarily a complete and total subversion, things that make it easier for people to miss the point of many of its elements. It’s even harder considering the level of the available translation and the framing of said translation--and the fact that many of the readers are not part of the intended audience and lack many of the cultural or literary knowledge that would help them navigate the novel. And, let’s be honest, it’s easier to miss the mark at times when a writer decides to handle more complex and controversial topics. It’s not like I don’t think MXTX could have not done some things better.

22 notes · View notes

incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 4 years

Note

YO SEBAS’ ROUTE HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED FOR JP I CANT WAIT!!! Do you have any theories of what could happen in his route?!?

Haha, yes, I saw this morning! For those who haven’t yet seen the announcement, it has been said that Sebastian’s route will be coming to the JPN version of Ikevamp on August 25th! It’s very exciting news, and I can’t wait to get started translating after I finish Dazai’s.

Honestly I’m finding this so many degrees of hilarious because I was like “oh ya I’m curious” at first, but after seeing that character introduction video with the lil forehead kiss and the horny as all HELL biting, I’m SLAMMING the horny button holy shit??? (I have that card CG in the JPN ver of the game on my phone and. lord jesus. That scowl. WILL HE STEP ON ME ONEGAI AKIHIKO)

Putting the rest under a cut bc is long and has some JPN ver spoilers:

That being said, let’s address the second part of the ask, shall we? Theories! If I’m honest I’m not surprised Sebastian was next on the docket, but I do admit I’m thoroughly surprised by the CG of him biting MC in earnest--he visibly draws blood on her neck and shoulder. This raises so many questions that are likely to be reiterated endlessly until his rt comes out in full, the most pressing of which is: does Sebastian turn into a vampire? Or is he just really into sadistic foreplay?

If I’m honest I sincerely don’t know if he’s fully turned, only because I’m trying to sort out the information we do have. Why turn into a vampire if the goal is to be with MC, who is also human? If we follow this course of thought, it doesn’t seem to make much sense, does it?

But then our boi Sebas is different in terms of his internalized conflict when compared to the vampires. Granted I may turn out to be wrong about this, but I think the two focal points of his route will be as follows: insecurity and the pursuit of knowledge. Remember that the reason Sebastian (our dearest Akihiko Sato) agrees to Comte’s proposal at all is his insatiable curiosity. I mean just think about it. If Comte told all that stuff about the mansion to someone in modern times, they would probably just figure he was a crazy person and go on with their day. But Sebas, the absolute madlad, agreed; he wanted to see if it was true, and to learn everything he could about people who exhibit extraordinary talent.

I foresee that this, however, may become a double-edged sword. Curiosity killed the cat, as they say. What I mean to say is that it could be very possible he might turn or undergo something similar to the changing process in order to experience what it’s like firsthand (whether to prove he can handle it or because he wants to understand the residents better/gather info). Furthermore, while Sebastian is curious--with no malicious intent at all--this doesn’t mean that envy is impossible in this kind of scenario, either. Admiration and envy are like two sides of a coin; depending on how one interprets information, they can skew to self-consciousness or inspiration. Given the content I’ve seen for Sebastian so far (and man has it been limited as all heck) I often get the implication that he truly does feel inadequate in some ways compared to the other men. As soon as MC chooses him a kind of overwhelming awareness of his normalcy begins; the implication that he is the wrong or lesser choice. Knowing this, I truly wouldn’t be surprised if problems arise as a result of this self-effacing.

(Note: I don’t think that about Sebastian at all, personally! I think he’s very mindful of others and really astute--to say nothing of his skill when it comes to the domestic sphere. I don’t think just anybody could do what he does, and he sells himself far too short. I always think of how the men call him the Ninja Butler and praise how capable he is, how they freely admit the place wouldn’t be the same without him. Sometimes I wish Sebas could see that, though I understand his concerns as well ;-; I’m always torn bc I’ll be like “I understand but alSO N O”)

Besides those latent insecurities, time to expand more on the pursuit of knowledge. In one way this drive might feed his self-derision; he might believe that the more he is able to do and understand and study, the more he can be of use/help other people. (Put simply his value as a person = the increasing extent of his knowledge in an almost linear relationship; without it he is nothing). On the other hand, I think he just genuinely enjoys collecting information the way he does! He likes assessing all the different ways people behave and why, and how this contributes to how they think and who they are. More insight offers him more ways to preoccupy his endlessly moving mind, but it also offers proximity with the subject in question. This to me is absolutely key--I think so much of his studying the great men is linked to his admiration, his wish to be like them and/or his wish to be close to them.

I’d like to address a quick reference to the drinking event that recently released in the ENG version of the app, if only to expand on/clarify where this is coming from. It essentially featured Sebastian and Napoleon sharing a drink together at a bar and in it, Sebastian speaks to the way that he encountered Napoleon in his life, and the reason why he grew so fond of him. He speaks to a childhood entirely detached from the people of his own time, roving through the shelves of libraries, reading endlessly to fill that void. It was a quote by Napoleon that caught his eye and inspired him, and ostensibly the words of people long past that gave him the strength to keep moving forward. This information, coupled with his strange excitement in Isaac’s rt introduction about how Isaac used to throw hands with people who mocked him seems to bring to the forefront a few things for me.

Sebastian is highly, highly individualistic: he doesn’t seem to care much about what is conventional or normal, only in what brings him joy and makes others comfortable/happy. His life is highly internal, but I sense no anti-sociality in this removal from societal expectations. He just lives his own way and tries not to trouble anyone. (This is also highly notable in his acute impatience with Dazai’s shenanigans/ineptitudes now and again; while he doesn’t always scold or explode, he shows a sharp and surprising impatience with willful/harmful/irresponsible behavior.) He’s tactful and measured, but highly excitable under the right circumstances. He also doesn’t seem to think much of his own life re: self-derision. Think Leonardo’s rt ending: he insists that the serial killer focus on him and not on MC, he tells her he has no qualms with dying if it means she’ll make it out alive. MC has to be the one to tell him to think more of his own life. As such I wouldn’t put it past him to have enough nerdy reckless energy to test the waters of being a vampire (all the better if it helps him understand the great men).

Comte once said it in an event story a few months ago, but I think he really hit the nail on the head in some respects. He says something to the effect of “His curiosity is admirable, but please Sebastian--some things are to remain private.” Sebastian doesn’t intend to be intrusive or malicious, he just likes knowing things for the sake of knowing. It’s about the cones answering his nerdy desire to piece things together, not stepping on people’s toes. (It’s nice too because Comte seems to understand this and doesn’t see it as a shortcoming/nuisance, he just tries to nudge Sebas in a different direction if he starts prying too close to people’s personal business ;-; pls pardon the Comte love I just can’t help myself)

Enter Johann Georg Faust.

Now then we know very little about the reserved priest doctor, but there are tidbits of information that we can work with (or at the very least, stand out to me a lot). The one I would like to focus on for this explanation is the little blurb that appears when you open the Ikevamp app and it’s loading, providing something like trivia facts for each character. In the ENG app we got those early, but we don’t have the ones for our antagonists. Iirc, Faust’s reads something to the effect of “will often sneak substances into their (as in the castle residents Vlad and Charles’) food to test the effect of his concoctions on vampires.” There have been hints that Faust is to be our mad scientist of sorts; that he is experimenting under Vlad’s orders to find a reliable way to transform a human being into an immortal equivalent to that of a pureblood. But I have mentioned on more than one occasion that I really don’t think Faust is only doing all of this for Vlad. He has his own curiosity that is seeking to be alleviated, perhaps he is satisfied with having another puzzle dumped in his lap--a means to distract himself and exhaust his faculties.

(One has to wonder if Vlad turned them under the same principle of desperation, and if that were the case, what Faust and Charles might desire more than anything else...Is Faust operating on a kind of necessity to atone? Has he simply given up hope that scientific advancement can happen without someone getting hurt, and so he does his best to balance the good and bad wrought by his explorations? Is he trying to bring someone back himself, is he trying to stall Vlad’s efforts in his own way? I really can’t be sure; there are just too many unanswered questions when it comes to Faust...)

This is where Sebastian and Faust begin to overlap. The pursuit of knowledge, an insatiable curiosity, a capacity to overreach the bounds of appropriate civility/decorum to get the information they want. It could potentially serve as a temptation for Sebas; become a vampire by Vlad’s hand and you can watch history over the span of generations. Assist in the development of an immortal, and you won’t even need someone like Comte to walk you through the different eras of time--you could explore yourself. While Sebas seems to be motivated more by service to other people, there can be no doubt that this could cause a great deal of friction. He will have to work to remind himself why he’s doing what he does and what it means to him, and whether or not becoming a vampire is truly what he wants.

But, there is also the issue of Vlad’s telepathic manipulations. Is it possible that an encounter with Faust (and by extension, proximity to Vlad/meeting Vlad head-on) could result in Sebastian being turned/experimented on without his knowledge? I.e. Vlad using his compulsion and sending him home with a word or memory of what happened. Though that’s certainly not the only possible explanation available. The other thing I was thinking about was a mechanic that was introduced in event stories prior to Sebas’ MS announcement. In the event story, MC and her suitor of choice encounter a street merchant that boasts a serum that can turn people into vampires. They, of course, don’t believe him--but the vial is procured and MC either purposefully or accidentally is exposed to it (i.e she knocks it over and it shatters in Leo’s ES). For a brief time, she exhibits vampiric qualities; she feels the thirst for blood as acutely as any of the other vampires in the mansion. I.e. In Napoleon’s ES, Sebas notices something wrong with MC when they’re just pouring vials of Rouge--the usual prepwork--and she runs out of the room looking dazed. Her odd/new instincts are only alleviated when she bites and drinks Napoleon’s blood, but after that single episode she shows no further signs of vampiric qualities. It’s a temporary but acute transformation. While I have no specifics as to how this is possible, I have to wonder if something similar might be done to Sebastian; whether as a means to test him (does he really want this? find out after the commercial break) or a kind of trick/trap laid by the antagonists. I remain unsure, but these are the two most likely explanations that come to mind if he hasn’t been fully turned.

As to whether or not his vampirism will be permanent, I’ve genuinely been oscillating on that one. I think it’s certainly possible given his intrigue (I never see much fear in him) with vampirism and his probable enjoyment with the prospect of an endless life learning about things (I can literally hear Leonardo screaming internally and I’m ngl it’s sad and funny). But there’s also something about the bite CG that speaks to strain/alarm, to surprise--that he wasn’t at all aware of the changes within himself--and I have to wonder if it might put him off of the prospect (like that he lost control/hurt MC)...Essentially I think it will just really boil down to how the symptoms come about (temporary or permanent), and how much his affections for MC might deter that curiosity/possible wish (if temporary, he might not touch the prospect again--if permanent, THAT WOULD BE SO FUCKING SEXY BECAUSE I’d wager the rest of the route might be MC trying to help him adjust/recover IN A SEXY WAY).

(Note post-translation: I fucking HATE IT HERE. The bite CG text says smth to the effect of “The bloodlust is unbearable--stay away from me; I don’t think I’ll be able to keep from attacking you.”) In light of this information, I am this 👌 close to launching myself straight into the sun. OFC his route is gonna be sweet as all shit and then it’s just gonna go downhill from there with angst. WHYYYYYYYYYY AKIHIKO (at least his voice is mega sexy and heals my wounds OTL) It also says something about “a fate that is greatly moved” so that does suggest a more permanent change than the temporary alternatives I mentioned (though we all know how Cybird loves to jerk us around so I’m leaving that up for debate)...this shit better be hurt/comfort or i s2g im throwing hands

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THE ANTICIPATION IS KILLING ME!!!!!!!

Here’s hoping he’ll make for a delightful surprise! I’m looking forward to it c:

#asks #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp sebastian #ikevamp akihiko sato #ikevamp meta #bruh i woke up to so much yelling and im still reeling from the developments #hello????? sebas lookin tender AND sexy and im ngl i am v much here for it my ass pass is SHAKING #i genuinely didn't think i'd be this curious/intrigued but now that i saw the introduction vid im just #👉👈 i am looking RESPECTFULLY #man im quaking i guess its time to translate all the sebas stories i have and think about my hubris #like i thought sebas would be the whole 'you get a human suitor if you dont want the vampire stuff as much'#and so i was like #'i do not see my ass loves vampires too much for this'#but then he went vamp in the preview and im just YEAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! **RIPS SHIRT OPEN**#bruh this changes literally everything #come here you giant nerd and let me punch a whole straight through that v card #history aint got nothin on this dynamite [REDACTED]#rambles #anywho if you need me ill be replaying the vid over and over again #ty cybird for sparing some serotonin in these trying times LMAO

83 notes · View notes

goreslibrary · 4 years

Text

The Cold Grasp of Reality and Warm Embrace of Hell

- Hello darlings! Just something to start off my little Tumblr page, its nothing amazing but I hope y’all like it -

They begged and beckoned, tears rampant down their face. Layering over top of nearly each day, each moment of life, of agony. Their throat ached, never had Villain ever imagined to have laid hunched over top a chair. The Villains chin up against the seat of it, their hands grasped around the legs of the chair. Their knuckles had gone white, their nails dug into their flesh as they overlapped themselves. Their back arched, toes curled, the crack of a whip filled the room. It formed a welt on Villains bare back, joining a collage of others upon it. Hero could only feel a grin form on their face, a chuckle escaping their chapped lips. "Look at you, little ol Villain. The big bad wolf-" they paused to pull their arm back and connect the whip to Villain yet again. "AHhhH!", Villain cried out in agony. As they put her head against the chair, they clenched their jaw feeling the burning sensation continue. " Reduced to a mere-" they cracked the whip against Villain again. "Little-", and again. " Pup." A final crack came onto Villain. With the ending of Hero's sentence, Villains limbs trembled. Villain laid there, listening as Hero slowly walked up behind them, flinching as they heard Hero stop. Villain felt goosebumps rise on his arms as Heroes shadow casted over them from the harsh lighting, solely from the opened door behind them.

Hero bent down and leaning over Villains back, their left hand pulling their head back softly, as their right traces Villains back. Villain shuddered feeling the touch of Hero against them. Hero placed their head in the crook of Villains neck, their breath causing a soft whimper to leave from Villain. Hero slowly added pressure onto Villains' neck, they wanted to hear Villains gasp of air and plea's. Hero was very pleasantly happy to watched as Villain began to struggle, at first they had left their lungs burn. The feeling of full concrete in there lungs, it was illusion but heavy. Villain wanted to just fade away, why couldn't it be that easy? They just wanted it to be easy. Villain let go of the chair, placing their hands onto Hero's arm. Villain beginning to gasp for air, thrashing around. They felt pin profiles of dots fill their vision, going from a black, to yellow to red as they slowly begin to cloud Villains vision. Villain continued to struggle, placing their body into it as their mind began to scream, over and over again. The pulse of their heart echoed in their ears, shaking his head as he slowly went back to a close, unconsciousness. Villains limbs fell loose right as Hero dropped them. A loud gasp filled the room, Followed by more coughing and gasps. Villains body curled up into a ball as their hands came upon their throat. Their vision slowly returned to them and as the struggled on the floor, a sadistic Hero stood over them, peering at the Villain. How cute~

As Villain slowly calmed down, having felt better. Or as "better" as one could be. Villain took in soft breaths though he began to hear Hero come close again. This game wasn't fun, it wasn't even creative and Villain felt it day after day. They couldn't handle it anymore, it was beginning to hurt their mind. Villains mental state consisted of a hollow nothingness. This was so tiring, Villain couldn't remember how long they had been here and hated they still reacted to it, it had only been worse when Hero hadn't heard their soft cries in agony.

Villain couldn't tell, how long had it been? Weeks? Perhaps even months, who even knew. Villain looked up as Hero opened the door to Villains room. The room had slowly gained items and perks, Villain had been submissive to Hero and in return got to, well live slightly better. Villain had been laying in bed, on their side as they sat up slowly. The villain looked off at Hero, Hero approached and though in what Villain could've only assumed was the first few days, they felt empowered to know Hero's civilian identity. The more time Villain got to think of it, it felt like dread, Hero wasn't letting them leave any time soon, not if they were letting Villain see them, they wouldn't let that information go out. Hero held a plate in hand, Villain could now see that and they moved their legs to the edge of the bed. As Hero made it next to them, s i t t i n g, next to them. Hero held the plate out to Villain as Villain took the plate. It looked delicious, but Villain didn't have an appetite. It was strange, why was the food so nice? They couldn't wrap their mind around Hero. Villain sat, eyes pondering at Hero unsure whether Hero had just come to taught them with food, it wouldn't be past Hero to do such a thing.

Hero looked at Villain a mighty stare upon their face, “Will you take the plate or are you going to sit there all day?”, Hero beckoned nudging Villain with the plate which almost made Villain jump. Villain merely held back a whimper, their body sore bruised and bloody. Villain mumbled a soft, “Sorry.” Villain took the plate with shaking hands, softly putting the plate onto their lap, it was warm and felt nice, it wasn't painfully searing like how Hero like to press against Villains skin with thick cigarettes or the end of a fire place poker. It was cozy or it would’ve been if Villain didn't feel their body trembling at the sense of having Hero in the room, their presence enough to make Villain on edge now-a-days. Once a mighty villain who loved to drive fear into other hearts whether it was through their own means of torture, horrific means of murder and general crimes against humanity.

Villains had softly grasped at the fork that rested on the side of the pate. They looked at the plate and once they went down and took a hesitant bite, their eyes widened. It tasted wondrous, Villain appreciated that hero was a good cook. This made the days upon weeks of no food then small sparse of it worth it. though as they chewed their delightful bite they almost seized up, close to choking themselves with how tense they became. Hero had startled them by talking, their head turned back to hero as they tried to finish eating. Villain hadn't realized how much food they had shoved into their mouth. “You know Villain, I can see why you enjoy doing, t h i s, to others”,Hero started. “The feeling of power over another and knowing that you have their life in their hands. It mesmerizing really.” Hero spoke in almost a sadistically disgusting manner that sent chills down Villains spine. Villain swallowed their food awkwardly as they listened to Hero. Eating the food, slowly mad them feel less then stellar from hearing Hero’s words. “I can only assume you fell into a rabbit hole, didn't you?” Hero would continue, not stopping for Villain to actually answer and even so, Villain didn't want to. “ Perhaps I cant blame you to much but-” Hero’s hand went to Villains ripped and ragged shirt and pulled them closer. Villain quivered under Hero’s grasp, trying their best not drop their plate of food. “ -I’m no scum like you, even now. You put your filthy hands onto anyone who came into your path while I, have only given you the karma you deserve,” Hero spoke with such malice and threat in the depths of their voice. “Yet even so, I’d say I’m far more merciful then you could have even dreamt to be”, Hero spoke. Villain some what fell when Hero let go of them. Villain returned to their sitting position. Thinking about those words. It was true to an extent. Villain had always been far far worse to their victims, even bringing in family or friends into such torture. Villain was a sadist, a very gruesome and terrible one at that. Though Villain usually let go or ended their victims misery fairly quickly once they got what they needed. Hero didn't have that, Villain didn't have any useful information, not anymore. Villain wasn't dead either and it didn't seem like Hero wanted to change Villain for the better. They were waiting for the Villain to die, or at least they were in Villains mind.

Villain turned their head further away from Hero, until they began to well, notice they already felt full. Their stomach had shrunk and with some level of disbelief, they didn't have much of an appetite,not with so much on their mind now. Hero seemed to notice, “Done?” Hero questioned. Hand reaching out to grab the plate, Villain flinched and muttered a simple, “y-yes.” Hero took the plate and began to walk away, Villain sat there, staring at the ground. “You should get some rest, I’m sure you’ll appreciate it”, Hero spoke to Villain with such nice delicate softness, that Villain had grown to miss from Hero in their battles. Back in what Villain could describe as their prime. They nodded their head, feeling a sense of drowsiness they didn't remember having for a very long time. Villain sighed softly, barely feeling the gaze of Hero as they closed the door behind them. Villain moved their body to lay down on the bed. It wasn't... wasn't a nice bed. All the springs that dug into Villains side could tell them that much, but they weren't complaining, it was great that they even had a bed of course. Though more and more as Villains eyes closed and their body scrunch up to keep a little more warm. Yet when they slipped into the warm embrace of sleep, their body stiffened and their breathing slowed and then, they were gone.

Hero had stood at the edge of the door, listening to the soft snores of Villain and as they stopped. Sighing Hero walked off.

They would never make their peace with Villain, no amount of torturing them had helped them see that and it wasn't until they had sat at the gravestone of Sidekick and really thought about it to realize that. Of course they would never get that pit of regret out of their heart, they had noticed far to late that Villain wouldn't make that feeling ease.

Hero could only hope the warms searing pain of Hell would welcome Villain with open arms.

#villain whump #villain prompt #villainprompts #hero whumper #hero prompt #villain and hero whump #villain and hero #villain and hero prompt #villain and hero prompts #villains and heroes #heroes #villains #prompts #whump #whumper #whumpee #villain whumpee #whump prompts

80 notes · View notes

gunnerpalace · 4 years

Note

I belonged to another heated (but no longer debatable imho) ship were I've known a lot to be IH. And ofc I feel bad they have to bear witness to people so salty about the ending and hated Ino. I hate Ino too with burning passion, and that kinda made me feel guilty. But the psychology major in me was baffled as to how they conclude immediately w/ no analysis she was hated not only because of ships but because either she was written terribly, or she was written to be terrible. Or probably both.

Why cant Ichigo and Rukia be married to someone we could *infer* (because duh it’s not canon they will argue) they are in love with? Someone they have shown to share bond with? “Oh well, its becoming commonplace that the hero doesnt end up w/ main heroine, it’s revolutionary!” Bullshit. Sadly that is logic fallacy you dumbasses. Where’s the progress? Kubo tried, barely even. And again, it’s not even about the ships, its the entire work that has become an anomaly–Bleach as became Bleauuughch.

Again, I feel bad they have to bear the weight of evert criticism, the insult, and the salt of basically a majority of bleach fandom. But I hope they can tell that majority (like 99.99999999998%) of the criticisms are valid and not just hate. If they couldnt bear to actual do analysis of why people hated it, then dont bother plead or guilt trip or go to ppl inboxes why should we just move on. Well, majority already did that’s why all was left were ppl who couldnt be bothered with actual quality.

Here’s the ugly truth about people: they can’t read.

Or they don’t want to.

We have this holdover idea from the Enlightenment that if you can gather enough evidence in fine and exacting enough detail, that you can not only discern some kind of truth, but convince other people of it through the preponderance of evidence. And we have structured our society around that idea, from politics to law to science to academia in general.

The trouble is that that idea is bullshit outside of academia.

That is not at all how regular people approach the world.

And the more we rely upon an idea that people are rational, the more we will be lost at and disappointed by the actuality that people are irrational and emotional.

Consider climate change. The scientific community has had roughly 97% consensus that climate change is being anthropomorphically driven (that is to say, somewhere between overwhelmingly and entirely caused by human activity) since at least the very early 2000s, if not back much earlier. Indeed, we know that the oil companies were aware of it at least as early as 1981! And here we are in 2020, with some 31% of the population either unsure of or disbelieving in it.

Whenever the matter is debated politically, scientists will trot out their facts and drop them on the table and point. The facts are self-evident, they feel. And then the conservative politicians will shrug and say, “I don’t believe you.”

And the scientists have no idea what to do about that. Because to their minds, facts are indisputable. You cannot argue with them.

But you can, as the conservatives illustrate. You just choose not to believe in them.

We are witnessing something very similar with COVID-19 at the moment, with large swathes of the (American) population simply not believing it to be a threat, in spite of all available evidence to the contrary.

We see the same thing with political leadership debating the question of whether to prioritize health or economics, and our media treating this as if it is a legitimate policy debate, when we already know the answer to that question from the Spanish Flu of 1918: towns and cities that were locked down and quarantined suffered fewer casualties and had much faster economic rebounds.

People generally do not read.

People generally do not process.

People generally do not analyze.

People generally do not learn.

And if they can’t do those things for very large-scale existential threats that can threaten anything from tens to hundreds of millions of people worldwide, to the entire ecosphere of the planet, why would one expect them do so for a piece of fiction?

If people cannot handle cold, hard statistical facts, or simple arithmetic, then they certainly cannot handle something as “subjective” as facial expressions or dialogue. I have written recently about how the attitude toward non-fandom things (e.g., politics) increasingly resembles that of fandom, of approaching everything as though it is merely an aesthetic exercise.

That is really what we are dealing with here: ignorance. And not merely ordinary ignorance, not even willful ignorance, but an ignorance so deliberate and cultivated that its goal is nothing less than the total erasure of the facts. (The problem here, in this particular example, are of course the people who say unequivocally, “Ichigo always loved Orihime,” in spite of all evidence to the contrary. Someone who says, “It is clear to me this wasn’t a thing, but I like IH aesthetically,” is a non-issue.)

(Demanding or trying to force this former perspective does, as you suggest in the third ask, indicate a certain insecurity and a tacit admission that the perspective being advanced is illegitimate or poorly substantiated. However, for the people so enthralled to openly admit that is a psychological admission of defeat so severe that most would literally rather die than own up to being wrong to such an extent, and to suffer the attendant internal loss of face. So they seek continual external validation of it to shore it up.)

There is, in essence, no point in communicating with this kind of fan whatsoever. They are functionally like how Kyle Resse describes the Terminator in The Terminator:

Listen, and understand! That Terminator is out there. It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear! And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead!

There is a lot of tepid discussion out there in political circles that the degree of polarization in society today is unprecedented and that a way to bridge that gap could be through shared interests and values. But in my opinion, fandom proves exactly the opposite is true: the reasons people like things that are nominally “shared interests,” and their view of those things and why they are good, are completely and utterly irreconcilable. There is, essentially, virtually zero overlap in a Venn diagram of the perspectives. Shared interests divide as much as they will ever unite.

In that regard, Bleach should be treated as both a warning and a grim assessment of our world as a whole. It is not really an aberration.

It is the future.

This community (among others) has simply been living in it a few years in advance of other people. Everyone else has gotten their first big taste of it with Trump. (The Republicans have been constructing an alternate reality since 1964, but comparatively few people were aware of how deep the rabbit hole went.)

In my estimation, it is not worth engaging with people over a shared interest with sincerity, let alone in good faith, unless you have done some degree of vetting of their perspective. Most likely observing them or their works for a time. Without that, you simply open yourself up to these people who show a total lack of discernment or rationality.

And that is a large part of why social media is such an absolute garbage fire, because as platforms they are built around precisely the opposite notion. (And largely in defiance of the idea that people might want to curate their experiences or might not want to have “healthy debate,” which is almost never healthy and seldom ever debate). Some would argue this leads to echo chambers and hug boxes, but it’s not like the alternative that these companies have produced (for profit, of course, rather than for of any ideological mission) is any better.

To boil it all down, what we are really forced to rely on (quite sadly) is a free market approach: no matter how much that side rages and waves their “canon” status around, they simply do not produce much content. They will starve long before our side does, regardless of any other factors. (Their “canon” status did not help them any in the past four years.) And the people who are agnostic (e.g., the “I’m Still Bleach” crowd that is for some reason vaguely invested in the series as a whole) will lose interest and move on to the next shiny thing.

The only thing that is necessary in the face of all this is really patience. In the meantime, the best thing is simply to ignore the existence of such parties utterly.

#Asks

24 notes · View notes