#he's doing this because his mom told him to first and foremost. and then secondly because he enjoys dressing up glammy and being liked.

[ratgirlcopia]

if copia had 5% more control over his life he'd just be a drag queen. that's it. like that's literally it that's what this, collectively, is all pointing toward. imperator's like Oh Thank Satanas my definitely-not-kid is a weird little fruit who belongs on a stage. i can use this to obtain ultimate power. meanwhile copia is like the autistic homeschooled religious kid who absorbed an itty bitty fraction of the actual, like, doctrine and spent most of his time looking at images of large men in the illustrated satanic bible. but is fine being the frontman because he gets to wear makeup and bedazzled shit and nun clothes.

#copiaposting #the progression of serious devotion i think the emeritus line has toward satan is sort of like. primo was genuinely invested. #secondo was also genuinely invested despite all his personal hangups getting in the way. #terzo was more like the satanic version of that kid who went to bible camp every summer and knew all the songs. #but also treated bible camp like a dating/interpersonal drama retreat. and wanted like. a high school movie experience out of it. #and copia is just like. okay i read all the stuff i was supposed to! can i go shake my ass onstage now. #like to him the satan thing is just a prerequisite for getting new outfits and being able to sing and dance and crack jokes. #i do often miss things but. i feel like in the chapters he literally never once is like “i'm doing this for satan.” not even as pretense. #he's doing this because his mom told him to first and foremost. and then secondly because he enjoys dressing up glammy and being liked. #and maybe. MAYBE satan is third. but only because there were like. a lot of really hot satans in that illustrated satanic bible.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Hi! As someone who’s literary opinion I really trust, I was surprised that you’re a twilight fan? I know almost nothing except commen knowledge things about that series, and I always assumed it was actually bad/un-feminist. What is it that you like so much that others seem to miss? I’m just genuinely curious about your take on the hate it always seems to get vs. it’s actual quality. I’m not gonna judge bc animorphs is also one of those books where you see it and assume it’s bad.

In over 14 years of loving this series, I’m not sure anyone has ever asked me why I enjoy it instead of simply trying to convince me that I’m wrong to do so.  So thank you for that.

First and foremost, I love the Twilight saga because of the vivid detail in Stephenie Meyer’s writing style.  The descriptions are so lush and dense with sensory information that you can practically bite down on them as you read.  Bella and Jacob aren’t just sitting on the beach; they’re sitting on a gnarled log of driftwood, worn smooth at the top from where so many Quileute teens have sat upon it during bonfires but still uneven enough to rock on its branches when Bella suddenly stands to rage at her own mortality.  Meyer describes that log in Twilight, so tangibly and with such economy of detail, that we recognize it immediately when Bella and Jacob return to that spot in Eclipse.  I’ve always disliked the movies, because I’ve always felt that the best part of Meyer’s writing simply did not translate well to the screen.

Secondly, I love the feminism.

Okay, let’s take a quick pause to let everyone gasp and clutch their pearls over me calling Twilight a feminist work.  I will address the criticisms later.  For now, please just hear me out.

Twilight strikes me as a premier example of what Hélène Cixous means when she calls for “women’s writing,” or writing for women, about women, by women, with a strong focus on the concerns and strengths and desires of womanhood.  This is a series about building and maintaining close relationships, both romantic and platonic.  It celebrates beauty, and love, and care.  Bella moves to Forks because she recognizes that her dad is lonely while her mom is quite the opposite, torn between family priorities.  She doesn’t simply subsume her interests to those of other people, but instead actively chooses how and when and where to express her love for her birth family and her found families.  Most of the other major decisions throughout the story — Alice “adopting” Bella, Carlisle moving the family to Alaska, Jacob becoming werewolf beta, the Cullens going up against the Volturi, etc. — are motivated by care and devotion for one’s family and friends.  Even the selfish or morally ambiguous character choices are shown to be motivated by love.  Rosalie tells Edward that Bella died because she genuinely thinks it’ll help him move on.  Victoria creates an army that nearly destroys Forks because she’s avenging James.  Alice abandons Bella and the others before the final battle because if she can’t save her entire family, then she’ll settle for saving her lover before letting him die in vain.

Not only is there a striking concern with love and care, but there’s also a strong commitment to avoiding violence.  Bella’s eventual vamp-superpower proves to be preventing violence and protecting others, an awesome character decision that I’d argue gets set up as early as the first book.  She lives in a violent world — this is a YA SF story, after all — but she has the power to suppress violence and create peace, both in herself and others.  I was already sick of “power = ability to inflict damage” in YA stories well before I knew the word “patriarchy.”  Twilight was one of the first books to convey to me that power could be refusing to do harm in spite of hunger or anger, that power could be shielding ones’ family, that power could be about building enough friendships and alliances to have an army at one’s back when facing an enemy too strong to take on alone.

Closely connected to all of that love and care, I love how much Twilight is about navigating teenage girlhood.  Is it empowering, intersectional, or all-inclusive?  Hell no.  Does it still dare to suggest that a completely ordinary teenage girl could have valid concerns about the world?  Yep.  The main conflict of the story, as Stephen King so derisively explained, is about the romantic entanglements of a teenage girl, and the book therefore has no literary merit.  (To quote my dad’s response: “Bold words from the guy who inflicted Firestarter on the world.”)

There is, indeed, a lot of romance in Twilight.  There are a lot of clothes.  Alice and Rosalie especially spend a lot of time on makeup, and hair, and choosing the prettiest cars and houses.  Twilight embraces all the stereotypically “girly” concerns of adolescence, and makes no effort to apologize for or condemn them.  Bella isn’t particularly good at performing them — she likes but doesn’t excel at shopping, fiercely defends her ugly car as ugly, hobbles through prom on crutches — but she can still enjoy the feeling of being pretty in a sparkly dress while dancing with her sparkly boyfriend.  And Twilight, like Animorphs with Cassie, takes the daring step of treating that feeling as valid.

Speaking of sparkles, I love the commitment to the fantasy concept in Twilight, including the myriad mundanities that Meyer brings with that commitment.  If you have super-speed, why not use it to play extreme baseball?  If you’re a mindreader with a clairvoyant sister, why wouldn’t you two play mental chess games?  I couldn’t tell you, after seven seasons of Buffy or eight of Vampire Diaries, what Spike or Damien or Angel or Stefan does all day when not brooding or lurking in the bushes to creep on human women.  I can tell you what the Cullens get up to.  Emmett and Rosalie work on their cars, usually by holding them overhead one-handed.  Carlisle and Alice read plays, and sometimes talk the whole family into home Shakespeare productions.  Edward and Carlisle debate theology, Emmett and Jasper have dumb athletic competitions, Edward and Esme play music, Alice manipulates stock markets, the twins go shopping online, etcetera.  The Cullens feel real, feel like the vampires next door, in a way that Louis and Lestat simply do not.

To get to the elephant in the room — I just described Twilight as a feminist text! — let’s talk about the other thing the Cullens do for fun: they have sex.  Weird sex.  Kinky furniture-breaking sex.  Sex that Emmett (who would know) compares to bear-wrestling.  These books suck with regards to queer representation, but they are sex-positive.  They feature an old-school Anglican protagonist offering his daughter-in-law a medical abortion.  They treat Edward’s desire for sex only within marriage and Alice’s desire for sex outside of marriage as both being valid.  Like I said, not groundbreaking, even by the standards of 2005, but still more than most teen novels do even today.

There’s a passage from Breaking Dawn that people love to pull out of context as “everything wrong with Twilight in two paragraphs” because it describes Bella waking up the morning after sex with bruises on her arms.  That moment is shocking out of context, to be sure — but in context, it’s the end result of an in-depth consent negotiation that lasts four books.  Bella says that she’d like to become a vampire.  Edward says okay, but only if she spends a few more years living as a human and considering that choice.  Bella says okay, but only if Edward, not Carlisle, becomes the one to turn her.  Edward says they can use his venom, but that Carlisle, who’s an MD, really needs to supervise the process.  Bella doesn’t love the idea of Edward’s stepdad cockblocking what’s supposed to be an intimate moment, and so agrees only on the grounds that she gets to have sex with Edward as a human first.  Edward’s hella Catholic, so he requests that they get married first.  Bella’s super horny, so she demands that the wedding happen within six months.  Edward says that he might hurt her during sex, and Bella says that she wants a little hurt during sex.  They marry.  They bang.  During the banging, Edward makes every effort to be controlled and courteous and gentile, while Bella goes wild and crazy.  The next morning, she has bruises and he does not.  Edward apologizes, but Bella’s actually really into it.  She spends a while admiring her sexy vamp-marked self in the mirror, touches the bruises many times, and reminds us yet again that Bella Swan’s whole M.O. is being a monsterfucker.  Her kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.

To be clear, I think there are other aspects of the romance that get criticized for good reason.  Edward does not negotiate with Bella before sneaking into her room to watch her sleep, and he does make unacceptable use of their power differences when he thinks she’s in danger of being mauled by werewolves.  The text condemns Jacob’s “don’t wanna die a virgin” ploy to manipulate a kiss out of Bella, but not the wider conceit of all the male characters as possessing uncontrollable urges.  Bella’s struggles to adjust to a new town feel very feminine and realistic; her amused tolerance of Jacob’s and Mike’s sexual harassment as the price for their friendship does not.  Werewolf imprinting might be mostly platonic, but that doesn’t make it okay for Meyer to depict it as a form of soulmate bonding that happens with child characters. Those are good points, all around.  I just wish that most of them didn’t come up in the context of post-hoc rationalizations for loathing the femininity of a feminine text.

I’m not calling Twilight an unproblematic series.  I’m saying that it gets (rightly!) criticized for appropriating Quileute culture, while Buffy’s total absence of main characters of color and blatant anti-Romani racism are (wrongly!) not remarked upon. I'm saying that I’ve been told I’m a misogynist for liking Twilight but not for liking James Bond.  I’m saying that there’s a reason people tend to go “oh, that makes so much sense!” when I let them in on the fact that reactive hatred for “Twitards” started and spread on 4Chan, later home of Gamergate and incel culture.  I’m saying that Twilight depicts problematic relationship dynamics as sexy — but then so do Vampire Academy, Blue Bloods, Supernatural, Vladimir Tod, and Vampire Diaries.  All of which take the time to stop and thumb their noses at Twilight, smug in the superiority of having vampires that fly rather than vampires that sparkle, and for thoroughly condemning teenage girls for being girly while continuing to show men inflicting violence on them.

After all, as Erin May Kelly puts it: “we live in a world taught to hate everything to do with little girls.  We hate the books they read and the bands they like.  Is there anything the world makes fun of more than One Direction and Twilight?”  No one has ever called me a misogynist for liking the MCU, in spite of less than a third of its movies even managing to clear the low-low bar of the Bechdel test.  Because people are still allowed to like Harry Potter in spite of its racism, or Lord of the Rings despite its imperialism.  Because hatred for Twilight was never about its very real sexism, or the genuinely silly sparkle-vampires, until it had to justify itself as something other than hate for everything that teenage girls have ever dared openly love.

I enjoy the novels, and I enjoy the fan fiction that tries to fix some of the problems with the novels.  I appreciate the extent to which Meyer has elevated fan culture, and made an effort to acknowledge her own past mistakes.  I would love to be able to talk about my love for the series as a flawed but beautiful work of literature, but for now I’ll settle for asking that the world just let me enjoy it in peace.

#twilight #the twilight saga #breaking dawn #eclipse #new moon #stephenie meyer #fandom #nothing to do with animorphs #misogyny #ableist language #sexist language #long post #sexism #romance #anonymous #asks

[lumiereswig]

hi hello HI so first and foremost your blog makes my heart go gnKRMSK and im in love. secondly eruhhh im not too certain if you’ve already received a headcanon-ask about this but what are your thoughts on the servants when it comes to dance? do you think some of them are more keen on it than others or are they all willing to twirl around in the ballroom for 5 hours?

this was such a good ask i hauled out my dead computer and physically kicked it until it woke up enough for me to type out this little response

so! heres the sitch on the staff’s Dancing Emotions™:

lumiere and plumette have been known to dance for 14 hours straight without stopping, not even for booze. lumiere and plumette really fell in love through dancing, dancing and storytelling, and when they’re in each others’ arms dancing and storytelling are one and the same thing anyway, right? my arms telling you the story of how we met and your hands telling me the story of how we fell in love and my face against yours telling you the story of how we’ll always be here, in this room, dancing arm in arm in arm in arm in arm.........

cogsworth: are you two quite finished yet

cogsworth tells you he can’t dance, and doesn’t know how, and doesn’t care to learn at his age anyway I mean it’s not like he’d be any good at it anyway and why are you grabbing his hand WHY ARE YOU GRABBING HIS HAND, but as we know from ‘be our guest’ once you get that bitch dancing he never fuckin stops. all of his moves range from ‘gibbon on cocaine’ to ‘flaunting sprinkler system,’ and i’m sure none of them are technically legal in any known ballroom dancing system, but they make him a great success at parties and stanley thinks he’s the raddest thing he’s ever seen.

madame de garderobe doesn’t really get a chance to dance because people are always asking her to be a walking Spotify (“can you sing ‘Shake It Off’?” “bitch do I look like a karaoke machine”), but when she goes she goes! fuckin! hard! like I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a wardrobe twerk but maybe you should be glad you haven’t

we’re all very glad cadenza never dances because belle spotted him once doing a little shimmy when britney spears came on and it was the daddiest dad moves to ever dad

mrs potts is his perfect counterpart in this respect because every time she even tries to dance chip yells “mOM THAT’S EMBARASSING!!!” and then she starts laughing so hard it makes all her moves even. worse

like. i don’t know who told her it was respectable to do the saturday night fever disco dance at a ball but this is why you never see her dance in the movie because she has been banished

cuisinier doesn’t do any partner dancing but he does this slow, languid, elegant swishing movement that nobody expected of him, just this dancing that’s just incredibly feeling himself, and he sings along as he dances beside the stove, twirling his spoon through the air in long spiraling designs, the dance of a man totally satisfied with himself and his fettuccine alfredo

chapeau is a marvelous dancer! truly marvelous! that’s what comes of being raised in a house with a mom and three sisters. chapeau’s mom loves ballet and instilled that love in him, and he once saved a traveling ballet troupe that came through the village when their lead gentleman twisted his ankle. (whether lumiere planted the banana on purpose to jumpstart chapeau’s dramatic career is a matter of heated debate.)

frou-frou does a great bob fosse impression but only if you ask very very politely

#also just to be clear: YES lumiere can tapdance NO he cannot be paid to stop #batb headcanon #beauty and the beast #batb 2017 #batb 1991 #(it's kinda whatever on which one it is) #beauty and the beast 2017 #lumiere #plumette #garderobe #cadenza #belle #mrs. potts #chip #chapeau #cuisinier

[yamithediaperdork]

Des checks in but she can’t check out (OC story staring my buddy sparkle)

Des Checks in, but she can't check out

Malcore stared at his sister in a mixture of shock and amusement, as they sat at his place having supper. It was a few days before Des's 18th birthday and since Malcore had to work the night of her birthday, he'd invited her over to his small one bedroom apartment for a few drinks and a birthday dinner. in fact they were on their 3rd glass of rye and coke when Des had told Malcore what it was she wanted for her birthday. shaking his head, he just reached over and took her drink away. "Ok, clearly I was wrong, you can't handle the good stuff and your cut off." he laughed. "malcorrrrre!" Des whined. "I'm not drunk!" "I think you are. Otherwise you wouldn't of asked me to commit you to a mental asylum for a week so you could be treated like a baby." Malcore said, sipping his own drink. "Stop being a butt head about this!I know what I want!" Des whined again and pouted. "And you told me I could have whatever I wanted! and this is what I want!" Malcore rolled his eyes, but let her have her glass back and finished off the last of his steak, thinking. "Ok Des, let's say I do decide to help you with this. first and foremost..you living with mom and dad still. I think their gonna notice you missing for a week." Malcore pointed out. "They actually won a cruise and so their gonna be gone for a whole month. they're gonna trust me to stay by myself at home...so they'll never know." Des said and smiled. "..So your rewarding their trust by...Ok ok..never mind. Secondly, How exactly am i suppose to get you locked up in the loony bin, and treated like a baby? I'm not exactly made of money you know." Malcore pointed out, gesturing to his tiny place. "Ooook sooo I found a place that does more.. temp placements and hold patients while the family gets things ready at home. it's not free but I got the money to cover for it! I've been saving up all year for this." Des said proudly, flashing her toothy grin. "..Ok, who's gonna look after Mom and dad's place while your in the nut house drooling on yourself in a strait jacket?" "A duh, YOU! You job is actually closer to their place AND they have AC and a satellite dish. all the channels you could want and you just have to mow the grass. Plus their fridge is stocked." "..I'll THINK about it, but one's thing for sure Des.." malcore said, smirking and taking a drink. "whats that?" She asked. "Either way you SHOULD be in the nut house. your bonkers." he teased.

two days after Des's birthday, Her and malcore saw they're parents off on their cruise and malcore promised to look after Des and make sure she stayed out of trouble. He still hadn't given her his answer yet but as they walked to their parents car he made her sit in the back seat 'where little babies belonged.' Pulling out of the parking lot she was a little disappointed as they started on the route back to the house. "Sooo uh.. guessing thats a no on my gift..huh?" she asked, sounding a little disappointed. "Des did you really think I'd just drive you up to the nut house and take you in like this and get you put in there for a week?" Malcore asked, looking in the rear view mirror and seeing her pout. "I..I dunno." she huffed. "Think about it Des..if you want them to believe you think your a big baby damage to yourself we have to dress you for the part first." malcore said and smirked. "Then..then you're gonna do it?!" Des squealed, and went to lunge forward to hug him and got caught by her seat belt. "Pffft, DORK! and yeah, but we're gonna have to sell it..so I hope you have some babyish outfits at home..and lots of diapers." "heh, you bet your butt I do!"

Malcore hadn't been sure what to expect when Des pulled out her little suitcase of goodies out from under her bed, but he knew it was going to be a mixture of cute and funny. and he wasn't disappointed. thick white disposables diapers, Disney print ones, and even some cloth diapers with a pair of locking plastic panties, with ruffles on the butt. aside from the diapers she had a few different t-shirts with phases on them like 'mommies widdle stinker' and 'daddies girl' and 'caution: full load'. finishing off his sisters little collection of kink, was a matching light pink baby booties and baby mittens, both of them lockable. "well I think we know what your mostly gonna be wearing to prove your helpless and a big baby." Malcore joked, nodding at all the lockable stuff. "you got a preference on which t-shirt you wear in?" he asked, then noticed a bottle of mad lax in one of the pockets. "huh, I thought they stopped making this stuff after it kept being used in so many pranks and so many kids were crapping their pants." "Oh heh, I uh, got the last bottle before it was pulled. only used it once or twice, the stuff is WAY too powerful." Des said sheepishly. "I was crapping myself with like NO control for a day and..a..half.." She trailed off as she noted the look on Malcore's face. "Noooo no no no no no!" she said, waving her hands back and forth. "oh come on, you wanna be put in a strait jacket and left to poop yourself, but some mad lax is too much for you? don't be such a baby." Malcore laughed and winked. "..See when you put it like that.." She said, giggling a little. "Andddd I dunno.. what shirt do you think will work best?" "Caution, full load for sure. now go and get a shower in and uh.. shave..you know.." Malcore said, suddenly blushing and looking uncomfortable. "Huh? why?" "Because well, do you think we'd let a big baby have big girl hair? sides it'll give you one last chance to think about whether or not you really want this." malcore said. Des blew a raspberry but marched off. "..the shit I do to make my little sister happy." the 20 year old grumbled. "I HEARD THAT!"

all squeaky clean, Des practically skipped her way back into her room, on cloud nine and eager to get dressed like the big baby she knew she was. no being a dumb stinky big girl for a whole week, with the added benefits of being helpless and she was sure there would be at least some humiliation involved too.. it was everything a total diaper dork big baby like her could hope for! coming into the room she saw Malcore had gotten the diapers all ready for her as well as the rest of her soon to be attire and as a nice little bonus, had prepped a sippy cup for the big baby ('hehehehe thats me!' she thought) to drink. "Last chance to bail and just I dunno, waddle around the house and I'll tease you." Malcore said, smirking. "..wait, that was a option?" asked asked, putting a blank look on her face. "..Uh..yeah of cou-" "Kidding! I knew that dork. it won't be the same!" Des said and burst out laughing. "..Somebody wants a spanking before her butt goes back in diapers huh?" Malcore said dryly. "Threaten ME with a good time!" "andddd my kink limit has been hit. come on doofus, get over here so big brother can get you back in your diapie wipies." Des giggled and walked over, dropping her towel and planting her butt on the thick terry cloth diaper and grinned like a fool as malcore powdered her and then pinned them nice and snug. "where's your bank card so I can pay for this whole little trip back to baby land for you?" He asked, tugging the t-shirt on her then holding out the plastic panties for her to step into. "oh, I just have it all in cash, it's in my night stand." Des said, holding onto Malcore as she stepped into the plastic pants. "And I think you mighta gone too thick with the diapers, I don't think the plastic panties are gon- URK!" Des was cut off as Malcore yanked up with the panties, lifting her up off her feet for a second and letting her weight force them over the thick cloth diapers, making them bludge and puff out, then locked them tight. He also gave her the mother of all diaper wedgies as he let her plop down onto her pampered butt. "You were saying?"  he asked. "Son of a bisket eating weevil, that HURT you butt!" she huffed. "Aww widdle baby Des can handle spanking but not a widdle wedgie?" he asked in a mocking baby tone. Des glared at him but then he reached down and tapped a finger on the end of her nose. "boop!" this, much like it had when they were 3 and 5, made her break into helpless giggles.

with the mittens and booties clicked into place, and Des using both hands to hold the sippy cup in place as she chugged, malcore lead the way out to the car, which was parked back in the garage. sure it could of been cute to make her waddle into the driveway like this but since they hadn't been able to find a skirt, let alone pants that could of covered her massive diapered ass malcore was glad he had parked inside. 'That's all we need, noisy ms.Johnson from across the street seeing Des in all her diaper dork glory.' with Des strapped into the backseat, and Malcore having all her monies in his wallet, they drove off to go and commit Des to a week of babyhood, though before they even reached the end of the block Malcore was rolling down the windows and glaring at the rear view mirror at a blushing Des. "I-I told you this stuff works quick.." She whined.

The Nurse at the front desk for oaks mental placement ward had seen a lot of things in her 3 years on the job. People who thought they were kitties, a guy who insisted her was Bill Clinton..and even one man who turned to go super sayain has his parents had dragged him in. Today she smelled the newest arrival far before she saw her, and raised a eyebrow at the sight of a young man leading in a girl dressed like a big baby, and judging from the funk in the air the blond girl was living up to the disclaimer on her t-shirt. "Malllcorrrrre, I wanna go pway wiff da other babies at da park!" the blond girl was whining. "Just hang on Des, Big brother needs to talk with the nice lady." the Brown haired man was saying, Malcore the nurse assumed. "Excuse me, who do I talk to about admitting my sister for a week?" he asked. "Whattt? nu admitting! wanna stay with ou!" the blond girl whined and started to have a full on fit, slapping at malcore and looking like a big stinky toddler. the nurse was forced to call two orderlies out, and then lead Malcore to go and talk with her boss.

Des put up the best fight she could, not that she wanted to get away, but she wanted to make sure they felt the need to restrain her as tight as possible for her stay. She also nipped at fingers and was rewarded with a big fat pacifier gag being forced in her mouth and strapped around her head. she suckled on it and fussed, till a hard swat on her squishy rear made her knees wobble, then she was dumped into a large medical crib, too high for her to climb out of even if she hadn't of been in a massive diaper that had been loaded to the brim. Getting to her knees she held onto the bar's with her mitten hands and glared at the two missing link's that were the orderlies. "Sheesh, this ones gonna be a handful, I can already tell." "no shit Sherlock. I don't care WHAT her brother says, I'm getting a strait jacket for her." the other one said, rubbing his eye where Des had scored a lucky hit. "heh, think spanking will be part of her treatment?" the first one asked, shaking his hand where Des had bitten his fingers. "because I could go for tanning her bratty backside." '..This..this might of been a mistake.' Des was realizing for the first time as she whined and backed away from the two, landing on her mushy back side and letting out a loud wet sounding fart. "Ugh! Christ! what did she eat, road killed skunk!?!"

In the head office Malcore was just finishing up the last of the paper work, it had been stupid easy to get Des signed in..it almost seemed like the guy running the place KNEW what was really going on but didn't mind as long as malcore could pay for Baby Des's stay. it had taken the better part of a hour and in that time Malcore had given over the key and given permission for them to get Des changed, in more ways then one and also given them free reign to use whatever treatments they deemed needed to keep her safe from harming herself, and even allowed corporal punishment if they felt it was warranted. One small change though from the original plan, unknown to Des though she would soon find out..was that Malcore hadn't just paid for one week like the little dork wanted. As it turned out the place hadn't cost as much as Des had assumed, and so, being the -kind- and loving big brother he was.. Malcore had signed her up for three weeks. Of course he'd be lying if he said the temptation to enjoy his parents house hadn't played a role in this, but he also figured after three weeks in baby bondage land Des would either be cured of her need for this darker side of her fetish..or hug him like crazy and thank him for making it real. he was ready to flip that coin. "Well, i think that about does it." Dr. Altez said, shaking Malcore's hand. "Would you like to see your sister before taking off to supervise the constitution of her new nursery.?" "of course, though i don't think she's gonna be very happy with me. I did after tell her we were going to the park." Malcore chuckled, getting up and leaving with the good doctor. "heh, well we all do what we must." Walking down the hallway Malcore was lead into the nursery, where a series of cribs were set up and there was a changing table. the carpeting was nice and plush and there was a animal print on the walls and from the looks of it, a toy chest just filled with nice soft toys that Des would be able to play with, if she could earn good girl time. Sitting in a crib by the back of the room however was Des who was mumbling before her paci gag. She'd been changed from her soiled padding of course, and was now in a thick wet plastic diaper and a light pink straitjacket that had her arms trapped at her sides. her booties had been replaced and -snk-, her hair had been brushed and put into pig tails. the paci gag had a cute little pink mouth guard on it and she was wearing a little bib..mostly because with all the grumbling and muffled protests she was trying to do she had a stream of drool going down her chin. rocking back and forth and clearly trying to get her arms free, Des cried out around the gag and tried to get up only to fall on her face , though the mattress of the crib was soft enough she didn't hurt herself. "would you like a moment alone with her to say bye bye?" The good doctor asked. "Yes please." malcore said. Once they were alone, Malcore walked over and leaned over the crib bars, down at Des. "Well dork, having fun yet?" malcore asked. Des glared at him and started to shake her head no. "ah ah ah, beeee honest~" Malcore scolded, wagging a finger. She stopped, then closed her eyes and nodded. "Good, I'm glad you having fun, I know this might seem a little scary at times, but I'm sure you'll get used it before your first week is up." malcore said. That got her attention and Des's eyes went wide, and she gave him a questioning look. "oh yeah, I decided since it was cheaper then we thought, to give you -THREE- weeks in baby land. I didn't think you'd mind, but on the off chance you do..well.. No one will care. I've already given consent for the paci gag to stay in save for when you're being feed, which will be bottle feeding of formula, and I've okayed them spanking you if you get out of line. I ALSO.." and malcore gave a evil little grin. "Told them how much you loooove sitting in poopie diapers..so asked that they let you sit in everyone for at least half a hour." at this Malcore reached in and patted Des's head, as she glared and shook, going red in the face and trying to yell at him. "Aww, no need to thank me, your my BABY sister after all, i just want you to be happy. and who knows, Maybe mom and dad will decide to extend their cruise and I'll pay out of my own pocket for you to stay awhile longer." Des was whimpering and whining now, shaking her head. "Des calm down, we both know you're going to enjoy the hell out of this, this is exactly what you wanted. I'm just giving it to you for longer then you wanted. I promise I'll come and visit you every couple of days." Malcore said and patted her head. Des whined and trying to pull away, but the head pats apparently felt nice and she relaxed. Maybe she relaxed a little too much as a wet bubbly fart escaped and the back of her diaper started to puff out. "heh, and that's my cue to leave. Bye bye baby des. Have fun~" Malcore coo'ed and walked away, stopping at the door. "and remember, big brother loves you~" he said with a wink, then walked out as Des did the only thing she could. and finished loading her diapies.

The end

[wizaad]

been seeing a LOT of opinion on yesterday's twitter lore comic andddd I think I'm going to have one single incoherent take on it before dipping back into the void

The writing in this comic was GOOD on the sole basis that it felt SO much more natural and true to the Mirage we've been shown since the game launched

I dooo have an issue with a few things, and first and foremost on that list is making Mirage IMC-affiliated. Theres no way the writers didn't know everyone thought of him as a militia kid. Like, hello?? Mirage screams militia kid, and one thing the cast of Legends DIDN'T need was another pro-IMC (or if not pro, heavily affiliated) character

secondly... the pineapple on the pizza😭 how could they do this to my comfort character...

the whole "why have mirage and wraith been friends all this time yet mirage decides Now is a good time to actually go looking for her files" thing. I mean, at face value?? I wholeheartedly agree. BUT. People seem to be forgetting that Wraith is an amnesiac who didn't always know she HERSELF was IMC. theres no way for him to know that unless she TOLD him. and this is Wraith we're talking about. it's anyone's guess as to the timeframe between her finding out about her IMC affiliation and actually telling Mirage lol

"but if thats the case why didnt he go looking for her files immediately upon finding out??" well look. fair point! but mirage couldnt just. go looking for the files without getting help from his mom, who is—as everyone knows—suffering from Alzheimer's. the only time she could help him is when she's lucid enough to!!

also as someone with severe executive dysfunction and forgetfulness, I can empathise with Mirage putting off looking for the files. I know that sounds really stupid and like, if she meant a lot to him it wouldn't matter how long it would take, but I myself have put having a place in college on the line because of my executive dysfunction. I mean. not to get all psychological on a twitter lore comic, but yeah. I'm just saying, personally, its sort of reasonable??

lastly? Mirage 100% deserved the backlash he got from Wraith in the last comic. he treated her and path pretty shit. and yeah, this comic looked a lot like the writers rushing Mirage's character development and scrambling to let him off the hook, but iirc??? wraith never told him she forgave him. mirage openly acknowledged that finding her files didnt erase the way he treated her. the entire narration of that comic centralised on mirage realising his mistakes and shortcomings. he knows hes got a long way to go. nobody let mirage away with it (except maybe pathy but its definitely NOT ooc for him to forgive mirage as soon as he sees flowers and the word BFF)!! he literally said that his actions were him "taking the first step"!!

anyway this got fucking long!!! it is the asscrack of dawn and I very unsurprisingly still have a lot of feelings. goobye

#apex legends #wrote this at 5am and it makes sense rn but will probably not when im like. actually alive

[fineliines]

okay so before things get misconstrued, i have seen the post @pocmuzings posted and i have quite a lot to say at least to explain my side of the story. you guys can make the choice to believe me or not but everything on this post is the truth on my end. this is very long and i hope everyone takes the time to read it but it’s just a warning this is long.

first and foremost, you need to understand that i have never once in my entire life said the n word. i grew up in a household where i always knew the weight of that word and it’s heavy connotations my entire life; my mom, grandma and cousins always used the word despite being spanish because they were very racist and stereotyped the black community. i knew of that, i was young when they used the word (probably around elementary school age) and never spoke up because i was a child. however, i’ve always known it’s not the right word to say or is it my place to say it as a non-black poc. i’m unsure if the person sending the anon meant to say i was using the word or if it was my friend at the time in the post but i have never EVER said that word. i would never use that word, i’m not ignorant on it and have always known what it’s implications were.

secondly, the problematic friend in question was someone i knew in my real life. we went to high school together, we met through a mutual friend who looking back on it, that mutual friend sexually assaulted me at one point and BECAUSE of that incident and numerous other things that happened in that small friend group, i pulled away and found solace in this person. his name was cameron, he’s no longer in the rpc so i really don’t care about putting his name out there to help keep track while i write this out. to give more background on this, cameron wasn’t the kind of person i could simply “get rid of” like i could have if he’d been someone i met online. like i said, we went to high school together, we lived in the same town, we became INSEPERABLE-- i vacationed with him and his family on MULTIPLE occasions. my mom and his mom became friends, we spent holidays together, etc. this wasn’t someone i could write off. we met when i was around 15 years old and he was 17 and we stayed friends from me being 15 to around the age of me being 21... in fact, i believe our last outing together was my 21st birthday but that’s irrelevant. i am now 24. throughout the time that we were best friends, however, i got him into rping and we were in the rpc together for an extended period of time. cameron has always been extremely problematic and this was something i didn’t necessarily become aware of until later on in our friendship. we started rping together in american horror story roleplays which is where i first started and in general, those rp’s were very very problematic and dark; it was a completely different time in the rpc compared to now and i am 100% aware of that. 

cameron became notorious for causing drama wherever he went. in the ahs rp we were in, something happened between my character and someone else’s, anon hate was sent to the gossip blog or w/e about my character and it got to the point where i, myself, was being told to kill myself through anon hate because of whatever ship drama was happening. i was 15 years old and people on the internet were telling me to kill myself. cameron stepped in, defended me in the only way he knew how, started drama with the admins for not doing anything to stop the stuff being sent to me or help me and we got kicked out of the group as the solution to their problem. from that moment on, cameron simply never stopped causing problems and i often found myself getting dragged into things with him because we were friends and i stuck up for him because he usually stuck up for me. at some point as i got a little older, maybe 17/18, i can’t remember, me and him joined this subplot rp that this person who sent in the anon was running. yes, cameron and i became friends with the person, she was the admin, things were fine for a while and eventually, things in the group started getting slow so cameron wanted to leave and me, being the person i was at the time, followed him because he was my best friend. i remained somewhat friends with the anon but i always felt like things were strained between us BECAUSE cameron was always up to something; whether it was causing problems in the anon’s various groups she joined or simply leaving because he got bored or just being a general bully, befriending people and manipulating them and being ugly and problematic and racist. i can’t remember the anon ever talking to me about being uncomfortable with his actions because it was years ago and i’ll admit that at the time, it wasn’t important to me because i thought things were fine because her problems with cameron weren’t ever explicitly told TO me. i will admit that from the ages of 15-18, whenever cameron started drama or was problematic or did shitty things, i blindly followed him and never spoke up. i didn’t speak up because i felt like he helped me and defended me and PROTECTED me from my assaulter in real life and all the anon hate i got from this group that i owed him my loyalty. again, please keep in mind, i’ve been friends with him since we were both in high school, he wasn’t someone i could simply write off or get rid of at the time.

i started realizing he wasn’t a good person when i got a little older. i decided to open up a group that was based off college kids and it was based off the college i currently attend, ucf--- genuinely i don’t remember the url of the group but @wonclerland was in it with me because we were friends. cameron joined, obviously and at the time that i was admining, he didn’t do much. people joined who i’d met through a previous rp and to be honest, that group of people and i were 100% a really stupid clique of mean people. they were really mean and petty and ugly and i never said anything to them or about what they said because i wanted to fit in and again, i admit to that. some girl joined the group who went by the name athena or it was her alias, i don’t really know but apparently, she had beef with that group of people who joined and they claimed she was racist but could never properly pull up proof to show me or whatever. as an admin, i was caught in the middle trying to hear every side of the story. cameron befriended athena and all hell broke loose.  i ended up going to playlist live for a day and mistakenly, i had asked one of the people in the little clique of mine to run the main while i was gone for the day. in the span of the 8 hours i was gone, the clique had posted athena’s unfollow despite her not wanting to quit and blah blah blah. i shut down the group because i didn’t know what to do and it make me anxious and stressed. cameron and athena formed a group of friends FROM that group and started to go on the girl who posted the unfollow’s instagram and comment hateful, bodyshaming things. they went as far as editing a picture of the girl on photoshop to look like shrek. i saw this all unfold and realized what kind of person cameron was and decided to TRY to sever ties with him. multiple times after this, i attempted to call him out on his ugly behavior on the tail end of our friendship. we would get into really violent fights in person and he’d come to target where i worked at the time to scream at me and yell at me in person. i called him out for being racist and problematic and using the n word- in return, he took down an entire roleplay we worked on together because he made all the graphics and left the page empty and blank while i was at work and couldn’t do anything about it. him and his boyfriend would call me names, made fun of me when i confided in them and came out as bisexual and told me i was just looking for attention and many other fucking instances where i was made to feel like shit. every time i called him out about stuff he did or said at all, i had to deal with abuse from in person and because i didn’t know how to approach the situation or deal with it, i let him get away with treating other people in the rpc like trash.

cameron and i grew apart after he quit the rpc. he ran out of aliases to use to destroy groups and i was working on actively trying to get out of the wake of destruction him and the friend group that yes, i followed around, left behind. i put forth the effort to work on learning about racism more in depth, i went to therapy to deal with the assaults and stuff i was going through and i used writing to cope with it and found a solid group of people that were actually decent. i admit that i was part of the problem by not saying anything to cameron, i was terrified of him and losing the only friend i had in my real life at the time. i know what he did hurt a lot of people in the rpc, including now the anon, and i realize that my silence until much later was not of any help at all. my activism now isn’t performative--- i’ve tried so hard over the last few years to learn and educate myself on the blm movement and i’m still learning every day. my intentions and heart have never been malicious and i deeply apologize to you, oksi, if you read this because i know it’s you that sent that anon. i’m sorry that my silence and lack of maturity and balls to confront cameron hurt you and i’m sorry for being a part of the problem. i’m sorry to whoever knew me back then and saw the people i surrounded myself with and that i was so focused on fitting in and belonging to a group (even a really fucking shitty one) stop me from speaking up when it mattered the most. i wish that this had been addressed to me privately so i could’ve talked to her and heard her side of the story but i understand that she probably felt uncomfortable and unsafe given our past and who she used to associate me with. i do not and will not ever stand for racism, i’m working every single fucking day to learn and spread resources and educate myself and to not overstep my boundaries or talk over the black community because it’s NOT my place. i can’t speak for the other person mentioned in this post and i hope she comes forward if she feels inclined to and tell her side of the story but this is mine. holding myself accountable for being a part of the problem. 

i’m sorry if any of this upset anyone and if this means i’m going to lose friendships or mutuals over this. i understand and it’s fine. i’m not looking to victimize myself at all and i’m admitting to the fact that i was complacent and silent and i’m really sorry. i’m not like that anymore and i’m always one of the first people to call horrible shit out, probably too much because i spent so much time NOT saying anything out of fear. and if you read any of this, thank you? i don’t know what this is going to do but i hope it helps shed light on my side of the story. again, oksi, i’m really fucking sorry- you don’t have to forgive me at all and i don’t expect you to but i hope you’ll at least hear this out and try to understand i’ve changed and i actively try every single day to be better than i used to be. thank you and sorry again.

#idk what to tag this under but #i hope people read it #i'm just gonna leave for a bit now

[nctzendreamz]

Crazy, Rich, and They Hate Me :: Part Four

Jaehyun x Reader Ft. NCT

Angst, fluff

A/N: The picture used to describe your fashion has nothing to do with your race or body type! It is only meant to show what you have on. Y/N is YOU! You are beautiful and goregeous and amazing. <333333

First you found out your boyfriend was rich, and now, as you approached the large mansion that was complimented with thousands of different plants and flowers, you definitely knew Jasmine’s parents were rich as well.

You slowly approached the large double doors. It was such a simple object, but it was still the most beautiful door you had ever seen. The buzzing of the doorbell made it even more memorable.

“Who is it!” A sqeaky, but familiar voice spoke through the intercom.

“It’s Y/N.” You yelled, trying to hold back a giggle. You heard a couple of locks becoming unhinged, and felt your eyes pop out of your head when you saw your friend. “Oh my goodness.” You whispered, immediately running into her arms and squeezing the life out of her.

“You literally look exactly the same! How is that possible!” She screeched as the two of you jumped around in a circle.

“Me? You look even younger than you did when we first met.”

“Woah.” You said in reference to the all white scenery in her humble abode, complimented with spurts of blue and yellow. “This is...this is beautiful. You live here?”

“That’s what I said when I first came to move in. I thought I put in the wrong address.”

Two twin boys crept around the corner, catching your attention quickly. “Hi!” You said in a sweet tone.

“Hello.” They said in unison.

“Cousins.” She said with a bright smile on her face.

“Oh.” You cooed. “Words cannot describe how happy I am for you, Jas. Like this is literally your dream come true.”

“Thank you so much, Y/N. Now enough with the emotional buisness. Let’s eat!” She clapped, prompting you to follow her into the large kitchen where her large family sat. You could already tell which one was her mom. They looked like twins.

“Mrs. Kim.” You ran to her, bowing.

“You must be Y/N.” She smiled. “I’ve heard so much about you since we got our precious Jasmine back.”

“Yeah. Too much.” A long haired male choked.

“Shut up, Heechul.” Jasmine spat.

“Haven’t I already told you, you want no parts of me?”

“Excuse those two.” Her mother interrupted. “Heechul has no filter. Please sit.”

You sat down in the large chair, stomach growling at all the food that was infront of you. “Don’t mind if I do. Hi cutie!”

It was one of the twins from earlier. You just wanted to squeeze his cheeks. “I’m not cute. I’m handsome.” He said with his chest out.

Heechul sighed dramatically, putting the last piece of food he wanted on his plate “In a world where I live, I think you’re neither.”

“Shut up.” The other twin said.

“Yeah!”

“I will fill your room with every thing you’re terrified of.”

“Heechul will you please stop threatening the children!” Jasmine yelled.

“Will you get a job?”

You didn’t know what to do, and when everyone at the table began to laugh exactly the same, you were even more confused.

“Excuse them.” An older man said at the head of the table. Jasmine’s dad. Even in the early morning, his clothing was still luxurious. Silk pajamas complimented with what you assumed was his initials. “Please.” He motioned towards the food on the table. You put everything they had on your plate, and began to eat.

“This is so delicious.” You moaned out, taking a moment to truly appreciate the fine cuisine.

“Yeah whatever.” Heechul scoffed. “Let’s talk about why you’re here.” He smirked, “Looking for love? A one night stand to remember?”

“First and foremost, she’s not thirsty like you. Secondly, there are kids here, and lastly, Y/N has a boyfriend. That’s why she’s here.” Jasmine winked at you from across the table.

“Wait...you have a boyfriend? With that outfit?”

You couldn’t help but snort even though you were being roasted.

“I happen to like the casual look. It’s different.” Mrs. Kim said.

“Yes. His cousin is getting married this weekend and I was invited as his plus one.”

“He’s Korean?”

“Yup.” Your smile couldn’t be brighter thinking about Jaehyun. You knew if you looked at your phone you would find a text from him, telling you how much he missed you.

“What’s his name, by the way?” Jasmine questioned as she put some kimchi in her mouth.

“Jaehyun.” You said calmly.

Suddenly everyone in the room froze. Jasmine choked on her food, the twins dropped their forks, and Heechul looked as if he could pass out.

“Woah woah woah...Jaehyun who?”

“Jaehyun Jung...” you trailed off suspiciously, eyeing everyone closely.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Heechul gasped. “You’re dating Jung Jaehyun? Like top bachelor Jung Jaehyun?”

“Rich as fuck Jung Jaehyun? Like richer than anybody in South Korea?”

“We’re rich.” Her dad said, leaning across the table. “They’re richer.”

“He’s pretty.” The twins said in unison.

“Girl! His family literally built the Seoul we know today. They got old stacks! How did you meet him?”

“We met back in LA. I went to this festival that I didn’t want to go to, and I met him.”

Heechul looked more offended than you had ever seen someone. “Why are you so calm? You do realize that Johnny and Rose getting married is the equivalent of the Royal Wedding here, don’t you?”

“Really?” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing.

“Yes!” They all yelled together.

“Wait, does this mean that you’re going to the dinner tonight?” Jasmine whispered.

“Yeah. I finally get to meet his mom.” You sighed.

“Are you changing your clothes?”

“Wel I figured it was nothing wrong with this.” You picked at your clothing one by one.

“Uh uh girl.” Jasmine said, getting up from the table, Heechul right on her heels. “I will not let you fumble the bag like this. Get up.”

“What’s wrong with my outfit?”

“Everything.” Heechul said, grabbing your wrist and dragging you upstairs.

Two hours had passed filled with you being forced to try on different outfits. There had been so many that you liked, but according to Jas and Heechul, it wasn’t perfection.

“Family, I think we found the one!” He yelled, clapping his hands in excitement.

You couldn’t deny it. This outfit was absolutely a killer. You felt yourself getting hot just from looking at yourself.

“Woah.” The twins gasped.

“Isn’t it so her, but not bummy at the same time?” Jas squealed.

“I have to say guys, I’m thoroughly impressed.” You said, twirling around.

“I wish I could see the look on Jaehyun’s face when he sees you.” Heechul dragged. “Unfortunately I have a date to get ready for.”

“So you don’t want to ride with us? After all this hard work?” You fake pouted.

“Well since you’re begging...” he trailed off.

“To the Jung mansion we go!” Jas yelled.

.............................

“Did you put in the right address?”

“I think so.”

“I mean, it makes sense.” Heechul explained. “You can’t be the richest family in South Korea and then live on the main road. It’s not logical.”

“True.” You and Jas said in unison.

“Shit. Are those guards?”

“Don’t worry.” You said confidently, remembering what Jaehyun told you to say. When you pulled up, you rolled down your window. “Good evening, sir.”

“Who are you.”

“Rude.” Heechul said from the back seat.

“Y/N. Y/N L/N.”

“Boys we got a Y/N L/N here.” He said through his shoulder walkie talkie.

“Let her through.” The other man said.

“It’s your lucky day.” He smiled before signaling for the double j gate to be opened.

“Holy shit.” Jas breathed out as you drove around the long driveway.

You know you said Jas had the nicest house you had ever seen, but that was all in the trash now. This was the definition of a masterpiece. Everything about it screamed royalty. So many people were getting dropped off by their valets. You felt like you were in Hollywood. No, this was better than Hollywood.

“You’re actually dating a Jung. Like what the hell.”

“Yes I am.” You said in a scared tone. Suddenly all the pressure was trying to crush you. As you stepped out the car, a goregeous smile made you lose your breath. “Jae.” You whispered. In moments like these, it was like the only person who could hear him was you. He was in a velvet suit, complimented with a wrist watch you were for sure cost more than anything you had ever bought.

“Damn.” He came up to you, kissing you softly. “You look so damn good.”

You felt like a middle schooler as you couldn’t help but stutter. “Me? No..no...that’s you.” He kissed you again, and you could care less who was looking. You were on top of the world right now.

A loud horn interrupted your smooch, and also scared you to death.

“Sorry.” Jas said, leaning across the passengers seat. “Slipped.” She cleared her throat, and you knew what she wanted.

“Jaehyun this is my friend that I went to go see earlier. Jasmine. And her cousin Heechul is in the back.”

“We dressed her.” He said with a childish smile on his face.

“Oh really?” Jaehyun questioned. “Well I think it would be pretty rude of me to not invite two people with such great taste to the party.”

“Oh no.” Jas sang. “We should get home. You know... it’s dark and I can’t see.”

“You sure?” Jaehyun smirked, his dimples making an appearance.

“Well, you know I guess it wouldn’t hurt to stay a couple of minutes? You know?”

“Yes. Just a few minutes.”

“Stay as long as you like.”

The two of them laughed awkwardly, clearly starstruck.

“Let’s go in, shall we?” He opened his arms for you to wrap your own around, and you allowed him to lead you inside. You couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of Heechul and Jasmine going in the trunk to change out of their pajamas.

His house was the definition of a dream. You felt like you were dreaming.

“You really do look so beautiful, baby.” He whispered in your ear, kissing it softly.

“Are you trying to rile me up so soon?”

“Maybe.”

“Well well well.” A voice called out. A red haired boy was approaching you and your boyfriend. You didn’t know whether he was Lucas or Yuta, but you knew he was one of them because he was on complete model status right now.

“Yuta.” Jaehyun spoke. “Surprised you’re here on time.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m not always late.”

“Hi.” You smiled.

“Well hello, beautiful.” He grabbed both of your hands and kissed each one. “You must be the Y/N I’ve heard so much about.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you too.”

“Like?”

“That you’re a model.”

“Oh babygirl.” A deeper voice spoke. “We’re not just ‘a model’, we’re the models.”

“Never forget it.” Yuta added on, fist bumping his brother.

“Lucas.” He introduced himself.

“And on that note.” Jaehyun grabbed your hand, leading you away. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. They’re fun.” You said in a child like manner.

“You ready to meet my mom?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” You took a deep breath, allowing your boyfriend to open the kitchen door for you.

“You’re fired!” A slender woman yelled. “I asked you to do one simple thing, and you can’t even do it. Get out.”

“What? I did it perfectly!”

“Not perfect enough. Goodbye!” She snatched the bowl out of his hands, and started to finish making whatever was in it.

“Mother.” Jaehyun spoke softly.

She looked up, angry eyes softening at the sight of her son. “Oh Jaehyun. You look so handsome.” She quickly ran and hugged him, clearly not realizing you were in the room as well.

“This is my girlfriend, Y/N.” He said, grabbing your hand.

She took your hands from his, sqeezing them. “Oh...nice to meet you...Y/N.”

“Nice to meet you too! I’ve heard so many good things about you and I’ve been so excited to meet you.”

“I’m gonna let you two spend a little time together.” Jaehyun smiled, secretly sqeezing your behind affectionately before walking back to the party.

“So...how long have you been dating my son?” Her demeanor was much different now. She wasn’t evil, but you could tell she didn’t play about Jaehyun.

Your smile still dazzled. “Two years.”

“Really?” It wasn’t a question. More of a statement. “What do you do for a living?”

“I do hair. I’ve been working at a salon for almost theee years now.”

She moved back to her bowl, where she no longer felt the need to keep eye contact with you. “Is doing hair your passion?”

“100%. One day I want to open up my own salon, or maybe even do hair for celebrities. One step at a time though.” You laughed, she didn’t.

“How do expect to pay for that? You certainly don’t expect my son to, do you?”

“Absolutely not.” You answered quickly. “I actually didn’t know how rich you guys were until like yesterday.” Once again, she didn’t find your jokes amusing. Why was this so difficult? What were you saying wrong? “I would never ask him to pay for anything for me.”

“He paid for you to get here.”

“I had no idea.” You sighed in defeat.

“Hm.” Was all she said. You were about to try and ask about her, but someone came in. “Mrs. Jung, your husband would like to speak with you. He’s on the phone.”

She didn’t even excuse herself. She simply left. You needed a drink. Actually, you needed Jaehyun.

“How did it go?” He questioned as you approached him at the bar.

“She hates me.” You pouted, putting your face on his shoulder.

“No one can hate you. She was probably just irritated because of the guy she fired.” In reality, Jaehyun had no idea.

“That poor guy.”

“I warned you.” He kissed your forehead. “But don’t worry. She’ll warm up.”

You wanted to tell him about the fact that she seemed disgusted with your life choices, and also question why he wasn’t more surprised, but Johnny approached him before you could.

“I need help bringing in some drinks. Mind if I steal him?” He winked.

“Not at all.” You sighed. The minute Jaehyun was gone, you dumped your head on the bar.

“It’s frustrating isn’t it.” A voice spoke. When you turned around, you saw a face that you didn’t know could exist. He was unreal. “Trying to impress her only to have her shut you out.”

“Are you married to one of them?” You were hoping to make a friend who survived this, getting a chuckle out of the slim boy.

“She’s my aunt, but my parents are just like her. I could make a billion dollars and they still wouldn’t be satisfied because it wasn’t two.”

“That’s not cool.”

“What do you do for a living anyways? How much property do your parents have?”

“None.” You whispered embarrassingly. “I’m a hairstylist.”

“Even better.” He smiled, taking the last sip of his drink. “If it makes you happy, that’s all that matters. I think I’m the only one in this family that understands that.”

“Where there’s one, there can be many more.”

“True. Taeyong, by the way.”

“Y/N.”

“I know. We all do.”

“Great.” You sighed in defeat. “Just great.”

.....................

“So, how did it go.” Johnny questioned as they closed the truck that held the last of the alcohol.

“Bad. I think. I should’ve did more to protect her. When she told me, I didn’t really sound like I cared even though I do. My mom is just-”

“Scary as shit.” Johnny finished for him.

“Exactly.”

“Johnny, may I have a moment with my son?”

“Yes ma’am.” He said, looking more terrified that Jaehyun had ever seen him. He ran away quickly.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes. I just wanted to tell you that your dad doesn’t think he’ll be able to make it.” Her voice was filled with sorrow.

“Oh.” Jaehyun sounded just as defeated. “Is he okay?”

“Yeah. Just got scheduled for more meetings. You know how it goes.”

He didn’t respond, deciding to listen to the sounds of nature around him.

“So about this Y/N girl.”

“I love her.” Jaehyun said before she could say anything else.

“Right.” She sighed.

“Did you not like her?”

“I just want what’s best for you. I don’t want you to end up with someone who’s only with you because of your last name or your looks.”

“Mama.” He grabbed her hands in his. “You raised me to be able to see who was using me and who wasn’t. Y/N didn’t even know about us and our wealth for two years straight. She loves me for me. I promise. I wouldn’t have brought her to you if I thought otherwise.”

“You’re right.” She shook her head. “Sorry for being so paranoid.

“It’s okay.” He took his mother in his arms, holding her tightly. “Just know that she won’t hurt me. And that I have good taste.”

“You said the same thing about Yuna.”

“When I was barely a man. It’s different this time. I mean it.”

“I know.” She said. She didn’t mean it though. If she had anything to do with it, you wouldn’t be together by the end of this wedding.

#nct #nct 127 #nct imagine #nct scenario #jaehyun #nct reaction #nct masterlist #nct fluff #nct angst

[i-am-parsec]

Unaddressed Letters - Part V

                                                           Leaving Jacksonville - part I

The night they leave is warm and quiet. End of the summer, the streets downtown are still fairly crowed after the sun goes down, Stacy has some costumers roaming around the thrift shop while Chase, just across the street, sweats in the kitchen of a Mexican restaurant, trying to leave no meat uncooked and no drink without ice.

During a brief moment of precious spare time, he checks his phone.

“Call me when you are done with the dishes, kitchen boy" reads the screen.

His heart skips a beat and he frowns. Of course she’s texting him, they are friends. They go back home together every single night after work. This is not something worth a heart-beat skipping, when the fuck is his brain going to get the memo?

He can’t continue his internal screaming - those burritos aren’t going to make themselves.

The young girl puts her phone away as an old man approaches the counter. Dark eyes, whitening short brown hair, a full goatee and about two heads taller than her. He doesn’t look scary per se, but neither does he look friendly and yet Stacy is invaded by an strange feeling of warm comfort when met by this unknown client and ponders, for a second, why. When it clicks, her hands freeze. She keeps her gaze glued on the light blue shirt she’s bagging, choking back the tears. It’s always like this, something ordinary, unimportant, pulls the trigger and the pain rushes to her eyes. She manages to snap out of it, but not without the man noticing.

“Is everything okay, ma’am?”

Fuck, even his voice is similar. She fails at smiling and looks away.

“Yes, sir, it’s just…you look a lot like...uh, my dad. Well, not a lot, it’s mostly the beard...I think…”

As she looks down, it’s impossible to deny the burn in her throat and the shaking of her hands. Not now, please, not here. Crying during working hours in a thrift shop that’s probably – totally – laundering drug money.

Well, that’s a new low.

“Did you lose him recently?” asks the man gently, prompting her to look up.

“No, I…I lost him when I was kid. He was shot…a robbery gone wrong…”

He nods, no trace of pity in his features, only compassion and understanding. Maybe he lives in town, maybe he also lost someone in the hands of the corrupted and greedy. Maybe he knows this pain too.

“I’m sorry to tell you, darling, that it won’t ever stop hurting, especially in your case, a loss so unfair, but let me tell you this…” the old man stops for a second, and then, with more conviction than Stacy has ever witnessed in her entire life “…you are strong enough to handle this and any other nonsense that life throws at you. You just gotta remember that, always."

Her phone buzzes for a long minute but she doesn’t pick up. She’s still holding her breath when he gives her the money. She wants to tell him to not worry about it, the shirt is on her, but with such a tight budget, every cent counts. All she can do is smile and thank him.

Another call. She tries her best to sound calm but Chase can tell something's wrong in the tiredness of her "hey". She explains quickly, hoping to ease his friend's mind - he's already anxious mess by default, wouldn't want to fuel it up - and after repeating at least ten times "yes, Chase, I swear I'm ok now", she sighs and then asks.

"Can we go down to the bar tonight?"

There's a second of silence. She hates drinking or, to be more precise, she hates seeing him drinking. She claims he likes it a bit too much for his own good. She continues.

"I'll hurry up and close this dumpster in a minute, and then we go straight down to Joe's, what do you say?"

He knows what his friend is doing, she's avoiding herself, avoiding the thinking, the pain and honestly, he can't blame her. He's been there, done that, and she always stayed by his side whenever he went into Emotionless Drunk Mess mode, so he has no problem returning the favor now.

"I say I'm covered in sweat, blood and other unknown bodily fluids so maybe we go home and take a shower first?"

When she laughs, he feels his heart become a little lighter.

"First of all: ew, gross; secondly: We take shower? Are you suggesting we take it together, Brody?"

And there it is, that's the Stacy he knows and loves - a teasing smart ass. This time though, he doesn't let her words fluster him - too much - and attacks back.

"Of course, Walters, we gotta do it for the environment's sake, you know? We gotta save water!"

"Oh, yeah, totally, that’s why, it has nothing to do with you dying to see me naked."

"I feel so insulted you would even dare to think that, young lady, I am a gentleman!"

"Oh, sure thing, perv. Okay, I'll finish here and meet you outside in a bit."

The smile on his face lingers all the way until he sees her walking out the store. He nods curiously at the bag on her hand. She smiles like a kid planning a prank and simply winks.

“I’m just borrowing a little something.”

“Uh, yeah, that’s called stealing, Stacy.”

She chuckles and then, as she usually does, starts a fire in his chest with just a short phrase.

“Don’t judge me, I just want to look pretty for our date.”

She’s joking, Brody, she’s fucking joking, like all friends do.

Just as they get to their stop, their bus arrives.

“This must be our lucky night” exclaims Stacy surprised. Once they are settled in their seats, she rests her head  on his shoulder and grabs his hand. Chase simply does his best to not suffer a stroke.

“We have to get out of here, dude. Soon.”

“That’s the plan” stutters the young man, wishing he could sound a bit less nervous by something that they have been doing for years now.

“Yeah, I know, but we always talk about it as a goal in the future and I…I don’t know. I feel like we shouldn’t wait too long or we might end up never leave this town” mutters Stacy with a sudden grim tone.

“Don’t say that, dude, of course we are doing it,” says her friend as her grabs her chin, looking for her eyes, all awkwardness replaced by the imperative need to bring her smile back “we promised we would, didn’t we?”

She nods half-heartedly and snuggles up against him, like a lost dog hides from the rain under a frail tree. As he hugs her, bringing her closer, he whispers against her dark hair: “Let’s set a date.”

“For our wedding? Sorry, Brody, but you haven’t even proposed to me yet” she jokes dryly.

Ignoring the sudden rush of heat on his body, he replies: “No, dumbass, for our escape!”

She come out of her shelter and looks at him with a hint of excitement on her eyes.

“A date?”

“Yeah, a date. Tell me when you want to leave.”

She bites her lower lip - one of her many quirks that drives him insane - and inhales slowly. As she breathes out, she answers: “End of this year. That should give us enough time to save a decent amount of money, make a good plan and maybe find a place to rent.”

“Well, end of the year it is. December 31 we are getting the fuck out of Jacksonville.”

And when he laughs, she feels the whole world become a little lighter.

More info, previous chapters, tag list AND HEADCANONS under the cut

First and foremost, I apologize for any mistakes in the chapter. This one wasn’t proof-read either and on top of that I wrote it on a rush but hopefully it’s decent ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

All chapters in chronological order, here. Previous chapter, here. Next chapter, here.

SO, yes, this is a two-part chapter - truth be told, I’m only posting this now and not both parts as one since I’m quite busy and have no time to finish writing it but I still wanted to post something now as, idk, a christmas special???? whatever, I just wanted to post it, lol

Anyways, HEADCANON TIME:

* As you may have noticed in the last chapter, Chase and Stacy’s daughter - Esperanza (which, by the way, means Hope in Spanish) - has a VERY Latino name, well, that’s because my hc is that Stacy is latina! Well, half latina, her mom is latina, her dad is white and because Stacy is white-passing and her mom knew about the struggles of being a Latina woman in the US, Stacy’s parents decided to give her a very white first name, so she would have it “easier” in life. Spoiler alert: she didn’t have it easier in life. Like, at all.

* Despite that, she still has a very Latino second name - Dolores (which means Pains in Spanish *winkwink*) - that she loves just as much as she loves her Latino heritage, and that’s why she named her daughter like that - Chase 100% loves the name as well.

* This is kinda spoilerish (because I will explore this headcanon in far more depth later on the fic) but I still feel you guys should know: Before they were the best of friends, Henrik and Chase were penpals - they met through an elementary school penpal project and kept writing each other all the way until adulthood, when they finally met face to face.

* Neither Chase or Stacy had pets - or were allowed to have any - by the time they became friends, but they both love animals and started feeding a cat they always came across on their way to school. They named the cat Sam.

* Stacy is allergic to cats. She loved Sam from a distance.

* Chase knows quite a bit of Spanish Stacy taugh him. She didn’t teach him just for funsies but because she ended up getting him a job in a Mexican restaurant and the owners didn’t speak English. She was very impressed by how easy it was for him to get used to the Latino enviroment and how good he turned out to be at cooking.

* Chase knows Stacy likes her second name better than her first, but sucks at pronuncing it correctly so he only call her Dolores jokingly andsometimeswhentheyhavesex

* They weren’t each others “first”, but Stacy told Chase after they did it for the first time that she had never enjoyed sex before him (and Chase almost cried because of such huge compliment).

* Esperanza is fluent in Spanish and English and knows a bit of German thanks to Uncle Henrik. Henrik is also Esperanza’s godfather.

I have way more headcanons but all of them are incredibly spoilery, so this is all you get for now. Now let’s move on to the next chap-

❤  Tag list ❤: @amyxmiaplay, @beck-pma, @closedworldofmathiel, @darktrash-drash, @fanfictionrecommendations-com, @flyingfishflopsthings, @fruitycasket, @happysingingturtles, @hiimizzyxoxo, @hishex, @kitnkas, @mcomegalletas, @mijako98, @mjjau, @mysterious-cupcake-ninja, @mysticalanimallover, @novasingalaxies, @plutoandpolaris, @probablyghosting, @randomartdudette, @saltyweirdbi, @sassy-in-glasses, @scarlet--raven, @septicuniverse, @skyewardlight, @thevampireauthoress, @youllnevertaketheskyfromme

Thank you so much for reading, hope you enjoyed it! If you did, please reblog, that helps me a lot ❤

#Chase Brody #Stacy Brody #Unaddressed Letters #Jacksepticeye #Antisepticeye #Henrik Von Schneepletein #Dr. Schneeplestein #Fanfic #JSE #fanfiction #JSE egos #JSE community #therealjacksepticeye

[cjwallflower]

Philip’s duel

Word Count: 2514 words

Genre: Angst

Warnings: TW, death, blood, swearing

Philip sighed as he looked up at the overcast sky. It was a boring day, but he knew tomorrow would be better. He was planning on proposing to his long term girlfriend, Theodosia Burr Alston, after 3 years. Philip smiled as he felt the small box in his pocket, but his smile dropped when he heard his father’s name. He turned to see a man he vaguely knew as George Eacker up on a parapet, preaching to a crowd, and abusing his father’s name. Philip grew angry and stormed over.

“Hey! What are you saying about my father?!” he yelled, silencing the crowd and even the man who’d been slandering his father’s name.

But the corners of Eacker’s lips turned up into an amused and all the more aggravating smirk. “Your... father?” he asked, placing a hand on his hip and sneering at the shorter boy, who glared more.

“Yeah. What. Did you say. About. My. Father?!” Philip growled through gritted teeth.

Eacker suddenly burst out laughing, as did a few others. “You’re telling me, that you’re the son of that cowardly, good for nothing piece of shit who doesn’t deserve to live?!” he asked, wheezing.

Philip’s eyes were ablaze, and he only saw red as he punched Eacker square in the jaw. The whole crowd went silent. “Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is, then?” he growled lowly, and Eacker glared.

“Let’s talk over there” he said, and dragged Philip away from the crowd.

Philip would’ve usually been intimidated by that gesture, but he was too fuelled by anger. He growled up at Eacker, whose jaw was now bruising. “You. Me. Tomorrow at dawn. For a duel of gentlemen” he said through bared teeth, but was more infuriated when Eacker had that same shit eating smirk on his face and nodded. Furious, he glared hotly at Eacker, and pushed past him, going home. He had a duel to prepare for.

The door to Alexander’s study slammed open. The aforementioned man looked up from where he was grading tests, and was concerned when he saw his son with a murderously angry look in his eyes.

Philip only uttered three words as he met Alexander’s eyes. “Where’s the guns?”

Alexander’s eyes widened and he shook his head, as if awakening from a dream. “What?” he asked softly, and flinched as Philip got more angry.

“Where. Are. The. Guns?”

Alexander realised he’d heard his son correctly and started to shake a little, honestly terrified. He pointed to a safe in the wall. “I-In the s-safe..” he managed out as his son advanced to the safe. “Ph-Philip, wh-what’s going o-on?”

Philip spun the lock, glaring at it. “A man named George Eacker was smacking you around in the streets. I challenged him to a duel.” he cocked a gun, clicking it into safety. “And I’m not going to lose.”

Alexander’s mouth fell agape and he stood up. “What?! No! You-“ he tried to reason with his son, but Philip definitely wouldn’t let up on this one. “Just because someone says something bad about me doesn't me-“

Philip cut him off by meeting his eyes. Tears of anger were streaming down his face. “No! He went too far dad, I’m not gonna let it slide!” he exclaimed, making his father flinch again. This was scarily unlike the Philip Alexander had known for 19 years.

A beat of silence resonated between the two as they stared into each other's eyes.

In Alexander's eyes, there was fear. People often died in duels if shot in a really bad area, and Philip was only 19. He didn't have training, and though he was definitely smart enough to figure it out, Philip didn't even know how to fire the gun. But then he read the look in Philip's eyes, and tears welled in his own.

Philip's eyes had so many different emotions in them. First, foremost, and most prominent was anger. He wasn't angry at his father for trying to stop him, but he was too angry at Eacker to be stopped. Secondly, spite. This one was subtle, almost nonexistent, as Philip was never spiteful. The only reason Alexander recognised it was because that look was no stranger to Alexander's own iris, and he suddenly knew how it felt to be on the other side of that terrifying gaze. Finally, there was a flicker of fear, and Alexander realised that Philip didn't want to duel Eacker, but he wasn't going to let anyone hurt his father's name. Not whilst he was alive, that is. Alexander came to the realisation that he couldn't stop Philip no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how hard he tried, and pleaded, and reasoned with his son. Philip was going out to those duelling grounds, and not even God Himself could stop him.

Alexander sighed, hugging Philip tightly. "Take my guns, be smart" he warned.

Philip hugged back, bearing a smile. "I'll make you proud, Pops."

"You always do."

The next day, Philip awoke before the sun peeked over the horizon. He contemplated resuming his previous sleeping state, but as his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he sat up. The barrel of his father's pistol glimmered in the moonlight.

Philip got up with a soft sigh, looking in the mirror and smoothing down his wild curls and looking in the mirror as he got dressed. He slipped the small velvet box into his pocket, thinking to himself, 'I'm going to win this duel for the Hamilton name. I may as well if I'm going to bring another person into it'.

Philip pulled on his jacket, looking around and making sure he hadn't woken anyone up. He stopped in front of his parents' room, looking at them cuddling and sleeping peacefully. He smiled softly, sighing silently. "I'll make you proud, Pops. I love you, Mom. I'll see you after the duel" he whispered in the silence, and set off into the cold November dawn.

Eacker and his friend were there when Philip arrived with his friend and a doctor that both friends knew. George looked nervous in his eyes, but he still had that cocky grin on his face that made Philip's blood boil over. Despite his apparent anger, he attempted to be cordial with the man he'd soon shoot. "Mr. Eacker! How was the rest of your evening?" he asked, but glared when his attempted kindness was spat to the ground.

"I'd rather skip the pleasantries, let's go" Eacker growled.

"Fine by me."

Philip sighed as the pistols were mixed around and given to the men. Philip's friend looked at him. "Philip, can we just call this off?" he whispered lowly, but Philip didn't budge.

"Under no circumstances do you let him win this argument, got it?" Philip asked, and his friend sighed, approaching Eacker's friend.

As the two tried to negotiate, Eacker and Philip glared into each other's eyes. George was a little unsettled by the look of hatred, malice, and pure, unbridled rage in Philip's eyes, but George stood his ground like a man. In reality, Philip was more scared than Eacker, but his father had taught him the basics that he needed to know in order to win this battle. Both friends came back with the news that there would be no peace, and they were clear to duel. Philip took a deep breath as the men started counting to ten.

One.

Philip passed Eacker as they both took their first step. He closed his eyes, thinking about the advice his father gave him. 'Look him in the eye, aim no higher. Summon all the courage you require. Then slowly and clearly aim your gun towards the sky' Alexander's voice rang in his head.

Two.

Philip thought of said father, and how proud he'd be when he came home with his head held high. He'd pat Philip on the back, and tell him he did a good job. His father was already proud of him, but this would validate it even more. He smiled to himself. "I'll make you proud, Pops" he whispered.

Three.

Philip's mind flashed to his mother. She was already feeling down because of recent events. Most prominent of those events was grieving over the loss of her father, whom Philip was named for. A brief spot of doubt flashed in his mind. 'What if I end up dying in this duel?' he asked himself, but straightened up, nearly slapping himself. 'No. I'll come home for breakfast, and she'll cry with pride. I'm not gonna leave her.'

Four.

Philip then thought of all his younger siblings. He was the eldest, and when they needed someone to fight the monsters under the bed, he was always there. He was their brave soul who cradled them when they couldn't sleep, and sung them lullabies and told amazing stories during dinner. They all looked up to him, and he knew he'd live to protect them another day.

Five.

Philip thought about Aaron Burr, his girlfriend's father. Burr never liked him, and just tolerated his father. Philip was constantly threatened by Burr, and once almost lost his life due to a misunderstanding where Theo Jr had been crying over a book where an innocent's life had been taken, and Burr had thought Philip had hurt her. If he saw that Philip could hold his own, and defend against opposition, maybe he'd finally have Burr's stamp of approval. In that case, he had to make Burr proud, too.

Six.

Philip saw Theo Jr in his mind. The wind blowing her beautiful curls, the sun kissing her beautiful soft skin, her brown eyes sparkling in the sunset. He imagined her face when the moment came for him to get down on one knee. As he raised his gun to shoot to the air, he smiled. 'I have people to live for. I'm gonna win this. I'll make them all proud, and later, I'll propose to Theo, and it's gonna be so perfect. I love you so much, Theo'

Seven.

Eacker turned around and fired his gun.

Everything seemed to stop, the world stopped turning. The men stopped counting, the duelers stopped pacing, and Philip stopped thinking. Philip felt the bullet fly into side and get stuck in his right arm. He shakily looked down at the bullet wound, the blood oozing out, and he collapsed to the ground, quickly losing consciousness as the doctor rushed to his side.

The phone at the Hamilton household rang loudly, as Aaron Burr and his small family of three sat with Alexander in his living room, having tea. Eliza was still sleeping, so Alexander answered quickly before it woke his wife up.

"Hello, is this Alexander Hamilton?" asked a soft female voice. Alexander was uneasy.

"Yes, may I ask who's calling?"

“This is the receptionist at Orlando Hospital. I’m calling in regards to your son, Philip Hamilton. He has you listed as his emergency contact”

Remembering Philip had gone dueling, Alexander's eyes widened. "What's happened to Philip?"

The receptionist's next words felt like a spear had pierced his heart.

“He’s been shot in the side. We think it may be fatal”

Alexander dropped the phone in shock. Hearing the noise, Aaron looked over into the kitchen. "Alex? Alex, are you alright?" he asked gently.

Alexander turned to them, trembling with wide eyes that were welling with tears. "Ph-Philip's been.. shot.." he managed out.

Aaron's eyes widened and he jumped to his feet. "What?!" he asked. Theo Jr covered her mouth in shock, getting to her feet as well, tears pouring down her face. Aaron quickly pulled her and Alexander to his car to drive to the hospital.

As they approached the hospital, Theo tried desperately to wipe her tears, and she only had one thought on her mind.

'Stay Alive, Philip...'

The trio rushed into the waiting room, two of the three crying desperately. Alexander saw the doctor that had been at Philip's side at the time of the duel. Holding back a sob, Alexander rushed forward to see the doctor.

"Where's my son?!" he asked, gripping the doctor's shoulders. "Where the fuck is my son?!"

The doctor flinched, but recognised Alexander. "Mr. Hamilton, come in, they brought him in half an hour ago, he lost a lot of blood on the way over.

Theo ran over and joined them. "Is he alive?!" she cried desperately.

The doctor hesitated. “Yes, hes alive, but you have to understand, the bullet entered just above his hip and lodged in his right arm-“

Aaron cut him off, holding his daughter tightly. "We need to see him. Now."

The doctor led the three to Philip's room. "I’m doing everything I can, but the wound was already infected when he arrived" he said.

Theo sobbed into her father's chest. "Will he stay alive?!" she asked, but the doctor didn't answer her. If it weren't for Aaron holding her up, she'd have collapsed by now. It didn't help seeing Philip's blood splattered across the doctor's uniform.

They entered the room to see Philip in the hospital bed, festering and weak. He had a thin stream of blood leaking from his mouth, and his hands and clothes were drenched in his own blood, a terrifying sight to see. What was most unsettling was how leaking through the bandages was more blood, accompanied with a strange yellow colour. Theo cried and rushed to his side, holding his bloodstained hand. Philip's hazel eyes weakly opened. As he tried to talk, he choked out even more blood. He finally managed one word that broke Theo's heart when she heard his normally soft, cheerful voice now breaking as he lie on the brink of death.

"H...Hey..."

Theo sobbed harder, her heart clenching as she stared at him. Philip managed a weak, bloody smile, and he squeezed her hand, wincing in pain. Theo cupped his face gently, tears clouding her vision. "O-Oh... O-Oh dear god, Ph-Philip... Philip why..?" she asked softly, her heart aching as she stared at her dying boyfriend.

Philip's smile only widened painfully. “I-I showed h-him.. u-us H-Hamiltons.. w-we aren’t w-weak..w-we...aren't..c-cowards...” he whispered, closing his eyes.

Theo's eyes widened and she started sobbing. "Ph-Philip! No, don't go yet!" she cried.

Thankfully, Philip’s eyes opened a little. “I-I’m... still... h-here...” he croaked, coughing up more blood. Theo smiled softly at him, trying to stay calm. She couldn't control the flow of tears streaming down her face however.

Suddenly, the door burst open again. There, shaking and sobbing, was Eliza. “Philip!” she cried, hugging him tightly. Philip hugged back. “Wh-what happened? Wh-who shot you???” she sobbed.

“I-I.. got i-into a d-duel.. a m-man.. talked.. b-bad about.. P-Pops..” he managed out.

"M-Mom, I love you.." he wheezed weakly, and the room felt a bit brighter. He felt weaker. Lighter.

His pulse slowed to a stop, and the room was filled with sobbing.

#this was supposed to be short #my hand slipped #this is my first story #be gentle #philip hamilton #theodosia jr #george eacker #hamilton

[andy-clutterbuck]

WSC Atlanta 2017

I just tried to eat pineapple with a knife so I’m not sure how coherent this will be. I don’t think the majority of it has sunk in yet and it’s like I’m in some sort of con AU version of my life but I wanted to get it out while it’s all fresh.

I have to say first and foremost that no matter how I feel about TWD(and how this con is run) TWD cast is full of gems. I don’t have any heart eyes to spare but maybe Andy can lend them out every other weekend or something. Yeah I know they get paid to do this but some of that sincerity and warmth just can’t be faked, actor or not. Secondly, the lighting in my hotel room is god awful. Thirdly, this weekend wouldn’t have been what it was without my TiTTD fam. 

Friday:

I met Ross that evening when I went to check out the layout. He immediately stepped around the table to hug me before he even said anything. ❤️  He was so sweet. He’s very genuine and super easy to talk to. Plus he asked to hold my Pikachu phone case.

Saturday:

The first full day. I met Khary first and what really struck me is that he stands in front of his table like he just gets right out there to talk to you and again he immediately came in for a hug. The warmth just radiates off that dude. He is so full of life. He gave my Pikachu phone case more love.

I went to meet Norman because I promised @peggy-steve that I would get his autograph for her. Again, came right at me over the table for a hug. He was incredibly sincere and very soft spoken despite the utter insanity that constantly surrounds his booth.

I met Lennie next! He immediately wants to know about you and engages you in conversation. I think it would pretty impossible to be nervous around him because he just puts you at ease and he’s so lovely. So lovely.

I met @oldmangrimes // @mdgart !!!!!!!! 🙌🏻  I walked up to her booth and said something to the effect of “If I told you the trash was here would you know who you’re talking to?” She surprised me with this big, gorgeous, glittery print of the Andy art she did for me for my birthday last year. I came back on Sunday before I left to get a print of this because how could I not? It has two of my most favorite things: a curl curving around his ear and CHEST HAIR. FYI she’s just as lovely in person as she is on tumblr. 💖 💝

The last thing I did on Saturday was pop by to see Jon Bernthal for @bernthalus-christ so I could get him to hold up a birthday sign for her. Success! Her post is here 💙

*I was planning on meeting Danai and Lauren but the scheduling didn’t work 😒

Sunday:

Did you scroll past everything else to get here? I don’t blame you. Holy early day, Batman. The panel was great I think everyone knows that. We were sitting in the 5th row! The first thing I did when Andy came out on stage after saying “That’s a good shirt.” was notice that my hands were shaking. My eyes were also sporadically welling up with tears which was aggravating. I love that Andy is 44 years old and still listens to his mom and dad about not swearing. 😂

@ricky-grimes took some A+ Andy photos that I will be editing once she uploads them 😻  😛

Andy op time. Mess™ Like a legit mess. And when the dude who runs the whole damn con comes strolling in like a douche and doesn’t tell a fuck ton of exasperated people what’s even going on.....ANYWAY ops are super fast so luckily you don’t really have time to freak out you just have to move. So I just opened my arms to him and he opened his and went “Yeaaaahhhh!!” Now let be trash for second but his body is hard. I didn’t expect him to be squishy but the dude is solid. Also the Santa beard is soft, it touched the side of my face and I didn’t even feel any roughness at all. He’s so beautifully proportioned...sorry moving on. We both said thank you and off I went. Here I am internally screaming legit 😂 : My digital download is MIA so terrible lighting and the reflection of my hand is all I can do right now. We’re not gonna talk about that 4th Freddy Cougar that happened just before I got in there ok....Andy legit wore 87 hats though.

@packt and I finally met up before Andy’s autograph! She had these gorgeous coins created for the cast and was I’m super honored that she wanted to give me because they’re amazing and I’m going to treasure it forever. 💜 💙 ❤️ I’m truly amazed by the wonderful people I’ve met through running this blog.

Andy’s autograph. I got in line and when @mamagrimes6 found me she was going to just go back so she wasn’t cutting in line but I wasn’t having that 😂  I very vocally stated that no I needed her and @ricky-grimes with me I wasn’t doing this alone. I was going to fight someone if they gave us shit but they both got in line with me without an issue. 🙊  We were at the very front of the gold line so the panic set in pretty damn fast. I couldn’t even look at him for the short amount of time that we could before we got up there. It legitimately felt like staring at the sun, that’s the only way I can put it, like it stings so you flinch away. Or a really handsome version of Medusa. I imagine that’s not a totally uncommon thing but when you spend as much time as I do staring at his face in photoshop it’s pretty amusing. I actually texted my friend and told her it was like I was just seeing him for the first time, I was legit shook. 😖  I could feel my heart beating in my chest and I got really short of breath, I wasn’t even sure that I was going to be able to say anything without sounded winded or something. I gave him my silver fox hat to sign and I managed to choke out some version of thanking him for all the goodness he puts out into the world because it’s really helped me, I don’t really remember exactly what I said, and he said “Oh wow.” and that he’s just trying to spread a love bomb to the world 😂  which is such and Andy thing to say and it’s so true. He put his hand up for a highfive so I gave him one and he held onto my hand for a moment. Said our thank yous again and I proceeded so quickly out of the curtain the volunteer chuckled at me. 

If you were at WSC you may have several silver foxes around because it was a thing we did.

I finished my day/con experience with the Kingdom panel and it was a great choice. Cooper, Lennie, and Khary were just wonderful and hilarious, it couldn’t have ended on a more upbeat note.

It’s sporadically sinking in. I think I’ve teared up two or three times tonight. It may sound silly but I just want to thank everyone for their support. Just to have so many people understand the way I feel and be happy and supportive has been so amazing. Also I cannot stress enough how utterly gorgeous Andy is ok? Like no picture, no video, nothing truly matches the real thing in the flesh. That’s my bean and I can’t believe i actually met him 😖

#blarg #wall of text #i hope i didn't forget anything im running on little sleep #i also got super lost in a massive parking garage that looked like a twd set but #it's late now but whatever :]

[ramblingalexfinallywrites]

(Im the pan anon with depression and the rude mom, if you remember me.) Could I ask for a positivity message from Mic? I have a few problems with social anxiety (and by a few I actually mean A LOT) And I started working at a coffee shop, a religious coffee shop and it was going fine but then things got busy and the boss was giving out criticisms, and asking me where I go to church, I told him that I worship by myself. (1/2)

(2/2 -coffee shop anon) And he started asking if I believed that the bible is always right and I don’t wanna lose this job and so I told him yeah but if I’m honest I’m not very religious and I left church because of how they were treating other people. And he was all like “well the bible says don’t forsake your congregations” And I’m shaking man I can’t stop thinking about how judgemental he sounded and how backhanded all of it sounded and I’m freaking out

Holy crap, I’m really sorry, I’ve been misreading this since I got it; I thought you were asking for a request, not a positivity message. I’m really sorry this is coming so late, I hope this helps in some way ❤️

“Hiya listener, thanks for writing in. This is one heck of a situation; I can’t imagine how terrifying this must be for you. First off, you did a bomb job handling the situation at the moment. Nicely done!

“Now, secondly, I get not wanting to lose the job; money is hella important especially in this economy. If you can keep it on the down-low, I’d suggest looking at other options in and around your area where you might be able to make the same amount of cash for less emotional hassle. You don’t need to be fearing for your job just because of the way you choose to practice your religion. Isn’t it illegal to discriminate against that kind of stuff anyway? I’d look into it just in case.

“Lastly, don’t you worry about what other people think when it comes to you figuring out how you wanna worship. If it’s by yourself in the privacy of your own home, that’s your choice and it’s just as valid and fine by the being(s) upstairs as whatever way your boss chooses to do his worshiping. If he’s gonna be an ass about it, you deserve better. Take care of you, first and foremost!”

- Present Mic

#present mic #yamada hizashi #positivity

[rinusagitora]

Her hands in ours.

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Characters: Shouto Todoroki, Momo Yaoyorozu, Kyouka Jirou, All Might, Class 1-A

Pairings: TodoMomoJirou, mentioned Izuchaco

Words: 4,500+

Summary: WARNINGS-- mentioned familial abuse. Momo is the definition of perfect. Everything is a mess without her. Thus, when Momo finally confesses her love to Kyouka Jirou, Shouto's entire day is screwed over.

AO3 | FFN

The uppermost echelon of heroes was nothing impressive. Maybe All Might aside, as he seemed genuinely concerned for the good of people and to Izuku. But throughout his life he was in proximity to the top five heroes with some frequency, and all he learned was that they were first and foremost human, and secondly had private lives like his father revolving around self-serving agendas.

By extension, his classmates were equally unimpressive until he met Izuku.

Izuku Midoriya, and then Momo Yaoyorozu.

He never really noticed Momo until their practical exam. She was bouncy and well-liked, if not somehow timid at the same time, but her brilliance caught his eye.

They gravitated the moment they started talking. So much so they spent their afternoons in the campus library studying together. Not necessarily as an exchange, like those study groups Momo held with the classroom-challenged, but in each other’s presence. He never really had trouble concentrating but Momo’s presence somehow exorcised the pressure Endeavor forced on him over the years. She smelled the books. The ambience of her highlighter squeaking across yet another molecular textbook was meditative, like rainfall on tin.

That was a fancy way of saying he was crushing on Momo like they were back in primary school, but he liked to keep things kind of classy.

He apparently wasn’t the only one soothed by Momo. He briefly glanced to them, Kyouka’s head laid in Momo’s lap as they read. Momo was popular and affectionate, Kyouka didn’t leave him with the same impression. He wasn’t exactly fluent in the subtle exchanges of teenage girls, but he wasn’t blind either.

But, he reasoned, he could also be jealous of their proximity. There were times flashes like film reel of Momo’s hand in his, Momo’s fingers in his hair as their noses brushed together, interrupted his focus. He found himself by Momo’s desk in the morning just to say hi. When his phone buzzed, he whipped it out with record-breaking speed and had to bite his lip to keep himself from smiling in the cases it was Momo messaging him with a cool-looking molecule or her pet gerbil.

But, again, he wasn’t fluent in girl. It could be just a friend thing. Gals being pals. That kind of thing.

His reverie was interrupted again by Kyouka stretching. “Thanks for keeping me, but I gotta go. I’ll see you later Yaomomo. Bye, Todoroki-kun.”

“Bye, Kyou-chan. See you tomorrow.” Momo’s arms slipped around Kyouka’s shoulders and they squeezed each other. “It’s icy out there. Don’t break something.”

Momo sighed as she turned back to her books. She was pretty, her dark eyes hooded as she diligently read. Her eyelashes were long, her hair was sleek and shiny in the glow cast by the LED lights above their heads. Her smile was even prettier. Momo disassociated talent from fame. She made learning pure and fun again.

“So,” Momo began, “how do you feel about Kyou-chan?”

“... she seems capable.” He frowned pensively. “Why are you asking me this out of the blue?”

Momo dropped her highlighter and cradled her face with upturned brows. “I-I’m in love with her. I want to tell her…. B-but you know me. I overthink things.”

Oh.

Oh.

He appreciated Momo’s forthrightness, especially with something generally regarded as taboo such as homosexuality, but he couldn’t claim he saw it coming either.

“D-does it bother you that I like girls?” Momo asked. She almost sounded desperate, like he hadn’t come to the point where he could turn her away with ease.

“Of course not. I’m glad you found someone you like. But do you know if Jirou-san is gay?” he asked.

“She is. W-we got talking about it a couple of weeks ago. But like… just because you’re gay doesn’t mean you’re into every girl you see, you know. Wh-what if she’s not into me? What if I end up making the entire class feel awkward because our friendship ends on a bad note?”

“You’re kidding yourself,” he told Momo. “She was just laying in your lap. You’re a catch, and everyone knows it. If Jirou isn’t into you now, I doubt she’d be foolish enough to turn you away.”

Momo’s smiled was sweet enough it could melt glaciers. “You think so?”

He nodded earnestly.

“Todo-kun… could you come with me when I tell her then? Tomorrow morning before class? Just knowing you’ll be there will help me work up the nerve to tell Kyou-chan I’m in love with her.”

“If you’d like.”

“Todo-kun, thank you so much. I-I’ll whip up an outline when I get home and text it to you to review s-so I know I won’t come across as awkward or overzealous o-or something!”

He stuck a highlighter cap between his teeth and pulled. He was happy for his friend. Momo was talented enough to balance a love life and their busy schedule. As her friend, wasn’t he supposed to assist in her happiness?

It didn’t stop his chest from aching.

Eventually, they collected their things so they may leave. Momo hugged him like she hugged all her friends. “Thank you,” she whispered, “I appreciate what you do for me.”

His arms hesitantly wrapped around her waist, like sin. He liked her but Momo was gay. It felt a lot like goodbye. “Of course,” he croaked.

She slipped out of his arms, like sand, he watched her back disappear. He dragged his heavy feet to his mother’s hospital. That was his routine-- school, study (with Momo most recently), visit his mother, sleep. Wash, rinse, repeat. It was different that day though. He was accustomed to his father’s fists and even the hot water his mother poured on his face once upon a time. That was a hurt deeper than that, though. Rooted in his pleuris. Like abandonment.

He’d crawl into his mother’s lap like he did as a child, but she was hospitalized. Away from his father she was much better, but psychiatric wards were sterile environments. She was still very sensitive and sheltered from the outside world.

His mother smiled as he entered, leaving behind the starry-eyed folks beyond the metal door. It felt a lot like a prison in there, only with a softer bed and a tiny plant his mother tended to.

“Shouto-kun,” she cooed. “Look at you, you’re covered in snow. You must be freezing.”

“No. It’s been colder. It’s only my left side that really gets cold, anyways.” He shed his bag and speckled scarf onto the table. “How’re you feeling today, Mom?”

“Splendid. These bags are only from age, you know. It’s pretty out today. I like it when it snows.”

“I do too. I can’t stand summer,” he said.

“Neither can I! That ball of fire always pounding down from the sky, I almost say it’s pretentious,” she snort as she crossed her legs. “How’s school, darling?”

“Keeping my grades up. I’m still in the top five of my class.”

“Making friends?”

“Slowly.” It was easier tolerating people after Izuku’s reality check during the sports festival. “It’s fun watching them at least. Iida is still totally oblivious to Midoriya’s and Uraraka’s crushes on each other, but they’re oblivious to it too. Bakugou is still a pain in everyone’s ass. I’m not sure when anyone could find likable about him…. I’m functioning, though. He’s easy enough to avoid. Predictable.”

“And… and your father?”

He frowned. “... that’s the first time you’ve asked about Endeavor,” he said. “He harasses me at public gatherings, like the sports festival, but he hasn’t touched me in years. I’m fine, I swear.”

“That’s good….”

“Y-Yaoyorozu has found someone nice.” He knew where those conversations concerning his father led, he’d rather exchange more pleasant topics.

“Like a boyfriend?”

He wished.

Perhaps he shouldn’t have mentioned Momo. It made his chest hurt. “No, a girlfriend,” he replied. “Please… if you don’t like gays for whatever reason, don’t go off on a tirade. Yaoyorozu is my friend and I’d hate for things to be tense between us so early into our reunion.”

His mother smiled. “I don’t mind. Sweetheart, I glad you have friends. So long as she’s good to you I don’t mind.”

He returned her smile, though melancholic. “I-I’m supposed to be happy for but it… it hurts Mom. I wanted her to be mine.” He wiped his face. “I’m so selfish.”

His mother’s hand clasped his shoulder. “Shouto, maybe you two shouldn’t talk anymore. I can tell you care about her deeply, but when loving someone just hurts, it’s not worth it. I learned that with your father.”

Her tone juxtaposed against what he knew Momo to be, like his friend was anything comparable to his father, sounded like a load of bull. His hands balled on his knees. Momo was sweet. He couldn’t give up on her so easily, however much it hurt in the moment. Even if he couldn’t have her as a girlfriend, he couldn’t bear to be without her as a friend.

“R-right,” he said. Cue another change of topic. “A-anyways. Iida’s doing a lot good. He and his brother are coping with his brother’s paralysis. Midoriya and Uraraka are extraordinarily superb support pillars for him.”

“It’s good to know he’s doing well. It’s such a tragedy what happened to Ingenium. He was good, know you. A moral gentleman if ever met one. How’s your homework, darling?”

“I’m keeping on top of it.” Momo’s company made it easier to unwind. He hoped that was the case after that day, at least. “It’s still pretty basic stuff as of now. I know next semester will be more challenging, though. UA has a steep learning curve according to the senior students.”

“You’ll do just fine, Shouto-kun.”

He nodded. Of course. All thanks to Endeavor. Perhaps his intellectualism was his own, but his power? All thanks to his father. He was working on separating himself but it would take time. “I won’t disappoint you, Mom,” he said. “I have to go home though. It’s getting dark and I still have a lot to do. I’ll come by again tomorrow.”

“I love you.” His mother stood and collected him in a hug. He was taller than her by that point, his nose touched her hair.

“I love you too.” Even more than he loved Momo. His mother filled a hole in life, real family, despite the mistakes made. “Bye, Mom.”

Out the hospital’s front door, his phone buzzed in his pocket. A lengthy text from Momo, certainly her scripted confession to Kyouka. He wondered how Kyouka would react. Part of him hoped favorably to Momo, he couldn’t bear to see his friend heartbroken, but he also hoped Momo would change her mind. The dynamics in their class were already good. Why ruin what they had?

He wait until he got home to read Momo’s text. He locked himself in his room, his siblings cultivated without a sense of privacy apparently, and laid on his back in the dark. Momo’s script was beautiful. Not only could she create elaborate and beautiful objects, but also moving and poetic writing.

It hurt how much he envied Kyouka, like the piece shoved knives in his intercostals. He bled inside. No, he could feel each blade, driven deeper with each breath. They plugged the wounds and kept him from bleeding out. He lived his life as a punching bag but to be a pincushion was a different feeling entirely. One wrong move and those knives would slip out and he would surely gush until he was but a dry sack.

“Stupid,” he scolded himself. So stupid, so selfish, awfulawfulawful little boy! Who the hell did he fool that was enough for anyone, let alone sweet Momo? Only himself.

He complimented her nonetheless. He couldn’t ignore Momo. But he turned into his pillow, mouth agape in a soundless, agonized wail, and turned into his pillow so he may weep without his misery passing through the thin walls.

Vibration woke him. His phone buzzed madly on his sheets. As he sat up, he grimaced. Fuyumi would scold him for falling asleep in his clothes and his crusty pillowcase. But Momo was begging him to hurry to school. He replied he would be there soon. It didn’t hurt like last night-- the ceaseless throb. He was just numb that morning. It was a blur dressing and brushing his teeth and combing his hair.

But he ran that morning. He supposed Momo didn’t care if his stupid hair was smooth or not when Kyouka’s was always immaculate.

Momo was out front. She rubbed her gloved hands together with her eyebrows knit worriedly. She practically tackled him as he approached. By that time, it was like reflex to wrap himself around her.

“Thank you so much for coming, Todoroki-kun. I-I know it’s weird but just having you here helps. Can you just… w-wait behind the gate? Please?”

“Of course. I’ll be rooting you on.” And simultaneously dying inside.

Momo squeezed him. “Thank you again, Todoroki-kun.” He hummed as she slid out of his arms. “Okay, now hide! Kyou-chan will be here soon!” Momo pushed him behind the gate and he obediently let her, like a dog told to heel. And loyally he wait, leaned against the cement walls of the entrance.

“Yaomomo!” Kyouka exclaimed, followed by the weird smell of tobacco. “What the hell are you doing out here? Aren’t you freezing your fuckin’ ass off?”

“Oh my god, put that away before someone sees!” Momo hissed, followed by the sound of crunching ice as she stamped out Kyouka’s cigarette. “B-but I am cold, so I’d like to make this quick if we can.”

“Oh… kay,” Kyouka said hesitantly. “What’s on your mind?”

“I’m in love with you.”

What ever happened to Momo’s script?

“Oh.” Kyouka shuffled. “Well, this is embarrassing. I was kinda hoping I’d get the balls to tell you that I liked you, but this works.” Kyouka laughed abashedly. “Does… this make us an item then?”

“Yes!” Momo squealed. “Yes it does! Yesyesyes!” The pair laughed, Momo’s bubbling like a rolling boil.

He was crouched, staring at the slush and swollen salt scattered in the courtyard, his hands clasped over his mouth. Was he supposed to ache as he did? Like the knives slid out from between his ribs and blood gushed down his front? Ethically, no. Momo was his friend. His friend had a girlfriend, and he could only hurt.

He was such a selfish little boy.

Kyouka and Momo passed him hand-in-hand. Momo couldn’t see his watery eyes as she craned her head to wave at him and wave him over to them. It hurt, but he stood like she summoned, wiped his eyes, and jogged to flank the happy couple.

They still held hands when they entered the classroom. Eijirou and Denki were first to congratulate them, and Fumikage slapped Mineru to the ground before he made any particularly vulgar statement. It was almost like a celebration, seeing all of Momo and Kyouka’s friends surround them with big grins. It was like fingers gouged his open wounds.

Izuku nudged him. “H-hey, Todoroki, are you okay?” He and Ochaco loomed over him like a pair of mother hens. “You’re looking a little sick.”

“I was up late studying.” It was only half a lie. He cried for something like three hours before he managed to fall asleep. Emotionally, he was drained and marveled he had anymore to still drain out of him.

Ochaco pouted at him. “You need to sleep, Todo-kun! You won’t keep your title if you’re sleep deprived, you know! Do you need me to tuck you in?”

“Gee, thanks Mom.”

“Heya,” Kyouka waved as she and Momo approached his desk.

“Good morning, Todoroki-kun.” He wished Momo would just call him Shouto. “I-I wanted to thank you for your support. You’re basically the reason we’re together now….”

“Whoa, wait, Todoroki played matchmaker!?” Denki shrieked.

He watched in horror as his classmates devolved into renewed hysteria as if encouraging his friend to pursue her happiness was bizarre. Perhaps if they knew it was at the cost of his own chance to be with Momo, but otherwise, he was sure it was the normal thing to do.

Shouta Aizawa entered their classroom and within the blink of an eye, his classmates were in their seats and perfectly silent.

It was all a blur. His notes were messier, he could barely process a word of their lecture, his English was jumbled. Momo glanced back, brow furrowed and her thin lips dipped in a frown. He sat, hot with same, until training rolled around.

They were before the urban training ground, All Might glorious as always with his broad smile and silver-screen costume.

“Today we will be conducting another capture mission!” He presented the striped lottery boxes. “You will be sorted into teams of two and be assigned as heroes or villains. Heroes, you will be capturing a biological agent from the villains. Your goal is to both escape the compound with the agent and have apprehended both villains before your fifteen minute time limit expires. Villains, you just have to apprehend both heroes or keep them from obtaining the biological agent for fifteen minutes. Heroes, if the agent is broken, you lose. Heroes and villains will be penalized for acting on their own or causing property damage. Good luck, kids! Let’s get started!”

He and Tsuyu were the first hero team, pitted against none other than Kyouka Jirou and Eijirou.

It made him itch. It made him taste copper, like anger.

“Todoroki-san,” Tsuyu began, “we should take this time to plan our attack, kero.”

He turned from the floor plan and nodded. “Do you have anything in mind?” He made sure to ask that before he went off on his own since the practical exams. Two brains were better than one after all. It wasn’t like UA was comprised of imbeciles after all. Tsuyu was even among the exceptionally talented.

“I do, kero. This place is riddled with windows. I doubt they’ll have an agent in a room by one especially since I can climb up walls, but once we secure the agent I can just crawl out a window.”

“I can occupy and apprehend Jirou and Kirishima while you make your getaway.”

“Maybe you can secure Kirishima, but Jirou’s soundwaves can break your ice easily given the time. There’s a security system I’m sure they’re watching too. You’ll have to rush them.”

“I should apprehend Jirou first since her soundwaves will prove the greatest threat. Kirishima will be hard to get close to if I’m not careful, but I think after Jirou can’t use her soundwaves to shatter my ice, I’ll be able to apprehend him most easily.”

Tsuyu nodded. “I’ll be following behind you. Try not to freeze the walls or the ceiling so I have something to climb on without having to worry about freezing off my skin.”

He nodded, they clapped on it, and he tucked his map in his pocket.

He rushed inside, skating over the icy floor. The villain team was smartly located in one of the rooms in the center of the building, away from any windows. Eijirou rushed him. It was a brilliant strategy for Kyouka to sit back. Eijirou’s metamorphic Quirk better suited him for combat, and in case he just froze over Eijirou, Kyouka was still free to destroy his ice and put Eijirou back in the game.

He ducked under Eijirou’s elbow and skid across his ice towards Kyouka.

The plan was to apprehend her, but it hit him like a freight train. Jealousy, like copper on his tongue.

Kyouka swung at him with her sword he caught it in his frozen palm. She swore as he swiped her feet out from under her. His fiery hand caught her jacket. Kyouka cursed again and ripped off her jacket. With a stomp, he froze her, flipped over Eijirou’s charge, and landing with his left, the cool room erupted in steam with the burst of heat.

Tsuyu’s tongue rocketed from the hallway and fished the three of them out in one go, Kirishima unconscious and himself squashed face-to-face with Kyouka.

They landed on solid ground and Kyouka swung at him with a punch. “You jackass, you coulda fuckin’ killed us!” she howled. “You realize you coulda toned that the fuck down right!?”

He hopped over Kyouka’s kick and wrapped his legs around her shoulders. He fell onto his arms and threw her in the building side. Tsuyu’s tongue caught Kyouka before she collided with the brick, and suddenly he was plucked off his feet by All Might.

“Todoroki-kun,” All Might’s grave tone somehow made his smile more fearsome. “Visit me in my office after class. We have much to review!”

He grimaced. Nonetheless, he obeyed. He passed Momo on his walk back to campus, with the same worried look she had during their English class. He was in for more than just an earful from All Might. Momo wouldn’t let him get away with being an asshole to her girlfriend.

The wall clock in All Might’s office ticked away. The queasy ball in his gut churned like curdling milk as it ticked away. That was the first time he was in trouble beyond a warning.

All Might finally entered, clad in his striped suit. They sat across from each other and he feared All Might could see him sweat bullets.

“Todoroki-kun, you and I both know you are an exceptional young man and hero in the making. However, you realize people could have died,” All Might said. “We are heroes. We apprehend, we turn villains in to the authorities. We do not murder people however heinous they may be. Now, I am gladdened that you are beginning to embrace the other half of your powers. But you cannot continue to conduct yourself in such a reckless fashion in or out of the classroom.

“I-I understand,” he said.

“Do you? Kirishima-kun is with recovery girl for the burns he received. Tsu-chan and Jirou-chan are receiving care for first and second degree burns. You realize you can’t do something like that in anything less than extringent, life-threatening circumstances, correct?”

He nodded. It felt a lot like his father’s criticism. However kind All Might may be, he always took scoldings personally. He wondered when he could take them as a gesture of love like his rational side understood All Might.

“Good.” All Might moved into the seat beside his and rest an enormous arm over the back. “Will you tell me what’s on your mind now? You’re so level-headed. I know when you lash out.”

He paused, recalling his mother’s advice the day before. He ached to see Momo with anyone but him, but he would be left hollow without her. He couldn’t hear how happy he would be without Momo again.

“I just got ahead of myself,” he answered, his fists balled on his knees.

“And why is that, Todoroki-kun?”

His eyes watered and he knew the gig was up. It just hurt so badly, it was so hard to hide. “I-I got jealous,” he said. “Jirou a-and Yaoyorozu are girlfriends a-as of today but… but I like Yaoyorozu too. I promise I-I’m trying to be happy for Yaoyorozu since she’s my friend b-but it’s so hard when it feels like I’m being stabbed again and again. It’s fucking unfair, and I’m so stupid and I’m a terrible friend to them.” He dug his palms in his eyes. “It sucks so much.”

“Oh, son,” All Might collected him in a hug, and he felt foolish how congested and tearful he was, like a child curled in his mother’s lap again. “Heartbreak is part of growing up, Todoroki-kun. I can’t tell you otherwise, and I can’t tell you that Yaoyorozu-chan will change her mind. But you won’t hurt like this forever. You’ll go back to feeling okay, and you’ll go back to being their good friend. Give yourself time to heal.”

He wiped his face on his sleeve. It didn’t feel like he’d ever recover, but All Might hadn’t lied to him yet.

“Alright, kiddo, go apologize now! You’ll feel a lot better once you get that off your chest.”

He would, of course, if nothing more than to preserve his friendship with Momo.

It was lunch hour by that time. Outside of All Might’s office, he sent Momo a text to meet him in their classroom so he could apologize.

Kyouka and Momo were in their classroom as he requested, sat side-by-side on one of the desks. He approached them and bowed before they could utter a word.

“I-I would like to apologize for my conduct earlier, Jirou-san,” he said. “I was jealous of you and Yaoyorozu’s relationship a-and I let it get to me. I am happy for you two and I promise to behave myself as your friend in the future.”

There were seconds of silence between them, his heart rose and rose into his throat. Momo finally wrapped her fingers around his chin and lifted his face. Her dark eyes were soft and again, finally, she was smiling. It eased his nausea.

“I want to apologize too, Todo-- Shouto-kun. I haven’t been completely forward with you. I-I’m in love with you like I’m in love with Kyouka. But I wasn’t sure how you’d respond to my relationship to Kyouka. Favorably enough if you’ve come to apologize.” She collected him in a hug. His heart pound with life anew, her heart and his both thundering. “If you’re okay with it… I want to be with you and Kyouka.”

It took him three, long seconds to put together what Momo meant, as if too good to be true. “Yes,” he said, breathless.

Momo’s fingers slipped through his hair and she pulled him down for a kiss. There were no fireworks, nothing of the sort. But he melt in Momo’s arms. He was complete, searing with glee.

They fell away, smiling like a couple of bashful fools, and Kyouka jostled him. “Asshole,” she griped with that cheeky grin of her’s.

“Yeah,” he muttered. “Sorry. Let’s get something to eat.”

“Ooh, I’m coming! Momo’s lap is the softest seat, you know.”

He and Momo stuttered bashfully. Nonetheless, her hands caught his and Kyouka’s like nets, calloused and strong, and they walked three-wide like a bunch of assholes, catching stares from returning students and instructors alike. Nonetheless, he was happy.

“B-both of them!?”

“Pick your jaw up off the floor, Iida,” he scolded Tenya. Izuku laughed nervously as they sat.

“W-we’re just surprised. It’s not exactly everyday people come out as gay o-or multiam---”

“Polyamorous,” Momo corrected Izuku, “it’s called polyamory. But I’m bisexual and polyamorous, and that’s a fact that won’t be changing in the near future.”

“I’m surprised no one noticed,” Ochaco chimed in. “Yaomomo gets this gooey look with people she’s got a crush on. It’s not hard to catch on to.”

He, Izuku, and Tenya clammed up. That was true, he thought, looking back to Kyouka and Momo’s interactions. How could he not have noticed Momo looked at him the same way? What kind of idiot was he?

“I think it’s a dude thing. I mean, he got jealous! They’re fuckin’ ignorant.” Kyouka sighed. “I need a cigarette….”

Momo combed her fingers through his hair and pressed a kiss to his temple. His face would hurt that night with all the smiling he did.

That was fine by him. Hero life was pretty good.

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #shouto todoroki #momo yaoyorozu #kyouka jirou #todomomojirou

[plusorminuscongress]

New story in Politics from Time: Pete Buttigieg Releases His Plan For Securing Long-Term Care

For Democratic presidential candidate and South Bend, Ind. Mayor Pete Buttigieg, the issue of long-term care is personal.

When his father was dying last January, he and his mother grappled with the possibility of having to arrange long-term care for him. Because Medicare does not cover most long-term care costs, a social worker told Buttigieg’s mom that her best option might be to spend down her savings: if she got poor enough she’d qualify for Medicaid.

“While I heard about these kinds of stories in the past, I understood in a different way” after that experience, Buttigieg told TIME in a phone interview on Sunday.

On Monday, Buttigieg released a set of policy proposals designed to prevent other Americans from facing the same dilemma that his mother had. His plan is aimed at ensuring that older Americans have access to affordable long-term care and can maintain their economic independence after retirement.

The plan, entitled “Dignity and Security in Retirement,” calls for a new national long-term care benefit program, while strengthening the long-term care insurance market. It preserves private insurance coverage, which is similar to his proposed health care program, called Medicare for All Who Want It.

The signature idea in Buttigieg’s plan is a benefit program, dubbed Long-Term Care America, which would give eligible seniors $90 per day that they could put toward care costs such as hiring a home health aide or paying for a nursing home. This would be open to people 65 or older who need help with two or more daily activities of living, according to the plan.

Buttigieg’s plan also focuses on boosting the number of direct care workers, supporting unpaid family caregivers, promoting access to care in homes and communities, and extending Social Security. His plan would raise the minimum wage to $15 an hour—something he and other candidates have proposed in the past—and establish a National Direct Care Workforce Standards Board to help regulate the industry and set policies for issues such as compensation, training and recruitment.

“It’s so important that we support caregiving as a profession,” Buttigieg told TIME. “First and foremost, we are going to need more people in the field. Secondly it’s just morally unacceptable that so many people in such an important field are earning poverty wages. Third, there’s a big equity concern because so many caregivers are disproportionately likely to be women and to be workers of color.”

As the youngest candidate in the race, 37-year-old Buttigieg told TIME he feels a special responsibility to set up a system that will help people aging now and those who will be aging in the future. “So much of my campaign is about ensuring that we are strong for the long term of the country,” Buttigieg said. Creating workable safety nets for older Americans also helps people in Buttigieg’s age group now, who are often called upon to care for their parents after retirement.

Buttigieg is releasing his long-term care plan just as he is rocketing to the top of polls in Iowa and New Hampshire. His support is particularly strong among older voters. (He does not poll as well among younger voters as his rivals Senators Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren do.)

As the U.S. population has aged in recent years, researchers have raised the alarm that the country is not prepared to provide the amount of care Baby Boomers will need. At least half of adults turning 65 today will need long-term care, and by 2026 the country will need 7.8 million new direct care workers.

The average cost of hiring a home health aide is more than $50,000 a year, according to the AARP, and nursing home care costs $100,000. Buttigieg’s says his benefit program would first cover catastrophic costs, allowing long-term care insurance to cover people who need less care. He also says he would broadly strengthen the private market.

“This will include simplifying long-term care insurance to promote effective consumer choice by standardizing it, creating a marketplace for private long-term care insurance, encouraging employers to support the distribution of long-term care insurance to employees, and incentivizing employers to offer long-term care coverage on an opt-out basis,” the plan says.

Buttigieg’s plan reflects a different strategy than both Sanders and Warren, both of whom have proposed that long-term care would be covered under Medicare for All. When Warren introduced her transition plan for how she’d get to Medicare for All earlier this month, she also said she would include long-term care in the expanded benefits of her “Medicare for All Option.”

The plan includes a number of provisions aimed at helping unpaid caregivers, who can experience significant economic, health and emotional consequences as they juggle caregiving with their own jobs and responsibilities. Buttigieg says he will pass an enhanced version of the FAMILY Act to give people 12 weeks of paid family and medical leave that they could use to care for a wide variety of relatives and chosen family members.

Buttigieg would create a Social Security credit for caregivers so they can earn credit as if they were making the average earnings of a full-time person working outside the home. Warren and Sanders have also proposed similar credits.

The ways in which Americans currently pay for long-term care often incentivize moving into nursing homes or other institutions, even though many older people and those with disabilities prefer to get care at home. Buttigieg would eliminate Medicaid’s institutional bias, mandate coverage for home and community-based care and raise asset and income limits for long-term services and supports through Medicaid so that more people can qualify for Medicaid to help with their care. The plan offers several proposals that aim to help non-elderly people with disabilities improve coverage for their long-term care.

When it comes to retirement security, Buttigieg says he would strengthen Social Security by subjecting individual income above $250,000 to additional Social Security taxes and by working with Congress to automatically adjust high earners’ Social Security taxes to help keep the program going. The proposal also includes a new minimum benefit of 125% of the federal poverty line for anyone who worked at least 30 years.

Based on Buttigieg’s proposals, the chief economist at Moody’s Analytics found that the Social Security system would be extended from 2035 until 2051, according to a letter provided by the campaign.

The plan would also create a public option 401(k) that workers could use to supplement their Social Security benefits. Workers could choose to contribute 1.5% of their pay, and employers would contribute 3%. This would also have a “Rainy Day Account” that participants could use before they retire with no penalty.

“I am determined to usher in a new era for older Americans, one that empowers them to age and retire with dignity,” Buttigieg wrote in the plan. “One that equips them and their families with a sense of security over their futures, allowing them to see it as a time filled with possibility.”

By Abigail Abrams on November 25, 2019 at 06:00AM

#Time #politics #PlusOrMinusCongress #±Congress #Indega± #IndegaPlusOrMinus #TimeMag #TimeMagazine

[taenys]

♢ shinee world v in la ♢

alright so I’ve finally gotten home and have been able to write a detailed fan account of the whole thing which includes their airport arrival!!! the whole thing ended up being over 2.5k :’))) unsurprising considering who I am (resident essay writer of the internet) but i did try to keep it as short and to the point as possible. 

anyways if any of y’all are interested in reading a really emo and sappy essay about shinee and what was undeniably the best day of my life from my seat in the pit, read on!

Airport arrival: I saw Jonghyun’s face so clearly. Key went by me in a flash clinging to him, so I got a clear profile shot. Taemin’s face was covered but his beautiful eyes were visible and I got a very clear look at him. Minho as well, although he was wearing sunglasses, he was tall and brooding. Onew passed before I could see him. Taemin looked at me wide-eyed, inquisitively. I was in front of their van on the sidewalk making hearts at them while they got in and got ready to enter traffic to leave and Minho and Taemin got a clear frontal view of me doing so and both of them smiled, but Taemin’s eyes were on me for quite a while. Once they started to drive away, I waved frantically at them and Minho waved back at all of us. 

Jonghyun’s face caught me off guard. I was in a stunned silence when I saw him, his poreless, airbrushed, perfectly chiseled angelic beautiful unreal face. The entire time I said nothing. No words came out of my mouth, no screams. I was silent. In complete and utter AWE. I’ve never experienced that before meeting an idol. At SNSD’s fanmeet, I screamed (to the dismay of Jessica lol). At every concert I’ve screamed as is customary lol. When I saw f(x) at the airport I called out their names. At EXO’s fanmeet I screamed to get Kris’ attention. But seeing SHINee, right in front of me, their beautiful faces materialized, and even more breathtaking than I could possibly comprehend, the 5 boys I have adored so completely for 7+ years, who’s music has been a constant soundtrack playing on repeat every day of my life…I couldn’t formulate words or sounds to express all those emotions. There were none that could do them justice. The love I felt was so fucking overwhelming, as soon as their van started to drive away and Minho’s waving ceased I broke. I cracked. The suffocating sense of adoration and joy at seeing them, seeing my boys, my loves, and my reasons for existence, I fucking SOBBED. Not small tears but full on snot inducing yelps. I literally choked on my emotions. I had to run back into the airport to my mom to hide these tears from everyone else because they were just so ridiculous lol. Everyone else was all giddy and going over their fancams and screaming with each other. I just cried and cried. I could not believe it. I couldn’t process the whole experience. I love them so much, I can’t even begin to tell you guys just how much. I realized it at that airport when I saw them. It was such a different experience than all my other crazy kpop idol meeting experiences. 

Also, just as a note, the whole thing about them being mobbed was greatly exaggerated. It only looked that way on camera because we had all unfortunately formed our organized lines in front of the doors, but they ended up coming down an escalator so we all had to run over and form NEW lines from the escalator to the door and so it looks like we all tried to swarm them. They all tend to walk really fast so we didn’t even have the opportunity to form new lines since by the time we got to them, they were already nearing the exit so at that point we all just tried to see them and welcome them as best we could. There were only like 1-2 fans who were being disrespectful and obnoxious, but trust me when I say most of us were filming and following from a safe enough distance or at least trying to.

The concert: As soon as I found my seat, which was in row D in the pit aka the 4th row from the stage, my heart stopped. I was so close. SO FUCKING CLOSE to the stage SHINee would be on. And I was right in the center too, I’d have a clear center super close view of them, and the realization of that was utterly staggering. The energy around me was filled with excitement and glee, but I was in my own little bubble of heart quenching awe and disbelief. I could see my mom and my sister in the row behind me and I gave my mom the “Can you believe this is happening” look and she smiled and nodded. She and Ruby (sis) were experiencing their own waves of excitement but I wasn’t with them to share in it. I was alone where I sat but that was what ended up happening during the ticket buying bonanza. I was able to score 1 pit ticket, and we all agreed it would be mine since I was the “main” fan in our little trio. SHINee was ours, but first and foremost they were mine. But luckily my mom and sister got seats together and only a row behind me, so they were just as close as I was to the stage. While we waited for the show to start the venue played their music and the crowd chanted along to most of them. I sang too with my eyes closed, ready for the inevitable. I had to told myself in the weeks approaching the date that I would do my best to study and analyze every member’s face and mannerisms as best I could. Since I knew they’d move around and switch sides a lot, I knew I’d have an opportunity to see every member at some point.  When the venue got dark and the light blared and the first VCR started my heart was racing a million miles an hour. My mind was repeating “this is real, this is happening, they’re going to come out and you’re going to see them, you’re going to actually fucking SEE them. The boys who’ve made your entire life worth living for the past almost 8 years are going to be right in front of you, singing all your favorite songs (because all their songs are my favorites, LITERALLY), and you’re close enough that they’re going to see YOU too,” that last thought being the MOST mind blowing of them all. The people sitting directly in front of me were luckily not taller than me, so my head was higher than theirs when we stood which meant SHINee would get a clear shot at my face when they looked in this direction. I opted to wear these cute aqua cat ears with flowers on them in my hair to hopefully draw their eye. 

Finally the VCR ended and we all stood up and we knew it was time. We screamed. I screamed “I’m not emotionally ready oh my god” to the girl sitting next to me (lol). I wasn’t ready and I don’t think I ever WOULD be ready. How do you prepare to see your favorite humans of all time? They opened with Hitchhiking and I was screaming the lyrics along with them, and oh my god they were so close to the edge of the stage, closer to me than I even imagined, I could see every detail of their faces and it was breathtaking. At one point Jonghyun looked directly into my eyes and held my gaze for a few seconds and smirked. What I noticed first was, they’re all so much more beautiful in real life than is even humanly possible, and secondly they were all dancing SO HARD and with SO MUCH INTENSITY it was stunning. They were dripping in sweat after the first 3 songs but MAN did they dance with every ounce of strength they had. Their passion and drive was just astonishing and inspiring to witness. Onew’s dancing was especially impressive. Taemin’s dancing is so fluid and poetic and I can’t believe I got to witness his shirtless godlike body in person so close WOW. Minho is so much more godly than you can imagine. Jonghyun is small (smol) and darling with those sharp cheekbones and puppy eyes. Key is so intense and cat-like in his features which are more defined in real life. Onew is pure gorgeousness, his smile is the most beautiful thing that exists and will ever exist. It’s hard to believe any of them could be so beautiful. I won’t go song by song describing how they looked and how they felt because I’d have to write over 10 pages and who has time to read all of that lmao I’ll just point out the “highlights.” Key’s English. I know we all know it’s great but hearing it in real life was an experience. He sounds so confident and cool, I adore it with my life. When he told us that this was real and we weren’t seeing them through youtube I fucking BALLED. Because that’s exactly what was so shocking and emotional for me, that I was actually seeing them. And they were fucking seeing me too. Minho and Key being playful and silly speaking English added 10 years to my life. Honestly, Minkey are so important. Their banter is the best thing. I couldn’t believe I was experiencing my otps in real life too LMAO. They were all exactly how I knew they’d be. Taemin would be shy and smiley, like the baby he is, Onew would be aloof and dorky and too precious for words, Jonghyun would be flirty and silly and not try out any English lol, Minho would be so cool and sexy during performances but turn into a sweet cinnamon roll during talks, and Key would be the leader, confident and charismatic and intense. They were all so perfect. Jongtae hugging, Taemin speaking English, it was all too cute to witness. 

Minho spent a lot of time on my side so I got the most fanservice from him. It was unfuckingbelievable. He is an actual god among mortals I’m telling you. His endlessly long legs and slim abdomen, and that tiny gorgeous face with those huge expressive frog eyes and round lips, his entire existence is bliss. He looked at me and smiled a TON because I was making hearts. Taemin was in front of me at one point too, with nothing obstructing his view of my face since the people in front were small and he looked at me and smiled that babyish smiley of his that I live for. Key looked at me and raised an eyebrow curiously at one point as well. Onew got wide-eyed and excited when he saw me and a few others make the “MVP” with our hands during his line in replay. I can’t express enough just how fucking gorgeous and perfect their faces are. I can picture them all so fucking clearly in my mind, it gives me heart palpitations. Even my mom said afterwards at the hotel that there’s no way they’re real. Speaking of my mom, Taemin is the actual love of her life, so when he did his solo stage of Goodbye she snuck up to the front row just to watch him lol. Also during Savior, Minho came right over to their side and I looked behind me to see if my mom and sister would get any fanserivce since he had a clear view of them in the aisle seat they had, and sure enough I saw my mom smiling the biggest I’ve ever seen from her, and waving at him and he looked at her and smiled and waved back. When the fans around saw that interaction between them, they all started waving too, wanting to get a hello from him as well and so he obliged and started waving around the entire section. But the waving was started by my mom and she won’t let anyone forget it lol. “Remember when Minho waved at you and smiled” has been a constant phrase we’ve been saying at random intervals through the day. 

This day meant just as much to her as it did to me. Just seeing them perform was indescribable though. I’ve loved their music and choreo for so long, and witnessing it was a whole different experience. I saw them at SMTOWN, sure, but that was only for a few songs and I was a lot farther from the stage. And even when I think back to that concert, where I saw SNSD and EXO and f(x) and so many other performers, SHINee’s has ALWAYS stood out to me as the most memorable and emotional. SHINee has always been my number one.  Seeing them for nearly 3 hours, I sang so loud and so hard (I kept my screaming to a minimum and focused on singing and doing fanchants so they’d see that we love their music here and despite the language barrier, we know their lyrics and hopefully they’d come back again someday soon). I lost my voice by the end and ended up with a sore throat and a fever the next day, but it was well worth it. I also couldn’t walk for the rest of the week lmao It was like I’d run a marathon after living a sedentary life for years and not doing any kind of training beforehand. My legs did not survive. And neither did my heart. I couldn’t listen to or watch anything SHINee related this whole week honestly. Even seeing pictures and fancams of the event (speaking of which, my sister got a fucking glorious fancam of Onew) hurt my heart and so I avoided everything like the plague. It ended too quickly. The whole experience ruined me though. I crave them so much more now. I want to save up to go to Korea to see them since I know they probably won’t do another US tour. I am going to live out the rest of my life just following their careers and loving them unconditionally as I do now, maybe even more so if that’s even possible. If I had the means and the money I’d probably drop everything and become a fansite owner who travels everywhere and sees them and even befriends them. 

Their music represents so much for me. It represents the bond I have with my mother most especially. Experiencing all of this with her made it so much more emotional. We’ve bonded over SHINee since the beginning. As soon as I discovered them nearly 8 years ago, I showed them to mom. She was the first person I showed a kpop video too and of course it was SHINee We watched Hello Baby and their other shows together, and she learned about them with me and grew to love them as much as I have. Her and I listened to their music more than anything and their songs, their passion, their existence gave her and I a sense of happiness and motivation in a difficult time in our lives. We all just…clung to SHINee’s music. Their music is just so fucking GOOD. She has her own copies of all their Korean albums in her car and they’re the only thing she listens to. It was my dream, my ultimate dream to go to a SHINee concert with her. I wanted her to see them. I saw them before at SMTOWN in 2012 and it was MAGICAL. My mom didn’t get to attend because we couldn’t afford another ticket but she was in the parking lot waiting to pick us up and decided to get off and wait inside to try and hear some of the concert and she says she heard Sherlock and saw glimpses of SHINee performing through the curtains in the venue and she cried. She cried because she was so happy that my sister and I were there seeing them, and she sang along to the song and felt like she was a part of that experience with us. And now she got to see them with us, and us with her, and it was pure and utter magic. 

Anyways, SHINee is my entire life and I will never be over this experience. But man oh man, loving them this much has only made the whole “post-concert depression” about a million times more painful and unbearable than anything I’ve ever experienced. Something that can only be cured by seeing them again. I NEED to see them again.

#personal #fanaccount #shinee #best day of my life is honestly an understatement #the fucking post concert feels are too intense tho #i love shinee 2 much

[itsfinancethings]

For Democratic presidential candidate and South Bend, Ind. Mayor Pete Buttigieg, the issue of long-term care is personal.

When his father was dying last January, he and his mother grappled with the possibility of having to arrange long-term care for him. Because Medicare does not cover most long-term care costs, a social worker told Buttigieg’s mom that her best option might be to spend down her savings: if she got poor enough she’d qualify for Medicaid.

“While I heard about these kinds of stories in the past, I understood in a different way” after that experience, Buttigieg told TIME in a phone interview on Sunday.

On Monday, Buttigieg released a set of policy proposals designed to prevent other Americans from facing the same dilemma that his mother had. His plan is aimed at ensuring that older Americans have access to affordable long-term care and can maintain their economic independence after retirement.

The plan, entitled “Dignity and Security in Retirement,” calls for a new national long-term care benefit program, while strengthening the long-term care insurance market. It preserves private insurance coverage, which is similar to his proposed health care program, called Medicare for All Who Want It.

The signature idea in Buttigieg’s plan is a benefit program, dubbed Long-Term Care America, which would give eligible seniors $90 per day that they could put toward care costs such as hiring a home health aide or paying for a nursing home. This would be open to people 65 or older who need help with two or more daily activities of living, according to the plan.

Buttigieg’s plan also focuses on boosting the number of direct care workers, supporting unpaid family caregivers, promoting access to care in homes and communities, and extending Social Security. His plan would raise the minimum wage to $15 an hour—something he and other candidates have proposed in the past—and establish a National Direct Care Workforce Standards Board to help regulate the industry and set policies for issues such as compensation, training and recruitment.

“It’s so important that we support caregiving as a profession,” Buttigieg told TIME. “First and foremost, we are going to need more people in the field. Secondly it’s just morally unacceptable that so many people in such an important field are earning poverty wages. Third, there’s a big equity concern because so many caregivers are disproportionately likely to be women and to be workers of color.”

As the youngest candidate in the race, 37-year-old Buttigieg told TIME he feels a special responsibility to set up a system that will help people aging now and those who will be aging in the future. “So much of my campaign is about ensuring that we are strong for the long term of the country,” Buttigieg said. Creating workable safety nets for older Americans also helps people in Buttigieg’s age group now, who are often called upon to care for their parents after retirement.

Buttigieg is releasing his long-term care plan just as he is rocketing to the top of polls in Iowa and New Hampshire. His support is particularly strong among older voters. (He does not poll as well among younger voters as his rivals Senators Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren do.)

As the U.S. population has aged in recent years, researchers have raised the alarm that the country is not prepared to provide the amount of care Baby Boomers will need. At least half of adults turning 65 today will need long-term care, and by 2026 the country will need 7.8 million new direct care workers.

The average cost of hiring a home health aide is more than $50,000 a year, according to the AARP, and nursing home care costs $100,000. Buttigieg’s says his benefit program would first cover catastrophic costs, allowing long-term care insurance to cover people who need less care. He also says he would broadly strengthen the private market.

“This will include simplifying long-term care insurance to promote effective consumer choice by standardizing it, creating a marketplace for private long-term care insurance, encouraging employers to support the distribution of long-term care insurance to employees, and incentivizing employers to offer long-term care coverage on an opt-out basis,” the plan says.

Buttigieg’s plan reflects a different strategy than both Sanders and Warren, both of whom have proposed that long-term care would be covered under Medicare for All. When Warren introduced her transition plan for how she’d get to Medicare for All earlier this month, she also said she would include long-term care in the expanded benefits of her “Medicare for All Option.”

The plan includes a number of provisions aimed at helping unpaid caregivers, who can experience significant economic, health and emotional consequences as they juggle caregiving with their own jobs and responsibilities. Buttigieg says he will pass an enhanced version of the FAMILY Act to give people 12 weeks of paid family and medical leave that they could use to care for a wide variety of relatives and chosen family members.

Buttigieg would create a Social Security credit for caregivers so they can earn credit as if they were making the average earnings of a full-time person working outside the home. Warren and Sanders have also proposed similar credits.

The ways in which Americans currently pay for long-term care often incentivize moving into nursing homes or other institutions, even though many older people and those with disabilities prefer to get care at home. Buttigieg would eliminate Medicaid’s institutional bias, mandate coverage for home and community-based care and raise asset and income limits for long-term services and supports through Medicaid so that more people can qualify for Medicaid to help with their care. The plan offers several proposals that aim to help non-elderly people with disabilities improve coverage for their long-term care.

When it comes to retirement security, Buttigieg says he would strengthen Social Security by subjecting individual income above $250,000 to additional Social Security taxes and by working with Congress to automatically adjust high earners’ Social Security taxes to help keep the program going. The proposal also includes a new minimum benefit of 125% of the federal poverty line for anyone who worked at least 30 years.

Based on Buttigieg’s proposals, the chief economist at Moody’s Analytics found that the Social Security system would be extended from 2035 until 2051, according to a letter provided by the campaign.

The plan would also create a public option 401(k) that workers could use to supplement their Social Security benefits. Workers could choose to contribute 1.5% of their pay, and employers would contribute 3%. This would also have a “Rainy Day Account” that participants could use before they retire with no penalty.

“I am determined to usher in a new era for older Americans, one that empowers them to age and retire with dignity,” Buttigieg wrote in the plan. “One that equips them and their families with a sense of security over their futures, allowing them to see it as a time filled with possibility.”

#IFTTT #Blogger

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