Chapter 33: Wedding
The day of the wedding was a blur for Grace. She had dutifully arrived by 7 a.m. to help Alice start coordinating the set up of the clearing just off of their house. Bella was to get there no later than 10 to start getting ready. Grace was in sweats and a cropped sweatshirt with her hair pulled up in a messy bun as she artfully wove fresh flowers together.
“Emmett! Come on, I said finish clearing the boulders not smash them to pieces and scattering broken rock across the dance floor.” Grace clucked making her way over.
“I’m trying to see if I can hit it just right so that it crumbles into a likeness of their faces! Like when you see the virgin Mary in toast,” Emmett said to Grace’s confusion.
“Well you’re about to be put on duck duty if you don’t knock it off and clean this up!” Grace scolded. Jasper was hovering around a nearby pond eyeing the swimming ducks with a pained look on his face. Whenever a duck got too close, he’d move ever so slightly and they’d bounce away from him squawking.
“I’m not dealing with ducks,” Emmett said under his breath. Grace turned to go back inside looking for more ribbon as a bustle of energy moved in and around the house. Alice had tasked each member of her family with some important task.
Grace went upstairs and into Alice’s studio as she pricked at the flowers and gave out a shriek when she looked up to find Edward there stock still and staring at Bella’s wedding dress.
“Jesus Edward!” Grace said placing a hand over her chest and taking a minute to recover. He looked over at her slightly amused and a little embarrassed before Grace continued, “What are you doing in here, isn’t that bad luck?” she pointed toward Bella’s dress.
“Only if she’s in it, I think,” He said quietly. His eyes returned the dress and Grace moved past him to open the craft drawers spilling over with ribbons. Once she found one she liked, she moved to sit at the makeup station Alice had set up for Bella to get ready at and set to work on the flowers.
“What are you making?” he asked after a second.
“Boutaneers,” Grace said with a needle in between her teeth still. “You gonna tell me why you’re really in here?”
Edward gave a knowing smirk, “So perceptive,” he said looking back to the dress before he spoke. “She’s going to want me to turn her after we get back from the honeymoon.” He heard Grace hold her breath, her fingers stalling over the flowers momentarily. “I don’t know how I’m going to be able to refuse her.”
Grace let out a long exhale and looked up at him, “It’s easy. Just say no.”
“But then Alice or Carlisle will do it,” Edward shook his head annoyed again.
“Then stop them,” Grace said simply, grumbling now.
“Were it so easy,” he said, his eyes trained on Grace now. “Would you help?”
“I have tried.She won’t listen to me. She’ll throw supernatural destiny in my face and call it square.”
“So what happens then? I change her and your pack comes after us for the rest of our lives?” Edward said disappointedly. “I told her forever and I meant it.”
“I don’t know what will happen, but you definitely won’t be welcome back to Forks and neither will Bella. Not anyone. But what other way is there?” Grace looked tired suddenly. “I’m not starting the war but I will put a stop to it if it starts.”
“You think we want a war?” Edward probed.
“No, but the pack will see it as nothing other than a gauntlet thrown. And without the treaty in place, they won’t have any reason not to come after you. It depends on how far Sam lets them go.”
“But you’ll help us, right?” Edward’s eyes were controlled. Grace looked up at him.
“She’s my family, which makes you my family, which probably makes me a traitor, so yes?” Grace narrowly avoided pricking her finger to the point of blood as she hissed. “But I highly doubt they’ll kill me. Who knows though.” Grace sighed dejectedly. “Happy returns.” she toasted one of the boutaneers and frowned. “I’m sorry, I’m trying.”
Edward nodded and looked back to the wedding dress before making his way past her. He paused and put a cold hand on her shoulder causing her to look up, “It’s okay. We’ll meet it as it comes….together,” he gave her a reassuring smile and left her in the room alone.
The ceremony was everything Grace had imagined. As she sat in the front row next to Renee and Charlie in her silvery blue satin dress, her hair spilling gorgeously down her back and pulled half up with soft wispy strands floating around her face, she couldn’t help but think that this is what forever must look like with someone you loved beyond words.
Bella stared so intently at Edward, at every vow he uttered and he returned the look. There was everything between and yet they were close, conquered immeasurable hurtles, fought death and destruction, and promised forever. Grace’s eyes glittered with tears as they were pronounced man and wife and with a soft, endearing, and terribly intimate kiss, they turned to smile adoringly at their loved ones.
Grace broke into loud cheers and claps, hearing Embry, Quil, and Seth crooning at the very back close to the treeline.
The night wore on easy from there, Grace and Bella happily discarding their high heels to go barefoot to the shock and laughter of Alice. They danced until their lungs hurt on the dance floor with Angela and Jessica and Mike and Eric. A farewell to their childhood in the most spectacularly noisy way possible.
After a few slow songs that she coerced Seth and then Embry to dance with her on, she collapsed into a chair fanning herself. The night had come upon them long ago and Grace shone like moonlight in her dress. She turned to Embry and Quil at her table and said “I’m going to get a drink do you guys want—” but she was cut off by their nervous looks.
“What? Don’t tell me you’re chickening out now! You made it through a whole ceremony and dance party with a bunch of vampires.” she said a smile moving across her face teasing them.
“Must be the punch,” Quil played off and took another swig. Grace shrugged and looked back to the dance floor. But her eyes saw the receding figures of Edward and Bella sneak around the back of the house. “Where are they going?”
Her question was short lived though because Seth was pulling her up onto the dance floor again, trying to spin and gleefully dip her to his heart’s content. Seth was a good head and half taller than her now, even though he was barely 15. They drew the stares and laughter of couples closest to them but Grace didn’t care. Just a week after her meeting with Ti’Hal, she was starting to feel better.
She didn’t lose her breath every other second, she was recasting with ease around the reservation, Sam had reinstated her back onto patrols, and she had even spent the afternoon baking with Emily just for fun. She was by no means whole, and the grief would often return at night when she was alone in bed, but she was standing on her own two feet again and it didn’t hurt so much to smile. She had her pack to thank for that. They wholeheartedly threw themselves into Grace’s path to help her along in her healing. No flickering thoughts or judgements were thrown her way and even Paul was helpful on rounds.
He had somewhat patched up with Rachel according to Quil, visiting her every weekend at UW after she went back in August. They were taking it slow, but something told Grace that it wouldn’t take long. Paul was happier by the day, a warm glow bouncing off of him as he ran through the forest and Grace breathed a sigh of relief at that. He needed to be happy so that she could be happy too. She just wasn’t sure how yet.
Once the song ended, Angela was by her side, “Hey have you seen Bella? We should take our shots in the photobooth now!” her cheeks were rosy and she’d definitely had some of the famous punch.
“Oh! I’ll grab her, I think I saw her and Edward heading around back to go smoooooch,” Grace said happily pulling out of Seth’s arms to his shock and protest.
Grace bounded off the dance floor and around the back of the house, humming to the song back in the crowd without realizing a little too late that she was indeed a party crasher.
“Hey, Bella! Ange wants to take pictures in the photobooth if you’re ready—” her mouth closed quick as she came to an abrupt halt.
In the dark, moonlit clearing, Bella was standing in front of none other than Jacob Black. His hair was longer but he had pulled it up into a loosely fitted bun to keep it out of his face. His features were hard, like sunwarmed stone and his frame was somehow broader, more sure, but shaking. Her eyes connected with his instantly and that familiar rush, the pang in her stomach that had been dormant roared to life. Her whole body tingled with anticipation and then fizzled quietly as Jake automatically took a step back from Bella, trying to quell the violent shaking in his body.
Grace was having a hard time reading his face, the emotions were changing so quickly: fear, desire, sadness, overwhelming joy, crushing pain, and finally, hard as stone anger.
“I...I’m sorry I didn’t know you were..” Grace breathed unable to take her eyes off of the man that she had loved for the past year, maybe longer, maybe in lifetimes before if she would let herself remember, “Busy.” she finally breathed taking a step up the hill. “Jacob.” She had to say his name, just once. A call for a hopeful return. Jake gave an imperceptible shake of the head and held his body tight.
“‘I came to see Bella.” His voice even laced with so much anger was music to her ears. She had to hold in a sigh of relief at finally hearing it again outside of her dreams.
“Right,” she said, finally pulling her gaze from Jake to Bella who was looking at her tearfully. “I’ll just…” She turned and hastily made her exit, but could clearly hear a strangled groan coming from Jacob as she left. Her heart was about to burst with how quickly it was hammering in her chest. Just as she came to the crest of the hill, she bumped into Edward who grasped onto her forearms to steady her.
“Are you alright?” he said worriedly.
“Yeah, I just….Jacob,” she shook her head and Edward looked over her down the hill. Something was clearly escalating now in the clearing from which she had come but she needed steady ground. Edward let go of her as she pushed past him and made her way toward Embry and Quil. They looked up at her with clear worry and she put a hand on each of their shoulders. Embry raised his hand to place over hers and she took deep, gulping breaths like she had been drowning. After a couple of minutes, she calmed her breathing and opened her eyes to look at them.
“You okay?” Quil said, clear worry in his eyes. He knew Jacob was near.
“Jacob’s back,” she breathed, a small smile pulling at the side of her mouth without her meaning to. Quil and Embry shot each other a look like she had truly lost it this time.
But it felt like coming up for air. Jacob returning didn’t hurt, it felt good, and the warmth that Ti’Hal had shot through her a week ago ratcheted up her body and nestled in her belly again.
Jacob came back.
Her eyes went wide and Quil stood up to brace her back. She took one startled look at Quil and drifted over to the photobooth where Jessica and Angela were giggling while holding a tray between them. Grace leaned in and took one of the shots from the tray throwing it back down her throat to squeals of delight from Angela. She took another one and downed that too making a ‘Blegh’ sound after and Jessica protested:
“Hey! That one was mine!” Grace sloppily wiped the back of her hand against her mouth.
“I’ll get you more. Don’t let Esme see,” Grace sneakily darted her eyes around the dance floor. Esme already knew but the pretense was important. It added to their glee hiding in the booth and taking shots.
“Where’s Bella?” Angela said through giggles.
“Couldn’t find her,” Grace said shortly squeezing in and pressing start on the photobooth to take 6 quick pictures. Just as the flashes started to pop, Bella peeked her head in with a quick ‘Hey,” her eyes still red rimmed.
The shots were hitting Grace’s stomach now and she looked at Bella delighted. They all returned with a joyful “Hey!” and pulled her into the tight booth, sitting Bella on their collective laps and clinking yet another round of shots together. Bella hesitantly took hers but one look at Grace and she downed it quickly.
“Boys,” Bella murmured, pulling a face as the flash went off again. Grace tightened her grip around Bella’s hand.
The cheers were deafening around her as she stood off to the side of the crowd for Bella and Edward’s send off to their honeymoon. Quil and Embry flanked her while Seth was standing out in front throwing rice and soaking in the wonder of the moment. As they came to the end, Bella reached for Grace and pulled her into her arms tightly.
“Have fun okay?” Grace said, the words getting choked as emotion swept through her.
“I will..” Bella whispered.
“And come back okay, Bells?” Grace pulled back from her and looked her in the eyes. “Come back.”
“I will, I promise,” she nodded and they swept each other into one more hug, before Grace released her and she went to say goodbye to her parents.
She turned to Quil and Embry just a tad wobbly still from the shots, “Ready?” They nodded and she called for Seth. As they moved into the treeline, Grace looked over her shoulder and sent a silent pleading thought out one more time to Bella, Please, please come back.
In the distance, she heard a wolf howl.
La Última Lágrima
Lcdo. Edison Arnao
La última lágrima
Desde el amanecer de los tiempos el hombre se ha fascinado con la dicotomía sempiterna del día y la noche, esas dos deidades imponentes que dominan nuestro ciclo de vida.
La sinergia consecuente entre una estrella y un satélite, aunque paradójicamente hemos articulado al sol con el pronombre "el" dándole un carácter masculino y a la luna como "illa" en latín, asociándose al femenino....
El astro rey de magnificente poder que sucumbe cada día ante la llegada de la reina de la noche...un ciclo sin fin de nacimiento, plenitud y declive. Esta aristotélica divergencia filosófica que nos recuerda que todo es efímero y fugas.... Pero que siempre se vislumbra una certeza de renacimiento.
El ser humano en su "cueva" asume que, en su limitada existencia, lo que logramos y tenemos es para siempre... así que muchos no valoran lo que tienen en su momento, sino cuando ya se convierte en un bonito recuerdo... Lo que tuvimos, lo que hacíamos, lo que disfrutamos..... añoramos lo que fuimos, no contemplamos lo que somos y con la "esperanza" de renacimiento, tenemos la incertidumbre de lo que seremos... Pero, el tiempo es limitado.....
Acertijo: ¿Qué es lo que nunca se recupera...? .... Cerrar un ciclo no significa negar lo que somos, al contrario, es entenderlo para decidir si: cambiar radicalmente, modificar lo que nos afecta o persistir (si creemos en ello)....
Sin embargo todos nos aferramos a aquellos que nos causa satisfacción plena, felicidad y alegría. Somos "intensamente" emocionales y víctimas de nuestros sentimientos... A veces sacrificamos nuestro tiempo pensando que las cosas mejorarán....
Durante un eclipse de sol, lo que damos por sentado sufre una disrupción; aquello que siempre estuvo allí, día tras día, consecuente y eterno ya no está... Se apaga... La sombra domina la claridad.
Pensamos en los hermosos días soleados, en los amaneceres coloridos y en las flores esplendorosas iluminadas por el sol tras un chubasco..... Pero también recordamos los días de calor extenuante, nuestra piel después de un día de playa y los agobiante que puede ser caminar bajo lo inclemente de su resplandor... Pero, cualquier recuerdo adversos desaparece ante la eminencia de que ya no está....
Por unos instantes sentimos lo inicuo que pueden ser nuestras plegarias ante un hecho inexorable.... Inevitablemente nuestro sentimientos encontrados nos albergan y nos llenan de confusión y hastío, saliendo de nuestros ojos una lágrima por aquello que "un día fue y ya no será..."
Y aunque sabemos que solo durará unos instantes, nos consume la duda...
al salir de nuevo el primer rayo de luz a consumir las tinieblas sabes que ya no es igual.... Todo cambió.... Lo inmutable ahora es vulnerable... Es la hora de cambiar y pensar en lo que te toca vivir en esta nueva realidad...
y entiendes que esa fue
"la última lágrima..."
Edison Arnao R. 1404202
The Trouvelot Astronomical Drawings, 1882
Étienne Léopold Trouvelot
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A lot of people new to peafowl See their hens in this position and think that the hen is sick or injured. But, she is actually just getting ready to lay an egg sometime in the next 24 hours (in this case, I expect she will lay within a couple of hours, since she's been laying in the late evening). Given the size of the eggs peahens lay, it's unsurprising that they're very dramatic about it beforehand. This is also a good reason to encourage them to go broody rather than continue laying, even if you ultimately give her fake eggs to sit for a while, because it means less chance of eggbinding. Brooding isn't exactly great for their bodies either, but that can just be broken after a couple weeks and they're then unlikely to lay again that season.
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I've got a lot of twilight opinions today apparently lol but wtf is up with the costume change for victoria? Like storytelling wise makes zero sense for her to start out looking wild and feral and then each movie after she looks more refined and put together? Having just lost her mate and now the only thing she cares about is killing Bella why would she start putting effort into maintaining her appearance? I can kind of understand for Eclipse because she has to put on a front for Riley, but even in New Moon she looks way more cleaned up and styled than she did in Twilight. Like imagine how good the visual storytelling would have been if the first.time we saw her in new moon she's was wearing the same outfit as twilight just now it's ragged and the white fur coat is like almost totally brown now. It would just really solidify just how obsessed she has become. Then to cut to edward in Volterra wearing a tattered version of the same outfit her wore when he left Bella?! To show just how much a vampire losing their mate impacts them?
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pHotO dUmpP ~
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My precisious little queen❤️❤️
ESP LTD EC-1000 Deluxe 🥰🥰❤️
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Chapter 32: Mistake
Jacob was shaking violently before her. Low clouds had rolled in on the horizon and it threatened to rain. The thunder sounded ominously off the shore and Grace was standing, stock still on her front porch staring at the boy she loved as he crumbled.
“You….you slept with him?” his voice cracked from the weight of the words. She was out of tears, her eyes just burned fiercely and her voice croaked with dehydration.
“Yes,” it killed her to admit it. Something in her cracked as she tried to move toward him. He shot her a look and exhaled a fierce breath through his nose.
“No,” he growled. His eyes leveled her with a silent command that locked her in place. She had to obey. Her eyes went wide and she stopped and clenched her hands around the bottom of her shorts.
“It just...happened. I didn’t..we knew it was a mistake right away. I’m so sorry, please. I—,” Grace couldn’t move from the spot she was in and she felt like she was choking. The hurt radiated off of Jacob’s body in clear pulses as he shook wildly. She thought he was going to explode, a part of her really wanted him to so that she could feel the pain she knew she deserved at this moment.
The thunder clapped behind him again, louder this time, the storm coming in too fast. The sound echoed in her head and she felt a rush move through her. Another change—a strangled small sound escaped her lips as she tried to step forward toward him.
Jake’s face twisted in anger, his teeth clenched, and his fists hung heavy by his sides. His breathing was fast and loud and she braced for impact. Oh how she wished he would.
A cry like that of a wounded animal escaped his lips and she felt her insides twist wildly in excruciating pain. Was he doing that? Grace’s eyes widened in fear.
But then, the anger was replaced with debilitating sadness and tears sprang to his eyes. He went limp, his eyes casting to the ground and Grace felt the constricting pain loosen.
This was somehow worse. Much worse. After a few terrifying moments of silence he raised his eyes to hers, black with quiet rage, took one ragged breath and said with venom laced in his voice, “I hate you.”
Grace broke into a thousand pieces, whimpering in the spot she couldn’t seem to leave. Before she could get anything out, he had turned, phased and left through the trees. It felt like someone had cut a taut thread holding her body together. She felt her body let out a scream as he left, still unable to move, so Grace did the only thing she thought she could do. She called out to him in her mind desperately:
JACOB! JAKE. JAKE PLEASE. JACOB, COME BACK!
But she couldn’t hear him anymore. She collapsed in a heap on the ground. It felt like she was bleeding but she had no physical wounds to speak of. The ache in her belly exploded into a thrashing snake that burned and tore at her. Thunder echoed around as rain came crashing down around her in a torrential downpour. There was no relief.
She felt everything for what felt like forever and then, excruciatingly, she felt nothing at all. For however long Grace had laid there, it rained on her and she welcomed it. She turned onto her back and let her mouth hang open as rain dripped down her throat. Nothing offered any relief. She was empty.
Grace heard splashing footsteps approach. She was still soaked through and shivering but she pulled herself up and stood, uneven on her two feet. Her vision blurred from the rain and she rubbed her eyes to clear them just in time to see Rachel, stomping toward her.
In one fell swoop, Rachel raised her arm and slapped Grace as hard as she could across the face. The searing pain whipped through her cheek and into the back of her head, sending white lights popping behind her eyes. She wasn’t sure if she let out any sound other than heaving a breath before she righted herself to see Rachel rigid with anger.
“How fucking dare you.” her voice was seething and Grace flinched at it’s acid. She opened her mouth as if to reply but Rachel’s eyes warned her not too. “How dare you treat me and my brother like this. I have no idea who you are but if the old Grace is in there, relay this message to her as well.” She paused for a second and leaned in so her face was close to Grace’s. “FUCK. YOU.” Rachel was fire and Grace was dry grass. She was consumed by her rage and turned to ash. Rachel took one last look at her, spitting on the ground next to her and walked away.
Grace staggered on the spot and pulled herself up the steps holding onto her left cheek where Rachel had slapped her. As she pushed through her open doorway, sopping and dripping, she slipped in a puddle of her own making. She landed hard on the wood floor just inside of her front door and stayed there. Her heartbeat slowed and she hoped that sleep would take her at least for a little while. But the pain returned to keep her awake as long as it wanted, raking her over the coals and making her see Jacob’s pained face, hear the echoing words ‘I hate you’ over and over and Rachel’s tearful, enraged face as she screamed at her.
Grace fell into the unending black.
The cool, late summer air pushed through the open window. Soft steps down the stairs leading into the kitchen complemented the peaceful silence that hung in the air right before sunrise. The coffee machine sputtered quietly as the soft footsteps made their way to the couch, covering the sleeping boy with a light throw blanket, his broad, russet back exposed.
Steam wafted from the top of the coffee cup as it was pressed to full lips. The sun slowly rose, breaking over Grace’s face as she stood on the edge of the beach letting the cold turning water lap up and kiss her toes. She stared out over the horizon, letting the day wash over her, trembling from the cold or the anticipation. Shaking the last of the pain prickling in her hands free, she took a deep breath and turned to go back inside.
A couple hours after day break, Grace walked over to the sleeping form on her couch.
“Hey, wake up. Breakfast,” she nudged the grumbling boy in the shoulder and waved an oversized stack of pancakes in front of his face. The boy’s eye peeped open and reached for the stack. “At the table.” Grace said, her voice monotone.
Embry slumped into the chair across from her and dug into a stack of pancakes untouched by Grace. She picked over a bowl of yogurt and watched him chow down.
“Late night?” she offered. He nodded between bites, his eyes rolling into the back of his head in pure bliss at the food.
“Yeah, ran damn near to Canada. Thanks for letting me crash,” he said mouth full. Grace nodded. This was a regular thing with most of the pack. Her home was a stop gap between Forks and the rez. Sometimes, if they were too tired, they’d crash at her place, not able to make it all the way home. She left her door unlocked and would often find a snoring member on her couch, in her armchair, or on the spare mattress she set up in her office for just such an occasion.
At first, she had internally protested their presence. The first week after Jake was gone, Grace didn’t leave the house. Embry and Quil had made quick work of the locked door without damaging it (much to Jared’s dismay) and found her in bed, conscious but not responsive.
“Should we call someone?” Embry had said worriedly as he sat on the side of her bed after trying to make her look at him. “Ti’Hal maybe?” Quil shifted uneasily from foot to foot and nodded over his shoulder. Jared and Embry followed him out into the hall where he quietly said,
“Let’s try to find Jake first. And if we can’t, then we’ll bring in Ti’Hal, yeah?” Jared was peering through the door with fear in his eyes. While he’d never seen it himself, he recognized something in Grace that he’d heard only in the legends. He kept his mouth shut though and nodded to the others.
“Yeah, let’s find Jake.”
But they were unsuccessful. No matter how far they ran in any direction, they heard nothing. After that first week, Embry, Quil, and Jared would casually start showing up at Grace’s place, prying open the door and sleeping over on the couch or munching on snacks in the kitchen. The noise roused Grace more than once and when she finally found enough energy to creep down the top steps looking haggard she was met with a delighted wave from Quil. She scowled and turned back up to her room locking herself in.
Seth and Leah quickly followed suit, then Brady and Collin, and even Sam. Sam had taken one look at her after that first week and the next day Emily was there, tidying up the house, cooking meals, and rolling Grace onto her side like an elderly patient to change her sheets. Leah had hauled her from the bed from under the arms and put her in the tub, carefully undressing her and turning on the hot water. Grace had broken down into tears in the bathtub as Leah had washed her hair like she was a little kid. Leah didn’t protest when Grace leaned into her, getting soap all over her shirt and sobbed.
She’d refused to see Ti’Hal, mostly due to shame. She wasn’t ready to hear the extent to which she had royally fucked up. Not yet.
Grace crossed her arms, sitting back and staring past Embry toward the door.
“So...the big day is upon us,” Embry said gently. Grace snapped her eyes back to him looking for clarification. When she dazed off like that everything went out of focus and she lost all connection to solid ground. “Bella and the leech are getting married?” he prompted.
“Oh, yeah,” Grace said, closing her eyes tight to shake off the blurriness and come back to center. “Yeah, tomorrow. You still coming?”
Embry shrugged his shoulders not meeting her eyes as he finished off his pancakes. Grace got lost again and only came to when Embry patted her shoulder and said goodbye.
“Are you gonna be able to walk in those?” Grace said skeptically, sitting on the front deck of the Cullen house and watching as Bella scraped across the wood leaving marks. Even though the weather was still fairly warm for September, Grace was wrapped in a blanket wearing a giant oversized sweater and sweatpants. She was constantly cold these days.
“Can’t I just go barefoot?” Bella said, unsteady on her feet. Alice looked like someone had punched her in the stomach, not that she would feel it if they had.
“Absolutely not! This isn’t some backyard hoedown, you will wear the Jimmy Choos and you will appreciate the Jimmy Choos.” Alice chided. She tried to demonstrate again for Bella, gliding gracefully across the deck.
“To be fair, it is in a backyard,” Bella said. Grace pointed a finger at her and her eyes lit up momentarily before being clouded by dull pain. Bella watched the fleeting moment of joy dissipate on Grace’s face with increased worry.
It had been three months. Three months since Jake had taken off. No one tried to go after him at first, but it became clear as the hours turned into days and turned into weeks that he wasn’t coming back. Whatever broke in Grace that day had broken in Jacob too.
After a month, Bella asked Edward to go looking for him, hoping that the luck he had last time in finding Jake would happen again. But nothing came of it. He and Carlisle reached out to their contacts but they were very limited in offering identifying information considering they were trying to keep the pack’s existence a secret.
He was just gone. And Grace was left behind. The pack was in disarray as Grace lost herself. Sam had banished her from patrols and trainings since she couldn’t stay focused. Her recasting was almost nonexistent—anytime she tried to recast she ended up miles away from where she intended. She was thrown completely out of sync.
As she sat watching Bella scrape her way across the deck, Grace felt that familiar buoying sensation that made her feel like she was thrashing around in an open ocean, unsteady and untethered. This feeling was constant ever since she felt that thread snap in her when Jake left. She rubbed absently at the dark purple bruises under her eyes from the ongoing lack of sleep. It was if her body was punishing her for what she did during the day and her mind took up the task at night throwing nightmare after nightmare that would leave her screaming herself awake in a cold sweat.
She tightened the blanket around her to brace herself against the feeling more and gave Bella a weary smile when she looked her way.
“Bella you have to promise me you’ll practice this week. There’s only five days left!” Alice squealed.
“I have been practicing,” Bella said with a terrified look on her face.
“Just….practice more then!” Alice said cheerfully.
Bella dropped Grace off at Sam and Emily’s place in the afternoon. Grace plopped into the nearest chair in the kitchen. Emily turned to look over at her as she kneaded some bread dough on the counter.
“How was it?” she said nonchalantly. Grace made a sound of affirmation, not wanting to elaborate. Sam walked out from the bedroom door, pulling a shirt over his head before kissing Emily on the temple. He looked across the kitchen at Grace and she gave him that desperate faraway stare.
As far as Spirit Bird’s went, she was probably the worst in her histories. Completely useless to her Alpha and unable to do anything of value at the moment. The girl who had decimated a horde of newborn vampires in a clearing was long gone. She could hardly lift her arms above her head. Sam glanced from Grace to Emily who gave him a worried nod, encouraging him to say what they had discussed earlier.
“I think it’s time to see Ti’Hal,” he said in a stern voice. Grace took awhile to react, slow and encumbered with fatigue at just existing. She let out a tired breath and tried to protest:
“Sam,” she croaked weakly, but he just shook her head at her, throwing what little energy she had to fight out the window. “Fine.” she said sullenly. Let Ti’Hal tell her she was broken, that there’d been a mistake, that she wasn’t actually the Spirit Bird but a perfect fake who destroyed lives instead.
Ti’Hal’s home was small but well maintained thanks to the community. She held most of the tribes histories and so she was treasured amongst nearly every member of the tribe. Sam handed Grace over to Ti’Hal on the doorstep much like a child of divorcees. She felt like that a lot recently: a helpless kid who didn’t know what to do or how to exist in this world. It drove her crazy, but the painful stupor kept her still.
Ti’Hal gave Sam a small, sad smile and took Grace’s hand leading her into her home to the small comfortable living room. She had a fire going and Grace trembled at it’s warmth, only a faint echo of the warmth she used to feel with Jake. She slumped to the floor and Ti’Hal shuffled away to the kitchen to make some tea as Grace stared into the fire.
Before long Ti’Hal was next to her, handing her a cup of tea and settling into the armchair next to her. Grace leaned her back against the side of the armchair and let out a whimper.
“Where have you been, Little Bird?” Ti’Hal said softly, her gentle, raspy voice mixing in with the flames. Grace wasn’t sure how to answer and shook her head. “There is so much pain you have caused each other. Why? Why do you fight so hard against who you are?”
Grace turned her body to look at Ti’Hal. Anger, the only emotion her body would let her feel completely other than pain, was apparent on her face. Ti’Hal continued.
“You’re angry about the imprint. What you see as cruel fate interfering with your happiness. But what if you are seeing it through the wrong eyes?”
Grace’s face contorted to that of confusion. “Who’s eyes am I supposed to look through if the whole problem is I’m fighting against who I’m supposed to be?”
“Grace, you are exceptionally perceptive at feelings, but you are not listening. What has your heart been telling you this whole time?”
“That he will leave me for his imprint so I retroactively fucked us up as a form of self-destruction and protection to ensure at least one of us ends up happy.” Grace said aggressively. Ti’Hal shook her head.
“The imprint...the imprint is more than a means to an end. An imprint happens when the wolf warrior needs it most, when they are exactly who they are supposed to be. It is the purest form of fate, that is dictated by the fated’s actions. You see fate as cruel, something you cannot control, but you are the one dictating it with every move of your muscle. So why do you insist on betraying yourself?”
“I don’t understand,” Grace said slowly.
“Stop worrying about fate and become your truest self. Only then will it fall into place. Who you’re meant to be, who he is meant to be. If you don’t, you will continue in this dance around one another and only end up suffering.”
“That’s it? Just be yourself? That’s your world changing advice?” Grace said, the anger back again. She was on her feet. Ti’Hal nodded, so sure. “Ti’Hal what?! Don’t you see what’s happened? I fucked up! I broke. And I destroyed the only thing that was good...for me.” She choked.
“Where there is a break, there is healing. You are the Spirit Bird. So heal. The uncertainty will dissolve when you make the decision and become who you are meant to be.”
“They made a mistake. The ancestors. I’m not...I don’t think I can do this. I’m not strong enough for this,” Grace was shaking, swaying in place. A hard look came across Ti’Hal’s face and her arm shot out with such speed and force that it startled Grace.
“Fight HARDER for yourself.” Grace felt fire run up her arm, ignite her veins from Ti’Hal’s touch and the dull cloud of pain cleared. Hot flames licked down her body, burning away the cold that had trapped her since Jake was gone. The snapped thread still hung empty in her body, but she felt the solid ground under her feet for the first time in awhile.
Ti’Hal let go of her and the feeling remained, echoing in ripples up and down her body. “He will return. His soul has heard the call of another’s and he won’t be able to stay away for too long. I suggest you prepare yourself by heeding my advice. Become who you were meant to be, for the good of the tribe, for your pack, for young Jacob Black. For you.” She said firmly, the last words echoing in Grace’s head loudly. She nodded, swallowing hard, to show she understood and crept toward the door.
When she pushed it open, the cool air washed over her feverish body and she shivered from the sensation. Her senses had been dulled for so long and now she felt everything again, the pain, the rush of the wind, the sound of the ocean crashing nearby, the warm earth under her feet.
As she took a step out of the door, onto the grass, her body shifted and she recast deep into the forest, coming to a stop next to Sam. He was addressing the pack and turned to look at her. The pack followed his gaze to her and she looked to each of them, resolved to heal, resolved to find her way back to them.
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Cayde to Eclipse: "Gotcha covered, Sweetcheeks." *points at her*
I'm bored, sorry lol. XD
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#Twilight (Movie) Saga #Trivia this #InstagramLIVE on Thursday, April 22 at 7:30pm ET, hosted by @EdanStanley. Follow @TriviaADDotCom on #Instagram to play! #TwilightSaga #Vampires #Werewolves #BellaSwan #EdwardCullen #NewMoon #Eclipse #BreakingDawn #JacobBlack #TeamEdward #TeamJacob #RobertPattinson #KristenStewart #TaylorLautner #VampireRomance #ThingsToDo #FreeEvents #FreeInNYC #TBT #ThrowbackThursday (at New York, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNuVv6xDg8j/?igshid=1skxpzlnwmerj
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I was looking up “ Jack Black “ and realized something
JACK STANDS FOR JACOB!!!
Can we get a remake of Twilight where everything’s the same but Jake is played by Jack Black??
Thought I‘d do another study but this time I wanted to stylize because book headcanon...
I was so unhappy with the jasper sketches I did in my sketchbook that I felt I did him dirty and had to redo but he looks more like I imagined him to look like in the books
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Okay so for YEARS since I read Breaking Dawn... I mean it’s been what? 11 years since I read it? I have specifically remembered one detail because I didn’t understand it when I read it at age 13. I recently realized what it was, and finally got ahold of my book to go back and make sure I wasn’t fucking crazy and-
STEPHANIE MEYER PUT COCKWARMING IN BREAKING DAWN.
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I Don’t - Paul Lahote X Reader
Angstttt. But you know I can’t just leave it 😂 so pt.2 will be coming. 1.2K words, some cursing, let me know if you enjoyed ❤️
I smiled at the huge sparkling diamond wrapped around Emily’s finger. It was almost blinding, dancing in the sunlight as she moved her hand.
“It’s beautiful,” I admitted.
I could almost feel my heart wince as I came to the realization I would probably never have this. That feeling of excitement, that constant physical reminder of love, that someone made the decision they wanted to be with me for eternity.
“He still hasn’t changed his mind, huh?” Emily’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts as she retracted her hand to wrap around her coffee mug.
“Oh, don’t worry about it. It’s not that big of a deal really,” I lied straight to her face. She knew it too, but didn’t press any further.
“I’m really happy for you, have you thought about a date yet?” I said attempting to change the subject. This was about her, not me.
She perked up at this, “Yeah! I actually have had everything planned out for awhile,” she chuckled as she pulled up Pinterest, showing me an entirety of wedding posts.
“Awwww that dress style would be perfect on you!! God maybe this will help Jared get off his ass soon and propose,” Kim interjected, laughing.
“Have you guys talked about it at all?” I questioned, more selfishly wanting to know what Jared’s thoughts were on marriage.
She nodded, “I bring it up all the time, he jokes that if I stop talking about it he will, because he wants it to be a suprise,” she smiled.
What was Paul’s problem then?
We talked more about the wedding, and the more we did the more I couldn’t shake the feeling of disappointment. I genuinely was happy to see one of my best friend’s get married. I was excited to be a part of it with her, but I was secretly filled with envy.
As we bid our goodbyes I drove home in silence, thoughts of what could be and what reality was were fighting within my thoughts. Walking into the house I set my things on the counter, suddenly feeling big strong arms embrace me from behind in warmth.
“Hi baby” he mumbled as he nestled into my neck.
“Hey” I sighed, turning around.
“How was Emily’s?” He smiled, arms still latched around my waist.
“Great, we just talked about the wedding the entire time...”
He chuckled, “Oh yeah I can’t wait. It’s gonna make for an awesome party,” he let go, getting a beverage out of the refrigerator.
I looked down at my feet, wanting to hide my emotions but also wanting him to know how I felt.
He noticed my demeanor immediately, coming back to my side. He rubbed his hands up my arms, “Hey, hey, what’s wrong beautiful?”
“Do you......you know......do you think we could ever get married?” I asked hopefully, already knowing the answer. He dropped his hands backing against the counter, sighing in almost annoyance.
“We’ve been over this, Y/N.”
I just nodded, regretting I even asked.
“You know I love you, with all of my heart and soul I do. I just..don’t think I want to get married.”
“So we’ll just forever be in a relationship then.” I fiddled with the hems of my shirt, distracting myself so I wouldn’t start crying.
“I don’t want to talk about this right now.”
He grabbed his drink and stormed past me to the living room. A few tears slipped as I quietly made my way to our bedroom. Paul & I rarely argued, but when we did we always separated ourselves. I didn’t like the method but with Paul’s anger I knew it was for the best. I slipped under the sheets, and cried myself to sleep.
I woke up to my ringtone, groggily sliding to answer after I saw it was Kim.
“Hello?” I said blinking my eyes as they adjusted to the sunlight.
“Welllllll good morning gorgeous!! I knew you’d over sleep. Get up, we have dress shopping to do!!” I internally slapped myself for agreeing to this last minute after all the wedding talk got the girls hyped up last night.
“Yeah, okay, I’ll see you in 20.”
I hung up and sat up to stretch, sore from falling asleep all curled up.
I showered and got ready, relieved that Paul had already left for patrol. The memories of our conversation came flooding back on repeat again. Determined to not get upset in front of the girls I took a deep breath, and left.
“Oh Em.....it’s absolutely stunning!!” Kim gushed on my side as we watched Emily put on her fourth dress, and she was right. It was stunning.
“I think this is the one,” she smiled proudly. The pain in my heart rushed back. As much as I tried to ignore it, the feeling became almost overwhelming. I excused myself to the bathroom, immediately locking the door behind me I sank down to the ground. The tears continued to pour down my face. I thought I would be able to fake it. To sit there and smile and act like I wasn’t falling apart inside. I decided then, that I was done. I stood up, gathering myself. One last look in the mirror, I headed back to the girls. I used the poor excuse of a stomachache and raced home.
Pulling up to the house I was suprised to see Paul’s truck. I thought I would have at least an hour to prepare what exactly I was about to say.
“Screw it,” I turned off the ignition and walked inside.
He was on the couch when I approached him. He sat up straight as he noticed my frazzled state. My emotions completely took over my body.
“So. You DONT want to get married. Ever? Not now? Not a few years later? Never?”
He rolled his eyes and ran his hand through his hair,
“Y/N you’re still upset about this?”
“ANSWER ME, Paul.” I was impatient. I was furious.
He stood up, dropping his arms to his side.
“No....I, I don’t want to get married. Ever.” He said it so nonchalant which only boiled my anger even more. I nodded my head,
“Okay. Okay. Then, I’m done. We’re over.” I said as careless as I could.
His eyes widened,
He reached for me to which I immediately stepped back.
“NO. I have waited, actually. I have waited a long fucking time for you to change your mind, or see why I may want this but you haven’t. You claim you love me so god damn much but you won’t even take the next step in our relationship, let alone EVER. I mean, shit, do you know how it feels to have your bestfriends all talk about their amazing plans for a wedding and then give you a pity look because you’ll never walk down that isle?”
My eyes well up with tears as he stands there listening in pure shock. My voice starts to crack, “I want to marry you because I love you more than I love myself some days. I want to walk into a store with a ring on my finger so everyone knows. I want people to look at us reading our vows and say ‘damn, they really love eachother’”
I wiped my tears and took a deep breath,
“But if that won’t happen, then I can’t do this”
And I walked out the door.
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eclipse dragon that needs an owner! she kinda reminds me of yuri from ddlc lmao
she's up for auction on my ig ‼️
if you can, pls reblog!! art is my own way to make money rn.
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