#his dogs may be fugly but he loves and cares for them

[topgunreacts]

BEHOLD. CHICKEN NUGGET.

aka: Maverick Mitchell's Fugly Dog from the IceMav Omegaverse tale

Principles of Aviation

What the hell is wrong with this dog? Read to find out!

Chicken Nugget has demodectic mange. This type of mange can be triggered in dogs with weakened immune systems: puppies with inherited weaknesses, old dogs, sick dogs, etc. It's even possible for an otherwise perfectly healthy dog to develop a patch or two of demodex that disappear when treated.

Essentially, a weakened immune system means the dog's body is less prepared to deal with the mites that already live on their bodies. As a result, the mites can get out of control and cause an outbreak of demodectic mange. In Chicken Nugget's case, she was born with a weak immune system and her condition developed rapidly once she was brought home. But the good thing is that these dogs--Chicken Nugget among them--can recover from this condition if their immune system figures its shit out later. At that point, their bodies will respond appropriately to their natural mites, and balance is maintained. Basically, they can lead happy lives, though dogs with more severe past episodes might always look a little scraggly.

Sarcoptic mange is the one you're probably thinking of when you see those sad, skeletal street dogs (or other animals) with most of their fur gone. That is a contagious skin disease caused by an outbreak of Sarcoptes scabiei and it is very painful.

thanks to @doodlebethel for bringing this cherished crusty lady to life

#top gun #icemav #top gun fanfiction #principles of aviation #chicken nugget #MFUDEU #maverick's fucking ugly dogs extended universe #she is a princess #his dogs may be fugly but he loves and cares for them

[ambiguousdisorderken]

christmas time.

what about dean and cas going christmas shopping together huh? what about cas buying stupidly cute plushies and board games for jack and dean saying how the kid's neither a toddler nor an actual kid blah blah so obviously dean ends up swiping his credit card to pay for an overpriced set of legos. it's star wars, okay? which does nothing to erase the smug look from cas’ face.

he also ends up paying for all the plushies and board games and tees (”seriously cas, spongebob?” to which cas flatly states “jack likes yellow”) and (fugly) sweaters and a pack of ridiculous reindeer antlers headbands. for fuck’s sake. is this the type of person dean is now?

then again, he could be doing worse.

on the way to the car, dean asks what cas wants for christmas, but cas only smiles and says there's no need for dean to trouble himself with that. dammit cas. 

"so what, opening boxes and tearing wrappers off, that’s just for jack?" he half jokes, hoping for cas to hint at whatever he may need or want for himself, anything. if cas can name it, dean can get it.

"well, he is our kid, dean. i believe it's common for parents to just sit and watch throughout the unwrapping process." cas states matter-of-factly. "isn't it?" he adds, maybe to get confirmation.

definitely to get some sort of response. not whatever dean is offering, which is... nada.

cas just stands there, nose reddened by the cold and hair wind-swept.

as if he hasn't flipped dean's world topsy-turvy with that one array of words. cas is, for all it matters, jack's father, no questions. and, objectively, dean knows jack is family as much as sam and cas are.

hell, dean feeds jack properly (he’s hitting the produce section more often these days) and watches crappy shows and cartoons because jack wants to (scooby-doo will outlive us all, bitch) and he even taught jack how to drive, the memory of which still shocks him to this day, trusting baby into the kid’s uneducated hands. as for jack, he’s called him ‘dad’ on occasions, and dean treasures deeply each and every one of them, but it’s not something he can brag about with the cashier at the local liquor store that also sells nougats or the one at the grocery shop that carries a specific brand of juice or the one at the 24/7 pharmacy on main where he went get cough drops when jack came down with a mundane yet nasty case of flu, okay. so maybe, if only a little, he really is going all paternal on the kid. sue him. but this... put in simpler words, viewed from cas' perspective? if cas is jack's father and jack calls dean his dad and –okay sammy is also raising the kid, but his family has never been nothing if a little dysfunctional, and the dude’s been spending an awful lot of time at eileen’s, whatever– then that means–

"dean, are you okay?" cas asks tilting his head a little, and it tugs something in dean’s heart. the gesture reminds him of jack. their goddamn child. the same one they're raising. together. and who’s the reason that, three days before christmas, he and cas went to multiple jam-packed stores at the frigging mall, that’s more than an hour and a half drive away from the bunker to buy a bunch of christmas presents.

fuck.

overcome the brain-freeze, dean realizes they're a family. and the word, his long-term security blanket for all emotional outpours, takes a whole ass new meaning.

a family.

they even have the damn cutesy dog.

dean stares at cas and eyes the excessive amount of shopping bags he's holding. he smiles, and cas mirrors it.

if dean was corny, he'd think of how the pale sky threatening to snow makes cas look angelic again, now that his grace has been lost to the empty. but dean's not a pathetic sap, so he settles for the thought of cas looking like a very human blessing, as well as the only gift dean will ever want, not only for christmas but for all the days he's got left to live on this earth. and in heaven. maybe for forever.

"'m okay" he finally replies with a smile stretching the words. "more than okay, cas."

cas nods, quiet contentment wrinkling the corners of his eyes.

definitely for forever.

on the way to the bunker– no, on the way home, they make a few stops to gather supplies for the unforgettable dinner that dean has in mind (pie trifecta is what's got him the most excited. it's pie!) and some shit to decorate too.

cas goes on merrily talking about their holiday plans and jack's childish enthusiasm for everything christmas related, which, in turn, makes cas look also childlike, and damn if that isn't making dean feel giddy too.

dean feels drunk, like he drank one too many cups of that frozen kiddie champagne they saw at the store with elsa smirking at the front of the label. he laughs at nothing, at everything. cas is right there with him, echoing the sheer self-indulgent joy that suffocates them.

he veers for one last stop. this is a sort of first for all of them, this type of christmas. it has a different, warmer, tone to it. safe and mushy and loving and all that. so what if he wants to get it right?

on the radio, mariah the-traitor carey, proclaims, in that 90s pop glitzy voice of hers, all i want for christmas is you.

as they pull in at the tree farm snowflakes begin to fall gently on the windshield. with the engine dead, the temperature has dropped low enough to have their breaths turn into misty clouds, yet dean is burning under the collar of his jacket.

fuck.

he's a grown-up man in his forties and he’s freaking out. except, he isn’t.

except he's in some sort of magic trance because right in this very second he feels – no, he is a teenage boy, sweating. breathing all but forgotten and reduced to a nervous wreck, a train wreck. scared shitless.

he's a boy in his car about to kiss his crush.

and just like a reckless teenager, he does. he kisses cas, not before getting a silent confirmation from cas' tentative yet hopeful gaze and chapped pink lips.

he doesn’t know how long they kiss, it could’ve gone on endlessly, with how smooth their lips glide against each other despite the stubble and with how cas comes up for air to hold dean’s face in both his hands, with how he speaks those same words he confessed not so long ago, this time with nothing but his devoted touch and his all too caring eyes. it could’ve gone on endlessly, but it slowed down once the windshield got covered in white and the sky turned from light blue to a silvery hue.

cas knows, he does. he’s always known. but dean’s done with truths left unspoken, and if he’s happy with what he’s got right now, then saying it will give him the golden ticket right into fucking paradise on earth. it should be difficult, but it’s not. it comes to him as easy as a lovefool’s sigh.

“i love you too, cas. i love you so much.”

this year they won’t only have a christmas, they will actually celebrate it. and no, dean won’t need the excuse of standing beneath the mistletoe to kiss cas – former angel of the lord, now father of his child– but he’ll be damned if he won’t do it anyway just to wring out a squeal of surprise from their kid. jack will be over the moon, dean’s sure of it.

he couldn’t be doing any better.

#self indulgence is my weakness #i live for deancas raising jack im WEAK! and it's christmas almost and and .. #whats my other excuse i had a third one i swear but i forgot :(( #someday i'll write a proper fic with a proper introduction but in the meantime they all just start like long headcanons :( #destiel #deancas #fanfic #my fic #spn #supernatural

[sciogli-lingua]

The Uncluded || Teleprompters || English lyrics + Italian translation

[Requested by @ummmfeminism; I took some liberties with the translation when the literal version sounded a bit sloppy, I hope you won’t mind.]

Ever since I was a kid È da quand'ero bambina On the backs of my two eyelids Che, all'interno delle mie palpebre, I hid two Teleprompters there Nascondo due suggeritori elettronici Transmitting words from who knows where Che trasmettono parole che vengono da chissà dove A walkie-talkie on a mission Un walkie-talkie in missione Roger, roger will I listen Ricevuto, ascolterò Or will I just pass it along O semplicemente passerò il messaggio In the form of a sing-a-long? Come fosse un karaoke? Whammies and Noids be void and null Vuoti e annientati i Whammy e i Noid I feel a tingle in my skull Qualcosa mi formicola nel cranio Like ticker tape the words appear Come su un nastro di telescrivente, le parole appaiono There’s a parade between my ears Tra le mie orecchie c'è un corteo I preach self-love, I know it’s true Predico l'amore per se stessi, lo so, è vero, It’s easier to say than do È più facile a dirsi che a farsi I send these messages to you Mando questi messaggi a te But now I need to hear them too Ma adesso devo ascoltarli anch'io I am beautiful, I am powerful, I am strong and I am loveable Sono bella, sono importante, sono forte e merito di essere amata I am beautiful, I am powerful, I am strong and I am loveable Sono bella, sono importante, sono forte e merito di essere amata

I was laying bricks in a line Facevo file di mattoni Yap full of dog toy Giocavo persino coi giochi del mio cane Picturing a life beyond that of a protocol droid Immaginando una vita diversa da quella di un droide protocollare Bleep bloop boy ox boycott pea soup Bip bip, ragazzo toro boicotta la zuppa di piselli First learn to eat paint at St. Peter’s preschool – yum Ho imparato a mangiare i colori all'asilo alla St. Peter’s – gnam! Now that's a painkiller I can speak through Questo sì che è un antidolorifico che mi permette di parlare Airbrush letters on a pristine gene pool Lettere aerografate su un patrimonio genetico immacolato See, my mother said her father drew a ton Vedi, mia madre diceva che suo padre disegnava sempre But all his cartoons had been swallowed by the Susquehanna flood in ‘72 Ma tutti i suoi fumetti furono inghiottiti dall'inondazione del Susquehanna del '72 The year that he would subsequently pass Lo stesso anno in cui, più tardi, morì I know he had a stroke but I assume that's only half So che ha avuto un infarto, ma credo che sia stata la causa solo per metà And now I’m signing up for finger-drawing class in a tux like a gentleman E adesso andrò a iscrivermi a un corso di disegno con le mani in smoking, come un gentleman Marrying his ash to his dust Farò sposare le sue ceneri e la sua polvere Last on the kickball team draft pick-list Ultimo a essere scelto per la squadra di kickball First to the King Kullen practicing his kickflips Primo davanti al King Kullen a esercitarmi nei kickflip I'd like to say it's 'cause I was a rebel Vorrei poter dire che è perché ero un ribelle Truthfully, it’s easier to say “oh hell” instead of “hello” La verità è che è più facile dire “al diavolo” che “ciao” (Hi, you need to get out more) (Ciao, dovresti uscire di più) I dunno, I don’t wanna be there when the geometry domino Non so, non voglio esserci quando partirà il domino (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) Maybe, or maybe his pace is better suited for pacing Forse, o forse il suo ritmo va meglio per camminare (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) Never, I am nailed to the floor, I am snail under pressure Mai, sono inchiodato al pavimento, una lumaca sotto pressione (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) Fine! E va bene!

Ever since I was a kid È da quand'ero bambina On the backs of my two eyelids Che, all'interno delle mie palpebre, I hid two Teleprompters there Nascondo due suggeritori elettronici Transmitting words from who knows where Che trasmettono parole che vengono da chissà dove And this is why when I’m on stage Ed è per questo che, sul palco, My eyes are closed, I’m in a haze Sto con gli occhi chiusi, come avvolta dalla nebbia I look like I’m made out of clay Sembro fatta d'argilla I’m overwhelmed and under-glazed Sono sopraffatta e priva di smalto I’m making vases out of snakes Faccio vasi di serpenti I’m a kiln half-full of mistakes Sono un forno mezzo pieno di errori When kneading it, air’s overlooked Quando impasto non faccio caso all'aria It’s gonna crack when it gets cooked L'argilla si creperà una volta cotta So self-forgiveness is the key Quindi sapermi perdonare è il segreto To re-sculpting my sanity Per ri-scolpire la mia sanità mentale Mindfulness, humility Consapevolezza, umiltà And taking time to care for me E prendermi il tempo di aver cura di me stessa I preach self-love, I know it’s true Predico l'amore per se stessi, lo so, è vero, It’s easier to say than do È più facile a dirsi che a farsi I sing these messages to you Canto questi messaggi per te But now I need to hear them too Ma adesso devo ascoltarli anch'io I am beautiful, I am powerful, I am strong and I am loveable Sono bella, sono importante, sono forte e merito di essere amata I am beautiful, I am powerful, I am strong and I am loveable Sono bella, sono importante, sono forte e merito di essere amata

I was laying bricks in a line Facevo file di mattoni Yap full of coppertop Mi riempivo la bocca di coperchi in rame Picturing a life beyond that of a dish-washer bot Immaginando una vita diversa da quella di un robot lavastoviglie Buzz, ping Buzz, ping Criss-crossed arms in a tub ring Braccia seghettate in una vasca Learned heartbreak on a Zelda-1 sub screen – numb Ho imparato a conoscere il crepacuore su una sottoschermata di Zelda 1 – anestetizzato Learned dark days by the scent of poached dove meat Ho imparato a conoscere i tempi bui dal profumo di piccione stufato Some part ways and it's fugly Le strade di alcuni si separano, ed è uno schifo Maybe the sum of the parts became lesser Forse la somma delle parti è diventata meno That each individually making the same gesture Di ognuno che singolarmente fa lo stesso gesto And you don't wanna interrupt the overlapping network E non ti va di interrompere il sovrapporsi delle reti So you throw a bag together and elope with cabin pressure Quindi metti insieme le tue cose e scappi con la pressione della cabina To disappear instead of interfere with nutty customs Per sparire invece di interferire con usanze da pazzi And differing definitions of liberty and justice E definizioni discordanti di libertà e giustizia Big dummy dig a hole in the dirt Questo scemo si è scavato una fossa nella terra He put his head in the hole; he is alone in this world Ci ha messo dentro la testa; è solo a questo mondo And dying slowly from the comfort of his home full of worms E sta morendo lentamente per il comfort della sua casa piena di vermi Until you hear a little voice say “Yo, let’s go get dessert” Finché non senti una vocina dire: "Ehi, prendiamoci un dolce" Wait – what? Aspetta – cosa? (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) I dunno – over 2 million dead bats in NY alone Non so – sono morti più di 2 milioni di pipistrelli solo a New York (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) Maybe, maybe not Forse, o forse no Maybe I'll just stay back and survey the lot Forse me ne resterò qui a sorvegliare il tutto (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) Never, I am nailed to the walls in a jail made of deserts Mai, sono inchiodato al muro in una cella fatta di deserti (You need to get out more) (Dovresti uscire di più) OK OK

#i really enjoyed the rap part anyway! #i had never heard of them before #langblr #translation #italian #english #telemprompters #mine #music #music: english

[dramallamadingdang]

Replies!

A bunch o’ them. Some are old because I’ve been bad. :(

For @getmygameon, @penig, @shaonharryandpannisim, @didilysims, @pensblr, @esotheria-sims, @celebkiriedhel, @leavealight-on, @sim-boo, @cedanyblee, @holleyberry, annnnnnd @clericalrodent...

Omg a pregnant sim that knows how to feed themselves. Its going to snow o.o

I dunno, all my Sims take pretty good care of themselves in terms of filling their own motives as well as gaining skill points. It’s probably because of the mods I have that nuke a portion of the behaviors they can engage in, so that they are more directed towards things that actually do something for them. Also, I’ve made lots of objects have autonomous interactions, so it keeps them busy and happy. :) Of course, it makes things like Asylum Challenges a little less fun, but I generally prefer to have Sims that I don’t have to micromanage, as I’m mostly a hands-off sort of player.

penig replied to your photoset “Cherry, nesting. In her pajamas-that-are-really-underwear. (I really...”

Sounds like a useful, fulfilling life to me. I wouldn't want it, myself. But somebody should.

It’s a good life for a Popularity Sim, I think. Cherry’s Romance/Popularity, but she’s always been more interested in the popularity-type things than the romance-type things. Well, except for woohoo, but she’s perfectly happy to keep that within the triad.

shaonharryandpannisim replied to your photo “Mars the wee puppy grew into Mars the great big hairy...”

You always get the best Pets !! Look at the cute ball of floof

He is very floofy! And I dunno, I tend to get fugly dogs, at least those that are game-generated and not the “premade” ones in the adoption bin. Cute cats, fugly dogs. Poor dogs. This one’s not so fugly, at least.

didilysims replied to your post “*sigh*”

Doesn't help that tumblr takes a lot of internet juice to run! My poor shoddy internet doesn't like it much, and some days refuses to load everything, though other sites will run fine. I feel your pain.

Yeah, all those pics and GIFs and stuff to load can really gum up the works. I’m used to it being slow in Colorado, where the only option available is really, really crappy DSL. It’s cheap and it’s the only option for the moment, so it’s not really worth complaining about. But here in CA, where we’ve been for over a year now, we have that fiberoptic jazz, and it’s usually really, really fast and it’s expensive. So, when you pay a lot for fast internet, you expect it to be...Well, fast. All the time. :) But apparently they were doing something the past couple days and I guess they’re done because it’s back to normal now. :)

pensblr replied to your photoset “For the anon who requested them, here’s the mangled version of Spaik’s...”

Still loving your hi-res textures on...all the things. Thank you!

You’re welcome! I still worry that it’ll be pushing it too much...but then I remember that most of the converted stuff from other games is high-res/high-poly, and since I don’t have very much of that stuff AND I don’t have an unreasonable amount of hi-res custom hair, either, I’m figuring I, at least, can go sort of hog-wild with objects and walls/floors. Not so sure about everyone else, though...

esotheria-sims replied to your photoset “For the anon who requested them, here’s the mangled version of Spaik’s...”

*snags* Your hi-res recolors will be the death of me...

I promise to say nice things at your funeral. ;)

celebkiriedhel replied to your post “*sigh*”

More importantly - check your ping - it might be that one of the networks may be struggling. Its worth talking to your internet provider to see.

Yeah, the hubbo called them. It’s his job to do phone things, since I hate talking on phones. Apparently, they were doing something or something was down (I kind of tuned out all the technobabble that I don’t understand), but it’s fixed now. YAY! I’m just glad it wasn’t a problem on our end.

getmygameon replied to your photo “Pop! (I love her OMGWTF?! face.)”

More like a 'no! I just bought this! Damnit I knew I shouldn't have had that extra cinnamon roll last night!' Face XD

Heh. Yeah, pregnancy bumps AND getting fat both kinda happen very suddenly to Sims. Like, 0 to 60 in 0.1 seconds. :) I imagine it might be hard to know which is which, at first. “Am I pregnant? Or am I just fat?” Then again, all the barfing should be a clue to them, I’d think...

leavealight-on replied to your photo “Aaron barged in to hog the piano.”

Apologies if you've already been asked this, but where are those curtains from? They're gorgeous :)

They are a recolor I have of the Holy Simoly “Simply Elegant” curtains. I’m sorry to say that I have no idea who made that particular recolor or where it might be found since I have hundreds of recolors of those things, gathered over years. I’m sorry! But I agree they’re nice. But then, orange IS one of my favorite colors. :)

sim-boo replied to your post “And of course the next morning, Amelia rolled up the usual...”

I like how its not like "I WANT THIS PERSON TO DIE" cause that would be too direct instead they just imply it

I imagine the people who do the game ratings might be a little iffy on Sims outright wishing death on people. :) But it is still pretty much the same thing. Even more vicious is wanting them to be eaten by a cowplant so that the pissed-off Sim can drink their life essence. Yow!

didilysims replied to your photoset “New lots! Captioned.”

They look so cool with their Lot Adjuster adjustedness. (And even without--pretty snazzy buildings.)

Thanks! I’m in love with the Lot Adjuster a little bit. So many cool things you can do with it! I wish Mootilda was still with us, so that I could thank her more for all of her utilities for the game. :(

cedanyblee replied to your photoset “Here are @nimitwinklesims‘s horizonless skies, edited to be compatible...”

That's the sims 2?! Whaaaa- so pretty. ��

It is indeed TS2! Completely unedited pics, too. With all of the stuff that’s been made for the game in the past couple of years, particularly the stuff that affects neighborbood view, I think it’s the prettiest game of the four. But, I could be a wee bit biased. ;)

holleyberry replied to your post “*is contemplating building a custom uni* *is probably insane* *has...”

Yes! There are so many things you can do in this game.

I know! There are so many things that I STILL haven’t done, even though I’ve been playing for almost 10 years. And I see people saying, “Oh, I’m so bored with the game!” and I’m like...how? How can you be? You can do literally ANYTHING with it! Boredom is not possible! I mean, I can see being bored with a particular family or even a particular neighborhood. But with the game as a whole? Not possible.

penig replied to your photo “These two barged in and…um… Well, he’s always admired her at her pool...”

And she needs to get on with her life. No one can mourn forever.

This is true. But seriously, does she need to get on with her life with her brother-in-law??? Because, judging by her wants, she really, really wants to. But A) I’m not sure I wanna go there. I mean, I’m perfectly OK with doing in the game some things that freak other people out, but...I dunno, for me that’s pushing it. And B) Simon doesn’t seem to feel the same. Yeah, he’ll mess with her if they’re together, but he doesn’t roll wants for her. Probably because for him, she’s just one of many.

clericalrodent replied to your photo “Owen is just slightly kitty-obsessed. As in, he pretty much does...”

Ooh, you should totally get some custom kitties to spice up the genetics game.

I might, if I do more breeding. As it is, I’m happy with just what the game generates. Same as I am with Sims, for that matter. Once in a blue moon I’ll download a Sim, but generally I’m happy with what my game generates.

#getmygameon #penig #shaonharryandpannisim #didilysims #pensblr #esotheria-sims #celebkiriedhel #leavealight-on #sim-boo #cedanyblee #holleyberry #clericalrodent #replies

[televisor-reviews]

“Pocahontas (1995)” Movie Review

Please help me get my name out by following me on Letterbox: http://letterboxd.com/AnimatorReviewa

“Pocahontas, the tree is talking to me.”

I know this is technically late, but Tumblr was down for PCs (at least it was for me) for the last few days. That used to not be a problem for me, but writing on my new phone is one of the biggest pains I’ve ever had in my ass, so I have to now do these on my laptop... it also didn’t help that I really didn’t want to watch Poca-fucking-hontas. Anyways, I’m not counting this as late.

Pocahontas was a Native American princess(?) when a bunch of New England settlers came & founded Jamestown in Ye Olde ‘Murica. She’s planned to marry one of her tribes’ heroes, but she falls in love with a settler known as John Smith. Pocahontas seeks him out despite her father’s warnings, & over time, he & her tribe may come together to trump their prejudices against each other.

Before I get into how much I really hate this film, I want to start with a positive: the music is amazing! I’m pretty sure you all know what I’m talking about, it won 2 Oscars for them: Just Around The Riverbend, Savages, & (of course) Colors Of The Wind. I genuinely really like all these songs! Just one problem, there aren’t that that many good songs, that short list is pretty much every one of them. As much as I do love these 3 songs, they are clearly outnumbered & outmatched by earlier, better Disney Princess movies such as The Little Mermaid or Aladdin... hell, newer Disney movies have better soundtracks than this! Pocahontas’ is very good, but it’s not as good as the high standards this company has set for itself.

Its message is well meaning but a bit half-hearted & insincere. I’ll admit, it is very refreshing to see a piece of art admit that whites aren’t the only ones who can be racist... but Zootopia told the exact same message a million times better. Not to mention how John Smith started out racist, but is turned around after just one conversation. Sorry, but you can’t make a liberal out of a Neo-Nazi that easily! And honestly, the biggest thing holding this movie back is itself; if the film was better, the moral would come off better. But alas, this movie sucks.

Now into the stuff I really hate about this damned film, starting out with its most notorious problem, straying from reality way too much. Before anyone even thinks about mentioning it, I understand that many animated Disney movies I love have been based on books & strayed from their original material just as much as Pocahontas does. Originally Ariel died at the end of The Little Mermaid, Hunchback Of Notre Dame, The Jungle Book, & Pinocchio were much darker, Snow White had bigger tits, & plenty of other examples. The difference being that there is a difference between adapting a book compared to real life events. With a book, you can change many basic facts & no one would be that upset as long as the message stays true & is well made (it helps that I’ve never read any of the books those other films were based on). But with real life events, you need to adapt it as well as you possibly can or else it can be very disrespectful. Take Titanic for example, say what you want about its story not really happening, at least the fucking ship sinks! You can’t say that about this movie, everything is way too happy go lucky & easy for this to be anything like what really happened! And I’m not saying Disney should’ve shown Pocahontas being raped & then dying from AIDS or whatever shitty thing happened thanks to white people, but at least not have racism solved by the end. At least some way to tell that the filmmakers cared about the people whose lives were lost while Pocahontas was apparently singing about whatever a “blue corn moon” is!

The animation looks just awful for Disney standards. I’m not saying that it’s like Hoodwinked or Rock Dog bad, but this looks fugly! And I think the reason is because it tries to look more realistic but they don’t look realistic, having them fall at the edge of the Uncanny Valley. They’re not scary looking, but they do look ugly.

None of the characters have much going on & I honestly don’t remember a large majority of them (if her name wasn’t the damn title, I would’ve probably forgotten about Pocahontas). One of the only ones worth mentioning is John Smith played by Mel Gibson, who was a raging racist (the character also). I already talked about how quickly he’s reformed, & blah blah blah. What I really want to talk about is how fly he is constantly, he is always trying too hard to be swaggy & a heart throb. All of his acting comes off as insincere & I never felt like Gibson really cared about this film or his role within it.

The other character worth mentioning is Ratcliffe, one of the least threatening & least interesting Disney villains of all time! His motivation is gold... that’s it, he just wants gold. Sure he’s racist, but so are pretty much all of the other characters, so it doesn’t make him any more interesting than the other characters I don’t care about. He’s also defeated too easily, there’s no big fight or anything like that, everyone just decided that he was an asshole & told him, “fuck you.” Really, the only interesting thing about him is that he is the main villain.

The film is about an hour & 10 minutes, excluding ending credits & that’s a problem. And it wouldn’t be if its 3 acts felt well written & established, but the 3rd act goes by in a snap! Maybe, instead of just ending the movie 20 minutes shorter than most films, why not dedicate that time to making Ratcliffe’s inevitable defeat more epic or memorable? I can only assume that everyone just got lazy & I hate assuming that because it’s goddamn Disney! This shouldn’t come off as lazy, dammit!

There’s also a few scenes of Pocahontas’ raccoon & Ratcliffe’s dog fight each other, in order to parallel the struggles between her tribe & his men. They’re pretty funny at times & I enjoyed their screen time much better than the actual characters’. But this does bring up an interesting problem with this film, there are too many stupid metaphors that the writers think are smart but they really aren’t. That’s not a huge problem, the book Speak has the same problem & that’s still above average, but in Pocahontas, this is like tomatoes on a turd sandwich.

Overall, Pocahontas is easily my least favorite Disney animated film, let alone my least favorite Disney princess movie. It’s pretentious, disrespectful, & mostly uninteresting. To me & many others, this signaled the beginning of the end of he Disney Renaissance, but really, this movie sucks.

2.5/10

#pocahontas #Disney #Disney Princess #Disney Renaissance #john smith #movie #film #review #critique #analysis #mel gibson #animation #native american #colors of the wind #just around the riverbend #savages