#hot mail com

[kenzie-ann27]

you know what, I'm just gonna say it

sex scenes are lazy ways to show intimacy

#a real hot take here #especially on tumblr dot com #this might just be an asexual thing but even as an adult i just cannot stand sex scenes #what do they accomplish that poetry and kisses cannot #sex in general feels like such a lazy way to show affection too #never in my life have i watched once sex scene and been like 'yes this is necessary' #anyway #personal #delete later when i get flooded with hate mail

[sorchathered]

You’re still the one💙

Pairing- Robert “Bob” Floyd x reader

Warnings- language, a little bit smutty, angst with lots of pining and longing.

Summary- Bob’s come back to his small town in Georgia for his best friends wedding, will their plan to bring him back together with his high school sweetheart work out? Or will it end in more heartache?

When Bob had gotten the wedding invite in the mail he’d been so thrilled, truly. His best friend Sam had done the impossible, made the long distance work through college and grad school and now finally he was marrying his high school sweetheart Millie. He was happy for them, really he was. The only thing that could’ve been better is if he was sharing this with you. This was supposed to be the two of you, conquering your goals and then winding up together, but it hadn’t worked out the way either of you planned and it had been longer than Bob knew since he’d seen your face.

Millie had asked if your old band from high school would reunite for the wedding music and you’d been over the moon, a few of you had continued to play together and occasionally doing a gig or two just for old times sake, knowing that she wanted you involved in her special day made your heart swell.

The closer the date got the more dread seemed to settle in your bones, you’d stalked Bob’s socials and sneakily asked if he was bringing a date, but the look Sam had given you when he said Bob was coming alone let you know he knew exactly what you were hoping. Maybe he didn’t have someone waiting for him in California, maybe he had even asked about you, and for the first time in almost 6 years you let yourself hope.

In his lonely little apartment in Coronado Robert Floyd was doing about as well as you. He’d thought of nothing but you since that invitation showed up in his mail, hell that was a lie; he spent most nights thinking of you if he was truly honest with himself. He was sure Sam and Millie were already plotting some elaborate scheme to push the two of you together over the wedding celebration and he had to laugh at their dedication. He still wasn’t sure how things had gotten so screwed up. Long distance had been hard, deployments, work schedules and midterms seemed to keep the two of you from ever being able to make concrete plans and eventually it felt like you two had just grown apart too much for repair.

He should’ve fought harder, any attempts to move on over the years had been a complete disaster because how was he supposed to find someone new when he was still hung up on you? Natasha always loved to pick on him about it, that one day he’d have to move on or would have to have his “rom com moment” as she called it and sweep you back off your feet but Bob figured you’d long forgotten about him by now. If he only knew that you’d been just as hung up as he was, but neither of you had been brave enough to reach out.

The wedding festivities were in full swing this week, Millie had sent you the final list of songs she wanted for the wedding and you had added a few crowd favorites as well. You missed the days of jamming with your friends, being a music teacher was so rewarding and it had been everything you’d dreamed it would be, but you couldn’t deny that you were looking forward to getting to let loose with old friends.

You were in full nostalgia mode by the time the weekend of the wedding, thinking of all the things you’d had planned for yourself way back when. You’d had your whole wedding planned out, you knew it had been silly but you’d dreamed of a party with all your friends and at the center of it the boy you’d loved since you were a little girl. Deep in the recesses of your parents attic was a hot pink sparkly notebook from senior year with a list of songs you wanted for your own wedding day, gel pen rainbow font with little cursive scribbles of Mrs. Robert Floyd and hearts doodled all over the page. But that had been another lifetime ago, and just the thought of how much time had changed you both brought tears to your eyes.

Bob was so glad to be back home, it had been ages, his mother was already fussing about how he needed to eat more and catching him up on all the town gossip. He wanted to ask about you, but she beat him to the punch; gushing about the musical the middle school was putting on and how hard you were working to make it a success. It looked like all your dreams had come true, you were doing what you loved, but his mama could see the far off look in his eyes as she spoke, she knew all too well what he was feeling.

“You should call her you know, I have her number if you want it.” She’d said softly as she touched his hand but he couldn’t look her in the eyes. “Oh Mama, too much time has passed, I’m sure she’s got someone who could treat her way better than me.” She patted his hand lovingly and shook her head, “Sweet boy, there were never two people better suited for one another than the two of you. I don’t think she ever moved on, I know you didn’t. You know…she lives in the old Macon house on Water Road, not too far if you wanted to take a walk.”

“Mama! “ he said harshly but his features didn’t match his tone at all, he was trying his best not to laugh at her persistence.

She put her hands up and laughed, “I’m just saying, the night air might do you some good. After all life is too short sweetheart.” He thought of his father, taken from them too soon and how his mother had never found anyone else. He’s been her everything, Bob had always thought that would be the same with the two of you.

She heads up for the evening and he’s left alone with his thoughts again. Her house isn’t that far, maybe 5 minutes, and it’s only 8 pm on a Friday she would probably still be awake…

Before he can really mull it over he’s slipping on his shoes and heading out the door, feet carrying him down the sidewalks and past the quaint antebellum style houses illuminated in the orange glow of the street lights until he finds himself at your door. He’s warring with himself about knocking, what the hell was he doing? He’d barely spoken to you in almost 6 years, this was stupid he should’ve never done this. As he turns away to walk down the porch steps he hears the lock click and turning of the door handle, light illuminating the porch as you poke your head out into the night.

“Robby? Is that you?” You say quietly, a small smile on your lips as you look him over with eager eyes. Time had been good to you, he’d always thought you were the most beautiful girl on earth and that certainly hadn’t changed. You weren’t a young girl anymore, your figure was all curves, he couldn’t help but tighten his fists thinking about running his hands over your voluptuous body. Snap out of it Floyd, get your shit together, he thought as you looked at him with confusion evident on your face.

“Well? You gonna come in? Your mama told me you were coming by, I’ve just been sitting by the window listening out for you.” You said as you opened the door a little wider for him to step through. “Of course she did” he muttered, shaking his head with a dark chuckle, leave it to Susan Floyd to take things into her own hands.

You raised an eyebrow at him as he continued to stand awkwardly in the doorway, “I can’t really read your faces anymore Floyd, do you want to come in or are we gonna let all the bugs into my house tonight?” Hands on your hips, sassy remark, yep you were still every bit the spitfire he remembered, that take no shit attitude clearly hadn’t gone anywhere.

“Yeah, yeah y/n I was coming by, sorry I just…I had an idea in my head of what I was gonna say and now here I am and I’ve got nothing.” He said sheepishly as he ran a hand over the back of his neck. You reached for the hand at his side and pulled him through the doorway, closing the door and scooting him in the direction of the couch. Bossy. As always.

“How about I get you a glass of sweet tea and we get all the awkward small talk out of the way, or we could just skip it if you want? I’ve been keeping up with your life through your mom but if you’ve got questions I’m happy to answer them.” You said as you shuffled down the hall to the little kitchen, Bob plopping himself down on your ridiculously comfy velvet couch. “You keep up with me?” He said in shock, he never would’ve thought you’d give him a second thought after he let everything crash and burn, maybe his mama had been right to push him this way.

“Of course I do, it’s not every day you get to be in the top 1% in your field, especially with a job like yours. I’ve always cheered you on, just didn’t think you’d ever show up here, kinda figured you’d forgotten all about me.” You said as you placed down a Mason jar of sweet tea and a tin of shortbread cookies, you’d said it so nonchalantly but he could see in your eyes the hurt was still there.

“I’ve kept up with you too, I- uh I’ve looked at your instagram, and Millie of course updates me when I ask, even if she is still pissed at me about how things ended. You uh- you look like you got everything you wanted in your career too. Mama said the school play is gonna be a big success. I know you’ve gotta be thrilled.”

You nodded, just bringing up your students brought the light back into your eyes. “They are the best, I thought it’d be weird teaching at our old school but truly it is such a joy. These kids love music, it’s so much fun watching them show off their creativity. And as for Millie…Well I’m pretty sure she and Sam have some elaborate plan to “accidentally” trap us in a closet together tomorrow until we work everything out. They’ve been oddly sneaky lately.” You laugh out, and Bob can’t help but join in, they definitely weren’t subtle but you could both agree they were damn good friends.

You both laughed and talked for hours, going through the whole tin of cookies as you caught up on each other’s lives, somewhere in the early morning hours you had fallen asleep with your head on his shoulder and Bob felt his heart stutter in his chest as he looked down at you. He’d missed this, just being with you.

You had been his favorite person for his entire childhood, how did he let things get so out of hand? It couldn’t be comfortable being propped up like that, so Bob carefully pulled you into his arms and carried you to your room. It was nearly 4 am, he would just crash on your couch like a gentleman should and make an excuse to bail when he woke up. Laying you on the bed he made to step away but you curled your fist into his shirt, murmuring “stay with me” as you pulled him closer, and how could he possibly tell you no? He toed off his shoes and slid in next to you, falling asleep to the sounds of your breathing and warm body pressed to his.

He couldn’t place where he was when he woke up, just that it smelled like coffee and pancakes and somehow he’d slept in. Upon opening his eyes it all came back to him, how you’d asked him to stay and he’d fallen asleep in your arms, he felt hot all over just thinking about it, anxiety filling his chest as he worried about how to navigate the sure to be awkward morning after conversation. Again he wondered how they’d gotten so far from where they’d begun; but one thing hadn’t changed, holding you had simply brought it all back. The feelings he had never wavered, and he was fairly sure he was even more smitten with you now after catching up than he had been before.

You were dancing around in the kitchen as you cooked, spatula acting as a microphone while Fleetwood Mac played from your phone. Clad in a tattered t-shirt and pajama shorts from the night before with your hair messily piled on your head. There was that feeling again, the heat blooming in his chest and the butterflies he’d never felt for anyone but you. It nearly knocked the wind out of him. You couldn’t be more beautiful to him than you were in this moment, he wished he could burn it into his brain forever.

You spun around to the beat but jumped almost a foot in the air when you noticed him, clutching your chest as giggles erupted from you both. “Oh! Oh my god Robby you scared the hell out of me! Did’ya sleep ok? Want breakfast?” You said gesturing behind you to the steaming pile of pancakes and bacon, he wanted breakfast for sure but he knew one thing he wanted more than that.

He crowded you up against the stove, leaning behind you to cut the burner off as he looked down at you with a small smile. “Breakfast sounds good, sweet girl, but we need to talk first.”

“Uh huh” you said and he could tell he had the same dizzying effect on you, that was good, he was hoping this wasn’t one sided.

“I had more fun with you last night than I’ve had in years, and I can’t think of why we ever stopped doing this in the first place. Well a reason that actually counts anyways. I know it’s sudden, hell you probably have a line out the door hoping for a date but-“

“Yes!” You blurted out, nodding your head as you abandoned the spatula and gripped the back of his neck to pull his lips to yours.

You’d meant it to be sweet, just a peck to let him know you wanted the same things he did, but it had been so long, and no one had ever made you feel like he did. It got heated fast, muscular arms wrapped around your waist pulling you in so tight that nothing to get between you, hands in his hair as his kisses became more urgent, opening his mouth to you as you moaned softly into his, and the noise seemed to flip a switch as he hoisted you up in his arms and carried you back down the hall to your bedroom.

It was as sweet and smooth as molasses, he unwrapped you like a present as you tugged at his clothes, you wanted him as bare as you were. He eagerly obliged, tossing his shirt and jeans somewhere across your room as he climbed back into bed and pressed you into the mattress.

“Y/n I-“

“I know baby, I feel it too. Make love to me Robby.”

And so he did, again and again until the two of you felt boneless, breakfast long forgotten and morning seeping into early afternoon.

You’d fallen asleep in his arms around one, and he knew he’d have to wake you up soon to get ready for the wedding and go home to get his suit. He just wanted to stay wrapped up in this a little longer, as much as he needed this to be real again he also knew there was so much red tape. You lived on the opposite coast from him, your career was thriving and you’d never moved away from home. He couldn’t ask you to pack away your life and move every 3-4 years with him. Distance had been what broke you apart last time, he didn’t know if he could bear losing you a second time.

When you finally stirred around 2 you popped up in a panic, you were alone in bed and it was clearly later in the day than you had expected it to be. A sick feeling washed over you, had you interpreted everything wrong? Where was he? Did he regret it and bail?

The sound of a door opening broke you from your thoughts, heavy footfalls down the hallway let you know he hadn’t actually left. He caught your watery eyes looking at him from the doorway and rushed forward to cradle you in his arms, swiping at the tears before they could fall.

“What’s going on it that head of yours? You ok?” He said as he rubbed soothing hands against your back.

“It’s stupid, I woke up alone and I thought..” you stopped and then looked up at him sheepishly. “I thought you’d left” you said with a whisper, cheeks tinged pink with embarrassment.

“Oh. Aw Shit. I mean I did leave, but for just a minute to grab us some lunch and my suit for tonight, I’m sorry baby I should’ve left a note.” He looked a little embarrassed as well, he was very clearly out of practice when it came to having a partner.

“Ugh, we’re a mess aren’t we?” You chuckled out as you buried your head in his neck, he just nodded as he continued to hold you, he still didn’t know what this was but god he didn’t want to lose it.

“We probably need to figure all of this out y/n, I don’t want to pop the bubble but I can’t shut my brain off. I want this, all of it with you. I’m scared I’m gonna ruin it again.” He was grateful that you couldn’t see his face, he didn’t know if he could keep himself from falling apart if you could.

“We’ll do whatever it takes.” You pulled back to cup his cheeks so he was looking in your eyes. “We were young and stupid back then, but we can do this now. I know we can. If I have to pack up and head to California I will, I’m not saying it won’t be hard but it’s worth it.”

He fucked you slow and steady under the hot spray of the shower after that, worshipping every bit of you and definitely making you both late.

The two of you scrambled to get to the venue, making it right on time, Sam giving Bob a knowing look at his disheveled appearance when he burst into the groom's suite. When you stopped into the bridal suite to check on Millie, she made sure to pick on you for the hickey you’d tried to hide under your ear. Clearly the plan had worked, maybe not how they’d thought but the result was what they were after. You’d have to send his Mama flowers on Monday for her meddling, she’d known what was best even when the two of you didn’t.

The ceremony was beautiful, full of tears and love and Bob couldn’t help but let his eyes drift over to you, he already had plans swirling in his head of wedding rings and a future he’d thought was long lost. After you sang for the reception the band took over and Bob twirled you around the dance floor for much of the evening, he would hold these moments close until he could get you back in his arms again. It had been the perfect weekend.

A few months later you both were carrying moving boxes into his little townhouse, a new job all lined up at the local middle school and the entire summer to spend by the beach with your boyfriend. Everything had fallen into place, and if the little ring box in Bob’s back pocket had anything to do with it, he’d soon be calling you Mrs. Floyd.

🏷️ Tagging- @mamamaystbr @mamachasesmayhem @attapullman @bobgasm @sailor-aviator @roosterforme @sebsxphia @floydsglasses @sarahsmi13s @bradshawssugarbaby @hangmansgbaby

#top gun maverick #top gun maverick fanfiction #bob floyd #robert bob floyd #bob floyd smut #bob floyd x reader #robert floyd #robert floyd x reader #robert floyd x you #robert bob floyd x reader #robert bob floyd x you #bob floyd x you

[calicoheartz]

Paige Bueckers : headcannons ഒ ¸ ⊹

warning : none ! pure fluff :)

a/n : hey guys! welcome to my first real post! today I decided to write some super niche headcannons about PB ◡̈ enjoy !

︵︵︵︵︵︵︵︵︵︵

⸝⸝ ♡ despite her tough exterior , Paige secretly adores handwritten letters and often leaves little notes for her s/o to find throughout the day! almost always expressing her love and appreciation for them in little or subtle ways

⸝⸝ ♡ Definitely has a soft spot for rainy days. Whenever it storms , she loves the idea of cozying up with you under a blanket , sipping hot cocoa or tea while expressing her dreams , fears , and deepest thoughts with you !

⸝⸝ ♡ Paige FOR SURE has a secret playlist filled with songs that remind her of you, and whenever you guys are apart, they listen to it to feel closer to you. Maybe even leaving voice memos of her expressing her love for you between the tracks

⸝⸝ ♡ She is incredibly attentive to her partners needs and ALWAYS knows how to make them feel special, whether it’s through a surprise gift, a comforting embrace, or just by simply being there to support them through difficult times

⸝⸝ ♡ I feel like Paige would believe in grand romantic gestures and she isn’t afraid to go above and beyond to sweet her partner off their feet. Whether it is a surprise weekend getaway, a heartfelt love letter , or a spontaneous dance in the moonlight. Her love has no bounds, and she’s always striving to make her partner feel cherished and adored

⸝⸝ ♡ our girl is definitely a hopeless romantic

⸝⸝ ♡ yall definitely have a secret handshake that yall share whenever either of you need a pick-me-up or a reminder of your special bond :) it’s a playful gesture that symbolizes your unique connection !

⸝⸝ ♡ I also feel like she’s a sucker for rom-coms, especially the ones from the 90s. Her all time favorite is DEFINITELY “you’ve got mail” go argue with a wall 😊

⸝⸝ ♡ I hc her love language to be a mix of physical touch and acts of service. I feel like while she loves having you near her and is almost always craving your touch; she also loves going out of her way to do thoughtful things for you. Whether it’s cooking your favorite meal, or getting you something you’ve wanted for awhile, best believe your girl is always thinking of you!

⸝⸝ ♡ (going off the previous headcannon) I feel like she’s the type to want to hold your hand literally anywhere and everywhere! I think she’d intertwine your pinkies in public, or maybe caress your hand while walking together in public! She loves making it obvious that she’s yours ◡̈

anywhooo that is it for today! lmk if you guys would like a pt 2 or possibly a nsfw version of this? thank u for reading !

#paige bueckers #paige bueckers x reader #wcbb #wcbb x reader #uconn wbb #wlw post #wlw #wlw imagine #headcannons #my hcs

[monsteraficionado]

So, are you new to Watcher?

Whether you just discovered the dudes from Buzzfeed Unsolved premiered a new ghost hunting show or you stumbled across Ghost Files without having ever seen Ryan and Shane before, perhaps you find yourself a bit lost regarding Watcher.

So here I present a not-quite-short (yet I hope comprehensive) guide to Watcher Entertainment!

What is Watcher?

Back in 2019, three ex-BuzzFeed employees (Ryan Bergara and Shane Madej from BuzzFeed Unsolved and Steven Lim from Worth It) joined forces and announced they were launching a new production company and YouTube channel called Watcher. They toiled at it for an entire year and their new channel premiered on January 10th, 2020 with seven shows, the first of which was Puppet History (but more on the shows later).

They started with a grand total of five employees: the three cofounders, Brittney Lee (Production Supervisor) and Anthony Frederick (Creative Director of Post Production). Now, Team Watcher has grown to include several more people, including some ex-BuzzFeeders like Katie LeBlanc (who used to produce BFU and Worth It, today is Head of Development at Watcher), Annie Jeong (who you may know from Worth It and the Berry Boys video featuring Ryan and Shane, now a Senior Creative Producer) and Mark Celestino (cameraman for BFU, now Senior Creative Producer at Watcher).

Currently, Watcher presents a new episode of whichever show it's currently in season (right now it's Ghost Files of course) every Friday at 12 PT. Between shows, or sometimes on Wednesdays, they might air One-Offs, which are smaller, well, one off videos. Over at their Patreon you can find more content including:

Early Thursday access for Friday videos

Watcher Weekly+, a weekly talk show featuring any combination of cofounders and/or Watcher crew, where they answer fan questions and sometimes open fan mail. NOTE: for a taste of these, you can refer to their now-extinct Watcher Weekly show, formerly airing on Wednesdays over at YouTube dot com.

For higher tiers, a monthly livestream also featuring any combination of cofounders where they shoot the shit for an entire hour

Also for higher tiers, audio commentaries for select episodes

And for the highest tier, Discord AMAs with different members of Team Watcher.

Onto the shows:

Watcher has many shows. A whole lot of them. Ryan, Steven and Shane are very creative guys and it shows. When they first started, they began with a new episode of a different show every week, which was for some people very confusing. They've settled into airing whole seasons now, so after we're done with the premiere season of Ghost Files, we'll move onto a new season of Puppet History and then onto another show.

Because it's so many shows, I'll only describe the ones that are still being produced, along with the shows that premiered for the first time in 2022, in chronological order.

Puppet History

Helmed by Shane Madej, this was the first show that appeared on Watcher and the host, a puppet named The Professor (played by Shane) has become the de facto mascot of Watcher. If you liked the Hot Daga and Ruining History, this is essentially its spiritual successor. Here, The Professor leads Ryan and a different guest through a journey of a wacky historical event, while they compete to see who will become History Master. The lore gets really deep.

Top 5 Beatdown

A Ryan Bergara concoction, Shane and Ryan debate asinine topics ranging from the hottest Disney cartoon characters to top dog breeds, comparing top 5 lists and often fighting about it. When they do not fight, the duo showcases their one shared braincell. In every episode, they have a guest who knows more about the topic than them.

Are You Scared?

Also created by Ryan Bergara, Are You Scared? began as a Zoom show and evolved to being shot in person after pandemic restrictions eased. Ryan tells Shane one of the spookiest stories from the internet, and they both laugh over it. In a way, the format is similar to Unsolved, and the promotion campaigns for it are hilarious: once, Ryan pretended he'd been kidnapped by The Professor and made an entire photo shoot about it.

Too Many Spirits

From the galaxy brain of Katie LeBlanc, this was the first show shot in person during the pandemic, and also the only Friday show to feature all three co-founders. Ryan and Shane gather in a backyard to read ghost stories submitted by fans, but they get drunker and drunker every episode. They start off very normal, but by the fourth and last episode of each season, they are absolutely unhinged. By the way, the drinks? Handmade by Steven Lim himself, who turns out, is a (not) wonderful bartender. In the most recent seasons, we get an actual professional bartender, Ricky Wang, who has a very special working relationship with Steven.

Dish Granted

Created by and for the suffering of Steven Lim, Dish Granted is about love and food and friends. In each episode, Steven sets out to grant a friend of his their dream dish, even if it costs Steven his own sanity. Currently, the episode with Simu Liu holds the honor of being the Watcher video with most views. I love it, and you should too.

Worth a Shot

In each episode of this show hosted by Ricky Wang (of Too Many Spirits fame), he creates a special cocktail for a different guest. Ricky definitely knows what he is doing, and so, this show has a very soothing quality to it.

Eat Like Me

Also made by Steven Lim. Join Steven as he learns more about different cultures and/or lifestyles as he eats for one day as someone else. In the pilot season, he discovered the joys of the diet of a Korean college student, the woes of British people, and the pain of a professional eating competitor.

Pretty Historic

Created by Selorm Kploanyi and directed by none other than Sara Rubin, Pretty Historic looks at history from another point of view: beauty and makeup. It is an incredibly pretty show, the aesthetics are top notch, and it dives into really interesting subjects. I am begging for y'all to watch this.

Ghost Files

Finally, Ghost Files doesn't really need an introduction. Ryan Bergara's baby, the official successor to BuzzFeed Unsolved, and in the words of Shane Madej (to which I subscribe wholeheartedly), the perfect ghost hunting show. Only an episode and it's corresponding Debrief have been released until now, but it's so good. So different from BFU in a much, much better way, while still feeling incredibly familiar. Wow. The Ghoul Boys have done it for real.

However, Watcher has a vast catalogue with even more shows than those, plus all of their one-offs. My personal favorites and recommendations to you are Weird and/or Wonderful World (with Shane and Ryan) and Homemade (hosted by Steven). Homemade particularly feels like a work of art that I don't feel gets appreciated as much as it should.

Also, I greatly recommend watching Ryan and Shane Eat Everything Boysenberry (Again): Bless Annie for doing this for us. Berry Boys 2, once again taking off at Knott's Berry Farm.

So where can I keep up with Watcher?

If you aren't following them in at least one of their social media accounts, you might want to do that:

Their YouTube official channel

Tumblr

Twitter

Instagram

TikTok

Patreon

Finally!

These are the bare essentials to getting into Watcher, but I hope it's useful to at least one person. If you have any questions, ask away! Imo, the fandom is incredibly nice and would love to help any newbie find their way through.

#watcher #ryan bergara #shane madej #steven lim #ghost files #buzzfeed unsolved #puppet history #dish granted #are you scared #too many spirits #this is an attempt at a primer #i DO hope someone does find it useful #and ends up diving into all the content watcher has for you #their quality content we've all come to expect from them is really fun! nice! extremely worth it!! #Youtube

[inklore]

spellblind

premise: there’s a long list of reasons why peter should ignore the dark thoughts in his head, but none of those reasons gets him you.

pairing: dark!peter parker x bestfriend!reader

word count: 1.7k

warnings: eighteen+ content, noncon, this is dark as hell so please mind the tags babes, hypnotism, unprotected p in v, creampie, au since spider man don’t got hypno powers but also this is set after no way home, slight obsessed!peter, one sided love, oral sex, marking, mentions of captivity.

etc: this is my first time writing for mcu!peter and i made it dark and messed up, this is shocking to no one lmaosjsj.

kinktober 04 | kinktober masterlist

There’s a part of Peter that knows this is wrong—a section of his brain that is waving red flags and flashing lights telling him to stop, to not let anything go as far as where the dark recesses of his mind are tempting him to.

He’s Peter Parker. The friendly neighborhood spider-man, he should know better—does know better. Was taught right from wrong and always does the right thing. Always stays on that path of golden behavior even when it lands him with blood and bruises, or flat on the concrete.

He’s always playing the good guy; is the good guy, the best guy. This doesn’t make him a bad guy, the worst guy…he didn’t even mean for it to happen. This hadn’t been his intention when he had asked you over tonight.

A simple movie date with his best friend turning into something else entirely.

Something out of his control.

And it wasn’t really his fault. His powers were ever changing, new things being discovered, his body mutating and becoming more insect than man.

Simple interests becoming urges. Simple thoughts and kind acts finished with an ‘but what do I get in return, shouldn’t I be rewarded for saving lives?’ In those newly dark parts of his mind.

He had thought it was just exhaustion. Saving the city, getting his G.E.D and trying to make money to stay in a cheap apartment was easier envisioned than exercised.

He had thought these new dark feelings were nothing a drink at the bar a couple of blocks down, or hanging out with you—his only friend and neighbor—couldn’t fix.

But now he’s realizing that was furthest from the truth, as those dark thoughts have his knee bouncing, fingers tingling for all the wrong reasons; to reach out and touch parts of you he’s only dreamt about. Fantasized about late at night.

One minute you were looking into his eyes laughing at the rom com on his cheap tv, and the next you were still as a board, expression slack, unresponsive. Body compliant as Peter easily shook you to get you to come too.

It was as if you were hypnotized.

As if his thought—as the two of you held eye contact—dark and bitter had manifested itself into his eyes going dark, mind buzzing. Peter coming to to you in this state.

A state that sends him in a panic; until it doesn’t.

Until the dark thoughts win and he’s thinking perverse thoughts that make his cheeks burn hot and cock grow hard against his jeans. Thoughts he shouldn’t be having, shouldn’t be entertaining.

But he’s wanted you for so long.

Longed for you even longer; watching you through his peephole when he was too scared to say hi, cheesy jokes exchanged as the two of you got your mail, both elements soon forming into a tight friendship he doesn’t know what he would do without. He’s already lost so much.

There had been many times he could have confessed his feelings, professed his crush that quickly turned into something stronger—something aching and dreadful each time you didn’t see it. Didn’t get the hint. Ignored all the signs. Dated other people; guys who were no good and only hurt you.

Peter would never hurt you.

He’d treat you the way you deserved to be treated: like a damn goddess.

If only you’d give him a chance.

But maybe he was done waiting. Waiting for something that may never come. Maybe this was his only way of having you. Maybe this was a sign that he should at least know what it’s like to be with you, this way, any way.

Peter tries to make a con list in his head. A list of why he shouldn’t be thinking like this—why he shouldn’t do this.

He really tries to ignore those dark thoughts, fighting tooth and nail against his mind….but you look so pretty in that dress, the dip in the summer fabric showing just the right amount of cleavage.

And it’s like a moth to a flame because the next thing he knows his palm his cupping you. The pad of his thumb running over your nipple, his eyes flashing to yours to see if you react but there’s nothing. No signal or indication that lets him know you’re coherent.

It should stop him, but it does the opposite.

As he pulls down the top of your dress, your bra going with it. Putting your chest on full display to him. A hard swallow bobbing his throat as he stares, mouth watering. Jaw ticking in want, driving him to lean forward and wrap his lips around your nipple. To moan and suck and bite at the sensitive flesh, his eyes rolling in the back of his head as he kneads your other breast with his palm. Switching back and forth between the two.

Your skin feeling so soft and delicate against his tongue.

He leaves stray kisses and saliva covered bruises along them. Doesn’t care that you’ll come too later and see them. He wants you to see them, to wonder, to think that they could be from him.

The thought of you walking around carrying marks from him making his cock throb even more; to the point of pain.

That’s why he lays you down on the couch. That’s why he pulls your dress up, why he presses his nose to your underwear and inhales, runs his tongue against the outside of them. Hooks a finger in them and pulls them to the side to reveal your pussy.

A hungry noise hitting the back of his throat when he dives into you, letting his mouth and tongue eat you out with vigor. Memorizing the way you feel against him, the way you taste, the way he groans each time he swallows you down.

When he feels your entrance clench around the tip of his tongue, he has to move back from your body, has to make sure you’re still out of it.

Smirking with the knowledge that he can still make your body come like this. That the two of you can still be connected this way, even with you in this state. Your body still gives yourself over to him. Still opens for him when he pushes his fingers inside of you, your walls quivering around them.

He could get addicted to this. To having his mouth on your pussy, to finger fucking you hard as he runs his throbbing cock against the seam of his jeans, as he makes you come without you even stirring.

And as Peter sits up, as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, staring down at your body; open legs, thighs covered in your own wetness, underwear thrown to the side, dress pushed up and pulled down, your boobs still on display for him—how could he not fuck you?

He has to. Needs to.

Thinks he might go insane if he doesn’t. If he doesn’t live out his fantasies and finally know what you feel like. Finally fuck you instead of his fist.

So with hesitation still the farthest from his being, he makes quick work with unbutton his pants, pulling himself out and giving himself a few deft strokes before he lets the tip of his cock run through your lips. Mouth hung open at how beautiful the sound is.

A gasp torn from his lungs when he finally pushes inside of you, when your warmth finally engulfs him.

“Oh my god,” you’re so tight, so warm, so wet. He can barely stand it. Can barely catch his breath as he presses his face into your neck, trying to breathe. Trying to not come inside of you so soon. How can something feel this good?

How can something look this beautiful with his cock inside of it and it be wrong?

It can’t. It just can’t.

With his fingers digging into the couch cushion, breaths heavy and groans tumbling from them; he starts to move. Can’t restraint himself from setting a hard rhythm of his hips slapping the insides of your thighs as he fucks you. Your tits bouncing against his chest, body perfect and pliant against him.

“You feel so good, oh my–“ Peter whimpers. Presses his mouth to yours, finally kissing you after all these years. Finally pushing his tongue inside of your mouth, moaning against it, taking another part of you. Making it his. Marking you with bites left on your lower lip, and sucks on the side of your neck.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he’s chanting. As if you can hear him, as if you’ll ever know he’s fucking you. Losing complete control inside of you, your walls gripping him so deliciously he wants to scream. Wants to fill every one of your holes. To not let you leave his apartment until you’re dripping his come from all of them; until you’re stretched and raw from him going so many rounds with your comatose body. “Forgive me.” He kisses your lips, runs his tongue along yours, “I love you, I need it–couldn’t control it. It’s,” he swallows, “it’s too good.”

He wants to hold off longer. To keep fucking you until his cock is raw, but he’s coming before he knows it.

A strangled sob against your cheek as he fills you up. As he continues slow languid thrusts even after he’s spent, the sensitivity only adding to the darkness of the weight of what he just did. The squelch of his come and your wetness louder than his heavy breaths.

Once his breath finally goes back to normal, once his thrusts stop, he pushes himself up to look down at you; to see his come leaking from your pussy and staining his couch. Your chest and neck marred by him, lip having the smallest of cuts on it from how hard he bit you in his lust fueled fury.

You look just as beautiful as ever, if not more now that there’s remnants of him inside and outside of you.

He got what he needed. Finally fucked his best friend, finally showed you how much he loves you.

But…his cock is still hard, and you’re still unresponsive.

There’s no reason why he shouldn’t get his fill of you. You have two other holes that need his attention.

Maybe he’ll keep you like this. That way you can be his forever.

#dark!peter parker #mcu!peter parker smut #mcu!peter parker x reader #mcu!peter x reader #peter parker smut #mcu!peter parker x you #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #tw noncon #kinktober #kinktober 2022

[brostateexam]

Okay, so I have some next day thoughts about Bros and you people are gonna hear them:

Very obvious case where having a separate writer, director, and executive producer instead of Billy Eichner, Billy Eichner, and Billy Eichner would have produced a better result.

Bobby is so obviously an author avatar for Billy Eichner, and there are so many long ass direct-to-the-camera.rants that are clearly just Billy Eichner's thoughts on things like internalized homophobia, why it's hard for gay men to find love and settle down, why it's difficult to be an obviously gay guy who's an actor, etc, that this starts to become almost a documentary, at times, of what it's like being a moderately successful hot tall white cis gay actor in Manhattan.

This is a problem, because Bros is also supposed to be a relatable, accessible romantic comedy, and Eichner is not super relatable or accessible, but he's presented as if he is or should be.

Some rom-coms are about two people who fall in love, and others are about one person falling in love with a love interest. It's a big difference that fundamentally changes the structure of the movie: are we as the viewer watching two people come together and fall in love, or are we as the viewer meant to be embodied by a viewpoint character and experience falling in love with their love interest? Bros wants to be the former, and the major movies of the genre it directly references and alludes to (You've Got Mail, Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally) are all that type. Bobby takes up about 75% of the screentime, however, so it ends up being type two: we as Bobby fall in love with Aaron.

This is why the movie fundamentally does not work: to be a good type two romcom, the protagonist has to be a bit flat, good-natured, and relatable, someone that can be an avatar for the viewer. Bobby is not that. He is an avatar for Billy Eichner. This creates the critical issue with the movie, which is that it feels like watching Billy Eichner play grabass with Luke McFarlane.

When it's not doing that, it is occasionally very funny and sometimes quite sweet, but it can't get out of its own way enough to be anything but an excruciating watch.

[0dde11eth]

Geralt: ok, I've decided to get an email. What do I do?

Jaskier: go to hot mail dot com and I'll direct you from there

Geralt: *types it in one finger at a time*

Geralt: damnit jaskier! I'm being serious!

Jaskier: what? What are you taking about?

Geralt: You sent me to a porn site!

Jaskier: wrong mail geralt. You typed hotmale instead.

Geralt: ...oh...

Jaskier: I'll just do it for you

Geralt: thank you

***

This is based on a real conversation I had with my friend when the internet was young

#my nonsense #jaskier #geralt #geraskier

[sassy-ahsoka-tano]

DADDY ISSUES - Part Four: Vegas

Character/Fandom: Elvis - Elvis (2022)

Prompt: Your new life is amazing, without Elvis. Well, at least until you get a mysterious package in the mail that's about to change your life. [ Fem!Reader ]

TW: a friend fight with some harsh words that were painful to write but i don't think anything else!

Rating: Pg-13 || Word Count: 5058

A/N: ahhh it's been AGES i know but i've been working hard so expect lots of updates!! i have several parts already queued. i'll be posting a chapter every tuesday + thursday until the fic is completed!

also just a reminder that there's a playlist if you're interested and i've put the link to the taglist below!

Song Rec: vegas - doja cat

This is Part 4 of Daddy Issues. Find the rest of the series here!

[ masterlist | taglist ]

🦋 mila

─────•~❉᯽❉~•─────

A year later, you find yourself living in a brand new apartment with Trixie, the girl whom you stood next to during the chaotic filming of the 68 Comeback Special. Apparently, her family is extremely well-off and has absolutely no issue sending her money without question. Although you’ve tried to assure Trixie about a thousand times that you don’t want nor need the money she continues to shovel into your pocket, she insists on supporting you. At first, it was easier to give in because you actually really did need the money, since you were unemployed with no prospects and a scant resume. But now, you’re just starting to feel selfish.

Fortunately, with Steve’s help you’ve managed to secure a job working at KNBC, California’s NBC television station. You might still just be a secretarial worker, but a job is a job. Surprisingly, you find yourself with an unprecedented amount of free time compared to what you had when you were constantly picking up night and weekend shifts every other week at the diner. Not to mention that you make a lot more, too. It’s nothing to brag about by any means, but far more than enough to get you back on your feet. Slowly but surely, your debts dwindle little by little every day.

So far, living with Trixie has been pure bliss. She’s incredibly sweet and very neat and tidy. She doesn’t leave her laundry on the floor, always takes the trash out, and is usually cheerful in the morning. Some days, she even meets you in the kitchen with a carafe of steaming hot coffee already brewed. She never brings home creepy guys who hang around past their welcome and she’s nothing but respectful of your space. She works similar hours to you as a designer at a fashion magazine conveniently located only a couple of blocks down the road from KNBC.

You honestly couldn’t have asked for a better situation and, for the first time in a very long time, you feel safe, happy, and healthy. Little do you know what’s to come when a surprise package shows up on your doorstep.

You’re in the bathroom, elbows deep in water and soap as you wash your face first thing in the morning. Trixie, the early morning bird she is, has been awake for several hours already and is in the kitchen making breakfast. With the bathroom door closed, you can hardly hear anything going on down the hall so it takes you a moment to process Trixie’s shout that you’ve received a delivery. Squinting your eyes to protect them from the soap sliding down your face, you turn toward the door and yell back.

“Who’s it from?”

A few seconds of silence pass before Trixie replies.

“Uh…Y/N, why are you getting a package from E…ley?”

You shake your head. You can barely hear her over the sound of the water and the closed door. Your fingers quickly scramble to turn off the faucet and you grasp for a towel to hurriedly dry your face before rushing out of the bathroom. Sticking your head around the corner, you glance at Trixie with furrowed eyebrows.

“What did you say?” you ask.

“The package,” she responds, holding it up, “it’s from Elvis Presley.”

“I…from who?”

“Can you hear me, honey? Elvis. Elvis Presley? Famous musician and actor? We're both huge fans? We were in the audience while he filmed his comeback special on NBC? Ringing any bells here?” Trixie gestures wildly, her eyes big and wide.

You shake your head and approach her, holding out your hands so she can pass the package along to you. As soon as it touches your fingers, you snatch it up and sit down on the couch in the living room. Sure enough, as you look at the address label on the package, there it is. Elvis Presley.

To be perfectly honest, you’ve all but forgotten about him. With everything going on in your life, you’ve been too busy to pay attention to celebrity gossip or keep track of the music charts. You also have to admit that you might have been more inclined to forget him after suffering the embarrassment of turning down his…offer.

Glancing up at Trixie, you see her biting the nail of her thumb anxiously, a big grin breaking through her face. You shake your head again and sigh a deep breath before your fingers start digging into the wrapping of the package. Once you’ve torn through the wrapping paper and flipped open the cardboard box, your fingers catch onto something soft and silky. Shooting a confused expression at Trixie, you pull out the object and stand to let it unfold. Your breath catches in your throat as it drops down into its full form. Trixie shares the expression, her gasp accompanying yours.

“Oh my god…” she says in awe.

You hold it up to your body and wander over to the floor-length mirror hanging in the entryway. As you press the fabric against your figure, your eyebrows raise. It’s almost the same blue color as your horrible dress from Chadney’s Restaurant, the one you’d been wearing when you officially met Elvis for the first time. Although the color is comparable, the quality is nowhere near the same. This dress is made of silk, softer than any fabric you’ve ever felt before, and definitely a major upgrade from the scratchy cotton of your old work uniform. The dress has a sweetheart neckline with a cut out of the side and a leg slit that rides higher than you’d normally be comfortable with. As you run your fingers over the seams, you feel a few hand-cut jewels. They look like diamonds, although your brain is incapable of believing that.

“Hey, there’s a note with it,” Trixie’s voice knocks you out of your disbelief and you turn toward her.

She hands it over to you and, as you unfold it, two long green strips of paper fall out. Trixie bends to pick them up and examines them as you read the handwritten script of the letter out loud, although the handwriting is atrociously difficult to decipher.

“Cinderella,” you pause and gulp as your brain flashes back to the moment when Elvis had first called you that. When he’d invited you into his dressing room after the special. When he’d pulled your panties from his robe pocket…

“Cinderella,” you clear your throat and continue, “I figured I oughta replace that blue dress you ruined on account of me. I hope you like this one better and that you find the rest of the contents of this package to your taste.”

You pause, your eyes wandering over toward the package which, apparently, has more to give. You reach for it, digging underneath the wrapping paper until your fingers curl onto something lacy. You pull it out and heat immediately floods your face and neck. Trixie’s hand flies onto her mouth as you both stare in silence at an expensive-looking lingerie set hanging from your fingertip. You immediately drop it back into the package and shiver.

“What does the rest of the letter say?” Trixie asks, leaning forward to glance at the note over your shoulder.

“Uh…replace that blue dress, blah, blah, blah…contents of this package…Don’t make me wait until midnight. And don’t forget who-”

You stop abruptly as your brain circles around the last few words of the letter.

“What?” Trixie asks, peering more intensely over your shoulder. “What does it say, Foxie? I can barely read his chicken scratch.”

Foxie is the nickname Trixie had started calling you. Until this point, you’ve never understood why. But as your eyes roam over the contents of the package Elvis sent you, you start to understand that maybe you’re more of a fox than you realized.

“Don’t forget who owns you, princess.”

Trixie’s mouth pops open and she stares at you with wide eyes. You collapse further onto the couch and cover your eyes with your palms. Your heart pounds in your chest as you run through everything you just discovered.

“Wait, I’m sorry…did I miss something?” Trixie asks. “What the hell is all of this, Y/N?”

“It’s nothing,” you reply a little too quickly. “It must be some kind of a joke or something. I don’t know.”

“Some joke! Some expensive joke. These fell out of the letter,” she says, handing over the two green strips of paper.

Your eyes widen as you scan the printed text on the paper. Two tickets to one of Elvis’ concerts at the International Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada. You run a hand over your face and toss the tickets back into the cardboard box they came in. With a building rage, you grab onto the other contents of the package and shove them back in, tucking the wrapping paper back over them like a blanket.

“No, no this is insane. I don’t know what kind of sick joke this is. But no,” you mutter to yourself.

“Y/N, honey…I really don’t think this is a joke. I mean, two front row tickets to an Elvis Presley concert in Las Vegas? Do you know how expensive these are? Who would blow that much money just to get a laugh? I can’t even think of anyone else you know and I certainly didn’t pull this stunt.”

“Look, I don’t know, but I can’t believe that…well, he wouldn’t have any reason to send this to me. I mean, I told him no the last time he offered, so he should-”

“What? What do you mean you ‘told him no?’ Y/N what is going on here that I don’t know about? I’m completely lost.”

Shit. You slipped.

“Oh, no. It’s nothing,” you stutter, waving your hands frantically. “It was…nothing.”

“Well, it was obviously something?” Trixie gestures to the package. You sigh and she places a hand on your shoulder. “Foxie, I’m your best friend in the world. You can tell me anything.”

Your gaze drops down to her brightly painted purple nails and you heave a deep breath before lifting your gaze to hers. Her eyebrows are furrowed in concern and you know that she genuinely does care about your well-being.

“You’re technically my only friend in the world, Trix. But yes, I guess something did happen that I never told you about.”

“Well, what is honey? Now, I really have to know,” she gestures to the package again and you chuckle.

“Well, to start off, the 68 special wasn’t the first time I saw Elvis. I saw him in 1956 at Russwood Park, too.”

“Right. I remember. We’ve talked about it plenty of times. What does that concert have to do with this?”

“Well, I maybe…kind of, sort of…did an embarrassing thing.”

“Like…what?” she quirks an eyebrow and you squeeze your eyes shut to counter the embarrassment you feel rising in your chest.

“I slid my underwear across the stage at that concert,” you blurt, wincing at the memory of your own actions. “And apparently I made an impression because he, Elvis I mean, sent his producer to bring me to the dressing room after we filmed the special. It was several hours after, so you were probably long gone by then. I was staying with my cousin, Steve, you remember him. Anyway, so I wound up in Elvis’ dressing room and it was just the two of us and he just…he just pulled my panties out of his pocket! The ones I’d given him, you know, years and years ago. I mean, I never in my wildest dreams would have expected…do you think he washed them? I mean, ew!”

“Calm, Foxie! Calm and focus. Slow words.”

“Right, sorry,” you laugh painfully and gulp before continuing. “Uh, after he pulled my panties out he sort of asked me if I…like, if I wanted to be his…sugar baby?”

Trixie’s eyes close and reopen wider and she leans forward as if she hasn’t heard you correctly. She blinks in shock.

“Well, what did you say? Did you tell him no?”

“Yeah, I said it was wrong. That I’m not the kind of person who sleeps with married men. Apparently, he didn’t take the hint because…” you gesture again to the infamous package.

“Yeah, I’d say not. What did he offer you? That’s how it works, right? You take care of him and he does something for you?”

“He offered to pay my debts and buy me gifts and stuff. The usual things, I imagine?”

“And he hasn’t contacted you since then until now?”

“Not one time.”

A few moments of silence pass. Trixie settles back into the couch, tapping her finger on her leg, obviously deep in thought. Your eyes just lazily drag around the scattered contents of the package as you contemplate what to do.

“Maybe…” Trixie starts, “you should go see what he wants?”

Your head snaps toward her.

“What?”

“I don’t know, maybe…maybe he has a different offer for you. Or maybe you can finagle your way into an even better arrangement.”

You throw your hands up, motioning for her to stop.

“Trixie, what are you talking about? I can’t do this. It’s wrong.”

“Yeah, I know, but you could use the extra cash and, after all, it is Elvis Presley.”

You just stare at her for a moment, your eyes flicking around her face to see whether she’s joking. Based on what you gather from her expression, she’s being completely serious. You scoff and stand up, grabbing harshly onto the box to take it right to the trash can.

“I can’t believe you would even say that, Trix. I expected better from you.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Trixie asks, standing and propping her hands on her hips.

“For God’s sake, Trixie! The man is married with a baby. What would I do to all of that if I said yes? I’m not a homewrecker. All he wants to do is use me anyway. He’ll probably drop me in three days for another woman. No thanks, not gonna happen. I’m not doing this.”

“Well, give it all to me, then,” Trixie shouts back, stalking over toward you and grabbing ahold of the package. You pull back firmly, preventing her from snatching it out of your fingers.

“Excuse me? What are you gonna do? You’re gonna go see him?”

“Maybe I will.”

“Well, I hate to break it to you, but he doesn’t want you. He wants me!” you shout, ripping the package away from her.

“Oh, that’s very nice of you. If you’re not gonna take him up on it, someone should!” she yells back, reaching for the package again.

“If you didn’t want to support me financially any more you could have just said it!”

“Don’t even!” she holds up her pointer finger. “You know very well that’s not what this is about. I have no problem helping you. You’re the one who’s always complaining about how pathetic it is that you have to mooch off me.”

“And not everyone has the luxury to just leave their lives, you know!” you yell. “I have to work, Trixie. To pay my bills, to keep my car, to avoid going to prison. Not everyone’s mommy and daddy are around to bail them out when they make stupid decisions!”

Right after the words escape your lips, your eyebrows unfurl and grief settles quickly in the depths of your stomach. When you notice a few glinting tears gathering in Trixie’s eyes, the reality of what you’ve said and its consequences are all too clear. Trixie huffs and stares at you for a moment before spinning on her heel and stalking down the hallway to her room. You drop the box on the counter and thrust your face into your hands, jumping at the rigid sound of her bedroom door slamming shut.

“Why don’t you just leave me alone?” you whisper to Elvis’ nonexistent frame as you toy with a piece of the wrapping paper.

You’d lied to Trixie, which you now feel increasingly bad about. You had heard from Elvis. Just a few letters here and there for the first couple of months after you rejected him the first time. You threw them all away without opening a single one. After a while, they just stopped coming and you thought you were in the clear. You were obviously wrong.

You glance around the apartment, thinking about how lucky you are to even be living here in the first place. Guilt racks through your body painfully and you sniff back a couple of tears before reaching across the table to grab the two tickets. As your eyes circle around the words, you sigh and then shuffle down the hall toward Trixie’s room. With a deep breath, you knock quietly on the door and lean against it.

“Trixie? I’m so sorry, Trix. I’m just overwhelmed and frustrated. I didn’t mean to call you stupid or…shame you for your upbringing. And I really shouldn’t dare considering how much you’ve done for me,” you say quietly, resting your forehead against the door. “It just feels so…unreal. This whole Elvis situation. Don’t get me wrong, of course I’m interested but it just…feels so wrong. He’s married with a kid and I…I’m scared.”

You wait a few seconds but hear nothing on the other side of the door. You turn with a dejected sigh and retreat to hide in your room. But as soon as you turn your back, the door clicks open. You whirl back around to see Trixie peeking her head out.

“I’m sorry,” you say but she holds up a hand.

“Don’t apologize. I’m the one who should be doing that. I have no right telling you what to do with your life. I certainly shouldn’t be mad at you for not accepting. This situation is very…unusual. I guess I just got jealous at the idea that the Elvis Presley wants you so badly that he went to all this trouble. And I hate to see you struggling. I know the money would reduce a lot of stress so I just think you should…I don’t know, consider it.”

“I know, Trix. I could use the money, of course. But I’m scared and embarrassed. What’ll happen if I eventually get old or uninteresting? If he gets bored of me and drops me for someone else? I barely know the man but he feels dangerous to me. Steve said something about him being unfaithful to his wife and…it’s just all so much.”

Trixie nods, leaning against the doorframe and crossing her arms over her chest. You sigh loudly.

“At the same time, though…” you offer a small smile and pull the two tickets from your back pocket. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to take him up on this? It’d be a shame to waste two front row tickets, especially with how expensive they are nowadays. And it would give me the opportunity to tell him off once and for all. What do you think? Another roomie adventure?”

You wiggle the tickets in the air with a suggestive shrug. Trixie laughs and nudges the door open with her hip. She throws her arms around your shoulders and you lean into her touch, closing your eyes and squeezing tightly. When she releases you, you’re greeted by a massive smile on her beautiful face.

“I guess we should get packing, then,” you say, gesturing at the tickets which have tomorrow’s date printed all over them.

“I’ll call the hotel and make reservations!” Trixie shouts, clapping her hands together.

With that, she disappears into her room to start packing. You trudge back into the kitchen to retrieve the package and then disappear into your own room. A few minutes later, you hear Trixie’s favorite Elvis record playing from her room.

You spend most of the day packing and preparing to leave since you’ll need to depart first thing in the morning to make the concert on time. At least one full hour is spent on the phone with your boss at KNBC as you try to explain why you can’t come in tomorrow. Another hour is wasted when you spend it calling everyone you know at the office to see if they’ll fill in for you. Luckily, the last person on your contact list agrees to take your shift. You thank them endlessly and accidentally promise an autograph from Elvis, although you aren’t sure if you plan on being that close to him.

You pass out as soon as your head hits the pillow that night and, even though you’ve both slept in, you and Trixie are groggy as ever in the morning.

As you lift your suitcase from the bed, your eyes land on the package from Elvis, half-unopened and not packed in your case. You pause in the doorway for a moment, staring at it. Last night, it was all too clear why you shouldn’t bring it. The answer to his proposal was and always would be a firm no. But this morning, as your gaze falls frozen on the beautiful things he’d sent you and the haunting words he’d written, your heart thumps with anticipation. Sighing frustratedly, you click open the suitcase and shove both the dress and the lingerie inside.

You and Trixie leave LA around 11 a.m., piled into her blue Jeep Wagoneer. Two hours into the four hour trip, you switch off and take the wheel so Trixie can get some extra rest. She was awake until two in the morning pairing up the perfect outfits. To your surprise, the drive is over in a flash and, the next thing you know, you’re inching through the Vegas Strip, stuck in horrific traffic.

You check your wristwatch as you get caught by yet another red light. You have roughly four hours to get ready for the show. After parking and checking in at the front desk, you take your bags upstairs to get unpacked. Even with exploring the hotel, grabbing dinner, and getting changed for the concert (which includes the forty minutes you spent debating whether or not you should wear the blue dress Elvis sent you), you find yourselves with time to spare. You decide to head down early and see if you can get seated before the rush.

When you arrive outside of the showroom, you’re shocked to see the area relatively deserted. You check the ticket twice to make sure before approaching the security guard standing in front of the doors.

“Hi,” you say cheerily. “We’re here for the Elvis show and were just wondering if it’d be possible for us to be seated a little early? If not, that’s alright, but we figured we’d check.”

“Well,” the guard starts, his eyes tracking not-so-sneakily up and down yours and Trixie’s figures. “We normally don’t allow people in before the scheduled time, but I might be able to make an exception for two ladies as lovely as yourselves.”

He winks and you press your lips together to keep from laughing. You glance at Trixie out of the corner of your eye and see her holding a finger to her mouth to mask her amusement.

“Oh, that’d be awfully sweet of you…Henry,” Trixie says, flashing him her most charming smile.

Your eyes drop down to see his nametag which reads Henry. You bite your tongue as you watch Henry flash Trixie a smile. He glances around the surrounding casino floor to see if anyone else is watching before pushing open the big black door behind him. He gestures with his hand.

“Please come on in, ladies. Will you need help finding your seats today?”

“Oh, you’re too generous, Henry,” you say as you both glide past him into the showroom. “But I think we’ll be alright. If we get lost, we’ll be sure to find you.”

You throw in a wink for good measure and spin on your heel, dragging Trixie into the room. Only a few steps inside and you’re both laughing so hard that you can barely breathe. Your laughs dry up in a couple of seconds, however, when you start to take in the space. You mutter in awe and point around the room, admiring details like the golden curtains pulled over the stage and the ornate statues adorning each column. You pull out the tickets and use them to direct you both toward your seats in the front row.

“Damn, we’re literally right here,” you muse, glancing straight ahead of you onto the front of the stage.

You’re seated at a round table that’s clad with a very fanciful tablecloth, dishes, and wine glasses. A candle, unlit, rests in the middle of the table and there’s a note propped up against the glass. You tilt your head as you reach out to grab it.

“Oh my god,” you mutter as you read the writing on the outside. Princess.

“Ooh, what’s that?” Trixie asks, plopping into one of the chairs next to you. You open the note as you join her.

“Princess, I’m so glad you made it. When you get here, come see me backstage. I have a present for you,” you read, your eyebrows furrowing.

You glance at Trixie but she just raises her eyebrows and shrugs. With a deep breath, you grab onto your purse, still clutching the note in your fingers.

“Alright, well I guess now’s as good a time as any to break the hard news. I’ll be back, I hope. If anything happens to me back there, you get everything in the apartment,” you say with a goofy smile.

Trixie laughs and shoos you away just in time for the showroom doors to open and release a line of audience members into the area. You hurry toward a door on the left side of the stage which you assume leads to the backstage area, considering the security guard who stands in front of it. You clear your throat before announcing yourself.

“Uh, hi! I’m here to see Elvis. Well, everyone is here to do that, I guess, but I have this note and uh…well, here,” you say nervously and hand over the letter. He examines it as you wait and anxiously wring out your fingers.

“Y/N?”

Your head spins as a vaguely familiar voice sounds from behind you. A smile immediately spreads across your face as you recognize Elvis’ producer, Jerry. You give him a wave and a shrug as heat creeps into your face.

“Hi…” you greet him quietly.

“It’s nice to see you again,” he says, approaching you. He waves off the guard dismissively. “She’s good to go. He’s been expecting her for a long time. Here, I’ll show you back.”

The guard shimmies out of the way so Jerry can open the door. He gestures for you to enter with a smile and you thank him as you step through.

“Changed your mind, huh?” Jerry asks as you follow him through the backstage area.

“Uh, no actually. Not really. I’m just here to tell him to save his postage,” you say, feeling the need to justify yourself although you can’t explain why.

“Can’t blame you. These kinds of situations don’t work for everyone, although this will be a first for him.”

“Do you think he’ll be disappointed?” you ask jokingly.

“Oh I’d bet on it.” Apparently Jerry didn’t take your question as a joke. “Like I said before he’s been waiting for you, specifically, for a long time. I’m sure he’ll be very disappointed, but don’t let that stop you. It is your decision, after all. Good luck.”

Jerry points toward a dressing room door with big black letters which read ELVIS. You clear your throat and thank Jerry. He nods curtly and then spins on his heel to return to the work he probably needs to get done before the show starts. You straighten the hem of the blue dress he’d sent you and clutch firmly onto the strap of your purse, into which you’d also stuffed the lingerie at the last minute. It suddenly occurs to you that perhaps you were supposed to wear the lingerie under the dress…

Oh well, you think to yourself. Too late now.

You take a few deep breaths and smile awkwardly at the cast and crew who pass through the area on their way to get ready for the show. You know it’s ridiculous to think that everyone knows why you’re here but, despite the sheer unlikeliness of it all, you still feel embarrassed and shameful that you actually came. A few times, you debate backing away and returning to your table with Trixie to just enjoy the show. But something stops you every time. Eventually, your desire and curiosity move you forward and your knuckles knock on the door three times.

Ignoring the fight or flight mechanism that triggers in your chest, you wait for the door to open. In a matter of seconds, your wish is granted and he stands before you. He’s wearing an incredibly detailed white jumpsuit with flared pants and a popped collar. It’s unbuttoned all the way down to his waist and you gulp as your eyes immediately fly to the bare skin of his chest. As your gaze flicks back up to his face, you find him smirking down at you, his eyes already hungrily digesting your figure which stands in front of him. His body is elongated and pulled taut as he leans against the doorframe. He still looks good, as healthy and as sexy as ever, although his sideburns and hair are much longer than they had been almost a year ago.

“Princess,” he says in a voice even deeper than you remember. You begin to notice the painful thudding of your heart against your chest as his eyes take you in. “I figured you weren’t comin.”

This is it, the perfect opportunity for you to reject him and explain why you can’t take him up on his offer. But your brain stalls. It’s completely blank as you stare up at him with helpless doe eyes. He examines your figure once more before pushing the door open to create a space underneath his armpit for you to enter. You glance up at him, waiting for further instructions as if you need a translation. He flips his head toward the room.

“Inside.”

─────•~❉᯽❉~•─────

Reblogs, likes, comments + feedback are extremely appreciated! Please help support your content creators!

**If you notice any triggers or grammatical errors that I missed, please let me know! :)

taglist: @mrsjna @floralcyanide @austinbutler17 @slutforsomegoodlettuce @datsavageavenger @misspygmypie @yourfriendhenrywinter @queenslandlover-93 @kittenlittle24 @slutforblueeyes @theliterarybeldam @guns-n-queen @x-earthangel @adoreyouusugar @butler-trouble @kaycinema @mamaspresley @dontbesussis @littledanette @yagirlalexx @hangmanswhore @dark-as-love @adoreyouusugar @gemstone9 @austin-butlers-gf @dollfaceyourfear @tis-the-season-of-the-witch @coldonexx @austin-butlers-gf @sagesolsticewrites @mommy-maia @atombombbibunny @lexlexl3x @solo-pitstop-vibes @hopefulinlove @lordandmistress @domaniquessidehoe @elvismylove-blog @amiets2 @itsametaphorbriansblog @powerofelvis @beautyofelvis @austinstyles

#elvis #elvis 2022 #austin butler #milasfics #milaselvisfics #milasthings #milaselviscontent #sugar daddy elvis #daddy issues

[eponymous-rose]

It's a fairly busy week, and this kind of thing always helps me stay on-task - here's the day in a nutshell.

7am: Wake up (groggily) - I've found that I like having extra time in the morning, especially early in the week. Cuddles with Clara the cat, a little yoga (I have accumulated enough broken bones and scars that being totally sedentary means my whole body promptly turns to stone), shower, a nice breakfast and coffee while I catch up on work e-mails. A scientist from Switzerland who wants to do a two-year postdoc with me has sent me a document summarizing the research ideas we discussed at our last meeting! It's very neat stuff, and we're going to be putting together an application in the summer to get the full two years funded externally.

9am: Dry hair and set off to work! Manage to catch the 9:20 bus and have a chill commute to campus. Check e-mail again on my way into the building and realize our facilities manager has responded to an earlier e-mail, so I detour to his machine shop and chat a bit about the issue (I'm teaching an instrumentation class this quarter, and one of my students has been having trouble with her datalogger). He gives me a new USB cord, so I jog upstairs to try it out - no luck, just empty com ports and error messages galore :(. I also check out some of the hardware, but there are no suggestively bent pins or anything to give clues as to what's happening, and it looks like the console has stopped remote readings altogether. At a bit of a loss, I send him an update and head down to the lounge to get some hot water for my tea, then sit upstairs and quickly skim through the slides for today's lecture, which I haven't actually seen since last year. While I'm doing that, our facilities manager comes up with a fresh new datalogger and offers to configure it for me while I'm in class!

10:30am: Class goes well! We talk about some fun topics that are near and dear to my heart, and while everyone is a little on the shy and less-talkative side today, two different people are brave enough to confirm they got the right answer for the in-class exercise. Early on, the facilities manager comes in with the fresh datalogger, and I hand it off to the relieved student. Hopefully this does the trick! I get through my slides a few minutes early (probably because of the aforementioned quietness), which gives me time before my next meeting to quickly post grades for the students who gave an in-class presentation on Friday, as well as to link to the cloud recording of today's lecture.

11:30am: Research meeting! A colleague and I are co-advising an undergraduate research intern on a project we're seeking funding for (and have just hired a graduate student onto). She's progressing really nicely and just had a couple questions about a polar stereographic projection she was working on ("Is it meant to look that weird?" "Yes, absolutely."). We got her pointed in the right direction for the next couple of weeks, then raided my candy bowl and hung around a couple minutes chatting about how her classes are going. As she and my colleague leave, I see a message from the student with the troublesome datalogger confirming that the new one works! Whew. I send the victorious news to our facilities manager, with my endless thanks. The meeting wrapped up quickly, so I have time to munch on a protein bar (I usually pack a lunch, but I know I'm going out for a big dinner tonight) and enjoy my tea.

I'm a little nervous about a class I'm teaching next quarter - it's a really specialized grad-level class and if it gets fewer than 5 students, it gets canceled. Currently nobody is registered at all. On my colleague's advice, I put together an e-mail to all the grad students to let them know what the course has to offer.

I still have some time before my next calendar item, so I jump into the early stages of a scientific journal review due on Friday. It's a bit of an annoying process - it was originally rejected, and I got brought onto the resubmission when it was a long-ass paper plus 100 pages of replies to reviewers, and now we've made it through TWO MORE ROUNDS of reviews, so it's basically just a giant novel-sized mess of people yelling at each other. But it's gonna get done!

Just as I'm getting into the swing of things, two of my students pop by and stand in the hallway giggling nervously. Apparently they can't find their TA for another class and have a question about class material, so they figured they'd ask me instead - I gently redirect them to, you know, the professor of that course. "Yeah, but we're scared of him," they say, and I try not to die laughing with the knowledge that his wife is in the office next door to me hearing all this. Mixed feelings on this one - on the one hand, I'm glad my students see me as someone they can come to with questions. On the other, it's a time crunch on me that my old-white-dude colleagues don't have to contend with. They eventually head off in search of their professor while I go upstairs for...

12:30pm: Forecast briefing! We have weekly meetings for a national weather forecasting competition we're all in - it involves issuing 4 forecasts a week. I'm... okay at it (usually in the top quarter of competitors, at least beating the models), but we have some RIDICULOUSLY talented forecasters in our group. Today's briefing is entertaining enough, and we all squabble over where we want to forecast next week (the ~1000 participants vote on the city).

1:30pm: Research meeting! This one is with my most junior graduate student, who's a bit overwhelmed with coursework (the first year of our Master's degree is 9 extremely difficult courses before they finally get to do research full-time). We talk through it a bit and he asks for my advice on project/time management, so we chat about pomodoros, the Star Trek Scotty method (always give yourself a buffer and act as though things are going to take more time than they really will), and not writing the entire day off if you wind up doing nothing all morning - you can still hit a reset switch and have a busy afternoon if you need to. Just generally "be kind to yourself, because in the end the self-imposed guilt of not finishing something will stop you from progressing more than anything else." We also talk organizing code and avoiding hard-coding even when it makes the initial time investment much higher. It's a good chat, ending with some restaurant recommendations when he finds out I'm heading to his hometown this weekend! We wrap up early with some specific goals for the next couple weeks, and, after sending in my forecasts for the day, I get back to my review. I also order 5 lbs of candy to refill my candy bowls. It's been that kind of quarter. An e-mail comes in from a student interested in my course and asking for more info! She confirms she's probably going to take it, after consulting with her advisor. Heard from another colleague that she's got one student interested - two down, three to go!

2:30pm: Research meeting! How obvious is it that I like to front-load my week with meetings? This one's with a freshman undergraduate student who's started working with me as a research assistant on a new project... except the project we were originally going to work on together is going very very slowly (our collaborators at a different university are dragging their heels). He met with my PhD student a while back and got really interested in his work, and he apparently knows more than enough coding to be able to follow along, so I went ahead and got him access to 300,000 core hours and 1,000 GPU hours on a national supercomputer to do some exploratory data analysis. As you do. Tragically, the initial project also only works on PCs, and he's a Mac user, so that's another reason to pull him off one project and onto the other. Alas. The project he can't do is a SUPER appealing project to me (very repetitive, boring work that requires little brain-power - please let me do this from time to time!), so I might participate for the heck of it. Meeting ends a little early, so it's back to the review.

3:30pm: We're hiring! It's a dual hire with another department, so it's been a bit fraught, but the grueling two-day interviews roll on. This is number 3/5, so we're getting into the swing of things, and it's time to go attend the public seminar portion of the interview for this candidate. He is... absolutely astonishing on paper, like a once-in-a-generation kind of mind, so I'm already excited to see his talk. We'd be incredibly lucky to have him, although I'm not entirely clear on why he's leaving a super prestigious professorship two years in. I didn't get to schedule a one-on-one meeting with him since he has to leave earlier than expected tomorrow, but I'll be joining him for dinner tonight. The talk goes quite well, although I hear the students buzzing over whether he's genuinely collaborating or just doing the tech-bro thing of coming in and claiming to solve all our problems... Plenty to think about at dinner tonight. I believe this will be what the kids call a vibe check. (We also have a chalk talk tomorrow where he'll present his work to just the faculty + postdocs, so more chances there!)

5pm: Got some time to kill before heading over to dinner at 5:45. I was originally going to do some work, but my brain is a little fried at this point and I may just zone out and scroll for an hour. More tea! That'll solve everything.

5:45pm: Meeting a colleague to go grab the candidate and Uber over to the restaurant together - I love this place! Lots of good food, and plenty of non-alcoholic cocktails and veggie/vegan/gluten-free options, so an ideal spot to bring a guest speaker or faculty candidate. He was very pleasant to chat with and really knew his stuff despite having just had an exhausting day. Good food, good chats all around. Home by 9:30pm, phew.

#eponymous academia tag

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

20 Author Questions

thanks to @statelysapphicfor the tag!!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

28!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

162,944

3. What fandoms do you write for?

it's that sweet gwendoline chistie brain rot for me :))

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

push me gently (into love) -> (nsfw) -> two chapter Larissa x reader story in which reader is an art teacher at Nevermore. fluffy, cozy, and sweet, featuring easily skippable smut. rom-com vibes.

when the last restraint is gone -> (ongoing) (nsfw) -> an intense victorian romance between Jane Murdstone and her lady's maid, Laura. sort of in the style of Sarah Waters's historical romance novels. heavily influenced by Vita and Virginia's love letters. featuring a lot of sensually read victorian poetry and dirty, delicious smut.

danger level - one (nsfw) -> filthy smut featuring the good ol' sex pollen trope. Phasma x fem!stormtrooper!reader. hot and a bit silly. straightforward and simple porn lol.

particular (nsfw) -> Larissa Weems x (adult) Wednesday Addams, aka the fic that got me cancelled. ongoing, but written. still in the process of posting it. rom-com with dark humour and some more mature themes, but still relatively light. sort of a coming-of-age story.

so very chivalrous (and so completely oblivious) -> Brienne x princess!reader. very fluffy. Brienne is very good with a sword, but a bit oblivious in the matters of love. featuring good ol' lesbian yearning.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try my best to! i feel like i either wanna rant abt my blorbos and my thought process or i want to be polite. someone took the time to write a comment, and i feel like that warrants a thank you!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmmmm. perhaps the sad ending option for my ruin tastes so sweet (almost as sweet as your lips) -- it's a choose your own adventure story!

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

it would have to be either so very chivalrous (and so completely oblivious) or push me gently (into love) which now that i think about have a lot of kudos and comments and hits, so i guess ppl love happy endings hahah

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i'm the queen of controversy apparently, and i was cancelled! but the fic itself didn't get as much hate as ppl didn't even wanna read it lol, i personally got hate mail. so fics? i suppose not. but there is still time, who knows what else i'll post (i know, and ppl will likely have opinions about it)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i very much do lol. the real hot kind :)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

i've written exactly one! larissa x phasma bc. reasons. it's smut. chrome and lipstick

11. Have you ever had a fiction stolen?

not to my knowledge! but ppl have heavily copied my work :)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not to my knowledge!

13. Have you ever co-writtten a fic before?

tried to, but the person in question sorta ghosted me lol

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

ughhhhh idk man. i guess the one i spent the longest being obsessed with is malora. i have a dark past lol.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i hope to finish them all Eventually lol but idk, we shall see!

16. What are your writing strengths?

characterisation, point blank haha. i have a sense of rhythm that i sometimes put to good use.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

uhhh i tend to be vague abt things i am bored with while i write, and plot driven things aren't my forte. i can get very dash and comma happy lol. sometimes i tend to Fixate on a word or a phrase and i'm like okay gurl let it go lol, you've used this too many times. i am not very meticulous and i hate doing outlines and i feel like Sometimes it Shows. i feel like sometimes you can tell english is not my native language no matter how hard i try.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

speak the language at least somewhat, please. otherwise it's really hard for it to land well. personally, i feel very lukewarm about it

19. First fandom you wrote for?

uhhhhh. i honestly don't remember. supergirl perhaps?? or ouat.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

our little dance and particular :)

tagging: @the-frankenman-writes @dianneking @zephyr-is-tired @alder-saan @notinmyvocab @theflashesoflove

#i got an ask!

[lingthusiasm]

Lingthusiasm Episode 72: What If Linguistics - Absurd hypothetical questions with Randall Munroe of xkcd

What’s the “it’s” in “it’s three pm and hot”? How do you write a cough in the International Phonetic Alphabet? Who is the person most likely to speak similarly to a randomly-selected North American English speaker?

In this episode, your hosts Gretchen McCulloch and Lauren Gawne get enthusiastic about absurd hypothetical linguistic questions with special guest Randall Munroe, creator of the webcomic xkcd and author of What If? 2: Additional Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions. We only wish that there was a little more linguistics in the book. So Randall came on to fill the gap with all his most ridiculous linguistics questions! One of our unresolved questions that we can merely speculate about is our predictions for what the future of English might be like. Are you listening to this episode from more than two decades in the future? Please write in from 2042 or later and let us know how accurate we’ve been!

Read the transcript here.

Announcements:

We’ve teamed up with linguist/artist Lucy Maddox to create a fun, minimalist version of the classic International Phonetic Alphabet chart, which you can see here (plus more info about how we put together the design). It looks really cool, and it’s also a practical reference tool that you can carry around with you in a convenient multi-purpose format: lens cloths!

We’re going to place ONE (1) massive order for aesthetic IPA chart lens cloths on October 6, 2022. If you want one, be a patron at the Lingthusiast tier or higher on October 5th, 2022, timezone: anywhere in the world. If you’re already a patron at that tier, then you’re set! (That’s the tier where you also get bonus episodes and the Discord access, we’ve never run a special offer at this tier before but we think this time it’ll be worth it!).

In this month’s bonus episode we chat with Lucy about redesigning the IPA! We talk about how Lucy got interested in linguistics, how she got into art, how we started working with her, and the many design considerations that went into making a redesigned IPA chart.

Join us on Patreon now to get access to this and 60+ other bonus episodes, access to the Lingthusiasm Discord server where you can chat with other language nerds, as well your exclusive IPA chart lens cloth!

Here are the links mentioned in this episode:

xkcd comics

Randall Munroe on Twitter

Order what if? 2 here

Wikipedia entry for X-IPA

Onomatopoeic etymology of the word ‘clap’

Human Screams Occupy a Privileged Niche in the Communication Soundscape

Urban Dictionary entry for ‘based’

You can listen to this episode via Lingthusiasm.com, Soundcloud, RSS, Apple Podcasts/iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can also download an mp3 via the Soundcloud page for offline listening. To receive an email whenever a new episode drops, sign up for the Lingthusiasm mailing list.

You can help keep Lingthusiasm advertising-free by supporting our Patreon. Being a patron gives you access to bonus content, our Discord server, and other perks.

Lingthusiasm is on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter.

Email us at contact [at] lingthusiasm [dot] com

Gretchen is on Twitter as @GretchenAMcC and blogs at All Things Linguistic.

Lauren is on Twitter as @superlinguo and blogs at Superlinguo.

Lingthusiasm is created by Gretchen McCulloch and Lauren Gawne. Our senior producer is Claire Gawne, our production editor is Sarah Dopierala, our production assistant is Martha Tsutsui Billins, and our production manager is Liz McCullough. Our music is ‘Ancient City’ by The Triangles.

This episode of Lingthusiasm is made available under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Share Alike license (CC 4.0 BY-NC-SA).

#linguistics #language #episode 72 #main episodes #xkcd #randall munroe #interview #hypotheticals #what if #what if 2 #q&a #main episode #lingthusiasm #podcast #interviews

[edelstahlviratiberica]

Gostaria de comprar aço DIN 1.2714, DIN 1.2343, DIN 1.2344 na europa portugal e espanha para a sua indústria siderúrgica de trabalho a quente?

Entre em contato conosco hoje para colocar sua exigência!

Aço para trabalho a quente reconhecido por sua alta resistência ao desgaste, condutividade térmica, dureza e resistência a altas temperaturas. Esses aços apresentam melhores características de desgaste devido ao menor teor de enxofre.

Aplicações adequadas de AÇO PARA FERRAMENTAS DE TRABALHO A QUENTE … https://moldsteel.eu/steel-products/hot-work-steel/

Se você estiver interessado em seus produtos ou tiver alguma dúvida específica, é recomendável entrar em contato diretamente com a EDELSTAHL VIRAT IBERICA para obter mais informações e discutir suas necessidades.

Consulte nossa equipe que irá auxiliá-lo na negociação de materiais de aço DIN 1.2714, DIN 2343 e DIN 2344.

Chat WhatsApp: [phone] E-mail: [email protected]

#europe #porto #portugal #din2738 #edelstashlviratibrica #viratsteels #b2b #oportunidades #empresas #agricultura #Ribeira #Bolhão #Guimarães #Braga #trabalho

[bridgertonandchocolate]

Okay let’s talk about this for a hot minute. First - it’s the daily mail so I don’t believe a word they say. The purpose of the daily mail is to create drama and create things that typically don’t exist. Here’s further proof this article is basically BS:

1. The source says that the “screenwriter” is not happy. They are indicating in this article that it is all Shonda. Shonda is not a “screenwriter” on Bridgerton. According to her IMDB page she has ZERO writing credits for Bridgerton. So…this was my first red flag.

2. Everything that they’ve actually said about season 3 so far (which isn’t much) indicated that this season was going to be much more light hearted and more like a rom com. Season 1 and 2 both had dark-ish plots (Simon and Anthony’s histories). I say ish because I didn’t really view them as dark storylines but if I had to choose those were the really deep more dramatic backstory. Let’s dig more deeply into Romancing Mister Bridgerton, shall we?

In Colin and Penelope’s story there isn’t anything dark. At all. Even Colin’s backstory isn’t dark. It’s basically him seeking out his purpose and traveling. Even Pen being LW isn’t a dark storyline in the books. Now…that all being said I could imagine that if they wanted to make the show more dramatic there are some storylines that could potentially turn darker. Because Colin is fearful for Pens safety after he discovers she’s LW they could potentially have Penelope in some type of dangerous situation. Or if they choose to incorporate Cressida maybe she hires people to take Pen out. Extreme. I know. And not at all plausible as this article mentions that it’s a sex plot.

Looking at Colin and Pen’s sexual relationship in the book there really isn’t anything other than love and passion in my opinion. Colin can however come off as possessive (although I wouldn’t say dominating) so I could possibly see the potential with the plot lines we do know about that Colin becomes extremely jealous and dominating and it could play out sexually. I don’t think this is a route they would have gone down anyway but it is possible. While season one was fairly similar to the book, they definitely did deviate for season two. But with how they wanted more of a rom com feel I doubt that they would even attempt a dark storyline especially a sexy storyline.

Another possibility is the storyline mentioned in the article has nothing to do with Colin and Penelope. They’re not the only couple having sexy times on this show. Made me curious if maybe one of the newer characters (the widow perhaps) has a side plot line and that’s where this is coming from. We’ve also seen the potential for Benedict going down a darker path.

The way it actually says sex plot line which seems to me like more than just a scene. That it would play into multiple episodes. This whole article just gives me the creeps honestly because I don’t put any stock in it. But wanted to posit some theories if by chance there is any truth to it. I honestly think they put this out because there’s been nothing put out there about the show as we all know. I am sure it is not abnormal for shows to become delayed for any number of reasons so if they found out there were delays this is what they came up with.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season three #polin #it’s polin season #the polin era

[booklovershouse]

Oi oi, booklovers!

O normal do primeiro post do ano seria falar sobre os livros que quero ler em 2024 porém, eu nunca planejo oq vou ler.

Normalmente eu escolho algum que tá na minha lista há tanto tempo que nem lembro a sinopse ou só olho pra capa/título de um livro aleatório e decido ler. É, eu sou meio louca da vida 🙃

Maaaaaas enfim, nesse ano, vão lançar vários livros legais, ent separei alguns que estou interessada - mas provavelmente só vou comprar daqui a dois anos, quando baixarem o preço 🤡 - e aqui vou deixar o link de um perfil no Twitter que está informando vários lançamentos.

• Arqueiro

🌷| Woke up Like This

Em seu último ano do ensino médio, a tarefa final de Charlotte é organizar o baile de formatura perfeito porém, ela cai de uma escada e dá de cara com o homem que ela mais odeia: Renner.

E o pior: quando acorda, Charlotte se vê numa cama desconhecida, agora aos trinta anos, com seu noivo, Renner, ao seu lado.

~ Passa uma vibe bem "De Repente 30" e filme da Sessão da Tarde então, apesar de odiar histórias meio fantasiosas sem nenhuma explicação muito lógica, talvez eu dê uma chance.

🌷| The Takedown

Sydney está voltando para casa nas férias e acaba de descobrir que sua irmã mais nova está noiva do herdeiro da dinastia criminosa mais notória do país. É claro que ela irá impedir esse casamento a qualquer custo.

Exceto que reunir provas contra o noivo não é tão fácil quanto ela esperava, principalmente por causa do guarda-costas dele, Nick, que é bonito e encantador.

~ Esse aqui parece bom e tals, mas estou sentindo que tem alguma coisa +18, então vou esperar avaliações/resenhas pra ter certeza se devo ler ou não - vcs sabem, eu não gosto de hot.

• Intrínseca

🌷| Spoiler Alert

Marcus tem um segredo. O mundo o conhece como Aeneas, estrela de um grande programa de televisão, mas ele secretamente escreve fanfics, expondo suas frustrações com o programa por meio de suas histórias.

April tem seus próprios segredos. Vivia escondendo seu amor por fanfics e cosplays de sua "vida real" mas enfim decide postar sua última criação de fantasia no Twitter e viraliza. Então, Marcus a convida para sair para irritar os críticos da internet e a vida real ser torna ainda mais estranha que a fanfic.

~ Achei a sinopse meio enigmática, não entendi muita coisa - pode ter a ver com o Google tradutor, mas pelo que eu sei de inglês, não deve estar tão diferente do que tá escrito lá -, mas a história parece interessante.

🌷| Tom Lake

Na primavera de 2020, as três filhas de Lara voltam para o pomar da família e imploram para que a mãe lhes conte a história de Peter Duke, um ator famoso com quem ela compartilhou o palco e um romance numa companhia de teatro chamada Tom Lake.

~ Parece legal, gosto dessas histórias de "relembrar". Espero que mudem essa capa, pq achei meio morta (é bonitinha, mas poderia ser melhor, quase achei que o nome da autora fazia parte do título do livro 🤡).

🌷| The Husbands

Ao voltar para seu apartamento em Londres, tarde da noite, Lauren é recebida por seu marido, Michael. Mas há um problema: ela não é casada e nunca viu esse homem na vida. E o pior é que tudo - seus amigos, decoração e as fotos em seu telefone - indica que eles estão juntos há anos.

Certo dia, Michael entra no sótão para trocar uma lâmpada e, no lugar dele, surge um novo homem e uma vida nova, ligeiramente alterada.

~ Pela sinopse, parece bem louco e eu sou uma pessoa bem curiosa, mas vou esperar as resenhas pra ver se o livro explica esse mistério.

• Galera Record

🌷| En Agosto nos Vemos

Todo mês de agosto, Ana Magdalena pega a balsa até a ilha onde sua mãe está enterrada para visitar seu túmulo. Essas visitas acabam se tornando num convite irresistível para ser uma pessoa diferente uma noite por ano.

~ Parece interessante, mas a sinopse não é tão clara e o livro é curto. Ainda estou pensando no caso.

• Faro

🌷| Hate Mail

Naomi e Luca são amigos por correspondência desde a quinta série. Ou melhor, inimigos por correspondência. O que começou com várias cartas de ódio, acaba se tornando numa amizade que sobrevive por vários anos.

Até que as cartas param repentinamente.

Já se passaram dois anos desde que Naomi teve notícias de Luca pela última vez, mas então um novo envelope aparece do nada e ela fica determinada a não deixá-lo dar a palavra final.

~ Lembro que assisti um filme meio parecido com isso, mas não faço ideia do nome nem nada e, de qualquer forma, o enredo parece bastante interessante.

🌷| The One That Got Away

Dois anos juntos. Vinte anos separados (eu suponho). Um dia para mudar sua história. Um romance sobre uma mulher que precisa revisitar as consequências de seu primeiro amor quando uma bomba explode na cidade onde se conheceram.

~ Uma sinopse bem enigmática, realmente. Diz um total de quase nada. Vai ver é por isso que estou curiosa - ficar obcecada pelo Sherlock só piorou esse lado meu kkkkkkk

• Verus

🌷| The People on Plataform 5

Todos os dias às 8h05, Iona Iverson embarca no trem para ir trabalhar. Ela vê o mesmo grupo de pessoas todos os dias. Faz suposições, dá apelidos, mas nunca fala com eles.

Até que, numa manhã, um passageiro se engasga com uma uva e este evento gera uma reação em cadeia. Sem nada em comum além do deslocamento diário, esse grupo eclético de pessoas verá que suas suposições sobre os outros não correspondem à realidade.

~ Parece ser mais "sobre a vida", mas ao msm tempo, interessante. Tbm vou esperar mais informações sobre.

• Gutemberg

🌷| The Plus One

Alguns fatos são indiscutíveis. O sol nasce no leste e se põe no oeste. Indira não gosta de Jude. Jude não gosta de Indira.

No papel, Indira tem tudo sob controle. Isso até ver seu namorado em um abraço amoroso com uma estranha, aquela imagem perfeita no papel pega fogo. Jude, por outro lado, como um médico que passou os últimos três anos viajando pelo mundo tratando emergências e crises humanitárias, é obrigado a se reajustar por causa do casamento do seu melhor amigo.

Entretanto, nenhum dos dois tem acompanhante - e Indira não aguenta mais ver seu ex com sua nova namorada -, então, decidem ir juntos. Porém, todo o romance e as demonstrações de afeto estão começando a parecer um pouco reais demais.

~ Preciso dizer alguma coisa????

• Não lembro a editora (🤡)

Eu tô em dúvida de onde são esses, só sei q foi logo no comecinho dos anúncios, mas parece q os dois primeiros são do grupo Record.

🌷| In The Likely Event

Quando Izzy Astor pega um avião para voltar para casa, ela não espera muito. Então ela avista seu companheiro de assento, que é tudo menos comum.A conexão entre Izzy e Nate é inegável, mas noventa minutos após a decolagem, o avião cai no rio Missouri.

Suas vidas mudam. Eles mudaram. E, apesar de alguns encontros casuais ao longo dos anos, nunca parece o momento certo. Então, Nate agora é encarregado de proteger a vida de Izzy e ele fará tudo para protegê-la, além de conquistar seu coração.

~ Parece in-crí-vel! Claro, tem um romance à primeira vista que normalmente acho "falso", mas dá pra superar isso se a história for boa.

🌷| First Impressions of You

É uma verdade universalmente reconhecida que uma mulher imigrante, que não possui um green card, deve necessitar de um marido.

Luiza Bento fará tudo o que estiver ao seu alcance para permanecer nos Estados Unidos, exceto se casar por conveniência para o green card.

Depois de meses trabalhando num parque temático, ela consegue uma oportunidade no departamento de teatro. O problema é que estreará ao lado de Winter Davis, um esnobe, que se acha o melhor, por seu passado como estrela infantil.

~ Só a primeira frase da sinopse já me conquistou, pq fica totalmente na cara a referência à Orgulho e Preconceito! Pra quem é fã, não precisava nem dizer que é uma releitura, a gnt já entendeu kkkkkk

Claro que eu não deixaria uma releitura desse clássico da Jane Austen escapar da minha wishlist, né?

🌷| Before I saw You

Alice e Alfie dormem a poucos metros de distância um do outro. Eles conversam por horas todos os dias. E eles nunca se viram cara a cara.

Eles dividem a mesma enfermaria, depois de sofrerem acidentes devastadores e logo a persistência de Alfie em fazer amizade com todos à sua volta os aproxima. Entre suas conversas noturnas e piadas internas, algo mais do que amizade começa a florescer entre eles.

Mas à medida que as suas condições melhoram e o fim da sua estadia se aproxima, eles terão que decidir se vale a pena continuar um relacionamento com alguém que viu todas as piores partes de você, mas nunca o seu rosto real.

~ Parece bem interessante e me passa uma vibe "A Cinco Passos de Você", msm q eu nunca tenha lido o livro ou assistido o filme.

🌷| From Now until Forever

Ben Church está ficando sem tempo.

Ele precisa viver sua vida ao máximo, enquanto ainda pode. É por isso que Ben deixou tudo para trás e está diante de sua pintura favorita de Leonardo da Vinci.

Tempo é tudo que Vita tem.

A carreira estelar, o endereço no Soho e as roupas glamorosas não significam nada para Vita Ambrose, no fundo. Ela viu muito, viveu muito e perdeu muito. É por isso que ela está de volta à galeria, tentando se perder em sua pintura favorita.

~ Só colei a sinopse aqui pq não consegui entender taaaanta coisa, achei bem enigmático ent resolvi deixar quieto, pra meu resumo não atrapalhar a interpretação.

💖| Se vcs chegaram até o fim desse post, ✨parabéns✨, vcs são bem corajosos, pq eu mesma quase desisti enquanto estava escrevendo 🤡✌🏻

Bjs e boas leiturassss <3333

#livros #leitura #livrosderomance #books & libraries #books #books and reading #reading #leitores

[hadescookbook]

CHECK YOUR MAIL! 💌

It's been a hot (😉) minute, hasn't it?! After much work, production is complete, and we're ready to begin packing! (To browse production updates, see this Twitter thread.)

Address change emails have been sent; please reply to that email with any updates to your shipping information, along with your order number.

You have until the end of August 17 to get any updates in to us.

If you need to make an update but have not received an email, please check your spam folder; otherwise, send us an email with your updated info at hadescookbookzine(at)gmail(dot)com.

#hades game #hades #hades cookbook zine #zine #cookbook zine

[luminalunii97]

Kurtbastian Fic Rec

Since Covid took over our lives a couple of years ago, I refuged to the fanfiction world to escape my non-existent life and I surprised myself by finding shelter in a ship that used to be just a fun idea to me. the more I read about this non-canon couple, the more I fell in love with them. so here's my KurtandSebastian fic list. make sure to check the trigger warnings supplied by the author for each fic before you read it because some of these could be triggering.

1.Glitter and Grease by scifigeek14

by far, this is my favorite dynamic between Kurt and Seb. I love it when Kurt stands up for himself. and I love it when Sebastian is not a knight in shining armor saving the damsel in distress but just simply a companion. someone who loves and is there for you. bonus point: Kurt strip dancing in black leather and lace. the visual it brings me is so aesthetically satisfying.

2. It's Hard To Be The One Who Stays + The Presence of Absence by romantic_drift (part 1 & 2 of Defying Gravity verse)

One of the greatest takes on the soulmate concept. from the moment you meet them to where it takes you. this is the story that made me want to fall in love.

3. Matchstick Dreams by egoistoh

Rom-com but the writer is a genius. never read a better description of these characters before. the characterization is just on spot. it's a fun and heartwarming story too.

4. Breathe Me (3 parts) by cacophonylights

Hot. that's the main quality. Hot as Hell. angsty and sexy.

5. Shape My Edges and Broker My Assent by lilinas

Let's just say it's not the fic category I normally read. but this story is just...Magic. the angst, the hurt, the message, the storytelling, everything about this fic is perfect. I cried a lot reading it and couldn't finish it in a go because it's a traumatic story but the sadness was addictive so I couldn't not finish it as fast as I could. it will live rent-free in my mind for a long time for sure. it's not for everyone though. Mind the TWs.

6. everything this author writes: Lady Divine (DivineLady91)

honestly, I'm not joking. no matter what fandom or which ship, this woman never disappoints. I've read a good amount of her fanfics and Loved them all. to mention some of my KB favorites: Deliver Me 'verse, A Memorable Easter Eve for Kurt Hummel, A Thousand Ways to Fall, Private Dancer, Kurt's Bucket List, When You Come Around, and Twenty Minute Love Affair.

7. Handle Me by flipmeforward

very kinky but actually very cute. Explicit but so romantic. The general sense of acceptance and body respect.

8. Kurt Hummel Has Mail by erisgregory

A cute rom-com, where dumbasses make mistakes but they'll get their happy-ending eventually.

9. This Will Be Our Year by iaminarage

A sports AU, Ice skating to make it better, banter happens, love happens, and you'll have so much fun reading it.

10. A New Way to Fall Apart by thelegendofjenna

This is one of those fics that take place in the summer and proceed to make you feel it's actually summer. There's also this fantastic OC that makes you fall in love with the story ten times more. so much drama, so much friendship, basically teenagers being teenagers.

11. Going Through the Motions by JWMelmoth

This one holds a special place in my heart because: ✨Asexual Character!✨

12. A Little Late by cacophonylights

I'm a sucker for misunderstanding tropes, so...! apart from that this is actually quite lovely. valentine AU.

I didn't think putting A Change in the Weather and A Drop in the Ocean on the list would be necessary. that AU is fandom culture. another famous awesome fic is Barista Confessions that I love a lot.

I can't think of anything else for now. I hope these recommendations help someone. have fun.

#glee #kurt hummel #sebastian smythe #kurtbastian #kurtbastian fanfiction #glee fanfiction #dalton academy #warblers #new directions #kurtbastian fanfic #mlm #asexual fanfiction #kurtbastian fic rec #fic rec