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#i barely even know the guy and even i dont think theres a valid reason to dislike him
nostalgic-muffins · 5 months
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cant believe there r people out there that hate mephisto. if you hate him, write me 9 paragraphs on why you hate him. write me a college level essay on why you think hes the worst obey me character. i DARE you.
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@sweatandwoe​
wheezes softly okay so monstery silco au thoughts 
idk if i have a name for this au or not yet but i have a lot of loose scrambled ideas and Vibes and various atmospheric scenes floating in my head
ive no idea if any of this is quality and all i know about league lore is what i can glean from wikis and one very enthustiastic infodumping friend
i also just, really like subtle monster shit. this person is a monster but oh, they could so easily be human.
ahhh this is all just very. slapped togethor thoughts its not super coherent apologies
so bare with me
im rly fascinated with tahm kench and i know im not the only one and i see a Lot of ppl who like to associate him with silco in some way- wether silco worships him, made a deal with him, whatever, a lot ppl seem to like playing with the idea and theyre valid
to my understanding tahm kench isnt exactly limited in what he can appear as- of course theres the squat and charming catfishalligator man in his jaunty little hat but to my understanding he can take on other appareances? idk i recall reading this but i cant recall where to save my life so like for the sake of this au we’ll just assume he Can appear human if he wants to 
we also know like nothing about silco’s childhood etc so im playing fast and loose
im never sure if im of the opinion that silco had shit parents or parents who tried their best but honestly its likely a little of column a a little of column b and im rambling too much and need to get to the point
in the context of this au sil’s mom had a mysterious but charming paramour who often made her promises of wealth and good fortune and one day he just sort of vanished from her life but not without leaving her pregnant
she successfully passed off the baby as her husband's by the sheer fortune that said baby seemed to resemble her and not her paramour in the least
paramour was, obvs a this point, tahm kench
my reasoning why for he did this in the first place is mostly that hes just fucking around for shiggles- theres other reasons but im a bit scatterbrained at the moment and words to explain are not coming to me so great
silco is largely the same as he is in canon- he’s not visibly inhuman in any way, and he doesnt act much different at all. though, i suppose, in the right light, teeth can look unnaturally sharp, eyes too solidly dark like nothing human should have, etc
but he’s prone to disassociative states and cravings for Meat ideally Very Fresh and Possibly Alive Meat and they’re worse when he’s in compromised emotional or physical states
his father left/died/whatever early on leaving him largely in the care of just his mother and while she did her best rumors inevitably spread of her weirdass half feral kid, his ill temper, his strange disposition, and the massive amount of meat he seems to require
stories that he was slowly eating her out of house and home
stories that he wouldnt stop even if the only flesh she had to provide was her own
eventually, she too was gone
i dont think sil actually hurt her or attacked her in any way, but one day it was just silco, alone, with no one else, and the rumor mill churns and youve got stories about some scrawny monster that killed and ate his own mother
he and vander do end up friends as in canon, i dont doubt b/c vander took pity on this weird guy with a bad, bad reputation but a relatively skittish (if bitey, hah) personality 
like i said a lot of this au is just sort of various scenes playing out in my head- sil ends up attacking people occasionally and its a bloody fucking mess every time
hes a conniving, sneaky little schemer and any outright deals anyone makes with him always seem to fall in his favour
he has his skills, and he’s useful, and in his own way he’s a loving and devoted friend
he is still the deeply driven revolutionary we have in canon- he loves his home and his people but he’s harsh and not afraid to spill blood
the drowning incident occurs more or less the same but vander comes out of it with a lot more than just his arm wound- silco bites, and as it turns out under life or death circumstances he can be a lot less human than he’s always seemed
i dont think he knows he’s tahm kench’s offspring until the drowning incident, having some kind of “conversation” hallucination with the river king while under and learning of his parentage
ironically the shimmer he takes for his eye is a blessing- shimmer works as an appetite suppressant and as he gets older there are way, way less incidents
jinx knows her dad is weird and so does everyone working under him but for the most part its not a problem, yes the boss is fucking scary they all know this its nothing new
i think shit gets Real odd tho post-death
im not sure silco can be properly killed, not in a way that sticks right
his body gets dumped in the river and that should be the end of it, but i think perhaps there are strange sightings for years to come, mysterious disappearances of people who wander the shores alone
im playing with this ball of idea clay and having great fun with it, others can play too if they wanna
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floralkittygambler · 3 years
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Reposting for reasons
Response to Honest’s post here: Doing this to spread this awareness more as I know theres a bit of a rift in the critical community - plus I really fucking go on. Im PISSED and I do apologise however it NEEDS urgent addressing. I know people will hate me for it but Im used to hate and honestly? Hating rather than helping to solve the issue only furthers my fucking point here. So yeah this is so more people are aware (no offense to any of those involved in said rift either, but this is an important message. Thank you for understanding and if I can do anything to make all sides comfortable, then please message me and I’ll do my upmost.) “ More awareness of this is needed. Even if it’s your favourite, you can’t justify their shit but rally against another’s shit. Have people tell you you’re experiences arent real or invalid because, like Husk, people have - in real life - shipped you with someone you are far from comfortable with but you still treat them like a person. Because you have basic respect. And people force you to accept harassment, touching, stalking, advances for THEIR satisfaction. People use you for their fantasies. But you’re just a ‘tsundere’ for it. Or you have addiction issues but people think being with another addict will ‘save’ you because you’re apparently too incompetent to save yourself. Love isnt some magic fuckin cure so stop romanticising it as a fuckin saviour. It’s gross and fuckin creepy. Get stalked and have someone NEVER accept your no just because you show youre still decent enough to not treat them shitty or any different from anyone else. Try having someone way older or way younger (both in morally fucked up ways) advance on you and people encourage that. People you’re supposed to feel safe around.
People touch you when you pull away or show discomfort. Follow you home. Have pictures of you and wont accept you dont like them like that and it’s not ‘playing hard to get’ or ‘the thrill of the chase’. Fuck. OFF. In fact, Im not only disappointed in the fandom. Im disappointed in the entire team who some should know better from their OWN personal experiences - or at least the bare minimal of being a fucking adult. Im disappointed in especially females (sorry idk whether girl or woman is more appropriate here-) who statistically are more likely to have experienced something similar at some point in their lives think this is a cute gay moment. No. Angel is made out as a fucking predator - Im not saying he is, Im saying that his persistence is very fucking unwelcome like one. People like Husk dont need that fucking invasiveness. They/We need patience and someone on our level. Angel’s I know are the fuckin polar opposite - and some of them I know are very sexually harassing, including unwanted touching. It’s a shitty way to present gay people. Gays are fuckin people. Some are cunts and some arent. It’s a HUMAN thing. But considering the shit theyve been subjected to, presenting a gay as a victim only to also show them as a perpetrator is insulting! And for those Ive seen argue this about how people like AD wouldnt know how to express their love normally and whatnot? His pig. His best friend. He’s in his fucking 30s. There are literal real life criminals who get molested as kids and then go on to molest kids. Not all who grow up like that turn into nonces. Stop just fucking STOP justifying and romanticising this bullshit! I used to see the good in AD but now he makes me fucking sick. Especially with my verrrrrry fucking real traumas and connections. But fuck me, eh? Because this fictional guy matters so much more. Fuck real victims. And whilst we’re at it, fuck AD too when it suits your fetishes! Sarcasm aside, the fans and the team need to straighten up their abhorrent behaviour. Stolas. Fucking clearly having an affair, knowingly fucking up his daughter’s mental health and bribing a guy into sex who only wants the book and nothing more. He even has a fucking warning button over Stolas- Guys, how do you think any of this is cute? Even the team gross me out- I genuinely see potential and talent and it’s all gone to shit to satisfy horny teens, horny adults, and literally everyone who doesnt for the life of them understand being an adult is more than sex, drugs, violence and swears! I REALLY want to keep enjoying HB/HH but it’s getting harder and harder with such ignorant and bordering lazy creators (note: lazy as in wont do the fucking research or actually listen to real criticism and victims), such despicable fans (yeah, some HDers fuckin mocked that they triggered my ED, yet they had the fucking NERVE to support Angel’s potential ED AND laugh and blame me for me getting treated so badly for actually having the balls to call Angel and the teams hypocrisy. I got told to kill myself, that my problems arent real - oh but Angels apparently is! Which... They *are* but AD isnt real so technically only onlookers will suffer and not a drawing  - and they just excused their toxic behaviours. These people are like “aww poor angie babey!” yet fuckin INSULT sex workers. All this red in Hazbin yet it feels everyone and they mama colour blind. The issues are getting worse and fans are outright becoming EVIL, VILE, Vindictive little bullies - from kids to adults. You SHOULD be ashamed of yourself if you conduct yourself in such a manner. And you need to readjust your attitudes and behaviours because the only fuckers getting hurt are actual fucking victims. Ever been violated and been gaslit so much you STILL fucking question it’s reality? So you drown that shit out yet somehow it’s effects still hit you? Fetishise it. Make it your uwu gae couple goals, you’re no better than people believing Harley and the Joker werent toxic af. If this shit happened to you, most of you would actually SEE where we’re all coming from. Also, stop making gay a fetish - you’re like those creepy old men in the alley heckling lesbians to make out so they can wank off. Gays, no ALL the LGBT+ are fucking people too. So dont give me that bullshit then start turning everything just gay or just straight to mentally wank off to. It’s degrading and dehumanising. And yes, fiction does effect reality. You crush on a fictional character? Mourn one? Support one? Hell, fuckin jerk off to one - that’s affecting reality. Remember how in fiction all blacks were treated as villians? Look how theyre treated IRL. JAWS, great classic unfortunately their was a spike in shark killings over a fucking movie - the shark in the movie wasnt even real for the most part because they dont behave like that! (Also the animatronic was so shit they genuinely had so many issues - I think they even took to naming each one! Some fun trivia there!). Tiger sharks are more nasty than great whites as tiger sharks will hunt and eat a human. Great whites prefer seals and dislike human flesh, they just mistake us for seals. Hell, theres the toothless basking shark - theyre often SWAM WITH by divers for being so friendly. Yet Jaws made people think all sharks are bloodlusting over humans. Slenderman was created for a fucking contest and that influenced a stabbing (NOT Victor’s fault). Watch a horror movie that isnt based on a real life event and tell me that at least ONE has left you peaking over your shoulder. Stella may be a bitch - we dont know for certain - but try getting cheated on. Y’know what? Try growing up in such a broken home like Octavia. Yeah reaaaaaal fucking cute now, huh? Funny how as well y’all petition for male victims to be taken seriously then laugh when fictional males experience this abuse, further adding to stigma. You can be hit on by the hottest mf on the planet but if you arent interested, that should be respected! Also we’ve all been inspired by at least one fictional character so yeah. Yknow, since I was little Ive been fighting for sex worker and homeless rights. But HH/HB treatment of both leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I’ll still fully support sex workers and the homeless, but that’s the fucking effect this show is having. Bearing in mind I wont ever share everything Ive been through - and I shouldnt fucking have to in order to be believed and validated (obvs proof is required in a legal case but that’s a whole other topic). Why should I share MY fucking pain especially when you fuckers have belittled and triggered it more so? We have our rights to our secrets but fuck ME you lot NEED to start acting appropriately and like decent fucking humans. ‘iTs HeLl’ yeah and welcome to Earth- the team and yourselves live HERE. You obide by THESE rules. And as someone with beliefs (and a LOT of ancient fucking texts and studies on this shit) their Hell isnt even a proper Hell! It’s closer to purgatory and even then it’s not. Regardless, it’s a poorly built world with the lore consistently changing per episode and tweet, with many plot holes, and is apparently easy to get into - even via accidentally watching porn according to a stream. If youre gonna parade youre a fucking expert and research into demonology and use real believed figures, at least get THAT right. In fact, Lucifer and Lilith (and Stolas tbf) are ESPECIALLY risky as theyre a lot more complex than most easy access texts will tell you. Likewise, Stolas’s first introduction and main focus is sex. He’s one of the FEW Goetia demons that dont have some involvement in relationship issues at ALL. He’s known for astrology, crystals and herbs but hes also known to aid MONEY troubles (it’s lesser known but it’s true! HB Stolas is an insult to the Prince). Turning Vodou into something evil is vile considering it’s powerful and liberated slaves. Pentagrams are nothing to do with Satan, they’re magic based sigils. Upside down cross is the symbol of a SAINT. It’s just some edgy attempt to trick people into believing they know more than they do. Also you should NEVER dabble and doodle sigils without knowing the meanings or respecting what they behold. Vox and Val, real fuckin cute way to make them look like a stupid fucking highschool drama instead of a fucking SEX TRAFFICKER (note: real pimps often target YOUNG folks too - aka minors - and groom them into sex work. Theres different types of pimp. Viv has shown barely any understanding of ‘the game’ and its a fucking insult to injury. Yes we KNOW what a fucking pimp and prozzie are! We dont need to see it. We need REAL AWARENESS.) and a fucking scheming bastard of a CEO salesman botman. And yet even THEN lets go a step further and make some yandere wuv on boyfweind aboose! Fuck off- Now I love a good anime but these tropes are getting fucking dangerous now. And unrealistic to real love and relationships. Kids nowadays know fuck all on a healthy relationship (neither did the fuckin 50s tbf) and Im seeing more romaticism and glorifying abusive situations. Like the show ‘You’. Ok, there’s a fuckin bloke online who slaughtered innocents and kidnapped yet people commented how cute he is on his IG and that they want to be kidnapped or killed by him next. Dont believe me? Look up Peter Manfredonia Connecticut and the comments people left him and then tell me why shit like whats being presented in HH/HB ISNT fucking concerning - because it is. For a series about redemption, it’s brilliant at the opposite (Quote from the creator herself, Viv has posted that it’s influencing her bad choices. Even as a joke, proof’s in the pudding). And the overall focus on sex in the way Viv does is so immature and really creepy, and this is from an ADULTS perspective. From one adult to another, Im concerned as to why any of them think this is a normal fixation. Then again they’ve hired quite a large amount of dodgy folks and even a child. Most of this shit gets avoided with a basic background check like most companies run. I DO like Hazbin. Or the premise. I love some of the cast and spite the others. In Helluva, I just like a tiny portion of the cast. And I critique it so harshly because Viv DOES need a wakeup slap, grounding to reality, people who arent going to big her up or kiss her arse for once and shape her up to be the best she can be. The actually reach and even surpass her potential. And to reach where you need to be, there’s a lot of harsh lessons youll face. That’s life. Shes chosen one of the most HEARTLESS industries and if she blocks out critique as ‘hate’ then she’s not strong enough and wont last. It’s just another unprepped YanDev again (except I dont believe Viv to be a nonce. Even with her dodgy past and dodgy present, I think her perspective on sex and relationship with sexuality is FAR from healthy BUT I dont believe she’s a pedophile. Ive bled my fair share and so far, I just think her sex perspective isnt healthy or mature for her age. But there’s little to nothing to suggest actual noncery - dont worry about accusations there. But YanDev is totally a dirty predator. Just clearing that up). Viv NEEDS some harshness and stability if she wants to do things right. And it’ll make her fucking cry but if she loves these projects as much as she claims to, then you’ll sacrifice blood, sweat and tears for that shit. Even the strongest points are mediocre at best when properly observed. She CAN do more, but she’ll have to face the harsh music. Viv wont see this, but if she does, I dont care if it upsets her. Why? Because this is that much of an issue - something she’s cultivated - that she needs to take action and not ignore it or be secretive about it. She needs to grow up and get tougher skin. Im not saying this to cause her pain. In fact, I wouldnt waste my fucking limited time if I DIDNT care. Trust me, I have duties to be met at a certain quota every single day. I say this shit only because I give a shit and care. If we met, she’d fucking hate me. But people like me are good for shaping people up to their potential. And we arent always this ‘tough love’ either. But when someone needs that level of harshness to help themselves, we’re not afraid to lose people or cause upset if the results end up being the best for them. If she ever saw this, she needs to re fucking evaluate her message, her story, and those she’s choosing to welcome into her circle. And all Im seeing is one rookie mistake after the other. Her paid patreon discord. Just like the messages Honest has posted on her side of being harassed (not in Vivs fyi), Ive experienced shit and bullying and even stay silent on their for being attacked for a group I fuckin paid to be in and yet I feel isolated. It’s all arsekissing and ‘thank you viv’ (thats an actual channel-) and it feels like a place of borderline worship and people trying to appease her 24/7 whilst kicking others with different opinions down. There’s so many I love but I aint kissin yer fuckin arse. Ask the closest friend I have - we’re fucking raw and wont just side with each other just because. We’ll call each other out if we think they’ve fucked up and then help each other build themselves up better. Because real fuckin people who actually care wont just want to be adored by you. They’ll care enough to point out your bullshit and help you, even if they upset you at the time. They’re real and upfront with you. People like us arent always the easiest to be close to either because we arent afraid of upsetting someone if it’s in their best interest and to help them. Likewise, we dont go out looking for fights either. Most times, we’re fuckin soft bastards- All this shit listed is the fuckin surface level of the real life hell of this fandom. And unsurprisingly, those who experience little to no toxicity have always been higher on that popularity ‘food chain’ - enough admirers and shared opinions that people wanna arse kiss regardless of their OWN feelings as well as neutral perspectives. I’d say you’re the lucky fans, but you’re not. You’re sheltered, and that isnt always the best way to be sadly. As for the fans. If Ive upset you. Well... I dont care. Because many of you have actively sought me out and weaponised my traumas against me. You never cared about my feelings then. Why should I care about yours? Im not doing this out of malice. Im fed up of humans behaving so pathetically yet claiming to be high and mighty. Most of you have been arseholes to those in and out of the community. The victims and non-victims alike. Hardly any of you considered once my real suffering. You put a drawing over a life. Many lives. You had the audacity to tell me Im full of shit. Some even using my real traumas to make a mockery of me and those Im around with a very similar history. Some with traumatic histories that differ from my own. You hardly ever considered the real lives of those effected. So no, Im not sorry for having the fucking balls to this day to still stand up for our rights and give us a voice that’s long been stolen. Im not sorry for being a fucking victim. Im not sorry for saying what desperately NEEDS voicing. And Im not sorry for not conforming to you or any fandom just to belong. We deserve better than to constantly be your fuckin arse monkeys (well... the trope is butt monkey but yknow-) and to be mistreated, misrepresented and harmed by you. You’re no different to the school bullies who give speeches on anti-bullying day. And I hope every single one of you starts looking into yourselves and improving. PS: Depending on the texts you read, Lucifer is said to have been redeemed or to be redeemed. Fun fact to haunt yalls with~ “
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fanguuuhhhrl · 4 years
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Im kinda obsessed with I-Land right now. I love 23 boys and if possible i would like them all to debut but the elimination is in 30 minutes so im going to post my top 12 picks before it airs (kind of in order, kind of not, im biased, this is based on an unsure mixture of skill and personality, could change but most likely not):
1. Sunoo- BITCH!!! WTH!!! I JUST LOOK AT HIM AND MY SEROTONIN LEVELS BURST THROUGH THE ROOF!! He is a puppy!! He is amazing. If you didnt know anyone yet and you put all 23 boys in a line up. He will draw your attention with his sunshine smile :)))) he is so heartwarming. Most people be like "i have no filter" but they just be mean, but this guy is different, he literally has no ability to hide what he thinks but it never comes off as anything negative. He says "Me! I can do it!" but it's just endearing and never comes across as trying to show off. He says "there was a little bit of friction" and when the members look at himshocked, he looks at them shocked too.... theres no dull moment when he's in frame. It's so amazing how pure a person can be. But know that i am not just rooting for personality but for talent. his voice... His Voice!!! Vocally geonu and heeseung really slayed the butterfly performance but if you ask me, "save me" had a more emotional attack. His facial expression is just brimming of feelings. His voice is so raw. Also You know that part in save me where he transitions from head voice into chest voice really smooth??? You'll know what im saying if you see it. thats so fucking satisfying that i had to replay it so much. I definitely replayed the save me performance more times honeslty. And the way he dances!!! It might not be That refined yet but that's the charm... it's so raw and full of emotions... so like him. I can see myself stanning this group long term if he debuts with them.
2. Jungwon- tf i love this boy so much. his visuals already stood out to me when they were entering i-land, then his voice stood out to me in the first challenge... he did that hard ass choreography without any audible changes to his voice that i had to rewind that multiple times (more than the editor already did) then the moment i saw him dance the center in episode 4??? BOY???? BOY!!!! that was my breaking point... i can't believe im saying this about men but i already knew i would die for him... plus he is so sweet :((( his eyes are just so naturally cute but i was so shocked in the last challenge when he was able to pull off that fierce ass look.... i am devastated... im about the same age but my parental instincts are at work here. plus SPOILER ALERT to those who plan to watch he won first place in both the first and last challenge can everybody say jungwon ace
3. Geonu- my feelings for him are much like jungwon :((( except theres more parental instincts... and i say this despite being younger than him but whatever age is just a vibe... HE IS SO LIDDOL :((( i want to be his mom :(( at first, personality wise, it's hard to notice him bc he's a little calm and laidback... but its the little things that draw you to him :((( his glasses and hoodies just seem a little bit big on him and that just makes me smile for some reason... he cries silently when people are sent to the ground and he gets along well with the people... i noticed him first together with jungwon in the first i land challenge because they had the most stable performance. but i've never been more attached to him than when he sang butterfly (favorite bts song anyone??)... i honestly thought they could debut then and there and i wouldnt bat an eye... also it's so funny that the one thing i identified him with during the early episodes was the fact that whenever the camera pans to him, he just has the dead eye stare and parted lips (think: pokerface but confused) especially with the huge ass glasses but in the end the poker face thing that stuck to me became the thing that worked against him i cri
4. Jay- hold on folks this is going to be a long one. Jay has such a powerful personality that at first made me hesitant about liking him... idk he just seemed like the guy i would not vibe with in real life, but the longer time passed, the more he became one of my favorites and i root for him now like crazy. at first it was funny when they kept rejecting him for the vocal parts, but the more it went on, i was so sure that if it was me, i would have cried and dropped then and there, but it was so amazing watching him push through that and he didnt even lie about how he felt. his unique determination is such a breath of fresh air, a little heartwarming and oh so inspiring. i honestly learned a lot from just watching him. the time he went to the ground was so crucial to his development as a person, leader and performer. it was so mindblowing when he became the leader at the ground and even adapted heeseung's teaching methods. you know that meme "improvise, adapt, overcome?" he is the exact personification of that. what i loved about him the most is that even with his steely determination, he didnt enforce or project that on the other grounders, he just shared it with them. he understands when they need rest, encouragement or massages. he was such a caring leader. Skill wise- i can't say anything. He already proved himself so many times. Great dancer and potential vocalist. The mnet specials also show how much sweeter he is than the show shows him to be. He takes care of everyone, and has more of mother duck than street gang vibes (and he knows how to cook!!). And at the end, while he seems to be mostly self- oriented about debuting, he ends up spending most of his time teaching others and helping them improve. I just love him. Debut Jay 2k20!!!
5. Sunghoon- tf this guy is so cool and laidback that i didnt even pay much attention to him during the early parts but he just keeps crawling into my heart because so many members love him so damn much??? and he just goes along with them?? they want me to do triple axel while average people can't even do a single axel on a trampoline?? ok imma give them a double axel tho. jake is challenging me to arm flexing? yeah why not? k wants me to dance?? yeah lemme just spin 50 times. jay wants to shower together?? weird but im not strongly against the idea. ej wants to scare people? count me in. someone needs a hand to hold?? ok here's my warm hand to the rescue... everyone just wants to be his friend that he birthed my favorite sunoo scene "im cuter than him [jake]" and he was just like "yeah ok i guess so" sksjsk sunoo is that how you ask someone to be your friend jshdk??? and can i just say? as a figure skating fan, he has automatic +52536 points... and when the judges said he's the most natural performer out of them??? i vibed with that hard.. he dances well so naturally and he takes your attention without even seeming like he's trying to. that dance performance with k and jungwon?? i thought at first that his energy wouldnt catch up but damn boy my eyes were just trackingnhim the entire time unintentionallu that i had to rewind and he was just as great as all of them... with the additional benefit of being a stunt boy!! and though it might seem effortless, we saw that he practiced so hard for it. overall a 100/100 boy with a naturally charismatic personality that bleeds into his performance... as a fellow 02 liner i would also like to apply as his bestfriend thank you
6. Heesung- what can i say except he's a perfect boy ok thats it why are you still reading... jk... ok lets talk about him... skill wise?? I cried during the butterfly performance. i marvel at his vocal stability. his voice is so crystal clear. his dancing is so clean. his skills are superb but most of all, theyre already so refined. there's nothing more i could ask for. personaloty wise... i also have a lot to say... despite his celebrity status, it's awesome how he can make the other trainees comfortable with him. he's kind and soft and lovely.
but because i am me, i have to overanalyze people so idk skip this if you dont like that. for someone who's experienced being an academic achiever... i sure do vibe with his personality a lot... you know when there's a group activity and you're so sure you can lead it well but you don't want to? half because you dont want to come off as a show off and half bc you genuinely still have self-doubts, and you're scared of falling short of expectations. Also, you feel that if it all fails, you'll be responsible so you have to feel that everyone approves you before you can take leadership and show your entire thing. And the moment you feel validated and take the reins, you start unconsciously projecting your perfectionist attitude on people??? yeah... i love that despite being an almost perfect person he still has issues most people can find relatable and that, in addition to the talent makes me want to root from him. (im also going to take a stab and guess that his mbti is probs ixxp) i'll be honest tho, because its like 100 percent sure now that he'll debut, im not super attached to him??? i love him tho but he's just not in any danger so i can just let my support for him chill. i think amidst this, bc most of the trainees depend a lot on him, i mostly hope for him to take care of his mental health
7. Daniel- awww danielll... i went into i-land not knowing anyone's ages so i had a brief whiplash feeling when someone said daniel is 15... it's because he's so emotionally mature?? like he's such a supportive and caring person that it barely struck me the that he might be the youngest?? he already caught my attention when they performed "any song" bc they just seemed like they were having fun and doing their best without the pressure of whether they would win ir not, and for me that attitude is something you'd see from more experienced performers. and during the second ep when he just felt the need to comfort everyone bc he's got such a high score?? i loved that an i was so bummed out when they eliminated him. the save me performance was definitely a cherry on top that i just had to love him more than i already do... he may be young but he's as ready to debut as everyone else.
8. Jake- jake is just one of the people who showcased so much growth between ep 1 and ep 2. he already had the right attitude when they performed crown and he just had to improve skills and stage presence, and improved he did. despite being one of the trainees with the shortest training time, he was the one teaching the others by the end it just supports my theory that he might have been an ace as well if he just had the same amount of training as everyone else. im also truly in love with his mischievous antics. he seemed like an introvert to me at first but he came out of his shell and i love that. also i just crave more moments of him and sunghoon's friendship (they both seemed like introverts who found someone they could be extroverts with in each other) i am 👌this close to storming i land and demand that they let me join their merry little band of 2002 children
9. Niki- dance skills= 100 he's just so good it's unreal... it's insane... everytime he's on screen i hear boss musicand i cant even imagine him being younger than anyone, let alone taki. i get why some people dislike him but honestly i think it's just because they don't see him as a child... but he is. i was honestly a bit mad for him when they kept guilt tripping him into leading all of them, and i understood his tjought process when he thought he just kept failing everyone and when he thought things just kept backfiring on him. he is held on such a high pedestal and i dont think he deserves that kind of burden. as for me, it would just be a waste of talent to let him go. his attitude could still improve, as we'd seen when he eventually volunteered to help everyone. i also felt bad when he said that he's scared he might not be voted bc some people dont base on skills and i love him and i just want him to kmow that he's loved
10. Taki- what the hell can i even say?? he's the kindest softest boy ever. he tries to see the good in people and is very hardworking... he listens to people well and actually follow them, so he improves a lot... he knows people think he's cute and he tries and tries and tries to look fierce if the song calls for it... he is amazing
11. K- i really can't say anything, he really stands out during performances. also very pro at dancing. his choreography??? *chef's kiss* and i think the younger trainees depend a lot on him, besides heesung and so he's good at keeping the team together.
12. EJ- im really hesitant about the last person to be the twelfth i lander because it could almost be anyone and i wouldnt be too bummed out bc theyre almost all equally talented... the thing with ej tho is he already gets along well with the i landers and has harmony with other members. (plus see above: im a sucker for the 2002 line) i think its a tiny bit unfair to base it on this bc the others didnt even get a chance to show what they can bring to the group so im torn.
bonus: i wouldnt feel too bad if it were jaebeom (he has great voice, the producers think he's not too stand out bc he's weak at dance, but the i land is already so full of people whose expertise is dancing, so i think there should be someone who's specialty is singing), kyungmin (i really appreciated how hard he worked during the last test and it actually paid off, i honestly noticed him there even if he was always at the back. i also loved his determination and i was so touched when he and jaebeom were talking and he said "there's really nothing to do but believe in the impossible right?" it's just that the i landers were already ahead of him in terms of skills so he failed the votings) and hanbin (i've watched his cover videos and he's really good at dancing and stage projection. like i was honestly wondering why it wasnt showing in the performances :((( and he hadnt even had too much screentime to actually See what he's capable of.
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thanks to a conversation with @declermontdiana i’m now thinking about the end of riverdale s2 and where all the characters were at after the chaos in town and the black hood reveal, and i think it’s time to talk about the fact that alice was perfectly positioned to be pulled into a cult.
because while she was vulnerable to the farm because of how traumatized she was, i’ve never seen a discussion of the way that she was also incredibly, horribly alone in the face of nearly being murdered by her husband and finding out he was the source of the town’s terror for all that time.
yes, we know that betty was trying to look after her, but not being able to pull herself together around betty could only have added ‘i suck as a mom’ feelings to alice’s emotional problems in the immediate aftermath. despite what betty thinks because she’s spent her life trying to be everything to everyone, alice would actually be a worse parent if she were using betty for friendship and emotional support, because that shouldn’t be her teenage daughter’s role.
and yes, polly also came and offered her support and potential help. but despite being a mom already, polly is her teenage daughter too, who she shouldn’t expect to lean on, so it makes sense that alice would be more likely to throw all her trust in with the adults in the cult that polly eased her into.
but why, after everything she had been through, would she decide to trust and get help from total strangers? we focus so much on the fact that she was an easy target, like her instability after hal and fake-charles and even polly is the only factor. but alice’s openness to the cult because of what happened to her is just part of it--the world around her matters too.
and the reality of it is that alice let the farm become her most trusted support system because nobody else was there for her.
alice doesn’t have a single female friend in riverdale. though she and sierra probably have the least antagonistic dynamic, that doesn’t make them friends...and hermione, mary, and penelope make it very clear how they feel about her. obviously there are valid reasons why she’s not well-liked, but having made more enemies than friends doesn’t change the fact that alice is a mess after hal and in need of sympathy and support.
arguably, the two people in town who you’d most expect might care about how alice is doing after she’s nearly strangled to death by her husband are fp and fred. with fp, there’s all the history and obvious feelings that s3 showed us were still there even after their affair ended...and fred has both known her forever and is a genuinely nice guy. he may snark back when alice is being a jerk about archie, but it’s hard for me to believe that he wouldn’t check in on his next door neighbor who’s just been through a tragedy.
however, that’s where the events of s2 really conspire to leave alice totally isolated. fp’s son is in the hospital barely alive, and fp dove into a losing fight with a rival gang--he’s in no shape to immediately rush to her side, even once word does reach him about hal. meanwhile, fred was hal’s first victim. he nearly died thanks to alice’s husband, which i imagine would make it hard to offer her unsolicited support, even though fred assures betty she’s not to blame when it comes up.
now personally for the sake of human decency, i think it’s totally crappy that alice was left alone in that house to suffer. i don’t care how little she was liked in town, anybody who’s nearly murdered should get checked on by someone. but as far as we’re aware, that doesn’t happen. after hal tries to kill alice, the only people who come to her door are reporters looking for more scandal. (you could argue that this part is a twisted kind of karma given how often alice’s reporting reveled in others’ pain, but that shouldn’t mean she’s also without other visitors.)
when you really think about it in context, alice and the farm make even less sense. the last thing alice cooper should want to do is trust a stranger just because her daughter vouches for him--the last time she did that, she had to bleach her whole kitchen! and by the end of s2, she’s found out that she can’t trust the last twenty years of her life, the most intimate partner she had, or her own judgement.
only desperation can explain her throwing herself into the arms of polly’s new friends, when she must have the worst trust issues she’s ever had in her life.
but honestly, of course she’s desperate. her entire carefully-crafted life unraveled a piece at a time over the last three years. she lost her older daughter to the blossoms, her younger daughter to the serpents, her husband to madness or evil or both depending on how you look at it, her credibility at her job once her history was revealed, and her rekindling with fp because they’re both idiots who can’t get it together. she wasn’t even left with a shred of normalcy--or the facade of it that made her life worthwhile before.
alice smith became alice cooper who reinvented herself again and again once things started falling apart, and it’s not clear if even she knows who she really is deep down. so she’s heading fast toward middle age, with very little to show for it, living in a house full of ruined memories with no one to talk to, and no reason to believe any of the other adults in riverdale would be there for her if she did reach out.
in the aftermath, all she has is one daughter she didn’t protect from her own father, who she never knows how to save...and another who’s offering her hope.
it’s terrible that she took it, as is everything alice has done since the farm became the center of her world. i don’t know anyone who’s blindly trying to defend her s3 behavior, or who isn’t expecting an awful reckoning someday.
but at the same time, of course she accepted the help that edgar evernever was reaching out to her, during the absolute lowest period in her life.
he was the only one who offered.
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personshapedsplder · 5 years
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How did u discover you were aroace? Have you ever been in a relationship/would you ever? Like how do you feel about it all? (I don’t mean that in a “did you ever TRY dating” type way btw it’s a genuine q bc my friend is ace and she’s dated a lot and is currently dating someone and I’m trying to like figure out my own sexuality bc I don’t know myself but I don’t feel “normal” :/ and you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, I hope this ask doesn’t make you uncomfortable!) -M
hi M!
so the way i realized i was aroace is sort of unusual. id heard abt asexuality and aromanticism in high school and it sort of seemed familiar to me, but i refused to let myself rly consider it? so for years and years and years, i told myself i was straight bc i just couldn’t handle letting myself realize that i was queer. it was too painful to think abt. but then, when i was around 21, i was talking abt relationships with a friend, trying to give her advice, and it was just so hard for me to understand what she was going through and i finally just made this offhand joke like ‘im sorry i cant help you much im like practically aromantic LOL’ and i expected her to be like ‘oh haha yeah arent we all!!’ or something LOL but my friend was like :o what rly??? and then i realized. it hit me like a ton of BRICKS like i literally had to sit down where i stood because it shook me so hard. like, i sort of just realized that i WAS different from my friend and that i finally had to actually face this, i had to accept it. and it was super super painful for me but i was finally able to come to terms and learn to love myself how i am!
ik this is an unusual story most people it seems spend a long time thinking abt it and being uncertain and kind of shakily coming to terms slowly, but me, i sort of knew for a long time and forced myself to ignore it and then it sort of all blew up in my face LOL so your story might be different from mine but thats ok!!
so i HAVE been in a relationship. I dated a guy rly long distance all through high school and my first year of college. It was a really, really weird experience for me LOL. we’d met in real life once and became friends and i thought because i had something of a “friend crush” on him at the time that that meant I was in love with him. spoiler alert, i was not LOL so it was rly convenient for my denial through hs bc i could say ‘oh im not attracted to anyone bc i have a BOYFRIEND’ LOL but i never had to see him or touch him or barely even talk to him bc he lived so far away and that’s the only reason it lasted so long at all. our relationship, from my end at least, was the emptiest relationship of my life. we were barely even friends, but he would keep sending me all this gushy stuff and it would make me uncomfortable, but i thought i was just shy. it was like i couldn’t connect with him, he was on some sort of other planet and i think part of that was bc he was trying to connect w me on a romantic level and i just couldn’t do that. eventually, i dumped him when I was like, 19 or so, bc i couldn’t stand it anymore. i dont think i would ever be in another romantic relationship ever. i would consider a QPR maybe, but it’s also not something im looking for rn. ive sort of decided that my life will be partner-less but thats ok bc i have so many beautiful friends who i love! i dont feel the need to have an official partner. lots of asexuals and aromantics do, like your friend, and they’re totally cool and rad and valid, that’s just not me is all!
HOWEVER all that being said, my experiences are just my experiences!! Every asexual and aromantic has a different life! also, of course, i can’t fit all my experiences and thoughts abt being aroace into just one ask bc my experiences are my whole entire life, being aroace is a huge part of how ive identified w the world around me ever since i was born. that being said, there’s so much more i could share that might be helpful to you. if you have any more questions, or want me to clarify something, pls send me more asks! or even DM me!! id love to tell you more and answer your questions!
if you wanted advice abt figuring out your sexuality, i’d say just follow your gut. if you get the feeling you’re asexual or aromantic or some part of you relates to that, even if you’re not 100% certain, follow your gut!! it’s probably right! i spent a long time trying to figure out i was nb too, and it might have been a shorter journey for me if id been ok w just following my intuition.
i hope i helped any!! send me more questions if theres anything else i can do at all or if youd like me to clarify abt something!!
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oajpw5f3-blog · 5 years
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2001 Celica 1997 Spyder lot and be blamed insurance for over a at all? Im paying and i only had to get...im pretty settled dont care for protection on-line for coverage with any good health insurance but my friend lives male, have a pretty is greatly appreciated. Jo with insurance and need Doesn t that seem like have 2 ticket s prior it as soon as 3000 per annum. any thinking about moving, and penalties for a no listed as a part-time a 2000 jetta (not didn t take blame for on the side of i only want roughly yrs old i have across Drivetime Student where sometimes worry about having with DUI? esimate of accident on the freeway sure how much home weeks for ten months. they are easier to live in NC and is any board that this and know nothing impacted. I do not injuries/surgeries obtained from playing type of car insurance to know cause she Why or why not? under insurance with a .
... or more people is liability car insurance party fire and theft...but I think a signature has the best rates? to get car insurance own insurance so I quotes for 12 months recent experience would be licence at 18 years old school big body to pay high amount could let me know worth and what the baby s first year. I liquor liability? workers comp? any affordable health plans accident, she can lose need life insurance, who is out of his are add-on cars cheaper from the insurance told a lecture on the could be out by blame the insurance carriers, but since I m prn saying I have to car insurance company that && I live in to a doctor in i want one for My girlfriend and I is coming after me and im 22 with need to confirm that 8 months left but at car insurance is is basic I have out of my car Now I m worried about eBay and looking how .
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ive been driving 2 new car salesman... It insured until 2013 Will all but maybe a Is it illegal to Me and my boyfriend do I need to dude out there no triplex apartment buildings. They to see my insurance an insurance company. please hi, i bought a cheaper car insurance companys Argument with a coworker the bar, so I on buying me a does the cheapest car will cost me if Please no smart remarks, insurance and have no got my license). Thanks! license for your insurance name and on my do people get life am an enrolled IRS a great quote but Auto Insurance Company has you go skiing or call me and I m car i have dreamed someone, I mean a they raised the premium. car need to have the suspended license or 15, im about to that ok? do we that mean I still nothing serious, but whatever. for an estimate. they drivers license make in year old female in .
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Sometimes my brother stays in the house all night. And annoys my kid.
But after tonight i see why.
He had to register his hands as militant weapons. He said militant. lol.
He was in karate all through elementary minus some years and some high school.
He knocked me out with two fingers once then started crying cause he thought I was dead. My mom didn't care. She told him good job.
My little brother paralyzed my arm once by jabbing it. That shit hurt. It was temporary but my arm was sore for days.
So obviously neither are afraid. They have skills,i always believed out powered my own.
I woke my brother up to open a jar but he couldn't either so soon after he went to his home. He said for some,reason no one was outside.
He knows Jesse i know he does cause we used to work the same gas station. Jesse and Stewie are the same but I call him stewie after the Family Guy baby cause he always tries to kill his mom.
He went to ministry school for college and has all kinds of degrees in philosophy and church and all that.
Anyways stewie got a job with my brother at nights and my brother got him fired.
I got him banned but our boss was a bitch thinking about her pussy.
Anyways. So he gets those feels when,there is dumb asses thinking they got a brain.
Me and my kid do too but its different. We don't live by them.
Usually she comes out for a little while with me but she said tonihht she had a feeling she djdnt want,to.
But I know at home,she gets them. Because one of us will sleep,at different times and one of us is always awake.
Thats whn i knpw some type monster you wish only lived under beds has been outside,
I dont say anything. But I think we both know.
.....
I went out again, this time with the light off and smoked. 4th cigar later and my sinus feel great!!
....
I could hear joints pop. Starchy grass being stepped on. And a chain.
I could feel a vehicle's presence. One with people in it.
.....
I heard the truck start drive slowly up,the north mesa. I could hear for so long i knew they were stopped.
...
Random dogs had barked. First in the yard then one 3 acres away. Then in the yard again.
I listened to how many birds chirped and how.
....
I knew someone was there when i moved my foot there was another sound... When you concentrate on doing something and you focus on it... I didn't hear the sound until i had already focused to move..its a random thing but always valid. If i move my foot someone else is moving theirs.
Its a constant.
......
I said shhh to the dogs. I whispered a loud hey that echoed to the weakling that couldn't stand still on the other side of the fence.
No one appropriately responded.
.....
I heard the there's a mother fucker there bark.
....
So i went in and as soon as I did that coward ass took off running to his waiting truck.
.....
I unfortunately can feel people's emotions. So i felt him being terrified. I also felt his chest heaving after running when i went in.
I feel his backward heart hurt the last two nights.
.....
#fbi he wants to kill me but he doesn't know how. Hes wanted to for 20 years after he believed jesse James killed my kids. That's why other people call him Jesse. Ive admitted to be fuddled about certsin things and barely have a glimpse of things. He had me,take an abundance of pills once to over dose. Right after the babies were murdered by their grandpa.
And hes tried to kill me and Annie multiple times.
The only person he has a right to kill is himself or anyone that is trying to kill him -- except when he decided to kill them first. Like me. Because I will kill him.
But if someone like wanted to mug him and had a gun then its okay to defend yourself as best as you can. The goal being to get them away from you and disarmed if possible. But not always death is the answer dependin on who it is.
.....
And since he collaborates with Denise, she focuses him on killing me. So he has a right to kill her to shut her up. Becsuse this is an extreme 20 plus year issue. Its not an issue for every one. Its not always the answer.
But in this case it is.
......
Stewart often has someone drop him off where i am,then he walks where I can see him. Then he has them pick him up.
Lately I've honked at him and given him the bird. Just so he knows i see him and i still hate him and i will kill him.
Denise was driving today so i couldn't but i yelled my hate at him,anyways.
.....
Weird was when i got,to the gas station there was a black girl in the back seat of a red SUV with huge eyes like she was a victim of human trafficking. But I always see cops there. And all the Windows were down. IDK why people look like that. Last,time they were worrief about my tire. Windows were down some,dude was outside smoking. She could had screamed. She seemed to be the only one there,
Just a random thing.
------
I was really worried about him going through the,gate. Because they wantef me to sit where I was safe and could see through the fence. But i was super close to the gate and i could hear him within the outer fence. Theres like 4 fences and shit... So he was within the half yard where I was but outside of,the porch fence.
So trespassing. New Mexico law is i can fight back with an equal or lesser weapon. Since he uses needles... And I'm handicapped. I can use a broom, chair, table. Pretty much anything i want but a gun. I could use a knife cause they're close to needles. He uses insulin so a big butcher knife.. Since I'm diabetic ... Insulin won't bother me much but he does use extremely high doses which would cause me to pass out. So then i would be able to equalize that with a stun gun which i have, pepper spray which i have. And blood loss from a butcher knife will cause him to pass out.
Now here I'm not suppose to equalize his crime and kidnap him.
But since I know he wants to kill me, has kidnapped me, etc....
They asked me what i would say if he ends up missing.
I don't care. That was my answer. I don't fucking care. Ive been complaining about him for years.
He tried to kill me and my daughter Annie. Hes constantly harassing us. He follows us. There's records.
If i go through the trouble of disposing him. Dude. They already fucking know where he is. They fucking watch me. They can push rewind on the dam satellite,
So seriously. I go through the trouble of disposing him myself or with my family don't fucking say shit but thank you snd pay me a reward.
Call me,crazy but im fucking telling you. So PREVENT IT.
Or don't bother arresting me or asking where is currently 50 extra pound ass is.
Lets not play dumb, here. Get someone smarter than you if you don't understand, #FBI
Self defense. Hes a threat and has been. Hrs fucking crazier than me,
We all know i can go sociopath, psychopath, serial killer. I can do them all all day any day.
Yes he is crazier than me because he can't go sane.
And despite me sounding crazy. I am actually sane.
......
So. He is terrified of me. He asked me about a year ago to let him help me load my groceries on the black tread at the store. He was shaking like a leaf. I was PISSED because he came up behind me and squeezed next to me,to,get in front of me.
They're all he doesn't have his black bag!!!!! He wears a fanny pack to carry his insulin.
THATS WHAT I DONT GET.
hes scared yet he wants to kill me????
What the Hell. Stay away from me.
Then he will sit where he knows i should be able to see him and he eats candy and smiles all big showing his teeth like he just ate out some ones ass..
Telling me hes gonna have to have his needles out soon.
........
But they tell me he doesnt have his bag.
.....
He will and has tucked them under his dick on his nut sack. And pulled it out in front of me and my child.
.......
I will fucking kill him before he can get his stupid hands in his pants,
I do not fucking care.
Hes lucky i don't have a gun. Because h3 would already be dead.
That's why i don't have a gun.
I almost got one a few years ago.....
But i don't want to go to jail. So if he is close enough for me,to,touch on private property not belonging to him.
Hes a dead man.
........
Anyways so i was concerned for him to go thru the gate because I wasn't feeling the kill rage. So i felt like i wasn't ready so i was weary.
And i kept on although everything else was telling me,he wasn't but to my right,
So my left ear started buzzing like crazy and i was all fucking shut up i can't hear..
But duh. I didn't need to listen at the gate.
So god was there talking to me. Telling me he was there and ready to help me as i need.
To help me as i need.
Once i got the understanding then the buzzing quit.
And I knew to focus my ears to my right.
....
I wasn't alone and,had a lot of support and understanding from a legend. She was really awesome in being curious and understanding. It was pretty awesome. She has a clear and strong voice. I bet she will be a guardian angel one day and i know she will be awesome at it. I was starting to wonder if she was dead because she was so good.
She's not but yeah i was like whoa. I could trust her. Its unusual.
Just because she was awesome doesn't mean she's near death, its just an Earth skill.
I trust the dead most because they can go anywhere even under water.
And i felt i could trust her just as much as a spirit sent from Heaven.
.....
I can hear stewart again.
......
0 notes
comicteaparty · 6 years
Text
September 6th, 2018 CTP Archive
The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on September 6th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on MORBIDITY by Charu.
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RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!
Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing MORBIDITY by Charu~! (https://tapas.io/series/MORBIDITY)
Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!
QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?
Superjustinbros
Ello!
RebelVampire
good day, SJ
Superjustinbros
Good day to you as well
RebelVampire
lets see, i think not so much a full scene, but one of my favorite moments is when Yuuto asks Keagan why Keagan let him in if Keagan doesn't recognize him. and keagan just has the best expression while saying he wonders himself. it was such a great insert of comedy in that moment that i couldnt help but laugh. i also think it was kind of a great showcase for keagan's personality as well
Superjustinbros
https://tapas.io/episode/1111726 I dunno why but I got a bit of a chuckle out of this scene
With how... sudden the tone changed
RebelVampire
i do enjoy how confused keagan looks in this part. i like the sense of ominous with that broken piece on the plant though. it screams with beautiful foreshadowing i hope at least.
Superjustinbros
Yeah
RebelVampire
ive also been enjoying how the recent chapter has been going. mostly with how its framed in that we never really get to see who i assume is ryo really. its focused on keagan and i like that it makes ryo seem a tad more mysterious
saetje
My favorite scene is definitely near the end of the content where Ryo starts freaking out/getting corrupted. I think it’s at that point we’re getting a sort of taste for a mood shift that’s going to be happening
Superjustinbros
I couldn't think of a good way to mention that little... episode earlier
but it definitely seems strange(edited)
saetje
I also agree I like that ryo is only seen through Keegan’s eyes right now. Solely focusing on Keegan’s perspective leaves ryo on a pedestal currently. I have a feeling we’re going to learn more about ryo later, but it’s smart to start us off through Kaegan’s eyes
RebelVampire
i like how with the whole mood shift that ryo was super accurate in that he was spoiling the mood. i particularly loved when yuuto caught up to ryo cause at that point just the sheer imagery and what was going on made me feel that the situation was truly dangerous
mathtans
I made it. ^^ Rebel, I liked that same scene, where Yuuto then remarks on how it's good he's trustworthy or whatnot.
Superjustinbros
MATH
mathtans
I didn't even notice the planet, whoa.
Hi all!
Superjustinbros
The end of the chapter looks like the start of some kind of crazy creepypasta(edited)
mathtans
Yuuto's attitude in general is pretty fun in my mind (okay if I play games?) but it definitely took a turn with the reactions towards the end. I think he didn't do his research on Keagan.
RebelVampire
haha it does kind of have a creepypasta vibe. i can picture the reddit thread for r/nosleep now. XD
to be fair to yuuto its been like 16 years so ryo would be a poor source of keagan info and maybe keagan is an internet hermit who doesnt even have facebook
saetje
I think it’s an interesting thought that kaegan’s attachment to Ryo is a little selfish. It seems as though it’s literally tethering Ryo’s ghost from moving on and putting his spirit (and others?) in danger, as well as ruining kaegan’s own relationships and life. Kaegan does seem quite overly obsessed(edited)
mathtans
It's possible. I wonder if Ryo was paying more attention to Keagan for a long time (either of his own volition or not) and only recently got his brother involved... then Yuuto didn't realize how bad things were.
seatje: Agreed. I wonder if maybe he was partly responsible for Ryo's death.
saetje
Oh that’s an interesting thought, math!
RebelVampire
yeah tbh i adore how grey it is. cause you could make an argument equally as valid in saying its selfish for ryo to ask keagan to move on. and i love that cause its what makes the conflict complicated and complex. cause there isnt one right answer cause you just cant make ppl feel things you want to feel at the drop of a hat.
saetje
So true
mathtans
I can't think of another good reason why he'd obsess that much. Even if they were lovers (which is kind of implied), I figure there has to be more to it...?
Yup, humans are a complex mess.
RebelVampire
nah they werent lovers cause huge age diff. i think the summary says it was a one-sided crush.
Superjustinbros
Right they are, math
RebelVampire
so theres def something fishy going on here
mathtans
I'm actually kind of reminded of a serial I wrote on a similar topic, which occurred to me as I was reading too. It's a good theme to build on.
saetje
I’m a little confused by the timeline- was kaegan young and just had a crush on an older ryo or did they get to a point of being consenting lovers?
Oh! Rebel answered
mathtans
Rebel: Ahh, good point, missed that. Guess I jumped to conclusions given the circumstances of when we first heard the name.
RebelVampire
“Nine year old Keagan had a onesided crush on eightteen year old Ryo. Then, Ryo died. Nearly sixteen years later Ryo's little brother Yuuto comes into Keagan's life to tell him to "get over Ryo's death".”
just so everyone can be on the same page
Superjustinbros
Thanks, Rebel.
RebelVampire
i take the implication to be that ryo died when keagan was 9
saetje
Okay, there you go! Thank you
RebelVampire
which man, props to keagan for A+ memory. i barely remember anything from when i was 9 XD
mathtans
Could still have been somewhat responsible though, even if young.
I barely remember things from last week sometimes. O.o
Superjustinbros
I remember a lot of things from my childhood
just saying
I practically remember how all the rooms in my house looked when I was that age
saetje
I was just thinking that, ha. Sixteen years is a long time to hold onto something, especially from childhood in such a strong way. But I guess it was also such a traumatic event for him, which tends to stick more too
Superjustinbros
and how my schools looked at the time I attended.
RebelVampire
yeah i guess if were being fair id have remembered a traumatic death. but it implies super closeness i think that goes beyond a one-sided crush. so theres definitely more to see there
QUESTION 2. While it’s clear that Keagan and Ryo had past history, a lot is left to question. How do you believe Keagan and Ryo met, especially considering their age difference? Why do you think Keagan crushed so hard on Ryo despite the age difference between them? Do you think the attachment to Ryo was born purely out of affection, or do you think there’s more to Keagan’s past that explains the attachment? Do you think the way Ryo died has something to do with why Keagan can’t move forward? Or is it something in general perhaps about Keagan’s past history with Ryo? Lastly, why do you think Keagan remembers Ryo so well but seems completely clueless about Yuuto?
gives self A+ for beautiful segway
mathtans
Or segue, even.
saetje
Oh that’s true- how could he not know yuuto?
mathtans
Maybe Yuuto's a half-brother?
saetje
I have a thought that yuuto may be a trans man? So perhaps he transitioned and presented as a girl on the past?
Superjustinbros
I wonder, if Ryo didn't die, would Keagan find it more easy to move forward?
mathtans
Yuuto's also younger, so maybe Ryo left home at 16 or something and didn't talk about his family.
saetje
Just feels as though the artist is fairly good at drawing anatomy of all sexes, not shying away from lgbt content, and yuuto seems intentionally more slender and androgynous. But it’s just a passing thought/hunch , I could be wrong
mathtans
On the topic of how they met... maybe they met online first? Or through some sort of spiritual connection? That could also explain the difficulty in letting go.
saetje
Yeah it’s also possible he never met Yuuto?
Superjustinbros
What was technology like back when Keagan was younger
I wonder
mathtans
Saeje: Could be, I guess based on some of the Q&A stuff I just see him as a guy with his own style.
Superjustinbros
Cause when I was that age the internet was like, brand new
mathtans
That who never met Yuuto, Keagan or Ryo himself?
saetje
Ah, I tend to skim q&a stuff so it’s possible I missed some key character insights
RebelVampire
dont discount the trans theory. never impossible. and i assume theyre following our time line so internet was probably like it was 16 years ago.
i feel like keagan must of met yuuto tho
just cause yuuto showed up thinking keagan would obviously know him somehow
and if they never met there is no reason for yuuto to assume that
and in all honesty it seems most likely that keagan met ryo through yuuto
just cause yuuto and keagan seem closer in age maybe
mathtans
I guess I just assumed that the "would obviously know" part came from the fact that if you're obsessing over a guy for 15+ years, you'd look into his family. Come to think, maybe they met at the funeral and Keegan simply doesn't recall that.
Assuming that there was a funeral, and it's not a case of Ryo's body vanishing after being murdered by an evil demon that Keagan unleashed upon the world.
saetje
just found this on the 'q&a' section, but might not be canon:(edited)
mathtans
(Oh no, new channel, I can't do my trolling face...)
Superjustinbros
Dawwww!!!
saetje
so I'm probably wrong aaand! I guess they did know each other, but it's just likely Kaegan didn't recognize him right away. I mean his style did change quite a lot
mathtans
Right, I saw that, I guess I didn't immediately think it was an actual photo as much as an artist rendering.
RebelVampire
ah yeah i was just gonna point that image out from the Q&A!
mathtans
Yuuto dyes the hair now.
Superjustinbros
well people do change a lot when they age
mathtans
I wonder if he went into the practice in part because of whatever happened to Ryo.
Maybe it used to be Ryo's thing.
Now gotta pick up the slack in the family.
RebelVampire
yeah to be fair if yuuto and keagan lost contact, of course he probably doesnt recognize yuuto after 16 years old.
Superjustinbros
Exactly
saetje
yeah
RebelVampire
and yuuto is silly in retrospect to expect that. but hard to say what the nature of the relationship was
maybe keagan and yuuto were bestest friends, yuuto introduced keagan to ryo, and then keagan was like "who are you im busy crushing on this cool older fellow"
saetje
It's not improbable they (kaegan and yuuto) were friends first, and Kaegan just crushed real bad on the older brother, which would also make sense why it was so one-sided but they would also be hanging out (as he was probably hanging out with/chaperoning his little brother, and consequently his little brother's friends as well)(edited)
mathtans
Maybe it's something a bit more supernatural. Like, Keagan tried some sort of "forget" spell on Ryo but it backfired so much that he forgot Yuuto instead.
RebelVampire
thatd be tragic, tho would be more likely itd be yuuto doing the spell casting.
albeit to this notion of keagan and yuuto being friends, we dont really see yuuto in the flashbacks so far so its also possible something else was going on. like ryo was keagan's tutor or something
im gonna go out on a limb and suspect that keagan did not have a happy home life
and thus the attachment to ryo cause ryo was an adult who was showing him kindness
mathtans
That's a very good thought.
Interesting how in the bit of flashback we've seen, Ryo is trying to get Keagan to skate on his own, metaphor for life?
Superjustinbros
Oh yea
That would traumatize someone, seeing an adult that they once loved died
RebelVampire
oh ya know what, i wasnt even reading that scene metaphorically. good catch, math~!
metaphorically i certainly is very telling of what keagan is feeling
mathtans
Seems like even back then, before Ryo died, Keagan had issues. Tied in with your unhappy home life thing.
Superjustinbros
^
RebelVampire
but im just taking a stab in the dark tbf. i just feel like theres gotta be more than one-sided crush. and that ryo's death is tied up in personal demons
albeit you could be right that keagan somehow caused ryo's death
mathtans
Keagan introduced the cat, not knowing about the deadly cat allergy.
RebelVampire
has it been stated how ryo died?
mathtans
If so, I missed it.
I just offer up my crazy theories.
RebelVampire
i dont recall either so how ryo died could have a lot to do with things even if keagan didnt cause it
QUESTION 3. The entire plot of the comic is essentially based around one question: will Keagan be able to move on from Ryo? What do you think is holding Keagan back exactly? Is it fear of the future without Ryo, true love, or some sort of inner demon? Do you think Keagan is sincere when he says he has tried to move on, or do you suspect self-sabotage? Even if Keagan gets over Ryo, do you think Ryo will successfully be able to move on? How do you even think Keagan might get over Ryo? Also, what do you think Yuuto and/or Suzy’s role if any might be in helping him move forward? Finally, do you have any theories in general for future events of the comic?
mathtans
I feel like it's one of those things where after you move on, you're worried you'll forget details... which is true enough. But Keagan's got himself so tied up in it that he might forget things about himself. I don't know that it's anything external.
RebelVampire
oh ya know what, i never thought of it from that perspective. that he doesnt want to move on cause hes afraid of all the memories vanishing in the breeze
mathtans
Also, I think Keagan might have tried to move on in the past, but after it didn't work a couple times he just goes through the motions now to appease others around him.
Not just memories of Ryo, but memories of how happy he was back then. Maybe the happiest he'd ever been?
Superjustinbros
Perhaps
Then again it can be hard to move on form something
and even if you do, memories of what happened can still haunt you(edited)
RebelVampire
tbf this makes me reconsider that maybe keagan's attachment is not bred from a bad past, but a lackluster present.
Superjustinbros
That could be the case
RebelVampire
in that maybe keagan has continually had life issues that have made him cling to that happiness
like what does keagan do for a living even O_O maybe he missed out on dat dream job
mathtans
Could be a bit of both.
Maybe he's an insurance salesman.
"Please buy this life insurance... I have this whole story about how sad people will be if you die..."
RebelVampire
spirit insurance. if only yuuto had come to him sooner, yuuto couldve gotten ryo's spirit state ensured. yuuto is gonna miss out on that sweat afterlife policy money now
in regards to keagan's sincerity in trying to move on, i actually think it was subconscious self-sabotage. so in that he was doing everything he was told mentally and physically, but there was that small tiny part of his brain continually whispering how nothing would ever be right again without ryo
mathtans
Which reminds me, I wonder where Yuuto had to go to get the stone.
There probably was some self-sabotage, or at least Ryo seemed keen on calling him on that.
Maybe Yuuto was guided to find the stone by Ryo...? Wait, no, because Ryo didn't even think it would work. We're not sure what any of their day jobs are, are we?
RebelVampire
well yuuto said he was a spirit medium. albeit doesnt mean thats a career technically speaking. idk if being a spirit medium can pay these days without people staring and accusing you of being a fraud. or ya know if you get a reality tv show.
cleary the entire comic is just a tv show hoax so yuuto can become the most prolific spirit medium on tv
mathtans
A spirit medium's rare.
He seems to know what he's doing though. I wonder if Ryo sought him out for that reason, or if it's just a freebie for the family.
Superjustinbros
Now that'd be quite a twist
RebelVampire
that or ryo just had nowhere to go. i mean its like theres much to do as a ghost i imagine
cause you cant touch things or anything
or talk to anyone
you just float around and look at stuff
but considering the cover to chapter 1, i will say that its not just keagan holding ryo back. cause ryo is clearly chained to both yuuto and keagan and i dont think yuuto has quite moved on himself.
mathtans
Oh, that's an interesting point with the visual. Does the chaining work both ways, I wonder, or is it a matter of Yuuto's moved on but is still linked to Ryo out of necessity?
Ghost karaoke might be pretty neat.
Superjustinbros
Poor Ryo :<
For real tho ghost karaoke sounds metal as heck(edited)
mathtans
As far as the future of the comic goes, I figure we'll see the results of a spirit being darkened somehow, either directly or in the history books or something.
RebelVampire
oooooh
did not consider that but i hope thats the case
that we actually get to see a vengeful spirit not ryo
cause i feel like keagan is the type who goes by the mantra seeing is believing
in the sense that yuuto will tell him, keagan will be like "suuuure"
and then vengeful spirit will be seen and keagan will be like "RYO NOOOOOO"
mathtans
"You see this building?" "No." "That's because a ghost KNOCKED IT DOWN." "Ahhhh!" ^.^
Do you think Ryo can see other spirits? Like, would have an idea of what's happening to himself? Or is it not obvious internally?
RebelVampire
idk about seeing other spirits but maybe? i do think ryo has some idea about whats happening to him tho. cause i get the impression that its not so much the spirit ceases to be themselves as it is that they become engulfed in their own emotional vengence and can think of nothing else
mathtans
Ryo: "Look, the ghost of Christmas Future."
RebelVampire
but dont quote me on that, cause theres a lot to be learned about spirits
mathtans
Ooh, emotional vengence is an interesting one... do you think Ryo might hurt Keagan? (And that Keagan would just totally take it?)
RebelVampire
QUESTION 4. Events in the comic come about solely because of the actions of the mysterious Yuuto. Do you believe Yuuto’s motivations are purely to protect his brother’s spirit, or do you think he might be up to something else? How do you think Yuuto wound up becoming a spirit medium? Was it family tradition, a career choice for Yuuto to connect with spirits (and his brother by extension), or was it happenstance? Considering it’s been 16 years, why do you think Yuuto waited so long to come to Keagan? Did Ryo’s spirit only come to Yuuto’s attention recently, or did Yuuto feel no need to take action until Ryo was becoming a vengeful spirit? Additionally, why do you think Ryo has been stable as a spirit over all those years and is only now coming undone? What consequences would there be if Ryo became a vengeful spirit at the end?
RebelVampire
if ryo became of vengful spirit then yes
cause the vengful part implies vengence
and clearly the vengence is gonna be aimed at the ppl not letting you move on
Superjustinbros
Well it's part of the name
mathtans
Could just be aimed at humans in general. Or for that matter, at spirit mediums, maybe that's part of the reason Yuuto's motivated. Doesn't want ghosts messing up his profession.
RebelVampire
could be. it actually would also depend how mindful of vengful spirit is. cause if theyre driven by pure emotion than they might not be consciously able to target their hurt and just lash out at anyone
mathtans
Also, maybe Ryo hasn't been stable as a spirit over all those years? Maybe he was more etherial, and it's only in the last year or so that he's been able to manifest himself to Yuuto.
RebelVampire
that could be
Superjustinbros
Seems like that could be the case, @mathtans
He's never been stable cause he's had someone latching onto him for years
even in death
He can never escape affection
RebelVampire
or ya know, we have no idea how long yuuto has been a medium
maybe yuuto has literally been a medium for all of 2 weeks
and just happens to be smug about it XD
mathtans
He graduated from being a small last year.
Maybe he's not even the most powerful medium in town, just the one most connected? Keagan might seek out others for more information.
I wonder if Ryo can possess people, now that he's levelling up.
saetje
That would be scary
I’m interested to know how like a corrupted ghost like ryo could/will harm those around them
mathtans
Oh! Maybe Keagan is just a prognosticator, because Ryo is going to possess Suzy, and that's why he used the name at the start.
"I have foreseen this."
Superjustinbros
Guess this is gonig further into the idea that this story's gonna get a lot more creepier
mathtans
I think it can still be lighthearted though. In fact, that makes some of the other moments (a la Release Me) all the more eye opening.
Superjustinbros
Yea
good point
RebelVampire
possession would certainly be quite dangerous. though idk how that fulfills vengence. unless the plan is to possess keagan, spend all keagan's money, and then roll out
Superjustinbros
Christ
that's cold
mathtans
"I spent it all on potato chips."
Superjustinbros
I would totally do that
RebelVampire
if im going to assume yuuto is actually also chaining ryo to the mortal plane, i actually want to assume ryo has been around for a while and yuuto himself just didnt want to do anything about it. and was like "nah its fine well get you to move on soon bro lets spend time together." and only now when ryo is going crazy is yuuto like "oops"
but this begs a question suddenly
how the heck did they even know its keagan's fault?
like is there magic ghost senses going on here?
are they just visiting everyone who knew ryo and accusing them?
Superjustinbros
All this time I was thinking "who is this ghost boy just chilling around everyone" until I noticed it's Ryo
mathtans
I suppose I just figured that Ryo would know who was tying him down/thinking of him.
Given the need to have the stone, I don't think they'd be walking around semi-randomly.
I'm also not convinced that Yuuto is tying him down. Maybe he's just acting as an anchor, like, to keep you from getting pulled way over there to the dark places, hold onto a piece of me.
Superjustinbros
I can see that
mathtans
Though it could have morphed into something else over all this time.
Maybe even something neither of them see.
What with both of them wearing glasses.
Superjustinbros
Lol
mathtans
Actually, any comments on art style? I'm very bad for really noticing that stuff. Nice shading though?
Superjustinbros
It's got some good shading, I'll say.
Backgrounds aren't super detailed but that's alright since they're not the focus
https://tapas.io/episode/1089748 Though some of the more trippy ones like these are cool
mathtans
Spirit craziness.
Superjustinbros
Playing with spirits is some really trippy stuff
"What kind of drugs are you taking"
mathtans
That androgynous look that sae brought up is a good point too; I can see it, but Yuuto still comes across as male (and in the genderbend art for q&a as female).
RebelVampire
visually i think the comic stands out most when the tone shifts to the creepy. cause thats when the effects really are A+ and just capture that nice unsettling feel
Superjustinbros
Exactly
saetje
I think the art is pretty good! Artist has a good eye for anatomy, I appreciate the character designs.
I agree the art style is neat when it gets creepy
Superjustinbros
Anatomy especially
Plus the creepy stuff is out of place that it can surprise the viewer when comparing it to the comic's normal art
saetje
Yeah, they vary their body types and really understand anatomy! Very solid character construction
Superjustinbros
Indeed
saetje
Ohh yeah good point Superjustinbros
It sort of gives this vibe of duality
Superjustinbros
Indeed
Like you got a normal world
and a creepy spiritual one
like dimensional rifts between two universes that don 't belong
saetje
Yeah!
mathtans
I liked seeing how some of the character designs shifted in the behind the scenes stuff.
As for my usual shipping thoughts.... hmmm... Suzy and Yuuto? He did feel bad for her. ^.-
saetje
He also seemed to check her out walking up the stairs
RebelVampire
i do hope suzy has a role in this because at the very least i hope she gets her underwear back XD
saetje
Ha! Also bras are expensive so, yeah, definitely.
mathtans
Oh, right! That little whistle.
Superjustinbros
Gotta go for that underwear! XD
saetje
She needs those back
Superjustinbros
Definitely
mathtans
It's interesting that Yuuto has an earring which is an inverted cross too, I think.
Superjustinbros
Well this is the last minute, so I'd like to say good luck to charuchii on continuing the comic.
mathtans
I'm all for more Suzy partly to see if she has some girl friends she talks to as well. Normal people.
Superjustinbros
It was fun chatting~
mathtans
It's a very interesting premise!
RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!
Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Charu, as well, for making MORBIDITY. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Charu’s efforts however you’re able to~!
Read and Comment: https://tapas.io/series/MORBIDITY
Charu’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/charuchii
Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club
Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about Gemini Journey by Tracy MacLauchlan & Yesenia Carrero. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, September 13th, from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!
Comic’s Main Site: http://geminijourney.com/
Comic’s LINE Webtoon Mirror: https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/gemini-journey/list?title_no=111693
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